#idk what the half of all that meant xD

[improvapocalyps]

"Okay, yeah. If you kill a red name, killed a red name-" "I'll give you a life for that. That's the deal." "We'll be back together like buddies again, Bdubs."

In participation of Extreme Timed Challenge Gift Exchange hosted by @extremetimedchallengeexchange!

[gifs, full storyboard, behind-the-scene rambles under cut]

past 48h animatics: MCYTETC2023, ETC2023

[Red Lives-Suspicion; Prayer-Determination; Fireworks]

Fiddled with gradient maps this time for some additional colors :D I would have colored in the eyes as well, but I didn't have enough energy left when the event hit the 47th hour xD

Also played around with camera movements. Respect to people who do fan edits and other forms of video/ assets editing 'cause keyframes are so 😭

13 hours to draft storyboard this time! Last year I used 16 but with waaay more frames idk how I accomplished that. Probably bc this year I'm drawing more than three(3) characters lmao

Progress Timeline:

[13th hour] finished storyboard/ draft (plany off time...) [25th hour] lineart for the first 10 seconds (wuh oh) [36th hour] lineart for the first 25 seconds (oh shit oh fuck gotta shorten it) [45th hour] finished Bdubs' part (NOOO I DONT HAVE TIME FOR ETHO)

ngl kinda glad i cut it in half rn 'cause i'd have to spend time figuring out shadowDog's design /lh

Designs I used for Lizzie and Joel (old art from 2022 and 2021 respectively) (holy shit i've been here for 3 years???)

Joel *shakes fist* i hate u and ur stupid beard

[Lyrics vibe/scene planning; hours before disaster]

I think most of the drawn parts didn't deviate from the initial idea. Mostly timing adjustments and building upon the vibes. The parts that were changed the most was the "And you caused it (×3 combo)".

Went from "vague flashbacks" to "following Etho and co. out of the cave and back to Scott's base while implying who Etho blames with single character focus shots".

The first one is Scott because he suggested the idea. Like, obviously he's to blame. It's not like Etho went along and cemented the deal himself. Scott totally peer-pressured him into it.

The second one is Etho because... well the scene ends up kind of being like. The sight of the Snow Fortress triggering a flashback. (EthosLab the content creator deliberately turned his camera towards the Snow Fortress and holds it there for a second instead of looking at the huge lava pillar right in front of him. What is WRONG with him.)

But also like. Clocks are kind of special to Bdubs right. Whoever gave him a clock basically has his (temporary) loyalty or at the least earned a favor from him. So like. If he hadn't gifted Bdubs the clock, which signifies a closer(?) bond, maybe Bdubs wouldn't be so devoted to him (wrong). Also serves as a call-back/ reference to the "Prayer-Determination" shot ("pray with clock" in the scene planning screenshot). I like to think that Bdubs weighted his options and thought about "if he will kill/ who to kill" a lot while following the other Red Names. And in that scene he's like, convincing/ motivating himself. Remembering who/ what he's doing this for.

(It is also meant to be part of my giftee's other prompt: "an exploration of the doubt one or both of them felt during the heart transfer that didn’t happen after Bdubs killed Lizzie, and the following guilt Etho felt." The Etho section starting from "we're setting fire to our inside for fun" til the end of the animatic is based on that prompt.)

After a brief period of self-blame, it's time to shift it onto someone else! Because you're in denial! If Bdubs hadn't gone red, then Etho wouldn't have to offer the deal. If Bdubs hadn't want to stay as teammates, then he wouldn't agree to the deal. If Bdubs wasn't so devoted to Etho, then he wouldn't have attacked Lizzie and gotten himself killed.

Then the animatic ends with the end of the session :D

...That's longer than I expected but also not that long. If you read through all that, tysm :] Tell me your thoughts! Have a good day/ evening/ night :D

[kitkatopinions]

I love when anti-rwde posters unintentionally say things that seem rwde lol. Here are my favorites so far:

The always good "Ironwood was always clearly an evil dictator" If this were true it would make the show worse than I already think it is, because not only did Team RWBY willingly work with him without any sort of recognition that it might be bad of them, but the writers have also talked about Ironwood's good intentions and the fall to villainy and how they wanted V7 to have no clear bad guy.

Whenever someone dismisses any early season as unimportant or something that no longer matters. Like, my guy, they're all supposed to matter and make up a good story together.

The people that say that the Blake and Yang ship is the exact same as Blake x Sun as a reason for why people who ship Blake with Sun but not Yang are wrong. Idk if they realize characters and dynamics are meant to be different and interesting.

The people who find redesigns of Yang where she's wearing clothing that's either the exact same level of 'modest' as the show or actually less sexualized and yell about how re-writers always overly sexualize Yang.

The people that defend every Jaune scene by saying he's just as much of a main character as Ruby. Like yes thank you for proving our point lol.

The people that constantly say important things just happen off screen. Things like main characters being friends, communicating important plot details to each other, showing grief at terrible deaths, unlearning racism... The more stuff people say happened off screen the more unintentionally insulting I think they're being because instead of saying "It was a mistake, they didn't have time, or they forgot" it's "they willfully didn't include it because they couldn't be bothered."

The people that say it's a good thing the entirety of Atlas was destroyed. Like personally I think the show could've done better at making Atlas and Mantle more varied but actually DID make it clear there were working class people and Faunus and good people just trying to make it that lived in Atlas and didn't deserve to lose everything. But apparently these people believe everyone in Atlas was some rich selfish asshole who deserved it and that would be very flimsy and bad writing.

The people who say that "drinking the tea" and "going to the tree" in V9 is actually just a metaphor for therapy. Like I know that Ruby essentially tried to commit suicide in V9. But I guess what they think what happened is that Neo was beating up Ruby while trying to make her get therapy, and everyone being a moment too late was them not arriving in time to stop Ruby from going to therapy, and when she fell down into the darkness that was symbolic of driving to her therapist's office, and when Yang was worried that Ruby wouldn't be herself anymore she actively was unhappy that Ruby was at therapy. Like how much worse written would V9 be if I actually believed what they did? XD

The people that insist that everything in RWBY was part of some super well thought out 'planned from the beginning' thing. Not only is that actually not a flex with a show that feels more disjointed, rushed, and ill-thought through with every season, but it's actively not what the writers say half the time when they do things like talk about how they 'wrote themselves into corners' and admit that at the beginning they were 'throwing things out and having to stick with it,' and having Blake's VA describe Blake as straight in official stuff and how they entirely reinvented Robin. Like either you think everything was not planned from the beginning or you think the writers are liars lol.

The people that actively just pretend or actually believe that the show is different than what it is, like the person who said RWBY was 'written by and for queer people' or the person who said Blake and Yang had been openly dating since V2 or the person who said Ruby was shown grieving Pyrrha way more than Jaune or the person who said that the RWBY villains were straight white men who weren't part of oppressed groups. What better way to prove that you actually don't like the show you're watching than to insist that it's a completely different show?

I'm sure there's more but those are the ones on my mind right now. XD Once again, I am certain that I have more love for RWBY than a lot of anti-rwde posters do.

[thehollowwriter]

All of my non-twst ocs are old ones I've had for a while. I have considered making them into twst ocs too as an au or smt... Let's see what we have:

☆My first ever queer couple consisting of a butch bi ginger (Cassandra- though she prefers being called Casey- Russou) and a lesbian ex gymnast (CatherineHarris). Both are assassins (or spies? A weird mix of the two idk little me was cooking and the food was a mystery). Casey's a sniper who's tough as hell and will fight you in the alleyway, and Catherine is as elegant and charming as can be and you'll be quite seduced until poison gets slipped into your drink.

☆Twin brother (Alekai Snow) and sister (Chromespear Snow. I'm working on the name change, okay) from another planet. They're part of a species I called the Nocturi. Well, half Nocturi and half Solarian. Alekai's a doctor who was forcibly declawed and needs tech to help his fingers move bc it caused nerve damage, and Chromespear's a blacksmith, and she needed more development tbh but she was iconic

☆The boss of my two assassins who's just an incredibly superfluous, cartoony supervillain simply known as "The Director" (nobody knows his name and neither does he 💀) He's shipped with an irl friend's oc who's a mafia boss and they're both incredibly evil together

☆The powerful mage and general (Ephemeris Vikatte) who's got a whole *gestures* thing going on with Alekai. The two of them are basically just "enemies" (in a petty way) to friends to lovers. He's a bit of a dumbass tbh XD himbo energy

☆The guy who in retrospect is low-key a beta Silas. (Kurai Dusk) He's traumatised and tired but he loves his wifey to the ends of the earth. He's also the second in command to the Empress who I'm considering making a Queen instead because little Quinn did not understand what that title meant lmao

☆Another doctor guy (Assegai Copper) but he has anxiety and mommy issues and powerful magic and is trying his best. He's a small-town GP (like REALLY small-town. Like a village) and he accidentally saved an assassin named Crimson (unrelated to my other two assassins) who he has a situationship with now XD (I actually started writing a story for them when I was like... 12/13. Rewrite? 👀)

☆My beloved Empress/Queen (Achlys) who's the last of her species, and whose species in question I actually wanted to be a mimicry of the Nocturi. She has immensely powerful magic and control of shadows and the darkness (was known as "the Shadow Empress" Can you tell this was my edgy phase yet)

☆My mad scientist (Dr. Maddeline Kruger) who "killed" Catherine. Casey's been hunting Dr. Kruger down ever since, but she doesn't know Catherine is still alive. I'm probably gonna change this storyline there was a lot wrong in retrospect 💀

Okay I'm tired now but tadaaaa should I make twst versions of them

Tagging: @distant-velleity @br3adtoasty @rainesol @theleechyskrunkly @jovieinramshackle

@galaxies-and-gore @cyanide-latte @cynthinesia @officialdaydreamer00

@krenenbaker @offorestsongs @kitwasnothere @elenauaurs @boopshoops

@inotonline @1dont-really-know @kazumify @minteasketches

@elysia-nsimp

@skrimpyskimpy @casp1an-sea @offorestsongs @tixdixl

@poisoned-pearls @the-trinket-witch

@ramshacklerumble @ghostiidasponk @thegoldencontracts @sillyslipperybananapeel @cloudcountry

@skriblee-ksk @twstinginthewind @lumdays @theolivetree123 @natsukishinomiyaswife

@authoruio @jewelulu @raguiras @moonyasnow @skibidibabygirl

@quartztwst @yuizenihaswriten @oya-oya-okay @kirans-wonderland @coffinkissez

@idikeis @s-t-y-x @minutewondertwist @random-twst-and-oc-stuff

[thedragonqueen1998]

Today at work i got insanly inspired to write and once i got off work, i immidiently went on my phone to type it out. XD I just finished a 3 hour long writing ses(had a 15 minute food break in the middle). ^^ Probably just gonna forever gonna be a wip thing, but it was fun and i'm kinda proud of it. Despite it being rough in some parts, mostly because i wanted to rush to the 2nd half and i didn't wanna get stuck, i'm happy to share it. ^^

It's a kinda long, so i'm gonna add a Read more line to not fill your dash with text. Also, first time trying formatting out! XD

So, originally this post was just gonna be a "i actually wrote something! Look!" thing, just showing of some work i did, but after writing the reason why i wrote a line a certain way, it went into something very sad and kinda dark, so if you don't wanna read about death, a light mention of suicidal thought and grief... just stop after What even is my life.

Idk why i wrote it, but it took alot of effort and it feels... important to me, i guess. Part of processing and such. So, yeah. Read at your discretion. Thank you for your time. 💜

Ezio had many regrets in his long life. Not being there when his father and brothers were arrested. Of not being there more for his sister and mother. Of not trying to be together with Cristina. Not being able to save her. Or being able to save Uncle Mario and Monteriggioni. But biggest of all, not having spent more time with his family before the execution.

He had love, but didn't cherish it. Didn't truly feel it and took it for granted. But unlike so many others, Ezio could take those regrets and change them. Thanks to Desmond.

When he walked into the Library, he thought he might get an answer or two in return for many more. He truly didn't expect that calling out Desmonds name while the Apple bathed the walls in gold would result in it being answered by the being himself.

The being looked like a man, clad in a white light, eminating from a strange device under his right arm. His face looked like an exact replica of Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad's face, though his build was closer to his. Broad shoulders hidden underneath a strange hooded white doublet and long legs wearing strange tight fitted pants made from a material he did not recognise. Even the scar was the same as his! Was Ezio made in the image of the one he was the Prophet for? Was Altaïr the herald? All questions Ezio wondered, but not knowing if Desmond was like Minerva or not, he dared not waste any questions if the beings patient was thin.

But first: "Are you Desmond?" He had to know, have it confirmed, even if the being appeared after the name was called.

"Ezio? Is this the Library? Am i seriously bleeding while dying!?" Desmond was looking around at the empty tomb, before his eyes returned upon Ezio.

"Yes, this is Altaïr's library. You are bleeding? I do not see any blood and you are dying!? Is there anything i can do to help you? Please, my lord. Tell me what i need to do to save you." Ezio was desperate to know his purpose and if all his life lead to this moment, where he could save Desmonds life, he would fulfill it.

"There's nothing you can do. I am dying semi willingly and even if this is some Animus infused death hallucination, it is nice having my last moments with you, even if your not really here. I am so sorry i couldn't answer any of your questions or try to save you from losing everything. You never deserved any of it. In the end it didn't really even matter. I am sorry you wasted your time chasing riddles and ghosts." He looked so grieve struck while saying it and the look Desmond had while gazing down onto Ezio could only be described as lovingly.

"What do you mean? Could you have saved my uncle!? My father and brothers!? Why didn't you if you do not think i deserved it! I have served the Brotherhood almost my entire life, sacrificed so much trying to find out what Minerva meant and now your telling me that it was all for nothing!? If you think i wasted my time then give it back!"

Desmonds eye's widen before softly smiling and saying: "Your right, you wasted your time and sacrificed too much for nothing. Let's change that."

Before Ezio knew it, the world went white and he knew nothing more.

—————

When Ezio awoke, it was to a bed he hadn't seen in almost 40 years. His childhood bed and his room. He couldn't believe it. He was given a second chance. To live his life. To right wrongs. To save his family! To think going to the Library would result in this!

At the thought of the Library, Ezio suddenly remembered Sofia. To have forgotten her and even abandoned her without a second thought left Ezio feeling guilty. Would she wait outside the Library before realising he would never come back? Or because he is now in the past, a past where he intends to change the future, would she never meet him? Never exist? The thought of her hurt, but like so many others, Ezio knew that him being in her life would have risked hers. Even if she knew and accepted it, it is still better if she never got the chance to know him and inevitibly suffer because of it. Same with Cristina. Though he could now choose her, he knew that despite the many mistakes in his life, the Brotherhood was not one of them and his refusal to properly let her go killed her. Letting that life affect her once again was too cruel. It was for the better to just let her go.

Federico nudged him with his elbow. "Brother, what has you thinking so hard you look like you bit into something bitter?"

"Nothing much, just wondering what i should get." Ezio smiled and laughed. He was currently out with his family on a trip the market. The last time around, he had decided to sneak off to spend some time with a girl he didn't even remember the name of anymore instead of spending time with his loved ones, to his great shame and regret. This was the last thing his family had done together outside of dinners before the execution in 3 days. That he missed out on it was one of his biggest regrets, but Desmond let him change it.

That Ezio might never truly understand or know what or who Desmond is, how he watched him in the Vault or even what Minerva's people and the Pieces of Eden truly were will forever haunt him, but the trade to see his family again and to even be able to save them is a fair trade. He can go his life wondering these questions and maybe try to find them now that he will have more time, thanks to already knowing the Templars plans and who will be an enemy or ally.

He felt a finger poke him inbetween his eyebrows.

"There you go again Brother. Thinking too hard! Be careful or you might hurt yourself." Federico teased before yelping and then laughing when Ezio pushed him.

"Please don't start fighting now sons." Their father said before turning back to the stall owner to continue discussing what wares to buy and the prices.

"Sorry Father!" Ezio said before giving his brother a teasing look that promised this was not over.

Ezio remembered this day well enough. Not to remember the woman he decided to chase, but enough to know that when his family had been at the market a horse had run wild there and according to Claudia, nearly trampled her down in the confusion.

He was a bit sceptical to believe it was as close as she had made it out to be, but he knew horses much better now than he did before. After years of riding them to and from places in the chase for his targets, he knew that having one running towards you in a blind panic could scare anyone. Even though he knew to be wary of them and treat them with respecy during his original childhood, he didn't truly get how these gentle beings could be as scary as his sister had made the poor creature out to be.

According to his family, it had been a war horse, bloodied, running around in a blind panic, probably scared from a skirmish. Being chased by guards hadn't helped and eventually the guards got a good shot at it and put it down.

Ezio wanted to save his sister years of fearing horses, so he kept an eye and a ear out for any signs that the animal was on it's way.

There. A scream. Everyone stopped and looked around for the source. The source was still hidden by the crowds, but in the distance you could start seeing people moving away from something coming this way and the screams were getting closer.

Ezio breathed and slipped into his Second Sight, the Eagle Vision, as he now knew Altaïr had called it. Or more accuratly, Eagle Sense. With the years, his constant use and need for it had changed his Sight. It had become much stronger, letting him see farther, expanded his hearing, to let him hear his enemies heartbeat and even know what moves they were going to make. Even let him know where his enemies was going to go on a patrol route.

It truly was a gift and now he would use it to try and predict where the animal would go, as to lead his sister and family away from the danger. Then he saw it. The shine of something important. Something that glowed as strongly as the Apple of Eden had. The horse.

There was much about his Gift he could not explain. He had tried, but it is much like explaining sight to a blind person. Why things he didn't even know about could glow gold and lead him to the answer. Why allies glowed blue and enemies red, nor how he could tell friend from foe and now. His Sight told him, with the same intuition as telling friend from foe, that this horse was Desmond.

How is Desmond here? Why? Did he lie about dying? Or was certain death only a large chance that Desmond beat? Ezio supposed it did not matter. If he lets events play as they had before, Desmond would be struck down by an arrow within minutes. Oh, maybe Desmond had tried to prevent his father and brothers demise, but was struck down in the attempt? Though, why choose to do it as a rampaging horse? Either way, Desmond was clearly panicking, almost upon him now. If Ezio could not calm him down, his death was guaranteed.

But how? Ezio has just seconds now to plan a way to stop him before he is trampled down.

Then, he finally realises, that among the bright gold he shines, he also glowes blue. Such a deep colour which he has only seen in the greatest friends or closest family and he knows, Desmond would never harm him. The look of pure love on Desmonds face made more sense now.

So Ezio decides to not move and simple raise up his hands, as if to pet the horse.

"EZIO!"

————

Desmond was in pain. He knew that Juno lied about his death being quick and painless, but god, why did it have to hurt so much!? During his hallucination, it wasn't nearly so bad! And can't forget the weird nightmare he's having ontop of it. He's a goddamned horse on some battlefield. He was rearing up when the nightmare started, neighing as his rider was shot and killed by an arrow.

There's so much blood. The smell strikes fear in his heart. There's so much red. He slips into Eagle Vision and there's even more red. Not a spec of blue. A sword slides against the armor he is wearing and the screech of metal is too much. He bolts.

He needs to run. Away from the monsters with sharp sticks. Away from the smell of blood and death. Away from the shadows hiding hunters. They follow him. They chase him for a long time.

He is getting so tired.

He needs to get back to the barn. His owner would make everything alright. He would croon soft noises he did not understand, but the tone was soft and gentle. He would give him a treat while brushing him down after a hard days work.

He did ride him into scary battles he did not understand, but afterwards he would wash and groom him extra thoroughly, while feeding him the best apples, crooning more sounds in a happy tone. He would repeat one of the few sounds he understood, which meant "him" and "pay attention to me".

Dante.

But he wasn't on his back anymore and he didn't hear his voice. Just the loud, scary noises of more men in the shiny hard thing. They had the pointy sticks too and tried to take the things dangling from his mouth. Only his owner can touch that! Only he is to be trusted with them.

Running is getting harder, there is large, straight hills in the way and the path is narrower with many strangers in it.

There is still so much red. He can still smell the blood, feel it clotting his fur. Too much red!

Blue.

Suddenly there's blue in front of him. He knows blue means ally. Though why and how this person is blue confuses him. But he is Blue and running him over is not good, but why is he standing there!? Does he not see the red!? Smell it!? Does he not understand we need to run!?

"Desmond"

That single word pierces the fog of fear and wild panic that has flooded Desmonds mind. Ezio is in front of him, hand already gripping the reigns while the other rests on his muzzle.

"There we go Desmond, everything is alright."

Desmond still feels phantom threads of fear, but with Ezio's calming blue glow and his voice saying gentle reassurances, it feels far away.

Now with his mind fully human and not driven by horse instincts or memories, the question becomes: How and why the fuck is he a horse in 15th century Italy with Ezio!?

What even is his life.

————

So, a couple parts i'm stupidly happy about is the "He had love, but didn't cherish it. Didn't truly feel it and took it for granted." part. This, as you can probably tell was inspired by the famous quote "When I was a young man, I had liberty, but I did not see it. I had time, but I did not know it. And I had love, but I did not feel it."

I believe Ezio didn't fully understand liberty until he tried to live a peaceful life with Sofia and realised he would always fear Templars taking revenge on his family and time, because the knowledge that he would never see his children grow up to adults had never been a concern before he met Sofia. He probably thought he wouldn't have a family at all.

But love. Love he would understand what he missed. He would understand it just days after he lost his father and brothers. Those moments you missed out on. Of opportunities to spend time that you squandered away. Time you will never get back, because in real life we don't have time travel.

And now i understand it. Before the end of the last year, i was like Ezio before the loss. Before i lost my grandparents only a few weeks apart.

Those opportunities to spend time was rare and thankfully i took most of them, but i still squandered it away by not actually spending time with them. I just visited and hid away in my room, wasting the time by sitting on the phone.

I will forever regret that because ny memory is shit and besides a few childhood ones, i have no memories of them. I still remember their voices, they were pretty distinct thankfully, but how long until i forget that.

It hurts and as someone who is afraid of death and it's finality, such a reminder that time and love is finite is soulcrushing. It is only recently that i have truly started to think of my grandparents and i guess try to process the fact they are gone forever.

When we first got the news that my grandpa had died, i was even more glued to my phone, not wanting to acknowledge what was happening. I also didn't wanna sleep and only got some when i passed out from exhaustion. We even went to the doctor to get time of work and some sleep medication i didn't dare end up taking.

I even had thoughts of just taking all the pills and just sleeping, to get away from the pain forever. But i'm thankfully too much of a coward, so it just stayed thoughts. I'm doing much better now and as i mentioned, i think i'm starting to process the fact that they are gone.

So, yeah. This post went in a direction i didn't expect. But it feels important and maybe in a few years i can look back at this post and see a snapshot of who i was and reflect on who i am now. So, here's to the future me and anyone else who needs to hear it:

I hope things are going well and if they're not... well, things get better. They always do. You're loved and even if your loved ones are gone, they live on in you. You will carry that love with you, for the rest of your life. 💜

[ganondoodle]

Dude I love how you make gods feel like *gods*. One thing I think a lot of people have trouble with is making their deities feel like either A. Non-characters that are just forces of nature, like a hurricane, or B. making them *too* much like regular characters, negating the impression of how powerful they're supposed to be.

In every part of that first Demise vs Hylia fight, it felt like something that would be both awe-inspiring and terrifying to witness, and when you mentioned in that other post how Demise would use his true form to escape a mountain, it gave me mental images of a massive volcano, but simultaneously all the *rage* that would be involved. Like I don't know the context but. Oh boy is Demise probably not going to be happy about getting stuck in a mountain

I just!! It is very early rn and Idk if I'm making a lot of sense but you are *so good at this*

I'll be honest, at first i wondered if this ask was actually meant for me or perhaps got to the wrong person ( i got teary eyed reading this ... multiple times qoq)

ANd yes i agree that often gods tend to be either too distant or too much like a normal character, personally im not a fan of the latter xD

the deities in destiny are supposed to be like a middle ground, the three golden gods are very 'other' while the deities are supposed to be a mix of mortals and gods, not half-gods since they more god than mortal but still with a connection to the world (thats almost the entire reason the gods made them like that, bc the gods themselves cannot walk the worlds they created on their own; the deities are essentially their hand to control the world - which isnt working to well as we see gnvfjdknkdfn)

anyway, waht i mean is ... Thank you??!! i, sometimes get so lost in self doubt and how others do similar concepts just wayyy better and like .. idk how to express how this lil ask makes me feel (positively!!!), i always hope i can convey at least a fraction of what i feel writing my stories, which is hard with no movement and no sound, just art, to hear that i am actually somewhat succeeding at it is kinda .. idk, baffling?? i am no good with words myself ;O;

the scene you mentioned is from chapter 3, and i got so motivated by this ask that i had to .. attempt to draw a lil concept of that scene in it, even tho i know its really rough and i hope will get it done better once i get to that chapter .. but its something? ;u;

[they-reap-what-we-sow]

20 questions for writers

thank you for the tag @fanfictiongreenirises I finally managed to finish a tag game!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

168- with 44 podfics and the rest are regular fics!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

346,848. unfathomable number who is she where did she come from

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Batman (Batfam) my love my life, but 9-1-1 is a close second with one-offs for a lot of my other passing interests.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Floppy Bird - crack fic that was meant to be an angst fic that I never understood why people liked so much asfhjs

cocoa on a cold night - a classic timby holiday fic that I wrote in the middle of summer, talk about environmental storytelling

secrets un(revealed) - the only purposeful long fic I've ever written, and also the most trope mashing I've ever done with reverse robins, magical realism au, and delicious delicious miscommunications (in my head the only fic that deserves to be in the top five :wheeze: )

Eggshells - vent fic alert !! very embarrassing that people like this I try not to think about it ":)

taking the blade (for you and yours) - a round robin fic written with the server and CHOCK full of Damian suffering.

5. Do you respond to comments?

NO PICTURES. NO COMMENT. I DONT KNOW HOW TO READ.

no jk jk I really really try to but once I start getting behind it's just a whole spiral. these days I have a better chance of replying to a comment on an old fic than a brand new one because I dont want leave them half replied

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

any of my death fics probably? I think with DC a death is a little more inconsequential than other fandoms just because of how often it's unpermanent, so as a concrete answer, I'll say for you (i would cross the line). nothing quite like parental grief.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

happy ending wink-wonk or XD

probably Who The Hell Is Red Hood? - I've done things there with growth and healing that DC HQ would shudder to imagine

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not regularly, thank everything, but the one controversial three-some I posted needed comment regulation lmao

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes and uh, the kinky kind? idk take a look for yourselves I guess

10. Do you write crossovers?

Yes, and they're ALWAYS unserious- Buck from 9-1-1 dating Emma from Friends (yes Ross and Rachel's kid) anyone?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Uh, not by a person? as far as I know? but I have found my fic on those like, document websites??? which is weird lmao just read them on your phones guys not everything needs to be uploaded

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

weee yes! round robin my beloved, and also every fic @canonicallyshort and I have written in our threads. those count. to me. emotionally.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I WILL GO DOWN WITH MY MULTISHIP (which really means I'm never going down at all) but really I dont think I will ever get over Merthur... or Buddie... or- you see what I mean?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

oh god I have so many wip that I am holding out hope for but my biggest WIP is an unpublished hellhole affectionately entitled "Death Pit" by everyone who is working on it- most notably because it features a literal Death Pit, every horror, angst, whump, and trauma trope you can think of, and a cast of characters and a plot thread so long we have 20+ page outline documents that aren't even fully updated... I shudder to think what will become of it one day, I imagine sentience isn't very far off

16. What are your writing strengths?

why is this an interview question. I dont know my strengths really?? um. I have good ideas, that one I'll say. execution is a different story (likely one that will never get told. like the rest of my good ideas)

I also think I do fairly well with scene descriptors. I really like to set a scene because I'm seeing a movie in my head and you all should too!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I'm down to clown globally! I dont like to use google translate though, so if im writing in another language it's only because SOMEONE on the server is a native speaker and can vouch for my text.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

oh god one direction. head in hands. it was an 'adopted by 1d' fic that I made my mom beta, and turned it in to my 6th grade English teacher as my creative writing assignment. then I made a poem about it. then I wrote a song about it. thankfully it never got published and is trapped in the cursed purple file folder it was 'hidden' in since 7th grade. my first published fic was almost 7 years later with a Gomens fic!

20. Favourite fic you've written?

AHh um. favorite child scene here, but top contenders include: lithium + 5 for its graphic design and medical accuracy, fiery veins on speechless days for its emotional whump that makes me hurt every time I reread it, [PODFIC] wither on the shore which is not a fic I wrote but one of my favorite podfics of @silk-scarlet-ribbons 's works.

tagging (if you wish to participate!) @canonicallyshort @silverandsunflowers @selkienight60 @crows-murder

[meguemii]

Hardly Friends.

06. What it Could Have Been.

Pairings: Megumi x Reader, Nobara x Yuji (platonic)

Synopsis:

Word Count: 1.5k

Returning to your room hot and bothered you stripped yourself of your cold wet bathing suit. and changing into some more comfy clothes.

5 minutes later, Nobara walked into your shared room quietly rummaging through her stuff eventually glancing at you then doing a double take to look at your wet hair. “Did you and Megumi go swimming? Is THAT why you didn’t want Yuji and I coming back so soon!?” She erupted into laughter. Running over to shush her by putting a finger over her lips. “No. Well yes. SHUT UP!” You shouted. Still laughing at you “holy shit Y/N, did you guys fuck?”. Your face dropped and that was her hint, “Oh my god you did!” Shushing her again groaning “No! We were just getting along for once and I didn’t want either you you ruining the moment!” quickly explaining to her while leaving the more important half out. She didn’t need to know that.

“Well either way that’s good! Well actually maybe not either way. Might have been awkward as hell if you guys hooked up.” She said as she walked to her side of the room putting her shopping bags down and rummaging through her suit case most likely to get her own clothes. You stood there turned away from her view frowning, she was right. It would be awkward now, even though you guys didn’t hook up. Taking 10 steps forward and 100 steps backwards.

“Do you have my speaker?” Nobara asked snapping you out of your depressing thoughts, you turned to look at her with a half smile trying to cover up what you were previously thinking about. “Oh yeah, I was using it while I was swimming. I was gonna go have a bath to get rid of this chlorine out of my hair, can I borrow it again?” She hummed a yes in response. Quickly grabbing the speaker and your toiletries you made your way to the bathroom and started running hot water.

Looking in the full body mirror and hugging yourself for any sense of comfort. Trying to feel something other than embarrassed. Ding.. Ding..

Your phone going off twice, snapping out of your own world you picked up your phone to see who had messaged you. It was Yuta and Megumi. “Hey Y/N, sorry if that was weird, idk what came over me. Never meant for something like that to happen” frowning over the words he had sent, he didn’t mean for it to happen? Then redirecting your attention to Yuta’s message it read “really been missing you, can’t wait for you to come home. send a photo so i can remember you?😉” There was apart of you still itching for any sort of sexual attention.

Deciding to fill the void Megumi left, you took a provocative photo of yourself, although nothing showed it still showed everything. Opening your photos app to hit share you clicked the first contact that came up.

Smiling to yourself you set your phone down and listened to soft music as you relaxed in the bath. About 5 minutes had passed and your phone started buzzing. Quickly wiping your hand off you reached for your phone.

Gumi XD is calling…

Answer Decline

Why the fuck was he calling you? Hitting accept you heard heaving breathing “Y/-N, did you mean to send that to me?” Megumi’s voice was low and cracked when he said your name. Send what? What did you send?! Internal panic quickly set it. “What?” you said hoping to god you didn’t send what you thought you did. Opening yours and Megumi’s messages immediately being met with the photo you had meant to send to Yuta, you had actually sent it to Megumi. “holy shit holy shit holy shit. I am SO sorry!!” you screeched in pure horror and embarrassment.

A minute had passed and a shaky breath came through the phones speaker. “..Megumi?”saying his name quietly but more questioningly. “yes angel?” ANGEL?! Your stomach did a backflip and all you could feel was your whole body fluttering.

What did you do? Hang up. You hung the phone up. What the fuck. No shot that just happened. Your phone dinged again, horrified to check what the notification was you mustered up all the courage you had left and saw it was only Nobara. “Are you okay in there?” she texted. Quickly typing a “yeah i just saw a spider, everything’s good.” Sinking down into the water, hoping you’d drown.

-

Maybe an hour had passed only deciding to get out when you started turning pruney . Getting out of the tub, shivering once met with the cold air. That and the fact that you had humiliated yourself twice tonight. Well this one was humiliating at least. Getting dressed back into the clothes you were previously wearing you took a good long look at yourself in the mirror once again and puffing out your chest in false confidence only deflating in shame seconds later with a sad huff.

You returned to the bedroom and saw Nobara laying on her bed on her phone. Ignoring your own bed you crawled up right beside her and sighed. She glanced at you and then went back to her phone. Sighing again a bit heavier this time she continued to ignore you. This process happened multiple times before you looked up at her dramatically “you ass. you’re supposed to ask what’s wrong! I literally crawled into your bed and cuddled up to you and started sighing dramatically!” now pouting at her. Nobara put her phone down and looked to you with a dead expression. “oh my dearest best friend, what is the matter? did something happen?” She asked sarcastically. “Yep that’s what I thought. Anyways, something did happen. And I hope my next breath is my last.” throwing your arms in the air flailing them around, resulting in an amused snort from the girl.

“Anyways so, something did happen..” you paused waiting for her to respond. “Well obviously?” she flatly said with a playfully eye roll. Scoffing in response and continuing your story. Basically recapping her on the pool story.

You guys were now sitting criss cross on the bed with face masks on. “Y/N, from the bottom of my heart, i’m so sorry for cock blocking.” She said as she crossed her heart with her hand making you laugh.

Calming down you continued your story “No but Nobara this is where it gets bad.” she looked at you waiting for the rest. “So Yuta messaged me saying he missed me and asked for a picture, right? okay. So I took a provocative picture and went into the photo app to send it to him and instead of clicking Yuta’s contact.” you paused taking a deep breath to catch it. “I ACCIDENTALLY SENT IT TO MEGUMI.” Nobara screeched “No you didn’t!”. You let out a cry “I DID. BUT GET THIS. He called me. Asking if it was meant for him but he said it in a low shaky voice. then he said my name but his voice cracked.” Nobara let out a “ouuu girlll” for the dramatic effect. “Okay now get this, I started apologizing like crazy and it was silent so I said “Megumi..?” AND HE SAID “yes angel?” WHICH THEN THE ONLY LOGICAL THING TO DO WAS HANG UP!” burying your face into your hands.

“Y/N.. this could either be so bad or so good. You have to admit Megumi is pretty hot” she smirked and you playfully hit her. “Yeah but did you forget he messaged me he never meant for anything at the pool to happen? Maybe he’s super uncomfortable now!” Nobara stopped you and countered with a comment that made your face heat up bright red, even with a cooling face mask. “Only reason he’d be uncomfortable right now is because you probably gave him a raging hard on.” earning another punch to her shoulder which she laughed off.

“Nobara I’m serious, this is so bad! I have to see him everyday for the next two weeks!” you cried elongating the word ‘bad’. Her demeanour changed and she gave you a soft reassuring smile, “Y/N, everything is going to be okay. I swear.”

That was that for the rest of the night, you fell asleep in Nobara’s bed. The only problem is was that you didn’t fall asleep. Nobara had fallen asleep so long ago, it felt like ages. Leaving you wide awake staring at the ceiling, you had no idea what time it was. Nothing or no one to keep you company besides your thoughts that you desperately needed to figure out.

Did Megumi really not mean anything he did? If so why would he call you like that, the shaky breathes seemed so.. sensual. Now with a clear mind you could only think about how they made you feel. Like you needed him. Like you wanted to be there in person to hear those shaky breathes.

You didn’t know what changed but suddenly you were enamoured with Megumi, head spinning at the thought of him. But doubts still flooded your mind. This is the first time he’d ever acted like that. First time he’s acted like that with you at least. All you knew was that you wanted more.

You wanted to know what could have happened, where it would have led. You needed to know. You needed to know what it would have felt like to let him continue what he started. To feel more of him on a deeper and even more of an intimate level.

Megumi Fushiguro what are you doing to me?

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@ladytamayolover @hisheadismountfuji @dazaisfavgf @bleedingwhiteroses222 @kasumitenbaz

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feeding my girls Megumi x Y/N content is my favourite thing :3 GUYS WHAT DO WE THINK??? ARE WE ROCKING WITH MEGUMI’S ANTICS? what was he doing on the other side of the phone?🧐 OKAY MIGHT PUMP OUT ANOTJER CHAPTER RN LOVE YOU GUYS!!

Tag list is open if interested!

[mostlikelytofangirl]

You know what would be neat

In an AU where JGY grows up in the Jin (JGS being forced to accept him early in some way or another) and there are vampires

JGS is a vampire and so is Meng Shi. Madam Jin is human. As a result, JGY is a fullblooded born vampire while JZX is a dhampir

It would be really funny if people within the very vampire-heavy/vampire-as-aristocracy society look at JZX and JGY together and immidiactly choose to adress their woes to JGY.

Because JGY is all vampire, pointy ears and greyish skin and gaunt face and all, while JZX looks utterly out of place among the vampires because he looks like a normal human with fangs

And this infuriates JGS because JZX is his heir and JGY is a bastard lmao

Lol ok, idk if you meant for this to be hilarious, but it's just so funny to me to think that JGY finally could be considered of better "pedigree" than this brother for their society's standards and it's pissing JGS off so badly XD.

I can imagine this as a world where vampires are very few but very elite ala Vampire Hunter D, so JGS married Madam Jin as a sort of social or political move, like an alliance with a powerful human family idk, but also got MS pregnant, and despite her being very low in their hierarchy, she was still a full vampire and thus, the rules demand that their son be acknowledged since full blooded vampires are rare/hard to conceive/not very fertile/etc.

Except a bastard is very much NOT part of his agreement with the powerful human family he is supposed to be an ally to now (and whose fortune/political standing he now shares lol), so it's all very tense in his household now bc, as a son of a lawful marriage, JZX should be the sole heir... only he's a dhampir and, while not looked down upon bc they are still better than full mortals, someone like him would normally be considered lesser than his full blooded vampire brother.

It's so goddamned ironic that here is where JGY would finally be seen as the "right" Jin and the one the gentry would consider one of them :'D.

Now, it'd be interesting to see why JGS is upset at this development. It could be bc he legit loves JZX and not JGY and thus it's all a matter of his favorite son being given his rightful place despite of his half-blood nature. Or bc it endangers his alliance with the humans and he has to remind everybody of who his heir is every time there's the slightest insinuation that both his sons would inherit, or worse-- that of course his pure blooded son should be the one inheriting, how lucky he was to still have a vampire son despite marrying a human, surely he wouldn't defy tradition and taint his noble family by having a dhampir as head of the next generation when a perfect fully vampire Jin son is right there :')))))

It'd also be interesting to see how the brothers' dynamics would be, bc while things behind closed doors could go very much like canon (probably with MS being a concubine or something), when in public, it's clear that they would not be treated equally, if not having JGY be privileged in their social circle. How would that the boys' perception of themselves and each other be? Sorta like "no matter what ppl say, I am dad's heir and favorite son" or "dad may love you more, but everybody knows who is the weird one here"... or maybe they actually find solace in each other, one being there for the other when their family/society reminds them that they are inherently different and should be treated as such, only feeling like they can truly be equals when they are alone with each other.

It's a very fascinating scenario, let me tell you! I love me some vampires and I love me some Jin bros feels, so I'm so in with this :D

[thewickedkat]

100% love your analysis on laudna and her handling of the current situation!!! This is a tangent off of that because this isn’t meant to detract from your really good take on laudna’s current state of mind! But I also have a thought that in that whole altercation a more prevalent part of Delilah was influencing her to the point of even her motives and fears were mingling with Delilah’s so the moment/ the way she snaps at Chetney abt how he had ‘no right to talk about loss to her’ gave me the impression that that was Delilah helming the reigns more so than laudna. Idk I think the lines between them have blurred so much since laudna has been feeding her more and more. I really worry about how she hasn’t even acknowledged that aloud because she really is becoming Delilah. It definitely lends itself to the self sabotage that you talked abt already, but you can really see the flaws laudna already carries being amplified and influenced by Delilah to get her ultimate goal. And as a viewer gotta give it to marisha because her rping as always is so layered and interesting

(I also haven’t really paid attention to how the cr fandom is reacting to the current debacle, but I’m sure it’s rancid lmaoo ‘xD just want to say I really like your take being able to acknowledge the extremely flawed characters without infantilizing them or condemning them to be without any redemption and how this is also a show made for entertainment)

oh, i think Delilah is definitely influencing Laudna more than even Laudna realises, and when she is aware of it, i think that knowledge brings a deep and abiding shame, which only further fuels her self-sabotage. because in all honesty, here is a woman who, in her life, apparently had little: Laudna didn't have money, or lands, or a title; she was a simple farm girl who had a budding propensity for magic. by her own account, she had few friends. by the time the Briarwoods came to Whitestone, she was just ordinary, a little lonely, and then the new lady of the land comes and acknowledges her, seems to see her, and invites her up to the castle. what common person wouldn't be a little starstruck by that?

then the most horrible thing happens to her. she wasn't special, after all, just bore a passing resemblance to someone the Lady hated, and her corpse was strung up for all to see after it was altered. and then she is 'restored' to something that only passes for life, scares townspeople through no fault of her own, and is summarily run out of town and left to subsist in isolation, always on the fringes of civilisation, for the next thirty-odd years.

it's awful. and of course Delilah is going to take full advantage of that, no one knows you like I do, dear, no one understands what it's like to be able to do what you can and be what you are, but I do, I've always seen that within you and I can teach you, I can help you do so much more; all you need to do is let me in.

even if Laudna despised Delilah in the beginning (and from what we know, she absolutely did), after a while, with only her as company, Delilah is going to erode Laudna's resolve like water on a stone. it's grooming, without the gross sex connotations. all Delilah has to do is hammer down on the point that she has known Laudna the longest and still 'chooses' to 'help' her grow in power, remind her that she has seen Laudna at her worst and hasn't forsaken her. that's it, that's the crack she gets her narsty bitch fingers in and pries open. not even Imogen knows Laudna's darknesses and insecurities, not like Delilah, and Imogen will never need Laudna the way Delilah does--she's eminently capable, Imogen is.

Laudna is terrified she will be left alone again, and so she swallows down those parts of herself that seem to cause friction: when she got angry after the party split and the half that went to Uthodurn seemed to have a good time (Letters found FRIDA; Fearne and Chet and Deanna knocked boots; they had a shopping spree), she choked that anger back so as not to upset Imogen. when she tried, later, to talk to Imogen about Delilah, Imogen literally cut her off with a kiss and derailed that conversation. every time a serious discussion potentially crops up between those two, the words I love you are deployed (not just by Imogen, to be fair) almost as a stop sign, to quell any unpleasantness between them.

(not that either of them know what a healthy relationship is like, having grown up alone and isolated, whether emotionally or physically or both. not that either of them know what stable love is like, how good it can be despite spats or arguments.)

so Laudna keeps quiet on a great many things and Delilah isn't one to sleep on an opportunity.

see, i think Laudna knows she isn't special but deeply wants to be, just like any person does. i think she very much wants to belong, to be part of something, and i think she is afraid that if she is 100% wholly open, she will run everyone off--after all, it's happened before, repeatedly. and Delilah just gleefully pours gasoline on that fire, amplifying the self-sabotage and self-destructive tendencies.

but after all of that empathising, after all the tragic backstory and yes, Bad Things happened to you, Laudna, i get it, i think it is completely possible that even if Delilah weren't riding shotgun in her head, Laudna would be just as much of a mess--i just think it would happen much more slowly, with less bang and more whimper. Delilah just turns up the volume on the ugly.

conversely, i feel there's also cognitive dissonance within Laudna in that she doesn't want to admit that she's becoming more Delilah, that she's abrogating her own autonomy and giving slivers of herself up. because she's worked so hard, recently, to be herself, to become herself and feel comfortable in her own skin. because she has friends that worked so hard to bring her back, friends who don't run from her scariness, friends who like her and want to be around her and who understand even just a little about how awful the world can be to the smallfolk who live in it. and if she admits that Delilah is beginning to suffuse her, then all that work and effort and time? means nothing, doesn't it? means Laudna isn't worth it, means that her self is just something to be absorbed and used and ground into dust. so she clings to the idea of I'm fine, I know what I'm doing, this is my choice because the alternative is too awful to think about.

all that being said, all she had to do with Orym was say 'Can we talk about that sword? Cause it gives me the ick.'

[amethystina]

Chapter 38 could have been the beginning of the end of Who Holds the Devil

(Slight spoilers for the chapter below)

The other day, as I was editing the chapter, my wife asked me if I was having another existential crisis (I was apparently making very worrying noises) and while I said no at first, I had to change my answer a split second later.

Yes, I was having an existential crisis.

Because I had just realised that if I deviated from my original plan for chapter 38, I could cut the rest of Who Holds the Devil in half. Or even cut so much as three fourths, if I felt like it. Sure, that would require scrapping the overarching storyline I've been building, throwing out a lot of the character development I've planned, as well as rushing through a lot of the healing/trauma work required for my original storyline, but it was possible.

Basically, if Ga On had opened that door, everything would be different. Or, for that matter, if Yo Han had heard him crying (which he didn't — sorry to those of you who hoped that he did). Because even if they had argued and Yo Han was hurt, he would go to Ga On without hesitation if he heard him crying outside his door. Because he loves him too much not to.

Point being, if they had actually talked there at the end of chapter 38, everything I have built towards would have toppled like one of Yo Han's card houses. Because Ga On would have said just about anything to right the mistakes he'd just made. And while that might sound like a good thing, it's not. Because Yo Han wouldn't take that as Ga On expressing genuine feelings for him, but Ga On panicking due to his abandonment issues. He'd think Ga On was just doing whatever he could think of in order to make Yo Han stay, including lying or gaslighting himself into thinking he's in love with Yo Han.

It wouldn't actually have helped all that much, is what I'm saying, because that's not a good foundation for a relationship.

But I COULD have done it. I could have cut down the amount of time I have left to spend on this fic so drastically that, yes, it gave me an existential crisis xD

Partly because this fic has become a huge part of my life in general — to the point where I'm not quite sure who I would be without it — but also because I realised that I was tempted. A part of me wanted to do it. Because every chapter takes everything between 10 to 30 hours to finish when you count all the writing and editing — though several times I've ended up closer to 40 (which is a lot while juggling a full-time job and long Covid). I've written 38 chapters so far and it has taken over two years. And I can't say how much further I will have to go — how many more chapters or years I'm going to have to dedicate to this fic in order to actually finish it.

So, if only for one evening, the thought of cutting it short was VERY tempting.

But, clearly, I didn't in the end. Partly because I still love this fic so incredibly much and I want to write it as it's meant to be written. Also, it would have felt like such a waste to throw away all those plot threads I've been weaving because of... idk, laziness? And I would have to force Ga On and Yo Han together before either of them are ready for it, which would result in a much more fragile relationship in general.

So, long story short, that's why Ga On didn't open the door. I know it may have seemed cruel of me not to let him while you were reading it but, if I had done it, everything would have changed — and not necessarily for the better. Not to mention that you would have gotten a whole lot less fic in the end xD

So yeah. I made the choice to stick to my original plan but, hopefully, it will be worth it in the end.

Thank you for your patience :)

[the-crimson]

Q!BBH and Generational Trauma

For a long time this has been something I’ve noticed in the halo family that I’ve strongly related to. Idk if it’s an intentional theme bbh and Dapmin (and pommin but im mainly gonna focus on Dapper) put into their characters but it’s definitely there. So heres my perspective on bbh’s character arc so far observed through a lens of generational trauma.

(Quick side note. Writing this post was a journey tm and my initial view of bbh and god’s relationship and what the afterlife scene meant shifts dramatically half way through XD)

Even if a parent does everything right, they will still hurt their children. It’s part of the job. It’s part of life. Even if we choose to be better than our parents, the scars they left will bleed onto our children. I think every family has an element of generational trauma - I certainly do but im not gonna trauma dump on yall - but the severity of it is a spectrum.

Q!bbh was cast from his home due to the conditional love of God/the Father and this has left a clear impact on him. His self worth is in the gutter and he lacked a sense of purpose. According to everything we know of bbh’s life before the island, he didnt really care for much of anything other than finding the next source of entertainment - i mean, he remembers the salem witch trials fondly because of the drama of it all regardless of the fact that hundreds of innocent women were murdered.

Was God being intentionally cruel or abusive? Probably not. From His perspective, he may see casting his angels from heaven as a temporary punishment - like spanking a child for throwing a tantrum - without really understanding the damage such treatment is actually doing. He isnt teaching his children the lesson he thought he was just as spanking a child doesnt teach them to behave, only to fear. Bbh redeemed himself in the eyes of the Father and thus was granted the choice to return home. The Father was doing his child a kindness, he was welcoming his lost angel back home because what fallen angel would ever choose anything other than Elysium? And thats the point of conflict. The Father thinks he is doing right by his child but hes only causing bbh more pain. Bbh has to choose between his own children and eternal salvation (that he knows can be taken away on a whim). His heart has been severed in two.

Bbh’s wounds from his disownment run so deep he doesnt even notice them and thus, doesnt notice how they impact his children. Dapper has taken after so many of bbh’s characteristics and a complete lack of self worth is one of them. Selflessness to the point of self annihilation. The fear of being a burden. The need to feel useful otherwise why am i even alive? Dapper was borderline suicidal because they felt useless and nearly killed themself trying to be useful by farming soul hearts and they learned all of this behavior from Bad. Bbh showed Dapper unconditional love but it wasnt enough. Bbh couldnt save Dapper from his own trauma.

Breaking cycles of generational trauma takes more than just realizing how you were raised didnt work and trying something else. Bbh never healed from the wounds left by the Father and thus they were passed down to his own son.

When i started writing this analysis, i thought that this was the tragedy between bbh and the Father. God was too stuck in his ways to understand what His child needs, what would truly make bbh happy. I thought that the Father had not changed. His love remained conditional. Bbh could only come home if he chose god/heaven. The door might be closed next time. This is his only chance of coming home. But now after laying it all out like this… it made me wonder why the Father decided now of all times was when bbh redeemed himself. My initial cynical reading was that the Father was putting bbh through a test of loyalty. He only truly earned his redemption if he would abandon his children in favor of god/heaven but now… i can see a more hopeful reading.

God watched bbh become a father. He watched bbh become a better person through fatherhood. He also watched as the trauma He caused was passed onto bbh’s child. If the Father wanted bbh to come home because he’d redeemed himself, then the Father could have snapped bbh away at any time. Perhaps thats what He would have done 14,000 years ago when bbh first fell. What if the Father recognized his mistake? What if this was His attempt to fix things after seeing just how much damage He’d done? What if he did finally understand what bbh truly needed?

Bbh was stuck in his trauma because he lacked agency in his current state. The Father still had all the power between them by holding heaven hostage. The only way bbh could ever start to heal from this damage was if he was given back the choice that was made for him. Bbh needed to choose one way or another in order for him to take the first step towards healing even if it causes him anguish in the moment. He needed the choice. He needed the freedom to refuse.

But giving freedom to your children can be scary. What if they make the wrong choice? What if they screw up and ruin everything? For a god who expects perfection from his children, freedom must be terrifying. Giving His children freedom means giving them the option to turn away from him. But that is part of being a parent.

What if unlocking the gates was an apology? Im sorry i hurt you. Im sorry i made this choice for you. I see you. I wont take this choice from you again. Its too late to change the past but you can change the future. Dont make my same mistakes.

What if it was a gift? God relinquished his leverage over bbh and gave him the option to come home. An opportunity for bbh to break the cycle. A chance for bbh to make a choice for himself for once. To free him of the shackles that tied him to God. To heal and stop his own son from continuing the cycle of generational trauma.

After all, the greatest gift a god can give is the freedom to choose one’s own destiny.

[luffythinker]

What do you think Shigaraki's favorite things are? Like I know he says he hates everything but what kinds of foods and things do you think he likes?

I think he likes Gamer food and all that but I want a deeper dive then that. Like do you think he likes candy? Sour or sweet? What's his favorite soda? I know he drinks it straight from one of those big bottles and can never finish it. XD do you think he likes greasy food? Or does it hurt his stomach? What foods just dont agree with him? What he allergic to? Peanuts cause that's so basic but also a common food that everyone is probably surprised he cant eat and now that he mentioned it they never can remember him eatting whatever it is.

I think Shig is a briefs wearer, nothing else no undershirt but Dabu wears undershirts and so does Twice. Unfortunately Himiko wasn't raided correct enough to feel comfortable wearing stuff like that but she likes the look of pretty bras and panties but cant bring herself to wear them, she just wears a sports bra and boxers she wishes she could wear them tho.

Dabi and Twice are the only ones who'll sit around shirtless, moreso Dabi then Twice, Dabi sags, Shigaraki's trans ass admires their gender so hard, at first couldnt bring himself to be shirtless around them but when he got comfortable on a bit day he just fuck it, took his shirt off.

Whether or not he had top surgery at the time meant nothing cause the league accepts him for who he is but I would like to say he has had it.

Himiko thinks Shigs top scars are cool

I think Dabi would be that meme where a person is like "would you date a trans women" and the other person is like "is she thick?" And the first person is like "but she was a man before." And they are like "that doesn't matter shes a women now, is she thick?" Have you seen that one before? Dabi is very bisexual he does not care his priorities are the only thing that's straight

I wanna get to know these people on a personal (spiritual) level

I think you already did the deep dive you were looking for kjdfjkdfjkdf better than i ever could tbh

I can't really think of his favorite things like this off the top of my head, but going of what you pointed here, let's try to think something. So about food first: thinking a favorite food for him is hard because of his upbringing and then poverty, but i like to think he would like sweet things (not extremely sweet, but yk), so maybe a cake? something that still is a good memory from his childhood. He likes candy, especially strawberry flavored ones, but that sounds lame so he lies and says he prefers sour stuff. I would just go with cola for him, cause yk he's a gamer and lowkey unhealthy, so a lot of ramen and cola when he pulls all night to play LOL. Not all greasy food, but mostly fries, he loves those, he would eat a bucket everyday if he could. For some reason my first thought for foods he doesn't like was seafood but he's japanese so that would limit his choices a lotkjkjdf but maybe he doesn't like extremely spicy stuff, it upsets his stomach. As for allergies, I'm gonna project here and say he has a corn allergy (idk how common corn is in japan, but where i live it's really everyday food so i have a lot of trouble with this).

And for the rest, i really don't have many additional thoughts on it, i can totally see the things you said here, especially with being shirtless around the league, i think he would be less shy bc of breast/chest and more bc he thinks he doesn't have a good fit body, but well dabi is half burned so he assumes nobody really cares about this

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

ooh I've been meaning to mention this to you: if you're still doing the arcana playlist—but even if you aren't have you ever heard of Enneagram by Sleeping at last? It presents songs meant to represent the nine Enneagram personalities! I love listening to it and thinking of ✨scenarios✨ lmao. The songs are just so so so gooood

One that really makes me giddy is Eight because it makes me think of Muriel (so of course I'd love it lmao). I know I typically include a whole rant about each of the songs but like the first time I listened to Eight really just.... hit me you know? Like ugh the vulnerability the tenderness.... just listen to it please I know Muriel is supposed to be 6w5 but I think that's just trying to assign the Enneagram to the mbti personality type. Idk I think (based on the songs) Six and Eight really just fit Muriel.

And for Asra? Nine. Absolutely Nine. "I've been living half myself for more than half my life." Asra Is very Nine—Nine and Two; Though I can see Nine and Two Applying to MC as well if you focus more on those romantic aspects "Wake up, fall in love, again and again and again..." (9)—oh but I could see Seven applying to Portia and Asra as well.

oh and I just wanted to mention Maybe it Lucio stans would disagree with me, but like Lucio has to be a Three right? Please if you love Lucio I wanna know if you think it fits lol. Also just listen to Three in General I swear you won't regret it. Whether or not you like Lucio just listen to Three please please please.

oooh and also; you don't have to, but if you can spare the time, I'd love to hear what two enneagram assignments you'd give to each of the characters based on these songs.

@paperstarwriters ooh I have heard of that song series!! And this is the part where I sheepishly admit that I know next to nothing about enneagram types - I tried taking the test myself a while back when all my friends were into it, and I kept getting a different result each time? I ended up so confused that I just decided to wait until someone had the time and investment to explain it to me XD

I did think about trying to get into it again when I was researching the characters, but I couldn't find any official assignments so I gave up :')

However, I am definitely interested in listening through those songs when I find the time and seeing which characters fit them!

Thank you for the essay friend, you know I always love reading them, and I'll be putting your suggestions on the list! ^.^

[marzonomy]

Hello it is I, the anonymous b!tch!! XD

Could you do a lil something of EJ x cannibal reader going on a mini picnic date in an abandoned building? Idk I think it would be cute (⁠◡⁠ ⁠ω⁠ ⁠◡⁠) Xx

Hey I meant to write this earlier but I wa super fucking high again

E.J. x Cannibal Reader

Prompt: Abandoned building picnic <3

You step in through the busted concrete doorframe, noticing a particular lack of dust for such a run-down abandoned building.

You're not even sure what it was supposed to be. A church? A facility?

That didn't matter though. As you step inside, it doesn't take long for you to see him.

He's sitting in what might have been the lounging area (judging solely based on size), a large blanket underneath him.

He's got baskets full of fresh meat. Although you know better, anyone else might've guessed it was from an animal.

You sit in front of him as he smiles, biting into what you assume to be a kidney.

Despite loving the taste of human flesh, you prefer the muscles. That's where meat comes from, after all.

So you're not too knowledgeable about organs.

You grab a slab of meat, sinking your piercing canines into the tender remains.

It's not long before an hour an half passes, and Jack is picking up the picnic.

You kiss him goodbye as you both part your seperate ways upon entering the manor, receding to your designated rooms.

You stare at the ceiling with smile for a few minutes before Jack enters.

He sits next to you, holding your hand.

The noon turns to night as you giggle and laugh with him, not realizing how much time had past.

Soon enough, you enter your bed.

As you doze off, you feel him sliding under the covers with you, placing a small kiss to your forehead.

'Goodnight, my love.'

[ganondoodle]

Hello! I hope you are doing well. I have been following your concepts on [cursed bird app] for a while now and find your stance on the totk rewrite intruiging. Since twitter ofc is never a good place to elaborate on anything lmao, I figured I would ask on here after finding out about your tumblr.

You are welcome to take as much time as you need for this, but I was very curious to hear more about why you feel totk 'fails as a sequel' in terms of writing. I can agree that the whole zonai thing did come out of left field a little, and I never did like the whole "zelda is once again separated from you for 90% of the game," bit (bc c'mon Nintendo again? Really??) but I was curious about what else you found dissatisfaction in and sought to redo

If your plan though is to do so gradually as you go with the new rewrite concepts you piece together and post, that is fine too. I just get more curious about your opinion bc you always seem to have a *lot* you want to say outside of just tag ramblings xD

Thank you for your time, ik this is a rather long ask, but your view is very vast and different, and I wish to understand the development of it more as I find it on my timeline

Thank you for this ask!

i have talked alot about the things i dislike about totk, all my general talking (not just about totk tho) is tagged with "ganondoodles talks" and all my longer rants should be tagged with "ganondoodles rants" (tho that tag is new idk if i remembered to put it everywhere) so i think it might be easier if you searched for these on my blog bc thats were all my ramblings go and, with no ill intent, have talked about it so much already i kinda dont want to spend hours writing out something that just ends up repeating myself really

somethign i can say that the main thing on why it fails as a sequel to me is .. bc its not .. a sequel really, it reuses map and models but doesnt elaborate on anything from botw (the zonau were barely even a thing in botw and now in totk their stuff looks way different and they have been here all along actually(tm) ) the shiekah stuff is basically erased despite it having been so build into the world of botw (and you could have just .. explored them more bc theres lots of cool stuff to do with them still), characters act weirdly off, stuff that was seemingly build up and was a perfect slide into a sequel either gets ignored or just straight up erased, themes dont match up at all and more

it just feels like they tested the glue mechanic for 3 years and everything else was an afterthought, i felt empty at the end, in a bad way, it felt like the game was actively mocking me for caring so much about botw at times and totk actively hurts botw too imo (with some reveals etc)

they should have just called it an alternative dimension thing like majora and half my complaints could be dismissed, but its not so im super frustrated bc i love botw a ton

if there are more specific questions you are free to ask about it again of course! this is not meant to sound dismissive but me typing out stuff can take a long time and im behind on so much work already qnq

also all development both visual and writing concepts for my rewrite are tagged with "ganondoodles rewrites totk" so you can find everything with that too :D

[mako-neexu]

smut fic so crazy i have to document my thoughts no matter how incomprehensible. (delusion below)

that kind of love is delicious. but idk where to start... theres so much to say.. but i guess ill do it level by level like in the novel? nah, i think i will do it randomly..

but of course, what i like the most was the way the 'game' is set. where ritsuka could get one favor/help from oberon each level in the dungeon. but the condition is that he won't be by her side unless she calls for him to help her. which is seriously??? makes me insane. iirc she had a line where she said while in the 2nd or 3rd floor (i think) that "It's almost as if Oberon wants me to depend on him..." the dynamic is making me throw up from so much excitement. i also like how he made her vocal about what she wants www even if she got assaulted by tentacles or that one lewd mors (which was honestly creative lmao like jp fandom is a genius ww), the half-helplessness she feels pushed her into calling for his name (sometimes with those sighs 😉) and request for help from the 'torture' she 'suffered' from.

ALSO theres that midsummer night's dream title that changed from D to EX like that was really hot asfkjdghlk like assimilation with oberon.. later turns into being the same as him and her soul fully belonging to him as his mate. ritsuka's body is remade to be the same as him like sdkjbskjdfgjkf

i thinked what shocked me the most was the 'safe room' level. i knew something was up but as soon as i saw how ritsuka was so frantic to drink the water and fruits prepared by oberon, the end notes shocked me??? i LOVE IT so much kasjdfkjdsfgh so thats why the title gained was 'gochisousama'. apparently they were from the autumn forest itself and it reminded me that you should NOT eat what a fairy offers or else.. of course we know the consequences. but according to the end notes, its for the sake of loneliness, of hunger, of this distance from oberon that made her suddenly crave for him so much that she couldnt help but consume what he prepared..i also like how he included a bunch of sex toys dkjfdkjgjkbdjkf my face feels so hot reading it i love it so much..

during the progression of the levels, ritsuka also acquired blue markings on her back which is butterfly shape marking asfljdfgjh which meant that, of course, her body and soul is being tainted in oberon's.. (i think this solidified further when the mors came inside her ww)

but what made me laugh was the marriage contract XD he also wrote it in probably british? or what fairy language is used in morgan's kingdom www still the method to sign it was just both delicious and bizarre www

still, the way the game is set is just??? i love it too much. oberon pushed her in 'his' direction but still made sure she had room to decline and go back. but the exit was already obvious since you only have to go back and the 'dungeon' only led to the bottom which was the opposite of a way out- or rather.. she refused to think about it and resolved to meet oberon- see the real oberon instead of the illusions themself, who she wanted to see. the end, the conclusion, fulfilled by her desires which the flames were fanned by oberon when he set this up.

near the end, the lantern still gave her hope, which would have been the perfect entrance for artoria to bust oberon's ass and save ritsuka ww but this is between obeguda, with the goal of claiming ritsuka's entirety for oberon and 'returning' to that abyss where separation is nonexistent.

"I don't want to betray this light..." That lantern still burned in the end after all. But oberon's question really was a nail in the coffin ww

"If that's the case then I'll ask you," Oberon's voice quietly trembled, "Where in the world is that hope(light) of yours?"

and the words broke ritsuka??? so good.. askjfhsdjkgh the light shined the way to move forward. but 'forward' to where? if the exit and the outside world is that way, why didnt this light point the way? why did the light keep shining so brightly? why was that light burning? and the sense of resignation and defeat washed over her. she doesnt even know why she ended up in such a place the moment she was at the final floor. the feeling of despair was delicious it was so great im clawing at my chest...!!!!

she could only stutter with that feeling of despair! as she tries to find a reason for that lantern that she carried with her!!!

and its just like in the garden!!!! the garden!!!!! "It's alright, Ritsuka. That's enough. You can relax now. Whether its over or still in the middle of it, you can let go." you can finally be free. you can rest easy. so just rely on me. you've done enough!!!

there was also that "fallen star" title. i think its the best. it really does remind me of lb6's ending and his views on titania ueueue

seriously this kind of courtship... www it also reminds me of kairi's previous works which included a similar theme.. but this time three authors worked on it so thanks for the collab yomoko-san, kanonige-san and kairi-san herself