#idk informal spanish has a place in my heart

[mxxnkirby]

my favorite thing ever is informal spanish writing because its just so phonetically correct and because you can really tell what kinda accent they have from the spellings like someone spelling sour cream as saro krin is probably from somewhere else than someone who says sao krema. or writing guerita instead of werita or writing pankekes instead of pankeis

[beananacake]

The Accidental Princess (Part 6)

Prince Kit x Reader

Synopsis: A contract has been found, after twenty years, bearing your name and the Prince Kit's... bound in matrimony.

Chapter Summary: A solution has been considered for your predicament. You and the Princess Chelina go to the town square and you make another disturbing revelation.

Word Count: 8.3k words

Warnings: period-typical misogyny, badly translated Spanish sentences, mentions of poisoning, scientific names of plants (is that a warning??) that's it??

A/N: Hello again everyone!! Long time no update! I'm so sorry it took a while to churn this out. Had been busy with my health and with paperwork and life, in general. Not to mention, I did sorta lose interest in this but i feel like it's a story worth telling. So here's 8.3k of too-many-things-going-on to make up for it. Anyway, TAGLIST is still OPEN! (especially now that idk when I'll be updating again) Thoughts, reviews, comments, suggestions, requests (and reblogs) are very much welcome. Not beta'd, we die like men. Please enjoy Part 6 of The Accidental Princess!

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Epilogue

You are here to divorce Kit. You are not here to fall in love with him, you thought as you left your room.

Yet, you managed to do so, falling with all your heart and soul and being. It was impossible not to. He made you feel alive and beautiful, worthy of being loved by someone you love. He was the prince in your fairy tales come to life and it was unfortunate that you were not the princess destined to be with him. The princess for him—the born-princess—was Princess Chelina. It was not you and, in your heart, you knew the bitter truth of it. You were not the chosen one for Kit.

You walked to the library silently, sullenly, book clutched to your chest. You promised yourself to keep Kit away from your thoughts. Instead, you would dedicate the day to helping the King and the Grand Duke with the problem you caused. The laws and politics of the kingdom held all the answers to your problems.

You had read through almost all of Queen Amalie’s books and found the same information as the rest of them. You were tired of reading the same passage over and over again, even from different volumes, and now you were set on getting a book about the laws of the land. It was nearly impossible to find one because the Grand Duke had sequestered for himself the shelves that held the tomes. He believed that you were to cause more harm than good. Frankly, it was insulting especially the way he told you of it, but you understood his reasoning. You did have placed yourself and Kit in this position.

A position you do not wish to rid yourself of, you said to yourself. A situation that you never thought you wished to remain in for as long as you lived because you had someone you loved and who loved you in return.

I love you for who you are, you heard Kit’s voice in your mind say. You’ve possessed me. You own my heart and my soul. Everything I am is now yours.

You shook your head, clearing your mind of the memory of his confession, of the look in his eyes, of the conviction in his voice. No, you thought yourself with a steely resolve and an aching heart. No more. You were here to divorce the prince. It was why the king had asked of you to come to the palace. It was why you refused to tell Kit that you loved him.

You entered the library, craning your neck and finding no one else inside the room. You replaced the botany and herbology book with the others in its collection and made your way to the section of the laws of the kingdom.

You did not know where to start. You had not been in a situation as such before but you knew it was best to start perusing the law books for the solution. Bringing down a number of tomes and setting them down on the table, you proceeded to go over the pages to look for anything that would solve your plight. You skimmed through passages and bylaws, going through books in record speed but finding none that helped in your predicament.

It had been hours after and you had not made any improvements since you had started. You did, however, learn more of the history of the kingdom and the various decrees pertaining to land owning and of trading and selling. You brought the last of the books you had taken down from the shelves to you, opening it and watched as the pages part to a chapter marked with a piece of parchment. Curious, you went to that section and read through it.

There was no writing on the parchment but you held on to it to replace it once you were done with passage. The ink had faded from the page but the words were still discernible. It told of the kingdom, most especially the rules on the owners of some plots of lands throughout the king’s territory. Your eyes swept over the page, seeing words of ridges and islands and ownership by the queen. You skimmed through most of it, not fully reading it if until you saw the words “matrimony” and “divorce” or any other derivatives of those. When your search proved futile, you flipped to another page.

You riffled through the whole of the book once more and again, like with all the tomes before it, there had been nothing about divorces. You took to replacing all of the books back in the shelves but as you were to pick out another set, you heard the footfalls on the carpeted floor.

You turned, finding the king’s secretary making his way to you. Your stomach fell at the thought of speaking with the king. He would have known of his son’s confession to you a week since. Surely, he would have words to tell you about it. It was the opposite of what he was trying to achieve. He wanted you to be separated but instead, he would find his son attached and in love with you.

The man bowed before you. “Your Royal Highness,” he said.

You felt your throat close in on itself at your title. Of course the man knew. He had been the one who found the marriage certificate between you and Kit. And he was the only one to address you appropriately.

“Your presence is required in the Great Study.”

You cleared your throat, bobbing a quick nod at the man. “Of course. Please, lead the way.”

You clasped your hands together, feeling them cold and sweaty and you wiped them on your skirt. If they could not find any solution to your marriage, perhaps the next course of action was to keep you locked in the dungeons for treachery or some other law that would apply to you. That was one way to be rid of you.

The walk to the Great Study suddenly felt longer than it usually took. You knew you were scared of what the king would say, especially if he had found out that his son loved you, instead of the princess they had chosen for him. You could not make it your case that you were in love with Kit as well. That would have incriminated you. It would do nothing to the predicament but only make it much more complicated than it already was.

You stepped in the Great Study, still as nervous. At the massive table before the fireplace sat the king. The Grand Duke sat on his own table, much smaller than the king’s but equally busy.

“Thank you, Giles. Child, come forward.” The king said.

You walked over to them, curtsying when you stopped. “Your Majesty. Your Grace.”

“Yes, yes,” the king said distractedly. “There are some matters I would like to ask you, Y/N.”

Stomach rolling, you nodded. “Of course, Sir.”

“You know very well the purpose as to why you were brought here,” he started. He rose from his seat and started to make his way to you.

The Grand Duke remained in his seat but his eyes were kept on your person. There seemed to be an unusual glint in them, not quite like the ire that was ever-present but something more triumphant.

You nodded mutely, eyes returning on the king. “Yes, Sir.”

“I believe we have found a solution to the problem. There is, however, the small matter of us knowing a few details before we pass this on to the magistrate.”

You nodded again.

The king looked around the room and nodded the footmen away. When the last footfalls vanished behind the sound of closing doors, the monarch cleared his throat.

“This solution we have found, it requires the assistance of a physician.”

“A physician?” you asked in a small voice. As nervous as you were, you knew this conversation would not have anything to do with Kit’s confession. That meant, then, that the king had not heard of it at all. You did not know if you were relieved or all the more nervous.

The Grand Duke now stood and looked at you with a stare that made you shiver in repulsion. You could not name the very glint that was in his eyes but you knew, whatever it was to come out of his mouth, it would be disgusting to you.

“Why else would we need a physician for?” The nobleman asked, tone mocking. He did not wait for you to answer his question. Instead, he carried on with an air of nonchalance. “Of course, it is to see if you still have your virtue intact,” he spat.

You recoiled at the statement, stepping back at the surprise of it. His delivery of it was callous and casual as though it was an everyday pronouncement he was to say.

“I beg your pardon?” you exclaimed, offended, words leaving your mouth without another thought.

“The only proof needed is word that the union has not been consummated. The magistrate will surely grant the divorce once we have word and we submit the contract with his findings.” The king told you. He was not as tactless in his delivery as the Grand Duke but he was not careful in it as well.

You felt as though you were merely being treated as an object that was for them to prod and examine. You straightened, refusing to shrink at their words. You turned back to the offending nobleman.

“Your Grace,” you said with a hard tone, affronted that he seemed to imply that you were clumsy with your virtue. “There is no need for a physician to check on me. I can assure you that my virtue is intact and that I had not had any sort of relations at all.”

He harrumphed. “It is stipulated in the law. We are not to just take your word that you are still a virgin as you claim to be and not a loose woman.” He sneered. “Who knows? You could be lying again, like you had when you had the prince sign the marriage contract after telling him it was for friendship.”

“So, you shall subject me to an inspection by the physician immediately instead of looking for other… less invasive procedures?” you asked him rather boldly. What he was asking of you was more than just invasion of your physicality as a woman. He questioned your very morals as a lady.

“Remember why you are here, Y/N,” the king warned. “Need I remind you that you brought this upon yourself.”

You turned to the king. “I do not need reminding, Your Majesty. I am always made aware of what I had done. Rarely a day goes by without the Grand Duke sneering at me for my fault.”

You stood tall, eyes returning to the Grand Duke. “But may I also remind you, sir, that I am not just any person in this household. I am the prince’s wife. I have let all of you tread on me as though I am merely the ground you walk on. I believe I am entitled to a modicum of respect, if not for being Kit’s wife, then at least for being human.”

“Respect?” The Grand Duke fumed. He went puce on the face at your request. “You wish to ask for respect after insulting me!”

“I did not insult you, Your Grace,” you told him simplistically.

“You and your vulgar mouth! You demand respect yet you do not give it to me!” He shouted.

You wetted your lips, taking a deep breath as you continued looking at the angry man. “Forgive me for not submitting to your will, Your Grace, but I implore you to see that you have not afforded me the same treatment I had been giving you. Just because I am not born into nobility does not mean that I should not be respected. I am human, sir, as are you. Our only difference is you are titled and I am not. To you, I am merely someone you view as a problem for unknowingly marrying the prince. That is not a suggestion for you to act towards me with disrespect.”

“Why you—!”

The king held up a hand. The noble stopped his oncoming tirade, face looking rather red and angry. The king, however, remained silent. He only watched you with his steely eyes.

You swallowed but held your resolve. Nobility or not, he had insulted you. No self-respecting person would let the disrespect continue. You knew you were kind but even with your kindness, you would not allow yourself to be thus treated all for the sake of being good to them.

You turned to the king. You took a deep, steadying breath before you pressed on with your cause. You kept your tone level. You had angered the Grand Duke. It would not do well for you to anger the king too.

“If I may, Your Majesty, but might I suggest you ask your son on this matter as well? The prince and I did not have the opportunity to consummate the union. We may have been married for twenty years but we only know of each other for nearly three weeks of it. We have not spent much time in one another’s company because I do not wish to invoke more of the ire from you or the Grand Duke.”

The king kept his eyes on you. Your stomach rolled at the intensity of his gaze. Then he did the unimaginable and nodded at you, seemingly to agree with your plea.

“Very well,” was all he said.

And it was not what the Grand Duke wanted.

“Your Majesty! Are you going to take the word of a-a--country girl over that of an esteemed physician?” he asked, incredulous.

“I have no reason to doubt her, Grand Duke. She has been honest with us.” The king said. His tone was hard and commanding, the very tone of a king. He turned his eyes to you. “But know this, child. If the magistrate requires the word of a physician, you shall be subjected to an examination for further proof.”

You had no choice but to nod. It seemed fair for the king to heed your words first before having a physician examine your… chastity.

“Yes, Your Majesty.” You promised.

“Very good.” The king nodded. He turned to his adviser, nodding at him. “You may go and fill the papers of the information, Grand Duke. You may send them to the magistrate when you are done.”

The Grand Duke, still red in the face, started to argue. “But, Your Majesty—”

“Do as I say, Grand Duke. We are not to waste time.”

The nobleman nodded stiffly and bowed. “Your Majesty,” he said stiffly. When he turned to go, his eyes caught yours, and in them was contempt for everything you had said.

You stepped aside to let him pass but he grabbed your arm as he did so. He yanked you to him, drawing a surprised gasp from you, and sneered.

“Do not disrespect me again, girl. You are lucky the king is in a forgiving mood. I, however, am not.” He tightened the grip on your arm, eliciting a small cry of pain from you. “Tread lightly. Cross me once more and it will be your last.” He dropped your arm before going away.

You felt the imprints of his hand on your silk-clad arm and you winced at how he had squeezed it in his anger. You straightened and turned to the monarch. He had returned behind his desk and appeared to be unaware of the brief but brutal exchange you had with the Grand Duke before he left.

“There is another thing I must ask of you,” he said from his seat.

You waited for the king. You pressed your hands further in your skirts, tangling them with the cloth, feeling your nerves shake in anxiety. Was he to send you to the gallows for standing for yourself against his adviser before him? There had never been a time that you demanded for respect from any of the nobles because you had been awarded of that the moment you entered their kingdoms. You had been treated unfairly by that man and you would not stand for it any longer.

“The Duke of Granville is sent away on business and he has taken his sisters with him. The Princess Chelina would need to be kept occupied while the duke is out and with my son resuming his training.”

You only bobbed your head in agreement, unsure of what it was the king was asking of you. You were still reeling from all that had transpired before.

“I would like for you to keep her company. She is to visit the square today but there is no one to take her. I gather you would be available for it since you are unoccupied in your time.”

“Of course, Your Majesty.” You said quietly.

“Very good,” he said again. “You are to leave when she is ready.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“That is all.”

You curtsied, hearing the roaring in your ears as the king sent you on your way. The king was kind to not mind your outburst, although his adviser had been rather too affected of your demand. It was not in you to antagonize anyone but the nobleman had been quite against you since your arrival. Had the king not been present, you were sure the Grand Duke would have blatantly insulted your very being or perhaps would even have taken the liberties to send you to the dungeons for your disrespect. That man was horrid in every way possible. Hopefully his niece was not the same.

The carriage was waiting for you and the princess when you had exited the Great Study. There had been not enough time to change into your walking apparel so instead, you only took your pouch of your allowance with you and made your way towards the awaiting coach. The Princess Chelina had arrived a few minutes after, looking every bit put together and poised like the royalty she was.

You and she had not interacted outside of formalities and brief exchanges about the weather. She was your opposite; she would rather be confined inside the palace than be out in the gardens, she preferred music and you chose books, and she was reserved while you were quite open. While there had been this great a difference, her actions towards you did not tell you that she viewed you an enemy, unlike her uncle. Rather, she was friendly and kind. Still, you were wary of her because she was his kin.

The carriage ride had been silent. You had waited for her to start a conversation, but she seemed to be contented in watching the land. When you had arrived at the town square, Princess Chelina was indifferent to the place. You had asked her of her opinion of it and she only muttered: “quaint and charming.”

“Tell me of yourself, Miss Y/N,” the Princess Chelina urged as you both walked down the streets of the town square.

You looked up at the princess and gave her a polite smile. “There is nothing for me to tell. I am but the daughter of one of this kingdom’s diplomats, Your Royal Highness.”

“How did you come to be a guest of the king?” she asked.

You greeted the merchants that you had met on your trip before. “There are some… foreign matters that the king wishes to discuss with me.”

“You are knowledgeable in them?”

“Only to a certain extent,” you replied. You smiled at a passing merchant who tipped his hat to greet you.

“Miss!” The apple merchant waved when he saw you.

You looked at the man and beamed. “Good day, sir!” You led the princess to his humble stall, stopping before the man who looked proud of his products.

“I do hope the apples were to you liking.” he said. “My trees had produced more apples today. I had thought of you when I had harvested, miss.”

“That is very kind, sir. Yes, the apples were to my liking. They were sweet and delicious.” You told him.

The merchant held out a shiny red apple to you. “Had I known you were arriving today, I would have saved the best for you, miss.”

“Then you would not have sold any apples at all, for they are all delicious,” you said with a smile. You took the apple from him and gave him a small bow of your head. “I thank you, kind sir. I hope you do not find it offending if I give this apple to the princess.”

It was only then when the man saw the Princess Chelina beside you. He was flustered, bowing with a flair at her.

“Your Royal Highness. Forgive me for not addressing you,” the man said.

You looked over to the princess, finding her looking at the man passively. There was an air of indifference to her, as how you often saw her whenever she addressed the staff of the palace or anyone not royal except you.

The man stood to his full height. “Might I offer you a basket of my finest apples, Your Royal Highness, as my apology?”

Princess Chelina only nodded.

You held out the apple for her to take. “They are the sweetest in the kingdom, Your Royal Highness. I find they cannot compare to the apples grown in Castile.”

“Such high praises, Miss Y/N,” she told you and took the fruit. “You know of my neighbor kingdom?”

“I had lived in Castile for quite some time. My father especially loved it there because of the sun and the people.” You pulled out your pouch and counted your coins.

“¿Entonces debes saber hablar castellano?” she asked you suddenly. (So you must know how to speak Castilan?)

“Muy bien, lo confieso. No habria podido hablar con los ciudadanos si solo hablar una lengua.” you replied as you looked up. “Aunque no hable bien Aragonés. No he tenido el placer de visitar Zaragoza.” (Very well, I confess. I would not have been able to speak to the citizens if I only spoke one language. Although I don’t speak Aragonese well. I have not had the pleasure of visiting Zaragoza.)

The princess only hummed at you. The merchant handed to you a basket of his apples with a proud look upon his face.

“Oh, and Miss!” He handed you another apple. “For you.”

You passed the basket to one of the guards and smiled as you took the apple from the merchant’s hands. “Thank you, sir.”

“You are most welcome, Miss.”

“Before I forget, had there been other nobles who had visited your humble stall? I have told my friends of your apples. I hoped I had convinced them enough to sample your products.” you told the man.

“There had been quite a few of them from the week last. Fear not, miss, for I gave them all the best my trees had had to offer.” He beamed proudly.

“You are most kind, sir.” You passed him coins for his basket.

He shook his head vehemently at the sight of the coins in your hands. “Oh. It is a gift for the princess.”

“I again do not want you to miss on a sale. Take it, sir, if not for yourself, then you may pass it on to someone who may be in need of it.”

The man seemed to consider your words before he took your payment. “You are gracious, miss. Thank you.”

You watched as he pocketed the coins you handed to him. The merchant bid you both a farewell and bowed before you ambled on.

“You are friends with the man?” the princess asked as you moved to another stall.

“An acquaintance. We had only met when the prince brought me with him to the square a few weeks past.” You replied.

“You speak with them quite liberally.”

“I am a commoner myself, Your Royal Highness. I am no different than they.”

“And yet you are friends with nobles?”

“It is a consequence of my father being an emissary to their countries.”

“I find it unusual that you be friends with them. In Zaragoza, we keep a strict distinction between classes.”

You nodded, knowing the same was done in Castille as well. “The nobles had initiated the friendship. Who was I to refuse such generous offer?”

The princess seemed to consider your rhetoric before nodding. “If you do not mind me asking, how come you are not yet married?”

You had anticipated such question from her, with you being six and twenty and still unmarried. At least, unmarried in their eyes. “There had been no offers,” you told her as you looked at her.

“No offers?” She raised a brow. “What of the Duke of Granville? He seems a prospect for you.”

You noted the way her tone rose when she mentioned Louis. There was an unusual curiosity about her voice, something that reminded you of the way Louis had talked about her many nights ago.

“His Grace has his heart set out for another,” you told her.

You noted the small smile in her face. You thought of the times Louis had spoken passionately about the way Princess Chelina’s face showed her true emotions. If what you saw on her face was the same as that in Louis’s, then it would be safe to assume that they harbor feelings for each other. Oh, how excited you were to tell your dearest friend!

“But he adores you.” she said gently, confusedly.

You smiled softly. “And I, him.”

“It shall be a social advantage for you to marry the duke.”

Not as big a social advantage as being married to the prince, you thought to yourself. “I am aware of that but I would not want to burden him with the likes of me.”

“You and he are quite alike.”

“It was how our friendship was born.” You smiled. “Perhaps it was why he had not returned my affections. We are too alike that he thinks me a sister.”

“Who does his heart long for, then? Perhaps he has shared with you.” The princess seemed very eager to know of the answer.

Pursing your lips, you considered telling the truth of Louis’s feelings and affections but decided against it. She was to marry Kit. She was to broker an alliance, a partnership, with her kingdom and his. Telling her would only jeopardize what everyone had worked so hard for.

“He has not told me,” you fibbed. “But I am quite sure it is not I.”

You walked on with her, approaching some of your acquaintances. You had introduced to them the princess and they all bowed and curtsied before her. Princess Chelina only responded in her aloof way, thinking them more subjects than friends. You found no fault in that; it was the Zaragozan way, after all.

“Tell me about Prince Kit,” she urged as you entered one of the shops.

Your hand stilled from taking a lovely gemstone brooch from its silk nestling. You swallowed thickly. “Me? I feel I am not the right person to answer your request.”

“I heard you had been with him to the square. I would hazard a guess and say you had spent time with him well before my arrival.”

You looked at the princess, searched her face for any sign of offense or resentment but found none. In her face, you only saw curiosity—the same curiosity she had when she asked of Louis and his heart.

Still, you refused to give any indication that you had known much more than she does.

“I do not know the prince well.” You said instead, choosing your words carefully. “I believe that whatever he has told you, he has told me the same.”

Princess Chelina picked the very brooch you were to take and held it against your dress. “And yet he looks at me differently than he does with you.”

“He looks at you with utmost respect, Your Royal Highness.”

“And you, with affection.”

You stilled. Even your lungs stopped in their function. You had been careful since that night, avoiding Kit whenever you were out of your room. When you heard his voice or his steps, you made sure you were away from him before he could even find you. You could not bring yourself to face him lest you see the similar heart break in his eyes.

“Your Royal Highness—”

“I may not know Prince Kit but I know of it when someone’s heart has been taken.” She put the brooch down and walked to another display. “And in his eyes, I can see he is taken with you.”

“I think you are mistaken—”

Princess Chelina turned to you, an amused smile on her lips. “I am not blind nor am I stupid, Miss Y/N. I had seen how he looked at you during the feast, or the way he danced with you.”

“I did not mean to imply that you are stupid—”

“Then you agree with my assessment? That he is taken with you?”

You caught a glimpse of the shopkeeper, who nodded in understanding. “Your Royal Highness, this is hardly the place for a conversation such as this.”

The shopkeeper bowed and headed to the back of the shop, leaving the two of you.

“I know you are aware that it is only a marriage of convenience for me and the prince. This kingdom needs our alliance. There is no affection between us but I must know if there is something between the two of you.”

Although the princess’s demeanor towards you was quite friendly, you were still wary of the fact that she and the Grand Duke are related. If you told her of any semblance of your feeling towards Kit, you knew they would find some use of it against you.

You clasped your hands before you and played with your fingers. “Your Royal Highness may ask a question that I wish to not answer,” you said, remembering the words your father had used once during his meetings. “I find that this is one of those moments where I will exercise that right.”

Princess Chelina raised a brow at you before nodding. “Very well. I shall have to pry the answer from the prince, then.” She turned from you to look over at the displays once more.

You blew a sigh, wiping your sweaty hands on your skirt. For the kingdom, Y/N. Think of the kingdom, you chanted to yourself.

You interacted with more of the merchants, asking of their wares and what made them special. It served educational for both you and the princess because you had not known such products existed in your kingdom. You were surprised to learn that the precious blue stone and gold metals that were sold in the square had been mined within the kingdom.

Apparently, the precious stones had been discovered fairly recently—nearly two years ago—and there had been interested parties who wanted the mines. There were talks of the futures of the mines but none of them fell through because the queen had passed and the king fell into a great depression. However, it had been sanctioned by the king that the jewels only be kept within the kingdom’s borders. Should anyone be caught bringing them out or overseas with intention of selling, they would be charged with theft. The punishment seemed quite hefty but it also was fitting, seeing as the stones only existed in the kingdom.

As her thanks for taking up much of the seller’s time, Princess Chelina bought bracelets for the both of you, yours a shade of blue like Kit’s eyes while hers was a deep red. You thanked the princess and wore your bracelet proudly on your wrist.

You had enjoyed your newfound friendship with the princess but you were still reserved whenever you replied to her questions about Kit. She had become less interested in the prince when your topic suddenly returned on to the Duke of Granville. You hoped that when you return from the trip, Louis would be there for you tell of what you had found out about the princess’s feelings.

You walked down the street that held all of the kingdom’s seamstresses’ workshop, hoping to show her the fashion of the kingdom. It had been quite a while since you had started on your trip when the princess said that she was feeling faint from the heat of the sun.

“It is time we return to the palace, Your Royal Highness,” you said as you fanned her.

“I shall return. I see you had been having an exceptional time with the people. I would so loathe to make you leave when you are having fun.” She pressed her fingers to her temple.

“I would not want for you to return alone—”

“The guards shall come with me. I will be safe in returning to the palace. I shall have them bring back a carriage for you,” she insisted.

“Your Royal Highness—”

“I shall tell my uncle that I insisted on my return alone, if that is what you are worried about.” She took a guard’s proffered arm. “Thank you for keeping me company, Miss Y/N. I apologize for it to be cut short.”

You would have insisted that you left with her. She had all but commanded that you stay in the square and enjoy the rest of the trip. You were helpless in stating your cause because the princess had already gone back to the direction of the carriage. You only watched as it rolled away back to the palace. None of the guards had remained with you. You were left alone to wait for the arrival of another carriage for you.

You decided to make the best of your trip by meeting more of your acquaintances. The flower merchant’s stall perfumed the rest of the street with her blooms. She gifted you once more with lavenders, remembering that the prince had done so when he was with you. You hid the pain that accompanied the memory. Almost everything connected with Kit. In your heart, you knew it would be difficult to forget him when you were to leave.

You were about to head to one of the seamstress’ shops when you noticed a horse’s saddle bearing the insignia of the kingdom waiting without its rider. You walked to it, wondering why there was only one horse instead of a carriage for you, when you saw who the rider was.

The Grand Duke emerged from one of the shops, looking around the square as he neared his horse.

You turned away abruptly, not wanting to be seen by the horrible man. Your heart lodged in your throat, hearing it thud in your ears at the thought of interacting with him so soon after threatening you. You kept yourself occupied, handling the products of the store nearest to you absentmindedly, peering from the side of your eye to see if he had left.

Instead, you saw him looking rather suspicious with the way he crammed his parchment bag inside his horse’s satchel. You slowly turned your head to his direction, keeping your eyes cast down but just enough to see what the noble was doing. His body was turned towards his horse, still placing his purchase inside his satchel.

You carefully raised your eyes, locking with his for a second. You brought a hand to cover the side of your face, pretending to tuck in your hair as you turned away. You felt sick with fear at the thought of his threats.

You did not know if the pounding you heard was from your heart or the Grand Duke’s horse galloping away. It took you a while before you could steady your heartbeat and when you had, you searched for the place for any traces of him.

When you did not see him, you craned your neck to find which shop he had emerged from. The Apothecary, you read.

Why would the Grand Duke be at the only apothecary when the Magistrate was at the opposite side of the square? What would he need to go here for if the royal physician was readily available to treat the palace guests for any ailments?

The small hairs on your nape rose on their ends when you realized what the place was for. Apothecaries dried herbs and plants and prepared them for any needs of the people. If the apothecary sold the very same preparation of plant parts you saw mixed in with the tea leaves, then it could be that this was the place where it was bought from . And if the Grand Duke was here… If the parchment bag he was holding contained any of those plants…

It would mean that he had a hand in putting them in the Queen’s blend of tea.

No, you tried denying to yourself but even you knew it was a possibility.

You kept your growing suspicion of the late queen’s death to yourself, writing your findings in your journal with your lemon juice ink. You knew there was something amiss when Kit said his mother loved her gardens. She would not have purposefully placed the poisonous plants in her tea blend because she was knowledgeable of them.

You cursed yourself for your curiosity, in wanting to know the answers to every question that plagued you. You had told yourself earlier the day that you were to not read up on more of the plants and herbs, that you were to stop your investigation. But it was no ordinary person’s death you were looking into. It was the Queen’s and you did not think it was accidental. You believed she was deliberately killed. You owed Kit and his father the truth.

Straightening your back and making sure the Grand Duke had left, you headed for the apothecary. A bell rang as you entered the threshold of the medical shop and behind the counter stood the chemist. He was a wizened old man but despite his advanced age, he was still agile in mixing whatever it was in his mortar.

“Good day, Miss. How may I be of assistance to you?” He had put down his pestle and had watched you with a friendly face.

“Good day, sir.”

You looked around his shop, finding bundles of herbs tied up for drying and bottles of different concoctions on the shelves. There was a jar of dried Digitalis purpurea leaves and petals. Your breath caught in your throat once more as you realized the preparation was the same.

“May I help you, Miss? Is there a particular potion or medication you need?”

Your eyes turned on the man again. As you did, your eyes passed his opened ledger. You knew that almost every shop kept a record of their sales. It would be no wonder for the chemist to keep one as well, especially since he sold medicine and poison. The Grand Duke’s name would be there if he had been a customer of the shop.

You had to see the ledger for what the Grand Duke had bought, instead of asking the man directly. The question was how to do it without arousing suspicion.

“Miss?”

“Forgive me,” you said, politely smiling at the chemist. “I seem to have forgotten what I was here for. Would you mind if I were to have a look around so I may remember why?”

“Of course, miss. Should you need any assistance, you may call my attention.”

“Thank you, sir.” You smiled politely and walked to the herbs you had seen.

Perhaps, if you asked the man to prepare you something that was not readily available, he would go to the back of the shop to gather his ingredients. That would have given you enough time to search for the Grand Duke’s name—

You stopped as you saw the glass jar that held a preparation of Aconitum napellus. Each book of Queen Amalie’s had said that it would be near impossible to mistake it for something else. Surely, the late queen would not have added those deadly petals and leaves with her tea. She likely had not even dried them at all. It would only take a skilled chemist to prepare them properly without feeling the numbing effects of the roots. With it mixed in, there was no doubt it was done deliberately by someone who had prior knowledge of the dangers of said plant and someone with malicious intent as well.

You heard the chemist put down his tools and looked to see him head towards the back of his shop. You rushed to the counter. You pulled the ledger to you, scanned the opened page for the name of the Grand Duke and finding it as the last entry. Only, he had not bought any preparations of Digitalis purpurea or Aconitum napellus.

Instead, he bought hemlock. Hemlock. The most dangerous of all plants.

What was the Grand Duke’s purpose to buy hemlock? you wondered. He was growing more and more suspicious to you.

You flipped through the ledger, scanning the pages for more entries with his name and opened to it when you found one. It was a record of his purchase of the service of the chemist. It was done a few weeks prior to the queen’s death.

Service. What kind of service did the Grand Duke require of the apothecary?

You lifted the pages back to the day’s date but not before finding another entry of his name and a purchase of dried Digitalis purpurea. It had been dated just a few months before your arrival to the palace.

Hemlock and Digitalis purpurea. Those did not seem to be any ordinary medication that the Grand Duke would need. Most especially hemlock since there had been no therapeutic use for it.

You had read that hemlock was used for putting down animals. You knew the Grand Duke had no pets that he would need hemlock for. You shivered as coldness settled on you. What other purpose was there for the noble to buy hemlock other than to use it to eradicate someone?

And to whom would he use the poison if not for the one that irked him the most? You. Especially now that you had talked back at him in front of the king.

Shuffling of feet came from the back of the shop. You pushed the ledger back in its original place when the man returned.

“Sir, is there an antidote to hemlock poisoning?” you asked, moving away from his worktable. You felt the ice in your veins from your harsh realization that the duke may have intentions to poison you for crossing him.

The man looked up at you. “How long has passed since they had ingested the poison?”

You rubbed your hands on your arms, staving off the internal chill. “I would not know, sir. Perhaps a few hours,” you lied.

“An antidote would not work, miss. Had you come in within the hour of ingestion, I would have given you an emetic of zinc for them to take. Or they may give them mustard and castor oil.”

You nodded. “Is that all they need as remedy?”

“You must also keep them warm, miss. I hope they had done that before they sent you for an antidote.”

“What happens if they did not keep the body warm?”

“Then we pray for them. There is nothing more we can do.”

You kept quiet, remembering the information the chemist had said. First, keep the body warm. Then administer an emetic of zinc or mustard and castor oil. And if those do not work, pray. You hoped against hope that you would not turn cold before you realize you had been poisoned with hemlock.

“Sir, may I buy the emetic?” you asked almost desperately. You would rather you prepare for your untimely demise. You very well knew you could not tell anyone of your suspicion of the Grand Duke trying to poison you. At least, not until you have gathered enough evidence against him. But even then, it would be your word against his. And judging from what had transpired earlier today at the Great Study, you knew they would much rather believe the noble than their accidental princess.

“Of course, miss.”

“If I may ask another question, good sir,” you said when the man had started mixing the antidote for you. “How do I counteract the effects of Digitalis purpurea?”

The man looked up at you, eyebrow raised at your question. “Dear me, Miss. How many poisoned people have you been around?”

You gave a sad smile at his incredulity. “Too many, I’m afraid.”

He harrumphed and said, “Nightshade should counteract the action of foxglove.”

“Is that not poisonous as well?”

“Yes. Foxglove—that is, Digitalis purpurea—slows the beat of the heart. Nightshade—Atropa belladonna—increases it. Given the right dosage of nightshade, it shall bring the heart back to its normal rhythm. Too much of it may kill as well.”

You nodded. “May I ask for that as well?”

“As you wish, miss.” He smiled gently at you. “I would not want to presume, but should you ask, I fear there is no remedy for monkshood, for Aconitum napellus.”

You turned to him, a brow raised. “I was—”

“They are common plants, miss. Foxglove and nightshade are easily mistaken for another crop or flower, although not monkshood. I find that to be quite easy to differentiate from the other two but those three are all poisons still. If you are knowledgeable of their appearance, it would do well for you to remove them now. They kill rather quick and often you would not have time to give them the antidote.”

You nodded, thinking that it was another thing for you to do as you brought this upon yourself for your inquisitiveness. “Of course, sir. Thank you for your advice.”

You waited as the chemist prepared the antidotes for you. As you did, you recounted the information you had: the Grand Duke spoke German, he had gifted the queen books to read and flowers to plant, his name had been recorded in the apothecary’s ledger, and he had purchased foxglove and hemlock and whatever service the apothecary offered. You dared not be suspicious but all of the coincidences could not be accidental. The chance of them all being connected was too high to be ignored.

“Here you are, miss. Your emetic and a vial of nightshade.” The chemist said as he passed the vials to you.

“Forgive me for asking questions, sir, but there is one more I wish to know.” You gave your payment for his products as you took the vials from him, holding them close to you.

“Of course, miss. What shall it be?”

“What services do you offer, Sir? Do you only prepare antidotes?”

“I also prepare plants and herbs to my customer’s preference, miss. You could say I am but a physician’s cook.”

“I see. If I were to bring a bundle of lavenders that I wish for you to prepare, would you do that, sir?”

The man nodded. “I would offer my wares first and if they were not to your liking, I would do your herbs as how you wish them done. I could dry them to your preference.”

You nodded and smiled politely despite feeling incredibly frightened at the new things you have learned. “Thank you, Sir. I am truly grateful for your help.”

He bowed to you with a smile. “You are welcome, miss. If I dare say so, be wary of the people around you. It is rather suspicious that you be surrounded by people being poisoned.”

You nodded. “I shall, sir. Good day.”

You left the apothecary. Your hands shook from how tight you gripped the vials. You had learned plenty in so little a time that everything you knew became muddled in your head. You took calming breaths, counting to ten until your mind had cleared.

Almost all of the clues you had gathered connected back to the Grand Duke. Surely, he would not do it himself. He seemed to be the man who would not dirty his hands but would rather have someone else do it for him. Yes, that seemed most plausible.

What if the Grand Duke had given the prepared poison to a maid and had told them it was from the queen? you wondered. With the housekeeper not knowledgeable of the tea leaves, you suspected the maids were not as well. They would have been easily swayed by the noble since he held power over the household as the king’s adviser.

You recalled the housekeeper saying she had been meaning to throw the specific blend of tea. She was not able to because a former maid had changed the containers without labelling them. Why would a maid do such a thing, especially since the teas had been a blend and not just their own leaves?

Perhaps because she was employed by the Grand Duke to do that.

You shivered despite the heat of the afternoon sun. The nobleman was more than suspicious. He was beginning to be the prime suspect. With the dangerous herbs, he had means of killing her. And if he had a maid do his bidding, then he had the chance to do so. But why?

Why would the Grand Duke kill the Queen Amalie?

You took another deep breath, clearing your head as you did so. In the square, you were safe. The Grand Duke had left. You had your antidotes close to you. It was best to take the apothecary’s advice: that you were not to take anything that would be offered by the nobleman and his niece.

TAP Taglist

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[tinyboxxtink]

“The Man Of Your Dreams”

Y’all. Y’ALL. 

I was gonna make this a series but then I was like “Aw nah I can wrap it up neatly in one go”.

And that “one go” took 3 and 1/2 hours and 10 pages!!!!!!!! (on GoogleDocs anyway...) 

I went with my “keep dreaming about a man and then you go off to find him” idea.

The dating app one might be for a longer series, idk yet.

But this, this is my baby.

Like I said, I had this dream. Specifically the first and last scene. And ya’ll while I wrote the crescendo, I played Tyler Blackburn’s “Can’t Love Me.” Specifically starting at 2:11. I highly recommend playing it as you read from:

“Until out of nowhere--“Y/N???””

But that’s just me. I replayed that scene with the music about a thousand times in my head, I won’t lie to you.

I hope you love this as much as I do!!

Tag List

@wanniiieeee

@dumauier

@word-scribbless

@objection-argumentative

@chasingeverybreakingwave

------

“Oh no it’s happening again.”

“What?! No not now,”

“Yeah I feel it, the pulling,”

“Dammit! No no no…” He grabbed you on both of your sides and pulled you into his chest as tightly as he could, but you knew it wouldn’t help; You were fading, and the last words you hear were:

“I will find you!!” 

----------------

Suddenly, you woke up in your bed in a cold sweat. 

“Dammit...not again,” You shook your head. “No, no no no NO!!!!” You let yourself have a moment of breakdown, before immediately grabbing the pencil and giant pad of paper from under your bed. You had to get it down before it faded, again. The face, HIS face. You furiously filled in the lines on his face you had missed before, and you finally got the dimples on his mouth right. However, it was the eyes that drove you most insane.

Half filled in while the rest of his face was taking shape, his eyes were the one thing you could never quite get. Not that you hadn’t seen them enough, you had been having dreams about this man for over a month straight now. Every night, the same man. But it didn’t feel like dreaming, not in the slightest. It felt very much like being awake in this world, everything was so real.

He was so real.

And so, after a week of these “episodes”, you decided to yourself that this couldn’t be a coincidence, that it was NOT a mix of your subconscious making up scenarios in your head, it was real. This man existed somewhere, and you were going to find him. 

However the question of “How” was still very annoyingly present. Sure you and this man had talked about everything, seriously EVERYTHING. Likes, dislikes, career, life stories--- well, at least you were pretty sure you had.

 Some conversations in your dream world were completely crystal clear in your mind-- 

When he was six and all he wanted was a red bike, and come Christmas morning it wasn’t there. He had stormed around his mom’s apartment having a total temper tantrum until his abuelita asked him to check if she had left her keys out in the hall from last minute shopping. He opened the door to reveal a brand new, shiny red 10 speed bike propped against their doorway.

“We lived on the 10th floor, with no elevator. My mom and abuelita carried that thing up 10 flights of stairs just so I’d have a happy Christmas morning,” He had told you with tears in his eyes.

And then others, containing any real information about where to find him, were a blur. Specific details like his name, his job, even where he currently lived-- they sounded like garbled nonsense when you tried to recall them.

The Universe is a sadistic bastard.

But that conversation about the bike-- it was so specific and so detailed that there was no way your mind could have made it up. No way. But all you knew was that at some point in his childhood he lived with his mom and abuela in a 10th story apartment somewhere in New York City. That’s it. 

And one more thing that you couldn’t shake-- his touch. 

There had been a dream where he had asked to kiss you, to which you happily agreed. He had pulled you close into his arms, his hands ran through your hair as he pressed his lips against yours. And every dream since then, you two were always either holding hands or holding each other, or touching in any capacity-- as if you were both trying to memorize what it felt like.

Of course this still being “a dream”, a lot of the times your “dates” with this man were just playing out themselves, and you were blissfully unaware that they were even dreams. So you’d never think of asking “real” questions like where to meet or something. Only those few moments before you would wake would you realize “Oh that’s right, this isn’t real.” And by then it was too late.

But today was the day. You were sure of it. You had finally finished your drawing of your “dream man”, apart from the filled in eyes. Only an eyeline shaped hole rested in the middle of his perfect face. 

“Okay, that is just horrifying” You heard your roommate’s voice behind you.

“What? It’s perfect, Shi!” You defended your drawing. 

Sure you had hesitated telling your best friend of 10 years about your “situation”, but once you decided that you were going to find him, you knew you’d need her help. And so, after a very long conversation over a LOT of drinks, you had convinced her to help you. Well, reluctantly help you. 

“Well it’ll be no problem trying to find a guy with NO EYES,” She giggled.

“Shut up, I just...I can’t get them right,” 

“Can’t get them right? Girl have you or have you not told me that you have studied that man’s face EVERY night for the past 6 weeks?” 

“Yeah but….they’re so...perfect,” You sighed-- the gaping eye hole was mocking you. It was like the Universe saying “Good luck finding him without THESE!!!!” 

But you knew, you just knew in your heart of hearts that if you saw his eyes in real life, you’d know. You’d know instantly. You had this-- look, between you. The way he looked at you, the love and passion in his beautiful green eyes.

You couldn’t draw that on paper.

“Well just how do you expect us to make a “missed connection” flier with a demon looking guy like that?” 

“Look Shiloh, it’s a start ok?” 

“It’s not! You need those eyes, eyes are the most distinguishing trait on a person’s face!” She shook the paper at you.

“I know that!!!” you scoffed.

“Alright well...just, try again tonight yeah?” She put a hand on your shoulder.

“Yeah alright,”

----

The next night you did all the nightly rituals you had read and researched up on how to “lucid dream”. Eating certain foods, meditating before bed, repeating mantras as you fell asleep-- sometimes they helped you take control of the dreams, sometimes not.

But this has never happened.

-----------

You were suddenly “awake”, in a park. Wait, this wasn’t just some generic “Dream” park. You knew this park. You immediately started scanning the sights around you-- kids playing and running around, people talking on a fountain-- The fountain. You knew that fountain. Your eyes darted quicker around the scenic picture for a statute, and there it was.

This was Central Park. And not just Central Park, a very specific part of Central Park that you passed most days on your way to work. Could this just be the “coincidence” normal dream stuff seeping in? Just images of your day being played out in your REM cycle? I mean he wasn’t even--

“Dream girl,” His voice came from behind you. 

You spun to face the fountain and saw him in an off white cream colored suit, with a pink tie. His hair was in a coif, and for the first time maybe ever, you noticed him carrying a briefcase. 

“Hey you,” You smiled, pulling him into a long, deep kiss. 

“So, Central Park today huh? You know you could’ve told me that beforehand I wouldn’t have paid an Uber to drive --- blocks.” You noticed the blurb in his number. Wait, wait this wasn’t happening.

“Wait, what?” You were suddenly “awake” .

“My office? It’s just about ---- blocks that way,” He pointed forward-- South. 

His office was south from Central Park, only a few blocks away. Within walking distance.

“What else?” You grabbed him.

“What else? Baby are you ok…?” He backed up one step in concern.

“Dammit, snap out of it abogado!!!” You snapped at him, leaving you both in shock-- but for two different reasons. 

He was suddenly “awake” in this world too, but you had just called him a name in spanish that you did not know the meaning of.

“Since when do you know spanish?” He asked.

“It’s spanish? QUICK tell me what it means!!!” You shook him.

“Abogado means--” 

-----------

And he was gone. It was gone. You had been pulled suddenly from your dream world, something that had never happened before. It wasn’t even morning yet, the sun was barely peeking out from the skyline. You had never gotten that close to getting details from him, NEVER.

Maybe the Universe was catching on. 

You grabbed your phone from the charger beside you and furiously typed “Abogado” into google translate. And there it was, in black and white:

Lawyer.

This guy was a lawyer, who worked a few blocks south of Central Park. If he was real. You sighed to yourself as you put your phone down and went back to sleep.

-----------------------------

And you were in the park again. 

“Hey, there you are! Where’d you go?” the “abogado” asked you with his dreamy smile. Wait, was he “asleep” again? And why did you pick up here? He knew you were gone? WAS THIS PLACE REAL?

“ABOGADO,” You shouted at him like a crazy person.

“...You don’t know spanish, why do you know-- Oh my god,” The man was suddenly cognizant of everything.

“Baby! Aw, baby girl I’ve missed you..” He pulled you into a kiss. You let him for a second, then pulled away quickly.

“Look, I don’t know what’s happening but this--” You gestured around the park. “This is near where I live. In reality,” 

His eyes widened as he recognized where you were. “This is a few blocks from my office-- in reality,” 

“Really? Really.” You were becoming frantic.

“I mean, if this is at all real, and you’re real--” He began looking around the park.

“I’M real, are YOU real?” You couldn’t believe he was questioning YOUR existence.

“I think the fact that we’re both questioning each other’s existence, might be either brain death or some kind of reality where we both do indeed exist,” He smirked.

“God you’re smart, why did I not know this before?”

“...I don’t know, we don’t really get into details usually, do we?” 

“No but now-- oh my god, NOW,” You grabbed him again excitedly.

“Now what? Oh, I love that guy’s suit…” He peered over your shoulder.

“Rafael will you FOCUS?” You both stopped and stared at each other as soon as the name left your lips.

“...I-I’m sorry, what?” He was turning pale

“Rafael...w-why did I just call you Rafael?”

“....Rafael’s my name,” He stared at you in disbelief. He actually looked shocked that you knew his name. 

“Y/N,” He finally spoke.

“Y/N is my name!!!!” You squealed. “This is happening, this is happening Rafael!!!!” You grabbed him in a hug but he still stood there in a daze.

“Oh god are you fading?” 

“N-No, I just...you have a name,” 

“...I..yeah?” You scrunch your nose. “Did...do...do you not think I’m real?” 

“No!” He shook his head. “I mean I do think you’re real, I just...this...this hasn’t happened before,” He stroked your cheek with his thumb, staring at it while he did it. Like he was memorizing the feeling of his skin on yours.

“I know, this is the most detailed “episode” we’ve ever had,” You pressed his hand harder against your cheek, memorizing the feeling of his hands over yours. 

“Tomorrow,” He stopped stroking your face and looked at you very seriously. 

“What?” 

“I-I feel it, I’m waking up-- damn early court time,” He grumbled. “But tomorrow-- er, today,” He grabbed both of your hands and squeezed them as hard as he could.

“If we are both real, we’ll meet here at this exact spot at 3:30 today, yeah?” You could see his body slowly disintegrating in front of you like Peter Parker at the end of Infinity War.

All you could do was nod as you felt yourself waking up, but you gave everything you had to grab him in one last kiss….

-------------

BEEP BEEP BEEEP!!!!!!

Your alarm was yelling at you, but you were already wide awake. Today was the day. Today at 3:30, in Central Park, you were going to meet your dream man.

If he was real. 

-------

The minutes passed by like hours, he would pick the day you have off so you could just sit there and stare at your phone obsessively all day. Of course after you had taken at least 2 hours to make sure you looked absolutely perfect for your man. 

You wanted to look like his dream girl. 

Finally, it was 3:20. Shiloh had come home early to walk with you to the park, there was no way she was missing this. You wanted enough time to make sure you’d be there exactly at 3:30, not a minute after. You held hands with Shi as you entered the park’s gates and just a few yards away was the fountain area you had been in last night. 

“So...this is it,” Shiloh dropped your hands.

“I know....What time is it?” You shuddered with excitement.

“3:29-- you know maybe he’s not a stickler for time like you and needs to be obsessively early everywhere babe,” 

“He’s a lawyer, they’re usually pretty punctual,” You raised an eyebrow. “Plus, if he’s as excited as I am he will be here on time,” You were bouncing on your heels like a little girl.

“Well, it’s 3:30 now…” You both began to look around the area. You had brought the drawing so Shiloh had an idea of who she was looking for, although she still deemed it impossible without his eyes.

“Y’know he said he had court today, maybe it’s further away from here,” You spoke out loud, still scanning every inch of the park. You didn’t know who you were trying to convince more, Shiloh or yourself.

Every second that passed by, your heart broke into teenier tinier pieces. You felt sick to your stomach, you were shaking-- you needed to sit. 

Shiloh came and joined you on the side of the fountain and held you in her arms as the park suddenly began filling very quickly. There was some sort of event happening soon, and people were getting “good seats”.

“Wh-What? No, no you guys can’t be here!” You frantically began circling people. “How is he supposed to find me if you’re all surrounding this damn fountain? HOW?!”

“Y/N….Honey, chill…” Shiloh tried to pull you away, but you jumped onto the fountain to get away from her as the area continued to fill with people, even police began to survey the area-- they stared at you, whispering things into their walkies. They were going to ask you to get down. They were going to ask you to leave. They were going to make you lose your chance forever--- and you couldn’t have that.

“RAFAEL!!!!!!” You started screaming into the crowd. Several members of the crowd began turning and staring at you as you repeated the name over and over again, walking around on top of the fountain as you did. 

“Are you nuts you’re going to get us arrested!!”  Shiloh hissed, pulling on your arm.

“I don’t care--- RAFAEL!!!!!” You knocked her hand away and started screaming again.

“Ma’am, you’re going to need to come with us,” A Park Ranger started for your hand but you evaded it as you continued circling and screaming like an insane person.

“NO!!! I CAN’T!!!!! HE’LL BE HERE!!!! RAFAEL!!!!!!”

-------

“I mean, are you SURE it was this end of the park, Rafa?” Olivia Benson circled the same spot her and Rafael had been walking around for several minutes now. 

“Yeah, I’m sure! There was a statue--”

“There are a LOT of statues in here, Rafa. Did you see anything else in this ‘dream’?” 

“Look Liv, I appreciate you coming with me even though you don’t believe in this at all, but the snarkiness is not helping,” He folded his arms with a scowl.

“I’m sorry, I’ll--” Olivia was cut off mid-sentence by her walkie going off. “Benson.”

“Yeah hi, this is the CP patrol-- We heard you were around here, and I think we’ve got a-- what do you call it, special victim? This girl’s running around crazy yelling for some dude, I think she might be a few circuits short of a circuit board,” 

“Where are you?”

“The South Entrance by Lootney Fountain,” As those words rang out through her walkie, Rafael’s eyes widened. 

“The fountain…” He muttered, beginning to sprint across the park. “I forgot about the fountain!!!!!!”

-------

The CP Patrol had gotten you off the fountain and were trying to calm you down, but you wouldn’t stop yelling Rafael’s name. Until out of nowhere--

“Y/N???”

You’d know that voice anywhere. You jumped out of the cop’s reach and back onto the fountain where you could see over the crowd. Your eyes frantically searched when you saw a man running towards the fountain; from across the park, and then you saw his face.

It was Rafael.

The second you locked eyes, you both just stopped moving entirely. You were pretty sure you had stopped breathing. You could see everything in those big beautiful green eyes you had the hardest time putting down on paper. You saw the same thoughts running through his head as yours:

He was real. You were real.

“Y/N!!!!!!” He finally yelled, making the crowd turn to face him. He disappeared into the sea of people as you jumped down and began tearing through them like mad. 

“RAFAEL!!!!” You screamed, knocking people over left and right. He was sprinting across the lawn, more desperate to get to you than anything in his entire life.

“Y/N!!!!!!” You heard his voice again, and this time it was so much closer. So crisp and clear, just like it was in your dreams-- But this was real. It was really happening. You gave one last push through a group of stragglers to come upon a man huffing and puffing in a cream colored suit, with a pink tie. But he seemed to lose all signs of fatigue as you hurled yourself into his arms-- his real, open arms. He spun you around and kissed you deeper and harder than he ever had in any of your encounters. 

And it was real.

You felt it even more than the most detailed of dreams, his taste, the feel of his touch, his smell. You stood there locked in a kiss for several seconds, while Olivia waved off the coppers and Shiloh had broken through the crowd to see your very real dream man.

Finally, after convincing yourself to pull away from him, you looked into his eyes. His real, green eyes. You stroked his cheek while he kept the tightest grip around your waist, as if you were going to float away if he let up one second. 

“You’re real,” You blinked back tears.

“So are you,” He held back his own tears, stroking yours away from your cheeks. 

“I love you, Rafael,” You whispered, still scared to death you’d wake up at any moment.

“I love you, YN-- my dream girl,” He smiled back, pulling you into another long kiss.

That night you had normal dreams, which you didn’t mind in the slightest; because you slept in the arms of the man of your dreams.

[piracytheorist]

The first notation says "ここからぼろ泣きします" (~aprox "here is when I really started crying") and the other > "she was crying again and I'm pretty sure she also said "I love you" - or tried to; Rose said "愛してるよ""

yeah she said "うちも愛してるよ" ("I love you too") but it got a bit understandably messy by the crying (me too Harumaki-san, me too ;_;)

"yt ALMOST got me, as the video was age restricted... but thanks to some vpn loopholes, I found a way to watch it!"

Age restriction? but you're 27? youtube wut. Is it bc of laws in Greece or something? I know there are vids that get country blocked.

About the languages, I can't remember what it said in Spanish at that point but I very much remember the Heisenberg naming his siblings "la zorra chupasangre, la muñeca psicópata y el p*to besugo" (the bloodsucking bitch, the psychopath doll, and the f*cking fish/idiot (it's a common fish, but it's also an insult like dumb/dimwit/idiot - lmao it gets across the 'moronic freak' 'Moreau-nic freak' thing ig)

-laa

the way I never got that "Moreau-nic freak" pun in the first place

WHY DOES IT HIT ME SO MUCH, TO REALIZE SHE DID SAY "I LOVE YOU TOO" AS A RESPONSE TO ROSE'S I LOVE YOU?? I had suspected it was that, and I was like YES WE LOVE ETHAN WINTERS 😭😭😭

Like legit one of the reasons I'd love to play as Rose in a future RE game is because we know she loves Ethan so much 🥺 and only because she knows what he did for her (like ik I talk a lot about the first time I watched that cutscene and how I wasn't that invested in Ethan then, but EVEN THEN I was touched by how she told him she loves him. My heart!). I feel like I'll immediately connect with her through that 😭

/

Yeah, there's this stupid thing I get into some videos where yt asks me to verify my age. Because I do happen to be 27, but yt wants proof. In what form, you ask? By asking me to show them a photo of my ID card or give them my credit card info. I have no single clue where that came from and why it exists. It's legit, it's not a scam, it's gοοgle itself asking me for that info. And I know there are multiple people who haven't done any of those yet they can still watch age-restricted videos. It's stupid and super annoying. Why does gοοgle want such private information just so I can watch gameplays of a horror game? Certain ones, specifically, because most are not age restricted! I don't know what they're smoking in gοοgle, but it's crap.

I tried using a vpn to pass through it, but I was still blocked out, so I'm pretty sure it's not because of the laws here (though I have found videos that are blocked in my country, specifically, the videos with the soundtrack from Outlander are blocked here for some stupid reason, and I can watch them with a vpn enabled). The vpn I have has an autopilot mode, which I guess makes me appear... nowhere, I guess. Like, normally, without the vpn on, my yt logo looks like this:

And if I put it on some of the few places it offers for free, I get the respective logo change:

But if I put it on autopilot...

I belong nowhere. yt doesn't know what to do with me, and it allows me to watch age restricted videos. Perhaps it thinks I'm on a Space Station and so I'm a legal adult so I am allowed to watch what I want. Idk. Really fucked up that they ask me ID or credit card info to allow me to watch "adult stuff", if you ask me, but that's how capitalism and megacorporations work.

//

And back to RE stuff, I don't know how "canon" the dubs are considered (I mean, the ones the game itself offers are official, but still), but I like looking around for any differences even in like, small things. Like in the Four Lords scene, when Ethan looks at his restrained hands and says "Don't I get a say in this?", in Italian, Spanish and I think Portuguese, he says "Isn't my opinion important?" and I may not be an official translator myself, but I do kinda wanna make unofficial Greek subs for the game (if I ever figure out how to change the game files), and in Greek I would translate that into (almost literal, because our way of putting accent on the "me" would be to kind of repeat the word at the beginning of the sentence) "Aren't you gonna ask me?" because that's how I feel someone would say that in Greek, like, a literal translation of "Don't I get a say in this" could work but it would sound a bit archaic and even too formal for the situation. In any case, with the dubs and what little I understand from them, it feels like I'm watching the same thing but from another perspective. I wish I could understand the Japanese version, I feel like it's probably the closest to what the writers intended.

[longitud-de-onda]

on my mind

pairing; javier peña x female reader summary; you’re trying to have a peaceful night in when javier brings home yet another informant, and while you brace yourself to hear the noises all night, you’re surprised to hear something else. rating; t warnings; strangling, medical inacurracies probably, some angst? idk it doesn’t feel super angsty to me but y’all’ll probably think it is word count; 2.4k requested; by anon “You are his next door neighbor and friend. At night, you often hear his escapades through the wall. One night, things sound more like a fight than sex. You aren't sure what to do. You have a key to his apartment. You sneak in to see what is going on. Javi's informant is strangling him with his tie for real. She runs away, Javi regains consciousness, & tells you that he thought he was going to die and the only thing he could think about was that he never told you he loves you.”

Javier fucking Peña. You’re gonna kill the man since this is the fifth time this week he’s brought a girl home and it’s only Wednesday and it’s 8pm and you want to relax after a long day. You can hear them coming up the stairs outside the building, the loud Spanish obscenities spilling from their lips in the hallway, the jingling of the keys as they enter his apartment.

He’s been doing it since you got to Colombia all those years ago, but it never ceases to hurt. Doesn’t he know how much noise he and all the women he has over make? Doesn’t he know how thin the walls are, that if they and you are in the right rooms in your respective apartments, you can hear every last word they say?

You’ve been Javier’s partner for what now feels like forever. And at some point between hiding behind walls during drug busts and the thrilling car chases through Bogotá, you fell in love.

Sometimes you wonder why you haven’t made a move. There are times when he grins at you after breaking a case or finding a lead and your heart soars, nights out drinking at bars, days where you’re on the hunt and you have each other’s backs when you wonder if maybe he feels the same. 

But you have to be reminded multiple times a week that your job relies on him fucking multiple women for valuable information, loudly.

He’s even gone so far as to offer you a night in bed with him. Multiple times. Those days are the worst. You know it would only be a one night stand and if you said yes it would break your heart.

So you settle for loving him from afar. You respect him enough to know that your feelings would only ruin things. If how he is is what makes him happy, then who are you to stop him?

You walk over to your bedroom to grab your walkman and try to drown out the sounds that will inevitably begin, hope you’ll be able to curl up on your couch and read the book you’ve been trying to start.

It takes all of three minutes for the sound of whatever is happening to breach the weak plastic of your headphones and you groan.

This is really the last straw. It’s been such a long day and Javier only made it worse by letting his hand linger a little longer than was considered friendly when handing you your coffee this morning and taking you out to lunch just to get out of the building. And then he had the nerve to leave early so that he could meet an informant, and you were stuck finishing up the paperwork, only to return home to the same sounds you were hearing now, finishing up.

You throw your headphones off and stand up. You were going to storm over and give Javier a piece of your mind when you hear something that is distinctively not sexual. It sounds like they’re fighting, there are some thumps on the floor that cannot feel good and you think you even hear something shatter.

You almost lunge over your dinner table to grab your handgun, and exit your apartment, quietly slipping over to his door, hoping he left his door unlocked. You try the handle and it glides right open. Leave it to Javier to forget to lock it in the heat of things.

You thank everything working in your favor that Javier has an entry hallway and you’re able to enter the apartment, back pressed against the wall, unnoticed. You slide closer, and the fighting has quieted. There’s no longer any human noises, just the sound of grappling, and that could definitely be sex and you really don’t want to walk in on that, but you assume the worst, Javier could really be in danger.

You peak around the corner and you freeze up. Javier is on the floor, some woman has her hand gripped around his tie and is pulling, hard, from behind. His face is bright red and a bit puffy and you notice he is unconscious.

“Hey!” you yell, pointing your gun at her, and she startles, dropping the tie, and Javier’s body flops to the ground.

You stare blankly at the limp body of your partner, which gives the woman enough time to slip out of the open window to the balcony, and you watch as she jumps over the railing, only a few feet to the ground below from the first-floor apartment.

She shouldn’t have gotten away. You could have shot her. You know that. But your breathing is shaky and you still are holding your gun up at the window, seconds after she’s gone, staring at Javier.

You finally come to and rush to the ground beside him, kneeling by his head. He can’t be dead. He just can’t be. You let out a sob and your throat is tight and pained with the oncoming tears. If Javier is dead? You don’t dare to think about what you would do.

You pull his arm into your hand, searching for a pulse, and upon finding it, you let yourself relax for a brief moment, before peeling off the tie from his neck. His skin is red and marred with a thick ring of abrasions from the rough fabric, and there are some frantic scratches on either side, suggesting he had further injured himself trying to get out.

You reach out a hand to touch the wounds, gasping as you feel how hot his skin is.

Javier sputters under your touch, his eyes springing open and coughing a few times until he calms down.

“Javi!” you exhale, “Javi, holy shit, I thought you were dead.”

He’s gasping for air, and you help him up, dragging his body over to the floor beside the couch, propping his back up against it.

You know he’s going to need treatment for the wounds on his neck, and you jump to your feet, rushing over to the kitchen. You open the freezer and push things around until you find an icepack and then throw open some cabinets, searching for some sort of pain medication. There. Inside one of the cabinets lies a few bottles of pills alongside a pitiful looking box of bandaids.

You bring the two items back to the living room where Javier is taking shallow breaths, and you sink to the ground next to him. The bottle is placed on the coffee table and you grab his hand and bring it and the ice pack to his neck, helping him hold it in place.

“Javi, when you’re ready, these pills are on the table here, you should take them,” you say.

“Y/N.” It’s the first word he’s said since you entered the apartment and you exhale shakily while managing to break a smile. He leans his head back on the couch, looking at the ceiling. “If you hadn’t come, I’d be—I’d—”

“Javi, don’t say that,” you say, “You’re okay now. That’s what matters.”

He brings his head back up and turns to look at you. You can feel his gaze but you really don’t know what to do. What to say. You look at the ground, waiting for something.

That something comes after almost five minutes of silence.

“If you think you can swallow you should try to take some pain meds,” you say.

“It doesn’t hurt much,” he says, voice hoarse. You know he’s lying.

“Still.”

Javier reaches forward to grab the bottle, sets down the ice pack, unscrews the cap and pours a pill into his palm. After swallowing, he replaces the ice on his neck, wincing at the contact.

“Do you need anything else?” you ask.

You want to say so much. You want to be mad at him. Mad that he got himself into this goddamn mess. But you can’t. All you can think about is how lost you would be if he hadn’t made it. How scared you had been, seeing him unconscious on the floor. The last time you had spoken with Javier about him doing this, about sleeping with the informants, it hadn’t gone well, and after today? You regretted every word you had said.

“Javi, you can’t keep sleeping with people to get information,” you said, slamming your hands on the desk after he brought up speaking with a fourth prostitute that week who he said would have valuable intel on one of Escobar’s sicarios.

“It works,” he shook his head, continuing to pack up his things.

“It works, but at what cost?” you threw up your hands, hoping it would emphasize your point, but Javier wasn’t even looking. “If someone finds out?”

“Tell me our most valuable leads haven’t resulted from it?” he said and he was right. Most anything of substance had come (quite literally) from Javier fucking them. But that didn’t mean you had to be okay with it.

“What if one of them knows what you’re doing? They get paid to get close to you? Try to take you out or something?” you said, voice getting dangerously loud.

“God, Y/N, you don’t have to be such a stickler for the rules, we’ve broken enough already. And I only do it with the women I trust,” he said, now at the door to your office about to leave.

“Fine, go fuck whoever you like, just don’t come running to me for help when you get hurt,” you said.

It had been four months since you had that conversation, but the irony of it all didn’t escape you. You felt bad after saying it but you feel even worse now.

“Please stay,” Javier croaks out beside you.

You nod. “Okay.”

As much as it hurts to sit next to him tonight, you can’t deny him anything. Not tonight.

It’s quiet for a while. You bring one leg up to your chest and with one hand trace little circles into the carpet.

“I thought I was going to die,” he says. He drops the ice pack in his lap. “The only thing I could think of was that I wouldn’t have gotten the chance to tell the woman I love how much she matters to me.”

Now it’s your turn to throw your head back on the couch and stare up at the ceiling. You blink a few times, realizing there are tears in the corners and you don’t know where they came from. You had gotten good at pushing your feelings away, but now, knowing that Javier had almost died? You don’t know what you would do if you had lost him. Life without Javier? It would probably break you.

And then there’s this woman he’s speaking of and you don’t know what to think of it, because Javier? In love with a woman? Singular? That wasn’t anything you had heard of. You couldn’t picture him falling for someone, wanting to spend a life with her. But you supposed it made sense. In the face of death, people realize exactly what they want in life.

It had happened to you, a couple times. Almost anyone in the field here in Colombia had those moments. Bullets flying inches from your face. Explosions where you’re caught only a few feet away from being fatally injured. Falls through unstable flooring in the apartments in the poorest parts of Bogotá. For you, those moments reminded you how important certain people were.

You didn’t have much family back home, no one significant enough to worry about, that’s why you took such a dangerous job so far from the States. But you remember waking up in the hospital a year ago, a bullet having grazed your side. Your final memories before blacking out were the feeling of warm blood pouring out across your stomach and Javier’s face. Javier, who was stuck in Bogotá for the week as you risked your life in Medellín.

“Maybe you shouldn’t waste any more time and tell her,” you say.

God knows you regretted not telling him. It was for the best, you knew. Javier wasn’t exactly the sort of guy to settle down. And the pain of rejection wouldn’t be as bad as the dull ache of seeing him every day afterwards. But if Javier loved someone? And she didn’t know? She deserved to know how much she mattered to him. That she was important enough to be the face he saw before he thought he would die.

“I don’t know,” he says, and you look over at him, brow furrowed. “She doesn’t think very highly of me.”

“How could she not think highly of you, Javi?” you say. You think the world of him, but there were plenty of reasons why someone might not. It’s not the moment to bring those up.

“It’s you, Y/N.”

You blink. Javier likes you?

“I know,” he continues, “I know you don’t—and you don’t have to—fuck. I don’t want to make this awkward”

“No,” you breathe, staring at him and shaking your head, “I—Me?”

You can’t believe what Javier had said. That all this time you were sitting on your feelings for each other, not saying anything.

“Yes, you,” he says, “Since day one, you’ve been the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. And you’re 100% there for everyone we work with. You care about people. You came rushing in today to save me even when you didn’t have to, when I didn’t deserve it. You said all that stuff, and you were right, but you still came—”

“I had to, Javi, I—I care about to you, too.” you say, “I couldn’t let you get hurt. I couldn’t lose you... I love you.”

Javier reaches an arm up to cup your cheek. Every inhale and exhale feels slower than ever before. His face has softened, a faint smile crosses his lips, more than his usual stern expressions ever allow, and there’s a certain something in his eyes, a glistening, and you bite your lip instinctively. And that’s when he leans in to take your lips in his own, and you, sinking into him, climb to your knees so that you can wrap an arm around his waist and intertwine your other hand into his hair.

It’s perfect until it isn’t as Javier jolts away with a noise that sounds painful and you jump back.

“Are you okay?” you’re back into panic mode, “Did I hurt you?”

“No, I, uh.” He lets out a breathy laugh. “I think I got too into it, moved my neck too much.”

“Do you need—”

“No, Y/N, I don’t need anything. I’m fine. I just, I need you,” he admits.

“Me too,” you say and sit back down next to him, leaning your head against his shoulder and reaching down, grabbing his hand, and interlocking his fingers with yours.

taglist; @pascalisthepunkest​ @turquiosenights @el-lizzie​ @sparrows-books​ @dxxkxx​ @opheliaelysia​ (edit: i completely forgot to tag @letaliabane​ i’m so sorry my document with my taglists was all messed up)

[lorilu]

(Most) Dream SMP members as trolls

This is more of a joke than anything and I did it in like, 30 min on discord lmao, so don’t expect anything great or even a good grammar (I’m spanish, cannot write lol) but I found it extremely fun and I thought maybe someone wants to share what they think x member could be in the troll universe.

This is a light hearted post talking about to which blood cast they’d belong to, nothing else. Also, there are certain people I know more information about than others, so don’t be surprised if there are some I did not talk about, since I have so little information about them :3

Maybe dream is a fuchsia one? He is the ruler of everything and he's been shown to have great power over everyone, tho he might also either be a cerulean because manipulation, I actually think cerulean fits dream

Georgenotfound... Hmmmmm... pretty privileges here and there and sleeps a lot.... Weird dream stuff. He sounds like a lowblood that gets everything he wants because he has a higblood on his side so imma go and say he's maybe a rustblood in <> with dream, possibly

Sapnap, fire powers, he's a bronzeblood. I think it suits him, although instead of loving animals, he's more of the opposite......

Callahan....... I barely know anything about the guy. very quiet, a funny guy. i don't know why I picture him as a goldblood that has lost the ability to talk due to that golblood illness whose name I forgot

Awesamdude. This a hard one but not at all. Jadeblood. Children, he takes care of places people can't visit. it just fits. He's green too

Alyssa. i got no clue

Ponk. I barely know him either. Like. At all. But I know he steals sometimes? So maybe an oliveblood or a rustblood?

Badboyhalo. Extremely nice demon that gets scared easily and doesn't like bad language. he's an indigo. Why? He has some power over people and he has the profile, you know, some indigobloods have been shown to be pretty polite and well mannered. he's also strong irl and does shit like thrwing knifes, so indigoblood it is

Tommyinnit. Holy fuck a hard one. Rebel child that yells a lot and is incredibly obnoxious about everything he does. Extremely manipulated but still has his own ideas and desires. Hmmmmmm..... He's deffo a lowblood because come on it's impossible he ain't a lowblood. Part of me wants to say a rust, but he's way too demanding to be a rust.... Maybe a goldblood? I think it might fit

Tubbo. The guy is NOT  a lowblood. He's probs teal or more. Maybe oliveblood, but I think maybe he fits the quiet ceruleanblood role? He's pretty chaotic and is pretty interested in nukes, he's been also shown threatening people and I am starting to think he's a tealblood and it's so funny lmao

Fundy. Ooooffffffff. No one really cares about him, disliekd by most. Lots of pranks. he a fox. He must be a goldblood because computers. yup. He's an annoying goldblood

Punz. no idea

Purpled. I think he's a hitman, so oliveblood

Wilbur soot, at first I thought he might be high on the spectrum, maybe too a purpleblood level, but then I remember how hard dream fights against him and I thought "Maybe he's lower?" but I think imma stick to the purpleblood one because he's pretty much obsessed over an idea he has and lots of people followed him, not exactly a religion, but you get me. He also refuses to wear armor and he sort of reminds me of Gamzee when he lost his beliefs

Jschlatt. he's either a cerulean or a violetblood. I don't take criticism

Skeppy. What the fuck are you my friend. lots of pranks. Idk why I think he is a lowblood He's made of diamonds but he's susceptible to mind control. I think he might be like a goldblood or a bronzeblood?

Eret. Saw it one time and I can't change the thought of sewadweller eret. Can't change my mind. bye

Jack manifold. Red and blue hello goldblood

Niki, she's really caring and bakes things. Really soft. I assign you jadeblood because caverns

Quackity. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH MAN. I had this really clear before and now I forgot what it was but I know it was a highblood but I can't remember help ahahhahagjfdjashjs A TEALBLOOD HE IS A TEALBLOOD YOU CAN'T CHANGE MY MIND IT FITS PERFECTLY SHUTUP

Karl jacobs. What the fuck time player. What are you. maybe.... hmmmm..... started a kingdom, is with quackity and sapnap. Memory boy.... Deffo not a lowblood. He might fit the tealblood thing with all his books?

Hbomb. I am scared of you. Rustblood

Technoblade. What do I assign you my guy. Violetblood Antfrost. He a cat so bronzeblood?

Philza. Philza, you immortal being. Everyone see's you as a father. I name you the head purpleblood of everything. Also, son like father pog

Connoreatspants you are a hard one because I don't know you that well, so I'll go and say you are an oliveblood because I feel like it

Puffy is either a ceruleanblood or a jadeblood and you can't change my mind

Vikkstar. Who?

Lazarbeam. Whox2?

Ranboo. You might be a purleblood too, or maybe a goldblood. I just feel like he has powers. Tho he might be a limeblood? You know, cause special. I think I'll go with purpleblood because enderman

Foolish. I feel like he is a fuchsia. WHy? Have you seen how RICH this man is? I believe he is a fuchsia that got out of the picture asap and decided to disguise as a rustblood or something. Also, dream brother pog (It's not canon but papa puffy and mama puffy go brrrrr so brothers it is)

Hannah rose. Plants go brrrrrrrr, so maybe a bronzeblood. That's all I know about her

Slimecicle. I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE IN THE SMP. The hell are you?!?!?!? You weirdo!! You are deffo aaaa........ You are a PURPLEBLOOD. Why? He tends to follow people's beliefs

[coffeecupsandquiet]

ISOLOPHILIA

“If you're lonely when you're alone, you're in bad company.” ― Jean-Paul Sartre

Basic Information

Full name: Jordan Rojas

Pronunciation: JOR-DAN RO-HAAS

Nickname(s): dont even think about it

Birthdate: January 12

Age: 23

Zodiac: Capricorn 

Gender: Cis-male

Pronouns: he/him

Romantic orientation: homoromantic

Sexual orientation: he is what the kids call, morosexual….. Jk homosexual

Nationality: American

Ethnicity: mixed (hesitate to comment beyond Italian due to my inability to track down definitive sources of Rob Raco’s ethnicity)

Current location: miami baBY

Living conditions: immaculate and modernly simplistic. A clean house is a calm house.

 Background

Birthplace: unknown

Hometown: Chicago

Social Class: upper middle? I think?

Educational achievements: nothing formal, but he does consume books at an unhealthy rate

Father: unknown

Mother: unknown

Sibling(s): unknown

Birth order: unknown

Pets: ABSOLUTELY YES OF COURSE! He has five sweet honeys, one queen named Melon, and four beautiful kittens, Cantaloupe, Sugar, Honeydew, and Galia. Fun fact, but all of the kittens names are names of melons. 

Previous relationships: non existent….. lol

Arrests: ….uhhhhhhh, absolutely not

Prison time: ^^^^^^^

 Occupation & Income

Current occupation: he do be a thief for a crime organization tho

Dream occupation: a librarian… or maybe an archivist for a famous museum…. yeah

Past job(s): being a full time SQUARE

Spending habits: hm, careful with his money, but will spend extra to make sure what he is wearing/doing/seeing is up to his standards

In debt?: this is MY fantasy and in it, i have NO DEBT so NO 

Most valuable possession: his babies… but followed up by his gold leafed edition of the Grimme Fairytales.

 Skills & Abilities

Physical strength: Above Average | Average | Below Average

Note: pre-determined that he lifts to carry the homies

Speed: Above Average | Average | Below Average

Note: do you really think you’d catch him running in gucci shoes? no

Intelligence: Above Average | Average | Below Average

Note: jordan says ‘fuck the school system!’ and then read books forever

Accuracy: Above Average | Average | Below Average

Note: jordan is very good with powers, but uh, i don’t know if he’s good with a gun. I imagine he’d flinch at the recoil

Agility: Above Average | Average | Below Average

Note: he’s a bit of a snake, but erm, not enough to be considered wily i think

Stamina: Above Average | Average | Below Average

Note: he goes to the gym, but not for endurance so-

Teamwork: hell no. total lone wolf, which is why it's a miracle he gets along with Len

Talents/hobbies: reading, obviously, but he also dabbles in piano and writing I think. Lets make fun of Jordan for writing bad poetry!!!!! Im going to throw that nerds books in the fountin

Shortcomings: stubborn as hell and also extremely stuck up. Partially because he is naturally untrusting but also partially because hes kind of a dick. 

Languages spoken: English and conversational Spanish

Drive?: hell no, hes gay

Jump-start a car?: hell no, hes gay

Change a flat tyre?: hell no, hes gay

Ride a bicycle?: yes, but the last time he did he was like 8 or something so

Swim?: yes! He actually likes it I think, but usually only if he’s alone. 

Play an instrument?: Piano! 

Play chess?: Obviously. Not seriously or anything, but he can play.

Braid hair?: Yes! He plays with his own hair when he’s bored. 

Tie a tie?: oh my god yes of COURSE he does. If he didn’t he would have to bully himself.

Pick a lock?: he’d be a pretty shit thief if he couldn’t

Cook?: yes! Nothing quite like knowing what to cook with his nice white wine

 Physical Appearance & Characteristics

Faceclaim: Rob Raco

Eye colour: blue

Hair colour: black

Hair type/style/length: shoulder length and wavy

Glasses/contacts?: contacts

Dominant hand: left

Height: 5’9”

Weight: i don’t want to answer this because i don’t know

Build: slender and lightly defined

Exercise habits: i feel so embarrassed admitting that jordan do be lifting three times a week

Skin tone: i….. Golden? idk

Tattoos: contrary to his many gifs, he doesn’t have any i don’t think

Piercings: his ears are definitely pierced though

Marks/scars: some scars from some “playful” rough housing. Nothing too extreme, just a nick on his left calf and a hidden one in his right eyebrow. 

Clothing style: clean cut. He prefers dress shirts and slacks for most occasions, and is rarely seen dressed down further than a short sleeve button up. Putting on his clothes is like putting up a front. Just a reminder to hold everyone at a distance. 

Jewellery: he does have a watch and earrings and perhaps a couple of necklaces

Allergies: none

Diet: vegetarian i have just decided right here right now

Physical ailments: none

 Psychology

I did a test with Jordan in mind for each of these fuckers.

MBTI type: INTJ-A: Bookish and reclusive are two words to describe this type, and that lines up pretty well with Jordan’s personality as well. They value themselves more so than the relationships they make, and pride themselves on getting things done. 

Enneagram type: Type 6: the Loyal Skeptic. Taken from the website “The committed, security-oriented type. Sixes are reliable, hard-working, responsible, and trustworthy. Excellent "troubleshooters," they foresee problems and foster cooperation, but can also become defensive, evasive, and anxious—running on stress while complaining about it”

Moral Alignment: Chaotic Neutral- Driven by their own purposes, willing to do anything to secure themselves. They aren’t inherently evil, but are only usually only good when it serves their purposes.

Temperament:  Take from the website: Phlegmatic - The phlegmatic temperament is fundamentally relaxed and quiet, ranging from warmly attentive to lazily sluggish. Phlegmatics tend to be content with themselves and are kind. They are accepting and affectionate. They may be receptive and shy and often prefer stability to uncertainty and change. They are consistent, relaxed, calm, rational, curious, and observant, qualities that make them good administrators. They can also be passive-aggressive.

Element: Earth

Emotional stability: At the moment in our time line, horrid. Non existent. He is just a giant ball of feelings and he HATES IT because usually he is very put together. 

Introvert or Extrovert? Incredibly introverted, if it wasn’t already obvious.

Obsession(s): Books! Clearly. But also his cats as well as fashion and cleanliness and coffee!!!!!

Compulsion(s): Making sure all of his mugs are facing the same direction in the cabinet.

Phobia(s): Claustrophobia 

Addiction(s): none

Drug use: Remember the Jordan is a pot head meme. Yeah. That

Alcohol use: usually just a glass or two of wine. Nothing to big. Usually. 

Prone to violence?: Heavens no! For all of his lifting, if someone threw a punch at him he’d probably run away.

Prone to crying?: Not in front of people, but he can be a weepy drunk depending on the time nad place

Believe in love at first sight?: Although he is a realist, he has a very very romantic and soft heart, so this one is a yes, although he would never admit it.

 Mannerisms

Accent: American

Speech quirks: talks like he’s a bored victorian scholar

Hobbies: reading, writing, playing piano, playing with cats, making coffee.

Habits: sleeping with a light on

Nervous ticks: he touches his hair when he’s nervous or thinking

Drives/motivations: his biggest motivation is staying alive and safe from the government. He knows his power could be used to hurt everyone, not just him, and that is important because there is safety in numbers. Also, he knows that there are mutants who will help him just because he is one of them. 

Fears: being taken and tested on or used against other mutants. There is litcherally no fear greater than that for him

Sense of humour?: dry and sardonic. Usually takes amusement in knowing more than you

Do they curse often?: Heavens no! If they are cursing, they are either drunk, scared, surprised, or PISSED OFF. or all of them together LMAO 

 Favorites

Animal: cat for obvious reasons

Beverage: a classic latte, for obvious reasons

Book: The Door into Summer by Robert A. Heinlein

Colour: Mahogany 

Food: Yogurt and berries

Flower: traditional roses, because he is a romantic

Gem: Mahogany Obsidian

Mode of transportation: Foot or bus

Scent: Lily and lets be real, good kush

Sport: he’s gay…...

Weather: sunny rainshower

Vacation destination: into his own bed and then no one bothers him

 Attitudes

Greatest dream: to not feel hunted no matter where he goes. He also wants to settle down with someone whom he loves and who loves him, because romance is something he has always fantasized about

Greatest fear: dying before he’s ready, but worse so, being captured and used against his will

Most at ease when: he’s snuggling up with his cats with a nice book

Least as ease when: he is in a high stress situation with no familiar faces.

Worst possible thing that could happen: being captured and used

Biggest achievement: Securing his place in the Kings and consequently out of the police as soon as he possibly could once he turned 18.

Biggest regret: Never resisting the orders of those in his foster home.

[jewin-your-mom]

Tagged by: @autisdoc

Rules: Answer 20 questions +5, then tag other bloggers you want to know better.

Name: Jackson

Nickname: People can call me Jack if they want to! I’m also called ‘Clown’ by a lot of online friends. It’s better not to ask. (*´꒳`*)

Zodiac: Sagittarius!

Height: 5’0”

Languages: English only. I tried learning Spanish multiple times, but I am terrible at absorbing language information long-term, sadly.

Nationality: American

Favorite Season: Summer, especially when it’s ~90 degrees outside! I run very cold, so warm weather is the only time I can really function well.

Favorite Flower: Romneya flowers! They look like white daises, but BETTER!

Favorite Scent: Rose oil/rosewater!! I have sensory processing issues, and I am understimulated in the ‘smell’ area, so I’m constantly dunking myself in rosewater/rose perfume.

Favorite Color: A nice pastel pink! Cotton candy pink is a nice way to put it!

Favorite Animal: Has to be a tie between the Lord Howe Island stick insect and Burmese python! I love all animals, but bugs/reptiles hold a very special place in my heart 💕

Favorite Fictional Character: Nepeta Leijon from Homestuck! She’s literally just me! Those weird stimmy habits, sharp nails, constantly teetering on the edge between ‘cute’ and ‘terrible bastard’, violently attacking people who touch me...the list goes on!

Coffee, Tea or Hot Chocolate?: Coffee! I really like it, but only if it’s really sweet/iced! I could live off of Starbucks ( ˊ̱˂˃ˋ̱ )

Average Sleep: Between 4-14 hours!! I vary a lot, and I have a very inconsistent schedule, so sometimes sleep just...doesn’t happen.

Dog or Cat Person?: I’m honestly more of a dog person! I love both, but I can pick up the body language/attitudes of dogs easier, so I tend to get along with them better!

Number of Blankets: I sleep with 4 currently, but one HAS to be heated to the max level. If one isn’t heated, 6-7 works!

Dream Trip: Hmm...probably a road trip with 3-4 good friends across the country! I want to see the world of course, but nothing beats being around the people I love.

Blog Established: I think 2017? Idk.

Followers: 206!

Random Fact About Me: I’m a huge fan of everything horror, and I fall in love with every scary buff man I see (unfortunately)! I am also Jewish!

My own 5 questions:

Favorite Horror Movie: A tie between the OG Scream and the 2003 remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre!! A Nightmare On Elm Street is a close 2nd though...

Favorite Music Artist: I love Jack Stauber so, SO much. Both his old stuff and his new stuff are GOLD! I also really like a lot of Vocaloid producers, PinocchioP, GHOST and CircusP being some of my favorites! My favorite Vocaloid itself has to be Fukase, though I absolutely adore Meiko!

Favorite Show/YouTube series: I don’t watch a lot of mainstream TV, but I find The Good Place really funny! I also love, LOVE Naruto, and Interface is an amazing YouTube show that I ADORE.

Favorite Food: CHEESECAKE ICE CREAM! Anything that’s sugary and cold, I’ll shove in my gullet. ( ´ ▽ ` )

Favorite Fandom(s): As problematic as it can be, I adore Homestuck for the way it kind of encapsulated the ‘Hanging Out With Your Teenager Friends And Being Stupid’ vibe so well. I can’t imagine my life without the fandom and the friends I met through it. I also love the Slasher, Dead By Daylight, OFF, Creepypasta, Marble Hornets and Smile For Me fandoms too! All of them just have a really accepting vibe, and the source materials all give me Big Nostalgia Vibes. （＾∇＾)

Tagging: @neathbowz , @angeltheproxy , @abbeygator-xo , @gay-defying-gravity and anyone else who wants to do this! If I tagged you and you want nothing to do with it, feel free to skip out on it. 💕💕

[purplesurveys]

752

Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend? No, my girlfriend is super laidback and in fact she’s always the one encouraging me to go out and try new stuff with other people.

Have you ever written a love letter to someone as a joke? No but that doesn’t sound like a very nice thing to do either.

How many true heartbreaks have you had in your lifetime? In a romantic sense, once. I’ve had my heart crushed in other ways as well, like when a loved one dies.

Who last grabbed your ass? It’s definitely Gab but I don’t remember when that was. It’s been a while.

Have you ever cut yourself? Yeah man, I was big on that from 2016-2017. If I remember correctly I had a short lapse last year too, which is disappointing.

Do you get a 'Good Morning' text from someone every day? Not everyday but often enough. I like them; I do feel like I need greetings like those more so these days since I haven’t gotten to see anyone other than my family for two months now.

Do you have any gay family members? I honestly think I do but my family is so secretive about everything, from family drama to who has a terminal illness to sexual orientation. I will probably be the first one to publicly come out, if everything goes right in the new few months.

Where did you get the shirt you are wearing? I got it from one of the independent clothing stores in Feliz. They sold all these really cute tiny halter tops for only ₱80 each ($1.60)?!?!?! which was wild so I went ahead and got like four, and one of them is what I’m wearing at the moment. I’m so desperate to be outside, or at least, feel like I’m outside, so I’ve taken to wearing the clothes I’d wear in public right at home loooool.

Do any of your friends dislike each other? Yes lmao it’s hilarious. Andrew (who’s part of the newer wave of members in our org) has never been able to win over my OG org friends – Jo, Kate, Aya – so it gets super awkward when both ~generations~ get together in org parties. Since I’m everyone’s friend I always have to divide my time between groups or tables so that I get to spend time with everyone :(

Who is your last missed call from? It was from Angela’s mom, who called on the morning of my birthday to greet me. I feel bad about missing the call but you have to know that I hate getting calls from anyone other than Gabie, so when I woke up to my phone ringing I just rolled over to the other side and let the call pass. I did thank her profusely once I was properly up though.

Do you feel like everything is falling apart around you? This was me last night. As a journalism major, I felt very helpless seeing ABS-CBN get off the air at 7:47 PM and even more helpless when I saw so many people rejoicing over their shutdown, with absolutely no regard for the 11,000 employees who have just lost their jobs. Times have been hard enough in the country because of the government’s poor response to the virus, and now one of our biggest sources of news and information has also been silenced. It was enough to make me shut down last night and I just couldn’t do anything, couldn’t think properly, couldn’t even talk to my girlfriend.

Was your first kiss romantic? I’ve always thought it had been more awkward, but when we got to talking about it in the past my girlfriend apparently found it very romantic and sweet.

Do you miss any of your ex's right now? No ex.

Have you ever overdosed on anything? I have not.

What would you say if you found out your last ex was in a relationship? Look two questions above.

Who was the last person to text you before you went to bed? No one texted me before bed but I did get a text upon waking up this morning; it was Andrew. I’m guessing they saw that I deactivated all my social media last night because they texted their concern for me and told me they were gonna be there for me if I needed anyone to talk to.

How many chances do you tend to give people before enough is enough? One.

Do you know anybody whose last name is a color? Answered this in a survey but yeah, Maroon and Black.

What are you most likely to go to jail for? Ooh I dunno, I’m honestly such a goody two shoes skskksks. Does answering back to the police count? That’s the legit worst thing I imagine myself doing.

Where was your last kiss? Near my car. I was leaving Gabie’s place and she walked me to my car, and I gave her a kiss before I left.

Who was your date to Prom? My cousin. I didn’t give a shit about prom during my junior year since I was super infatuated with Gabie then, I was already seeing her, and I still had no guy friends, but because prom in my school was mandatory attendance I just pulled my favorite cousin to be with me that night.

Do you still talk to your first love? Yeah, I’m still with her to this day.

Whose wedding did you go to first? I honestly don’t remember since I was gotten as flower girl so many times as a toddler. I do have photos of being a flower girl when I was 3 and at least, that’s the oldest-documented wedding I was in. I don’t know whose it was, but it must have been a very distant relative since I only went with my paternal grandparents and absolutely no one else from my family, not even my parents lol.

When is the last time you went to the beach? Nasugbu, August 2019.

Do you ever feel like life is going by too fast? For sure. April was a fucking blur.

Are you ashamed of anyone you've dated in the past? No but my friends have always made me feel like not dating Mike was a bullet dodged. I dunno what to think of it though as I barely knew/know him.

What about anyone you've been friends with? Mostly no, since former friends were important to me at some point and to be ashamed of them is to throw away the good times we did have, but I do prefer to dissociate myself from Athenna. Her behavior has turned so rotten in college and she badmouthed Angela and made her miserable for a very long time; it’s like I have no clue who she is now. Apparently people in her school also think she’s a fucking weirdo, so that has just made me all the more confused about what’s happened to her through the years.

Have you ever made out with someone in a pool? In the sea, yes. Not in a pool since there’s always kids around.

What are you doing this weekend? Same thing I’ve been doing the last 51 days I guess: have late breakfast, take several surveys, maybe take a nap, continue my Spanish lessons, play with my dog, take more surveys, maybe meet some progress on my thesis if I feel mentally capable to work on it.

Who’s the last person that slept over your house? I think it was Gabie. I’m really the only family member that brings over someone at our place for the night haha, and it’s usually Gabie.

Do you still talk to the last person you kissed? Yes.

Have you ever kissed someone with a tongue ring? No but this did remind me of when I used to have a big crush on CM Punk, who used to have a lip ring hahahahahaha.

Is it hard for you to get over a lover? As a demi, I imagine it would be very hard as it would also be losing a best friend.

Have you ever had a best friend of the opposite sex? I wouldn’t say that. I have a couple of close friends though.

Was your mom ever a stripper? No.

Do you regret any of the relationships you were in? A little bit. I wish my first relationship with Gabie ended months sooner than it actually did. The last few months of it were just us beating around the bush and physically avoiding it each other in school; it was a huge waste of time.

Have you ever tried making someone jealous? Yes, that’s what I did when we ^ finally broke up. By the time we broke up I had long accepted that the relationship wasn’t working and I was already doing a little fine, and I was well enough to do stuff to make her see that she was missing out. It’s high school pettiness so I’ve forgiven myself for it lol.

Would you ever get a boob job? I’ve definitely thought about it but idk. I’ll have to be rich enough to want to allot money for plastic surgery because it’s not very essential for me.

Did your last relationship end because of you or the other person? Because of her.

Who is the last person you flirted with? Just my girlfriend.

Whos the most racist person you know? Probably my mom. She has said some eyeroll-worthy stuff about the Chinese throughout the lockdown and I remember she initially had a negative reaction to my cousin Joelle when she introduced us to her black fiancé. I do know she’s a bit scared of me because I wouldn’t hesitate to call her out on her racism, so thankfully her statements have lessened over the years.

Do people ever compliment your eyes? Not really. It’s not a strong suit.

Have you ever lied to your boyfriend/girlfriend? Eh, just about small stuff like lying about not being hungry.

When is the last time you saw one of your ex's? Gabie was my ex at one point I guess? I last saw her March 7th.

Who was the last person you hung out with? Also Gabie. She was the last non-family member I saw before the whole world fell apart, basically lol.

Which one of your ex's do you hate the most?

Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? No. I never understood why it’s a big deal for a lot of couples and I’d genuinely like to hear a good reason why. We don’t watch porn together but Gab and I would definitely watch some on our own time and it hasn’t affected our relationship or sex life at all.

Out of everyone you kissed, give me the initials of the best kisser? I’ve only kissed one person and she kisses amazingly, so GAD.

Do you regret a lot of things you did in the past? No. Just some small stuff here and there.

How many people have you kissed this year? One.

How many people has your best friend had sex with? One.

How long have you known the last person you kissed? I have technically known her since 2002, but we didn’t know each other and become friends until 2011.

Do you think one of your friends is a slut? No. One of my former acquaintances was and I’m so not saying that in a judgy way lmao she can fuck whoever she wants whenever she wants, but I don’t really talk to her anymore + she’s no longer single.

When is your birthday? April 21st.

[sacrilvgious]

basic information

full name:  nolan helio macias nickname(s):  nolan / boston age:  twenty date of birth:  november twenty second, two thousand. hometown:  boston. current location:  parish. ethnicity:  mexican/columbian. nationality:  american. gender:  cis male. pronouns:   he / him. orientation:  gaybey. occupation:  student. living arrangements:  idk yet. language(s) spoken:  english, spanish. accent:  boston accent.

physical appearance

face claim:  diego tinoco. hair colour:  black. eye colour:  brown. height:  five foot, nine inches. weight:  one hundred and thirty one pounds. build:  pretty fit, he’s fairly active. tattoos: paw print on his right calf, outline of the state of MA on his left shoulder. piercings: none. drug use:  no. alcohol use:  nah.

story

meet my lil baby who has had a rather rough go… but he’s still chipper and bouncy in life, give me ur attitude pls and thank.

nolan was born in boston, given up for adoption at a very young age. young enough that he doesn’t remember his parents or know why he was given up but he didn’t want to dwell on it too much. he tried to imagine that his parents had good reasons/intentions.

he was bounced around between thirteen different foster homes, some of which he had no idea why they didn’t want him. one home he was kicked out of because he was “too hyper” (ironically this family had taken his weed away when they caught him with it, so his energy and hyperactivity rose and then…), another was because he was caught smoking weed and kicked out, then there were two of the most prominent times he left a home. one with mr & mrs murray, and another time with the taylor family.

starting with mr & mrs Murray, who were an older couple, around their early 50s/late 40s. they were amazing to him, damn ge loved them so much. it had been Mrs murrays idea to foster a child, and nolan came bouncing out with his bright eyes and smile and they fell in love. he was around ten years old. he stayed with them for about ten months, made a home of their house and a family with them. they would have kept him, but sadly, mrs Murray suffered a fatal heart attack. mr Murray claimed that nolan reminded him too much of his late wife, and wouldn’t be able to care for him on his own, so nolan was put back in the system.

then comes the taylor family, and this one isnt so heartfelt. tw sexual assault when nolan was fostered by the Taylor’s, he was not their first foster child. they were about to adopt their first, a girl a year or two older than nolan, named layla. to nolan, this meant a sister. to layla, she saw someone her parents might prefer and therefore was a threat to her adoption. nolan was 14 at this point, and layla being around 15/16. layla knew the rules of the foster system in and out, knew that you dont mess around with you foster siblings. so, she used that. she moved onto nolan, flirting and touching (just like his arm and more hugs than usual), but then she pulled him in for a kiss right as she knew her parents would see. since she was their first (and pretty much favourite by default), they sided with her that nolan instigated it and he was put out of the house.

after that, he stuck to mostly group homes. one of which was out of MA, and where he got his nickname boston. upon moving in, there was already a kid named nolan so they started calling him boston instead. he made good friends in this home, and he liked it there a lot, so he kept the nickname. its endearing to him.

eventually, boston aged out of the system. when that happened, he tried to make it on his own. he had some government help obviously, but it wasn’t enough for him to live properly. he had received a postcard from a friend from a previous group home who had been moved out to texas through different families, so, boston decided to head south.

he brought with him only a black backpack with photos of mr & mrs murray and some of his friends, some clothing he had and a couple twenty dollar bills and his skateboard.

it’s not until he was seventeen that he activated his werewolf gene ( yes i’m using tvd lore sue me ) but he doesn’t know that. he just thinks it comes with age, nbd. but one day he was smoking a joint outside, going for a walk. he discarded what he believed was an extinguished filter on the ground and carried on. well, it wasn’t completely out, and he had tossed it into some bushes. those bushes were close to a rather crappy wooden building, but that crappy wooden building was home to a man who could not afford anything better. he died from smoke inhalation. 

after his first shift, which was incredibly painful, he started hunting around for safe places for people like him to live. enter, evergreen parrish.

when he settled in parrish, he got a hold of Mr Murray to tell him he was okay. he still keeps in touch with him every so often. he hasn’t told him the truth about what he is.

considering he doesn’t have a job because he doesn’t have much experience, he doesn’t really have anywhere to live so he sneaks in and out of the different places to crash most nights, if he doesn’t pass out at a friend’s. he’s fairly good at sneaking.

he is a gaybey though he doesn’t really realize it yet, considering he knows nothing really lasts in his life, he hasn’t focused or been particularly interested in romantic relationships. he prefers to just stick to the momentary friendships and families he has then. so, this also means my lil boy is a virgin as well.

despite the crappy hands that have been dealt to him, Boston is a pretty happy go lucky guy. he smokes weed, has since he was a preteen and his hyperactivity got him into a fight with another kid. he uses it to chill out, not really for getting high you know?? while he can seem naive, he isn’t because he clearly has been through some shit and would love to see the good in people but knows it isn’t always that simple. pls be nice to him, he needs soft and nice things in his life.

also he p much knows how to handle his shifts, he’s a quick learner. still hurts but he’s good. he tracks mud everywhere. he’s a 

literal

puppy

[pianoperson]

Get to know me (if you want)

No one asked for this. Questions are from @chvmpagne-and-gasoline so if you wanna answer them, feel free to.

1. 6 of the songs you listen to the most?

La Campanella by Liszt, Humoresque by Dvorak, Rolling Girl by wowaka, Servant of Evil by mothy (?), Circles by Kira (?), Comptine D’un Autre Été (yes I don’t give a damn about pop culture)

2. If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Brett and Eddy from TwoSet

3. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“1997—X-Wing vs. TIE Fighter” from Armada by Ernest Cline

4. Who do you think about most?

My real life friends because they’re great, and IkeRev guys (especially Jonah)

5. What does your latest text message from someone else say?

Asking them where they are

6. Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

With. How do people sleep without clothes?

7. What’s your strangest talent?

Having random thoughts enter my mind that actually predict the future (but I never really tell anyone so)

8: Girls are cool; Boys are cool. (everyone is cool period)

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Nope, well at least I don’t think so. But I did write a poem about someone (it was never meant to be a roast poem, just a poem that was meant to be an outlet for my sadness, but it was accidentally written in such a way that it can be interpreted as one)

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

Bold of you to assume I ever played guitar. The closest was ukelele but that was for school.

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

No

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

No, unless your finger counts (hey, it gets bothersome sometimes to feel something within your nostril)

13: What’s your religion?

Roman Catholic

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Either I’m going out to eat or exercising

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind, but I always end up in front of it

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

I don’t have a favorite band.

17: What was the last lie you told?

It was probs a yes to a question I no longer remember.

18: Do you believe in karma?

I joke about it, but honestly, no.

19: What does your URL mean?

I’m a person who likes piano. That’s it.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

My greatest weakness is being too cautious to the point I get tense due to fear of failure. My greatest strength is probably scrape by school with grades 90 and above without putting in my best.

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Bold of you to assume I even have one.

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Nope, never

23: How do you vent your anger?

If I want to rant, I either rant alone or with people who think alike. But that’s with  really shallow stuff. If it’s really bad anger, I tend to keep it to myself because I feel like I’m gonna waste people’s time and my own energy.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

None

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Depends. But I’ll go with talking on the phone.

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

Nope. Not yet.

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

I hate Edgar Bright’s voice the sound of a spoon or fork accidentally scraping against the plate. I love the sound of pianos and flutes.

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if I screw up so badly that I’ll end up a failure, a loser, and a loner for the rest of my life and end up dying in pain alone?

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Ghosts, no. Aliens, a bit.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

With my right, I touch air. With my left, I touch the TV screen,

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

Nothing

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

If it smells like garbage, then automatically, it’s the worst place for me. And I’ve been to a number of places like that so I can’t specify.

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

West Coast just because I’ve been there

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Does Jonah Clemence count? He sings lol But in all seriousness, none.

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

Life is like a Pokemon game. You’re not going to win all those battles, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t give up. But if your life is Pokemon X and Y, you’re lucky.

36: Define Art.

Art is something universal yet personal.

37: Do you believe in luck?

Yes. Of course, you need to work hard, but you still have to hope that things go your way.

38: What’s the weather like right now?

Pretty cool since it’s nighttime. Clear skies too.

39: What time is it?

10:07pm

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

Nope. 

41: What was the last book you read?

Armada by Ernest Cline. It’s a great read, especially if you read Ready Player One by the same author.

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Yes. Everyone around me finds it weird.

43: Do you have any nicknames?

Yeah 

44: What was the last film you saw?

Infinity War

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

When I was grade one, I fell and hit my head. 

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Never had, never tried.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

IkeRev I guess

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Bi

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Yep. Quite a bit.

50: Do you believe in magic?

Nope. But I wish I have.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

Nope, because that’s a waste of time and energy. Also, I tend to forget they even did anything to me lol

52: What is your astrological sign?

Sagittarius

53: Do you save money or spend it?

For school and food, spend. Otherwise, save.

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

Takeout from a restaurant because there was no food at home.

55: Love or lust?

Love

56: In a relationship?

Nope

57: How many relationships have you had?

Was single, has been single, always will be single

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

I think I used to, but no.

59: Where were you yesterday?

At home

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Nope

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

Nope

62: What’s your favourite animal?

Idk. My dog I guess.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I don’t even try.

64: Where is your best friend?

At home

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

@just-shower-thoughts​ @extramadness​ @laineclemence​ @theundyingskeleton​ @valkryie-nyte​

66: What is your heritage?

Filipino with a bit of Chinese and Spanish

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Answering some questions on Tumblr

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

He doesn’t have one.

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

Sorry, what does that even mean?

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

Considering I talk to myself a lot, yes.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Go to work. I don’t think I can save that dog.

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

Yes I will tell my family and friends that I will die. Yes I will be very afraid. I will go to confession as soon as possible and perhaps try to do some stuff before I die.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Trust

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

The One That Got Away by Katy Perry just because nostalgia

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

My lips are sealed about that.

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Being great friends grants a great relationship.

77: How can I win your heart?

You can’t.

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

No, but it can make you do the things you want to do by removing all insecurities and inhibitions preventing you from doing those things.

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Staying alive

80: What size shoes do you wear?

If we’re talking about closed shoes, size 5

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

Never thought about it

82: What is your favourite word?

Right now, it’s Queen.

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Jonah Clemence (ok how many times have I said his name in this post)

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

“Lol”, “nice”, “I wanna die.”, or “Patayin mo na ako.”

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

Melt’s cover of Rolling Girl

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Blue and black

87: What is your current desktop picture?

A galaxy

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

I don’t want to have that on my conscience and my record so nope.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

Do I have a kink?

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Clutch my blanket and stay still, trying to think of a way to get them out without inadvertently causing my death.

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Psychic powers

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

That one time I touched a thermometer that wasn’t supposed to be touched in grade two. Everyone got mad at me for it. It took me three or four years to get over the shame from that incident.

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

2016. What a time waster.

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

That’s uncomfortable...

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Iceland just because it sounds great

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

Nope

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

Never, which is great

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yep

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

Jesus is the answer.

[swishandflickwit]

Shirbert — to live would be an awfully big adventure 1/1

Summary: Gilbert gives Anne her troth necklace.

(shirbert + neck kisses)

Words: 2.1k

Rating: General Audiences

AN: I just finished Anne of Windy Poplars and idk if I just missed it but I honestly don't remember how Anne got her pearl necklace??? It was like I was reading and poof! It was there! And my overactive ass started to think about where Gilbert could have gotten it and how and thus, this was born :)

Special thank you to the beta babes: @acourtoftruelove, @tiredsosleeping and @ofshipsandswans!! Your input is invaluable as always!!!

Also on ff.net | AO3

Other writing

He doesn’t mean to buy it.

No, really.

He. does. not.

And even if he does, they certainly aren’t for her.

(This is what he tells himself, laying on his hammock in the bowels of the ship, surrounded by pitch black and clutching at them like they were the very last source of light in the world)

No—he buys them because he can, and because the peddler’s heart radiates a kindness and a benevolence that resonates to Gilbert’s own soul and so he knows, with indisputable certainty, he deserves not to be separated from those he loves most.

There are, what seems like, hundreds of stalls littered all over Trinidad. The docks alone boasts of a market filled with a ragtag combination of goods, of differing shapes and sizes, catering to all sorts of distinctive ailments and demands. Not that Gilbert needs anything… which is why he doesn’t know what draws him to the ramshackle pile arrayed into a sorry excuse for a booth.

Or maybe he does.

He doesn’t have an eye for jewelry, at least he doesn’t think so, for his mother’s own baubles had been sold off—to provide for his father’s health care and sustain the farm—save for a few key pieces and heirlooms, but there is no denying the pulchritude of this merchant's wares. He and Bash were headed for the ship when a glint from his peripheral caught his eye, so bright was its glare. Like a moth to a flame, he gravitates towards its light, bypassing the droves of attractive vendibles for the multitudes of spherical orbs strung together in artful strands.

“You have.”

A weathered hand enters his line of vision as it presents the precious goods with a proud flourish and he follows the length of the muscled arm to the person attached to it. His olive skin gleams gold, telling of many a days spent working under the sun. His eyes are angular, his nose flat and his lips full and wide, as if always poised to smile. It prompts Gilbert to twist his own mouth into a grin, and the two smirk in delighted conspiracy though they have never seen the other before this very moment.

“You have,” the jeweler remarks again, this time tugging at his sleeve lightly. Gilbert laughs, not because what he says is particularly funny but because of how he says it, not so much phrased as a question or suggestion yet not a command or a rude edict either. Instead he hears a statement, a finality within those two words, spoken as they are in knowing yet gentle tones. As if Gilbert was always meant to land in this deserted and decrepit corner of the port—his eyes destined to feast upon the rows and rows of effulgent pearls laid before him like a banquet to feed his starving gaze.

“I didn’t know we harvested pearls in Trinidad,” Bash remarks, a wonderment to his inflection that informs Gilbert his friend is just as captivated as he. The jeweler shakes his head.

“No—no Trinidad,” he pauses, the two men leaning forward in anticipation. The jeweler smiles, a flair for dramatics evident in his every gesture as he tilts his head, takes a deep breath and reveals, “Las islas Filipinas.”

“Las islas Filipinas,” Gilbert repeats, as though harkening the words back to him would stunt his ever growing curiosity. “Where is that?” he asks, almost aggressively, that same curiosity puppeteering his movements. The jeweler’s grin only widens as he delights in Gilbert’s inquisitiveness.

“East,” the jeweler says and in his own vigorous eagerness, Bash adds, “East? Asia?”

He nods, a whole new light entering his eyes at the recognition of his homeland. “Sí, sí! My home—Perlas,” he points at the rows and rows of pearls, “ng Silanganan.”

Gilbert shakes his head as dejection weighs heavy on his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he sighs. “I don’t speak…”

“Tagalog,” provides the jeweler. “It is all right,” he reassures, “I speak, little English. Little Spanish. We understand each other, sí?”

The smile never once wavers from his lips and Gilbert feels something in him lift. He cannot pinpoint what that something is exactly, only that he senses a bond between him and this jeweler that he finds difficulty putting into words. Still, it isn’t an unwelcome sensation. If anything, it puts him at ease.

“I’m Gilbert,” he says and with a nod to his companion, he introduces him. “This is Bash. What’s your name?” He holds out his hand.

The jeweler tilts his head at the proffered limb as though seeing it for the first time, confusion clouding his gaze. “My name?”

All of a sudden, the cloud in his eyes transforms into a mist, overflowing till they line his face. Gilbert blanches, panic seizing him as apologies spill from his lips. The jeweler stops him by grasping his outstretched palm between his own. “No. No sorry. It has been long, long time since I have told another my name.”

“You were a slave.” There is no question to Sebastian’s hard tone, only harrowing familiarity and resignation as he eyes the jeweler with a newfound affinity. The jeweler’s shoulders sag.

“Still slave.”

“What?”

“That is why I sell perlas. Save enough money to join boat. Go home to my country and fight. Find my beloved. My sinta.”

His name is Alon, he tells them. In his native language, it means waves—“I was born in sea, I work in sea, and I will die in sea.” He hails from one of over 7,000 islands in Filipinas where generations of his family gathered pearls, going out to the ocean where they lived at the first hint of dawn and returning just when the remaining trace of sun was a line of orange ray along the horizon. But the reach of the Colonizers throughout the country grew till their island and eventually, their village, could no longer escape them any more than the rise of the tide. His master took him from his family—a wife and one child, for they had been married only a short time and they could not bear to bring more into a life of servitude—to sell the jewels in Acapulco, Mexico. They arrived but he managed to escape, with the pearls fortunately, and had been trying to make his way back home by selling them bit by bit since.

“For you,” Alon points to Gilbert before handing him a hoop of gleaming, white pearls.

“Oh, I—I don’t,” he stutters. I don’t have anyone waiting for me back home, not like you, is what he means to say though for an inexplicable reason, he cannot bring himself to speak the words out loud—his fingers closing over the necklace even as he thrusts it back to Alon’s direction. He shakes his head.

“For you,” he repeats, his eyes fixed and his tone firm through the elated smile that unendingly shapes his lips. “For your sinta,” he affirms with a hand to his heart. With his free hand, Gilbert slips into his bag to dole out his payment when Alon stops him. It is Gilbert’s turn to insist. He pays double the asking amount.

“I hope you find your way home. I hope you save your country, and you be with your wife.”

Bash, who till then has remained tense and stoic, brings out more than a couple notes himself.

“You deserve to have your life be your own,” Sebastian says as he passes the money to Alon, whose eyes have filled with insurmountable tears once more. “May this bring you closer to freedom, friend.”

Alon leaves his place behind the rickety stall to hug them both.

“Maraming salamat,” he murmurs, droplets coursing down his cheeks to land onto the cloth of their shoulders. “Thank you.”

They pull away, but only at arm’s length from each other.

“I have greeting in my home, mabuhay. It means live, but we say it both hello and goodbye so… mabuhay, good friends.” He kisses both their hands. “Mabuhay.”

Gilbert closes his eyes, his entire being awash in peace even as he stands in the middle of one of the busiest places of Trinidad. They may have just met, but it is with stunning clarity that Gilbert finally understands what Anne means when she speaks of meeting a kindred spirit. For what other name could there be for the emotions welling inside him? For the way his soul had reached out to Alon’s from across the market, hidden as his booth was? For the immediate, albeit brief, friendship that sprung between them?

This is what he murmurs onto Anne’s skin, after all these years, once he clasps the circlet of white pearls around her neck.

“What?” she says, turning with a flourish as she tilts her head back with pride, so that he may admire her better.

(And admire he does, planting another kiss onto the hollow of her throat, falling enraptured by the way her breath hitches and their hearts beat in perfect unison—booming, racing, delicious staccatos against their pressed chests)

“Mabuhay,” he reiterates, though no louder than a whisper as he pulls her even closer, this divine enchantress who holds his heart. “I bought this necklace during my travels and the man who sold it to me, it was his parting words. I never forgot them. It means ‘live’.”

“You’ve had this all that time?”

Anne gasps as astonishment brightens her blue eyes at the revelation. It brings forth a chuckle from him.

“It’s funny. I told myself that these pearls weren’t for you. I fancied myself merely helping a friend out. But to see them now… how could I be so foolish?” He traces the line of gems, his fingers brushing against her collarbone in lambent strokes. Anne purrs, her eyes fluttering, and Gilbert—unable to help himself—captures her bottom lip between his, sucking at the luscious curve of her mouth before uttering, “they were never meant for anyone but you.”

She blushes, the blooming red staining first her cheeks then her neck. He kisses her there again, harder this time, till he leaves a mark. Anne moans and he feels it to his bones, a shiver pulsing down his spine.

“You make me feel alive, Anne.”

“I think… I think I was drowning, before I met you,” she tells him when his kisses have made their way from the curve of her shoulder to the curve of her cheek. “I think you saved me.”

“Impossible,” he avers, sincerity coating his inflection and burning through his molten, silver gaze. “As much as I want to, you’ve never needed anyone to save you. You’ve always been strong enough to be your own prince.”

She kisses him, for how could she not? Anne has often thought she needed other people to save her. It isn’t till Gilbert that she figures, it was within her to save herself.

“Maybe so,” she concedes. “But I was lost,” she tucks a stray curl behind his ear, her thumb caressing his cheek as she goes. “I was lost until you.”

For three years they will be engaged albeit living in separate places, Anne to her principalship in Summerside and Gilbert to medicine school in Kingsport. But on the long and lonely nights he is away from her, when the din of the boarding house becomes too loud, the presence of the men too suffocating, he will think about those pearls. He will think of Alon, and what he had to endure having even been further away from his sinta than Gilbert ever will be and he will sigh, mabuhay, because he is here and he lives in a world where Anne too is alive and he will hope. He will hope and hope and hope, that his friend and his family are too.

(And even more years later, he will smile and triumph when news arrives on the island, of the independence of Las islas Filipinas from a 300-year tyranny)

He will think about how he was on the other side of the globe and still, upon seeing the jewels, try as he did with all his might to deny it, his first thought was of Anne. He will think about the sheen of it against her delicate neck and how it illuminates her skin. He will think about how it isn’t so much the pearls that shine but Anne herself, her very essence and spirit infusing the air around her with a glow that draws you in.

But for now… now he avows—

“You are the sun, Anne. You are the sun, the moon and the North Star. Should a tempting peregrination strike me in my darkest hours away from you, I will look to the sky and know.”

He cups her face between her hands.

“All the roads lead back to you.”

AN: This one is really close to my heart. I hope you enjoyed it!

come say hi to me!

[because-cur-non]

(whichever of these you haven’t been asked yet) aubrietia, basket of gold, bellflower, black-eyed Susan, bugle herb, catnip, cock’s comb, daisy, glory of the snow, hellebore, lantanas, transvaal daisy :)

omg I was saving this one and then forgot

Aubrieta: Favorite drink? 

I like tea a lot haha.  I have a whole ton of different kinds and I’m a little bit pretentious about what brands I’ll buy (hint: unless it’s a novelty because I’m traveling or it’s a particular medicinal one, it’s not going to be from a grocery store).  It’s really the only thing I “collect.”  It’s cold out and I basically spent all day today working at my apartment so I made I think 7 mugs-worth?  And I’m definitely going to have a couple more before bed.

My second favorite drink is regular water.

Basket of Gold: Describe your family. 

I’m an only child and I don’t have any first cousins and my second cousins are all at least six years older than me.  (Or they live in a different country and I’ve only met them once or twice.)  tbh I see my girlfriend’s family a lot more than my own haha

Bellflower: Favorite animal? 

I still really like deer a lot!  I know they’re dumb and whatever but I think they look neat!

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

Probably a cat haha…  Just sleep in a sunbeam on the floor…  Enjoy climbing over all the surfaces…

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?  

Probably panicking, if I’m being honest haha!  idk like an “ideal day” if we take that foreboding doom out of it would be hanging out with my friends back home for a bit but also doing things with just my girlfriend like idk going to get ice cream and just driving around for a while.

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight? 

This is still stashed away in one of the drawers in my parents’ bathroom!

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

I like verdana in a nostalgic sort of way.  I don’t like to use it or anything but when I see it I’m like “hey it’s that one” haha.  Uh, I usually just use Times New Roman.  Maybe more to the spirit of this question, I like my footnotes to be in size 11 instead of 12.

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

I beat Pokemon Omega Ruby in Spanish with an all-grass team.

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life? 

1) I like that it was snowing today ❄️ That was very pretty!  

2) I like my friends a lot and appreciate their company and support!  This includes online as well as irl people ofc. I really hit it off with the girl I was TAing with too and I’ve been on good terms with people in my department in general and have hung out with some of them, but this was the first time we were both like YES WE NEED TO SCHEDULE SOMETHING LET’S GET COFFEE 

3) Also ofc I am grateful for my girlfriend and her support as well! She’s been very supportive in general and we have a lot of fun together and I’m trying to be patient and wait and not ask to share the stuff she’s writing with the internet before she’s ready because it’s so good, you guys :(((  Also I get to see her soon!  Being in a relationship with her has encouraged me to work harder at being an emotionally functional adult and I’m learning a lot and, like, everything else aside even I appreciate that opportunity.  

4) I appreciate that both my cousins with kids have been asking me to interact with the kids again, because I used to a lot and then stopped abruptly a couple of years ago because the thought of dealing with extended family was just way too much and I was scared of how they would react.  I say “again” like they were telling me not to before, but it’s really just that I saw how my mom reacted and panicked that that was going to be standard for everyone on that side.  

5) Ok on that note though I do appreciate my parents too lol I really only mention them usually if I’m complaining about them, but I love them and they try.  

6) I’m currently using a pretty warm and awesome Irish wool throw ;) 

7) I made mochiko chicken tonight, which is one of the recipes I do when I’m feeling ambitious enough to commit to prepping something to cook a day in advance, and it came out the best I’ve ever made it.  Turns out not being impatient and instead leaving the heat on medium is the smarter choice.  Who knew.  

8) I appreciate that my girlfriend and I are on the same page re: rules about pets, (non)biodegradable cleaning supplies, plastic.  (Can you tell what we bitch about together on the phone lol)  Also: when people we know are being rude and need to Stop.

9) I’m grateful that have an excuse to claim I live in Hawaii whenever it’s useful to do so (my driver’s license is for Hawaii and my car is registered there) because that’s made some of the legal trans paperwork a lot easier.  I really should have just waited to do the name change in Hawaii too, because then it would have been cheaper and I wouldn’t’ve had to go to court 🙄  (The judge was nice tho.)  But whatever, it wouldn’t’ve been possible to do the gender change here and I needed to do that before getting new IDs (which I had to do ASAP for unrelated reasons) or I would’ve had to pay to redo them.  It’s very easy to legally change your gender in Hawaii.  Much recommended!  (Also it was much easier to get on HRT there than it was where I’m going to school.  Like… if you can… just find an informed consent place… it’s so much easier……..) 

10) Okay this is dated a little, but I’m also still grateful that my girlfriend and I got to see Hamilton with the OBC.  I had assumed it wouldn’t be a possibility at all so it was really neat to be able to go!!

Hellebore: How do you show affection? 

Gifts lol.  If I’ve ever given you anything with even a little bit of thought put into it, it’s me wanting to be friends.  I start looking for Christmas/Hanukkah presents way too early, too. 

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? 

My advisor told me I write well and that he wasn’t really concerned about however I choose to organize my final chapter the last time I met with him, which is mostly a good compliment because like many grad students I live terrified that I’m going to be made to redo things, hahaha…  So that was a relief to hear!!

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing? 

Like……….  It’s dumb, but I really really really like my black Forever 21 sweater with the metal stud gold heart on the front.  I got it on sale for like $9 back when they were doing that season where everything was black and gold and metal and I wear it all the time when it’s cold out.  It’s stretched out and nubby but it’s so comfortable and I love it so much and it’s one of the only items of “girl” clothing that I never considered tossing when I was going through my wardrobe a couple years ago.  Honestly, it’s just the best sweater, even if I wore it through security at an airport once and got scolded.

Thank you!!!

[bornofbloodandwater]

— fill out with muse information —

                              ABOUT THE MUSE.

General

Name: Xiomara Athanas

Alias(es): Xio, Mara, Ioma, Golden Wraithe

Gender: Woman

Age: 170ish depending on verse

Date of Birth: 1850s

Place of Birth: Gennaios (An island somewhere between modern day Greece and Libya)

Hometown: N/a

Spoken languages: Greek / Libyan Arabic / English / French / Italian / Spanish / German / Croatian / Russian 

Orientation: Bisexual 

Occupation: Assassin

Criminal record: Assassination, torture, 1st degree murder, kidnapping, robbery, aggravated assault, arson, money laundering, prostitution, blackmail, forgery, bribery, concealing escaped prisoners/person from arrest, misuse of passports/visas/permits (If she was ever caught of course)

Appearance

Eye color: Gold. 

Hair color: Brown. 

Height: 162 cm / 5′4. 

Scars: An inch long scar beneath her cheekbone, a symmetrical traditional design of scars across her upper and central back. (Plenty more that she chooses to hide)

Physique: Lithe, athletic, powerful.

Favourite...

Color: The lavender of dawn by the ocean.

Hair color: Dark hair and greying hair.

Eye color: All kinds, natural and unnatural. (But she seems to have a fondness for green and grey eyes, just my notes.)

Song: Ne Me Quitte Pas - Maysa

Movie: She has seen precious little, but her favourite, and only one of two she has seen in a cinema, is Vivre Sa Vie

T.V. Show: -

Food: Pastries, fresh fruit, a lover.

Drink: Water, whisky, jasmine green tea with honey. 

Video Game: - 

Ice cream flavor: Mango or green tea.

Have you…

Graduated high school: No.

Had sex: Yes. 

Had sex in public: Yes. 

Gotten pregnant: No. 

Kissed a boy: Yes. 

Kissed a girl: Yes.

Gotten tattoos: No.

Gotten piercings: Yes.

Smoked/drank/done drugs: Yes / Yes / Yes.

Had a broken heart: Yes.

Been in love: No.

Needed surgery: Yes.

Stayed up for more than 24 hours: Yes.

Are you…

A virgin: Of certain things, yes. Idk what we’re classifying this as anymore but Xio doesn’t consider herself a virgin seeing as she wasn’t raised in a society that catergorises people based on experience.

A cuddler: If she likes you, yes.

A kisser: Absolutely.

Scared easily: No. 

Jealous easily: She has been in the past but she never blames her partner/flame. 

Trustworthy: Depends what you’re trusting her with, secrets? yes. Your life?...uhhh how confident are you that she likes you? 

Dominant: Yes. 

Submissive: No. Yes she is. 

In love: No. 

Single: Always. 

In a relationship: Never. 

Considered mean: To many.

Random questions.

Have you harmed yourself: Yes. 

Thought of suicide: Yes. 

Attempted suicide: Yes. 

Wanted to kill someone: Yes. 

Drove a car: Yes. 

Have/had a job: Yes. 

Have any fears: Yes.

Family

Sibling(s): One sister (deceased).

Parents: Both parents (deceased), raised entirely by her sister.

Children: No.

Pets: Two cats, Faye -fawn coat longhair- and Celeste -mottled cream and grey shorthair-

[toast-connoisseur]

All the "weird asks"

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? -I’m actually obsessed with coffee mugs and tea cups even though I don’t drink coffee nor tea.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? -Chocolate bars

3. bubblegum or cotton candy? -Cotton Candy!

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? -It’s funny because I actually found some of my old report cards recently... they range from “a pleasure to have in class!” to “danger of failing the course” even though my grade for both of those would be an “A” ?

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? -The soda from a bottle from Mexico hits completely different.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? -Personally, I don’t dress like any of those but I am attracted to tomboys.

7. earbuds or headphones? -Depends. Mostly, earbuds.

8. movies or tv shows? -Movies.

9. favorite smell in the summer? -All the seasonal smells from the stores!

10. game you were best at in p.e.? -Softball or tennis.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? -One slice of toast and one egg.

12. name of your favorite playlist? -I made my friend a playlist called “Emo Turn Up” and I like that one a lot.

13. lanyard or key ring? -Key ring, but I have a lanyard because I tend to leave my purse in the car and that way I can just carry my keys around my neck. Also, my lanyard is Nightmare Before Christmas themed, so she’s beautiful.

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? -Lollipops, actually lol

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? -Rosemary’s Baby. Although, I kind of got to pick the book for my assignment.

16. most comfortable position to sit in? -One leg is usually elevated while the other has my foot flat on the ground.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? -My Chuck Taylor’s!

18. ideal weather? -I have two technically. I love blue skies with a slight breeze but I also love windy rainy weather.

19. sleeping position? -On my side, on leg curled up and the other straight (kind of like how I sit) while I hold a pillow to my chest.

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? -Notebook and post its!

21. obsession from childhood? -Stickers!! Although I never actually stuck them anywhere except on other papers or just left them on their page. I collected them so I didn’t like them getting ugly.

22. role model? -Dita Von Teese!

23. strange habits? -I guess if it’s habit, I probably wouldn’t consider it strange. I do write everything down. Like, everything. I have a list of every movie I’ve ever watched (I had to stop updating it because it was giving me anxiety due to how many movies I watch), I make post it notes that I eventually compile into notebook pages. Any information I never want to lose gets written down somewhere.

24. favorite crystal? Aventurine

25. first song you remember hearing? -It would’ve been something in Spanish. Most likely one of the many songs my mom used to sing to me.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? -Although I rarely get to do it: sitting in the sun/going to the beach or a pool. If it’s warm with a breeze I can lay outside for quite some time.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? -Watch movies on the couch with a blanket over me.

28. five songs to describe you? -Brown Eyed Girl (the original is nice but I love the Reel Big Fish version), Because I’m Awesome (The Dollyrots), Hot Mess (Cobra Starship), I’m Just a Kid (even though I’m almost 25. Simple Plan), Independent (Webbie)

29. best way to bond with you? -Be open and honest. I love talking about books, movies, and music but talk to me about conspiracy theories and ghost stories and you’ll have my heart. I love when people have stories revolving around their culture. I’m Mexican and we have lots of myths and stories to swap so it’s awesome.

30. places that you find sacred? -A person’s bedroom can be sacred. Call me silly but Disneyland is kind of sacred to me. It hold so many wonderful memories. I only like to share certain spots with certain people sometimes.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? -Probably whatever outfit I have on at the moment. I don’t really plan to kick anyone’s ass let alone want to plan a whole outfit for it. I assume leggings and a t shirt will do?

32. top five favorite vines? -omg I miss vine! I was actually going through vines on YouTube recently... The “Miss Keisha” vine always kills me, any vine with Sarah Baska, anything that Zane and Heath ever made, Jay Versace has really funny vines too, and I still quote the “welcome to Chilis” vine constantly. Picking 5 is way too hard.

33. most used phrase in your phone? -“it be like that sometimes” or “yaaaaaaas”

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? -The Red Robin commercial and the O’Riley Auto Parts one play in my head on loop at the worst times.

35. average time you fall asleep? -I lay down around 9ish but don’t actually fall asleep until 10PM

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? -That’s way too hard to remember. Probably something I would consider really stupid now.

37. suitcase or duffel bag? -Depends on how long I’ll be away/how many clothes I’ll need. Usually, a suitcase.

38. lemonade or tea? -Lemonade.

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? -omg why would you make me pick?! Lemon meringue pie though...

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? -I went to a public high school in LA. We mostly had riots and fights and I stayed away from all of that.

41. last person you texted? -Jayla. I need her to wake up so I can tell her about my dream about Beyoncé.

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? -Por que no los dos?! I like buying men’s jean jackets because they have pockets inside though...

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? -Depends. I tend to get cold easily so I usually start with a cardigan but I love jean jackets.

44. favorite scent for soap? -just plain ol clean??

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? -Fantasy

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? -Depends on the weather but usually just shorts and a t shirt.

47. favorite type of cheese? -Mozzarella

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? -Grapes. Sweet and sometimes a little sour lol

49. what saying or quote do you live by? -“Let your imaginarlo run free”. I actually have it tattooed on my right bicep.

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? -My friends always get me to laugh really hard. I think the hardest I’ve ever laughed was when my friend tried to say something and she completely botched the sentence so it was pure gibberish and yet I understood her? We just looked at each other and burst into laughter.

51. current stresses? -Work, school, life... the usual??

52. favorite font? -Arial

53. what is the current state of your hands? -I am typing my answers to these questions on my phone...

54. what did you learn from your first job? -I only have infinite patience for kids, not adults.

55. favorite fairy tale? -Used to be Cinderella, but I was never really one for fairy tales tbh

56. favorite tradition? -I don’t actually have any. Never really had anyone to have traditions with.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? -2018 was an entire struggle, car crashes because idiot drivers crashed into mine and totaled mine (TWICE), my entire life as a whole has been a struggle tbh. Every day is one that I try my hardest to overcome.

58. four talents you’re proud of having? -I don’t really consider myself as someone with any talent, let alone four, but... A mathematician once taught me how to divide any number by five in my head, I’m pretty good at mimicking certain accents, idk of this counts as a talent but I can drink quite a bit before I actually feel anything, I can recite certain movies down to what song will play during certain scenes, and I would consider myself the ultimate Disneyland tour guide. That’s five but it’s all I can think of so if one doesn’t sound like one, we have an extra.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? -“Oh shit, here we go again...”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? -I know nothing about anime so I wouldn’t even know. I would want to make a joke about being in the ones that are essentially pornos but I’m probably wrong with that too.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? -“The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” Idk if the line comes from elsewhere but I first heard it in the movie Moulin Rouge and it has stuck with me since.

62. seven characters you relate to? -Oh geez, I don’t really relate to any tbh but seven characters I like: Princess Tiana, Shane from The L Word, Theo from the Netflix version of A Haunting of Hill House, Satine from Moulin Rouge, Wall-E, Cassandra from Saved!, and The Grinch (as wonderfully played by Jim Carrey)

63. five songs that would play in your club? -Act Up (City Girls), Motivation (Normani), LGBT (Cupcakke), Alcohol (Millionaires, lol), My Type (Saweetie)

64. favorite website from your childhood? -Neopets!

65. any permanent scars? -I have one from when I stuck my hand in a garbage can because I was looking for something and wound up cutting myself on all the glass that had been thrown in. The scar is super tiny and on my pinkie lol

66. favorite flower(s)? -Roses and carnations

67. good luck charms? -I don’t have any anymore.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? -I tried sea urchin once and I swear I can still taste it.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? -All leaves have symmetry (unless tampered with)

70. left or right handed? -I’m right handed but I use my left hand as dominant for a lot of stuff? It’s weird.

71. least favorite pattern? One that isn’t symmetrical.

72. worst subject? -I was once good at math and now I’m horrible.

73. favorite weird flavor combo? -Some think syrup on bacon is gross but I love when the syrup from my pancakes falls on it!

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? -10

75. when did you lose your first tooth? -I have no idea. I lost all my baby teeth early on. I’ll go with 5 or 6...

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? -Can’t go wrong with French Fries!

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill? -I recently revived the orchid my boss has on his windowsill and I’m quite proud of that.

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? -I don’t drink coffee but I love sushi...

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? -Now, my driver’s license photo. I retook it recently lol

80. earth tones or jewel tones? -Jewel (with a mix of earth?)

81. fireflies or lightning bugs? -There’s a difference? Fireflies, I guess?

82. pc or console? -Console, though I love PC games.

83. writing or drawing? -I’m shit at drawing but I love to doodle. Writing is my favorite though.

84. podcasts or talk radio? -Podcasts

84. barbie or polly pocket? -My childhood nickname is Barbie (my middle name is Barbara) so I only played with Barbies even though I only dressed them because I liked their clothes and then then threw them to the side to play other games.

85. fairy tales or mythology? -Mythology

86. cookies or cupcakes? -Cookies

87. your greatest fear? -Being buried alive.

88. your greatest wish? -To be truly happy.

89. who would you put before everyone else? -My family/close friends.

90. luckiest mistake? -My entire life? I guess it would be taking a job in a field I knew nothing about which led me to learn about said field. I’m now somewhat successful in that field.

91. boxes or bags? -Depends on what I’m carrying but I love boxes. Bags are much easier though... I guess I’ll go with bags.

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? -Sunlight/sunset.

93. nicknames? -Barbie, a friend in high school used to call me West Side Story because my first name is Maria, Barbz...

94. favorite season? -Fall

95. favorite app on your phone? -I like IG

96. desktop background? -Wildflowers

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized? -5? My friends have changed their numbers before so I remember their old numbers only lol

98. favorite historical era? -I love the fashion of the fashion and cars of the 1940s but I would never want to go back. We’re barely making any progress towards equality as is so going back would not be an option for me.

Thanks for the questions, Anon!💞

[limpblotter]

Coffee Break!

a/n: break from prompts to do an impromptu fic-for-art exchange with one of the sweetest artists, lordy idk why he even wants to do this exchange, its completely unfair because I’m definitely getting the better end of this bargain. Especially since I requested something completely ridiculous from him but GOD is it BEAUTIFUL summary: In a world, where Johan swaps out Usnavi’s regular coffee with decaf, Usnavi has, what he thinks is, the worst day of his life. (aka: Decaf!Au) w/c: 2184 Sincerely tagging: @lilldov

 ‘Caffeine can  really stress the heart out…’ Bow said to Johan once while they offhandedly passed by a local coffee shop with a line zipping all the way around the block. Ever since then Johan couldn’t help but think about it. Coffee, like anything in excess, couldn’t be good forever. Even more so some time before, Bow had mentioned that Hispanics have a higher chance of heart disease…since then Johan’s health craze has been…well unbearable to anyone who didn’t love him as much as Usnavi did.  Luckily for Johan, Usnavi loved him immensely and while his diet was…intense Usnavi knew it was because he cared. There was only one thing he wouldn’t change. Coffee. Usnavi didn’t just serve it, he was raised on it. It seemed weird to Johan (which was saying a lot) but a lot of Usnavi’s culture felt rooted in this drink. The skill to brew it, the stories told over a cup of coffee, how coffee spoke to people. This was a third language to Usnavi and it was one he wasn’t going to let Johan mess with. So on the day, on Usnavi’s worse day, Johan for once had gotten up earlier than Usnavi. He eyed the yellow, demon can of caffeine that may or may not send his small, beloved man to an early grave and decided to do a small experiment. He grabbed a plastic bag and dumped the contents of the dirt looking powder inside, and opened an organic, vegan baggie of decaf coffee powder. He replaced it, gave it a small sniff, and to Johan there was no difference. “Mornin’ cariño, you’re awake? So early?” Usnavi sleepily rubbed his eyes, emerging from the bathroom. Johan, still in his sleeping clothes (consisting of just sweatpants, nothing else), smiled at him. “What can I say; I’m getting use to your early morning ways.” He tried to sound like a less guilty man but his smile twitched, he felt nervous. It dawned on him how important coffee was to this man. This…could possibly make or break them. Suddenly Johan wanted to take it all back but Usnavi had already moved towards the yellow tin and broke it open. He paused and sniffed it a little, he didn’t take his usual exhale of relief. He eyed the coffee and pondered. “Johan” “Y-Yeaaa” Johan suddenly started darting over to the living room. He stood by the window and bent over. “The coffee, does it smell…” Usnavi’s eyes wandered up, and just as Johan had innocently planned, Usnavi was stopped dead in his tracks by Johan in his downward dog pose. The Dominican tilted his head completely forgetting what he had to say. For the moment he enjoyed the few of his boyfriend stretching by an open window, shirtless and going commando under his sweatpants. Johan smirked thank god for Yoga. He stood upright letting his boyfriend eye his muscular back as he stretched into a sun salutation pose. “Hm, did you say something my sweet, jouet.” He wiggled an eyebrow intensifying the Usnavi’s already flustered expression. The combination of Usnavi’s undying lust over his man and the fact his brain was working on low without coffee, he blanked. “Nada…es nada…” He mumbled in Spanish, finding it hard to even form English at this point. Spanish was Usnavi’s safe way of being flustered and Johan not knowing what he was saying. “No es justo que un hombre debriera ser tan hermoso en *la mañanita de la manana” (It’s not fair a man can be that beautiful in the wee hours of the morning- informal slang). Usnavi grumbled as he made his coffee. Johan continued to do yoga, not really concentrating since he was watching Usnavi’s every move as he downed the coffee. Like with the smell he paused, smacked his lips together tasting the coffee. He turned to Johan as if to ask something but Johan immediately dropped into a bridge pose. Was he exploiting his flexibility to keep Usnavi from asking anything that he may or may not be able to lie about? Of course. Was it working? Absolutely. Usnavi eyed his boyfriend as he held himself up, his arms and abs flexed making the Dominican lose track of every thought including his name at this point. “Are you going to work today, hun?” Johan spoke, watching from the upside down view, his boyfriend fidgeting a little. “Y-Yea I’m going now…can I get a kiss?” He needed something fast before Johan made him explode. Johan pushed himself off from the ground and back to his feet in one elegant movement. He turned and grabbed Usnavi, making sure that the last thing on his mind was his jacked coffee. He planted a kiss that almost insisted Usnavi stay home inside. The kind of kiss that Usnavi was left gasping and his stomach gnawed at the walls of his insides. Johan pulled away, smirking at his handiwork. Usnavi was still half lidded, mouth still opened. Absently, Johan somewhat missed the strong, bitter coffee breath…perhaps it was the guilt but once Usnavi saw he could function without coffee it would all be worth it. “Uh..you…are very..um..” Usnavi went to accuse of Johan of trying to make him stay…but damn it was working to well. “What can I say?” Johan smiled kissing Usnavi’s unexpecting mouth again. “I miss you already. Go have a good day.” Usnavi staggered back and nodded, “…aye dios…” he breathed, feeling a jolt just by being around Johan. Perhaps he didn’t need coffee, he mused to himself.The day began and Usnavi usually felt the first kicks of coffee hit him in the morning right before Sonny stumbled in late. Instead he…felt nothing, his limbs did get progressively limper and his body felt heavier all of the sudden. Had he put on any weight? No he was still a moderately average size, his pants felt fine as did his shirt. He shook his head and started slowly sweeping, back and forth, and back…and forth. His mind started to slip in and out as he swayed to the slow, sloppy sweeping of his broom. He did this mindlessly for an hour when Sonny eventually walked in.  Sonny readying himself for his cousin’s wrath, his neck dotted in evidence where and with who he was with. “Before you say anything, I can explain I was…attacked by a very small cat on the neck and—“ He looked over at Usnavi and waited. And waited…usually Usnavi would be down his throat with scolding but instead. He was just standing there, swaying… “Usnavi?” He walked over and gently poked his cousin on the side. 

“Mmnh.” Usnavi blinked a few times but couldn’t manage to open his eyes any wider than half. He turned and looked at Sonny, a slow smile forming on his lips. “Sonny, when did you get in?” He yawned and slowly pulled his wrist to his face. He looked like someone reading the time, shame there was no watch on his bare arm. “Right on time, good..S-Sooahhh” He yawned again. Sonny arched an eyebrow and decided it was best to just…let it go since Usnavi wasn’t yelling at him. “Suuuure. Whatever you say…” Sonny took notice the rest of the day Usnavi was out of it. When rush hour came in, Usnavi couldn’t even do the simple math. He stared at the cash register for so long the line actually started to dwindle because people were leaving! Finally Sonny stepped in, pushing his zombie cousin out of the way. “Navi’ just make coffee or something.” “S-Si” He waved Sonny off, his voice drawling and dragging with sleep. Usnavi never felt so…out of it. He couldn’t seem to focus on a single thing. He started to put a pot to brew and stood there. He leaned up against the counter and felt gravity betray him and his body gave out. He slumped over the counter and groaned, unable to so much lift his head up. It was though a cinderblock was dropped on him. His eyes fluttered close for a second. “USNAVI” Sonny’s yell brought him to his feet. “H-Huh?” He wiped his head around back and forth, trying to find Sonny. He turned his head and noticed Sonny had been behind him and was holding  up a kettle of hot water. “Why are you boilin’ water, Sonny?” “Me?!” Sonny glared, stressed from manning both the counter and now Usnavi. “I told you we needed coffee and you made it, just minus the coffee!” All Usnavi made was hot water. “Oh..wow…”

Sonny shot a worried look to his cousin. “You ok, man?” This was so far from Usnavi’s regular that now Sonny was starting to worry for real. “Bro…maybe you should take five?” “Yeah…yeah…” Usnavi took off his hat and rubbed his hair. “I’ll go sit…” He stumbled to the backroom. He took a seat and started going down the check list of things he had stocked up. He started checking off product by product. His head bobbing with each check, until slowly…his world went dark. “Seriously he’s been buggin’ all day. I’m worried” “Nina, what do you think?” “I don’t know I’ve never seen him like this…” “Oh god should we call 911??” “No one is calling 911” Benny hissed then gently a large hand came down on Usnavi’s shoulder and shook him gently. “Hey…hey Usnavi…” Benny spoke gently. Usnavi opened his eyes and looked around, his vision blurrier than usual he made out the faces of Sonny, Nina, and Benny all around him. “Que? Que fue?” (What? What’s up/going on?). He looked down at the clipboard and found his checks were all over the place, not even in the designated boxes for the items. He squinted a bit and groaned, his head felt heavy, everything felt bogged down by some invisible force. Even his thinking was hazy.

“You’re really out of it…” Benny shook his head. “I think you’re sick, Navi” Nina spoke softly, “you should go home and rest…Sonny will handle the store and Benny and I can help.” She offered, though Benny grunted a bit. They had a date planned and the date was not to be cooped up at the bodega with Sonny. Still, Usnavi looked so weakened, even his posture seemed to be smaller, curling into himself like a helpless animal. “Sick…yeah…” He muttered, this was the worst. He lost customers; he failed at brewing coffee, now he was being kicked out of his own store. This was the worse sick he ever felt. It wasn’t a stuffy nose with aches and a fever. This was just a hollow sluggish feeling, a mild ache in his mind, a loss of total interest in everything. Was he… “…I’ll go home now…” He muttered slowly getting to his feet. He swayed at bit even stumbled after only taking two steps forward. He felt like he was walking on stilts. One wrong step and everything would tip over. One foot after the other, slow and steady Usnavi made it to his apartment. He tried the key but missed the hole repeatedly, then started to knock using his face as the door knocker. “Opeeeeen” he yawned. Slowly the door opened and Johan was right there to catch Usnavi after he placed all his weight on the door. “Jo…Jo…” he muttered finding some solace in strong, support beam like arms holding him up. “Shh…I-I’m here…” Johan whispered, spent the whole day ignoring the guilt telling himself this was a good healthy thing he was doing. But Usnavi looked so…miserable. He dragged his boyfriend to the couch and sat him down, only to have Usnavi flop over his lap and shiver. “What happened? Why are you home so soon?” “My head hurts, my eyes can’t stay open…my arms and legs feel like jello…” He mumbled, his voice yawning and cracking between every few words. “A-And I can’t even man the store…” He pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes as if trying to press his eyeballs back into his sockets. “My stomach feels funny…ugh…” “…I see…” Johan gulped stroking Usnavi’s head. “Johan…” He mumbled, “I think I’m really sick…I…” His lower lip trembled; he never felt anything like this. He felt like his body was literally going to give out any second. “I’m sick…” Usnavi admitted in a soft and tender voice. The pitiful sound of his pathetic admission sent Johan over the edge. Usnavi would never admit to illness unless it was closer to life and death. “…M-My darling…love…of my …life you’re not siiiiick…” Johan smiled, worry gripping at him but he couldn’t take Usnavi looking like this. “I…I…might have…swapped-out-your-coffee-and-given-you-decaf-instead” He spoke in one long chain. There was a pause, a long one, before Usnavi slowly peeled his hands off his eyes. His lips pulled into a sleepy frown.

“Oh.” Usnavi muttered nodding, suddenly his bag framed eyes glared up at Johan with so much emptiness Johan thought he was up to be murdered. “…you are…in so much trouble, amor.” He closed his eyes and sighed. “so much trouble…” He sighed, “hombre de la mierda…” (piece of shit*slang informal)