#if anybody has any other questions i'm always happy to answer!!

[alexandriaellisart]

I'm absolutely obsessed with the watercolor sketchbook page u just posted!!! 💜✨💜✨

Do you do the linert first with waterproof pen, then colour it, or watercolours first, then pen? I want to refine my watercolor techniques, so looking for insight!!! Absolutely beautiful art, once again!!! 💜💜

thank you so much!!! ^-^ i'm kinda surprised anybody even liked the watercolor drawings lol, they're pretty far outside my normal stuff and i was kinda on the fence about posting them at all! :P

I use a fountain pen that i fill up with waterproof ink, do the drawing, then paint over it with watercolors!! my art's really drawing/line based, so it's a lot easier for me than doing the colors first, then inking!

also i have a faq page that is currently being worked on by me lol, but eventually i want to have lists of supplies and the stuff i use there!

[astaroth1357]

We Need To Talk About Nightbringer (the Person, Not the Game)

I'm still scratching my head over what Nightbringer's goal is here... How is MC involved? Why send them back in time? And, of course, who are they??

SPOILERS Up to Lesson 12 Below Cut

The Fuck is the Goal Here??

Sending the MC back just to form pacts makes no goddamn sense. If the MC acquiring pacts was the real aim, then that mission was already accomplished in the present-day. There's something more here.

Why send MC back to RIGHT NOW? What about making pacts AT THIS TIME is desirable to Nightbringer? Is the end game even having the pacts at all...?

I posit that Nightbringer wants war, specifically, another war between angels and demons. The imagery of scales brings to mind the fragile balance of peace that Diavolo was mentioning between the realms before. RAD isn't built yet, his goal to improve relations is still in its infancy, and the times are so tumultuous that MC risks an all out fight starting just being there. So if Nightbringer wants to make things come to blows, then this is the PERFECT time to send them to.

However...

What is this "path to happiness" all about? What does Nightbringer think will make the MC most happy...? And what about THEIR happiness is linked to his? Is he assuming that in a war of the three realms, MC would side with the demons and thus if demons win then MC will be glad? That doesn't really track with the MC as presented in game... They're generally shown as a peacemaker or bridge builder. I don't think a war would make them happy at all!

Ultimately, I don't think we can answer this question in any way that makes sense until we have a better idea of WHO Nightbringer is so....

Who is Nightbringer??

It's Barbs

This goes for any version of Barbs: past, present, future, or even an alternate self I guess. This only makes sense because we're dealing with a demon who does time travel and there's only one demon we know who fits this bill but... why?

I can't imagine any reason why Barbatos would betray Diavolo, at least the one we know. This guy is so loyal to his lord that he's the ONLY character who won't completely kowtow to MC's whims even in the OG game. His true loyalty was always to Diavolo. Not the realm, not demons, DIAVOLO. And if Diavolo seeks peace, then why on earth would Barbs want to cause a war?? Is he more bitter about things than we thought...?

If it's a different version of Barbs, then I guess this goes out the window, but even then what's an alternate Barbs care about this world specifically? What would he hope to gain? MC? Why?? The means are all here, but I just can't figure out the motive, so...

It's Not Barbs, but Connected to Barbs

You know. I've been thinking a lot about this and I've been considering how, thematically, it could be appropriate for Diavolo not to be the only one with a progenitor/parental figure out of commission. We can assume that Daddy Devil must of had an attendant like Barbatos to aid him like Dia has Barbs so...

What if Nightbringer is the old King's previous attendant? And what's more, what if they aren't Barbs but related to Barbs? Like a sibling or parent? It's important to note that Barbs' time capabilities are not INTERNAL to him. It's his room of doorways to other timelines. Presumably, anybody with sufficient knowledge could inherit that room and just take over the role of the Devildom's time lord.

I know it goes against all of our previous notions to think that Barbatos was, at some point, just an everyday demon and not some primordial, OG force of nature but none of that was canon anyway. Something to think about.

It's Michael

I know people keep offering up this one, but I'm really not buying it... Yeah, Michael has always been this looming, shady figure over the OM universe and he's canonically and non-canonically done some eyebrow raising shit, but what's the motive here? Plus, Nightbringer's thematic ties to, well, night really feel more demon than angel... The Celestial Realm is always sunny, the Devildom is always dark. I think it's just a stretch...

Michael wanting another war could be interesting, especially since we've seen far more of angels being actively antagonistic to demons than the other way around, but I don't think that makes him Nightbringer. At most, he could end up being a shadow ally in his plot to bring everything to a head once again.

It's Solomon

In truth, even I don't think Nightbringer is the Solomon we're talking to. But I still think it's suspicious that all of this plays out so perfectly for our present-day Solo-pal... Personally, I take anything this guy tells us directly with a grain of salt since we know he'll lie openly, so here are the facts we're working with:

We are interacting with our present day Solomon (or at least one with knowledge of who we are and our timeline's events).

Solomon is the only one in this current space who knows of our full history in the OG timeline.

This Solomon put himself not only in the position of being the ONLY ONE who knows us that we can interact with, but happily isolated us from the brothers and made himself our main point of contact.

And last (and perhaps most importantly) HE'S STILL TRYING TO MAKE PACTS. He approaches Lucifer about it and successfully makes a pact with Asmo centuries before he's supposed to! If my guy is really from the present, that's like, Changing the Course of History 101! What the hell???

Let me present to you a theory. He is not present-day Solomon, sent back to help MC. He is past-Solomon, caught up to MC's identity through Barbs' time powers and just playing the part of our modern-day buddy. If he's from the past, he doesn't have to worry about changing the present timeline like we do because that ain't even him we've been speaking to. It feels like he has this bet going with Nightbringer... they have some kind of wager and MC is key to it. They're the one who'll tip the scales and Solomon is trying to get us to stay on his side.

It's Not Solomon, but Connected to Solomon

There's something off about Solomon that everybody, LITERALLY everybody, makes comments on: how he doesn't seem human anymore.

The OM timeline introduced the idea that a person can become something else, no matter what they started out as. The brothers were angels, but they fell, so they became demons. Simeon violated angel rules, so he was made into a human. The idea of corruption related to Solomon has always stuck in the back of my mind... The guy has over 70 pacts, he's lived for several centuries at least, and there's just something NOT RIGHT about him...

When Solomon and Nightbringer are speaking to each other, this line stuck out to me.

I find this comment so damn weird. If Nightbringer is a demon and has always been a demon, why would Solomon feel the need to lampshade this? He's pointing it out as if it's meant to get under Nightbringer's skin... Why state the obvious?

What if Nightbringer wasn’t always a demon?

Nightbringer refers to and brings up his demonness as much as Solomon brings up his humanness. That, to me, reeks of insecurity. They may not just be fighting on the lines between demons and humanity, but fighting each other/themselves to prove who's side they're actually on.

What if Nightbringer is a fully-corrupted Solomon? Either a Solomon in the future who's fucking around with the past or a Solomon in this timeline/dimension that's trying to use MC to cause destruction for his world??

..... Okay, I do know this is a bit of a reach. As much as I would love to blame the sorcerer, Nightbringer still seems like a being who's just... been around a while. Far too long to start fucking up shit now. It's possible that if he is from the future and just hopping through time, there's nothing stopping him from going back however far he wants to, but then you could get into the "You are your own grandfather" paradox and the next thing you know we're in another installment of Kingdom Hearts where time is our worst enemy.

HOWEVER, the idea of corruption DOES bring me to my wildest theory yet.

What if Nightbringer wants MC to become a demon...?

Think about it.

It could explain why Solomon is trying so hard to make MC remember and side with their humanity.

It could explain why Nightbringer sent them there under the guise of demon to start with.

It could be why he wants them to make their pacts again. He's trying to seduce them into fully embracing the demonic world through their connection with the brothers.

Humans die, right? Why not be a demon and not have to worry about it?

Throw away the Ring of Light.

Stay by your demons' sides.

Embrace the darkness.

Join the damned.

And when that big'ol battle that he wants happens, he'll have the most powerful sorcerer/sorceress, fully demonized, fighting for his side against God himself.

..... Or that's my spec script anyway. Probably too out there, but man would it be fun...

[crimeronan]

I feel like Luz “Separation Anxiety” Noceda would be a bit dismayed upon learning that Vee and her friends are going to graduate and go to college at the end of the school year (presuming that Freshman Sophomore Junior Senior are Human Realm Exclusive Terms)

Like “oh my entire social life actually revolves around you and your friends because I’m too awkward and different to know how to approach people and am too nice and accommodating to any and everyone because of The Horrors to tell anybody to back off if they get too nosy so truly I cannot fathom how I’m going to function in a school setting without you but it’s Fine :) I’m really happy for you and not at all going to cry about this :)))”

Maybe she’ll join the school band to try and become socially independent and then just get really sad cause she misses Raine :(((

baby girl :(

i think she'd have a kind of tough time in a school environment to begin with, honestly. i made a post to that effect earlier but decided it was too depressing and deleted it.... but! since i ended up thinking a LOT about how her school experience would be handled. the gist was:

she'd have a really good 504 plan in place -- 504 plans are written plans that help students with disabilities stay in a normal classroom. it would have accommodations like her getting pre-written notes about what they'd discuss in class, a slightly separate desk to avoid being unexpectedly touched by other students, blanket permission to step out into the hallway if she gets nervous, extra time on tests, etc.

she'd purposefully be matched with the friendliest teachers and the easiest graders, people who are Very willing to talk with her about her needs. and also to say "i'm not upset with you." probably the really relaxed english teacher from TTT is one of them. this occasionally does remind her of raine and make her feel incredibly guilty/sad :(

and i think she'd have a one-on-one aide assigned to sit with her and show her what she's supposed to do in a classroom and help her navigate between classes. most likely this person is with her all day except for during lunch periods, when she takes her break....

this definitely marks luz Other by the student body (as having a paraprofessional does for every kid in a mainstream classroom) but she actually does not mind it! it feels like being guarded & she's grateful to have someone telling her what to do.

(in my head the aide's name is miss delilah and she's an OC who exists purely to be really kind and understanding. because please god give luz this.)

even with all of this, though....

classrooms are not Easy for luz. in the canon, she has CRIPPLINGLY hyperactive ADHD and can't focus on anything going on. she's weird and offputting and exuberant and causes ten million problems.

here, she has a LOT of baggage from belos. not just the physical trauma, but also everything she's internalized about How To Behave. she's learned a lot about how not to annoy him. and school is a public-facing event, which means she's in full Gracious Princess Mode. trying to make herself as small and unobtrusive as possible

so all of her concentration goes into Sitting Still and Being Quiet. she can't anxiously stim without disrupting the classroom, she can't chatter without annoying people, she can't chew through pencils or rip up paper without attracting Concern.

this is. incredibly stressful!! for her!!

stressful enough that she can't really retain anything the teacher says in classes. her homework is always done and her notes are always neat, but her quiz and test scores are Abysmal. because she either can't process the questions or can't remember the answers. because being in the classroom is Hard

which just adds another layer of stress. luz is like. PLEASE don't tell my mom. please please please please please don't tell my mom :(

vee doesn't really understand this -- she Loves the classroom. loves to sit at a desk and participate in discussion. loves to do worksheets. loves to get good grades and be a pleasure to have in class. Behaving Normally is a lot less stressful for vee than it is for luz.

which makes luz even clingier, when she can have lunch with vee or see her between classes. she's microdosing on being in the company of someone who feels Normal And Fine. and who has friends who clearly feel Normal And Fine. and who don't mind if luz is weird around them

luz being like oh!! you're going away. i see :) um. congratulations!! i'll be right back. i need to lock myself in the shower and cry so hard i throw up.

[apolloslyrics]

What does “courting to be a godspouse mean”? /genq

Hi! Thank you for asking!! This is gonna be a LONG post haha.

To understand courting, I have to explain godspousql itself. Lots of people don't necessarily understand godspousal (and courting), and it means something different for everyone; I'll do my best to explain how I see it, and how I'm practicing it.

Godspousal is a lot "simpler" (and yet very serious) for me than what others might see it. It's an oath that you make to a deity to bind yourself to them for a lifetime (or more!). There are many different forms of spousal (romantic, platonic, familial, devotional). But in its core, it's an oath.

Don't get me wrong- oaths are VERY serious, and should not ever be taken lightly. Minors shouldn't engage in oaths in general, especially not spousal; deities are not going to court a minor for this reason. Remember, it's binding. There isn't really a way to turn back once it happens.

Onto the main part of your question: Courting. So, courting is basically a period of trials. It's a time to figure out if you and the deity you might make an oath to are compatible. Sometimes, during courting, you might find that you and the deity do not work together. That's okay! You can always call off the oath before you make it.

In my practice, I'm "romantically" courting a deity. This isn't necessarily the same as dating. It's actually a lot different. The mortal still has a high amount of respect for the deity. The deity still sees the mortal as just that; a mortal. The difference is that there is an attraction to each other. You will have small disagreements, possibly arguments, but they should never lead to disrespect. Communication is huge in godspousal.

You see many times in mythology that our deities have relationships with mortals. It's sort of like that!

People will also compare godspousal to nuns; after all, they are known as Jesus's wives.

My spouse and I haven't been courting for very long, but it's been wonderful so far (albeit a disagreement here and there). The whole concept of godspousal can be confusing as heck, so if anybody needs clarification or a more in-depth explanation, I'm happy to answer any questions!

Love yall 🫶 your practice is valid!!! Take care of yourselves!

[lilydaisylily]

Hi, so umm this is my 2nd writing, which has a lot of wording from the previous one. I'm still learning and trying to put the perfect word for this story and I hope you enjoy it!

Lots of love,

Lily♡

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Title: I love you (part 1)

Pairing: Choi Seungcheol x Y/N (readers)

Genre: Angst, smut

Thanks and happy reading!

Do not copy. All right reserved.

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"Congratulation to Svt Inc. for winning their nth win-"

You don't know how many awards there is that Svt Inc. have won for this past 2 weeks. You tried to avoid taking part in any of them as Choi Seungcheol, the Svt Inc.'s president/CEO and your now ex boyfriend, just broke up with you over a very heartbroken breakup.

"Y/N, I think I can't do this anymore."

You stop everything that you do when you heard his voice through the call that you've answered.

"What do you mean by that, Cheollie?" You tried to sound clueless with his sudden statement although you always knew that this day will come biting you anytime soon. You already felt something was off when many days back, he tried to avoid as many skinship as possible between the two of you.

From your experience dating him for almost 2 years now, Choi Seungcheol that you knew will not let any hand holding and pecking your lips when you two meet up to go to waste. He will ALWAYS, ALWAYS be the one whose most eager to do so. But these past few days makes you wonder where on earth does this relationship went wrong as the both of you are giving a balanced give and take part between each other.

Both of you are the most peaceful and harmonized couple there is, based on what other Svt Inc.'s bosses slash Seungcheol's best friends and your own besties said. So where is the fault in this relationship that has grown you and Seungcheol apart, you wonder.

"I don't think I want to continue this relationship with you anymore, Kim Y/N." Seungcheol stated the very sentence that break your heart into pieces.

"Why are saying this? Don't you love me anymore?" You tried very hard to hold back your tears as you questioned him.

There's a moment of silent on the other side of the line and you knew that this will be the final goodbye. "May I know the reason why you are doing this?" You asked him softly to avoid any more heart break.

"I just don't feel the same for you anymore, y/n-ya. I tried to mend it, tried to salvage any love that I have left for you, but I just can't. The love is gone, y/n, and the last thing I want is to hurt you because of me. That's why I'm being honest with you right now to avoid any more hurt between us in the future."

"Is that all the reason you can think of? Just like that? How can you think you hurt me less with whatever bullshit that you're saying right now?"

Still greeted with a silent moment from the other side that you've decided to just end this drama once and for all.

With a freshly shattered heart, you muster up any little energy that you have left and said the final word to him,

"I always thought or tried to think that you need your own space, which I respect that and give in to you always. But turns out I was wrong,"

You pause your word for a second before continue.

"I always thought that we can be like this forever. Gosh, maybe forever is never going to be enough for us. You have no idea how many times do I always think to settle down with you, knowing that I have never fall in love this deep with anybody else other than you. If you think that being honest with me like this won't hurt me, well, let me tell you that it hurts like hell, Cheol-ah. You broke my heart, Choi Seungcheol. You really did. If you really want this to be over between us, that you have no more feelings for me, then I have no other words to say to you. But let me make this clear. It is you who want to end this, and I hope you won't regret it, Choi Seungcheol. I knew there is a new owner of your heart now, and I fully understand. Thank you for the past 2 years, Choi Seungcheol. I hope you find your freedom and happiness you've always dream of. Sorry for everything."

That was the very last words from you and you end the call before he can even revert.

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It's been over 2 weeks after the breakup call and Choi Seungcheol's dark circle becoming even more visible and obvious.

"Dude, you look terrible." Kwon Soonyoung, one of the big bosses at Svt Inc. that just come by to put whatever award that he received on behalf of this soon-to-be-panda on the award shelves.

Another footsteps heard coming from the door revealing Joshua and Jeonghan, the dashing duo whom looked alike, and think so much alike too.

"What on earth are you guys doing here exactly?" Sighing, Seungcheol lean on his dark blue leather chair, closing his eyes.

"Well, we're here to beat some sense in you of course. You know, after the UNANNOUNCED breakup call." Mingyu suddenly popped out of nowhere and voiced out his utmost discontent. "How could you do this to her, hyung? She's my best friend for god sake!" He continued.

"Cut it off, Gyu. I've heard enough of this." Warn Seungcheol. After the breakup call, he told all the other 12 friends of his and well, the news did not settle well between them. Honestly, it did not settle well with himself too. He's feeling somewhat discomfort and unsettling regret after the final words that you've said on that day. He keeps on replaying your words over and over again until he's losing sleep, resulting to his current dark circle.

"I just want to know one thing, though. Why on earth are you breaking up with Y/N exactly? It can't be because of your slutty, shitty little new secretary right?" The question asked by Joshua really hit the nail on the head.

Silence engulfed the spacious space, leaving only some soft murmur from the people working outside to be heard.

"It does related to that, huh? How could you, hyung? Does Y/N still not enough for you? She's beautiful, smart, funny, kind hearted, and shit, she's hella cool CEO too for god sake! What more could you ask for?" Mingyu snarled.

"Gyu has a point, Cheol-ah. Compared to that slutty secretary, Y/N obviously the winner here. That Jessica can only provide you temporary happiness while she's counting your money along the way. And from my calculation, you'll regret losing Y/N in the end, and that my friend, is a statement and you can count on my words." Said Jeonghan, smirking.

"Are you guys done?" Seungcheol opened his eyes and sigh, again.

After all the bosses retreating back to their offices, Jessica knock on Seungcheol's door and proceed to open it after she got a response from the man inside.

Closing the door and locked it, she's making her way to Seungcheol's desk, swaying her hips while unbuttoning her tight shirt's top two button to reveal her luscious cleavage.

Seungcheol eyes turned into a shade darker with lust, following her every move.

"You seems so stressed out, baby." Stopping behind his big chair, Jessica's slender fingers starting to massage Seungcheol's tense shoulder while having one hand unbuttoning his shirt. Seungcheol close his eyes as a burning sensation starting to pool around his stomach with every little touch from Jessica on his body.

"Let me make you feel better, baby." Jessica whisper a sultry remarks to Seungcheol's ear and soon soft moan and growl can be heard in the room.

Jessica is stradlling Seungcheol's lap while making out. The sexy moan that comes out from Jessica's mouth makes Seungcheol loosing his control and her grinding on his crotch is not helping. He rips her blouse apart and skillfully unhooked her bra, tossing it after. Her delicious tits comes in view and Seungcheol's head is clouded with strong desire to fuck her until she know nothing than to scream his name.

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Your hardly gained good night sleep is rudely interrupted by the sound of the bell ringing endlessly. Whoever that is at the door better have some good thing to say or else, you are going berserk. Tiredly dragging your body out of the bed, you checked your monitor screen before unlocking your door.

"What do you guys want?" You open up the door for Mingyu, Wonwoo and Bethany to step in and make themselves at home.

"Well, we are here to drag you out of course! You've been in this cave for long enough and I'm -well, we, are going to take you out for some sunshine and it looks to me that you really need some." Said Bethany while proceed to open your wall-length curtain that blocking the Sun from gracing your penthouse.

"I'm fine here Beth, don't worry." You said softly while yawning.

"You are not okay sweetheart, and we know it. I know you purposely avoiding office to avoid meeting that dumbass Seungcheol hyung. But you need to get out from here or else you'll get sick!" Mingyu stating his concern as you have become so quiet these past few weeks and it bothers him a lot.

Wonwoo's unsuccessful attempt to drag you out last week has brought him to bring these two people to his rescue as he know you can't ressist them no matter the excuse is.

Sighing, you just let Beth to drag you back into your room while bossing you to go take a shower. After making sure your water is running, Bethany proceed to your walk-in wardrobe to choose your outfit for today's outing.

A cute summer dress with puff sleeve has come to her view and she knows it will complement your figure perfectly.

Right on cue, the bathroom door opened, revealing your freshen up figure. Beth pull your hand and make you sit infront of your vanity table to doll you up. She told you to wear that summer dress she chose and you're giving her a-are you joking-look.

"What? Its pink, its cute and its perfect! I know my taste babygirl and you have to wear it! No excuse accepted." After touching up your makeup and boss you around some more, she exit your room for you to change your clothes.

"Do you think this is a good idea?" A bit of reluctant shading Wonwoo's eyes as he's afraid you won't agree with this plan that they arranged for you.

"She need to get back to her usual happy self, hyung or else her parents will kill us! They knew what happened between her and that dumbass of a hyung and they are not letting it escaping their mind, knowing their only daughter being hurt." Wonwoo and Beth can't help but to agree on Mingyu's statement.

You guys are close to each other because of your families's relationship. All family related with each other businesses and you guys can't help to be the best of friend because of that.

In the next second, the door of your room opened, revealing you in an outfit that will make all eyes on you in a good way possible. You are styling the pink summer dress Beth has chosen for you with a white bow gracing your low wavy ponytail, a cute white beads earring and a mini pink Dior leather handbag.

All your three best friend stunned for a while and you heard Mingyu said "If you looked THIS good before you start being my best friend, I might make you my girlfriend, babe. I really want to know what on earth does Cheol hyung think to breakup with you like that. Urghh, it's still pissing me off!" He grunted.

You tried to ignore Mingyu's remark about Seungcheol to avoid any more tears coming out from your already tired eyes.

"Where are guys taking me?"

Beth, Mingyu and Wonwoo's face suddenly sparkling up when you popped out the question and a naughty cheeky smile starting to grace their lips.

Mingyu and Wonwoo both making their ways to you and hooked their arm with yours, as a way of trapping you.

"You, my pretty girl, will be going on a date with someone we've arranged at a fancy cute cafe, where perhaps that cold heart of yours will be bloomed and happy again." Beth happily stating the idea and you starting to struggle out from those both muscular giant's grasp.

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Stay tuned!

Thank you for reading!

I love you guys!♡

[hellwurld]

sorry bestie but i need more challengers au. im dying. the dynamics, the crazy, itrs insane. lando why? is anybody gonna do anything???? wil the groupchat ever notice????? you leave me in suspense each time and its beautiful. thank you for posting and thank the government for thanksgiving vacation

never apologize for wanting more challengers au. i also want more but unfortunately (or very fortunately) i am the writer, so if i want more i have to actually write it lmfao! i'm glad that you're loving the fic so far, and if u have any requests of specific stuff u want to see, i'd be happy to post some snippets/side-stories here on tumblr!!! i always want to include MORE in the fic, but the last chapter was already 15k words, so i don't want to overwhelm lmfao. sorry for the suspense btw! i have a tendency to leave on cliffhangers and questions, but with an upload schedule like mine (read: a bad upload schedule), it's not rlly the best for a reader lol!

ALSO ! okay so while i know these questions are likely rhetorical, im gonna answer them anyway! so um, answers and other fun context below:

why is lando the way he is? he wants a job! unfortunately, formula 1 is a cutthoat space, and lando is worried about causing internal drama. he's a little insecure in his place on the team, specifically after hungary, so he doesn't want to start shit with oscar. he's ignoring logan purely because he will feel too guilty to not do something if he actually watches the video and pays attention, so he's choosing to ignore him so he won't have to confront the situation! sad! basically, lando feels bad for logan, but he doesn't want to get involved in something that has so much history and mess attached, because he doesn't want to risk hurting the situation, and himself, more. a crucial part of this fic to me is the theme of selfishness and personal benefit vs the betterment of the whole, and formula 1 drivers need to be selfish, which lando is, for better or for worse.

it depends what you mean by do anything. you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. the ptsd group chat just tries to support logan as much as they can, but logan isn't looking to leave oscar, and they can't just kidnap a grown man so... they're a bit stuck. stuff will happen tho, i promise!

the larger f1 groupchat will notice! soon! i promise!!! they're wrapped up in their own stuff, and the people that do have an inkling of what's going on are keeping their mouths shut, but something is bound to break. it's all just a matter of when.

[chaosteddybear]

How about Eros 1 & 4, Philia 1, 3 & 5, Storge 1 & 3 for Mix? 👀

WOW THANK YOU!!!! ❤️ Answering these all for Mix <3 <3

Eros 1: Is your OC romantic in the traditional sense? Do they enjoy giving or receiving gifts of flowers or confectionary? Or are there other courtship traditions from their culture of origin that are important to them?

Gods, yes. Mix is hyper romantic I think. Romantic++

He is always thinking of his love and wants to take care of them. Some "romantic" things he does for anyone in his pack but the true romance is saved for his love - he's very monogamous. So he may bring gifts back for everyone after a trip, but the one for his love will be much more extravagant and more thoughtful than the rest. There will be more of them as well.

He loves to write his feelings down in letters, and he loves to do things like stick up for them, serve them, all of that!

To be done romantic things FOR would drive him absolutely crazy. Why? Why would they do this! He would be bawling probably every time.

Eros 4: Do they believe in love at first sight? Have they ever developed a crush or romantic (or erotic) fixation upon a stranger based on their appearance alone?

TLDR not based on aesthetics but based on actions he does in a way! Answered here

Philia 1: Does your OC have a Best Friend? If they do then how long have they known each other and how did they meet? If they don't then do they have a close group of friends they love equally? Or are they more of a loner?

I think Sasli, Turgi, and Rowley are his best friends. First he met Turgi - she pulled him out of his Rambling Era by suggesting that he make a new family 😭 He needs her still for a while, and he loves her too (as a friend). They're inseparable and she does a lot of calling him on his shit...

Sasli... he will always be her most reliable and loving friend. Sure he wanted more. But he accepted early that he wouldn't get it, and why would that get in the way of still loving her in platonic ways? He and Turgi met Sasli together and brought her into the pack 🥺 so he knows her the most medium amount of the bunch, I suppose.

Rowley, well, this one is more interesting!!! Sasli is in love with Rowley, which I won't explain here, but that's how Mix meets him! Well. He is so skeptical at first. Honestly, a little jealous. But. He wants the best for Sasli, so he only gives real criticisms and only to his face, to see his reactions. The snark is pretty adorable, actually. Rowley (almost) always wins, putting Mix in his place. After a while, he warms up to Rowley a lot. And not only does he prove he is worthy of Sasli, but he also proves he is worthy for even more. Yea, Mix would kill for him. (tag @dmagedgoods for Rowley <3)

Philia 3: What qualities does your OC most value in a friend? Loyalty? Shared sense of humour? Or something else?

Value? In a friend? How about just existing? They don't owe him anything! How could they? What does he even deserve?

Haha, but really. I think for him the most important thing is loving the people he already loves. Or at least respecting them? Making them happy and not killing them? That would be enough, in some cases. Because his pack is fully under his protection, anybody who threatens them in any way will not make it through his front door!

Philia 5: What is their most fervent wish for their best friend(s)? How far would they go to make it happen?

This is such a tough question for Mix because who is he to decide what they do and don't get!

I suppose safety. His most selfish desire is for his friends to be safe and without harm. And yes, he will use all of his skills to ensure this happens. Maybe a bit trigger happy if I'm being honest.... He would go as far as needed. He would kill to keep his pack members safe.

Storge 1: Did your OC's parents love them unconditionally? If so then has this helped them feel confident as an adult? If not then how has this affected them? What were the conditions their family attached to their relationship?

Mix was lucky. His family loved him absolutely and unconditionally.

It .. Fuck, it DID give him confidence. Too much, really! He feels he really let them down, and it's made worse because they thought the world of him. That bittersweet line between "I'm a failure" and "I'm only a failure because I WASN'T THERE." He really feels like he let them down and he will probably never get over it.

However, they did give him maybe more freedom than a kid should have. So that's important to who he is too 😂 his little solo trips smh.

Storge 3: How far does parental approval (imagined or expressed) impact upon their current sense of self-worth? What might they sacrifice or attempt to achieve in order to ensure the approval of their parents?

Not at all to be honest. He really defines his self-worth on his own, but he sure is harsh about it..

The ask post

[magicmumu2]

Idk why I’m not following you????

Anyways.

If you don’t write it, I will. Add to my long list of stories to write.

(Okay last minute, on my phone, and using a text to speech reader 10 minutes after I woke up at ass crack of dawn in the morning. All I'm saying is this is not going to be classic literature here. You're more than welcome to do your own thing and expand on this idea or write your own version of this concept, because I'm sure I could read a dozen stories like it. Anyway here be the "fic?" and I hope it makes you feel better.)

Okay, so maybe they went through a period of stagnation or some kind of tragedy in their lives or they just stop being Power Rangers - something along those lines. Their marriage had not really been the same after whatever happened and they seem to be almost roommates for a while. And one day, nothing in particular happened. Kim just looked over at Trini who is probably doing something she's done literally every day for years, and Kim just struck with this italicized 'oh'. there's a little spark, a little fire. Something familiar yet almost forgotten. And suddenly Kim just wants to be where Trini is, or wants Trini to be wherever she is. She can't stop staring at her wife and she can't believe that this woman exists and can be called hers. At first Kim is almost shy about it. She's not sure why she feels this way suddenly, but why shouldn't she feel this way about her own wife, right? She finds herself going from room to room, pretending she isn't following her wife around the house as she does chores like a damn needy house cat. Sure, she got an eyebrow raise or two, but she didn't care because she got to stare at the most beautiful woman she's ever seen. Kim remembers jumping through the quarry, chasing after this girl. Now the chase isn't so difficult, at least not physically, the end goal more rewarding if she could get this woman to really talk to her again.

"What has gotten into you?" Trini asked her days later after Kim sat next to her on the couch and subtly moved closer throughout the course of the show they were watching so that eventually she was nearly in Trini's lap. "If you wanted to cuddle, all you had to do was ask. "Or just... cuddle me."

Could she? Kim had forgotten. Kim had forgotten again that this woman was hers. Her wife, her soulmate. She wasn't sure how long she had forgotten this. Still, there was something that felt wrong about feeling the way she felt now, like she should have felt this way all along or she shouldn't feel this way now after everything, after all this time of being married. She didn't know any happily married couples, and those who were happy together didn't last as long as her marriage was Trini, so she didn't know who she could ask about this. She took to the Internet, but wasn't sure exactly how to ask her question and instead decided to ask Reddit. (She wondered what Trini's reaction would be if she told her she was a simp for her now.) Mean comments, trolls, and posts making fun of her for even asking the question aside, Kim took the heart some of the people who were serious in responding to her. She even got a response from a marriage counselor who told her that relationships do go in and out of difficulty, but if the love is there, things can be worked on. The marriage counselor stated that obviously the love was still there and that the marriage is worth working on and Kim completely agreed. Other comments under that post continued on in that vein, advising Kim to enjoy the ride and take advantage of how she feels now by building on that. She placed her thanks on that post to anybody giving her advice on how she could go about doing that, and then she closed her laptop and went to their bedroom.

"Hey," she said after a moment of watching Trini, who was laying in bed reading a book.

Trini looked up, her eyes somewhat perplexed as they always were the past few days since what Kim calls her 'Awakening'. "Hey," she answered tentatively.

"So... I was thinking, maybe you and I can grab dinner tomorrow after work? I don't know what's playing these days, but maybe we can see a movie or something afterwards? It's kind of been a while."

"Kim, are you asking me on a date?"

"Yes, I am."

Trini's lip quirked at the side in a small smile. She looked shy, the way she did many years ago at the beginning of the relationship. It reminded Kim of the first time she had asked Trini out, shy and nervous despite them knowing each other for a while by then. Like that time, Kim didn't think she would be rejected, knowing how Trini felt the same for her, but she worried she would somehow fuck it up, because Kim seemed to always fuck it up.

"Yeah, okay." Trini closed her book after marking her place. She turned so that she was leaning on her side now and patted bed next to her. Kim obeyed, sitting next to her on the bed. Trini leaned upwards as much as she could on the awkward angle she found herself in, and Kim met her halfway in a kiss. Kim stared into Trini's eyes before she leaned in for a deeper kiss. She may not have understood how she felt, but she was not afraid to tell her wife then in that kiss. The words, simple enough, hopefully also conveyed the same. "I am stupidly in love with you, Trini Hart."

"You're just stupid," Trini teased.

"Rude, but stupid for you. Even if you are mean to me."

Trini smiled and then wrapped her arms around the back of Kimberly's neck. She pulled her down again for another kiss. "I love you too idiot. I'm stupidly in love with you too. Always."

The two women spent the rest of the night in each other's arms, and Kim remembered once again that this was where she belonged.

[horrorhot-line]

Hello!! I've been following you for years and I've always loved your work! I haven't been in my Saiki K phase for a loooong time, but I was interested in how you would continue the series. People shouldn't mind the editing of the stories. They are your works that you publish for free and I'm happy you found faith you feel comfortable in.

I would like to ask: will the new rewrite of the fic be sort of religious? Not in the sense of slow burn and not doing things before marriage, but the main character being religious and it being a recurrent theme in the story? I'm interested bc I consider myself agnostic and would not resonate with the character, but it's completely fine if that's what you have in mind!!

I'm sure the rewrite fic would be amazing! Your writing is incredible and I hold it very dearly bc it was one of the first works I've ever read in english when I was initially learning it. Pining and slow burns fics are actually more fun to me than smut will ever be so I'm sure in your hands will be a joy to read. Also, non-psychic saiki is a cool concept!

Regardless of your decision, I hope you know you are a great writer and should be fully supported in your choices regarding your work and personal beliefs! Hateful anons will sadly be a part of it, but every work has its audience and other people will find comfort in your words.

(I'm sorry if this is an awkward ask, I've never talked out of anon to anybody lol <3)

You came off anon to say all this? 😭 truly I’m touched, thank you so much this is so sweet, also your kind words mean the world thank you so much,

To answer your question of will the reader be religious? Absolutely not, I make it a habit to make the reader more relatable and to mention family of reader as little as possible because not every reader will have the same circumstances, and I feel it’s no longer an x reader but a self insert if I include too much detail about the reader (like mentioning hair, body type, and so on, or introducing ocs that are friends of readers or relatives and so on) so no religiousness here don’t worry, itll be very light editing and not much of the story will be changed just because I know a lot of people who’ve read my work like it as is, so for the most part I’ll just be getting rid of swear words, any dirty thoughts reader has and so on, and fixing grammar mistakes or adding more description where need be like explaining the setting or an expression on a character and stuff so I hope you’ll like it and if you enjoyed my story before then it’ll be the same amount of relatability if not more (I don’t think it’s fair just because I think a certain way and have different values that the reader has to think exactly like me, I might as well write a self indulgent insert at that point, that and it’ll pull whoever reads the story, out of the story if I go into too much detail about readers characteristics and so on I’ve read too many x readers that were just self inserts and I don’t think you guys should suffer through that 😭🤣)

I can’t believe my stories mean that much to you ;-;, you have no idea how happy it makes me that not only can I write but I can write well enough that people think back to my works, I am very very honoured thank you again 😭

I adore you, thank you so much for your support honestly 😭🩷🩷🩷

[delvalentine]

Hi!

I've been reading your fanfics since I was in middle school and I'm in college now, so that's really funny to think about lol.

I know that you've been writing for a really long time and you may have been asked this question before (I promise I tried to scroll through and look for a similar question, but I couldn't, so sorry if you've answered this multiple times before!!), but how do you stay motivated when writing?

I have a few writing projects that I've started on, but have yet to finish or publish because I always find something that could be fixed or changed. And whenever I try to write shorter, one-shot type fics, they end up being longer and I keep adding new ideas to them. But this ask is long enough as is, so I'll stop here.

I really love your work and I hope you're doing well!!!

A long-time fan ♥️

It’s so emotional for me to hear that my writing is impactful enough for people to keep reading it as they grow up with me 🥲 thank you so much for reaching out 🤧 & no need to apologize as I’m happy to answer any question or chat! I don’t think I’ve gotten this one yet either 😙

The simple answer is: I don’t stay motivated 💀

I have drafts I never go back to or publish. Fics I think about for years and years and suddenly 5 years have passed and I still haven’t finished it. I have plenty of incomplete stories on my page right now; some I still think about wanting to finish, and others that I’ve abandoned and moved on from. People come to ask and even beg me to finish fics, and I wish I could for their and my sakes, but creativity doesn’t come on command no matter how much you want it to. I tire out while writing a chapter and forget to go back for months. Even when I’ve planned out the whole story, I’ll still lose steam when it comes to actually writing it. The main thing is forgiveness; it’s okay.

I’m sure you’ve heard of motivation vs discipline. Nobody is motivated all the time; it’s impossible to be. Now that I’m a working adult I’ve lost the time and energy I used to have, so I end up prioritizing other things—but I’ve never felt the need to quit writing, because I still enjoy the process of it.

When I write fanfic, the goal is always just to have fun. Like you said, I’ve written fics for a long time; my first ever Big Time Rush Logan x OC on Quotev (when it was Quizzaz) was written ~2010. And I still write reader insert romance fics today even after I graduated university and got married 😂 and the only reason I would be able to keep doing something for so long is because I still find it enjoyable to craft stories!

It always helps when I receive reader feedback. I don’t think anybody should write with the main goal of hitting kudos goals or getting clout as it sort of takes the joy away from creation, but that’s my personal belief. Knowing people liked your hard work can make you feel validated and proud; but I think if you’re not proud even if 0 people left a like or comment, then there could be some introspection about why you’re writing something that doesn’t bring you, the author, joy.

It sounds like your concern is less that you have a block in creation and that you feel that it has to be perfect before you can release it for others in the public to read. Every artist feels this way; I myself reread my fics and wish I’d said this, or worded it a different way, added a scene, etc etc. But the base feelings I look for before I’m ready to hit publish:

- am I proud of this?

- did I convey my story meaningfully?

- if it’s a chapter, does it make me feel like I’d like to keep reading? Did it serve the purpose of answering questions posed earlier in the story?

Sometimes the philosophy “fuck it, we ball” and hitting publish without looking back is enough. It’s just a fic; if there’s some spelling errors or it’s boring to some or OOC to others or whatever—it doesn’t spell the end of the world. In fact, noticing flaws means you’re able to recognize areas that you’d like to grow in to become an even better author. The joy of online fanfic is that the genre is so broad and diverse. It’s all subjective. No matter what you put out, somebody’s put out something “better”, and somebody’s put out something “worse”, and people would still disagree in their personal opinions. If nobody read your writing, would you still feel proud reading it? Did you have enough fun writing your story that you’re keen to write the next one?

Sometimes writing and not publishing has value. Sometimes writing and not editing helps spark creativity or gives you a base of a different story. Sometimes dumping the skeleton of a draft in word dumps on a page without going back to edit until you’re done is what you need to complete your product. If your good ideas stay trapped in your head, I think it’s better to have at least the bare minimum down so you have something that you can edit and clean/fluff up to your liking instead of working yourself into circles and not having anything to show for it. A drill to help practice breaking that particular habit is setting timers and not allowing yourself to go back until the timer is over; this can train your brain to work in a continual flow rather than get tripped up and losing steam.

And I think one of the most important things for creators to do is ingest media from other creators. Read other peoples fics; what do you like about them and what might you do differently in your own style? Published books, TV, movies, etc. The more exposure you have, the more ideas you have available to draw from, and the more you can visualize how you want to tell your own story.

Another tip that helps me to achieve that writing flow is to see your fic/writing as visual media. How does your “movie” end? How would people write the synopsis for your “film”? Are these scenes actually necessary or is it awkward and taking up screen time? Might it be better for the scene to be earlier or later to help with the flow of the “movie”?

This in itself was more of a word dump than a concise answer, but I hope it’s helpful at least a little bit to your writing journey. TL;DR… just publish it 😉 if it’s got a beginning, middle, and end, it’s ready. You can always publish a rewrite (I’ve done that before!), so just trust yourself. There isn’t anybody you have to please online in the fanfic world except for yourself 😌

💌 Love, V

[scarlet--wiccan]

hi hope ur having a good day! sorry for the incoming stupid question but I didn't rlly know who else to ask. i plan on writing a mcu fic and wanda&pietro are going to be side characters in it, I don't like the fact that the mcu white washed them so I was planning on writing them as romani+Jewish but in one of your posts you discourage non-Roma to write Romani characters bc we might write them like a stereotype. should I write them as only Jewish or? thanks for reading

No, I would never tell you to erase or omit the fact that these characters are Romani. You should be able to include characters of color in your narrative without intruding on closed cultures or experiences that would be inappropriate for you to speak on.

In the past, I've stated that it's not appropriate for non-Romani people to write first-hand about Romani culture, community and upbringing. To that end, I would discourage anyone who is writing original fiction from using Romani characters as primary or POV protagonists. That doesn't mean you should never include Romani characters, however, rather than aiming for "authentic representation," you should focus on being aware of the social and historical contexts that apply to those characters and their circumstances. You can develop a sense of where a person comes from, what their family does, what kind of challenges they've faced, and things like that without digging into stuff like culture and customs. That may limit the scope of what you can represent-- you're not going to be writing about life inside a traditional community, for example-- but that's okay. You're just going to have to leave it to us to share those stories, if and when we choose.

With existing characters like Wanda and Pietro, it's tough because there are already so many voyeuristic and stereotypical depictions of their upbringing and their community in the canon. My goal has always been to sort through that material and identify the parts that are truthful or informative, and share them with proper context so that other fans can develop a better understanding of what these characters represent. I'm very happy to answer more specific questions about that, if you have any.

I don't know what the plot of your fanfic is, or how closely its going to hew to the M C U, but if you can do the research and figure out an appropriate, accurate way to fit European Romani characters into that setting, then more power to you. Personally, I think that those movies, especially the Avengers ones, kinda suck, and there's nothing salvageable about that version of Wanda or Pietro. It's not just that they're white, their story is an overall poor adaptation of the source material, and inserting Romani characters into those roles would actually create really awful, racist optics. These people are HYDRA collaborators, for fuck's sake. I don't think anybody, especially gadje, should be waste their time trying to "fix" the M C U Maximoffs.

[lunas-a-little-looney]

I'm still new to discovering I have a system (just got over that denial bridge a few weeks ago, and have been struggling mentally since (and before) then), and the system discourse online has been very... distressing? I want to lean into safe communities meant for learning about or exploring (my own) CDD, and find some sort of comraderie.

I don't understand what's happening really - I don't exactly understand endogenic systems, but I also don't understand why people would be anti-endogenic. It just seems... hateful. And purposeless.

I've seen tons of anti-endo posts (before I learned what endo meant) that made me terrified to lean too heavily into traumagen spaces (if they could say this about awful stuff about one group of people, what could they say about me? *it is very much a learned response from trauma, but it is what it is I guess*

I guess the point is to ask if you were ever anti-endo, and what has it been like since you started making pro-endo posts? I know it's silly, but I'm trying to figure all of this out and I'm terrified of receiving hate for refusing to hate someone because of how they identify

Thanks (and sorry for the book lol)

- Host

First I want to say it's not silly at all!! Being a newly discovered system is overwhelming and it's normal to want to have a community of those who understand you. It's also normal to want to avoid being harassed and fakeclaimed. I'm happy you reached out! This reply is going to be kinda long (sorry I tried to keep it short) but I did my best to address all your questions. I hope this helps! And I wish you the best on your new journey of self discovery!!

Second I would strongly recommend that you stay away from syscourse if you can. It's really draining and overwhelming even for us and we have a pretty good handle on our system. As a newly discovered system it's going to be even worse.

Unfortunately I don't have any specific recommendations for cdd focused spaces which accept endos (if anybody knows one put it in the replies!) but I will say that pro endo servers, even if they aren't focused on cdds can still be amazing for finding comradery. There will be other cdd systems there and you might find some endos who you relate to as well. Also if you want my dms are open! I'm just one person (well, not exactly) but I'd be happy to answer any questions you might have and suggest ways to help you figure out your system more!

As for why people are anti endo I think it mainly comes down to two things. First is that they think endos are saying they experience the same thing as cdd systems except without the trauma. Endos do not generally claim this*. Second is that people who've spent significant amounts of their lives under attack sometimes they start to see threats where there aren't any.

These systems have debilitating mental illnesses that are criminally misunderstood and romanticized. For them being a system is intrinsically linked with being deeply traumatized, they are not separate. So when they see a community of people claim to have systems but not trauma, they get upset. They feel like that's not possible, because it isn't possible to be a system like *theirs* without trauma. They get frustrated because they think people just want the "quirky" parts of their disorder without the painful ones. That's why they always say endos are faking did, because they can't imagine a system that doesn't have a cdd. They think endos are just people who want to feel special so they claim to have system. Once endos started becoming a part of the community, anti endos felt invaded because now there's a bunch of systems who don't have cdds in the space they thought was for them (keep in mind cdd focused spaces still exist, its just that the plural community as a whole isn't 100% focused on us anymore).

Once they feel invaded, they feel like they need to defend their community and they do that by harassing and fakeclaiming endos. Then they act like psychology is on their side (it isn't) and after that it's just increasing amounts of digging their heels in.

I think it mostly comes down to the misconception that endos claim to have did without the disorder part, and then in trying to defend themselves they turn off critical thinking and just do whatever they can to get rid of the perceived threat.

*There is a world of difference between the experiences of most endos and most cdd systems but it's not black and white. At this point the term "endo" just means anybody who is not completely traumagenic which includes mixed origin systems. Also, some endogenic systems develop cdds after being exposed to trauma, the only difference is that they were plural beforehand so they're still endogenic. There's others too. The main point is that the plural experience is incredibly personal and doesn't fit well into boxes, categorization is useful and it's important that people understand that in general there are real and big differences between endogenic plurality and cdds but there's no hard lines here.

[mariamlovesyou]

salam. i hope you are holding up ok w everything that is going on. i wanted to ask how you deal w being muslim and gay? i don't know anybody like me so it feels like i am a lonely unicorn. feel alienated by both my own community and the LGBT (i live in the west). i feel angry, lost etc. at both communities and i am often reluctant to practice my religion when i hear homophobic remarks etc. somehow i am too resigned to pray and then that feeling goes away and i go back to worshipping, esp when in crisis. i want to wear hijab as well but i realize that's only a response to my anger at westerners and one of the reasons i do not wear hijab is obv to avoid discrimination (i'm passing) in the professional field & also bc i think no gay woman will like me if i wear it. sorry if this question is too much, you don't have to answer, but if you have any experience or advice to share i would be grateful. thank you ❤️

hi angel .. im sorry for the late reply i had to run to an inspection when i got this i really hope u see it even though i dont know that i can offer much i just want to say im here for u.

i hope u are okay, the world is shaky and scary. im really happy u reached out to me and i think if u take anything from this it’s that reaching out is the first step. i wouldn’t say im at all entrenched in any community or fully at peace w who i am, that’s lifelong work, but it does get easier and sometimes u find little blessings in the people who show up. i feel the exact same way you do rn - alienated, angry, lost, at a crossroads. i often feel there’s no space for me anywhere and many lgbt muslims/religious gays in general feel the same especially when we’re young. i’ve also experienced periods where my faith slipped and i felt too defeated and betrayed to practice my religion fully or even in the smallest most private ways (until a few days ago i had not prayed for months since some very distressing things happened to me) but i always find myself coming back to it bc for me personally islam brings me immense comfort and grounds me, even or maybe especially after long periods of not being a “good muslim”. religion is a deeply personal thing no matter what everyone has told and will keep trying to tell u. the question is does it soothe you? does it bring you peace and comfort? away from everyone else’s eyes, do you feel connected to something higher when you take the time to do these designated rituals? i really think that’s the only thing that matters. and you might not have an answer for that rn or for a long time and that’s ok too, no one has everything figured out. stay away as much as you can from ppl u aren’t forced to be around who try to tell you how to be lgbt how to be muslim how you can’t be both etc. they’re just parroting what they think to be true and they don’t realise how draining it can be for others. protect yourself and listen to yourself. be careful what u share with whom. those r the biggest lessons i’ve learned and the only thing that’s helped make the burden feel lighter is finding other people like you and trust me when i tell u they exist!!! u just have to be a little braver and more intentional in seeking them out, if u can do so safely, bc like you they probably feel that they are alone and there’s no one else who will understand. (and when u find them, hear them out, share a little bit, but remember they are there for a sense of shared community, a delicate connection, not as a strict guide on how YOU need to be; only you decide that and that becomes easier w time)

now depending on where u are it may not be feasible to do so - i spent most of my life as an immigrant in qatar, a very small country w a death penalty or best case scenario deportation “solution” for people like us, where the idea of finding community was not only unthinkable but also seemed straight up ridiculous to me. i never tried looking, i wouldnt encourage doing so if ur in a western country that is similarly rigid unless u know what ur doing and have a support network. in this case all i can recommend is to reach out to organisations that sympathise if there are any, and hang on until ur in a safe space. BUT if there is no such threat to ur daily life, i really really urge u to seek out others like u.. and it’s likely you’ll have to look outside ur immediate circle. at first you won’t know where to look, i didn’t, i tried looking through uni, through apps, through meetups, groups specifically run by lgbt people of colour/marginalised lgbt ppl, and it will take time and a lot of trial and error and at times even ‘desperate’ or embarrassing attempts, at least it did for me. i got lucky by finding friends through friends and then friends of friends of friends etc who were like me and while i definitely wouldn’t say i connected w all of them or even liked all of them or that i have a stable network of other lgbt muslims (most of the ones i met live really far away and meetups are extremely rare but whenever i do talk to them it’s really healing) it really does help to know that somewhere not too far, u have someone who understands. so reach out. it’s hard and gruelling and isolating work but that’s the first and main thing to do to combat these unpleasant feelings of loneliness and anger. i wrestle w very complicated and conflicting things on a daily basis that most of my immediate circle couldn’t even begin to understand, so don’t do the mistake of sitting on it forever.

as for other people, gay women, muslims, whoever, i don’t have much experience here w the latter because im mostly focused on sorting myself out first before trying to fully integrate into like, being w other women in that capacity, and maybe im taking a little longer than i’d like but the good that comes out of this is im a lot less concerned about what other people have to say to me abt my identity. if gay women don’t like me bc of my hijab or my religion i really don’t gaf, they’re obviously not meant for me. don’t cater yourself to anyone but yourself, this goes for both sides. u don’t need to appease the gays by shutting down your religion and u don’t need to appease the muslims by believing u are wrong and an abomination. u were created this way, gay and it seems like u have a sort of tether to ur religion, how is that ur fault or something for u to adjust? the right people will come and the wrong ones will make it obvious (inshallah very quickly). and sometimes in our situation we find ourselves loving and deeply caring for people who just really don’t get it. that’s not ur fault either or something to resent! im starting to enjoy thinking of it as a variety. just do ur best to make sure these ppl are looking out for u and genuinely care for ur well-being even if they don’t really “get” you. and if u have no choice in the matter, hold on to the hope that people who DO get you are coming. islam is the connection between you and allah - that’s it. drown out everything else and don’t let noises distract you from that. i personally wear a hijab because it’s a part of who i am and makes me feel more protected (in a spiritual sense, i am of course very aware now that i live in australia that on a social level it can make me more of a target but i have not been threatened yet to the point of where im forced to remove it. u are not a bad muslim for choosing not to wear it, whatever ur reasoning is).

god gave us a tricky life, one can only theorise why, but what i do know is there are very few people on this earth who will understand u completely, even other lgbt muslims, and even fewer who will have ur best interest at heart. inshallah u find those few sooner rather than later, and remember the point is to let others lighten the load because this is a heavy thing to carry all by yourself. even online ppl in the same position will help. u have me 🧡 i am not experienced or developed enough to offer much more beyond this but i hope you can find some clarity and peace and i hope this helps in even a tiny way. i feel for you

[bethanydelleman]

Asks about my OTPs

Pick your top 10 OTPs without reading the questions, then answer the questions after you've made your list (I will do my top 10 Austen OTPs)

Catherine Morland & Henry Tilney

Fanny Price & Henry Crawford

Elizabeth Bennet & Fitzwilliam Darcy

Harriet Smith & Robert Martin

Caroline Bingley & Sir Walter Elliot

Elinor Dashwood & Edward Ferrars

Marianne Dashwood & Colonel Brandon

Emma Woodhouse & Jane Fairfax

Eleanor Tilney & her laundry Viscount

Sir Walter & Himself

1. Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6? – When Edward comes to Barton and makes fun of Marianne's love of dead trees.

2. Have you ever read a fanfic about 2? – Yes, my favourite is Fanny: A Mansfield Park Story by Amelia Marie Logan, and I've written severa, including one full length novel.

3. Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblr screen saver? – Nope! Always my kids these days.

4. If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be? – This actually happens in FF quite a lot, people are always killing off Brandon early into the marriage and leaving Marianne with a baby. It makes me sad, let Brandon be happy! He's only 37 when they marry he probably has another 20 years at least! (Honestly, since Brandon has survived to his age, Marianne actually has a higher chance of passing away since she's the one making babies).

5. Why is 1 so important? – Because they are so uncomplicated and happy. Just two very cute people making a cute marriage and I would defend their ship to the ends of the earth.

6. Is 9 a funny ship or a serious ship? – Um, it's a whole joke that Austen didn't reveal a new character because the new viscount made a laundry list that Catherine found. But I love Eleanor so much that I do seriously want her to be happy.

7. Out of all the ships listed, which ship has the most chemistry? – Henry & Catherine, Harriet & Robert I think? I may be a bad judge of "chemistry".

8. Out of all your ships listed, which ship has the strongest bond? – Elinor & Edward, I'm always surprised how sure they are of the other's love in spite of of all the obstacles.

9. How many times have you read/watched the 10’s fandom? - I honestly don't know at this point, I read Persuasion once as a teenager and I didn't like it but I LOVED Sir Walter. I've watched all the adaptations (including 1971) and I've read/listened to the book multiple times now.

10. Which ship has lasted the longest? – Sir Walter & himself obviously, that's been going strong for 54 years. I hope it continues until his death at 93. All the others are new pairings.

11. How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up? – The only Austen couple to break up and get back together is Anne & Wentworth, so zero for Elinor & Edward.

12. If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive, 2 or 8? – Huh, Fanny & Henry or Emma & Jane? They both have a sickly member, which is not great for their odds... Emma is smart but often distracted which would be really bad but Jane is a devoted learner.... Henry would "improve" his estate with zombie moats... I'm voting for both Fanny and Emma don't make it and Henry Crawford & Jane Fairfax find their second true pairing together.

13. Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason? – Colonel Brandon is attempting to hide his regard out of respect for Marianne and that's why I love him so much.

14. Is 4 still together? – Yes, eating walnuts and petting "her" little cow. Man they are cute!

15. Is 10 canon? – Yep! Though a bunch of the others aren't

16. If all 10 ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win? – I'm going to put my money on Colonel Brandon, who will do anything to save Marianne. He would be the Katniss and she is the Peeta.

17. Has anybody ever tried to sabotage 5’s ship? – Yes, Mr. Elliot has been trying to prevent Sir Walter from marrying again so he can inherit the baronetcy. He almost succeeds!

18. Which ship would you defend to the death and beyond? –  Catherine Morland and Henry Tilney, they are the only couple I can't bring myself to break up in fan fiction.

19. Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr page? – Um, none? I end up seeing Elizabeth & Darcy stuff no matter what, I have tags on the lesser known Austen characters.

20. If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the ten ships to break up forever or else she’d break them all forever, which ship would you sink? – That is hard because these are my favourite, but I guess Emma can marry boring Knightley instead of having a torrid enemies-to-lovers affair with Jane Fairfax...

I'm not big on chain letters. Thank you @firawren for the tag, if anyone wants to try go ahead!

[disclosed-spire]

"I spent quite a while writing this, so if you'd want to see more of other characters, be sure to let me know!"

I have been gathering up the courage to send this ask, so I am just gonna guess you want the asks to be sent here.

Can you please tell us about your Gourmand headcanons?

Yeah Ofc! I love Gourmand as they're just absolutely great, especially since my pal gourmy is the first campaign of downpour when it was released. I enjoyed their campaign a lot, and had a blast towards the end of their campaign. Seriously, I wish I could get a hug from them because I KNOW they give amazing hugs!

Time for everyone's favorite family oriented orange slugcat! And as everyone knows, this is my own hcs about them and, and definitely some Gourmand spoilers. Please don't be offended at any of this, as these are my own personal beliefs!

If anybody wants to see more of my opinions on the characters, be sure to ask me! I'm welcome to answering questions about my thoughts and HC's, as well as discussing and hearing others POV's!

ANYWAYS! GOURMAND SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!

Design Choices

My design for Gourmand isn't very flashy or anything, but to be honest, I feel it suits them and their personality! It's very close to the original, but has my own little flair and sparkle to it to make our pal Gourmand stand out a bit!

I decided to give them just oranges for a pallet, with their nose being the darkest, which is a dark orange. I usually shift blacks and such for cannon designs to another color of the design but a lot darker to keep the colors overall the same, but just a little easier to look at (in most cases).

I made the tips of Gourmand's limbs, including their tail, dewlap, and ears, a darker orange as I took a bit of inspiration from cat breeds in real life, with my own cat being the main inspiration. This makes Gourmand stand out a bit more, and makes it easier for me to make art of them, as their limbs mark where my own wacky anatomy should be.

Personality

My version of Gourmand has a tough exterior as they need to keep a strong stance towards the hardships of the world around them. Despite this, Gourmand also shows a lot of love, compassion, and sympathy for the world around them at the right moments of course! Gourmand doesn't view the world as only black and white, instead, more of everything being in a morally grey area. Gourmand believes there's a reason for everything, and if possible, they try to go to the more pacifist side of things to keep peace.

Speaking of this, the reason Gourmand is like this is because they believe this deep in their heart, but also because they want to provide their colony with a good example. Gourmand wants to show their colony that while the world is extremely dangerous and that they need to take caution, but also that they can also show compassion even in the scariest of situations.

Other than setting an example, Gourmand loves telling tales of adventures, history, and places they've been, as it always makes others happy, and especially gets the slugpups super excited. Sometimes these stories are made up, but Gormand always lets the listeners know beforehand to clear any misconceptions.

Gourmand is a great parent to all, and generally kind to everyone unless their friends, family, slugpup, or colony is in trouble. While Gourmand is kind, they are a force not to be reckoned with, as they are strong both in personality, and physical strength, and those they care about fuel their determination to continue on.

Powers

Gourmand's powers are a bit of a weird one to me! Being able to create something from your stomach isn't something I've seen before, nor do I have a naturally logical way to explain how this would work (Enot was different as they didn't need to have logic applied to them bc cryptid slugcat), but I'll try my best to explain how this works in a rain world logic sense (hopefully). It's a bit complicated, but here's my best shot!

The best way I could possibly explain slugcat powers is that their body developed some kind of mutation, something with radiation (highly unlikely), or something with being a descendant of a purposed organism/modified slugcat. This is where I believe slugcats get their powers from, as this is the best explanation I have for such unnatural abilities. In Gourmand's case, this happened with their stomach!

My best logic to how Gourmand's stomach creation works is that Gourmand needed to have swallowed the created item in their life at any moment for them to make it in their stomach again. Since Gourmand takes a food pip when they create an item in their stomach, this makes me believe that their body harvests the nutrients to make it, using the information of the dna/material/whatever made the item to re-create it in Gourmand's stomach to pull it out. This explains the randomized effect of what's pulled out of Gourmand's stomach.

As for the crafting mechanic, I wouldn't say that's a power. Gourmand could use their power to help combine items, but for the most part, I feel that it comes from a chemistry standpoint. It's still very useful and important! To me though, I don't think it's a power, even from a rain world logic POV.

Headcannons and Slugcat Colonies

This category is a bit different from the Enot post, and that's because I have my own thoughts about the cannon slugcats!

I personally like to think there's a big distance between Gourmand and Survivor/Monk's timeline placement as this makes the most sense in my head for what I'm gonna say, and it gives Gourmand the "Old and cool legendary ancestor" vibes!

Gourmand in my HC was the one that found the slugcat tree, and started a home there for the whole colony! If it weren't for Gourmand, then Monk and Survivor's campaigns wouldn't have happened. I want to give Gourmand that bc it makes them just the more special in my eyes!

The reason I believe this is because it doesn't make a whole lot of sense for Gourmand to already be there and then start searching for food, and then to get up and leave once food is found. If there's more food in an area, animals tend to stick around, and the slugcats aren't an exception from this. I believe that Gourmand searching was making sure that the area has plenty food, as the colony recently moved and was looking for another temporary home. Another thing to support this is the wall drawings, as I feel the colony would talk about Gourmand through generations.

Another one of my HC's is that Gourmand is the leader of the specific slugcat colony. A lot of people probably think this already, but I'd at least like to give my own take with my own spin on how a Slugcat colony works.

Gourmand is a leader in my eyes because of how useful they are to the colony, and how strong they are. Animals usually prove dominance in size and strength, which Gourmand definitely has (My Gourmand is a big lovable fella)! But since this is also fiction, I added more to this. Slugcats usually choose their leaders based on a few qualities, which are:

Size: Gourmand is big yes, which gives them the upper hand at intimidating possible threats! Slugcats view Gourmand as very important due to this factor, as any predators that would try to harm a slugpup would have to face the intimidation of an angry Gourmand. This is why Gourmand fits here!

Strength: Gourmand DEFINITELY has some big strength to them, bro does 3 damage when not tired! This is viable to a slugcat colony as this shows that they can rely on their leader in even the most difficult of situations. That, and also they are capable of defending the young! Slugcats view this as one of the most important features in a leader, so this is why Gourmand is super important in this category.

Intelligence and Powers: Gourmand definitely checks out here! Their powers and their intelligence combine together, making them VERY useful to the colony. Gourmand can use their powers to help get their colony out of a tight bind, to entertain, and to direct. Slugcats can always count on Gourmand if stuck, which is why Gourmand fits!

Compassion: My Gourmand DEFINITELY fits here! Gourmand is super caring and great with kids, kind to everyone that they can be, uses their powers to help others, uses their intelligence to lead, and does everything in their ability to make sure their colony is safe. Why Gourmand left to look for food is because they wanted to make sure their colony would live and thrive. They'd do anything for their colony, and care for them dearly! This is probably the most important rule of a leader to them, as slugcats are usually social creatures, and rely on companionship to thrive.

If a slugcat leader doesn't fit most of these, and/or possibly abuses their leadership, the colony will choose another leader, and in VERY extreme cases, the leader will be thrown out of the colony (Totally doesn't have something like this with another character).

Relationships

Iterators

Gourmand is overall friendly towards all of the iterators, as Gourmand gets the feeling that the world has been unkind to them, given their situation. Gourmand knows that being stuck inside a box isn't the best, especially if they cannot leave, and can only view the world from small holograms. Gourmand feels bad about their situation, so they come to visit the iterators to help keep them company, and to tell the iterators stories they'd be interested in.

Gourmand does have a lot of respect for them, as they know that the iterators have a lot of power, but have to be careful with their given situation. Gourmand views the iterators as fairly important, and that alone makes one of the reasons Gourmand respect them.

Slugcat Family + Monk and Survivor

Gourmand is their ancestor, so Gourmand is related to them. Despite this, Gourmand has a HUGE amount of respect for the slugcat family. This is because even though they had two kids they lost, they decided to stay strong, and to dive in after their family, which Gourmand finds to be very admirable. Gourmand would do anything to make sure they're safe.

For Monk and Survivor, Gourmand has a huge amount of respect for them both! Gourmand finds it admirable that they stayed strong in a world so dangerous, able to take caution, and able to use the tricks they've passed on through the colony. Despite this, Gourmand also feels sadness for them as they know it was an extremely rough situation on slugcats so young. They'd do anything to make sure that Monk and Survivor don't get separated from their family again.

Nightcat and Inv/Enot

Gourmand is friendly towards them both! Although Gourmand tends to dislike Enot's flirting, they still think of them both as friends. Gourmand does find them a bit mysterious as they both seemed to appear out of nowhere, and with the strangest first interactions as well. As far as Gourmand knows, Enot and Nightcat don't know their parents, and don't have any family nearby. Regardless of this, Gourmand took them both into their colony, and loves talking to them.

Hunter and Artificer

Gourmand is best friends with Artificer and Hunter, and values hunting with them! The three are nearly inseparable, and value each other's company, as well as talking about the colony. Slowly overtime though, Gourmand began to have a crush on the two, and seeing the two in a relationship was nice, but they wanted to confess their feelings to both of them. Eventually Gourmand does, and the three end up in a poly relationship! They're quite happy together :D

Regardless of this, Gourmand has respect for Hunter as they went to save Moon despite them being sickly. Gourmand has since then been finding ways to help Hunter, and with Sig's help, they're lessening the effects that the rot had on Hunters body. Through all this, Gourmand sees Hunter as a fearless and stoic warrior, and loves how kind they can be despite this.

Artificer is a bit of a different story, as Arti had some bad experiences with the colony, and Gourmand doesn't agree with Artificers genocidal ways. Gourmand was a bit on edge of first meeting them, but it grew to fondness as Gourmand realized that Arti is trying to correct their wrongs, and make up for what they've done in the past, with one of those being to apologize to their colony. Upon finding out about Arti's situation, they've grown closer to Artificer, and letting Arti interact with the colony as a way to help heal from the past. Gourmand is a firm believer that Artificer can heal, and they choose to stick by Arti every step of the way.

Spearmaster, Rivulet, and Saint

Gourmand isn't super close to Spearmaster, Rivulet, or Saint, but enjoys their company! Gourmand knows they mean no harm intentionally, but also respects Rivulet and Spearmaster quite a bit for helping the iterators. Saint is a bit more distant, and from what Gourmand knows, Saint has a bit of a complicated past. Gourmand isn't going to push it, but they'll always be there if Saint needs someone to talk to. Gourmand is always welcome to them joining their colony, and is on quite good terms with the three.

[osbob-the-existent]

A bundle of Glimmering Sun things, for your amusement

First, timing. I want the city to be marginally more diversified than just Matoran, so I've elected to set the Sinking as happening during the Time Slip. Quite why it happened I still haven't figured out - the Order of Mata Nui wanted a secret place to keep some Av-Matoran safe, Karzahni had a tantrum and punched a hole in the dome, it's largely irrelevant and I'm mostly planning it for peace of mind. The end result is that the OoMN steps in and requests that the Sunken City be included in the memory wipe for anybody outside of it. They also reduced the timeframe omitted within the city for the sake of avoiding chaos- the overnight appearance of a dome would be terrifying.

Secondly, Kanoka! Each Metru has their own Kanoka in canon, and I think it's only fair that we give the Sunken City the same privilege. So, in no particular order:

Vo-metru: can bounce between targets, in accordance with the user's thoughts. Must impact something to bounce, and the number of ricochets correlates with disk strength

De-metru: can skim along the ground without hitting it. Higher level disks can skim for longer, or skim higher, depending on the shape of the disk.

Ba-metru: can change heights once thrown, according to the user's will. Weaker disks can only go between fixed relative heights, while stronger ones change more fluidly.

Ce-metru: resistant to the effects of other Metrus' disks. At low levels, the effect is very weak; at high levels, it can be enough to briefly nullify an opposing disk's power

Fa-metru: attracts other disks to follow behind it, like a slipstream. Strangely, this is affected by the strength of the opposing disk; weak disks attract strong disks, and vice versa.

Bo-metru: can bend or change shape to navigate obstacles. These disks are unusually light, more closely resembling bamboo than forged protodermis

Fe-metru: imparts more kinetic energy on impact. This uses a portion of the disk's Kanoka power, weakening it; as such, Fe-metru disks are rarely used in mask making

Su-metru: passes through obstacles according to the user's will. Disk strength affects the range and size of object that can be passed through; failing to pass completely through an object can have destructive consequences.

Thirdly, sports! With the increased range of species present, akilini needed a few extra rules, as follows:

No rhotuka, vision powers, or elemental abilities may be used, unless agreed by all players beforehand. If it is agreed, such matches are to be played on the Enclosed Pitch for audience safety.

Weaponry is forbidden on the pitch, with the exception of Kanoka launchers. All other weapons must be removed before play; if they cannot be removed, they must not be used during play

You might not think that these needed clarifying, but you'd be surprised. Supplementing this, a standardised form of disk duelling has become popular, with opponents using level 1 disks and aiming simply to score a clean hit. The city's Skakdi have also made use of the arenas for gladiatorial duels, though this is frowned upon- nobody's died, but there's been significant damage to several important infrastructure projects

And I think that's about it! Some of this was pilfered from an entirely different dream, but most of it was waking mind. If you have any questions, I'm always happy to answer them, so ask away!