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quicksilversquared · 4 years ago

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Superhero Salary

It all started with a joke. It ended with Ladybug and Chat Noir finally getting some of the compensation that they deserved.

After all, fame isn't going to pay the bills.

links in the reblog

It all started with a (mostly) joking comment from Chat Noir, blurted out in a moment of frustration.

"I hate it when that happens," he had grumbled after Ladybug knocked him free from the akuma's control. "Stupid, stupid mind-control akumas. Tell Hawkmoth that if he's going to insist on akumas like that, he's gonna have to pay for my therapy after this is all over!" he hollered after the akuma, who was clearly hopping mad about no longer having a superhero under his control. "A superhero salary doesn't exactly pay enough for it!"

He had been kidding, at least mostly. Kidding or not, though, the complaint was out there.

The moment had been picked up by the Ladyblog, of course, just as part of the bigger fight. But it wasn't long before it absolutely exploded over the internet.

Sure, maybe in comic books it was implied that superheroes always worked for free. But was that really fair? After all, Ladybug and Chat Noir were providing a service to the city. They were taking the time out of their normal lives to save Paris and put things back to rights, and they were doing it often. They had to come out whenever Hawkmoth sent out an akuma, not just when they had a spare bit of time that they could use to fight crime. Just like policemen and firefighters, they were putting themselves in danger by fighting on the front line. And if they were in jobs, or were in school- well, having to duck out regularly had to be affecting them, and not in a positive way.

If they had jobs, they could very well be on the edge of losing them because of all of the times they went missing. Even if they were self-employed- well, then they would still be losing out on some serious work time and having to work late into the night instead. And if they were in school...

Then they would be in danger of falling behind and need help to keep on top of their schoolwork. Tutors and online courses both cost money.

And on top of all of that, there was superhero merchandise being made using their colors and images, clothes and dolls and souvenirs and toys. Surely they should be getting a cut of the profit from that.

With only a few exceptions, Paris was soon in agreement: their superheroes needed to be earning a salary.

Marinette wasn't quite certain what to think of it all.

"Tikki, what do I say if the mayor decides to give us a salary?" she implored, slumping back in her chair. "I mean, even if it would be possible to safely get the money, I just don't know."

Part of her wanted to do the noble thing and say no to a salary. After all, she was Ladybug because she wanted to help! Plus, would public perception of them change if they were technically city employees? The mayor might think that he had the power to call them up on command, which would really stink.

But- well, Marinette was a teenager, and no sane teenager would turn down money, particularly when it was money for work that she had done. Even though she wasn't exactly struggling- she got an allowance, plus money from babysitting Manon and of course commission money, and besides she was a teenager and not an adult with a million living expenses- having more money in her account for fabric or design classes or her future career wasn't a bad thing.

"Well, Plagg and I could certainly set things up so that all of the money you get would be funneled through us and our magic," Tikki told her. "And we would be careful about not matching up the amounts or making them regular! There's ways that we can do it without attracting attention."

Marinette nodded. That was one question answered, but the other?

"As for if you should take the money..." Tikki considered that. "I mean, there's a lot to consider. But I'd like to point out that you don't know how long you'll be fighting Hawkmoth, or if there'll be any other threats after he's gone to deal with. That could interfere with you having a regular job. And if the akuma attacks keep disrupting your school day and you need to hire a tutor to help you keep up but you don't want your parents knowing, having the extra money could help. Or if you decide to sign up for an online school so that you can look up lessons that you missed in class, you could pay for that! But people might have strong opinions about superheroes taking money, too."

"That's a lot of positives and only one negative," Marinette pointed out. "I mean, it could be annoying to listen to people judging, but unless they're in the majority..."

Either way, it was going to be disheartening to hear people judging her for taking the money. But as long as they weren't in her face or spreading lies about her and Chat Noir now not being motivated to take down Hawkmoth because that would mean an end to the money or something ridiculous like that, she could probably ignore it. Maybe she could make some donations with the money she was getting to dispel those rumors.

Honestly, she'd probably do that anyway. There were so many organizations and people in need in Paris, and if Marinette was earning money then of course she would want to support them.

Of course, that all depended on if the officials even offered the salary in the first place, which was honestly looking really likely. It looked like public opinion was strongly in their favor, and the mayor was seriously easily waived by public opinion most of the time. And anything to do with the superheroes- well, it was publicity gold.

And in the end, it only took a week of deliberations- entirely about how much Ladybug and Chat Noir should be making, and puzzling out how much of the profit from sales of their merchandise they should be getting on top of their salary- before the announcement went out that the superheroes would be offered payment. A day after that, Ladybug and Chat Noir accepted their salary and gave the city's head payroll officer the information their kwamis had given them for the kwami bank accounts, so that they could get their paychecks without risking their secret identities.

"I didn't expect things to blow up like this when I said that, about not earning enough for therapy," Chat Noir admitted after they had left. He had seemed put-together and confident when they were in the office- which Ladybug had appreciated, because the sums that were being discussed were absolutely intimidating and having Chat Noir being so confident next to her helped her not get flustered. "I mean, yeah, down the road, I wouldn't be surprised if I get nightmares about fighting all the time and need to get help with that, but- well, I don't think I'd be able to, not unless I sign up as Chat Noir instead of my civilian self. And I don't know if I would necessarily want to do that, in case too much civilian stuff comes out."

Ladybug winced. Yeah, that was a real concern. And- well, she didn't ever admit it to anyone other than Tikki, but she sometimes had nightmares about the fights, too. And Chat Noir was right- a therapist could probably help.

But the identity concerns...

It was more than likely that some personal information would come out if they were talking to any sort of therapist, and that was dangerous. Maybe the chance of their therapists stumbling on their identities was low, but she still couldn't risk it.

Maybe they could go out of Paris to find someone, using the Horse to jump. Then their therapist would be even less likely to make the connection between Ladybug and Marinette, and with the distance from Paris, having the superheroes in their office might be less exciting than it would be for someone who saw the superheroes on a daily basis. But even that wouldn't really be a possibility until Hawkmoth was gone, when they actually got some semblance of free time back.

"I can't deny that the money could be helpful, though," Chat Noir added after a moment. "I mean, depending on how long the conflict drags on, or if we need anything that Tikki and Plagg can't provide to help us, or- well, when I get old enough to move out of my father's place, I want to. There's way too many people who think that they can just barge into my room without warning and poke around, and- well, it's not safe."

Ladybug glanced over at her partner again. He looked like he was her age- in fact, they had shared enough information inadvertently that she was positive that they were probably a year apart at most- which meant that he was facing years of people disregarding his privacy and potentially discovering his secret. "That's ages away, though."

"I know. I can't do much about it right now, though, besides just paying attention to where I'm detransforming." Chat Noir sighed. "I guess the money can't really help with that, not right now."

"Yeah. And that's not great." Ladybug tapped a rhythm against her leg, trying to come up with a solution and finding none. She just didn't have enough information about the situation to find places where they could do something. "I mean, the most I can come up with is a camera that you could connect to and move around to see if anyone is in there before going back in. And you could see if anyone is coming around and poking around that you don't know about. But- well, the problem is that cameras can be hard to hide, and if your father finds out and decides to review footage..."

"It could backfire on me, really fast." Chat Noir glanced around, then back at her. "Yeah, I know. I guess- well, for now, I won't change anything. Maybe something will come up in the future."

"Yeah, I'm not going to be changing much either, I think. But it's nice to have that money there in case I need it." It made her feel a little weird, honestly- after over a year of volunteer superheroing, accepting money for that was just strange- but maybe eventually, it would sink in that she was doing a job and deserved pay for it.

Chat Noir nodded. "Just in case. And, well- if we don't use it, it'll be a good start for my retirement account!"

Ladybug laughed at that, the awkwardness and concerns that she had had earlier flying away in an instant. "Teenagers with retirement accounts. Who would have thought?"

"Well, you can never be too prepared, right?"

Ladybug giggled again, imaging the looks on her parents' places if she sat down for dinner and started asking questions about retirement accounts and for their advice in setting one up. Maybe it wouldn't be completely out of left field- after all, unlike most of her classmates, Marinette did earn money with commissions, and enough that she would not be spending it all- but it was also a strange thing for a teenager to ask about.

Well. At least it wasn't a bad problem to have.

A week later, Ladybug and Chat Noir officially received their first paychecks, with back payments pending. And by that time, the two of them had figured out where those payments were going.

Most of the money, of course, would be held in the kwami bank accounts until it could be trickled into their civilian bank accounts. How much, exactly, could be deposited without being noticed was still being decided- Ladybug could definitely get away with more than Chat Noir, though she figured that varying amounts and not at regular intervals would stick out less than regular payments. They were still trying to figure out how they might get retirement accounts going- even as much as they joked, it wasn't exactly a bad idea.

And then part of the money would go to charity. It was just a nice thing to do, after all, and since they had spare money- well, it would just be a good idea to help out a little bit more. They didn't want to make too big of a deal out of their donations, since it was very possible that people would judge where they were donating, how much they were donating, how often they were making their donations, and how their donations did or didn't change over time. There would no doubt be people petitioning the superheroes to support their favorite charities, which- well, maybe it would be a good way to learn about new causes, but it sounded like more stress than it would be worth. Besides, Ladybug and Chat Noir were private citizens behind the mask, and they deserved to have some privacy about their finances.

All they needed to tell the public was that they were donating anonymously and wouldn't be disclosing the places or amounts for those reasons. It was a simple answer, and should satisfy most of the population. There would no doubt be a few naysayers- there almost always were a few people who just had to be difficult- but it was a reasonable answer.

Thankfully, the person who had interviewed Ladybug and Chat Noir about what they were going to do with their first paychecks- a kind man from a mid-sized newspaper, who had earned the spot of first interview entirely because he hadn't been pushy about asking- had thought that their reasoning was plenty sound. They were hardly going to be millionaires, and so expecting them to donate large amounts on a regular (and frequent) basis was completely ridiculous. Keeping things private- well, that meant that people who were out of touch wouldn't be moaning about donations that they were perceiving as too small.

Just because Ladybug and Chat Noir were famous didn't mean that they were rich.

Marinette hummed quietly to herself as she skimmed the article that the reporter they had talked to had written. While the interview itself had taken place several days prior, the article had just been released that morning to coincide with both their first payment and the start of the month. It was very nicely written, and framed their reasoning in an even more clear and articulate light than they had managed themselves. She didn't doubt that it would get noticed soon, and then the speculation about whether or not Ladybug and Chat Noir would donate some of their earnings would be put to rest for once and for all-

"Wait, Ladybug and Chat Noir aren't donating any of their salary? That's so unlike them!"

-or maybe not.

"I was surprised too, they just completely brushed me off when I suggested that they donate part of their salaries," Lila told her audience as they swept into the room as a- well, as a flock, really, that was the only way to describe it. "It's what I would do if I was a superhero, of course, so I thought that they would feel the same! It's such a let-down, I really thought that they were better than that..."

"I would say that maybe it's because they've donated so much of their time to the city already, but I know I heard something at some point about backpayments to cover their time from the start," Alya commented, her eyebrows furrowed. "So that's not really donated time anymore, is it?"

"Maybe they have bills to pay," Rose piped up, clearly ever-hopeful. "And they need to get caught up with that first, of course. That would make sense!"

Of course, Lila was shaking her head as she headed up to her seat, with the rest of the group following not far behind to keep listening. "They're too young for bills. I met up with them again this morning and was trying to talk some sense into them because really, they could just do small donations, even a little bit helps- I would know, I've seen how far money can stretch and help in a charity! But even now that they have the money in their hands, they just want to keep it."

There were murmurs of disappointment all around the group gathered around Lila at that. Even though donations clearly weren't mandatory- well, they thought that the superheroes should be better role models than that! If they didn't have bills to pay, surely...

"And it's not like they're not getting enough to have both spending money and do a little charity," Lila said, shaking her head sadly. "Plenty of spending money, even! And I pointed that out, but they got really upset with me. I'd hate for our friendship to be destroyed over this really, but it's just- I feel like I don't know them at all now!"

Frankly, Marinette had heard enough. She wasn't going to let her reputation as Ladybug- or Chat Noir's reputation- get slandered by Lila's nonsense.

"Funny thing," Marinette commented in the most deadpan, disinterested voice that she could muster, not even taking her eyes off of her tablet as she talked. "You say that you met up with the superheroes this morning and they weren't interested in doing donations, and yet there's an article in La Trib this morning about an interview they did with the superheroes days ago that say otherwise. It says that donating was in their plan from the start."

The group in the back of the room went quiet.

"Marinette is correct," Markov commented after a moment, breaking the silence. "The article was posted one hour ago, though the paper copy presumably went out earlier. The superheroes stated that they have been looking at charities since they first heard that they might be getting money for their superhero work, as they wish to continue to help Paris. Their donations will be anonymous and private to protect their privacy and to prevent unwanted commentary on their choices."

Marinette glanced back. All eyes were slowly turning from Markov to Lila.

"There is also a video of the interview linked on the online version of the article," Markov added. "And the metadata confirms that it was filmed several days ago."

Several of the eyes pointed towards Lila were getting narrowed and suspicious.

"Oh, that- that's lovely!" Lila exclaimed, somewhat belatedly pressing her hand over her heart. "Maybe they were just trying to wind me up to tease me, then! And I misread the situation and took them seriously. Or they were trying to give me a pleasant surprise! It happens, sometimes- I'm not always great at catching sarcasm-"

This time, not everyone looked entirely convinced.

Smiling to herself, Marinette looked back at her tablet, closing out of the article and opening up their reading for Literature so that she could review it- or, well, finish reading it, because an akuma had interrupted her the previous night and it had been too late to pick it up again once the fight was over. If she hurried, she might be able to finish it before Ms. Bustier called for a start to class, and then she wouldn't get in trouble again for not doing her homework.

Honestly, if Lila's track record was anything to go by, she would probably wriggle her way out of the lie by the afternoon and the whole incident would be forgotten. But maybe this time would end up different- after all, Marinette had never seen that doubt before- and Lila's tower of lies would finally come toppling down. It was long overdue, really, but Marinette wasn't going to hold her breath.

If it happened...well, if their superhero salary was like a surprise cake, then a Lila downfall would be the cherry on top.

#Miraculous Ladybug #my writing #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #superhero retirement fund

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anxietycalling · 5 years ago

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... is this thing on?

HA. After like two months of trying to break into my own goddamn tumblr account, I finally figured out what password I used. So hi. Hello. Welcome back to the internet, self.

I mostly wanted to log in to give some updates about my life and start, you know, documenting it as there is some monumental stuff in the works for me this year. I’ll put the rest of it under a cut because I’m not a barbarian.

So one of the biggest changes for me since the last time I blogged reliably is that I got diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. That was, uh, two years ago? Somewhere in that general timeframe. It’s not really that surprising, given my mother’s extreme fastidiousness that she later admitted to me is untreated OCD. I’m the only person I know who can walk soundlessly in pitch dark and make entire meals without touching food with my hands because of that. But anyways, I guess the reason it didn’t get diagnosed sooner is because, as my wonderful psychologist puts it, “You’re too smart to fall for obvious compulsions because you’re aware of how they affect your public perception, so you get trapped in the ones that are more realistic.” In other words, I intellectualize my OCD too much. That’s not to say it doesn’t affect my life though! For... probably about a year, maybe more, I had a crippling fear of handling or preparing food for others because I had a persistent obsession that I would accidentally poison someone. At its worst it got so bad that I couldn’t touch plastic wrap or open packaging, either. Through cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and exposure response prevention (ERP), my symptoms have decreased to the point where I’m able to cook for myself and others again. I still seek reassurance more than I should - which is another symptom of OCD - but I’m working on it. Baby steps! Most of my symptoms are manageable now, but I do still get ‘stuck’ sometimes. Like I said, I have a wonderful psychologist. She makes me do things I don’t want to do. She’s nice about it, but she’s a bit of a stickler for progress. Which is good! She’s very practical in a way that previous therapists of mine haven’t been. I don’t like the ooey-gooey “How does that make you feeeeeel? How does it relate to your tortured chiiiiildhood?” nonsense, so I’m glad we can skip that. For years I thought I was just bad at therapy, so I didn’t pursue it. Turns out that the right person with the right counselling philosophy can be a great asset in managing mental illness. Which leads me to the reason I sought out a therapist to begin with...

When I moved to Ottawa, I got a regular endocrinologist for the first time in my life. She’s wonderful and willing to work with her patients at their own level. My husband goes to the same endo (but more on him in a second...) and seeing the differences in the way she interacts with each of us is awesome. She takes time to answer my many questions and often has great practical advice about managing hormone replacement therapy. My testosterone levels have been stable for... three years now? Maybe a little more? Aside from one set of bloodwork where my hemoglobin was high, there haven’t been any major hiccups. And my endo said that it wasn’t necessarily concerning, just a precaution because we don’t know what the effects of heightened hemoglobin levels in transgender men are yet. Another thing my endocrinologist does is refer her patients to other relevant services. After my second or third appointment with her, she wrote my letter of recommendation to the government so I could change my gender designation on my birth certificate. She also did the paperwork for OHIP to cover my top surgery. I got the letter from the Ministry of Health a couple of weeks later, and started down the path to actually, you know, getting surgery. It’s more complicated than you think! She recommended me to the Montreal GRS clinic (Drs. Brassard, Belanger and Bensimon). There is a fair amount of paperwork that they request before your file even gets passed to the surgery team. One of those things was a letter of recommendation from a health professional that meets the WPATH standards of care. That’s when my endo recommended my therapist to me. The WPATH standards of care require at least 6 months of follow-up from the practitioner, so I sat down in that office once a month until I got my dang letter. And what a letter it was! Cori, my therapist, basically wrote a strongly worded letter that implies her disapproval over needing a letter at all. Why, you may ask? Because I already had years of documentation detailing my gender dysphoria and persistent desire for surgery. Literal years of it, dating back to... 2007 or so. But she wrote the letter, we continued on, and my brain is much healthier than it’s been for years.

Getting my IDs changed was a lot more work than I expected. Like, I knew that it would take a fair amount of paperwork, and I was prepared for that. I did my gender marker change first, which involved first getting the letter of recommendation notarized and sending it off to the government to get a shiny new birth certificate with an ‘M’ on it. It took about 4 months to get my first birth certificate. After that, back to city hall I went to change the gender on my driver’s license and health card. Getting the gender marker changed was inexpensive - I paid $35 for the new birth certificate plus postage. Ottawa city hall has services that will commission (notarize) your documents for free, so I didn’t pay for that, but normally in our city it costs between $15-20. Next I did my name change. The form itself is about 30 pages or so, and most of it is just checking boxes like “Hey, I’m not a criminal, I’m not hiding from any debts,” and then getting it notarized and mailing it off. The name change took the longest - I waited about 6 months for my new birth certificate. Changing the name on my IDs was easy. All I had to do was go back to city hall (again) and wait in line (again) and update my drivers’ license, health card and social insurance file. For about the first month after my name change, I had a folder I carried everywhere with me. You never really realize how many places you give your name to until you have to change it. The gym, doctor’s offices - despite having socialized healthcare and a (mostly) computerized system, you have to remember to change your name at every doctor’s office you visit separately. Now I have my updated IDs, so I can just show my driver’s license.

Now I’m going to talk about the path to getting a surgery date at GRS Montreal. Yes, I got the letter for my OHIP funding relatively quickly, but actually getting my file to the surgical team was a logistical disaster. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, by the way - I’m glad that they’re doing their due diligence and making sure everything is well documented. It’s just kind of hard when you’ve already waited for so long to stay patient. So, yes, I got my letter from Cori after 6 months. The reason I’m so irritated about it to this day is that a couple of months after they insisted they needed this letter, I got another email from the clinic saying they didn’t need it. And then they went back and forth on it another couple of times, so Cori and I just said fuck it and did it anyways, because I do not have the patience for that kind of back-and-forth. During the interim while I was getting regularly therapized, I also did all of the medical components they required. It was basically just a visit with my family doctor so he could sign a form and say “Hey, this guy is healthy enough for surgery and I am competent to handle any complications.” I know that doesn’t sound like a lot, but having to fill out a million checkboxes and saying ‘No’ to a million health conditions I don’t have, multiple times, gets a bit tedious after a while. So I did all of that, and then I sat on my hands and waited. And waited. And waited some more. I prodded them occasionally via email, because I’m impatient at the best of times and am often bossy and direct with health professionals. Finally, after another 6 months, they passed my file on to the surgical team, who actually called me on the phone promptly to tell me the next steps. The surgical nurse literally emailed me an info packet on Jackson-Pratt drains while on the phone with me. They gave me my surgery date in September. And now we wait again. I’m leaving for Montreal on February 25th. At this point I’m just impatient and trying to keep busy. 51 more days. The closer it gets, the more time stands still.

My bio-dad died in... 2017? Something like that. I know, it sounds awful that I don’t remember when he died but also, he was just a shit person. He abused me, he let his girlfriend abuse me, and he continued being a terrible person even in death. There was money for me in some account he had (and had forgotten), apparently, and I spent almost a year trying to figure out how to get it with no luck. Seriously. Even my mom, who had long since divorced my bio-dad and remarried, tried - because the account manager said she had to be the one that accessed the account, even though it was in my name and I’m an adult... and my mother’s lawyer looked at the whole thing, figured out that it was super illegal, and the investment firm stopped returning my calls. What a fucking scam. And yes, I could pursue it legally if I wanted to, but I really don’t want to. I don’t have the patience or the money for lawyers. Everyone in my family is unequivocally mad at me for not going to the funeral. I mean, why would I? Why would I go to the funeral of a man who sexually abused me and chose alcohol over both of his kids? But my family tends to be very “But faaaaaaamily!”, therefore, most of them have stopped speaking to me. I’m not really upset by his dying, by the way. I kind of made peace with it in like 2013 or so the first time my mother called me sobbing to tell me he was on his deathbed. I wasn’t surprised then, either, that he had congestive heart failure due to alcoholism. He was so jaundiced the last time I saw him in person that he looked like a Simpsons character. He didn’t recognize me, either. My brother had to tell him that I was his own child. So that pretty much killed any kind of forgiveness I could have had for the man. To his credit, he maybe kind-of tried. If trying is calling me, on purpose, on my birthday every year to tell me what a woman I am and am becoming. Ugh. Gross. Grossgrossgross. Also, and this is a big Also, I could not have stomached that funeral when everyone was acting like his death was so Tragic and Could Not Have Been Foreseen. Like! I remember from childhood that that man could put away a 24-pack of beer in a day. One of my fondest childhood memories of him - if you can call them that - is bottle return day, where we would wait for my mom to leave for work and then sneak his empties out of the house to return for the deposit, which he would then use to buy more beer and buy KFC for lunch. And this is a secret that we kept from my mother for, like, years. I don’t think she really ever knew the extent of his drinking. Or mine, when I was still drinking. I wasn’t ever really bothered by his death. I had a breakdown about it, sure, but it was more about the finality of his having died without standing up for myself or demanding an explanation/apology for his behavior towards us, or for raping my brother’s girlfriend, or... anything.

I had a job with great pay, and I fucking quit it. No, seriously. I was making $18 an hour and I walked away from it because it was driving me to a nervous breakdown. I wasn’t sleeping, I was barely eating, and I couldn’t have a day off without obsessively thinking about work. I got promoted way too quickly and sort of lied-to way too often about how things would change, they never did, and finally in October I couldn’t handle it anymore. I saw Cori and she basically told me that I needed to quit or she’d make me. And I still feel kind of bad about that, because Ash and I fought about that for months beforehand. Literal months. It’s the only thing we’ve ever fought about. But I sat in that office in tears about the thought of ever going back to McDonald’s, and it was the right choice. The first month was really hard. Not financially - I had decent enough savings to float us for a couple months. But emotionally, I was devastated. I’ve always kind of vacillated my self-worth between pushing myself way too hard to try and force everyone to like me and crumbling under the pressure from that and turning inwards. I had no idea what to do with myself. I was sleeping at weird hours or not sleeping at all. The cats were glad I was home, and so was Ash, but I felt really sick not doing anything - or at least as much. Even with school, I felt kind of aimless. Online classes don’t really demand specific time frames. Yeah, there are due dates, but aside from that you’re really on your own. Now I’m glad that I quit when I did. From what my friends who still work there tell me, things have only gone downhill. It’s not surprising. They take anyone who’s halfway competent and seduce them with promises they have no intention of keeping to accept promotions and then never follow through. They push people way too hard and they’re not growing and changing with the economy and the demographic of people they’re able to hire for minimum wage. Like, I’m sorry, but once I’ve recovered from surgery there are way better jobs I can get that will keep my brain way healthier.

The husband. Well, to-be. We’re going to do it on paper at Halloween. Nothing flashy, just going to city hall and signing some papers and then it’s done. I’m not sure exactly where to start on this one because most of it happened so fast. I kind of dicked around with online dating for a bit and nothing really came of it; I had lost expectations around the time he messaged me. There was nothing that immediately said “Hey, you’re going to fall in love with this person!” but I took the leap anyways. I was having a hard time coming to terms with being gay and trans, so a low-stakes thing with less expectation seemed nice to me. ... And then we talked, and we both fell hard. I moved to Ottawa 2 months later, after a fairly tumultuous time going back and forth on the train pretty much every 4 or 5 days. I spent most of my money on traveling those months. It was extremely worth it. I knew I was in it for the long-haul when he called me while I was on the train home one day. I’d just left, much against my better judgment, and he had a doctor’s appointment that I’d wanted to go to. Ash is not great at asserting himself with doctors. Like I said, I’m bossy and controlling, so this one would’ve been good for me to be at. He called me basically in tears. Something was weird with his bloodwork, and not only could he not start testosterone as originally planned, but his doctors thought he had leukemia. In typical me fashion, I basically got home, worked a day or two and immediately turned around and came back. There were tests. There was bloodwork. Much of it is a blur, but the thrilling conclusion is that doctors often don’t know how to interpret Ash’s blood results because he doesn’t have a spleen, so his blood is shaped wrong. No cancer! Just weird blood and a crappy immune system. But that crystallized it for me. We moved into a friend’s place for a couple of months, and then, when we could, moved into our current apartment. And for a couple of months it was nice! Great, even! But our roommate’s girlfriend, who also lived with us, had a poorly managed personality disorder and was emotionally and sexually abusive to our wonderful roommate. It took months, but eventually we evicted her after having secret meetings away from the house to come up with a battle plan. In the end, she had to be removed by police and her parents had to come get her things. It’s something I hope I never have to do again, because it felt awful and the girl’s poor parents were clearly devastated. We parted ways with the roommate in June. Amicably, but a bit sad. Part of it was that we had outgrown having roommates, and part of it is that our roommate, while a wonderful person, has a serious hoarding disorder related to anxiety that clashed awfully with my OCD symptoms. They’re in a house with some wonderful people now, so hopefully it’s better with people who are able to be supportive in a more helpful way. All of this to say that I have a wonderful husband, who I love very much.

Which brings me to my next point. Jeez, this is turning into a novel. I’m so sorry. But anyways, I started university in September! It’s been tough what with the work stuff, but I’m doing pretty well. I’m majoring in psychology and desperately white-knuckling my way through introductory biology so I can take cognitive neuropsychology classes next year. Eventually I’d like to become a clinician, but I’m pretty sure I need to go to graduate school for that. I’m taking less classes than I’d like because of surgery, but I’m going to take summer classes to make up for it.

Also because Ash had to have emergency surgery before Christmas! We’d known something was wrong with his elbow for a while - it was an injury that he’d had since before we met. But over the course of 3 years, an injured elbow turned to a lump, and that lump lead to a loss of mobility. His family doctor didn’t seem overly concerned about it, and didn’t run the proper tests until this year. Thanks to a concerned sports medicine doctor who was way out of his depth, more tests were run. There’s nothing quite like the concerned, hushed tone of a doctor to strike fear into one’s heart. The diagnostic imaging showed a tumor had grown in Ash’s elbow. I named him Leopold. A non-cancerous, aggressive giant cell tumor. In his elbow. Literally eating away at the bone. Likely had been for a while. They called us on a Wednesday. Ash went to meet the surgeon on Thursday. The hospital called the same day to book him for surgery. Monday he went to meet with the anaesthesiologist. Tuesday we went to the hospital and they removed Leopold. And let me tell you, it was an absolute shit show. First of all, they expect a man who’s still drugged up from the anaesthesia to be able to decide if he can go home that night or not. They wouldn’t even let him call me before making him decide. Listen, this man is not great at taking decisive action in the best of circumstances sometimes. I actually ended up going home to feed the cats and going back before anyone even told me whether he was coming home or not! Then the post-operative nurses didn’t give clear directions on the aftercare, so I ended up calling the hospital multiple days in a row to figure out what was going on. They didn’t even tell me what type of stitches he had. I think the worst part was that the doctors didn’t actually check with us what kind of painkillers would be most appropriate. They just sent us home with a list, half of which wasn’t covered by insurance, and we had to white-knuckle it the first night with basically good intentions and fancy Tylenol before we could borrow the money for the rest of his painkillers the next morning. I honestly wasn’t sure we would survive that first night. Because the damage to the elbow was so severe, they put a nerve block into the arm that slowly started wearing off through the night. I never want to see anyone in that much pain. It was the kind of pain where you’re not even human anymore; you’re reduced down to an animal who’s scared and in pain, and all you want is for it to stop. I know it was necessary, what they did, to preserve motor function in the arm, but fuck, it was awful. I’m doing a bad job of explaining the technical side of this. It was an elbow resection with tumor removal and a bone graft. The bone graft actually might be the worst part. Because the tumor ate so much of the bone, we had to do the surgery pretty much immediately because any kind of impact could have shattered Ash’s remaining bone permanently. And they had to be so, so careful during the procedure because the tumor was resting on a nerve. To the surgeons’ credit, they did not sever the nerve. It’s less irritated now, and the arm actually looks quite good, but I wish they’d given us more information ahead of time. I was woefully unprepared for how much work I would be doing. You never realize how much work your hands do until they’re taken away from you. Also, something else people never talk about with surgery is how much painkillers mess with your mood. Opioids are by nature depressants, but all the textbooks downplay exactly how severe the mood symptoms can be. Of course being bedridden plays into it as well, but painkillers severely inhibit cognitive function. That first week or so was awful. There were so many goddamn medications and most of them were useless. We were like robots, with the fucking medication dispensing. I had alarms set every 4 hours so the pain couldn’t come back. We tried. We tried so fucking hard, only to get to the follow-up appointment and have a very nice medical student give us the good stuff: Tylenol # 3 and morphine. Did I mention she was a very nice med student?

So yes, that’s basically the state of my life at the moment. I haven’t really written anything since I left California, but I’m going to try this year to actually finish something. I’m going to post regularly, both because I kind of missed this place and because it’s nice to see concrete progress. Also, when I was looking for pictures of surgery results there wasn’t a lot to be found, so I’m trying to save someone else the same trouble.

Anyone who actually read to the end of this, you’re great and I’m very sorry I basically wrote a novel about my life. I know my descriptions are lacking in some places, so feel free to... ask follow-up questions, I guess? I dunno. It’s nice to be back.

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fesahaawit · 7 years ago

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Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments

Well, my friends, I can hardly believe we are days into the new year—and 2017 is behind us. Part of me wanted to let the date change without putting much energy into reminiscing and thinking about all that the year held for me. But I think that’s simply a combination of knowing it will always be the year I remember losing the girls + feeling excited for a fresh start. I can’t predict what 2018 will hold, of course, and I don’t like to put pressure on new calendar years and new beginnings. In saying that, I can’t deny that I’m ready to leave my sadness behind in 2017, and continue to move forward in general. Because even with all the sadness, I do feel as though I made some big steps forward last year—particularly when it came to my mental health.

It’s been interesting to look back at my first post from 2017 when I announced I was going to complete a year of slow living experiments. People still ask why I decided to start those experiments, and the only answer I can come up with is because I felt as though I genuinely needed to. My anxiety was at about a low-to-medium level, compared to what it would later climb to in March and April. But it was high enough then that I knew I couldn’t handle all the other messaging that filled my feeds before that new year had even begun. You know, the ones about how to be bigger (or skinnier), better, faster, stronger and richer. I couldn’t stand to read those messages, because I had enough to be anxious about. So, I decided to opt out of it all and simply slow down, instead.

I didn’t have a plan, before I got started. Instead, I had a general list of the areas in my life that I might consider slowing down and being more intentional about. Before the beginning of each new month, I checked in with myself + the list and considered which area of my life needed the most attention. And then I wrote out a list of intentions—not hard goals I had to stick to, but intentions for things I wanted in my life—and got started.

Things didn’t always go as planned. As an example, my plan was to complete 12 slow living experiments—one every month—but life (and anxiety and grief) took me down a couple unexpected paths, so I decided to opt out yet again. And that felt better. Since I had created this whole experiment for myself, I was allowed to change the rules, or simply opt out. So, that’s exactly what I did for the month of June after the girls died, and again in September when I decided my only intention was to spend 30 minutes outside each day. That’s what I could handle, so that’s what I did. As a result, I (mostly) completed 10 slow living experiments in 2017—and I would like to share some reflections on them all, in the event that it might help you plan for something similar.

Experiment #1: Slow Mornings

wake up naturally

make the bed

eat breakfast

enjoy my coffee

read a book (audiobooks work too)

I always knew I was going to start with the slow morning experiment—I just didn’t know it would end up being one of the most important experiments I would do all year. My list of intentions was simple enough. Each day, I woke up naturally (without an alarm clock), turned on an audiobook, made coffee and breakfast, and just relaxed a little bit before diving into work. It was so simple, but it was also such a treat. January was the month I finished the first draft of The Year of Less and it was a complete blur. I holed myself up in an Airbnb in downtown Squamish and was basically in isolation for five weeks, aside from going snowshoeing with Krystal once and having an old friend from high school over once too (and that wasn’t even until after I submitted the book). All I did was work—and enjoy my slow mornings. I’m happy to say this is something I’ve kept up with ever since, including making my bed every day, which was something I didn’t do often before. It feels good to start each day at a slower pace rather than rush into things, and it feels really good to crawl into a fresh-looking bed every night. Oh, and I read 5 books that month, which prompted a year where I read a lot more. :)

Experiment #2: Slow Money

set new financial goals for 2017

track my spending / make sure it aligns with new goals

change my budgeting strategy

change my investing strategy

analyze / find ways to reduce business expenses

bonus: file my taxes (or at least input all the numbers)

The idea behind the slow money experiment wasn’t so much that I would slow my money down (what does that even mean!?), but that I would do one big check-in with my finances overall. The intention was to simply make sure I was happy with how things were going and shift anything that felt like it needed a change. In February, I crossed most of these things off the list! But, as it often goes, things changed as time went on. For starters, I did NOT run a lean business. In 2016, my business expenses added up to exactly $14,000 and I wanted to attempt to cut that in half. Instead, I ended up spending $17,000 in 2017. This wasn’t a surprise, though. I track my business finances (invoices, payments, expenses, etc.) every month in FreshBooks, so I always know how things are adding up. There are only two financial decisions I regret (costing me about $2,300). Otherwise, it was all intentional (vs. impulsive) and I feel good about my final numbers. I’m just aware now that it will likely be impossible to ever spend less than $14,000 on my business. The one money move I’m extremely happy I made was the decision to start investing regularly. In an attempt to adopt an abundance mindset, I setup a weekly automatic deposit into my Wealthsimple account and have kept that going all year! (Though I did decrease the amount in the summer, when I wasn’t earning much.) Nearly one year later, I’ve learned I won’t run out of money—and that was a lesson I really needed.

Experiment #3: Slow Move

go through all of my belongings again / only pack what I want to keep

sell / donate everything I don’t want to bring with me

make a list of things I think I want to buy (like a standing desk)

settle into my new home, before actually buying anything

reach out and make plans with new friends :)

March was a tough month for me, personally (you might have guessed that if you read this post), but it finished on a high note when I moved to Squamish. At the beginning, I was definitely living small, having no couch or coffee table or desk or basically anything in my living space. But in June, I bought a couch. At the end of the summer, I pieced together a DIY standup desk (for about $450 vs. the $600-$1,200 you’d pay in stores). And I even commissioned my friend Amanda Sandlin to do a custom painting for me. I still don’t have a coffee table, but it’s not a priority right now (saving for my trip to the UK is). It’s taken almost a year but I really do feel at home here—not because of the stuff, but because of the life I’ve built and the friends I’ve made. For the first time in years, I’m not wondering where I can move to next. I just want to be here, and that feels really good.

Experiment #4: Slow Breathing

have slow mornings

do yoga 10x (short practices are fine)

meditate for 7 days in a row

listen to audiobooks/podcasts on this subject

go floating at the end of the month

At the beginning of April, I sat down to write a post about how I was going to do the slow work experiment next, but I couldn’t finish it. It felt impossible to string words into sentences and sentences into paragraphs about things that didn’t actually matter to me then. All I could think about was news I had received on March 28th that shot my anxiety up higher than I knew it could go. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t write or do any kind of work. Some days, the elephant on my chest was so heavy that I couldn’t even breathe. So, I decided to do the slow breathing experiment instead. Only I didn’t end up crossing much off this list. Instead, I published that post then read all the comments that poured in, and took all of your suggestions to heart—particularly the ones that asked if I’d ever considered talking to someone about this stuff. I had thought about it, but I had never taken action on those thoughts. Your comments helped me get the courage to. A few hours later, with the help of my friend Clare, I crafted an email to a therapist. She called me shortly after, and I started seeing her the very next day. I’ve written about this enough times now, I think, but want to make sure I say it again for anyone who is considering doing the same: therapy is the best investment I’ve ever made. It definitely changed—and saved—my life. And I will always be grateful I started it in April, because things got so much tougher in May.

Experiment #5: Slow Technology

do a 30-day social media detox (April 29th – May 28th)

figure out the role I want social media to play in my life

check / reply to email less often (also experiment with not checking on my phone)

figure out the role I want technology to play in my life (phone, computers, TV, etc.)

read from a book every day

With how much anxiety I was experiencing, May was the best month for me to take a step back from social media and attempt the slow technology experiment. And I know I’m not the only one who felt like opting out from it altogether this year. But I decided to log off all social media for a month and think about how I could have a better experience with it when I went back—because I didn’t actually want to quit it altogether, I just didn’t want it to always feel so negative. Like any social media detox, it came with the realization that I was addicted to my phone and I knew I wanted to have a healthier relationship with it too. But I ended up quitting early and going back online after Molly died (May 22nd) so I could share the news and also support my family while they shared it too. I don’t regret that decision. Because of the detox, I have kept Twitter off my phone all year, and even deleted the email app from it (until recently because the book launch has required that I be a little more connected). So, I do feel a lot better about how (much less) I use my phone now. I’m not even that great at replying to text messages anymore! The most important lesson I took away from that experiment was that, when it comes to social media (and technology as a whole), you’re allowed to create your own rules on how to use it. In fact, you should. I am continuing to do this, and made another big decision I’ll share with you later this month.

June – No Experiment

After both dogs died (Lexie on May 31st), I decided not to force myself to do a slow living experiment. Instead, I spent the first week of June in Victoria, then flew to Minneapolis to see friends, and drove all the way back from there with a friend + his dog. It was exactly what I needed.

Experiment #6: Slow Food

eat mostly* home-cooked meals

*eat out max. once/week at restaurants that use locally-sourced ingredients

swap out some ingredients for stuff that can be sourced in Squamish or BC

switch back to a vegetarian diet

eat slowly :)

After dealing with some of my grief, and then coming home from a two-week road trip throughout the US, it was obvious that my next slow living experiment should involve taking care of myself—and I decided to do that through the slow food experiment. Aside from slow mornings, this was the easiest experiment to complete. I loved walking to the farmer’s market every Saturday, buying local produce + eggs, cooking my meals, and only eating out at Fergie’s once a week. It felt really good to be at home, spend time in the kitchen and fuel my body. So, this one was easy. I even had a little fun and shared pictures of my simple kitchen + minimalist pantry. (I will say though that the contents of my pantry has basically quadrupled, as I’ve been cooking and baking more!)

Experiment #7: Slow Consumption!? Sure, let’s go with that. ;)

complete a 30-day shopping ban (August 3rd – September 1st)

do a small declutter/purge + take inventory of some of my stuff

organize my digital life (inbox, blog post drafts folder, files/folders, pictures, etc.)

do some values + goal-setting exercises

get back into alignment with myself :)

The slow food experiment was a huge success, and taking care of myself in one area of my life helped me realize I had to do it in another. See, grief has this way of causing you to shutdown a little. Maybe not completely. But you start to let things go, including some of the control you had. For the first couple of months after losing the girls, I found I was a little more impulsive in most areas of my life—but specifically with my spending. I wasn’t blowing hundreds of dollars or anything. I simply wasn’t being intentional, and that can eventually add up to a lot of wasted money. So, I decided to do a 30-day shopping ban. Not shopping for a month was easy, though I did make two purchases so I could complete projects I had started: some fabric to repair a blanket, and the supplies to finally make a top for my DIY standup desk. But not shopping for anything I didn’t need was easy, and it helped me stop thinking short-term and start dreaming about what I wanted again. The result: I realized I was done with doing small trips, and wanted to finally save and go on a big trip to the UK in 2018! On top of not shopping, I also decluttered my home + my online life, and got to the beginning of September feeling ready for a fresh start.

September – 30 Days in Nature

For this fresh start, I knew the one thing I needed more than anything else was to spend more time outdoors again. I documented this slow living experiment on my Instagram account.

Experiment #8: Slow Work

track how many hours I work every day (and how many per project)

set realistic expectations of what I can get done (with timelines)

explore other creative outlets (this could be fun – stay tuned!)

share how I slowly grew my blog (incl. dollars + blog stats)

share plans for what’s next :)

By October, I finally felt like I had gotten back into alignment with myself. The last piece of the puzzle was to find my focus with work again. Unlike April, when I would have tried to force myself to complete the slow work experiment (and really needed to focus on my mental health instead), I actually felt ready—and excited—to do it in October. And it’s not surprising to me that I got to the end feeling like it was another successful experiment, because that’s often what happens when you listen to your body and intuition, and focus on the thing that needs your attention. Anyway, I tracked my hours, and not only figured out how much I was working but also how long it would realistically take me to get projects done (which helped me make some executive decisions about which projects/ideas to let go of). I also started to dream big again and ask myself what I really wanted. I don’t have all the answers, but I know that 2018 will include more in-person, face-to-face time with this community, rather than just hanging out online. I also know I’m going to let go of one social media platform (you might notice I removed it from the top nav bar on the website), and spend more time on the one I enjoy the most. These two things feel really good to me. While my business is going to look different, in terms of how I make my money, all the decisions I’ve made were further examples of how I have grown this blog slowly (and my own way). (And speaking of how I make money, I also shared what it’s like to budget with extremely irregular income—including real numbers! For those who are curious, my total income for 2017 was around $76,000.)

Experiment #9: Slow Travel

spend a week in NYC (Nov 3-10)

spend a week in Toronto (Nov 11-18)

spend a week at home (Nov 1-2, 19-23)

spend a week or so in Victoria (Nov 24-Dec 3?)

enjoy downtime in every city :)

For November, I almost had no choice but to do the slow travel experiment—because I was gone for most of the month! In that post, I wrote about why I set travel intentions vs. make travel plans. I also wrote about how every good trip makes you appreciate home. <3

Experiment #10: Slow Evenings

no work / social media after 7pm

after work, write down the next day’s schedule / to-do list

no TV / phone after 8pm (and definitely not in bed)

read a book every night (probably in the bathtub)

create / practice / share my new bedtime routine

Finally, there’s one experiment I haven’t updated you on yet, and that’s the slow evening experiment. Even though I didn’t have a plan for which order I would do all of these experiments in, I had a feeling it would come full circle with this one—and I was right. Unfortunately, it didn’t really go as planned. I had a feeling it might not, because I knew how much work I had to do (and how stressed I was) in December. But I wanted to try it anyway, and can now share some of the results.

I will start by saying that while I had the freedom to work slowly for most of the rest of the year, that didn’t feel like an option in December. With my first book launch just weeks away, there was a lot of work that needed to be done. So the to-do list was long, and any extra task that was added to it seemed to double my anxiety. Then I started hearing that Amazon was going to ship it 5 weeks early and my anxiety doubled (or maybe quadrupled) yet again. In the process of trying to get that mistake corrected, I had a full-blown meltdown that I had to quite literally pick myself up off the floor from. (Note that I laughed at myself too, during this particular meltdown. But they are always eye-opening, aren’t they?)

The biggest problem was that I didn’t sleep much, in the first half of the month. I did have slow evenings, long baths, read from a book, etc. And I could fall asleep easily. But then I would wake up between 3:30-4:30am each morning and that was it—I was just up for the day (thank you, anxiety). I managed to get through the week, but noted that the two big meltdowns I had both happened on Friday mornings—likely because I was completely exhausted and my body was just shutting down by then. After a few conversations about this with close friends, I knew I didn’t want to remember the book launch as something that I hated. I was ok with it being busy, but I also wanted to look back and have some good memories from it. With that, I shifted my strategy and decided to cut back on a lot of commitments (and pressures I’d put on myself) and do things slowly. That had been working for me all year, and I have to believe it will work for me now and in the future.

As for the rest, I had good intentions with the no work after 7pm and no phone/TV after 8pm thing, in the beginning. But that also slipped away, as time passed and life changed. When there are only so many hours in a day, sometimes you can’t log off at 7pm, because it means the work really won’t get done. And when your best friend is going through a tough time, you don’t say, “sorry, I can’t talk after 8pm”. I have learned to create boundaries for myself and my relationships, but that will never be one of them. Now, even though it wasn’t a very successful experiment, the one thing I will consider a success is that I think about this every evening now. Just yesterday, I thought about how it was time to shut down my computer and have a bath and read a book. And the experiment is over. I don’t have to do this, but I now have the habit of at least thinking about it—and awareness is often what prompts change. So, overall, I am glad I at least attempted to do this experiment, and I think it’s one I’ll be considering how to bring forward in my future. Maybe after the book launches, haha.

So, that’s it! My year of slow living experiments is complete. And I hope it’s been obvious to anyone reading this, or anyone who was following along all year, but the goal was never to complete each experiment perfectly or cross anything off a list. It was simply to slow down, check-in with myself and consider which area of my life might need a little more attention. At the end of the day, that’s all I was doing: paying attention to what was causing me any kind of anxiety or stress, and then giving it the time + attention it needed to feel better. If you attempt something similar, I hope you’ll come at it the same way. <3

Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

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fesahaawit · 7 years ago

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Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments

Experiment #1: Slow Mornings

wake up naturally

make the bed

eat breakfast

enjoy my coffee

read a book (audiobooks work too)

Experiment #2: Slow Money

set new financial goals for 2017

track my spending / make sure it aligns with new goals

change my budgeting strategy

change my investing strategy

analyze / find ways to reduce business expenses

bonus: file my taxes (or at least input all the numbers)

Experiment #3: Slow Move

go through all of my belongings again / only pack what I want to keep

sell / donate everything I don’t want to bring with me

make a list of things I think I want to buy (like a standing desk)

settle into my new home, before actually buying anything

reach out and make plans with new friends :)

Experiment #4: Slow Breathing

have slow mornings

do yoga 10x (short practices are fine)

meditate for 7 days in a row

listen to audiobooks/podcasts on this subject

go floating at the end of the month

Experiment #5: Slow Technology

do a 30-day social media detox (April 29th – May 28th)

figure out the role I want social media to play in my life

check / reply to email less often (also experiment with not checking on my phone)

figure out the role I want technology to play in my life (phone, computers, TV, etc.)

read from a book every day

June – No Experiment

Experiment #6: Slow Food

eat mostly* home-cooked meals

*eat out max. once/week at restaurants that use locally-sourced ingredients

swap out some ingredients for stuff that can be sourced in Squamish or BC

switch back to a vegetarian diet

eat slowly :)

Experiment #7: Slow Consumption!? Sure, let’s go with that. ;)

complete a 30-day shopping ban (August 3rd – September 1st)

do a small declutter/purge + take inventory of some of my stuff

organize my digital life (inbox, blog post drafts folder, files/folders, pictures, etc.)

do some values + goal-setting exercises

get back into alignment with myself :)

September – 30 Days in Nature

For this fresh start, I knew the one thing I needed more than anything else was to spend more time outdoors again. I documented this slow living experiment on my Instagram account.

Experiment #8: Slow Work

track how many hours I work every day (and how many per project)

set realistic expectations of what I can get done (with timelines)

explore other creative outlets (this could be fun – stay tuned!)

share how I slowly grew my blog (incl. dollars + blog stats)

share plans for what’s next :)

Experiment #9: Slow Travel

spend a week in NYC (Nov 3-10)

spend a week in Toronto (Nov 11-18)

spend a week at home (Nov 1-2, 19-23)

spend a week or so in Victoria (Nov 24-Dec 3?)

enjoy downtime in every city :)

Experiment #10: Slow Evenings

no work / social media after 7pm

after work, write down the next day’s schedule / to-do list

no TV / phone after 8pm (and definitely not in bed)

read a book every night (probably in the bathtub)

create / practice / share my new bedtime routine

Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

0 notes

fesahaawit · 7 years ago

Text

Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments

Experiment #1: Slow Mornings

wake up naturally

make the bed

eat breakfast

enjoy my coffee

read a book (audiobooks work too)

Experiment #2: Slow Money

set new financial goals for 2017

track my spending / make sure it aligns with new goals

change my budgeting strategy

change my investing strategy

analyze / find ways to reduce business expenses

bonus: file my taxes (or at least input all the numbers)

Experiment #3: Slow Move

go through all of my belongings again / only pack what I want to keep

sell / donate everything I don’t want to bring with me

make a list of things I think I want to buy (like a standing desk)

settle into my new home, before actually buying anything

reach out and make plans with new friends :)

Experiment #4: Slow Breathing

have slow mornings

do yoga 10x (short practices are fine)

meditate for 7 days in a row

listen to audiobooks/podcasts on this subject

go floating at the end of the month

Experiment #5: Slow Technology

do a 30-day social media detox (April 29th – May 28th)

figure out the role I want social media to play in my life

check / reply to email less often (also experiment with not checking on my phone)

figure out the role I want technology to play in my life (phone, computers, TV, etc.)

read from a book every day

June – No Experiment

Experiment #6: Slow Food

eat mostly* home-cooked meals

*eat out max. once/week at restaurants that use locally-sourced ingredients

swap out some ingredients for stuff that can be sourced in Squamish or BC

switch back to a vegetarian diet

eat slowly :)

Experiment #7: Slow Consumption!? Sure, let’s go with that. ;)

complete a 30-day shopping ban (August 3rd – September 1st)

do a small declutter/purge + take inventory of some of my stuff

organize my digital life (inbox, blog post drafts folder, files/folders, pictures, etc.)

do some values + goal-setting exercises

get back into alignment with myself :)

September – 30 Days in Nature

For this fresh start, I knew the one thing I needed more than anything else was to spend more time outdoors again. I documented this slow living experiment on my Instagram account.

Experiment #8: Slow Work

track how many hours I work every day (and how many per project)

set realistic expectations of what I can get done (with timelines)

explore other creative outlets (this could be fun – stay tuned!)

share how I slowly grew my blog (incl. dollars + blog stats)

share plans for what’s next :)

Experiment #9: Slow Travel

spend a week in NYC (Nov 3-10)

spend a week in Toronto (Nov 11-18)

spend a week at home (Nov 1-2, 19-23)

spend a week or so in Victoria (Nov 24-Dec 3?)

enjoy downtime in every city :)

Experiment #10: Slow Evenings

no work / social media after 7pm

after work, write down the next day’s schedule / to-do list

no TV / phone after 8pm (and definitely not in bed)

read a book every night (probably in the bathtub)

create / practice / share my new bedtime routine

Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

0 notes

fesahaawit · 7 years ago

Text

Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments

Experiment #1: Slow Mornings

wake up naturally

make the bed

eat breakfast

enjoy my coffee

read a book (audiobooks work too)

Experiment #2: Slow Money

set new financial goals for 2017

track my spending / make sure it aligns with new goals

change my budgeting strategy

change my investing strategy

analyze / find ways to reduce business expenses

bonus: file my taxes (or at least input all the numbers)

Experiment #3: Slow Move

go through all of my belongings again / only pack what I want to keep

sell / donate everything I don’t want to bring with me

make a list of things I think I want to buy (like a standing desk)

settle into my new home, before actually buying anything

reach out and make plans with new friends :)

Experiment #4: Slow Breathing

have slow mornings

do yoga 10x (short practices are fine)

meditate for 7 days in a row

listen to audiobooks/podcasts on this subject

go floating at the end of the month

Experiment #5: Slow Technology

do a 30-day social media detox (April 29th – May 28th)

figure out the role I want social media to play in my life

check / reply to email less often (also experiment with not checking on my phone)

figure out the role I want technology to play in my life (phone, computers, TV, etc.)

read from a book every day

June – No Experiment

Experiment #6: Slow Food

eat mostly* home-cooked meals

*eat out max. once/week at restaurants that use locally-sourced ingredients

swap out some ingredients for stuff that can be sourced in Squamish or BC

switch back to a vegetarian diet

eat slowly :)

Experiment #7: Slow Consumption!? Sure, let’s go with that. ;)

complete a 30-day shopping ban (August 3rd – September 1st)

do a small declutter/purge + take inventory of some of my stuff

organize my digital life (inbox, blog post drafts folder, files/folders, pictures, etc.)

do some values + goal-setting exercises

get back into alignment with myself :)

September – 30 Days in Nature

For this fresh start, I knew the one thing I needed more than anything else was to spend more time outdoors again. I documented this slow living experiment on my Instagram account.

Experiment #8: Slow Work

track how many hours I work every day (and how many per project)

set realistic expectations of what I can get done (with timelines)

explore other creative outlets (this could be fun – stay tuned!)

share how I slowly grew my blog (incl. dollars + blog stats)

share plans for what’s next :)

Experiment #9: Slow Travel

spend a week in NYC (Nov 3-10)

spend a week in Toronto (Nov 11-18)

spend a week at home (Nov 1-2, 19-23)

spend a week or so in Victoria (Nov 24-Dec 3?)

enjoy downtime in every city :)

Experiment #10: Slow Evenings

no work / social media after 7pm

after work, write down the next day’s schedule / to-do list

no TV / phone after 8pm (and definitely not in bed)

read a book every night (probably in the bathtub)

create / practice / share my new bedtime routine

Reflections on a Year of Slow Living Experiments posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

0 notes