#idc if it's bad or not how you picture it
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okay i probably should not go down this rabbit hole but i think i deserve to do some andreil proposal/wedding headcanon because who cares!!
this is going to be inspired by these three posts because i cannot stop thinking about them
also the usual disclaimer: if this is bad or goes against your own personal headcanon....so be it<3
when andrew finally accepts that this is a THIS, he and neil do not talk about The Future
both of them know how quickly things can change and how you can't plan for anything in life because shit happens and life isn't fair and people always hurt you...so they just keep living in the present
but after a while it kind of becomes clear that neither one of them is going anywhere, even though neither of them actually believes it
more than that, they keep running into problems
like when neil plays a game for Court and ends up getting crunched against the wall and has to go to the ER and andrew has no idea where they took him because he wasn't fast enough to follow him and then when he finally gets to the hospital no one will let him back there and then when he almost attacks a nurse, kevin finally intervenes and lays on the charm to get the two of them back there to see him
and when they finally get in the room, neil is knocked the fuck out and that's when andrew decides that yeah fuck that we can't keep doing this
he doesn't tell neil he's decided this because neil will probably argue or try to run or come up with a bunch of excuses or worse he'll say yes
andrew asks renee for advice, and she doesn't make a big deal out of it because she knows that's the best way to get andrew to not want to do anything
so she decides to be casual
and by casual she actually just tells andrew that she had a conversation with katelyn that sounded like she and aaron were maybe thinking about getting engaged soon
andrew picks up his phone, intending to ask neil right there, but renee stops him and forces him to reconsider this proposal to at least do it in person
even so, there isn't a lot of fanfare
neil can sense something is off immediately when andrew walks in the door but he doesn't push him because he knows that's not the best way to get anything out of andrew
andrew won't look at him at all, doesn't say a word, just sits down next to him on the couch
neil: "drew?"
andrew:
neil:
andrew: "i don't want to wait for kevin to get me to you"
neil doesn't really know what he's even talking about, so he just kind of stares at him, waiting
andrew, actively staring at the wall: "this is not going to be some kind of fairytale shit and i refuse to get down on one fucking knee so yes or no?"
neil, finally having his lightbulb moment: "don't ask stupid questions"
andrew rolls his eyes because of course he'd get stuck with this one: "yes or no, junkie"
neil: "i already told you. it's always yes with you."
andrew: "this is different"
neil: "not the way i see it"
andrew: "this means no running away"
neil: "i stopped running a long time ago"
andrew really is going to kill this guy one day
they don't discuss real details until a few days later when neil asks if they have to have a "real" wedding or if they can just go to a courthouse and getting the papers signed
andrew was under the impression that that WAS a real wedding and thus it was the only thing they would be doing regardless
the two of them settle on a date — only a few days out because hey, might as well just get it done because "who knows the next time some fuckface is gonna kick your ass and land you in the hospital"
at first they decide they aren't going to tell anybody, but then renee asks andrew if he ever actually talked to neil and so she becomes the only person to know about this weird wedding thing
she keeps trying to convince them to tell everybody else, but that does not go over well
neil decides it's probably best if he dresses kind of nice for his wedding (even though he's a thousand percent certain that andrew is just gonna show up in his usual attire) and since he doesn't want to tell nicky what's going on (for everyone's sake), he calls wymack instead thinking he can just vaguely ask a few questions and wymack'll stay out of his business
wymack: "somebody better be dead for you to be calling me this late"
neil: "what are you supposed to wear to a wedding?"
wymack: "who the hell is getting married?"
neil: "me"
wymack: "are you fucking with me?"
neil: "andrew is sick of asking kevin to get him into my hospital rooms"
wymack: "maybe if you stopped going to the fucking hospital—"
even though neil didn't think he needed wymack there, he unexpectedly asks if coach'll be his best man.....and even though wymack is so sick of these idiot kids shortening his life-span, he can't help but say yes
so that is how the four of them end up at the courthouse, waiting for the judge to make it all official
that is, until andrew gets a phone call
neil doesn't see who it is when he picks up, he just watches andrew as he answers straightfaced
andrew: "we're at the courthouse....getting married.......coach is here.....no."
the others look at each other, but andrew keeps staring at the wall ahead of him
neil nudges his knee: "who was that?"
andrew: "nicky"
#the way i literally forgot i wrote this THREE YEARS AGo#its been in my drafts since Jun 18 2021#and i just read it and actually it's fantastic i need to publish this#idc if it's bad or not how you picture it#i just think i'm fucking hilarious#aftg#aftg hc#andreil#it's COACH IS HERE for me#this is absolutely sending me i'm so sorry you have to witness this
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im ngl i think my favorite headspace to be in is "want to be annoying"
#i am also really low energy today so i cant really do my normal expressions of it#(spam messaging Everyone i want to talk to at any given moments notice; sending random pictures/asks/etc to ppl)#but i also like. love being annoying. idc how others feel about it. there's something so wonderful to me about being such a nuisance to ppl#u like that they roll their eyes when you post your random thoughts AGAIN#there's something so lovely about pushing peoples buttons (within reason)#there's something just so fun about being ANNOYING!!!!!#ugh#i think it may genuinely be impossible for anyone to make me hate myself with mean words now#i think about it a lot and ppl can be really mean and it'd make me sad ofc if people were mean to me#butalso like#every person who is mean to me for silly reasons or bc they wanna take me in bad faith; every hateful thing thats been said to me - its all#jokes. my screen name on discord in a couple different servers is nicknames over stuff thats ACTUALLY been said to me#i think weirdly fondly of the man who yelled out to me on my birthday last year “fat bitch” fromhis car not bc he's a good man (fuck him)#but bc yeah that hurt my feelings alittlein the moment - and then after i was like wait why? i AM a fat bitch! its one of my favorite thing#and every time soemone hates something abt me i just kinda learn to love it out of spite#anyway all of this is 2 sy: mutuals if u read this im holdin my finger 2cm frm your cheek going “IM NOT TOUCHING U” & giggling abt it c:
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they could not have chosen ANY MORE different games to make this point
#snap chats#IM CRYING THO 1.) KIRBY AND KIRYU IN THE SAME PICTURE YIPPEEEEE#2.) I JUST SNORTED BEING REMINDED OF THE TIME I SPECIFICALLY REFERENCE KIRBY BEING ANGRIER#IN RESPONSE TO THAT ONE ASK MASU SENT ABOUT SAWASHIRO#AND HOW HE WAS PORTRAYED MORE AGGRESSIVELY IN THE STATES LIKE JAER JERLKAJ#also omg y3... hi lovr...#idc i love the Unreasoanbly Edgy USification of box art it appeals to the shadow the hedgehog lover in me#oh yeah. also. i got here in the first place cause my desperate ass WAS looking up how much itd cost to buy physical discs#and i stumbled on the jp box art of y7 and its so fuckin funny but like i also get it but also lol#CAUSE YK ON THE ART YOUVE GOT NANBA/ARAKAWA/SAWASHIRO LIKE. SPECIFICALLY FRAMED YEAH#on one hand i get it from the approach of 'oh hey you guys know these actors right check it'#and then theres also the approach of 'these three characters will cause SOME form of major conflict for ichi'#BUT ITS JSUT SO FUNNY LIKE nanba so tf are you doing there. come back here.#like at least for most of the game arakawa's suspicious but nanba chills with us for like. ok only like four chapters BUT STILL#the cover also makes me laugh cause of arakawa cause like. Perpetual Peepaw Syndrome IM SORRY HE JUST LOOKS CUTE#like pops you are not fooling anyone.. you cannot intimidate me im sorry.... ily...#funny as hell...#ok im gonna try drawing now fr bye#i hope my bitchass friend gets back to me soon i wanna play y3 on stream so bad...#i could try from my laptop but its SOOO slow. like its consistent but its like playing in slow motion#so id prefer to see if i could play it on my ps4 and then use my capture card to stream it to computer yk..#ok im rambling again BYE
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so it turns out it was actually never that serious
#the exam literally went fine what the fuck just happened i feel like i just hallucinated that#like im not one of those people that go 'omg i did soooo badly :(' just to come out with top grades if i say it's going to shit#then it's becuase i genuinely wholeheartedly believe it#and my headspace before this exam was the worst it's been in MONTHS like i havent felt that bad for an exam since first year#and i sat down opened the paper and. remembered everything. like i literally just Knew the answers#im not saying ive passed bc am i fuck about to jinx it and i was still riding mainly blind bc i have NO idea where that knowledge came from#but at the very least there was a 35 marker that i KNOW i aced like i could picture the exact lecture slides it wanted me to discuss#and i had all of them memorised so at the very least ive got like. 30 marks. which is enough for me to pass the module#bc this exam is only weighted 75% and with my marks from the other 25% i only needed like 20 marks to pass this exam#which... makes it even more embarrassing that i failed it the first time but whatever!!!!#oh my god im so glad that's done im so happy IM FREE#just been in the kitchen dancing around to my little tunes and texting my friends <3#im meeting up with one of them when she gets off work at 5 and we're going for drinks#so ive got until then to nap and chill and then ill go to the shop and get us some food and wine#and she's gonna come here for a bit & then we'll go. like actually look at me. im having people over at MY HOUSE im going out to buy us WIN#im literally a functioning adult living independently who IS she a misty memory#alas i do only have £23 in my account so this is gonna be such a slay seeing how i make that stretch for a night out#i acc could budget for england when it comes to alcohol i think like the way i manage to have a good funky time with MINIMAL funds#is downright impressive. it's a skill idc what you say#hella goes to uni
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⋆⭒˚.⋆ walk him like a dog - 𝐋𝐍𝟒 𖤓
( 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 )𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗂𝗌 𝗑 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋
( 𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒 )𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗇 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗇 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗐𝖺𝗅𝗄 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝖺 𝖽𝗈𝗀
🝮
yn posted a story
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landonorris cmon love 💔
charles_leclerc replied to your story
Just let him have this one
lilymhe replied to your story
the hand placement??? 👁️👁️
↳ yn you don’t wanna know how many times i tried to move it
hearts4lando replied to your story
this is so cute
alexandrasaintmleux replied to your story
I want what you and lando have
↳ yn don’t even 😭
carlossainz55 replied to your story
JUST DATE ALREADY PLEASE
🝮
landonorris posted a story
replies
maxfewtrell replied to your story
your like her little puppy dog
↳ landonorris idc as long as im hers
yn replied to your story
stop this madness
↳ landonorris you know you like it babe
francisca.cgomes replied to your story
absolutely down bad
↳ landonorris always for her
charles_leclerc replied to your story
No photo credit?
↳ landonorris no you kept call me her little bitch the whole time…
↳ charles_leclerc Did I lie?
🝮
f1wags
liked by landonorris and 383,072 others
f1wags Lando Norris and Yn were see getting cozy on the beach earlier today, what do we think about this? 👀
estiebestie NOT LANDO LIKING THIS 💀💀
yn NO NO NO LET ME TELL ME SOMETHING
⤷ landonorris do tell
⤷ yn ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE I SWEAR
hoeforsainzzz UHM HIS HAND HELLO?
lovely.leclerc friends definitely don’t get that touchy with each other 🫣
⤷ landowantrizz and they definitely don’t look at each other that 🤨
landolovesyn this is the norm for them 😭
beloved.hamilton Stop that’s so cute 🥹
sharls_lerklerk shes the nonchalant, wears the pants in the relationship, in between black swan & white swan, knows she can get whatever she wants out of him gf and he’s the chalant, will do whatever she says, puppy dog, putty in her hand with one look, can never say no, baby girl bf
⤷ yn no 👎🏽🚫🙅🚮
🝮
daniel3.jpg
liked by maxverstappen1 and 925,082 others
daniel3.jpg to feed your soul
landonorris my girl
⤷ yn no stop
yn delete this now
⤷ landonorris cmon babe you know you want me as bad as i want you
⤷ hearts4lando HELLO? lando norris is the standard
lilymhe what’s that thing doing with me kika and alex’s girl
⤷ francisca.cgomes little lando thinks he can bag our girl 🤣🤣
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux he just doesn’t know when to quit
⤷ yn i know where home is 😘
⤷ charles_leclerc hello??
⤷ alex_albon i can’t do this anymore.
⤷ pierregasly tell me about it
charlesismyman69 HAND PLACEMENT IS EVERYTHINGGGG 🫦
landolovesyn they act like a couple but yn is playing SO HARD to get 😭
ethereal.yn i’m patiently waiting for lando to just hard launch one of these days (im going insane i can’t wait any longer)
⤷ landonorris same
🝮
landonorris
liked by carlossainz55 and 5,924,173 others
landonorris my girl, my girl, my girl ♥️ this one goes out to all you bitches that doubted me, that said i could never get someone as beautiful as yn, that told me to move on, that said i could never get her, to everyone who ever called me lando norizz i hope you bitches are weeping right now.
yn damn
⤷ landonorris you know your blushing right now don’t even
♥︎ by yn
danielricciardo Bro got the girl
⤷ oscarpiastri After 4 years
⤷ carlossainz 4 years of yappin about her
hearts4lando ik lando already bought that ring 😭
⤷ lando.norizz he’s probably had it for a few years now let’s be honest
pierregasly getting freaky on the main?
⤷ landonorris always
landolovesyn MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED 🙏🏽🙏🏽
estiebestie just fell to my knees in the middle of walmart
⤷ landonorris same
littlelandonorris lando norris the man that you are
landowantsrizz the second picture HELLOOO? 😭
⤷ lilac.leclerc the second picture? WHAT ABOUT THE FIRST PICTURE???
sharls_lerklerk i’ve been here since they first met at silverstone 😭
🝮
yn
liked by zendaya and 18,024,795 others
yn my little bitch, forever & always babygirl ♥️
landonorris it’s like your life goal is to make me look like a fan
⤷ yn are you not my little bitch?
⤷ landonorris i’m whatever you want me to be baby
⤷ yn that’s what i thought
lilymhe 🐕🐕🐕
francisca.cgomes can’t believe this man child took my woman
⤷ landonorris I WON
alexandrasaimtmleux so cute…i guess
landonorris damn girl why your feet so sexy 🫦😘🥜🤤🍆🍑
carlossainz55 I thought you two getting together would mean he would finally shut up about you…I thought wrong.
⤷ oscarpiastri You think you have it bad?
ynissocutiepatootie y/n heard “walk em like a dog” once and took it to another level
hoeforsainzzz lando norris is the definition of dedication
landocanrockmyworld i love how she makes him look so tall 😭
ynownsme y/n y/l/n you will always be famous 😭
#lando norris x reader#lando norris#f1 smau#lando norris smau#lando norris fluff#lando norris imagine#f1 imagine
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Imagine the overbloat gang as fathers or like proud/panicking that their s/o is having a child and they don't know what to do
Imagine the gang trying to give their kids a goid life and getting baby fever like who wouldn't because the kid is literally a mixed of him and you and they gush about how much they love their s/o and children like ???????
Overbload gang as fathers and i will start violently sob
I do have a weakness for familial headcanons :) future au time??
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ as fathers
type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, leona, azul, jamil, vil, idia, malleus additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral (no mentions of the child's origins), reader is not specified to be yuu, obviously takes place in the future
I think Riddle is one of the most reluctant to have children
for years he was strictly against them. his excuses were always that children are messy, unruly, his career, his relationship with you... but he was mostly just afraid of turning into his mother
as he gets older and forms his own identity, though, he realizes that it takes a lot of intentional effort to fuck up a child like his mom did, and he changes his mind
I can see him with... maybe two kids
he would never want an only child. after all, the bonds he made with his peers are what kept him going
he is a pretty good parent overall. maybe a little to focused on bedtimes and table manners, but the kids don't seem to mind
Trey and Che'nya babysit often (and it's always disastrous)
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
talking Leona into the idea of fatherhood is like diffusing a bomb with a blindfold on. the guy won't even JOKE about it
if you do end up with a kid, it's unplanned, whether that be pregnancy or baby left on the doorstep
but he makes a surprisingly(?) good father. defo a girl dad, he would spoil a daughter rotten. lets her beat the daylights out of Neji because that's his little princess :)
parenting is really not as scary as he thought it was going to be
he has "I'm just resting my eyes" *falls asleep for 8 hours on the reclining chair in the living room* dad energy
the hardest part?
pretending to like vegetables in front of the kid to set a good example
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Azul would actually be an awesome dad idc. IDC!
he has a good relationship with his mom and stepdad (who definitely babysit all the time; they insist on it), so he has good role models
he's not even worried about how it'll affect his career! Azul has a "do it all" personality: businessman, entrepreneur, father, aspiring millionaire...
and he is so overprotective
he'd cover that kid in bubble wrap if you'd let him
but he's really more concerned about their feelings. sending them to school is much harder than closing a business deal
he's a little sensitive, but he knows he'll have to trust them eventually
P.S. the tweels are NOT allowed to babysit. bad influences
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Jamil. ohhh Jamil :(
kids were never on the table for him, even after he met you and fell in love, he just... couldn't imagine it
regardless of whether or not he and his family are in a better place. (for the sake of this story, let's pretend they are. I want him to be happy) he just has so much generational trauma that he knows the child will end up with some, anyway
when, if, he's ready, it will still be a tough process. but worth it
he's such a supportive dad. bragging about his child at any chance, definitely the kind of dad to show everyone the baby pictures without being asked
it gets embarrassing for them as they grow, but he doesn't care
he thinks they're the greatest thing ever, and people should know that!
he is so proud
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Vil had always wanted to play a father on screen, but once he hits that age, he starts thinking about real life, too
he's gotten where he wants to be, after all: he's still young, he's in love, and his career, as successful as it is, is starting to wind down. so, why not?
he is the most supportive partner you could ask for. despite his schedule, he's involved in everything (yes, even the messy stuff)
he's got a customized baby bjorn and everything
I can see him with... one. just one is enough for him. he also has girl dad energy. he's already looking forward to playing princesses and letting her do his makeup (terribly, of course)
he knows his child will grow to have their own wants and thoughts and personality, and he's supportive. besides, if he has another Epel on his hands, he'll know how to handle them
just... gentler, this time
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
for you, anon, I will enterain the idea that Idia may someday reproduce. but there's still a 50% chance that kid is a robot
joking (kind of)
I don't think he'd even really want kids. considering his own unhappy childhood and the whole curse of his bloodline thing. but, like the others, he can be convinced!
I think he'd make a pretty good father, tbh. neurotic, sure, but he's not too clingy, nor too distant
whatever kids he has will be smart, and he trusts them. he likes teaching them nerdy stuff, too (finally, someone he can infodump to!!!)
he probably ends up with more than he'd think. 2 or 3
as long as you never bring up how cringe he was in college, he's rather mature and prepared for anything
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
out of the whole lineup, Malleus is the the only one to have thought your future children while at NRC. daydreamed, really
I know, not surprising. look at the guy. he's practically kicking his legs back and forth while coming up with baby names in game
it was just a fantasy at first, then you became closer, graduated, got older, and...
Lilia began teasing him about getting grandkids, and Malleus took him quite seriously
he knows he's still young (though, at his age, Lilia was already general), but he doesn't want to wait forever. you both have many long talks on the matter
and end up with... as many children as you can handle, basically
Malleus is somewhat of an awkward father (having been raised by Lilia will do that to you)
but he cares. and he tries! very hard. plus, there's always Lilia, Silver, and Sebek around to lend a hand
#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#queued#riddle rosehearts x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#jamil viper x reader#vil schoenheit x reader#idia shroud x reader#malleus draconia x reader
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Please Please Please
Pairing: Lando Norris x Reader
Warnings: None
Authors Note: this isn't what the poll was for dw lmao | also I've been caught out by lando once again 😭 he's just the best fit for this song
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yourusername
📍Buenos Aires, Argentina
liked by taylorswift landonorris and 2,349,022 others
yourusername Had a great time opening for #TSTheErasTour in Buenos Aires! Muchas gracias, Argentina! 🇦🇷
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user1 so so so pretty 😭
user2 I was there 🥰
user3 loml
user4 I LOVE HER SO MUCH
user5 just looked in the mirror and sighed
user6 my favorite outfit from this leg of the tour
taylorswift 💕
yourusername 💕
user7 I FEEL SO MUCH LIGHTER LIKE A FEATHER WITH YOU OFF MY MIND
user8 that second picture is so adorable I’m screaming 😭😭😭
user9 IM TALKING NONSENSE
user10 new album when???
user11 Lando Norris in the likes??? 😭
user12 wait who is that
user13 an f1 driver 😭
user12 what’s he doing here
user13 idk 😭
user14 Y/N RUN QUICK LANDOS HERE
user15 we can’t let him get her 😭
user16 she’s so pretty I’m in love with her 🫶
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yourusername added to their story
landonorris
🤩🤩🤩🤩
yourusername
🤭🤭🤭🤭
landonorris
I saw you open for Taylor
in Brazil
your were wonderful
yourusername
I’m flattered 🥰
landonorris
I’d be even more flattered if I could take you on a date
yourusername
You usually this confident?
landonorris
No, I’m actually not
yourusername
Well
I’d love to go on a date with you Mr Norris
landonorris
😅 thank god that worked
You ever around Monaco?
yourusername
Not usually
But I could be 😚
I’m off next week <3
landonorris
Perfect
See you then
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yourusername
liked by landonorris jackantonoff and 4,777,008 others
yourusername that’s that me espresso ☕️🩵
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user17 rip sharpay evans you would’ve loved espresso by y/n l/n
user18 it’s actually so good omg
user19 best song ever made fr
user20 love love love
user21 truly that girl
user22 ON REPEAT
user23 I love her more than life
user24 IM WORKING LATE CUS IM A SINGERRRRRR
user25 face card never declines
jackantonoff rly good!
yourusername thanks jacky 🥰
user26 jack x y/n collab when???
user27 Landos back in the likes…
user28 free my girl from the shackles of a man
user29 oh my god is the song about him
user30 they haven’t been seen together in a while so I sure hope not 😭
user31 song of the year
user32 🩵🩵🩵
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yourusername
liked by taylorswift maxfewtrell and 4,000,112 others
yourusername I'm working lateee cuz its my birthdayyy 💛
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user33 how to lose a guy in 10 days dress!!! 💛
user34 💛💛💛
user35 that polaroid looks suspiciously like lando
user36 that could legitimately be anyone
user37 of course but unfortunately she's been seen with him recently so…
user38 not lando…
user39 so pretty 🤩
user40 y'all rly hate lando? That mans been so supportive I legit can't not like him
user41 ikr! I'm a proud lando defender. No reason to hate him.
user42 I love them together idc
maxfewtrell happy birthday!
yourusername thanks max 🫶
user43 still not convinced that's lando
user44 girl.
user45 😍
user46 happy birthday girl!!!
user47 my favorite pop girlie
user48 IM WORKING LATEEEEE
user49 queen 👑
user50 I love lando 💛💛💛
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yourusername
🎵 Please Please Please - Y/N L/N
liked by landonorris maxverstappen and 9,880,771 others
yourusername I know I have good taste
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user51 hardest of hard launches
user52 I LOVE THEM TOGETHER I DONT CARE
user53 favourite couple 💛
user54 gorgeous gorgeous people
user55 LANDOOOOO
user56 lando wasn't even acting in that video that's just how down bad he is
user57 that first pic… 😍
user58 bring your bf to work day
user59 ...okay maybe I like him 🙄
user60 wait hes kinda hot 😭
user61 my royal couple
maxverstappen is lando gonna be an actor now???
yourusername its a good backup plan if the driving thing doesn't work out
landonorris I think I'll leave the acting to you
maxverstappen that's for the best mate
user62 lmao max
user63 they're so pretty 🥰🥰🥰
user64 so it couple core
user65 ATEEEE
landonorris yeah you do 💛
yourusername 🙄💛
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landonorris added to their story
user1
Y'all r so cute
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user2
yeah she is
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user3
😍😍😍😍
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user4
I still don't trust you car boy
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user5
the music video was so good!!!!
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yourusername
I love you 💛
landonorris
love you too 💛
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@casperlikej @evie-119
#scheduled#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 smau#lando norris x you#lando norris fanfic#lando norris fluff#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x female reader#lando norris imagine#lando imagine#lando x reader#lando norris x reader
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i bought one of those hair blinger things hehe
#ive been wanting one for months so i finally bit the bullet like i tried hair tinsel but it was saur hard for me and i just want smth fun#i'm sure my parents will have comments bc we hate FUN in this household and i can't do anything remotely fun with my#hair or outfits without them being like oh... but why but idc i want to be sparkly god damn it and i will be#if it was socially acceptable to wear body glitter every day i would! unfortunately that has it's own difficulties so i don't but i like it#and i think it's fun!#i also need reasons to wear the dress i bought for graduation more often bc i think it's sooo pretty and i actually like how it looks on me#which is a rare thing and my dad didn't take a single flatter picture of me in it :( so i need redemption. i think i'll wear it for my bday#this year but i need more occasions like can someone i know get married or smth can there be a fancy event#like you guys don't understandddddd aside from when i saw those pics i felt so good about myself and i literally never do but that dress...#i was feeling my fantasy fr maybe i actually looked terrible but you could not have told me ANYTHING that day i felt so pretty from#the neck down... the fact that my dad only took pics from a terrible fucking angle AND NOT EVEN HEAD ON and also#only took pics from the neck up when i wasn't wearing my robes... you don't know the actual anguish i felt bc i felt so bad about myself#one day my parents will understand that seeing my face in pictures makes me so unhappy like i think i would see improvement if not#for the dark circles that are never going away bc i've had them since i was little but i also just. don't like my face#and yet we seem to not pick up on that so. i just don't look at pics of myself but the ONE time i wanted pics they turned out bad#and i haven't recovered from it 😭 my friends asked to see pics and i literally had to be like no there aren't any 😁
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TR: ꨄYANDERE ONE NIGHT STAND HEADCANONSꨄ
Sano Manjiro, Hanemiya Kazutora, Sanzu Haruchiyo, & Haitani Brothers x Reader
Characters are 18+
❦Idc how bad you want it, do NOT wake up to these mfs❦
Not fully proofread
MY TR FANDOM WORKS ARE ONLY ON TUMBLR, AO3, AND WATTPAD UNDER EETHEREALGODDESS! REPORT IF YOU SEE IT POSTED UNDER ANYONE ELSE BUT ME!!!
Notice:
✩Y/n is 18+. I picture her as a black female but you can see her however.
✩Some parts of the story may not be realistic or factual. After all, this is a work of fiction.
✩Although it's a dark 'romance,' I do not condone any of the behavior displayed.
✩Dark content such as: gore, violence, triggering topics, graphic scenes, vulgar language, explicit sexual content, etc.
✩There may be scenes that involve non con and/ or dubcon so don’t read if that makes you uncomfortable
✩That being said, this story is for 18+ only.
Enjoy!
Mikey: You didn’t expect to see a man lying next to you in your bed, let alone him being a friend of yours from childhood. You almost didn’t recognize him considering the black hair that’s falling down his back and shoulders. His body curved to the side as you stared in shock at the back of his head. You peeked over and almost cursed when you realized who he was.
You don’t remember the night before but picking the covers up and eyeing both of your naked bodies, you could only hope you had used protection. When you eased off of the bed, you snatched your clothes off the floor. Your eyebrows furrowed at the hoodie and sweats that indicate you hadn’t gone to a bar or club. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t figure out how running into each other would have resulted in the two of you in the same bed.
Once your clothes were on, you rushed to the door to avoid an awkward greeting. You wanted to see if your parents had made it home and noticed anything. Yes, you’re an adult but you still live under your parents roof and they never liked Mikey. They always thought of him as a bad influence which sucked for you because you actually had a little crush on him. They forbade him from the house and at some point made it a rule for you to not be friends anymore.
Having been young, you had to listen. They’re pretty strict so the tracking device prevented you from sneaking around. Honestly, you didn’t have many friendships because of your parents so you would only go to school, home, and occasionally the park. You only recently were allowed to have nights out as long as you paid attention in your college classes. You were scared that your parents would kick you out if they saw the display so you hurried out the door.
The putrid smell of the house slapped your face, a palm going over your nose as your eyes watered. You continue to walk through the hall to the living room, gasping when you see the corpses of your parents. You gagged up vomit, belching and coughing as tears spilled from your eyes. Your body trembles as you drop to your knees, eyeing their unrecognizable faces considering it looks as though their faces were beaten repeatedly, a large gash in the middle of their faces with blood puddling around them.
Having thrown on his black pants, he followed the wails that woke him up. His shoulder leaning against the wall and arms crossed over his bare chest, Mikey’s dark eyes gaze at you from the hall. He hadn’t meant for you to see such a gruesome scene. The pill he put in your drink two nights ago should’ve kept you asleep at least for a few days. He planned to take you home today considering he got carried away the nights before, libido high from the adrenaline rush he had from ridding both of you of the blockage that kept you two apart. He pushed himself off the wall and walked towards you.
Jolting, you looked up at him from your kneeled position with wide eyes. He sets his hand on your head and crouches down.
“You’re gonna be good so I don’t have to knock you out, kay?” Hesitantly, you nod your head. He smiles softly before standing up and holding out a hand for you to take, helping you on your feet as you hold yourself up with shaky legs, gaze stuck on your deceased parents as you walk back to the bedroom.
Kazutora: You pant heavily as moans echoed throughout the room, bucking your hips up as your ex boyfriend’s thrusts meet yours. Your fingers grip his shoulders before wrapping your arms around his neck, his cock aiming deeper inside of your walls as he grinds into you, hitting your g-spot with each rutt. He moans into your ear as he nibbles and sucks your earlobe, one of his hands placed on top of your head as his other hand grips the cushion of the bed.
“Kazu, I’m gonna cum!” You whimper out as you grind harder against him, the head of his cock pounding against the erogenous zone that causes your hands to turn into fists as you throw your head back. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as your back arches.
“Cum on this cock, baby.” His husky voice whispers against your ear as he continues the same pace, purposefully bringing you to an orgasm as you moan loudly, yelling a curse as you hold your hips in place. Suddenly, he pulls back and grabs a hold of your thighs, holding them up before thrusting at a faster pace, his hair draping over as he leans over, your hands gripping his shoulders once more as your mouth hangs open, feet next to your head.
The bed rocks as he roughly thrusts into you, cream oozing out of your pussy and dripping to your ass. You couldn’t help but release shaky moans as he used your pussy to bring himself to an orgasm. Your eyes widen as you watch his expression morph into the familiar look he makes when he’s about to cum.
“Pull out!” You yell as your eyebrows furrow from the overstimulation, hands moving to his chest.
“M’ gonna cum so fucking deep in this pussy.” He moans out, panting as his hips become sloppier, his fingers squeezing your thighs tightly. You yank his hair back in an attempt to pull him out of you only for him to moan out as he thrusts his hips harder, his eyes fluttering closed as his mouth hangs open.
He pressed his cock deep inside you as you felt his seed shoot inside. Both of you moan out as he slowly grinds his orgasm out, you pressing your hips against him as you cream out another orgasm. He lays on top of you as he pushes himself inside you more, holding himself in place to make sure all of his semen has nowhere to go but inside your hole.
“No, no, no! Kazutora, I told you to pull out!” You smack his sweaty back as he breathes deeply against your neck.
“It’s fine.” You both grunt as he pushes inside of you more, his arms hugging around your head.
“No it’s not! Now you have to get me a plan b!”
He sits up as he chuckles before pulling his hips back and shoving into you again before beginning a slow pace. You bite your lip to hold back from moaning.
“Uh, uh. You’re gonna keep it and we’re going to raise it together.” He grins as he holds your legs back up.
“Are you crazy? I have a fiancé now! I can’t get pregnant!” He pins your arms above your head after you try to push him off.
“That’s too bad.” He says before thrusting at a faster pace. He breeds you over and over again the rest of the night, your pussy full of nothing but his sperm.
The next day, you bought a plan b, walking to your car after you left the store. Before you could get in your seat, you were grabbed from behind and pulled into a chest with a knife against your throat.
“Take it and I will slice your neck and kill your fiance after sending everyone in your family the video I took of us last night. Do you understand?” He says softly against your ear. You nod frantically as he takes the bag out of your hand. He pecks your cheek before releasing you.
“Glad we got back together, Y/n. It’ll be good for the baby.”
Ran: You wake up in a penthouse, the huge bedroom displaying a luxury you’ve never seen in person until last night. You were surprised that someone so loaded would go to a run down club such as the place you work at and choose you, a low class stripper, to spend the night with. You wouldn’t normally go home with anyone, but this man was charming and beautiful. You could tell he was expensive just by his demeanor and what he wore. You had no clue why he spotted you, gazing at you when he first walked in. When you made eye contact, you knew it would be a good night.
He made it worthwhile, treating you delicately, all the while pounding into you from behind as his nails left scratch marks all over you. Whispering soft words as he talked you through each orgasm while shoving his cock so hard that your skin smacked loudly against each other. His hold felt good against you, bodies molding together as you gripped the sheets of the bed, his sweat mixing with yours as he thrusts deeply inside of you.
“Work at my club.” He says while tracing your arm as you lie on his bare chest, the morning light seeping through the thin curtains as your legs are tangled together. You didn’t hesitate to accept the offer. Working at his club brought you more money, as well as high end living. You moved out of your grimy apartment to a luxury loft near his penthouse. One of his drivers would give you limitless rides to wherever you had ordered. You made connections and created a better life for yourself, with his help of course. You’re clearly the boss’s favorite, damn near living with him as he always brought you to his home at the end of a work night. Even on your off days you would end up at his place, waking up naked in his bed.
Whenever you had vip performances, there was a no touch policy for you specifically no matter the circumstances. As you rolled your hips against a stranger’s lap, he grabbed your ass and pulled you onto his covered bulge, bucking his hips against you. You yelp as you try to release yourself from the man’s grip, only for him to hold you down and groan. You curse at him before turning and back handing his face.
He shoves you to the ground, standing up from the seat as he hovers over you. He pulls his arm back, ready to land a punch to your cheek. A bang echoed through the room as blood splattered on your face and front body. The man’s headless body pauses before dropping limp on the ground, his jaw hanging as red covers him. You pant as your eyes stare wide at the corpse. Footsteps come towards you from behind as hands reach around your waist and pick you up from the floor.
“Sorry I didn’t come sooner.” He says casually as he leans in to kiss your forehead. “Let’s go home, yeah?” Still gazing at the body oozing blood, you nod your head with a trembling lip. He rubs your back as you both walk out. When you both lied in bed that night, you couldn’t get the man’s headless body out of your mind. Sure, he deserved something bad to happen to him, but the way Ran shot him so effortlessly was a little troubling for you. Regardless of the mixed feelings you held, you couldn’t help the side of you that was excited that a man like him protected you from danger.
“You no longer work at the club. You only work for me.” You were forced to move in with him for ‘your own safety,’ as well as giving all your personal details to him so he can take care of you completely. He paid for everything and even dressed you himself. He really molded you into his perfect doll. You couldn’t really get mad about the lack of freedom considering you had no more worries. In fact you were a little scared that he would give it all up once another stripper caught his eye.
“I could never replace my favorite doll.” With that sentence alone, your whole mindset changed. You realize that what you were receiving wasn’t real. Everything was to mold you into his little object. His toy. You don’t know why it hurt you as bad as it did, but you knew you had to leave.
The next day, you told him, “I think it’d be best if we stopped seeing each other. Our relationship is way past professional and I want my own life back.” He only stares at you as he sits on his office chair, stoic expression as his legs are crossed.
“You’re having a bad day. You should get some rest.” He states. Your eyebrows furrowed.
“No, I’m serious. This needs to end right now.” He stands up from his seat, walking towards you before gently grabbing your chin and wrapping an arm around your waist.
“Are you sure?” He questions. You nod your head, ignoring his affection no matter how bad you wanted it. He releases you before walking back to his seat. He sits down and props his legs on the desk. You froze when you turned to walk away, a gun cocking behind you. You turn your gaze to him in shock and fear.
“Why do you look so scared, Y/n? You wanted this to end, right?” His expression shows a sly smile, elbow resting on the table as he lazily points the gun at you. Keeping his gaze fixed on yours, he leans over the desk, both elbows on the table, placing his feet on the ground.
“Or, were you mistaken?” You couldn’t move, your hairs standing up on your limbs as you breathed heavily. Your body is tense as you eye the barrel of the weapon.
“Were. You. Mistaken?” He reiterated, awaiting a response as his eyes narrowed.
“Y-yes, I made a mistake.” He nodded, “Mhm,” before setting his gun on the desk.
“I’ll meet you in the bedroom for a nap.” He smiled as he waved you off.
Rin: You hadn’t expected the drunken night to go as good as it did. Having been broken up with the day of, you decided to go out and find a random person to take home. Of course, this isn’t something you usually do, but you need something, or someone to distract you.
You had initially walked into the club with your friends by your side, but after a few shots the whole night became blurred, you all losing each other in the process.
The alcohol saved you from the thoughts that wanted to race your mind, instead you searched the crowd for someone who would be the perfect fit for tonight. Coming across a purple mullet, you knew exactly who you wanted. You downed another shot before reaching the upstairs dance floor.
You didn’t really care about anything but getting this stranger in your pants so when you reached him, you tapped his shoulder. You almost change your mind, anxiety forming when you see how attractive he is, though the alcohol in your system keeps you from folding to your insecurities.
“You wanna get out of here?” You question, swallowing your pride as his intimidating gaze locks you in a chokehold. You perk up at his smirk.
“Sure.”
Excitement causes you to grab his arm and pull him out of the club. He informs you of his driver and you allow him to take you to his place. When you both get there, you immediately pounce on him. Your lips drunkenly move against his as his arms wrap around your waist before pulling you into his arms, your legs wrapping around his torso. You make out as he carries you to the couch and sits with you on his lap.
After a couple hours or so, you both ended up in his bedroom, blankets all over the bed as you grind your hips on his face. His hands grip your thighs as you rest your arms on the head board, head back as you groan out. He smacks your ass as he laps up your juices, sucking your clit before flicking it with his tongue. Orgasm after orgasm, you both sloppily give yourselves to one another.
When you woke up the next day, your phone continuously buzzed as a call interrupted your sleep. You groaned as you grabbed the phone and eyed the screen. You sigh once you see your ex’s name. Answering the phone you picked yourself up and used one of the blankets on the floor as a cover up. You glanced at the sleeping purple haired man and walked into his bathroom, closing the door behind you.
The conversation went with your ex manipulating the situation and you falling for it once more, a never ending cycle that you knew could end if you stopped fooling yourself. Hanging up and opening the bathroom door, you weren’t expecting to see Rin sitting up on the bed, half-naked as his body faces you with his feet planted to the ground. You greet him as you put your clothes on.
“Leaving to go back to your toxic ex?” One of your eyebrows raised at him.
“That’s none of your business. Can I please get a ride to my apartment?” He nods as he watches you walk out.
A week has passed and you and your ex are once again back on bad terms. You were on your way to his place to pick your stuff up so it wouldn’t get mixed up with the other women’s items considering he allows them to stay over. When you opened the door, your eyebrows furrowed at the dark living room. He just texted you so you didn’t understand why he wouldn’t be waiting in the living space like he always does.
You gasp when you reach his bedroom doorway, his corpse lying on the floor with blood oozing from a bullet hole in his head, lifeless eyes wide open. You look at the culprit who sits on the bed facing away from you.
“What the fuck?” You breathe out, uncomfortable and terrified from the display. You could recognize the mullet from anywhere. He stands up from the bed with the gun still in hand.
“Let’s go.” He says, expecting you to follow as he walks past you. Because of the gun in his hand, you really didn’t have a choice but to follow if you didn’t want to end up like your ex.
Sanzu: You knew that even if you’re unhappy with your marriage, you probably shouldn’t have cheated. Honestly, it wasn’t anything planned but you really needed the drugs you had bought from the dealer you were recommended. Who knew that the one night stand would turn into an affair. Though there didn’t seem to be any emotional connection on your part nor did it seem like his, you couldn’t stop contacting him and yearning for the pink haired man in more ways than you should for a drug dealer.
You thought what you experienced was normal until you realized you might’ve caught feelings for your dealer. Unfortunately, when you confessed, you were answered with a blank expression as you both smoked weed in his car. You realized how stupid you were to have confessed to someone when you were married so you stopped buying from him. It wasn’t until he showed up at your house and pulled you into a passionate kiss. You continued to make out until you were on the sofa, riding his cock once more as you moaned out his name.
His hands gripping your hips as he thrusted into you from below. One of his hands moved behind your head and pulled you to his shoulder as his other hand wrapped around your waist, aiming his cock deeper to keep hitting that spot that makes your thighs quake in his hold.
“Fuck.” He hissed as you rolled your hips harder, grunting as his grip tightened. “You sure you want this?”
“Uh huh.” You moan out as you nod, head falling back as the sound of your wet pussy squelches around his thick girth. When the sound of the front door clicks open, before you could turn your head around, Sanzu pulls his gun out from the pants that sat beside him and aims it for the intruder.
“No!” You gasp just as the shot rings out. A thud follows as you turn fully to eye your now dead husband.
“Oh my…!” Your head is forced to face Sanzu, the hand free of the gun holding the back of your head as the one holding the weapon wraps around your waist, his thrusts starting again as he purposefully aims deep into your pussy. You moan out as tears fall, the pleasure contrasting with the fear and guilt in your heart. He pulls your forehead against his as he continues to fuck into you.
“This is mine.” He aims the barrel of the gun on your pubis, finger against the trigger. You stare wide eyed into his crazed blue orbs. “Only mine, got it?” You nod as he removes the gun and replaces the arm back around your waist.
He continues until you both reach your orgasms, riding them out against each other as you lean your head on his shoulder, questioning everything that brought you to this point.
#yandere tokyo revengers#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere#yandere headcanons#tokyo revengers#tokyo rev x reader#tokyo rev headcanons#tokyo rev smut#tokyo rev x you#sano mikey manjiro#sano manjiro x reader#manjiro x you#kazutora hanemiya#kazutora x you#kazutora x reader#sanzu haruchiyo#sanzu x you#sanzu x reader#ran haitani#ran x reader#ran x you#rin haitani#rin x reader#rin x you#cheating au#headcanon#toxic love#toxic relationship
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‘cause i’m that bitch.
pairing: charles leclerc x fashionista!reader.
warnings: nothing! just reader being a bad bitch.
faceclaim: rihanna.
summary: charles keeps trying to tell everyone he’s in a relationship with you, the it girl of the fashion world. yet, no one believes him. he’s very keen on changing that.
— part two of my 500 followers celebration ♡ —
liked by vogue, zendaya and 3,822,728 others.
yourcompanyname: our boss y/n l/n at the cfda gala last night where she was awarded the fashion icon award. pictures of her arriving to, during and after the event.
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ynswife: ‘do my tits bother you? they're COVERED… in swarovski crystals girl!’
-> user1: oh she ate this look up so bad.
user7: i remember when she was still interning for vogue and now she’s one of the biggest makeup and clothing moguls in the world 🥺
-> yourcompanyname: thanks for being with us since the beginning!! check your dms for a surprise! 🙈
user5: that’s my favourite fashion designer!
user6: did y’all see the post-award interview? she was giggling saying she was going to celebrate with someone after getting the award…. i wonder who it was.
-> user9: probably just her best friend. they’re really close and she helps her get ready for events like this.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
PARTIAL TRANSCRIPT.
— phone conversation between CHARLES LECLERC and Y/N L/N.
CHARLES LECLERC: they don’t believe it! they don’t believe i’m dating you!
Y/N L/N: they’re probably joking babe-
LECLERC: they called me a french twink! i’m not even french!
L/N: i know babe.
LECLERC: we need to ramp it up. can i wear one of your designs? maybe they’ll understand when i’m dressed in your fashion.
L/N: i have the perfect outfits for you. i’ll send them tomorrow!
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
liked by yourusername, landonorris and 1,383,937 others.
gqmens: charles leclerc is our new cover boy, dressed in yourcompanyname’s menswear from head to toe.
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landonorris: can you get me some clothes 😩
-> user6: BUY EM 🤨
user2: idc if he’s a stalker, he’s sooooo fine i’m sorry.
-> dumbass1: he can stalk me deadass. go all joe goldberg on me 😍😩
user89: he’s really trying to make us believe that he’s dating her…. we’re not that gullible dumbass!
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
liked by yourcompanyname, vogue and 1,728,727 others.
y/nsfanpage: last night y/n was seen at the movie premiere of ‘material girl’, the second film that she’s produced under her production company!
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user3: queen!! don’t know what looks better, her or the movie!
user8: some vroom vroom guy is saying he’s dating her….
-> user9: imagine 😭
user7: he’s even buying clothes to pretend he’s sponsored by her that’s crazy 😭😭😭😭
-> user5: she needs a restraining order i’m so serious.
user6: she looks so good!! 😍
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
PARTIAL TRANSCRIPT
— phone conversation between CHARLES LECLERC and Y/N L/N.
LECLERC: we need to pull out the big guns.
L/N: if you’re sure…
LECLERC: i just want people to understand and believe i’m dating you. i don’t want people to believe i’m a weird stalker.
L/N: oh babe, i’m so sorry. you know what? i’ll take the day off tomorrow, we can go out and spend all day doing what you’d like to do.
LECLERC: all i want to do is be with you.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
liked by ynswifey, charlieeupdates and 2,628,982 others.
ham1ltonshaderoom: after initial disbelief from the internet, business mogul and it girl y/n l/n has been spotted cosying up with formula one driver charles leclerc in an art gallery in paris. how are we feeling about this new couple ham1ltons?
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user7: HE STOLE MY WIFE!!!!!! BOOOO
user6: i apologise mr leclerc i was unfamiliar with your game.
-> user7: don’t ever doubt the game of a peculiar white dude.
user78: she looks so good even blurry.
user67: that outfit is crazy he looks like a mime.
-> user23: he’s never beating the french allegations.
user12: first pic is actually so cute!!
user34: i still think it’s photoshopped.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
taglist: @lemon-lav @firelily-mimi @formulaal @sya-skies @namgification @raevyng @ajvaix @demvnsriot @blupblupfish @ravisinghs-wife @f1kenzzz @d3kstar @wildflowermarns @ironmaiden1313 @evie-119 @decafmickey @nichmeddar @casperlikej @cuteskz @charlesleclercsonlywife @booksandflowrs @mxdi0 @alexmarie29 @iloveyou3000morgan @fate-posts @luckyladycreator2 @23victoria (don’t see yourself or wanna be removed? send an ask!)
— don’t wanna miss an update? join my taglist!
#jayde’s works ☆#ham1lton 500 ☾#formula one x reader#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 smau#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#f1 texts#f1 fanfic#formula one imagine#formula one x black reader#charles leclerc texts#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x y/n#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x black!reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x black reader
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Look at this photograph
(joel miller x f!reader)
The half sequel (Chapter 1.5) to Never made it as a wise man
WC: 3.5k | Part 1 | Other fics | Rating: 18+
Summary: you open Joel’s dick pic and (after examination) decide to give him a call
Note: it’s me ya boi (gn), back with more divorceddadrockdilf!joel bc you guys get me. i know y’all want them to fuck, and I want them to fuck too. unfortunately, this flowed through me first, and I am merely a vessel for the spirit of buttrock joel.
so, until they get their freak nasty on, please enjoy this as a chapter 1.5, with gratuitous dick pic art critique and crankin’ it over the phone <3 don’t worry, he’s still a lil pathetic. mistakes and bad jokes are all on me.
Tags: au no outbreak modern joel, divorced dad rock dilf joel x f!reader, picks up right where ch.1 ended, dick pic descriptions, alternating pov, dirty talk, phone sex, masturbation, it’s all just phone sex, but edge yourself through it with fond memories of ch. 1, still crackish, but i am still dead serious about it being hot so idc
inspo playlist i found on spotify: Divorced Dad Rock: BANGERZ
thanks: to @hellishjoel for hosting the #hotdilfsummerchallenge and to everyone who enjoyed part 1
@gothcsz i promise fuckboy!joel is cookin, he’s just in the crockpot rn. he’s gotta tenderize like a white lady’s pinterest recipe for pulled pork.
* i tried to tag everyone who wanted more, but if you don’t wanna be here i’ll remove it <3 or if i missed you and you want to be tagged next time pls let me know
“Oh, Jesus Christ,” you blurt out after opening the message from Joel. The vulgar dick pic sends a prickly worm of arousal slithering down your spine.
Without thinking, you tilt the phone down toward your chest, and your eyes shoot up like you’ve got to make sure nobody saw your naughty message. Warmth blooms on your cheeks as the flash of embarrassment starts to dissolve. You don’t need to hide.
You’re in your bed, in your apartment, wearing Joel’s grubby Creed t-shirt. The one that smells like Degree Sport and a Jiffy Lube break room. You're free to look at all the dick pics your heart desires. And that’s what you’re going to do.
The wiggle of bashful energy turns into a squirm as you shift your hips, seeking a comfy position in bed. The t-shirt bunches up under your back and you wonder if the unique Joel scent of it will linger on your pillow beneath your shoulders. You knew pilfering the shirt on the way out the door was a good move, and now you get to enjoy your trophy. It makes it feel like the broad-as-a-barn-door DILF himself was still close enough to touch you.
It gives you another bright shudder when you think about the noises he made when he came in your hand earlier. The disappointed grunts of “fuck, wait” and how he tried to choke down the throaty groan that came from deep in his chest. Fuck. The perverted gremlins that have a permanent residence in your mind have been roused by the digital dick, and now they chitter and squawk at you. More! More! More!
You reopen the message, and seeing it gives you another rush. You save the picture to your phone storage. For your personal collection. Mine now, big boy. Your chin starts to dip towards your chest. It’s like you’re giving your phone the Kubrick stare with the ghost of a smirk. You’re free to take your time with this one. And you can be as much of a creep as you want. That makes you sigh softly and sink deeper against your pillows.
Before this afternoon, it was titillating when Joel would pop up in your mind's eye with his slutty slo-mo scenes. The one where he was bent over your car's engine like Megan Fox in that Transformers movie. Or, that damn happy trail tease with the t-shirt-sweat-rag move. You had just enough imagery to let your dirty thoughts take the wheel.
And, god, you had a good production team in your mind for projects starring Joel. Adding this will give the team a whole lot more to work with. You can hear them crashing around your conscious like the Animaniacs on the Warner Brothers lot. Horny chaos goblin mode activated.
Now that you have time to study the image, from the luxury of your microfiber sheets and lamplit bedroom, you let it get pervy. It’s your first real, lingering look–earlier today, you were so busy trying to rile him up in his jeans that you didn’t even pull it out.
It had somehow been even more delicious that way. Having him all needy and unable to stop himself from making a mess in your hand. And not just the noises, but the erratic thrusts into your tight fist? The heat of his pulsing length as he forgot himself? Yeah, you’re gonna remember that one.
But now? Now you need the visual. If the devil is in the details, you have a new neighbor with horns and a tail.
You zoom in on everything. Holding your phone closer to your face than necessary, like how do we enhance this bitch?
And holy shit.
Drool pools in your mouth and between your legs. You have the knee-jerk reaction to lick your phone.
You can hear Joel’s voice from earlier today. All husky and grumbly, arguing that you really were a slut for him, like, “You are, aren’t you, though? You came all this way in this excuse for a shirt just to see me?” He might be touch-starved enough to cream his jeans, but you just know he’s got a nasty mouth in bed, and you’ve got to find out firsthand. Soon. There’s no reason not to, right?
You pause when a flicker of reasoning tickles the back of your neck.
You’re back to looking in your review mirror in Joel’s driveway. The last-ditch attempt at checking your ego before you marched to his front door like a Halloween hoe bag version of Betty Crocker.
You had told yourself you weren’t trying to fuck your (almost) friend’s (sort of) dad. Told yourself there was nothing to pursue, and even if there was, you wouldn’t bite.
You like Ellie. She’s been (mostly) welcoming to you. You told yourself not to fuck anything up with the only person that’s got a single one of your jokes at your new job.
You were just bringing some food as a friendly gesture. The fresh visuals to add to your spank bank reel were supposed to be a harmless bonus. Okay, maybe it was a stretch to say you had rolled up to Joel’s driveway with pure intentions.
And it was an even bigger stretch–when he added that third finger while he finger fucked you on the kitchen counter—wait, no. It was an even bigger stretch when you had told yourself you probably weren’t his type anyway.
Like, that guy? With the fridge full of Coors Banquet? With those ugly Oakley sunglasses that you know are featured in his only picture on social media that isn’t a car or truck? The guy with all the words to Buckcherry’s “Crazy Bitch” and Puddle of Mudd’s “She Hates Me” memorized?
Nah, deep down, you knew. You knew there was no way that middle-aged bachelor would turn down any action. But you hadn’t planned on actually making a move, especially not a handjob in the middle of the kitchen.
That’s on Joel for leaving the door open while trying to rub one out to some bimbo on Brazzers. And for barking at you in that sexy, angry voice. And for teasing you with the bulge in his oil-stained jeans. What were you supposed to do?
Something must be really rotting in the logic department of your brain.
Hey! The gremlin voice in your head is still shouting at you. Hey!! Why are we not tasting that dick yet?!! You’re back from your daydream and the excuses you crafted for your behavior, back to laying in your bed with Joel’s dick pic emitting a bright glow in your hand.
You still do want to lick the screen.
Fortunately for your immune system, you control your tongue. The critical part of you expels a sigh when you zoom out and take in the picture.
It’s undoubtedly a nice cock, but the image as a whole? Yikes.
Why do men have to be so fucking thick? And blunt? Wait, now you’re just describing the slightly blurry boner lighting up your face. Thick as in dense. How can men be so dense?
No imagination or creativity. No patience.
You shake your head slightly, scoffing. No wonder you caught him hunched over his cracked phone screen. It was probably the first video loaded on the only site he had saved.
No sweet, sweet, buildup, setting the mood, or getting cozy. Just whippin’ it out midday or snapping a photo in some ratty sweats.
Like you’ve never been that touch-starved or down bad?
You ignore that voice to continue your art critique.
The photo you sent is… sexy.
Sultry. A flirty tease. It says, “Look who has your shirt? Am I wearing it in bed? Do you think I'm wearing anything else?”
It’s all implied in the look in your eye and the picture's composition. The tease of the soft curves on the underside of your breasts, asking if he remembers what they felt like. Your hand bunching up the shirt, asking if he remembers the slide of that fist around his cock. If he remembers those fingers, the ones you sucked his sticky spend off of.
Such delicately crafted imagery. Personalized erotic fine art.
But men are so crude about it. He sees your tasteful, sexy pic, and immediately, the best his caveman brain can come up with is: send her ur dick! STAT!! Hard cock! Now!!
And, of course, he did. Taken in the dark with the flash on, making ominous shadows in the background. His old charcoal gray sweats are pulled down just enough to expose everything he’s offering.
The color is slightly blown out from the flash, and it’s a touch blurry where his phone didn’t autofocus quickly enough. His hand looks like it’s straight up, just choking the base of his cock. It’s jarring.
But that’s really the “man” of it all, right? Nothing subtle or demure about a rock-hard erection jutting towards you, reaching like it could get to you on its own if it just could get a little bit harder. No, there’s nothing coy about the raw thoughts of a man with no blood left in his brain who’s just aching to get inside you, either.
And fuck if that doesn’t start to override your critical analysis.
The glare from the flash reflects in the beads of precome rolling down his rosy tip. Mouth wateringly delicious. Your blood rushes to your pussy, filling your tender sex with heat and a deep, needy itch. It makes you dopey and silly. Not cock drunk, but like, dick pic buzzed.
You know it felt sizeable in your hand earlier, but you aren’t an expert at estimating size from a through-the-pants handjob. You try to recreate your own grip around nothing to estimate the size.
You giggle to yourself when you realize you're just a woman in her bed staring at her hand, jerking an invisible cock. The horny goblins aren’t amused, though. They’re sick of the daydreaming and distractions. They’re picking fights with the rest of your mind. Throwing rocks and sticks, shrieking and hissing.
The part of your brain that was griping about how men used to write love letters and respect the art of romance is getting quieter and further from your faculty for caring. You can hear its muffled shouts, and you assure that voice that you won’t give it all up this easily. Then, you completely tune it out.
The last brain cell with a complaint has you rolling your eyes. You have to be ovulating or something because it’s wholly debased the way this guy is doing it for you.
He’s just shameless with it.
You sent him tasteful underboob, and he gives you jumpscare dick-in-the-dark! How is this supposed to escalate? He gave it all up immediately! You send another picture, and he sends you his money shot? What’s he gonna do to give you more? Send you an asshole shot? That one makes you snort. You bet he would do it, too, if you asked.
Oh, that gives you a better idea. He’s not getting another picture from you at all. You tap on his name and tap the call icon. Of course, this horny motherfucker answers immediately. You aren’t sure it even rang before you’re connected to his porny bedroom voice.
“What are you wearing, dollface?”
“I already showed you. Call me dollface again, and I’m hanging up.”
You can hear his breathing like he’s got the mic on his phone in his mouth. That would typically drive you fucking nuts, but right now, you wanna hear his heavy breath against your ear and feel it hot against your skin.
“All right,” he speaks slowly, distracted. You know why. “You wanna be my slut, instead?”
Fuck. That has you throbbing between your legs, but he doesn’t get to know that yet.
“I already told you,” you keep your voice low and soft, “you don’t get to call me a slut for you, not with your behavior.” You strain, trying to hear any other noises, but his mic is probably clogged with dust from his shop or lint from the pocket of his sweats. You can just hear his fucking breathing.
“What behavior, baby?” he rasps.
“You always jump straight to sending a picture of your cock?”
You hear the soft snort through the phone. Followed by a deeper, throatier noise. A noise that makes you go cross-eyed and has you running a hand down to your naked lower half to tease yourself.
“You always steal a man’s clothes after you come on his fingers?”
You don’t really care what he asked. His voice makes your tongue go numb. Your mind goes blank. You start slowly, coating your own fingers in your slick arousal and drawing circles with a light touch.
You hum a noncommittal response into the phone.
“You look good in my shirt, baby, fuck,” he trails off breathlessly. The idea of you in his clothes gets him too close.
You don’t answer, and he’s too far gone to wait and tease.
He’s been wound up since you took off this afternoon, and it doesn’t feel like a coincidence that you sent him that pic when he had just gotten into bed.
It had taken ages to get his brother out of the shop this afternoon, and then Joel completely fucked up when he mentioned you and the lasagna. He had to begrudgingly host Tommy for dinner when he couldn’t come up with a better excuse than saying, “I’m gonna need you to fuck off so I can deal with the aching balls I’ve got from your surprise visit scaring away the woman I had my fingers knuckle deep inside.”
But when he was finally alone, it was like fate; your text came through right after he flopped onto his bed. His semi-stiff cock had sprung to full mast at the sight of you. The shirt he knew he didn’t fuckin’ lose, your soft curves, and the expression on your face. Like a vixen. Your PG-13 tease would do more for him than any X-rated video.
Knowing you were thinking about him and that you wanted him to know? That had him throbbing. He already knew from the desire in your eyes earlier today that you wanted more.
He could swear his fingers still hold the lingering flavor of your wet cunt. The visceral memory of you has him on edge. When he wraps his hand around the base of his cock, he has to pause, holding firmly in place. His body screams and aches for release, but he’s determined to keep it in check. He doesn’t want to blow his load until he gets a response from you.
He fights his urges, trying not to fuck his own fist in a frantic race to come.
But, fuck, it’s difficult when he can imagine the sounds you’d make as you sank onto his cock for the first time. The face you’d make. Your tight, wet walls hugging him just right. Like, he’s where he’s meant to be.
And the way you would look, bouncing on top of him. Your tits, your blissed-out face, the way your soft lips would part when you called out his name and cried for more.
Those lips.
The way he’d love to see them swollen and slobbering around the base of his cock. Fuck. His hips buck reflexively, and he hisses out a breath through his clenched teeth. When his phone lights up with your name, he answers before it can make a sound. You’re so bold. He likes that. It plasters a saucy grin on his face.
And now, with your breathy voice crackling through his janky phone speaker, he’s not gonna last long. You've got him losing his composure for the second time in one day. His whole body is rigid. His toes flex and snap unconsciously, and his jaw tenses. He hears your soft moan, and his thoughts are overflowing. He has no filter left.
“Yeah, baby? You moaning for me?” His hips punch up into his fist, and he gives in, allowing himself firm, severe strokes. “You’ve got me so hard. You moaning for my cock?”
You are so not gonna answer that one. If the next words out his mouth are, “Yeah, you like that?” you’re gonna block him for that. But it is undeniably hot to hear him already so worked up. You just know he’s gonna be coming all over himself again for you, and that really does make you moan just for him.
Your noises earn you another growly groan from Joel that you’d kill to hear again. The more uninhibited his noises are, the louder you get in response.
“You using your fingers, or you have a toy?” his question is punctuated with a grunt.
“Mm, just fingers,” you purr, finally granting him an actual response as you roll your hips. Having Joel on the line gives you a heady sense of satisfaction. Wondering what’s going to come out of his filthy mouth next gives you a shiver of anticipation.
“I know that sweet pussy is just achin’ to be filled again.” Correct.
“Yes.”
“S’right, baby, I know.”
Joel whimpering on the phone for you is absolutely going to get you off. Your hips chase your own fingers. You switch your phone audio to speakerphone and drop it on your pillow so you can use both hands. Pinching at your own nipples as if it were Joel’s big hand under your smuggled shirt.
“Tell me,” he pants, “who do you need to fill it for you?”
“You, Joel.”
“Fuck,” he chokes out, “you wanna ride this cock, huh baby?”
“Mhmm.” Bingo. Right again. You wish you could feel the pressure of him inside of you, massaging and soothing away the agony. The weight of his body atop of yours, so solid and secure. You can just about feel the pressure of his pelvis grinding into you. The friction from the coarse curls at the base of his cock getting you closer and closer.
“Know you’d do so good,” he cuts himself off with a low noise, “so damn sexy.”
“What else would you do with me?” You wanna hear it. For your own fantasy and to know what he’s into.
“I’d have you taking me down your throat til you’re crying on it for me, fuck,” a primal noise erupts from him.
Face fucking. Of course. You can’t deny that when he says it, your body responds instantaneously. Your pussy floods eagerly at the idea, and your cheeks burn hot from the visual he gives you. You swallow down your moans, and you can imagine the weight of him on your tongue and the strain of trying to swallow around his cock.
“You wanna come down my throat?” As if that isn’t a fucking siren song that would make him steer a fleet of ships into a cliff? Your salacious words are too much.
“Shit. Yeah, baby, wanna watch you swallow for me.” You let all your moans and gasps flow freely for him to hear. “I’m so fuckin’ close,” he can’t stop the words from spilling out his mouth, “let me hear it, baby,” he can’t stop his pending bliss either. “Please, baby, I can’t, oh f-fuck,” he cuts himself off with another primitive grunt, and that’s precisely what your cavewoman cunt wanted to hear.
“Yes! Yes! Yes!” The horny goblins chant out loud this time. You can envision sweaty, pleading Joel lurching toward a reckless, full-body climax.
You’re far from grace when the crude sounds he lets out turn you into an uncivilized beast. You hear him gasping, growling, and whining for you. It plunges you into a staggering orgasm. Rolling waves of ecstasy leave you panting and sweating.
You lie in bed, chest rising and falling beneath the Creed logo. You’re left stunned at the intensity. A dreamy smile spreads across your face, and warm contentment, like honey, pours slowly over your muscles. Relaxing you as your tension softens and you turn to pick your phone back up.
Why was it so wholly consuming just to listen to him? Imagining the mess he made again,
because of you.
Maybe you’re just made for each other.
You and Joel.
Oh, god. You should start listening to Alanis Morissette and Evanescence and trade your car for a 1990s-era Toyota 4runner and a pack of Marlboro Smooths. Really lean into matching his freak and the divorced alt-rock vibes.
You laugh softly into your phone before a deep sigh possesses you, and you nearly fall asleep. You stretch and smile, letting your heavy eyelids rest.
He’s muttering something at you, catching his breath from the stress of being that fucking horned up for you all evening. And the overexertion of lasting long enough to hear your sweet cries of release.
“You’re unreal,” his smoky voice rings with awe. “Got me shooting loads like a fucking teenager.”
You snort at the juxtaposition of his tender voice and crude comment before ending the call with a whispered, “Goodnight.”
It shouldn’t make you smile.
But he’s somehow such an enticing disaster. A cliche lonely bachelor, a cocksure idiot who knows he’s got a big dick and a generous guy who was willing to fix a stranger's car.
You shouldn’t be trying to justify it, but you know he had you figured out earlier.
You may be sated tonight, but you won’t be able to rest.
Not until you get your hands on that DILF – or rather, your pussy on that dick.
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Hi,
Ok so this is inspired by all the drama and gossip I’ve seen on Instagram recently.
Can you write something with Lando and Y/N where Lando has made it clear from the very start that he likes Y/N and wants to date her? Y/N likes him back but is hesitant to start a relationship because of his many female friends, the fact that he and his family still follow his ex-girlfriend on social media, and because he still wears the bracelet his ex-girlfriend gave him. And y/n isn’t comfortable nor is she the type of person who would date guys with so many girls around him. She doesn’t want to explicitly tell Lando her reasons (because she doesn’t want to tell him what to do and not to do) so she always gives subtle hints when he asks why she doesn’t want to date him. Lando never picks up on these hints until someone close to him points it out, and he finally realizes what Y/N has been trying to tell him. And from here you can continue however you want
anon the way this is sooo real. also the drama? idc about it but i absolutely love drama in any way so!
tw: fem!reader, swears, idk lmk if you want me to add anything.
w/c: 1.9k
ever since you had first met lando he had made it very clear that he wanted a relationship with you and that he really did like you. the boy was all over you. he was constantly offering you take you out on dates when he was in the same place as you. he always wanted to be around you, giving you a call to come over and sit in his flat with him while he deep cleaned his kitchen. lando even told all of his friends about how much he liked you. oscar was sick fed up of hearing how pretty he thought your eyes were and max had told him that if he did not shut up about how infectious your laugh was he was going to leave him to sort out the details for the quadrant video for himself.
so it was safe to say that you had no reason to doubt that lando like you. you liked him too. you did not show it in the same ways as him though, you just being a tad more on the shyer side. your mind should have been convinced that lando only had eyes for you but it felt like you were adding two and two together to get five. his actions just did not make sense to your insecure mind.
the first 'red flag' you had stumbled across- well you did not even stumble across it. your friend did. and had told you it was one hundred percent a red flag and how were you to know any different? you were not experienced in this kind of thing, due to your shyness.
you had both been out for lunch and some shopping when you had just been chatting about lando and how things were going. she had asked why you guys had not done much more than two or three basic dates and you had responded that you were a little nervous to progress with him. she had questioned this and at that point you were not totally sure why you were feeling like that which had made you feel more guilty at the time. you had told her about one little thing that was niggling at the back of your brain since you had discovered it. all of lando's loved ones still followed his ex girlfriend on basically all socials and even liked her pictures regularly, this included lando. although lando had not liked a picture since they had been dating he still followed her.
"you are having a laugh?" she gasped at your words. the way she seemed shocked had made you a little nervous. were you wrong to be worried about it? were you not worried enough about it? it was moments like these that you thought you were not cut out for romantic relationships, it was much too hard these days. you wished for simpler times when if you liked someone you just told them and then you were dating.
"is that bad?" you had asked her, worriedly.
"i mean, it's kinda a red flag. why would he want to follow her? unless he was still close with her. he must be if his family still follow her. she must've been one of those girlfriends that the whole family falls in love with too." your friend explains as thoughts. you had thought that her explanation would have made you feel better but just like that you felt your mind shift into almost sure to doubt.
you knew your friend kind of had a point with what she had said but the rational part of you, deep deep down, was telling you that all of this was just causing unnecessary doubt to grow in your mind. it reminded of you of how lando acts towards you and it settled your mind for a minute or so before you fell down the hole again. you had always believed actions spoke louder than words but what actions spoke louder in this case?
from then you had fallen down a horrible spiral of pulling apart almost everything lando did. your mind always going back to that conversation in a cafe and reminding you of what your friend told you.
lando had invited you out as he had missed you a lot and of course you had said yes because as much as you were stressing yourself out about all of this, you did like him. you were just wary, that was all. it was not your scene at all, this house party. you did not know anyone there except lando and max. max was there alone as his girlfriend was not able to make it. you three sat with each other all night and max had gotten a front row seat into seeing exactly how lando was acting around you and vice versa.
all throughout the night, girls that lando was apparently 'friends' with had come up to him and blatantly flirted with him, right in front of your face, everyone here knew that he had brought you here with him as his date. so it confused you to no end how lando just sat back and let these girls flirt with him. it was literally textbook, basic flirting. finger twirling a piece of hair around as she giggled at something he said. even though it was not really that funny. and you just had to sit back and watch because what else were you supposed to do? you did not want to tell him how to live his life. if he wanted to be 'friends' with these girls then who were you to tell him he could not be? you guys were not even dating, for gods sake! even if you were you were definitely not one of those girls who told their boyfriends that they cannot even talk to another girl, never mind be friends with one.
once the fourth girl of the hour had left you all alone lando turns to you again.
"you're a wanted man tonight." you tell him, your voice tight as you tried not to be jealous. you felt stupid being jealous, was there anything to even be jealous over? lando laughs at your words and does not seem to notice your tone or even the expression clear as day on your face. you were too busy talking to lando to notice that max had notice everything you had tried to hide.
"guess i am." is all he says. it stuns you that that was all he said to you but you do not cause any drama about it. well you do not mean to. it just comes out, really. you just have to hope that he does not take it to heart.
"it's a lot of girls." it comes out like a half laugh half scoff. max thinks lando is incredibly dumb for not even noticing the reassurance you were clearly seeking right now. he set himself a metal note to slap him on the back of the head once they were alone.
lando barely even registers the words you say as he changes the subject and that is it forgotten about. you know it was not on purpose. he did not mean to just change the subject there and then when you had brought that up but it kind of did make sense and in your mind it went down as another red flag. it sat right next to the one your friend had pointed out a few weeks earlier.
you had left a little earlier than you had originally intended and as you were waving goodbye to both boys from inside the taxi, lando had ever so kindly booked and payed for you, you see max's hand come to slap the back of his friend's head. it made you laugh but you did not think too much about it. neither did lando apparently as he just hits max back ten times harder as he heads back inside.
the third and final 'red flag' came from when you were stalking instagram. you knew yourself you should not have been scrolling through the f1 gossip pages but you got curious about that curly-haired boy that took up your mind constantly. you do not have to scroll very far to get to something that upsets you. a picture of lando with a fan and a second one zoomed in on his arm, showcasing a lovely bracelet that you had seen lando wear many times. the caption? 'lando is still wearing the bracelet his ex got him!'.
you felt dumb again. you did not have to ask anyone if that was a 'red flag', you already knew. the next time you met up with lando after you had seen the instagram post you immediately noticed the piece of jewellery and it was so fucking hard to take your eyes off of it from then. somehow max had ended up on this outing too and just like always, he noticed your eyes glued to his arm. it did not take him long to put the pieces together. he knew there and then that he had to sit down and have a chat with him. as soon as he possibly could.
max had left to pop into a different shop as you and lando had waited outside together.
"so, can i ask why exactly you don't wanna date me?" lando asks bluntly, like he had been sitting on the question for a while.
you flush. "we've been on dates." you tell him, like he was not there and did not already know that.
"i know. but i get the feeling you don't wanna go further with me. it's alright if you don't but i'd like to know why?" lando asks, you can see the traces of hurt in his eyes as the mere thought of you not wanting him the same way he wanted you.
"no, i do. well i don't but i do. i like you, really like you. but i'm scared to go further with you."
lando looks at you confused, as if it was baffling to him to be scared to jump head first into something, especially when he keeps making you doubt if you were seriously even an option in his mind sometimes.
"why are you scared?" lando presses further but before you can respond max comes out with a bag in hand and asks if you can all stop for some food. the moment is gone and you are not too sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing.
after the outing was finished and max and lando were hanging out at lando's max finally decides to have the conversation with his friend. hoping that he will knock some sense into his seemingly senseless mate. lando beats him to it though.
"today while we were out, i asked her why she doesn't why doesn't wanna be with me and she said she was scared? she didn't get to tell me why." lando admits, his worry evident to his friend. max huffs at his friends obliviousness.
"she's scared because you're going around wearing shit your ex got you! doesn't help that your surrounded by girls flirting with you and you don't even shoot them down. and not getting any hints she drops? dude you're more stupid than i thought."
lando's brows rise as he lets max's words set in. he is completely shocked. he had not thought about any of this or about how it would effect you. he suddenly felt a rush of guilt wash through him. he needed to see you right now.
lando basically runs to you, leaves max at his flat and rushes over to yours. he needs to apologise as soon as he can. he needed you to know that you seriously are the one he wants the most.
#lando norris x you#lando norris fluff#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando x reader#lando norris oneshot#ln4 x y/n#ln4 one shot#ln4 x reader#ln4#ln4 fluff#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#f1 imagine#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#lcriedlastnight#lcriedlastnightrequests
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wintersera sent me
but thigh riding w aeri!?
(92’fjfk;&2’
see i said it in vc as a joke but you ACTUALLY CAME HERE??? hello anon and thank you @wintersera! i will take care of your anon :]
NOW,,, let’s talk essentials. THIGH RIDING WITH AERI?? oh i have many thoughts about this you see!! the second picture HER THIGHS NEED TO BE RIDED(??) ON IDC IDC
MONSTROUS THIGHS I FEAR!!
see, i imagine her being that one really chill and unfiltered girl friend that you can just tell anythinggkenfj naturally, being as close as you two are, you two have conversations about basically anything, sex isn’t an exception! the next time you discuss kinks and whatnot, you’re telling her about how much you want to ride on thighs at least once in your life and she’s just staring at you, knowingly and is like “right.. right.”
now the thing is you’d bring it up so MUCH that at the 10th time she just interrupts you mid sentence and is all like “girl if you want to ride thighs this bad, just ride mine...” and at first you take it as a joke and laugh it off… that’s until you see her looking at you with a smug expression.
oh her ass wasn’t joking at all dawg—
and oh boy does she know that you like the idea, not like you blushing and hiding your face at the mere thought of you riding her thighs could go unnoticed, anyway. “cmonn, it’ll be funnn.” she tried persuading you, telling you how she was already wearing shorts etc. you quickly wave your hand around in response, saying that it would be crazy since you two are friends blah blah you know it goes. the worst part? you’re genuinely considering it on second thought?? it’s actually so bad for you rn YOU NEED TO LOCK IN! you don’t want to though, obviously. i mean cmon riding aeri’s thighs? girl yes AS CRAZY AS IT IS TO RIDE YOUR FRIEND’S THIGH OUT OF NOWHERE— GIRL YES
after lots, lots of convincing, sure enough, you caved in, both in her desires and your own.
the actual thigh riding? crazy. CRAZY I TELL YOU! you personally think it’s embarrassing that you’re already dripping and leaving a small puddle of your slick on her soft thigh,,, she thinks it’s cute though, she even teases you about it ahehehehhfjdn
would i be insane in thinking that she’d talk you through it?? like WALK WITH ME her hands are on your hips and she’s gently pushing you back and forth on her thigh, helping you find the rhythm of your grinding… interlocking her eyes with yours and watching how your breaths become heavy pants, maybe even slight whimpers:(((
she’ll whisper you things like “does it feel good, y/n?” just so she can watch you whine and nod in a keen manner in responsefksmcjd she surprisingly loves seeing you lose control on her :(( STRADDLING HER LAP IS TURNING HER ON MUCH MORE THAN SHE THOUGHT IT WOULD! plus you sounded and looked too good, gasping and moaning all up in her ear once you were close to climax, hence why…
she’d look at your lips and kiss you when you end up cumming on her because fuck everyone i don’t make the rules… and you wouldn’t even expect it either because uhm hello y’all are simply friends you didn’t know she got down like that! though you still kiss her back ofc,, her lips passionately dancing with yours whilst you’re getting yourself off on her OUH
thank you anon this was very liberating
#sug speaks#anon asks#anon#smut#kpop gg#female reader#aeri uchinaga#like YESSS#aeri uchinaga smut#aespa giselle smut#aespa giselle x reader#giselle aespa#giselle x female reader#giselle x fem reader#thigh riding my beloved
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❝ THE INTERNET WILL GO CRAZY ❞
MASTERLIST!
pairing . . . lando norris x reader, charles leclerc x ex!reader
◦∘。゚. request . . . “Could you write an imagine based on this video https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMM35uygV/ where reader was Lando new girlfriend (Charles's ex) and Alex was her bestfriend. Then reader was doing a live on Instagram and Alex appeared in the background and many fans made negative comments about her friendship and reader defended her.”
◦∘。゚. summary . . . the internet loves to make up narratives when there are none.
◦∘。゚. note . . . i changed the prompt a bit because i didn’t know how to write the live part, i hope that’s okay! no hate to the wags or drivers this is all fiction and not meant to represent any real life events 🫶 this isn’t my best work, but hopefully it’s still enjoyable!!!!
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yourusername barthelonaaa 🇪🇸❤️
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landonorris omggg i made it to the dumpppp
⤷ yourusername i put that picture for oscar?
⤷ landonorris have oscar invite you to the paddock then🙄
landofan1 favourite wag ever
landofan2 not lando not wearing shoes
ynfan1 mother and father fr
ynfan2 her glow up since being in mclaren >>>
⤷ landofan3 thank the lord charles fumbled 🙏
ynfan3 she doesn’t know it but she’s my best friend
ynfan4 nobody is giving wag royalty quite like her
user1 how did lando bag her
⤷ landofan4 she’s everything, he’s just a guy who drives in circles
alexandrasaintmleux updated their story!
user21 responded to your story!
user21 get a job!!!! stay away from her!!!!
ynfan21 responded to your story!
ynfan21 not y/n doing charity work
ynfan22 responded to your story!
ynfan22 you could learn how to be girl’s girl 😘
ynfan23 responded to your story!
ynfan23 WHAT IS THISSSSS
user22 responded to your story!
user22 y/n mogged you BAD
ynfan24 responded to your story!
ynfan24 hope you know us y/n stand do not like you
ynfan25 responded to your story!
ynfan25 hope charles was worth fucking over your bestie
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f1gossip Let the gossip begin! As we all know, Y/N L/N used to date Charles Leclerc and then broke up amicably in 2021. In 2023 she was spotted back in the paddock, hand-in-hand with Lando Norris. As for Charles Leclerc, he too, introduced his new girlfriend Alexandra Saint Mleux in 2023.
Now, what is the gossip you might ask? Well, Y/N and Alexandra used to be besties! The pair were very close, from comments in each others posts (even those with Charles in them, messy, we know) to various pictures of them hanging out.
The pair of friend stopped interacting with each other when Alexandra was first spotted in the 2023 Monaco Grand Prix. There had been rumours of the pair, but it wasn’t until there was actual confirmation that Y/N decided to go no-contact on social media (she never unfollowed her, though).
Shockingly, this past weekend they were spotted alongside other WAG’s hanging out! It even went as far as Alexandra uploading a story with her former best friend.
Do we think this is a new beginning of their friendship or is just attention-seeking, now that Alexandra has made her Instagram public? Let us know your thoughts below!
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ynfan32 how coincidental that alexandra opens her account and suddenly she’s friends again with y/n🙄
user31 it’s definitely suspicious timing! maybe they realised it’s better to friends or just missed eachother
⤷ ynfan33 idc how much you miss me i’m not being friend’s with you if you’re with my ex
landofan32 honestly i’m here for this drama, f1’s getting boring we need some action
user32 i think it’s a new beginning, friendships go through rough patches (especially with exes involved)
ynfan34 i’m honestly curious who reached out to who
⤷ ynfan35 probs alexandra, can’t imagine y/n calling her up
user33 good for them if it’s real! it’s really none of our business what they do 🤷♀️
ynfan36 there’s a lot we don’t know about, but still this is all so fishy
charlesfan31 neither of them deserve charles, that’s for sure
⤷ ynfan37 girl charles is also a homie hopper, he has his own red flags so stay out of this😭
yourusername updated their instagram story!
responses have been disabled!
#*ੈ✩༄ my works !#lando norris#lando norris x reader#ester exposito#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x you#lando norris fanfic#lando norris fic#lando norris fluff#lando norris social media au#lando norris smau#lando norris angst#charles leclerc fanfic#alexandra saint mleux#f1#formula 1#formula one#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 fanfic#f1 social media au#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 social media au
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i'm glad whenever i can share her laughter !!!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which they finally get their picture perfect ending that everyone was hoping for.
or
for when you have everything you ever wished for. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
social media au // charles leclerc x fem!reader
warnings - language
author's note - this series is now officially done!!!! im soooo happy about how this turned out and i hope u enjoyed it as much as i did <33 thank u sm for reading, i love you <33
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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yourusername julianne marie leclerc-y/l/n 🤍
tagged charles_leclerc
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username OMG SHE'S HEREEEE
username GOING CRAZY RN WDYM THE BABY IS HERE
username JULIANNE 😭 MARIE 😭 LECLERC-Y/L/N 😭
lewishamilton missing baby j ❤️
-> yourusername she misses her uncle lew and brother roscoe ❤️
username SO ADORABLE ARE U KIDDING ME
lilymhe i'm kidnapping her idc
-> alex_albon yes please i miss her already
-> yourusername no bc im pretty sure she loves u both more than her actual PARENTS
landonorris can i come over
-> yourusername u JUST left
-> landonorris CAN I COME OVER
-> yourusername ok
charles_leclerc mon ange 😘 ( my angel )
-> yourusername ❤️
charles_leclerc thank you for everything mon amour ( my love )
-> yourusername thank YOU for everything i love u sooooosososo bad
username i feel like such a proud parent it's INSANE
username IM CRYING OMG
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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charles_leclerc it should be noted that she asked for her "mamamamama" a few thousand times and now i'm taking her with me to where ever
tagged yourusername
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username MAMAMAMAMA PLEASE
username she's a mama's girl fr
username JULIE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
danielricciardo baby julie owns my heart
-> heidiberger_ mine too 🤍
-> charles_leclerc where was this heart owning when she was screaming her head off in the middle of the night and you both suddenly had a "fever"
-> username PLEASE HE PULLED OUT THE RECEIPTS
-> username he's really done with everyone
maxverstappen1 p wants to meet her best friend. again. please.
-> charles_leclerc can we exchange?
-> maxverstappen1 yes
-> kellypiquet no (you are more than welcome to leave baby j with us anytime ☺️)
-> yourusername no (I MISS P PLEASE COME OVER)
-> charles_leclerc ONE CHILD IS ENOUGH
-> maxverstappen1 exactly what he said
username i love watching charles realise that having a baby is SO much more than js buying cute clothes and playing with toys
-> yourusername i know he's so shocked
yourusername MY BABY 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️
-> charles_leclerc she's coming with me
yourusername bring her back asap i wanna hug her
-> charles_leclerc oh so suddenly i'm not enough?
yourusername u didn't hear this from me but she couldn't sleep without her red ferrari plushie last week when u were in maranello
-> charles_leclerc so now you're making me cry. great.
≡;- ꒰ °instagram stories ꒱
yourusername added to their instagram stories
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, pierregasly and 2,657,246 others
charles_leclerc i'm glad whenever i can share her laughter
tagged yourusername
15,172 comments
username WHY IS SHE GROWING UP SO FAST
username oh please no im not ready to see baby j grow up
leclerc_pascale bébé ❤️❤️❤️ ( baby )
-> charles_leclerc she misses her grand-mère❤️ ( grandmother )
carlossainz55 please stop blasting slipping through my fingers. it's 3am.
-> charles_leclerc she pulled herself up today YOU DON'T GET IT
-> username oh this man's gonna be in shambles when she starts walking
landonorris time needs to stay still, thank you.
-> charles_leclerc exactly 💯
yourusername babe she's literally 10 months old
-> charles_leclerc soon she'll be 10 years old and going to school and not wanting to hang out with me 🙁
yourusername STOP CRYING I CAN HEAR YOU FROM NEXT DOOR
-> charles_leclerc I'M NOT IT'S LANDO
-> landonorris I MISS BABY J
yourusername she misses her papa, come back
-> charles_leclerc yes ❤️❤️❤️ let me just console lando and we'll join you
username lando is so me
#f1 x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 imagines#social media au#fake instagram imagines#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x y/n#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc imagines#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc instagram au#charles leclerc#formula 1 x you#formula one x you#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula one imagine#formula one x y/n#f1 x you#f1 imagine
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ohhh i may have an idea for your polyamorous thing, what about the reader trying to soft launch her relationship with carlando but people keep thinking they’re just a group of very close friends or they think that she is only dating one of them and the other is just their friend so she gets tired of people not taking the hint and just ends up hard launching? maybe at a grand prix weekend?
captions ⋆ carlando smau
pairing: carlando x reader
summary: carlos, lando and you had been dating and soft launching each other for almost two years, and carlos just got bored of people thinking you're just friends.
warnings: some suggestive comments
a/n: not the biggest fan of lando EXCEPT when carlos is around so i loved doing this so much. also, it's my first smau, pls tell me what you guys think about it <3
masterlist | wattpad | letterboxd
yourusername just posted
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yourusername spent a few days watching this two drive in circles very fast (+ kiki)
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user1 NEW CARLANDO PHOTO JUST POSTED
user2 thank u y/n for feeding us with all this carlando content
landonorris dry ass caption
yourusername at least i post you you dumbass user1 never beating couple allegations user3 carlos must be so tired of third wheeling them
user4 THAT IS THE CUTEST DOG I'VE EVER SEEN
francisca.cgomes i'll never forgive you for naming your dog almost like me
yourusername it's my love language ok landonorris you could've named it lando or smth yourusername i'll change her name to nowins 💋 landonorris wait wat
carlossainz55 👑
landonorris ok i'll correct myself THIS is dry carlossainz55 you muppet yourusername at least he comments good things ?? user5 their friendship is top tier
lando.jpg just posted
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lando.jpg recents
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user1 here before y/n
user2 NOT LANDO SOFT LAUNCHING CARLOS
user3 i'm dying
user4 i don't wanna start something but that aren't lando's arms in the third picture
user5 it scares me that you can recognize lando's arms... user6 girl go touch some grass
yourusername and i'm the one getting called dry
landonorris i didn't want you to feel bad bout you're boring caption 💛
yourusername just posted
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yourusername you guys could've win at least
tagged carlossainz55, landonorris
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landonorris isn't a podium not enough for you?
yourusername no landonorris yeah idc what you think yourusername THEN WHY U ASK i'm changing to red bull they'll give me more emotional stability maxverstappen1 please stay there i don't want to have lando in the garage looking for you
user1 cute cute cute friendship
user2 call me crazy but...
user3 but WHAT GIRL? user2 lando soft launching carlos and posting the picture of y/n with another boy (definitely carlos), and them posting each other anytime they can user4 girl they're just friends user5 yeah they've been knowing each other for a long time, they're just very close
carlossainz55 our biggest supporter 💛💛
yourusername always 💛 user2 OUR biggest supporter? them using the same heart lando used in a previous post? user6 paranoid
carlossainz55 just posted
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carlossainz55 💛💛💛
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user1 WAIT OMFG
user2 CARLOS HARD LAUNCHING LANDO AND Y/N I TOLD U GUYS
user3 they're all dating?
user4 isn't that obvious
yourusername cute dog
carlossainz55 Hermosa we talked about calling Lando our dog landonorris she meant kiki you muppet yourusername no i actually meant you baby
user4 y/n won the game with this two
user5 now i know how true jealousy feels like
yourusername my pretty boyss 💛
carlossainz55 🥰🥰
landonorris dream rides 🤩
yourusername lan- carlossainz55 I'm going to ban Lando from this app user3 LANDO LMAOOOO
user6 CARLOS AND KIKI ARE THE CUTEST AHGDJKJHFSA
charlesleclerc so happy for you guys
user7 charles approves
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yourusername your dream girl's dream boys
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carlossainz55 First
landonorris he's so obsessed carlossainz55 Yeah
landonorris now THAT is a good caption
francisca.cgomes ok cutiess
danielricciardo Y/N blink twice if you need help
landonorris shut the fuck up she's totally fine with us yourusername save me pls
user2 does she even have a job?
landonorris serving cunt? carlossainz55 Being the most beautiful woman in the world? yourusername i'm a publicist but yeah mostly what they said user3 you're so iconic for this
#f1#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 fluff#noraverse 🫧#formula 1 one shot#f1 x oc#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 fic#f1 imagine#carlos sainz#lando norris#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz one shot#carlos sainz jr#carlos sainz imagine#smau#f1 smau#carlos sainz smau#carlos sainz x you#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#carlos sainz x y/n#ln4#ln4 x reader#ln4 imagine
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