#idk anymore tbh! time crazy but anyway i will do my best fr. with everything. gah

[astrxealis]

my dad just played a bit of Nothing Else Matters just now on guitar he's so cool

[i-just-want-to-destroy]

Would love to hear your thoughts on gintama the final, if you want to share!!

Fucked me up. Punched me in the face. Obliterated me.

CW GINTAMA SPOILERS

I spent my middle-high school years reading/watching gintama n its a huge influence on me—it probably has the most influence on me compared to other animanga tbh—storytelling and humor wise this series just engineered me lol. Its also the first fandom i was active in, this was literally a gintama blog to whoever remembered that era.

When gin said this^ i was bout to cry fr -_- when i saw kagura looking all grown up in this movie i was like 🧍‍♂️so SHOCKED bc pretty sure i was kaguras age when i started gintama. so looking at adult her as an adult myself… insane meta moment. Like u know how uncle iroh is everyones uncle, gintoki u are my father

Anyway. takasugi

Takasugi’s redemption arc is so fucking crazy. Idc how tropey everything is bc it was done so well. Maybe im biased but it doesnt matter. The storyboarding in the gintoki vs utsuro/takasugis fight was done SO WELL. !! The sound design also! They translated n elevated the scene insanely well from the manga. The interpersing flashbacks and mutliple callbacks with the present fight uogoggh. THE SILENT MOMENTS!!! the staff knew what they were doing. It was so devastating. The script is also very crazy like…. Everything they told each other at their last moments together…… I think it was done perfectly. It was a perfect, most miserable moment.

His iconic catchphrase..

I actually did not think i would like takasugi this much (funny since i got my url from him lol) but like. I always thought takasugi n gin’s dynamic is rly good in a rly fucked up way but idk i was not obsessed w him the way im obsessed w the other characters. But now. Oh man. WHAT a character. Yeah its a cliche to die to get your character redeemed but goddamn he did it SO WELL. SO WELL! He didnt turn nice a la zuko or whatever, but the script rly allowed us to see the best of him despite everything he has done. Or in spite of it. Like his character rly, rly just shines through. I feel like the first time he showed up as a villain his motivation felt vague and chaotic—violence for violence’s sake—but now we know its nothing like that at all. Its vengeance, but it isnt vengeance for him, its vengeance for the three of them: gintoki, zura, n himself. When i realized his want to “destroy” isnt egocentric in the least… [shakes head] his character just changed completely to my eyes its sooo. CRAZY. WHAT a character.

my fav character dynamic is enemies who know each other best. Obsessed with it truly. and also characters who try to kill each other (which is takasugi+gintoki in the past arcs of the series) out of love. Bc it is out of love! Out of guilt and pride and really love. The way that we thought takasugi’s pain centers fully around their teacher—and it turns out what tortures him the most is gintoki’s suffering all along?!?! WTF. And the way they mirror each other! Its fucking insane! Gin chose to sacrifice himself in the past to carry the burden at the beginning of it all VS the series ending with takasugi sacrificing himself bc he doesnt want gin to carry that burden anymore -> literal insanity. Yes character death is tedious but its the perfect conclusion to their conflict. Full fucking circle. Im frothing at the mouth thinking about it. Its such a tender end for the both of them it was beautiful and it hurt like shit.

If there is anything i have gripes about the movie is the lack of zura and sakamotos involvement at the core of their conflict—esp zura! Bc shoyou is his teacher too ): and also the poor character screentime distribution for the rest of the cast (it cant be helped on some level ig, gintama has a shitload of characters) though i appreciate that otae has a lot of scenes, good for her :)

But overall i loved it—very biasedly, but i really do. I mean it hurt but it hurt so good. Im happy that it ended that way. Bittersweet and hopeful and in good, good humor is the very essence of gintama and that was the ending that it got, so: perfect. And therefore i will think abt gintama fondly onwards as i always have

[rockinem777]

Is this isn't even 30% of my life's fucking tragity & I still have the heart to do good for people and love like y'all are bitch made fr

I have been through so much fucking bullshit and deception and straight betrayals are an understatement to everything I have been through. I've lost my best friend. I have walked away from people I loved. I have let a grown man take advantage of everything in me he could and leave me with nothing but hate for myself. My best friend in high school wrote the first statement on me. My fiance in West Virginia has given up on me. I have never met anyone as solid as me. My best friend Kat Lynn fucking dumb fake ass bitch. She's causes a world of problems. Never did I once say a bad thing about her. My parents know I'm dying. They don't give a fuck. My dog is dying. Like lemme make it real fucking clear for you who doesn't seem to know who the fuck I am and wtf I've been through. I got my TBI cause I jumped out of a car cause the mfer told me I wouldn't. Well let me make it more realistic. My first love and I were fighting and his dad made me go home. In the car I wanted to jump out. He said I wouldn't and long story short I opened the door and the brakes through me out the door 55Mph I landed on my skull. I was unconscious for 9 days. I had to learn how to talk again. Like all for that first love of mine to leave as soon as I got out the hospital. All I had to talk to was myself. And that's just the beginning. I was suicidal then I'm suicidal now. I've lost every friend on my way here because they're fake liars back stabbers ect. My only friend Melanie Wade is who I could talk to. I used to watch her son and talk to her for days. She really understand me. She got shot in the head years ago. She was like my second mom. I talked and seen her more than my real mom. I ain't been the same since. My GMA and GPA knew I was gonna be homeless or kicked out of something when I was 16. They didn't let me stay at their house. Neither did my brother. The amount of times I've been beaten and thrown out this fucking house is an ungodly sin. And I don't want your fucking pity. The only reason I get to stay here now is cause I gave my mom a 75 thousand dollar check which I get 100 dollars a week of which she Hates to come up off of. which if I would have kept I bet you money id be dead. Ive moved out on my own with bfs and to drug houses like 5 times. 7th Street. Port republic. 10th St shout out to that nigga that gave me this fucking MRSA Gary lmao (this was the first house I was 16) scottsville. Norfolk. Like my first bf that was a mess. 4 years down the drain. IDK EHAT LOVE IS. 2nd bf my best friend at the time for years the only reason I dated that mfer is cause he would beg me for years so I figured id try. He ended up abusive. He ended up crazy. I ended up running out his house bleeding from stepping on the broken glass omw out walking from 7th to 250 near step-n-out. No phone. I got home cause that mfer came and got me and took me home no let him cause he promised I could go home. He used to refuse to let me leave. Throw me back into the house into the bedroom. Me and his son ooo malakii used to sleep and cuddle and rainy nights were the best with that amazing 5year old boy. Not that I know him anymore but whatever. Then we got that last one lmao wtf happened with that. Like fuck my life he told me I would see that none ofbthose mfers gaf about me and I guess I wanted to prove him wrong about a couple months ago when I lost all hope and I've became manically depressed I got a lisence plate that said, "told ya" like thanks. Soooo let's begiin on me being claimed by the KKK and forever fucking slave to some one or guy idk how it works tbh. Better than being sex trafficed right? I guess so. Like Garrette bar was the funniest and most loyal friend you could ask for and its a damn fucking shame he took his life over that fucking dumb whore cause she's the definition of vindictive and spiteful and evil. Hell yeah I love live blah blah blah loves you dillan I miss you. I should've ditched and went to hburg that nughtbeih you. Instead I've been having my hair pulled and legit hit and smacked around and screamed at by this mistake of a ex boyfriend John micheal which this should have been awarded with best human pickier me. Cause obviously I know how to pick the worse fucking ones cause up until today. I thought he loved me. I thought I could make it work. And tbh it was my last hope. He was my last hope and here we fucking are and fr I took 50 sleeping pills the other night and novlie he walked out on me and was clueless until he was dragging me around me bed by my hair and head calling me a bitch 2 days later for asking him "what he problem was now" in my sleep but he legit says I deserve it. He's called me a bitch twice today and oh yeah he pushed me off my bed into my closet which I like flew but anyway I smacked my head on the closet. And he watched me lay there for about an hour holding my head not saying a word. While he just got rude and acted like a douche. But then he picked me up off the floor and left me on the bed to tell me he was gonna leave me. Then I was ignoring him of course idk what to say cause obviously after forcing my hands off my ears while he screamed hateful shit into my ears 2xs he still grabbed me by my head and hair on my bed after throwing me ect and called me a bitch and told me about how his cousin is gonna come get him. So long story short I'm not trying to fix shit and he's laying on my floor saying he don't want me and blah blah blah long story short I wish I never fucking met the guy he popped my cherry. I hate myself for letting him docthisnto me if I could go back in time and never meet him. I would. I hate him. Up until today I swear I loved this mfer so much. Like I thought it was meant to be. Like omg if you don't want to be here anymore 😭 but I wish I was dead. But yeah but fr the way I let him treat me is disgraceful and I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for allowing it and like I'm not sure if that isn't the only reason I stayed this long like I was trying to vouch for myself for chasing after a man 2xs my age who was clearly just getting more abusive and mean and shamelessly more selfish by the day. Anyway I don't know what you think of me and I don't give a fuck honestly cause your fucking retarded if you don't know who the fuck has put in so much work and gave up so much fucking of my entire fucking life for the credit and adoration I receive. And no I don't ever remember the bad times. I have so many compressed memories. Like dude getting teeth taken out and getting brutally beat up and bitten and raped like and almost trafficed but I escaped. Like but fr I don't have a bone in my fucking body that has I'll intent for anyone. Always look for the helpful way. Always help who needs to be helped. Always there for people. I'm a good fucking person. Probably better than you. And I'm no longer interested in the position I think I had. I give people clothes and feed them and take care of who needs it. I'm a 100% spectacular human being and I'd be a jealous fucking asshole too if I had half the fucking mind to be as cruel hateful mean and selfish as almost everyone else around me seems to have.