#idk what kind of lead my mom was eating in the womb but here i am

[snobgoblin]

Boy you really like green people

SIR YES SIR 🫡 in this house we stand for the flag

[sebongie-loves]

birthday wish

OKAY BOYFRIEND!JISOO AND CHILDHOOD FRIEND!JISOO IDK HOW TO PUT THIS TOGETHER BUT THIS IS IT

words: 1.5k

since our softest man is having his birthday, first i want to wish him all the happiness in the world because he deserves it and his health. second, i think it must be right too write something about him so enjoy! < 3

to start everything off, you have known jisoo for as long as you can remember. he has always been around you since forever, which you are grateful of

apparently your mother knew his mother? 

his mother helped your mother alot during her pregnancy since jisoo is two years older than you which also means his mother got some experience 

when they found out about your gender, his mother said that it must be easier to rise you because you’re a girl but she did not know that her son gonna be like a total angel

also jokingly said things like, ‘let’s set their marriage starting from now’ ‘let’s put them on an arraged marriage’ which is something just to joke about between your mom and his

little jisoo is exactly the first person that you saw when you were fresh from the womb beside your parents, doctor and the nurses. it has not been long since he has his baby steps yet he ran to your room, leaving his mother behind. jisoo was excited because he knew his mother’s bestfriend’s gonna have a little human so

“where’s the little person? i wanna see!” 

so that’s the first time he saw you and ever since that he never left your side

you two play pretty well like jisoo is the calm one and he protects you when you’re like the wild one 

one time jisoo and you were playing outside the house, it was pretty chill because like you two live in a place where not many people pass by and you fell and cried. good thing jisoo understood what’s happening so he’s like ‘y/n don’t cry! hop on my back let’s go home. it’s okay!’ 

you LOVE to force your mother to go to his and play with him because it’s the most fun 

you probably won’t never go to preschool if it wasn’t for him 

as you two grow older, the more you two realized that he is a boy and you’re a girl and there’s this invisible line that no one crossed over

it all started when you go to his house and barge into his room with him changing his clothes. you were a middle schooler when he was a freshman in highschool

it’s not like jisoo was mad at you because he was a hormonal teen, he would never be mad at you. sure he has his moment of being angsty and like rebel but not with you. he always remains the same, the gentle and kind jisoo 

“y/n just because we know each other for a long time, don’t barge in like that next time okay? i’m still a boy. knock.” he says with a smile and messes your hair 

what a sleepless night that was 

you remembered you slept at 4 am, blanket kicking and blushed cheeks from thinking back

you’re starting to be aware of that when jisoo is the one who started first, 

probably because he was older or because he once went to your house and barge in just the way you did but instead of seeing you changing, he saw you sleeping helplessly

again, jisoo at that time was a hormonal teenager and cannot help whatever across his mind so he acted quick and put a blanket over you and just sat on the corner of your bed, hiding his flushed cheeks on the palm of his hands before finally deciding to go home

that’s how jisoo learnt the art of knocking

you two visit each other’s house often, like just having lunch or just whenever you needed help with homeworks or just when you needed someone to talk and someone that you trust

he always has this little feeling for you, not much, just like a flicker of fire. jisoo can make it bigger and stronger but at that time he chose not to and dated this girl instead. dick move obviously but that’s his attempt to blow out the flicker of fire

you cried when you found out because literally everyone in your family and his knew you have feelings for him which’s more obvious than his

he was your prince and he still is your prince and you used to think you’re his only princess. selfish, indeed. what can you say though? you’re crushing on this boy so much

so you avoided him for a couple while until you finally decided like you cannot be like this and talked to him like usual 

“just think of him like he is my older brother!!!!!!!!!”

and when his gf found out, she’s mad at you for being close with him and slapped you. which ended up you, seeing jisoo yelled at someone and super mad at the person

they ended up broke up. you did feel guilty but everytime you said sorry, jisoo’d be like ‘if she cannot accept you what can i do?’ 

because you are his everything without him knowing

one day, when he was going out on a festival he got scouted by korean agency which he is unexpectedly very excited about. you always know tho, he’s into singing and musics

it was hard when he moved out to korea

your mother often found you cried yourself to sleep which is so heartbreaking for him

you two still talk through skypes or free messager because texts are expensive and time difference is a bitch

right after you graduated, your mother just like, ‘i cannot see you sad anymore like this just go to korean college i’ll support you’

you flied to korea for a week trip to look around at the universities and met jisoo there

he was preparing for his debut but jisoo is a nice guy so he still helped you to find universities 

when you finally moved there for sure, he already made his debut like you legit sobbing when you saw him on skype and when you see him face to face 

the members knew about your presence but it’s hard to talk with you because the language barrier. so you can only talk with hansol but as time goes by, you naturally learnt korean 

2017 is wild

he finally confessed to you and finally you two are couples

despite his busy schedules, at midnight he would’ve sneak into your apartment. wishing there’s no reporter around which thankfully you two never broke out a scandal 

it’s hard because jisoo only has been in this industry for three years and if the press found out it would bring more harm to group

you two would eat dinner together even though sometimes they almost called midnight snacks because it’s too late, watch movies together while cuddling and turned into a sweet make out session and probably him singing you serenades or telling you funny things that were happening between him and his members

december is yours and jisoo’s favourite month, especially this year

it’s the first year you and jisoo spending it as couple

you sneaked in to svt’s dorm just to cook and eat together for christmas because there are the one that cannot go back because of the tight schedules or the airfare 

and ended up with you staying over

regarding his birthday,

you read somewhere, he said he wishes to rest during his birthday but it’s impossible due to his schedule

despite that you still want to celebrate his birthday as his girlfriend because usually it’s just a family celebration but this time it’s different

so with the help of the members everything is possible

you sneaked in to the dorm with a cake and foods

just right after svt finishes their schedule, the gayo daejun they have to attend, seungkwan just texts you saying ‘we’re on our way back!! get ready!”

so you hide in his room with the light off and a cake and a match 

when they arrived, you put on the fire and seungcheol baited jisoo saying things like ‘jisoo-ya let me borrow your stuff’ which leading him to be the first one that entered the room 

when he opens the door, his heart fucking drops

“happy birthday, jisoo!”

he was probably scared of his room being dark and there are the age candle thingy no jk

he just laughs like so happy while covering his mouth with his hand in disbelief

“oh lord y/n i don’t even think you’d be here because you said you’d be sleeping after wishing me a birthday”

“prince don’t make a long speech please i don’t want the candle to melt on the beautiful cake. make a wish!”

jisoo chuckles. his gaze almost make you weak 

fortunately he closes his eyes and makes a wish 

clearly he took his time before finally opening his eyes and blowing the candle which followed by you cheering at him

you put the cake on the table, thinking that you want to give him a hug but instead a question popped up your mind

“what do you wish for?”

you asked innocently, which followed by him lowering his stance, matching your height with his and leaning closer to your face

“to be with you forever.”

followed by his lips reaching for yours and a small smile in between. his arms wrapped around your body, allowing you to smell your favourite scent which is his. 

“happy birthday, my prince.”

I HOPE IT’S NOT TOO CHEESY AND THIS IS A QUICK WRITING WITH A RANDOM IDEA BURST SO I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS AND THANK YOU FOR READING!! < 3 

AND AGAIN, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HONG JISOO ILYSM

[blackmenconfessions]

Confession:

The whole “a Black boy needs a male influence in his life” thing makes me roll my eyes so hard.

Like, 99% of the reason I don’t want to come out to my mom, is because I know she’ll automatically jump on that whole “omg it’s my fault for not letting your dad in your life.”

Here’s the thing: My dad was in my life. He influenced my life even before I was born. Like that time he strangled my mom while I was in the womb.

My dad was an abusive asshole who raped my mom regularly. I fucking hate him with a passion. And yet, he keeps popping up. I feel JEALOUS of kids that never met their dads. Cuz yeah, he took care of me sometimes. I’ve lived with him, he’s helped me with college related expenses, and pays for my phone. But that doesn’t change the fact that everytime I was a kid and thought “maybe my life could be good and normal now” any of the few times my parents were actually living together, he’d either immediately start messing around with some other woman, start beating my mom again, or both.

And he didn’t just abuse my mom. Nah, I wouldn’t say he physically abused me (yeah, he spanked me, and yeah I guess that’s technically abuse but….idk I just don’t see it as such when it happened to me, since I pretty much deserved it for the most part), but he did abuse me psychologically. Like, people would blame my being queer on my mom “babying” me or whatever before they’d stop and think that maybe, just MAYBE, constantly belitling a kid, calling him a bitch, and never showing any real affection is going to have some kind of affect.

Like, I want away from my dad. If I could, I’d send back everything he ever bought for me and change my last name and everything. Yeah, Id miss my cousins and shit, since they were always decent to me, but it’s what ever, I hate him more. But I can’t. Because my mom wants me to have a positive male role model or whatever.

But like….I did know dudes growing up. Lots of them. Because my mom tried to make sure that I did. She wanted me to have male influence since I lived with her and not with my dad most of the time. But all my experience with dudes has taught me is…they don’t care about anyone.

90% of the older males I knew growing up.were my DAD’S friends. Because he was convinced that if my mom had any male friends of her own, she’d cheat (even though he’s the reason I always say “two…that I know of” when people ask how many siblings I have). Every other dude that she knew was either too concerned with their own families to help us out, or were on bullshit. And her family hates her cuz they hate dark-skin people, so none of our male relatives ever did anything for us either. My mom was being beaten by my dad regularly and none of those asses stepped in to help. And whenever they weren’t living together, whenever my mom was actually trying to provide for me and my sister so she COULD finally leave him for good? We’d be in our house starving and none of them would even give us a loaf of bread.

No wait, I’m wrong. My mom has one friend that actually cares about her and tried to help her out as best he could. But he’s an effeminate, bisexual man, so I guess he doesn’t count. (Before y'all start, no he never “influenced” me. I knew about myself before she’d even met him.)

So yeah, fuck this idea that Black boys need a positive male role-model. Literally every one of the dudes I knew growing up are the idea of what’s “positive”. They were college educated, respectable business people. They had families. They went to church. And they didn’t care about me at all. But when I come out finally? Or when I start to actually get help for my MANY psychosis (and no, dumbass, me being queer has nothing to do with hearing voices)? NO ONE will be able to stop talking about this positive male role-model shit.

Literally every dude that factored in to my life being the shitstorm it was, is a “positive Black role model”. Even if you discount my dad (although two high schools, three colleges and four elementary schools he taught at would disagree with you), that still leaves all the well-educated, family-providing, white collar niggas that sat around shaking their heads and saying “God will fix everything” when my mom was being locked in a closet or starving herself so my sister and I could eat.

Nah, I didn’t have a positive male role model growing up. But that’s not on my mom. And really, I don’t NEED one. I entered college at sixteen, I’ve never been to jail, and I don’t have five baby mama’s. All Black dudes in my life ever gave me was about 5 different mental disorders.

And don’t try to turn this into some “ahh, why you hating on Black dudes.” Cuz I’m not. I don’t hate y'all. I DEFEND y'all, probably more than I should, but I do it anyway. But I’m calling all of us out on this bullshit. Because not one of my male friends can honestly say that they love their dad, or that they’d want to lead the same example with their own kids that their dad set for them.

Being a good dad to YOUR kid isn’t enough. I SAW lots of good dads growing up, but I still didn’t have one. I want the Deadbeat Black Dad stereotype to die. You want this stereotype about not-shit Black dads to end? Then you gotta be a good dad even for the kids that DON’T have them. And we gotta stop discounting that, yes, a Black woman CAN raise a Black man on her own, cuz all.she has to do is point out the not-shit niggas surrounding them and say “don’t be like him”.

[neoatlanticmooses]

1: Is there a boy/girl in your life? Kind of. Right. Yeah. It's my dog. Good boy. 2: Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them? Sure. I'm fast to move on in most cases because I know that only thing life can promise me is change 3: What do you think of when you hear the word “meow?” 13 year old scene kids 4: What’s something you really want right now? A long hike to the top of a cliff and tequila. 5: Are you afraid of falling in love? Most definitely not. I jump head first. 6: Do you like the beach? I like looking at it. I'm not a fan of sand. 7: Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else? I have. 8: What’s the background on your cell? My mom and I 9: Name the last four beds you were sat on? Amanda's, mine, my mom's, and a friend's air mattress. 10: Do you like your phone? Team IPhone. 11: Honestly, are things going the way you planned? For the most part, the things I can control are going great. Other than that I go with the flow. 12: Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts? Tate from Spanish class. 13: Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler? Rottweiler. 14: Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain? Emotional pain. 15: Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum? Art Museum. 16: Are you tired? Not really. 17: How long have you known your 1st phone contact? My entire life. My mom. 18: Are they a relative? I CAN from the womb of this woman. 19: Would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes? It may or may not be happening. We'll see. 20: When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with? The same day I kissed them. 21: If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? I think thats so abrupt. No 22: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Nope. 23: How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? One. 24: Is there a certain quote you live by? "Do what is right, not what is easy." 25: What’s on your mind? Exams, art, sex. 26: Do you have any tattoos? Currently only 1. 27: What is your favorite color? Red, but lately neutral greens. 28: Next time you will kiss someone on the lips? Possibly this week. 29: Who are you texting? Currently ATM no one. 30: Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch? No. 31: Have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right? All the time. I have a good sense about things. 32: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? Definitely. 33: Do you think anyone has feelings for you? I'd hope so lol or else the situation is kind of weird 34: Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes? It's happened before. 35: Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you? What about it. Atleast they're not shagging on the carpet. 36: Were you single on Valentines Day? Yes, but I went on a lovely date and ever since we've gone out almost every week so idk what this is. 37: Are you friends with the last person you kissed? No. 38: What do your friends call you? Larissa, Porkrind, asshole. 39: Has anyone upset you in the last week? Not on a personal level. Customers are bitches. 40: Have you ever cried over a text? Sure have. 41: Where’s your last bruise located? My shin. 42: What is it from? Banging it on a concrete statue. 43: Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad? Probably an anxious day at work. 44: Who was the last person you were on the phone with? My mom. 45: Do you have a favourite pair of shoes? YES. I love my chucks. 46: Do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day? Nope. Unless it's super cold outside. 47: Would you ever go bald if it was the style? I'd go bald just to do it. I'm not a person to keep up with trends. 48: Do you make supper for your family? Most of the week days. 49: Does your bedroom have a door? Yeah. I need privacy. 50: Top 3 web-pages? Pandora, Facebook, YouTube. 51: Do you know anyone who hates shopping? Probably me most of the time. 52: Does anything on your body hurt? My shoulders, biceps, and ankle. 53: Are goodbyes hard for you? Sometimes, but I understand that if it's meant to be we'll cross paths again one way or another. 54: What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself? Water. 55: How is your hair? It's fluffy since I washed it. 56: What do you usually do first in the morning? Eat or make my bed. Pee. 57: Do you think two people can last forever? I believe that some people are meant to be in your life until the end even if it's not a romantic relationship, so yes. 58: Think back to January 2007, were you single? I was 10, so yeah. 59: Green or purple grapes? Neither. GRAPES are weird. 60: When’s the next time you will give someone a BIG hug? Tomorrow? Tuesday. 61: Do you wish you were somewhere else right now? Not really. I crave adventure, but my bed calls. 62: When will be the next time you text someone? Tomorrow probably. 63: Where will you be 5 hours from now? Sleeping or studying for a morning exam. 64: What were you doing at 8 this morning. Sleeping or dying of allergies. 65: This time last year, can you remember who you liked? It was complicated. But yes. I remember. 66: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile? My best friend. Always. 67: Did you kiss or hug anyone today? I hugged my mom today for a bit because I wasn't feeling well. 68: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night? Probably how sleepy I was. 69: Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? Not really. I'm not easy to give up on things, so when I let things go, I know there's a very good reason for me to. 70: How many windows are open on your computer? 3 at a time all the time. 71: How many fingers do you have? 10 72: What is your ringtone? The default tone of This Love. 73: How old will you be in 5 months? Still 20. 74: Where is your Mum right now? In the livingroom. 75: Why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love? Because it wasn't meant to be, but what I can say is that all the people I love and want in my life are here atm and that's all I need. 76: Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days? Yeah. 77: Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago? Most of them, yeah. Some of them have moved on in life and I'm happy for their success and achievements. 78: Do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7? Lol yeah. 79: Is there anyone you know with the name Mike? All of my male neighbors except for one have the name Mike by coincidence. 80: Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms? Definitely. 81: How many people have you liked in the past three months? 2? I'd lean towards 1 in a serious manner. 82: Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days? Not that I know of. 83: Will you talk to the person you like tonight? Nah. It's late and he's sleeping. 84: You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with? No one because I don't act ignorant when I'm drunk nor do I drive when I'm not sober. 85: If your BF/GF was into drugs would you care? Definitely. I'm big on being healthy, so even smoking is a big deal to me. I don't do smoke breath. 86: What was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie? We went to the tavern with the recliner chairs so it was ultra comfy. 87: Who was your last received call from? My mom. 88: If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you? Probably not. I could care less about money atm. I'd feel way too guilty. Also wtf kind of question is that. 89: What is something you wish you had more of? Windows!! To put my plants in! 90: Have you ever trusted someone too much? Maybe. I can't think of any specific situation off the top of my head. 91: Do you sleep with your window open? I sleep with both windows open. 92: Do you get along with girls? Sometimes. I'm more of a guy's-girl. 93: Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth? Not really. If people ask me about things I tell them blatantly 94: Does sex mean love? No. Love can lead to sex, but sex before love, in my opinion, can make for sticky situations more often than not. 95: You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem? Eh. 96: Have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring? Nope. 97: Did you sleep alone this week? I did and I enjoyed it lol the entire bed to myself. 98: Everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you? Definitely. My best friend, my family, friends from chem class. 99: Do you believe in love at first sight? I feel like a lot of people wouldn't think I would, but I absolutely do. 100: Who was the last person that you pinky promise? A lot of people. Pinky promises are pretty serious in my book