#idk why i've been spinning this one in my head for a while but here it is
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cw: NSFW/18+; afab!reader; oral sex (reader receiving); unprotected piv sex
Thinking about virgin!Sanji and virgin!reader and how utterly soft and loving he’d be.
He asks you over and over again if you’re sure, if this is what you want, if you want to do something so special with him—to give yourselves to each other this way. And you can’t help but laugh a little at the worry in his eyes and reassure him that of course he’s what you want, that there’s no one else you’d rather have be your first, that you’re flattered he wants you to be his. When you chide him (as he kisses down your neck and starts to tug at the hem of your shirt) that the very concept is just a societal construct, he nods and mumbles agreements against the soft skin of your stomach, telling you how right you are, but inside he’s still so overcome with how you’re willing to give him such a precious gift as yourself.
He preps you lovingly with his hands and mouth—you’re no stranger to the feeling of his slender fingers inside you, nor the feeling of his tongue against your aching clit, but this feels different. Sanji takes his time, carefully stretching you with his fingers, lavishing every bit of you with that talented tongue of his, making sure that you’re practically drenched in his spit and your wetness until the sheets beneath you start to dampen. You smile and moan and find yourself growing heated as you watch him grind against the mattress, writhing in anticipation, wishing it was you he was fucking. You’re tempted to tell him to stop, that he’ll have himself so worked up that he won’t get to enjoy the next part as long as he’d probably like, but you don’t dare, enjoying the way he subtly moves his hips and the way it makes him moan even more into your cunt. He easily makes you cum on his tongue, as he always does, and he stays between your legs while you come down from you high, kissing your shaking thighs, soothing you with sweet words of praise at how well you did taking his fingers, how surely you’re ready for him now.
Sanji sits back against the pillows and you carefully straddle his lap, both of you nearly vibrating with excitement as the head of his cock presses against your clit; you grip his shoulders and shakily moan as a warm wave of pleasure takes hold of you. He holds himself steady at the base while you lower yourself down, all his dedicated preparation making it remarkably easy for his flushed cock to slide into you, and you both gasp at the feeling as you sink down onto him—it’s like he was made for you.
You slowly start to grind against him; he grips your plush hips, pulling you down tightly against his lap. Honeyed words spill from his lips, telling you through sighs and moans how good you feel, how perfect you are, how lovely you look like this. You’re all he wants and needs right now, everything he ever wished for, and he fights to keep from clenching his eyes shut in pleasure, just so he can watch your every movement, see just how pretty you look with his cock buried inside you.
His hands wrap around your back and he pulls you close against his chest, his face buried in the crook of your shoulder as he whimpers. It’s abrupt, the way his hips and thighs tense and shudder, and a low whine that carries your name leaves him. You feel a sudden warmth inside you, and your movements slow as you lean back to look at him.
“Sanji…did you cum?”
He holds you tighter and sobs apologies into your neck—he’s so sorry, he should’ve gotten off earlier to make him less eager, he should have asked you to use your mouth or your hand like you’re so good at doing so he’d be less excited, less apt to lose himself so quickly to how perfect and wet and warm you feel. It’s not like how he wanted it to be, not what he wanted to give to you—his sweet love deserves better than that, he mumbles into your skin, deserves nothing less than perfection.
You grab him by the face and kiss him softly, tell him everything is fine—that it’s flattering that you felt so damned good to him that he couldn’t contain himself. And now that you’ve gotten this out of the way, it’ll be easier to enjoy—there’s no more pressure, no more build-up, just you and him and the desire that binds you together. He presses his forehead to yours and sighs, runs his soft fingertips down your arms, and you can feel his pulse start to settle, his breathing begin to steady. Not to worry, he assures you as he leans down and his tongue traces your jaw, lips softly pressing against your neck—he suspects it won’t be long before he’s ready to try again.
#idk why i've been spinning this one in my head for a while but here it is#sanji x reader#lo writes#sanji x y/n#sanji x you
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idk if you would write for this I checked your guidelines and wasn’t sure but I would LOVE a pregnancy scare with Aaron (May be reader is younger than him?)! And she’s just panicked bc he’s older and already has a kid and etc and the test can be pos or neg totally up to you!
thank you for requesting! 1.3k, fem (possibly) pregnant!reader
cw reader's and hotch's attitude towards pregnancy is mostly positive
Your period is twelve days late.
That is not a small amount of time.
You don't notice it at first, and when you do you figure it's a few extra days without an irksome pain, a balm to soothe the ache of your absent boyfriend and a hard job, but when Aaron comes home from a case and you still haven't started your period, the panic begins to set in.
You have a hard time keeping things from him for obvious reasons. His being a human lie detector felt fascinating when you first met, but now it's making things worse. You would've liked some time to yourself for denial, only he can always tell when something is wrong, though it's clear to you he's not sure exactly what it is. He'll realise eventually, you know.
"Let's go to the store," he suggests, his hand flirting with the back of your neck. "You always feel better after a sweet treat."
You've been to the store today, unbeknownst to him, for some emotional support chocolates and a small box you'd rather not think about. You'd hoped that he might get called away to give you time to open it, but without him you're not sure you have the strength.
You hadn't expected to feel this way. You want desperately to tell him, but you're just so, so scared.
"I don't feel like going anywhere."
He hums as his hand moves to your shoulder, squeezing a loving path down to your hand. Jack bangs a toy down in his bedroom across the way, and the washing machine spinning from the utility closet sounds louder than it ever has before, like a rocket about to erupt. You don't know what it is that gets you, but suddenly you're overwhelmed, a confession stuck in the back of your throat as Aaron meets your panicked gaze.
"What's wrong?" he asks. "Here, honey, sit down."
He guides you to a kitchen chair.
"What's wrong?" he asks again, bending at the waist.
Your head rushes with white noise for a second. You wet your chapped lips with the tip of your tongue; you've missed your period, but it isn't that alone that scares you. Perhaps in an instance of a psychosomatic symptom, you feel weird, other. Something has changed. And you're starting to feel sick.
"Aaron, I don't know what to do," you say.
His eyes widen with an expression you don't often see. "Has something happened?"
It's so, so hard to say. "I think I've messed up."
"Not in any way I can't fix."
"Maybe I have," you say miserably, panic hot behind your eyes.
He shakes his head. "You haven't. I swear you haven't. Please, tell me what's wrong before I have a heart attack."
You can't say it while he's looking at you, and when you do it's hardly audible. "I think I'm pregnant," you breathe.
Aaron pauses. You can't even raise your head, anxiety its own heartbeat and nausea rising fast. You let out a gasp you'd held in and try to calm down, even while every little part of you worries about what he's going to say.
You don't know if you want to be pregnant, or have a baby, but you know it would probably break your heart just a touch if Aaron didn't want to have one with you. You're not sure why. And Jack is a beautiful kid but he's growing up. Aaron isn't young.
"How sure are you?" he asks, tone completely measured.
"I… I feel it," you say. "I know that's stupid… 'N my period is really late, nearly two weeks now."
"You feel it?"
"I feel sick." Your elbows on your thighs and the backs of your hands pressed to your eyes, you curl in on yourself. "I'm so scared."
"You're scared?" Hands on your forearms. Aaron gets down on his knees in front of your chair and rubs fondness into your skin, his voice a soothing, familiar comfort as he says, "Sweetheart, you have nothing to be scared of. Don't be scared. I'm right here."
Tears like a shock, relief and horror mixed into one. "I'm so stupid, I haven't even taken the test yet, I don't know why I'm acting this way."
"We all react differently to foreign situations than how we might imagine. What's important now is that you take a breath, because otherwise you'll panic."
While you're afraid of what he's thinking, you trust him implicitly. "Okay."
"Okay," he says, pulling your hands away from your face. "Just breathe, honey."
He's more patient than you knew another person could be. He wipes your straggling tears with his hand without a word, his breath coming in even inhales and exhales for you to follow. The small spike of panic swiftly melds to plain old tears. You're embarrassed. You're unhappy. You and Aaron certainly weren't trying for this occasion.
"What are you scared of?" he asks eventually.
"Of you. Of what you're thinking, and– and what if I– I mean, what if I'm pregnant?" you ask, as though pregnant is a new word. When you said it at first, you'd meant, what if we end up having a baby together? But now you're more inclined to think about the process itself. What if you're physically pregnant?
"Well, you have absolutely no reason to be scared of me. I love you." Aaron puts his hand just under your ear, his thumb to your cheek. "Whatever happens. Nothing else matters to me besides you."
"Because you want a baby," you say unhappily.
"Who says I don't?" He smiles at you softly. "I think we should've had this conversation a long time ago, but the long and short of it is that I love you. I love you and I'll do what you need me to."
"I figured you'd be done having babies," you say, still hesitant.
"Evidently not." He laughs, and you laugh back and he acts like you've hung the moon. "If you're scared of being pregnant, maybe you should take the test before you wind yourself up, hm?"
"I guess I'm acting pretty silly, huh?" you ask, sniffling and wiping your eyes, the two of you caught in breathy laughter again.
"Hormonal, maybe," he says. "Don't be scared. I don't want you to be scared."
"What do you want?" you ask.
"I just want you to stop crying. It's not right…" He strokes your damp cheek. "If I'm honest? If you take that test, and you aren't pregnant, or if you don't want to have a baby," —his face is calm, a small smile playing on his lips— "then I don't want you to, either."
"But if I am?" you ask.
"Then I will be so, so happy, because it's you."
A missed period isn't necessarily indicative of pregnancy, and you could be freshly pregnant or four whole weeks and the test could still come out negative. Maybe your weird feeling is indigestion. Whatever happens, you really believe that the man in front of you is here for whatever answer you find.
"I love you."
"I love you, too," he says, bone deep sincerity turned to something lighter, fondly teasing as he lifts himself up and hugs you close. "You know that."
You let him hold you for a little while, calming down, looking at the positives and all your options. "You think Jack would be happy?"
"He'd love a brother or sister… eventually."
You wipe your tears and runny nose in his shirt and he does you the generosity of pretending not to notice. If you are going to have anyone's baby, you'd want it to be his.
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner blurb#aaron hotchner drabble#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner fanfic#aaron hotchner fanfiction#hotch x reader#hotch#hotch x you#hotch blurb#hotch drabble
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✦ SOMETHING LIKE THIS | eddie m. x reader ✦
wc: 6.3k+
pairing: eddie munson x f!reader
warnings: nothing rlly, partying, drinking, kissing, fluffy fluff, angsty if u squint!, high mention?, drinking games!!, truth or dare bc im such a cliche <3
summary: a truth or dare game with eddie reveals some truths between the two of you.
authors note: omg i feel like i haven't posted in forever and this so LONGG and if u can guess which show i was heavily inspired by when i wrote the closet scene i will give u thousand of kisses. as usual i kinda hate this and the ending but this took forever to write and idk i just love friends to lovers eddie SOO MUCH. this is proofread but i only read it once so pls ignore any mistakes !! also if u guys enjoyed this pls LEAVE FEEDBACK, come talk to me in asks, requests r open!! ily all sm, mwah, em!
You scoffed as you made your way past the drunken slimy bodies, pushing everyone out of the way until you finally made it into the kitchen, having no idea how Steve had managed to throw a bash this crowded and your head was spinning too much to care now.
Stumbling a bit your feet picked you up toward the drink stand, shaking the empty bottles, you sighed. "Really? All of them?" you huffed annoyed as you turned around, spotting Robin with a bottle in her hand, you smirked.
"Robin! You are my hero." You giggled as you approached her, grabbing the bottle despite her protests as you chugged a huge sip, your face contorting at the taste.
"Jesus, slow down! You're going to get black out drunk again and then complain all day tomorrow." Nancy came up behind Robin as she scoffed, this is what you had been doing all week, and Nancy was starting to get worried but you rolled your eyes at her, while Robin gave her a 'don't say that' look.
"C'mon Nance, let her be. She's got enough on her plate as it is!" Robin made a suggestive look as you took another sip, turning to face her.
Nancy pursed her lips as she shrugged. "And what does that mean?" You asked, knitting your brows together. Robin pointed towards Eddie, and your eyes followed.
He was chugging the beer he had a firm grip on, face contorting as he took more and more sips, your heart dropped to your stomach at the sight, you knew he would be here, yet you couldn't help the tingles that overtook your body when you saw him.
You were so stupid.
"I don't know what you mean." You shrugged your shoulders, lying through your teeth, Eddie had been sort of avoiding you for some time, and now, for a whole week, he was acting as if you didn't exist.
You didn't know why or how, but it was eating away at you.
Spending your days drinking and smoking away your feelings had become a regular habit ever since he had started avoiding you, and Nancy and Robin had started to get worried about your current coping mechanism.
To say you were feeling hurt would be an understatement, you and Eddie were supposed to be friends, best friends even, in the last four years, you had grown close to him, so close that being away from him even for a second hurt.
And now this distance, his cold attitude, not returning any of your calls, and eventually pretending as if you didn't exist, was eating at you, your own insecurities were bubbling up at the surface.
What was so wrong with you that Eddie couldn't even tell it to your face?
"I mean, it is weird, I've never seen the two of you apart for an hour, let alone a week." Robin spoke up, mentally cursing herself for not being able to stop blabbering and Nancy gave her a look, one that meant, 'not the fucking time' and you narrowed your eyes, hurt twinging in your chest.
"Shutting up now?" Robin asked awkwardly, shrugging her shoulders in defense, "I hope." You replied, trying to hide the hurt in your tone.
Your eyes searched for Eddie again, he was now conversing with Argyle and Jonathan, he looked uncomfortable, he could feel your gaze on him and he was doing everything in his willpower to not meet your disappointed eyes, he knew he would soften up the second he saw you.
"I think I have a plan." Nancy muttered to Robin behind you as they quickly left your side, you were too busy to notice anything as you leaned on the wall chugging the bottle again, face feeling numb.
You meant to talk to him, ask him why he was avoiding you, but you were afraid of his answer, what if Eddie didn't want to be your friend anymore?
What if Eddie was going to tell you how much he started hating you and that he never wanted to see your face again?
You would much prefer the distance rather than be shunned by him. You doubted you could handle anything without him by your side.
You knew what you felt for him was far beyond friendship now, but you never could fully admit to it.
For months, Nancy and Robin had been trying to get you to admit to it, but you had always refused, saying the two of you were 'just friends.'
But you knew, and they knew that people who were 'just friends', didn't do what you two did, friends didn't have movie nights where they ended up cuddling each other and falling asleep in each other's arms, sometimes, Eddie would even place a kiss on your forehead when you fell asleep, tucking you in as a grin took over his lips, seeing how peaceful you were.
Friends didn't have dates in Eddie's van, seated in the back as the both of you ashed a joint, wasting away the night before you watched the sunset with him, his childish grin as he told you all of his stupid jokes feeling like a kick in your stomach now.
And you knew, you knew, friends didn't look at each other the same way both of you looked at one another.
So, you were nervous, nervous that you had fucked up the only good thing in your life, nervous of what he might say to you.
But this apparent nervousness was nowhere to be seen when you had drunk this much. Before you knew it, you found your two feet dragging you to his side, unable to take control of yourself, the drunk you had decided that you had enough.
You slid past the drunk bodies standing in the way of Eddie, your fingertips anxiously fiddling with the bottle, you could barely balance yourself, smushing yourself against the wall near him.
"Hi." You intended for your voice to come out soft but your words were slurred, and Eddie almost stilled when he heard it.
His heart was thudding inside of his chest, he knew you would be at Steve's party, but he never thought you would actually talk to him, not when he had been a complete asshole to you for a while now.
His gaze was avoidant, almost as avoidant as he was and your stomach was churning again, and this time it was not the alcohol.
It was all him.
"Hey." His greeting was short, your mouth had dried up, and the drunk version of you didn't have the tolerance you had for the past week.
Your eyes narrowed as you straightened yourself. "Hey? Is that all you have to fucking say?" You almost snapped, you hadn't meant to sound so sharp, the words left your mouth like word vomit, it probably wasn't fair how you spat them at him, but his coldness to you wasn't fair, either.
You knew once you brought the subject to him there was no turning back, you were afraid of the possibility of him never talking to you again but the liquid in your system gave you enough courage to do what you feared, ripping the band-aid off, and you thought maybe, maybe, ending the friendship would cause you less pain than whatever he was supposed to be doing.
"Hello?" He attempted to joke, and if you weren't this stupidly smitten over him, and maybe a bit buzzed, it wouldn't have worked, but it did. All it took for him to soften you up was a stupid joke, causing you to giggle drunkenly, as you leaned into the wall again.
"Really?" You shook your head, "That's the best you got?" You tilted your head to the side, giving him a warm smile, you couldn't help it, it was the most you had talked with him this week, and you were already putty in his hands, you hated him, and you hated the effect he had on you.
He shrugged, it was obvious he felt more comfortable, his eyes not leaving yours. "Made you laugh, didn't I?" you nodded, you didn't mean to get this soft on him this quickly, but you couldn't help it, not when he made you feel at ease this easily.
You hated and loved how everything with Eddie made you feel at ease, feeling safe with him like you could bring your guard down for once.
You huffed, mind more mellow as you eyed him. "Missed this, ya know?" Your words were slurred again, you knew it wasn't the alcohol talking, but at the same time without it, you never would have had the courage.
Eddie's eyes were glossy and riddled with remorse as they gazed into yours, you could sense it, sense that he was feeling guilty, you bit the inside of your cheek when he looked at you like that.
"What?" He asked, dumbfounded.
"Missed this-" you pointed between the two of you, "Just missed being with y-you." You couldn't help it when your words were tangled with each other again, it made you scared to admit any of this, while Eddie just gave you a sigh.
"You're drunk?" He questioned. "Again?" If you didn't know how Eddie had been treating you the past week you'd think he was worried about you, considerate even, but the way his actions changed made you doubt his sincerity.
Eddie had been aware of your new coping mechanism, his mouth felt dry when Steve told him how badly you had been taking Eddie's new demeanor.
"Mhm." You hummed, signaling to the bottle as you attempted to chug it again but Eddie shook his head, quickly taking it away from your hands. You gasped as you straightened yourself. "Rude."
"You will get shit faced and have the worst hangover, and I'm sure you'll curse us out for letting you drink that much." He raised his brows to warn you and you pouted at him like a child.
"You sound just like Nancy." You scoffed, biting back the insult you had at the tip of your tongue about how he decided to care about you now, instead settling on making him chuckle, and just with his laugh, you felt a tinge of pride swell in your chest, it was pathetic how desperate you were for him.
"No fun, I'm crossing you out." You whined as you draw an 'X' in the air, with pouty lips and soft eyes, Eddie had a foolish grin on his face when he was comfortable with you again, almost at peace with how your soul embraced his.
He felt like an asshole, and so fucking stupid for the way he acted, but it was the only thing he knew how to do: running away from his feelings.
"Come on, where the hell have you guys been, we've got some drinking games going on!" You were startled by Robin's loud voice, and as turning to face her, you heard Eddie's groans behind you.
"No way." Eddie shook his head and you threw him a puzzled look.
"No?" You furrowed your brows. "But, you love drinking games."
"Yeah, you love drinking games. Don't be a buzzkill, Munson." Robin interrupted, she shot a look at Eddie that made him confused but intrigued, and he couldn't say no when the two of you dragged him to where everyone else was gathered.
You sat down next to him and felt your hazy drunken state get worse, it was as if everything was becoming all too real.
Realizing that the conversation you just had with him meant nothing, not after he had been avoiding you for a week, and now your mind was swirled with the thoughts of what was going to happen when you two finally had 'the talk', anxiety riddling over your body again.
"What game are we playing?" You asked in an attempt to shake off your thoughts, it didn't help when Eddie's gaze landed on you and you could feel your cheeks burning with his gaze alone, causing you to chew on your bottom lip out of nervousness.
"We just played endless rounds of 'Never Have I Ever'" Nancy sighed, almost annoyed.
"Turns out Steve the King is bit of a slut." Robin semi-whispered as Steve gasped, holding his heart to be dramatic.
"Really, Robin?" He furrowed his brows. "Well, it's not my fault you hooked up with the half of—" Robin was interrupted by Eddie's groan.
"C'mon you guys let's just play whatever this is and get on with it." His voice sounded annoyed, you turned to face him, but Eddie was already avoiding your gaze again, he looked nervous, and you wanted to roll your eyes, he was being an asshole, again.
You could feel anger bubbling up inside of your chest, and Robin could feel the tension in the air. "Okayy, truth or dare it is!" Robin interrupted with a nervous giggle.
"I thought we were playing Never Have I Ever-" You were shut up by Robin's shushes.
"Yes and now we switched to Truth or Dare, keep up, sweetheart." You furrowed your brows and giggled, turning to Steve as if to ask what was wrong with Robin, but Steve put his hands up in defense, shrugging.
Something weird was going on and you couldn't put a finger on it, and to be honest, your mind was too fuzzy to figure any of it out, filled both with alcohol and the thoughts of Eddie. Robin grabbed the bottle and spun it around the circle, the anticipation of it made her fiddle in her place, and when it landed on Steve, she groaned.
"Steve! I think you should pick truth, are you a virgin? Oh wait, you are not! Let me spin it again." Robin talked so fast that even Eddie threw her a look, you were usually used to her fast-paced actions but she was giving you a whiplash now.
"Robin, what the hell are you—" Eddie's words were cut short by Robin's shriek.
"Wow! It landed on Eddie, what a surprise." Robin rubbed her hands together almost like a villain in a cartoon.
"So, truth or dare, Eddie? Oh, also you can't say truth because Steve just picked that." Robin hit her hand against her forehead in a fake manner, and you giggled again at her actions, unaware of what was coming next.
"Okaa...ay, dare?" Eddie asked unsurely, and Robin mimicked a thinking face, you had no idea what was coming next, but you doubted anything Robin would dare him to do could fix whatever was going on with Eddie.
"I dare you to..." She paused for a minute.
"Go into that closet and not come out until you and Y/N make out." Robin's words were like a slap on your face, and she had that stupid grin on her face that you wanted to wipe off.
"Excuse me?" The two of you said in unison and you were afraid to look at him now.
"I mean... a dare is a dare." Steve shrugged, and Robin nodded quickly causing you to sigh.
"You are a child, Robin." You threw her a death stare, your mind was still hazy as you began to get up, and Eddie was still where he was sitting, he twisted his rings, an action you knew he did when he was nervous.
"Well, are you just going to wait around all day?" You snapped, not knowing what came over you when you were this drunk.
"You're okay with this?" Eddie's face was almost red as he looked up at you, hating the way a nervous tingle formed in your stomach with how he looked at you.
"It's just a d—dare, let's get it over with." You meant to sound confident but your words came out as a murmur.
"This is so stupid." He scoffed as he followed you into the closet, Robin following up behind the two of you. She locked the door when the two of you entered and she sent you a smirk before she did so, making you scoff.
"I swear I'm going to kill her." You said sharply, turning your back on the door.
When you finally faced Eddie you realized how close he was standing to your face, his tall figure towering over you was enough to make your breath hitch.
"Hi." was all he muttered as he looked down on you, making you realize how much you missed the warmth of his soft gaze and you hated yourself for how enamored you were with him.
"Hi." You managed to let out when you caught your breath, the room felt suffocating, and you could barely swallow the lump in your throat.
The possibility of him kissing you made you want to scream, both from excitement and fear.
"So... we have to kiss?" He said awkwardly, scratching his head, almost as if it were a question and you nodded quickly, knowing he was too nervous to make the first move so you had to take matters into your own hands.
"What's the big deal? It's just a kiss. We've been best friends for years, we can do it." You said, with a nonchalant tone, but the hint of nervousness was still visible.
"Let's just do it!" You announced excitedly, "kiss me, Edward Munson!" Eddie chuckled at that, making you realize how much you had missed that genuine laugh.
"Edward..." He tilted his head, "Really?" He raised a brow, causing you to pout.
"Yeah." You giggled softly, offering him a smile, knowing how much he hated someone saying his full name, he gave you a light chuckle.
“Okay, yeah, I think I deserved that." He attempted to joke, the air still tense but filled with your giggles.
"Let's do this...” Eddie added cooly, his hands at his side as he leaned towards you, licking his lips.
“Why are you licking your lips?” You questioned, making Eddie chuckle, as he stopped leaning in further.
"Should I not?" He raised a brow, "I mean do you want dry lips?” He asked sarcastically and you shook your head chuckling.
"No, no!" You protested, face burning from embarrassment. "Never mind..." You chuckled.
“I didn’t think it was—” Eddie started but you interrupted, “No.. no it’s okay.. I just..” You were a stuttering mess now.
"Let’s do it.. I—I’m ready.” His tone was soft when he spoke, he was less nervous and you nodded frantically.
You started leaning in but then abruptly stopped, making Eddie furrow his brows.
“Do you want tongue? Are you like a tonguer?” You asked, your face was serious and Eddie's eyes widened.
“Am I a what?” Eddie asked baffled as you chuckled, shaking your head.
"Fuck..." You cursed, giggles errupting in your throat from nervousness. "I didn't mean it like that, I just meant—" You were babbling, your heart hammering inside of your chest.
"I mean do you like tongue in kissing? I just— I wouldn’t wanna use tongue if you don’t want to..." You trailed off.
“Let’s just do it!” Eddie exclaimed interrupting as you let out another giggle, your nerves were getting the best of you.
“Yes, sorry. Are you ready?” You asked, weight of anticipation settling heavily in your chest as Eddie nodded, “Yes.. I’m ready.. let’s just do this..” Eddie let out slowly, scratching his head from nervousness as you nodded once again.
You barely moved when he leaned towards you, almost frozen in place you stared at him, stared at the sickly sweet brown of his eyes, stared at his dark hair that messily laid on his forehead, and you couldn't help it when your eyes lowered down to gaze at his lips, adoring the curve of his mouth.
Your gaze was stuck on him in a way that made your eyes glimmer with an array of emotions, not knowing if this would be your first and last kiss with him, trying your best to etch this sight of him into your mind forever, unsure of whether you could ever see him up this close again.
and as if Eddie could read your mind, he realized, he realized the weight of how you were staring at him. With more he studied your face, the connection between the two of you deepened, unraveling what he most wanted. You.
“Fuck— You.. you can’t do that!” He exclaimed, desperately, and you knitted your brows in confusion, “What... what did I do?” Eddie was being ridiculous now.
"Jesus Christ, you can't just do that to me." His face was burning up, he thought maybe, that this dare would be good for him, maybe the best way to get over his feelings was to kiss you for once, but the way your eyes glimmered was enough to make him want to stare at you forever, and he couldn't do that when he was trying to keep his feelings for you bottled up, forever.
Now, he was regretting the dare as he could feel the pressure building and you looked so pretty that Eddie felt his heart sink in his body, if he kissed you, he knew he couldn't contain his feelings for you no longer, he sighed, shaking his head.
“You can't do that thing with your eyes and face!” He exclaimed as you scoffed, “What the hell are you talking about?” You almost yelled, getting frustrated by his stand-offish attitude.
“Okay that’s it.. I— I can’t do it!” He huffed as he reached for the doorknob, struggling with it.
“Let me out guys!” Eddie yelled but Robin just chuckled, “You have to kiss her, you idiot!”
“Let me out of here, Robin!” He yelled louder this time, but instead of Robin answering this time Steve, Nancy, Argyle, Jonathan, and the gathered crowd answered to him, chanting “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” and Eddie rolled his eyes, cursing.
“Oh come on Eddie, let’s just do this! Just one kiss!” You said annoyed, and you felt a bit rejected at how much he wanted to leave.
Eddie turned around to meet your gaze, “No, I’m not gonna fucking kiss you.” His words were bitter and you bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from crying in front of him.
“Eddie we've been best friends for four years! A little kiss isn’t gonna change anything.” The words that left your mouth stung him, it wasn't easy on you but the emphasis on the two of you being best friends and how a kiss wouldn't change a thing between the two of you was the exact reason he was avoiding you.
Eddie knew if you had rejected him, and told him that you didn't reciprocate his feelings, it would eventually lead to the two of you not being friends.
And he couldn't handle that idea, he couldn't handle not being around you. That's why he tried to stay away from you, just so he could contain his feelings for you, at least for a while.
His gaze on you was agonizing, “Stop looking at me like that.” He muttered as you rolled your eyes, and crossed your arms around your chest, annoyed.
“God, will you just kiss me already!” You blurted out, now getting annoyed with him, not being able to comprehend why Eddie was making such a big deal out of this when it was just supposed to be a dare.
"No."
“Why not?” You questioned, eager to know why he had been acting this way, Eddie ran his hands across his hair, ruffling it before he gripped your shoulders to get your attention fully, “Because..." He took a deep breath as he put his trembling hands into his back pockets, he was trying to hold himself back, but he couldn't, not when you looked at him that way.
"Because I don't want to kiss you like this!” He almost snapped, his feelings taking over before his logic could, and you went rigid with his words.
His own reaction was delayed as his eyes widened at his own words, and he was standing close to you, so close, that your breath hitched when he said that. “What.. what does that mean?” Your head was spinning as Eddie looked down, almost as if he was embarrassed.
“Nothing! I didn’t— I just... That’s not what I fucking meant..” Eddie stuttered over his words, he felt like his desperation had trickled into the very air he was breathing in, his own words suffocating him and your gaze mocking him, he couldn't handle it further as people outside the closet started chanting “Kiss! Kiss!” again.
Eddie scoffed again, “Shit— just, excuse me..” He cursed out as he tried the doorknob again.
“What are you doing?” You asked curiously, you wanted to talk to him now.
“Just need some air” He murmured and tried the door again.
“Robin, just open up!” Eddie yelled out making Robin groan, “Did you kiss her?” Eddie rolled his eyes, and he got ready to curse Robin out but you placed your hands over his mouth, shushing him.
“Yes, yes Robin! We fucking did, we even french kissed! You happy?” You yelled out as Robin giddily chuckled unlocking the door.
You threw her a dead stare as Eddie just brushed past her, hurrying his way out and you followed quickly behind him.
"Eddie, just wait!" You called out after him, you were curious to know what he meant, why he was acting this way, none of it was making sense to you and you were still very buzzed.
"Just leave me the fuck alone, Y/N." He didn't even turn around to face you and it hurt.
"No! I'm not going to fucking run away this time." You yelled, catching up to him, and Eddie turned around swiftly.
"What are you talking about?" He asked, his tone curious and not annoyed like before.
"I'm not playing your stupid game anymore, I don't care if you tell me you hate me, Eddie, just tell me what's wrong, tell me what I did to make you push me away this much. You can insult me and tell me to 'fucking leave' but I won't leave until you tell me to my face what I did to make you push me away, you fucking coward!" You spat out the words, rolling your shoulders as you felt your anger coming out to the surface.
Eddie rubbed his hands against his face, you were asking for him to be vulnerable, and he knew that if he opened up to you, you would probably laugh in his face.
"I just—" He scoffed, "I don't wanna do this. Not right now." He sighed, and he drooped his head, his gaze fixated on the ground now.
"Just tell me what the fuck is wrong, Eddie." You almost yelled, feeling your face hot with anger. "What did you mean by when you said you didn't want to kiss me like this?"
"And why have you been avoiding me, why can't you even look me in the fucking eye right now?" To say you were frustrated would be an understatement, liquid courage had worked a little too well and you were pouring your gut out to him.
You crossed your arms against your chest, feeling your cheeks burning up with anger, you were filled with fury, and nothing Eddie could do was going to change that.
In fact, it made it worse when he kept avoiding his gaze. "Fuck you." You spat out, index finger pointed towards him, hostility written all over your face, your feet picked you up before your mind realized, and you brushed past him as you angrily left his side.
"Just— fucking wait!" His words rang in your ears but you didn't care, you kept walking while Eddie was right behind you.
"Let me just explain!" He yelled out after you. "Jesus— you're fucking fast." He added as he tried to catch up to you.
You stopped in your tracks, and your back was turned to him. "Eddie, just get it over with." You crossed your arms against your chest again, feeling your insides twist as you waited for him to pull the band-aid off.
"What?" He raised his brows in confusion, and you didn't dare to look at him.
"You realized it, didn't you? I mean it took me a while to realize it myself." Your voice was timid, not trusting yourself enough that you wouldn't break down completely in front of him.
"And you realized you didn't reciprocate them, and you're trying to let me off easy by avoiding me." You could feel tears prickling your eyes but you shook your head to make them go away.
"I know you hate confrontation." Your voice was cracking now, and Eddie hated it, he hated being the reason you were about to cry, he hated being the reason you doubted yourself because of him.
"What are you talking about? Reciprocating what?" He didn't dare to turn you to face him, he was still shocked at the possibility of what you were hinting at.
"Feelings, Eddie. My fucking feelings for you!" You turned around to face him now, and his eyes had softened, he blinked slowly to process what you were saying. The air between the two of you was filled with unspoken emotions, your body ridden with anticipation and anxiety.
But Eddie felt stupid, so fucking stupid. He spent this whole week bottling up his feelings for you, and avoiding you to do so because he thought he wasn't good enough for you, he thought you would actually mock him.
He should've known you would never do that, he should've told the insecure voice in his head to shut the fuck up.
Because there you were in front of him, saying exactly what he was feeling, and he felt like the biggest idiot in the world.
"Your... what?" His eyebrows furrowed, and he wanted to laugh, he wanted to laugh at how stupid he was being.
"Just— let's just pretend this never happened." You could barely look at him, nervously fiddling with your fingers.
"Nope." He shook his head.
There was no fucking way he would pretend this had never happened, he had been waiting, for years to tell you how he felt, every night he would give himself a pep talk, encouraging himself to finally open up to you, but when he finally saw you in the morning, and you gave him that warm smile and those doe-eyes, he always backed out, scared of losing you forever.
"No fucking way." He shook his head, and a chuckle escaped his lips.
The look you threw him was filled with disdain, "Oh, so this is funny to you?" You were quick to judge him, turning around and muttering curse words as your feet began to pick up again.
"Jesus Christ, will you let me speak!" He yelled out again and you shook your head, walking faster. Eddie scoffed, "So. Fucking. Stubborn." He muttered under his breath.
He caught up to you once again and this time he reached out to your free hand, and he grabbed it in a tight firm, spinning you around to face him, you were about to cuss him out again, and throw him a death glare, but his gaze was so gentle that you couldn't help it, your eyes were mellow, sickly sweet, as they met his.
Your heart reacted before you could, thumping in your chest. Eddie was leaning so close towards you that you sensed his heavy breathing against your face, you didn't dare to move, not until his tender fingertips brushed against your cheeks, he leaned over so agonizingly slow that you couldn't help but close the gap between the two of you, soft lips clashing with each other as you whimpered the second your mouth met his.
Eddie's chest fizzled with warmness, the smell of your perfume mixed with alcohol dizzying him while your head was still pounding as you were trying to process what was happening, there wasn't enough air in the world for your lungs to pull in.
You deepened the kiss when Eddie's hands slowly cupped your cheeks, parting your lips as his tongue explored yours, shuddering at his touch.
Your brain didn't process any of it, not until the initial shock wore off, that's when you pulled back slightly, catching your breath as you blinked confusedly at him, unable to find the words to speak.
Eddie licked his lips as they twitched to form a smile, speaking up before you could. “In the closet.. when. I said I didn’t wanna kiss you like that... I meant that I wanted something like this..” He gave you a slight chuckle as you returned it with a warm smile.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted." He gulped, feeling guilty for his actions in the past weeks, but he always poorly reacted to things that involved his feelings.
"I thought if I just stayed away from you, if I just pushed you away for a while, I could bottle up my feelings for you and—"
"You have feelings for me?" You asked, interrupting, eyes widening despite the kiss being undeniable proof of that but you still couldn't believe it, you still couldn't believe that the man you had been in love with was actually reciprocating the feelings you harbored, the feelings you tried so hard to contain inside of you.
"Are you kidding? Of course, I do." Eddie affirmed. "I mean how could I not?" He chuckled, pointing towards you. "Jesus, you're so beautiful, so fucking pretty..." he flashed you a mischievous smile.
"You're nice, and god, so fucking kind that it makes me sick sometimes. And shit— you get along with Wayne so well, I think he thinks of you more as his kid than me at this point." You gave him a light chuckle.
"Also... you are funny sometimes too." He added, giving you a light nudge with his shoulder as you pointed towards yourself mouthing 'Little old me?' sarcastically, making him smile.
"Fuck— if it wasn't for you, I'd be so lost, sweetheart. I'm so glad you came into my life." Your heart warmed at his words, gaze softening as your lips twitched into a smile.
"And you're always fucking there for me... even when I don't deserve it." He nervously fiddled with his fingers, he didn't deserve someone as perfect as you.
"Like right now, even though I've been an asshole, avoiding you, and even more of an asshole in the closet, you still came after me." He looked down, embarrassed that he had pushed you away, he knew you deserved better, so much better.
"You didn't deserve any of it, you just deserve every fucking good thing there is, and I'm just none of those things." You shook your head, opening your mouth to speak but Eddie didn't let you.
"Can you even picture it? You and me together? You— god, you are so fucking perfect." Your heart pounded against your chest, the rhythm of it erratic and suffocating because of his painful words, if only he knew how much you loved him.
"I'm just me, Eddie. I'm fucked up, a 'freak', a fucking drug dealer." Deep lines etched his forehead, he chuckled bitterly, and your heart throbbed at him describing himself as anything but good.
"I guess I just decided I wasn't good enough for you. Fuck— I chickened out." He eyed you nervously, and what he didn't expect was you slapping him on the shoulder, harshly.
"Ow!" He yelped, "Eddie never, ever make decisions on my part ever again." You chided him and he nodded quickly, "Jesus, that hurt."
"Good, because I also don't allow you to speak that way about yourself either, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me Eddie and I mean it. You're not fucked up." You affirmed him.
"God, you really are the best thing that has ever happened to me, Eddie. I don't think I've ever been happier, or more comfortable with anyone but you, you helped me realize so much about myself and have been there with me through everything." You didn't blink once, and Eddie's mouth was agape, he couldn't believe that someone —and not just anyone, you— saw him as anything more than a fuck up.
"I love you, Eddie, and I mean it, I love you so fucking much." You added, your eyes glimmering. "I can't stop thinking about you, ever... and it physically hurt being away from you for just one fucking week."
"I'm sorry for that..." He muttered again, embarrassed. "I love you so fucking much, honey. And I promise I'll never do something as dumb as this again." He gave you a warm smile, and his fingertips were gentle as they grazed over your cheeks.
You tilted your head in hesitation, "Yeah, I doubt it." You giggled, and Eddie squished your cheeks in response.
"God, you're so lucky that you're so pretty and so lucky that I fucked up big time because I will agree with you on whatever you say for the next few days." Eddie's lips formed a smirk and you raised a brow, "I'm thinking for the next month." You pursed your lips sarcastically.
Eddie chuckled and leaned in once again to kiss you, "Whatever my pretty girl wants." He murmured into your lips.
You whimpered again when your lips touched, both of you groaned when you were interrupted by Nancy's voice.
"See, I told you it would work!" Nancy pointed towards to two of you kissing as Robin and Steve almost gasped.
Robin turned to Nancy crossing her arms against her chest all-knowingly, "Yeah but it wasn't working a minute ago when they were yelling at each oth-" Robin's words were cut short by the glare Eddie and you threw at Robin.
"Sorry!" She yelled out, giving a sheepish smile, making you laugh.
"So, this was all you?" You asked, pointing towards Nancy, but before she could answer Robin scoffed.
"As if I didn't put your stubborn asses in that closet!" She mocked. The puzzle pieces of Robin acting weird all night coming to you and Eddie at the same time.
"You guys are all idiots." Eddie huffed, but his smile never faltered, and the three of them knew that was his way of gratitude.
You turned towards them with a sheepish smile on your face mouthing a 'thank you' to Robin and Nancy, and giving Steve a thumbs up, they waved you off as if to say 'No problem', and you turned to Eddie again.
"Eventful night, huh?" He asked, a smirk playing on his lips, and you gave him a playful nudge. "Shut up."
"So... you ready to go home?" Eddie asked as he threw an arm around your shoulder, you nodded, melting into his comfortable hold.
"Mhmm." You hummed, as he pressed a kiss on your hair. "I love you, pretty girl." He murmured.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fics#eddie munson oneshot#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff#friends to lovers
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This thoughts still cooking, so it might not make sense, but I think Thomas (Tomas?) Astruc is a very good case study on how being too attached to your own ideas can hinder your story telling.
I don't mean this in a "Thomas's original idea for the series was bad", but rather that he seems so attached to this concept that he can't stand other people having a differing view from him.
Chloe's the titular example here. Some people thought she deserved a redemption arc, and instead of just saying "nah, I don't think so" and continuing to write her the same way he had been, he had to prove them wrong, prove that his idea was the only correct one, and so turned her into the spawn of Satan and let her rule over Paris for some reason.
Instead of making Marinette less stalker-y, he wrote an entire episode poorly justifying it. And, imao, somewhat diminishing what PTSD actually is and does to people.
I'm not saying he has to make any change (though I think making Marinette less stalker-y would be a good change), but instead of 1.) sticking to his resolve or 2.) taking the criticism, he clung dearly onto this perception of his characters and his writing suffered because of how much he had to twist things to "prove" that his original assertions were right. And also that everyone who disagreed with him was wrong and didn't understand
idk if that makes sense, but the concepts been lingering in my head recently
It makes perfect sense! I've had similar thoughts. It's hard to say for sure, but Miraculous may be a case study in "kill your darlings". I'm not deep into the behind-the-scenes lore and I was not here in the early fandom, but I do know that, at some point, a much darker version of the show was pitched. That's why these exist (image source):
[Image description: two sketches styled like comic book covers. Both have the title "The Mini Menace Ladybug". The left cover shows Marinette's silhouette in a doorway. The door's glass and the glass of a nearby window are broken. In the foreground lies a hand holding a ladybug charm. The hand is limp and surrounded by blood, implying that someone is injured or dead. The right cover is Ladybug doing a spinning kick while looking angry.]
We also have this evidence of the darker original concept:
Jeremy Zag then proposed another project... which he was unable to sell to broadcasters... the project was called "Ladybug". No one was interested, as the project was aimed more at an adult audience... Sébastien had to make sure that the project could be broadcast on Disney and TF1.... Thomas wanted to make a series for adults, but at the time, it was very complicated to make a cartoon for adults. What's more, they didn't have enough money to take on such a project. Sébastien finally agreed, but there were some changes to be made, which Thomas accepted... In the end, Thomas Astruc's entire project was discarded, leaving only the love story between the two heroes and the city of Paris, where the story was to take place.
I've been aware of this darker origin story for a while due to Tumblr and, because of this knowledge, I have often had the thought, "are the writers trying to sneak elements from this darker version into canon?" Because that's the most likely explanation for what's going on here.
If I'm right, then I think that was a terrible move on their parts. They needed to let go of the story that they couldn't sell and embrace the story that they're being allowed to tell. It's why "kill you darlings" is such good advice. Many good stories have been ruined by writers clinging to an idea that ultimately doesn't work for some reason.
It's why the sitcom How I Met Your Mother has such a universally hated ending. The show was originally supposed to go for two seasons and so they wrote an ending that would fit the second season. The show ended up running for nine seasons and, by then, the ending didn't fit, but the writers kept it and left everyone with a bad taste in their mouths, which is not what any writer wants. That's why you have to do what's best for the story even if it means abandoning something that you really love.
This early version of canon may also be why the writers are so obsessed with Marinette. My understanding is that this concept had her mainly acting as a solo hero and, oh look! What is one of canon's biggest problems? Marinette being treated like a solo hero even though she has a partner and, later on, a team!
Not saying that this theory has to be true, just saying that it would explain some things. And if they're poisoning canon by trying to include elements from their darker original? Then it makes sense to assume that they're also doing it for smaller stuff. Like I'm pretty sure I've read that the head writer wanted Chat Blanc to be a lot darker originally, but no one would green light it, so we got an incredibly lackluster episode that spat in the face of the genres Miraculous' is trying to be part of while also falling to have the sort of impact we'd expect from an episode like that. It's a good example of a darling that really should have been killed. It just doesn't fit.
(Totally unrelated sidenote, but is your blog name from Tangled? Because that's what I immediately thought of and it made me smile!)
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Dance For Me, Baby HC
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Pairing(s): Rhysand / Eris / Azriel / Lucien / Cassian / Tamlin x reader
Warnings: IMPLIED SUGGESTIVENESS, READ WITH CAUTION
Summary: Each male is in a different situation with a famous female with you as the OC, and you're in a performance-based setting. The perfomance is based on the song/dance listed with each character (:
SR’s Note: I hope you guys like this lol idk where or why I thought this one up
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Rhysand's Performance - Vigilante Shit (Taylor Swift)
"Draw the cat eye sharp enough to kill a man."
"WHOOO, YES!" Rhysand unashamedly shouts through the quieted arena, all eyes turning to face him and gush
All your fans knew of your relationship, and to put it simply... the two of you were absolute goals
He was the best boyfriend, coming to every show he could, always being so supportive of you, and offering his love in every way -- when you were on (and off) the stage
You can't help but chuckle into the mic while trying to remain serious during your song as Rhys bobs his head along to your sensual song, swaying back and forth with your movements
"And she looks so pretty..." you lilt, and he claps loudly from the front row where he watches
"YES SHE DOES!" he shouts. You roll your eyes playfully, many fans in the pit "aww"ing at the interaction and watching the two of you
You try and remember to focus your attention to the whole crowd as you perform your routine on the chair -- it's hard when your handsome man is literally right there, catching your eye
Ugh, let's face it -- that chair should be him, shouldn't it?
Nonetheless, it propels you to dance harder, and keep going; you know his pride in you, and the reward you'll get later for working so hard
Sneaking a glance just one more time at Rhys, he's gazing at you lustfully, a smirk on his lips as he watches your arms and body roll in tandem with the music, the beads on your tiny dress swaying with each movement of your hips
The moment the song ends and the stagelights dim, you feel his delicate touch in your mind, voice delicate, unlike his promise of what is to come post-show
"I'll be the one getting revenge later, darling."
・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Eris' Performance - Greedy (Tate Mcrae)
"Alright! Let's uh... let's run Greedy one more time before we call it? Yeah?" Your manager's voice echoes through the open arena, bouncing off the open walls. You nod, and glance to the left corner of the arena when outside light floods in
One of your bodyguards is ushering in someone, and it only takes you a moment to figure out who it is. You hold up a "1" finger, and your manager sighs, nodding from the sound booth near the ceiling as you hop off the stage and jog toward your bodyguard and the approaching guest
"Hey!" You say, excitedly throwing your arms around your boyfriend's neck. He smiles brightly, pulling you into a hug and spinning you around by your waist
"Hey baby," he mumbles into your hair, setting you onto the ground gently. He pulls back to gaze into your eyes, and you smile breathlessly up at him, sweat sticking on your forehead
"I'm sorry I got here a little early to pick you up, " he glances around. "Maybe I can watch the end of your rehearsal?" He asks cautiously. You roll your eyes playfully and push his shoulder lightly
"I'm mainly practicing my moves today," you say. He glances to the top of your head and smirks
"I can tell," You gasp and swat his chest, causing him to laugh. You cross your arms over your chest
"Well... I've been at it all day. I can't promise it'll be all that good," you say. He only shrugs
"Show me what you've got."
You raise your brow at the challenge, sauntering back to the stage and climbing back upon it
"HIT IT!" You shout, and your manager begins the track to your song "greedy". On instinct, you begin singing along. Your voice is drowned out by the loud music, but you don't mind; Eris has heard you sing a million times
You accentuate each move to the fullest, performing this time as though your life depends on it. He has approached the edge of the stage, lightly crossing his arms over his chest, and staring you down like he's ready to eat you whole
You continue to dance, whipping your hair and moving your ass in a circle the way you were choreographed to do, but as full as you are physically able. Eris watches intently, smirking and shaking his head at you
As the song draws to a close, you stand, panting and bracing your hands on your hips
"Alright! I'll call it for today." Your manager says over the speakers. "Really good run, Y/N. Maybe your boyfriend should come to all our rehearsals," she says with a chuckle. You can't help but huff a laugh, dropping to your knees and sliding off the stage. Eris meets you, brows high on his forehead as he leans close to whisper in your ear
"Don't ever tell me you don't dance good again."
・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Azriel's Performance - Don't Start Now (Dua Lipa)
Azriel was more than excited to be your +1 to an awards show you'd been invited to perform at
This wasn't your first performance, as you'd toured before, done shows, all that... but you'd only been with Azriel for a couple of years, and you hadn't toured in that time, meaning he'd never seen you perform live
"You have a lot of fans," he said, wrapping his hand around your waist tighter as a million cameras flashed around the two of you on the carpet outside the venue
"Trust me dear -- they find you much more interesting," you say. You love to see the small tinge of pink that shades his cheeks, only you being the one to make him blush
After a few short interviews, autographs, and more photos -- Azriel walks you toward the stage door and presses a sweet kiss to your cheek
"You will do amazing, my love." He says
He's the only one to make you blush, too
"I'll find you after," You promise. He gives you one last small smile, and leaves you go get prepared for your performance
You don't meet his stare again until you're taking the stage for your hit single, "Don't Start Now"
The way his eyes roam over you in your pink two piece outfit make you feel as though you're one of the trophies being handed out tonight, and you begin singing, walking in time to your song with your dancers
When you get to the dance break, you're directly in front of Azriel in the front row, his eyes wide as he takes you in fully moving like a goddess in front of his very eyes
Kicking your feet in your cute boots, swaying your hips in your high cut sparkly pink bottoms, and rolling on the stage floor has the crowd cheering in awe -- and has your boyfriend speechless
By the end of the performance, your chest heaves breathlessly as you smile and look around, Azriel standing to clap above his head for you
You wink and saunter off the stage, changing quickly to not waste any more time not by his side. When you arrive at his side again, he pulls you close, hugging you fully
"You're... really, really good at dancing..." he says sheepishly, grinning so wide that all of his perfect teeth show
You giggle at him, kissing his reddened cheek. You love when he gets all giddy and speechless for you
・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Lucien's Performance - ... Baby One More Time (Britney Spears)
It was well into your tour when Lucien was finally able to come see you
You were so excited for him to finally be able to see you perform
He loved your girlypop songs, and he thought you were so cute in your little outfits you'd shown him
But, this was the first time he would get to finally see you live
He was in a private suite, and you could see him from everywhere on the stage
You were a little nervous pre-show, as you'd heard murmurs of rain showers in the area and the arena wasn't enclosed
Nonetheless -- you were going to perform your little heart out. It was just in youe nature to do so anyway, besides the fact that your boyfriend was finally there to see you
As tough as it was, you couldn't see Lucien pre-show. You really, really wanted to -- but between warm-ups, rehearsal, and hair and makeup, you did not want to distract yourself and Lucien agreed to see you first thing afterwards
Just knowing he was there, he was in the arena was enough for you to buzz with a different kind of energy that excited you more than ever before
When assembling your outfits in order, you yanked the typical pink one off the rack. Your outfits director gave you an incredulous look, and you only smirked at her. "I think I'm ready to try out that other one you recommended a few weeks ago"
She only chucked at you, replacing it with the skimpier option for the "Baby One More Time" number. "Maybe your boyfriend should attend all your shows", she said with a wiggle of her eyebrows
As the show started, you were able to spot him immediately. With his flaming red locks and overly joyful cheers, you couldn't help but perform harder than you had before
Each outfit change had him giving you a smile and a thumbs up like a dork, but once you were nearing the end of the show, you knew the last number was what would do him in
The stage descended into darkness, and you were hurriedly changed into your final outfit. You took a steadying breath in and scurried to one end of the ascention plane, your dancers surrouding you as the opening notes of "Baby One More Time" began
The lights arose, and the crowd erupted in cheers. The stagelights bathed every crystal on your glittering Swarovski bralette in radiant essence, and you tipped the edge of your fuzzy cowgirl hat once as you began strutting down the walkway, swaying your hips in your low-rise jeans. As if on cue, thunder cracked overhead and rain begain drizzling in from above, cascading over your esposed torso. You sang along to the beat, rolling your hips and flipping your soaking locks over your shoulder. The plane you stood on rose from the stage, and your abs flexed slightly as you fought for balance on the unstable surface
Your eyes met with Lucien's -- his jaw hung, and his mouth in a dramatic "O". You couldn't help but smile through your performance, playing up the movements as the song neared its ending
The crowd roared when you finished, and you thanked everyone for coming, waving to them all and blowing a kiss to your boyfriend. He met your eyes, and pointed to the door backstage, mouthing "You. Me. Back there. You know it." With a little wink
I'll leave you to just imagine the rest (;
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Cassian's Performance - Espresso (Sabrina Carpenter)
Performing at a festival for the first time? A dream
Performing at a festival for the first time while your boyfriend was there watching you? A dream come true
Cassian was your biggest supporter in everything, especially your music career -- so when you were set to headline at one of Velaris' biggest music festivals, he was all over it
He even wore an "I <3 Y/N" shirt, but that is besides the point
You'd spent all morning getting ready with your team, the warm summer sun only encouraging you to get in the mood to perform your new song for the summer to the awaiting fans outside the doors of your backstage prep room
"Y/N! On in five!" The stage manager called. You smiled to yourself one last time, savoring these last few moments before you'd allow anyone outside your recording team and your boyfriend to hear your new hit single
When you finally took the stage, you walked back and forth, allowing the cool breeze to ruffle your long hair and cool your nerves burning through your skin. This was new for you, performing at this festival, and you worked the crowd for a little crowd interaction as you gazed to the right section where Cassian promised he'd be
The sight of his wings behind him left you smiling as he waved both hands over his head, and you send him a small wave in return. You also couldn't help but giggle at the corny tee he donned, dispite the taunts he'd recieved from Rhys and Azriel about it as the intro to "Espresso" began
As if on instinct, you began moving in time with your dancers to the song, keeping your movements small and controlled to conserve energy while singing your heart out. Nonetheless, you were performing - and the crowd was loving it, swaying and cheering along, but none of them as enthusiastic as your boyfriend
When you'd reached the end of your performance, you gave the edge of your fluffy white skirt one final toss and winked to Cassian before waving to the crowd. They erupted in applause, and Cassian cluthched his heart, pretending to faint before smiling widely at you. You giggled once more, skipping happily down the steps of the stage to the sectioned off area of the crowd to watch as the next performer geared up to take the platform. Cassian embraced you with his arms wide, lifting you high and rubbing your small back with his large hands
"Ha Ha!! Yesss that's my girl!" He praised. "You did amazing, sweetheart," he said, setting you back down and twirling you in a circle, admiring you from head to toe
"Why thank you, love bug." You say, standing on your absolute tippy-toes to press a gentle kiss to his cheek. He holds you in place with his hands wrapped around your waist, his voice a raspy whisper agaist the shell of your ear
"I'll drink your Espresso any day."
・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Tamlin's Performance - Obsessed (Olivia Rodrigo)
Tamlin had been to your shows a few times, as he was your best friend... well, you were his best friend
Sure, he was yours too, but... you'd always wanted more with him. How he didn't see that? You weren't sure
You always listened to his problems, been there for him when he needed you, and he was always there for you too
This show was an example of that. You were performing an unreleased song, one that would be a huge suprise for your whole fanbase, and as this was something you'd never done before, naturally, you were nervous
Of course you confided in your best friend about it, and he was perfect about it; he made you feel better, gave you all the courage you needed...
"What is the song about?" he'd asked you
"Well... there's this guy..." His brows had raised
"Oh?" He'd asked, suprised
"It's not about the guy, just... about his ex girlfriend, ectually. Haha," you'd explained. He only noded.
"Well that's... different. I didn't know you liked anyone." You immediately tensed, wanting to change the subject.
"It's also making me nervous, I hope people will like my aesthetic change too. I'm going with red this time... not... purple, like usual." You stammered. He nodded looking at the floor.
"What kind of red?" He asked. You looked around, eyes landing on the very thing that you two shared the most in common.
"Like, the color of the wooden panes of your fiddle."
It was after that he told you he actually wouldn't be able to come to this show. Which sucks, because you really, really wanted him to come. Little did he know, he was the guy. You liked him. He was going to come all along, why all the sudden the cold feet?
You sighed to yourself as you exited the stage, changing into the very outfit you'd hoped to be debuting for Tamlin today. As if on cue, your assistant rushes up to you with a bouquet of 12 perfect red roses, a small card in hand. She was out of breath, as were you as your atage attendants pulled fabric over your shoulders and brushed through your hair.
"This... these... he said it had to be now," she breathed. You quickly took the card from her, eyes scanning over the words.
You know I wouldn't miss this for the world. And quite frankly, I think you look beautiful in red.
You recognised the handwriting immediately, and your heart felt like it might explode out of your chest. Your assistant took the card back from you, promising to put the flowers in your dressing room as your brand new, shiny red guitar was thrust into your arms and the stage section you stood on was being lifted once more
You met the lights, the screams, the cheering -- and you looked. You searched the sides, the back, all around. You wouldn't find him, it was no use
You didn't care. He was here. He was here to see you. And he thought you were beautiful
The intro of "Obsessed" begins, and you shakily start the motions you'd practiced over and over. Dragging a sensual hand down your chest, the crowd roars and you're filled with confidence, moving to strum a few chords on your guitar. Its not long before you retire it for a microphone instead, heading toward the corner of the stage for the part of the song where you sing laying on the stage floor
It's then, when you're belting the lyrics, back arched, the you look to the side and meet those familiar emerald eyes, staring at you in shock. His strong arms are flexed over his chest, satisfaction and awe gleaming in his stare. You only smirk and continue, thrusting your hips and writing on the ground with the lyrics
As you continue your show, the crowd goes absolutely wild, and you're a panting mess by the end of it -- a panting, satisfied, excited mess
When you round the corner to your dressing room, you find him there, leaned against your vanity, hands braced against the edge of it as his lustful eyes meet yours. His roses are sat nest to him on the table, and you can't help but grin as you slowly saunter into the room, quietly closing the door behind you. He is the one to break the silence first, licking his lips as he drinks you in with his stare
"So... it seems there is something we needed to discuss, Y/N."
・゚:* ✧・゚: *
#a court of silver flames#acotar#acotar smut#lucien acotar#a court of thorns and roses#acosf#lucien x reader#acofas#a court of frost and starlight#lucien vanserra#eris vandaddy#eris vanserra#eris acotar#eris x reader#eris x oc#lucien#azriel smut#azriel#azriel acotar#azriel fanfic#rhys acotar#tamlin acotar#acowar#a court of mist and fury#a court of wings and ruin#high lord rhysand#rhysand#rhys x reader#cassian smut#cassian
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okay so i'm rereading the poppy war for the sole purpose of trying to squeeze all the chaltan content i can get out of it and my god is it delivering already
this first one is something that i completely breezed past in my first reading cause i didn't even know who tf chaghan was yet but on a reread????? GAY (pg. 226):
you're telling me that chaghan and altan just happened to be together when chaghan felt tyr's death? in the middle of the night??? mmhmm yup for sure
now as willing as i am to fully chalk this up to a late night chaltan tryst, i will be fair and admit that i'm not super clear on how exactly chaghan got the tyr info here. it kinda seems like he's doing his monthly meeting with the hexagram goddess (in the dialogue he literally says "there has been a hexagram" and then he interprets 3 things from it), but first off, it seems too coincidental for him to just happen to be doing that at the very moment that tyr dies, and also why tf is he doing it in the middle of the night?? is he just being extra dramatic and making up some "we have to do it at midnight" bullshit to see what he can get away with (a la the infamous kitay horse piss incident) or is there an in universe explanation for that that i've completely forgotten?
OR is it a secret, gayer third option: altan and chaghan were already together when he felt tyr's death, which then prompted him to convene with the goddess and get the hexagram. and we just don't see the full process or really get much of a proper explanation cause we're in altan's pov and it's all mysterious and shit at this point in the book. that's the one i'm going with and i cannot believe that this is their first scene together. the intimacy is already so palpable and we don't even know chaghan's name at this point in the book.
and then of course there's THIS (pg. 227):
absolutely fucking bonkers i'm spinning on my head
is anyone else this gentle with altan ever????? i'm genuinely asking. who else in the cike would even THINK about pulling a move like this? also the added layer of chaghan originally being next in line for commander before altan took him out to the fucking valley for THREE WHOLE DAYS and then THIS is his reaction to altan officially inheriting said title??? we know from a later conversation that chaghan has with rin (pg. 337) that he's very aware of how unprepared altan was to assume leadership over the cike, which just makes this gesture from him even more meaningful and tender. "we are yours to command. i am yours."
this next one just made me giggle and idk if it's just my brain being broken from scouring source material for gay crumbs or if it's actually intentional but (pg. 285):
i mean. i mean. if anyone knows the extent of chaltan, it's most definitely qara, and a lot of these crumbs involve her so i'm taking it as more evidence and no one can stop me
speaking of qara being an icon (pg. 317):
i actually forgot how much she's in this book i am so sorry queen
so unegen also has a strong reaction to ramsa's dialogue, but if i may be incredibly nitpicky about it, i'd argue that qara snorting implies a sense of "yeah right now that's funny", while unegen spitting out his wine implies more pure shock than anything else. i'm sure the cike have some idea about chaghan and altan's relationship going deeper than meets the eye (if it's this obvious from the crumbs we get over the span of a handful of scenes i can only imagine how sick and tired they must be after an entire year of it), but once again, qara is likely the only one who really KNOWS. for obvious reasons.
then we have the iconic dramatic entrance where chaghan is officially introduced, and even before zooming into a specific piece of it to prove my chaltan agenda, just the very existence of this scene is so fucking insane to me. rebecca could've chosen any way to properly introduce us to chaghan, and this is what she decided on. you could argue that it sets up chaghan's dramatic and obnoxiously proud personality, and that him being hurt is so we can see how it affects qara (and also just to up the tension and stakes) BUT how coincidental that on top of achieving all that character and narrative stuff, it also succeeds in showing us a completely different side to altan. one that is specifically brought about by chaghan.
would altan rush out into a sea of federation soldiers to help any other member of the cike? yes. but rebecca chose to show him helping THIS member of the cike. in THIS dramatic of a fashion (and it's literally on a horse like that is so fractured fairytale romance of her actually). and it's also the aftermath that really clues us into something deeper between him and chaghan in particular (pg. 373):
along with qara, who is SOUL BONDED TO CHAGHAN BY THE WAY, altan is screaming at him for being reckless and how he could've gotten himself killed. intentionally or not, rebecca is clearly aligning altan and qara here, and i LOVE how it's shown in the way their dialogue is formatted. you don't even know who is saying which fragment. they are one in the same when it comes to the level in which they care about chaghan's wellbeing. and also when it comes to yelling at him for being an idiot! and if that's not love then idk what is
#more to come#i'm so obsessed with these two it's such an issue#sorry for the bad photos too i tried my best but i have horrible lighting everywhere#the poppy war#altan trengsin#chaghan suren#qara suren#chaltan
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nosramus's relationship headcanons, maybe? 🫶 idk if you write for them, but if not, ok!!
but speaking sincerely with all my heart; i've been following your blog for a while, and i'll tell you-- i sincerely love your writing, like really - very really !! i giggle and do 10 spins in my room when you post about my favorite characters (or characters i don't even know, 🤭����) maybe that sounds not honest ((i don't even know)), but i really mean it.
AND
hope you have a good night/or day (or whatever time is) !!!!!!!!!!
Thank you so so much!!! That's so sweet of you to say and I'm so glad you enjoy my works aaaaa ;w; it means a lot!!
I hope you have a great day/night yourself and that these are good <3
---
🤍 Immortality is both a blessing and a curse, Nosramus has found. Though she finds enjoyment and purpose in her studies and in the mundanity of life, even within the dungeons of Fear and Hunger, this has also led her to a life of loneliness. Many days spent with only herself for company. Her guard is there, of course, but he's not really much for company. It's even manageable most days. But the longer the future stretches out in front of her, the more the chasm in her heart where others had once touched deepens and darkens further.
💛 Such isolation gives her cause to look into different areas of study - such as The Soul. Everyone is born under a specific Soul type that will shape who they are and how their life will play out. Less understood, however, is that concept of a Soul Mate. The idea of one Soul bearer having one (or more) Souls that are naturally attracted or drawn toward one particular Soul type or even particular individual that bears a particular Soul type that seems to inherently click with another's. Once, she had thought she found them. But, she was wrong. She was betrayed and forgotten. In the end, they were the worse for it and Nosramus, in the grand scheme of things, was far better off. Still, she was left scarred by deception. To be alone was better than being hurt again in such a way. It was better for a long, long time. But now, the darkness and isolation of the catacombs have become almost too much to bear. She can feel her Soul call out for the touch of another.
🤍 Brave adventurer, what is it you seek? Her, perhaps unknowingly…? Why else could Nosramus feel you within the halls? Your footfalls echoing through her head, the brightness of your spirit felt pulsing in her own Soul. A feel of giddiness makes her entire body shake. She can't concentrate on her studies. She can't even hold a cup of tea steady without shaking. She sees flashes of you in her enlightened mind's eye. So desperate is Nosramus to see you in the flesh. Is this what it feels like to meet your one and only? A part of Sylvian's design perhaps. The anticipation and impending doom of meeting who you are meant to be one with. Nosramus can't help to distract herself much longer, nearly running from her laboratory as she feels you enter the mines.
💛 Don't be afraid. She can see you from the shadows. She will wait as long as you need to step into the light and see her. Nosramus tries to keep her smile from widening too greatly. She introduces herself. Tries to ignore the burning sensation in her very being. Extends a hand out to you and tells you the kettles on. Care for a cup of tea? She smiles even as you hesitate. Of course you're hesitant, poor thing. All alone in such a place without her. How did you ever survive? When your hand slips into hers, Nosramus is nearly set ablaze from the inside-out. Oh, yes, she thinks she'll keep you.
🤍 As a show of good faith, Nosramus offers you to partake in her potions and peruse her tomes. Not like you'll be leaving with them. The home she's made feels so much more alive with you inside it. Like you were always meant to be here. Your voice is music to her ears. She implores you - why are you here, where are you from, who have you left behind, what do you love, what do you despise, what are your dreams and wishes. She sprawls down notes when she gets a moment between preparing your tea. Just the beginning of her study of you. When she sets your cup in front of you, she makes a show of giving her own a hearty sip. And by the time you've realized what's happened, you can barely keep your head up. Poor dear.
💛 You must understand. Or, you will understand, eventually. Nosramus has been burned before. She wants to trust you, but can't quite yet. But, it's okay, pet. She will take care of you while you learn how much your meant to be. She can hardly be near you without touching you - holding your hand, stroking the top of your head, pressing soft kisses across your face. When she must rip herself away from you, her guard will watch over you. One day, you'll be free to be lucid when kept in her quarters, but not yet. She must show you that your Souls are meant to be one. She cannot wait for the day that Sylvian blesses your union and you finally do become One.
#yandere x reader#yandere fear & hunger#yandere fear and hunger#fear and hunger x reader#fear & hunger x reader#yandere Nosramus#yandere nosramus x reader#nosramus x reader#tw drugging#forced drugging#noncon drugging#yandere#yandere imagines#yandere scenarios#yandere headcanons#x reader
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fav ship / character and least fav ship / character? 🙏🙏🙏
favorite ship:
who couldve seen this coming?/j
read more as it's just me taking any excuse to yap BDJD
honestly, how talk abt them to friends sometimes arent my actual characterizations of their dynamic/relationship. But really they're spinning in my head like a microwave everyday, so my interpretation of them of them generally change depending on settings, aus, or just my mood.
The thing that draws me to them is the fact that Fanny seems like a loyal solider(quite literally), but to where she'd definitely throw herself off a cliff for her leader/command(for rachel only really.) Meanwhile Rachel is pretty oblivious to the length Fanny would go for her – and visa versa. They're devoted to each other, yet are scared to repair their fractured friendship at the same time(mostly on fanny's side).
Honestly idk how to explain it xjsb
also the fact Fanny was Rachel's runner up for her GOT fuels me everyday, cause besides this moment, we don't really get too many moments where rachel isn't pissed at fanny for reasons.
could just be her being harsh as it comes with a leader, cause welp, fanny does fuck up a lot. But with these interactions you'd think Rachel wouldve considered ANYBODY else – besides nigel – for her second choice. so 1000000000% rachel had to have ALOT of trust in Fanny to place her as a second in command of an entire global organization, despite her trackrecord of botched missions(which, honestly i believe is why Nigel had been Rachel's first choice, because while nigel had seen mostly sucess in his teams' mission, fanny had gotten the short end of the stick and just faces failure after failure from what we've seen.)
uhhh anyways!! Fanny fell first(unknowingly) amd by the time they become teenagers, Rachel ends up falling harder and depressingly misses her GOT while she's suffering in TND orientation.
TLDR: a shitty anaylsis(barely) on how loyal moonbabes are to one another and they have trust!! I'm not normal about them
If ur curious abt my ranking for ships than here ya go:
1. Moonbabes
2. Lizzie/10
3. Wally/Kuki
4. Kuki/Fanny(or alternatively; Fanny/Kuki/Rachel)
Favorite character?
It's technically split down the middle between Rachel and Fanny, but my focus usually flipflops. So this week we got:
1. Rachel
2. Fanny
3. Chad
4. Cree
5. Negative 362 and Negative 86
Rachel: for reasons, honestly, I loved her since i was a kid. There's a lot to disect about her, and i love that, love her position, her personality, the kind of the role she plays, etc etc idk how to explain any of jt, or the specfics so you get this short ass summary instead
-also headcanon: her relationship with Harvey is rather strained, so Rachel tries to make it up to him by favoring him when it comes to mission assignments when he joined the KND, he also struggles to get her approval by completing them
Fanny: ashamed to admit, i cannot sit through a fanny episode withoht needing to pause and pace around – but like rachel, i like pretty much everything about her, she's interesing to disect as so much of her background is left up for interpretation. Like why did ahe join ths decommissioning squad? Why is she the way she is? Because of the decom squad or her time as a nurse, or just life in general bxns?
-headcanon: Her real name is Francine, and Fanny's a nickname because she thought it sounded less mature and didnt put too much thought in it's meaning in Ireland cuz she didnt live there that long (also her mother didnt have the heart to sit her down and explain it to her at her young age)
other global ops dont bat an eye to it, unfortunately Irish operatives cringe everytime they hear her name.
3. Chad is a loser. A failure. And i love him for that/j but actually, his entire character is interesting, and so much is left in the air for me to dig my teeth into and make up shit for him. One major headcanon i've convinced myself of for him is that he's related to rachel/harvey (cousins???)
-another hc: he's on the aromatic spectrum(shout to friend Amber for the idea cmdb)
4. Cree love her. I can forgive a woman of her crimes always xmsn one reason she's high up on the my list this week is she's interesting(duh), but like all the others she has so much character/info on her but little bits not filled to where i can just make up shit- canonically, i love her role, hsr character, she's an amazing villian/antagonist steals the show everytime - i'd pay warburton with my own money to write what she was like as a KND operative, she is quite skilled from the bits we've witnessed in flashbacks and in the present. One thing that runs through my mind is that Warburton in a Q&A, hinted that Cree probably wouldnt have scouted by the TND, that she was already trekking on a dark path while in the KND. BSJDB
-Headcanon: her and chad and steve have nights where they just hangs out and they watch stuff on Adult Swim. She probably likes South park
5. -362 and -86, got nothing to abt thene beyond they're silly(and possibly evil)
Least favorite Character/Ship
To be honest, i got no hate towards any of the characters in KND, they're all really interesting in their own way.
If i had make a tier list tho-
He'd be at the bottom. Only because he'd definitely call me a slur/j
And for ships, i'm not a multi shipper but i'm neutral to most.
tho fanny x a man will kill me, Cuz man, idk how you can look me straight in the eyes and tell me she's not lesbian,
Just LOOK AT HER
-
Thank you for the ask!!
#knd#kids next door#moonbabes#cree lincoln#chad dickson#rachel mckenzie#fanny fulbright#six's thingies
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Never got to share some of my headcanons for the hfr characters but here we go:
Chai is a blind mf (near-sighted) and needs glasses. Like, right now.
I don’t really know what glasses to give him though. Maybe like John Johanas has. Those could probably suit him.
Korsica is sporty, without a doubt, all about that daily exercise and healthy nutritious diet. What sport would she do though? I think boxing, like with Macaron, would probably suit her, yet I’d also think of kickboxing and maybe some jogging on the side.
On that note, Chai seems extremely flexible, almost if not outright gymnast levels. It remains a mystery for how long Chai had his right arm the way it was before the implant. Maybe he had it like that since he was a baby, but I can imagine him somehow injuring it in his early years, and it was just so severe that he couldn’t get its fine motor skills back. Like, maybe Chai has a degenerative disease that either runs in the family or only affected him due to him being a gymnast.
Or he’s just that naturally flexible and jumpy idk
Another headcanon for Korsica (me fine woman) is that she actually used to play drums and it’s not just a motive that she has in the game with her batons. Maybe she was part of the school orchestra and would only play simple tunes in there, while actually being good enough to pop off any minute. I instantly remember that video “When you’re overqualified for the job” when I think about it.
If the groups were to start a band, then Macaron would def be a piano guy and Peppermint the bass girly.
OKAY i'm gonna go down the headcanon list ting bc i love your takes and i want to respond to all of them properly TEE HEE
would NEVER have thought chai to be blind or in need of glasses tbh, though i'm here for it!! i personally think he would've been more far sighted bc of his ability to snatch onto magnets and grab enemies and stuff... (the thought of him squinting the entire game and hitting any moving robot looking blobs in his field of vision is pretty funny though tbh LOL) ... also i looked up john johanas and it's been a hot minute since i've booted up the game but i SWEAR the ones with the thick black frames are an actual pair of glasses you can get in the shop for chai and i am SOOO doodling that if i have the time
korsica is absolutely sporty. proof: sporty fit in shop. also she's head of security she literally HAS to stay in shape to spin that thang around. (also idk if it's just me but it's implied her batons are pretty heavy bc there's this one specific scene during her boss fight when the game is like "okay scratch parrying everything!" where she strains JUST a little bit to get into the spinning motion so she is SOOOOO absolutely muscular). ALSO did not think about korsica and macaron sparring!! macaron doesn't seem like the type to spar at his age LOL... but maybe he'd be up for it occasionally post game :0!!
i definitely think he would've tried to stay limber growing up all things considered, he has WAYYY too much stamina if he can beat up all those robots LOL but now that you mention it, he DID practically fold in half at the very end of the first stage... BUT i personally hc he has monoplegia as a result of an accident when he was really young as opposed to something he was born with. i'm by no means a medical expert, but it sounds... medically inaccurate for a degenerative muscle disease to stay in one arm? (if you ask me tho, i think he would have a brachial plexus birth injury IF he were to be born with it, but again) take that with a fistful of salt, i'm not a doctor and i don't know shit
i don't have much to say for the last two, i agree with you for the most part BWAHGAHGW i love the idea that if someone asked korsica about why she chose the weapons she chose, she'd just say something like "hitting drums, hitting people. same difference." and shrug BWAHWBJAHGSHJF
#ask#answer#text post#hi fi rush#hi-fi rush#hi fi rush chai#hi fi rush korsica#hi fi rush macaron#headcanons#AHRGSKHRGSRAJHR i love hi fi rush ask me more things#i love yapping
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Going in the post FNAF6 events, is there any other notable changes of note in this AU? Like changes to the games before Security Breach, different animatronics, etc, or is it pretty much one to one otherwise?
Okay, so this is where my rewrite starts to become a little...weirder than usual since I changed a LOT about post FNAF 6, (although believe me the security breach part will need its own post!) Reminder that this is still very much a work in progress, I haven't fully finished thinking the whole thing out yet, so as time goes on there is a possibility of lore updates or changes, answers below as usual!
Well for FNAF UCN, I know there's people who think that Andrew (i don't actually know who this is, but it's some kid from the books) is 'The One You Should Not Have Killed'/TOYSNHK, but lowkey i think that's stupid and I have decided to not include him. As I've said plenty of times before this rewrite does not include ANYTHING from the books (okay I lied there's a handful of things from the books that I've altered to fit into my story because I like the idea of it, but I'll list ALL the changes of the rewrite in another post if people are interested!)
Cassidy is TOYSNHK. Old Man Consequences is Henry, I guess. And yes, UCN is Afton's afterlife prison created by Cassidy, but it's not his real afterlife destination. He probably could've been able to escape sooner it had it not been for Cassidy constantly torturing him. And also Afton comes back I guess. Besides that everything is the same! (Mostly because, does this game really matter? It's basically just a spin off)
Anyways onto Help Wanted, I guess the only changes are just handfuls!
As we know in canon, Fazbear Ent. hired Silver Parasol Games to create a game trivializing and mocking the company's past to make a quick buck and probably to get people off their back about it. However an incident involving a beta tester named Jeremy (I'll get back to that in a sec) caused production of the game to halt, and development of the game was sent to another unknown company (presumably Fazbear Ent. Maybe?) But I'm altering some of that.
Silver Parasol Games does not exist in my rewrite. Instead the development company working on the game is a branch of the Fazbear Ent. Company, mostly because I feel like it makes sense for this moronic business to employ their own workers to do stuff for them at a cheaper rate than actually pay another studio more money to get things done. While the incident with Jeremy still occurred, the game halted production because Fazbear Ent. had to deal with the legal issues cause yk...one of your employees disfigured himself and probably a few people saw that. And after that was dealt with (rather swiftly, they probably bribed a few people here and there) the game production continued.
As for tape girl in this rewrite, uh...idk, I made her Vanessa/Vanny. I know there's probably some evidence out there that is like "but they're two different people you idiot !!" And yeah I'm sure they probably are but whatever, this rewrite has way too many characters and I'm not dealing with that. I felt like it didn't make sense for Tape Girl to not deal with Glitchtrap herself instead of getting the player to do it themselves. Like you said you knew a way to get rid of him, so...why didn't you do it earlier?? Anyways the way I'm changing Tape Girl and her lore is gonna be weird to explain, but that's for me to refine later in life!
Anyways, back to Jeremy, I made the choice to not make him Jeremy Fitzgerald, because 1. I feel bad for the poor dude already, he already lost half his head, does he need to lose his whole face too?? 2. Jeremy in HW isn't too important anyway, so no point in bringing Jeremy back just to kill him off (I mean J. Fitzgerald isn't that important either, but 🤷🤷) and 3. He would be too fucking old for this! During 1983 he was about 15-16 years old, and presuming HW takes place around modern time, he'd probably be in his 40s or 50s I think (maybe 60s idk, there's a reason it's my least favorite subject 💀💀) and like what the hell would he be doing there? Senior citizen ass go to the retirement home bro. And also who the hell would work AGAIN for the company who covered up the time you got your BRAIN BIT OFF by one of their robots??
And yeah Glitchtrap = William Afton. However, he STILL doesn't have any memories of his life as William (and now, he only barely remembers Mike and Henry, his strongest memories are when he was Springtrap and Scraptrap) when he escaped the UCN afterlife prison created by Cassidy, he managed to find out how much things have changed in the company, and more importantly he found out about the game they were developing.
He still wanted to have an immortal life (cause he also vaguely remembers wanting to live longer from when he was still working on reviving Evan, and his 'brain' scrambled it into him wanting to live FOREVER, no dead son here!) And he was like, "well, I guess coming back as a digital entity would be awesome!" But remember there's still a chance of him being fully deleted forever as explained by Tape Girl, so his plan is to infect people with his virus to use them as vessels to live in the real world again (and maybe collect remnant? Idk, this is still an idea I'm debating on keeping in this part, will likely get dropped though.)
(Also, I guess Special Delivery can stay the same in my re-imagining, not much to change about it and I like the Vanny lore!)
Again, I'm still working out the kinks here. This will probably be subjected to change if it calls for it! Any questions, let me know!
#fnaf#five nights at freddys#five nights at freddy's#five night's at freddy's#fnaf lore#fnaf reimagining#fnaf rewrite#rewrite#fnaf au#re-imagining#william afton#vanny fnaf#vanessa fnaf#tape girl fnaf#help wanted fnaf#fnaf ucn#ultimate custom night
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alsooo list of things that have been making rounds inside my head for a while now:
1. ear ice pick
2. nostril spinning saw rod
3. the phrase "I'll stop stabbing when you stop screaming" bc it's kinda funny and I think I saw it on some Riddler fanart ??
4. the phrase "They'll keep finding your body for three months. You'll be alive for at least two of them." bc it's cool even if it sounds kinda edgy ykwim... it's from a post on here, I have it on my blag but I don't wanna look for it rn
5. the phrase "Mary pays in blood" which just sorta manifested into my brain one day & IDK if I saw it somewhere and then forgot WHERE I saw it but ya. And it's really kinda annoying me cause like who is Mary and what is she paying for and why does it have to be in blood.... Google is not telling me.
6. Off of that 👆 I had an idea of "Mary" (not 2 be confused w/ the Mary I just posted abt lol) being a girl who lives in a single very white room with a bed, a huge TV on the wall and the remote for said TV. The gist of it is that you start each "story" by flipping thru the channels and selecting one, but you are never the "true" protagonist in any of them. I was kinda stressing about having to forcefully come up w/ more than one short story for a single game cause my brain is Not That Big, but then I thought it'd be nice to just like. Take an existing side chara from an "existing" story (AKA one that I didn't force) and then do it from their POV if that makes senseeee.... just as a compilation/anthology thing maybe
7. the possum girl one that's a lot more about exploration and mystery-solving ETC but I think I already posted abt that one and the only thing I've added to it/expanded on is the girl's parents bc they are really funny n cute to me. & Also there's a guy with a flower shop now. & his sister owns a fashion boutique. And I wanna put a butcher shop in there as well cause when I go to the one near my house I rly like looking at the different signs they have around n stuff (those ones like "if you want a credit go to the bank‼️")
8. that one comic I made and then left half-finished (LOL) about my two loser guy OCs being literally physically incapable of getting bitches (gender neutral) and being absolutely COWARDLY about it was so so funny to me I keep thinking about them and about what other Situations I can toss em in
9. throat plumbing
10. one person getting stitched (like, physically and also in strange ways/places) to another except said other person is very much not into it. to say the least. kinda like human centipede but if it was two people and one of them was the one who made it happen.
11. open-wound stabbing which I think is pretty self explanatory but I started thinking about it more recently when I saw one of those videos where they've got like a bunch of balloons inside each other and then pop em by layers. which is not really similar to what I have in mind but it's what caused it.
12. kinda related to that 👆: the way blood pools inside wounds like I love splatter but there is something SO nice about seeing it come out slowly ykwim...
unlucky 13. kissing and being in love and hugging and kissing forever and ever AMEN🩷
#diary#oc talk#I always feel so edgy when I talk about stuff like this like I have to put a disclaimer that says ''I prommy I'm normal abt other ppl's#boundaries'' yk...#oc: mary#oc: paula#oc: alice#oc: dom
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Okay I love seeing inside people’s brains when it comes to movies because it’s like a little peek into someone’s soul so let’s go for 27, 39 and 40 ! (Sets of threes are satisfying?)
Oh my god I love it too, that's probably why my answers are so long-winded with these. It's also fun to talk about movies with people! I don't have many people in my outside of tumblr life who watch movies as much as me, or the same types of movies, so it's fun to talk about it here, because I've been asked. Also, absolutely sets of three are satisfying, three is actually my lucky number too, so I always take it as a sign 🥰
27. are you enjoying the remaking of old films or do we need to get creative and do something new?
(So sorry, I can't shut up about this topic and I'm gonna get soapboxey)
Ugh, I am definitely not. I think there are exceptions, ones that have turned out great, but I think those are ones that truly took the love people had for the original and spun it totally new and creative way (which isn't a lot of them) or they're just totally new stories but in the same universe as a franchise (the new star wars movies, Alien Romulus, etc.)
But like, really, I hate it. SO MUCH. My husband has had to listen to this rant for months, a year, idk. I've actually discussed this with a few people, but I think that's why Stranger Things did and does so well. The Duffers took a lot of inspiration from movies and shows and just the era in general of the 80s and there are so many subtle and not so subtle hints to these and they just do it so well...like that's why people like it. It's nostalgic and reminds us of those movies but it's a totally new story. A totally new concept. And I just wish more writers and more production companies understood this.
It's a HUGE thing I want to do with my own writing, particularly my screenplays. Like, I love romantic comedies, I miss the 80s, 90s, and early 2000s rom coms - BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE SHOULD JUST REMAKE THEM. Why do we love them? What can I put in my movie that makes you nostalgic for those great films, but is totally new? I think that's also why Anyone But You did so well. Number one, it got a theater production budget, not a straight to streaming budget - which isn't that crazy of a difference nowadays, I'm sure - but for a rom com, it is, and it's a big deal. Plus the marketing, the time, the resources, there's just more of it. But, it also did so well because people could go see it in a theater, and subconsciously, I think this made everyone feel nostalgic for the rom com blockbuster days. We used to see rom coms in theaters guys, and now, now we get straight to streaming that are, let's be honest, hallmark rom coms. WE NEED NEW STORIES. WE NEED BIGGER BUDGETS!
This is actually why I deleted a bunch of the fics I was gonna write off of my "She's Seen All The Classics" masterlist. I think the ideas I had for those fics are actually great opportunities to spin classics on their head for a real screenplay. There's one I'm particularly excited for and I'm gonna start officially writing the screenplay for soon, but it was my Dirty Dancing/Footloose fic. I'd literally protest if they remade Dirty Dancing, but my screenplay is going to be a major homage to it, but a totally new storyline.
Anyways, long story short - no. I'm not enjoying it.
39. in your opinion what is the most underrated movie?
Oooo...okay. I'm gonna list a couple, and while they're fairly popular, I just don't hear people talking about them as often, and I think they are fantastic films.
"DOPE", "The Burbs", "Someone Great", "Yesterday", "Booksmart" and "What If"
40. a film you think everyone should see at least once
Oh my god this is so hard...um....
OH my god how do I answer this?
Maybe the movie "About Time"? I just think there's a lot of lessons to be learned from it, but it's also a sweet rom com that I think is a bit underrated?
🤓 ask me a movie question!
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As the Iron Heart
NOTES: I've been playing a DnD campaign for the last 3 years, this is my fica about my character backstory and situations that were left... for the imagination. Dnd usually is a way to cope with my stresses. So I had 2 options, develop maladaptive daydreaming, or imagining and writing fics, now we get this :D
[P.S sorry if english bad, me no english good sometimes]
Rated: Mature, maybe, idk, 16+ just to be sure
TW: trauma, loss, child death (kinda descriptive), grief, some descriptions of blood and wounds, be aware!
Ch 1. Wounded Friend
"Aida..?" A male voice calls. Its a deep voice, strangely sweet for how low it goes. Sunddenly a warm touch on the shoulder. "Aida, are you good?". It calls again.
It's a friendly touch, only the tips of large fingers, as if it was afraid of the proximity with her shoulder.
Only one of her eyes opens, a mossy green iris reflecting the cold sky, her left eye is covered by a thin piece of cloth wrapped around her head, the cotton fabric has been dazzled with medical oils. That's not the first time she senses these aromas. They were a common fragance through her lessons in herbology. Her Ma made sure to teach her every little detail about it. "Magic can heal, yes, but treating an infection or desease in traditional ways are necessary in such a small village. We don't have many healers, it takes one undead's bite to stop someone from recovering magically". Aida heard this lesson at thirteen years old.
She tries to sit up and Marshall got her back, her head still spins and the deep cuts on her face keep pulsating painfully.
"What.. where are the others?" She says, her voice is fragile. "Marshall, are they-"
"They are alright. Don't worry" he responds fast, then a quiet laugh. "You try acting all tough, but as soon as your patrol goes wrong, you ask for the others before looking at yourself. You should respect your limits more." He crosses his arms on hid chest.
"For real? You'll give me fucking life advises right now?" A sarcastic breath comes out. "You're unbelievable, Marsh."
He caress her back as she holds the bedsheets a little tighter. She knows she fucked up this time. She looks back at the male figure next to her. A human male with a full dark-brown beard, an earring on the right ear, shaved head. Dark circles around his eyes, probably from taking care of the village affairs.
"Joy was caring you back, you know?"
"I didn't asked to be brought back, did I?" Marshall looks at her, ready to ask if she feels better.
"Don't." Her tone is agressive, but he knows her too well to know why. "Just leave me here a while, with my sad ass and my regrets and.... fuck" tears are rolling down her cheeks, but she is inconsolable. Without Elryn and Brie, it was hard to do anything about her, really.
"You want to talk about-"
"I said don't" her tone is firm while interrupting him. She looks back at her hands, her vision blurried from the tears. "It was that bad..?" She holds the bedsheets once more, looking now through the window, seeing her reflection.
She also has dark circles, but for a different reasons. Living on a small village next to the montains can be dangerous, so everyone has a role in taking care of Ick Mak, but Aida took things a step too far. She lost control over her patrols, getting to the forest way more then it was recommended. Foul creatures lured on those woods, Crimson marked ones. One bite or scratch can turn you into a monster. Call it a curse, a disease, or a punishment, it was a death sentence. It was what took Brie from her. A small, crystal like wound that never heals. It gives an intoxicating fever and a rough pain throughout the body.
The crimson Mark.
Aida still remember the smell. Burned flesh mixed with a nausiating blood scent. "It" was not her daughter. Not her precious little Ladybug, not her moon and stars. It wasn't Brie, it couldn't. She was fine, she didn't get a scratch or a bite, how did it happened? How? She wasn't there when Brie was forced to stay in the house, well aware of jer fate. It's all her fault.
"Your mother did a fine job with the surture, if that's what you want to ask. Tho it will be a large scar." He knows she can take the news about her disfigured face.
"It came from the old mine, used to be a montain lion, large mark on its back, probably level 2 infection." Her tone is professional now, the analysis of a specialist that dedicated years of patrols to identify and kill these beasts. Her favorite prey, as if killing one by one would vengence her late daughter.
He sighs, there she is, this version that can only talk in ranger language. The one shifting her feeling for a hunt, for revange.
"We'll keep an eye out, it might be close still." He gives her shoulder a thigh squeeze. "You better get your ass better before even thinking about it"
"Even if I wanted to, you, Joy and Dhalia would probably stop me anyway, bunch of pebbles in my shoes" as snarky as she sounds, he knows its just a deflection.
If it was any one of them getting as badly hurt as she got, Aida would've been carrying them across the contient to save them. She made a promise after all.
Elryn was her promise, her late husband. Marshall was Brie's blessed guardian if, heavens forbid, something happened to her parents. Elryn's death was Aida's promise, Ick Mak would remain intact, it would grow and prosper as long as Aida could be responsible for it, sharing its tasks with her folks and friends alike.
She still takes care of her home, in a distant and self deprecating way, but deep down she couldn't stop carrying about Ick Mak.
As the silence settled between them, Aida looks back at Marshall, face still swollen from tears and the new wound she got. From how much she was hurt in body and soul, she kept a subtle smile, deep down, even if it looked like she wanted to die or didn't care for herself, she was glad to be breathing. Even if it stings her lungs to remember the pain of loosing, she wanted to be there.
"I'll get some sleep, can you give our little green guy a 'thank you' kiss?" Looking at her thay way, for a second, Marshall saw the old Aida. His best friend's wife, his partner in drink and games. The way she played with her words to make everyone unconfortably laugh with cheeks burning from her direct and even flirtatious tone.
"Maybe you could return the favor, with a beer at the Sleeping Oak"
"Sure, then I'll give him a kissy kissy from saving the damsel in distress" she laughs.
"Don't you mean rag in distress" he laughs back.
"Pardon my Elvish, but pukta nornye" She smiles faking being offended.
As he stands up from the chair next to the bed, he wraps his arm next to her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze.
"We are glad you're here."
Her lips curls on a subtle smile, it's an akward one. She is and is not happy at the same time. To live in constant pain is a kind of hell on itself. Marshall waves her a quick goodbye before closing the door on the infermary room of Aida's house.
Her chest feels heavy again, being alone and quiet is an open invitation for her mind to linger deeper into her sorrow.
Voices call her out for her faults, the blame is umberable. A deep breath and her cold persona comes back.
She stands up, her head spins with the sudden motion. She gets a mirror next to the medical cabinet. Untying her bandages, Aida takes a close look at the looking glass. Her dark circles seems bigger and more tired than she remembered, her mossy green eye takes notice of its pair, closed and badly bruised. Her skin is colored with a sickned red from the bottom of her jaw, going on a diagonal, passing on her nose bridge to her forehead getting really close to her right eyebrow, spliting in an Y shape from the cheek to her left eyebrow. How lucky, her left eye is swollen shut, but she can see the light through her eyelids.
The other scar running through her lips is long, but it didn't got swollen or form a keloid. It's just a red line across her smile. a present gifted by the wild animal. Her eye was way worst in comparison.
A mess. A lost kid in the woods, trying to hunt when clearly she was the prey. She remembers bits and pieces, after getting the creature to backoff using a thorn growth spell, two of the other rangers in patrol saw her almost passing out near the south river. Joy quickly meet her and carried her, she was so small compared to him, a 6.8ft half-orc with dark green skin, large thusks going over his top lip, brown eyes, a full dark, almost black beard and pointy ears.
She can't figure out what he whispered to her, but she was sure it was a worried pray for the gods. He's embrace was strong and fearful, he didn't want to see her loose herself like that, not by this level of self destruction.
"I'm here" she whispers, recolecting the words of that big half-orc, remembering how sad Joy got seeing her, his friend, badly injuried.
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thanks if you read it!
#dnd#dnd character#oc fanfiction#dnd oc#my ocs#original character#dnd fanfiction#dungeons and dragons#dnd5e
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Well, since you asked, what sorts of fantasies/scenes/ideas would you like to do in the coming year?
OKIES! I have had time to think about it! Thank you Miss for asking and I hope you know this isn't like a checklist! Don't feel like you need to do all these okay!
Also I am kinda on the spot! Like the old ones were things I dreamt about for years or organically had that welling I WANT THAT reaction! I feel like I'm sort of just racking my brain for these <3 you did too good a job, Miss! I want for nothing because you made my dreams come true <3
Buuut here are some ideas! Summoning Shenanigans - I still want a "summoned to a hotel room" style thing where a trigger (whether text message or time based) has me glide from my room while bespelled and unaware of where I am going but knowing I am supposed to go there. The whole Summoning skill in Vampire: The Masquerade has imprinted on my weak and susceptible mind! (Though maybe if we had joining rooms there could be a kind of "leave the window open" sort of thing? IDK vampire scenes and me are just always gonna be a thing!)
Make-up scene - A looong while ago Dawn did this for Sleepyhead:
it was back when we were actually spending money on our Sephora products and trying to learn things-- something which tapered off a bunch the past couple years--
2019-2021 era Camdawn was still getting used to being trans and overcompensated our gender performance.
But I wanna be prettied up. I think we did something like this during Charmed 2023? I vaguely recall starring blankly at my reflection but that may have been a hair brushing thing?
Either way I just wanna get pampered up and made pretty just one time in my life. I dunno why but that fantasy always gets me. When I'm at the salon getting my hair dried in that helmet thing I like to imagine myself being brainwashed. It's just a nice lil' personal indulgence.
Though this may be best saved until after COVID anyway.
Hair Style stuff? - Daja once had a thing about "The Cammie is stored in the hair, right? So what happens if I style your hair?" and we play a lil' with hair brushing and stuff but I like the idea of being braided into obedience or having a bun that when released will do something. It's a tough one because of how our brain works but I really like the idea of hair style control. It hits the buttons from the previous one but in a much more personal and lovely way <3
Singing/Dancing Fantasy - I remember there was once a "musical episode" of a TTRPG I did and I can't remember if I was able to sing along with it or not but I like the idea of just being under a spell or compulsion that makes it so I can only interact in musical <3 it is silly and I love silly!
Curious concepts which aren't fantasies but popped in our head while thinking of answers here:
Silly Request - I'll be wearing my Hypnotist/Switch/Hypnotee pin again at Charmed! I kinda wanna have a thing where if I forget to switch it and someone I love reaches in and spins it to hypnotee I just drop instantly (provided that it's safe to do so)
Curiosity/Amnesia'y thingy??? - So like--- I OFTEN have moments where I push stuff out of head and out of mind but don't commit to deleting it-- like I delete a lot of stuff and it upsets me when I go scratching that itch and find it's not there but like y'all underestimate how much I search through old photos, journals, videos and such to satiate an impulse.
It'd be nice to have a trap for myself in there like a video or audio or word file that draws attention and I click it and it hypnotizes me and I forget about it and then rediscover it again someday.
Like I'm thinking of it as some kind of emergency "feel better" spell from me to me and have considered doing it a few times or writing a story about it. Like this isn't something I want done for me, more a concept I've been thinking about and a good use of my proclivity for hypnotic amnesia <3
Elevator thing - So like I don't talk a bunch about the specifics of my past life because the people involved can't consent to my sharing but I did do hypnosis in the before times. There was one scene born from an elevator at a convention in Chicago that had this soothing LED color pattern and like--- I kinda wanna make a memory like that again. There are three big scene memories I can think of from my past life and I think understanding which of those I remember super fondly would help craft new scenes. One was watching snow fall, one was in a hot tub and the other was the elevator thing. I think it's just a mix of the intimate, unexpected and situational elements-- like they were all during times which were heightened level of Special Moment and built upon that high-- it's why Fountain Scene in October was so important to me!
I hope that helps! It's hard to explain when I refuse to be specific!
-
ANYWAYS! I'll keep thinking!
For now! I hope the elevator thing explains what makes a scene work for me and know VAMPIRE STUFF ALWAYS WORKS <3
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At least there's tomorrow. And the rest of today... Last night was fine but not really.... I'm upset. I'm grateful to have ANYBODY in my corner including online amazing friends who truly are my biggest hope/support. I should have higher standards for who I let in irl... but have you ever been so sad and needed more than a call? Something not even a hotline could be equipped to handle? I didn't want a stranger to talk to. I needed to know the person talking to me loved me and cared. I needed someone who could help me feel seen by physically looking back at me. I've been very unwell and stuck with limited support irl. I'm going to talk about how I go about surviving it under here. Read with caution idk some sensitive topics are mentioned
Last night he couldn't grab my stun gun to take it away. Kept telling me to give it to him so that i don't use it (why would I need to use it? you're probably wondering). I had to remove it from my purse and onto my body to keep it (he still tries to grab it anyways, wtf). I made the totally genius suggestion that if he didn't want to be stunned then he could try keeping hands to himself. I flash it. He gets pouty.
Still, he continues to act in ways that make me feel unsafe, with little things like where he decides to park and how. Like taking up 5 spots sideways for no reason and when I ask why he turns and almost yells to say "because they're all MINE!". And like how he goes over the reflective pavement markers in the middle of the road and asks if he made me scared, then holds his hand out in front of me (you know the one that probably should be on the wheel) saying "here grab it and hold tight and never let go" "ask me to stay and I will".
He always does this thing where if I disagree to physicality then he wants to promote a sense of danger so that I cling to him anyways :) i tell him it makes me uncomfortable again.
I am so desperate for a late night distraction that I overlook this to try and be grateful for his company and time. It isn't as bad as being left alone admittedly. It sucks to say but it's real.
He says he wants to go for a walk by a lake in the middle of the night. I'm freezing as is but okay I guess. He puts it in his gps and starts driving.
Before heading out of the car he drinks my meal replacement then says he doesn't like it. This is after I say of course he can have the rest of it in spite of me not actually eating enough calories to sustain myself as is. I want to thank him and show him appreciation for his company somehow and my conversation isn't enough.
Out by the water I ask if he's cold in his shirt. I'm shivering in my blanket that i wear like armor. It makes me feel untouchable knowing he can't access my bare skin.
He says yes he is cold and then goes on about how his plan was for me to hug him to keep him warm. I said wtf no and had to keep MOVING otherwise he tries to get too close and handsy. I was inventing choreography. Practicing my footwork. Spinning and dancing and frolicking away. He says in an upset way that I'm letting him freeze to death. Asks me again, "so you're just going to let me FREEZE?". I tell him that's really guilt trippy. I ask if we can go back to the car and eventually we do.
He ends up touching my hair at some point while pointing out how sleepy I am. I was so relieved to be back in a warm car that i guess I dozed off. I think he literally removed my clip without my consent to let my hair down for no fucking reason. I tell him my ex took my hair dryer when he complains about my hair still being damp. We don't talk about how he touched me.
He drives to the market to pick one up while I wait in the car. I am in the car under the impression he's picking up a soda or something. I have no idea. When he comes back I'm insisting I shouldn't have this because I didn't earn it, because it's a kind thought but it shouldn't be done by him and mostly because I can't be bought and that's how it feels.
He seems excessively prideful and self satisfied in the fact that whenever he takes me back to my place, he sends me in with bags of stuff. I never ask for this stuff. If I decline it then it gets dropped off anyways, you know? He asks if anybody I live with asks who's the guy who gets me "all this expensive stuff".
He goes on about how it'll be a good idea to meet my housemates so that he can come over, which I'm not even comfortable with. They aren't the reason he isn't coming over and he knows this but I guess denied it.
I make it clear I'm not open to that. I couldn't even let my housemates into my room. My room is sacred.
I know, just go to other people. I have so many online friends who reach out telling me i can talk with them. I just feel like an overwhelming sad cloud coming around my friends who might not even be emotionally available. I feel like a lot of people say it to be polite then show resentment so I'm scared of accepting the hands that reach out. I just run to what's familiar and has no problem driving up to my house in the middle of the night. Who will wait hours for me to stop crying just to take me away. It gives my heart a break in some ways but there's a give and take... Sorry guys. I'm sad. Don't know how to feel. Need support for this pressure. Thank you for the relief so far. I need to do better. I hope I'm cool and normal enough to make friends irl soon. That sounds pathetic but I do mean it. I've isolated for so long and mostly everyone has moved on. I try to reach out more now but it isn't enough to sustain a close friendship for most people. My energy is so low and here I'm trying to lift so much. I need a real friend I don't know how else to say it. A harmless hand to hold. Gentle nudge and a look into my eyes like hey it's going to be okay I see your pain but you're still here and I am here with you. Loneliness is so painful
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You got any headcanons or concepts you’d like to add to your AUs? I would share some of mine but I honestly can’t think of anything rn
Yeah I have like,, SilkWing au and villain au stuff hahaha
Idk, it's funny to think that SilkWing au Iris wears Lance's cape w pride, bc ofc, that's her dad's cape yknow, smth he always had, smth that gave him comfort too maybe, and he passed it down to her, going on how she's gonna be a great Dragon Master and Champion soon, and ofc she's not gonna let him down
Then there's villain au Iris who wanted nothing more than to take off that cape placed on her shoulders, wanted nothing more than to burn it until it's nothing but ashes, wanted nothing more than to lash out and rage and sob her almost empty heart out how heavy it was, being burdened by Lance's sins
Like imagine these two meeting tho, or switching places for like a day maybe cause I've been thinking abt this concept for a while, like these two switch and such hahah
And there's SilkWing au Iris, imagine that confrontation w Diantha right before the battle, and like yknow everyone fuckin stopped bc there's this sudden light and then it's gone and like everyone's fucking vibing. Then Iris is there, held in Hilbert's arms, she wakes up all "ow.. my head.. what happened?" She looks up, sees Hilbert, all "Hilbert! Wait, how did I get here in Unova?"
And ofc, that kinda,, set em off cause what does she mean by that she was always in Unova. "What..?"
She stands up, and sees the rest of her friends, "oh, everyone's here! What's going on? Last I remembered I was in Mahogany with Silver."
"Iris, what? Who's Silver?"
She gives him a look, "Hilbert, cmon, I always talk about my brother to you. You two even battled once! Don't tell me you forgot about him," shaking her head, she chuckled, "well, you are a bit scatterbrained."
Any other day, he would've shoved her playfully for that, they always tease each other and such yknow, but now he's just so confused. But still terrified that Diantha and even the champions were still w them. Iris was looking around now, sees the other champions, then turned, seeing Diantha at the other end of the field. She smiled, almost relieved really.
"mom! You're here!" Just as she was about to run to Diantha, Hilbert grabbed her hand, gripping tight. "Hilbert? What's wrong?" But Hilbert only looked at her w fear in his eyes, she never saw Hilbert like this before.
"Iris.. what did you call her..?"
Her head was honestly spinning, her friends know her parents, they've been to Johto, they even stayed w her for a few days. So why would he even ask that?
"Hilbert, you've met my parents already, why do you seem so surprised?"
And man just cjmdnd Diantha stepping in and telling Iris that her friends might just be tired doing their own things or smth, and Iris believing that yknow, almost going w Diantha. But like, Lance taught her better, the more she looked at Diantha, the more she noticed there was smth wrong. Her mother's eyes weren't cold like the ones before her right now.
Just as Diantha prompted her to follow her, so they could head back home, Iris stopped dead in her tracks. She looked at Diantha, at the other champions, then at her friends, then back to Dia.
"Uhm.. well, where is Silver, anyway? You said there was just a meeting set here in Unova, just for the Champions, but why isn't Silver here?"
And it was Lance who spoke, "Silver's at home, Iris. Now let's go home too."
But still, there was smth off, then she said, "okay, last one.. can you tell me why you two are here..?"
That stopped Diantha in her tracks, and Lance was there almost glaring at her.
"aren't.. aren't you two not Champions anymore? I'm Indigo's Champion now, and Silver became Kalos' Champion. Since we became Champion, the two of you stopped joining the meetings too. So.. why are you here..?"
Diantha chuckled at that. Smart girl. "You seem very aware now, impressive. A shame, you could've been a better Iris than what we have here."
And man was she pissed it took her a while to figure out. But Lance taught her abt body language, abt how to tell if someone is lying, he taught her how to be observant, to notice even the slightest of changes in ones demeanour, and ofc she's gonna make her father proud. But she knows how to retreat yknow, just as Diantha was abt to call out her pkmn, Iris called out her Charizard, commanding it to use smokescreen, giving her and the Unova kids time to escape.
#idk i just thought its a cool concept hahah#like yeah it didnt really happen in the au but still hahah#but fr silkwing iris would beat villain dia and lance fr fr#idk i wanna say bc yeah unlike villain au iris she wasnt manipulated and tortured so her sanity was still intact#unlike villain au iris who diantha broke over and over again#and like sw iris would probs be a bit unsure at first but she knows what she has to do#lance taught her that during desperate times dont ever hesitate#incapacitate them if you must#and iris was sure as hell aint gon hesitate#silkwing au#villain champions au#an ask and an answer#jerseyk112
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