#idk. I'm tired. but I really do feel so much more interested in reading these old comics than anything DC plopped in my pull box lately
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Just went to uni and instead of doing anything spent 3h agonising about ending my relationship. I'm sure this is good and normal
#it. idk I just don't really wanna be single rn and deal with all of that#and also I have silvester and first new year weekend plans hinging on this person and I kinda really don't want to find something else to do#but by god#I mean maybe my expectations are just too high as to how much I see my partner (doubtful)#or her lifestyle (has a shitton of things going on) and personality (not super communicative) are just not suited for polyamory#(and I have the same problems but I'm not the person who has two partners)#(and the fact that I can't really get a read whatsoever on her other partner is not helpful. like we vibe on occasion but mostly#I just do not get him at all)#but idk. like. we see each other like twice a week and those are like. during dance and for a pubquiz#and maybe going to the library#and it's just like to my expectations we are barely doing the bare minimum I need to have my emotional needs met#so whenever something falls through I am immediately devastated#but again I feel like 'I would like to see you outside of a social engagement with our friends at least once a week#and additionally also would like to sleep in the same bed as you at least once a week' are not high expectations whatsoever#and yet ....#when did we last have sex? Oh idk in october? maybe? I don't remember#which is that super important to me in a relationship? no. but like I don't think it's bc neither of us is interested#it's bc since then we have not managed to sleep in the same bed while neither of us was either on their period or extremely tired#and idk maybe I should write this to them instead of like. venting on tumblr. like this is also very much on me#but like#idk maybe it just also is a sign that maybe I don't care so much about this relationship. but also I feel like I still care more than her.#which isn't great#idk advice?#it's just. this current situation has me regularly having several hour breakdowns bc shit's not working out once again.#and that situation I really don't like
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I miss 1987 comics. It felt like things had substance over production value.
#it's one of those things like. objectively certain things are better in regards to race gender sexuality and politics#but there's something so. clean and polished and deliberately focus-grouped about modern comics#not always (talking about big two not indie - indie can still get delightfully messy)#but idk. there's a heart to (certain) old comics that I miss#I miss 1990s Gotham and early 2000s Metropolis#I miss Diana who had nothing to do with Zeus and who had a job as a diplomat#I miss worlds where characters can have tension and be bitches to each other for petty reasons#idk. I'm tired. but I really do feel so much more interested in reading these old comics than anything DC plopped in my pull box lately#steph speaks#steph reads comics
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man. getting a little sick of being everyones 15th option for everything. when is it my turn to be someone's first choice :^[
#or even second tbh I'll take it#i had a couple old friends from college msg me recently to tell me what theyve been up to#which is sweet and i care abt them n wanna hear it! but they dont ask after me or show any interest in how I'm doing#and it makes me feel like I'm just their journal or smth. a brick wall they happen to be standing near#don't get me wrong I love to be useful. but when ppl only ever interact w u bc they need smth from u. well.#rly not doing anything good for this complex im developing where my self worth is directly tied to my usefulness to other ppl lmfao#i dont want to be ppls fucking dog!! or not any more than i already am but whatever thats all im good for i guess!!#and i desperately want someone to be my fave person rn bc all my energy is going nowhere + im at my best when im at my most devoted#so ppl treating me like this rn is just making me incredibly vulnerable to being taken advantage of.#like yeah i am eager to please and ill follow anyone around and do whatever for a crumb of attention but maybe#if you're actually my friend u shouldnt be encouraging that behaviour. even if it makes u feel good like cmon thats not so cool man#or if you ARE going to encourage it then maybe u should acknowledge the power dynamic ur creating + try not to abuse it. idk 🤷♂️#urgh idk maybe im just saying words rn im very tired#I just feel like all the friendships etc I have atm are slipping into that dangerously unbalanced zone + becoming v one way#and I don't know what I'm doing wrong I'm trying the best I can and I guess its just not enough for anyone and that really really sucks#I'm doing better mentally rn but I dont currently have a support system + there are a lot of destabilising forces in my life#so im just. worried abt the direction things could take if I lose this foothold I've dragged myself onto yknow.#and I wouldnt have to be so worried abt that all of the time if I just had someone literally anyone I could rely on or even trust#but oh well. it is what it is. doing all I can to take care of myself so hopefully it won't come to that anyway.#sorry for rambling on so much if u read this far I'm giving u a kiss on the cheek don't worry abt me honey I've got this#anywayy goodnight#.vent#.diaries
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Yay more Joost!
Could I request Joost x Slightly older reader pls? Like only 2-4 years older and they do make jokes about it with their friends but reader gets a little insecure about it sometimes?
Alternatively maybe just some headcanons?
Hey, it's my first request, thank you so much! <3 I really had fun with writing it, maybe because I'm actually older than Joost so I can relate... Idk if it's exactly what you wanted to read, but I hope you'll like it!
The loud, electronic music filled the whole bar. The place was packed with noisy people dancing or drinking their drinks. You, Joost and your friends were sitting in a booth, chatting and sipping the drinks. You had fun in the beginning while you danced with Joost, but then you got tired so you sat down to rest. That moment was already getting late and you would rather be at home, cuddling under the warm blanket and watching comfort shows. You were slightly older than Joost, turned thirty some time ago. You often joked about that, but deep down you had a lot of insecurities. You noticed that your body and your mind was changing with the passing time and you couldn’t help it.
“Can we go home?” You leaned towards Joost and asked him a question.
“Already?,” he asked back and you could see a disappointment in his eyes. You knew he would like to stay and party a little bit longer, but you felt completely exhausted.
“No, stay longer!,” your friends also demanded.
“You know what’s like…The age is just a number, unless you’re thirty and you start feeling those hangovers,” you joked and everyone laughed.
“Aww, it won’t be so bad, I’ll cure your hangover quickly with a good breakfast,” Joost assured.
“You know that I eat ibuprofen for breakfast, right?,” you joked again.
Your friends bursted into laughter one more time. You and Joost exchanged meaningful looks and he got a hint.
“Okay, let’s go.” Joost took your hand.
Once you said goodbye to your friends, you went out of the bar onto a dark, quiet street. You lived not so far away from that bar, so you both decided to take a short walk. You walked in silence, your arms wrapped around each other’s waists. Suddenly, Joost stopped and turned to you.
“Hey, what’s wrong, schat?,” he inquired with a care in his voice.
“Nothing.” You looked away, pouting.
“Hey, you can tell me anything.” Joost cupped your face.
“Umm, it’s that…The age difference between us. We joke about that, but I know that some people behind our backs disapproves that you’re dating an older person,” you explained.
“Fuck those people,” Joost smiled. “Wine gets better with time and so do you. I’m happy that I can get older with you.” Joost wrapped his arm around your shoulders and kissed your forehead.
You slightly casted a smile at him.
“It’s not only that…For example, tonight I saw you wanted to stay a little bit longer at the bar. I’m so sorry we had to leave because of me…”
“No problem, we can spend time at home in an interesting way, too.” Joost smirked. “My dirty thirty,” he added, whispering in a low voice in your ear.
#joost#joost klein#joost x reader#joost fanfic#older reader#gender neutral reader#fluff#comfort#requested
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can you do a continuation of full power Lumine with Fyodor, Sigma, and Ranpo. I feel like Fyodor would interested because of how complicated she is and how he would have a hard time understanding something for the for the first time I’m assuming. Same goes for Ranpo. I think he would be exiting too because the traveler is always willing to help and his type is someone that spoils him. For Sigma I feel like he would understand her in a way because he is a supernatural being that came into existence under interesting circumstances. And he would have someone to help him because we all know how the Decay Of Angels is I would also feel unsafe 24/7 😭
feel free to take your time if you have a lot of requests! (this was longer than I anticipated)
Fyodor, Sigma & Ranpo x Lumine! Reader
Hi! ♡ I'm quickly zooming through requests to make up for the time lost in my absence lol. Lumine is skeptical but shares the same curiosity her twin has for everything, she's rational and courageous, along with being generous and helpful towards others that need assistance. And most especially, rather beautiful and somewhat quiet, yet considered rather expressive.
As if a primordial being – Lumine holds power able to destroy worlds and travel through them with ease, and yet, most of it having been sealed away by the Unknown God's own bidding. What happens when she regains her full power and travels through the world of BSD?
Soukoku, Jouno & Atsushi Ver.
FYODOR DOSTOYEVSKY:
You're a strange new specimen, and he actually finds interest in you. Plus – Fyodor actually likes pretty people, so seeing you for the first time is actually surprising.
Who knew someone so beautiful in this world existed 🗿
But honestly, although this man can read you like book if he wanted to, that's not happening.
You're rather complicated. Like no fr. You're pretty and small as hell, but you're so fucking strong hello? And you're not very talkative yet so expressionable it's alluring
He has no idea what to think, but all he knows is that he wants to keep you around.
The fact you're helpful draws him to you more. He learns to trust you overtime, and you have no ulterior motives when you go warm him up and make him feel comfortable.
Whenever he needs help or basically just you spoiling him and comforting from his anemia, that's cloud 9 ok idfc
He's starting to really ... really like you and I don't
You're basically everything he'd want tbh. Since you're from a different world, his ability probably don't work on you.
And just be glad it doesn't honestly. You're like God level strong and rather smart yourself, so he isn't bored and actually finds you worthy of being with him.
Well even if you weren't, you'd be an interesting playtoy on it's own. Please let me punch him already.
He'll have you run errands and do different things to go according to his plans, but he doesn't tire you out or anything because he still pretty much cares.
BRO this guy reminds me of the Fatui idk 💀
Dude is fuckin unhinged, commits warcrimes, hot and is very strong. You can't tell me he's literally the emobidiment of the harbingers in an alternate world lmfao
Even though he's a red flag you don't really care 'cause you can kill him whenever you want. Slayyy girlboss.
One of the rare times he'd take his ushanka off, and put it on your head because you're just too adorable to resist. The innocent, curious look on your face afterwards sends him.
You're a cute, complicated being he's just addicted to.
He's rather amused himself – so whenever you're like beating up Dazai or something (much to his satisfaction), he's watching in the back with his popcorn or sumn.
Probably smirking the entire time. He loves you more now
Imagine Dazai being Childe and that weekly boss you always fucking destroy every week? Peak comedy.
He probably won't even bother trying to fight against you, man knows his place so he gets humbled. But that probably won't stop him from testing you a few times.
He'll purposely get you in a tricky situation so he can observe more of you, and you'll never fail to surpass his expectations every time.
P.S. expect yourself to beat up Nikolai often. His orders lol
Rat king's actually found his match <3 fuck you
RANPO EDOGAWA:
You probably crash landed in the agency or smth. How would I know that?
I'm the writer, bitch /hjq
Now let's say both of you were just acquaintances at first, you'd help around the agency a lot though. And that also includes him.
So here we are! At this point, you're basically just spoiling him from all the help that you give.
He doesn't even mind he fucking loves it I bet
Other than Atsushi, he now drags you with him to go and buy candy, or just makes you go out and do it yourself. Either way the candy is bought so 🤷🏻
Dw babe he shares it with you <3
Must I say you're pretty once more? It's not even annoying bro I am SPEAKING FACTS stan lumine
Ranpo is very interested in you and your specie, if he ever got bored he'd probably take breaks away from doing some cases and listens to your talking.
Will get extremely invested in the world of Teyvat, learning more about it.
DON'T TELL HIM ABOUT HEIZOU
"Hehe! Number one detective you say? Even more so than I am~? After all, I am the greatest detective in the world!"
We get it babe.
Like if you ever honestly tried to put them both together in Poe's book it is very obvious who will come out first. Bro will legit rub it in your face too, not even cap
Oh, speaking of which – he'd probably invite you into one of them too. It would be a fun hangout ... maybe.
You're the bodyguard that fucks up any murderer tryna get to him while he deals with the shit and puts his glasses on then DAMN BITCH we boutta go usain bolt on this shit.
It doesn't even take that long. You guys did it in a heartbeat.
Ranpo honestly adores you, that much you can tell. He likes mostly everything about you and finds you so entertaining.
Especially your expressions which are peak comedy.
Definitely the type to do something real smart and show off his skills so he could see your reaction.
And maybe even get a bit of praise. You know this guy loves it when you compliment him and agree with things that he says. That's already fulfilling his heart.
I'd say you'd help him out a lot honestly, the ADA is basically the adventurers guild 💀
You'd be relaxing and having a chill time until Ranpo or some other member comes up and tells you to fucking beat up Mori or something
Yeah. They entrust it all to your capable hands.
But of course, Ranpo wouldn't leave you alone with that. You both make great teamwork in all cases.
Right after each remotely easy to borderline difficult case, Ranpo will be a sweetheart and take you out somewhere nice to relax. His treat.
kisses in the ferris wheel pls
It's already easy enough to tell, but you can see all the affection in his eyes as the night comes to an end once more. More than that, even.
It's such a cute sight. But honestly, who could even say no to this guy? It's literally Ranpo.
SIGMA:
So here you've already been in the world of bsd for a while and you're just doing random bullshit the agency adventurers guild gives you.
Mersault arc timeskip. Dazai off sucking and teaming up with some Nakahara toes, Nikolai being a material gworl
Fyodor is mimicking Odasaku's ashes
And obviously you're here in the back forced to do everything yourself because shit goes down 🔥
You have a pretty good knowledge on yourself in this world you're stuck in again, and it's necessary to use that info to your disposal because wow, the situation is complicated.
Especially during this arc now, but it's less difficult when you're only focusing on the DOA.
We'll say you only be familiar with the different organizations because you often go around a lot and travel.
Then meet various people and ... fight over half of them 😐
By this time, you and Sigma have been well acquainted. Due to his ability, he managed to get info about you easily. And boy does he use that to advantage.
Asked begged you to help him out in the DOA.
Look man he's suffering, don't leave babygworl all alone with all these gay men who're too broke to afford proper therapy sessions
Don't worry Sigma, we're here for you <3
By now you had no idea what was happening, just getting random info from everyone around you
Moving place to place (teleport waypoints are real handy right about now), collecting random shit and beating up enemies along the way
Classic genshin ripoff moment :/
Although you don't actually do a lot of stuff for the DOA, it's mostly personal mishaps coming from Sigma. Because no we don't want to be a wanted terrorist tf
So you soon arrived at mersault and saw poor Sigma either dead or unconscious.
Bro is in need of tevyat fried eggs
Anyways, you of course could not LEAVE him out of your sight after that. The one time you thought it was okay to stay out of business ... that happened 🤡
Sigma was indeed alive, but at the same time it wasn't okay to leave him since he was barely clinging on.
By the time he awoke, he thought he saw heaven. He frantically sits up from bed.
Oh wait, it was just you <3
You brought him back to the sky casino, as he was resting at a safe distance away from the three psychopaths in jail
You guys do end up having to go back much to his dismay, although this time it felt more safer because you were around. He's down deep and he can't return.
Sigma really likes you. Not because you're helpful and quite beautiful, but strong and empathetic in a sense both of you relate to various things.
He's seriously lucky to have you, his little shooting star ❤️
#bsd x reader#bungou stray dogs#armed detective agency#bsd#bsd headcanons#decay of angels#genshin#lumine#genshin crossover#bsd crossover#sigma x reader#bsd ranpo#fyodor dostoevsky#fyodor x reader
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Okay so like here are some sukuna hcs :3
I'm drooling over this mf too much and I'm bored asf, so have fun and read to your hearts content!!
POV: Sukuna hates your ass, but he found you interesting and kept you around, and now he's basically an iPad kid, and your the iPad. (It's late idk why this is funny)
SFW
- Calls you cute pet names instead or your actual name since he met you!
Dumb female, woman, worthless trash, trashy female, maggot (how lovely!!)
To..
(Wretchedly adorable disgustingly beautiful woman/j, little bunny, brat, my weakling)
Not really into cute cheesy stuff so he either keeps it mean or simple, maybe sometimes cute.
- when he met you, you either had to have some good stories to tell him or an interesting personality, or else he probably would've ignored u or killed you tbh.
- he doesn't like to admit it, but he loves to listen to you talk, and converse with you when he's bored.
- whether you know how to cook or not, he doesn't care that much.. (he has uruame or wtv) but if u do know how then that's a wonderful bonus!
- he'd play board games with you, or any kind of games if he was really bored.. (also wanted something to be good at and beat you with) if he looses he'll probably just fight you one on one to remind you who's better in general
- when he goes out destroying villages and killing people, he brings you back expensive souvenirs before leaving. Once he saw a woman with beautiful clothing, he thought it would look good on you, so after he killed everyone he took it and gifted it to you! :3
- doesn't care so much about the dating stuff, if he has you around so much then your already his, so why put a status on it?
- I don't think he would marry.. but if he ended up being madly in love with you or had some sort of admiration towards you, he would just get a ring and put it on you, say your mine/my queen forever and be done with it
- he actually secretly loves when you want to cuddle him from time to time.. he likes your warmth while he puts his huge 4 arms around you and cradle you
- jealous? Sure, possessive? Definitely, this guy will not tolerate other men getting close to you. If they talk with you, he'll be pissed sure, but he knows you won't actually get to close, but touch you? Flirt? Yeah, they're dead.
- loves squeezing your thighs/belly, anything he can get his hands on, not even sexually sometimes, he just wants to feel you (calms him down sometimes)
- when you annoy him too much, he rolls his eyes and flicks your head or arm playfully, then tells you to leave him alone for now. If you get sad about it he'll probably get more mad and just pull you into his arms and squeeze you, "whatever, sorry you sensitive weakling.." kisses you and let's u annoy him for a bit longer
- loves to eat, whenever he's hungry he likes to eat and talk with you sometimes, mostly listen to you talk. He stuffs your mouth with some cow meat or something because he thinks your face looks cute stuffed. If your a vegetarian, he'd probably roll his eyes once you told him and tell you how you would not like meat. (Shows up with a whole farm worth of fruits and veggies to get uruame to make a custom meal for you)
NSFW
-when yall fuckin, he definitely degrades and groans real loud tbh.
- names like, slut, my little cumdump, whore, and all those nasty names come up
-he def has a breeding kink
- loves to mark you, biting everywhere he can, scratching, just to wake up the next morning and see you covered with his love marks is so satisfying to him
- when you get too tired, he stops after a bit and lays down beside you for you to sleep in his arms, if he's still not satisfied he'd probably be pissed but it's alr there's always tomorrow
- he's big, hella girthy too I must say
- he loves missionary or mating press the most, the look on ur face makes him feel even more powerful and when you ride him it's even better seeing you struggle to take him
- spanking goes crazy tbh, loves hearing your yelps and whines when he spanks too hard
- he's so good at eating you out, like seriously, way too good. He doesn't even bother looking up at you most times, too focused on your taste and sounds you make when he gets too rough on eating that shi out 💯
Alr I'm too tired for more but if you have any characters u want me to do go ahead and comment em!! Sorry if this was bad I was half passed out but I'll do better trust, goodnight!
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IDK if this counts as a Hagstone ask, but what is Hagstone? Could you give me the rundown? Or do you have a post where you explain the basics already?
Yes!!! It definitely counts!!! Let me tell you about my OCs and their story!
Hagstone is a story that I've been working on with @browniefox on and off for about seven years now! We've made at least one or two complete drafts of the first book, and I'm currently going through and rewriting the first book for (hopefully) the last time! and then it will be done! Hagstone is intended to be a duology, so just two books long.
enjoy this seven year old art when I was first developing the characters! The tag is Hagstone, but to find ALL the art I've ever done on it check the tag wtgp - it had the temporary title of 'Way to go Paul' for like... four or five years, referencing a Vine which I can't remember why we did that haha. There aren't any characters named Paul in it.
The story is about Kyle - a recent college dropout - who has to find new housing after an Event at his old place. He moves in with the eclectic Eldan - and over the course of the book gains new housemates (none of who are actually human) and discovers a dark danger lurking under the town.
(are by @browniefox) The story itself focuses on themes of struggling to let go of the past and face the future, dealing with grief, depression, and combatting loneliness.
One of the reasons I wrote this story was that I was really tired of stories that constantly have a 'normal' character who later realizes they're Secretly half witch or a fea or whatever so a big part of the story is the fact that Kyle is a very Human person with no magical abilities and how he interacts with the magical world.
The main characters are Kyle (of course) an anxious, depressed, and self conscious guy with a special interest in bugs and anger issues.
Eldan - the oldest living Fae who always seems to know more than everyone else and has been reportedly 'in a funk' (didn't leave his house) for many decades leading up to the story.
Marion - An acerbic vampire only a century or two old with trust issues and a secret soft side. He has been ostracized by the local vampire covens for reasons not yet known.
Ollie (Oleander) - Hailing from a family of monster hunters, Ollie is a sweet boy who can transform into a giant beast. His family are technically a line of Gargoyles but many centuries ago Eldan blessed them, hence the furriness of the transformation and the lack of being made of stone. However, something has happened recently causing him to go to Eldan on behalf of his family for help.
and Jonah! - Jonah is the ghost that haunts the house with few memories of his time alive whose death is connected to the darkness that lurks under the town.
(if you look you can see that Jonah and Ollie were recently renamed. Ollie was originally Leander but that read and wrote too similarly to the name 'Eldan', so we changed his name to Oleander and have him go by 'Ollie'. But THEN that was too close to the name Odon, so we changed Odons' name to Jonah. I'm much happier with these names and I think they are now distinct enough from one another, but it may be confusing if you're looking at old stuff)
That's the basic so please feel free to ask questions about the story, the characters, or if you want to meet some of the side characters in the story!
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Boys Be Brave [EP.4] // Translation notes
Not so many this time so let me know if you're curious about anything else, I'll point out what I thought was interesting^^
"If you like someone, you start to feel ashamed/embarrassed. I'd rather die than to show him how embarrassing I am."
This interestingly ties to my previous post! Where I mentioned that Balgeum said the same word in another phrase: "Don't follow me around like a clueless fool. It's fucking embarrassing".
He didn't use any other specific words so I noted how vague it was, and I wonder if he was trying to tell Inho he was shameful for clinging to him but that's actually a word he found to describe his own feelings towards Inho. It doesn't matter whether Balgeum spends his entire life in poverty, debts and hustling as he said he's used to it, but he's ashamed of being with someone, even loving someone while he's so pitiful in his own eyes. A hole in his sock, family in financial ruins, he just doesn't dare to see a carefree happiness for himself, and he punishes and curses himself out for even having hope.
What is also interesting – I'm not sure whether other character names really have meanings or wordplays, but 밝�� means "brightness". Which also feel like a bit of a cruel joke to be named like that and live such tiring and grey life.
I was so confused with the subs here. I can guess what they tried to go for, but Kiseob literally says '아쉬었어', "I feel a bit bad about yesterday =)" It's a word that can be translated to "It's such a shame that... (something happened)", "It's too bad that... (I didn't achieve something)", like you can say it when you tried to buy a ticket but they were all sold out instantly. Or you missed some opportunity and regret it now.
We know Kiseob was talking about something else (I think he wanted to say it's too bad that he and Jinwoo couldn't enjoy making out for longer or something) but it's no wonder Jinwoo got so offended by this, because he thought Kiseob meant he regretted that he even kissed Jinwoo yesterday because the kiss was too bad. Does this sentence even make sense?xD
And that's why he started riling himself up and freaking out that it was all because of his kissing skills.
That's Kiseob's confusion right there after seeing that Jinwoo fled the scene after his comment. He didn't actually call himself a pervert of anything but he wondered what was wrong with his words, were they too much for Jinwoo to run away. I do believe he meant that it was too bad that nothing much happened after that kiss yesterday instead xD
So he apologized via message that it might've been too much and he will be careful from now on. Jinwoo, of course, read that completely differently again. And then Jinwoo angrily tells him not to be so arrogant after just that first kiss (he's not good but he'll be with practice, and Kiseob should not be the judge!). Meanwhile (I think) Kiseob is confused and focuses on the word 'the first kiss', so to him, that might sound like a promise of more to come, therefore he just sends 'okay'? But he also says they didn't really get to talk about their kiss later. I might be confused with the last msg too x)
Miscommunication, BL's beloved.
(if you're curious about the heart and emoji message, it was from the last time, Kiseob sent "I want to give you something as a last gift... can you come out?". And idk why, the message before that says 'Refridgerator', probably also something from 1-2 episodes xD)
"Who are you to evaluate me?" The boy really thinks Kiseob is the alpha expert on love, daring and romance, and he misjudges him himself huh xD
"By the way, you become weak-hearted if someone is hurt". My interpretation of this line – Kiseob talks about how Jinwoo cares about him and his wound anyway, despite all his defenses and rejections. Jinwoo, of course, denies and says it's because Kiseob will be a nuisance when he' gets's hurt.
Just a little nuance – Kiseob asks Jinwoo about everything, he doesn't say it in a mocking factual way at all. "Your schedule is disrupted because you like me, right? And you did that (kissed me) yesterday because you like me, right? Why do you like me?"
He is constantly asking because he doesn't know the difference. He is trying to understand himself through Jinwoo's feelings, so he asks. Asks why people like, how do they like, how does that feeling manifest in real life – because he doesn't know anything, even if he likes Jinwoo, he doesn't know why, he doesn't really realize it himself. He doesn't know why he kissed. He dated but he never experienced the feeling of love. He can't give Jinwoo any honest answers yet. Well, he's honest that he's not sure about anything, but it's not the answer planning-and-unambiguous Jinwoo wants to hear.
Can I just step out of BL show for a lil bit and say that I really liked them?! I think they were adorable together. Too bad polar opposites attracts and Jinwoo needs Kiseob and not the certain copy of himself (who also isn't the prim and perfect as she shows herself).
Anyway! There is one point in Jinwoo's perfect-ideal-type checklist which says 'To have J in the name like in 'JIN-woo''. 진 (jin) can also come from 'truth' so he invented that symbolic connection/condition for a partner. Which is also why Kiseob in the previous episode wanted to change his name to the one that includes J as well, but he choose the name 'Jongji' which had a ridiculous meaning of 'stop'. Again, technically correct but absolutely far from what Jinwoo actually wanted.
Isn't it interesting that, even though he went on a day with his Ideal Type, Jinwoo still enjoyed not the library date or the meaningful messages, but the game arcade time? The one that's supposed to be meaningless and not productive and with the purpose of just having fun? And he kept being distracted by the illusions/thoughts of Kiseob?:D Yeeeah... Maybe your perfect type checklist needs some revisions, Jinwoo.
About the side couple – I was right! They will go to three dates because Balgeum gave in. He even will sacrifice his never-ending-worktime for that. Hehe. He also says 'I have to become rich' with determination which in my mind, connecting to his 'I'd rather die than look so embarrassing to Inho' means that he now has a new goal. To... I guess, work even HARDER to be able to have a chance dating Inho. Will they even work out right now? No one knows, but it's obvious they both are willing to give it a second chance.
And the last bit – it's pretty obvious, but Hyejin actually shouts 'You fucking bastard!!!', which is so hilarious.
#boys be brave#boys be brave comments#kbl#korean bl#dropthemeta#dropthemeta kbl#learning languages#korean language#translation notes#language details#lost in translation#jinwoo x kiseob#inho x balgeum
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ok and now some thoughts about my early experience of parenting.
it kinda rocks... i really like it. i will definitely have a second kid if finances and biology work out. my life is so much better with this little guy in it. the sacrifices so far are mostly minor and are much more logistical than personal. i have to work more hours than i'd ideally want to because there's only one paycheck. i have to try to cobble together more sleep than i used to because i am pretty tired at the end of the day. i can't go to the gym or run an errand or go write at a coffeeshop for a few hours without hiring a sitter or asking my friends to help out. but the tradeoff is i get to be this little kid's mom. he thinks i'm pretty funny and he's interested in everything i do and he calls to me to get me to come over to his mat and talk to him and he likes to grab my face and hold it still so he can study it real intently and when he's upset he wants me to snuggle him until he feels better. i would pick that over getting to run into a store without the stroller a million times over.
i remember reading this book years ago where someone (paulo freire? someone influenced by freire's pedagogy?) recommended that all teachers, no matter how long they'd been teaching, carve out time every six months to reflect on their teaching practices and consider whether those practices were aligned with their core/guiding values as educators. i obviously love this idea because i was born to engage in sustained reflective journaling about my values lol. but also: i do think there's value in setting aside time at regular intervals to check in with yourself about the way you are living, or about whatever you are practicing, whether it's teaching or your work with others or, in this case, parenting. so idk i might try using his birthday and half birthday as time to journal both about my kid and about my own practice of parenting.
do i have a practice of parenting?? that sounds too fancy for someone who is only six months in lol. but i do enjoy thinking about what i'm doing and i like trying to connect the day-to-day choices i'm making to larger principles. i have written about this before but idk i think i am somebody who derives a strong sense of security and groundedness from having a loose framework of guiding values i can refer to when making decisions. and i guess in this first round of reflective journaling i will try to articulate what some of those emerging values/principles are. here we go:
I am making a conscious effort to not sweat the small stuff. there are one million things you can be worried or stressed about in parenting. and there are one million ways you can fall into the trap of thinking that if you just control every single variable nothing bad will happen to your kid. i am trying, inasmuch as i can, to avoid at least a few ways of falling into that trap. i have worked really hard to choose flexibility instead of rigidity when it comes to, for instance, letting other people care for my kid. it's okay if people do things differently than i would - as long as he's safe, he can only benefit from being exposed to different caretaking styles and adapting to different people's ways of engaging with him. i also made a decision early on to not engage with any parenting content on social media (this means ignoring the dozens of insta reels my mom sends me every week lol) and that has been really healthy/good for me. there is TOO MUCH information out there. it is way too overwhelming. you could spend your whole life worrying and i want to spend my life doing other things, like funny accents and comedy bits for the baby.
i am working hard to not interpret other people's parenting choices as a judgment of my own. i really believe that there are lots of different ways to raise healthy, well-adjusted kids. we can make different choices (small and big choices!) and still arrive at the same outcomes. i just really don't want to be the kind of person who takes it personally when people do something differently than i would've! i want to be secure enough in my choices to be able to accept and appreciate a whole range of other parenting styles. i also want to be humble enough to realize that i don't have it all figured out and might learn something from reflecting on someone else's parenting choices. anyway this has been a challenging one as i sometimes DO feel quite judged or shamed by other people's choices. but i also think it's ok to feel that reaction as long as i can keep making space for myself to take a deep breath and think through why i feel like that. idk! work in progress but i've only had six months of practice lol.
i am also trying not to interpret other people's anxieties as anything other than them working through their own stuff. to give one example: i love my mom so much but she is just, like, vibrating out of her skin with anxiety at all times about literally everything. and she has really found an outlet for that anxiety in grandparenting. i get dozens of texts a week about what exercises i should be doing with him and what experiences i should be making sure he has and where i should be taking him and what i should be saying to him and what i should be asking the doctor about and so on and so forth. this obviously could be pretty stressful, and i know that my brother and SIL find it so stressful that it is kind of negatively impacting their relationship with her. but idk i feel like with my mom i spent a lot of my life taking her anxieties personally, thinking that she thought i was incompetent/incapable/irresponsible/whatever. and then at some point in the last few years i was just like oh... this isn't about me at all, is it? this has absolutely nothing to do with me. this is just her fear and her terror of doing things wrong and her overwhelming need to avoid shame, and all of that emotional stuff just happens to be playing out in this relationship because we are close enough that she can lets her emotional walls down and let me see the churning river of anxiety that runs through the heart of her life. i wish that she didn't feel like that. but it's also not something i can fix or change. the only thing that is within my control is the choice not to take it personally, which in turn helps me put some guardrails around it so that it doesn't impact our relationship. idk i think this will probably be an ongoing thing i have to sort through for myself. but also she is who she is and i love her and it is important to me that she be a big part of owen's life. so we will figure it out.
I refuse to optimize my parenting because i refuse to see my child as a thing that needs to be optimized. this is in some ways hard for me because in many respects i am all-in on the very american philosophy that everything can be improved endlessly, including yourself and your family, if you just work harder and care more and give endlessly of yourself to the work. but nope! nope. not for parenting. not for my kid. i want him to have experiences and be exposed to new things, but not so he can "get ahead" or excel in things. i want him to be curious, engaged, interested, flexible, alive to the world, open to new things. i do not care if he is bilingual by age four or has a STEM curriculum at his daycare or goes to a top college or whatever. and i want the choices i make about what we do together and how we spend our time to reflect that. idk he's still so little that this is not super relevant yet but i can feel some of it creeping in.
lastly: i am trying to approach all aspects of parenting with the fundamental belief that i am and will be a good parent. i feel like our culture wants women in particular to spend all their time feeling guilty and inadequate as mothers. we also don't get a lot of external feedback on whether or not we're doing a good job as parents, which i think can make us frantic for validation and riddled with self-doubt over whether we are doing Enough. but i want to just like, try to cut some of that out and just answer it for myself. i'm doing a great job. i'm a great mom. i love my kid and my kid loves me. as i learn more about my child and myself as a parent i will undoubtedly adjust my approach to parenting many times, but making adjustments doesn't mean i was doing something "wrong" or "bad" before. it just means i want to try something new or shift gears a little bit. idk maybe this sounds dumb but i actually think it is proving kind of powerful so far as a strategy for managing parenting anxiety. i just assume that my parenting instincts are reasonably good and will guide me to make reasonably good choices, and if something turns out not to work, i assume i am a good enough parent to figure it out and adapt accordingly.
ok!! good journaling session and now it's time for bed!!
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𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐓𝐔𝐒
Hi, so I'm going on an indefinite hiatus. This is a impromptu decision, so I don't know if I'll come back in like a day and correct myself. But I've been debating on this decision for a long time, so yea.
[ below the undercut you'll find some of my reasons for this decision, and etc, I'd be grateful if you take your time reading it. ]
I don't feel comfortable as 'Cupid', I guess it's because 'Cupid' was never supposed to be my persona, she was just an oc who's running this blog, and it was supposed to be fun, mini lore bits, or whatever, and I thought the idea was really cool back then. . up until people started calling me Cupid.
I guess overtime, I never made a serious effort to correct it, so like it just became me? But like as shit went on and on and on . . It felt weird, I guess a sort of imposter syndrome or like identity crises started forming? I . . didn't feel like myself, I guess I felt like whatever 'Cupid' was.
And as months passed with this sort of identity crises, I started questioning my personality, my interests, if my friends here truly liked me, or if I was more open or idk myself? If they'd still like me? I'm not a chronically online person, in fact I've realized pretty recently that I hate staying in one place, I love the outdoors, and if I could I'd socialize more, but I also overthink and get embarrassed easily. I don't like being on my pc 24/7, yes it's something I still do, but I feel terrible after doing so.
I actually picked up certain interests I've had in the passed again, and I've felt more like myself. I don't know, I think I've realized that my relationship with this blog has been unhealthy, it's always been unhealthy, and my identity crises was the least extreme problem I've had due to this blog.
Actually, the game, the controversies, the fights, everything I've experienced on this blog, has left lasting physical damage on my body, I can't handle anxiety, I can't handle stress, and it's because the moment I get anxiety, stressed, or begin to overthink, I get immensely nauseas, I'm stuck in the bathroom, and if I don't throw up it feels worse, I can't eat, I'm unproductive for hours if one things ticks off my anxiety. I feel unlike myself, and the thing is, I can't fix it, it's just how I'm now. I have pills I have to take for this itself, and honestly they've not been 100% helpful.
Alongside abundance of other problems, mental breakdowns, and so much more shit, this blog has truly done nothing but make everything so much worse for me. If I had one good day or week with this blog and the people around me, I can expect a month of bad in return, and there comes a point where I genuinely cannot fake confidence out of it.
I genuinely think I need to dissociate from 'Cupid', she's not me, I'm not her. As I'm typing this, I genuinely wonder, what am I truly? Up until now my identity, was what I formed through 'Cupid', and honestly I don't even know where I'm going with this, I genuinely am just . . done. I'm tired. I've tried, I have not succeeded in overcoming any problems this blog has caused me.
I think a part of me is so attached to this blog, because of 'Cupid' and of course because it helped me out of my depressive pit, but as these last few weeks pass, and I edge closer to my final year before university, I feel myself returning to that depressive pit, worse than ever . . so at that point, I can't help but ask myself, what was the point of me staying on this blog despite the clear signs and warnings for me to leave?
I really don't know where I'm going with this, but I'm really grateful for everyone who has followed this blog, who have given me the chance to improve my writing. I guess it's time for a genuine goodbye? Because as I'm writing this, I don't really plan on coming back and that's the honest truth, with every hiatus I try and dance around a final goodbye but after this week I genuinely think this is the best decision for myself.
Note : Kindly do not call refer to me as 'Cupid', or anything if you plan on responding and if you do want to remain in contact with me, please message me for my new discord account. I probably won't respond fast as I try and maintain a distance from this account and don't bother contacting me on discord, I'm taking a break from the account as well <3
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HI!!!! Good morning/afternoon/evening to youuu! First, I want to say I really enjoy your fics, it makes me feel like I'm on cloud 9. Too bad their just fiction. Anyways....
Idk if you write fics about benny watts, but ig it's worth a shot, I'm obsessed with play date by Melanie Martinez and that song really fit with benny. When benny was only with the reader to practice or play with her but they have a little thing that a couple does but without label. So the ready gets really tired and have a fight with him, and at the end benny told her his feelings.
Really hope you can make this. And advance thank you! <33
YES!!! My beloved Benny Watts!!!! I love him so much 😊 Thank you so much for your words, yet alas, mine are just fiction *sigh* (also, love your username)
Benny moved a rook across the chess board and your face scrunched up. You were nowhere near the level that the great Benny Watts was, but you liked the think you could predict his moves. You had known Benny since you were children, and therefore were able to practically able to read each other minds. That was an argument Benny used many times to rope you into playing chess with him. If you, the person who was able to prophesy his every move, wasn't able to beat him, then he was confident no one could.
You had tried multiple times to get out of playing chess with Benny (albeit thankful that it was a bit of steady income for the two of you, seeing as you were roommates), but he always managed to trick you into playing with him. Sometimes it was through bets, or he got you tipsy, or he simply looked up with you with puppy dog eyes and you melted.
It was hard though, being Benny's friend. You were constantly left alone at the apartment- if you could call it that- and sometimes had to pick up extra shifts because Benny was too engrossed in chess that he forgot to pick up a check. Your friends had urged you to move out, seeing how the stress could get to you, but you refused. You felt bad about the prospect of leaving Benny. He was your best friend, although you sometimes wondered if you were his. He clearly shared a special relationship with Arthur and Harry, simply because they were all the same sex.
And then there was Beth.
You were unsure of when the girl had first appeared in your life; she had just showed up at one point. And you saw how Benny reacted to her.
You were about to move a knight when a knock sounded on the door. Sharing a look with Benny, both silently agreeing to pause the game, you got up and opened the door. Sighing at the character who was waiting to come in, you moved back to the chess boar and plopped back down on the ground.
"Beth!" Benny smiled brightly. You hated him for it. Your feelings for Benny were probably a main factor in why you stayed by his side, even after he had pushed you into the friend-zone multiple times unknowingly.
"Are you guys playing?" Beth moved to sit by you.
You scooted away from her and towards Benny, gesturing to the board and saying, "Play for me, will you? I could never win against the prodigy."
"Hush," Benny took your hand in his. "You were doing wonderfully."
Without another word, you sat back and watched as the two young adults warred in a battle of the wits. No matter how many times you would watch it, you were always awed at the swift, defiant movements that they shared.
An unwanted pang of jealousy wormed its way into your stomach. Why couldn't you've been great at chess? Would Benny than pay more attention to you? And how could he be so blind? Who else had stood by his side for as long as you?
Throughout the match, Benny continued to hold you hand. When you went to pull away, reaching for a book or magazine to interest yourself in, he pulled you back and muttered something about 'his good luck charm'.
Rolling your eyes at his persistence, you shrugged him off. After a while, Benny was declared the winner, but by a slight margin. Even you were able to see how Benny narrowly avoided defeat. He had gotten lucky. Beth thanked you for letting her drop by, saying she had originally come for a book that Benny suggested. After she had left, you started to pack up the chess board. You had come to live with the fact that in your shared apartment with Benny, chess boards would outnumber anything else.
"You alright?" Benny stretched out on the floor, glancing over your figure.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"Come on, Y/n." Benny shot you a hard look. "I've known you forever. I can see when something bugs you. Out with it."
"Are you blind?" You rounded on his suddenly, your odd question confusing the boy.
"What do you mean?"
"Can you see what's in front of your eyes?" you pressed again. "Because I don't think you can. Every time that Beth, a lovely girl, no doubt, but only a new, shiny toy to you, rounds the corner, you're transfixed and I can't understand why."
"Where is this coming from?" Benny exclaimed, feeling bombarded.
"Haven't I been enough?" You ignore him and continued on. "I've tried to be a great friend, but it's hard sometimes. It's especially hard when I've been crushing after you for the past few years and you can't realise that I like you!"
"You like me?" Benny stilled, blinking owlishly at you.
"Of course, you idiot!" You wanted to throw the chess board down but knew that a line you shouldn't cross. "We've had some pretty bad arguments in our lives and any other friends would've separated by now. Why do you think I always come back to you?"
Benny couldn't help but let a laugh escape. "You come back to me?" he clarified, shaking is head. "No, Y/n, I come back to you. God damn it, I like you too. Love you, in fact! Ever since I first set my eyes on you. You, may I remind you, had a school-girl crush on that one boy, Jack. So, I backed off. I've been harbouring feelings for you ever since."
You stared at him. "Pardon?" you asked finally.
"I guess I am blind." Benny flashed you a brilliant smile that made you melt. "Blinded by my love."
#benny watts x reader#benny watts#queens gambit#queens gambit x reader#benny watts imagine#benny watts oneshot#literally wrote this in one sitting#not proofread#thomas brodie sangster#i've missed writing for him
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i usually don’t message anyone or anything but i just wanted to say i love your characterizations of konig, ghost, and soap very much. the love and appreciation you have for these characters really come through in your writing.
the cod fandom is full of talented writers but the majority of them write smut. it gets tiring scrolling through the tag and just seeing porn when i actually just wanna see… ppl who enjoy the characters outside of sex appeal, yk? so your blog, truly and genuinely, is a breath of fresh air.
that’s not even mentioning the ppl who write them as abusive or use them to fulfill certain fantasies. i mean i don’t kink shame ofc, but idk sometimes ppl write them in extremely degrading ways that do a disservice to their character and it bugs me a little. plus all the “innocent bimbo reader” rhetoric, idk it gets tiring.
anyway, sorry for the yap session, but i did mean everything i said genuinely !!
💚💚💚💚 Salutations anon! You really don't know how much I appreciate hearing this. Seriously, messages like this give me motivation to keep writing and to stay active on here. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU from the very depths of my heart. You've all been so so incredibly kind, sweet, and encouraging 😭 I don't know what I've done to deserve this but it's appreciated and you all are absolutely awesome. This has made my YEAR, thank you for taking time out of your day to send my silly self a message 💚💚💚💚💚
I'm so so happy my characterizations have hit the mark for some people and that I'm (hopefully) doing them some justice! I'm always worried about that because characterization matters heavily to me and I want to respect their characters and how much they mean to me and other people through it EVEN IF THE WRITERS OF THE LAST MODERN WARFARE DON'T KNOW WHAT A PROPER STORY LINE IS AND KILLED SOAP WHICH I'M NOT FORGETTING, IM NOT FORGIVING, AND IM CERTAIN NOT LIVE LAUGH LOVING WITH IT. I'm refusing to accept he's dead, no matter what they say
I love the boys all so much. They all have such interesting things about them and have a lot more dynamic to them than people think and I just want to represent them right, especially lesser appreciated characters (haven't actually really written for them yet but Keegan, Logan, Hesh, Sandman, Roach, Nikto, Krueger - legit I love them, anyone feel free to send asks or scenarios you'd like I WILL write them. Legit, y'all, you can send me asks about certain characters even if there isn't much on them. I WILL do my research and I WILL write to the best of my ability)
Oh there's many talented writers in the COD Fandom, there really are. I can't say I really know any personally seeing as I never really interact with other blogs but I've seen some reallly really nice fics with so much thought put in them. But equally, there's a lot of just... smut. Not even well written smut, I'm sorry, but a lot of it is just really, really poorly written. I'm all for do what you want, write whatever makes you happy. Freedom of speech! If it makes you happy, cool! But I'm also going to cringe cause a lot of it is... yeah, yikes
Not trying to be the smut police and say every detail must be accounted for and everyone should follow it in a certain way but plz basic anatomy 101, basic prep 101, no guy gal or enby pal will appreciate it if you just shove it in to anywhere dry and I've seen a loooot of that and other things that just hurt?????
I get it, people learn by reading/writing, but this is literally just a single search away. And common sense. There's also a lot of practices being unsafely represented (like fifty shades of gray level) and uh it's not on purpose, it's not meant to be dubious, but it just is written as that. PLEEEEASE please please do some research, the internet is right there
But I felt the same way. Like bless whatever y'all want to write, no shame and NO shade to writing smut. I'll probably eventually do it myself again in the future (undecided on that but it'd likely be a side blog if I do and would never be a main focus, I prefer story over smut action. Once again, no shade and no shame to those who don't, to each their own!). Never ever going to full on NSFW mode or only writing that, I'm always always always going to prioritize writing the characters first and trying to get more stories out there about them :D
But I got tired of opening it and all I see is just... smut, smut, more smut, extremely dubious content x 50. And maybe a sprinkle of normal things or fluff here and there. I just don't look in the tags honestly anymore, because so many people just don't properly tag it or give 0 warning at all, not even under a read more, just BAM, unavoidable unless you flat out don't look at the tags at all
There's more to the characters than just being attractive 😭and I love exploring those aspects of them and trying to figure out why they are the way they are
Also I'm ALWAYS going to have an issue with people who fetishize horrible things. When you're actively fantasizing and writing about someone abusing someone else, like flat out abuse, and being incredibly toxic and terrible to someone - just, please talk to a therapist. That's not social commentary, that's not a proper portrayal of real, HORRIBLE things that affect many people and have very real repercussions - that's perpetuating the negative narrative around a lot of struggles and setting it back by instead turning it into something that's treated as attractive. I really fully can elaborate on this and have a whole rant - but it's not cute and it's NEVER cool to fetishize actual, awful awful things that happen to people. Dead dove doesn't excuse you from judgement - especially when it's not even acknowledged. You're just saying you know what you write is probably morally reprehensible. Hey, I'm going to reprehend and won't respect you at all when you write awful things just cause and get off on it. Think people forget that. Dead dove is a descriptor and doesn't excuse you or make you instantly free from judgement or mean you're not doing something problematic/disgusting. It's just saying you know it is, that's about it.
I don't get why people do that when it's clear they have no idea what they're talking about. I've seen that a lot with the bully! Things. Like... wow, clearly some of you WEREN'T bullied and you're writing about it and it shows because if you were, hey, you know how fucking awful that shit is and how it leaves life long effects. Not saying this applies to all but there's a lot I see like that where it's just ".... wow, okay, so you don't have any idea what you're talking about, cool."
AND YEAH the mischaracterization really does do a great disservice where it's clear they're just after the characters for their physique. They just warp them so bad it's like "Are we talking about the same character?" . In AUs you get to explore that and can shape them to your wants, that's your choice! Highly recommend AU's, it allows so much freedom.
But when it's like.... regular? And it's just no where close and they're doing a 180 in how they actually are (like having Ghost flirt with strangers and be big scary daddy dom im sorry he's not at allllll) I don't get it and it's clear you really aren't writing about or for the character - at that point, plz, make your own characters. Just make your own OCs, it's great! And you can make them HOWEVER you want instead of just ignoring a character's characterization to make them fit what you want. And guess what? It's your character so you can TRULY do what you want and have them the way that you want instead of bending characters to fit a box that they weren't made for
I'm not saying you HAVE to write a character the same as me or in a specific way, but when it's a character with an established personality/backstory, the least you can do is follow that outside of AU's if you're writing for them. That's... the whole point of writing that character - I don't get why you'd write for them specifically if you're literally going to ignore everything about them
SPEAKING OF THE INNOCENT BIMBO THING, I'm also really not a fan. Once again, if that makes you happy to write or read, cool! I just am NOOOOT a fan. Why does the reader always have to be so small and so delicate and so pure/innocent? Why does the reader have to be just so UWU coded? Why are they always like "oh you're so little and small :( and just don't know any better" . It's either that or they're John fucking Wick with little in between. Pleeeease it hurts my soul
Its why I try to genuinely write a neutral geared reader with reactions that will likely fit a lot of people! I'm always taken out of a story's immersiveness when it mentions something like like your hair length or how uwu small you are in comparison. Give me just... average sensible reader. Give me reader who has realistic human reactions. Give me reader who isn't perfect, give me a reader who isn't magically special or different. Give me a reader who is just doing their best, who is THEMSELVES, with no intent otherwise. I love those fanfics so so much instead of trying to feel like I have to be something I'm not to get myself in the mindset to read some pieces NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR YAPPING. IM ALWAYS WANTING TO TALK IM ALWAYS AROUND 💚💚💚💚THANK YOU FOR THE MESSAGE IT MAKES MY HEART WARM AND MAKES ME SO SO HAPPY
#ghouldtimetalks#cod fandom rant#rant#vent#going a little insane in the membrane#insane in the brain#call of duty#cod
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ultimate ship confession lets go (well not really but here's what i think):
cleril: isn't in a great place right now, but it has potential to be good. i like them a little more platonically. people need to stop ignoring peril's character development omg.
glorybringer: i'm too tired to care at this point. this has been debated to death.
blacier: it's kind of cute (well, the fandom version is; canon is more toxic and that's less of my thing. good for you if you like that though). no strong opinions.
jamapple: POSSIBLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE SHIPS 💖💖💖💖 they got their spotlight in OND BOOK and that's all they needed to win me over. the flashback to them snuggling in the hammock????? MY HEARTTTTT 💕💕💕💕💞
mastermind x chameleon: i have seen this shipped maybe twice. and i can't get it out of my head. it's just so interesting to me.
winter x kinkajou: wait...... maybe? a part of me thinks they could be cute, but most of me says pass.
ripnami: somewhat has potential; is currently very boring and questionable. i'm not against tsunami having a love interest, but i'm loosing faith in riptide. riptide i KNOW you can become interesting please do literally anything before you bore me to death.
lunatail: they're adorable together!!! obsessed with them omg. people need to talk about them more (for my sake).
clearsight x sunstreak: no opinions; seems fine. i feel like most of the people who hate this ship hate it because they wanted clearsight and darkstalker to get together. which. 🤨
moonbli: it's just okay. a little cute, slightly bland. could get better as they develop their relationship.
quinter: i normally love these types of dynamics, but i'm not interested in quinter? no idea why. i guess like them more platonically.
sunnyflight: uhhh no. don't like this one. i think sunny kindly shutting starflight down and him being okay with that is very refreshing.
whiteout x thoughtful: i feel like people forget about them a lot..... and i can see why. i really think it's cute how they're both artists, but they just don't have much momentum.
glacier x boa: i find this one is more compelling than blacier. glacier crying when she heard boa's backstory... girl me too.
smolder x thorn: i started to appreciate this one so much more when i read smolder's section in the guidebook. that man was a sopping wet disaster. hope they're happy together. i really like them.
sunnyspeaker: seems very cute! no strong opinions. i'd feel a little bad for starflight lmao.
mangrove x orchid: 💖💖💖💖💖💖 I LOVE THEM AND I NEED TO KNOW HOW THEY'RE DOING.
anemone x tamarin: anemone SERIOUSLY needs a good influence, so i think tamarin would be good for her. i'm very curious and i want to see their relationship develop.
winterwatcher: ehhhhhh. i can see the vision, but the vision isn't for me.
scarlet x burn: no. love LOOSES 🔥🔥🔥 the only love for burn is BLOODSHED.
starspeaker: it's cute. that's it. idk. i used to not like them together, but now i think they're fine.
sunlow: 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 THEMMMM!!!! the flashback to their first meeting had me giggling and kicking my feet.
darksight: no. their relationship was very interesting and complex and well written, but from a shipping standpoint??? no way in HELL.
kinkajou x moon: it's cute! no strong opinions. stuck between whether i would like them more as friends or lovers.
clearsight x listener: fun to entertain, but i like them better as friends. if clearsight stayed on pyrrhia, listener would've turned her into a wine mom and they would gossip.
lynxfall: no strong opinions. they're both gay as hell and seem right for each other, but i'm just not really interested. again, no idea why.
anemone x pike: i DO like the bodyguard trope... but anemone x tamarin has more potential in my eyes.
blicket: kind of a guilty pleasure for me....... YES it was rushed but they're really cute this each other. luna imagining that wedding tapestry of them...... melting my heart.
umber x qibli: sounds cute. i like the idea of umber crushing on qibli and then finding someone else though.
turtlejou: meh. has a little potential, but is mostly boring to me. i appreciate how kinkajou was honest with turtle about her feelings at the end.
blister x morrowseer: idk. if they were married i think they would try to poison kill each other 24/7.
carnelian x moon: ehhhh, not for me. i don't like it that much. maybe because carnelian is kind of an eh character to me (SORRYYY i know a lot of you guys are carnelian girlies).
fathom x indigo: glad they got a happy ending. wish we got to see them interact a liiiiiiiiitle more, but i like them.
pertle: no. they're besties and you can't change my mind.
snowfall x sky: thought about this one for a while...... but..... ehhhhhhhhhhhhh...... no.
coral x blister: no.
jambringer: again, very fun to entertain; i can see the vision. but i can't abandon the jamapple ship 😤
arcticslayer: probably one of the most realistic relationships in the book. very conflicted about them. i think they were more attracted to the ideas of each other. maybe.
ok i KNOW there's more ships but i'm cutting it off here because this is getting long. also i haven't read the winglets so idk what's going on over there.
if you're hurt by my opinions and want to rage over them, you're a baby. ship whatever you want (so long as it's not really really weird); i do NOT care.
.
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Hello! Idk if your requests are open but I just wanted to get this off my head before I forget it😅
I was thinking a sagau with a creator reader who’s secretly a super-genius( iq of a gods level) who sees everything like it’s a hologram?( stuff like math, science, medical, mechanical, strategies, etc…) how do you thing they would react if they got to see from the creators perspective? Who would find it useful? Who would find it more annoying? Who would be impressed about it? How would take advantage of it in battle?
Ah, my requests are indeed open as of right now! when I first read this I thought of that one woman and the random ass math equations meme :sobs: also childe's is short 'cause idk what to do for him...
anyways, this is a cool idea!! chars. used are : Al-Haitham, Childe, and Kaveh. i love Kaveh sm :((<3
start below cut
AL-HAITHAM
Oh, when Al-Haitham first saw you randomly fiddling with seemingly the air, he thought maybe something might be wrong with you. Maybe you were sleep deprived? Sick? Tired? Slightly delusional? You, of course, noticed he was staring at you and sighed.
"Stop staring at me like I'm crazy and just come over here and look." He quickly nodded and obeyed. He would never even think of taking another moment to stop. He quickly approached next to you, and then out of nowhere, suddenly a bunch of light [color] words, symbols, and numbers appeared infront of you two. He looked at them, hen back at you, and then back at them. What were these? So many equations he'd never seen before... You glanced at his confused face and suppressed a laugh.
How cute he is when he is confused, you thought, smiling to yourself. He was trying pretty hard to understand them, though it was all something only you really knew.
He slowly gained the courage to ask, "What... are these..?"
"Well, my lovely little scribe, these are all problems and formulas from which I've learned. I haven't implemented them into Teyvat at all, of course though."
'Lovely little scribe..?' He thought, his face heating up a bit. "I-if you don't mind me asking, why didn't you..?" 'Archons, did I really just stutter.. how embarrassing...'
"Well, there really isn't a reason for anyone here to learn it. I merely use it so could help me control the events of Teyvat easier. There is no need for anyone on Teyvat to learn such a thing, if they do not possess the power I do." You said, smiling at his reaction to his new nickname.
"I.. see.. That is very.. interesting." He said, trying to process it all as he glanced at you, just to see you smiling at him, and quickly looked back at the hologram. He couldn't handle it-- you were just too much for him to handle. [positively, of course. he loved the creator in a lot of ways.]
"Not as interesting as you, love."
"!!!"
Oh archons, you've broke him!
end : 1/3
KAVEH
you have no idea how down bad I am for this man istg
"I'm surprised you've gotten the hang of this already! N-Not that I doubted you of course, but most people don't learn so quickly! N-No that I mean to say you're most people, you aren't!! B-But I don't mean to try and single you out, nor do I mean to mean to say you're the same--" Kaveh tripped over all his words, trying to make sure they weren't going to offend you at all, but he just kept poking holes in each until he heard you let out a light laugh.
"It's alright Kaveh. I know what you're trying to say, thank you. I've just got a nifty little trick up my sleeve."
...Archons, he loved your laugh. It made him feel so giddy.
"Do you mind telling me? I-I just want to se if I could use it to hurry and finish my work faster, not that I mean to use you or anything, but--"
You could sense he was about to go on another trail of thoughts, so you simply smiled and said, "It is not a trick that can be learned, it's more of a power I possess." He nodded, and internally sighed.
"...Come here, let me show you. I'll let you decided whether it's useful or not." You said, motioning for him to stand next to you.
What an honor it is, to be invited next to the Divine Creator, and how important it is... and how I get too! Ah, happy day! He thought, as he happily sped walked his way next to you. What happened next, made him feel as if he was ascending.
You carefully grabbed Kaveh's hand and guided up into the air, and as he tilted his head in confusion as a blush appeared on his cheeks, suddenly words, numbers, problems, and more appeared on thin air! They all had solutions and such, and he could understand most of them because they were the ones you two were just working on, but others had unfamiliar letters and language, with different numbers and much different ways of solving them.
"So? What do you think?" You inquired, looking at him to see his reaction. He was completely astonished. You did all of this in one day?! Not say he was doubting you or anything, but he'd never seen it before! Such complex things that took him and others so long took you merely a minute or two!
"...woah." Was all he could mutter as he stared up at the hologram.
You chuckled, and said, "There's one more thing I'd like to show you..." And you guided his hand to another part of the hologram, as if you were swiping. Suddenly, a bunch of blueprints and diagrams appeared, and he quickly recognized them. They were his future projects he had planned on! He stared at them, then at you, and then just turned red. Both because he was flustered, and because he was blown away.
You'd been thinking about.. me..? And from the looks of it.. you've been trying to.. help me?!
You smiled and squeezed his hand, and he had to muffle a little 'eep!'
...He did not do very well muffling it. You chuckled and whispered in his ear, "You're so cute Kaveh, you know that?"
God, he loved the way his named rolled off of your tounge.
[i love kaveh to a normal amount i swear..]
end : 2/3
CHILDE / TARTAGLIA
"What're you doing?"
"Solving formulas to see which artifacts are best for this fight." You answered, continuing to move and use your hologram.
"A fight is a fight! What're artifacts really needed for?" He groaned, dramatically.
"For you? To do more damage. Some others do better support, off-field, healing--"
"Yeah but isn't doing so much math boringgg?" He drawed out, he just wanted to fight this [boss] already!
"Do you want to win this fight?"
"..Well, yeah..!"
"Then let me check these artifacts."
He whined, dramatically. He didn't really see why you needed that stupid hologram, it was quite annoying... taking up all your attention when he's right there! Sure he can't read half of those equations, but he can entertain you more than that 'floating screen' can! That's for sure!
Though, Childe wouldn't push anymore. You're the creator, whatever you say goes.
"Aand... done! Now use these artifacts and--" You handed him the artifacts before he eagerly put them on and grabbed your hand before you could get caught up in those stupid little symbols again.
"Let's go, Your Grace!!! I don't wanna wait any longer!!" He semi-shouted enthusiastically, holding onto you gently. You smiled, and shook your head lightly, but silently laughed.
...maybe you could let it slide this time.
end : 3/3
#morgan.died : writes#genshin alhaitham#genshin al haitham#al haitham x reader#genshin sagau#sagau genshin#sagau au#sagau#creator au#genshin creator au#genshin au#genshin x reader#genshin x you#genshin x y/n#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact x you#al haitham genshin#sagau alhaitham#sagau al haitham#al-haitham#sagau x you#sagau x reader#genshin kaveh#kaveh x reader#genshin childe#childe x reader#genshin tartaglia#tartaglia x reader#genshin cult au
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tucking you in - himeko, kafka
summary; just some sweet platonic fluff with the aunts
genre/extra tags; scenarios, fluff, family fic, idk what else to say like, it's cute fluffy and sweet, child! reader, kafka and himeko are referred to as aunts
[platonic] [5-6 yrs old! reader] [gender neutral reader]
a/n; not much to say about this one tbh. just enjoy some fluff. also kafka's scenario is based off my memories with my mom when i was stuck at family parties late at night with her.
"now, now. your exploring must come to an end, little star." she hummed. you feel yourself getting picked up by himeko, soon turning you to rest your head on her shoulder.
"i don't wanna sleep though. why can't i stay up a little longer?" you moved your head to press your cheek on her shoulder and face her a bit better. "you can't even tell it's like night time here! we live in space!" you pointed at the windows of the express, clearly seeing the glittering stars and void of space.
"mm, yes i know, but even the brightest stars need to rest." she pokes your side, making you giggle. "if they burn too long, they get tired-" you yawn. "just like you."
"mhn.. but..."
"but?"
"but i'm not-" you try to hold back a yawn but fail, "tired."
"of course, of course. we're just going to grab your favorite book to read, and we're gonna lay down, get all comfy.." her soothing voice almost sings like a lullaby as she speaks softly through the halls of the passenger rooms. as you pass by each room, you can hear different sounds.
dan heng's room is humming like a quiet engine from the data library, march is still humming a little tune while she gets ready for bed, trailblazer is shuffling around organizing their room as they settle in, it's an interesting sensation of comfort when you sleep knowing that you have family right by your side. and welt's room is the most quiet of them all, you've never really been in his room but you know it has a lot of "old people things" as you once said.
"we're here." she sang quietly as she opened the door. it was currently a shared room for you and himeko. "you want to stay by my side tonight?" you nodded sleepily. you get ready for bed, though himeko is mostly helping you as your body is limp from how tired you are. "my tired little star.. look at you." she coos, cupping your cheek just squishing it for a moment.
before you know it, you're carried by himeko once again and your head hits the pillow, luring you into a deep sleep next to your aunt.
kafka... was a busy woman. you knew that, everyone knew that. she was just busy.
but that never meant that she never had time for you.
actually more often than not, she would be taking you around when she can. it was really endearing. blade wasn't amused, but she didn't care. and you didn't care either.
but also kafka's encounters and adventures.. were kind of boring. you were there to at least make it tolerable for her. but then you got bored too. and with being bored came being tired.
tonight was slightly less boring night, it was a meeting though so how less boring could it really be. could you even call it a meeting when they're all playing cards? they were still discussing big kid stuff from what you could hear. you didn't understand much of what they were saying. everyone was sat on the floor with a comfortable mat to sit on. your head rested on kafka's thigh as you zone out from the conversation.
you feel your hair get played with. kafka's free hand threads through your hair gently tugging out knots and scratching your scalp just a little bit. "you can sleep if you want, kid. we're gonna be here for a while." she mutters to you.
it takes you a while to fall asleep but hearing the chatter of blade, kafka, and silver wolf has you feeling tired quick. and you fall asleep.
"do we have a blanket?" kafka asks the others. "blade-y? can you grab one from the kid? you're losing anyways, so might as well." she snickers quietly. he obliges, tossing the blanket to her. she catches it, laying the blanket over you. "maybe get a pillow too?" blade gives her a look.
"no."
"you never think of the child, blade."
"i don't care about the child."
"don't ever talk to me or my kid ever again."
#honkai x reader#honkai star rail x reader#kafka x reader#kafka honkai star rail#hsr kafka#himeko hsr#himeko honkai star rail#hsr himeko#himeko x reader
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Do you have any favourite ships? Any media you're interested in or just duo that you enjoy the dynamic of!!
Ok I barely join some popular media they're more like the quiet ones sooo
So uhh Napolington -
I usually stick to one ship in a fandom and call it a day,but in the end Love is love and as long as it's not really problematic I'm fine,Like when I first joined the Napoleonic fandom I stayed with my pairs till this day and those pairs were..(It may be in order)
And these pairs were pure gambles :D aka
I assumed relationships in FANART😨😨😨(Thank you Amino)
•Napoleonic
-Lannes&Ney:I feel like this Pair isn't talk ABT often😔😔😔My only history with them is that they're the first Marshals I found and paired
-Bessimu:Ill tell you a silly story of how I may have shipped them but I like their contradicting personalities!(they're literally the "inside you are two wolves" meme)
....uhhh ok after some thoughts this ship is sort of my guilty pleasure.Like it's literally corroding my brain
-Massoult:OK GUYS HEAR ME OUT-
ok but genuinely I was relieved knowing they're relationship was pretty good (yk more support to the ship rather than just saying they both liked looting-)The letter from Massena also helped and I like imagining them interacting in my head which IM NOT TELLING YOU OR I WILL GET TAKEN TO THE PYSCHE WARD/but genuinely every knew irl or fannon interaction thats positive makes genuinely ecstatic and full of Dopamine(overall I like a tired grumpy man with a...tired...and old man idk)
-I have more actually it's just that I can't explain all since they did say"Media"so my generals but Classical music ig is next
{A ship I feel like my reasoning should just be kept since I'm on thin ice with this is Bethomoz,thank youu}
•Choliszt:Classic, literally unrequited love,I feel bad for Liszt ngl he seemed so genuinely sweet to Chopin (irl)and Chopin is just annoyed(from what I read)this is also the next ship you'll see in the fandom
Berlix- I heard somewhere Berlioz just casually calls Mendelssohn "Love" or something like that overall they seem quite nice for eachother that's all
Prokshos:I love them SM (Rns_williams drop another Prokshos fic and MY LIFE IS YOURS/SRS)I love the escalation from admiration to rivalry between them and even in the end Shosty still cared for Prokofiev:)
{Some rarepairs}
Vivaldi&Bach:They seem honestly so sweet for eachother.Bach's admiration for Vivaldi was so big he transcribed a handful of his concertos (And I think transcription is like a compliment since your spreading the work of an artist you think is great)Oh and look! They're blue and red what a twist
Paganini& Vivaldi: Literally those "AngelxDevil" gacha trope, They're also both Italians and from what I read Vivaldi was considered a Virtuoso before Paganini came in,Id like to see more stuff ABT them
Paganini &Mozart:Mostly a twist thing I genuinely don't hold that much love for it but I do find them funny and silly!
-Some other pairs(Pairs that I don't really think ABT but still pairs)
•Alberose(Genshin)
•Saintpierre(Frev)
•Saintmoulins(Frev)
•Robesmoulins(Frev)
•Madohomu(Madoka Magica)
•Zhongven(Genshin)
•Gakukai(Vocaloid)
•Skk(BSD)
•Shin Skk(BSD)
Anyways thats maybe all I can cram:,)✧・゚:❀✧・゚✧・゚:❀✧・゚Thank you to whoever asked ABT this!Maybe we can even talk further if anyone who saw this happened to have something to say!!!🌸🍓🫶🫶
-yours truly
Oh once again I'm sorry for unorganised and probably worng wording so if you want clarification pls tell me😭😭😭😭I'm scared I got something misunderstood
(ANYWAYS WHAT A TRIP THAT WAS AMIRIGHT????){pls laugh/j}
#napoleonic era#napoleonic shitpost#classical composers#frev#fandom ships#saintspierre#bessimu#massoult#michel ney#jean lannes#napoleon’s marshals#joachim murat#jean baptiste bessières#andre massena#jean de dieu soult#maximilien robespierre#camille desmoulins#antoine saint just#choliszt#chopin#franz liszt#niccolo paganini#hector berlioz#felix mendelssohn#antonio vivaldi#sebastian bach#js bach#rarepair#answered#just girly thoughts
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