#if i could do this 5 years ago when 2 debuted...i would have drawn so much pearlina..i still am but like..imagine

[archivebottles]

deep cut drawings from this weekend

[kuromantic]

Tales of Zombish: Haikyuu Light Novel Translation

*This is my translation of the Zombie Knight Zombish snippets from the light novel. It’s split into 5 parts, and inserted between each chapter of the light novel. Don’t copy this to another site. The translation is under the cut!

Zombie Knight Zombish

 1: Zombish is Born!!

Nightfall. A lone swordsman wakes up. A swordsman that does not know of true death, because of experiencing a false death. 

“...Wait, it’s still evening, you stupid crow!” 

The man yells at the small crow beside him, having just woken up by a thin bush. The man’s body was wrapped up in an old, tattered cloth—which must have been a cloak some time ago—which covered his entire body. 

“I could have gotten burned by the setting sun…” The man blocks out the sunlight with the tattered cloth, and the crow caws apologetically. 

“Well, it’s okay. I don’t even have a body that can be burned.” 

The man laughs, and the crow flaps its black wings, flying ahead up into the sky. The man follows it with his gaze, squinting at the brightness. He stands up. 

“Oh, well. Guess I’ll go.” 

The man starts to walk. His frame was thin and delicate, which could be seen even when it was covered with the tattered cloth. And on his back, was a sword. 

The sword, which is large enough to not be recognized as one at first glance, does not suit the lean man. 

“Man, I wonder if a car will pass by… Eh, I guess no sane person would have gasoline now.” 

There’s no road where the man looks ahead. 

In the dead world where smokey, dried up wastelands stretch out for seemingly forever, the man continues to walk alone today.

“Yeah, isn’t this good? Isn’t this good? It sounds like the story’s just begun, right?” 

The rookie mangaka, Udai Tenma, stands up with an excited face and gets another drink from the self-service fountains. He returns to his table with a glass of cola in his hand. He continues working on his storyboard. 

The only equipment on the table is a notebook, a pencil and an eraser. On the open page, there are scribbles that nobody else could decipher. It’s the storyboard Udai made with all his effort. 

I wanna try and make a manga. I like it. With that, Udai had drawn a manga during his college years. And it had won an honourable mention in the rookie awards. He had gotten an editor and debuted as a mangaka. But the reality was, he wasn’t quite reaching serialization. 

But now, “Zombie Knight Zombish”, is being created in the restaurant. And there’s a confidence that hasn’t been there before. 

“‘Everything but death is nothing but a scratch’? He needs to get over himself… No, maybe ‘Mortal bodies, they make me jealous.’...” 

Udai mumbles dialogues to himself, changing his expressions to suit the main character’s. The other customers at the restaurant glance at him. 

But he can’t afford to care about those gazes.

Zombish needs to help the heroine attacked by the enemy, in an extremely cool and overdramatic manner. 

And the enemy has to be a fated opponent that Zombish has known before turning into a zombie. The heroine needs to be a key person, for Zombish to return from zombie to human. And of course, she needs to be cute, a little strong-willed, who tries to join in on the fighting sometimes. But also a girl who you just want to protect…

A flash. 

The girl’s eyes can only capture the white hand, emerging from the tattered cloth and gripping the sword on his back. 

She feels wind brush past her cheeks, and closes her eyes. She opens them again, and the bandits have already collapsed onto the dry ground. 

“Huh? What…?” 

As the girl struggles to comprehend what had happened, Zombish is already starting to walk away. 

“Hey, don’t leave me behind!” 

She grabs the knight. At that moment, the tattered cloth on him rips and falls to the ground. 

What appears is not the handsome knight she expected. Nor a fighter that’s big and well-muscled. It’s a skeleton. 

“...Wait, bone?! Why bone! Bone? Wait, do bones even talk?!” 

“Yeah, I’m bone! So sorry I’m bone, sue me!” 

The knight picks up the truly tattered piece of rag, and hides his body. It truly looks like a skeletal model. He turns his back to the girl. 

“Anyway, I’m bone. So I can’t go with you. Protect yourself, you’re on your own.” 

The “bone”, that had slain a crowd of bandits instantly, tries to walk away from one single girl, as if to escape from her. 

Staring at Zombish’s lanky, weak-looking back and the huge sword on it, the girl shouts over at him. 

“Hey, bone! Can you eat?” 

Zombish turns around, lifts the tattered cloth, and points around his stomach with a laugh. 

“You wanna see me eat? It’s hilarious.” 

“If you don’t eat… That means I don’t have to share my food or water with you, right?”

“Huh?” 

“It doesn’t matter if you’re bone or not, if you can defeat these guys. You’re pretty strong.” The girl points to the iron-clad, muscular bandit with a mohawk. “And I should sew that cloth I ripped back together…” 

Zombish laughs, his hard skull distorting a little. “I’m not strong. Those guys are just small fries. But I guess I’ll have you fix this cloth for me.” 

At those words, the girl runs up to him. 

In the dried-up world of death, two footsteps mark their paths. Up above in the sky, a crow flies around in circles. As if to watch over them. 

Zombish’s journey has just started!! 

“I wonder what my editor will say…” 

 The man, once the “Little Giant”, leaves the restaurant and returns home. And without changing his clothes, collapses into his futon for the first time in a while.

2. VS Editor A!! 

“Zombies aren’t usually skeletons, right?” Akaashi Keiji opens his heavy mouth, holding his coffee in one hand. It makes Akaashi heavy-hearted to meddle with a work an author brought to him. 

Kanda, Chiyoda City, Tokyo. 

In the editorial department of Weekly Shonen Vie, there’s an extreme lack of people in the afternoon. 

The rookie mangaka, Udai Tenma, freezes momentarily in the meeting space. And he attempts to brush it off with a laugh. 

“Yeah, I thought, ‘Is a skeleton okay?’ for a bit. But maybe a Japanese-style zombie would be new, and I thought I could pull it off. We all get cremated in Japan, too. Hahaha.” 

“I see.” 

Akaashi looks at the copy of “Zombie Knight Zombish” on the table, and Udai laughing in front of him. And he says one more time, with force behind his words. That this is the last time he’ll say this, and he won’t say the same thing again. 

“Zombies aren’t usually skeletons, right.” 

The question mark had disappeared. 

It’s not a question, but a confirmation of fact. 

“...Yeah.” Udai replies weakly. He drops his shoulders, and bites the straw of his cola. 

 It’s tough. 

It had been his best work. He had a confidence in it, that he hadn’t before with his other works. But his concept had been fundamentally criticized. 

The editor continues talking to the crestfallen Udai. 

“And one more thing.” 

“...What is it?” 

Udai hunches his shoulders, looking up at Akaashi like a scolded child. Akaashi sips his coffee, adjusts his glasses and lets out a breath. He opens his mouth slowly. 

“We’ve established that a skeleton is not a zombie. But I think this skeleton’s design is a little lacking, in the first place. It’s no different to any old skeleton. For the main character, I want a quirk that will tell you it’s Zombish with just one look.” 

“Any old skeleton?” Udai says, and draws a normal-looking skeleton into his notebook. 

“Yes. For example, he could be wearing glasses, or he could have a large scar. I want a unique design. Even if you draw him simply, you would know it’s him. If I were to ask for more, I’d even say make his silhouette recognizable. That’s how strong his design should be.” 

Udai adds a scar to his skeleton, and mumbles, “I guess it can’t be a scar, if his silhouette has to be recognizable.” 

“The scar is just one example.” 

“I’m sorry…” 

Udai slurps the cola at the bottom of the glass, which is pretty much melted ice. He laughs disappointedly. 

“I thought the skeleton was fine, since he was cremated. Like a Japanese-style zombie. Well, there’s no zombie-ness, I guess…” 

At those words, Akaashi’s glasses shine. 

“Then… How about you make Zombish look more Japanese? It could link with his sword, too.” 

“What?” 

“Well, this is just one what-if scenario.” 

“...No, I think it could work. I’ll think about it! Then maybe he can look different from any old zombie!” Udai grabs his pen, and draws a Japanese-style zombie in his notebook. “If it’s Japanese clothes and a sword, he’d just be a samurai… How do I give him the zombie knight feeling…”

Watching the pen move busily and create many versions of Zombish, Akaashi feels a weight lift from his heart. 

It makes him heavy-hearted to meddle with other people’s works. But sometimes, his words make the author take a step in a good direction. That must be why he can continue with this job. 

“So now, please brush up on the work. And, depending on the edited manuscript, I may bring it up during the serialization meeting.” 

Udai’s pen stops moving. “Wait, why?! You’ve been talking about my work so harshly and tearing into it this whole time!” 

“...I haven’t been tearing into it. It’s entertaining, so I just want to make the story even more entertaining.” 

Udai’s face crumples, as he looks up at Akaashi. “Akaashi-san, you weren’t just an unpleasant person, after all!” 

“I’m an unpleasant person…?” 

“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean it that way! I meant it in an um, good way!” 

Akaashi doesn’t ask what exactly he means by that, and organizes the manuscript. “Zombish is very entertaining, compared to the works you have brought me so far. I think you have a chance.” 

“Thank you!” 

“Oh, and lastly…” 

“There’s… still more?” Udai tenses. 

 Akaashi chuckles, before talking. “I’ve been thinking for a while, but this bit on the edge of the page, saying ‘Zombish’s journey has only just begun!’. You don’t need to write that. It’s the editor’s job.” 

“...!!”

4. Get Serialized!! 

It’s just past noon. Noticing that the phone is ringing, Udai reaches out from under the futon. He checks, and realizes it’s Akaashi. He gets out of the futon in a hurry, and answers. 

“You were asleep.” Akaashi says, in the same straightforward tone. 

“...I’m sorry.” 

“No, I’m sorry too. I’m going to get into it. Your one-shot is well-received.” 

At those words, Udai’s hand begins to sweat. He had been told to make a one-shot for the extra issue, and had made “Zombie Knight Zombish” with everything he’d got. 

He had changed Zombish’s design into a young man with patchwork skin, after Akaashi’s critique. He likes the way the bandages show around his collar. It can’t have been a skeleton, he thinks. It’s hard to relate to a skeleton. 

The “recognizable by silhouette” task had been cleared with the axe on his head. The zombie knight element was incorporated, by making him detach his left arm to wield his sword. Maybe they’ll make a movable figure out of the character. 

Above all, it was a work he’d been confident in. If it had still been absolutely hopeless, Udai wouldn’t have been able to recover from it. 

“Thank god…” Udai feels the tension drain out of him, and Akaashi continues. 

“And now, I would like to brush up Zombish to prepare for serialization.” 

“Of course! With pleasure!” Udai answers with gusto, almost like an izakaya employee. 

“Firstly, your heroine.” 

“Yes!” 

I should probably fix up the heroine a bit more, Udai thinks. Make her cuter, better… But Akaashi doesn’t steer the conversation in that direction. 

“In the one-shot, Zombish saves her, and they decide to go on a journey together, and it ends there.” 

“Huh? Oh, yes.” 

“If the one-shot will be chapter one, are they going to be travelling together in chapter two and beyond?” 

It’s not anything fun, like about making the heroine have a good figure or about how revealing her clothes should be. 

And really, Udai hadn’t been thinking what would happen once it got serialized. Well, he supposes it would be like what Akaashi just said. 

“Wouldn’t the readers grow bored of that?” As if to read Udai’s mind, Akaashi says. 

“What?” 

“The main character and the heroine go on a journey together the whole time, an enemy appears, he saves her, he defeats the enemy, and then moves on. And they continue like that until the final boss.” 

“Yeah…” 

“Wouldn’t that bore people?” 

Wait, am I getting given out to? 

No, he’d only been thinking of the one-shot as a base, so he hadn’t set anything beyond that in stone. He had only thought that leaving the readers hoping for more would be enough. 

“...Um, if it’s possible, I’d like to talk about this in person.” Udai says, wiping the sweat off his palms with his t-shirt. 

“All right. When are you free?” 

And so, in the editorial department the day after, the brainstorming session in the meeting space had continued for more than two hours. 

“So then, instead of a heroine that just keeps getting saved…” 

“She’d be like a buddy that also gives witty comebacks.” 

Udai draws a bunch of expressions for the female character. Flustered, angry, glaring… He stops his pen, and looks at Akaashi. 

“Then maybe Zombish will have a goofy side, instead of just being cool?” 

“But please don’t make it into a gag manga. Looking at the survey results, there are a lot of people saying that the manga is interesting because Zombish is cool.” Akaashi answers, looking at the survey chart. 

“I see… Balancing it out is hard.” Udai draws out a bunch of Zombish’s expressions in his notebook, and laughs. “But it’s fun. It feels like I’m making a manga.” 

“It’s good to hear that.” Akaashi smiles for a moment, and continues. “And also, about the enemy. Instead of them being a group of bandits in the harsh world, making them an organization would add depth to the story.” 

“Oh, maybe they’re the reason Zombish turned into a zombie?” 

“Sounds good.” 

Udai’s mood lifts from Akaashi’s acknowledgement, and opens up a page earlier on in his notebook. 

“Look here! The final boss is a fated opponent from before Zombish turned into a zombie. And the heroine is a key person for Zombish to turn back into a human. So I thought right now, maybe the heroine is the daughter of the final boss.” 

In contrast to the excited Udai, Akaashi lets out a low groan of uncertainty. 

“...So what, exactly, is Zombish fighting for?” 

“You always ask questions that can make the whole thing fall apart, Akaashi-san.” 

“Well, isn’t that the most important part?” 

Expanding ideas simple-mindedly is fun. The more he expands, picking up the pieces and making the story coherent will be hell, though. But knowing that, talking about final bosses and rivals is genuinely fun. 

“Secret hideouts are great, aren’t they?” 

“If they’ve taken over this world, isn’t there no need to keep it a secret? Something that would display their power…” 

“A castle!”

7. Secret Technique: Bolster Up! 

Just after serialization, the response had been very good. It had been. Udai had been in a good mood, asking “This will definitely be turned into an anime, right?” 

But now, it had gotten to a point where they couldn’t let it get any lower on the survey rankings. 

“........” 

“Are you okay?” Akaashi’s senior sees him with his head in his hands, and speaks to him. 

“...Oh, yes.” 

“It’s about Zombish, right? You should bolster it up with something. Like, with a pretty girl or a handsome guy,” the senior says. “Well, I don’t know.” He returns to his seat, after saying his part. 

“Bolster it up…” 

Akaashi’s brows knit together. 

Would that be enough? Could such a hasty, superficial solution entertain the readers? Well, the current results point to the fact that they’re not entertained. But even so, shouldn’t they be charming the audience with the protagonist’s appeal, or how interesting the story is? 

“The protagonist’s appeal, huh…” 

But what are the features of a protagonist that will be loved? 

What kind of story makes the readers want to come back for more? 

“.....” 

It would be the anticipation the readers have for the main character. What will happen next week? What will he show us next? Expectations as such. There must have been a lack of absolute protagonist strength, if he thinks about it. 

But that was the result of trying to create a dark fantasy, painting a delicate picture of emotions. Precisely because it was an absurd world with a zombie knight appearing in it. Was that what they had done wrong? Was it impossible for his literature department-aspiring self to make an entertaining manga, after all…?

After pondering for a long time, Akaashi lifts his head with a start. 

“....!” 

Wait a minute. 

Am I making the same mistake again? 

Am I thinking I could control the author and the readers? 

“...No. Pour your spirit into each ball, pour your spirit into each ball…” 

Yes. Focus on the next point, the next ball. Focus on this week’s story, the obstacle the protagonist must overcome. 

His desk becomes messier each day, as if to reflect inside his heart. Akaashi closes his eyes, and focuses his mental state. 

“Don’t think about what’s easy, think about what’s fun. What’s fun…” 

The survey rankings going down, getting discontinued isn’t fun. Then what is he meant to do…?

“Give feedback… Connect it to the next step… The next…” 

The seniors look at Akaashi worriedly, in front of the printer. 

“Akaashi is muttering to himself again, is he okay? He won’t quit, will he?” 

“He always comes back to life afterwards, you can leave him alone.” 

“Yep.”

“I want an absolute, strong main character.” Akaashi says to Udai, during their meeting. 

“Absolute?” 

“Yes. Like a star that hits any ball with his utmost ability.” 

“Am I going to get discontinued?!” 

Udai stands up with a clatter, face growing pale. Akaashi shakes his head quietly. 

“...Please calm down. It’s not getting discontinued, yet.” 

“...Yet…” Udai shrinks, and sits back down. 

“It’s a tough situation, but let’s turn things around.” 

They’re burning their bridges behind them. 

On the walls around the meeting space, there are many posters of works that had been turned into anime and movies. And the cardboard boxes blocking the corridor are packed with samples of goods. 

They have to join the ranks of those popular works, at all cost…!

Akaashi brings his gaze back to Udai, and starts to summarize the things he had thought about for the past week. 

“The main character… Zombish is a ‘star’. The readers have expectations for the star. What will he do next? What awesome moves will he show us? What kind of crazy risks will he take?

“We want the main character to amaze us with unexpected, yet charming actions. Whether Zombish sinks or swims will depend on how he overcomes next week’s desperate situation.” 

Akaashi lifts the paper bag on the floor. “And there’s a favour I want to ask from you.” 

“What’s this? I was wondering about it for a while.” The paper bag handed to him is unexpectedly heavy. Udai glances inside. “A blu-ray?” 

“Yes. I picked out swashbuckler films of all types, that have useful scenes for composition and pose references. At this point, we should take in anything cool and flashy.” 

“Thank you!”

“Also, it will be hard for you to watch it all, so I wrote the times for scenes I want you to watch.” Akaashi gives him a note. 

“I’ll definitely watch it! I’ll use them as references!” 

“I’ll do anything I can as well. Let’s both try our best.” 

There’s no way Akaashi can control what story the author will bring to him, what the other works will be like, how the readers will react. 

So, he should think about what he can do, what he should do. 

Avoiding discontinuation— it’s hard, but it shouldn’t be impossible.

10. Our fight has only just begun! 

“Zombish is getting discontinued… You have seven chapters left…” 

After getting the phone call informing him of the discontinuation, Udai had gone outside. Staying in his room felt too painful. But why, and how he’d come to the editing department, he doesn’t remember. 

Akaashi had been taken aback, after Udai had come without contacting him. But one look at his face, and he knew he couldn’t leave him by himself. And so he had taken him to a nearby coffee shop to talk to him. It was just his luck that he hadn’t gone outside the company. 

“Please order anything you like.” 

Akaashi gives the menu to Udai sitting opposite to him, but Udai drops it onto the table, not having enough energy to hold it. 

Akaashi pulls the menu closer to himself, trying not to show his shock. “Is coffee all right, then?” 

“........” 

There’s no answer, but Akaashi asks for two cups of coffee from the waiter. He chooses his words carefully, and begins to speak. 

“We had unfortunate results this time, but…” Akaashi continues, to the dejected Udai. “And as a suggestion from me…”

“........”

“I would like to get a fresh start with a new work. We should solidify the concept more for your next work, and compete with a work only you can make.” 

“Next…?” Udai raises his head at last, only to slam it back into the table. “There’s nothing! There’s no such thing that only I can make!” He lifts his crumpled face, and yells. 

“That’s not true. There must be something…”

“It is too! There’s nothing!”

Akaashi can only bite his lip, while his assigned author descends into total panic. 

What should he do…

He can’t just say “Bye, then,” and leave him feeling downcast. He had wanted to part ways with him in a positive manner, connecting him to the next step. That might just be his own ego talking, though.

“...I’m sure there’s a good theme for you. Is there anything you liked as a child, or something you put your heart into?” 

“I’m just a jack-of-all-trades, average guy. I’ve just gotten by in regards to study, sports, art and music…” 

When Udai had been in good form, he had preened about it, saying “I can do pretty much anything!”, but now he’s totally dejected. Well, that can’t be helped. He’s getting discontinued, after all. 

The only thing Akaashi can do, is to tell him his completely honest thoughts. 

“I don’t think a serialized author is just a jack-of-all-trades, average person.” 

“I’m not a serialized author anymore, I’m a discontinued author…”

At that moment, the waiter arrives. He shows a slightly intrigued face at Udai’s words, but immediately puts on his professional face and turns on his heels. 

Akaashi takes the cup, and inhales the aroma of coffee to calm himself down. He thinks. Maybe he should make some small talk, and change the mood. 

What should he talk about? Not about his work, or about what lays ahead. Then, about Udai himself? He wonders what he had talked about with him recently. What club had he joined in college? Where was he from? 

And he remembers. 

“Udai-san, you told me before that you’re from Tohoku. Were there any unusual traditions there? That you can write a manga about.” 

“...Yeah, I’m from Miyagi. But I lived in a normal estate, it was all pretty normal.” 

Udai says with a hoarse voice, and absentmindedly puts sugar cubes into his coffee. Many, many sugar cubes. Akaashi thinks he’s adding a bit too much, but there’s an atmosphere around them that makes him unable to say that. 

“Well, maybe where I live is in the middle of nowhere in the countryside, to you. You’re from Tokyo, after all.” 

“That’s not…”

Akaashi thinks that Udai is getting a little too dejected with him, but he can’t be blamed. “Zombie Knight Zombish” is Udai’s first serialization, and his first discontinuation. 

Food, sleep… Udai had sacrificed such human necessities, and yet his work had not been well-received. Of course he would be dejected. 

And as a new employee, “Zombie Knight Zombish” was Akaashi’s first work that he had launched from nothing. Due to being emotionally invested in it, Akaashi had felt deeply disappointed about the decision made for Zombish. 

Which is exactly why he had wanted to end it on a positive note. Surely there’s something in common with them, that they can talk about…

Akaashi, feeling cornered, opens his mouth. And starts to talk about something unexpected, even to himself.

“...Actually, I have someone I know in Miyagi. It was in relation to the club I was in during high school.” 

“I see.” 

Udai stirs his coffee with lifeless eyes, not picking up the conversation at all. He doesn’t even drink the coffee that is surely too sweet. 

“........” 

Of course. Someone else’s high school years is the most irrelevant subject to Udai right now. But really, what should he do? Telling someone they’re being discontinued, and thinking of what happens afterwards, is a first for Akaashi. And it’s a big job. He isn’t sure what the correct thing to do is. 

Akaashi falls silent, and Udai opens his mouth. “...What club were you in, during high school?”  He asks, not sounding that interested. It feels more like he asked out of obligation, because there was a break in the conversation. 

Akaashi feels regret, after realizing he’s made Udai read the room for him. But at the same time, he feels relieved that some of Udai’s energy has come back. 

“Volleyball.” 

“I see. I did volleyball, too.” Udai says. “During my years, we went to the Spring High nationals, too.” 

At those words, Akaashi places the coffee he had lifted back onto the table. 

“Oh, me… too.” 

“Really?! That’s amazing, Akaashi-san!” 

“No, you too.” 

And with a light premonition, Akaashi asks. “...Which school did you attend in Miyagi?” 

“It’s not a powerhouse, so I don’t know if you’d know…” Udai laughs, before answering. “It’s called Karasuno.”

Please look forward to Udai-sensei’s next work, “Meteo Attack”! 

[leftonraed]

The Night We Met - Episode 1

pairing : Taehyung x OC genre : bodyguard!au, singleparent!au, idol!au word count : 2.4k summary — Taehyung gets terrible news and finds himself in a delicate situation

Prologue | ep.1 | ep.2 | ep.3 | ep.4 | ep.5 | ep.6 | ep.7 

The past month has been a complete blur. If you asked Taehyung to narrate the course of events after the moment he had been in charge of his niece, he wouldn’t be able to, especially when that small time frame included the one event he thought he’d never attend this quickly in his lifetime —

Hwiin got a little startled after he answered the door. While gauging his mood after several weeks of silence, she couldn’t take her eyes off the sullen man who seemed absent.

He was dressed in a dark suit. His hair was fully covering his eyes and had been dyed black, she was just at that moment able to notice it’d never been that long before.

The small heels of his shoes echoed loudly inside as he shuffled towards the living-room.

The gloomy winter sky, visible through the wide windows, narrowed the penthouse and gave the impression they lived in a black and white movie.

The shades of grey clashed unpleasantly with the barely audible cartoons displayed on the wide flat screen where Hina was sitting in front of. She hardly glanced Hwiin’s way.

She removed her purse and coat and put them on the couch while Taehyung kissed and whispered words to his niece. He didn’t get any response either. He stood up and joined Hwiin.

“I didn’t know how to do this-” he trailed softly as her eyes followed his hands feebly unfolding a paper with her eyes. He cleared his throat constricted with sorrow, “I wrote a couple of things down. If I forgot anything, send a text.”

She took it from him and realised she hadn’t said anything yet. What were you supposed to say in this situation, she wondered. The man she thought she knew so well almost struck her as a stranger and left her struggling for the right words.

Hwiin carefully looked up at him and felt her heart hurting at his sight. She should’ve been there for him those past weeks. She became angry with herself the longer she stared at his forlorn expression.

“Taehyung...” She hugged him tightly, as her way to make it up to him. He remained still. He didn’t want Hina to see him break down and cry.

“Thank you,” he only managed to whisper before she took a step back.

She quietly watched him walk out and never before had she felt a greater need to be by his side. She didn’t do anything of this sort.

She walked around the couch to sit next to the little girl she had been requested to look after for the day and tried to empty her mind. All she wanted was for this day to end.

So did he.  

___________________________________________

He didn’t seem present during the entirety of the funeral.

His parents, he used to be so close to but had drawn away from after his debut as an idol, didn’t even manage to make him say anything. They didn’t bother him about it and respected his own way of mourning the family loss.

Taehyung could sense his brother’s in-laws itching to ask him about Hina but held themselves.

While he made other attendees think he looked elsewhere and “too expressionless” in their opinion, he’d actually been doing his best to keep it to himself. He couldn’t tell what helped him hide his emotions, it was so unlike him but he had held steady.

He was right behind his home’s door when he heard Hina’s cries before he even walked in.

Worry instantly frowned his face as he found Hwiin holding the little girl in her arms, soothing her.

“She’s been crying the whole time since she woke up from her nap,” she informed him with a hint of despair. “I don’t know what to do anymore.”

Hina looked at him and he felt his feet naturally pulling him towards her when her arms stretched outward in his direction.

He held her closely and she tightened him to herself, burying her face in his neck.

He would never know for sure but she sounded grief-stricken and gave him the impression that he was the only one left capable of assuaging her.

Taehyung felt his legs give in and knelt down.

He was finally giving in.

Tears, held deeply back within, coursed down in an unbroken stream to dampen her dress. His body hiccoughed his ache so violently, it seemed it wanted to retaliate for the strains he’d inflicted himself.

Hwiin watched silently with sorrowful eyes as the two of them sought comfort in each other. She caught herself wondering if his niece somehow understood she’d never see her parents again.

__________________________________________

Taehyung never questioned his brother’s wish to have him take care of his daughter if something were to happen. He isn’t living the ideal kind of life to raise a toddler and there are many to criticize him about it, his manager being the first of them, but having Hina feels surprisingly right.

He’s grateful to have her keeping his mind off things but she also reminds him unintentionally of her father and the other way around will inevitably happen.

He sometimes ponders the doubts he has as a caretaker, unpleasant thoughts that come flooding his mind every time he’d fail doing the right thing or get rejected by her; he gives a chance to others scenarios playing out different outcomes but they never satisfy him.

He seeks comfort in the reality that he needs a lot of time to get better at it and that there’s no reason to rush. It’ll give him enough to make his mind about the way he’ll have to address their reality one day.

One of his priorities is to make sure his home has everything his niece would need. This meant visiting his brother’s empty house. Hwiin had asked him if he’d need her but he preferred to be on his own and planned not to linger longer than necessary.

__________________________________________

“You didn’t tell me what you’re planning to do about the few shows left,” Hwiin suddenly initiates, locking her phone.

Taehyung sighs when Hina whines at his umpteenth attempts to keep her from drawing on the wall. Defeated, he stands up to show his manager out.

“Did you hear from Seojun?”

“Nope. I sent him a text a few days ago. He never answers my calls.”

“I can’t see myself going anywhere with her. And I’m definitely not bringing her with me.”

It’s Hwiin’s turn to sigh, although she does it out of light exasperation. “What about my babysitter idea?”

“Out of question.” She lifts her head at his sudden firm tone. “I don't want her to be around strangers.”

“What will you do if you don’t hear from him anymore? Taehyung, you can’t stay at home indefinitely.”

“If I have no choice-” He cuts off himself. “I’m sure everyone will understand.”

She pinches her lips and cranes her neck up to stare somewhere in the empty hallway, keeping her calm.

Leaning on the hand he’s holding the door with, Taehyung tilts his head to glance at her with a hint of amusement.

“I’ll call him myself.”

She looks back at him and blinks slowly, thankful. They say their goodbyes and he closes the door.

When he comes back, Hina’s still putting the finishing touches to her art and Taehyung ponders the thought of throwing the felt tips away once she’s done with them.

He plops himself down on the couch and takes his phone out of his pocket. He quickly finds his bodyguard’s number and makes a phone call. The line rings once.

“Taehyung!”

“H-hi,” he answers, surprised at the man’s quick answer. “It’s been a while. How are you?”

“I’m happy you called! I’m doing really good. What about you?”

“I’m okay- I think.”

“I know you’ve heard it when we last talked but I’m really, really sorry.”

“Thank you. I’m doing okay, ‘promise.”

Seojun doesn’t need to see him to doubt his words but gives him the benefit of the doubt. He tries to change the subject, “How’s the little one doing?”

“Good…” Taehyung’s gaze is directed at Hina's long hair. “I still didn’t get one word from her though.”

“Don’t worry about it, she’ll talk when she’s ready. You shouldn’t force these things.”

Taehyung hums in thought. “How did your break go? How’s everyone ?”

“Very good. Everyone’s doing great.”

“Glad to hear that!” Taehyung smiles a lazy grin and remembers the purpose of his call. “Seojun, I’m sorry I bring this a little abruptly but- when do you think you’ll be coming back? Hwiin told me she tried to contact you-”

“Ah yes,” he suddenly exclaims. “I actually wanted to talk to you directly.”

Amused, Taehyung’s brows furrow slightly. “Right.”

“I’ve never liked the way she looked down on people. But you do well to bring that up.”

He frowns a little more, anticipating.

“I… I don’t think I’ll be coming back anytime soon, Taehyung.” There’s a short pause. “I've been thinking about it lately and we’ve talked a lot with my wife… The fact is that- my family misses me and I miss them.”

Taehyung doesn’t know what to say immediately, “I’m sorry to hear that... But I understand.”

“Really? It’s just that- they’ve barely seen me the past six years and I thought maybe I needed to extend that break for a little longer while.” Seojun feels terrible now that he’s brought the news. As if the death of his brother wasn’t enough of a change.

“I totally do- I just- I don’t know what to do to keep working and look after my niece at the same time. I mean, th- there’s no one else I trust equally to look after her when I can’t.”

“I know and I’ve made sure you guys wouldn’t be left hanging.” He’s quick to reply, “I found someone to take over. Your agency’s already abreast of it. They’re okay to hire that person but they told me they wouldn’t make any decision until they get your last word.”

“Can you tell me more about him?”

“It’s actually a woman, she’s around your age. She’s attended the same security school I did and was the top of her class. I know her personally and was the one who offered to take the helm. I wouldn’t recommend anyone else to stand in for me.”

Taehyung would never doubt Seojun. They regard each other as family, so if Seojun trusted that woman enough to take charge of his responsibilities, he wouldn’t question him further.

“Okay.”

And it’s not like he could think of a better solution to tell Hwiin.

Seojun is relieved when he hears his answer, however he can feel he doesn’t seem totally convinced.

“I promise you, you won’t miss me once she starts.”

___________________________________________

“Hina,” complains Taehyung. “Why are you being so difficult? I thought you liked mashed carrots.”

He’s helpless and covered in what once has been her lunch. She’s on the verge of crying and shaking her legs, irritated. Her arm sways her small plate and Taehyung catches it before she makes an even bigger mess. She starts whining loudly.

“One second,” he mutters while cleaning her stained face before standing up to take her out of the high chair. She stops crying and leaves to watch cartoons still on T.V.

“I’ll go change. I’ll be in the bedroom,” he announces like he doesn’t know he’ll be ignored and leaves.

The doorbell rings a couple of minutes after, taking both Taehyung and Hina by surprise.

Seeing her uncle nowhere around, she stands up to totter toward the entrance holding onto her soft toy. Taehyung just got rid of his dirty clothes when he decides to come out only dressed in a pair of red boxers, remembering he’s expecting Hwiin to come by.

He finds Hina trying to reach for the handle, perched on her tippy-toes.

“Let me help you,” he smiles lightly at her when he looks down, seeing her small face after she craned her neck to the fullest. He taps in the security code and opens and she hurries to push it wide open.

“Hello.”

Hina walks to go behind him at the sight of a stranger. There’s a short silent while that lasts awfully long the second Taehyung understands he’s in his underwear and that he doesn’t recognize you.

“You’re not Hwiin,” he trails quietly.

You shake your head looking back at him very calmly.

From the corner of your eye, you notice his niece hiding behind his leg, peeking shyly at you. You squat at her level and blood rushes up Taehyung’s cheeks.

“You’re Hina, right?” You look at her. “This is for you.”

He pulls himself together. “You didn’t have to,” he chuckles abashed.

His niece stares at the toy piano you offer her. You press one key to make a sound and lit it up in hopes to get her pleased with it.

Taehyung can’t help but think a gift is the last thing she deserves after the tantrum she threw just minutes ago. “Say thank you, Hina.”

She carefully takes it from you and there’s a hint of a satisfied smile on your lips.

“Who’s Hwiin?” You gaze up at Taehyung.

Shit. You need to get up. He needs to put on some clothes, he thinks.

“My manager. Are you-”

“Y/N, your new bodyguard.” You straighten up with your hands behind you.

“Taehyung. Nice to meet you.” He feels Hina, pulling the hem of his boxers and swiftly takes her in his arms. She keeps an iron grip on the toy. “Uh- Please, come in.”

You step inside when he moves away and closes the door behind you. He stares at you as you take a look around, surprised you remain unaffected by his lack of clothing but still thinks it’s not the appropriate way he should have welcomed you in.

“I’m sorry about the mess, I didn’t know you’d come home so early.” He explains as he puts down Hina. “Make yourself at home. ‘Be right back.”

You watch him disappear without a word, his niece follows him while gazing curiously at you. You bring your eyes back on the splendid view the penthouse overlooks.

When Taehyung comes back, closely followed, you’re still standing nearby the window. He’s intrigued and curious as to what made you so special in Seojun’s eyes.

///////////////////////!\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Feedback very much appreciated  Reblog if you wish to read more

[altair-native]

My Top 10 Albums of 2020

Now that the longest and craziest year in history is finally over, I figured now would be a good time to reflect and look back at some positive things from 2020. Despite concerts and tours being cancelled, and many bands and artists postponing albums due to not being able to promote them, there was a lot of really fantastic music released this year. Here are some of my favorites!

Honorable Mention: Money Money 2020 Part II by The Network

Green Day members Billie Joe Armstrong, Mike Dirnt, and Tré Cool (plus some friends) brought back an old side project from 2003 this year called The Network. This album is a follow up to their debut album Money Money 2020, and was a huge surprise. I wasn’t sure where to put it on my top 10 list, but I still wanted to talk about it because it ended up being much better than the actual Green Day record we got this year. They experiment with lots of different sounds on this album, and while some of them are definitely meant to be satire, there are some seriously great songs on here that give me hope that future Green Day albums could be much better.

Favorite Song: Fentanyl

Now, on to the top 10:

#10 Last Room by waveform*

The first of many surprise additions to the list, Last Room is a really great album stocked full of songs that are all pretty short, but each stands out on its own. waveform* is really good at making songs that capture the listener’s attention. This is definitely a band that I want to hear more of, and I’m excited to dive deeper into their discography this year! 

Favorite Song: Miner’s Lullaby

   #9 Petals For Armor by Hayley Williams

After years of being in Paramore, Hayley Williams has finally released her first solo album! Paramore’s 2017 album After Laughter experimented with lots of different sounds, and was also a very personal record lyrically, so it’s no surprise that Hayley took a similar approach here. These songs are a way for her to open up about her life and branch out more and she succeeds on this record. Even if you’re not a fan of Paramore I highly recommend checking this one out.

Favorite Song: Why We Ever

   #8 Some Still Morning by Handsome Ghost

I’ve already talked a bit about this album (it was even my first review on this blog!) but I feel like the more I’ve listened to it, the more I’ve started to love the songs that first stuck out to me. I still feel like some of the songs sound a bit too similar, but when the duo branch out and try new things on this record, it’s some of their best work.

Favorite Song: Christmas In Jersey

   #7 Healer by Grouplove

Something that has always been true about Grouplove’s music is that it is insanely catchy, and this holds true with their newest record Healer. I’ve liked a lot of their music before, but for some reason this album connected with me on a way that their other music hasn’t. I feel like this album came out at the perfect time for me, because it has a lot of themes about growing up and dealing with the crazy world we live in. If you’ve never listened to Grouplove and want to check them out, I think that Healer is definitely a good starting place.

Favorite Song: Hail to the Queen

   #6 Folklore by Taylor Swift 

I’ve had a history of really disliking Taylor Swift’s music, especially her earlier albums. I guess for those it was due to overexposure, but with some of her more recent albums (especially 2013′s Red) I actually found there were certain songs I actually liked. Her albums as a whole, however, have always felt bogged down by their singles which often don’t sound like they fit with the rest of the album. When I heard she had announced an album coming out that night, I was very curious. After listening to it, Folklore fixed every issue I’ve had with her previous albums, and I love how she’s shifted her lyrics to focus on telling stories. I didn’t expect a Taylor Swift album to end up on my top 10 list for any year, but 2020 was definitely full of surprises!

Favorite Song: Seven

  #5 Possession by Joywave

I had discovered Joywave one day on YouTube by accident, and immediately wanted to hear more from them. Their songs are always so unique and creative, and after seeing them open up for Bastille in October 2019, I got really excited for their third album. They have incredible energy on stage, and that energy is reflected perfectly in their music, especially on this album. It was one of my most anticipated records of 2020, and it seriously lived up to the hype.

Favorite Song: Half Your Age

   #4 Figure by Into It. Over It

Yet another accidental discovery, Figure blew me away the first time I listened to it. I was immediately drawn in from the first track, and each song delivers something truly special. I had to listen to this album all the way through multiple times to really take it all in. I planned on doing a full review of it here, but felt I needed to look into the lyrics and the meanings behind the songs a little more to fully understand it. Now, Into It. Over It has been on repeat for a good chunk of the past couple months.  Evan Thomas Weiss is an incredible songwriter and really talented musician, and I seriously recommend checking out his music.

Favorite Song: Brushstrokes

   #3 Leave What’s Lost Behind by Colony House

Colony House are a band that I discovered a few years ago, and their first two albums quickly became favorites of mine.Their intriguing instrumentals along with Caleb Chapman’s powerful vocals make their music really fun to listen to, and like Joywave they put on a fantastic show even when they’re just the opening act. I had been looking forward to the follow up to 2017′s Only The Lonely, and this record definitely lived up to my expectations, even if I prefer the latter album a little more. There are definitely some incredible songs here, a few of which are among the best in Colony House’s discography.

Favorite Song: The Hope Inside

#2 Zeros by Declan McKenna

For whatever reason, I didn’t listen to this album when it first came out, but when I did eventually get around to listening to it I fell in love. Declan McKenna has always been a really great songwriter, but this album in particular shows just how talented the 22 year old singer is. Blending sounds from different eras of rock along with some more modern production, Zeros is an absolute masterpiece of an album.

Favorite Song: Twice Your Size

   #1 Dreamland by COIN

Even though Zeros got really close to taking the number one spot, my personal favorite of the year is still COIN’s third album Dreamland (not to be confused with the Glass Animals album of the same name also from 2020). COIN is a band that just keeps on getting better, and even after losing a member back in 2018, they’ve still managed to grow and improve their sound. Dreamland takes everything I’ve loved about COIN’s music and adds to it. If you haven’t listened to this album and are a fan of indie pop bands like Flor, Smallpools and Young the Giant, then you should definitely give this album a listen!

Favorite Song: Nobody’s Baby

   Thank you for checking out my list of my favorite albums from this past year! I’d love to know what you guys think and if we have any of the same albums on our list :)

[kpopfanfictrash]

Hi Shanna! I really liked how detailed and technical ur dance ranking of twice was--as someone who has no formal dance experience, it was enlightening. Would u mind doing one for bts? Only if u want to of course :)

Hello! I have a few of these in my inbox, so yes! I will do this one for bts (but then I must stop before this becomes my blog LOL). I’ll give the same caveats I gave for Twice, though. 1) Dance is always somewhat subjective because it’s an art form. I can talk about technique, but at a certain point my favorite dancer might not be someone else’s favorite dancer because of performance quality, and 2) ALL OF BTS ARE GREAT DANCERS! You don’t become a professional performance artist without already being head and shoulders above the rest. At the end of the day, all are fantastic. 

NOTE: Please don’t use my words on any other platform/to respond to the boys. I’m posting only to give some insight to their skills, not to try and critique BTS. They have dance coaches, trainers and choreographers for that. They absolutely do not need some random person on the internet telling them what they should be doing.

With that in mind, here are my personal thoughts/loose ranking of bts at dancers:

1. Jimin. Not that I’m biased. LOL but seriously, part of the reason I’m drawn to Jimin is because he’s such a fantastic performer. With dance, a lot of people think it’s just body type which can make or break a dancer. To some extent, this is true. If you aren’t born with amazing arches, turnout or flexibility, there’s only so much you can do to improve. That said, there’s a certain intrinsic performance quality which also can’t be taught. You either have it, or you don’t and Jimin has it. It’s mesmerizing to watch him on stage. He has such fantastic control when he dances; his execution of choreography is flawless, but he also puts his own spin on things without standing out too much (a bad thing, when you’re dancing as part of a group!) Jimin does have a background in contemporary/ballet,  which is different from Hobi. One of the places this is visible is in how grounded Jimin is with his transitions/how he finishes his movements. This is SUPER dorky of me lmao, but one of my favorite moves I’ve ever seen him do is this roll up from the ground at 2:05. The absolute CONTROL Jimin has; his heels don’t move an inch, which is so hard to do. Another impressive move to me was the jump Jimin did in the Dynamite dance break (1:09). Neil Haskell did this freaking move all the time on SYTYCD lmao, and it was a staple “trick” on the dance circuit for years, because it’s hard and requires a gymnast/martial arts background. LOTS of control and complicated timing. I could honestly go on for pages about Jimin’s performance quality, but I’ll stop and say one other thing. I occasionally see people praising Jimin as an amazing contemporary dancer (on par with professional contemporary dancers), and I do think it’s important to clarify Jimin diverged from that path nearly ten years ago to become an Idol dancer. Those are two very different styles of dance and although Jimin is FANTASTIC, it’s okay for him not to be the best at every single dance style! lol he’s the first one to say (because he has, while watching the black swan orchestral video) he couldn’t do some of the things professional contemporary dancers can do. (I will add though, yoongi is also right in that I have full faith Jimin COULD have done those things, had he chosen to pursue that path). ANYWAYS. I’ve rambled enough about how much I love Jimin. ONWARD!

2. Hoseok. Surprise, surprise! LOL okay, so let me start by saying out of all BTS, Hoseok is what I consider the smartest dancer. What I mean by that is, the man never burns out. He knows when to conserve his energy and when to go all out. Hoseok is the master of rise and fall in intensity, and there’s a reason he’s highly regarded by all dancers in the industry. Hoseok also seems to have a choreographer’s mind, whereas you don’t see this as much with Jimin. To clarify, being a dancer and being a choreographer are two separate things. It’s like being a soccer player versus being a coach. Being a choreographer requires a big-picture mentality not all dancers have. Hoseok has this though, and you can see this in the natural leadership role he takes whenever they’re rehearsing on their own. He sees mistakes, fixes transitions, etc. (it’s hot, but I digress). Hoseok has a background in various styles of hip-hop, which is really clear when he freestyles. He’s demonstrated popping, tutting, locking and more, which you really only learn through rigorous hip-hop training. His MMA 2019 solo is WILD because he showcases like, five different styles all within a minute. They’re all sub-genres of a genre (hip-hop), if that makes sense. He doesn’t have the same contemporary background as Jimin, which is somewhat apparent whenever BTS leans into more contemporary styles (spring day, black swan, etc). Hobi is good, don’t get me wrong, but his spot isn’t as natural, he’s not as flexible and sometimes you see him overthinking movements. But anyways, Hoseok fancams are the BEST. Go watch one today.

3. Jungkook. Jungkook has improved SO. MUCH. Y’ALL. I can’t stress this enough! A lot of BTS fans probably remember Big Hit sent Jungkook to LA for a few months prior to debut to get him to loosen up in his dancing/improve his performance quality, and boy did he ever. Overall, I think Jungkook’s biggest strengths are his 1) endless stamina (wtf lol) and 2) lately, performance quality. When I’m talking about stamina, I mean Jungkook always goes full-fucking-out in performances and it catches the audience’s eye. One example which comes to mind was during MMA 2019 Dionysus. If you start at like, 2:10, BTS does this really exhausting floor part and then you see everyone around him conserving their energy as they move into the next chorus. It’s supposed to be a breather in the choreo lmao but Jungkook is FULL OUT. It’s his intensity and strength which really makes him stand out as a dancer. If I had written this a year ago, I would’ve said Jungkook’s biggest weakness is contemporary dance. The flip side of the coin to being strong is it can be difficult to slow things down and display the same intensity with slower music. Then, he went and did Black Swan. Like... just watch this spring day performance and contrast it with this black swan one for jungkook. He has gotten SO MUCH BETTER at staying grounded, moving through his transitions, instead of rushing past them to get to the next step. I’m just really proud of him. I still think hobi + jimin have a leg up on him, but Jungkook is a close third.

4. Taehyung. When you get to Taehyung + Yoongi, things start to get blurry. But since this is a list of my personal preferences, I’m going to put Taehyung first because for me, performance is everything. In my opinion, Taehyung’s performance quality is second only to Jimin. More immature dancers will often refer to performance as “making faces.” I.e., purse your lips on count five, smile on count 8 and frown on count 1. A mature dancer though, knows dancing is really an extension of acting. You need to embody the emotions of the song and convey them to your audience, and not just through your facial expressions! I think Tae does a really great job of this, and I’ll often watch his fancams, even though his dance technique isn’t as strong as say, Jimin or Hobi. That’s Taehyung’s main weakness, in my opinion. If he’d started dancing at an earlier age, or taken ballet/contemporary.... lord, idk LOL. help us all.  

5. Yoongi. THIS MAN! Used to be a b-boy and the background is crystal clear if you’ve ever watched a Yoongi fancam (and if you haven’t, what are you doing with your life?) There’s an effortless quality to his movement and, when he wants to, his strength + performance quality rival Jungkook or Taehyung. That said, I think the main reason I’m not ranking Yoongi above them is consistency. Yoongi, simply put, isn’t a dancer. He’s a rapper/producer who likes to dance and enjoys dancing as part of BTS. I’m not saying he doesn’t like it, but it’s not his main passion, unlike some of the others. His intensity can vary depending on his visibility, which again, isn’t a bad thing. When Yoongi does turn it on, he turns it ON. He’s also very comfortable onstage, which is important. Yoongi doesn’t hesitate in his improv (esp. in his solos or rap line performances), which gives his stage quality a more natural ease.  

6/7. Namjoon + Seokjin. I honestly don’t know who I would put as seventh; it’s hard to pick. And again, I don’t consider either of them to be bad dancers. It’s just when you have a group of people and some have prior dance experience/a strong passion for dance, and some don’t... it is what it is! I will say I think both Seokjin and Namjoon have grown tremendously over the past years. They’ve become so much more comfortable onstage, and it really shows in their performance quality. Sometimes, being confident you won’t look stupid is half the battle LOL. The other thing I’ll say is their execution of choreography is always down pat. You’ll rarely see either one messing up the steps, which means they practice a LOT. Sure, there are areas where their technique could be improved. Quality of transitions, staying grounded through difficult moves, always using their spot on turns... but I think it’s amazing that, despite their lack of formal dance training, they both keep up with some of the above dancers. Like... fuck it up, guys. 

and that’s all! thank you for reading if you made it this far LOL WOO, BTS!

[addictedtomanga]

Shoujo manga recommendations - living together/neighbors

1.      Konyakusei 

Sachi Hanaoka has just lost her parents to a traffic accident and her fear of living alone becomes reality. To add on to her troubles, Kouichi Saonji, the young landlord of her apartment, approaches her and requests that she prepare to vacate since she is now be unable to pay rent. Alternatively, Kouichi proposes a solution: he and Sachi will get married and she will act as his caretaker. Not only will her expenses be covered, but it would also serve as a method to quell his family's nagging for him to find a wife. Despite the lack of genuine feelings between them, Sachi finds herself drawn to Kouichi and accepts his offer. But will the newly wed couple be able to fall in love, or will they remain strangers forever?

2.      Sugar Family 

Since Yuuka's mother died at an early age, Yuuka turned out to be the one taking care of her child-like father. Right before high school started, Yuuka's dad announced his remarriage with Satou Masami. Masami-san turned out to be a reliable, responsible person, so Yuuka finally thought she's off the hook. That is, until she finds out about her new older brother...

3.      Kyou mo Uchi de Machi Awase

After a fire, a middle-aged man meets a homeless single mother and her son at the convenience store. He is instantly reminded of someone he used to know over a decade ago. Could it be...?

4.      Kyoudai Gokko 

Growing up, Rio Takara has always wanted siblings. So when her parents decide to move overseas without her and tells her she will be living with two people around her age, she's cautiously optimistic. But they turn out to be brothers who fight like cats and dogs. Is this what having siblings is like?

5.      Kamiki Kyoudai Okotowari

Iroha was raised by her single mother, but when her mother remarries, they move in with her step-father and his 3 sons. To Iroha, this will be the first time she's living with men. What will happen to Iroha's new life!?

6.      Monokuro Shounen Shoujo 

Kureha Mimachi, a 15-year-old girl, has just transferred into Shiritsu Kenhono High School. However, there is something weird about this school, it is actually a school where the Princes and Princesses of the beast-kind go to...?! Even though Kureha is human, she is there as a way to help the students their lives peacefully with humans and has the role as the "rabbit". Will she be able survive without being eaten by the students...?!

7.      Mademoiselle Butterfly 

Our heroine is a girl who lives as a geisha in Japan. She has a male childhood friend who's always been kind to her and is her favorite. He's a painter, only he paints on human body parts, and she loves it when he paints beautiful butterflies on her arms. She goes to visit him one day and finds a naked woman lying in his room. Immediately after, she gets a customer who's rich and very interested in her. The thought of being away from her friend pains her, but is everything really too late?

8.      Mayonaka Lolita 

After she took some medicines, Michiryuu became suddenly a little girl. People used to say that she was really perfect. That's why she wants to came back to normal quickly. But the only condition if she wants that happen is to find "a personn she'll love". But that's completely impossible for her! So what will happen to Michiryuu...?

9.      Mayonaka ni Kiss 

Natori Nono is a very tough school-girl, she lives with her widowed mother Ayame and her younger brother Takumi in a very small apartment, where she does all the chores. Her boyfriend wants money from her, because he's really poor, too. But one day, Nono discovers that her mother remarried! She married Ichijou Hayato, the owner of the 'Ichijou Group'. Now, Nono lives there (in unaccustomed riches) with her mother, her brother, her stepfather AND her new stepbrother: Ichijou Kasuomi (his father calls him Omi-kun)!!! At first, Nono thinks Kasuomi is not nice. But what will happen next?

10.  Harem Lodge 

Midori lost her mother when she was young and now her father's gone too. But her dad left her with a surprise: a fiancé named Tetsuya. So now, Midori has to live in a good-looking men only apartment (Harem Lodge), which is actually filled with weirdos. What is going to happen to her? Well we just have to wait and see...

11.  Hyakujuu no ou ni Tsugu!

This is the liberated area where you listen to girls will, a girls high school! in this class, there's a king. Me, Yuka! My friends are counting on me and boys are afraid of me! But that kind of paradise will suddenly break up by a thirty-year old man!! dates will take place in golf areas and kisses will have the taste of smoke...

12.  Last Notes 

Haru and Aki are the masters of the branch store - an old-looking and very unusual shop. It sells only one thing: a special kind of incense that, when burned, allows the user to see and speak with the spirit of the dead person that appears in the smoke. Every customer has a different reason for calling up the dead, and how they use this unusual opportunity is up to them...

13.  Hapira Hajimaru 

Asai Sachi's luck has always been considered dreadful. After becoming the class president, she meets Kurono Hyougo, a guy with a frightful face who bears various gruesome rumours behind his back. Hyougo had been living alone in an apartment; but when Sachi mistakenly reveals that Hyougo is a minor, he had to be kicked out. Fortunately, Sachi's father is a realtor, and suggested to have Hyougo live in their unused detached house. Would Sachi's bad luck turn upside down upon meeting Hyougo?

14.  Hana o Meshimase

After Shion's mother passed away, she was left with her father who loves to gamble and evade his responsibilities as a father. Due to that continuous pattern, Shion moves in to live as a live-in employee with 25-years-old florist Shun Mamyuuda. As she begins to learn the value of flowers and life, will she also find her place in love?

15.  Good Morning Call 

Nao Yoshikawa stays behind to live by herself when her parents leave to inherit her grandpa's farm in the country. On the day she moves into her new apartment she soon discovers that it was rented also to Hisashi Uehara—a cute, super-cool and popular guy from her school. Not only did their housing agency unexpectedly close down, the landlord of the apartment tells them that they had to pay more for their apartment then they had expected. With both no money and no home to return to, Nao and Hisashi decide to live together as flatmates.

16.  Nanako Robin 

Yoshino Nako has a saying. "If I'm happy, I can do anything!" In her sister's place, Nako-chan steals the groom of an arranged (political) marriage and helps them elope. But when the Hayami group starts failing, she must pay the consequence by housing the delinquent brother...

17.  Momo Raba 

Chieri (Cherry) was living an ordinary life, until her sister Ichigo (Strawberry) suddenly left her child Momo (Peach) on Chieri's doorstep. Momo is an infant; how is Chieri supposed to take care of a baby while still in high school!? To make matters even more frustrating, two guys are fighting for Chieri's love...!

18.  Men’s Life 

Mio's life is changed in a big way due to an encounter with Rin, an upperclassman who is one-year-older, and...!?

19.  Tonari wa Nani o Kuu Hito zo 

Inaba Suzuna is trying her best to make a campus debut and to have many friends in Tokyo. Until she realized that she miserably fails at living alone. Fortunately, her neighbor, Seto, comes and saves her from dying of starvation. Bright campus life is still far away for Suzuna, but at least, she has a very dependable neighbor!

20.  Yumemiru Taiyou

While loitering in the park, Shimana Kameko, who intended to run away from home and skip school, meets a suspicious man in a kimono. This man, who had been locked out of his house, offers Shimana a place to stay. However, he requests she fulfill three conditions in exchange for her tenancy!?

21.  Taiyou no Ie 

After her mother abandoned her and her father remarried, high schooler Mao Motomiya is left feeling like she doesn't have a place where she belongs. One night, her childhood friend Hiro Nakamura finds her in a shrine eating cheap convenience store food and offers to take her to a restaurant. Their subsequent heart to heart leads to Hiro suggesting that Mao move in with him. To Hiro who has lived apart from his younger siblings all these years after their parents passed away, bringing his family back together in the once-lively Nakamura home begins with the first step of giving Mao a loving place to belong. When Mao reluctantly accepts his invitation, she is surprised at how easy it is to settle in with her longtime friend. Now she must deal not only with mending her relationship with her father and helping the oldest Nakamura brother attain his goal, but also her growing feelings for Hiro.

22.  Tsubaki-chou Lonely Planet 

Oono Fumi is a poor second year high school student. Because of her father's debts, she's kicked out of her own home and has to rely on her own connections to survive. Thus begins her life as a live-in housekeeper for a reclusive writer...

23.  Faster than a kiss

Losing their parents, Fumino and her brother hop from one relative to another. Getting tired of all those movings, she finally decides to quit school and work to support her brother on her own. As they sat on a park bench, her teacher appears in front of her and agrees to her demanding of marrying and supporting both her and her brother!! Is he serious or just playing around...!?

24.  Kiss/Hug 

Ryuu, a super-business-like transfer student from England with black hair and blue eyes just arrived! During the night of the Tanabata festival, Ryuu and Yukino became attracted to each other at first sight. He then declares, "You will be mine!" This brought confusion to Yukino, who has zero experience in love. But could she actually be falling in love?

25.  Kanna to Decchi 

Our heroine Kanna is the daughter of the famous builder in town. One day a boy with a hammer appears to train under Kanna's father?! The heart pounding love story of a handsome apprentice carpenter.

26.  Sabaku no Harem 

Mishe a strong willed girl raised from poverty has caught Prince Kallum's attention. Attention as in, "you will become one of my concubines," thus begins Mishe's adventures into Prince Kallum's world.

[thekillerssluts]

The Story Behind Every Song On Will Butler’s New Album Generations

Will Butler has a lot on his mind. It has, after all, been five years since his solo debut, Policy. A lot can happen in half a decade, and a lot has happened in this past half-decade — much of it quite dire. Butler was in his early 30s when Policy came out, and now he’s closing in on 40. He’s a husband and father. And he’s shaken by the state of the world, the idea of being an artist and a soon-to-be middle-aged man striving to guide his family through the chaos.

At least, that’s how it comes across through much of Generations, his sophomore outing that arrives today. Generations is a big, sprawling title by nature, and the album in turn grapples with all kinds of big picture anxieties. Mass shootings, the overarching darkness and anxiety of our time, trying to reckon with our surroundings but the system overload that occurs all too easily in the wake of it. Then there are more intimate songs, too, tales drawn from personal lives as people plug along just trying to navigate a tumultuous era.

Butler is, of course, no stranger to crafting music that seeks to parse the cultural moment and how it impacts in our daily lives. Ever since Arcade Fire ascended to true arena-rock status on The Suburbs 10 years ago, they have embarked on projects that explicitly try to make sense of our surroundings. (Not that their earlier work was bereft of heavy concepts — far from it — but Reflektor and Everything Now turned more of a specific eye towards contemporary ills and trials.) But as one voice amongst many in Arcade Fire, there is a cinematic scope to whatever Butler’s playing into there.

On Generations, he engages with a lot of similar concerns but all in his own voice — often yelping, desperate, frustrated then just trying to catch a breath. Butler leans on his trusty Korg MS-20 throughout Generations, often giving the album a synth-y indie backdrop that allows him to try on a few different selves. There are a handful of surging choruses, “la-la” refrains batting back against the darkness, slinking grooves maybe allowing someone the idea of brief physical release amidst ongoing strife.

Ahead of Generations’ arrival, Butler sent us some thoughts on the album, running from inspiration between the individual tracks to little details about the arrangement and composition of different songs. Now that you can hear the album for yourself, check it out and read along with Butler’s comments below.

1. “Outta Here”

I think this is the simplest song on the record. Just, like, get me out of here. Get me fucking out of here. I’m so tired of being here. No, I don’t have another answer, and I don’t expect anything to be better anywhere else. But, please, I would like to leave here.

I can play plenty of instruments, and can make interesting sounds on them, but kinda the only instrument I’m good at is a synth called the Korg MS-20. That’s the first sound on the record. It makes most of the bass you hear on the record. It’s a very aggressive, loud, versatile machine, and I wanted to start the record with it cause I’m good at playing it and it makes me happy.

2. “Bethlehem”

This song partly springs from “The Second Coming” by William Butler Yeats:​ “What rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?” Like a lot of folks, I woke up after the election in 2016 mad and sad and scared and exhausted. This song is born of that emotion.

My bandmates Jenny Shore, Julie Shore, and Sara Dobbs sing the bridge, and it’s a corrective to my (appropriate?) freaking out — this isn’t the apocalypse. You’re misquoting Yeats. Get your fucking head on straight. History has not ruptured — this shit we’re in is contiguous with the shit we’ve been dealing with for a long, long time. But still, we sometimes do need an apocalyptic vision to make change. Even if it’s technically wrong. I dunno. It’s an ongoing conversation.

There’s a lot of interplay with backing vocals on this record — sometimes the narrator is the asshole, sometimes the backing vocals are the asshole. Sometimes they’re just trying their best to figure out the world. This song starts that conversation.

3. “Close My Eyes”

I tried to make these lyrics a straightforward and honest description of an emotion I feel often: “I’m tired of waiting for a better day. But I’m scared and I’m lazy and nothing’s gonna change.” Kind of a sad song. Trying to tap into some Smokey Robinson/Motown feeling — “I’ve got to dance to keep from crying.”

There’s a lot of Mellotron on this record, and a lot of MS-20. This song has a bunch of Mellotron strings/choirs processed through the MS-20. It’s a trick I started doing on the Arcade Fire song “Sprawl II,” and I love how it sounds and I try to do it on every song if I can.

4. “I Don’t Know What I Don’t Know”

This makes a pair with “Close My Eyes” — shit is obviously fucked, but “I don’t know what I don’t know what I don’t know what I can do.” I’m not a proponent of the attitude! Just trying to describe it, as I often feel it. In my head, I know some things that I can do — my wife Jenny, for instance, works really hard to get state legislatures out of Republican control. Cause it’s all these weirdo state legislative chambers that have enormous power over law enforcement, and civil rights, and Medicaid, and everything.

The image in the last verse was drawn from the protests in Ferguson in 2015: “Watch the bullets and the beaters as they move through the streets — grab your sister’s kids — hide next to the fire station…” It’s been horrifically disheartening to see the police riot across America as their power has been challenged. I’ve got a little seed of hope that we might change things, but, man, dark times.

More MS-20 bass on this one, chained to the drum machine. This one is supposed to be insanely bass heavy — if it comes on in a car, the windows should be rattling, and you should be asking, “What the heck is going on here?” Trying for a contemporary hip-hop bass sound but in a way less spare context. First song with woodwinds — rhythmic stuff and freaky squeals by Stuart Bogie and Matt Bauder.

5. “Surrender”

This song is masquerading as a love song, but it’s more about friendship. About the confusion that comes as people change: Didn’t you use to have a different ideal? Didn’t we have the same ideal at some point? Which of us changed? How did the world change? Relationships that we sometimes wish we could let go of, but that are stuck within us forever.

It’s also about trying to break from the first-person view of the world. “What can I do? What difference can I make?” It’s not about some singular effort — you have to give yourself over to another power. Give over to people who have gone before who’ve already built something — you don’t have to build something new! The world doesn’t always need a new idea, it doesn’t always need a new personality. What can you do with whatever power and money you’ve got? Surrender it over to something that’s already made. And then the song ends with an apology: I’m sorry I’ve been talking all night. Just talk talk talking, all night. Shut up, Will.

Going for “wall of sound” on this one — bass guitar and bass synth and double tracked piano bass plus another piano plus Mellotron piano. The “orchestra” is about a dozen different synth and Mellotron tracks individually detuned. And then run through additional processing.

6. “Hide It Away”

This song is about secrets. Both on an intimate, heartbreaking level — friends’ miscarriages, friends’ immigration status, shitty affairs coming to light — and on a grand, horrible level: New York lifting the statute of limitations on child abuse prosecutions, all the #MeToo reporting. There’s nothing you can do when your secret is revealed. Like, what can you do? You just have to let the response wash over you. If you’ve done something horrible, god-willing, you’ll have to pay for it in some way. If it’s something not horrible, but people will hate you anyway, goddammit, I wish there were some way to protect you.

This song has the least poetic line on the record, a real clunker: “It’s just money and power, money and power might set them free.” But it’s a clunky, shitty concept — the most surefire protection is being rich and knowing powerful people. But even then, shit just might come out. Even after you’re long dead.

Came from a 30-second guitar sample I recorded while messing around at the end of trying to track a different song. I liked the chords, looped them to make a demo. And the song was born from there. This is the one song I play drums on. Snare is chained to the MS-20, trying to play every frequency the ear can hear at the same time on some of those big hits.

7. “Hard Times”

[Laughs] I sat down and tried to write a Spotify charting electro-hit, and this is what came out: “Kill the rich, salt the earth.” Oh well. Written way before COVID-19, but my 8-year-old son turned to me this spring and asked, “Did you write the song ‘Hard Times’ about now, because we’re living through hard times?” No, I didn’t.

In Dostoevsky’s Notes From Underground, the narrator is a real son-of-a-bitch—contrarian, useless. Mad at the strong confident people who think they’ve got it figured out. And they don’t! And neither does the narrator — but he knows he doesn’t, and he at times yearns for some higher answer, and he’s funny, and too clever, but still knows he’s a piece of shit. I read Notes From Underground in high school and kinda forgot how it shaped my worldview until I sat down with it a couple years ago. The bridge on this song is basically smushed up quotes from Notes From Underground.

I was asking Shiftee, who mixed the record, if there are any vocal plug-ins I should be playing around with. He pointed me toward Little AlterBoy, which is basically a digital recreation of the kind of pedal the Knife use, for instance, on their vocal sound. It can shift the timbre/character of a voice without changing the pitch. Or change pitch without changing character. Very fun! Very much all over this track. Tried to make the bridge sound like a Sylvester song.

8. “Promised”

Another friend song masquerading as a love song. I’ve met a handful of extraordinary people in my life, who stopped doing extraordinary work because life is hard and it sucks. People who — I mean, it’s a lottery and random and who cares — could be great writers or artists, who kind of just disappeared. And it’s heartbreaking and frustrating. I don’t blame them. Maybe they weren’t made for this world. Maybe it’s just random. Maybe they’ll do amazing work in their 60s!

We tracked this song before it was written. Julie and Miles came over and we made up a structure and did a bunch of takes, found a groove. Which I then hacked up into what it is now! The bed tracks are lovely and loose. Maybe I’ll put out a jammier version of this song at some point. The other big synth on this record is the Oberheim OB-8, and that’s the bass on this one (triple tracked along with some MS-20).

9. “Not Gonna Die”

This song is about terrorism, and the response to terrorism. I wrote it a couple weeks after the Bataclan shooting in Paris in 2015. For some reason, a couple weeks after the shooting, I was in midtown Manhattan. I must have been Christmas shopping. I had to pop into the Sephora on 5th Avenue to pick up something specific — I think for my wife or her sister. I don’t remember. But I remember walking in, and the store was really crowded, and for just a split second I got really scared about what would happen if someone brought out a gun and started shooting up the crowd. And then I got so fucking mad at the people that made me feel that emotion. Like, I’m not gonna fucking die in the midtown Sephora, you fucking pieces of shit. Thanks for putting that thought in my head.

BUT ALSO, fuck all the fucking pieces of shit who are like, “We can’t accept refugees — what if they’re terrorists?” FUCK OFF. Some fucking terrified family driven from their home by a war isn’t going to kill me. Or anyone. Fuck off. Some woman from Central America fleeing from her husband who threatened to kill her isn’t going to fucking bomb Times Square. You fucking pieces of shit.

In November/December 2015, the Republican primary had already started — Trump had announced in June. And every single one of those pieces of shit running for president were talking about securing our borders, and keeping poor people out, and trying to justify it by security talk. FUCK OFF. You pieces of shit. Fuck right off. Anyway. Sorry for cursing.

I kind of think of the outro of this song as an angry “Everyday People.” Everyday people aren’t going to kill me. Lots of great saxes on this track from Matt Bauder and Stuart Bogie.

The intro of the song we recorded loud, full band, which I then ran through the MS-20 and filtered down till it was just a bass heart-pulse, and re-recorded solo piano and voice over that.

10. “Fine”

I kind of think that “Outta Here” to “Not Gonna Die” comprise the record, and “Fine” operates as the afterword and the prologue rolled into one. An author’s note, maybe. It was kind of inspired by high-period Kanye: I wanted to talk about something important in a profane, sometimes horribly stupid way, but have it be honest and ultimately transcendent.

In the song, I talk semi-accurately about where I come from. My mom’s dad was a guitar player who led bands throughout the ’30s and ’40s. In post-war LA, he had a band with Charles Mingus as the bass player. Charles Mingus! One of the greatest geniuses in all of American history. But this was the ’40s, and in order to travel with the band, to go in the same entrances, to eat dinner at the same table, he had to wear a Hawaiian shirt and everybody had to pretend he was Hawaiian. Because nobody was sure how racist they were supposed to be against Hawaiians.

Part of the reason I’m a musician is that my great-grandfather was a musician, and his kids were musicians, and their kids were musicians, and their kids are musicians. Part of the reason is vast generations of people working to make their kids’ lives better, down to my life. Part of the reason is that neither government nor mob has decided to destroy my family’s lives, wealth, and property for the last couple hundred years. I tried to write a song about that?

Generations is out now via Merge. Purchase it here.

https://www.stereogum.com/2098946/will-butler-generations-song-meanings/franchises/interview/footnotes-interview/

[fauzhee10069]

The Rock-Women, extinct or exist? (JoJolion)

This post is related to these posts:

JJBA Youthful Moms

The Biology of Rock-Humans

With the rise of youthful looking moms in JJBA, has Araki lost his ability in drawing 'old people'?

Araki’s evolving art-style

First, let's review his art-style and art-revolution in previous parts:

Part 1: Phantom Blood

I don’t really remember any significant old people here, so I’ll give it a pass.

Part 2: Battle Tendency

There was grandma Erina and Speedwagon in their 70s, both really looked their age.

There were also Straizo in his 70s and a 50 years old Lisa Lisa, as hamon users, they appeared younger than their age. Initially, Straizo looked like in his 50s and then in his 20s after he turned into vampire. Lisa Lisa looked like in her 20s, her youthful look had a purpose in-story and also got in-world recognition.

Then, there was also Erina in her 50s when she was holding baby Joseph, she really looked her age.

Part 3: Stardust Crusaders

There was this villainous villain named Enya Geil and she really looked old.

Then, a 69 years old grandpa Joseph really looked a granpa, despite being a hamon user. Readers believe that he rarely practices because he was lazy, but there is also wholesome speculation that he wanted to age together with his wife.

And Joseph’s wife, Suzy Q who is also a grandma looked old according to her age.

There was DIO who should be +100 years old, but just like Lisa Lisa and Straizo, as a vampire, he looked much younger than his actual age. Therefore, his youthful look had a purpose in-story.

Part 4: Diamond is Unbreakable

In part 4, there was Josuke’s grandpa, Higashikata Ryohei at 55 years old. He did look like a grandpa.

Then, a 79 years old Joseph who looked very old and frail.

There were also Kira’s parents who were in their old age.

Part 5: Vento Aureo/Golden Wind

Just like in part 1, I don’t recall any significant old people in this story, but there was a Stand named 「The Grateful Dead」 with its terrifying ability to forcefully age people over a large area. Araki had drawn the aging too well.

Part 6: Stone Ocean

I don’t really remember significant old character but I know about the user of 「Dragon’s Dream」, a 78 years old elderly prisoner named Kenzo. He looked bizarrely old like Enya Geil. But I think this part could be the beginning of the aging problem for certain parent characters.

First, Jolyne's mom (whom sadly never named) didn't really look like a middle-aged woman. Although her age was never mentioned, I believe that she should be in her 40s or at least late 30s which should be her youngest estimated age.

Then there was Mrs. Bluemarine, left panel is when her son was still a baby then the right panel is around 15 years later when she confessed her sin. Not only her face remained unchanged (with no apparent aging), the hairstyle and dress are hilariously not changed.

And the meme of Jotaro ages backwards is not without reason.

Part 7: Steel Ball Run

This part also has a similar problem with the previous, the main villain of part 7, Funny Valentine (43/48) in his sexy form (late appearance) didn’t look much older than Johnny (19) and Diego (20), when he should have been more than twice their age, old enough to be their dads. Can you see their age difference on these panels?

But interestingly, Araki was also able to draw the differences in age and facial features of the two females (Lucy and Scarlet), as the former (the 14 years old girl) eventually had to impersonate the later. I also believe that the first lady Scarlet was in late 30s or in her 40s.

Then, there was also Stephen Steel who was around 51-53 years old and he looked his age.

Perhaps in this case, Araki just wanted to tell that Funny Valentine was older than he looked.

And now, we reached JoJolion (part 8) that likely suffers from the ‘youthful moms’ syndrome. So how did this begin?

The Middle-Aged Moms and their looks in JoJolion

Kira Holy Joestar

The first middle-aged woman to be introduced in JJL was Kira Holy Joestar, a 52 years old woman. Interestingly, she really looked her age, a middle-aged woman.

This early Holy also has similar facial feature with Scarlet Valentine

In fact, I think Araki did really well when he drew her as we can see the age difference between Holy (52) and Yasuho (19) clearly, a thing I highly praise because Araki did not rely using the frown lines on the sides of the mouth to illustrate the aging.

Hirose Suzuyo

Another woman that we can consider as a middle-aged woman is Yasuho’s mom, Hirose Suzuyo. Even though she is younger than Holy, being 44 years old can already be considered a middle-aged.

But together with Yasuho on the same panel, she doesn't look much older than her daughter. She basically looks like Yasuho’s older sister than her mom.

And if you prefer '43' to be the correct age of Funny Valentine, then it would make Suzuyo a year older than the president (in their respective timeline).

(Higashikata) Caato

Then this infamous gilf who rocked readers in her early debut and still being hyped by her supporters, (Higashikata) Caato:

Being 52 years old, she is the same age as Kira Holy Joestar, but her appearances and the fact that she already had a grandson makes the readers thought that her youthful look must have ‘a reason’:

Is she secretly a rock woman?

Is she a fusion of two people by Rokakaka fruit that caused her stop aging (an outdated theory from redditors due to her strange eyes)?

Will her attractive look signify that she will be the main villain (like Funny Valentine)?

Besides, during her family reunion, it seemed that Araki no longer bothered to make her distinguishable and significantly belong to different generation from her daughter Hato.

Though I think, there was a moment when Caato kinda look her age just like Holy in her early debut:

What is behind their youthful looks?

I think it is kinda unfair to think that only Caato who purposely looks youthful while disregarding the other moms’ look. Holy's first debut with her middle-aged look was in chapter 14, then Yasuho’s mom, Suzuyo even debuted earlier back in chapter 8 and she already looked attractive and youthful there. Only then did Caato made her debut in chapter 55.

Many readers also don't consider Holy's appearance during the Vitamin C arc, flashback where she met Josefumi and her son Yoshikage. The timeline at the time should be around 2010, because a chapter earlier (50), Yoshikage talked about Iwakiri, a baseball player who was taking a year off since 2009 due to an injury. Then Josefumi and Kira Yoshikage took action to steal Locacaca's branch until afterwards headed to a scene with Holy.

JJL chapter 51: Vitamin C and Killer Queen – part 2

In other words, a year ago (2010), Holy was already in her early 50s! And her face here definitely looks younger than her face when she debuted for the first time. We can argue that perhaps her older look in present time (her debut) was caused by her strange illness, as people who are sick often appear older than usual.

But in Holy's most recent appearance in chapter 92, she looks much younger than her age:

Her wiki page also agrees and has described her appearance that she still having her ‘youthful look’:

Holy Joestar-Kira’s wikia page

So, here is the breakdown:

Hirose Suzuyo (Yasuho’s mom)’s debut in chapter 8, aged 44, she is older than she looks.

Kira Holy Joestar’s debut in chapter 14, aged 52, she looked her age.

Kira Holy Joestar’s appearance in chapter 51, aged 51, she is older than she looks.

(Higashikata) Caato’s debut in chapter 55, aged 52, she is older than she looks.

Kira Holy Joestar’s recent appearance in chapter 92, aged 52, she is older than she looks.

The mystery is why Araki changed Holy's appearance from her initial debut? Why does she become younger than before? Did he do this on purpose or is this purely due to his evolving art?

The Hidden Rock Woman and The Red Herrings

What is ‘female rock-human’ in general?

They are indistinguishable from (carbon-based) female humans.

Their life span is ±240 years (just like the males).

They can be older than they look (just like the males).

They need to hibernate (just like the males).

Their gestation period is 6 months and give birth in the spring and summer.

They rarely (if ever) have affection for or a parental relationship with their children.

Their babies have an average body length of 28 mm and weight of 15 grams.

They can procreate with human males.

As Araki has brought up about the existence of rock-human females in chapter 99, coupled with the possibility of reproduction with (carbon-based) human males, readers have created various theories about them.

(Higashikata) Caato

The most popular theory nowadays is about “Caato as the rock-woman”. Since the beginning, this female character is often hyped as the character who will play a major role, mostly in antagonist side, be it as the main villain and (now) as ‘the rock-woman’.

I think there are a lot of made-up theories and far-fetched reasons created by her supporters, problems regarding the theory of "Caato as the rock-woman" have been mostly explained in my previous post:

Is Caato a Rock-Woman?

Even so, I myself have not dared to confirm that Caato can’t be a rock-woman. However, my post there was more to show how forced, flawed and ridiculous the theories made by her supporters. I am worried that this would be 'the case of bad writing' so I also hope that Araki would not make it happen.

But if Araki is going to make Caato a female rock-human in the future, I hope that he can provide a nice explanation with a story that makes sense and is not forced. Still, I think to make Caato a rock-woman will be the most complicated choice.

We never saw the signs of Caato as a rock-human. In her flashback, she had already behaved very different from the rock-woman, she was shown as a doting mom, she really loves Jobin and took care of him, in contrast to rock-woman who abandoned her newborn baby. She didn’t want Jobin to get hurt, she almost cried (see the beginning scene when he climbed a tree), she was very worried about him. Unlike the rock-women, Caato certainly has affection to her children. 

Then we’ve also seen how her children grew up like any normal human in contrast to the bizarre growth of the rock-humans:

We still don’t know what happens to the baby born from reproduction between human males and rock-women? A human babies, rock-babies or crossbreeds?

Then with the four children of Norisuke IV and Caato, we also have to begin questioning again about what Jobin, Hato, Joshu and Daiya truly are? Are they half rock-humans, fully rock-humans or just regular humans? The problem is: we’ve been following their characters and there is absolutely no hint that these four were somewhat different from regular humans.

If the crossbreeds are somewhat different than the normal humans, then Araki will need to further develop not just one, but “four characters!” to show how they slightly differ from normal humans. Then if Jobin is a half rock-human with Mitsuba as regular human female, is it possible for Tsurugi to be born then? This will also be a problem that must be resolved in the story.

As rock-humans need to hibernate, how is he going to show that Caato need it too? Or perhaps she is fighting it off? A Caatofag has theorized that she uses Locacaca to be able to do that, as her son Jobin has access to the fruit, this kinda makes sense. However, there are many plotholes in this theory that need to be explored.

The fact that Caato became a model prisoner and was able to perform the penal hard labor for 15 years should be contradicting the idea of her as a rock-woman, but a Caatofag uses Locacaca as the reason of why she was able to do that, because in chapter 32, Yotsuyu was able to cure the dog Iwasuke of the rock-disease by feeding it a piece of a it. But what about Aishō? The member of Damokan Group did not use Locacaca to fight off his hibernation, he still needed to hibernate and that was the cause of his break up with his (then) girlfriend.

Besides, if Caato fights off her hibernation to hide her status as a rock-woman, she should have done it since her marriage to Norisuke IV, as her (then) husband just found out about the existence of rock-humans after the death of Yotsuyu.

This meant that Caato should have used Locacaca long before she was incarcerated. Then if she already used it during her marriage to Norisuke IV, it should include the flashback in chapter 64 as well, when she cured Jobin of the rock-disease using equivalent exchange on Higashikata’s land. Why did she use her late mother-in-law’s method instead of Locacaca (which allegedly in her possession)? Isn't Locacaca the fruit believed to be able to heal the rock-disease?

Then supposed that the rock-disease that has befallen the Higashikata family is the result of reproduction between human male and rock-woman, Caato as ‘a rock-woman’ can’t be the cause because the disease has already existed since several generations before and had afflicted the daughter of the first generation of Norisuke (I), Higashikata Rina.

We have seen how Caato handled the family curse in the past (chapter 64) and in that scene we did not see any hint of her as ‘a rock-human’ and her relation with the curse. It will be convoluted and redundant to have Caato reappears as a rock-human and involve her in Higashikata’s family curse once again. In short, Araki will need a lot of build-up to make Caato a rock-woman.

Kira Holy Joestar

Then, there is Kira Holy Joestar. If Caato becomes a candidate for secret rock-woman due to her youthful look (and various wild speculations), then Holy also deserved to be a candidate for the same reason.

Unlike Caato, in which her knowledge regarding Locacaca and her connection to the rock-humans are still pure speculations, Holy is already closer to both of these things (Locacaca & rock-humans). She has done scientific analysis on Locacaca and also knows about the rock-humans organization (Head Doctor gang and Damokan Group).

However, making Holy a rock-woman is probably more impossible than Caato because she is a descendant of Joestar family with very clear lineage too.

Johnny is clearly not a rock-human while Rina, she could be a descended from a rock-human (if that is the reason for the existence of the ‘rock-disease’). Holy can’t be a full blooded rock-human, but she can still be a crossbreed or a descendant of a rock-human.

By looking at Joestar family tree, it is still possible to make Johnny's son or grandson to marry a rock-woman. The rock-woman could be Elizabeth or Suzie Q, but I am more inclined to have Elizabeth as ‘the rock-woman’, she could be a little callback from Lisa Lisa in part 2 with her youthful look and how Lisa Lisa was made to abandon baby Joseph in the past. This can also be a nice parallelism to the rock-women's nature in abandoning their newborn baby.

In addition, Holy as a descendant of rock-human/crossbreed can be served as a nice reason of why the Head Doctor gang used Holy as their test subject.

Unfortunately, unlike the rock-woman, Holy also has affection to her children, even to other children whom she did not give birth to. However, if the speculation is only limited to "Holy as a descendant of rock-human", then this is still possible, because her traits might have been mixed with normal human’s traits.

Another problem is that Araki also has to build up Holy’s children, Yoshikage and Kyo, that they also have to descend from rock-human. However, they are still easier to build-up than Caato's children, as Yoshikage is already dead and Kyo rarely shows up.

If Kira Yoshikage is descended from rock-human, then Yoshikage who has turned into Josuke will make Josuke (the main protagonist) a part of rock-human as well. This can be an astonishing parallel if both Josuke and Tooru (as the main villain) are somewhat rock-humans (suppose that Tooru will be the main villain).

The next problem is about the existence of rock-disease that has befallen to the Higashikata family. If the crossbreeding between a human male and rock-woman was the cause of it, why didn't the curse fall on Johnny's descendants? It only ever struck his wife Rina in the past. Johnny's method in 1901 might have succeeded in protecting his descendants from the curse.

Holy's illness which was initially thought to be a part of family curse is apparently the product of illegal experiment. Therefore, will it be possible if Holy is a descendant of rock-human?

Hirose Suzuyo

Lastly, there is also Hirose Suzuyo who is still attractive at 44 years old, despite being several years younger than Holy and Caato, her youthful look should also be a consideration as well.

I think making Suzuyo the secret rock-woman would be the easiest choice compared to Caato and Holy. Out of the three characters, she has the least development and this instead becomes her advantage.

Caato and Norisuke IV have divorced and this is often used as an excuse by supporters that their failed relationship was caused by one of them (Caato) being a rock-human.

Caato is not the only person who has been divorced, Josefumi’s mother Kiyomi and Yasuho’s mom Suzuyo have also been divorced. Therefore, Suzuyo could have the excuse that her divorce from her husband could be the result of an incompatible relationship between a human and a rock-human.

JJL chapter 71: Hairclip of the Qing Dynasty

Chapter 46 told that “95% of rock-humans are Stand users”, Caato and (allegedly) Holy are Stand users, but what about Suzuyo?

Maybe yes maybe no, but the way she dressed when she debuted for the first time in chapter 8 could be a typical Stand user’s style:

Thanks to her limited appearance, it’s not difficult to suddenly turn her into a Stand user.

The only problem is that Araki (again) has to build-up Yasuho, the main female protagonist as a rock-human descent, but is it possible?

There is one particular incident in chapter 94, as Yasuho has snuck into Higashikata's house, Jobin caught her and flushed 「Paisley Park」 down the toilet, breaking both Yasuho and her Stand’s body in the process.

JJL chapter 94: The Wonder of You (Your Miraculous Love) – part 11

Seeing how her body was in the process of breaking apart, some readers pointed out that there is a resemblance to the rock-humans' body while breaking apart.

JJL chapter 32 & JJL chapter 42

Others simply assumed that Yasuho's breaking body is the effect of her breaking Stand as well.

I am also more inclined towards the second opinion, in which her body is breaking apart simply because of her breaking Stand. But the interpretation of this picture is still free, so it would be easy for Araki if he suddenly wants to decide that the reason of Yasuho's breaking body is due to her being a part of rock-human.

It is also fortunate that we have not seen normal humans and their Stands break apart like Yasuho and her 「Paisley Park」.

Perhaps, making Yasuho a part of rock-human could be the reason why Tooru dated her. I've always felt there must be something behind this. Tooru as the person behind HD gang can't possibly date Yasuho without reason.

Even though they had broken up, Tooru is still eager to to rekindle his relationship with Yasuho, but chapter 97 proves that his reason for that was not simply that he still loved her. There must be something that he wants from her and will take advantage of her.

But back to the issue of the origin of the Higashikata’s family curse, if the crossbreeding is the cause, why doesn't it befall to Yasuho too?

Once again, it is fortunate that we got the flashback of Higashikata Rina as the female affected by rock-disease. She became symptomatic as adult, in her late 20s. Yasuho is a female and she is still 19, it is possible if the rock-disease had not yet befallen her (suppose that she is a crossbreed).

The real problem is that Suzuyo has also shown that she cares to her daughter Yasuho, again, the opposite trait with the rock-women.

JJL chapter 24 & JJL chapter 71

Though she is not on Holy's level… or the level of Caato to Jobin, at least she is trying to show her love to Yasuho.

Then how about her job? Being a single mom should have demanded Suzuyo to have a job to support Yasuho and her life. We've never seen what kind of job Suzuyo has, we've only seen in her debut that she brought a man home from a club. Was this part of her job as a hostess or she simply had fun?

In her flashback of chapter 71, we have seen Suzuyo who was currently receiving a call, was the phone related to her job?

Suppose that it was related to her job, “Oh really? Sounds exciting, I’ll write that down”… an idea? Or was it a new job offer? Freelancing?

It is very fortunate that it is still very hard to determine of Suzuyo's actual career, Araki just has to give her a career that is suitable for rock-human if he wants to make her a rock-human.

Crossbreeding and developing affection in rock-women(?)

Apparently, these three women share the same problems, that they have affection for their children, the opposite trait of rock-women in chapter 99. The mother who had more of a similar nature to rock-women is (actually) Kujo Kiyomi, Josefumi’s mother. She almost left a drowning Josefumi, though the guilt overcame her in the end.

JJL chapter 52: Vitamin C and Killer Queen – part 3

Even so, Josefumi still felt that his mother had abandoned him. Could it be that she abandoned him again after the drowning event and that’s why Josefumi had a lot of respect for Holy as his mother figure? Or maybe it was only to that particular moment, but it was so engraved on Josefumi's memory that he hated his own mother?

And also remember that Kujo Kiyomi has been divorced. Too bad we never saw her again in her middle-aged, but I believe that if she will reappear, she will have that 'youthful look' like any others.

Regarding Caato and Suzuyo, suppose that they are rock-women, it is possible that they may develop affection for their children as a result of their copulation with human males.

To be honest, I think that Caato's role is more of a comparison to the other Higashikata mothers, so it would be too much if she is a rock-woman as I explained in my previous post.

However regarding Suzuyo, I think that her efforts to take care and love Yasuho are like a rock-woman learning to be a 'mother'.

JJL chapter 24: Paper Moon Deception – part 2

Perhaps it is just me, but Suzuyo’s response in that scene is a bit weird. She offered Yasuho to cook for her while playing video games, something that pretty normal in family dynamic. But then, Yasuho declined and said she was just going to go out again. Annoyed by her daughter response, she brought up Yasuho’s annoying attitude and likened her to her ex-husband (Yasuho’s father).

When Yasuho remarked that she was in a rush and didn’t have a time to be lectured her, Suzuyo out-of-nowhere brought up whether she wasn't motherly to Yasuho, something that I think was not quite related in a conflict. Because I have also experienced a similar conflict with my mother, but she wouldn't suddenly bring up of her being motherly and just straightly scolded me.

It was as if she said that “I’m trying to be a good mother for you, because I’m not like the other rock-women out there.”

JJL chapter 71: Hairclip of the Qing Dynasty

Her bad-mouthing her ex-husband (Yasuho’s dad) felt like she was trying to keep Yasuho away from her father. Besides, her words also indicate possessiveness towards her daughter.

Rock-humans in general have little to no relationship with their children, unlike (carbon-based) humans. So maybe Suzuyo is trying hard to get close to her daughter Yasuho while trying to keep her away from her father, because (perhaps) in her perspective, a close relationship between fellow humans will always be easier to achieve compared to the rock-humans.

Conclusion

At first I thought that ‘the youthful moms’ in JoJolion is just a deliberate artistic choice on behalf of Araki to make the characters more attractive, but what if it turns out to have a purpose?

Added with the recent chapter (99) which hinted the existence of rock-women, what if Araki wanted to make us wonder, is it true that currently there is a rock-woman among his characters? Which one?

I don't know why but I feel that possibility may lie in some middle-aged mother characters that look younger than their actual age. I also became suspicious, why Araki changed Holy’s appearance in chapter 92, that she significantly looks younger than when she debuted?

Especially with the reemergence of the theory about Caato as a rock-woman which becomes popular once again.

Of course I am more certain that a rock-woman will appear in the form of a flashback which will explain the origin of Higashikata’s family curse. It would also fit into the plausible theory of ‘reproduction’ that has been created by u/Mamezuku on reddit. But what if a rock-woman would appear in the present time as well? Who is she? Will it be Caato?

Of the three candidates I suspect, Caato will be the most difficult choice and requires a lot of build-up (and possibly retconing here and there). Holy highly unlikely will be a full blooded rock-woman, but it’s possible to make her a descendant of a rock-human and the build-up will be slightly easier. Suzuyo (Yasuho’s mom) will be an unexpected choice but she will be the easiest and least complicated to be built-up, the only big challenge is about the build-up of her daughter Yasuho as a crossbreed.

[mingishoe]

50 kpop questions

Just because I’ve been stuck inside for exactly 31, almost 32 days, which is terrible for my mental health sO i’m doing this to keep my mind off of things. Also I’m really sorry for not posting this week, I’ve been working on requests and I’ve just been taking my time and stuff so yeah. Thank you for being patient babes~~

1.)The first song that got you into kpop? So surprisingly it wasn’t a  BTS song even though Run was the first kpop song I heard... it was Sorry by The Rose  

2.) The first group you starting staning in kpop? So sorry was a song that really stuck with me for the longest time and almost immediately after I started staning The Rose. Usually when I tell people its a band and not necessarily a ‘normal’ kpop group that has choreo and stuff, they’re always really surprised because even now they’re not super super popular. 

3.) Your first bias? So even though The Rose isn’t a normal choreo kpop group my first bias was Dojoon but pretty soon after I got into BTS and before I learned their names I was really drawn to Namjoon, so I’d say either one of those.

4.) Your first bias wrecker? Okay so in The Rose I didn’t really have one but in BTS my bias wrecker was Yoongi and obviously he wrecked me because uhh yeah Yoongi is now my bias BUT it’s still Yoongi after years sooo...

5.) Your favorite boy group? My favourite boy group is Ateez (obviously lmao)

6.)Your favorite girl group? My favourite girl group currently is Itzy but I’m really stuck between BlackPink as well.

7.) Your ultimate bias If it’s not obvious enough, its Mingi... hence my username

8.) The main fandom your apart of? I’d say I’m mainly Atiny, but there’s a huge Army inside of me.

9.) Your ultimate group? My ult group is also Ateez

10.) Your favorite era of your ultimate group?

Dude all of Ateez’ eras are literally all perfect but I’d say either this past comeback, the Answer era or the Wave/Illusion era.

11.) Your opinion, black haired idols or dyed hair? I love me a good pretty hair colour *Cough* mingi’s red hair and Yoongi’s mint hair *cough* but also P L E A S E let their hair B R E A T H E BEFORE IT FALLS OUT!

12.) Aegyo master girls?

So the groups I watch honestly don’t really like/don’t have the best aegyo but Lisa is really cute so I’d say her

13.) Aegyo master boys?

We all know our boy Jooheon- as much as it makes me wanna invert on myself it’s also insanely cute

14.) Your favorite maknae

So you know... it’s between Jongho and Jungkook but I think I’d have to say Kook.

15.) Your ‘child’ group?

I don’t really know what that means so UHHH

16.) The group you could see yourself becoming best friends with?

Dude honestly as much as I love ateez I just wanna be best friends with BTS so FUCKING BAD like dawg they’re just so funny and yeah 

17.) Your favorite boy group kpop song ?

This is a really hard question because there’s like a million answers but I’d say Utopia. That song without a doubt makes me cry every time I listen to it because it’s just so beautiful and it just makes my heart so happy,

18.) Your favorite kpop song girls?

I don’t wanna be basic or anything but it’s either ddu-du-ddu-du by BlackPink or ooh-ahh by Twice

19.) Are you more into girl groups or boy groups?

I’m more of a boy group stan because I’m not a huge fan of the cutesy stuff most girl groups do, but I do enjoy girl groups as well it’s just more difficult for me to get into them.

20.) Favorite kpop girl dance?

Once again I don’t wanna be basic but I really like either Whistle or BOOMBAYAH by BlackPink or Cheer Up by Twice. 

21.) Favorite kpop boy dance?

I really like Love Shot and Ko Ko Bop by EXO or Serendipity by Jimin BTS 

22.) If you were stuck in a horror movie you’d want which group with you?

Okay so no matter what group I’d pick I’d be dead bUT I think my best bet would be maybe Ateez because they got Jongho and that boy is strong and not scared of anything.

23.) Favorite fandom light stick?

By far my favourite is the BlackPink light stick because it’s literally the cutest thing ever aND IT SQUEAKS!!! like someone please buy it for me. Please and Thank You.

24.) Favorite fandom name?

I really like Ikon’s ikonic and Ateez’ Atiny

25.) Visual king?

Yeosang PERIODT, baby gets slept on way too much on his visuals and KQ was right to make him a visual.

26.) Visual queen?

Dude Jisoo from BlackPink. She’s so beautiful and shes in my top 3 of female idols I think are the most gorgeous thing in the world.

27.) Dance queen?

Lisa from BlackPink. If you’ve seen her mentoring on that chinese show- BITCH you can see how serious she takes it and it’s so satisfying to watch but also I’d cry if I’d ever have to dance in front of her.

28.) Dance king?

Hoseok from BTS. Like once again you can physically see how serious he takes it and its insanely hot but also very scary and like Lisa I’d cry if I’d ever have to dance in front of him.

29.) Rap king?

This is an opinion and I’ve met so many people who have actually fought with me on this one but Hoseok from BTS is literally such a good rapper. I understand he might not be the best but he is my favourite rapper in kpop. I just absolutely love his tone of voice and idk UGH i just love Hoseok overall.

30.)Rap queen?

I know a lot of people are probably gonna disagree with me on this one but uh I think Moonbyul, Hyuna, and Jessi are some of the best rappers because personally I just really like their tones and UGH they’re all just beautiful. 

31.) A group you’d really like to get into?

There are SO many groups I would love to get into but I’d say a girl group would be Dreamcatcher because I listen to their songs and they’re all great but I just haven’t found the time to sit down and learn their names or anything. A boy group would be MCND because I saw their debut like an hour after it released and it was really good and once again I really like their debut album but I just haven’t found the time to sit down and learn their names either.

32.)Your favorite ship?

I’m personally not really into ships so I’ll just use ships as friendships so I’d say either Yoonmin, sope, but probably Vmin would be my favourite, which are all BTS ships.

33.) Your favorite intergroup friendship?

I think I’m gonna say Jackson Wang from GOT7 and Namjoon from BTS. They’re both just really cute so yeah kjdfskd

34.)Ballads or upbeat songs?

Personally ballads because I prefer slower more cute or sad songs or the complete opposite and like trap with a loud ass bass.

35.) Have you ever met any of your idols?

No but I would love to. Rationally thinking I think I would completely shut down and not know what to do because some of these people I look up to so highly and literally thank them for the sole reason of me being happy and being able to get through such difficult times.

36.) Do you prefer cute themes or sexy themes?

Once again I don’t really like cutesy themes that much so I’m going to go on the sexy themes side. also i’m a hardstan so obviously.

37.) How long have you been a kpop fan?

So I’ve been around Kpop for a really long time because a few of my friends listened to BTS and Super Junior and stuff like that I always listened to it but I was forcefully trying not to get into it but eventually I gave up and secretely got into kpop around 2017 but then i “Came out of the kpop closet” as my friends like to say after the Burn The Stage movie came out because my friend took me to go see it with her when it came out in 2018. But yeah if I let myself I would’ve been a kpop stan a long ass time ago.

38.) Your favorite comeback song?

There were so many comebacks that I really loved so there’s a few but Got7 You Calling My Name and Ateez Wonderland are two of my favourites.

39.) Do you have any kpop company you tend to prefer?

Not really, but I’d say I listen to many artists from JYP.

40.) Barefaced idols or make up?

I WILL A L W A Y S SAY THIS! BAREFACED IDOLS ARE SUPERIOR! THEY’RE S O BEAUTIFUL NO MATTER HOW MANY “IMPERFECTIONS” THEY HAVE!

41.) Is you bias list as out of control as mine?

My bias list is pretty much all rappers except maybe 2 or 3 so I’d say I have a type sdfskfhskjd

42.) How many groups do you actually keep tabs on?

A lot more than I actually realize but mostly Ateez, BTS, Monsta x, and Itzy. But I heavily rely on twitter for the rest of my groups

43.) Your current favorite kpop song?

I really don’t even know... but I’d say Utopia by Ateez.

44.) First kpop dance you’ve attempted to learn?

So I attempted to learn a bunch of dances but I really just gave up bUT a dance I’ve actually solidly learned is Ddu-du-ddu-du by BlackPink.

45.) When I hear kpop songs in public I....?

Personally I’m not ashamed to like kpop in public or anything. Like I’ll wear merch and stuff in public sO I’d probably not even make a big deal out of it and just sing along quietly.

46.) If I knew someone irl who had the same bias as me I would...?

Honestly we could like thirst and bond over having the same bias> I don’t get the people who get actually offended if people have the same bias and then defensive and possessive whenever they do have the same bias.

47.) Kpop idol I would most like to meet?

I probably would like to meet Wooyoung or San from Ateez. They both just seem like the nicest, sweetest people ever and I’d just love to have that experience.

48.) Kpop idol who is like a role model to me?

Namjoon from BTS. Do I even have to explain that? Honestly that man should be a role model and an inspiration to everyone but...

49.) Favorite kpop lyrics?

Sunrise by Ateez. The lyrics have helped me through many difficult times and every time I listen to it it’s a reminder that everything is going to be okay.

Why is my life so dark? Why, always makes me hard? A lost heart The burden on my shoulders Let's wait a little longer, even if it's cold. It's gonna rise. Sooner or later. Let's wait and see, alright. What I want someone to say to me, even if it's a lie. "You don't have to worry." "You're doing great." "Just keep it up. Just like you do now."

50.) If I had a whole day with my bias I would....”

I would honestly just wanna do something chill. Like Imagine just chilling and watching movies while eating snacks with Mingi- idk about you but honestly that’s probably the best thing I could imagine.

[curlyhairedbibliophile]

Friday Black by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah || Book Review

ATY in 52 Books | A book that was nominated for or won an award in a genre you enjoy (National Book Foundation Honoree, 5 Under 35)

Synopsis | In the stories of Adjei-Brenyah's debut, an amusement park lets players enter augmented reality to hunt terrorists or shoot intruders played by minority actors, a school shooting results in both the victim and gunman stuck in a shared purgatory, and an author sells his soul to a many-tongued god.

By placing ordinary characters in extraordinary situations, Adjei-Brenyah reveals the violence, injustice, and painful absurdities that black men and women contend with every day. These stories tackle urgent instances of racism and cultural unrest and explore the many ways we fight for humanity in an unforgiving world.

REVIEW

I’d never really been one to go for short stories in the past. Preferences aside,  this collection seemed to be more my speed, so I gave it a shot. Just the titles alone had me intrigued to want to find out what could be behind them, and I was never disappointed in what I found. Reading through this felt like watching mini episodes of Black Mirror, and I wouldn't mind seeing some of them expand into full novels. 

Highlights

The Finkelstein 5

Emmanuel started learning the basics of his Blackness before he knew how to do long division: smiling when angry, whispering when he wanted to yell. 

An extremely surreal tale about seeking justice for those who lost their lives at the hands of those “protecting” themselves. I knew from the first sentence that I was in for a wild ride and this did not disappoint. The switching between the court room proceedings and Emmanuel’s day and thought process was really strong, especially when the events and outcome seemed to fuel his motivation. It did make me angry in parts just because it felt so close to home in relation to all the shootings and killings over the last few years, but the ending, while dark, still made me feel like an anger was released. 

The Era

Everybody gets their mandatory Good in the mornings with breakfast at school, but they have extra at the nurse’s. I go to the nurse because Good makes me feel good. When I have Good, it’s easy to be proud and truthful, and ignore the things that cloud my truth, like Marlene, or being made into an example, or knowing I’ll never be perfect.

This was an interesting take on the quest for perfection and what we as a society will put ourselves through to achieve it. It also said a lot about how we often look down on expressed emotion, like when people speak their mind on current issues going on in society and are then told to calm down and stop being “sensitive.” There were many instances here that I could see happening in an episode of Black Mirror, which is a little terrifying because so many things depicted don’t seem that far away from reality.

Lark Street

An impossible hand punched my earlobe. An unborn fetus, aborted the day before, was standing at my bedside. His name was Jackie Gunner.

A dark, but really interesting tale about a man being confronted face to face with his aborted twins. Parts of this were really sad, especially in terms of the conversations the father had with his would-be children. It ultimately came down to a matter of preparedness and abandonment, which gave this a lot of meaning for me.

Zimmer Land 

Zimmer Land Mission: 1) To create a safe place for adults to explore problem-solving, justice, and judgement. 2) To provide the tools for patrons to learn about themselves in curated heightened situations. 3) To entertain.

Of the 12, this one reminded me of Black Mirror the most, specifically the White Bear and Black Museum episodes. The title alone gave me an inkling to what the overall story might be about, but much like Finkelstein 5, I wasn’t entirely prepared for what I would find. The read was really disturbing at times, especially factoring in the idea that people might actually participate in something like this and get any amusement out of it. 

Friday Black

Ever since that first time, since the bite, I can speak Black Friday. Or I can understand it, at least. Not fluently, but well enough. I have some of them in me. I hear the people, the sizes, the model, the make, and the reason. Even if all they’re doing is foaming at the mouth.

This one hit close to home for me working in retail, especially during the craziness of the holidays. I really liked the take on this with someone who’s been doing this for so long that they speak another language, in this case being zombie-like customers who will do anything for the latest winter coat. It made Black Friday seem more like a viral outbreak that consumes every ounce of an individual’s humanity and turns them into a mindless creature (which it seems to be doing more and more each year, to be quite honest).

Light Spitter

The ghost of Fuckton walks from the bathroom, drawn to the angel floating over her former body, which is limp and bent over the back of a cushy chair. Deirdra and Fuckton see each other.                                                      

“What happened?” Fuckton asks.                                

Deirdra turns her head and tries to spit on Fuckton, but all that comes from her mouth are slim rays of light. After trying and failing to do anything but shine, she says, “You killed her - me. You killed me.” Fuckton stares at the angel. She looks just like the dead girl on the chair used to. Then he looks at the body.

“Oh, yeah. That feels like it was ages ago. My bad,” Fuckton says.

Much like the confrontation in Lark Street, this was another interesting take on a conversation between two parties that I’d never considered. It brought to mind something I’ve always wondered whenever these mass shootings occur - What exactly goes through the mind of a killer? And if they survive, do they ever have any remorse for the lives they took and the aftermath they’ve caused? I really appreciated the path this took with the two spirits navigating their way through their new existences, trying to help prevent similar catastrophes and opening themselves up to communication, possibly even forgiveness down the line. This could absolutely be a good conversation starter for a much needed and overdue discussion on what went wrong with those that have already happened and how to prevent more from happening in the future.

Overall, this was such a wild ride of beautifully interesting and creepy imagery with a wide range of genres and topics, and I can’t wait to read even more in the future! 

Rating |  🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 Goodreads

[doomedandstoned]

I’ll Take a Sling of Singapore Sludge, Thank You

  Axis Mundi is the name. Learn it well. 

It wasn't two months ago that I stumbled upon 'The Depths' (2019), debut EP by sludge metal trio AXIS MUNDI. I'm aware of merely a handful of heavy bands from the Republic of Singapore (which is totally my fault, I'm sure), but it wasn't just the novelty of relative obscurity that gave the band its allure. When I listened to The Depths, it was its hard-biting heaviness, gritty realism, and (I confess) the courage to cover Nirvana that ultimately endeared me to vocalist Sathish Kumar, guitarist Vinod Dass, and drummer Mitch Goon. Following is my exchange with Vinod about the band's origins, the meaning behind their name, and what it's like to be oh so sludge in Singapore.

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I have to say, we haven't encountered too many sludge or death-doom bands in Singapore, but it's encouraging to see more and more with each passing year. Tell us, if you please, how Axis Mundi got its start and introduce us to the members of the band.

The idea to form this band came to me in early 2018 after coming back to home soil after staying abroad for about two years. I got my first exposure to the sludge and stoner doom in Melbourne Australia by getting my face completely melted off by Dixie and gang from Weedeater, it was one of the first gigs I attended in Melbourne and it really resonated with me as it was something completely fresh and different from the mainly thrash and death scene metal -- the whole lineup for this band all played and still play in death metal bands back home. (laughs) And seeing then drummer Travis Owens bouncing sticks off the floor while destroying the drums was a life changing experience no doubt.

I had some things to express and found myself naturally starting to write in the direction of sludge and doom and decided it was time to get some partners in crime, so I got in touch with Mitch for drums, since we played together in a previous band for close to a decade and I knew his hard hitting style would suit the sound I was going for.

I then hit up Sathish, who was the vocalist of his band I was sessioning bass for. I loved his low growls and aggression and thought it was a perfect fit for what I wanted. We formed around march of 2018, so it is a very fresh band although its members have been (and still are) close friends for more than a decade.

What is the significance of the name Axis Mundi?

The term Axis Mundi hit me after getting into the study of symbols and their significance to the human mind. I had always found them interesting and the deeper I read into them the symbol of the World Tree kept reappearing in art and media I resonated with, especially during the writing phase of this EP, so I let things take their course. Its basic idea is the center of the universe, the connection of higher and lower, heaven and earth, Consciousness and the Unconscious.

What are some distinctives of your style? Asked another way, how would you describe your sound to someone who has never heard you before?

What resulted from the three of us coming together was a blend of the sludge and doom riffs together with a faster tempo coupled with brutal vocals. I was listening to a lot of High on Fire, Monolord and Nails, my drummer was listening to Dyscarnate and Aborted and my vocalist was pushing Full of Hell and Comeback Kid. So ideas were pulled from all these sources!

You have a new EP! Walk us through it, please, track by track (sharing any background about each song's composition and recording, lyrical and thematic tie-ins, and any anecdotes that come to mind related to each).

Track 1 – The Depths

The Depths EP by Axis Mundi

The basic idea behind this track was it was going to be a noise track introducing the album and was meant to put the idea of being “down in the depths” to the listener, which was kind of how I was feeling as I wrote this record, so I though this was a good place to begin. I took this chance to give some Bladerunner 2049 worship. That movie was a goddamn religious experience sonically and visually.

Track 2 – Summoning the Serpent

The Depths EP by Axis Mundi

This song was the first song to be completed in terms of writing for the EP. It was one of the cases where I had a couple of riffs and had no idea how to bring them together or even if they were going to be part of the same song, but the moment the band came together, everything fit together like a jigsaw puzzle out of the blue, that kind of creative spark is the shit I live for. The basic idea for the song is the looking inside of oneself to come face to face with your fears and your flaws, to summon them up like a serpent and face them.

Track 3 – Revelations

The Depths EP by Axis Mundi

The opening riff of this song is the riff which gave birth to the band, it was one of the first riffs written, but it was also one of the last songs to be completed as we were writing for an album. The writing process for this song was really one of patience, I would try some ideas out with the band, they wouldn’t work and we would be back at the drawing board, but I remember I had to keep reminding myself not to rush things and cram some jackass riff in there just to finish the song. It had to feel right.

The driving force of this song was one of searching -- searching for clarity, for vision, for meaning. It ties in with Track 2 as Summoning the Serpent is like an admission of wrongdoing and Revelations is like a search for a new path.

Track 4 – Territorial Pissings

The Depths EP by Axis Mundi

I am a super huge Nirvana fan and I knew I wanted to cover one of their songs for this release. I also wanted to do it our way and put our own twist to it as I love it when bands do that. This was another song that came out the way it was in like 10 minutes, and now that I’m thinking about it, the chorus of this song actually ties in with Revelations. (laughs) Life is strange.

Who is responsible for the album art and what does it signify?

The album art work is done by Faris Samri, a killer drummer I used to play with in a black metal band! I happened upon some of his designs and thought he could take my rough demo for the album art to the next level. I came into contact with the Adinkra symbol "Hye Won Hye" which basically means "that which cannot be burnt," a West African symbol of endurance, which I thought was perfect for the EP. I then decided to recreate the symbol with the goat skull and Christ on the cross, which is the voluntary acceptance of suffering, symbolically speaking. The skull and cross was mirrored downward, creating the symbol of Hye Won Hye, as well as signifying the duality within a person, light and dark, love and hate and the struggle to balance them. Faris took it to the next level with the addition of flames to the lower half. Here is his take on it:

“The artwork was meant to resemble an Adinkran symbol of endurance. Reading more into its origins, it is said that the symbol got its meaning from traditional priests who were capable of walking on fire without being burnt. This made me inclined to include the element of fire from its history into my illustration.

I began by drawing the first goat skull, engulfing it in flames, scorching some of its original skeletal features. Before I began on the second skull, I realised I was not fond of the idea of having two identical burning goat skulls, as I could have easily duplicated the one i had just drawn and inverted it to complete the illustration. Referring back to the bed of fire the priests had to walk on, I decided to illustrate flames in the shape of the goat skull instead of the actual skull. These newly drawn flames will enter through the first goat skull, which exhibits the skull’s imperishability in such circumstances.

The next step was to colour the piece, which I did on Photoshop as I wanted to experiment with a selection of palettes I had come up with. The colours chosen mostly had a gore or horror vibe about them, referencing older metal album artworks from bands like Slipknot or Mastodon, to Horror film posters such as It or Blair Witch Project.”

What are some of the bands you play with in Singapore and, more specifically, how is the doom-sludge scene in your country?

Mitch and I played in a death metal outfit called Zaganoth, which was our first serious band and Sathish used to head another death metal band called Stillborn and both bands used to play shows with each other in the past!

Now besides playing in this band I play guitars for Truth Be Known a death/funcore veteran band that is heading down south to Australia for the Dead of Winter Festival! I also play in a band called Mucus Mortuary which is a -- well, I don’t have words to describe this band you have to see it for yourself. (laughs)

The sludge and doom scene in Singapore is pretty small even within the heavy music scene here (might be the insane laws against drugs but who knows eh?) however the bands that are currently holding up the banner are killer, check out Marijannah, Hrvst and Beelzebud!

Thank you so much for visiting with Doomed & Stoned! We wish you much success now and in the future.

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to some music coming out of a dot in the world map! I am humbled and grateful for this opportunity and may The Doomed and Stoned Show last for many seasons to come!

God Luck and Good Speed.

The Great Axis Mundi Giveaway!

Come one, come all! Get your own copy of 'The Depths' (2019) by Axis Mundi by grabbing one of the available download codes below. Hurry, these will go quickly! Redeem them here.

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[justforbooks]

REBECCA CHAPMAN, who has a master of arts in English and comparative literature from Columbia University, hit bottom professionally last summer when she could not even get a job that did not pay. Vying for an internship at a boutique literary agency in Manhattan, Ms. Chapman, 25, had gone on three separate interviews with three people on three different days. “They couldn’t even send me an e-mail telling me I didn’t get it,” she said. 

It’s a story familiar to anyone seeking to break into the New York publishing world. Willie Osterweil, 25, an aspiring novelist who graduated magna cum laude from Cornell in 2009, found himself sweeping Brooklyn movie theaters for $7.25 an hour. And the closest that Helena Fitzgerald, a recent Columbia graduate, got was an interview at a top magazine, during which the editor dismissed her literary career dreams, telling her, “C’mon, that’s not realistic.”

Which explains, in a way, how they all ended up on a crisp November night, huddled together at an invitation-only party at a cramped, bookshelved apartment on the Upper East Side.

It was the weekly meeting of The New Inquiry, a scrappy online journal and roving clubhouse that functions as an Intellectuals Anonymous of sorts for desperate members of the city’s literary underclass barred from the publishing establishment. Fueled by B.Y.O.B. bourbon, impressive degrees and the angst that comes with being young and unmoored, members spend their hours filling the air with talk of Edmund Wilson and poststructuralism.

Lately, they have been catching the eye of the literary elite, earning praise that sounds as extravagantly brainy as the thesis-like articles that The New Inquiry uploads every few days.

“They’re the precursor of this kind of synthesis of extrainstitutional intellectualism, native to the Internet, native to the city dweller,” said the novelist Jonathan Lethem, an early champion.

“They’re not trapped within an old paradigm,” he added. “They’re just making it their own.”

The New Inquiry is edited by Rachel Rosenfelt, 26, who graduated from Barnard College in 2009. Though she had some luck finding work, her exposure to the literary establishment left her unimpressed. “It killed my interest in publishing,” she said of her internship at The New Yorker during her freshman year. “It just felt like they had all ‘arrived.’ It was boring. No one talked. The only real rule was, ‘Don’t mess this up.’ ”

Young, Web-savvy and idealistic, she and two friends — Jennifer Bernstein and Mary Borkowski — wanted to create their generation’s version of cultural criticism, equally versed in Theodor Adorno and Britney Spears. Finding contributors was easy: their social circle was filled with overeducated, underemployed postgrads willing to work free to be heard on subjects like Kanye West’s effect on the proletarian meta-narrative of hip-hop.

After earning a master’s and writing on a farm in upstate New York, Ms. Chapman returned to the city uncertain about what to do next.

“I met Rachel on one of my first days back,” she said, “and she was like, ‘Be our new literary editor.’ ”

There was no thought of turning a profit. But who cared? No one was making any money on the traditional path, anyway.  

“There’s something incredibly liberating,” Ms. Rosenfelt  said, “when you realize that climbing that ladder is a ladder to nowhere.”

Ms. Chapman added: “My whole life, I had been doing everything everybody told me. I went to the right school. I got really good grades. I got all the internships. Then, I couldn’t do anything.”

Ms. Rosenfelt and her collaborators envisioned a kind of literary salon reminiscent of the Lost Generation of the 1920s. So once a week, about 20 of The New Inquirer’s contributors and guests gather at an unmarked clandestine bookstore, a sort of literary speakeasy, in a second-floor, three-room apartment on the Upper East Side.

At 9 p.m. on a recent Thursday, Ms. Rosenfelt, wearing a black sweater, miniskirt and combat boots, appeared behind a blue door in the unimposing prewar apartment building. The door creaked open to reveal a disheveled space that looked like a used-book store in any college town, with shelves of yellowing volumes of Dostoyevsky and Camus reaching to the ceiling and air thick with the musty smell of stale tobacco and old paperbacks.

This space belongs to a bookseller in his 50s, the godfather for The New Inquiry, a man with bushy brows and the affably abstruse mien of a coffeehouse intellectual. (He asked that his name and identifying details not be published because his building prohibits a shop in the space.) He opens only by invitation, when he feels like it.

Ms. Rosenfelt described meeting there as a form of “urban hacking.”

For the first hour, attendees, most in their mid-20s and many dressed in untucked oxford shirts and off-brand jeans, mingled around a rickety table packed with half-empty Jim Beam bottles.

Despite the fact that everyone was young and attractive, no one seemed to flirt or network. Instead, they traded heady banter about the Situationists and reveled in an atmosphere of warmhearted mutual support; it felt like an oral dissertation mixed with a ’70s encounter group. 

At one point, a few debated, only half-ironically, whether a new bank in a former Dunkin Donuts nearby was philosophically akin to the French reactionaries’ construction of the Sacré Coeur basilica on the site of the Paris Commune’s insurrection in 1870.

Then, around 10 p.m., Ms. Rosenfelt called everyone into the main room. The highlight of each salon is a group reading in which each person selects a three-minute reading on the predetermined topic.

“We’re reading about ‘failed revolutions’ tonight,” Ms. Rosenfelt reminded the crowd. She started with a passage from “To the Finland Station,” “in which Edmund Wilson couches the inevitable failure of Marxism in Edmund Wilson’s idea of the national and ethnic identity of Marx.”

The room exploded in vaudeville-style hoots.

Continuing around the circle, Ms. Fitzgerald, the would-be magazine writer, read from “The Cantos,” by Ezra Pound. Mr. Osterweil, the frustrated novelist, read from Guy Debord’s “Society of the Spectacle.” Tim Barker, a junior at Columbia, awkwardly admitted that he, too, had chosen a reading from Debord. (What are the odds?)

One young attendee offered a reading from Gustave Flaubert’s “Sentimental Education.”

“A lot of this book takes place during the revolutions of 1848,” he explained. “The part that I think has a good point for revolutionaries is how quickly a failed revolution can descend into careerism.”

The word hung in the air, as noxious as cigarette smoke.

DESPITE its slacker-revolutionary spirit, The New Inquiry is starting to tiptoe toward the publishing mainstream.

With an audience that understands references to consumerism as “a hedonic treadmill,” many articles in The New Inquiry make The Paris Review look like a beach read. Arch and often aggressively leftist, the articles dance effortlessly from Jacques Derrida to Lady Gaga.

Recent pieces include a review of Ben Jeffery’s “Anti-Matter”; a critical survey of the novels of the French provocateur Michel Houellebecq; an essay on the class struggle portrayed in “Rise of the Planet of the Apes”; and a personal piece by Malcolm Harris, a young writer who recalled growing up in the suburbs and finding sanctuary in Borders.

The journal counts cultural savants like Todd Gitlin, Douglas Rushkoff and Mark Greif, a founder of N + 1, as early champions, and articles have been linked on Andrew Sullivan’s Daily Beast blog and the National Public Radio Web site. Even barbs by the establishment elicit pride, like when James Wolcott of Vanity Fair called Mr. Osterweil’s film criticism “Maoist” on Twitter.

On Sunday, the journal is to make a social debut of sorts among the city’s literary A-list, organizing — in partnership with the publisher New Directions, Google and others — a marathon reading of Frederic Tuten’s novel “The Adventures of Mao on the Long March,” featuring 60 readers, including writers like A. M. Homes, Kurt Andersen and Oscar Hijuelos, at the Jane hotel in the West Village.

And even though staff members routinely serve up gloomy eulogies over the “death of print,” the publication plans to roll out a quarterly print edition next year, along with an iPad magazine for $2 a month. Its breakout stars are even starting to climb publishing’s “ladder to nowhere.”

Atossa Abrahamian, 25, an editor, has written for New York Magazine. Sarah Leonard, 23, is an associate editor at Dissent. Mr. Harris, 22, who was sifting through grad-school rejection notices a year ago, has written for N + 1 and Utne Reader and has been called out by Glenn Beck on television. 

This is not to say that the generational angst fueling The  New Inquiry is likely to vanish soon. At the most recent salon two weeks ago, Will Canine, the operations director, showed up with 5 o’clock shadow after spending 35 hours in jail following his arrest at the Occupy Wall Street protests. 

Tim Barker, a junior at Columbia, said he was drawn to the salons for the chance to “discuss ideas at an extremely high level, without worrying about status or material support of traditional institutions: publishing houses or universities.” He added, though, that while he aspires to be a history professor, he was “extremely conscious of the contraction of job opportunities” in publishing and academia.

Inside the bookstore, however, the turmoil of the outside world seemed far away. The lights were low, the conversation crackling.  

“This is my fantasy: a room full of books, people talking about books — it smells like books,” explained Ms. Chapman, the journal’s literary editor. “It’s the literary community that I had read about when I was younger. It’s Moveable Feast-type stuff.”

Despite her upbeat take on the proceedings, Ms. Chapman admitted she wasn’t feeling chipper. It was her birthday. A happy occasion? For most, maybe — but not, she explained, when you are turning 25, having graduated summa from Cornell, with a master’s from Columbia, only to find yourself unemployed and back living at home with your parents.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

[thesportssoundoff]

“Canada, UFC, October filler” The UFC Fight Night From Moncton Preview

Joey

October 21st, 2018

If you remove the prelim slates (which aren't necessarily fight nights) and throw in the FOX card in December, we're officially at JUST five shows remaining for the UFC on Fox Sports. One day we'll all have a chit chat about how that relationship changed the sport (for the better or the worse) but in the meantime and in between time, let's look at what is by far the weakest of the five cards with a UFC trip into Moncton, New Brunswick, Canada.  It's a bit of a bummer the UFC canned Tom Wright long before we got to this point because he was pushing for New Brunswick to get a show for a long time. They finally got there and the card---is a card. The UFC's problem is that they basically have zero big time Canadians available and they booked TWO Canadian cards in close proximity SO what do you think happens there? The good Canadians go to the PPV and the other ones wind up here. What's more, what IS a fair card for a place like Moncton anyways? With Colorado, New York, Toronto, Las Vegas, Australia, China, Argentina and Milwaukee all on the docket, I think it's fair to suggest that New Brunswick is the weakest of the markets presented and as such, they kind of got the short end. At least Argentina got what should be a tremendous main event with hometown dude Santiago Ponzinibbio getting the headline spot. Moncton gets a really good LHW fight, some pretty solid undercard stuff here or there but overall, this is the sort of card I'd be giving Fox if I was dipping out in a year. Then again I'm petty like that. Despite the somewhat lukewarm lead in, I've got plenty to chit chat about here so get up on here and have a good old time!

Fights: 13

Debuts:  Johnathan Martinez, Te Edwards, Don Madge, Chris Fishgold

Fight Changes/Injury Cancellations: 2 (Zubaira Tukhogov OUT, Michael Johnson IN vs Artem Lobov/Gavin Tucker OUT, Jonathan Martinez IN vs Andre Soukhamthath)

Headliners (fighters who have either main evented or co-main evented shows in the UFC): 8 (Volkan Oezdemir, Anthony Smith, Michael Johnson, Artem Lobov, Misha Cirkunov, Patrick Cummins, Gian Villante, Stevie Ray)

Fighters On Losing Streaks in the UFC: (Misha Cirkunov, Artem Lobov,  Ed Herman, Court McGee, Talita Bernado, Stevie Ray)

Fighters On Winning Streaks in the UFC: (Anthony Smith)

Main Card Record Since Jan 1st 2016 (in the UFC): 25-28 (!!!!!!!!!!!!!, This is the first one of these I've done where the main card record is OFFICIALLY below .500. I guess we can blame Court McGee and Gian Villante for that.)

Volkan Oezdemir- 3-1 Anthony Smith- 6-2 Michael Johnson- 2-3 Artem Lobov- 2-3 Misha Cirkunov- 3-2 Pat Cummins- 2-2 Jonathan Martinez- 0-0 Andre  Soukhamthat- 1-3 Gian Villante- 2-4 Ed Herman- 1-2 Alex Garcia- 2-3 Court McGee- 1-3

Divisional Breakdown:

Light Heavyweight- 3

Lightweight- 3

Welterweight- 2

Featherweight- 2

Heavyweight- 1

Bantamweight- 1

Women's Bantmweight- 1

Too Low- Marcelo Golm vs Arjan Bhullar

Take your pick actually. With Gian Villante/Ed Herman, Alex Garcia/Court McGee and even Johnathan Martinez/Andre Soukhamthath, there's plenty to move off the main card. The FS1 prelims have a few fights that are better; namely the likes of Chris Fishgold vs Calvin Kattar and "This should be on a Euro Fight Pass card" in Thibault Gouti vs Nasrat Haqparast. Either way be that as it may or may not, I'm actually rolling with Fight Pass HW bout Arjan Bhullar vs Marcelo Golm. Bhullar being on Fight Pass is a consistently weird deal BUT him vs Golm is actually a pretty intriguing fight between HW prospects. That's more important to me than Ed Herman vs Gian Villante or the McGee fight. Besides with three LHW fights on the main card, they already decided this was going to be a "big" card with size as the impetus. Might as well give your audience the big boys and go whole hog am I right?

Too High Up- Alex Garcia vs Court McGee

Again half of this main card is just sort of kind of wasteful filler so you could pick just about anything here outside of the main, the co-main and Cummins/Cirkunov. I just don't see the reason why  this fight is on the main card. McGee is on a losing streak and BARELY holding onto his spot in the organization while Alex Garcia fights more often than not tend to be drab affairs. This fight isn't relevant at 170 lbs, it's probably not going to be exciting and it feels like a very transparent loser leaves town type gimmick. Just don't see why this is here.

Stat Monitor for 2018:

Debuting Fighters (Current number: 27-33-1):  Chris Fishgold, Jonathan Martinez, Te Edwards, Dan Madge

Short Notice Fighters (Current number: 26-19):  Jonathan Martinez, Michael Johnson

Second Fight (Current number: 35-27):

Cage Corrosion (Current number: 19-31):  Artem Lobov, Ed Herman, Jessin Ayari

Undefeated Fighters (Current number: 29-21-1):

Keeping An Eye On But Not Really:

The UFC Win Check Test The records of fighters who have 4 or more UFC fights (or three full calendar years in the organization) but 0 wins against people still in the UFC:  Artem Lobov, Thibault Gouti

Twelve Precarious Ponderings

1- Has Dominick Reyes made fights like these borderline irrelevant? Some would argue that this was irrelevant to begin with but that sort of no sells the chaotic and frenzied stupidity of 205 lbs. We're talking about a division that has had two dudes as champion since 2014 but about 6 different interim/vacated title fights in the process. There's always a desire for newness at 205 lbs and the fact that Jones and DC run through most of the guys either in the top 10 or previously occupying spots in the top 10 opens up the door for a fast ascending LHW to sneak his way into title talk. With Dominick Reyes on the scene, you can't help but feel like he's the guy one way or another to put himself into that position. For better or for worse, Reyes is the guy who will face Jones or DC or just take the title when both dudes disappear from fighting forever. As such, even the normally somewhat solid cry of "This COULD be a #1 contender fight!" falls flat here. It's just a good LHW fight that's being asked to become relevant enough for people to go out of their way to see it.

2- Anthony Smith has had a long fighting career (and could be one of those Ellenberger/Mein guys who eventually hits the wall a lot sooner than his contemporaries will) but his run in the UFC at 205 lbs is actually pretty flimsy. The best LHW he fought was Thiago Santos when they were both middleweights in a fight that Santos won in violent and emphatic fashion. His wins at 205 lbs are over Rashad Evans and Shogun Rua; two names that saw their best days at least 5-10 years ago. Both fights ended in the first round and showcased what Smith does well but hid his weaknesses pretty comfortably. In a weird way, Smith and Volkan Oezdemir are similar stories. Both came from weight classes other than 205 lbs (Oezdemir was training for a HW title fight when he got the call to face OSP on short notice) and their run to the top of the division always had a weird sense of smoke and mirrors to it. Oezdemir's Cinderella Man style run came to an end vs Daniel Cormier in a fight where the element of danger for Volkan was gone early and Cormier's pressure and all around skill level just wore him out. It'll be interesting to see if Smith, not exactly known as a cardio terror at 185 lbs, can handle a guy like Volkan leaning on him if this fight gets a bit long in the tooth.

3- Is the winner of this fight on a nudge nudge wink wink short list IF Gus or Jones is hurt?

4- This sure feels like the sort of fight Michael Johnson finds a way to lose and I find that unsettling.

5- A year ago around this time, Misha Cirkunov was coming off his first UFC loss in stunning shocking fashion BUT conversely the Volkan Oezdemir buzz was sky high so in theory, it all evened out. Now Volkan has basically disappeared from the radar (through factors not entirely in his control) and Misha is coming off his second straight loss in a blow out vs Glover Teixeira. I don't know if it's fair to sound the bust alarm yet but Cirkunov is getting the sort of soft touch that suggests they're attempting a market correction.Pat Cummins isn't going to give Cirkunov problems on the feet and he probably (?) can't take him down either BUT he can at the very least stick around long enough to give Cirkunov some problems. A loss here and you can sound the alarm.

6- Calvin Kattar started the year in a premier spot for a UFC PPV, taking on Shane Burgos in an upset win. He followed that up in April with a "No shame in that" loss to Renato Moicano and returns on the PRELIMS here vs Chris Fishgold. It's actually a really good fight and far better than at least half of the stuff on the main card. Somehow it's here on the prelims and the only guess I can make is that Kattar has an expiring contract and the UFC's not running the risk of him winning on the main card without some comfort for him re-signing. Very excited for Chris Fishgold as well as he's one of the better Cage Warriors signings the UFC has made. It's of course fair to point out that some Cage Warriors champs have gone bust recently but I don't think Fishgold is going to follow in that pattern.

7- Where does Alex Garcia rank among the all time hyped signings to never pan out? Think plenty of us got drawn offsides there.

8- Speaking of weird prelim fights, Nasrat Haqparast vs Thibault Gouti should probably be higher up. Gouti gave Sage Northcutt all he could handle in a "showcase the star" fight but like most guys set up on the other side of those, Gouti found a way to lose. Nasrat Haqparast as a lot of Kelvin Gastelum qualities (even looks like him) and was absolutely dynamic in running through Marc Diakiese in his sophomore outing for the UFC. I'd rather watch Haqparast ice Gouti in a round than see Alex Garcia vs Court McGee.

9- Let's just be fair to Court McGee here. McGee overcame an addiction to heroin and a lack of natural talent (let's be fair) to have a long career in the UFC. He won TUF over dudes like Brad Tavares, Nick Ring, Chris Camozzi and Kyle Noke and has won fights in the UFC plus he got to be a part of a show in his hometown. He's more than overachieved and deserves a ton of credit. I just don't have a lot of interest in this fight.  He also has a win (disputed as it may be) over Robert Whittaker.

10- Stevie Ray is also on the Fight Pass prelims which is weird I guess. The UFC's love of Scotland has come and gone seemingly but Ray is a quality 155er who is better than "guy who kicks off the Fight Pass slate on the card." What weird slotting.

11- Nordine Taleb vs Sean Strickland sounds like a miserable viewing experience.

12-How many guys on this main card are still with the UFC a year from now?

[your-dietician]

Bare Feet, Beer and Heavy Metal Bangers: Golf Chills Out and Gets Cool.

New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/golf/bare-feet-beer-and-heavy-metal-bangers-golf-chills-out-and-gets-cool/

Bare Feet, Beer and Heavy Metal Bangers: Golf Chills Out and Gets Cool.

Golf is one of the world’s oldest sports, with treasured traditions honed across several centuries. But increasingly over the last decade, many people have come to see golf as just plain old. And not in a good way.

The number of devoted recreational golfers in the United States has hovered at about 25 million, but the cohort is aging and more than 1,600 American golf courses closed in the 2010s. In 2004, and over the next 14 consecutive years, participation on courses waned.

These days, however, a fresh breeze is billowing through golf’s fusty clubhouse. It is not a stretch to call this movement the new golf. And new golf just might save old golf from itself.

It has helped power three successive years of participation growth that has reshaped the demographics of junior recreational golfers, who are now twice as likely to be female and four times as likely not to be white.

New golf has led to radically revised six- or 12-hole courses that reduce costs, land use and the time it takes to play a round. It has fostered a host of off-course experiences, including bustling entertainment venues that mix the vibe of a driving range and a sports bar, attracting a clientele with an average age of 31. It has meant golf courses with built-in sound systems playing music and with rounds in which no one keeps score — or cares to. Most conspicuously, in a sport in which 75 percent of the rounds are played on public golf courses, old-school protocol has been relaxed to stimulate a spirit of inclusion.

On a sunny evening this spring in northern Florida, Mike Miles, a 59-year-old former PGA Tour player who helped convert a failing conventional golf course into a quirky 12-hole public golf playground called The Yards, gazed out his window and noticed a young man on the first tee in bare feet.

“I’m thrilled to see him,” a smiling Miles said of the golfer, who was in his 20s and beginning a three-hole round known as the beer loop because it starts and ends next to the clubhouse bar. “We have to make golf not so serious.”

Top players agree.

“Whatever they want to do, they’re playing golf and that’s great,” said Jordan Spieth, who is 27 and has won three major championships. “I’ve got friends from high school and college, and they don’t keep their scores. They’re just going out to play music and have a few beers. They love it.”

Though such change might have been viewed as a threat to traditional golf 10 years ago, the sport’s leaders have now embraced relaxation.

“Offering more flavors of golf is tapping into evolutional demands,” Joe Beditz, the longtime president and chief executive of the National Golf Foundation, said. “It suits the predominant culture and is good for the game.”

Ashleigh McLaughlin, a former college golfer, is an executive with Youth on Course, a program that has subsidized more than one million rounds, bringing prices down to $5 or less. She said that conventional golf was being expanded, not replaced.

“Like most corners of the world, golf has had this kind of awakening when it relates to diversity and inclusion,” said McLaughlin, who is Black. “People can play golf in traditional ways, but there’s other ways to enjoy the game, whether you play barefoot, play music and don’t wear a polo shirt. There’s no judgment for that within the golf space.”

Like all uprisings, the sport’s mini-rebellion had a birthplace: Northern Virginia, where a golf entertainment company named Topgolf made its American debut in 2005. It has since swelled to 64 locations, the majority in or near urban areas. Topgolf facilities, which average more than 20 million customers annually, have the feel of a 1950s-style bowling alley set in a 21st century science fiction film.

While a Topgolf complex resembles a routine golf driving range, albeit one with multiple floors, it is meant to be a social experience. The goal is playful competition at each oversize driving bay, where a wait staff keeps customers plied with food and drink. Players choose from a full set of clubs to aim at targets of varying distances — from 50 to 250 yards — and sensors read a microchip embedded in each golf ball. Points are awarded according to how close the balls come to the targets and are displayed on large touch-screen monitors in each bay.

Laughter, not the imposing silence at a typical golf tee, is the prevalent soundtrack.

The secret to Topgolf’s booming popularity is a come-as-you-are atmosphere that has attracted people who don’t play the traditional game. Industry leaders once spurned Topgolf as “not real golf.” They now realize that Topgolf found a way to capitalize on a latent interest in the sport. (Television ratings for golf tournaments have been strong for decades even as it was understood that a large portion of the viewing audience did not play.)

“Topgolf took the friction out of the entry to golf and made it easy for people to satisfy their interest in the game without making a big investment,” said David Pillsbury, chief executive of ClubCorp, which owns or operates more than 200 golf clubs.

Pillsbury and his brethren in the golf community now view every Topgolf as a recruiting outpost, because industry studies have shown that a substantial number of first-time golfers got their start at a Topgolf or one of its many competitors, like Drive Shack, Big Shots and indoor simulators. The growing customer base at such sites is nearly 13 million and 45 percent female, according to the National Golf Foundation, and is increasingly drawn from more diverse and urban neighborhoods.

Next year, Topgolf, which recently merged with Callaway for $2 billion, will take a symbolically important step when it opens its first facility in partnership with an established, if flagging, nine-hole municipally owned golf course west of Los Angeles.

The course, in the coastal city of El Segundo, Calif., has been redesigned, and floodlights will be added for nighttime play. The property may become a model that proves that a modern golf entertainment venue can convert its customers into green-grass players.

The innovative spirit of the El Segundo project reflects a nationwide yearning for places to play that are unlike the stereotypical country club.

At Quicksands, a par-3 course positioned atop a stretch of sand dunes in Central Washington, the music of Metallica emanating from widely scattered speakers hints that a round will not follow tradition.

So might the advice that using a putter off the tee is the best option for the longest of Quicksands’s holes, which drops steeply downhill for 180 yards from tee to green. The entire layout, linked to the 18-hole Gamble Sands resort, can be traversed in 90 minutes with only a few clubs in hand.

A sign near the entrance sums up the vibe: Imagination on display.

Even Tiger Woods, sidelined by serious injuries sustained in a February car crash, is in on the alternative golf boom. He has become the co-owner of an expanding, technologically advanced chain of mini-golf courses. Each of Woods’s Popstroke putting courses, with multiple holes that incorporate bunkers and rough, offers food, craft beer, wine and ice cream that can be delivered to participants during play. There are two venues currently open in Florida, and this month Woods announced that his company would develop seven more courses, including sites in Texas and Arizona.

If Woods is the headliner in the experimentation category now overtaking recreational golf, Rob Collins, once a relative nobody, might now be the guru of the movement.

Seven years ago, Collins emptied his bank account to build an architecturally distinctive nine-hole course in eastern Tennessee, which was no one’s idea of a golf mecca. Collins did not have the money to build a clubhouse for his new course, called Sweetens Cove. Nor could he afford a bathroom. A portable toilet and a 20-foot-by-10-foot aluminum shed greeted golfers on opening day in 2014.

Business was slow, but another phenomenon — social media — helped spread the word of Sweetens Cove’s eccentric charm, which is a mix of playability and winsome challenges for golfers of all abilities. Influential golf websites like The Fried Egg and the popular Twitter account No Laying Up raved about Sweetens Cove’s unconventional allure and minimalist approach.

A cult attraction was born, as golfers from around the world happily made the pilgrimage into the Tennessee countryside 30 miles west of Chattanooga. Soon, Sweetens Cove was ranked among the top new American golf courses.

In March, when Sweetens Cove opened its online booking system for this year, it took 31 minutes for every available tee time Thursdays through Sundays from April 1 to Oct. 31 to sell out.

“We’ve become an international golf destination without the benefit of food and beverage, lodging or indoor plumbing,” Collins, 46, said with a laugh in May. “Led by younger generations, golf is refocusing. They crave compelling golf, and old assumptions about location, length and the configuration of the golf holes no longer apply.”

Collins and his design partner, Tad King, have become hot commodities with a slew of projects completed and planned.

“In those dark days around 2016, I never would’ve guessed that would happen,” Collins said. “But here we are.”

Buttressing the new golf movement has been a surge in the number of junior golfers who are flocking to restyled instruction programs. About 34 percent of junior golfers are now girls, compared with only 15 percent in 2000.

Jennifer Bermingham heads a step-by-step junior academy program called Crush It, which has been established at nearly 120 Club Corp courses from Virginia to California. Though the instruction is for boys and girls, Bermingham has girls learn in female-only groups.

“Girls like to work together and become friends and want to have a social element to the game and to practice,” said Bermingham, who is a certified P.G.A. and L.P.G.A. instructor. “There are always exceptions, but boys like to compete with each other and want to see who’s the winner. There’s a mentality that is just slightly different.”

New programs like Crush It have bolstered longstanding ones like The First Tee and Girls Golf, a partnership of the L.P.G.A. Foundation and the United States Golf Association that has taught the game to millions of young golfers in more than 2,000 locations.

According to data compiled last year by the National Golf Foundation, more than 25 percent of junior golfers are nonwhite, whereas just 6 percent of young golfers 21 years ago were.

Golf’s cultural revolution can be seen in every facet of the game, perhaps most noticeably in the relaxing of dress codes. Once demanding collared shirts, women’s skirts of a certain length and no hats turned backward, golf is chilling out.

Rules are being rewritten around the nation, most especially at the public courses that make up three-fourths of the sport’s inventory. To be sure, not every country club has altered its restrictions, but in many cases, only denim pants and tank tops are prohibited.

“Having to tuck in your shirt or turn your hat forwards, those things have to go away,” said Laura Scrivner, general manager of the Capital Canyon Club in Prescott, Ariz., which is operated by Troon, a worldwide golf management company. “There has to be a lighter touch now.”

Scrivner is particularly dedicated to rethinking golf’s protocols — she once ran a golf tournament called “Meet, Greet and Cheat,” which encouraged players to break every golf rule — and she has not let convention stand in the way at Capital Canyon, which is private.

JP Sipla, a 44-year-old member, is one of those golfers who plays his rounds barefoot. He calls himself a golf purist and plays to an enviable seven handicap, but his first question before joining Capital Canyon was whether he would be forced to wear shoes.

Assured there were no footwear regulations, he found himself on the club’s first tee not long afterward.

“There might have been someone cracking a joke about being barefoot, but it was lighthearted,” Sipla said in a telephone interview. “I’ve been here about a year now. Everyone knows me and they lovingly call me ‘Barefoot.’”

One of Sipla’s fellow members, Dave Dove, who is 89 and was introduced to golf by his father in the 1940s, welcomes the change he has seen in the game he still plays three times a week.

“You don’t want everybody to look the same and act the same,” Dove said. “That’s not what life is like. A golf course is a big place, there’s plenty of room for everybody. We’re just out there to have a good time.”

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[johnboothus]

Nick Jonas and John Varvatos on Fashion Friendship and the Future of Villa One Tequila

It’s not unusual to see collaborations between creative people. In fact, put creatives in a room and often sparks happen from a simple conversation. That’s exactly what happened when iconic men’s fashion designer John Varvatos met worldwide pop star Nick Jonas at a party a few years ago. The two hit it off, bonded over music and fashion, and a friendship began. Then they put it to work.

Their first two projects under the JV x NJ label — a Varvatos capsule collection including leather jackets and knitwear that was followed by a cologne — debuted in 2018. Wanting to continue working together, they thought about their next venture. Clearly, a natural next step was tequila. So, as any pair of celebrities interested in creating a new tequila brand does, this duo spent time in Jalisco, Mexico. They partnered with the Stoli Group’s Fabrica de Tequilas Finos distillery, where they worked with Stoli’s master distiller Arturo Fuentes, who has three decades of distilling experience. He applied his chemical engineering background to making quality spirits, first working with Cognac, Champagne, and rum — eventually focusing on premium tequila in 2000.

In Tequila, they worked with Fuentes to perfect a taste profile that embodied the vibe of what became the brand’s tagline, “Life as it should be.” After the emotional rollercoaster of a year that we’ve collectively experienced, isn’t that something we should all embrace? Sipping a glass of quality tequila, dreaming of life as it should be — why not?

In late October 2019, Villa One launched first in New York, followed by Illinois, California, and Florida with silver, reposado, and añejo bottlings. Since then, it has earned a number of awards and accolades including the SIP Awards 2020 Platinum, Silver, and Double Gold medals for its silver, reposado, and añejo, respectively. Today, Villa One has national distribution in stores, online, and in restaurants. The brand also recently entered the Canadian market.

Here, we talk with Varvatos and Jonas about how they got into tequila, where they see the future of Villa One heading, and Jonas’s new obsession with, of all things, checkers.

1. What’s the drink that made you fall in love with drinking?

Varvatos: I was traveling in Mexico in college and fell in love with Margaritas. It actually really turned me on to tequila in a time where most people thought it was fire water if it wasn’t covered up with mixes.

Jonas: I think a great glass of wine is always wonderful, and was kind of the first introduction I had to the brilliant craftsmanship that goes into creating something like a wonderful wine or tequila.

2. How did you meet and become friends?

Varvatos: We met at a dinner in New York and talked for hours. The next day, we got together to listen to some of Nick’s new music and we knew that day that we would become fast friends and collaborators.

3. How or why did you get into tequila — and so much so that you wanted to launch your own brand together?

Varvatos: I’ve loved tequila for most of my drinking life. Every time Nick and I were together, we shared our love for tequila and were inspired to create an ultra-premium tequila that was best in class, but still accessible in price.

Jonas: I was first drawn to tequila because of the low-carb, sugar, and calorie intake — as a diabetic and a person that cares about fitness and trying to keep a lower calorie count. Then, I learned more about the way it was made and distilled — and then we worked with Arturo Fuentes, our master distiller; he taught us a lot along the way that got us even more interested.

4. What did you like most about the process to create Villa One? What was the hardest part about it?

Varvatos: I loved everything about the process, from growing and harvesting the agave, to the cooking and distilling; but most of all, creating a super-smooth, unique taste profile. I truly enjoyed learning everything we could about tequila.

Jonas: I think the best part about creating this tequila was getting to work with my good friend, John Varvatos, and bringing to life the vision we had based on a few conversations about what we wanted this brand to represent. Obviously, the biggest piece of that puzzle was making sure we did our best to be top of class. Each bottle was made with a lot of care, focus, and attention to detail. The hardest part about the process was just getting the liquid right. We went through about an 18-month process, back and forth between where John was in New York and I was in Los Angeles, and obviously our distillery, and getting the blend just right, to where we were all very happy — and I think we got there.

5. Your tequila is great for straight-up sipping neat, or on the rocks, but also for cocktails. What’s your preferred style? And what’s your go-to cocktail, with which of your tequilas?

Varvatos: My preferred style are simple drinks. I love the taste of our tequila and don’t want to mask it.

Jonas: I love it neat. That’s the purest form, obviously, but during lockdown I got really into making cocktails and making recipes. One of my favorite things was using our silver for a Bloody Maria or a Spicy Margarita. Also, infusing some chocolate bitters into the reposado and añejo to pull out the great chocolate notes.

6. What’s your desert island drink?

Varvatos: Villa One Reposado with a slice of orange and fresh-squeezed lime. Simple, delicious, refreshing, and healthy!

Jonas: Villa One Reposado on the rocks, club soda, and an orange wedge.

7. What do you like to drink when you’re not drinking tequila?

Varvatos: Other than tequila, I like to drink sake.

Jonas: When I’m not drinking tequila, I like wine or beer. Those are my primary drinks outside of tequila, and the occasional mezcal as well.

8. What’s the best and worst bottle in your fridge, bar, or kitchen right now?

Varvatos: I have a bottle of Hakkaisan sake that I had with my grilled salmon last night. Superb!

9. You’re both pretty famous, but what’s something interesting or quirky most people don’t know about you — like a trait or something you’re interested in culturally?

Jonas: I recently got really into checkers and I have an app on my phone that is basically teaching me along the way. I’ve been really loving to get to know more about that; it’s an incredibly tricky game, and complex. But when you play it with friends, you also get to know a lot about the person you are playing with.

10. What’s the best thing that happened to you during Covid quarantine?

Varvatos: The silver lining for me was spending the most quality time ever with my family.

Jonas: I think the best thing that happened was just getting to spend more time with my wife [actress Priyanka Chopra] and our dogs. Being forced to stay home opened up a lot of pathways for me creatively in the music space — and also screenwriting and [other] things I’m doing there.

11. I want to flip things on you:

John, rock ’n’ roll has inspired your designs and you clearly are a music fan. What’s the best concert you’ve ever seen and why?

Varvatos: Best concert was when I was in college and saw Led Zeppelin. Their music and fashion sense truly had an effect on [my] creative senses that lasts until this day.

And Nick, you’re a musician, but also known for your fashion. What’s a piece of clothing you can’t part with or that evokes a special memory and why?

Jonas: I think for me, clothing is all about feeling confident and feeling your best. For me a great suit has a lot of sentimental value; if I wore it to an event, time with friends or family, those can be really meaningful memories.

12. What does the future look like for Villa One? Any special barrel aging or introducing a mezcal?

Varvatos: We are just in the beginning and approaching our second year, but it’s been terrific so far. So, the next step is creating some limited-edition unique barrel-aged runs.

Jonas: The future looks very bright. We’re so excited about the early fan base we have cultivated just having launched about a year and a half ago. The people who have tried it really love it and we’re so excited to continue to grow that and see more and more people make Villa One their top choice.

The article Nick Jonas and John Varvatos on Fashion, Friendship, and the Future of Villa One Tequila appeared first on VinePair.

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[mattbrothersscriptwriter]

My Top 20 Films of 2017 - Part Two

Ok, so about ten minutes ago I finished watching my last 2017 film of the year. For my FULL list - all 127 films watched in order of preference - jump on over to my Letterboxd page: https://letterboxd.com/matt_bro/list/films-of-the-year-2017/

Alright, top 10:

10. Logan

In a time when a lot of people still bemoan the existence of so many comic book movies (occasionally, with a point) this has been a stellar year for them. Marvel’s triple whammy of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, Spiderman Homecoming and Thor Ragnarok were all excellent, heartfelt, fun knockouts and Wonder Woman was a terrific showcase for both Gal Gadot and Patty Jenkins (not to mention hugely important in its own right). Only Justice League really fell back on old tired habits and resulted in a bizarre mashup of tone and purpose and featured the single most damning piece of CGI buffoonery ever conceived in Henry Cavill’s ‘we’ll fix it in post’ deleted moustache. That really is one for the ages.

But I could never have foreseen the power and beauty of something like Logan, a near-perfect capper to a spinoff trilogy that began with the God-awful Wolverine Origins. It’s strengths come from it’s convictions – this isn’t an episodic story servicing a franchise, this is a true stand alone character piece, focusing on the rarest of things – an actual ending to a beloved, previously untouchable, immortal superhero. Played out as a tragic western with claws, the film beautifully champions the importance of family and love, seen (at last) through the eyes of those that never dreamed they would experience it, let alone fight for it. With some fantastic action set pieces to boot too, this one really has its cake and its eat and is also a real sight to behold – I saw it for a second time in it’s gorgeous black and white ‘Logan Noir’ cut and every frame is a revelation. Huge props to Patrick Stewart too, delivering a devastating performance of a character is has also lived with for the past SEVENTEEN years.

9. Film Stars Don’t Die in Liverpool

This film is a heartbreaker. My God. Definitely the most surprising cinema-going experience I had this year. I went with a friend of mine and by the time the credits were rolling, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house – best encapsulated by a burly scouser sat behind us who was openly saying “Fuck me, didn’t expect that for a Sunday afternoon. Jesus! How bloody brilliant was that!? Got any tissues?’.

Focusing on the later years of Hollywood starlet Gloria Grahame (Annette Bening on Oscar sweeping form), it finds her semi-washed up and treading the boards in London where she meets and falls for Peter Gallagher (Jamie Bell – never better than this) another actor, half her age. The tenderness and straight forwardness of their pairing is so refreshing, never making an issue or point about the older woman/younger man dynamic unless directly challenged by other characters (including Gloria’s bratty sister Joy) or themselves. The most effective emotional beats of this film aren’t signposted and drawn out for Oscar clip schmaltzyness but instead hit you in a sudden burst of passionate regret; hurtful words said in anger or defence – truly proving that the most harmful things you can say to someone you love are all too easy to let slip out before you’ve had a chance to think about what you’re saying. But the damage is done.

The film-making here is exceptional too. What could have been a rather dry biopic is given such momentum through brilliantly executed scene transitions and a flashback-enhanced narrative that keeps us embroiled in the present day scenes of Gloria succumbing to cancer whilst we watch their initial courtships and brutal arguments from the months and years leading up to it. The supporting cast that includes Julie Walters, back as Bell’s mother and Stephen Graham as his brother are brilliant but this is Bening/Bell’s movie and they knock it out of the park.

8. Baby Driver

My big birthday blowout screening of the year, following last year’s Aliens 30th anniversary showing, Baby Driver did not let me down. All the usual energy, narrative foreshadowing and tightly controlled construction you’ve come to expect from an Edgar Wright flick blown out onto a much bigger and more confident scale. The genius pairing of getaway driver crime heist flick and vehicular musical allows for some hugely inventive set pieces, from the opening police chase set to Bellbottoms by the John Spencer Blues Explosion to the car-on-car parking lot duel with Queen’s Brighton Rock echoing through the tunnels.

Ansel Elgort delivers a breakout turn and everyone from Jon Hamm, Jamie Foxx and Kevin somebody-or-other are having a ball playing bad. The romance with waitress Lily James initially feels a little under cooked but it all plays into the escapist fairytale of the action and seeing them dance together in a laundromat whilst sharing headphones is one of this year’s purest joys.

7. Get Out

Where It soaked up much of the straight spooky horror acclaim this year, Get Out walked a much more tantalising and complex line between thriller, social drama, satire, comedy and horror – and pulled it all off effortlessly. Jordan Peele has long had grand cinematic aspirations as evidenced in some of the larger scale sketches in his fantastic show Key and Peele but this clearly represents everything he wanted to say and do in a debut feature. I think the odds of so perfectly nailing your voice and intentions in your very first film is astronomical but damn, he must be proud, not only of the film itself but the cultural reach, impact and resonance it has had with audiences.

Daniel Kaluuya is excellent as the everyman battling his own (rational) fears and paranoia before his instincts slowly become the domineering voice in the back of his head. Trust in oneself is the saving grace here and it’s great to see an array of other ‘traditional’ characters for this genre twist the knife and reveal their true colours. The “Rose, where are my keys” turning point is perhaps the tightest I’ve gripped the arm of my chair all year. And the eventual climax is one of the best examples of subverting expected genre tropes. Brilliant.

6. Raw

Speaking of confident debuts, Julia Ducournau’s is equally astounding. Not for the faint hearted, this queasy, cannibalistic coming of age tale is a near perfect slice of fucked up fever dream. It follows a young vegetarian attending veterinary college who is forced to eat rabbit meat in a sick hazing ritual – one that her fellow student and older sister has clearly already experienced. Slowly but surely, a triggering of her animalistic appetite grows, coinciding both with her own first steps into a sexual awakening as well as a growing sense of unease that something isn’t right in her family to begin with. 

The plot takes some nutty turns, not least in the last few minutes, but everything works; from the gorgeous imagery to the tonal juggling to the assured performances. This would make an excellent entry in an ‘arthouse does horror subgenre’ triple bill, doing for cannibals what A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night does for vampires and The Witch does for... witches.

5. Jackie

This is a breathtaking biopic - interested less in the broad strokes of history and what we think we know about the aftermath of one of the most infamous events of the 20th century and more in the nuanced, private, personal moments of grief in the public eye. Natalie Portman is astounding as Jackie Kennedy, nailing everything from the look to the voice to the affectations, and its the dreamlike, woozy way that the film unfolds that really draws you in and positions you in the eye of a hurricane. The JFK assassination was a monumental cultural milestone but this story asks you to put yourself in the shoes of a woman who was unavoidably trapped at ground zero - and largely all alone with her memories and emotions, despite the surrounding pressures of aides, the press and the American people.

This is supremely confident filmmaking, incredibly affecting and features another stand out score from Mica Under the Skin Levi.

4. 20th Century Women

The second film on my list for both Annette Bening and Greta Gerwig, this is a wonderful story about the strengths and flaws found in both the family we’re given and the family we choose. With an anecdotal, episodic structure, it is less focused on plot and more on the individual moments that the characters in our lives provide us with; how they affect our own life story and evoke memories of a certain time and place. 

It’s highly emotional, with touching asides and rambling voiceovers telling us numerous stories whilst keeping a sense of an anchor through the relationship between Jamie (Lucas Jade Zumann) and his mother Dorothea (Bening). The supporting cast is uniformly great, from Elle Fanning as the girl next door to Billy Crudup as a lonely tenant/handyman, this one really hit me hard. The late 70s period details, along with the soundtrack, and the sun bleached cinematography recalls the joy of discovering yourself through questionable music, bad decisions and rebellious behaviour. Check it out.

3. A Ghost Story

I doubt any other film this year left quite a long lasting impression as this one did. I couldn’t stop thinking about it afterwards and became rather obsessed with pretty much everything it accomplishes. It’s a fairly straight forward tale of a couple (Casey Affleck and Rooney Mara) whose relationship begins to feel the strain as they quietly realise they might want different things in life. We’re not privy to many more details, positioned as a voyeur which will continue as things unfold but before long, Affleck is killed in a simple car accident outside his home and seemingly rises from death to haunt his old home, dressed entirely in the hospital bed sheet his corpse was covered in. It’s a genius depiction of the traditional ghost - simultaneously off-putting, amusing, whimsical and ridiculous - and it’s also rooted in logic too. As the ghost continues to watch his Mara grieve for him (mesmerisingly encapsulated in an unbroken take of a depressed Mara eating an entire pie that her neighbour brought round), he (and us) slowly begin to notice time... breaking.

The way the passing of time is visualised here is beautifully simple - rather than the long slow fades that normally indicate transitions, here it is as sudden as the ghost turning around to look over his shoulder, through a series of hard cuts or sometimes, no cuts at all. That feeling of time literally slipping away is brutal and the ghost can do nothing but wander about, seemingly helpless to how fast things change. One moment, Mara packs up and leaves, the next a new family of three have apparently been living there for months. Ultimately, the film becomes a meditation on the importance we embue in places, not so much people. The house is the anchor - the core - of what the ghost latches on to and if you’ve ever had the feeling of wondering who lived in your home before you and who will be there after you’ve gone, this film will dig deep into your mind.

I found this to be a brilliantly low-fi way to tell a huge thematic story and the use of music throughout - including one central track in particular - only adds to it. If you can get past the pie-eating without thinking ‘da hell is this’, you’re in for a treat.

2. Dunkirk

I’m almost scared to put this so high. I’ve no doubt in my mind that it’s a five star film and it’s certainly the most visceral, immediate cinema going experience I’ve perhaps ever had (I caught it at the BFI IMAX, opening night, at a late showing and it truly does fill your entire periphery vision) but a part of me wonders if it will hold up on second viewing - i.e. if seeing it anywhere other than the IMAX will diminish it. Well, I’m sure it won’t be the same but I’m also convinced it won’t matter either because this is clockwork precision film making of the highest order; an exercise in narrative structure as well as simply being the most accurate representation of the event in question as there possibly could be.

Some people have complained that this film does a disservice to its characters but I disagree. The power of this story is that it’s the tale of the everyman - how all of these people, no matter the extent of their involvement or the merits of their bravery, became heroes. I don’t need to see the ‘movie’ version of this - where characters chat about their backstories or show photos of loved ones or do every other cliche around. I KNOW all that is going on within the frame but I don’t need to see it. What we’re seeing is the immediacy of these events, which heightens the terror and the hopelessness felt by everyone on that beach or in those boats or in those planes. The land/sea/sky split is impeccably done and the devotion to practical battle scenes is stunning. The aerial dogfights - in full IMAX - practically made me feel like I was strapped to a wing. But even looking past the spectacle, the performances DO bring out the heart of the characters we’re presented with. From Cillian Murphy’s PTSD riddled soldier to the steely determination of Mark Rylance to the rather genius casting of Harry Styles - the exact kind of kid who would have been swept up in this war - everyone is all in and they all blew me away. Especially Tom Hardy, in perhaps his most restricted role yet (it’s like Bane meets Locke), who garners the biggest cheers.

And Hans Zimmer’s epic score can make me sweat just thinking about it. A perfect compliment to the tightening framework and increasing stakes of the action.

1. La La Land

Where do I even begin with this? Full spoilers ahead, I couldn’t help myself.

Clearly, this isn’t a film for everyone. And I get that. Some people think it’s fine but kinda hate musicals. Others get frustrated with the character’s choices. Others would have preferred it to actually remain a musical throughout. I understand all of these criticisms but for me, it does perfectly what it sets out to do. 

First of all, I personally love the musical numbers - from the jaw dropping opening of Another Day of Sun to the kinetic, glamourous rush of Someone in the Crowd to the heartfelt yearning of City of Stars. I think they’re great tunes, wonderfully performed and exceptionally shot. I think of the long one-shot takes of the first, the swimming pool splashdown of the second and the little smack on the shoulder of the third. They’re rooted in feeling, in character and in the tradition of Hollywood. They wear their influences on their sleeve but never feel like a parody. And to me, the sudden shift away from being a flat out musical at the end of the first act is not a misstep but entirely organic - this is the rare love story that has its head in the clouds (romantic dating montages, dreamlike dancing through the stars) as well as being brutally honest about what we want, how we get them and the sacrifices these things cost. 

The movie starts out as this fantastical anti-meet-cute before morphing into a romantic fable full of wonderment but the moment the characters get together, it switches gears and becomes more grounded in reality. The music largely stops and the real world catches up. Arguments are had, compromises are made, promises are broken. This is the harsh truth of getting what you want at the cost of losing what you’ve perhaps always wanted. The tension between Sebastian (Ryan Gosling) and Mia (Emma Stone) becomes uncomfortable - he’s lying to himself about doing what he must to achieve his real dream, even despite Mia’s support and she is battling her own demons in chasing hers. It’s only when the film brings them to their lowest points does it slowly turn back into being something more magical. Sebastian returns to Mia with the news of a new audition, which results in the most raw song/anecdote of the film ‘Audition (The Fools Who Dream), and just as we’re swept into the happy ending we were promised from decades of these movies, the pair realise they have to do their own thing. “We’ll just have to wait and see”...

The film’s extended epilogue is where it really doubles down on this idea. As we’re treated to a return of the ‘full blown musical’, we see the true Hollywood version of this entire story, played out in dreamlike fast forward. Sebastian leaping off his piano to kiss Mia the second he meets her, the villainous J.K. Simmons snapping his fingers and stepping aside, Sebastian giving a standing ovation at Mia’s one woman show that he missed entirely before, the two of them travelling to Paris and crafting a life together that Mia actually did alone. On the surface, it’s a joyous, colourful, happy finale but the final curtain reminds you that it’s all been... a daydream. The road not travelled. So while the film ends with them both achieving their own desires, they’ve lost one another. This is the all-too-often-true cost of creative pursuit and fulfilment and it’s so rare to see it held aloft in the final reel of an Oscar winning movie that appears to be the exact opposite on the surface. 

It’s daring, brave and imaginative and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Maybe I’m too soppy and maybe I’ve just ruined the entire plot for you (I definitely have) but I just couldn’t see anything topping this the moment I saw it. And I guess I was right. Damien Chazelle is a wizard and I can’t wait to see what comes next.