#idek if its still able to be picked up now bc i have no idea how company shutdowns work

[disastercit]

all 52 camp camp fans have spoken

[heyitsyn]

Prince Iwa-Chan

Oikawa!Sister x Iwaizumi Hajime

a/n: it aggravates me that my mans bara-arms-iwa-chan is so UNDERRATED!!!!

requests open!!

like look mom, im in love

ofc youre an oikawa

tbh, i dont think iwa wouldve been comfortable w you when yall first met

lets say youre a year younger than tooru

its a well-known fact that theyve been friends since they were really young so you, being oiks’ baby sister, was also part of your little trio

like lets say they met when they were 6

that would make you about 5

since yall have an older sister, you were exposed to the girly girl stuff like dolls and princesses

ngl, tooru was too thats why hes so flamboyant

but seems his fashion style refutes that

ya didnt hear that from me

anyways

tooru had already developed a deep fascination w volleyball bc he saw it being played during the 2000 summer olympics

but you remained w your sister and continued letting her treat you like a princess

im not really sure how old his sister is but lets say she was about around middle school when you were 5-6

however, tooru still made you play w him even though you didnt know how but you didnt care bc you were close w your brother so you would play ball w him

then came along iwaizumi hajime that tooru met from school

he found out that this boy also liked volleyball and tooru yeeted them both home so they could go and play at the back yard

you peeked from your window and you just thought iwa was the most handsome boy youve ever met

ofc, you just bolted down the stairs to where your brother and his friend was

oiks saw you standing by the door w a red face and him, being still a child and not understanding crushes, thought you were sick

he went to you and beckoned hajime to follow him inside

tooru sat you down and asked if you were okay but you just kept staring at hajime

he figured that you were just confused as to who this person was

‘oh! iwa-chan! this is my little sister, y/n! y/n, this is my classmate, iwaizumi hajime!’

cue iwa hitting him at the head

‘i can introduce myself perfectly fine, bakakawa!’

iwaizumi hajime,,,

iwaizumi hajimeee,

iwaizumi y/n

that thought made you turn even redder and you squealed in embarrassment before running back to your room

lmao what

if your personality doesnt align w this, i deeply apologize

i just think if you were an oikawa, you would bound to immediately also be drawn to this handsome specimen named iwaizumi hajime

he be getting the oikawas though

iwa was actually concerned but oiks waved it off

‘don’t worry, iwa-chan. shes weird like that. lets go toss the ball!’

so that was kinda how he met you

now, since hajime basically lived in your house by how much him and your brother hung out, youve slowly mellowed out and gotten to be friends w him

despite your hatred w bugs, you still went w them to explore just bc you wanted to be around hajime

lmao tooru youre now irrelevant

hajime didnt mind and he always made sure you were okay with the adventures of the day

even though you were only like a year younger, he cant help but baby you bc of your much smaller height than him and overall cute baby face

one day, they both came home from school all sweaty bc they raced home

‘iwa-chan! you can settle in the living room while i go shower!’

‘don’t call me iwa-chan, bakakawa!’

‘then stop calling me that!’

he sat down on the couch and started doing his homework when he heard you come home from school

lmao how do little japanese kids go back and forth from school to home at the age of 6

idek how to cross the street

‘tadaima’

‘oh, okaeri, y/n’

you perked up at his voice and you ran to the living room, seeing him

‘iwa-chan!’

he grunted and you threw yourself to him in a hug

if your personality doesnt align w this, i deeply apologize

i just think if you were an oikawa, you would bound to immediately also be drawn to this handsome specimen named iwaizumi hajime

part 2

tbh it doesnt even faze him anymore since you do this to him every time

he continues doing homework and just wraps one arm around you and starts patting your head

‘tooru-nii?’

‘shower’

‘okay’

then silence

but its the good kind of silence

you and iwa just sit there with you snuggled up on him while he continues to add numbers

then it was ruined

by the pterodactyl oikawa tooru who comes flying down the stairs and glomps on to iwa’s other side

‘y/n-chan! stop hogging iwa-chan!’

‘he’s mine, tooru-nii!!’

you pout while iwa turns and gives him a glare

‘shut up, bakakawa! and stop calling me that!’

‘aahh!! you were mine first, iwa-chan!’

‘i was never yours! be quiet!’

‘itai, iwa-chan!’

‘he’s mine forever! we’re going to get married so butt out, nii-chan!’

‘HAH?!’

once everything calms down, yall actually start your homework and work

‘anything happen today, y/n-chan?’

oikawa always asked that question bc he believes its his duty as older brother to be caught up in your life

thats actually annoying bruv

‘hmm, me and the girls in my class were playing princess tea party today and a boy asked to be my prince.’

‘WHAT!’

oikawa is 7 now and he faintly has an idea about crushes and his father made him promise that he would protect you from nasty boys

‘calm down, bakakawa’

iwa mumbled, continuing his homework but also paying attention

‘WHAT!? NO! WHATD YOU SAY, Y/N-CHAN! YOUR BROTHER IS THE ONLY PRINCE YOU NEED!’

‘i told him i already have a prince’

oikawa was so smug and crossed his arms

‘hm, serves them right-’

‘prince iwa-chan and i are going to get married and live in a castle so there’s no room for anybody else’

iwa had to double check and turned red really fast

like who was this iwa-chan

wait, what his name?

his name has iwa in it

is he iwa-chan?

y/n’s prince iwa-chan?

was he really iwa-chan?

‘NO! YOUR NII-SAN IS YOUR PRINCE! IWA-CHAN CAN BE YOUR KNIGHT OR SOMETHING! BUT IM YOUR PRINCE!’

you glared at tooru and shook your head

‘no. iwa-chan is my prince’

you were so shamless about this fact

lmao i want your confidence

from then on, youve called iwa as your prince

like his name on your phone is literally prince iwa-chan

then when you were in middle school, you’ve started calling iwa as haji-senpai

there wasnt even a large event that spawned this

well,,, actually,,

youve noticed that iwa hated the nickname ‘iwa-chan’ a lot and he hit tooru many times bc of it so you stopped calling him that bc you didnt want him to be mad at you

so you started calling him senpai bc he was technically an upperclassman

when you first called him this, iwa was lowkey shook

‘haji,,,, senpai?’

you nodded from your spot on the couch, not looking up from your homework

‘see? i can only call iwa-chan, iwa-chan! OOF!’

that was iwa hitting tooru at the face with his pencil case

‘y/n, you dont have to call me that. we’ve known each other since we were little so you dont have to call me by an upperclassman term’

you shrugged

‘i know. but you dont like it when you’re called iwa-chan, do you?’

‘not if it’s by this trash’

he jutted a thumb to the fallen tooru

‘so,,,, iwa-chan is fine?’

your eyes sparkled at the permission of being able to freely call him that without worry

he gulps at your face and turns away to hide his red face before nodding

‘my prince iwa-chan!’

‘no! my iwa-chan!’

‘shut up shittykawa!’

‘itai, iwa-chan!’

keeping up with the oikawas

this nickname will forever be stuck

since you went to the same middle school, you were known to be around your brother and iwa and even staying behind for practice to walk home w them

it became a bit of a joke to the team of you picking up your prince

one day, a teammate called iwa, ‘prince iwa-chan’ and he almost busted a fuse

was ready to square up bc only his babie can call him that

but when you came through the door

‘prince iwa-chan! your princess is here!’

he turned all soft and squishy and pats your head so gently that they couldnt believe this is the same boy who is the ace

you were interested in volleyball so you were kinda friends w the team but you didnt really care for the sport, mainly focusing on your academics

thats how it really was for you three

they focused on sports while you studied

oh my here comes highschool

oikawa and iwa were already known throughout the FREAKING PREFECTURE bc of how TALENTED THEY ARE AT VOLLEYBALL

and you were already known by your pretty face and your cute personality

basically genderbent oikawa

and just wanted to stop you from reading by telling you that you are beautiful and you are a KWEEN and you are a GODDESS and confidence is the most beautiful thing to wear and best of all, it’s free!!

ofc, youd have to go to aoba johsai bc your brother was there

‘y/n-chan! you need to go where your brother is! you love him, don’t you?’

‘sure, tooru’

you actually went to seijoh bc you would see iwa 

you didnt hear that from me

your first day, boys (and gals) were already flocking towards you when they saw you walking with iwa and tooru

still being the overprotective brother since day1, oikawa was just snarling at anyone getting close to his baby sister

lmao what baby

hes only like a year older

but iwa was being terrirorial protective bc he finds it as an obligation as tooru’s best friend and your childhood friend

when oiks wasn’t paying attention and being drowned by his fangirls, iwa was your bodyguard

there was this one boy who started walking towards you as yall were going to your class but hajime placed an arm around your waist and pulled you closer

‘oh? i’m only at the first floor, iwa-chan. don’t get all clingy now’

lmao, girl hes trying to show that boy that hes your unofficial mans and will cut off his family jewels if he tries to even BREATHE in your direction

umm,,, iwa’s not yandere in this one yall

iwa just rolls his eyes and makes you walk forward until yall are at your door

‘i’ll see you later, iwa-chan!’

‘yea yea. i’ll pick you up’

he starts to walk down the hallway but you poke your head back out and shout

‘i miss you already, prince iwa-chan!’

he turns red all over and freezes for a 0.0002 seconds before raising a hand without turning around

now ladies and genitals

this is when iwa-chan starts to catch feelings like he catches them spikes

your cute smling face and saying his dumb nickname that he actually loves was like a recipe for a stroke for him

it has come to the point at the mere thought of you would make him all flustered and red

it tripled over when this happened:

puberty was kinda late for you and you actually just woke up looking like a goddess one day and you were like, lmao what

your chest just ballooned up and your height just skyrocketed that your skirt was now very short

ew i dont know what i would do in this situation

you were self-conscious about this and was kinda scared 

obvs, you would scream for your mother and she and your father and brother bolts up to your bedroom thinking there was a whole michael meyers in your room

but when you explained that your uniform doesnt fit anymore, she starts making appointments to get you fitted for another one

but you had to wait for a few days

so you went to school looking like a whole snacc

more of a snacc than you did before

when iwa saw you, he had a literal nosebleed in the middle of campus and runs to the bathroom to get all cleaned up

why in the name of asahi do you look like that?!

when you saw your prince look at you in horror and run away, you cried

you were already very self-conscious and him doing that just topped the cake

cake that tooru doesnt have

oop imsorry

tooru reassures you that he had a nosebleed and he was just sick and ran to not get any blood on his clothes

but you just walked away with your head down low

it didnt matter to you if this caught all the student body’s attention

that their precious oikawa y/n, little sister of the oikawa tooru, was a walking perfection goddess Venus

all that you cared about was iwa’s opinions bc he was your prince and your best friend

girl, accept that you actually like the mans

this was the worst day of your entire life and you went straight to your locker to get your gym clothes out and wear it for the day

it was tight but at least it covered skin

and it still attracted enough attention to be catcalled and whistled at

it felt violating

the entire morning, there was more attention and more people flocked over to you and guys were staring at you as if you were a piece of meat, not a girl

‘harry potter is a boy! not a piece of meat!’

sorry i cant help it

you were so uncomfortable that you called your brother during lunch time to come pick you up for lunch bc you were too scared to walk alone after being catcalled during your walk to your class

tooru sends out iwa to go help you as an apology from this morning and he just runs to your class bc you were in trouble and he was going to protect you!!

go iwa-chan!

he finds you sitting on your chair, looking down at your desk as there seemed to be boys piled up on top of each other, trying to get your attention

first world problems, amirite

‘OI!’

that angry grunt but at 2x bass boosted

hearing his voice, you were still embarrassed from earlier but you were so relieved

‘iwa-chan!’

iwa pushes people away and he grabs your hand to pull you up before wrapping an arm around your waist, protectively

‘if i see you idiots making her uncomfortable or even trying to touch her, i will destroy you’

protection and the feeling of safety is my fave

he leads you out of there to the stairway where him and his teammates were eating

he held your hand tightly and you squeezed it, trying to show that you were grateful

even if they were still male, your brother was there and if something happened, they were both strong enough to take them on

besides, its just mattsun and maki anyways

tooru saw you and he hugged you before leading you to the 2 others

‘guys, this is y/n, my sister. that’s mattsun and that’s makki.’

you slightly smiled and raised a hand in greeting

‘yo’

‘hello’

to be safe, iwa made you sit a step down from him so that if something happens, he could protect you

idk how but you do you boo

‘i can protect her too, iwa-chan!’

‘shut up, shittykawa. youre literally sticks and bones’

‘so mean! iwa-chan, you’re so mean!’

you giggled, head leaning down to rest on iwa’s right thigh since you were full and tired and he runs his hand through your hair

mattsun and makki shared a look before asking

‘are you dating our ace, y/n-chan?’

at the mention of dating, you both turned red and you sat up

‘OF COURSE NOT, MATTSUN, MAKKI!’

iwa shouts but his red face and ears betrayed him

‘iwa-chan grew up with us so he’s naturally like that. we’ve adopted him into our family!’

oikawa explained but you looked at him and he gave you a knowing look

oh he noticed everything

the lingering looks during practice

the bashful smiles during hang outs at home

unnecessary touches during the walk to school

oikawa may be annoying but he’s observant and he is smart

after that fiasco, the two boys were a little wary of letting you walk home alone so iwa offered to take you since he was already making more progress and didnt need extra practice while tooru wanted to practice more

‘iwa-chan, can we go to your house this time?’

he turned to look at you curiously since you never ask to go to his place

‘i miss your mom and ive been meaning to go visit her. so can we, iwa-chan?’

you squeezed his hand and showcased your pleading look making him agree

‘fine’

his house wasn’t a frequently hung out spot since your house was closer but you were still familiar with his home since his mother was fond of you

‘tadaima’

mama iwaizumi peaked from the kitchen and greeted him home before squealing at the sight of the youngest oikawa

‘oh my, y/n-chan! hello!’

‘hello, auntie!’ 

she gave you a big hug and you returned it with a laugh

iwa just standing there to the side with a smile bc his mom approves so all is good in life

‘you’ve grown so much, y/n-chan! so much prettier too!’ you turned bashful at her compliments.

then she leaned forward to whisper in your ear but made her voice loud

‘say, has my son finally ask you to be his girlfriend?’

omg mama iwaizumi really ships it

iwa turns red and complains to his mom about being in his business too much

‘don’t be so timid, hajime! y/n-chan could be taken from under your nose any minute now!’

‘dont you think i know that’ he mumbles but very lowly so that no one hears him

but you decide to tease him more

‘no. but i’m waiting for it. i’ll tell you once he does, auntie!’

fed up with the teasing, he grabs you and drags you up to his room to change into comfortable clothing

you sit on his bed while he rummages through his closet for a sweatshirt and sweatpants

‘here! change into these!’ he shouts, still flustered and refusing to look at your eyes

youre an oikawa and you lived to tease so you stood up, tossing the clothes to the side and wrapping your arms around his neck

ooo gurl you want iwa to die today, don’t you?

he gets even redder and scowls

‘oi, y/n, what are you doing’

you shook your head

‘nothing. i just miss my prince iwa-chan. you were so brave for saving me today, prince iwa-chan’

the nickname used to not affect him that much but now, he watches the it fall from your cherry lips

‘say my name’

you furrowed your eyebrows

‘iwa-chan?’

he gently shakes his head no

‘my real name’

‘iwaizumi hajime’

you say, distracted at the way his mouth moves

‘and what’s yours?’

‘iwaizumi y/n’

you breathed out

he growls softly before taking your sinful lips

wowza jesus took the wheel bc he stepped on that pedal

we going straight 100 mph up in this bih

iwa really said, ‘skip the confession. imma go straight for my babie girl’s lips. also, proposal who? let’s go get married in vegas!’

it wasnt even been literally 15 minutes until you came bounding the stairs wearing hajime’s signature grey hoodie with his seijoh sweatpants and calling for your auntie to announce you were now dating are going to get married

‘WHAT!?’ 

she screams and comes running from the kitchen, holding a ladle

you flashed a grin while iwa shows a small smile with red cheeks from behind you before telling you that you were both too young to get married

‘i told ya you would be the first to know’

after dinner, you call your brother and hes like, ‘okay, since you’re not at home i’m assuming youre at iwa’s’

‘omgomgomg, nii-chan! i just had dinner with my boyfriend’s family! they accepted me!’

‘BOYFRIEND?! DOES IWA-CHAN KNOW!? HOW COULD YOU BREAK HIS HEART?!’

oikawa just has that special type of voice that even without being on speaker phone, it sounds like he is

iwa laughs at his friend’s worried questions

‘better hand over your princess to the prince, grand king’

oikawa screamed

i hope i did my mans justice 

[hongism]

hi caly boo its ur 🌊 anon! i finally finished the most brilliant darkness and oh my lawd i’m in spain without the s. to put it shortly: U DID NOT DISAPPOINT BESTIE, and it seems unreal that u and ur mind and this fic even exists bc every moment is just polished to perfection, while simultaneously every character is polished to a sort of imperfect perfection(?). i have so many questions and things to say idek where to start, and tho im not good with words and even worse at deciphering hidden meanings, here are just some of my thoughts that i remember from the story.

hello my dear!!! eee im gonna answer separately since i think i’ll be very long-winded as usual but first of all thank you so much :(( this fic is actually very full of subliminal messages and hidden nuances that are weaved throughout which i think could be quite confusing so i apologize for that! if i had managed my time better, i would have adjusted when i started the fic to account for managing those aspects of the fic but alas i’m terrible at time management and i suck so. anyways.

first of all, ngl halfway into the story i lowkey forgot this was a wooyoung fic bc SANNN and also bc wooyoung appeared like 3 times lol. even after it finishing all that, i still had my doubts as to why this is a wooyoung fic, or more like why is san this significant in a wooyoung fic. im still a bit slow on these pls forgive me and im just curious why u made it like that.

i think yeah the most interesting thing about this fic is the emphasis on san over wooyoung. and when looking over it yeah i could have switched san and wooyoung’s characters and called it a day, but wooyoung really in my mind acts as the integral turning point for decisions made in the story. 

the goal with the fic wasn’t really to be hyperfocused on the pairing itself, but rather the emotions and thought processes of each character (aside from wooyoung). wooyoung was kept intentionally mysterious and a bit set apart from the rest of the fic because his role in story was moreso an abstract of hestia, the goddess of the hearth and home. wooyoung’s character appeared in times where y/n was struggling with the thought of home or adjusting to the new changes in her life! wooyoung’s pairing itself was actually intended to be solely platonic at first, but as the story went on i thought having mc develop feelings for him added another turning point in the fic!

moving on, the second biggest question i had is the whole hestia!wooyoung and cafe aurora situation. i did a bit of reading on hestia and only found out that she was the goddess of hearth, which might explain the fireplace and the kind of homey feeling to the cafe. and ‘cafe aurora not really existing to most’ part, which was already hinted at wooyoung randomly disappearing, mc never seeing the cafe before or wooyoung only bringing people he wants into it. i get that him inviting mc must suggest her significance to him, but why was he so adamant about his friends not mentioning him or the cafe to mc before that? wooyoung is quite a mysterious character i think, and given that this fic is supposed to be about him, it’s a bit odd that there’s still so many things left unknown, but its kinda cool that way nonetheless and im guessing u would also like to explain that further outside of the story too.

i think my biggest regret about this fic is the fucking summary.... i wrote that summary well before i even started writing the fic thinking it would go in that direction but it didn’t. and since this fic was for a collab, i left the summary as is because i genuinely cannot for the life of me figure out a better one. but i’m trying to figure out a better one. but i really fucking hate the current summary because it’s not at all what the fic is truly about and i hate it.

however, i don’t hate the fic itself, and the reason why i don’t is because i got to play with both my writing style and how i displayed the story. for this collab we were asked to pick a greek god and one of the seven deadly sins, and i selected hestia and sloth. and initially i had intended to have sloth be represented by the reader’s depression, and wooyoung be a more ‘real’ depiction of hestia. i shifted gears very early on in the fic but what it became is moreso abstract realizations in the characters.

san’s character is meant to be this idea of sloth, and it’s mentioned several times that he doesn’t want to move forward, he wants to go slow, he wants to stop moving so fast through life, and those things point to him being a depiction of sloth

wooyoung’s was harder to encapsulate in a more abstract way but you hit the nail on the head really with the homey feeling of the cafe. beyond that, mc talks about just naturally feeling at ease and comfortable with how things are with wooyoung and being around him, and he takes up this role of being the likeable, warm, cozy, comforting character. it all comes to a head in the last scene where he brings both y/n and san into the cafe.

and again wooyoung’s character is meant to be most mysterious and abstract, but if i had had more time to fully flesh out the fic, i think i would have liked to touch more on him. at the same time however i left it more open-ended and open to interpretation. the significance in him inviting mc in and not being mentioned by the others sooner is twofold. one; the others never really had any reason whatsoever to mention wooyoung. he was a friend outside the circle who never joined in with them when mc was around. i personally in my own friendships don’t mention friends outside the circle by name or anything, just kinda vaguely talking about them unless im certain the people know who this person is. the concept of wooyoung having to invite mc in was more nuanced and vague as well, intentionally so, but that was moreso meant to represent this idea of ‘you can’t make a home somewhere where you aren’t invited’ so y/n couldn’t fully make a home of the place she was in without being invited in and welcomed in, but again that’s something i wish i had more time to fully flesh out.

the hongjoong speech about love (and also the interaction with seonghwa after that) deserves a standing ovation of its own 👏 unfortunately, or not, im not actually going through the emotional turmoil regarding love the same way as hj or mc to be able to fully relate to his words, but the whole ‘if you dont love what u see in the mirror then u dont love it’ mentality really hit me hard, and i’d like to hang onto that when i make decisions in the future haha thank you wise caly! seonghwa and hongjoong’s story is also beautiful, and just like mc said, the more i look at it the more it hurts :’)

the hongjoong speech about love was meant to be something very jaded and specific to his worldview. it actually isn’t wholly how i view love personally, but it was a perfect description to how both he and y/n perceived the love in their own lives. mostly thanks to their own emotional turmoils. the mentality of the mirror quote is something that i think i also struggle with, which is why i included it. it’s hard to do, but even in friendships, i think it’s necessarily to stop and look at the person you were before this relationship and then the person during this relationship. if you don’t love the one you are now, then maybe it’s a sign to reflect and see the bigger picture, so that was a lil reminder to myself and i’m glad it touched you as well!!!

“do you love him, or do you love the idea of being in love with him?” - haha i see what u did there (or maybe i didnt please dont laugh at me if i didnt). its still so good everytime i see it bc i keep finding myself loving just the idea of things time and time again even when this makes total sense to me oof :/

heh yeah again with the more abstract concepts this one was more direct and ‘cliche’ but i fully wanted that cliche in the fic because i thought it suited the situation where mc was constantly struggling with a version of san that she thought she loved vs the version of san she got every time they were together

despite how enlightened she seems to be, mc still made the same choices, and i wanna smack her for it and pat her back at the same time. and maybe also bc of the fact that she feels so differently for the two men that i feel like no ending could really justify her decision, so ending in the vague is probably the best. your ending might kind of allude to someone more than the other already, and tho i still don’t think he’s the best one for her based on just my pov on love, i kinda agree with you. but again, this raises the question of, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic?

and yeah the whole knife in the chest at the end of it all is that she was still too scared to face the music so to speak. but really i would say she made the same choices up until the conversation on the balcony with san. and you’re absolutely right, the reason i chose the ending the way i did was because either way, there’s no justification. and actually although it might seems like i was alluding to someone specific, san being in the cafe at the very end was moreso to represent that as much as they fought, he still very much loved her and wanted to be loved by her. it was kinda an open casket ending there were no nails in the coffin, the choice between wooyoung and san still stands and an argument could be made for either of them! i think this is a fic that i could see myself revisiting one day with two endings - one for san, and one for wooyoung.

something i didn’t mention earlier about wooyoung’s character being left intentionally mysterious was that he was representing a new and budding love. the honeymoon phase where you’re falling for someone you don’t even really know. you are the reader aren’t meant to really know who wooyoung is because of that beyond what you read about him, so his past and such was left out intentionally to represent that idea of ‘hey wow im in love with a stranger!’ whereas san was this gritty love that’s bad for you. and there are pros and cons to each just as with anything!!

so,,,, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic? well i picked wooyoung for my collab so he was one of the main focuses of the fic regardless of which direction i took with it. as for why wooyoung wasn’t more forward, i already answered that but !!! i view it as both a wooyoung fic and a san fic. both are highlighted characters with main pairing roles!

i literally just woke up to write this and am going back to sleep ahaha so i apologize if this makes no sense. i somehow felt like i’ve read so much yet so little at the same time, maybe bc there are still so many things i havent fully made sense of, and that’s where i hope you come in and enlighten me. i still stand by my word that this fic deserves so much more recognition despite the lack of explicit smut bc of how much more you’ve explored through character building. love you caly and thank u for working so hard <3 — 🌊

no worries my beloved i hope you go back to sleep and get lots and lots of rest!! and i hope my response helps enlighten the not so clear things as well dgjdklfg but really thank you so much. it was a long fic and hard to get through at times, but as a whole, i’m proud of it and what i created, so thank you for recognizing my efforts and appreciating them 🥺

[juuheizou]

i may have went a bit overboard with choosing numbers. i just love those asks a lot. here they are: 4, 9, 13, 23, 28, 34, 36, 38, 47, 49, 51, 53, 63, 79, 83, 84, 97, 99

ash your overboard numbers are the best thing that ever happened to me dw about it tysm!!

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

i’ll drink it black/plain if i really want a caffeine fix and have nothing to put in it, but i have a big sweet tooth and i like it w sugar and/or flavored syrup, and milk is nice but not a requirement

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

yES. i love to sing. like really love it. not to be emo but music has always been therapy to me. i was in a choir too for abt 4 years, and did some talent shows/open mics, and would really love to be in a band or something someday. i sing and hum around my house all the time

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

when i got home from work and laid in my bed for almost an hour straight (i’m running on critically low spoons ok don’t judge me) peachie followed me into my room as he always does when i get home, and hopped up and sniffed/licked me as he always does when i get home, but this time he stepped up onto my torso and laid down on me and we cuddled for a long time and it was v nice  :)

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

listen to music and nap, maybe draw/write/do something creative if i have the spoons

28: sunrise or sunset?

sunset

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

i don’t really remember the stuffed animals i had when i was v young, but when i was 16 i found this cute little stuffed giraffe at a thrift store and just had to have it. it’s not called anything. i tried thinking of a name and all i ever call it is ‘my giraffe’ but its a big comfort object of mine and i keep it in my backpack in case i need something to self-soothe with. i love stuffed animals and highkey want more

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

idk probaby like... velvet acid christ or some weird edgy ebm band like that. bc i am just CHILLIN and idk what i’m doing but i still like knives and blood and stuff

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

the list would be so long if i listed all of them, so imma just pick one and rant abt it a little. it really cheeses me off when ppl question u on irrelevant, personal stuff that i don’t wanna share and they don’t need to know. idk like the guy that helped my roommate move knew me for a few minutes and was immediately asking what i did for work, how many hours do i work, am i going to school, am i planning on going to school, why am i not in school, and i’m like ‘none of ur beeswax stranger.’ stuff like that. maybe its just bc i’m a v private person irl and have always been the person ppl share things with while not knowing much abt me, so it just seems unnatural and honestly intrusive when ppl i’m not all that close to start asking me personal stuff that i don’t readily share, esp when they get all pissy that i don’t wanna tell a stranger, my landlord, my coworker, etc a bunch of stuff they don’t need to know.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

fried onions in any kind of breading. they look so crispy and delicious, then u bite into them and onions.

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

love it!! usually i’ll download the mp3s bc i’m broke, but when i can get them, i love having an album to hold and i love the little notes and lyrics inside the case and it’s just great. i haven’t bought a cd in a long time though bc money. the last cd i burned though was that ‘caress of steel’ one that i was so excited about

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

person: my mom. song: idek the name of the song or what verses are from which songs, but she played and sang patty griffin all the time so whenever i hear one of the songs of hers that i would hear so many times growing up i think of my mom

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

all of them but heathers. beetlejuice was ok. didn’t like pulp fiction but i might have liked it better if my pretentious film bro brother didn’t talk it up so much. for all it’s flaws, though, i love rocky horror and have it on dvd so i can watch it as much as i want

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

ehh i like to be able to find what i want, but my bookshelf is a mess and so is my music library and i just... don’t do anything about it. not successfully anyway

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

irl not much cute stuff happens to me, but i thought it was v sweet when my homie @nipnaap drew me a suzuya for my birthday last year!!

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

i like one-eyed doll’s album art a lot, both the drawn covers and the ones w photos. they just look super artsy and cool. sinister also has nice album art, which is not something i often say abt death metal bands, but its really well-drawn and the color schemes are cohesive and i like it. idk i like bands w kinda ugly album art lowkey, but those are the most consistent producers of album art i like.

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

i want tattoos all over my fricking body. i’m not gonna go into a tattoo shop and breathe my pathogens everywhere during a pandemic seeing as enough ppl in my area are already selfish enough to do that, but i hope to get my first one soon.

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

istp, libra, gryffindor

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

honestly i don’t have the foggiest idea lately. i’ve been kinda having a problem w any music really making me feel much. am i in a depressed spiral or do i need to listen to more music, who knows?

send me some cute asks!!

[its-love-u-asshole]

Fic Writers Week Day 1: Words Of Validation

Alright, so Day 1 is all about fic comments! Fic comments mean the world to me, and even as a reader, I strive to always leave comments on the fics I love (in fact, I have quite a few to leave after this lol). But I’ve also received a lot of amazing ones myself over the past two years, and it’s been absolutely amazing. I spent a lot of time today going through all my old comments and picking out some of my personal favorite supporters. Of course, I love everyone who has ever commented on my fics and given me encouragement, you guys rock, and I adore each and every one of you! It makes me super emotional to read all the kind and detailed reviews I’ve gotten, and I’ll never stop being in awe whenever someone tells me they enjoyed a fic of mine. Fic comments have lifted me up in good and bad times, and are my constant source of motivation for more and more fics. Thank you to everyone who continues to support my writing, as well as those who follow me on other platforms! This is going to be a long post complete with screenshots and messages to those who have really made an impact on me in the fanfiction community (in no particular order), but I feel like it’s extremely important to show these people ample appreciation. <3

Alright so first up is @brynne-lagaao <3 Wow, I have so much to say lol. K Project was the first fandom I was in when I returned to writing fanfic, and Brynne you were so damn welcoming. Your sarumi fics were some of my favorites, many of them are the reason I started to write for the pair in the first place. You commented on all my fics and they were always a joy to read, you pointed out all the details and lines that stood out to you, and I felt blessed whenever your name would pop into my inbox. You’re amazing and disciplined with everything you write, it’s an inspiration. Thank you so much for being such a great friend during my time in K project, and for writing some of the best sarumi fics ever! 

MERUUUU. @yatatsukki your comments are some of the best ever, and you’re one of the funniest and sweetest people I’ve ever met ; ; You love sarumi and kurotsuki, so I feel like I can freak out with you about my favorite ships, but not only that, you’re hilarious and a joy to talk to <3 Your comments always meant the world to me, because your sarumi fics were so gorgeous and well written. I looked up to you, and still do, because you’re an incredible writer, and you leave reviews that leave me on cloud nine for days. ILU !!!

@tatsupyon Effy! I know we don’t talk as much these days, but you’re seriously so wonderful! I loved being able to freak out about S4 with you :3 Your comments were so fun to read tbh, and I remember there was a time where you basically went through all my fics and commented on each! I was so grateful and happy, I can’t even describe it. I appreciate the effort you put into your reviews, and I love you for it <3 

Ahhh I don’t think this wonderful person has a tumblr, but they’re still amazing af! When I was writing SIMS, my longest sarumi multichapter, they commented on every chapter and kept my motivation going even when I was feeling crappy about the fic. I can’t explain how much I appreciated every comment from MadCatQueen69, they made my day, and it was nice to know someone enjoyed my fic so much! Thank you! 

This comment is the last from my K Project days, and while I didn’t know this person, they left me with one of the best comments I’ve ever received. When I read this (and even when I reread it now), I get so overcome with pride and emotion. Knowing someone loved a fic of mine this much was so incredible and overwhelming, I couldn’t believe it. SIMS meant a lot to me, and I still think it’s one of the best things I’ve ever written, so this comment means so damn much to me. 

Alright, now onto some of my Haikyuu!! pals! @trashytacosan fff you’re just an amazing writer Cel, like seriously! When I first got into kurotsuki, I read all your fics, and really looked up to you as a storyteller and author. That’s why when we first started talking and you left a comment on one of my fics, I freaked out LOL! I was so happy, and you’re the sweetest <3 I know we’re both super busy so commenting on fics gets tough, but the reviews you leave are so lovely and I appreciate every one, and leaving my essay long comments on your fics is always a pleasure too ;)

@serviceace PINTAAAA. MY KUROTSUKI WIFE. Talking to you is a joy, especially when it’s about our otps fff. The comments you left on my two fics, as well as the constant encouragement and praise you give me, leave me speechless! I’m so lucky to have such a sweet supporter, and such a talented one too! Commenting on your A+ fics never gets old, and I’m thankful for your comments on my writing everyday ^^

@ivyfics oh boy what can I say about you LOL you’re just?? amazing!! stellar?? idek. Ivy, your fics are some of my favorites bc they’re so well written and just FUNNY AS HELL. Your sense of humor is top notch, and I have tons of fun reading and rereading (bc yes, I do that a lot) your fics. But omg your comments are just as funny and sweet as you are! I always feel so fucking blessed when I get a comment from you, because they just make me feel so warm inside. You’re super nice, and you quote lines and point out details and just??? Your reviews are the best ok? Thank you for existing lol. (also hell yes, you and I will revive wlw content, I swear it) 

@rhealmobsidi <3 Kiko! When you left this comment for me I legit died lmao. You’re one of the kurotsuki authors I look up to and admire! Your fics/plots are so great and whenever you update, I drop everything I’m doing just to read! So when you reviewed my fic with such kind words, I was so shocked lol. Thank you so much for being so nice and supportive, and for being an inspiration for fic writers! Your comments give me life, and I reread them constantly lmao

I know you have a tumblr I just completely forgot what it is fff. But ahh you always comment on all my kurotsuki works, and I smile whenever you show up in my inbox. You’re so nice and I appreciate every comment you leave, the encouragement you give is amazing and I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the rest of my fics <3 

@fatty-catty-eatsa-patty I can’t make this post without mentioning you as well! You’re so delightful and sweet, and some of the comments you’ve left me have made my day! Your support and encouragement really helped keep me going in the past, and you’re a joy to see on my tumblr! Thank you for being awesome, and for leaving me one of the best comments ever on SIMS <3 

Again, even though this list is in no particular order, I had to save you for the end bruh @emeraldwaves I love you SO MUCH man, you’re one of my favorite people on this earth, and I’m so happy we could meet through fanfiction. You ask what you’d do without me but tbh it’s more the other way around lmao. You’re my pillar in like EVERYTHING, from fanfiction woes to real life issues, I can always depend on you to hear me out and help me through tough times. You’re a great person and writer! Your fics and your ideas are all so damn A+, reading your fics is a pleasure, never a chore, even when they’re in fandoms I know nothing about LMAO. I trust you so much, which is why I give you all my own shit to read LOOL, BUT ITS NECESSARY OK. Your tastes are top notch and I look up to you as a writer, always have and I always will <3 I can’t imagine a day going by without talking to you ; ; And your comments are hilarious lmao whether they be praising me or scolding me for not continuing my super long plots pft. Both your google docs and ao3 comments make me smile, and so do you! My fics would be trash without you tbh, and I can never thank you enough for being my #1 supporter in this world! 

[survivor-themyscira-blog]

TRIBES SWAPPED AT THIS POINT. 

charlotte make this fucking post already before i combust

YES THIS IS SO PERFECT!!! I WAS SO FUCKED ON THIS TRIBE! NOW I GET A SECOND CHANCE TO NOT BE A FLOP LETS GO LADIES! GOD BLESS

LMFAO LMFAO ME JORDAN AND LILY ARE SAME TRIBE ITS OVER ALREADY WE GOT THIS

I AM WITH LOGAN NUT NUT NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I'm away from Madeline and Joradn and Toph and :( I'm worried! But I chose Kai so that's fun hopefully he'll stick with me fjndsfjsdak I'm gonna try to bond with Madison oh my this is a mess

A 3-3 split on this tribe, I need to find an idol just in case, I'm not willing to go to rocks for Toph and I'm sure he is not for me. Lets see how this goes, Madeline exposing me as her friend already. Lets just win my Hippos, I don't want to go to tribal.

Jaiden.... on my tribe again.... I like him but.... BUT... BUT he talks too much he's going to ruin my game GRRR. Hi Jaiden I love you but you WORRY ME

Ugh I'm like REALLY emo I was separated from Jordan and Madeline what the FUCK we got the best scores WE DIDN'T EARN THISjdjasfklas i miss them rip. and now like everyone on my tribe is.... asleep. They're like ALL europeans. GET UP U FUCKS I NEED TO TALK TO U Also I'm going to make an alliance with one representative from each country and call it the United Nations... I'm just working on it okay it's going to happen

WAIT FUCK IM AWAY FROM RHONE TOO WTF... I didn't think this through last night but honestly my second choice was Logan for the thing (first choice because I wanted him over Kai but I was scared of Madeline and Jordan) so like this wouldn't be very different but ugh. Toph, Rhone, Jordan, Madeline, and Ruthie (I forgot to talk about Ruthie I love her) are gone and I'm EMO AS HECK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NICHOLAS IS PLAYING THIS GAME? I knew this but forgot, I remember he as INACTIVE and got a strike during the selfie round, eventually I hope I can get on his tribe I know he would tell me if he heard my name.

Um another thing. I'm so happy to be on a yellow tribe. I love yellow it's the color of positivity and sunshine and that's me

WOW THIS FUCKING TRIBE SWAP! WHAT THE HELLFUCK! THIS IS SO GOOD! Okay, so. Accordan to Jordan, Rhone wants to work alongside me JP and Nicholas, which I would be fine with. We're also excited for/planning to work with Jack as the trio of Jordan and his students, so... This is probably the most secure I've been all game. I was good on the Hippo tribe, but now I know for sure that I'm alright. But there's one other thing that excites me here, and that's our challenge potential. Sure, that's a general good thing, but it's super cool in my case for one specific reason. I've never been to a premerge Athena tribal. Watch my streak continue.

Time to work my charm on this tribe HOPEFULLY I can find someone trustworthy to work closely with! I've played a game with Ian before and I mean, I thought he didn't like me after but we've talked since then a little and I'm excited that we have another chance to play and maybe start over, he may be the number one to tell all my tea to that I'm looking for!

On 10/16/17, at 10:46 PM, Emily wrote: > hi!! On 10/16/17, at 10:48 PM, Madison 🐷🐷🐷 wrote: > hi! On 10/16/17, at 10:48 PM, Emily wrote: > how are u!! It's currently 11:38pm. Good talk, Madison ;)

Hello my mates! 18 Castaways are left. So, the Swap happened and I am okay with my tribe so far. I get along well with Emily, but I'm a bit concerned that she picked Kai to stay on her team. I'm cautious around him. I'm back with Amanda and I don't really trust her anymore lol, but for now it's best to stick together, especially after what she's been through in the vote. But for now, I still want to talk a bit with Madison and Logan. I feel like I'm not the first target at the moment with a clear group of 2 in play and the old target on Amanda's back. I don't have that much to talk about yet, but I'm keen to get a bit more social now - last week was very heavy on the irl side. But I'm happy to be on a tribe that's so european. :D Cya soon~

Ahh this tribe is pretty lit. I feel really safe within it. I have logan, Emily, Andreas and Amanda ahh this amazing Time to win a game

https://youtu.be/TKydLkGHuNc

I miss having people be awake and I’m awake and having an active tribe wtf happened I hate

I really need these Europeans to wake the fuck up why was I put on a tribe with ALL OF THE EUROPEANS WHAT IS THIS FDMJKLSAJLK I just want their input on the song ideas and they're absent because they're sleeping and I get that but also FUCK THAT WTF I just want to get started with this challenge I'm excited and energized and avoiding doing my homework

I just love Logan

So I'm definitely happy with this new tribe. Lily, Jordan and Nicholas are all people I wanted to work with on Hippolyta so for them to all be here means that we can lose a challenge and probably be okay! I'm completely indifferent towards Jack and Raymond honestly. I'm so bad at connecting w people sometimes especially men, idk why. I'm just slow to warm up to people I guess. I HATE music video challenges because I'm really busy IRL and don't have time for this shit quite frankly. Idek what I'm gonna contribute to this challenge yet so I guess I'll just have to see what I'm able to do tonight.

OKAY NEW TRIBE WOOOOO! Rankdown! Emily - THE SWEETEST SWEET BEAN. Obviously I want to work with her going forward. She'll be my new like f6. She'll beat me past that, comp queen. Kai - My literal son? I love him. He's a good one, and I wanna see if I can make this hoe my goat. I'm not going to be a goat this game, but I'll see if I can be a goat farmer :~) Madison - My inactive queen. I can EASILY make her my goat. I know she _can_ get far in games, and I'd like to take her there again. Hopefully I can make her loyal and keep her out of the crosshairs by feeding her limited information. If she thinks I'm gonna just tell her shit, I can hold onto that relationship for a long ass time. Andreas and Amanda - Both of them talk to me about the same, and these are my first targets to go. While they're both sweet, I don't think they'll end up being much help to the tribe, aside from Andreas winning reward for us. Amanda didn't even guess, not that I'm shocked. I told people this would happen. They didn't believe me. I'm never fucking wrong.

ok so im hella bored at school 1. i am super stoked about the new tribes still! this is GREAT! i have been put into that hippo alliance which makes me think that i am in a p good position bc they see me as a semi-inactive goat type but they also need my vote to keep majority for now so im gonna keep on doing me ~ 2. the reward disadvantage thingy is probably good. it lets us most likely go to tribal and vote someone out which usually isn't a good thing but now i can use my vote as currency to prove loyalty! 3. this challenge? is perfect for my game right now because it lets me participate for once and prove i am an asset to the tribe for now! people are usually reluctant to submit for lip syncs but idc what people think about me so u know my dramatic ass will submit! ok thats it for now yeehaw

I’m on mobile so I can’t quote rn but Logan: Can we just make a pact now Logan: we’re not letting Jordan pines get anywhere near the end of this fucking game Listen, I know he’s right, but... UGH I NEED TO LISTEN TO LOGAN WHO I KNOW WILL BE A BETTER ALLY TO ME jwnjwwnjwnwjwn maybe Jordan will go out pre merge so I don’t have to show anyone my cards regarding him lmao but who can never be sure????

Was awesome to not be given the disadvantage, I'm not sure what all went in their decision as to who to give it to but glad it wasn't us. This challenge is the most dreaded aspect of these games for me. I'd rather have winterbells two rounds in a row than a music video

I feel like this is a school group project that I do my portion for but then I don’t get the portions from any one else until an hour before class. I’m gonna cry tbh Europeans please it’s like 3-4 your time WHERE IS UR SHIT and like literally this song is only three minutes long the least you can do is record yourself lip syncing to the song and upload it to YouTube and send me the link I’m SCREAMING

Okay Amanda is at the emergency room that’s um a very valid excuse but WHERE THE FUCCCCC ARE KAI AND MADISON?? Andreas and Logan told me they were filming later today but @Madison @Kai HENLO U STINKY TRIBE MEMBERS WHERE R U

Omg SO I just got out of my American History class and we have been talking about WWII so my teacher is talking about double agents and this guy called Garbo and I’m literally sitting in class thinking ... this is a genius strategy to use in Survivor I’m crying!!! So like basically I’m going to be Garbo, posing as a German and feeding the Germans accurate information up until D-Day where I fuck everything up for the Germans and get right with the British. D-Day meaning ... the day we take out Germany's closest ally. Germany meaning literally any person I want to screw over and British being ... probably Logan and whomever Logan and I want to work with. See like this would work out better if things were actually happening in the game wkwjwjnsja ... I don’t think much is happening on my tribe (at least I hope not) like I haven’t been put into any alliances so that’s :-/ there’s probably an alliance I don’t know about and they’re plotting against me and I won’t even be able to use my cute Garbo strategy. Also like this is an old and flawed strategy I’m sure but IM JUST TRYING TO BE GARBO OKAY he’s an icon and tbh a very big reason why the Axis Powers lost WWII so we all need to appreciate Garbo. Also if this dude’s name isn’t Garbo then my history teacher told me wrong and I’m just looking really silly but my history teacher is a woke bitch so I trust him. Thank you Garbo for doing the good shit and also inspiring me for this game lol

Anyone want to learn more about Agent Garbo? Um here are articles: http://www.npr.org/2012/07/07/156189716/agent-garbo-the-spy-who-lied-about-d-day https://www.mi5.gov.uk/agent-garbo HISTORY IS IMPORTANT!!!

On 10/19/17, at 3:30 PM, Emily wrote: > hey!! are u able to record videos for the music video challenge? if u can’t it’s no big deal I was just wondering On 10/19/17, at 3:30 PM, Kai . wrote: > Unfortunately not... i did mention it in the tribe chat already xD > Sowwy hun On 10/19/17, at 3:31 PM, Emily wrote: > it’s all good!! OH BITCH I DID NOT NEED THAT FUCKIN ATTITUDE this is me hinting to Kai that he should ... send in a video lmao. I get that like he doesn't have much time but three minutes P L E A S E it's going to be so weird if our video has three people in it! I'm getting Madison to send in a lip sync too (possibly) so that makes me not frustrated with her but like ....... Kai with this attitude "I did mention it in the tribe chat already xD" SHUT THE FUCK UP use REAL FUCKING EMOJIS and then he calls me "HUN" BITCHD FJKDSJFKAS I love over reaction but anyways our video is going to be weird because like Logan, Andreas, and I are the only ones who have submitted stuff!!!!!! UGLY!!!!!

I actually had a lot of fun filming for the challenge! Wish I could've gotten that bass line down a little better...smh I'm really surprised about Jordan. He's like a Sour Patch Kid -- first they're sour, then they're sweet. I just hosted him in Island of Shade and it's funny how I went from literally having his bitch ass blocked after House of Shade 9 to now where we're allies and kind of...friends? He's really matured in the couple of years we've known each other and it's actually really sweet to see. I do feel like he's a great ally for me because he's stronger than me in competitions and I crush him in any endgame scenario presuming I don't totally bungle my social game at the merge (and there's a non-zero chance of that happening tbqh). He's a genuinely good person even if he is kind of irritating at times. I'm like six years older than him so of course I'm gonna find him irritating lmao. Can't really say much about anyone else on this new tribe. Just not getting a great vibe from Raymond, Jack hasn't really tried to talk to me, and I trust Lily and Nicholas but they're both pretty inactive. I feel like Jordan and I are kind of the heart of this tribe right now, which hopefully means if we do lose this challenge we'll be safe. I just really hope someone I wanted to work with in this game doesn't get swapfucked tomorrow! :(

Here is the first draft that I’m submitting a confession to prove that ... only half of our tribe has submitted and we have five hours unrbabsjwbwjwb https://youtu.be/idbuRp73rig I’m literally,,,, CRYING what the HECK where is EVERYONE PLEASE HELP ME why can’t kai submit like wtf. Logan also told me not to expect much out of Madison so WOOHOO!!! I LOVE LOSING IMMUNITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HONESTLY the main thing I've learned from all this is not to listen to what anyone has told me about other people.

Logan

YASSSS MY FIRST IMMUNITY WIN! I DON'T HAVE TO PLAN A TRIBAL COUNCIL! OR NOTHING! I'M SO HAPPY! Prayers for my boy Raymond but yAS!

This is amazing. I was worried that if we lost and i didnt actuallt participate thered be a higher chance of me being voted out but i still feel super safe and in a good position with everyone!

Yay I’m glad we won! I am excited to watch all these!

The Men Lips came out with that WIN HONEY! I’m so happy! How did we do that I’m really shook. I have such low confidence in myself I really did not expect out tribe to win wowie snabajbanan now I get a day off! How fun! I’m sick rn so like that’s good all I want to do is watch Buzzfeed Unsolved and wait for this announcement that Charlotte/LA/JD were talking about earlier.... hmm. If we’re tribe swapping AGAIN I’ll cry sksbsjsnsjs but honestly? Not so bad. I don’t really like my tribe too much but of course I love Logan lol. And Andreas is cool. Anyway YAY WE WON

“i liked the knives and the cat. i also liked the girl waving around the knives. that was the highlight for me.” I WAS THE HIGHLIGHT FOR HER SJJSNSNSNS IM HONORED

Also fun fact: my dad yelled at me for using his expensive professional binoculars because I didn’t put them in their case correctly when I like put them up lol. But it was worth it honey we won-y

Hello again! There's a rainbow outside my window right now. https://i.imgur.com/1KZpEFA.jpg BECAUSE WE JUST WON IMMUNITY! I really didn't expect that since I didn't give it my best, but oh well... I am not complaining. :) Emily did most of the work, props to her. Logan contributed as much as I did. Amanda, Kai and Madison are MIA - even in chat for the most part. But that won't matter too much right now. Also yay, it was fun winning the Reward Challenge by punishing that cheeky A1 placement. CHECKMATE ANTELOPES! There were no Antelopes in Ancient Greece. And soon there won't be any in Themyscira. I am already a bit scared about the next Challenge, but for now, I'll have a relaxed evening. Also, if Madison doesn't start doing much soon, we'll have an easy target SHOULD we go to Tribal Council in the near future. See ya again in Round 4 :)

okay so going into tribal tonight i feel good! i have my og hippo alliance of 4 and then i have good enough bonds with raymond and jack to where i dont think that they would come for me if given the chance. the logical thing to do is to vote out someone who didn't contribute on the challenge, but i know that isn't going to happen because if the og hippo alliance falls apart then that leaves a lot of room for uncertainty. however i do know if we go to tribal more than 1 more time after this i will be the next one to leave the game because i am the lowest on the totem pole for the og hippo alliance. it sucks and i don't want to do it but i think i have no choice but to vote with the hippos damnit

( AS MADELINE )

Wow Madeline is annoying huh?

Oh my god that last confessional was ME djxjsjdjf

(((((Host: bitch >.> ))))

Love Antiope turning into the new Copa... not a good run so far. I'm siding with the Hippolyta majority to vote out Raymond, and after that, me, Jordan, and Lily will become the majority if we have to vote someone out again. Or maybe I'm just gonna get voted out and then I'll just die. Who knows.

[survivormuxloe]

Episode #10: "This is why people hate the gays” - Michael

Oh my fucking god did y’all see that tribal I was like butch it’s me I’m going like bye bye omg but NO it was simply a vote reveal and the idol WILL be mine

So a few things to go over...

One, the plan to get rid of Felix was successful and bought me and Michael another day...HOWEVER, it would appear that I was not the first person to make it to the end of the bridge, which is a shame cuz I REALLY needed this idol, but it's okay.

Because Michael is still gonna be considered a bigger threat than me, and the most likely to go home if we both don't win immunity. That being said, I'm REALLY hoping I can pull this immunity off cuz it'd just be nice to not have to worry about it being me at tribal.

i'm on highkey alert starting now.... this round (and honestly for the rest of the game) is prime time for blindsides and the waters are ripe for it... i really wouldn't be shocked if i'm targeted and have to play my idol hmph. i really really really just want to be able to use it successfully and i will feel content af with my game no matter what happens...

my plan to take out jones is slowly unfolding, i worked on ryan earlier, and got him to see jones as a ringleader.. and he wants her out soon.. which is perfect for me hehe.. i just dropped some hints here and there that she has a lot of connections.. and now he's paranoid that she's gonna bring together a group of michael/david/mo/ahrre... which is perfect for me since i can use him to take her out... funny enough im not sure when i should take out ryan, he's definitely a threat going forward... but if i play my cards right i can take both of them out because i'm also painting ryan as a big target to some of the others hehe.. im trying not to overplay rn bc my ass is not on the line for votes currently, one misstep and I'm gone

im so mad.. rn LMAOAOAOAO like. jones is overplaying as hell n i want michael gone SOOOOOO BAD but i gotta be fake af.. almsldndg

me n ryan r the best duo tho like.. i think ive convinced everyone thet we arent as together as they think umu

So Felix went home. Which I knew about despite voting for Michael. I thought it was gonna be like 5-5 and tobi was considering to flip to avoid rocks. I didnt want Felix gone personally so I sent in a vote for Michael knowing it wouldnt change the outcome.

Jones is really overplaying wanting this next vote to be a split vote. Like no its 3-3-3 that way. THATS NOT SAFE. ITS ASKING for someone to flip. NO. Jones is going home this round or next round. Thats the T.

extra shit.. me tobi rhys ryan are all mad susp of miss jones and i think im tryna convince all of them to stick wth her plans until f7 and us 4 can cut her ass out of the equation :) yayayaya im excited. girl deserves it after her overplaying last week as much as i love her

Wiggling my way out of danger was a huge success, now i'm just hoping to lay low and not cause much drama and basically let the larger players; David, Rhys, Jones take one another out which will allow me to hopefully slip through the cracks and make it far.

nvm idk how to feel ab my position anymore ignore all previous confessionals that i praise myself LMAOAOAOAOA

It’s critical that I try my best to win immunities since my name and David’s is on the line and I’d rather he’d go than me. My best plan is to use Jones to my advantage she has a lot of sway with the other side and by playing off her need to be the leader and to have power to keep me in this game. Everybody wants power and everyone wants control and if Jones thinks that she has control over both sides of the tribe then she’s not gonna get suspicious and take me out.

So I’m a little disheartened by the touchy subjects results. I won “the biggest goat” and “who doesn’t deserve to be here” and it sucks because these people are my friends and I guess most of them think this. But water off a ducks back, I’m going to smile and keep moving forward. I wanna win.

Another day another update. So from were we left off Felix did end up going home good shit he didn't have an idol. He did play the vote reveal thing but I doubt that changed anything in the slightlest lel. That attempt from Scott to save face by also voting Felix is cute tho hehe.

Anyhow so after that we went to touchy subjects which tbh I was waiting because that would be an opening in my game. So Ryan and Rhys think I'm a goat which it's not suprising considering they're the ones I talk to the least. However most importantly Mo was picked as the goat by the most people.

Now this is a tough game and everyone is putting a lot of effort into it so imo it's not easy to point out a goat and Mo is understandably feeling down because he's as much into this game as everyone else. So I knew this was my opportunity to make a move because Mo will be wanting to prove himself to others so if I'm gonna try something this is my best oportunity to get his vote.

Now I grab Michael and David as well who are in a desperate spot and BAM we have the underground boys. So now the plan is simple. Tobi told me they want to split the votes between Mo and Michael in case Michael has an idol, so we get them to split then Mo and me flip and hopefully get someone.

That someone should be Ryan IMO because he's def a duo with rhys and even a stronger duo with Scott. So birds one stone. Plus he called me a goat so hey thre's that :)

lmfao i'm getting dead silence from half the tribe and totally awkward conversation from Jones... definitely getting the vibe that i'm the target. I know Scott got tea from Tobi that Jones has concocted some scheme to split the vote on me and/or rhys or something to that extent? idek i need the full picture tomorrow but lol. should be a fun show no matter what happens

Ok so Michael, David, Fabricio and I formed an alliance because were kind of on the outs. I know this is weird because I had rough pasts with all of them but I really like this alliance. Now, do I trust Michael? Absolutely fucking not, he already lowkey threw me under the bus after the alliance was made. By telling Jones I told him. So I want him gone soon.

bih.. i aint in the mood today at all..

first of all last night touchy subjects. david wins lol x. i get most trusted n least trusted bc thats a thing ig. werk mama.

then to make matters worse... miss jones wants to split on either me or ryan incase michael idols ...

n now ive told tobi abou  t my idol n idk why im just feelin quirky n cool lol

I have to laugh... this game gets wilder by the minute... my position right now is really fragile but its good if i play it right... right now i have a lot of influence over what happens hehe... like i swear to god i feel cocky but lets review some things. 1. Jones is wrapped around my finger... i've been playing this whole super supportive ally and she even gave us the name "kermit and miss piggy" for our duo (me being miss piggy obv) and i've been working hard on her.. i got her to realize michael was actually super manipulating and was using her for a lot of things.. which is funny because that's exactly what im doing to her... she even showed me some stuff he wrote to her and i was consistently telling her that im trying to protect her from being manipulated by him... i swear to god im evil HAHA and like i love her and all but she's a huge social threat and if i see a clear shot im gonna take her out 2. scott scott scott... we were sharing idol guesses a few days ago and he went ghost on me on the guesses... i had suspicions that he was close to getting/had the idol... AND HE LITERALLY TOLD ME HE HAD IT I WAS LIKE OMGGG like this made me SO relieved because that means that i don't have to worry about the merge idol popping up without me knowing, but after i leaked his idol in Saint Vincent i have NO idea why he told me again... like this obv makes me wanna take him out and do stuff but im not gonna leak it again... i think. But like im not here to play fiddle to him... im here to win and if i have to take him out later i will... but the thing is that i don't know when a good time to take him out is, if im in f6 with a bunch of goats, the target is gonna be on me... so i have to think more about what im gonna do about him 3. ryan... i haven't been working hard on him, but he did come up to me with a plan to get me, him, rhys, and scott to the f4 like omg thats pretty iconic but going to f4 with a challenge beast like ryan? i have to laugh... im not stupid... challenge beasts have been the bane of my org career and im not about to let it happen again here... i have a lot on my plate right now, and im playing hard, but what's lovely is that i dont think im a threat to anyone? at least in comparison to the scott/ryan/jones clusterfuck that im gonna try to orchestrate, im lowkey... i swear to god if i actually pull this shit off.... my mind... but then again i might just flop again like usual so who knows hehe

now that ik my name has been thrown out im so nerv ALMFNHFg like i dnt wanna be blindsided 5-4 o.o but uhm i hope for the best n hopefully im smart enuff to play idol ?

i just want jones gone is that so much to ask

idk How to make confessionals apparently Bc I KEEP FORGETTING AHHH Michael comes to me right after the Felix vote and says “hey David crossed the bridge the idol’s gone” and I’m like MOTHERFUCKER. I WAS THIS FUCKING CLOSE. And it obviously scared me because either of them could be lying and one of them could have the idol. And I OF COURSE PANICKED. The next day I went to try and cross the bridge (Bc I was on 90) and I ACTUALLY DID IT!!! but guess what,,,,, THERE WAS NOTHING!!!!! HORRAY!! Idk what I’d do with myself if I got an idol tbh,, that shits scary. But yeah knowing that the idol is gone AND THAT I heard it from Michael first is hella scary and that could mean 3 things - A) theyre felling the truth and it’s gone, B) Michael’s a liar and Has it, or C) David lied to Michael and David has the idol. So right now this information is fucking with my head. And it’s deeeefinitely going to in the next vote.

So David wins immunity and I’m not THAT bothered by it? Of course it just makes things harder for everyone else Bc the original plan was to split between Michael and David, BUT NOW WE CANT. Either way Michael has to go home. He has a really terrible way of getting into everyone’s head and it’s not good for anyone. Plus if he makes it to the end he has such a good chance at winning with an underdog story it’s not even funny ajddjkf. BUT Theres still the possibility that one of those two has an idol, and we really have to think wisely on who would go in case that happens. Tobi thinks Mo is the safer move, but I really don’t think there’s a point in getting rid of someone that everyone thinks of as a sheep. Plus I’d like to sit with him in the end soooooo yeah. My personal preference on who the “blindside target” would be is Ryan. I love him to DEATH and Sweyn to the end, but he’s a challenge threat, and we have to pick off Sweyn eventually if the Muppet alliance wants to be victorious. Michael and david are already on board with getting him out anyway Bc they think he and Rhys are “tight” lol. But right now the vote split should be 7-2 on Michael as far as I know, there’s a solid chance that Mo will get a vote and if he does I’ll actually DIE. Also /according to Michael/, he said that Mo came to him and told him was voting for Michael. AND LIKE THATS THE THING MICHAEL IS PLANTING SEEDS IN MY HEAD THAT MO ISnt some I can trust and that /scares me/ which is why he has to go. If the tribal goes right, Michael goes, if Michael plays an idol, Ryan goes. If it’s a tie between Ryan and Mo, Ryan goes.,,, hopefully.

So, Touchy Subjects, Im almost irrelevant, atleast im honest.

Anyway, The vote plan is Michael. However Jones is scared of an idol. I dont really want to split a vote but Jones is persistant on it. Ive been talking with people and apprently the split vote is on Mo.

However I talk to Ahrre and he knows this information too? Im on the bottom of whatever this is. Like I NEVER hear stuff first. I NEVER feel like I acctually know whats going on.

So to be honest. I dont feel like im going to win. Atleast not on this path. So I need to take a peck at the leader. Jones. Mo and Ahrre are said to be in her pocket. This is bad for 2 reasons. Jones has more power, and they arent doing much thus will be dragged to the end. So removing power, and increasing my odds of getting to the end will be great.

So the split vote is set to be 5-2-2. However, I can safely tell Michael that its 2 on Mo. So Michael & David both vote Mo. This is 5-4. We just need 1 flip to make this happen. So that could either be me, changing my vote to Mo. Perhaps someone else could flip beside me. Fingers crossed.

So it seems like once again I am getting voted and with the amount of idols and such out there it’s getting more and more scary being this bitch who’s constantly getting voted because at any point I’m either getting the majority or I’m getting idolled out. I’m just hoping and praying that everything goes well and I need to start winning immunity

i like don't know what's happening fahsdfhas. i kinda snapped and messaged michael for some reason, i think to see if he was gonna vote me.. and i kinda told him/he asked and i confirmed that there's a split plan in motion and he told me him/david are voting Mo and i was like well if you don't want me out i don't want you out... and Scott tells me he heard throuoght the grapevine (from tobi who heard from ahrre who was told by michael fjasld) that Michael said it was RHYS that let him know??? i'm. so idk faksdjf but i'm floundering a bit tbh. there's like less than 3 hrs until tribal so i hope i figure out concretely whats gonna happen

Alright so let's go through a couple of things.

I WON IMMUNITYYYY. Omg, it felt so good to get redemption after losing this same challenge in my first org. (I got the tiebreaker there too and was WAY off, LOL fuck me) And anyways, it feels good to not have to worry about it being me tonight and to have a spot in the final 8. Hopefully this shows people that I've BEEN here to friggin play.

So now as it stands for tribal tonight...myself, Michael, Mo and Ahrre are gonna vote Ryan out. The other side are planning to split their votes 3 for Michael and 2 for Mo cuz they think Ahrre and Mo are voting for Michael. If all goes well and no idols get played, then we're in for the biggest power shift this season has seen and I cannot wait to be a part of that shift, cuz it's FUCKING GO TIME BABY

ugh the idol paranoia i'm having rn........ i can't if i go home w the idol im gonna hate myself n if i misplay the idol im gonna hate myself jlskhfd like this vote is so uncertain to me.. i could be overthinking but i just dk... so like i almost want to just be messy and get the other 5's votes on me and idol myself…

ok so messy ryan jumped out and acted on his idolinpocket paranoia flaksdhf. i talked to both mo and michael and threw jones under the bus pretty bluntly.. mo seemed to already knoow that jones created the split plan w him as the vote, and is just acting like he thinks he's going home so idk if thats genuine or not. michael on the other hand, seems genuinely thinking it was between him or mo and now wants to get ahrre and me to vote mo with him and david and rhys who already voted mo. fladfjas so i've realized i was highkey overthinking but. this is interesting

Right so idek where I left off but I think it was right after the underground boys were formed. Anyhow so Jones was weary of ryan so she thought about voting him, thing is he only wanted him as a backup plan in case Michael played an idol because everyone and their mums want him dead at the end of the day I guess.

So I'm like ok let's get michael and david to vote ryan with us and then while one of us still votes michael to make it a 4-3-2, (without letting her know Mo was with us and that I would vote ryan anyways lel) but then she freaked out and so did everyone really and they suddenly didn't want to split anymore and everyone was voting Michael.

However I managed to convince Tobi (and by proxy the rest of sweyn cause let's face it tobi is on top of this game that's another guy I've got to get rid of) to split the vote anyways, so as it stands Tobi and Rhys are voting Mo and Ryan Scott and Jones are voting Michael. But the thing is that they think Mo and me are also voting Michael but in reality we're gonna vote Ryan so it SHOULD be 4 votes Ryan 3 Michael and 2 Mo.

Now my worry is that if Ryan plays an idol it all goes to shit but I'm trying my hardest to make sure he doesn't know. Anyhow let's see how this plays out.

It doesn’t feel good to be facing elimination especially now that jones is voting me. Any slight deviation from the plan for anyone could lead to my elimination but I hope that now ryan is voting mo that I might just scrape by once again and with jones’ Transparent game she shouldn’t be Long behind Ryan.

lmao so they (michael, david, ahrre, mo) tried to pull off a rly good move flipping their votes onto me. and if only rhys hadn't had to sleep early and didnt vote Mo, I'd be sitting pretty but they did that.... unfortunately for them, apparently Jones fucked up heavily and immediately voted Michael in the revote? did i hear that correctly? KLFSJLDFHS WIG. i kinda feel bad bc... i really should be leaving here but.... wig. I had done some campaigning to Mo before I found this out and think i was making some good groundwork to get him to keep me and he was at least oon the fence, so i might have had a shot even if jones were gonna vote me. but wig.. if she really did that, then that means me and scott have made the final 8 and we still have 2 idols in our pockets WHEW. big moves is coming ladies

This is why people hate the gays smh. Please be ryan please be ryan please be ryan go home Ry ry

ugh can't believe my best friend michael is leaving tonight ): LMSHNBG am i fuck..

legit im sooooo happy ryan is staying altho a little peeved as well tbh.. i coulda had 2 idols :flushed: but i wont complain.............

anyway. i still think jones is crazy n her idea of trying to get me to flip on ryan is absolutely absurd ALMJFNFG like bitch.. i know im on the bottom if i flip im not dumb why do u think i didnt vote mo like u told me to lAMNFHBFG IJS!!

i just gotta win immunity next week n im confirmed at least f5? hopefully? LAMNHFBFG like. i dont wanna. be tied on. and i wanna keep this idol for the l0ong haul. which is why i told ryan and tobi. oooop. LAMNJHBFG.

PROB NOT A GOOD IDEA TELLING TOBI but i rly do trust him this time around... he gives me legit all the tea n i do the same back :flushed:

lolll i lvoe having the worst jury management :))) love sticking to sides :)))) like i aint gunna clear that perception up by voting ryan suck my dick he trusts me and thats all i care about..

like. im gunna be hounded on for not flipping to a side who wants me out n thats so annoying!! i rly cant win aLMFHFG. these cunts can fuck off idc ill argue with every single one of them

michael... he's a cockroach... he wont just DIE like there have been so many times where there was something stopping him from leaving... last round jones wanted felix so we obliged and now its this stupid tie revote kjflkjdf like this is exactly why i wanted him out earlier... getting numbers against him is gonna be hard and i really hope his ass leaves in the revote... he should anyway hehe.. i have a few options going forward and i feel like i could possibly do a lot but the question is do i want to be doing a lot??? if people start thinking that im a threat then shit LMAO but the thing is there are so many goats and pawns (mo, ahrre, david) that if you do anything significant, your threat level is obvious and like i want to take out some of the threats but im worried if i take out too many,,, the goats will become sentient and take my ass out... i just need to take this one vote at a time while planning for the future its simple :^)

ITS BEEN A MESSY 24 HOURS AND HERES THE FUCKING TEA so the vote ended up being a tie. NOT THE ONE I PREDICTED. It ended up being a Michael/Ryan tie. AND IMMEDIATELY AFTER AJ EXPLAINS THE RULES MICHAEL BLOWS UP MY WHOLE FUCKING GAME (almost.) he says “Jones you orchestrated this vote follow through with it” AND IM???? LITERALLY??? Ryan was never a target of mine,,, never the main target I mean BUT NEVER A TARGET. David Mo and Michael all told me that Ryan was gunning for me though,, but that was AFTEr I revoted for Michael sooooooooo that’s the tea. But like,, Michael is,, kind of being an asshole. Very much so. I feel like he’s taking advantage of my emotions to try and manipulate me into Saving him, but I really wouldn’t mind if either him or Ryan went?? Preferably Michael obviously lol. He was never someone I wanted to take to the end anyway, so it’s better to get rid of him while we can lol. Also!!? That dumbass shit that Michael said on hangouts??? Rhys and Ryan made a whole ass 180 in our relationship Bc THEY THOUGHT I VOTED FOR RYAN BC OF WHAT MICHAEL SAID AKDJKDFNJF. Thank god I was actually able to work it out with them, but like,,, fuck that scared me. This is why Michael needs to go Bc he’s a loose cannon and will DESTROY MY GAME. OFF WITH HIS FUCKING HEAD

i finally understand why no one respects Mo as a player lol, he really has no back bone of his own at all..

The vote ties 4-4-1, and Michael is sent home 4-3 after a revote.

[survivekohsai]

Episode 7 - I Need To Blow Off Some Steam Anyway ~ Jackson

*cries like Big Meech* I wanted to stay in Exile!!

We reached merge and I hope this is jury as well!

I like to say that me and Jackson were the only people who attended every tribal Council. Because when we won that immunity Kelsey med Evacuated meaning that they didn't have a tribal council then next came a double tribal Council. So this means that I might be pulling a Denise Edit. Lets pray!

Exile is sad. No one picked me so thats sad. I was blindsided by the raf vote so thats sad. Im in f10 now so thats good and i still have an idol so thats good. But now im gonna have to work super hard to find connections. Need to put an end to rtp/jackson cuz i think thats a thing. Unless its like a jackson/quinlynn/akito thing which is also iconic i guess. RTP could have voted akito and then eric voted me? Idek and it sucks because its old news once i get back

i couldn't really do the challenge bcuz thxgiving. but when i was here and saw akito started it awhile ago and it goes by our time i thought that we'd be screwed.... turns out the other tribe barely worked on it so... shit. part of me wants to vote for richie and save my idol (as a risk, idk what tf everyone is doing). or just play my idol and see what tf happens. no idea what i should do. even if i talked to these people....... they'd just lie to me. cause akito, linus and quilynn are all aligned so idk what to do. maybe ill talk to richie.

okay well richie knows the other 3 are aligned. so we talked about both of us playing our idols, or only me, and voting for akito/quilynn. if it ties get quilynn out who still has her idol. and if she plays it akito goes home. idk if richie will play his idol or who they'll vote for but oh well!

Woh hey I'm actually making a move this round. Richie is idoling, Ryan might be, so if that happens Richie and I are voting akito to hopefully keep me protected, or I'm getting played and I'm going home

Hi I'm Jackson and this is my seventh confessional. I'm not going to tribal but I'm writing this cause I have to and I need to blow off some steam anyway. I'm REALLY worried about Akito at this tribal. Whether or not she survives depends on how well Quillynn can fool Richie (and how involved Ryan is in telling Richie the truth), and it sucks to not be able to have a direct impact on the vote. But before that I'll talk about last time. The Rafael blindside worked (yay!) and with the most fucked up vote tally ever - like 3-2-1-1-1? Honestly iconic. When will your faves. I know it should've been 4-2-1-1 if Trixie hadn't self voted but yknow. I'm still proud of it. Let's talk about that self vote though. Trixie can say all she wants that it was an accident, but it very well could've been strategy. If she self votes at important tribals, she can keep herself from appearing to take a concrete side, which I KNOW she would love, especially after she made herself such a huge target in Kvaloya. Either way I like her a lot but I see what an influential player she is (she got me to flip to Rafael SUPER easily) and can't let her get too much power. Also Jordan Means got voted out which is a blessing. We really had no chance of working together and also he was kind of an ass so I'm not mad. The only thing that really WRECKS me is that i learned from Linus that if Kelsey hadn't self voted and gotten medevaced at the fifth tribal, Regan and Ryan M. would've both played their idols and it would've been a messy smackdown for the ages. I'm so upset that didn't happen. Ever idol that Ryan M. doesn't play is another obstacle I have to overcome if I want to win (side eyes the Kvaloya hosts) Okay so then we had the schoolyard pick. I had to pick first, and I was going to pick Akito (because I love her) but I went for RTP instead because I knew if we lost, he would be an easy vote out (he played his idol at the Rafael tribal which made me super happy). He ended up picking Regan, she picked Trixie, and Trixie picked Eric. This put me in a decent position - so decent, in fact, that me and Trixie were ready to throw. What's a pre-merge tribal if it didn't involve a challenge thrown by me and Trixie? We would lose, protecting Quillynn/Akito/Linus on the other side, and dump RTP (probably unanimously), cementing Eric and Regan's trust in us. However, the other team proved to be so incredibly terrible that despite our best efforts to throw we were unsuccessful. I'm honestly so shocked. We only got 29 bottles which is pretty fucking bad but they got like... three? Okay werk. I think Ryan M. may've been trying to throw, which doesn't bode well for the tribal tonight (why is he so confident?), but like... Ok werk So yeah. Linus, Akito, and Quillynn (my allies) are going to tribal with Richie and Ryan M. I haven't spoken to Richie (like RTP, he doesn't respond to my messages), but if Quillynn can fool him into voting Ryan, this bodes well for them. They can split 2-2 on Ryan and Richie (with one of the votes for Ryan being from Richie himself), so that if one of the two plays an idol, Akito will still be safe (since I'm assuming Ryan will go for someone without an idol). And if Richie seems really bent on throwing a vote to Akito (an idea he has teased to Quillynn), then Quillynn will switch her vote from Ryan to Richie, which will hopefully send him packing and cause Ryan to waste his idol. The one hang up has to do with info. Akito made a huge mistake when she was on exile with Ryan M, as she told him about her majority alliance on Rayong that included me, Quillynn and Linus. If Ryan tells Richie about this, then Richie may not believe as easily that Quillynn isn't trying to make him the backup if Ryan idols. If Ryan and Richie both idol, Akito is probably toast. I would be so upset if that happened. She hasn't played a perfect game (wasting her idol, giving up info, etc) but I've really gotten close with her and I want us to be able to go deep into the game together. Okay, that's probably enough. I'm clearly very nervous which is why I'm venting in the confessional so sorry if my next few entries are not nearly as detailed haha byeeeeeee

dont strike me! jackson is the best i hope he wins

If everything goes as planned tonight then either ryan or richie will leave, I think one or both might idol though, which is dangerous. I’d rather ryan leave since he blocked everyone and completely ghosted but lbr he probably won’t be, I could even be taken out tonight, who knows

i finally feel like im in a game... my goal for this round is to get akito out and to keep my idol. i want akito out because she fucked up this immunity challenge so im annoyed but i mean we're likely only on this team bullshit for this one round so im not too worried about keeping a tribe strong to win challenges but i know that she proved herself in the nerf dart challenge that shes willing to play hard + only her and linus dont have their idols on this team and i want linus around so going for akito will ensure that the vote is on someone who cant fuck it up with an idol.... i've talked to everyone and idk whos telling the truth ryan is a mess but i want him around so that come merge him and regan battle it out and the attention is on those 2 and that will give me some time to slide by. linus told me that akito and q talked about voting for me in case of a ryan idol play, q came to me and said that we should split the votes and we talked about me voting for akito but i know now that was bullshit, ryan and i talked about him playing dead so that they vote for him tonight with the thought that he'd self vote...... i really dont want to play my idol because i want to keep it going into the merge but i know not playing it is a huuuuuuge risk... i've been planting seeds with people that i'll likely play it so that theyre afraid to vote me but i wont confirm or deny 100% that i'm playing it bc if i say that and dont play it and dont get voted out i dont want to appear sketchy like i was lying????? but idk its probably stupid of me to not just outright say HEY BINCHES i'm playing this idol dont vote for me or it will be a waste and then hoping they dont call me on the bluff???? idk who knows... i'm just going to send my vote in for akito, probably not play my idol, and hope that linus votes with me and ryan doesnt vote for me?????? idk im down to make the risk and if it doesnt pay off then i havent been playing a stellar game anyway so might as well go out on a bang

I feel great being immune this once. I feel like based on this team I was in that if we lost immunity that it would really hurt my alliance.

Ryan played his idol

Akito voted out 2-1-1-(1)

Richie, Linus voted Akito

Akito voted RIchie

Ryan voted Quillynn

Quillynn’s vote for Ryan was negated

[worldofsurvivorcomoros-blog]

RITES OF PASSAGE

Jay - Fuck you

Regan - Kage!!! I love you so much. you're an amazing person and you're iconic. but you had to go. I was in an alliance in the beginning with Karen, Drew, Logan, and Andie. Drew's sole mission was to get you out. And so we followed that and the alliance of us got you out. So sorry. You had to go to please Drew. 

Regan - I wish I got to know you better. You seemed nice and very new to the community. Wish you first real game could've been longer. (at least I think it was your first). Maybe we can talk after the game. But you were had to go next sorry

Regan - Bun- Sort of the same thing I said to aqua. I never met you before. never. I don't think I talked to you once during this game. I wish I had. You were probably a nice person. but like aqua, you were just a casuality in our alliance. 

Andrew - Rip I wish we coulda had more time together but you got super engrossed in your Legend of Zelda game asdfghj. I know you weren’t super into games though when you were eliminated so I hope we get to play together again soon when your head’s back in the game!

Veronica - you were so inactive in this game just like the other 2 we were also in together. i don’t know how you got voted out in this game but it 100% had to be because you were just not around. rip.

Andrew - WHEW tbh you had me really worried like all of pre-merge so I wasn’t super super upset you went. That being said it was fun getting to know you and watching Great Lakes was a ton of fun!

Veronica - you were so messy and idek what you tried to accomplish the day you were evicted but it didn’t work and u walked so ur lame

Andrew - Rip I realize we didn’t talk much. But I’m sure you’re awesome anyway!

Veronica - i honestly don’t remember you or at least cant think of you atm and i tried to look at my history and i have no convos with any ryans so idk if u actually existed and ya idk

Regan - You were swap fucked and completely and utterly robbed. You deserved to make merge and make final 3 with me. I love you so much and I was so happy to finally play a game with the iconic andie. You were the one person in that alliance I knew I could trust then boom just like that you were gone. YOU WERE ROBBED. Queen <3

Veronica - ily my egg you were done so dirty when like me and two others left our tribe and u were left with logan and some other person i cant think of now maybe it was ryan idk but u know i love you and i wish you would have stayed longer

Andrew - Whew your boot was a wild one and I wasn’t sure what to expect. I know you’re a sweetheart though and I wish you stayed a bit longer so we really could have talked more and solidified not only a game relationship, but a personal one as well.

Regan - I don't really remember how you left. But I do remember that you saved me. You literally saved my entire alliance. Because Andie sent you nudes. You are weak honey <3. That's why you turned. You set my game up to be as great as it was. From the point on where you flipped, I took my game into my own hands, and I thank you because now I'm in the final 3. and I have a 1/3 chance of winning. 

Veronica -  games always do us dirty when we are in it together tbh I’m happy it did u dirty and not me (at least at this point in time) but ur pretty and beautiful and stay that way 

Andrew - Your boot was even more crazy than Shea’s and honestly I was just as blindsided as you. I was expecting that if I had survived early merge, that we would have been going deep together. But my entire game got flipped upside down by your elimination, and it was really a turning point for me. I wish it hadn’t happened, but know that it changed the whole course of my actions.

Regan - I know you're mad at me right now because of your game. But listen I was blindsided by your vote. I had no clue what happened. I had no idea about the split vote. I didn't plan that, because Andrew and Karen always had their own plans. But I voted with you that time, I never wanted you to go. You were a vital ally to me, at least I believed that. 

Veronica - we really didn’t talk that much but we were in an alliance together idr the name of it at all and it had a couple of others in there as well and i was one of the two people that didn’t actually know or had plans to do u dirty and vote you out from our alliance so when you left i was actually shook 

Andrew - AAAAHHH NNNNN AAAAHHH okay I need to compose myself. Getting to know you even though we didn’t talk a ton was great. We’d talk a lot in the tribe chat and tbh you seemed like an awesome person who I found really easy to interact with. So when the S*pphire Idol vote happened I just- god. I am so sorry that you were the victim of that. In terms of this I say that everything happens for a reason, and I managed to get to the final 3! Idk if that woulda happened either way, but you really didn’t deserve that and I’ve waited like 3 weeks to say that. I hope you aren’t too upset at me over it and that we can remain friends when this is all over.

Regan - I thought I was at the bottom, but then your vote happened. this vote turned my entire game upside down. Yes this was Andrew's sole move, it was the move that sent you packing and turned the game around for my alliance. Yet, after that I knew my game was mine. I knew that because I had the numbers I could control my own destiny. No one saw me as a threat so once you got out and I knew I had the numbers, I could control my game. 

Veronica - ily but we never really talked in the game but u were one of the people that i wanted to wait until the last possible moment to even suggest as a vote and you were done SO dirty like i was literally the :o emoji when i saw you were voted out but you’re so amazing and i hope if we do play a game together again that we work more closely next time

Andrew - Another person I got to talk to a bit more through this game! I mean, we were never really together, but things were always chill with you and you were one of the people that really made this merge cast just seem like a personally calm one (even though everyone was constantly strategically freaking out oops). You’re vote out was yet another wild one but I’m glad you fought in this game as hard as you did.

Regan - You were just a casuality to get Daisy out. You didn't deserve it, but we also knew they'd least expect you to go home. Once we figured out that we made a mistake in creating the alliance we creasted we also realized that you daisy and logan were working together- along with drew and luke. And that we had to do something about it. So we voted you out.

Veronica - ok so like you are one of the nicest people ever and you’re literally so good at games and i wanna host u so bad and like you already know i think all this because I’ve told you but its true and i was sad to vote you out but at the time i needed to for the better of my game and ya don’t hate me pls

Andrew - Drewbert. Whew. Idk what to even say. We’ve played so many games together, and it’s never a case of us being super against each other or super with each other. I see that as super similar in us because we’re adaptable people in my eyes. One second we’ll be against each other, but then we’ll end up close allies. Another game we’ll start out together, and the come for one another. But it’s always in the spirit of the game and never malicious and I’ve always high-key appreciated that. I’m sorry your boot happened the way it did, but it just looked like one of those times where it inevitably flipped to us being on opposing sides. You’re always a fighter though and that’s something I always love to see in you, and I think/am hoping you’re able to say the same thing for me.

Regan - Oh poor Drew. You have won so many games I cannot even count. You were going to win had you made it any further. What you don't realize is how important your vote out was to securing my spot in the final 3- maybe even the final 2. that move started the alliance of me, Daisy, and Veronica. And from there we controlled the game.  Once we got Luke and Daisy to turn on you, my final 3 with Daisy and Veronica was set in stone. I realized at your vote that I needed to continue to play under the radar so  I could slowly but surely pick off the others not in our 3, one by one. 

Veronica - this still applies so I’m just gonna copy and paste what i said to u in mystic lmao

Andrew - KARN my dad what did they do to you : ( NNNN you were one of the bigger players in this game and I feel like we both totally saw our dynamic duo-ship being broken eventually, but when it happened your Sondrew was sad. I am glad we got to finally work together through an entire Survivor game until one of our eliminations at the hands of someone else though. And that’s literally after a year like?? I’m shook. And we actually worked well together which was EVEN MORE SHOOKENING. We were really doing that huh?

Regan - You got out because of me. Let me make this clear- You. go. out. because. of. me. Hate it or love it. this was my move to make. Daisy and I were willing to go to rocks to get you out. We were gonna vote veronica to save her ass in the tie.  Then just hope you got rocked out. I spent this entire round convincing Veronica and telling Veronica why you needed to go. I got Veronica to flip, and that was 10 minutes before tribal. I had to convince her that daisy trusted her, because she was on edge thinking that Daisy didn't despite our deal. I had to get you out because you were the biggest threat to my game. I had a final 3 with you and Andrew. But that does not mean I was going to stay loyal. I was until I realized how many votes you were getting in the end- people loved you and you seemed to be leading our alliance thus why I had to cut you. 

Veronica - karen i actually love u sm ur iconic and a queen and honestly would have won this if i hadn’t done u dirty and voting you out was one of the hardest things i had to do bc like u already know I’m 100% lesbian for you and i promise u that if we are in a game together again i will actually die for u 1000% pls marry me i left jev for u ily

Andrew - God your vote out was a super emotionally charged one. You fought for your damn life and it had me shaking in my boots. Even when I was YELLIN that I had to go host a live tribal for Solomon you wouldn’t give up. For the time we did work together though, it was pretty great. This merge was such a wild one that I didn’t know if we would be able to get to the end together or not, and I’m sorry that we didn’t. You were a big player though, and sometimes big moves gotta me made.

Regan - you did not deserve to go. And you fought so much until the very end. The thing was no matter what you said or did, you were going right after Karen. Daisy liked you, I liked you but you were a huge challenge threat, while I'm not sure if you would have won the jury over, we needed to get you out before you ruined our chances of going to the final 3. As soon as you lost a challenge your game was over. if you won this, Andrew would be sitting on the jury and not you. 

Veronica - luke ily as a person but i DID NOT trust u in this game and RIGHTFULLY so…u tried to get me out >.> ya freak and like i remember we were on call once being like “why don’t we work together in the games we are in together?” and like we should have but i don’t think it was ever meant to be…maybe one day………..

Andrew - Ooooooooh my god this was also one super upsetting vote out. And ya wanna know why? Because I haven’t made a good friend like this from just one game in a while. A lot of the time it’ll take a couple games for me to become acquainted and then really get to know someone. And I feel like now that I’ve been in this community consistently playing games for a year and a half now, it’s harder for me to do that. But we hit it off really quick! And I thought you were an awesome person! So honestly it was awesome getting to know you, and I will forever feel shitty about your vote out. But you fought like many of the other people I’m addressing in these speeches, and I’m glad you did. I hope we get to keep talking after this game, and I really hope our friendship gets to continue afterwards.

Regan - I cried over your vote. You didn't deserve getting voted out. But I knew last night, I was the one making the decision whether the vote tied 2-2 between you and Veronica, or if you left. I was loyal to Veronica for so long and I couldn't just abandon her. You were so easily beat me, and I know you pleaded to me that you wouldn't, but I saw it as you played a good game. You got your way back up after being at the bottom multiple times. You fought your way until the very end. You asked for an extension on the vote because you wanted to give me your plea one last time. truth is, I would've lost a vote if I made it tie and possibly made veronica go packing. It also just wasn't good for my game. I couldn't risk losing to you. I'd rather go out at final 3, knowing I'd win if I made it, then lose in a final 2.

Veronica - ok whew from all the people i think i did you the most dirty in a way just because i knew it was gonna be either me and you when one of us had to be voted out and you were a threat im my opinion so i had to get you out and remind regan that it was smarter to get you out over me and not let it go to rocks but i love u and you were a great ally in this game and ya if we ever play in a game together again i know ur a loyal trustworthy person and ur just so great and ur snap stories are always so lit bc you be serving up some looks