#idk ! im not trying to sound like im sidelining everything for the ever so popular superbat.

[superel]

hmm...

[like-sands-of-time]

so this is something I sorta come to terms with in every fandom im in with a closeted ship but it's literally always relevant, and always kinda weird to think about as a stan but it's still so so important to mention...

as shippers it doesn't matter how much we love them, how loyal we are to them as individuals and as a couple, our #1 needs to be their happiness not ours. what I mean by that so this doesn't sound wayyy out of context is if they don't wanna ever come out, if they just don't want/feel they can't/etc. to come out now but maybe they might change their mind, if they feel pressured either by themselves, by those around them, or even by hollywood in general to make choices regarding pr relationships that they look absolutely miserable in then all we can do is support them. sure you can leave the fandom any time you want, there's no contract or obligation or anything but if you can see past the fact that they're not living out their lives the way you want them and the way they feel they need to(and let's just think about it, how content do you think your idols actually are that they even think they have to do something like that because they're worried what their fans might think, what directors, costars etc. might think, how their career might not make it very far because Hollywood is so fake progressive about things) im sure you can see that that choice doesn't make them any happier ultimately. maybe it was an obligation one made for a project. or maybe their teams both were like hey we should do a mutually beneficial pr relationship.. IDK and we won't ever 100% know cos we're not in the meeting rooms w them.

ANYWAY I got sidetracked a bit. the point of this whole thing is yeah you can get frustrated with them, I'm sure they're very frustrated with the choices they make too at times, but that doesn't change their values or who they are, that doesn't mean they're a liar and everything they might have said about political, religious, personal, etc. views is a lie bc this one part of Hollywood that absolutely sucks.

just.. realize that you're not always gonna be 100% happy with the person you stan or the ship you like because they're real ppl who have to make decisions that have more reasons behind them than we could possibly begin to speculate given we don't actually know everything. our whole blogs are dedicated to summarizing what we see and what we think it means based on other ships, based on them, and based on how much we respect them honestly cos some of you guys assume the absolute worst of your idols when any sort of headline or anything appears.

just, remember that they make mistakes just like you, except their entire lives are blown up so people like you who make proportional mistakes can analyze literally everything and make assumptions about them based on those choices, those .001 second flashes to get picture perfect moments.

also I saw this in someone else's post so im not trying to steal but it was really accurate imo.. specifically regarding this fandom, charmie: Timmy's motivation to do this stuff isn't for the attention or fame, that much seems crystal clear to me. he embraces the awkwardness and sort of self deprication that's very real for our generation. he embraces the fact that he is who he is, I don't think he's ever thought he was that cool popular guy, nor do I think he wants to be. he seems far too introspective and wise for his age to get too close to that kind of thing.

Timmy's motivation is more to not be the minor/side role his whole career. he loves what he does, he doesn't care what genre the movie is, what work he has to put into himself physically or mentally bc he likes the challenge.(he's said all of that). he just wants to be the lead role imo. he wants to be a main actor not stuck on the sidelines or forgotten about and there's nothing wrong with that. ESPECIALLY because he truly does have the talent, the dedication and hard work, the love of what he does to bring all his characters to life even if they are the farthest thing from his irl personality. he seems to make friends with everyone he works with, seems genuinely happy to be where he is even if he's really nervous.

unfortunately for that goal you have to be seen a certain way and Timmy is not some buff, masculine, manly dude bro guy. I'm pretty sure from the beginning of cmbyn promo there has been name calling about his sexuality based on his body type/looks and it's absolutely not cool but yet nothing really new.. that type of "based on what you look like you must be like x" is what drives so much of that industry to work out and diet til their unhealthy, to change their personalities to seem more likeable, etc.

I really hope with the roles he's done so far it's enough to show that you don't have to be that guy to be lead material but i genuinely don't know... I don't think it's something he even wants to do long term, he seems v happy to have a close honest relationship with fans no matter where in the world he goes and he doesn't seem to be losing his love for his job and anywhere it takes him so if The King and Dune go well let's hope he's allowed more freedom to be who he truly is bts.

I really dont think he's some manipulative guy and I never have been one to change lots of ppls opinions but honestly I'm not a hardcore stan. I saw the movie (cmbyn) and gushed a bit for a little bit in the beginning of 2018 but ive literally only just come back bc I saw he was doing some more cool stuff.

I've been in fandoms where the two ppl in the ship haven't even been seen together in years, everytime fans comment about the things they say or how close they might be there's an article about how they hate each other. ive seen ppl I stan struggle to get respect in such a tough/unfeeling industry with their hard work and fear being honest and sabotaging their hard work. it's a real thing and almost any now-out actor/musician/etc. that I've seen talk about it talks about just how traumatic it truly is. even if you aren't internally homophobic, even if you were cool with yourself and your life before, anxiety, self doubt and the fear of judgement and career sabotage seriously messes w artists. i don't know that everyone out there is as strong-willed as we think we are.

THATS ALL I HAVE TO SAY FOR NOW sorry for rambling and pls bring on the comments about how dumb and ignorant I am it's really great seeing how ppl handle differences in opinion. (: