#idkidkidk today hasnt been good
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I think the worst part of my job (outside of the constant grueling horrors it has exposed me to on a daily basis) is the knowledge of some of the hard limits some people have with the affection they have for their loved ones and how seemingly fickle those limits can be. Like i understand, that yes, it is good to have boundaries and it is good to put yourself first, and that sometimes people do just the most heinous things imaginable and that you justifiably cannot forgive them for it. But ive also had to see again and again people who will throw a family member away wholesale and callously refuse to help because they deem a 30 minute drive to be too inconvenient to assist them, and it hits so hard sometimes when you get off the phone with someone who refused to take maybe an hour out of their life to help their relative and you look and see that the person is being carged with something inconsequential and nonviolent and its like?? Thats all it took?
#idk this isnt even about one person/thing and i probably didnt word this well and ik im projecting quite a bit of my own family trauma onto#how i perceive other peoples motivations#but sometimes you have to hear someones family member go on and on about how much of an embarrassment this has caused them personally and#how much they viciously hate their child/relative bc of whatever happened#and you look and they had like. a suspended license or something equally unimportant in the grand scheme of things#and it just hits me how conditional some people are with their affection and care#idkidkidk today hasnt been good
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