#idk maybe this doesn't need saying but I want to say it anyway
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I don't really have a point here because none of this is strictly canon but the thing about blaming Ford in fanon for not being interested in Fiddleford in the 80s or for choosing Bill over Fidds or for not getting over his internalized homophobia long enough to get dicked down in the bunker or whatever the hell you want to call it, is that... Fiddleford wasn't available.
Fiddleford was married, he had a child. Fiddleford is the one who asked Ford if he ever thought about getting married. Regardless of what other signals Fiddleford was sending at the time or how much or how little Ford accepted them... Ford was always going to be the other man. And maybe Fiddleford is just in a lavender marriage and Emma May understood going in that Fiddleford would be sleeping with other men, but then what does that say about Fiddleford? He's longing for a relationship from so far inside the closet that he has a child. A relationship with a man who's so far in a different closet his boyfriend literally doesn't exist on the material plane.
And what is he expecting from that relationship? Is he going to go back home to Palo Alto and travel back to Gravity Falls for business and a quick fuck? Is he going to leave his wife and child to live with a reclusive scientist in the wilderness? You can "Gravity Falls isn't homophobic in the 80s" all you want but the fact remains that Emma May Dixon exists and needs to be a factor when talking about these ideas from an interpretive standpoint. Fiddleford is a practicing Catholic as of 1982. His entire family is presumably still in Tennessee. Is he expecting to leave that support network behind in favor of Ford, a man who very clearly cannot fill those roles in Fiddleford's life? A fact that becomes infinitely more relevant if we consider the possibility that Fiddleford actually loved Emma May?
Like. Idk I just so rarely see these things get talked about, because usually the idea is that Stanford Pines is Just That Repressed (he is) that he ignored Fiddleford's advances or even flat out rejected them because Bill Cipher was manipulating him (he was) but like...
Even without Bill being involved, even without all the theoretical social pressure, how viable of a romantic option is Fiddleford, anyways? He's either in his Good Luck Babe era or he's actively trying to cheat on a woman he married completely legitimately and who he genuinely loved at one point. How do you make a relationship like that work?
#i say this as someone who violently ships these two#but yeah i think part of the reason bill was able to turn Ford agaisnt Fidds so successfully was#was because of this lingering resentment and paranoia Ford has because like#fiddleford is actively betraying someone who trusts him regardless#either he's going to leave Emma May's closet door wide open in the divorce#or she actually loves him and would be heartbroken to learn that hes cheating on her#even worse if he reciprocates those feelings#it's a betrayal of trust#and we all know how well ford takes those#do i love 80s fiddauthor yes i do#am i surprised in the slightest that it didnt work out until 2012 no sir i am not
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Real quick, not because it's come up or anything, I just want to be pre-emptive about it:
Remember that I'm not the world's leading expert in anything, including kink. Remember to take things I say with a grain of salt and do your own research. I never want to be one of those people who styles themself as an expert and is treated as some sort of guide/leader. For one thing, that's not a power dynamic I'm comfortable with. I'm here to make friends and have fun and spread my love of RACK, not be in charge of anyone (save for moderating the discord).
I happen to know more about queer identities, disability, and kink/bdsm/safe sex than the average person just because they're the three areas I've studied a lot and that most affect my personal life in various ways. But that doesn't mean I'll always be right about everything, or that I'll get across my knowledge well, or that you should just listen to everything I say and take it as fact.
Especially when it comes to kink and bdsm, you should never be teaching others about it just from what you've learned from me, nor should you be practicing it if I'm the only source you've gotten your information from. As a general rule of thumb, never get all your information from one source or believe people just because they usually know what they're talking about. Look for multiple sources, do your own research, remember that there's always going to be different perspectives and everyone has blindspots they don't know about.
So yeah, idk. I just don't wanna be creating weird power dynamics just because I happen to know a lot about kink and like to share my knowledge. And I definitely don't want people engaging in irl kinks based only on what they learn from me, because I've barely brushed the surface of what you need to know before you can safely engage in kink.
Also just because I tease and flirt does not make me anyone's dom. I don't engage in play without negotiation and trust (and friendship or money). If I'm flirting with someone, it's because they've consented to it and they can revoke that consent at any time. But I will never try to engage in actual power exchange here, that would be irresponsible and once again create a power dynamic I'm not comfortable with. I have my limits, and I'll make them clear, so never worry you've accidentally broken them without knowing. And don't worry about trying to defend me, I can defend myself.
#sunshine#idk maybe this doesn't need saying but I want to say it anyway#especially the power dynamic thing#I get uncomfortable when people try to make themselves like... 'leaders' or whatever of fandoms or online spaces#turns real weird and culty real quick and makes it easy for people to be taken advantage of#so I don't wanna be one of those people or encourage people to treat Anyone like that#don't put people on pedestals or make them your leader especially not internet strangers#I'm happy to be a fun silly blog y'all go to and I'm happy to be peoples' favourite writer/blog/whatever#I'm happy for people to enjoy my content and chat with me and ask me questions about kink#I'm happy to educate as best as I can#I'm NOT happy to be taken as a supreme authority on anything tho#I'm just some dumbass I do not deserve that power#also I'm very good at sticking to my boundaries/limits so if I ever respond to something then it means I'm comfortable with it#so like I won't let flirting go any further than I'm comfortable with#which means I don't need people coming into my inbox trying to defend me because they think someone went too far#if they did then I'll let them know myself otherwise it's all good no one needs to worry about it
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Jason who immediately loses respect for people who don't own up to their mistakes vs Annabeth who would rather die than admit she made a mistake
#jason vs annabeth. autism vs npd lol#idk what the outcome is. i don't think they'd fight physically. but jason would get on her ass. and she'd be so fucking pissed abt it#she'd strategize different ways to put him in uncomfortable situations for whatever reason#and he's just vibing through them because he's been uncomfortable his entire life. pretending to be bacon for a monster is not new#anyway jason looking at his dad who's refusing to admit he made some dumb decisions and immediately going this guy is an idiot fuck him#happy talks pjo#npd!annabeth#jason grace#annabeth chase#oh oh annabeth needing everyone to like and trust her and jason's lost respect for her drives her up the fucking wall#she's the only one of the seven who could really be considered friends with all of them and jason's judgy eyes make her want to explode#she 100% rants herself to sleep about things he says. maybe that's where percy and jason's beef arised from#percy recognizing that annabeth is fustrated with jason because jason is blunt and doesn't really know to soften his words.#so now percy is fustrated with jason because annabeth is the source of his personhood right now. meanwhile jason is just vibing oblivious#no social awarenes whatsoever. anyway lol#but oooooo see leo's inferiority complex actually makes him fess up to errors in a way that judges him (jokingly but not really)#even if the error wasn't his fault. but it's his willingness to admit to his mistakes that makes jason really appreciate and trust him#so we have npd!annabeth who can't admit to being wrong because it would kill her ego#and then inferiority complex leo who does admit to being wrong because he hates himself#and when he fucks up he is quick to confess (often in a self-deprecating joke manner) so that no one can say anything that would hurt him#if he kills his ego before other people can even attempt it then he's safe from their judgement in some way#okaaaay bac to studying lol
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I have very specific thoughts about Bruce's 'childhood' and how he tried to do things differently with Dick than what happened with him because of how badly it affected him. He knows what it's like to have everything change so fast and to be so angry but too young to actually do anything about it.
I can see him making sure Dick doesn't get too close of a look at his parents because Bruce remembers being stuck with his parent's corpses until the police got there, all alone with no other way to call for help than screaming. I can see him hiding Dick from the flashing cameras and hiding any newspapers about the 'story' so that Dick doesn't have to see how the press spins everything. Bruce has that picture of himself sitting shellshocked from the ambulance on the front page and he knows how violating that felt, how publicized his trauma was, even if he can't completely prevent it for Dick he can do his best to make it hurt less.
Bruce suffered being helpless for years, being so angry at Gotham and the world and not having a good outlet for it, he had no control over anything that was happening with him, so with DIck he knows how important being Robin became because he knows how becoming Batman felt for him. Bruce got into fights because he couldn't hold his anger in and had to turn that anger inward in fear that Alfred would get sick of him and leave too. Robin was a productive outlet, even if it was a dangerous one, but who knows what would've happened to him if he didn't have it? He already got that taste of freedom and feeling like his intervention could actually make a difference that Bruce took years and years of stewing in trauma to find.
The most important thing to Bruce is that Dick doesn't become another Batman.
#this is the idea I had for a fic where I go between the deaths of Bruces parents and Dicks parents#based on what Bruce did differently than what happened to him#Feat. Alfred not being a great guardian bc the distance between staff and ward is funky#and how that damaged Bruce#Like I don't think Alfred was terrible but I don't think he was parental enough#anyway I want to write the Waynes death scene so badly I think since it's been so ingrained in Batmans lore we stopped thinking about it#anyway in the batman and robin year one where Alfred was like 'you don't have much experience in being a child' made me think#Not saying that Bruce is an amazing parent but I think it would be interesting to focus on what he tried to do differently#I think he realized that Dick needed to be considered an equal and not just some kid who doesn't know anything#bc he was once that kid who everyone dismissed and had no control of his own life#idk I feel like if I've thought enough about this to be a fic i could yap on forever...#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#maybe i could spin it into being in The Batman continuity...
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it's not sinking in that today might be the last day in my house and town for many months to come
#like how do i even feel#on one hand im excited because like now that i finally agreed to dads stupid whims he technically will have to give in to things#ive been wanting since FOREVER like going to the gym#plus it's impossible to eat junk food when he's there he won't even let me kacchi maggi because maida hai bimar ho jayegi#and aadhe se zyada din toh pyaaz ye sab nahi kha sakte so it rules out any outside food#which is so good because like i just found out im pre diabetic lol#like borderline sugar like ab kuch nahi kiya toh seedha type 2 diabetes#so i need to eat healthy or ill literally die#i mean eventually but whatever being diagnosed with this in my 20s would kill me#also simply the fear of living with him is so much that i HAVE to study#and i want to now it's high time#but yeah want doesn't really work for me#i read a quote somewhere that 'goals' don't mean anything because winners and losers have the same goals#and i was like WOAH. like the person who gets an all india rank had the same goal as me: to pass the exam with good marks#but they succeeded and i didn't so it's isn't our goals that differentiate us#which ik is obvious but like still idk put things in perspective#anyway yeah that way my life MIGHT be fixed#but there's also living ALONE with my sociopathic FATHER who has more mood swings than me on pms#and being cut off frm the rest of civilisation and yk developed roads and buildings and ice cream shops#i guess it is mostly food ig :( which is good like the most junk food i can eat there is a burger from a nearby stall and that's pretty#much it they literally do not even have havmor or anything in walking distance forget scoop wali ice cream#but i like my bed and i like my ceiling with the stars and i like looking out of my window and knowing that the first ever crush of my life#lives right next to me and i like knowing that ill meet my bestfriend atleast once a month#i don't really love my mom or my brother tbh but idk maybe ill miss them it's weird ive never lived without them#i don't know i really hope that this is like a boot camp kota types experience rather than so much isolation that i sink deep into#depression. but then ive hit pretty shocking lows this year so hopefully i can handle it#my sister did say that when she lived alone with him for a month it was quite peaceful and okay because he usually gets more angry when mom#is around warna mostly he's fine#i don't know i don't know bhagwan ji please ab aur mushkil mat banana life bohot jhatke de chuke ho already ab pls#mujhe apni galtiyo ko sudharne ka mauka dena 🙏
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My precure color opinions because why not. Don't read if you think you'll be upset reading different opinions, i just wanna put this out there haha😭:
Summer is white, let her be white (this is the one i'm the most passionate about). I didn't even KNOW there was a debate on this until this year, what in the world. None of that rainbow or pink nonsense. I don't even know why she would be classified as rainbow officially. Especially when the color they TRY to force her into is pink (for example saying today's color is pink before the outro). I heard she was created to be white but i don't know the source of that so that might be wrong
i agree with Finale being golden, she gets to be golden as a treat <3. She is not purple, y'all are just mean, compare her to actual purple cures. A golden theme really suits her in my opinion, it's beautiful and elegant like her. There should be more golden cures that have some some golden accents imo :D
Parfait is green to me with rainbow sub-color, i KNOW it makes no sense and she is just a rainbow cure, but that's what she is in my brain somehow acejcdksvd
Cosmo is blue with rainbow sub-color, but SHOULD have been rainbow. Maybe with blue sub-color bc it Does with the team arrangement (also should have had her cat form in cure form but that's beside the point). I heard they WANTED to make her rainbow but weren't allowed?! Unsure about that too though
i haven't seen hugtto yet but ma cherie literally looks so pink acejcdjd. You're red? Whatever you say, girl, you can be anything you wanna be, who am i to tell you otherwise <3
Milky as green is fine, but i see why people want turquoise to just be its own category. I think her color shouldn't look different though, she looks great
similair for Lillian, except that i've seen some people giving her a wonderful light green and she would look gorgeous!
Nyammy can be a blue cure if she wants <3. Especially next to Lillian, it's obvious how white is their base color and they define themselves via the accents. But also she is literally the whitest cure ever made, let alone the whitest blue cure wcejev
Felice is fine as green cure and she's beautiful
there should be more pink non-leaders like Butterfly
bring back black as cure color. Also brown and grey would be gorgeous <3
i actually prefer when cures look kinda colorful and they AREN'T monotone. The main color is really more about the vibe in my opinion, like with Finale and Nyammy haha!
This is all light-hearted, just thought it would be fun to post these bc everyone has Some precure color opinions xD! 🙌 It's so funny how color discourse is such a serious topic in precure fandom CSJDVEK
If anyone wants to share their own opinions, you can tell but please only if it's in good faith 🙏
#precure#pretty cure#pretty cure!#the only ones i'm gonna seriously defend of these are summer and finale#and maybe felice bc idk why people complain about her#he literallylooks like a flower it's beautiful leave her alone 😭🙌#don't let your desire for green cures hate on her lovely multicolored design 😔#*she. about felice#it's just that i don't like the way people are so strict about it.#like ohh she has more than two colors in design so she must be rainbow#or maybe she just has a. good design. but is still color coded as white bc it's the main color of her outfit#I FEEL LIKE THE COLORS AND DESIGNS SHOULD BE EMBRACED AND NOT POLICED SO STRONGLY#i'm also so biased sbout the summer thing bc i heard they specifically didn't want to make a pink cure and wanted a white one instead#which might be wrong but i hope not haha#and the reason i'll defend finale as golden is because i think it's a really cool idea to have a special accent as the 'main' color!#and i think she deserves that and again it's okay to have a design with multiple colors#ANYWAY THE REST IS JUST SILLY SORRY 😭#i just like the creative designs okay and don't think they need to be put down or policed for what they are#like summer just has normal accent colors. she doesn't even have enough colors to be rainbow#in fact the only colors she has that are in a rainbow are yellow and blue so do you see what i'm saying
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at what point should one go and get tested for ocd...................
#i seem to have a bit of a thing with checking things#and when i say a bit i mean it's getting very annoying#i don't actually even want to tell what i need to check the most bc it's fucking embarrassing#BC I KNOW I DON'T NEED TO CHECK IT I KNOW THAT I KNOW#AND YET.#I STILL HAVE TO FUCKING DO IT#HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#i hate it#and anyway doesn't skin picking go under ocd too#idk#i did actually once bring it up already with my psych but aaand she did agree with me but that was literally like at the end of the session#buuut i don't go there consistently yk so i just didn't have the chance to talk more abt it#but ii don't know sometimes i think that oh but what if others do the same and i'm just overthinking it#but . unfortunately the thing i need to check the most simply cannot be a normal thing lmao i am finding it very hard to believe that#that's something you guys do aswell#but then again#maybe#IDKK#weird it's weird#but it does bother me so fucking much#hhhhhhhhhhh#mayor of loserville
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Let's say chocolate is a metaphor for traditional relationships that happen to appear good but are too sickly sweet for Sanji to handle and after WCI he ends up not liking chocolate. At least for a while. He needs to move on from what happened first. But he wants to force himself to like it because he should like chocolate. It is one of the most basic ingredients when making sweets and it is also everywhere.
So what if it makes him want to throw up? What if his stomach betrays him when cooking? What if he needs to stop every two seconds to breathe because his lungs don't work properly when he smells chocolate? He will keep trying and trying to make it work. Everybody loves chocolate, after all, he should too.
But then, one day, Usopp sees everything he has around the kitchen. Like. That's an awful lot of sweets and a disgusting amount of chocolate and he doesn't seem like he has slept in a week. So of course he is concerned. "Why- What's all of this about, Sanji?" He tries to hide his nervousness with a laugh.
Sanji grips the counter tighter. So much his knuckles turn white. "I- I don't know. I guess I was just. In the mood for chocolate." But he doesn't sound sure at all. In fact, he looks like he's about to cry.
"Well." He looks around the room without wanting to touch anything but approaching Sanji a bit to check on him. "Luffy can have all of my portions because I kind of... Not like chocolate?"
"You don't- You don't like chocolate?"
"No? Too sweet. I actually pretty much hate it? The smell already makes me ill."
"Me too."
"You what?"
"I think I don't- I don't think I like chocolate anymore. Is that- I don't know if I ever did. Is that alright?"
"Why wouldn't it be alright, Sanji? It's just chocolate. Nobody can force you to eat it. Or cook it if you really don't want to."
And Sanji realizes that maybe... Maybe it is alright for him to not want chocolate, and a wave of relief takes over him for a solid second.
#sometimes i think about sanji and his internalized homophobia#he's a bit too much like me it's scary-- anyway#i don't like chocolate that much either like. talking literally here#so maybe sanji looks a little gayer and less bi in this post but have you considered that i needed to make it like this bc i'm projecting#i have no idea where i wanted to go with this. chocolate in theory are like. just the concept of traditional m/f relationships#but it ended up looking more like girls in general and look. look. maybe. maybe it's okay for sanji to be a little gay in this one#usopp has absolutely no idea what's going on but he just knows sanji is very very fucked up and needs help rn#also something something usopp doesn't like chocolate and sanji forces himself to like it until he realizes he doesn't have to#idk i don't think he hates chocolate in this one maybe he just needs a little more time to like. eat chocolate#what the fuck am i saying this doesn't make any sense i just woke up i am so sorry#black leg sanji#usopp#sanuso#one piece#whole cake island
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No one:
Me whenever I see yet another blog I respect and admire make/reblog a post on how the lesbian/comphet masterdoc is biphobic/inaccurate:
#lesbian#lesbophobia#comphet#lesbian masterdoc#comphet masterdoc#it's like aww c'mon not you too!#but it's like idk what is with people's obsession with trying to invalidate lesbians' experiences and saying that we are biphobic just for#our relation to the patriarchy#and saying that a tool that has helped many lesbians come to terms with our sexualities must secretly be some evil biphobic scheme#to force bisexual women back into the closet/eliminate and invalidate their attraction to men#i promise you that that is not what we're doing#it feels like they're just trying to say that the comphet masterdoc is wrong and that any lesbian who relates to it is really just bi and i#the closet#and as a lesbian who already suffers from comphet/intrusive thoughts about being sexually involved with men posts like these just make my#comphet go through the roof#they make me wonder even more if maybe my intrusive thoughts are my real feelings and i'm just repressing my attraction to men because the#lesbian masterdoc made me realize i was a lesbian and not attracted to men like i previously thought#and in addition they love to say that the creator of the doc came out as bi when it was only one of the editors of the doc#but ofc people just focus on that because they want so badly to prove that the comphet masterdoc doesn't exist and that it's simply#forcing bi girls to have denial#and then they love to say 'it was written by a bunch of teenagers' as if that invalidates it#or as if teenagers' experiences with comphet aren't real or trustworthy or worth listening to as if we are all simply irrational or naive#like atp people should just say the quiet part out loud that they think every lesbian who struggles with comphet is faking it and that we#are secretly bi and just think we're lesbians because we're traumatized by men but that eventually we will realize that we need a man in#fr it's just saddening#it's especially treacherous when other lesbians make posts like these#like come on now are you for real#i thought we were in this together#anyway that's all i'm done ranting lol
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Maaaaaaaaaaaan, come on.
(the post has ended up in the tags btw. I am not changing this and I need you to understand that it is just me talking to myself semi-publicly)
#Nevi Writes#things said by a guy writing a thing he doesn't even intend to be writing and it's like 10k of words now. >:[#while that's true I do want to emphasize that nobody should get excited about it right now tho okay#because like it's just. idk. I feel very much like it could end up not worth pursuing anyway. it's just a little baby wip.#(when the fuck did my little baby wips get to be 1/4-1/2 the length of my previous 'finished' stories!! what the hell)#it just feels nice to make words tho. and it does have that kind of 'ah good to catch up with these guys again' vibe which is nice.#even if the break has once again been like. on the order of days to a week maybe. I'm so bad at this taking a break business suddenly. lel.#but I don't have anything much to say about it at this point#other than I'm debating inventing a reason that presidential elections would have been moved by a couple of years between now and 2212#what is it with me and having to be so damn precise with dates in this whole narrative. am I just mad that Capcom never tries?#(yes) (so mad)#(and 2212 would actually be an election year is the problem. I want time to have passed but I also want there to be a pres. election.)#(it's fine don't worry about it)#(this is how I decided that Blucifer got bload up and then replaced also. weird reliance on mashing up IRL things and fictional explosions)#(but it's fun isn't it? got that veneer of verisimilitude. I'm good at long words)#idk this is inevitable isn't it. but I'm going to keep playing like it's not. I think I need a little more space for this one mentally.#the first one just sort of fell out of my head fully assembled and the second one did that also but with different vibes#though it did actually take some cutting things and adjusting things to make it work which Failure to Compile did not#Failure to Compile was bizarrely effortless until the mad editing dash. Outcome Unpredictable was WORK#fun work at least! but in hindsight it was definitely more work to make it flow properly.#the real job for the 3th if it happens is gonna be wrapping up threads without dropping new ones in bc that's such a habit of mine now
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i will genuinely never understand my dad!!! and i feel guilty for being confused and angered by him!!!! i don't know what he wants and i doubt i ever will
i guess he's known that he's had cancer for over a month now but never told me. and i dont know if it's because he wanted me to reach out/pay attention to him, as he's done in the past or if he just didn't think to, or if it's some other third mysterious reason that i can't think up
we aren't close since he was rarely in my life but i feel like that's something you tell your kid.
and the only reason i found out is because i went to go check and see why he hadn't replied to my message about asking if he wanted to hang out for the thousandth time without getting a response
#[static]#he tells me 'kid im gonna change i miss you i love you we need to hang out more im sorry that i wasnt around'#and then when we try and make plans it's like pulling teeth to get him to follow through#and sure there's been a couple of times in my life where ive had to back out of plans with him but like .....#we're talking less times than i have fingers on one hand in 30 years lol meanwhile he disappears for years without a word regularly#i thought we got somewhere last year when i decided to reach out after i stopped talking to him#we're both adults and we're busy but i somehow manage to have regular scheduled dnd games with 4 other adults twice a month#and i cant get my biological father who claims to want to know me reply to a message#and i know i know i know he's got his own demons and battles but i s2g it's just Frustrating because i dont know what he wants from me#i dont fuck with indecision and i dont like not knowing where i stand with someone#i know that he wont reach out to people in hopes they 'care enough' about him to do it#but like dude .......... SHOW THAT YOU CARE ABOUT ME TOO WTF#i want to be unendingly compassionate to him since he's gotta figure out what he's gonna do regarding his throat cancer#but like ..... what am i supposed to do with this lmao he saw my message and didn't reply and maybe he's busy#but he also didnt reply to any of my other messages asking to make time to see each other#but then he called me this summer to see if i was in town when he was there (and i wasn't and it was out of the blue)#he also posted a lowkey transphobic comedy sketch on his page which is weird because that's not really his politics but also he's old#and i can just hear exactly what he'd say about it if i tried to even bring it up to him ever#idk what he wants from me but i sometimes think even he doesn't know#i think we missed our time to mend things into something that makes sense#anyways sorry for the vent into the void i just got new information and dealing with stuff about my dad is always difficult#i have rarely felt wanted by him and have never felt seen for who i am either
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concept art for my AU where the church lets House Gautier hold on to the dragon sign in case they didn't have a kid with a Crest and so Miklan doesn't get kicked out and he loves his little brother and everything is Fine Actually
#fire emblem#fire emblem three houses#fire emblem 3 houses#fe3h#miklan anschutz gautier#miklan#miklan gautier#my art#pencil sketch#he doesn't use the dragon sign usually because it gives him headaches and nightmares#(nabatean stuff is Weird and not really compatible with humans!!)#but if he needs to pick it up for like a border skirmish/invasion or a formal event where they want to show off‚ it's safe for him to use#when sylvain is home miklan hands the lance off to him asap bc it's less weird if you have the actual crest rather than just the dragon sign#he prefers to use an axe (i'm thinking fortress knight for his class given that he has pretty heavy armor in game + bulky physique)#also he doesn't have the scar here bc i figured that happened either when he got kicked out or in a bad fight while he was a bandit#though i might put it back and say he got it while defending the border#not sure yet. the au is still in the early stages of development lol#anyway he and sylvain are SIGNIFICANTLY less fucked up and traumatized here bc their parents didn't treat miklan like trash#so he had no reason to get jealous of sylvain so he didn't abuse him and try to kill him multiple times when they were kids 😅#sylvain still has some crest baby issues but not nearly as much bc less crest-related trauma + emotional support from miklan#their parents still suck ass but having an older sibling who's on your side is way different from one who abuses you and then disappears#i also think miklan and glenn were friends in this au#... i wonder if ingrid's parents would have betrothed her to miklan instead after glenn died#haha ingrid. you are engaged to my brother#though idk if they would want to introduce a different crest to the family given that the lance is specifically for the crest of gautier#maybe they'd figure that having one parent with crest blood increases the chance of a different crest kid#because we know crests can skip generations so maybe miklan has latent crest blood that could manifest in his children#that would be an au to think about... if miklan found a wife and had a kid b4 conand tower and the baby had the crest of gautier?#and he came back like FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGE ME BITCHES UR GRANDSON HAS A FUCKING CREST!!#beep
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uuuug every so often i see writing tips passed around and i want to make a post but i can't find the right words to convey "aaaauuggh don't do what The r/se of sk/walk3r did"
(long tags warning bc i haven't learned how not to type like i'm not popping off yet)
#so basically after the movie was released worldwide to the public- official social media dropped a bunch of side facts about the story.#but not in the way that something like fromsoft games tend to do. u know how there's massive lore in some games?? but not overtly explained#but there's enough there (and the medium type might help) that fans pick up what the game already contains to connect lore.#anyway. the movie in op apparently had…a bunch of details that were relevant to the actual story in the movie but just. were not included#the knig/ts of ren?? their whole deal is Not Included In The Movie that they finally appear in#the planet that connects one of the major characters to the grandpa he has a whole complex revolved around? doesn't mention he visits#the inner thoughts of the protagonists' (supposedly). or the vital sidequest one main guy is on but is only vaguely mentioned?#not in the movie. these and most likely other tidbits important to the characters or narrative in some way were at most given a nod to#but otherwise nothing substantial to these themes and motivations or actual character backgrounds were properly executed/expanded on#so the official socials instead just like. idk shared a bunch of these deets online or in completely separate media of the franchise#but it should!!be in the movie!! it could have enriched the narrative and it could have been better executed!! do u get what i'm saying??#maybe i am like Burned from what that movie did in regards to this (and the franchise as a whole lol) but like. ig what im saying is#you can include the little side bits that might be important to your characters or narrative or themes in some way even in passing#and it doesn't need to be removed from the narrative entirely. if you like your audience to share something that fancies you then-#-you can make room! somewhere somehow. if u want! if it's balanced#so on so forth “kill your darlings” disclaimer but just Please not at the expense of throwing the baby out with the bathwater
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when your abusive ex decides to harass you and calls you a clown (🤡) so you go "okay, Grimaldi" and he says he doesn't even know what that means
get down with history clown style my dude 🙄
#don't have it in my to explain the details of this shitshow interaction but#let's just say#that when I am sad and lonely and desperate for familiar human interaction I will sometimes maybe#text an ex#but it's been YEARS since I have done so and I only did this time because something like... bad happened#has been happening#and man idk my brain wanted to convince me maybe the years had changed things#because my brain doesn't want to be alone and if everyone is going to abandon me anyway why not just like#accept that head on in the worst way#but I've changed#and I don't want to bend myself backwards for this fuckhead or anyone else#I'll be better off alone#that's what's been tried and true#I don't need anyone else so I just need to not WANT anyone else#i need to keep being alone#shouting at the void here#for the best
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Girl help I've acquired possibly yet another expensive hobby
#op#2 of them in fact#currently making a frame weaving loom (and by that i mean my dad idk enough about wood working and this wood is too expensive to fuck up)#and getting into mechanical keyboards#i already have a lotta yarn so the real costs rn are the keyboards#which are like at least 100usd a pop#what sucks is that they all seem to be 60% keyboards or tkl's and like. i need my fn and number pad keys pls and thx#debated sacrificing the num pad and getting a seperate one bc wowza these custom boards are absolutely gorgeous but#i am on such a budget and a cheap (cheap!!!) keyboard i found that i quite like is still gonna run me 200cad#if i got a pretty keeb and a seperate numpad i could easily be looking at $500+ like lordy#that's not even counting the switches i want to get (gateron baby kangs which are. $66. I'm assuming in usd bc it doesn't actually say)#anyway debating on whether or not i should order the keyboard now or wait till later cuz like is it even gonna be there later?#so much of this stuff is temporary and u never know#its a 96% keyboard and it has a calculator button!! only other board ive seen with that is my dads maybe 2005 wireless microsoft#so useful tbh#such a pretty board too all things considered#and finding a nice board like that with the numpad is not easy lemme tell ya like i was truly considering a ducky which.#i cant say im quite fond of their logo among other things#i think its more of a cream than white but u cant win em all#hmm to purchase now or to not purchase now‚ that is the question.... i could technically afford it but then#there's ComicCon + cost of supplies and whatnot for opening up my shop which is gonna be probably at least a hundred...#and then i would like to get some nice wool skirts for the winter/now bc pants are of the devil which is gonna be another 100/150 or so...#augh#i think the government should give me more money i think that would be very sexy of them to do#anyway can you believe i went on my phone to find a banana bread recipe then did all this instead? crazy#hashtag adhd life
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sometimes my bestfriend is like an angel in disguise istg
#i was justttttt thinking that aw it's so sad that navratri music is playling everywhere and i don't have friends to go with#like last year atleast i had tuition sorta friends but now ive isolated them too it sucks#but i was like well it's okay ill do it when i grow up celebrate every festival i didn't get to in my house because we just never do#and then she calls and she's like let's go this club jahan every year famous hota hai full celebration#and i was like ehh i don't want to i don't even know how to play and ill have to convince dad for raat can't we just#go to a cafe or something dopahar mein uske liye i don't even need permission#and she even agreed but she sounded sad and disappointed about it so i was like well fuck it you want to go club na#and she was like yeahhh so i was like aagh okay and i asked and we're going tomorrow!!!!!#and it's so ridiculous like i just say i don't want to go but it's actually so exciting to go someplace other than a cafe!!!!#and i was complaining to her ki okay ill go but i won't dress up and five mins later me and mumma are making full outfit with dupatta#style decided jewellery she has saved for years that are specifically navratri types and she's like we'll get my blouse altered it's fine#you know being sick has really given me perspective on my parents#im not going to hate my mom anymore i never used to growing up i always thought she was brave but helpless#but a stupid day in 12th i realised when we were talking that technically she COULF get divorced she just#doesn't want to because she'll be alone and she thinks we're growing up and leaving anyway so why should she let go of financial#stability for us. which is wild to me because girl you can't buy anything you want without his permission so i don't understand what's the#point if he's rich or poor but whatever whatever she's been raised this way etc etc#but anyway being sick really made me realise who the real monster is😭 all dad did was shout horribly at me all the time#and was like don't you dare take meds they're fake this is all just junk food stop eating it and you'll be fine. when i was literally#having 103 FEVER.#and mom was the one who was making me different drinks juices cutting up fruits staying with me as i get my blood drawn#checking my fever sote jaagte#like wow i literally wouldn't have gotten better if it wasn't for her and i couldn't believe how attentive and nice she was being#like yes i understand she just thinks this is her duty she's just playing her role a mother a housewife but still#idk i just realized that okay atleast she's good at being a mother dad isn't even that why am i feeling good about him when his love#not even love his politeness is so fucking conditional#and mom healed me even tho i told her about clubbing and drinking lots of alcohol she's kinda against it because she's seen#horrible things in life family yucky men but still she understands ans trusts my sister mostly and know we just do it for fun and she#wasn't even mad!!!!!!! like wow ooay#moms love is actually not conditional for the first time in my life i felt like if i fall maybe she could be there to catch me and dad wld
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