#idk man there's just too fucking much in my head these days and I'm tired

[vaguebloggingextreme]

Also, objectively knowing that i have trouble with communicating and maintaining boundaries that I need to emotionally be ok because growing up my boundaries (that I very clearly communicated) were constantly ignored because people thought it was funny and actually trying to figure out how to put those boundaries there now without feeling guilty or like it's a waste of time is a fucking struggle too.

[dilf-docs]

Saturday But in Your Sunday Best

bfd!joel miller x younger fem!reader

summary: joel has a co-worker's wedding in las vegas. everything that can go wrong, does.

warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap, smut, p. in v., creampie, oral (f. and m. receiving), breast play, fingering, dacryphilia, degradation kink, ANGST (as in i've suffered so will my characters. this wasn't at all what i had envisioned at first for this part), hurt/comfort, a bit of fluff (that's new), pls be nice this writer's block shot me in the foot

word count: 11,121 words

side note: sorry this took so long. between movie watching for the oscars, my other works, midterms, pedro pascal horny hours, my wattpad fic, the max fic you citizens let flop (ĉüřşę ÿoụ āĺļ), the brat taming fic that made numbers among my oomfs on twitter, a very shitty date (the situational irony of letting a man ruin my women's day) a ptwt fic gc in twitter (love u frens), and uni again, i let the ttdik series collect dust, my bad. as compensation, take this girthy chapter altho it makes me kinda insecure IDK. this is why i don't do series okay!! i'm my worst enemy and i fear procrastination is a chronical disease of mine atp

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What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas

His foot taps anxiously against the marble floor, sound drowned by the bustling crowd.

People come and go. Some hug, others cry. And Joel? Well, he's just waiting for you to come.

He checks his watch, the one Sarah gifted him, and sighs. Should've known better.

It's been two months since the pregnancy scare, and ever since then, you have put a bit of a distance between yourselves.

It was slow, gradual: first the excuses then nights were you wouldn't stay or ask him to. And, even if your affair was that, just an affair, he missed sleeping in the warmth of your embrace. He also missed the way your nose would crinkle when you laughed. You didn't laugh that often anymore, and if you did, it sounded like you were holding in: as if you were afraid to let loose and let him see through you. And to be honest, it was killing him.

So when he reached out to you for this, he should've expected for you to say no. That you wouldn't show up after that I'll see if I'm free text: no, Joel Miller simply shouldn't have harbored that much hope for his daughter's bestfriend he happened to be banging.

If he hadn't confirmed his invitation, he'd probably gone home and layed down. Watch some garbage TV with Sarah and some beer in hand, but here he was, like a lonely loser, luggage in hand.

(Sarah helped him pack. He didn't even know what to wear to a wedding, and then she showed up with his old suit-- that still fit, somehow, albeit a bit more tight, from the dry cleaning. Joel would be lost without her)

The speaker announces his flight is about to leave. Joel gets up, trying not to be dissappointed about the whole thing. He's got no right to, after all.

"Joel?"

He'd end up breaking his neck by how fast he turned.

There you are, and it's like the weight he wasn't aware of, settling on his chest, had been removed.

"You made it" is the first thing that makes it out of his lips.

You softly laugh, "Hello, Joel"

He gets closer to you, slowly, like if he where to do it faster, he'd scare you off. Or you'd be gone, as if a dream.

(It'd be a nightmare, though, because you wouldn't be here)

"Sorry. I-" he cuts off, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. There's some tension lingering in the air, the same when you left his house a week ago. Joel had been too much of a coward to invite you then, rather hiding behind a screen.

But now you were here.

"I didn't think you'd come" he says after a beat of silence.

You tilt your head to the side, eyebrow up as if you hadn't been acting weird at all.

"Why wouldn't I?"

(Because it seems like being in the same room as me tires you. That your eyes don't shine anymore, and the starry sky looks like a storm when you dare search my gaze as we fuck. Every time you breath, its like breathing the same air as me burns)

He rather not press, so instead, he says:

"I'm jus' glad ya' came. 'S all"

You nod, not adding anything at all. Then, both you walk to your gate, side by side in silence, the same that had seemed to seep inside your romance for the past weeks.

Well, romance was definitely a stretch. An affair seemed more like it.

Of course, you're aware the change it's on you. It would've been dumb of you to think Joel wouldn't notice your withdrawal, or how more often than not you'd be stuck in your head. But still, he didn't comment on it, and like you, danced around the subject, afraid for different reasons as yours. Or the same. Yet, you'll never know. No, you're aware you both are too stubborn, and that whatever it started on that day, had settled in between like a burning flame.

(Had you been engulfed by the fire yet?)

You try not to think about it. After all, you had the option not to come. But a weekend away in Las Vegas after midterms? Too tempting to let go.

(And it's not like images of a stood up Joel in the airport, looking miserable, had made you restless the last couple of days after his text)

"Ya' can take the window" he says, even if it's his seat.

He knows you're nervous about flying, a little detail that came up during a post-sex small talk.

(What're you're dreams? Joel asked. You had answered that you'd love to travel the world after graduating, but that you had a fear for flying, despite having only done it once. It may have been because the first time you did, it was to fly for your grandma's funeral. Perhaps it was by association then, that the bad feelings about boarding a plane could be related to that)

"Thanks" you mumble, sitting down. You're avoiding his gaze, but know he's looking at you.

"What?" a little harsher than intended.

He looks taken back, looking at his lap as he let's out a soft whisper, sheepishly:

"Nothin'. Jus' thinkin' you look pretty today"

A light blush creeps up your cheeks as you huff out a Whatever.

Joel let's a breath of relief out his tight chest and allows himself to smile.

(At least, he's still got an effect on you)

The wedding Joel was supposed to attend is in the Ángel De La Guarda cathedral. You'd be staying nearby, at a hotel room Joel's coworker had paid for, the same where the reception would take place.

Being in the same room as Joel one night should be the least of your worries, but then the space is even smaller than it was supposed to (given by Joel's cursing as he paced around, anxiously), and the strain of your relationship settles in the air, physically so, tight around your throat.

Then, it's the bed issue: there's only one. It's not like you haven't slept in the same bed before, obviously, but there's a certain dread deep in your stomach about sharing the enclosed space when you're at your most vulnerable. He moves around a lot during night, and something tells you you'd wake up to his strong arms and hot breath fanning over your neck, hairs rising at the proximity, making it harded to calm your heart.

"You okay?" he's asking, dropping the bags in a corner.

"At what time is the wedding?" you ask.

He checks his watch. "In about seven hours"

The glass bounces a ray right into your face, and you have to close your eyes at yet nother reminder of why this is all so wrong.

Sarah.

"We should rest..." he says, plopping on the bed. His plaid t-shirt rises up at the same time the color of your cheeks does, when the glimpse of soft tanned skin reveals itself. He looks up to your stiff standing figure, bulk arms behind his neck as he rests his head on his biceps. "Don't 'cha think?"

Lay with me. Not outloud.

"No" you say, hastily so, not missing the way a flicker of dull akin to the pain of rejection finds its way to his brown eyes. "I..." your voice softens. "I'd rather take a tour of the place, you know? It's not like I'll come every weekend here"

He's about to raise up. I'm coming with you, again not out loud, in case you'd reject his offering again.

Which you do.

"I'm fine" you say, grabbing your purse. "Just... I need a moment"

Away from you.

"Suit yourself" but there's a sharp edge on his apparent kindness.

Closing the door behind you, it takes all of you to not turn around and see his face one last time.

You wander off through the bright lights and noisy hallways, walking until the sun of the outdoors filters a ray over the carpet through the glass doors. Strides take you to the pool area, kids giggling, parents sunbathing and youngsters chilling.

You sigh, dipping your feet in the pool, chlorine up your nose and water baterly grazing your sundress.

But you're drowning.

Drowning on his presence, every room he's in now smaller. Walls of the room collapsing, as the ones of your lungs, every breath tight if your nose catches a whiff of his scent lingering in the air. You'd wash the sheets almost immediately, crying when your head hit the pillow and it smelled like lavender and not Joel.

It was the only right choice: to erase him out of your life, because with every new kiss and thrust, he'd take another part of you with him, and you don't know how much more you can give of yourself without dying. A part of you dies every time he walks out the door, anxious heart pondering when will he walk out for good. When he'll realize the thrill is gone, that your escapades were all but a product of his crisis, and what started as a mutual use of bodies, ends in the waste of your heart.

Joel has become a drug for you: knowing it's destructive, but the high so addictive, you don't mind the crash. It's unevitable, and a small treacherous voice in the back of your head says you're just postponing a foretold death.

Yet Joel Miller makes you feel alive. Alive as a spring, grassbed full of blooming flowers. As sun carressing your skin: if you stay too long, the warm becoming burning.

A kid walks up to your sad lonely pensive corner, splashing water onto you.

"Hey!" but he's gone, and it's Vegas, so his parents are three mojitos down from the open bar, asleep under the sun. You curse, getting up and back to your room to change.

When you get to your room, is eerily quiet. And dark, the curtains closed.

You rumage through your suitcase, pulling out a change. The dress slips off, falling to the carpet with a pathetic drowned sound. You're about to change into the t-shirt when the lights flicker.

"You back?"

You scream, trying to cover yourself.

"Woah!" Joel covers his eyes, both your reactions ironically funny. Your cheeks burn as you finish dressing yourself up, and if he takes a small peak between his fingers, well, you'll never know. "Jesus, doll. If ya' wanted it so bad, could've asked"

Something akin to anger and deception morph into a burning flame in the pit of your stomach. Even after all this months, after this imminent fight, Joel can't bring himself to ask, dancing around the fragile line that barely holds on with the clap of skin against skin and sweat, as to replace the tears that will never see the light of the day.

"Right, because that's all I want"

He raises an eyebrow at your tone. "S' a joke"

"Jokes are supposed to make people laugh"

He shoots you a look, before standing from the bed.

"What's gotten into ya'?"

He walks closer, yet you give him your back, tossing the sundress with too much force in your bag.

"Don't know what you're talking about" as nonchalant as you can muster.

"Look at me" you keep the harsh packing going on. Joel grows impatient at your confusing demeanor, not just from today, but days ago. He's had enough. He spins you around, losing his cool as he shouts. "Damn it, y/n, stop actin' like a brat!"

"Don't touch me!" you yell back, pulling away.

"So that's how's it now?" Joel lets out a scoff. "Y' get on ma' bed but the moment I put a finger in ya', y'act all coy and angry?"

"Right, 'cause I'm a slut. That's what sluts do: we get on lonely men's bed and fuck them"

He grabs the bridge of his nose, breathing heavily. His voice is laced with frustration, and you know it's your fault.

"Never said that"

Why not talk it like adults? No. Too much of a coward to do that.

"Jus' tell me, doll. What's goin' on?"

I think I love you, and I'm fucking scared.

His voice is soft, pleading. In your lifetime, you never thought you'd see Joel Miller beg. You did once, but it wasn't like this. Please, he'd say. Now, here he is, standing before you like the smallest man who ever lived and not the unstoppable force you made him out to be.

It should be easy. But words never come easy. Not to you. Neither love, so foreign it makes you shiver with fear. So natural, one day you opened your eyes to him laying next to you, Sarah staying in another city for a soccer tournament, and decided that was what you wanted. All his mornings. His bed voice, thick from sleep. His droopy eyes and tired smile, facil hair tickling your face as he says Good mornin', Southern drawl never more prominent, kisses in between. Let's get sum coffee after, because he always had to drink the bitter liquid out of his owl mug or wouldn't be able to make it through the day.

You want him to be the first thing you see when you open your eyes.

You want Joel Miller. Want. Want. Want.

"I hate you"

You have ruined me.

He probably expected anything but that, given his crestfallen face. Joel wishes for time to go back, at the beach. He'd say no, push you away. Fought a little harder. Never gotten into your bed.

The worst part is, he's a fucking liar: he'd probably still choose the same, even if the end is near.

"You ain't mean that" not knowing if he's trying to convince you or himself. "Jus' wanna hurt me"

You don't humor him with an answer.

"I shouldn't have come" is what you say instead, the bitter taste of defeat and hurt etched in your voice.

Would've been easier to stop when we should've.

His words run through the tense air like a bullet.

"I agree"

Weddings had always made you cry.

You weren't even a romantic, but the whole thing-- the promise of forever, it seemed to move your heart a bit.

So, if your eyes shimmer when the bride makes her entrance and the groom, Joel's co-worker, tears up, you feel your chest tight and stomach drop. It clenches with something akin to dread and want, as if suddenly, all that mattered to you was love. A year ago, if you told yourself-- the one who got on her knees to suck Joel's dick at the beach that night, that you'd be here?

You would've laughed.

Falling for the grumpy old man who also happens to be your bestfriend's dad?

Right. Imagine that.

Except there is nothing to imagine. All of it is real.

From his quiet laughter, the sound foreign and not frequent by the way it rasps against his throat. But now the wrinkles around his eyes are more prominent, forbidden laughs marking his blushing face. as he looks away, embarrassed. You can laugh, you had said, I won't tell anyone, yet he made you swore like the sight of Joel Miller laughing was the worst thing in the world. So had become the grey strands on his hair, more sprouting each time, as his damp curls twisted in your fingers.

It is also in the way his sweat that drops over your body as he tries hard to last longer, to his grunts that fill the room as he fills you to the brim with his warm cum. How his rough seems to meet every inch of your soft skin, like pieces of a puzzle.

Something clicks when you're with Joel, and you can't help but feel it's your fault this rift has been created, aggressively peeling the white off your nails as some form of anxious torture. But, he too, aside from his initial Just glad you came, hadn't said a word about it again. Even if he had noticed it all, before Vegas too. Nothing. And then Joel told you it was best if you didn't come. Fucking great.

You feel him tense next to you, body stiff when your arm accidentally brushes his when you stand up from the bench, making you roll your eyes.

The fallout had been awkward. The elevator ride took forever, and then the space on the cab felt too small. He took you to the back, on the benches near the exit, like he didn't want to be seen with you. It got you fuming: why bother to invite you at all?

In all truth, you could've picked up your bags and left after the fight, yet you stayed. You wonder who's more of a coward. In this weird dancing around you've got going on, walking in circles over the words Stay and Leave, like both are too delicate to say out loud. Even as the couple speak their vows, amid the claps and tears, your mind keeps drifting back to one question: Which would hurt less?

It's not until it ricochets on your arm that you realize the tears are also your own. You brush it fast, but by the corner of your eye, you know Joel notices. Still, he doesn't say anything, which contributes to your spite.

The ceremony is over, and just as you can feel the anticipation of the reception's drinks to buzz your nerves down, someone blocks you the exit. A couple, more like it.

Before fully registering their faces, Joel's hand flies to your back, pressed in a firm manner that oozes protectiveness. It makes your heart flutter, no matter how much you try to suffocate the treacherous butterflies in your stomach. You try not to think too much about it as you take them in: a man, looking in his middle forties, probably around the same age as Joel, so as the woman next to him, who smiles warmly. Not like the man, who seems unwelcoming.

"Joel" he pronounces his name, manners coming out cold. "It's nice to see you made it"

His grip on your back becomes more firm.

"Mark" he uses the same tone. "Well, when ya' confirm, y'gotta come"

"And who may this be?" Mark's wife asks, not thinking there's harm in her words. You swear you can hear him snicker next to her.

"She's-"

Joel stops midtrack. How is he supposed to even call you?

"I'm his girlfriend"

You don't know why you did that but you did. You also don't know why it causes you such satisfaction to see their wide eyes and Mark's disdain.

"Oh, I didn't know you had a girlfriend. How lovely!"

His cheeks go pink. "Thanks, Laura"

"Yes, Joel. Didn't think you'd move on" but his tone isn't like his wife's. "I just assumed that being with someone wasn't on your list anymore, you know, at your age. Especially one so... young"

Laura shots him a look.

Maybe it wasn't your place to get angry, not after how you've subjected Joel to your silent treatment this past months. Not after the fight you've just had hours ago. But he is also the same man who held your hand after you thought you were pregnant. He was the one who stayed. It is too how his shoulders slump, like he believes it to be true. You can't bear to see him sad, as contradictory as that may sound.

"Mark, right?"

The man nods, still sickly smiling.

"To me it sounds like you're jealous. Which is awful, because you've got a lovely wife" she looks away embarrassed while Mark fumes. "Also, when I turn around, try not to stare at my ass. I saw you when we arrived"

There's nothing left to say, so you walk past them.

"I think that was funny. Don't you?"

He avoids looking at you.

"I called a cab. Should take us back to the hotel"

No thanks. Nothing.

"Alright" your tone is dry. "Do as you please"

He opens the door for you, but his movements seem stiff and unnatural. Like he's second guessing every breath and step.

The car begins to move. You lean against the window, seeing the hues of neon through the glass. Joel's eyes burn holes on your head, a glimpse of brown in the reflection.

"I liked the wedding"

Joel looks at you properly for the first time since the fight. Your hair falls gracefully in cascades, hinting at an effort that tries to pass as a nonexistent one. Your makeup is soft, but your lips are in a shade he can't quite name, yet manage to make them even more fuller than usual. God, he thinks of it smeared on his clothes and mouth, feeling dumb all of the sudden. Then there's the dress. He doesn't have a favorite color, but as of now, it may be red: specially if its the red that hugs your curves, pushes your tits up and gives a little peak of your leg with its open cut, dangerously close to the start of your inner thigh. Not appropriate to wear at a church, maybe not a wedding either, but fuck didn't he care. He'd even rip it off, if it was such a problem.

"It was beautiful" he agrees, softly. "Never been to one. Maybe's why I think so"

You remove yourself from the window, now holding his gaze.

"What?" your mouth drops in surprise. "What about yours? Weren't you married?"

He smiles, but it appears to be sad. "Never got time for a wedding thought"

Joel has told you things. Things he'd never say outloud to anyone else. So whenever he opens up, letting you in, you let him, feeling that familiar pleasing ache in your chest at the thought of being enough: enough to be trusted with a piece of him. Of Joel Miller's heart.

The rest of the ride is silent, your mind still on Joel's hand on your back, on his words, and how the sting never goes.

In every thought of yours, he is.

"What'appened to your nails?"

The question catches you off guard. You're surprised he even noticed at all. But your hand lays in the space between his and your dish, stiff, as if waiting for him to hold it.

"Oh" you remove it from the table, placing it in your lap. "I chipped the polish off"

"Why?"

You turn to look at him, brown eyes examining you curiously, as if he didn't know you. Like he hadn't almost whisper those three words you had been tettering around as well.

"Why what Joel?" tone brash.

He scoffs at the change again, shoulders slumping a bit. Probably in annoyance, perhaps in defeat.

"Dunno" he goes back to his dish, cutting the steak with a bit too much force. I thought we were okay again. "S'rry I asked"

Your chest tightens, as it had been doing lately.

Was this the only thing you knew how to do now? Hurting Joel?

"No, I'm sorry"

It's his turn to get back at you. "Sorry for what?"

You swallow the lump that's formed in your throat, avoiding his gaze.

"I-"

Your eyes nervously dart across the room, trying to ignore the churn of your stomach and knot on your throat. You then catch the perfect distraction.

"I think Mark is staring at us again"

"What?" Joel asks in disbelief at your change of topic.

"Mark is staring" you sigh, getting up and dusting your dress off. "Wanna put on a show?"

"I didn't come to a wedding and wore this dress to be seated all night" you extend your hand. A quiet truce settles in between. "Let's dance"

At some point he gets up and takes your hand. It feels good. For a moment, be it childish or foolish, your mind thinks this is how it is: with no one around to know you, you're his and he's yours. It's just the two of you, dancing and laughing under the lights. He'd know the song that's playing, and when you'd ask, unfamiliar, Joel would joke: how could ya' know it, if you ain't even born yet?

For just a moment, it feels like it could be.

The music is soft. It's some sort of rendition of Lady, Lady, Lady by the band Jim hired to play at his wedding.

Joel's clammy hands slip against your cold palms as you walk to the dance floor.

"Nervous?" you ask, biting back a smile.

He squints his eyes at you. "I'm just outta practice, 's all"

You laugh. "I would've never guessed"

He shakes his head, but the ghost of a smirk hides in his lips.

"Cheeky baby. Now you actin' funny?"

Joel's hand finds its place in your waist, holding firmly as the first verses go by.

Dancing behind masks, just sort of pantomime.

But images reveal whatever lonely hearts can hide.

"Maybe I'm just tired" you reply, placing your head against his chest. His heart starts drumming faster, and you hear him gulp.

"It ain't even midnight yet"

You close your eyes, feeling every breath of his chest against your cheek.

"You know that's not what I'm talking about"

Lady, lady, lady, lady

I know it's in your heart to stay

"Y/n-"

Lady, lady, lady, lady

"I'm sorry" this time clearer.

His body rocks yours slowly to the tempo of the music, and for a brief moment, amongst the sea of guests and the voice of the singer, time stops, and it's just him and you.

"Don't"

He can't bear it. Not tonight.

When will I ever hear you say

I love you

Not when your body feels so well against his, your head resting on his chest like all those nights ago, where Joel held you close, the silent promise of never letting you go on his warm strong embrace. Not when just the thought of losing you is too unbearable to even think of. Not when today, he can let his mind drift away and heart beat, dreaming of things that'll make him the butt of the joke. For a moment, you're not wearing this red dress that's making him insane. You're all in white and there's a ring in your hand, just as there's one in his. You'd dance and say I'm yours, forever. A giggle. You can't get rid of me. And he'd smile and reply a Good, wasn't plannin' to.

But now he feels like he's going to lose you forever.

"I missed you" it's your way of trying, again.

His head is a whirlwind of emotions.

"Yeah?"

You lean closer, until his cologne burns in your nostrils.

"Yeah"

Time like silent stares, with no apology

"Joel"

Move towards the stars, and be my only one

This time, he finds it impossible to shut you up. Not when you've raised your head until your eyes meet his, and the constellations he very much loves are ever present in your stare.

Reach into the light, and feel love's gravity

"Yeah?"

You pull in closer, and he can feel the whiff of champagne coming out of your mouth. Your lips are parted, and a shaky whisper is all it takes for his head to spin, drunk in love.

"Please"

That pulls you to my side, where you should always be

Your lips are so inviting. All he has to do is cut the centimeters separating your mouths.

But it's a wall. One filled with doubts, fear and the quiet rage of rejection.

His voice wavers when he starts speaking.

"I think-"

He hasn't even finished his sentence, but your heart is already broken.

No wonder why you've always treated it like a burden: nothing is worst than a heavy heart.

Maybe he'd come to realize just how absurd this all was. Him, much older than you and Sarah's dad. How could he let his daughter's bestfriend go this far. That he was a forty something guy, dancing with a twenty two year old girl. That love comes in all shapes and sizes, but there's no name for this you have going on since last summer. Perhaps, there'll never be.

"Please" you hear yourself repeat.

It started as a plea for a kiss. You don't know what you're begging for anymore.

"No, baby-"

And Joel is the first to step back.

Lady, lady, lady, lady, I know it's in your heart to stay

The cold water of rejection hits you in the face, far from his warm embrace, the contour of his face, centimeters away, now meters.

"We can't"

An ocean away.

"Joel-" your throat tightens, panic bubbling in your chest.

"I think we should stop"

The whole world around you does as soon as those words leave his mouth.

Sorrow is quick to turn into anger, and all those months of guilt, rush, thrill, labored breaths, broken rules and promises you held to your heart as an oath, sweet whispered cons in your pillow that smelled like him. It all comes crashing down with force.

A dry laugh escapes past your lips. Joel winces at the sound.

"A bit too late for that, isn't it?"

"Baby-"

"Don't call me baby" you hiss, feeling your vision blurry. "Don't call me like you meant it"

"I do" the music has reduced to a buzz in the back of your head. His firm voice borders between desperate and pathetic. "Which is why am making 'tis"

"Fucking coward" you spit, feeling your skin on fire.

Don't give up. Please.

Fight for me. Fight for this.

For us.

"Coward?" it's Joel's turn to laugh. His dark chuckle sends shivers through your skin. "Y' shouldn't be talkin' 'bout that"

"Don't put all of this on me" you raise your shaky finger, accusing. "Don't you fucking dare"

"Thought Mark was watchin'. Or 's that 'nother one of y'r lies?" Joel seethes. "Or maybe ya' don't give a shit 'bout it. Jus' like you ain't give a shit 'bout us!"

"You think this is easy?" your voice raises. "You think I wanted this?"

You think I don't care? That I'm doing well? That I wanted to pull away from you? That I knew things would got as bad as they are?

You think I wanted to fall for you?

His eyes darken. "You started this"

Your heart stops beating. People laugh, the band is still playing and chatter bubbles like the champagne flutes waiters carry by.

But all you can hear is the moment your palm meets his face.

"I wish I never met you, Joel Miller"

And then you rush out the door, your heels burning as much as your eyes and chest. Far from the party, far from the world.

Far from him.

"We ain't done yet!"

You hear him bark behind you, yet your legs don't stop, despite the buzz in your ears and the slight stumble in your walk.

Your voice sounds like it doesn't belong to you when you hear yourself speak, without turning around.

"I think we are"

But Joel doesn't give up, making you feel trapped between wanting to hit him again and let yourself be held.

"Y/n!" he calls out just like he used to when you were a kid. Like you knew no better. Reckless. Berating. But now the taste of bitter mingles with his punishing demeanor.

You spin your heel, walking menacingly towards him.

"Don't call me that" you seethe, jabbing a finger to his chest.

"That's your fucken name!" he shouts.

Tears spring in the corner of your eyes. "You know what I mean"

"Enlighten me, doll" the nickname feels like a slap to your face, and for a moment, you wish he called you by your name again, instead of tainting the always sweet calling with his vitriol, as if the four letters meant something sacred he had profaned. "S'a matter of fact, why don't y'enlight me 'bout everythin' that's goin' on. 'Cause guess what? I'ont know what the fuck is happenin'!"

And it terrifies me.

His shout probably ran across the empty hallway. The music coming from inside sounds like a muffled heartbeat, mirroring your own.

To lose you. I might as well have.

"I don't know why you seem'a hate me now" quiet this time, like every word coming from his mouth take his voice little by little. "Why ya' get all sweet on me after weeks of leavin' me, pushin' me to the side... I'm old, doll. I ain't capable of takin' this anymore"

I'm not capable of surviving a broken heart.

The possibility of losing Joel, foever, had never crossed your mind, not even as you closed off, ignoring the way his brown sad eyes would search yours to try and find answers, maybe scraps of the... whatever it was you shared.

Now, it was real, and it shook you to the bone.

"Was fun while it lasted" closing off, trying to shut the doors he let you in, clawing back to that Joel Miller who couldn't be bent. The one Sarah deemed unbreakable. But it's the same that didn't know when to back down, now praying the price of his foolishness.

I don't regret it, but Joel doesn't have it in him to give you more of his heart for you to take. If he cuts it now, from the root, he'll spare his brain from saving more seconds of the image of you he'd have to get rid off: you, taking your coffee with two bags of sugar because you hated uneven numbers, and three seemed too much for your latte. You, standing on his room like you belonged there. You, on his car, the leather having absorbed some of the floral scent you seemed to carry with you. In your clothes, your skin, your hair. He'd have to go to bed knowing he'd never get to feel your strands in his fingers, tickling the remmanents of desolation he'd been carrying like a second skin ever since Sarah's mother walked away.

Your blood runs cold.

"Fun?" the words spill in a bitter incredulous tone, all the while you're trying to hold to him without raising your hand for him to take it, like just the thought of it would be enough to choose you. Words seem to fail you, and grasping at him feels like holding sand: it keeps falling from your fingers, a cruel reminder of your borrowed time. "Joel"

"Fun" he repeats the word, feeling sick. "As in, you'd marry someone who's worth for ya'. Probably choose Texas, maybe you'll stay away. 'Cause you're smart, and know what's good. But if ya' came back, livin' at the same neighbour, in the house across mine, you'd glance up and see my porch, thinkin' 'bout us, and this will become a joke with y'r husband, 'bout your rebel days. To your kids, summ cautionary tale. To you? An'scape of summ sorts of y'r other wise boring life"

Your shaking at this point, not knowing if it's anger, humilliation or sorrow.

I'm sorry. Please, don't give up on me. Stay.

"I'd be an experience. But to me? Doll" Joel chuckles, humorlessly. "You were everythin'"

A choked up sob bubbles from your chest.

"So that's what you think of me?" you laugh, a sound so hollow it makes his skin shiver. "That this is for the thrill? For the fucking anecdote?!"

"Trust me. I've lived long 'nough, kid. You'll understand later"

It's like all those months next to him meant nothing. Like pulling away from your lips was the easiest thing to do.

"Don't you fucking dare call me a kid!" you push him. "I'm not a kid"

"I know you ain't!" he roars back. "But you don't know shit!"

"Neither do you!" your quick to counter. "You think you've got me all figured out, huh? Bet you think that I'm some helpless naive idiot who doesn't know what I want. I don't know what I'm doing, that you're right. But I do know what I signed up for, the price I would pay" losing you or Sarah. Both. "I wanted it, and newsflash: so did you" you breath, running your hands through your hair, trying to comb some sense of normalcy to ground yourself while you try to recover your composture. His arms lay weakly by his sides, restraining himself from running to you and craddle you on his arms. "You chose this. You chose me, Joel Miller" each word pronounced with contempt. "I'm not a victim. Neither are you"

A dry chuckle escapes past his chapped lips. "What are we, then?"

(Two lonely souls who seek warmth. People who fell into the same bed. Shared time they shouldn't have. Selfish. Living on borrowed time. Always tettering around the edge, so easy to fall. History repeating itself. The dancing around. Dirty, like the Texan roads: and they all lead back to his bed)

"So do it" you shove him again, as if by doing so, you could push him away forever. From your mind, from your heart. From your life. "Say it"

He shakes his head, as if you'd insulted him.

"Sweetheart-"

"Say. It" you bark, tasting the venom on your tongue. "Say it!"

"I can't" looking so small, your resolve almost crumbles. Almost.

"Coward" you spit, repeatedly punching him feebly on the chest as tears stream down your cheeks. He tries to grab your hands, to stop you. "Don't touch me! Let me go"

"I can't" this time louder.

Tears sprout with more intensity at the desperate weight on his tone.

A single drop runs down when you say, defeated: "Quit me"

"I can't!" he shouts in your face, voice breaking slightly.

"Why?!"

"'Cause I fucking can't!" Joel breaks. He crumbles in your arms, body shaking as he buries himself in your reluctant embrace. He speaks again, this time softer, "I can't lose 'cha, baby. If that makes me sum goddamn coward, then so be it"

Something in you stirs. Like a lost boat, finding a lighthouse during a storm. Arriving to shore with gentle waves. Home, where it belongs.

"Joel-"

"I'm sorry for bein' selfish" between agitated and terrified, afraid of the silence and what you may say. "For noticin' your quiet and still carryin' on"

"Joel"

"Believe me, doll. I tried to stop. To leave ya'" he swallows, "but then I got invited and my mind went to ya'. Fast. You were the first person in my mind. Always are. I think that's when I knew. S'okay if you don't-"

"Joel!" you shout this time.

He raises his view from his little spot on your chest.

"It isn't just you" in a whisper that could easily pass as the wind that sweeps inside from the main door. Voice so fragile it hurts like glass. "I feel this too"

Just like that, he's both gone and back. His heart beats on his throat, voice raw when he searches for your eyes and asks:

"You do?"

The big unbreakable Joel Miller, looking at you not like a force to be reckoned with, but as a man, worn down by years of solitude and the weight of a secret.

You smile through the tears. "I've been many things, but a liar never"

He chuckles, softly. "Always was a bad one"

"See?" softly teasing, "you can attest to that"

"Twenty one years seem 'nough"

"Soon to be twenty two" pause. "And I would love it if you were there to see it"

A breath hitches somewhere in the middle of the new aphonia that's settled.

"You don't mean all'at. Think 'bout it-"

"I do" you interrupt him, firmly. You hold his gaze while cupping his face, the fright on his face mirroring your own. "You asked before, remember? There's your answer"

Joel is at loss for words. Was never good with them, less when it came to you: like your presence unsettled him in the same way tornadoes made him quiver when he was a child, rattling him to the bone. But there was a morbid fascination to them, in their destructive nature. Like beauty could be horror too, and he had learnt it thanks to your unforgiving winds that had swept him away from his feet.

He was flying. Fucking flying. Never quite landing. Afraid of the fall.

"I'm scared"

Joel leans in, forehead touching yours. His skin is warm, something about it soothing your nerves down.

"Me too"

You bite back a smile. "Big broody Miller, scared?"

"Y' know how'da disarm a man. I'll give ya' that"

You laugh, eyes crinkling while you swat his chest playfully. It's the same sound he missed so dearly. Joel can feel himself breath with relief.

"Now that's the story I'll tell my kids" could be our own. "The one where I won over Joel Miller"

A deep, rich rumble erupts from his chest as he pulls you even closer, this time, your head the one on his chest.

"I'll do you one better" he slowly moves his leg closer to the inner part of your thighs. "Wanna hear how it ends?"

"Jesus, Joel" laugh tense. Your heart pulses like his cock. Hard. "You sure are a mood killer"

He presses further. "But ya' want it, don't 'cha?"

You whimper, weakly. Truth is, you've been wet since you saw him dress on his rather tight suit. Now, after what you just confessed, you're not sure you can hold back any longer.

"Use y'r words, baby"

"Our room" the possesive adjective making his stomach rumble with need. "Now"

Stumbling feet. Whispered breaths oozing with drunk desire. Giggles. Buttons of an elevator pressed forcefully. A crammed space that felt even smaller. More giggles in a hallway full of doors that looked the same. Some mumbling, trying to remember the room. Grabbing the card from his pocket. You somehow make it to your room. Fumbling fingers. One swipe. Two. Try slower, but his voice is as urgent as strained. The door gives in. Finally, couldn't wait any longer. And he's chastising you, for being so impatient. Yet his eyes are all dark and sweet when looking it at you.

"We're here" and then the door closes with a loud thud. And Joel is yours again, just like he was that night, and forever was since.

You wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him back fervently. You open your mouth and let his tongue get inside as you moan his name.

"Please" you whine.

"Please what?" Joel chuckles, enamoured at your hanging mouth and heaving chest. Fucking tease. "Use y'r words, doll"

"Please, Joel" and hearing your name fall out of your lips like it's the most sacred prayer brings him weak to his knees. "I need you"

(I need you, as in I need you here. With me. Now. To never let go and hold my hand, not only when we fuck, but also when we walk, side by side, hands brushing like a touch it's too much to bear. Because if we held hands, I'd never be able to pull back. I need you to look at me as you undress me, because I'm bearing all of me for you, scars, body and secrets, trembling like a scared child, because no one's ever had me. Not like you. Not like you)

"'S right, sweet thing" he drawls out in a husky whisper, like his slick tongue was coated in honey. He pulls your head back, nipping and sucking on your skin. "Say ma' name like 's the only thing you know"

And in a way, it is. Because you'd always call Joel, fingers itching at a number you've memorized until it's burned in your eyelids, like when you close your eyes, you can see him standing in front of you, Texan accent and heavy boots in your doorstep, later to be discarded and hidden beneath your bed.

He pulls back, making you involuntary whine at the loss of his lips and tongue on you.

"Tell me you want this" he's saying, and for a moment, past the fire and the need, you see Joel as not the man who can bring you to come two times in a row, but your bestfriend's dad, who's slept in a bed alone for the past two decades, who can't meet you in the eyes when he undresses himself, looking like the one who's got the more to lose when his lips press aginst yours in a soft manner, not out of tenderness but out of fear.

"I do" without hesitation, as if you would tattoo your promise and wear it like your heart on your sleeve. "I want you, Joel"

You want all of him: from his boring Sundays sprawled on the couch watching a rerun of some old sitcom to his greying hair, aching joints and creaking bones, that despite so, would still kneel and eat your pussy like a man starved, tongue sliding through your folds with a learned ache, pouring the same yearn, longing and hunger that he wears on his eyes when they land on you, no matter if his brown are miles away, because they'd always find your own, like a boat lost in translation and a sea of sorrow coming back home, as if you're the only important thing in the world. His anchor. The lighthouse of his vast ocean of forlorness.

"That's my girl" but no smirk adorns his face, rather a small smile that warms your chest, right as he pulls you back in. There's a shift in the aire as he kisses you know, as if not only his tongue is in your insides but his soul, without holding back this time, like all limits have blurred and melted into a pool of desire and affection.

Joel pushes you down onto the wide bed, climbing on top of you as he kisses your jawline, leaving wet kisses along your warm skin. You moan as every contact of his mouth sends shudders to your body, him taking his time as he works over your jaw, down to your chest.

"Such'a pretty doll. And's mine" his calloused fingers fiddle with your bra, unclasping the lingerie until it falls messily discarded next to the bed. "Got summ nice tits on you, baby" and Joel's eyes sparkle with excitement, lighting up like the neon lights of the Vegas sign, "don't 'cha think?"

Your back arches with his touches, mouth ghosting over your nipple, already pebbled at just Joel's breath.

"Fuck, Joel" you mewl his name, dragged with difficulty as he laps his tongue over your breasts greedily. You can feel Joel's cock pulse and throbb in your thigh as his body hovers over yours, lips still wrapped around your nipple as he suckles and nibbles at the tender flesh.

"'S sorry, doll" he's apologizing in a mocking manner as you whimper at the contact of him against you, suckling hard, tongue swirling and flicking over the sensitive bud as he drew it deeper into the wet heat of his mouth. "Ain't know you'd be so fucken responsive with just a lil' lick at y'r pretty tits"

As your body trembles and quakes, he speaks again.

"Open y'r mouth" you do so, because honestly, you'd never deny him a thing. "Want 'cha to suck on 'tis fingers, like the slut ya're. Get them wet so they feel good against 'tis greedy pussy"

You take the fingers as you'd take his cock, sucking on the skin that tastes like salt and gasoline, a slight bitter taste but you take them as deep as you can, until your lips brush his rough knuckles.

"Good greedy whore" he praises. "Now let me help ya' with that"

Joel gestures your damp panties, taking them off and putting them up his nose, inhaling like he did the first time you ever fucked, back at the beach house that summer that feels a life ago, seawaves crashing onto the shore as they drowned out your moans.

"Sweet" as if your arousal was his favorite dessert, gripping the sticky lingerine until his knuckles turn white. "Fucken wet and drippin', and s'all for me"

He feels your greedy hands fumble with his pants and belt, pulling him closer as the feeling of unfairness at his clothed figure dawns upon you.

"I like how you look in a suit, but right now-"

He laughs, a deep rich sound bubbling up from his chest.

"Ma' baby wants it that bad, huh?" you nod your head feverishly, a beg threatening past your lips.

"Please, Joel. I want to suck your cock" the dirty words come out as quick as a breath. "I missed it so so bad" not caring at all about how desperate you come across or the pitiful begging that's a plea away from drooling out of your mouth with an aching hunger.

"'S that what you want? Draggin' me out'a reception 'cause y'r greedy dirty mouth couldn't keep still? Bet you'd crawl on da' floor just to get a taste of this dick" every word makes you mewl. "Might have to see ya' beggin' for it"

"I'll do it" you beg, voice a wanton plea. "I'll do whatever, I just need to-"

"I see ya' really do"

He removes your hands from his body, chuckling as you pout and whine like a baby.

"Love hearin' ya' so eager fo'me" Joel says, tugging the pants finally down. Through the cloth of his underwear, it's impossible not to see the silhoutte of his hard throbbing dick.

The sight of him, hair disheveled, pupils blown wide, white button shirt now wrinkled and sticky with sweat, tie loose and that faint smell of champagne that clung to his mouth and scent like a second layer of his skin.

"Get on the floor. Now" he commands, and you're quick to obey. "Gonna fuck that dirty mouth of yours until my cum dribbles outta your cheek. S' now? Be obedient if ya' want a taste, slut"

You let out a small whimper as Joel frees his cock from his underwear.

"That's right, baby. Like what ya' see?" his cock is straddling your face in your current kneeling form. "Need that mouth to open wider"

You obey in an instant.

"Good girl"

Joel shoves his cock inside your mouth, giving you a few seconds to adjust before pushing a little further. You bob your head forward but the task proved to be hard when he was thrusting at the same time. His big hard dick hits the back of your throat, a gag dying past your busy lips. 

"'S it bad if I tell ya' I like watchin' you squirm and struggle with my cock? 'S fuckin' hot"

You narrow your eyes, struggling to keep your throat relaxed as he thrusts forward, fucking your mouth and throat. Your thighs clasp together, the slick pooling down your legs in the absence of underwear.

Joel's groans become raspier as his body begins to tense.

"'M gonna fuck y'r throat raw, doll. And then, I'm gonna cum. Down y'r greedy throat. 'S my girl okay with that" he can see the plea in your eyes as you choke on his cock once more. "S'alright then. Ya' know I love to spoil ma' girl"

As his body starts to edge closer, his tongue runs loose.

"Love watching you suck ma' dick" he looks down on you, eyes glossy, probably because he was drunk in alcohol and you. "Love how it feels. Love how you feel. Love- I love you"

(There's an involuntary gag somewhere)

Joel's body tenses and it doesn't take that much for you to feel the warmth of his cum go down your throat.

You choke again and he brings his dick out of your throat and let you swallow the rest. 

There's a beat of silence, as dense as his fluids down your throat. You avoid his gaze, heart drumming on your chest.

"Doll..." he whispers, the last bits of climax sweating off his skin; all that's left is shame. "C'mere"

(Say it back, he should plead. I know your eyes don't lie, but if I heard those three silly words out of your mouth, I could die happy tonight. A bigger man would beg, but he's never been good, even if he tried)

He helps you get up, wobbly legs not being of help when it comes to the shock of his confession.

I love you.

As much as a tender touch as a knife slitting your chest open in a clean cut.

(You're bleeding love)

Love.

Such a foreign word, one you've never felt before. Yet, what's scary is recognizing that latent warmth on every stolen glance; brush of a hand. The tingles provoked by getting the largest serving, even if his daughter sat at the same table. The flutter of your chest when he tried to be there for you when you thought you were pregnant, even if he was as scared as you. In every little thing he had done since you first started playing with fire, how you wore his heartbeat as an echo and his skin like a second layer to your own.

His lips are swollen when they take yours.

"'S fine" some kind of tiredness seeping through the cracks of his gruff exterior and composed rejected posture. "Ya' don't have to-"

"I love you" you croack out.

His voice comes out impossibly small as he whispers. "What...?"

A fireworks show explodes out somewhere in the background.

"I love you" you repeat, words dripping with an adoration only known to captain's going down with their sinking ships.

You're drowning, but the water doesn't burn your lungs anymore.

"Lemme help with that sore throat of yours" he's tugging down your bottom lip, fingers playing with your mouth to open it. He gazes at you with a look that tugs at your heartstrings. "Open, baby"

Your dry throat and warm mouth welcomes the spit he lands inside.

"There ya' go" and you swallow it, making him curse. "Fuck. 'S so hot seein' you do that, my lil' sweet slut"

"Joel" you whine, hands curled up in white fists as you grab him by the collar of his button shirt.

"Whoa, baby. What's goin' on?" he chuckles softly. "Use y'r words"

"Y-You made a mess-" you blabber, the wet slick between your thigh sticky. "I-It hurts, Joel"

"Hurt?" he cocks an eyebrow. "Care to show me where?"

You sit in the bed, parting your legs, finger pointing out the moist zone.

"Here"

His adam's apple bobs, and the gulp reverberates against the walls of the room.

"Fuck... I see" each word strained. "Don't worry, doll. I can help ya' with'at"

It's his turn to kneel, knees burying on the carpet.

He places one of his big hands on your knee, his calloused fingers tracing absent patterns over the skin. His other hand drums slighty against your trembling leg, so close yet so far. You're so impossibly eager, and a part of him, that fragile ego, is boosted to the roof at your (actual and very real) want for him.

All that glistening pussy was his work. Joel really disarmed you like that.

"If I do this, maybe it won't hurt anymore" his mustache and recently trimmed beard tickle against your sensitive folds as he presses a kiss to your core. You writhe, throwing your head back as your hands fly to his hair, gripping the greying loose curls tightly at the contact. "Will ya' let me eat out this pretty pussy, doll?"

"Please" you let out, breathlessly.

"Love hearin' ya' beg" and he dives in, strong hands holding your thighs on place as he sucks your clit lightly. Your hips buck, his face burying into your cunt to the point his nose touches the warm folds. You moan at the feeling, his tongue now circling against your center.

"J-Joel"

"Feels s'good, right? As good as I feel feastin' on this tight little cunt" and his deep voice sends jolts when it echoes against your walls. You squirm at the sensation, stomach tight with his sucking and licking, misntrations sending you to the edge.

"Joel?"

Barely above a whisper, voice tight.

He looks up to you, pupils blown wide. "Yes?"

"C-Can you finger me, please?"

"Fuck, baby" he whistles. "You really know how'da bring a man to his knees"

And you chuckle at his lame attempt of a joke, not laughing at him but with him.

Joel slides one of his thick, calloused fingers through your soaked folds, feeling the velvet softness of your inner walls clench down on the invading digit, a demonstration of how impatient they were to take his cock. He circles your clit with the pad of his thumb, rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves in tight, slow circles.

"Wanna hear you, y/n" just your name alone on his mouth makes you writhe, and Joel's encouragement as his finger dips lower to tease at your entrance. He slides a second finger into your cunt, pumping in and out of your tight walls in a steady, driving rhythm. You roll against his hand as he curls his fingers. "Fuck yourself on my fingers, baby. Wanna see you ride 'em 'til you come undone. Wanna taste your cum on my tongue as you scream ma' name"

He can feel your body start to tremble, pussy clenching down on his fingers as he fucks you with a relentless pace.

"Shit" he groans, tongue lapping firmly at your clit, "s' fucking tight"

"I-I can't help it" you feel the burning sensation in the corner of your eyes, "I-I feel every inch of you in me"

(Up to your body, head and heart)

"And you ain't even had my cock yet" he's quick to tease. "But I know you'll feel s'good, baby. Takin' my cock like da' good girl y'are"

Tears begin to stream down your face freely, the salty drops hot against your warm skin.

You sniffle, and Joel's movements stop for a bit.

"You cryin'?" but you know damn well he's aroused, by the way he licks his lips absentmindedly as his brown orbs stare back at you, dilatated. You still remember the last time you cried during sex, and how his reaction was practically the same, except this time, it's received with a grateful welcome home. "Fuck, baby- I love when you cry like a lil' cocksleeve over ma' dick"

Despite the lewd words, he's wiping your tears away with his thumb in a soft gentle touch.

"S'okay, baby" he coos, kissing up your throat and onto your chin. Then, you feel a wet sensation on your cheek: but it isn't the tears, yet his tongue, licking the hot stream. "I'll give ya' ma' cock if you want it so much. Now quit your cryin', yeah?"

But you keep sniffling, impossible to close the dam once it's broken.

"My sweet crybaby" Joel mumbles, "I love ya', doll"

"I love you too" each time you said it, a new flower blooming in your heart. It could be. "I do, Joel"

He smiles, the kind of smile that is painful to watch. The kind that says: Is this real? Do I deserve this?

"Y'know I'm bad with words, so lemme show you instead"

He's climbing on top of you as you push yourself into the middle of the bed, lips tangled into a demanding kiss, his tongue dominating your mouth like he wants to tame it. He drops his underwear again, but he's still wearing the goddamn shirt. You whine, and for a second, while over you, he stops.

"What is it, baby?" Joel pants.

"T-take it off" you huff, worked up. You let the tie loose first, starting to unbutton his shirt after. "I want to see you, Joel"

His hand is quick to fly and stop you from taking it off. Even in the dim lit room, you can see the faintest of a blush covering his cheeks.

"Sweetheart..." he mumbles, "I dunno-"

"Please" trying to remove his hand.

"You really wanna?" but behind his teasing smile there's both a hopeful and vulnerable glint to his voice.

You extend your hand, cupping his cheek. He leans into the touch, and for a moment, the world outside ceases to exist, and it's just you, your ragged breaths and the light tickle of his growing beard on your palm.

It could be.

"Because I love you" holding his gaze firmly. "All of you"

"Fuck, baby" Joel starts to get off the shirt, "ya' really made those fuckers downstairs drop their damn mouths when ya' walked in with me. Couldn't believe it, such'a pretty girl could be mine" he snarls, grabbing your face by the chin. "Hell, I'ont believe it either. That you could wanna be with me"

But then you're touching his now naked form before you, fingers slowly tracing through his face to his tense jawline. Then across his broad shoulders to his tummy, feeling the soft swell against your stomach as he leans over your eager form. It's the way you look at him, as if he's the most beautiful man in the world, that makes his breath catch on his throat, staggering.

Your sweet broken voice rings in his head.

It isn't just you. I feel this too.

(Scared. Confused. Happy. Grieving. Loving)

It should be his ego boosted and cock stroked, but when his eyes find yours, it's his heart that feels the fullest.

Fuck, he was too old for this shit.

"Look at 'cha, making lame ol' me a sappy motherfucker" he laughs, the same blush from earlier now more prominent. He leans down to kiss you, his moustache brushing your lips. "If ya' don't stop, I'll take ya' right now and we're gettin' married tonight by summ random Elvis guy"

"What If I wanted that?" you challenge as your mouth presses fluttering kisses to his caging arm, lips stopping on each spot and mole peppered through his thick bicep.

"Then get dressed" you feel him squirm under your insistent lips, "'cause I ain't gettin' married again while naked"

"Where you married, Joel?" you can feel the salt air up your nose of the first night again, asking the same questions. The fact that he's opening to you warms your chest in a pleasant way.

He looks at you absentmindedly, humming as to confirm.

"We were too damn young. Had to, for the baby on the way" he tells. You remember Sarah's aversion to the topic, and given his next words, it makes sense. "Then she left"

I would never leave.

"I'm sorry" you offer instead.

"Don't" the atmosphere is quick to change again as thise words leave his mouth. "Now, where were we?"

You're quick to spread your legs to him, gilstening cunt on full view.

"Good girl" he smirks, lining himself with your warm entrance. "If ya' keep behavin', I might give ya' my cum"

His tip against your clit for a few seconds before pushing down against your hole. Joel groans as his length sinks in your gummy walls, feeling the tightness from before.

"You feel s'good" grunting as he slowly pushes in, letting you adjust to his girth. "Always do" 

He presses a gentle kiss to your sweaty hairline. 

"Tell me how it feels"

"Good" you mewl. "Big"

"Ain't that right" he chuckles.

"Need it all. Please" and you grip his neck tightly, arms around it. His nose brushes against yours as he grunts out a You little minx. "Want it, Joel. I can take it"

He bottoms out. "Then do"

"Fuck" you curse, cunt stretched to adapt to his girth. You breath in painfully, and Joel's eyes lace with concern. "I-It's fine"

"Sure? I can wait"

"I’m okay" you assure him, moved by his care for you. You buck your hips. "You can move"

He starts by setting a slow pace, taking all the space insade your clutching heat. Joel groans at the sensation, your walls gripping him like a vice as he continues to move in a slow motion, pounding into you with deep, powerful strokes. Yet, as his arms cage you by your sides and you look at him with certainty, he picks up a brutal pace, just as you like it, slamming into you over and over again, the obscene sound of skin slapping against skin filling the small bathroom.

"K-keep going" you grip his left arm. Joel lets out a hiss as your nails dig on his skin. "Feels so good"

"Good'nough for you to cum on m'dick?" he groans huskily in your ear, breath ghosting on your skin like a hot kiss. "Gonna fill you up, doll. I'll mark you as mine, now and for da' rest of y'r life"

The way his voice drips with dominance as he commands you, filled with a rough rich baritone tinted with a possesive hunger, his hips moving faster as he drives into you with force, pistoning harder is enough to set you on edge.

He leans forward, capturing your lips in a kiss. 

"Cum f'me, baby. Let me hear ya' cryin' over my cock"

Tears. Stars. Grunts. Moans. Cum.

Your cry for his name against his lips is how you announce your orgasm, washing over you. Your walls flutter as Joel lets you ride slowly through your climax.

"There ya' go, baby. Go on, ride it" then, he pauses. His face strains. "Hold on tight. I'm gonna- I'm gonna cum. Right there, baby. Stay"

Somewhere along the moans and the writhes of your soft skin against his hard planes and soft belly, Joel asks where you want it. Inside, you hear yourself say, eager to feel all of him again, filling your insides, invading every inch of your body until a part of himself leaks into your heart. He's then blabbering as your walls and heart flutter, about kids and other things you both want but can't have. Tonight, though, as he Joel buries himself deep inside you, his cock throbbing and pulsing as he starts to come, grinding against you, making sure you feel every last spurt, every last bit of his release, you allow yourself to believe.

He pumps some shallows thrusts inside of your slick dripping cunt, emptying himself, before pulling out and looking down at you with a tired smile.

"I love you" he says again in fervent whisper, as if by repeating it, he could materialize it. "I love you so fucking much, y/n. And if ya' can't accept that, can't believe in that, then... then I'ont know what the fuck I'm gonna do. 'Cause I can't lose ya', baby. I can't"

"You won't" you don't know why it comes so easy, or why the promise slips as natural as a breath. "I'm here, Joel Miller. You won't lose me"

credits: divider @kodaswrld / gif @loregifs

[serxa]

ARGAHIEKS

I can't stop reading ur Telemachus fanfic 😭😭pls make more if you can because damn 💔aughhh 💔💔 I'm so in love with the way u write him 💔💔

Like maybe just write the story abt when Odyssseus and Penelope reunite and stuff like that and Telemachus was listening to his parents saying sweet things and then idk 💔💔

You can make it NSFW too tbh, I like how you write him (make him 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂... And make him top because he's so hot bro 😔😔 ts making me look like a 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 gooner)

Sorry if I'm asking too much 😔😔

Remember to have a good day and drink water and get some rest pooks, love ur fanfic masterpiece ❤

PAYBACK — FOURTEEN

Word count: 1.5k

Summary: After Y/n and Telemachus had an argument, Y/n decided to make Telemachus jealous by flirting with one of the suitors, and Telemachus did that same with one of the maids. Until Telemachus got fed up at the end of the day.

Pairing: Telemachus x Fem!Reader

Warnings: MDNI, Jealous sex, blowjob, controlled orgasms, choking, handcuffed(fabric), d!inp!, creampie

𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐒 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐀𝐍 𝐈𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐘, always whining about the suitors and taking out his anger on Y/n. Which is a stupid way, why on Y/n!?

As Y/n was walking around the palace after their fight, since she called him immature and he called her a whining bitch, they decided to go away for a bit to cool off a bit of steam. The only thing Telemachus was so worried about was what might happen to her when she's walking alone in the palace, afraid of what the suitors might do to her.

Unbeknownst to her, she will be the one approaching the suitors. As she waited for Telemachus to go out, she was fixing herself in a little compact mirror Telemachus got me. Y/n looked up and saw Telemachus exit his room, so she walked to one of the suitors and started to talk to them.

The suitors was shocked at first, before he got all cocky and arrogant. "Yeah, of course I'm strong and bulk!" He exclaimed and Y/n was trying her hardest NOT to laugh or grimace. It was so stupid to her, that she wanted to laugh. Giving these kind of men the smallest bit of attention, immediately gets them a huge boner.

Y/n saw in the corner of her eye that Telemachus was watching, his eyes dripping with anger and jealous.. But.. Something else too. As her conversation with the suitors went on, she quickly got tired of the man just talking all about himself. She sighed softly and straightened her back. "It's was really nice talking to you.. I'll go now, alright?" She murmured.

"Uh- already-?" But before he could even finish his sentence, Y/n was gone in a blink of a moment. Y/n quickly walked through the halls of Telemachus' palace as she went for a search of his boyfriend. She looked at one corner and saw him flirting with one of the maids that he knows likes him. No no, head over heels in love with him. Me and Telemachus locked eyes and I just rolled my eyes, turning away, gripping my chiton and walked away.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

As Y/n was about to go out the palace to go to town without Telemachus, She suddenly felt someone pull her back in and started leading her somewhere. It was Telemachus, his hair tousled as he gripped on her wrist, pulling her to what seemed to be, towards his room. "Tsk- Telemachus." Y/n grumbled, knowing that she explained to Telemachus every time, she doesn't like getting forced to talk to him after an argument.

"Just shut up and follow me. Or else you want me to pull you by your hair that you kept twirling while talking to that suitor Menetes." He grumbled. "You're saying that like you weren't wiping off that soft smirk while talking to the maid that you know is in love with you. Are you stupid?" Y/n stated. "You didn't it first." Telemachus stated as he pushed her in the room. He took a fabric and took her wrists.

"If we can't talk this out, I'll fuck the anger out of you." Telemachus hissed in Y/n's ear as he tied her arms behind her back. She suddenly felt her stomach churn in a good way, as she was slammed on the bed by Telemachus. She never really saw Telemachus this aggressive in bed, but hell, even she would purposefully do something bratty just so she can get man handled by her boyfriend. Who wouldn't?

Y/n looked up at Telemachus and gulped as he started to remove his tunic. That's when she realized that he was going to fuck her clothed like he promised to do when he's mad. This image of him fucking her in her clothes had always been just an image in her wet dreams, and she was thanking the gods that she can finally experience this.

He already had a huge boner and he pulled her down on her knees. "Suck." He instructed as he gripped the back of her head just for support and for him to control her mouth the way he wants to do it. Y/n quickly opened his mouth and Telemachus quickly shoved his wet cock in her mouth, making her gag and cough on his dick.

She couldn't do anything with her arms, so she couldn't have support on his hips. He started to make my head go faster and Y/n whined against his cock in every thrust as it hits the back of her throat and off. She looked up at him as she sucked and that image will be engraved in Telemachus' mind and used for later masterbation reasons.

He pulled our of her mouth and Y/n's chin was covered in saliva and a few tears ran down her cheeks. She coughed and took a long deep breath to catch her breath. Before Y/n had time to compose herself, Telemachus pulled her up onto the bed, her stomach on the bed as he pushed her head in the cushions.

"Still remember the rules? Or I don't fuck you enough for you to remember?" Telemachus said against her neck as he pulled her chiton skirt all the way up, and he spanked Y/n's ass. "I-I-! R-.. Remember.." She mumbled as Telemachus spanked her. Telemachus rubbed his tip on Y/n's slit, making her shiver from head to toe as he kept her face against the mattress.

"Recite the rules while I fuck you, clearly. Any mistake, I go faster." He started as he practically slammed on, making Y/n almost pass out at the aggressive push of his dick all the way in. "K-.. Keep.. Quiet.." She murmured as Telemachus moved at a steady pace. "Because?" Telemachus asked. "Because.. Of the suitors.. And I don't want them to-.. Hah.. Ah~!" Y/n moaned as Telemachus slammed aggressively to see if Y/n can still maintain composure. "Ah.. That's a mistake." Telemachus stated.

He started to go a bit faster from his previous pace. "Next rule." He muttered as he gripped Y/n's arms against her back as he purposefully made Y/n arch her back to her a certain angle and g-spot Y/n had. "N-.. No begging.. Because that's p.. Patheti-ic!" Whined Y/n. She gripped the sheets as she tried to keep her composure. "And?" Telemachus asked. Y/n's thinking was clouded for the other reason, making her silent.

Telemachus slammed in, in such an aggressive way, to the point Y/n had to moan loudly. Telemachus pushed her head against the pillow she had. "What was the first rule?" Telemachus asked, gripping y/n's hair and cocked her back, making her arch her back even more while Telemachus continued to fuck her alot more faster, making Y/n's legs start to shake, her ass red as how much Telemachus was drilling his cock in her.

"K-Keep quiet so the suitors won't hear!" I whined. "But you're being what?" He huffed. "I'm being loud-" I murmured as I looked down, watching my lower abdomen grow a small bump when Telemachus' tip hit my cervix in a certain angle. "Atleats you know. That's a mistake." He hissed and quickly went faster, making Y/n open her mouth and close her eyes, but nothing came out as Telemachus basically used her as a fuck toy.

He put her in a headlock as he drilled his dick inside her now red pussy, and the silken juices she was producing dripped on Telemachus' dick and on the floor or her skirt because of his long it was. Y/n was so close to letting go of her orgasm as it was around the corner. "Hold." Telemachus stated as he went even faster to follow her orgasm. Y/n gripped his arm as he went so fast, and he was basically trying to choke her as he still put her in a headlock.

Y/n didn't know how to control her orgasm any more, but she knew if she let go and came, Telemachus would push it until he came twice, and she knows she'll practically pass out on the next round. Y/n nodded and Telemachus tightened his headlock as he went faster, making me shocked, not knowing he could even go faster. "Telemachus-!" Y/n moaned, her face turning red because of the blush on her cheeks and got Telemachus choked her, before he spanked the side of my thigh as a way of telling her to let go.

And Y/n being a good girl quickly came, making Telemachus moan on her shoulder, kissing it three times as a way of saying I love you. He pulled out and came on her back. Telemachus released her from her headlock and she just crashed on the sheets as she catches her breath. "Come here baby.." He took the fabric off her wrists and turned her around to look at him. "Gosh, you're absolutely destroyed, love." He laughed and Y/n just went red. "Come on, let's get you cleaned my love.." He carried her bridal style and carried her to the bathroom in his room...

I FINALLY POSTED WOOOHOOOOOOOOOO

[blingblong55]

Choke-Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader x John Price NSFW

^Such a fucking good song

Based on a request:

OK, weird combo Price!jealous x Ghost!possessive x F!reader. Reader goes on a mission with Her mentor Ghost and her Captain. I just imagine them pulling reader one way to another to end up sandwiched between them for some angry dominant sex. Idk just a thought --- F!Reader, smut, MDNI, 18+, dub-con, angry!sex, dom!Ghost, dom!Price, sub!reader, P-in-V, unprotected!sex, degrading, threesome, anal!sex, jealous!Price, possessive!Ghost, spanking ---

A/N: in Badjhur we trust

It was supposed to be a short missions, simple and quick. No one knew it'd end up being running to the woods' safe house, having to stay longer than expected and make both of your commanding officers jealous or possessive of their little private. Tension grew when you asked Ghost to open a bottle, the lid too hard to twist and your tired state not being able to create much strength. Price wished you asked him instead, a real man, in his words. That whole day, you spent it between laps, getting taught how to clean your riffle properly, teaching you new techniques and then the occasional groping.

At some point, you went from occasional pulls towards one of their laps to having one man pull your waist to his side whilst the other pulled your arms towards him. "Fuckin' leave her to me Price," Ghost said through gritted teeth. "I'm not letting you have her sit on your lap, lieutenant." Price puffed out a cloud of smoke. You looked between them and as Price lifted your chin to look at him, Ghost cupped your face and made you turn to him. "My pretty girl," he lifted his balaclava and as he was about to kiss your forehead, Price pulled you to his side.

"Don't touch her," his arms wrapped around you. Ghost couldn't take it you were his and at base, he had made sure all soldiers knew that. Price kissed you, hands roaming on you and then you felt it, Ghost bitting onto your neck, marking you as his. "Whoever makes 'er come more, fucking wins 'er." Ghost took your jackey off, lifitng the shirt from your body and tossing it aside. "What a beauty," Ghost kisses your shoulders and neck. Price with one single move removes your bra and kisses the collar bone.

Clothes all off, your captain's head between your thighs, teasing your folds all while the lieutenant makes you open your mouth wide as you give him head. You let out a whimper when they abruptly stop and put you on all fours. "Let's see who gives her a better time," Price's hands caress your bare ass before he gives you a good slap. You mewl and he chuckles, "Oh, what a good girl," he continues to slap your ass and without warming, Ghost smacks his cock on your mouth. "Stick your tongue out for me, be a good slut," he commands. You do as told and he smirks. "Spit on it, baby," your spit covering his tip, tongue swirling around and giving him pleasure.

Your mouth slowly stretches thin as his fat cock gets inside it. His thrusts all in rage, wanting to win this bet, make you his slut by the end of it. Price needed you to be his, needed your pretty holes filled and leaking with his cum, leaving you to his mercy only. Thick fingers deep inside your cunt, pumping themselves into that tight pussy of yours. The sweet noises of you gagging and being choked by Ghost's fat cock, making you clench on Price's thick and veiny cock. You cry out. Your g spot getting pleased at every thrust. Ghost knew this, so he pulled out, "Let me take her first, to show you how good her face looks when I take her fully," he tried to reason but in truth he needs you to himself, to be the one fucking himself into you.

"Fine, but I'll be next," His heavy cock gets stroked by his calloused hands as he sits and watches from the chair near the sofa. Ghost rubs his tip rubbing your slit, you let out a soft whimper to which he grbas your chin and makes you look at him. "Good fucking sluts take what I give," he spits out. Your mouth spread open, his fungers fucking your throat, tears and gags all running free, he smirks, his dick hard and slowly being thrusted in you. Your tits bouncing at his hard thrusts, he slaps yopur face when you close your moth around his fingers, "fucking keep it open!" he commands.

Price couldn't take it, so he moves to your mouth, his cock taking the lieutenants fingers place. "We had a fucking deal, Price," Ghost growls, thrust become more rough. You try and plea but both men could not care for you at this time. Price chokes you with his hands, your neck would for sure get some bruising after this. His balls slapping against your face. Your eyes shut as the tears and war paint came offf your face. Ghost hoplding your hips in place, his cock abusing your tight cunt. Price holding your neck, enjoying how you choke and clench around his cock, Ghost encouraging this by groaning. "Fucking. Slut. Taking. It.All." He said with each thrust.

The bulge of Ghost's fat and lenghthy cock on your tummy, he presses it down, which makes you moan. The vibrations only feeding Price to win this contest. Your tits getting slapped, Ghost bends forward and nibbles on them. Price pulls out, lays down and forcefully makes Ghost pull out. Your juices leaking from the lieutenants cock. Price on his back and your back to his chest, legs spread apart as he aligns his cock to your ass. The tight walls stretching for his size, you cry out only to get your mouth filled by Price's fist. Ghost holding your legs up as his cock gets buried in your cunt.

Your body was beyond pleasure, beyond the ecstasy of it, it was like entering a realm of sex and pleasure. Both of your holes getting stuffed and as wanted, filled by their cum. You'd think they stopped there, but they didn't, especially not Ghost. His thick and rough fingers pinch and rub your clit, you squirm and before you could even close your legs, he slaps the sensitive tissue. "Oh...what a delight," he smiles and leans forward, kissing your neck only to get pushed away by Price who kept choking you.

"Mine," Ghost grunts and bites your shoulder, leaving his teeth marked on your skin. "My fucking slut," he bites your neck this time and as his cum leaks into your cunt, he bites harder. You cry out a moan and he aggressively slaps your face. "Take it, bitch!" He slaps you again.

Price pulls out, your ass filled and covered in his cum. Ghost lifts you up, your weak legs wrapped around his hips, his cock still buried deep in you. He pushes you onto him, guides your pussy to his cock with every thrust. His hands under your ass as he moans. Price lighting up a cigar, watches with a smirk. Your nails dig into Ghost's back, you leaned against him, cries of pleasure escape your precious lips. Once he pulls out, he feels your juices and his cum drip form hour abused hole.

His big arms wrap you in a tight embrace as he gives you a sweet and long kiss. Soon, as you sat on his lap, all cuddled and kissed, he turned to Price. "Look who she is with now," he smiles and looks down at you. Pouty, flustered mess in his arms, holding him like he was your source of life. "My cum still leaks from her," Price comments. "Not for long, I'll make sure to replace it with mine," he kisses you again.

--- A/N: Let's thank @gh0stsenpai007 for helping me write parts of this scene <3 ---

Tags: @amygaster004 @liyanahelena @archangel1206 @bubblegumbabycow @saoirse06 @montenegroisr @potatoknight @braindancecopy

[brights-place]

[Spiderman] Miles 42 x Reader

1K 5 Part Special: 1 (You are here) , 2 , 3 ,4,5 Warnings: Mafia AU, Cursing, fluff, blood

A/N: 5 POSTS OF FIVE DIFFERENT FANDOMS TO FEED I WILL NOT BE LIMITED BECAUSE IMMA MAKE YALL BE FED anyways thank you all so much for 1K im so happy !! TY SO MUCH

Summary: A mafia au ATSV type or idk something similar to mafia au but the reader being Miles' personal bodyguard after they took all their anger out on their parents for being abusive despite being young and later got found by someone Miles' family who took them in and trained them then as the reader spent more time with Miles 42 they fall in love and super possessive since they would give their life protecting Miles and get jealous very easily if someone flirts with their partner, that they would glare at the person threaten to kill them if they didn't back off sorry if it's short I've been having writers block more then usual

The sound of rough heaving echoed as a silhouette was gripping its side The small boy, with deep/light e/c eyes, tilts his head as he gazes over the old floors. Each slab of wood was old and beginning to rot, defunct seeds fostered by mold. That's why the gentleman in front of the small boy seemed far too out of place he was clean and tidy unlike the boys state.

Like water and oil, he simply did not fit in with his surroundings yet a hand was held out infront of him as the h/cnette looked up to see a guy staring down at him as your hand stared at the hand afraid as you looked back to the furrowed brows and eyes of a man who spoke harshly "You wanna be left here to die?" you stared shakily taking his hands as he spoke "so you are... (Full Name) right?" you looked down "(Nickname) sir..." he stared at you and spoke "Aaron... Morales" You stared at him. You had heard the about the awful rumors and secrets of this city. How drunk driving accidents are the norm, small businesses getting robbed at gunpoint was just a regular day especially the arson and deaths with the mafia around yet you wouldn't expect one of the biggest underground crime groups to be holding a hand out to you yet you couldn't help but take it ignoring the bleeding hand under the debris twitching and the famillar eyes through a gap in the crumbled areas that surrounded them the same e/c eyes that they had of their own that had always stared at you with hatred. You couldn't help but turn back to the man who started to guide you away with a blank face. A/N: HEADCANNON TIME BABY OML I'm so tired Im trying my best to upload more since holidays started so Im planning on writing books more on my wattpad, writing also on tumblr for ramble babbles and drawing more so uhh YEAH!

- You were trained by Aaron or known as 'Uncle aaron' by a boy that was around your agel. Aaron would have taught you things that you shouldn't know for someone your age, being tasked to help him with his dirty work before - You had devoted your life to Uncle Aaron after saving you and even if you were tasked to start protecting miles which was easy blending in with him at his highschool even though he'd tell you to fuck off - He claims he's babysitting you because now you're in his care more like He's in your care where he pretends to be all tough shit when your the one cutting someones tongue out for spouting lies and talking to the pigs - Miles always fights his own battles so you doing this pissed him off yet he slowly started to get used to it - You both would practice fighting together hell you cleaned up his prowler mask and costume for when he and uncle aaron went off on missions - The amount of blood that was already on his hands disgusted you but you couldn't talk when you'd come back after getting information out of a guy with bloodied knuckles or a small trash bag being dragged through the room dripping a crimson drop onto the floor - You both falling for each other was a weakness something that shouldn't have happened but it did

- You sometimes think it's foolish for someone like miles to love you but then you remember this man has murdered and stole for good reasons even if he's apart of the mafia. He doesn't take shit from anyone. People follow him like obedient dogs out of fear and admiration because they know he's the right hand to Uncle aaron. - Orders or Not people would take a bullet without a second of hesitation and you were one of them being well Miles is personal body guard protecting him and threatening lives of those who speak ill of him and aaron. - You have certain things that you enjoy outside of battle doing things to relax you as Miles would be in the same room as you doing his own thing as you both were filled with the familiar relaxation. - Everytime your sent out on a mission you'd stare down at your gun loading it just wanting to get back to miles since he needs his right hand - One moment though when on a mission hiding behind a crate when another underground group is leader was shooting with his man you were gripping onto your gun only having one thought before the slaughter this man would not make you lose your life to let miles suffer once more.

reblogs + comments are appreciated ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

©brights-place 2024 — do not repost on another platform, copy, translate or edit my works! if you fit my DNI list please don't interact

[jae-bummer]

A Little Air

Request: Hi! I just discovered your account and I wanted to tell you that I LOVE the way you write,I´m kinda embarrassed to ask for this tho- I wanted to ask you if you could do prompt 8 with Bangchan,like someone introduces him to YN and uses thoses lines and then she falls in love or something like that? idk if I explained well,but I would really appreciate if you did this! ♡

Prompt:

8) "He has tired dad energy." "He doesn't have kids." "Still a DILF."

Pairing: Stray Kids Bang Chan x Reader

Genre: Fluff

.

Parties weren't really your thing.

And that's okay! Parties didn't need to be your thing. You much preferred things that were your thing. Coffee dates, reading books, going out to check the mail to say you saw sunlight that day. All of these were excellent things, and they were yours.

Your best friend, Bee, on the other hand, had very different things, such as parties.

And that's why you had been dragged to this one.

She tried to frame it as an "intimate get together," but upon arriving, you hadn't realized that nearly 40-50 people sharing a space was considered "intimate."

Glaring up at her, you tried to imagine small daggers flying from your pupils and into the side of her cheek. You didn't want to actually harm her, as they were very tiny, inconsequential daggers, but you wanted to have them annoy her, just like you were annoyed.

"You okay?" she hummed, her eyes constantly scanning the room around her. "You look like you have something in your eye."

You did. It was called revenge. "Why am I heeeere?"

"Because you're my best friend and I enjoy your company," she nodded, finally deigning to look your way.

Your expression remained deadpan as she burst into laughter. "What?"

"This is cruel and unusual punishment," you pouted, attempting to cross your arms with your drink still in your hand.

"Oh, come oooon!" she gasped. "It's not so bad! We're in the corner of the room, away from everyone, people watching. You love people watching!"

The bitch had you there.

"Hey, you two!" a familiar voice tugged at your attention. Looking over, a mutual friend was shuffling over.

"Hey, Eunji," you and Bee responded, one of you obviously much more enthusiastic than the other.

"What are you guys doing tucked away over here?" she asked, settling in at your opposite side.

"Reading the room," Bee grinned. "You know a lot of these people better than we do, so I have to ask...who is that?"

"Wasting no time on pleasantries," Eunji laughed. "Getting right into the important stuff, I see."

Motioning with her eyes, you followed Bee's line of sight until you too were looking at her subject of interest. It was not surprising in the least that this guy had snagged her attention. He was occupying one end of a velvet couch, sleepily following the conversation of the two men standing in front of him. Man-spread in an oddly desirable way, he held a drink by the edge of the rim in between his knees, his pose completely relaxed. Dressed from head to toe in black, you were surprised to admit that he made eye bags work. You had never seen someone look so tired and simultaneously hot at the same time.

"His name is Bang Chan," Eunji continued.

"He has tired dad energy," you murmured to no one in particular.

"He doesn't have kids," Eunji snorted, joining you in your ogling.

"Don't care," Bee said, shaking her head. "Still a DILF."

"Oh god," you gasped, immediately turning your attention elsewhere. You had been spotted. He was now looking at the three of you looking at him.

Bee continued to stare, a small smile on her lips. "I think you should talk to him, Y/N."

"I'm sorry, I should what?" you gasped, turning sharply to face your friend.

"Why not?" she asked, tilting her head. "He is very much your type."

"He is very much everyone's type!" you snapped. "Have you seen him?"

"I'm about to see him even better," she grinned. "He's coming this way."

Fuck.

Sure as shit, as soon as you turned your head back in his direction, you saw that he had stood and said his goodbyes to the men he had previously been talking to.

It may have been your imagination, but time seemed to slow as he strolled toward you. The sound of birds chirping and a few "sha la la's" could be heard playing in the distance.

"Excuse me," he said, much more cheerfully than you had anticipated. "I thought I'd come over and introduce myself. My name is Chris."

"Hi, Chris," the three of you chimed, clearly all taken aback.

This caused him to breath in a laugh, exposing you to his devastating smile. A spark danced in his eyes as he looked to each of your friends before settling his attention on you.

"We were just going to grab another drink," Bee interrupted, grabbing hold of Eunji's wrist. "You two want anything?"

"You haven't finished your first drink," you said in an attempt to get your friends to stay. You knew what they were doing, and you didn't appreciate it one bit.

"I want something different," Bee snapped back before shooting an awkward smile at Chan.

Before you could even blink, your friends disappeared into the throng of partygoers. Slowly turning back toward your newest acquaintance, you tried to come up with something thoughtful to say.

"How'd you end up here?" you blurted out instead.

Chan smiled easily again, watching you as if you were entertaining him. "This is my friend's apartment. What about you?"

"I was dragged here by the one who suddenly felt parched," you grumbled.

"Dragged?" he asked, lifting his brows.

"I'm not great at parties," you admitted, looking away from him in embarrassment. "I'm not great at...conversing or the whole...people thing."

"I think you're doing just fine," he cooed, his tone somehow comforting AND seductive. "But I totally understand. It can get to be really overwhelming."

You'd been talking for about twelve seconds, and he got it. Why didn't your friends get it?

"Do you want to get some air?" he asked, seeming to notice how stiff you were. "I have special balcony privileges."

"I'm talking with a VIP then?" you smirked.

"The V-est of the IPs," he grinned. Remaining silent, you realized he was waiting for your answer, not just assuming you wanted to go with him.

Well, that was refreshing. "I wouldn't mind stepping outside for a bit."

"Great," he nodded. Turning away from you, he began walking toward the opposite side of the apartment, parting the sea of people effortlessly. Almost forgetting to follow behind, you were shocked back into reality when he looked over his shoulder and intertwined your fingers in his.

Trying to remind yourself to remain calm, your heart skipped a beat, nonetheless.

You wouldn't normally go anywhere with a strange man you had met at a party, but there was just something about Chan that put you at ease. It was hard to explain, but his whole vibe was soft and comfortable. Like a human version of a hug.

Plus, there were more than enough people here to act as witnesses if he happened to push you off of the balcony.

Guiding you down a hallway and through a bedroom, Chan opened up a set of clear glass doors before stepping outside. As soon as the cold night air hit your face, you felt your body begin to relax.

"It's so quiet out here," you murmured, dropping Chan's hand and moving to stand at his side. You instantly regretted breaking the contact but were much too awkward to act normally if you maintained it.

"It's nice, isn't it?" he hummed, resting his forearms against the railing. "Hyunjin has a lot of these parties. This balcony has become an excellent hide out for when things get to be too much."

"Sounds like you're quite the party animal," you joked, pushing playfully at his shoulder with yours.

"Hardly!" he grinned. "I have a lot of friends, so I know I have some social skills, but I prefer to not be in a party setting. Don't get me wrong, it's fine sometimes, but I'd much rather hang out with people I'm already close with than be forced to meet new people."

Ouch, so much for being a human hug.

Instantly realizing his mistake, Chan jerked his head up and spun toward you. "No, no, no, no," he repeated quickly. "I didn't mean it like that. I mean, you're lovely. I mean...I should probably just stop talking, shouldn't I?"

Letting out a huffed laugh, it was your turn to lean on the balcony and stare into the city below. "It wasn't personal."

"It really wasn't," he groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Man, really mucked up that one, didn't I?"

"It did not win you any gold stars."

Throwing himself beside you again, he tilted his face to gaze at you. "Forgive me?"

"Already forgiven," you hummed. Chancing a look his way, you offered a small smile. "It's easy when I hardly know you."

"Very valid point," he nodded. Letting the air settle into silence, it was a few minutes before he finally spoke again. "Would you let me know you?"

"Sorry?" you asked, not sure if you heard him clearly. "Weren't you just saying you didn't like meeting new people?"

"That may be a slight twist on what I said," he grumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. "But that was before."

"And now?"

"And now I'm on the balcony with someone who is clearly out of my league and I'm floundering for any type of brownie points," he smiled shyly.

"Out of," you stammered. "Out of your league?"

He started chuckling again. "You're doing a great job at repeating things I've said."

Shaking your head, you tried to work out his meaning. "Like you're doing charity work?"

"Whoa," he breathed, furrowing his brows. "No, like you're likely too good for me."

"I think..." you paused, the information slowly seeping into your understanding. Did he really think that? "Someone hit you on the head very hard and you aren't thinking straight."

This caused Chan to choke out a surprised laugh. "Come oooon. You know who is the attractive one on this balcony."

"Pfft," you snorted. "Sure, Chris."

A shiver rippled across your shoulders, causing you to wrap your arms around yourself. What had once been an energizing chill had turned much cooler as the night stretched on.

Noticing this, Chan cocked a brow before he began biting his lip. Your eyes immediately zeroed in on the motion, trying to remember to breathe through something so simply sexy.

"Do you mind if I-" he began, motioning with his arms.

You weren't exactly sure what he was getting at, but at this point, he could likely do whatever he wanted with you, and you'd still thank him for the opportunity. Giving a weak nod, you were surprised when he pivoted you to face the city again and wrapped his arms around you. Bracing his hands on the balcony railing, he sandwiched you in between the metal and the front of his torso.

Sure, you were immediately warmed by his close proximity, but you were also that much closer to passing out. Being in this range, he was even more intoxicating than he had been before.

"Better?" he cooed; his breath heavy in your ear.

"Much," you squeaked, trying to remain calm.

Resting his chin on your shoulder, he let out a light sigh. "You never answered me."

Suddenly every question he had asked tonight flew from your brain. "What did you ask?"

"Would you let me know you?"

You thought you were going to swallow your tongue. "I'd like you to."

"Good," he cooed. "I look forward to it then."

Man, you'd have to send Bee an edible arrangement after this. Who knew you'd like parties after all?

[marikosenwrites]

📓✧˖°.bungo stray dogs smut scenarios and hcs

sen: my first smut fic lmao idk what and how i do but i'm gonna TRY MY BEST feed back is VERY MUCH appreciated i originally planned to do purely fic no hcs but i decided against that ^v^ tell me if you want the word count because i'm unsure if i should put it or not

characters: ada!dazai osamu, edogawa ranpo, chuuya nakahara

warnings: smut, mdni, im still putting ooc here, binding, biting (i'm still thinking tell me if smth needs to be added), rough sex (?), oral sex, use of y/n

(starts under the cut!)

‧₊˚⋅📃✎ᝰ..𖥔 ݁ dazai osamu

୨୧ loves binding you with random things that are flexible near him, like a tie or his bandages and things like that

୨୧ dazai just tangles his hand in your hair and like weaves through the strands and he doesn't want to pull his hand out so just pulls your hair and stuff

୨୧ if you ask him to be gentle, he compiles immediately and starts slowing down his relentless thrusts

୨୧ likes preparing you first (using his skilled fingers)

୨୧ when you're all wet he just invites himself

୨୧ pm!dazai would have done gunplay occasionally

scenario:

"bella- shit, you feel so, so, good, baby, yeah- god," dazai moans, his pace not slowing down, but becoming faster, which was what you hadn't expected.

a few whimpers and moans escape your lips, turning the taller on more, "'s-'samu, s-shit, slow down," you whimper some more as dazai hoists a leg on to his shoulder, allowing him to reach deeper places into your hole.

you scream, only to be stopped by two fingers going into your mouth. "shush, bella, yosano-san will find out. you certainly don't want that, do you?"

you shook your head in response, tears rapidly flowing down and reaching the crumpled sheets. although you cried, it was because of both the pain and the pleasure that your boyfriend was giving you.

"osamu..." you mumble as he slowed down his pace to an actually bearable one. "you're too harsh on me."

"oh? is that so?" he grinned and started to fasten his pace once again. "hmm?"

"o-osamu-! fuck-" as your pretty mewing and moans reached his ears, he grabbed a string of bandage on the nightstand next to you and tied your hands with it. "-osamu?"

"mm, you look more delightful than ever like this, bella." the man smirked.

"shall the show officially begin, now?"

‧₊˚⋅📃✎ᝰ..𖥔 ݁ edogawa ranpo

୨୧ into foodplay is the first thing i'll say

୨୧ loves sucking on tits too (literally his favorite thing to do what am i on about)

୨୧ loves sex after a tired day at work (like MINOURA or new people insulting him and stuff) (by insulting i mean saying that he isn't a good enough detective)

୨୧ sex between the both of you always starts with a make out session and then (and then) BOOM you strip and the good part starts

୨୧ he is a lazy bottom for real but when he's mad/frustrated oh boy you bouta see some stars

୨୧ loves when you top him

scenario:

quite a while had passed since you were bouncing on his on his cock, your moans and his combining into a harmony that was unique on the world, and only happens once a week or so.

ranpo had come home from a bad day, a frustrating one. you had always tended to his needs when it came to to tired days. and the same applies for you.

"mm...you look so nice bouncing like that f'me, sugar," the raven-head grins as he aids you with his hand.

you moan prettily, as you say, "ranpo- ngh-"

his moans get louder as he goes closer to reaching his peak. a while more after, you come with him closely following you in the motion. "well, sugar," his chest heaves up and down. "did you enjoy it?"

"m-mhm," you nod, unable to speak too much.

"well," he flips you around, now him on top of you as he puts the lollipop he was sucking in your mouth.

"let's begin round two."

‧₊˚⋅📃✎ᝰ..𖥔 ݁ nakahara chuuya

୨୧ not into gunplay, just because he's in the mafia, doesn't mean he has to be into gunplay right?

୨୧ is really soft with you once you warm up and stuff

୨୧ doesn't really have kinks

୨୧ had this one time he used his ability to pin you down

୨୧ active bottom? maybe. likes being in control more, though

୨୧ loves giving oral

scenario:

"doll, y/n, you're taking me so good, fuck-" chuuya groans in pleasure as your throat contracts and takes his length fully.

"ngh-" you couldn't really speak, considering...his dick was down your whole throat.

the red-head threw his head back as his eyes shut close, all while waves of pleasure overwhelmed his whole body and took over him.

your gaze went up, and observed chuuya. it was as if he had no more self-restraint at all. his gloved hand was tangled in your h/c hair, as he subconsciously massaged your scalp.

your groans met chuuya's sensitive ears and the sounds only turn him on more.

"sweetheart- ngh, fuck, s'good-" he felt some weird feeling gather at the bottom at his spine. was it his orgasm coming? perhaps. but in that moment, nothing mattered. in this world, you are his only pillar. you are his life. you are his everything.

one last moan and he came in your mouth, and less than a few seconds later, you also came. he pulled out as he watched his cum drip from his tip, and you swallowing the bodily fluid your hot session had produced.

"you were so good, doll." chuuya tenderly wiped a few beads of sweat off your forehead.

"i-" you swallowed your saliva, "it felt...good. maybe we should try again some other time, chuu."

"'s that so?" he smiled.

"we should end the night here. we're tired, after all."

©all banners, dividers, and stories are made by marikosenwrites and the pictures in it are from pinterest. i own none of the bungo stray dogs/bungou stray dogs/文豪ストレイドッグス characters mentioned here. all rights reserved, please do not steal.

mdni banner taken from @cafekitsune! (their work is much appreciated)

[loanecore]

my tears ricochet - negan x reader

sorry for any mistakes english isn’t my first language<3

SUMMARY: one shot based on “my tears ricochet” because folklore is my fav album.

WARNING: angst and fluff?? (i’m so nervous i never read angst or only when it’s a happy ending, call me a pussy if you want idgaf, I'm already depressed, no need to make it worse.) flashbacks???? semi happy ending? IDK LEAVE ME ALONE. and this is bad🌚

masterlist🎀

“cause i loved you, i swear i loved you, ‘til my dying day.”

we left alexandria with maggie and gabriel, and of course they had the good idea of taking negan with us. I couldn't really blame them, they asked me if I agreed and I stupidly said yes, thinking it would be okay, that I'd forgotten everything, that I'd forgotten my feelings and him, but no...

we were in a house that wasn't very big but was big enough for the four of us, we had to explore outside to find food and secure the house but we couldn't trust negan alone... so someone had to play babysitter. while negan was in his cell in alexandria, gabriel was always visiting negan so i can tell you that gabi is traumatized and for maggie it’s impossible… so of course i decided to be his fucking babysitter.

negan and I sat in the living room in silence, the silence heavy and awkward, neither of us saying anything, afraid of saying too much or not enough, afraid of bringing back memories, feelings... The realization hit me when we were both sitting next to each other on the sofa, I could feel the warmth of his body, that lack of warmth I'd been feeling was even deeper now, the need to feel his touch on me, i was craving his touch... I'd needed him all my life but I'd just buried my feelings deep in my heart and didn't want the others to know…

i dont know how but we ended up arguing, I don't know how or why it started but it all went to hell. my heart was aching, so much, it was my only interaction with him after so long. i needed to be honest with myself, i missed him. i couldn't do anything about it and i decided that blaming him for everything was the solution.

it was his fault that everything had gone wrong, it was his fault for taking me to the sanctuary, it was his fault for treating me better than everyone else. it was his fault for making me fall in love so hard.

i hit his torso with all my strength as he held me firmly. i felt tired, weak and confused, i had no strength left to fight. i let him pull me slowly towards his muscular chest until all my weight was on him, the sensation was so familiar and the feeling of regret resurfaced. the way i betrayed him, he had given me everything, all his love and trust and i broke him into a million pieces thinking that i would feel less guilty for feeling everything i felt and feel for him after what he had done to glenn, abraham and all my family

but it was even worse, I felt even worse, because I'd betrayed him but I'd also betrayed myself.

“I'm sorry... so sorry...” I couldn't breathe, my cheeks were burning with tears that flowed freely, all my emotions were mixed, all my memories came back...

•••••••

“no! loki will always be better than thor”

“pardon??? you can’t be serious right now?” he sits up dramatically on the bed with a look of shock on his face, turning his head slightly to look at me as I grinned from ear to ear.

I smiled even wider, his reaction was so funny. “i’m 100% serious, it’s not my fault if you can’t understand that old man”

he smiles and runs his tongue over his lips before biting his lip lightly. “excuse me young lady? I don't think I heard you correctly” he lies down leaning on his arm to be on top of me

“are you deaf? i said old. man. i mean it’s a common sign in the elderly..” I smiled a little more at every word, I wanted to burst out laughing because of his face.

suddenly, he was on top of me, trapping me between his legs and tickling me. i couldn’t breathe anymore.

“s-s-stop!! omg! please negan…” I couldn't stop laughing, he knew I was extremely ticklish. “that’s illegal… please!!!” I knew he was proud of himself because of his smile.

“say you’re sorry and i’m the funniest, strongest, bravest and sexiest man in the world” his cocky smile plastered on his face, he knew very well that I would give in.

“okay okay! stop! wait.” he stopped for a second

“it’s not hard knowing that almost everyone is dead-” he looked at me with shock in his eyes and was about to tickle me again. “NO WAIT! ok ok… you won…” I took a deep breath. “negan?”

“yes sweetheart?”

“you are the funniest, strongest, bravest and sexiest man in the world?” he looked at me with that arrogant smile I loved more than I cared to admit. “thank you my beautiful girl” he leaned in lightly to place a gentle kiss on my lips, one of his hands remaining on my waist and the other resting on my cheek. my hand rested naturally on his neck to intensify the kiss, i smiled softly, the kiss was so soft and full of promise. we gently separated from each other to breathe and these 3 words came out of my mouth. “i love you” his eyes softened and he placed a kiss on my forehead “i love you too princess, more than anything.”

•••••••

I was lying on his chest as he was drawing shapes on my naked hip, it was about 3 a.m.. it was dark outside and the only source of light was the beautiful full moon in the sky that passed through the thin curtains of negan's room. I was worried about everything... Alexandria, my family and Negan, he's so important to me and I wanted to protect him...

“what’s on your mind sweetheart?” he read me like an open book, and I could hardly ever lie to him. he always felt it deep in his heart.

“i’m… i’m worried about the war, i don’t want you to get hurt and i don’t want my family to get hurt… negan why does it always need to be so hard” I whispered softly, worried and sad because I knew that nothing was going to happen as planned. “i just don’t want to lose you negan, i can’t lose you.”

“everything will be fine baby, i promise”

oh, if he had known that the woman who was lying on his chest expressing her fear of losing him was going to lead to his defeat against Alexandria and get him locked up in a cell for 6 years, if only he had known... she was his soulmate… but was he hers?

••••••••

“i’m so sorry negan…”

“i know sweetheart, i know…” he hugged her as tightly as he could, as if she were going to disappear at any moment... he knew that even if she had betrayed him, she didn't mean him any harm and after all, he would never stop loving her.

[bellysoupset]

Now I need a fic about the boxing class! I was thinking maybe Jonah ate either something bad, or he ate too much, or he was just feeling kinda weird before the class but didn’t think anything of it. And somebody in class either accidentally or on purpose punched him in the stomach(if that happens in boxing idk). I’d also like it if the whole fic was from Jon’s POV, but if you feel differently that’s fine to.

If for any reason you don’t feel like writing this no hard feelings.

"Faster," Bella panted, raising her arms as guards and glaring at Jonah. The man huffed, wiping the sweat from his forehead with his forearm.

"Bells-"

"Faster!" She scoffed and Jonah gritted his teeth, throwing a harder punch at her. Bella moved away quickly, bouncing on her feet and opening a smug smile, before kicking in his direction.

Jonah was too slow, too tired and new at this, to avoid the kick and he crumbled to his knees with a pained gasp, clutching his stomach, "fucking-" a burp snuck up and Jonah slammed a hand over his lips when it turned loud and wet. He gulped down, "fuck you, Bella."

"Sorry," Bella crouched down next to him, still shaking slightly with a chuckle, "I didn't think it was going to hit that high-" she removed one of her gloves in order to plant it in his naked back, "sorry."

"Uhm," Jonah panted through the nausea and finally straightened up, sitting on the mat, "I think I'm done."

"It's the end of the class," Bell pointed out, removing her other glove, "I didn't mean to be so rough, I'm really sorry."

"It's fine," Jonah removed his own gloves, getting up, "I'll see you outside?"

"Yep," Bella jumped up quickly and they walked out of the mat, to the different locker rooms.

Jonah's easy attitude slipped off the minute he was alone in the bathroom. He moved to one of the stalls and took slow, measured breaths. If he was honest, this had little to do with Bella's kick straight to his gut. He had overdone it at lunch - not his fault the cafeteria served salmon for the first time in the month! - and all the jumping around in the gym had already been making him nauseous, the kick had only taken it up a notch.

He leaned back against the thick plastic wall and forced up a couple burps, muffling them in his fist. His stomach churned uneasily and he could taste lunch all over again, causing him to shudder, but the small release of air helped a bit and Jonah gulped down the watery sensation in his mouth.

Feeling like it was more or less safe to leave, Jon headed to the shower area.

Bella was waiting for him just outside the gym, clad in tight jeans, combat boots and an oversized biker jacket, her long curly hair was out of the braids she sported during class and limp and wet. She had that familiar frown on her face, that Jonah knew by now was just her face and lit up as she saw him.

"Hey, took you forever," Bella teased him lightly, reaching without thinking to push a humid coil from his hair away from his eyes, "do you wanna get dinner?"

It was a court day, meaning Leo was going to get home super late, so Jonah shrugged, "yeah, sure," he looked around, "you're driving today?"

"No, Luke dropped me off, he said I should call," Bella moved so she was side by side with Jonah and they started walking down the street, "if you ask me, I think he's boycotting my car."

"As he should, that's a relic from the triassic period," Jonah laughed, causing her to pout.

"Don't say that, she's my baby," Bella groaned, "I drove her here all the way from New Mexico more times than I can count, she's a trooper."

"That means she's probably a safety hazard," Jon rolled his eyes, trying to ignore the fact the heavy feeling from before was returning, sitting in his stomach like a brick, "how's work coming along?"

Bella was incredibly easy to talk to, she never took any of Jon's curt answers to the heart and offered some of her own straight to the point, no nonsense jabs.

As they walked to the restaurant they chatted about her job — she had a big project happening and everyone was super stressed about it and taking on jobs that weren't theirs to try and speed the process along —, Jonah shared some of the stories from Europe and got chewed up for treating Angie like a little kid.

"She's turning eighteen in what, a couple of months?"

"October," Jonah grumbled, holding the restaurant door open for her and Bella walked in backwards so she could keep looking at him.

"Less than six months then," she grabbed his forearm to pull him to the table she had already decided on, "I get that you're still finding your footing, but she's a big girl."

"She doesn't act like a big girl," Jonah scoffed, sitting down in front of Bella and grabbing the menu so he could avoid her piercing gaze, "she's a baby."

"She's spoiled," Bell's voice was matter of fact and Jonah looked up to glare at her, only to realize this was not a discussion he was going to win. Bella was the only one who'd ever tell him something this and stand by her opinion, Leo and Vince were both too polite to say it and Luke had no ground to even recognize it, Wendy had brought it up only once and raised her hands in defeat when Jonah prickly about it. Bella didn't give a single fuck.

He sighed and looked back down.

None of the plates looked remotely appetizing. Jonah squirmed in his seat as he felt his pants digging in his stomach, flipping the page of his menu and avoiding looking at the pictures. His belly let out a loud whine, although the restaurant's noise covered it up and Jon felt his gut bloat up a bit more.

"You don't have to glare holes in the menu, Jon," Bella rolled her eyes and reached in to grab his wrist, until he looked at her, "she's spoiled, I can say because I married the male version of her."

"Don't say that," Jonah groaned and Bell smiled, pulling back her hand.

"I don't mean it like that, I mean I married someone who was spoiled as well. And trust me, you gotta let her mess up on her own and not try to Yoda her through life, otherwise she'll make her mistakes later, when the consequences are bigger and much less understandable. You're not making her a favor by doing that."

"When you put it like that," Jonah sighed, shutting the menu, "I'm not really hungry."

"I'm starving," Bella put hers aside as well, "I'll order a big one and we can share, how about? This way you're not ordering a full one just to eat half of it?"

Jon would rather not eat anything, but he knew saying that, especially after they had spent two hours exercising, was going to raise a red flag for her. He nodded, "yeah, alright. What are you ordering?"

"Ribs," Bells opened a smile, "you want a beer?"

Fuck no, Jon flinched at the thought and shook his head, "nope, I... Uh," he opened the menu again, "I'll have an orange juice."

A waiter approached their table and Bella told him the order, causing Jonah to frown as she asked for two juices, "you don't have to not drink as well, Bell-"

"No, it's fine," she shushed him with a handwave that caused the waiter to chuckle, "I think that's all, thank you."

Bella launched herself into telling him all the gossip from their gym and Jonah was enthralled enough he momentarily forgot about his upset stomach, only to be starkly reminded of it as the large plate of glazed ribs was put before them, as well as the two glasses.

The smell was overpowering and Jonah leaned as far back as his chair allowed, gulping down nervously, while Bella served herself.

His stomach churned at the sight of the ginger tearing into the meat and Jonah breathed slowly through his mouth, reaching for the juice, hoping he could push everything further down.

As he was too busy fighting the growing nausea, Jonah was barely paying any attention to whatever Bell was saying, until she quirked her head and waved in front of his eyes.

"Anyone home?" She raised her eyebrows, "you zoned out on me."

"Sorry," Jonah gulped down, moving once again and tugging on the waistband of his pants. He really wanted to undo them, they felt like they were cutting in his tummy, "you were saying?"

Bella squinted at him, picking up a rib and pushing the plate his way, "you're not eating."

"Not hungry," Jonah shrugged and she frowned.

"Well, I can't eat all of it, at least get a bite," Bella licked the sauce off her fingers, "you heard about Vince's new little friend?"

"Little-" Jon grimaced and muffled a burp against his had, "little friend? He got a cat or something?"

"No," Bella snorted, "it's a coworker that he's made his mission to adopt. Luke hates him, it's all he complains about now. That Max this, Max that, Max is short, Max is annoying, Max is taking up too much attention, Max is a jerk-" Bella's amusement was evident in her words, "he's like a little kid."

"Max annoying Luke already puts him in my good graces," Jonah forced a smile, which quickly turned sour when Bella chugged the rest of her juice and gestured to the half eaten plate.

"I can't eat anymore, all yours."

Jonah genuinely tried to eat, grabbing the secondary set of fork and knife and tearing a rib apart, but he couldn't even bring it up to his lips. The smell was too strong and his queasiness turned up a notch, causing him to gag and drop the fork back down, turning his head.

"Knew it," Bella sighed, rolling her eyes, "you're not half as good an actor as you think, Jon," her voice was sarcastic, but still kind and she got up with a sigh, circling the table to pat his arm, "c'mon, big guy, let's get you out of here before you cause a scene."

"If you knew I felt like shit why didn't you say something?" Jonah groaned, grabbing his ditched jacket and leaning into her arms, as Bella guided him towards the door.

"Why didn't you?" She scoffed, helping him out, "stay here, I'll get the bill."

Outside the air was much colder and there wasn't the overwhelming smell of food, but his stomach wasn't feeling even a little bit settled. Jon moved away from the entrance, to the other side of the street, and braced against his knees, taking deep breaths.

He could feel his lunch flipping inside of him and Jonah coughed weakly, blowing out a deep belch and staring at his shoes. It felt like just ten seconds passed, but he knew it was longer, when Bella wrapped an arm around his back and helped him straighten up.

"I'll drive you home, c'mon," she planted a hand on his chest, bracing him and Jonah let out a groan, feeling humiliated.

"Sorry..." His stomach let out another loud growl and he didn't bother muffling the belch, only turning his head. It was sickeningly wet and he groaned under his breath, "gross..."

"Don't be stupid, you're not gross," Bella reprimanded him sharply, rubbing his back. She was quiet for a second, before saying in a smaller voice, "were you sick already...? Is this because of the kick?"

"No," Jonah pressed a hand over his lips as they kept walking back to the gym, "lunch..." his mouth watered at the thought, "lunch just- just isn't- Sitting well..."

Bella moved her hand down, from his chest to his stomach and Jon felt his whole face burn. Not only a belly rub from her was mortifying enough, but it was even more so in public.

The street was deserted though, they had already left the area with the most commotion, and Bell's fingers against his bloated stomach managed to work up another thick belch. It burned his throat, bringing up a splash of sickness with it, that Jonah gulped convulsively.

"Fuck," he whined, feeling clammy and jittery, "I'm gonna be sick."

"Now or-"

She never finished her sentence, because Jonah's grabbed on her shoulder to push her out of the way and bent in half, just in time to redecorate the patch of sidewalk they were on.

He groaned loudly, wrapping an arm around his upset stomach and feeling the gurgling inside, struggling to spit the ropey saliva.

"Aw, darling," Bella's voice was incredibly gentle and she had jumped back, but the tip of her sneakers were covered in white specks of the chunky vomit. Yet, she was rubbing his back, unbothered, "it's alright, get it up, Jon..."

Jonah's stomach gave another growl and he nearly went down with a unproductive heave, his ears going totally deaf for a second as he struggled to breathe and coughed up another disgusting splash of sick. He moaned, burping softly and squeezing his eyes shuts, hearing his heart in his ears, drowning all noise out.

"Jon?" Bella's voice filtered through after a minute and he realized she was almost hugging him, to keep him standing, "Jonah, you're alive over there?"

He coughed, burping once more and nodding, finally opening his eyes. It was a gruesome sight and he let out a groan, immediately closing his eyes again, "Ew... I'm sorry..."

Bella's voice was lighthearted and amused as she patted his back, "please, in the Atwood scale this was barely a seven," her pats forced up another belch, "hold on me, let's move around..."

Slowly she maneuvered him away from the disgusting puddle and Jonah let out a yelp as he felt Bella's hand go in his front pocket, "that's sexual harassment, Bella."

"You must think my standards are incredibly low if you think I'm making a move on you given what I just watched," Bella snorted, then he heard his car key's clicking and his car beeping.

Jonah opened his eyes, wiping at his mouth and the clammy sensation, taking a deep breath, "well, yeah. You married Lucas."

Bella let out a cackle, shoving his arm, "get in the car, asshole. I'm gonna drive you home."

[cruyuu]

Hey have you seen that one managa panel in the latest leaks where its sukuna just gently graeping yuuji's head as he just beats the shit outta him?

Theres a post on tumblr where it has it and like a powerscaler from twitter basically saying "is sukuna really tryna fuck up yuuji bc i would have personally sunken my nails into his skull" and uh... yeah the person has a point. Sukuna really is just gently holding Yuuji's head.

Like his actions seem both brutal yet... protective? For a man who 'hates' Yuuji he sure as hell is giving mixed signals during his fight against him.

I did, anon! The "holding gently" and "beating the shit out of" being in a single sentence together tho lmfao.

I'm glad people are starting to notice that these two are not just fighting because that is true. If they were truly fighting, the fight would've ended a long time ago and would've been way, way more serious than whatever this is. Atp, I don't even know what the hell they are doing. They're groping each other more so than causing any real damage, like I'm genuinely tired of them lmfao.

Ever since the start of this arc, we've got Sukuna gripping his waist and holding him like they're dancing (?), Yuuji clinging onto his arm like a koala, Sukuna smiling as he hugs him closer to his face and Dismantles him, Yuuji wrapping his arms around his neck and his legs around his waist and now... add the gentle head cradling as they throw punches at each other. Truly the fight of all time, isn't it? Just a bit of jujutsu (ft. a Domain Expansion not for ripping away Sukuna's soul but... talking with him and spending a day with him?) a lot of unnecessary touching (and gentleness), and hatred which is showcased by... gentle head holding?

Sure, Megumi is still in there so that explains why Yuuji would be holding back from damaging Sukuna too much and not tearing him limb from limb but still, that notion didn't stop him from nearly tearing his heart out in Chapter 260 nor does it explain why he wrapped his arms around his neck (like what was the purpose) so... yeah.

As for Sukuna... yeah, there's absolutely no way to explain his behavior at all.

With that hulking form which towers over Yuuji, you would think, since he hates him and wishes to see him gone (and especially since he knows Yuuji's punches are dangerous and need to be avoided), he'd be trying to put some distance between them. Like idk grab him by the leg and throw him away or just in general do something which is beneficial to him and act like Yuuji is as insignificant as he loves to yap that he is.

Well. Nope lmfao.

Somebody had said it is because they were one body before so they're unconsciously leaning into each other and cannot know of personal space and that headcanon is just a perfect way to explain this. They may "hate" each other but that longing to be close is winning the fight in this case. Isn't that sweet?

Like his actions seem both brutal yet... protective?

Ngl anon, Sukuna is brutal but this is as far away from his usual brutality as it can possibly be. Remember that this is a man whose CT is literally tearing something into shreds, who had cut a person in half, who had turned a literal teenager into little cubes for simply daring to attack him. That is Sukuna we were introduced to, the one who never gave a fuck about anyone and was pretty brutal. For him to be brutal now, he'd have to do something far worse than just throw a punch. Maybe finally start behaving like he feels? He claims he hates Yuuji and yet... doesn't fight him with visceral anger?

Ah... It's always something with these two lol. I'll miss them a lot.

[onlyjaeyun]

idk if you do requests, but could we get a pt.2 to the daddy? sorry sunghoong text fic where they have that talk he was texting abt ? you can disregard this if you dont want to do it, i totally understand 💕

this is the ask nonie's referring to btw!

— cw: dvddy kink, light dd/lg dynamics, implied phone s3x

honestly i think if there's one thing about sunghoon is the fact he's very open when it comes to you. he trusts you and knows he can always talk to you about whatever's on his mind, it doesn't matter what it's about, if he feels like talking to you about it (which is most of the time) he does not hesitate to do so.

however, kink talks aren't on the list of daily things to talk about, so he's not quite sure how to bring it up. every since you texted him that first "daddy?" sunghoon's been struggling to think about anything but you and the thought of hearing you actually use that title for him.

hoon never really expected himself to be into it because he simply never considered you to actually have a thing for it, so he's not really sure if you are, since you were actually just messing with him.

he attentively listens to your cute little story about your day with your best friend, loving the way you go into detail about basically everything, even which flavour of boba you had, which is why he hates himself for wanting to bring your texts from earlier up so bad.

once you're done, hoon's determined to ease you into it because he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable, but the mere possibility of you being into it just as much as he is, drives him insane. he's been rock hard the whole day and the fact this all happened when he's literally away from you for the first time for this long feels like destiny's laughing at him.

"hoonie? are you there? or did you fall asleep on me again?", you chuckle and sunghoon almost loses himself in the sweet tone of your voice; he can't stop thinking about how good you sound when you cum for him.

"i'm here, baby", he replies calmly, adjusting his boxers in hopes of somehow getting rid of his raging hard on, yet fails miserably and hisses the second he accidentally nudges the tip with his hand, "got lost in my thoughts, that's it."

"you sound tired, my love, do you wanna head to sleep?"

"no", he's way too quick with his response, eliciting another row of chuckles from you and this time sunghoon simply can't stop the words from spilling out.

"are you into it?" he asks and hates how a beat of absolute silence follows, because it lets him know you're more than aware what he's referring to and he feels a weird tightness spreading in his chest in response to your lack of.

"are you into it, sunghoon?" is the only thing you reply and are actually surprised to hear the sound of a deep grunt from the other line, the noise instantly shooting a jolt of arousal through your body.

"i never thought i would be", your boyfriend mumbles and you feel excitement fill your chest, "but i – fuck, baby i want it so bad."

the moment the profanity falls past your usually so composed boyfriend's lips, you let out the breath you didn't realise you were holding in and subconsciously start pressing your thighs together.

"you want me to call you daddy?"

there's not a lot you expected to hear in response to your question, yet nothing could have prepared you for the deep groan filling your ears.

"yes, baby", sunghoon's lost every bit of patience he had left, fingers firmly wrapped around his length, stroking himself to the thought of your perfect body, your sweet voice and the feeling of your pretty cunt the only thing on his mind.

"i want it, too", you whisper shyly, sighing softly when you finally push your pj shorts down your legs to expose your drenched cunt to the cold air in your room, "have been thinking about it for so long."

"fuck, angel girl, you're going to drive me crazy", sunghoon's voice is now raspy and strained, the firm sounds of his hand meeting his hips as he fucks his fist like a man gone mad easily sending chills down your body, "be a good girl for daddy and cum with me, yeah? i need it so bad, baby."

and how could you deny a reaquest this sweet, right?

[so-many-fandoms-here]

hi! idk if youre taking requests atm so in case u don’t, feel free to ignore this :-) anyways, i’ve been obsessed with the way you write and i was wondering if you could write something with niragi, inspired by house of balloons by the weeknd!! i think his character kinda suits the lyrics so i thought that could be fun!! it can be anything rlly, smut, angst or just anything :-) tysm and have a good good day!!! 🫶🫶🫶

Heyy :)) This is my first request since quite a while so I'm actually pretty excited right now :D Thank you so much <3

I listened to the song a few times beforehand and you're right, it really suits Niragi.

I took a lot inspiration from these verses:

You look into my eyes You can't recognize my face You're in my world now

So just don't blame it on me, girl 'Cause you wanted to have fun

Oh this is fun fun (...) This is fun to me

—

(English isn’t my first language so feel free to correct any mistake you notice)

• Characters: Suguru Niragi, fem!Reader

• Genre: Angst

• Warnings: abuse, bullying

Remember

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:

I have no idea how I was able to survive so long without anyone by my side. I lived like a stray dog for weeks until I met these really nice guys (who probably just wanted to fuck me). They had a fucking car and told me about this place.

The Beach. That's how they called it. It used to be a resort back in the real world. Some crazy guy, Hatter, found it and created some cult-like society. I didn't had the best gut feeling but anything was better than my current situation. So I let them touch my tits a few times and in return they took me with them.

The Beach was a way bigger deal than I thought. Dozens of players lived here and there was food, water and electricity. This place was actually alive.

Yes, it still was a weird cult-like place, but a safe place afterall. I was just supposed to bring the cards I own to Hatter (they didn't exaggerate, this man was definetly some kind of crazy) and had to wear swimwear so I couldn't hide any weapons on my body, which actually made sense to me.

The guys that brought me here explained a bit more to me. At first I didn't want to listen, but when they mentioned the militants I started to pay attention. Because they where allowed to carry weapons with them.

I didn't really care about anything else they had to say about them.

They where allowed to carry weapons with them!

Call me paranoid but I would feel so much more safe around here if I had a gun or something. These people might be in the same boat with me but everyone would safe themselves first from drowning. Me too.

They wanted to survive. I wanted to survive. And in the time I was here I lost a lot of my empathy because it would get me killed in the blink of an eye.

"Who is the leader of those executives?", I ask, swirling my (h/c) hair around my right index finger while putting on my best doggy eyes.

They looked at me like I was just as crazy as Hatter but after a few seconds of hesitation they answered anyways. "Aguni. Really short hair, scar on his face. It doesn't matter though, you instantly feel that he is the leader, when you are around him."

I took note of the facts about his appearence anyways, just in case.

"He is never alone though. His comrades are like flies, pretty sure this man doesn't even shit alone." I ignored his comment and was already looking around.

"Imma head to my room guys", I said without looking at the men. "I'm tired." They either didn't caught my lie, or they simply didn't care. They just nodded and let me head off.

I was of course not going to my room. I was way too curious about this Aguni. The things I would do for a stupid gun...

The sun was long gone when I saw him. The boys where right, he had this aura that basically screamed at you. And as expected, he wasn't alone.

For a second my confidence began to fade. Did I really want to talk to this guy? Would that be as smart as I thought? But I caught myself quickly again. I would die one way or another, where is the difference if it's through a game or his hands?

After I took a deep breath I stood up from my chair I had sit on and walked straight up to him. People stared, some whispered but I ignored them.

"Are you Aguni?" I ask him when I arrived in front of him but before he could even think of an answer another man slipped around him and build himself up in front of me. A big gun rested on his shoulder and the amused look in his dark eyes showed that he wasn't afraid to use it.

But there was something else in his eyes. Something so familiar but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Maybe we went to school together? That wasn't so unlikely based on how many people were here.

"Do you really think our boss has time for a stupid chick like you?", he asked while he grinned like an idiot. A hand placed itself on his shoulder and shoved him to the side. "Niragi." A voice scolded him.

The name didn't ring a bell. I probably saw him around school sometimes. Based on how he acted here he probably was one of those bullies in school that degraded literally anyone. You didn't even need to look or act different, sometimes you where just at the wrong place at the wrong time and your school year was literally over.

"Let her talk", the voice appeared again. Agunis voice.

I tried to make myself taller than I was and tried so desperatly to look brave, that I probably looked like a fool. "I want to join the militants."

I held my breath while biting my tongue. I really didn't know what to expect. Maybe he would kill me right on the spot? Or maybe not. I didn't know which one I would prefer.

He tilted his head and eyed me from head to toe. "It's not that easy." "I don't care!", I interrupted him and felt the heat spreading into my face immediatly after I spoke.

There was silence for a short while and I was absolutely sure that someone would kill me on the spot, but then he laughed quietly which scared me even more. "Or maybe it is that easy after all", he said eventually.

I felt the burning eyes of his subordinants and for a second I thought I would throw up on Agunis feet. "I like you. You're in."

I didn't know what just happened. It was so much yet nothing. All it took was for me to interrupt the leader? This had to be a trap, right?

"Nobody dared to talk to me like that since I came here", Aguni explained. "Don't think I would tolerate it, I don't, but at least you're somewhat reckless. If you're reckless in other aspects too, this could work." His hand dissapeared in the pocket of his jeans and came back out with a pair of keys which he handed Niragi. "Show her the guns."

Niragi looked far from happy about this order. "Why me?", he asked rather irritated. Aguni looked him dead in the eyes. "'Cuz you're my right hand. And you do what I say."

It looked like Niragi wanted to say something but bit his tongue. Instead he turned around and stormed off. Without saying a word I followed him, now even more scared than I was before.

Niragi walked quick and with big steps he crossed the halls of The Beach. At a heavy door he stopped and turned around to wait for me. "Hurry up!", he yelled annoyed while waiting for me. Slightly out of breath I stopped next to him and looked while he opened the door which revealed a rather dark stairwell that only lead down. "It's downstairs", he explained before starting to walk again.

I tried my best to stay beside him while we walked down where I supposed was the basement. Here were probably the generators and all that kind of stuff.

We crossed another long hallway until he stopped at the last door on the right side. Then he used the key to unlock the door and before I could process everything properly I found myself between dozens of weapons and guns.

Niragi pushed me inside and quickly closed the door behind him. Then he locked it and turned around to look me in the eyes. Fear crawled up my throat and my heart started to beat faster than it ever did in my whole life.

"Long time no see (Y/n)", he said. The keys dissapeared into his pockets so I had no chance to get them. Confusion mixed with my fear. "You know my name?"

His smile appeared back on his face for a second but then faded again. "How could I forget?"

My confusion grew while I desperatly tried to remember from where I could possibly know him.

"Come on", he cooed while he looked at me with expectant eyes. "Don't you remember?" He raised his free hand, made a circle with his thumb and index finger and held it in front of his eye, mimicking glasses, while tilting his head to the side. Then he pushed his lower lip slightly in front of his upper lip, frowning exaggerated.

It hit me with such force that I felt nauseous again. The sad face he put was badly played, but I could see it anyways. I saw the boy with the glasses in front of me, crying while my brother swung the baseball bat. "There it is", Niragi whispered. "The recognicion."

All those years I tried my best to forget these eyes. And I did. But now it seemed like this was a huge mistake.

„When I saw you upstairs my stomach dropped. I thought one of us would die when Aguni said I should show you the guns. The thought of all the feelings you could bring up again did something to me but I must admit that it’s rather pleasant to be alone with you.“

I stumbled back, tried to get more distance between us but Niragi instantly closed the distance again by taking the same amount of steps in my direction I took to get away from him. Not because I was scared, not only, but because I was emberrassed.

"How's your brother?" My eyes locked with his. As I looked longer into them I see how broken they are. Just like back then, but still different somehow. The eyes that looked into my direction, screaming for help, which I avoided like the plague because the guilt shook through me. The guilt that I didn’t dare to help him.

My brother made me look how they tortured him and for everytime I looked away, he would hit me when we got home. With his fist, with his belt or he would throw plates or glasses at me.

"I'm sorry", I whispered, tears stinging in my eyes. Again I avoided his eyes but I couldn't for long because his hand found my face and forced me to look at him.

"I remember your black eyes, the gross swelling shimmering a different color everyday", he whispered and I felt his breath on my face. "Blue, violet, yellow, like a violent, ugly rainbow."

Niragis eyes studied my face, stopping at the scar over my eyebrow. I knew he looked at it because I it suddenly started to throb just like the day I got it.

"That was for when I didn't threw the baseball at you", I answered before he could ask anything about it. It felt good to remind him, remind me, that I didn't want this to happen. When I refused to, he threw a mug at me. It broke it half when it landed on the floor, then he picked it up and threw it again. It cut into my skin leaving the about 2 inch long scar behind

"Where is he now?", he asked still inspecting my scar. I shrugged my shoulders. "I came here alone." I was scared that he might thought I was lying but he seemed to believe me, which made me relax a bit.

"He'd be surprised what his little games did to me. What I have become…" He let go of me but I still looked at him. "I always liked you, you know? You understood." I nodded. "I will kill him if I ever see him again." I nodded again. "And will make him suffer how I suffered." I nodded a third time while I took a glance at his pierced tongue. The pictures of the dirty needle my brother pushed through it popped up in my head again.

"I will find him and then we will play my game." Niragi walks up to one of the shelves and took a gun, rather small compared to his, then some ammo and handed it to me. "Our game."

I looked at the gun in his hand. It was my choice. If I take it I would make a pact with him. I hated my brother with all my heart but I was still hesitant. Is vigilantism the way? My way?

"It's your choice", Niragi reminded me. I took the gun. There is no justice in Borderland, so why not make it myself?

"I will make it my world", he said. "Where no one will look down on me ever again. On us."

His eyes practically burned into mine but I couldn't look away. My iris's where tied to his and I wondered if somewhere inside was still the Niragi I met in the past or if it destroyed him completly.

[pandoraroid]

The Pack Wedding 💥💥💥💗💥

reaction rambles bc yes

please keep in mind this is meant to be lighthearted i love these men with all my heart n life n soul

THIS IS 43 MINUTES IM SO SCARED WHY CANT I PRESS THE VIDEO this is too much nervousness for seven in the morning im dead

DAVEEEYYYYY HIIIIIII GMORNING MWAAAA

"it's the pack everything's gonna go crazy." bro it's the SHAW pack what does that say about you hm 🤔 /j i love you david 

"reception's gonna be a solstice party on steriods" I SNORTED SO DAMN LOUD 😭

now should be a good time to say that part of the reason why i like redacted so much is because it's so funny and lines like that do it for me every single time.

"i love you angel so very much" BOOGSH 💥 im so in love with you david shaw 

i think bro's in love with us guys idk 

"beautiful... you.." NO YOU 🫵 david we are not doing this back in forth in the morning JUST ACCEPT IT

he's triggering my cuteness/love aggression SO FUCKING SAPPY I LUV U MWAH

"you fucking menace c'mere" HIS LAUGH OMFG GOOD FUCKINH MORNINGGGG

IS ASHER NEXT PLEASE TELL ME HE'S NEXT 

MY MAN MY MAN MY MAN

"oh fuck it's the day" me just this morning

"asher breathe we're good you've been training for this your whole life" ELABORATE???? id love to know how exactly youve been training for this asher

"it's our wedding day. holy shit it's our wedding day. i'm gonna be a husband." KILLL MEEE RIGHT NOW I CAN HEAR HIM SMILEEE OMFG WEAR THAT SHIT WITH PRIDE ASHER

"i've always been husband material look at what we're working with" KILL ME RIGHT NOW /pos baabe smacking him though HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

id kiss you for the rest of my life asher

laughing against/while kissing THIS MAN WANTS ME DEAD

"say how much time do we have before we meet everybody in the lobby" LET THEM FUCKING WAIT

MILO AND SAM???? OH MY GOD???? (should go without fucking saying but... drive safe..... please...)

in my head: sam is driving. david's shotgun. ash & milo are in the back. just because. >> BRO I WAS RIGHT????

darlin driving in another car with the other mates??? that... isnt what i think it is.... is it......

david sounds so tired of their bs HAHAHA "rounded out with a little traditional opinion from them of all people" DARLIN FIGHT BACK

"hey we're fun too, right?" ASHER PLEASE

"well let's see: we've got a grouchy grandpa drivin us-" 

"hey." 

"at least he didn't call you cowboy." BRO

"now don't you start." 

"and we got the grumpy alpha."

"i'm not grumpy. just preoccupied."

"right. right." bros didnt even try to sound convinced

"we're fun." 

"asher. we spent your bachelor party playing destiny 2." 

"and smash!" 

"oh my mistake."

this entire conversation. peak.

"i dont even wanna imagine what chaos those four are getting up to piled in one vehicle." OH WOULDNT YOU LIKE TO SAM 

DEAD ASS SILENCE I LOVE IT i cant fycking breathe this is too funny.

in my head, they were definitely arguing over directions. or darlin's driving, or making fun of the other car.

wait darlin what

"or you'll likely end up staring down the maw of my own beautiful mate-" SAMUEL COLLINS

"oh move it mr. wedding day" WHY DOES THAT SOUND SO GOOD

"and fix your hair."

"it's suppose to look like this!"

"are you trying to look like you got married in a wind tunnel?" BRO NOT ON HIS WEDDING DAY 💀

sam encouraging milo omgomg

"you talk more than anyone i know. and i know asher." AHAHHAHAHAHAHA

"is my tie on straight?" 

"is it ever?" is the one wearing it straight /jjjj

david helping him with his tie someone kill me right now

GABE'S CHILI RECIPE WHAT

"why did you pick me?" OH SHIT

i seriously just listened and payed attention to their conversation so no thoughts head empty only them

"what really mattered in a beta was having a person that was the other side of your coin."

"i picked you because you were the one person i trusted more than anyone else. you made me feel safe at a time more than i couldve explained. you were everything i wasnt. where i was distant you were outgoing. where i was rough you were warm. where i was analytical you were intuitive. you're the other side of my coin. you always have been. so it never mattered to me what anyone else thought of what i needed in a beta because they didnt know me. i did. you did. and i needed the person that was right for me not for anybody else."

i couldve typed out everything david said but THIS!!!! I WAS SOBBING!!!! THEY ARE THE OTHER SIDE OF OTHER'S COIN NEVER FORGET THAT!!!!!!!! their vows to each other fr

this is wrecking me THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH

"you're too hard on yourself too."

"well we had to have something in common other than destiny and smash bros, right?" the range of friendship everyone 

THEYRE HOLDING BACK TEARS IN THIS ONE TRUST ME 

my heart felt so heavy in this WHY

"i think you're the best fucking beta i could have ever asked for. i think you're the besy friend i could have ever asked for. i deserved most of the time."

aaaanndd got heavier 😁

GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG GROUP HUG

"i just feel bad that i'm going to be up there looking this good y'know people are going to get confused on whose wedding day it really is." EAT EM UP SWEETHEART (i meant milo but them too ofc)

"do we get a step stool for behind the podium?" HAHSHAHAHAHHA THE CONCERN IN HIS VOICE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

"i love you milo"

"i love you too asshole" CRYING 

"thank you for doing this milo"

"i got you. always." ALWAYS.

CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY CEREMONY 

"when i was asked by my friends to officiate their unions, i only had one question for them: how much does it pay?" ASKING THE REAL QUESTIONS

im really listening on this part so head empty.

oohh asher (i think it's asher) laughing through baabe's vows IS SO SWEET I LOVE YOU AND I ALWAYS WILL

OH DAVID GETTING CHOKED UP ON ANGEL'S VOWS KILL ME

"you're the best part of me. and i'll spend the rest of our lives showing that i'm worthy of that." oh david shaw you dont even have to try

"i now pronounce you all married the-the pairs of you to each other not all together" OH THEY ARE NEVER GOING TO LET HIM LIVE THAT DOWN

THE KISSES OMMMGGGKFHEKHEJSS 

CONGRATULATIONS ANGEL & DAVID

CONGRATUALTIONS BABE & ASHER MWAAAAAAAAHH TO ALL OF YOUUU

[beatcroc]

shadow t. hedgehog

shadow was like THE favorite character for teen me, to the point where he was part of my online username and...representation, but these days i enjoy him just a regular amount and i'd only really slip him in at the very bottom of my top 10 sonic characters. that being said,

oh boy.

i think shadow is going to be an extremely loaded character no matter which angle you're approaching him from. theres just 🤌 so much nuance.

"canon" in this case is referring to the infamous sega mandates restricting anyone from doing anything good with him. pretty much everyone in the position to DO anything with his characterization [writers, voice actors, etc] has very strong and really great ideas about where his character should be headed, and it has all continually clashed with the company's heads' ideas about him . literally everyone who's made any sort of official sonic media the past several years has made comments like 'yeah sega is super fucking protective of him he's hard to do anything with'. that being said, it seems like the fight has paid off and the worst of the limitations on his portrayals are dissolving. dark beginnings was fantastic, i've heard good things about shadow gens, and the sonic 3 movie does very well with him as well; i'm willing to cautiously trust things now, but boy he sure does have a fucking history. there's also the matter of his wildly inconsistent characterization in earlier days but i didnt play most of those games so i dont really care about any of that lol. anyway tldr: writer canon kicks ass, sega canon eat my dick.

now......... with regard to "everyone else", fanon does have tons of fun stuff for shadow wrt to the majority of the cast --ESPECIALLY maria oh my god, and of course team dark content never gets old; i do really genuinely love this stuff-- but....... vast swaths of people just don't quite seem to get that he just straight up doesn't like sonic. he respects sonic and his abilities sure, but they're not gonna be, like, friends [MUCH LESS LOVERS??????????] because shadow just thinks hes really abrasive. i feel like this shouldn't be hard. some people just have clashing ideals and arent going to get along or want to be around eachother save for some other circumstance that may force them to cooperate.

nuance on "if anything happens to him" ties back into the first point in that.... well... idk, he's a character who's interesting to see when facing adversity; i wouldn't cry about it like "my baby getting hurt" the same way i would for, like, the scrapniks, but in the same token the dude has suffered Enough can we Please do something else with him im Tired of suffering being all he has. let him move on. [again, what i've heard of shadow gens bodes well for this but you can never trust this fucking franchise]

as for the other stuff, shadow isn't really "silly" for his own purposes, but he is just kind of an inherently absurd character when you take in the full breadth of it. he's an edgy loner immortal antihero but then the voice actor saying he does like a bunch of charity work and volunteers at soup kitchens and shit. and he is correct for this like that would literally be an awesome path for shadow's character. it's silly. one of my friends thinks he should be lurking at tim horton's [because dunkin donuts is too social] with a laptop writing some overcomplex YA novel and i could not be more in favor of that. he's The Ultimate Lifeform:tm: and also just some fucking guy and a grumpy old man and its SILLY. shadow is a man of contrasts and thats what makes him awesome. he's effortlessly cool and badass and has an unfuckwithable vibe/aesthetic that demands respect but also he eats coffee beans with a spoon. and you let him do it because its Shadow The Fucking Hedgehog.

[e1izaaxkles]

Hiiii

Okay but like...imagine you notice weird things going on around your apartment...things go missing, stuff is moved, little things like that, but you don't think much of it. But then imagine you wake up one night to a noise and you see this tall figure standing at the end of your bed going through things on your vanity. The figure hears you and turns around before pinning you down with his large hand clamped around your mouth. (I can't decide if you should know Ted or not so you can decide that). He ends up fucking you, lots of "I've been waiting for this for so long." "I'm gonna make you so happy." "All mine now." "My little dolly". You know, cute shit like that. (Also IDK how you'd want to incorporate this but i'm also like imagining that scene in The Boy where the dude has the girls dress and like recreated her on his bed?) Anyway, name of Jesus Christ, Amen

I’m gonna do what I did in Stalker and make reader a fan but she isn’t an insomniac??? Howwww???

“Wait, how did you get in?”

Ted Nivison x afab!reader

MDNI I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN

You are having a normal day, taking a shower at 9, doing skincare, going back into your room, and watching Ted Nivison’s videos on your laptop until 11 then going to sleep. You wake up from a nice dream a sex dream at about 4 or 5 am. You look ahead of you and see a tall figure rummaging through your stuff. “Wha-“ You start but you're too tired to finish your sentence. It could just be a delusion, right? “Hello, sweetheart.” You hear come from the tall man. He sounds like Ted Nivison.. You think. “Are you Ted Nivison?” You ask, being too sleepy to even care. “Why don’t you find out?” He chuckles softly as he comes closer to you. You can see the reflection from the window off his glasses and your eyes widen. “The fuck? Why are you in my house?” “I didn’t expect you to say that.” “Then what did you expect?” You rub your eye tiredly. “Well, I expected you to have a fangirl moment. You do have pictures of me everywhere.” He says as he opens his arms as if offering a hug. In his right hand, you see him holding a pair of your lacy panties that your friend had bought you for your 18th birthday. Ted crawls into your bed and pins you down as if you were going to try and run. Like, dude? You’re too tired, duh. You wake up a little more and realize the situation more. “If I fall asleep you can continue whatever you started.” You say to him as a smirk appears on his face. “Whatever you say, princess.” He says as he nips at your neck. You put your hands under his shirt and pull it over his head, discarding it to the floor. He does the same to your shirt and starts to nip at the new bare skin. A couple of whines leave your mouth which motivates him to leave marks. What feels like only a few seconds pass and both of you are naked, he’s lying on his back as you look at him with tired, almost innocent eyes. His large hand cups your cheek and his thumb rubs the skin there. You lean into his touch, almost falling asleep. “Stay with me, darling.” He whispers. “Mm..” You mumble out as his hands move to your hips, he then flips you around so you’re on your back underneath him. He puts the tip to your entrance and slowly pushes forward, loving the way you whimper at the pleasure. He pushes all the way in in one swift movement making you let out a whine. “Fuck- so tight..” Ted groans out. “T-Teddy- please-“ You whine out as he starts slow thrusts, letting out groans of your name or how wet you are. “Been waiting for this for so long, gonna make you so much more happy than that last douche- fuck.” He says as his thrusts pick up pace and your moans grow louder. “Fuck!- S-so close- please, Teddy!” You moan out, you definitely weren’t falling back asleep now. “Fuck- gonna cum!” You let out an almost pornographic moan making Ted’s eyes widen and lips part slightly. “Cum for me, darling.” He says into your ear as you clench down on him, cumming on his cock. This throws him over the edge and he cums inside you, pulling out and moving down to your cunt that’s leaking with yours and his mixed cum. “My little dolly now, mine too play with whenever I want.” He mumbles as he licks a stripe up your clit before sucking on it, moans leaving your mouth as your hands meet his hair, you feel two of his huge fingers enter you, even louder moans coming out of your mouth now. “Fuck- Ted!” He looks up at you and the sight almost makes you cum on the spot. His fingers go quick inside you drawing loud moans and whimpers from your mouth. You cum on his fingers and he works you through it before pulling his fingers out of you and sucking your cum off, lapping up any last bit he didn’t get. He gets up and walks into your bathroom, getting a rag and cleaning the two of you up. He then goes over to your dresser and pulls out some clean clothes for you and getting in his bag for his own clothes- was he planning this? He walks back over to you and helps you get dressed and then he’s dressed himself. He crawls into bed beside you and pulls you into him. “I love you, Y/n.” “I love you too, Teddy.” You close your eyes to go to sleep. “Wait- how did you get in?”

[defectivefanboy]

You’re better when you’re quiet

trying to take a moment to yourself in teyvat you decided to take a walk around the land, but it didn’t help much when it slowly became taking out treasure hoarders, hilichurl camps. Just to make it better, you took out one wrong fatui camp and the silhouette of a man casted a shadow behind you. Seems you both could use a stress reliever…

Overall notes: While this story doesn't use specified pronouns for the reader, it is AMAB and is written for the gays and they's. My boys and... bOiis? idk but it isn't written with female in mind, same with all my other stories. if you don't like that, find another blog. don't know what to tell ya.

C/W: NSFW. sub scara. top!male!reader. cursing. hate fuck. choking. degradation. praise if you squint. hair pulling scratching impact play yah da yah da. bit of blood. disappointment in myself. the fact ill have to explain some things to my friends bc i let them read these :’)

Notes: Minors DNI. this is old asf this was written on oct 13th 2021. So this is when scara was still thought to just a rumor of a playable character. he literally only came up in game once and then the trailer dropped. I crack up reading this

you’re better when you’re quiet.

     It was supposed to be a peaceful walk. Supposed to help you, y’know, clear your mind. Yet, it only made you feel worst. After having to deal with a night full of drunkards you were tired of people for the day. So once you completed your daily commissions for the guild, you set yourself off for a simple walk.

And simple was the last thing it was.

     First it was the treasure hoarders roaming around the place. Next it was the uncleared camps that the normal knights should've taken care of, and it’s still too early for Diluc to take his nightly patrol. That would’ve been fine if it wasn’t for the Fatui.

    Of course when you were finally able to take a breathe, a mob of them were gathered within a small clearing surrounded by trees. At this point, you just sighed, because either way,

you were going to be the one dealing with them.

     After getting shoulder checked into a tree, to almost be hammered into the ground like a nail. You were over it. Over the pain. The soreness. Over the fighting. Oust over everything. Like the snap of a rubber band your sword slashed the last of them as you stared off blankly.

     Before you were able to let your guard down for a moment, a figure had to appeared behind you. Only to be luckier, the shadow had casted a large outline of a rather familiar hat. Turning around and clicking your tongue on your teeth, you gave a glare to the male.

     “Wow. Not even a word in and you already look like you want to kill me. Color me impressed, Honorary Knight.” With a low laugh at the end, the male lifted his head as he held a smirk on his face.

     Letting out a low groan you brought your empty hand up to your face. “I don’t believe now is a good time to be a brat.”

his smirked dropped at the name. A what? Who do you think you are. A brat? Absolutely not. He was about to make way to you when you took the first step.

“Ah, ah, ah. Not a step, I'm in control today, doll” stepping close enough to hold his face in your hands. You grab his cheeks with your hand with a sinister smile on your face. One that could be mistaken for a innocent one if you didn’t know any better.

     If anyone were to look, if they even could, Scaramouche was wide eye at your actions. It quickly changed into a look of annoyance as he was about to say something, most likely yell. Though, before he could get a word out or even a letter, you shut him up as you placed your lips on his in a rough kiss.

     Frozen once again his eyes went wide. The thought to push you off did cross him mind as he brought a hand up letting off light sparks of electricity, but the kiss you had him in was a terrible poison. So intoxicating and addicting, yet so deadly and dangerous. Kissing back, his body relaxed moving his raised hand to your hair as it became tangled in it.

     As the kiss grew more heated you both pulled each other closer as you fight for dominance over the other. That was quickly shut down as you grabbed his ass and lifted him up, pushing him back into a tree. Keeping him caged between you and the perfectly place tree.

     “What would happen if someone saw you like this, doll? Think they would still see you has the high and mighty Harbringer? or just a horny puppet in my hands.” Hiking a knee between his legs, lightly grasping at his neck. He bit back a moan, closing his eyes and clenching his legs.

     Pushing your leg up further, you move a hand down to his waist before trailing his jaw and neck with kisses. Leaving dark marks as you trail further down he lets out small whines and hushed moans as he lightly grinds down on your leg. His hands move from around your neck down to the bottom of your shirt, trailing his hands up your chest, before you removed it completely.

     Placing your own hands under his top you lifted it passed his head, revealing his chest as you trailed your kisses down, leaving marks on his chest in your wake. Removing your leg from between his, he let out a low whine, stopping once you filled in the spot with yourself, letting him wrap his legs around your waist. “Awe.. was someone enjoying that?” you whispered moving close to his ear. 

     “And you seem to have a death wish you perverted freak.” He spoke through his clenched teeth with a hiss as you pulled him down against your bulge. “Hmmm..? What was that love? I couldn't hear you. Could you speak up for me?” placing your forehead on his you pushed yourself further into him as you begun grinding at a slow pace. 

    Light gasp came out of his mouth before he bit his tongue and his hold around your neck became tighter. Only letting out a low laugh you begun fiddle with his shorts, he brought his hands to your hair and pulled your neck to close him as he begun to leave marks of his own. Pulling down his shorts you brought your hand to the tent that had formed, precum leaving a stain in the fabric.

     “If i didn’t know any better i would say you’re quite happy about this. Am I right, Scara? before you could say anything more, he bit down on your neck harshly breaking the skin drawing a bit of blood out that he lapped up with his tongue. “you speak one more time i’ll-... fuck” he cut himself off with a moan as your hand pulled back the fabric and began to jerk him off.

     “Awe.. What happened, darling? Cat got your tongue?” you smirked as his hands pulled at the back of your hair as he tried holding himself up, but the motion of your hand was telling him a plan. He was about to open his mouth and speak, but you shoved two fingers into his mouth to keep him silent.

    “You’re much better when you’re quiet, doll” moving your head back to his neck, leaving more marks on the other side. He sucked on your fingers, twirling his tongue around them. His hands had moved to your waist pulling at your pants, even lifting his waist up to pull them down as he fiddled with the fabric to pull your cock out.

     Sitting back on your waist he placed your dick next to his as he began to jerk you both off in a sloppily manner, short gasp coming out of his mouth––

––and thats where I had left off and I'm too embarrassed and shy to write anymore :')

hope you enjoyed