#idec that i don't have anything to play this on just having it in my home is enough

[burningcomputerpersona]

MY SISTER CITIES BOOK AND VINYL HAS FINALLY ARRIVED

HELLO GORGEOUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[boneless-mika]

Let me obsess for a little bit

A beast!

Yes... haha... yess.... I love cooling (my current laptop overheats like all the time. Bad enough to shut off) and somehow more quiet anyway?? (I mean compared to right this moment I'd hope so, I'm wearing ANC headphones and it's too loud)

The touchpad is glass?? Truly the cadillac of the laptop world. I'd be scared to even touch this computer (especially bc my current laptop is so dirty you'd probably judge me not fit to care for a laptop...)

[rosyfingered-moon]

Sejak episode 16

So daebi said: just marry this crossdressing weirdo that you're sexually obsessed with and have an heir, it's fine idec at this point. And Yi In didn't immediately jump on that but was like, well mom if you want it then I'm NOT going to do it 😤

Since this is the final installment I want to officially thank Sang-hwa for his service to the crown! His loyalty and diligence is only rivaled by his commitment to the bit. One of my favorite scenes in this entire show is the Gay Rumor era where he sprints off with the swiftness of Hermes to fetch the king's boyfriend some candy

I must say I wish they would've talked more baduk when they play baduk. They always debate their real life issues and the game is just something they dabble with in the background, the way I embroider things while watching TV, but they could be meta-talking about baduk strategies in a way that convinces us that this really is their Mutual Obsession while simultaneously shedding light on their personalities. Is Mong-woo an aggressive and haphazard player? Is she more intuitive or more calculating? Has she memorized previous games or does she not have to, because she's operating on Pure Vibes? I still don't know what they're like as players, or if the king is ever close to winning, or if Mong-woo is getting kinda bored of playing against him because he never puts up a real fight. (And how does that then translate to their sexual relationship: she told her dad from the start that she'd only marry someone who could beat her.) In their first game they didn't speak a word because they were so absorbed, and they didn't even notice it had begun to rain -- I liked that much better, because if Mong-woo is the greatest baduk genius in the world then she would be more obsessive about it, almost to the detriment of their relationship, like Beth in The Queen's Gambit. She'd want to go to Qing for the challenge and thrill of playing the Emperor, not (only) for her country and king and father. Okay sorry rant over.

Sometimes I pounce on my partner like this when he's just about to leave for the supermarket and I say "kdrama back hug 🥺" and he's always very patient with this extremely annoying behavior

"I cannot send Mong-woo to the Qing alone. So I'll choose the violent criminal who tried to stab me and instead stabbed her. He'll keep her safe."

Sure this is satisfying but did we have to spend so much time on this when we've got like 45 minutes airtime left to show Mong-woo's life-changing trip to Qing? Let me see her play the Emperor and pretend to lose! Let me see her flirt with the imperial harem and gain friends and enemies in court!!! Also: how did her father react to her crossdressing (since she gave it up when Myung-ha threatened to tell daddy)?

Shin Se-kyung having to teach worthless noblemen on how to start a fire is a must for any sageuk. To me.

It’s actually very sweet that everyone's just treating her like the princess now. But what's going to happen with the real princess? Another thing that they could have wrapped up instead of...

THIS. So writernim introduced this guy as a new threat in the last ep and then resolved it with no tension or conflict. Another thing that we could maybe have just have skipped in favor of Mong-woo Wreaking Havoc in the Imperial City.

PLEASE I don't understand anything!!! So they'll stay together forever now. But Mong-woo doesn't want to be his concubine (she'd resent him). And Yi In has no apparent plans to abdicate (he'll be king until he dies). Is she going to stay on as gidaryeong, and if so, why didn't she return to her station right away but tried to sneak away?

It’s so funny that she just gave up and told him her name anyway lmaooo. She was like baby you'll never beat me let's not pretend ❤️

Despite my ranting I did love this drama very much!! A fantastic set up with a somewhat underwhelming execution is my sweet spot because it means I can write fic about it 🫶

[green-socks]

tag game

Thank you for the tag @novemberrain-writes <3

what's the origin of your blog title? i wanted something fairly nondescript (nothing fandom related, nothing me related), looked down and i was wearing green socks then so i was like sure yeah what the hell lol

OTP(s) + shipname: icemav (iceman/maverick) is one i will always be serious about, and of course i spend far too much time with hangster (hangman/rooster) because i am a basic bitch at the end of the day. but truly i'll ship anything given the chance and right motivation!! love my rarepairs <3

favorite color: dude you'll never guess

favorite game: board game? terraforming mars. video game? lego star wars (the complete saga), idec, i've played it through so many times

song stuck in your head: currently it's pomelo by stuzzi (thanks to me eating a pomelo last night and my partner being like hey here's a song for you)

weirdest habit/trait?: i blow on my fingers/hands a lot?? i'm not even sure why exactly. i bite half of a candy and put it back in the bag. i tap thrice on a can before opening it (and i thought this was common but it's apparenly not aöljgkhl)

hobbies: dancing, reading/writing, watching a bunch of movies, knitting/crocheting!

if you work, what's your profession?: teacher by education but i've only done other jobs still in the field of education/learning since graduating lol, mostly to do with digital learning

if you could have any job you wish what would it be?: currently any job at all would be very nice :)))) but i do think i would still enjoy teaching if i just could do it like 3 days a week instead of the full 5 y'know.

something you're good at: making people laugh

something you're bad at: keeping myself hydrated! why is drinking water so hard sometimes like ????

something you love: in honor of it being my dad's birthday today, i'm gonna say that i love the elephant plushie he got me for christmas this year. i sleep with it every night and it's been a game changer!

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: i don't wanna say tom cruise but like. lbr probably tom cruise.

something you hate: eating sounds :|

something you collect: random receipts and tickets and shit like that for my scrapbook

something you forget: using my steam inhalation machine! literally just forgot yesterday even though i've been having trouble breathing like what's not clicking

what's your love language?: i like to give physical touch but receiving words of affirmation is important to me

favorite movie/show: movie? *sighs* top gun: maverick. show? gilmore girls, probably.

favorite food: sushi. or just anything salmon really!

favorite animal: bear!! more specifically i'm partial to the brown bear

what were you like as a child? talkative, outgoing, bit of a know-it-all, sick a lot. literally i have not changed, just toned it down a bit lmao.

favorite subject at school? history

least favorite subject? physics

what's your best character trait?: i have to say the extroversion comes in handy a lot ??

what's your worst character trait?: being rash/speaking without thinking

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be?: i would change the weather rn. global warming is fucked up.

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet?: i think i'd like to go back a few generations in my family and see how they lived, in the village they were exiled from. it's beautiful there. and it would be interesting to see if i could find something familiar about them, like some family traits.

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!): i know i haven't stopped thinking about this one intermittently ever since i read it last year. i feel like it's a fantastic read even if you're not usually a fan of the pairing (like who doesn't love dragons!) https://archiveofourown.org/works/47614693

np tags: @blue-aconite @a-reader-and-a-writer @deathbecomesnerds @writeforfandoms @outercrasis and genuinely anyone who wants to play!! i would love to catch up/get to know you!!

[myfairkatiecat]

GOOD NEWS

Follow up on earlier ask

So I went and played gaga ball again earlier today

He was there and whatnot and he either forgot about the situation or ignored it

Cause we were playing as normal

And the thing is he's just really great to be around

Probably the nicest boy I've ever hung out with that can still joke around and get into (goodhearted) screeching matches with

Even if I couldn't go to the dance with him I just wanted to at least be friends

So I got the courage about 2 hours ago when we were both out in gaga ball and went up to him

I asked him "Hey Wilson you've been really fun hanging out with would it be alright if i got your number"

I DID IT WITHOUT STUTTERING OR SHAKING

THE ONLY OTHER TIME IVE ASKED FOR A GUYS NUMBER I WAS A WRECK (still got rejected A few days after I got it tho lol 🥲)

And I asked if I could get a picture of him for the profile pic

He did a funny little pose and told me to wait as he putt some sunglasses on and did a funny little smile (not gonna show it for privacy reasons but it was awesome)

Like idec if I have no shot with him anymore he's really just a great guy to be around and I'm glad I'm able to still keep in touch

Probably overreacting but all the other guys I've hung out with at my school are either annoying, rude, or when you do litterly anything goofy they start freaking the heck out cause omg a girl is getting excited at 4 square so this is new territory for me

He's just gonna be goofy with you and has a great energy

Litterly so nice he helped me out of the water at the beach when the waves were choppy and got I put through the wringer making sure I didn't fall again, popped out of the water at another time and goes "Hey Ik you your gaga ball girl" (litterly only knew each other as gaga ball girl/guy for a few days 😭) when we happened to cross paths, helped me up and dusted me off when I fell in gaga ball and scraped myself up pretty badly (I'm accident prone ok 🥲)

Ok I'm done ranting now sorry lol

Just brand spanking new territory for me never even had a guy friend before so I never got the hype my friends talked about before now

Also sorry for sticking this random thing in your asks

You feel like an internet big sister and I don't have an irl sister so this is the next best thing I could think of 😭

Awwwww internet little sister that’s amazing!!

[redwinelew]

JOYRIDE

pairing lewis hamilton x east-asian singer!reader

summary in which the internet goes wild when the seven times formula 1 world champion co-wrote and stars in his girlfriend's music video for her comeback single after a long hiatus.

face claim rina sawayama

song joyride by kesha

warnings swearing, suggestive parts, kms jokes

author's note my first smau!! feedbacks are appreciate<33

english is not my first language. all pictures taken from instagram, pinterest and twitter. credit to owners.

masterlist | request info | requests are OPEN!

ynln just made a post!

liked by arianagrande, carlossainz55 and 489,273 others

tagged lewishamilton

ynln enjoying life 💙

view all 1,059 comments

user1 "enjoying life 💙" as if u don't have an album to write like ok 🙄🙄

user2 user1 ???? she doesn't owe u anything — liked by ynln

user1 user2 omg it was a joke chill 😭😭

user3 user1 well tell that to her now we're def not getting that album

user4 HOLY SHIT MOTHER JUST POSTED

yourbff my girl is glowing!! — liked by yn

ynln yourbff 💙💙💙💙 ilysm

user5 ever since she started dating him she rarely posts anything anymore :(

user6 user5 does it matter? like she said she's enjoying life and she looks happy with him so what's the problem

user2 lewis being in this post twice oh she's so in love with him

user2 user2 god when is it my turn to be happy

user5 idec about the album anymore 😭😭 she looks so content and that's all that matters

rachelzegler the cutest!!!!

naraaziza beautiful ❤️❤️

lewishamilton when did you take the last picture i didn't even notice?

ynln lewishamilton when you were too busy staring at other girls

user6 ynln LMFAO

user7 ynln do u want me to fight him

lewishamilton ynln baby please

ynln lewishamilton 🙄🙄🙄🙄

user8 ynln GAG HIM

user8 if i was dating sir lewis hamilton i would abandon my career too

user9 user8 ikr who needs a job when your bf is a millionaire

ynln user8 nothing's abandoned babe :)

user8 ynln WAIT WHAT

user10 ynln YN WHAT DOES THIS MEAN

user11 ynln EVERYBODY STAY FUCKING CALM

user12 ynln not her teasing us 😭😭

user13 ynln not the ":)" is everything a joke to u

user14 ynln STOP PLAYING WITH MY FEELINGS PLS WE NEED THE ALBUM

user15 user14 FR IT'S BEEN 84 YEARS YNLN PLEASE 😭😭

lewishamilton just made a post!

liked by charles_leclerc, michaelbjordan and 1,028,462 others

tagged roscoelovescoco and ynln

lewishamilton a much needed getaway

view all 4,927 comments

ynln 💙💙💙💙 i love u

lewishamilton ynln i love you more baby

user1 ynln lewishamilton god idk how many me and who i got left in me

user2 user1 if they ever broke up i will never believe in love again

user3 user2 the standard fr

mercedesamgf1 do u guys need a third

user4 merdecesamgf1 HELP 😭😭

user5 mercedesamgf1 ADMIN??????

user6 mercedesamgf1 admin is just like me fr

user7 mercedesamgf1 dont u guys have better things to do like idk, fix those fuck ass cars? — liked by ynln

user8 OMG ROSCOE

user9 hey sir lewis is your gf single

danielricciardo did you guys try the restaurant i suggested?

lewishamilton danielricciardo yes! the food was incredible mate thank you

user10 danielricciardo lewishamilton 344 interaction in the years of our lord 2024 this was not on my bingo card

user11 can you pls tell yn to get her ass to that studio her fans are starving 🙏🏼 — liked by lewishamilton and ynln

user12 user11 yk what else we need? a xnda comeback 🙏🏼 — liked by ynln

user13 user12 OMG YES

user11 user12 LEWIS LIKED YOUR COMMENT OH MY GOD????

user12 user11 AND YN AS WELL WHAT IS GOING ON

twitter!

ynln just made a post!

liked by livkatecooke, chappellroan and 3,837,930 others

ynln "joyride" single and mv out 11.2 co-written and featuring the one and only xnda aka lewishamilton 🧡🧡 told u guys i'm not abandoning anything ;)

view all 11,638 comments

user1 JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I JUST WOKE UP

user2 YN WHAT THE HELL

user3 FINALLY

user4 QUEEN OF POP IS BACK

user5 CO-WRITTEN AND FEATURING WHO??????

lewishamilton you're fucking killing it babe 🧡

ynln lewishamilton ilysm baby thank u for agreeing to be part of this 🫶🏼🫶🏼

user7 SCREAMING CRYING SHAKING THROWING UP

user6 WE ARE SO MF BACK

rkive can't wait!

ynln rkive i love u!!

user8 rkive ynln bts x yn ln collab when

user8 she's coming for her third grammy already i can feel it

alex_albon ready to have it on repeat!

georgerussell63 let's go!

twitter!

lewishamilton just made a post!

liked by iamhalsey, megantheestallion and 7,638,927 others

tagged ynln

lewishamilton joyride by ynln feat. xnda is out now 🧡 me and yn have always wanted to make a song together but my own insecurity halted us from releasing it. we got the idea for joyride while on our roadtrip in italy and i originally did the demo and was only supposed to co-write with yn but my lady convinced me to fully be part in this and how could i say no? thank you for believing in me, my love. i am so proud of you 🧡

view all 45,173 comments

ynln baby 🧡🧡🧡🧡 i love u so much thank you for agreeing to be part of this it means a lot to me

lewishamilton ynln anything for you sweetie 🧡

user1 lewishamilton ynln i'm gonna sleep on the highway tonight

ynln user1 pls don't do that the album is coming out in three months

user1 ynln EXFUCKINGSCUSE ME@!-!&!#;#!

user2 ynln WE'RE ACTUALLY GETTING AN ALBUM??????

ynln user1 user2 ;)

georgerussell63 banger!

lewishamilton georgerussell63 thanks mate!

user3 yn could ask lewis to jump into a volcano and he'd do it

ynln user3 don't tempt me

user3 ynln HELP

user4 we love a supportive boyfriend

user5 god i've seen what you've done to others

user6 love the bonnie and clyde theme and roscoe cameo 🙏🏼

user7 "my lady" "my love" "sweetie" god i'm so painfully single

tomcruise amazing!

maxverstappen1 i still can't believe you can sing

lewishamilton maxverstappen1 believe it

twitter!

[britneyshakespeare]

there’s something so surreal, sometimes. when you remember that donald trump was a relatively non-political celebrity for literally DECADES. i mean he was known for being a jerk but in a stereotypical rich guy way. something could be said about the way a certain segment of americans fell head-over-heels for someone who was never beloved or in any way viewed as “relatable” or “in touch” with the average person, but since he could be seen as (if you squint, and then just close your eyes completely) someone with “good business sense”... that could persuade him all the way to the presidency with a cult following who view him as a messiah, but i’m not touching that. 

trump was just really famous. a reality tv star. one of the elite 80s new york types. he wasn’t many people’s favorite celebrity, and those who stereotypically would’ve loved him 15-to-30 years ago would’ve done so for different reasons than people stereotypically love him now. i mean, naturally. becoming president is a big change in role, occupation. his image evolved in the public eye, even though it was his former celebrity status and brand reputation that allowed him to launch his political career. because of how reviled he rightly was for being a demagogue, a racist, corrupt, etc. it's easy to forget all the old associations his name once had, which were comparatively much simpler and even seemingly benign now. 

but he was THE figure of his scene, at least for people who just consumed popular culture, rather than kept a close eye on, idfk, rich people shit. “trump” was synonymous with “rich people shit” when i was growing up. “rich people shit” and “you’re fired.”

so whenever i’m just out in the wild... goin on a trip consuming old movies, tv, music, books... and i come across the name “donald trump” just out in the wild... it’s always like oh my god... the before time... i remember when “donald trump” meant this... this was all that “donald trump” meant...

[frenchfrywrites]

I have horrible Idia brainrot because of the event and omfg I don’t know what to do cause I don’t wanna clog up your ask box with Idia thirst 😭

I wanna give him the “Best Brother” award and then celebrate it by giving him toe curling, soul sucking, life changing, sheet gripping, back arching, head.

I wanna suck on his balls until they’re red and his dick is leaking like a water hose and he’s sobbing.

I just wanna admire his dick and make him call himself beautiful until I believe him before he can cum. Squeeze and pinch the head of his cock until he’s squealing and squirming.

Thinking of Idia’s pussy too and how happy it would make me to be able to go down on him and lick up all his juices. Shove my tongue into his pussy and suck on his pretty clit until it’s sensitive and throbbing between his legs.

I want him sitting in bed for hours afterwards just thinking about what happened and getting horny all over again. I want to change the course of his life with my dick idec if that’s possible or not. This isn’t even all my thoughts don’t get me started on the kind of bondage he’d be into, piss play, monster!reader who can fulfill his hentai fantasies, even just playing with his chest 😩

I literally can’t do anything rn all I can think about is Him

no no no do NOT get me having more brainrot Abt Idia please I'm begging u ahhhh (jk!!! Let's fucking get into it!!!!)

First of all, I'm obsessed with you, and I love you for sharing all of this with me, because I am completely on board with all ur brainrot. Idia deserves all of this and more!! He could literally be sitting there, having not showered for days, looking greasy as hell and I'd still want to suck his dick at the drop of a hat..

Give him that soul sucking head.. suck him off for hours (with breaks of jerking him off so u don't get jaw pain hxbsja💀), working orgasm after orgasm out of him until he's empty!! And even then you should keep going!! Make him give you a couple of dry orgasms until he full on passes out and then u can give him very sweet n nice aftercare 🥰

Plus omg Idia's pussy.. I just know he's a squirter I just know it!! So get ready cause it's going to get messy when you're eating him out 😈🤤 and his clit would be so sensitive too omg.. argghh and his pussy would be so cute and he'd be so shy of it for whatever reason, but even tho he's blushing and squirming under you, he still tries to push your face between his legs

Now I know u said don't get you started on monster reader and Idia... But I just know hed be feral having a monster partner and I'm just going to leave it at that (for now 👀)

[stormyoceans]

gun would have absolute insane chemistry with literally anyone they pair him with but still i would die for a prequel to not me, black and todd and whatever happened between them before they started trying to end each other (but not being able to) or any other show with sing and gun i'm never losing hope idec

every day i look into the mirror and tell myself i don't need or want a second season for any BL and every day i lie through my god dam teeth because i know full well that if they gave me any kind of not me related content i would forgive and forget and eat that shit up like a starving woman

just think about how good it would be to have a second season that's more focused on black!!!!! a second season that works both as a sequel AND a prequel, following black as he still fights every day against the corruption in their society because that's not something that ended with tawi's fall, except these days he's pretty much working alone, the gang going their separate ways after everything that happened. then something BAD happens, like idk, maybe that dude who threatened dan that one time gaining a lot of political power in the upcoming elections or something, and suddenly todd is out of the coma and sitting in black's apartment like nothing happened trying to convince black they need each other's help to stop that guy from actually getting elected. of course black refuses at first, but eventually they make a deal and black ends up bringing the gang back together, and while this happens we also get flashbacks of black and todd growing up - falling in love and falling apart - and also of black meeting everyone and forming the gang the first time around. there are just so many things we don't know about the past!!!!! and so many things the show left open!!!!! the potential is there!!!!!

and like.. im not so delusional as to think something like that will ever happen with not me, however im with you on this, they will literally have to pry the hope for a singgun BL from my cold dead hands!!!!!!! or whatever, if they don't want to do a BL im fine with a lakorn where they play a pairing (like guy and papang in p.s. i hate you but like.. with more focus on them), i will take ANYTHING!!!!!!! THE PEOPLE (you and me) WANT IT!!!!!!!!!!

[skinnylegend-inthemaking]

i hate my brain so fucking much. i hate it i hate it i hate it. this stupid fucking brain of mine is USELESS the fuck does it take up space in my head for. i cant focus for shit. all it does is focus on my current obsessions. like get a fucking grip !!!! i'm fucking failing school bc it won't focus on anything else than grown ass men playing minecraft, a 23 year old w a deep voice who plays among us, a bunch of fucking 2d characters, and how i'm gonna possibly lose weight. i literally can't focus on school bc i'm constantly thinking abt those 3 fucking things instead. my god i know my parents regret me. a whole fuck up who can't focus on things her brain isn't obsessed w and just forgets to do shit. seriously, WHAT do i have to offer ??? i cant do shit w my life bc i'm not GOOD at anything. and now ??? now i cant get a job bc i can't focus on school. HOW am i gonna move out at 18 then ???? i srsly am gonna go into the real world, realize i have zero abilities, work a 9-5 or work 3 separate jobs, and then become homeless and die from a common cold, bc god knows my body doesn't know how to properly fight that shit. ughhhh i wish i simply never used the internet. or i got diagnosed with SOMETHING and they could give me some kind of pills to focus. idec if the side effect were to make me gain weight (jk i would care very much) but i don't wanna keep disappointing my mother cause she's so sweet and although she has her moments, she shows that she cares for me somewhat. grrrr why couldn't my brain choose to obsess over my grades and studying ??? that would've been more useful than knowing the fucking dream smp lore or what type of cologne corpse wears (at least 2 years ago)

[witchysleepingbeauty]

Hi princess! So imagine this lady who's always ALWAYS being negative abt her kids, never a kind word and only belittling, every other day, like "what did I do wrong really? What kind of kids have I raised? They're bla bla bla" with venom. And worst who doesnt acknowledge how negative + painful she is

When i try to talk to her nd ask her exactly whats the issue with 'me' or how can I help her to ease her burden as she keeps complaining how we're ungrateful or keeps comparing to other 'more acceptable in her eyes" children, she gets defensive nd won't answer properly. She says "ohhh, why don't U know that? arent u old enough to know?' and then starts ranting. when time after time ive begged her to clearly tell me, no passiv agressiveness please! it doesn't work nd i end up wondering why i even bother when im only the villain... Yes this ig is my role in her story that ive writen? confusing 😅

when I can, sometimes i try to help her even tho shes the sort who likes to stay busy so she'll find smth else to do lol, nd inside hope for her to be at least a little NOT negative today.... she either ignores or gets angrier nd goes all "hey, I didn't ask U to do that! How dare u act like u did me a favor! U think ur perfect while im just ur servant right?" when i never even intend that? i effing HATE negative reinforcement nd i feel so damn bad for her, nd shes taught me how negative reinforcement is the worst thing to use, cuz it never teaches anything only builds resentment!!

this is smth i realised that she cant be pleased, she wants to get attention what I mean is, whenever we spend time together, she is perfectly fine when we're talking abt her hobbies nd interests which tbh im NOT that interested in personally but since she likes them i like to discuss them with her nd help her out with projects. not to say "ohhh im so cool i help out with her projects look at me so kind of me! lol" its just it hurts when ur own mother doesn't even rpetend to care abt ur interests. i suspect deep down i carried this feeling of unworthiness ie if even my own mother doesn't care abt my hobbies/projects, no one will . which is why i feel so uncomfortable sharing anything personal to my rl friends cuz im so afraid theyll reject me too :(

By not caring i dont mean I expect her to listen nonstop to me. she has her own life but i mean she purposely zones out, rolls her eyes which HURT SM when i was a child, or even worst she says "im not interested" nd shuts the convo. again, at this point, idec anymore as ive learned slowly to value nd cherish my own value nd hobbies etc which is an important lesson anyway

the only thing i want is to stop her being so painfully negative LOUDLY. Yk I suspect becuz of her dwelling on whats wrong in her life, shes gotten severe numbness nd swelling in one arm? and even the doctors cant detect whats wrong! nd its hella painful nd she can't even lift it up sometimes!!!! THIS GOES ON TO SHOW HOW INNER CONSTANT NEGATIVITY CAN BE REFLECTED IN THE OUTER AKA OUR BODY!! To anyone else who cant help have negative thoughts ONLY, u gotta try to change them! Please! Bcuz my mother's pain in her arm is sometimes crazily too much! Nd this in turn, esp on days where all i hear is her gripe, its worse at night!

Anyway I was compeled to write this as a while ago i went to the kitchen for water nd from her room i heard her loudly complain nd mutter abt how her kids are "socially unacceptable" nd "dear god i pray please please don't let me rely on them in old age, i made a mistake raising them!" She's the sort whos got so many limiting beliefs that initially led to my deep unhappiness w/o knowng it was these beliefs at play eg if you dont become a certain career, youll have no security, or recently she keeps nd keeps lamenting abt not havjng 'enoufh money' (we r having kinda financial crisis due to some rlly terrible decisions by my other parent) or 'oh Im STUCK with this [bad word] family!" when she saw a movie abt someone who went on a trip nd began comparing her own life to it. She's so talented we all ask her to start an online business but she backs away nd says 'how will i ever get capital? im doomed to never have what i want' nd I myself have a bit empty wallet temporarily so i cant help her. Nyway, while im trying to fix my own beliefs, seeing her rage nd let negativity completly take over her is alarming nd worrying to me. it makes me feel negative emotions too. im not entirely confident in mastering my mind ywt. i was that overly sensitive kid at school nd i absorv her energy a lot. Those who u love the most, hurt u the most. nd i agree bcoz while im hurt by her (not that shes intentionally hurting me. THRU her im hurt), i do love her. Nd now thanks to the law ik by changing my beliefs abt things, i can change the world

My reason is i cant change her bcuz she gets hella maddened if i suggest a less negative thought. Nd she instead starts blaming me for my 'decisions in Life' which SHE would NEVERRR make oh no... -_- Nd im not saying i try to be obnoxious abt it hell no! im talking abt getting frustrated at the table talking abt smth abt a random topic, then suddenly listening to her start complaining abt e g. Some kid whos "richer" than i am heatedly! nd if i steer the convo away, nope, she keeps fuming a bit

so since i can only change myself, how the hell do i change my assumptions of her? i affirm having a great mother, happy nd open with her thriving business etc. i affirm this but i cant focus cuz doing so inevitbly makes me sad lol cuz i rmmbr how happy nd liveky she used to be before some unfortunate things in our family that started yrs ago. Which affected us all. Any advice, please? im on a mental diet hwoever the earlier incident of her complaining abt us again caused smth in me to snap. im distancing myself from her but the short times im with her there's only a strong air of disapproval, pain nd misery around her. Tbh i was like that pre-law, not knowing how destructiv my thoughts were, while she was the happy optimistic grateful one. Nd now? Im only slightly more self aware than before ie im NOT saying im able to rise in consiousness SOo much that im 'untouchable' nd buddha-like! Nor is my mom wrong bcuz she's me pushed out! its only her lvl of conciousness nd thats it. its just I don't want to cause or feel more pain or hav any excuse to curse her ,when ego sometimes takes over, anymore. im having some personal issues to take care of too, which is why this is affecting me too much. Sort of like having a weak immune system already?

I want my happy intelligent mom back. ik i got to change me... but the doing is way harder than the saying

🫀anon

Okay first of all imma say it cause I don’t think nobody else will…. Your mom is shitty…. There, I said it. She is abusive and selfish and a bad mom. No parent should ever treat their children that way and make them think they need to fix them.

Other than that yes it’s true she is your manifestation but I think it’s important to let emotions out. Be mad at her for once, stop rationalizing her bad behavior. You have the right to feel mad, angry, sad. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID.

I know it seems impossible to keep a mental diet when you see the negative behavior you wish to change every day. I assume you live in the same house. My suggestion is to stick to your mental diet and try to interact as little with her as possible. Go out more often or stay a bit more in your room. Every time you see a behavior from her that you don’t like, and you feel like affirming doesn’t help, close your eyes and see her hugging you and telling you all sorts of beautiful, loving things you’d like to hear from her.

You should also work on your self concept. Parental issues often manifest from poor self concept. Affirmations like “I am worthy, I am loved, I am enough, I am respected, I am cherished” work amazing.