#ice cream eating Scottish king

[brewed-pangolin]

Soap MacTavish.

Coming into the living room freshly showered, still glistening in nothing but those sexy grey sweatpants hanging so perfectly on his slutty waist.

Walking like a boss straight to the freezer to grab a carton of ice cream, muttering he got 'too hot n'th shower, need to cool off' while he shovels a spoonful into his mouth.

And you just sit on your couch. Dumbfounded.

Wondering how the fuck the majestic masterpiece that is John 'Soap' MacTavish somehow ended up in your life, half naked and eating ice cream straight from the carton in your kitchen like the Scottish king he knows he is.

[emblematicemblazer]

World building and theories of Engage

Dishes of Brodia

The dishes of Brodia come in these categories:

Celebratory dishes - Sour cream congee

Cheap recipes which can use leftovers or cheap ingredients - meat pie.

Preserving recipes - oatmeal

Exotic dishes - chicken tomato curry.

Crisp bread -  Crispbread can also be known as 'Glasgow morning rolls' or 'Scottish rolls'. They are very light and airy, and very, very crispy on the outside. Some people prefer almost black and in very odd differing shapes. The lifespan of these rolls is 24 hours so they must be eaten fresh. Some people eat them for breakfast while others make sandwiches with them. They are not the healthiest dining option but they are a well loved Scottish tradition. People make hot filled rolls with them which can include: square sausage, black pudding, bacon, potato scone or egg. Sometimes they are eaten with a very thick layer of butter. They can be made easily and cheaply which makes them perfect common folk food.

Sour cream congee - Congee is normally made with rice so I believe that this recipe is closer to rommegrot rather than congee. Rommegrot is a traditional Norwegian recipe meaning 'sour cream porridge '. Romme means 'sour cream' and grit means 'porridge'. It has a thick consistency and is often eaten with butter, cinnamon, sugar or cured meats. Traditionally it was eaten at celebrations including weddings and births, however it was not uncommon for peasant families to eat a plain version several days a week as a staple part of their diet. 

Crepe pancakes - The recipe is very similar to Scotch pancakes. In some parts of Scotland they are known as 'dropped scones'. They are different to French and English crepes because they are smaller, thicker and slightly risen. Traditionally they were eaten before lent to use up ingredients to avoid waste. The common folk would make them to use up ingredients before they spoil. 

Jam cake - This recipe seems to be based on Albert cake. This came has a short crust pastry base, jam and a light and fluffy sponge. It was a cake created in the Victorian era and made after Queen Victoria's husband, Prince Albert.

Tree cake - This recipe is for Sakotis ('Tree cake) which is a layered cake made on a spit. It is a celebration cake which takes a lot of time to make. It is often decorated with sugar iced flowers or chocolate. This is not an everyday cake in Brodia, unlike jam cake and crepe pancakes.

Fish Dango -  Dango is a species of fish but the recipe doesn't suggest that it is a recipe solely for this species. The recipe suggests this is battered fish, a popular dish and chip shop meal. You will find a fish and chip shop in every high street in the UK. The original recipe comes from Spanish and Portuguese Jews. In the 15th century Judaism was outlawed in Spain during the Spanish Inquisition. The Jews fled to Portugal. In 1496 King Manuel I mandated the expulsion or baptizing of Jews. The Jews fled to the UK where they introduced their version of fried fish. The Jews preferred their battered fish cold. It is a way to preserve fish.

Cheese wedge - This is just a big slice of cheese. Random cheese fact; the British are the most lactose persistent population in the world. Cheese was an important source of animal protein in the diet of mediaeval commoners, for people who could not afford meat, it was the only source. The byproduct of a cheese wedge could be used to make whey cheeses.

Oatmeal - This is a porridge recipe.  Oats have been grown in Scotland since late medieval times. There was no way to preserve oats, so they were turned into a paste and stored in a wooden drawer. The paste porridge would be eaten for a few days until it hardened, then it was eaten in thick slices.

Baked potato - Potatoes, also known as 'earth apples' changed from being an exotic ingredient only nobles sampled in the 16th century to a household staple in the 18th century. Generally it was recommended to serve them with butter or cream.  

Nut compote - Candied nuts could be an alternate name for this dish. Compote comes from the Latin  word 'compositus', meaning 'mixture'. In medieval medicine it was believed that sugar syrup balanced out the effects of humidity on the body. At a feast compote would be served at the beginning of the last course of a feast.

Traveler's egg - This is a recipe for Scotch egg. There is debate about the origins of the Scotch egg, Yorkshire and India are two of the potential origins. From the name 'Traveler's why's I gather the origin of choice is that it was created by luxury food sellers Fortnum & Mason in 1738 as a quick and convenient snack for city folk travelling to their country homes. 

Chicken tomato curry - This dish could be a reference to Chicken Tikka Masala. The origin of the dish is debated, but it is believed that spiced recipes were developed in both England and India thanks to the spice routes. In medieval times, spices helped make aging meat more palatable. In medieval Europe spices were considered an exotic ingredient purchased by the affluent, likewise in Brodia, spices would be a luxury traded commodity from Solm. 

.

 Haggis - Medieval manuscript calls it 'hagese'. When cattle drivers were taking their cattle to market, rations were made from any available ingredients and stored inside a sheep's stomach. When an animal was slaughtered, the nobleman would let the butcher keep the offal. I can imagine haggis being taken down mines when mining operations would take several days.

Crumble cake -This recipe can also be called 'crumb cake'. Fruit cakes were popular because they could be kept for many months. 

Marinated herring - Herring was a very important fish in Medieval Europe. Great Yarmouth, the port of Copenhagen and development of Amsterdam were founded due to herring fishing. The marinate would help but fermented and spoilt fish palatable. 

Meat pie - This recipe is a reference to 'Scotch pie'. In medieval times ours were known as 'pyes'. In royal courts they were used to entertain, an example of this can of merriment is live birds hidden in a crust that fly out when the pie is cut into. For the commoner, pies were a way of using and preserving meat and vegetables

[jo-the-bass-stealer]

tysm for the tag! loving the tunes on this reblog chain

salted caramel ice cream - metronomy (exquisite summer vibes right here)

lola - the kinks (ahhh the way me heart just melted when this came on i haven't heard it in a while)

c'est si bon - say she she (BANGERRR)

london calling - the clash (🕺)

lullaby - the cure (i had to skip this song once he started singing bc it's 2am and i really don't want the spider man sticking his tongue in my eyes :') )

love and hate in a different time - gabriels (this man descended from heaven just to sing istg)

i love you - fontaines d.c. (this song could step on me and i would thank it profusely)

it's sin that's got it's hold upon us - king creosote (my favourite scottish man. i will never forgive genius.com for how they BUTCHER HIS LYRICS THOUGH)

daydreaming - radiohead (this song is like eating 99% dark chocolate)

i saw her standing there - the beatles (🕺🕺🕺)

no pressure tags: @smufty @aeolianblues @jevilowo

thanks for the tag @glitchinginthegarden !!!

Rules: go to your ‘on repeat'/heavy rotation playlist on spotify/apple music, throw it on shuffle and share the first 10 songs you get

brother - murder by death

2. werewolf - fiona apple

3. would? - alice in chains

4. free - florence + the machine

5. not typing all that lmao

6. i dont care as long as you sing - beatsteaks

7. clown blood - los campesinos!

8. wer lacht jetzt - alligatoah

9. life itself - glass animals

10. dont preach to me - the skallywags

tagging: @seenonacid @pr1nce-elias @fehlerderkorrektur and @oneflydude <3

[artificialqueens]

You Light a Fire in My Heart (Rosénali) - Moonshot

A/N: I wasn’t expecting to write a follow-up to the first diner au this fast but I’ve genuinely fallen in love with the little au verse I’ve created. For context, this is set about a year after the events of ‘On The Ground’, and it spans across three months (March, April, and May). Flashbacks are in italics, and I hope you enjoy it x

Summary: The time(s) Rosé tried to be the best girlfriend to her Nali

Also on Ao3

-

If you had told Rosé a year ago that she would be dating one of the most amazing girls she’d ever met in her life, she would have believed you. Who wouldn’t want to date a fine bonnie lass like her?

What she wouldn’t have believed would have been that she was admittedly a tiny bit jealous of her girlfriend’s crush for a K-pop singer that shared her name.

Rosé was working on her laptop, busy mixing a track she had recorded with Jan and Lagoona when Denali had walked into the living room.

“OH MY GOD! I just finished watching Blackpink’s interview with James Corden and Rosé’s got the CUTEST accent! Her Aussie accent is so sexy too…” she remembered her girlfriend saying as she walked into her living room, her eyes glued to the phone in her hand.

“Hey!”, the pink-haired girl puffed out, “my Scottish accent is sexy too!”

Denali looked up, her left brow raised, “Says who?”, she asked teasingly.

“…My grandma”, Rosé replied unconvincingly, causing her girlfriend to laugh out loud.

“My Rosie is so cute when she’s jealous!”, she sing-sang, stamping a sloppy kiss on the older girl’s cheek.

“I’m not!”, she huffed as the black-haired girl sat next to her on the couch.

“You know she’s not my favorite in the group. Wanna know why?” Denali asked, draping her arms around Rosé’s neck.

“Why?”.

“Because you’ll always be my favorite Rosie”, she whispered in her girlfriend’s ear.

Rosé was sure her cheeks were matching colors with the shade of pink of her hair.

“Cheesy bitch”, she muttered as Denali hid her face in the crook of her neck.

“Yours truly”.

She remembered letting her girlfriend rest on her chest, the sweet strawberry scent of Denali’s shampoo filling her nose as she tried to focus on the track she was working on. 

However, another thought was buzzing in her head. 

The brunette’s birthday - the first one since they had started dating - was coming up soon and Rosé had absolutely no idea what to get her. 

Dedicating her a song, while definitely in her range, was too obvious of a gift. She really wanted to surprise her, to give her something she would remember for years to come.

With less than a month to the date, Rosé decided to go to the very familiar diner to pick up something quick to eat before going to grab the equipment she needed for her weekly set across the street. 

As she walked up to the register to pay up after having grabbed some pastries, she couldn’t help but notice the absence of a familiar face. She was sure Denali was set to be on shift at that hour.

Her attention was drawn back to the guy behind the counter.

“Hey, gorge! Looking for me?”, Mik asked as he took the pastry bag from the pink-haired girl.

Rosé rolled her eyes playfully, “Hey to you too, Mik,” she replied as she took out some cash, “Sorry to burst your bubble, short king, I was just wondering where my lovely girlfriend is”.

The shorter guy shrugged, “Your loss. I’m always open for a tall glamazon like you, gorge”, he winked before presenting her the receipt, “it will be 4,99$ for that, and also Nali was allowed to go home early by Miss Iman because she was trying to get tickets for some concert, I think?”

Rosé gave a little nod of acknowledgment and was handing over the cash when a voice caught her attention.

“Oh, no!”, both Mik and Rosé turned their head to another of the diner staff, Olivia, who was looking down at her phone pouting, “Nali just texted me saying that the Blackpink show in Chicago she wanted to go to sold out before she was able to get a standing ticket and the VIP ones are too expensive for her! Oh, poor baby Nali”.

“What other tour dates are they doing?” the singer asked, an idea forming in her head.

The other girl furrowed her brows, trying to remember, “Well, Nali wanted to go to the Chicago one with some of her friends there, that one was in mid-May. If I’m not mistaken, they are doing one in Newark at the end of May, and then the other ones are down south and on the west coast as well? Pretty big tour from what she has told me”.

“Wow, that’s an impressive gig,” Rosé commented, genuinely surprised.

She grabbed the paper bag from the counter, waving goodbye to the two employees, “Well, divas, I’ll leave you to do your jobs. Thanks for the info, I guess my set has to be delayed a bit to deliver these to my girl, and hope to cheer her up a bit, wish me luck!” 

The other two waved her off as she exited the diner. 

The pink-haired girl grabbed her phone from her purse and quickly texted Jan and Lagoona to meet her at her place after her set. 

Maybe she had just found the perfect birthday present for her Nali.

Rosé and Lagoona were sitting at the kitchen table, the Scottish girl’s computer between them open on the ticketing site while Jan was busy gushing with her girlfriend over the phone in the living room.

The blue-haired girl stared at the laptop, clicking her tongue, “Is that the VIP price for both…?”

“Nope, just one. I could afford to get only one VIP ticket for her so she’ll get to enjoy it all by herself”, Rosé replied.

“Holy shit, I fucking wish you were this in love with me to spend that much money for my birthday!” Lagoona commented jokingly before noticing a small detail, “Wait, did you see the date of the concert?”

The pink-haired girl nodded, “Yes, I am aware that the concert happens to be on my birthday. However, this is an opportunity I can’t let Nali give up on,” she reasoned, “Also, I plan on spending many more birthdays with her, so her spending mine doing something she loves makes me happy as well”.

Lagoona shot up and started reaching for kitchen drawers, seemingly looking for something.

“Can I know what the fuck are you doing?”, Rosé asked, arching her manicured brow.

“Looking for a whip because you’re fucking whipped for the girl! I can’t believe it!”, her best friend cackled, actively avoiding the kitchen towel thrown at her.

“Oh, fuck you, bitch!”, the pink-haired girl said in return, unable to hide her own grin at the situation.

At that moment, their purple-haired friend entered the room, saying her goodbyes over the phone before she sat down on the opposite side of Rosé.

“Oh look, who decided to join us!” Lagoona teased as she sat back next to the Scottish girl, “how was the call with the sugar mommy?”

Jan blushed furiously, “Shush, you two! Jackie’s not my sugar mommy! She just… happens to be richer and older than me. Also, she called me because she’s stressed from organizing this big event in May and needed some advice!”, she blurted out, only causing the other two to laugh even harder.

“Yeah, sure whatever you say, Stuntalina the sugar baby. C’mon, I’ve got a new piece I wrote for us to show you!”, Rosé said as she closed the ticket receipt.

She opened her music editing program, pressed play on the last recorded file.

While her best friends were busy enjoying the new song she produced, Rosé checked her phone to find a new text from Denali.

10:52 PM:

thank u so much for the pastries, I really needed them today. You always know how to cheer me up. Goodnight my Rosie <3

The singer smiled. 

She couldn’t wait to show Denali her birthday present.

Denali was lying down on the couch, her eyes on her best friend - and soon-to-be ex-roommate - as she packed the last few things she needed to move out.

“I still can’t believe you’re moving out,” the brunette pouted, “You’re leaving me allllll aloooooooneeeee”, she said dramatically.

“Nali, you’re acting as if I’m moving across the country”, Olivia chuckled, “I’m literally moving in with Utica and Symone, and they live across the street”.

The Alaskan skater threw her head back, “So close, yet so far”.

The younger girl rolled her eyes, reaching for a silver sharpie before throwing it to Denali, “Okay, miss Dramanali. Will you get your ass up and help me finish labeling these boxes?”

It took them a little over an hour to have most of Olivia’s things labeled and boxed, ready to be taken to their new home.

A bottle of soju later, they sat together on the couch in front of the TV as they ate some take-out for dinner, reminiscing of their time as roommates.

“It’s going to be weird to live alone,” Denali confessed as she took a piece of kimbap with her steel chopsticks, “We’ve been roommates ever since I literally moved in from Chicago. But I know it’s the right thing for you, you know”.

Olivia nodded, “I didn’t expect it to take this turn, I mean, I started it out a year ago single and now I’m dating not just one but two of the most awesome people I know?”

“I remember you being bummed when Utica started dating Symone. I sneaked out way too much ice cream from the diner to cheer you up, but look at you now, dating both Utica and Symone, moving in with them? You won the jackpot, Liv!”, the older girl replied, smacking her free hand against the other girl’s thigh.

“Girl, I could say the same about you and miss Rosie. All lovey-dovey, sweet kisses and I love you’s”, Olivia winked as she saw Denali’s cheeks take a pink tint.

“Actually…”, the skater confessed, “she technically hasn’t said the big L word out loud, not like that at least”.

Denali was sure Olivia’s eyes were about to pop out of their sockets, “WHAT?”

The brunette smiled shyly.

“It’s just… this past year everything has been so perfect with her and what if forcing her to say it will ruin that?”

“Nali, baby, the girl basically lives here. Do I have to remind you just how many times I’ve walked in on you two doing the whole devil’s tango while she looks at you like a lovesick puppy and you are worried about her not saying I love you back?”

The Alaskan girl tried to lighten the mood, “To our defense, you did say that you were spending the night out and that movie was very intense-”

“Nali…”

“I love her, Liv. Like really really love her. And I do see a future with her, but she is such a free spirit, someone who says and does things her own way and I’m worried that I’m going to scare her away,” Denali bit her lower lip, trying her best to not let the emotions get the best of her.

The younger girl took her hand, “Do you remember what I told you that day at the rink when you were scared to ask her out?”

“That you would unleash Kandy on her?”

They both chuckled.

“That’s still on the table if she breaks your heart,” Olivia replied honestly, holding Denali’s hand, “I told you to give it a chance. Tell her about how you feel your relationship is heading, and I got a feeling that she feels the same as you do”.

The two friends savored the moment, only the sound coming from outside the window to fill the void.

Denali was the first one to speak up after a couple of minutes of silence, “See? Who am I supposed to have those heart-to-heart conversations with if I’m alone? The wall?”

Olivia laughed out loud, “The cat lady that lives on the first floor sure seems like a good replacement for me!”

“Donut would run away before I could even let her in, girl”.

“True that,” she took another bite of her rice bowl before setting it down and getting up from the couch, “maybe, after you have your talk with your pink highlighter girlfriend in time for your birthday next week, she can babysit your pillow princess ass!” 

Denali’s mouth was wide open in shock but unable to restrain the laughter. 

“Liv! How dare you!” she said as the younger girl bolted into her room, prompting a not-so-sober chase.

They would totally be getting an angry noise complaint the next day.

Denali felt like her birthday went faster than she would have liked.

It had started with a call from her mom while her friends were trying to make her breakfast in bed - emphasis on trying - only to end up ordering delivery from the bakery two blocks down the street. 

Since she would have still had to work that day, they had opted to hang out at her place the night before, waiting up to midnight to wish her a happy birthday. 

What Denali was really looking forward to was the cute night-in her girlfriend had promised along with her mysterious birthday gift that was seemingly months in the making.

Having barely made it home from the diner, the brunette had just taken off her jacket and scarf when she heard a familiar knock pattern on her door.

She smiled as she was greeted by a small bouquet of forget-me-nots, a bag seemingly full of takeaway boxes, and a bottle of Rosé.

“Isn’t it cannibalism if you drink Rosé?” she teased, letting her girlfriend in the apartment and closing the door behind her.

“I’m letting that slide because it’s your birthday, baby,” the pink-haired girl replied as she set everything down on the kitchen counter.

Denali took a moment to take in how her Rosie looked.

The signature pink leather jacket was open to reveal a very deep low cut top that left close to nothing to the imagination. The black high-waisted jeans hugged her curves in a way that drove Denali crazy just to think about. 

“Liking the view, mama?”, Rosé’s smirk was one of the few things able to make her weak to her knees like that.

“You’re a tease-y bitch”

“Thank you for noticing”, she winked as she walked over to Denali and sneaked her arms around her girlfriend’s waist, towering over her thanks to the pumps she was wearing.

The brunette couldn’t help but smile as she wrapped her arms around Rosé’s neck, getting on her tippy toes to kiss her.

“Happy birthday, my angel”, she whispered against her lips before her strong arms picked Denali up with a small yelp from the younger girl.

“What about dinner?”, she chuckled.

“I’m in a mood to eat something else right now…”, Rosé simply said as she reconnected their lips and started taking her girlfriend to the familiar bedroom.

Denali lied with her head on Rosé’s chest like she always did after they slept together. She could fall asleep just with how the older girl was gently combing her hair with her fingers.

“Don’t fall asleep on me, mama. You still got my birthday gift to open up”, she whispered, making Denali chuckle.

“What? Wasn’t the mind-blowing sex your birthday present?” she teased.

She could feel Rosé smile against her hair, “Thanks for the ego boost, diva, but I think you’ll like the real present more”

She went to reach for the pink jacket on the floor, taking out an envelope and giving it to Denali.

“What is this?”

“Open it up and find out for yourself”

The brunette straightened herself, not caring about the sheets pooling at her waist, and opened the present.

She couldn’t believe her eyes.

“You’re kidding me?!”

“Well, it’s not my fault your birthday happens to be on April Fool’s day but it’s all real, angel”, Rosé smiled at her.

“Ahhh! VIP Tickets for Blackpink’s concert?! I love you!”, Denali blurted out and went on to hug her girlfriend.

When she felt the older girl get slightly stiff, she realized just what she had blurted out and did what she did best: she panicked.

“Oh gosh, sorry I didn’t-”

Rosé didn’t reply, just went on cupping her face to calm her down.

“Baby, it’s okay. Don’t ever feel sorry for how you feel”, she reassured, kissing her forehead, “I just… don’t have the best track record when it comes to being told those three little words. I know how strongly I feel about you. I just want to mean it 100% when I say it, okay?”

Denali nodded, not trusting her words as she knew how hard it was for her girlfriend to talk about her feelings.

Rosé tilted her head, “Now, let me snuggle my…”, she looked over Denali’s shoulder, the clock read 11:05 PM, “birthday girl for another hour”.

She went on to press her girlfriend’s body against hers. She let a couple of minutes pass, making sure that the shorter girl had calmed down.

“Sing me to sleep, Rosie?”, she heard the faintest voice coming from the younger girl, whose arms held her sides tightly.

“Anything for you, angel”.

Almost two months later, Denali couldn’t believe she was actually there, waiting under the smaller stage for the concert to begin.

The soundcheck had been overwhelming, she definitely had almost cried when the girls waved at her section of the crowd. She was sure Lisa was waving at her.

She had even managed to become friends with some of the other fans in the VIP section, having gone to the concert alone - she still was a bit sad that she was missing Rosé’s birthday but understood the argument that this was one in a lifetime opportunity that she couldn’t pass on. 

“I can’t believe how close we are to the stage!” one of the girls to Denali’s right, Sakura, commented, “Based on the videos from the other dates, this is definitely the best side to be on, especially during Lisa’s dance solo!”

“Girl, I know! I’m ready to see her shake that ass!” Denali replied, making both of them chuckle.

“Oh, is that how it is, mama?”

Denali froze.

Was that…

“Rosie?”

There was her girlfriend, sporting the VIP tag around her neck and around her wrist.

“How did you get in? I thought you didn’t manage to get another ticket?”, while she was beyond ecstatic to see her girlfriend there with her at the concert, she was also very confused.

“Up until a couple of hours ago, I didn’t have it, so that was as much of a surprise to you as it is to you,” she smiled, “Remember I told you about how Jan’s girlfriend was busy organizing a big event?” she asked as she recollected what had just happened hours prior.

Both Rosé and Lagoona were sitting on the former girl’s couch, watching reruns of America’s Got Talent and commenting how there would totally be no competition if they decided to audition.

Jan walked in, sipping on her frappuccino, “I know you love us but why aren’t you spending your birthday with your girlfriend?”

“I told you she’s at that Blackpink’s concert today” Rosé reminded her, lowering the TV volume.

“Blackpink? Oh! That’s the project Jackie was helping with organizing. She even offered me a full VIP ticket. Do you want it? It’s barely 3 PM, you just missed the soundcheck”.

The two friends sitting on the couch looked at each other, then at Jan, then back at each other before bolting up from the couch.

“COULDN’T HAVE YOU SAID SOMETHING EARLIER, JANICE?”

“I can’t believe it, Jan is really something else,” Denali smiled, now feeling that everything was complete.

“Me neither, baby. That girl is a mystery,” Rosé replied as she positioned herself behind her shorter girlfriend to hug her from behind, kissing Denali’s cheek “Now, I can check out my competition with the other Rosie in your life”, she joked.

“I promise you’ll be a Blink by the end of the night,” Denali said confidently, melting against the embrace.

“We’ll see about that, little diva”.

When people said time flies by when you’re having fun, Denali just realized how fast.

The concert was a rollercoaster of emotions, from the powerful beginning to the member’s solos - she definitely didn’t miss her girlfriend’s ‘mom dancing’ behind her. 

And now, the soft guitar notes of Hope Not filled the stadium. The ballad had always been one of Denali’s favorites, those raw emotions she had felt so many times were being so beautifully sang out loud and it made her teary-eyed.

Rosé kept her arms secured around her waist, rocking her from side to side. The brunette closed her eyes, fully letting the song guide her.

That’s when she heard Rosé’s voice in her ear, so quiet yet overpowering everything else.

“I love you”.

Denali’s eyes shot open and quickly turned around to be met with the most beautiful smile Rosé had ever given to her, she could only see pure love in her eyes staring back at her. 

She hadn’t even realized the tears spilled down her cheeks as she went in to connect their lips.

Nothing else mattered to her at that moment.

It was just her and her Rosie.

The warm autumn air filled Denali’s living room as they cuddled on the couch, watching a movie.

It was almost midnight when the end credits started rolling, the younger girl was already half-asleep, clinging to her girlfriend like a koala bear.

Rosé turned off the TV and turned her attention to her girlfriend, “C’mon, little diva, let go of me, I have to catch the bus home”.

Denali grunted, “Noooo, don’t leave meee,” she protested, her cheek firmly against Rosé’s chest.

“I gotta get home, baby”, the pink-haired girl tried to reason.

“This is your home too. You should just move in already,” Denali replied, slugging her words.

Her heart skipped a beat. 

Rosé stopped for a moment to think about it. She smiled looking down at her girlfriend’s serene face. 

She definitely could see herself wanting to wake up to that every day for a long time.

Denali woke up in her bed the following day, not remembering how she had gotten there. The last thing she remembered was falling asleep on the couch with-

She shot up and went to the kitchen. She found a still-warm cup of coffee and a note.

She almost choked on the drink as she read the small piece of paper.

I thought you’d never ask

to move in together

Get those papers ready, angel

Your Rosie

PS: we’ve some remodeling to do, mama

Denali couldn’t help the pink tint from erupting across her face. She definitely blamed her sleepy self for being so open with her girlfriend.

On the other side, she had to call her landlord.

Her search for a roommate was over for good.

[cloveroctobers]

ROBERT “BOBBY” MCKENZIE —

IG info/bio : @/returnofdamckenzie | 426k followers | @/mclitgs2 is my forever boo🤟🏽😍 while @/cardib is my WIFE! She just doesn’t know it yet ❤️ support my work & be part of my family: @/bobbymckcares

24 (25) years young

Born in Dundee, raised in Glasgow, Scotland

Jamaican father named Badrick who is a African studies professor

Caucasian/Scottish mother named Catriona who used to be a au pair but now works as a receptionist in senior living — one eye is honey hazel and the other a dark brown

It was difficult growing up in a school that didn’t accept Bobby being biracial, it resulted in bullying to the point where he needed to switch schools (A lawsuit was also in place) The next school was slightly better but Bobby slowly learned to accept himself as it was not something he could control and not something he would want to in the first place. He was proud of where he came from and never thought he was better or less than anyone else, that wasn’t how he was raised

He’s an only child, his parents thought about adopting (and fostering) but with Bobby they had their hands full and he was just enough for them

His family is very family-oriented so he would never have to feel lonely since they gave him a lot of attention, slightly making him spoiled but he was also around his cousins & spending time with them as well

He’s extremely close to his younger cousin (only by a few months) Femi who he views as his sister. They’ve been through a lot together and are always there for each other so it only makes sense

Most likely an active kid always up to some sort of shenanigans whether it’s by himself or with his group of friends, “why would you do that Bobby?” “Don’t ask why but ask, why not!?”

Definitely suffered some broken bones, concussions, & sprain injuries but would never show signs of pain...guys got a high pain tolerance that’s for sure

Fan of films/series “stand by me” & “the goonies” & “scooby doo” since he feels they relate to his life??

Hospital caterer and loves making those feel better with food that he’s created. If he can’t put a smile on patients face with words then he feels like he can show them with food

Food is an art to him. He went to school for culinary & it’s very important for him to show how much it is to him. He picked up the craft from of course his family, who always used food for numerous of things: to bring people together is one of them

Perfected Jerk haggis, it is now he favorite dish next to desert & breakfast!

I’m struggling to figure out what sign he maybe? He’s very playful which may come off as childish at times, which makes me think of Leo? (Maybe Gemini?) Only because they usually hold onto their childhood as best as they can, very generous, & give their energy to you but I also don’t see him being a fire sign at all? So maybe very little Leo in his chart. I also feel like he might be a bit of an empath? He knows when situations around him don’t feel right, knows how to read the room, and always wants to help others by lighting things up.

Idk but I’m feeling he’s libra sun + Gemini moon + Leo rising? Who knows

Probably lived in a 2 bed flat with his old uni mate. It was small and a bit shit but it was their shit and they made the best of it

Now lives in a stone cottage or farmhouse with MC that was built in the 1900’s & is slightly haunted. He’s decided to call them Duncan??? But he believes they’re a good spirit, maybe even a friendly ghost!? since he got comfortable with the bizarre happenings in the new flat & it doesn’t seem like they want to hurt them

Lottie offered to bring her ouija board next time she visited—Bobby declined

House is mostly neutral based but three of the rooms in the flat are covered in ridiculous patterned walls or furniture much to MC’s distaste but, “what’s yours is mine” right? No. But Gary approves!

Has two dogs: a terrier & a collie since MC wasn’t down for getting a sheep

They do have chickens to raise their own eggs tho!

Definitely the kind of significant other that will ride on the cart when they’re out grocery shopping, will make you breakfast in bed, & will send you memes while he’s at home and you’re out or even when he’s at work and you’re at home, let’s you put his arm to sleep when you’re laying on it in bed (big ass head gang!), definitely chooses the candles from bath & body works that smell like food items (majority of them suck let’s be honest)

Probably smells like cucumber, melons, lemons, and eucalyptus

Has your wedding date in his IG bio & is proud

Annoys Gary & Lottie with his food pics, “oh, Not this shit again! 😡 looks brilliant, but enough!”

Has zoom/FaceTime movie nights with Marisol & MC who stopped feeling like she was third-wheeling months ago

Talks to hope & Noah (in the background) as much as he can. Feels like they’re his inspiration for love, even tho he’s the only one married out of the villa

He values marriage just like his parents do and often has Sunday dinners with them & MC ofc

Probably has relationship guide books and only reads them out of boredom but finds fascinating facts/advice if he pays attention & tries to apply it to his relationship with mc. If it works, it works! & If it doesn’t, you can’t say he didn’t try!

Works long hours but will still come home to cook for MC or brings leftovers from the events he’s catered (most are for the hospital but occasionally he’ll do other events)

Has a separate IG for his work

When WAP dropped, he almost lost his shit. Even tried to get MC to do the challenge with him, he’s pretty bad but MC eventually learned it just for him 😜

Is thrilled that Cardi made the best decision EVER on divorcing offset, “are you thinking of leaving me now?” “... I might.” “BOBBY!” “Haha, I love you!

Absolutely loves Christmas!!! It’s his favorite holiday and he loves giving back to everyone in his life. Usually he’s working overtime for the holidays & it makes him emotional due to the stories he hears & he puts a little extra love in his food

Goes all out for Christmas. Tries to buy/make everyone something. Even if he doesn’t really care for them...he’ll at least send them a x-mas card, if they keep it or burn it it’s entirely up to them—if he knew about it he’d probably be a little sad not gonna lie...he’s a soft king

Once bought Lottie black crocs with spooky pins , “are you joking Bobby?!” He knows she secretly loved them

Uses salt and peppermint in his dark hot cocoa...

Rather make deserts for Christmas than the food, he feels like it’s his duty

King of giving the thumbs up, especially when situations have gone to shit. He’ll still shoot them up with a smile or a grimace

Always inviting someone somewhere. “Bobby, hun. You’re 4-6 hrs away and it’s 1 am.” Hope groaned after listening to his bright idea, thinking something bad happened. “Ah, you could still make it if you tried, lassie.” “I’m gonna hang up now. Good night, bonkers man.”

Needs constant reminding when to get his locs touched up & moisturized

Either has a trampoline or a funhouse jumper in his backyard (maybe both) “we’ve got the space and this is better than a pool, or almost!”

Wants children, a whole footie team! There’s no specific time frame for him, when it happens, it happens

Used to cool & wet temps & loves vacationing in Greenland. Sure the hot weather he experienced in the villa was awesome & something different than what he’s used to but you can’t take the scot out of the man. So he typically sticks to places that are similar in temps, that way he doesn’t have to change his clothing choices much

Loves a good bath. Bubble baths are better than bath bombs to him, PERIOD!

Loves bubbles so much he put too much laundry detergent in the wash (does this on purpose now) and came back home to the dogs and room covered in it. Do you think he cleaned it up before MC came home? No. He decided to have a bubble party in the room with a Caribbean playlist playing in the background

MC definitely posted about it the first time & joined him for a bit, dreading the work that came with cleaning it all up. Now whenever Bobby needs a bubble party, he knows what to do. MC preferred him to have his little bubble party in the tub but 50% of the time he chooses not to listen & they leave him to pout & clean it himself

Likes to hold hands with fingers interlocked. When it’s cold and if you’re both wearing hoodies, he’ll slide his hand inside the arm of your hoodie to help keep you warm

Canon: His version of a snack is spaghetti hoops on toast & can eat that for the rest of his life & be content

If he didn’t end up marrying MC, probably finds his significant other working as a nurse at one of the hospitals he caters to or a volunteer at a old folks home

Never had a serious relationship, very few hookups, was either always placed in the friend zone or there was one person he wanted to be serious with but they rejected him and continued loving someone else who treated them like shit—so he kinda swore off of relationships and just flirted a bunch and kept his love life non-existent

Fav ice cream? Rocky road ice cream with one scoop of cotton candy & one scoop of cookie butter blue

Doesn’t believe in measuring when it comes to culinary. He uses his eyes as his measurement, could be a bad thing, could be a good thing, that’s up to you

If he’s up at night, he’s eating something sweet. A nice glass of single malt scotch whiskey + a splash of coconut milk (🤢) with a slice of angel food cake & he’s out like a light

Absolutely loves shopping for the kitchen, finds immense joy in doing so. If you lose him in a store, one of the places you’ll most likely find him is in the kitchen decor area

Owns a bagpipe & wants to get better at it, even tho he scared the living shit out of his dogs & chickens

Wears his shades quite a bit even tho the weather is hardly sunny and mainly windy & damp

Will hold the door for strangers even if they don’t say thank you

He’s open when it comes to music. Will listen to anything but feels like the music has to be a purpose for something...Everything he does in his day to day life has to feel like a soundtrack to him since in his mind he’s daydreaming about his life being made into a movie. Who isn’t?

He thinks wentworth Miller should play him in a film and that kid from blackish should play him when he was a wee lad, Marcus Scribner

Always keeps a positive attitude because he knows what it feels like to feel low and he doesn’t want anybody else in the world to feel like that so he wants to uplift and if he can try to be someone’s happiness he’ll gladly be that— which isn’t always the right move, he learned

Listens to: Rotimi, Shaggy, Sean Paul, Skip Marley, H.E.R., Jhene Aiko, Jorja Smith, UMI, The Kooks, The Killers, Cold War kids, Milky chance, Blood Orange, The 1975, Vampire Weekend, Bad Suns, BRYSON TILLER, Kilo Kish, & Ella Eyre (although he misses her old music)

Celeb crushes? Cardi B is his mfkin celeb wife okay?! Nobody else comes above her! He also thinks FKA twigs is pretty & super talented, sevdaliza!, Tia & Tamera, Iman, and brandy from the 90s makes him swoon

Anthem = jaden, “Boys and Girls”

[jovialyouthmusic]

Meet my OC

Thanks to @drakeandcamilleofvaltoria for tagging me, I’d already written most of it as i thought it was such a great idea . Here is Sophia Turner of ‘Protect and Serve’ and ‘Silver Service’ Face claim is model and singer Adeline Mocke. I know the original title was ‘Meet my MC’, but hey....

Fashion sense Sophia is practical and wears what suits her. Bastien knows she looks spectacular in a cocktail dress or ballgown

Does she like how she looks? Mostly yes, but she thinks her nose is just a little too long

Is she an only child? Yes

Is she a morning or night person? Very much a night owl. Bastien knows better than to try to hurry her in the morning. Best ways to wake her up are the smell of fresh coffee or oral sex.

Is she a cat or dog person? She loves cats as they are independent creatures. She was afraid of dogs as a child and although she’s gotten over it, she’s still not fond of them.

Got any favourite foods? She loves seafood and fish - crab and lobster in particular

What are her favourite movies/ TV shows? She is a Sci fi fan, and followed Star Trek avidly when she was young. She likes a good medical drama and classic British sitcoms such as Fawlty Towers and Father Ted

Does she have any hidden talents? She is proficient at self defence and practices Tai Chi to a relatively high level. When she trained in karate she stopped short of brown belt, but Bastien has persuaded her to try to get up to black belt level.

Does she believe in love at first sight? She does, and Bastien certainly made an impression on her, but love developed over time, it wasn’t a bolt from the blue.

Who is her love interest? Bastien, Captain of the Kings Guard!

What is she afraid of? She is claustrophobic and hates enclosed spaces or rooms without windows.

What are her guilty pleasures? She has a sweet tooth and loves ice cream. She secretly reads trashy romance novels.

What was her dream job as a kid? She wanted to be a writer. Thanks to Regina, she has written a book on Cordonian folklore and plans to write another on Scottish folklore

Has she ever broken a bone? No

Has she ever been in trouble with the law? No, her father is a police officer

+three other random facts about her!

Random skill – she is a great belly dancer, but only performs for Bastien.

She went vegetarian in her late teens and still rarely eats red meat, but loves fish.

She loves flowers, but is reluctant to tell Bastien she prefers to see them growing, not cut in a bouquet.

@bobasheebaby​ @sirbeepsalot​ @katedrakeohd​ @ritachacha​

[cutmyhairabovemyjaw]

Time Boy Chapter 2: Dear Santa

Amelia and I kneel beside our bed, eyes closed, hands in prayer. We decided to finally ask someone for help about the crack in the wall. For as long as I can remember, I’ve heard whispers from the wall. They tell me about the Atraxi, the Sisters of the Water and a man named Vincent just to name a few. I try to talk back but nothing works. It wasn’t an issue until Amelia started to hear them. Aunt Sharon wouldn’t listen, she never listens. So, we turned to the only other person we trust.

“Dear Santa, thank you for the dolls, the pencils and the fish. It’s Easter now, so I hope I didn’t wake you. But honest, it is an emergency.”

She looks over to me with kind eyes, I softly stutter “Its about the crack in our wall”. “Aunt Sharon says it’s just an ordinary crack, but we know it’s not, because, at night, there’s voices.” I always wrote down everything I heard into my diary. I wasn’t planning on ever showing Amelia my writings, but she looked utterly terrified when she first heard ‘Prisoner Zero has escaped’. I needed to let her know she wasn’t alone. “So please, please could you send someone to fix it? Or a policeman? Or…” She trails off. We could both hear a distant whirring and whooshing and, finally, a crash. We look to each other in surprise, maybe it worked? “Back in a moment”. We run to the window looking out onto the backyard and that’s when I saw it. That beautiful big blue box. Our hearts swell. “Thank you, Santa” we say in sync. Amelia and run to our gumboots, hers red, mine blue and a flashlight each. Hand-in-hand, we run to the treasure that’s fallen from the sky.

We stand near the glowing box now. As I stand there, I feel the box’s pain and excitement. I slowly approach the blue treasure and gently place my palm against its side.  I feel it hum as my body fills with warmth. This peacefulness was soon interrupted as its doors swing open. I run back to A and hide behind her arm, peaking around her. A grappling hook comes flying out of the box and landing beside me. We didn’t have time to be confused about that however, as two hands soon appeared grasping to the edge of the box. And soon, those hands were replaced by a face.

“Can I have an apple?”

He stares at us, an indescribable emotion within his eyes. His hair is drenched, he’s covered in sweat, and he’s crawling out of a magic box. Who are you?

“All I can think about – apples. I love apples. Maybe I’m having a craving. That’s new – never had cravings before.”

He rambles. I can’t stop looking into his green eyes. They look old and tired yet fiery and eager. I feel safe. I only ever feel safe with A, but I think this magic man might actually be able to help us. Amelia and I stand strong together, both strangely comfortable. He lifts himself so that he looks down into the box.

“Woah! Look at that!” My sister and I stand confused. What could he be looking at? That box would barely fit him. “Are you OK?” We both ask. He giggles, “Just had a fall. All the way down there, right to the library. Hell of a climb back up.” I hear the whispers again. “TARDIS”, I repeat. He looks at me, perplexed, “What did you say?” Amelia breaks his thought, “You’re soaking wet.” “I was in the swimming pool” he replies. “You said you were in the library”. “So was the swimming pool”. Swimming pool? Library? All in this TARDIS? “Are you policeman?” I ask, uncharacteristically loudly. He leans forward, concerned, “Why? Did you call a policeman?” “Did you come about the crack in our wall” I respond. “What craaa?”

He twitches and squirms, falling off the box in pain, landing in the dirt. I run over to him, my small hands slowly hold his face. “Are you alright Doctor?”. Who is this little girl? He thought as he took in her galactic eyes. “Yes, little one, I’m ok”. I walk back to A as the she asks, “Who are you?”. He lifts his hands and holds them in from of his eyes. His hands glow as gold little fairies dance around his fingers. It’s the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. “I don’t know yet, still cooking. Does it scare you?” He asks us. Amelia responds defiantly, “No, it just looks a bit weird.” He laughs, “No, no, no. The crack in your wall.” His tone serious now, “Does it scare you?”. We pause, Amelia and I look to each other, interlock our hands. “Yes”.

He jumps to his feet, “Well then, no time to lose. I’m the Doctor. Do everything I tell you, don’t ask stupid questions, and don’t wander off”.

Little did he know…

After the ordeal that was finding food to satisfy the Doctor’s mad cravings – apples, yoghurt, bacon, beans, bread and butter, carrots – the time boy was finally sitting at our dinning table, eating of all things, fish fingers and custard. A and I opened up the ice-cream and stared at the bizarre man with the custard moustache.

“Funny.” Amelia notes. “Am I? Good. Funny’s good”. Like names from a fairy tale I hear the whispers call. “What are your names?” He asks. “Amelia Pond”, “Lunabelle Pond” we state one after the other.

“Ah, those are brilliant names. Amelia and Lunabelle Pond, like names from a fairy tale” - “Like names from fairy tale” - the Doctor and I say at the same time.

Who is this little girl? He stares at me; the weirdest emotion plays out on his face.

“Are we in Scotland, Amelia?” he questions. “No. We had to move to England. It’s rubbish.” Everyone knew that A hated England. Everyone also knew that she would do everything in her power to keep her Scottish accent. “And what about you Lunabelle? Where are you from, you don’t sound Scottish.” I grab Amelia’s hand and tap my little finger twice on her skin, letting her know I didn’t want to tell the Doctor the truth. “She’s adopted. We don’t know where she was born.” Amelia tries to lie as smoothly as she can. The Doctor’s eyes flick between us. He knows we’re not telling the whole story but decides not to press on further. “King Ju-ah of the u-ah tribe was adopted. Best leader that planet ever had.” He says. “I’ll have to ask the whispers about him”. We pause, maybe he’s just as insane as I am.

“So, what about your mum and dad, then? Are they upstairs? Thought we'd have woken them by now.”

“We don't have a mum and dad. Just an aunt.”

“I don't even have an aunt.”

“You're lucky.” We both say.

“I know. So, your aunt. Where is she?”

“She's out.” Amelia can’t even remember the last time she saw her Aunt. I remember her exactly.

“And she left you all alone?”

“We’re not scared.”

“Of course, you’re not scared. You’re not scared of anything! Box falls out of the sky, man falls out of box, man eats fish custard, and look at you two, just sitting there. Listening to the whispers. So, you know what I think?”

“What?” I question.

“Must be a hell of a scary crack in your wall.”

We freeze. Amelia squeezes my hand, she’s scared. We both are.

 “You’ve had some cowboys in here. Not actual cowboys, though that can happen.” Amelia runs downstairs, finding one of the only things she can remember her mum doing. While she’s downstairs the Doctors kneels in front of me, meeting my eyeline. “Now, Luna” he says softly, “these whispers, do they come from the crack?”. “I think so, but sometimes there’s 3 different voices. A man, a woman and…the silence.” “What do they say little one.” “Things that don’t make sense. The man tells me of the time vortex, of Gallifrey, instructions on how to fly a time machine. The woman helps me, she flows like a River, she helps me write in my diary, warns me of the future and promises that we will some day meet.” “And the silence?” My voice quivers, “The silence tells me of different races, species and beings spread across all that is known and beyond. And then, they flicker away, and where I used to hear children laughing, I hear a deafening silence. But most importantly the tell me,

The universe is cracked, the Pandorica will open and Silence will fall”.

The Doctor says nothing, instead, scanning me with what I know to be a sonic screwdriver. He analyses what the results are. “Impossible” He scans the crack and reads the results once more. “Completely impossible”.  Before I can ask, Amelia comes back with her favourite apples.

“I used to hate apples, so my mum put faces on them.”

“She sounds good, your mum. I'll keep it for later. This wall is solid, and the crack doesn't go all the way through it. So, here's a thing - where's the draught coming from? Wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey. You know what the crack is?

“What?”

“It's a crack. I'll tell you something funny. If you knocked this wall down, the crack would stay put, cos the crack isn't in the wall.”

“Where is it, then?”

“Everywhere” I tell them both. “It’s a split in the skin of the world. Two parts of space and time that should never have touched, pressed together right here in the wall of your bedroom.” Little one, Amelia, what can you hear? “Prisoner Zero has escaped” We both say.

“It means that, on the other side of this wall, there's a prison and they've lost a prisoner. Do you know what that means? You need a better wall. The only way to close the breach is to open it all the way. The forces will invert, and it'll snap itself shut. Or…You know when grown-ups tell you everything's going to be fine and you think they're probably lying to make you feel better?

“Yes” Amy sighs.

“Everything’s going to be fine.”

He holds out his hands for either of us to grab. It feels comfortable, homely. He waves his sonic over the crack it opens, showing the darkness behind it.”

“Hello? Hello?”

A huge blue eye shoots out of no-where. It’s exactly how it looks in my head. It stares right at me. I shake and stand behind the Doctor. He notices my fear and shuts the crack once more. Before it is finally closed, a light flies out and lands in his pocket.

“You see, told you it would close. Good as new”

“That wasn’t Prisoner Zero.” I tell the Doctor. He agrees, “No I think that was Prisoner Zero’s guard. Whatever it was, it sent me a message. Physic paper, takes a lovely little message.”

“I have one of those!” I run to my wardrobe showing the doctor my smaller version. He stares at it, perplexed. “From the crack?” he asks me. “I think so. From the woman.” “Keep it safe little one. Now, what did the guard say.”  He opens his physic paper and reveals the message, “Prisoner Zero has escaped. But why tell us? Unless…Unless Prisoner Zero escaped through here. But he couldn’t have. We’d know.” He’s frustrated, “It’s difficult. Brand-new me, nothing works yet. But there’s something I’m missing.”

I feel physic paper heat up. I open it and read inside, “In the corner of your eye.” We all slowly turn. BONG, BONG. “No, no, no, no, no, no!” The Doctor yells and runs down to the TARDIS us Pond’s hot on his heels. “I’ve got to get back in there. The engines are phasing, it’s gong to burn!” He runs around, grabbing the hook he originally threw and jumps back up so that he sits on the side of the box.

“But! It’s just a box! How can a box have engines?” Amelia states desperately confused. It’s not a box, it’s a time machine, the whispers again.

“It’s not a box, it’s a time machine” – “It’s not a box, it’s a time machine” – The doctor and I reply simultaneously.

“Can we come?” Amelia asks.

“Not safe in here, not yet. Five minutes, give me five minutes, I’ll be right back.”

“People always say that” Amelia dejectedly says, looking to the ground.

The Doctor hops off the box and crouches down and looks at A, “Am I people? Do I even look like people? Trust me, I’m the Doctor.” She smiles, filled with wonder and hope. He looks to me now, and I hold his face once more. “And you, little one, you never loose that diary, or the physic paper. And never be scared.” I already knew that he wouldn’t be back in 5 minutes more like 12 years. “My Doctor, you are always forgiven. I’m sorry for what is to come, but you will be brilliant. Oh Time Boy, till the next.” The Doctor is determined to decrypt this girl. She can’t be real. He stares and pauses, then hops right up and sits above the TARDIS. He smiles once more.

“GERONIMO!!!” He flies into the box, the doors slamming shut seconds later. The box begins to fade away, that noise we heard at the start of the night, plays again. Amelia runs upstairs and begins to pack. I feel bad for her, for the next 12 years, she we feel rejected and alone.

With her beanie, gumboots, coat and suitcase, A sits outside waiting for that magic box to appear. First the 5-minute mark passes, then 10, an hour or two. Amelia cries, we comfort each other and camp out under the stars. The first night of waiting.

[queennicoleinboots]

Rebellious Refried Court of Royal Bears

Count King Joebear – a big Italian bear who is married to Countess Queen Xara. He loves ice cream, chips without salt, red meat, fish, cinnamon, berries, and honey. He is a nerd who likes to know things and is a conspiracy catbear. He does a lot of research on the dark web. In his past life, he was JoJo the Great Black Bear.

Count King Albear-

A Whole New Bear

His name is Count King

Allllbear

He's the twin of Joebear

Still as sexy as can be

He can show you the world

Shining, sexiness, seething

Tell me, count kings, now when did

You last let your butt decide?

He can open your cheeks

Take you wonder by wonder

Over, sideways and under

On a magic big bear ride

A whole new bear

A new beartastic point of view

No one to question the growls

Or the bear dances

Or say we're only eating

A whole new bear

A fucked-up bear I never knew

But when I'm being clawed

It's crystal clear

That now you're a whole new bear with me

Unbelievable paws

Super sexual FEELINGS

Dancing, fumbling, eating fish and berries

Through a series of being clawed

A whole new bear (don't you dare fuck with him)

A hundred thousand things to hear

He's like a shooting star

He's come so far

His jizz tastes like honey

A whole new bear (Every growl a surprise)

With count king rants to pursue

I'll listen anytime

There's always something going on

Let me share this whole new bear with you

A whole new bear (A whole new bear)

That's whom he'll be (That's whom he'll be)

A thrilling bear

A wondrous count

For you and me

King Bruce Ice – formerly known as Bruce Ice, Bruce Ace, Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing, and Agent A-B A-B, a big Russian brown bear who has a strong voice with a hint of Southern accent and is married to Queen Megara Ice and has two dogs named Riley and Duke Ice. He loves to fix brakes, lead the Secret Society of Sexually-Frustrated Bears, and be a superbear. In his most recent past life, he was a cross between a spider and a bear. His name was Peter Bruce Parker. In 1776, he was Brutus the Bull.

Count Vanilla Manilla - a white cub with sharp vampire teeth, glasses covering his soft brown eyes, and a black cape who is only nine years old. He also carries a briefcase with manilla folders. He was formerly known as Mac, Jr., Colonel Mac, Count Colonel Mac, Count Vanilla, and Count Macula Jackson, Jr. on separate occasions. He was turned into a vampbear by Count Macrula, a dark vampire angel. He repeats himself nine times when he uses a short phrase that he likes. He is a great listener for a nine-year-old.

Squire Blinky - a white bear who serves his cousin, Count Vanilla Manilla and even has the same eyes as Count Vanilla Manilla. He communicates mostly through blinking. He wears a blue sash to signify his squire rank.

Prince Banana- (name change dubbed by Chrissy and Chris) formerly known as Bruce Balalalalalalalalalas, Bruce Bananas, and/or Bananas, is the owner of Wild Thighs Cafe by day and a shy quiet bear at night. He communicates mostly by blinking his brownish hazel eyes and shaking and/or nodding his head. He is a brown bear erudite who is constantly seeking knowledge and can speak fluent Bear, Goat, American English, British English, French, German, Irish, Scottish, Russian, and Mandarin Chinese. He gets annoyed easily with stupidity and is generally against bureaucracies, which is why he doesn’t speak much at the Secret Society of Sexually-Frustrated Bear meetings. He is married to Princess Abigail Ice and is the son of Queen Gloria. He also is a black belt in Muy Thai fighting.

Queen Gloria - a brownish gray bear with brownish hazel eyes; speaks mostly French but can speak American English, Bear, Goat, Italian, German, British English, Irish, Scottish, and Mandarin Chinese; wife of King Skipper; mother of Francesca Asiago Cheese, Prince Banana, and Victoria Filetmignon; grandmother of Princess Seras Piealamode, Prince Derek Filetmignon, Johnnio Ice, and Kavana Ice; is the most serious and beautiful of the bears and definitely lets everyone know she is the matriarch of the family; designer of spaceship furniture and household goods; is a black belt in Muy Thai fighting; cares a lot about her appearance and looks much younger than she is; is very talkative and intelligent

King Skipper - a light orange bear with periwinkle eyes; husband of Queen Gloria; father of Queen Francesca Asiago Cheese, Prince Banana, and Queen Victoria Filetmignon; grandfather of Princess Seras Piealamode, Prince Derek Filetmignon, Johnnio Ice, and Kavana Ice; has a great sense of humor and is very talkative; is easy-going but is nothing to mess with; is a black belt of Muy Thai Fighting; speaks fluent Bear, Goat, French, American English, British English, Irish, Scottish, German, and Mandarin Chinese; inventor of weapons of mass destruction

Queen Francesca Asiago Cheese - a black bear with onyx eyes, has a similar voice to her brother, Prince Banana except that it is slightly lower, is also the sister of Queen Victoria Filetmignon, daughter of King Skipper and Queen Gloria, mother of Princess Seras Piealamode, is the Vice President of the United Emirates of Chinta and wife of Chuckee Queso; is a black belt of Muy Thai Fighting

Queen Victoria Filetmignon - a light orange bear with periwinkle eyes who looks like the female version of King Skipper, her father. She is the daughter of Queen Gloria, sister of Prince Banana and Queen Francesca Asiago Cheese, and mother of Prince Derek Filetmignon, works as the cashier at Chipotle Mexican Grill and Secretary of State of the United Emirates of Chinta on the Green Planet, has a heavy French accent, is a black belt in Muy Thai fighting

Princess Seras Piealamode - married to Prince Alexander Piealamode, is a black bear with green eyes, daughter of Queen Francesca Asiago Cheese and granddaughter of Queen Gloria and King Skipper, wears a black cape with scarlet lining, is 23 years old

Prince Alexander Piealamode - married to Princess Seras Piealamode, a white bear with blue eyes who is the father of Princess Seras Piealamode's young white cub, is very kind and good-natured, will stand up for what's right, wears a royal red cape, is 24 years old

Prince Derek Filetmignon - grandson of Queen Gloria and King Skipper, son of Victoria Filetmignon, is a young and shy golden bear who speaks rarely

Queen Megara Marie Ice – formerly known as Megara Ace, a red Russian-Irish bear who is married to King Bruce Ice and has four female cubs with him. She is a loud strong woman who always talks about putting things to good use. She has a strong Southern accent and tries to dominate her husband in the Secret Society of Sexually-Frustrated Bears. She is secretly jealous of her husband’s ability to lead, and that causes issues in their marriage. She was originally born in Chicago, IL and played for the Little League Chicago Cubs when she was a cub.

Princess Abigail Ice – formerly known as Abigail Ace, an auburn Russian-Irish female bear who is the daughter of King Bruce and Queen Megara Ice and wife of Prince Banana. She is a strong 20-year-old female cub who follows in her parents’ footsteps in wanting to lead. She asks her father to lead meetings with over 75 bears. She attends the Online University of Female Bears. She looks up to her father and has a picture of him at the front of the meeting hall of The Athenia Chapter of the Youth League of Extraordinary Young Bears.

Chancellor Martha Mae Bear – a gray senior bear who looks like a typical old female Berenstain bear. She counsels Princess Abigail Ice and is the chancellor of the Athenia Chapter of Youth League of Extraordinary Young Bears. She enjoys the spirit of young bears wanting to improve the world. She is also a conspiracy bear.

Pastor Penn - a golden bear with serious blue eyes who is a Christian newscaster, is the husband of Alexia and co-creator of the movement of Off Grid Desert Farming with Penn and Alexia, is constantly seeking the Truth and telling it to anyone who will listen, is humble and modest, does not require being called 'Pastor,' has a surprisingly wild sense of humor

[thestraggletag]

The Offering, a Bellish May Day Fic

Giftee: @applejackcat

Summary: Lochdubh is the quintessential Scottish town, which often meant nosy townspeople, a few rowdy locals and more fires than a constable could put off in a day. But it had never meant being incapacitated, stripped down and left in the forest to appease some non-existent spirit.

Yet.

AN: So sorry for the wait, giftee/Zookeeper! What started as a much simpler story devolved into something much more complicated that I had to later wrestle into a short story. I hope you like it!

Written for the @maydaymenagerie exchange of 2017.

It started with a few sheep, and later three pigs and a cow. Dead as doornails for no reason, at least none the vet could find. No signs of an animal attack, or traces of poisoning, though the animals had been burned after a thorough examination just in case. Since all the animals were from different farms and none of the farmers could find motive to believe it being intentional Hamish suspected some local was up to no good involving chemicals and the animals had died of poisoning of some sort. It was unusual for some prank or crazy scheme to have such drastic consequences but he wouldn't be too shocked either if he sooner or later found one or both McCrae's behind the whole thing.

After the animals came the rain. Though Lochdubh was no stranger to the weather phenomenon- it always seemed to either be raining or about to- no one had seen it fall in such magnitude. By the end of March, it had rained in three months the same amount as the whole of the year before, and the resulting floods had caused all manner of losses and damages. Hamish himself counted at least three leaks in the living room and two in his own bedroom, one conveniently located right above his pillow. It didn't help the situation that wee Jock was determined to jump onto every mud puddle they came across. He was considering letting all the grime and muck crust over so the little mutt would be forced to shuffle around like that.

But the physical damages were nothing compared to what the rain did to people. For some reason, he could not quite figure out every resident seemed to think raining was some sort of crime and therefore fell under his jurisdiction. It became commonplace to be stopped on the street or harassed at the pub regarding something water-related. Soon enough it was almost impossible for him to get any peace and quiet anywhere outside his house except for the library, and it was mainly because the residents of Lochdubh were convinced it was haunted. For one it was located near the woods, almost outside the town limit, and that alone was enough to scare most locals away. Like most places in Scotland the forest ripe with lore and local tall tales of nature spirits and sacred trees, guardian goddesses both unimaginably kind and terrifyingly cruel.

It didn't help either that the library had once been part of a monastery and was likely the oldest building in the village, its sad, grey stone walls covered in ivy. It looked, for all intents and purposes, like a prime haunting location, the kind spirits would fight over to inhabit. The interior was a bit disappointing, with a utilitarian use of the space, old library furniture and a modest collection of books. Not even the librarians were spooky. Mrs Aldridge, who had retired a few months ago, looked like everyone's favourite grandmother, down to the annoying habit of pinching everyone's cheeks without reason or warning (Hamish wasn't too proud to admit to having more than once crossed the street to avoid the lovable old bat). The new Librarian was even less impressive, a little mousy slip of a person, short and nondescript, most of her face hidden by big, old-fashioned glasses that made her look like an overgrown owl. Her choice of nondescript brown/beige clothing and the muddy shade of her lanky hair didn't help either.

Strangely enough even though Lochdubh was not the kind of town to get new residents all too often no one had made much of a fuss about little Miss Caill. She had moved in with very little fanfare and almost no attention whatsoever, as if people barely registered at all. Hamish himself could attest to the fact that he hadn't noticed her about the village at all, which seemed odd. Lochdubh was almost painfully small, after all. But somehow he'd managed to only have a very vague idea of her presence in town until one night, when the heavy rains had just begun, when he'd chanced upon her on the side of the road, making her way from the library to the pub, most likely. He'd almost passed her, small and insignificant as she seemed.

He'd offered her a lift, smarting a bit at seeing the shocked look on her face. He was a respectable constable, it rankled a bit that she would think a small gesture of gallantry surprising. She'd barely said a peep during the short ride, though he'd sensed her looking at him, as if trying to figure him out.

Curiously after that first incident he'd noticed her more around town, as if she'd been invisible before and now was allowing him to catch glimpses of her. He'd tip his hat at her, giving her a charming little smile and after a while she'd smile in reply, delightfully shy in a way that put a spring on his step. It was a pity no one else in town seemed to notice her much, Belle was truly one of a kind. Kind, for one, the sort of compassion that shone through the eyes, blue and warm, and unbelievable curious. She said nothing whenever he'd take refuge in the library to escape the nagging of the town, and seemed to find his passion for detective novels endearing.

After a while he got used to her rather unique appearance, finding her more charming that ugly. The overly-large clothing only accentuated how wee she was and the glasses looked rather adorable on her, highlighting her rather impressible blue eyes. The more he thought about it the more he decided it'd be wise to keep an eye on the little librarian. Soon enough others would notice her proper and come sniffing at her skirts, which could easily turn into a spot of trouble. She looked so... innocent in many ways. As if the world was new to her. Since she didn't go into town much, and feeling like he imposed on her far too much, he had taken to taking little treats with him when he visited, which they would eat in a corner of the deserted Ancient History section as if they were naughty little school children sneaking food into the library under the nose of some matronly librarian. Often during those times something about the way Belle behaved, especially when he'd thought to bring ice-cream, seemed off, almost as if she was tasting things for the first time.

Other times, however, there was something very old about her. Not in appearance, since every time he saw her she seemed to get younger rather than older, but in spirit. An old soul, TV John would say, old and powerful. He had a strange sort of reverence for the Librarian, treated her with a level of respect that seemed almost too much. Still, TV John was amongst the last sane people in Lochdubh, specially once the rumour got around that there were no animals in the forest. No one had seen a rabbit or a fox for days and some, the most outrageous ones, claimed there were no birds either.

It was then that Lachlan McCrae Jr got roaring drunk at the pub, climbed atop a table and confessed to anyone who could understand his drunken ramblings that he'd accidentally crashed his motorcycle against the old druid stone ruins in the forest. They weren't much, certainly nothing to help attract tourism. Just a small stone altar, crudely made and covered in moss and ivy. And now, according to Lachie, a pile of rubbish, as was his precious bike. It was that discovery that turned the covert, whispered conversations about the supernatural into open, heated debates, with most people convinced something magical was afoot but disagreed on the who or what. Some people ranted about druid practices, about deities and the like. Others spoke of fairies and nymphs, and those older of forest spirits, one of which inhabited the woods. The breaking of the altar, once a gift of the town to this... being, had caused it to curse the village in retribution and there would be no peace in Lochdubh till things were made right again.

 Hamish hadn't taken the town talk seriously once it turned towards the magical. He'd ignored it at first, thought it unimportant. But it didn't really surprise him much to find fireman Peter walking home in the early morning stark naked but for a small towel he clutched tightly across his hips, weird symbols painted with some sort of ashy substance on his skin. The poor sod, shaking from head to toe with cold, stuttered some excuse about it all being Lachie's idea- like Hamish needed to be told that- and scurried away. He wisely decided not to give chase, not very eager to arrest him for public indecency or have him half-naked inside his newly-washed patrol car. TV John later told him that he'd heard some boys at the pub some time before talking about old rituals, Celtic stuff they'd gotten from the internet about May Kings, virile men offered to appease forest deities. Since the smashed stone structure had broken the pact the original people of Lochdubh had made with the deity they thought another offering, of pleasing flesh, would do the trick. Hamish rather thought it a horrible idea, not even because magic didn't fucking exist, but rather because Peter wasn't exactly fighting women off with a stick. Thank God magic wasn't real or otherwise they'd be getting hail from an overly-pissed spirit rather than simply rain.

Just in case, however, he went over to the library to check things out, skimming through books of Celtic lore while he talked to Belle about old movies. She talked about films like she'd just discovered them at all and was enthusiastic about anything with Bette Davies on. He ended up renting Now Voyager just so he could talk to her about it and had to hide it from TV John, lest he imply something that wasn't. Just because he found the librarian pretty, something beautiful hidden in layers of ill-fitting clothing and comical glasses, didn't mean he was looking for something to happen between them. So he thought about her often, of course he would. He spent more and more time in the library, it was natural for her to become an important part of his life. And sure, he sometimes fantasised about her, wondering what her blue eyes would look like half-lidded and liquid, what her mouth and hair would feel like. But that just meant he was a healthy adult man with the accompanying urges.

He was sure Belle didn't see him that way anyway. She was lonely and was grateful for a friend and it was better to leave it at that. Women and him didn't mix well, at least not in the romantic sense. And there was something so... other, about her. Like she was somehow just out of his reach, like she belonged elsewhere. She was a fascinating friend, nothing more. Someone that made life a little bit more interesting, that cut through the dullness of his routine and made him look forward to things.

It didn't seem worth thinking about it at all, especially since he was too busy dealing with the rain and the town and the general madness that had taken over everyone. Too busy to think about much else or to pay attention to more mundane things. Too busy to be suspicious when Lachlan Sr left a bottle of fine Scotch on the station's doorstep, a gift for "May Day". And certainly too busy to notice the strange aftertaste of it. A few minutes later he was asleep to notice much of anything else.

 "Kidnapping a police officer is serious business, Lachie, are you even sure it's gonna work?"

"Look, a police constable has got to be a good enough offering. Seems to have taken a liking to Macbeth in any case, it's worth a shot."

The voices faded away a bit after that and for a moment there was bliss in the silence. Though it was difficult to string thoughts together Hamish tried hard to piece what had happened to him. He raised his sluggish hands to his face, sensing something pressing against it. It felt hard, a mask of some sort, covering half of his face, with horns protruding from it. Everything else felt disturbingly bare, though his skin itched around his hips. Patting the area, he found that he was wearing some sort of kilt, new and stiff, like the ones sold at the local tourist gift shop.

His head felt heavy and light at the same time and everything around him seemed to be moving, spinning in dizzying circles. Whatever they had given him had his blood boiling and his adrenaline pumping, as if preparing for a fight or some other form of exertion. Though the woods must have been freezing he felt hot all over, either from the drugs or the bonfires surrounding him. Dimly he thought of the very real possibility one of them could end up burning the whole forest down. He tried standing up but his legs wobbled and soon dropped him on his ass, and even the thick wool of the damn tourist-trap kilt didn't help soften the blow, though he barely felt it. The almost pungent smell of rosemary wasn't helping his efforts to clear his head. Rather it seemed to numb him even more, till he could barely feel the horned mask that at first had been so fucking cumbersome.

At some point, he lay back down, humming in delight at the cool softness of the moss beneath him. It wasn't that bad, really, just a spot of involuntary camping. In the morning TV John would come pick him up, hopefully bringing some of his clothes with him, and he'd proceed to meticulously and ruthlessly ruin everything the Lachies and their cronies loved. Perhaps he could convince Agnes and Barney never to serve them anything stronger than Earl Grey for a month. It'd be fun to rub their noses on a cold pint of Guinness.

"Constable?"

It was unsettling, for a brief moment, to hear a voice after so much silence. He startled, hoisting himself up and moving his head to one side and then the other, as if the stag mask didn't completely blind him to everything around him. He tensed, suddenly aware of his vulnerability. He wished above all for his uniform, not because he was half-naked in the woods but because it brought him confidence, it made him feel almost invincible, like he was nothing he couldn't do, no problem he couldn't solve.

"Who's there?"

He felt a soft, almost whispery touch down his arm and then someone was taking his hand, helping him up. He stumbled upright like a new-born colt, or a man more than in his cups.

"Shh, it's alright. It's only me."

The scent of wildflowers reached his nose, making him instantly relax.

"Belle."

His owlish little librarian had tracked him down, thank God. At last the one sane person in the crazy fucking town he called home sweet home was there to end the madness. He tightened his hold on her small, delicate hand. She was such a wee thing, small and dainty. And she smelt so good...

"Constable? Constable!"

"Call me Hamish."

He was feeling incredibly mellow, all of a sudden. Happy. Like he didn't have the weight of an entire deluded town on his shoulders. Like he was wobbling semi-starkers in the middle of the bleeding woods because he felt like it and not because he had been fucking kidnapped in the middle of the night. Like he couldn't find better use for his fingers than ghosting them along the supple flesh of the librarian's inner arms.

"You don't seem alright, Hamish. Do you need help?"

Did he? A minute ago it seemed like it but now he was feeling perfect. Belle always had that pacifying-yet-electrifying effect on him, calming him down while at the same time filling him with a strange sort of restlessness. A bit like he was itching all over, eagerness humming softly through him, low but ever-present. He traced a path from her hands to her shoulders, frowning when he didn't encounter a scrap of fabric on the way.

"Did the little pricks drag you here too? Did they fucking undress you? Because I'll fucking kill them, cut them in teeny-tiny pieces and feed them to wee Jock if they did, I swear to-"

Her hands cupped the lower half of his faced, bared by the mask, and she pressed her thumbs softly over his lips, cutting off his diatribe.

"I'm here for you. Do you want me here, Hamish?"

On the back of his mind his skillfully-honed police instincts were screaming at him, telling him in no uncertain terms that something was off. But it was hard to find in himself to care. Everything smelled so good and Belle felt so soft under his hands. She no longer shied from his touch, no longer seemed interested in keeping that last bit of distance that was always between them. There was nothing to do but to nod enthusiastically and sigh when her fingers delved into his cropped hair.

"And what do you want me to do?"

His rational side, sputtering and on its last legs, supplied a long list of things. They needed to get him some clothes, douse the fucking fire and go home. Find out what the hell those little cunts had given him. Make them pay. But above all go home, and sleep this whole night off. Instead he found himself leaning forward and, blindly, kissing her. Far from pushing him away and slapping him, the sensible response, she pulled him closer, her arms wrapping around his naked shoulders and a mouth-watering little sigh escaping her lips. She took control almost at once and he let her, more than happy to allow her to completely devour him. She was almost feral, rough and bruising and completely fucking perfect. He clung to her as tightly as he could, splaying his hands across her thinly-covered back and letting out the neediest little moans he'd ever heard.

At some point, in between the savage kissing and the undignified groping, he found himself back again on the mossy forest floor, with Belle sucking on the spot where his right shoulder met his neck. He was too far gone by that point, barely noticing when kissing turn to biting and the tips of her nails began to carve patterns into his chest and arms. The pain only added to the euphoria of the moment, turned the pleasure bittersweet and heightened it at the same time. His clever fingers dipped low to feel her upper thighs, as smooth as marble and as cold as ever. When he stumbled across the hem of what felt like a sundress or a nightgown he pulled it up impatiently, managing to wrestle it off her without much problem. He was quick to claim his reward, moving his hands to grasp her hips, dip into her waist, flutter across her tummy and finally cup her breasts, as perfect as he'd often found himself picturing them beneath layers of shapeless clothing.

Abruptly Belle released him altogether and scampered away, giggling as he protested loudly. Instead of ripping the mask off to give chase he chose to let his hearing guide him, the sport warming his already hot blood and making him grin maniacally. They laughed like little kids as he clumsily hunted around for her, his fingers grazing skin or a lock of hair before she was out of his reach again. It felt as if she was almost guiding him somewhere, like a siren weaving her spell on a hopeless sailor. And he couldn't find it in himself to care.

Finally, he managed to hook an arm around her waist and send her crashing into his chest. She felt warmer, strangely, as if she'd drunk some of the heat in his veins from his lips, as if she was absorbing it from his skin and into hers. When she captured his mouth again he gave himself to her willingly, eagerly, raking his blunt nails down her sides and grabbing her by the back of her thighs, all the encouragement she needed to wrap her legs around his torso. The added weight made him stumble forward till something- a tree most likely- broke their fall. Propping her up against it he found it easier to manoeuvre the tip of one of her breasts into his mouth. Her hiss of delight made his cock twitch in eager anticipation.

She was divine. Small and dainty but fierce and completely in control, taking from him what he was only too eager to give. Her hands did not tremble as they undid the buckles of his ridiculous kilt, nor when they grasped his erection, guiding it to the entrance of her sex.

"Do you offer yourself to me, Hamish?"

Fuck, she was talking. It took him a moment or two to try and make sense of what she'd said, at which point all he could do was nod enthusiastically, groaning in utter relief as she allowed his cock to sink into the heavenly warmth of her cunt. It felt as if a shock passed through him, something powerful and unsettling. But a moment later he was thrusting into her, his ears ringing with her mewls and delightful cries. Every one of his senses was full of her, his skin prickling all over with an awareness of her that was almost uncanny. The moment seemed to stretch for hours, as impossible as that was, and Hamish could've sworn dawn was breaking when he finally felt her flutter around his cock, bringing him finally to release.

A minute later, or several, he found himself somehow back on the clearing in the forest, the bonfires dimmed to nothing but burning coals and Belle wrapped snugly against him.

"You've pleased me well, my King. Now rest, darling, rest. It's all done now."

  "Rough night, eh, Hamish?"

Constable Macbeth was greeted by an array of jeers and catcalls. He stoically pretended not to hear any of it, making a show of talking to TV John to make it clear he was not paying attention. Barney greeted him with a pint of beer and a slap of the back.

"It's on the house, lad. You took one for the team, it's the least we could do."

Never in all his years in service had Barney given him as much as a glass of water on the house. The gesture itself left him too speechless to reply. On the booth next to him TV John whistled, impressed.

"That's a first."

Hamish could scarcely take the first sip of his glass before someone else vigorously clapped his back, making the scratches there sting like hell. One by one it seemed every man in Lochdubh was dead-set on showing him some gesture of male camaraderie and, strangely, sympathy. They brought with them snacks, cigars and other small gifts.

"It must have not been easy, but you pushed on and came through." Lachlan Sr patted his shoulder forcefully, making him bite back a howl when his hand made contact with the bite mark there. "It's all over now, lad, you did good."

He shot him one last pitiful look before ambling back to his seat to high-five his son, who flashed Hamish a thumb's up when their eyes crossed.

"Fucking barmy. What do they think, that they can butter me up and I'll pretend they didn't kidnap and drug a police officer?"

"Well, the way they see it your impressive manhood appeased the cailleach and saved the town. Quite a feat, really."

"Don't tell me you believe those sods too. The rain had to stop, it just happened to coincide with the day after my unwilling nature walk. And with the rain over of course all the little critters start to reappear, there's nothing fucking supernatural about it. And what the hell is a cailleach?"

"A hag. Vengeful spirits that can take the form of old crones, or ugly women. So, you see, the way they see it you just made a great sacrifice for this town. It certainly calls for a bit of buttering up, some well-deserved pampering at the least."

"What?!"

"Well, it was Lachie Jr that figured it out and you know his reading comprehension only gets him so far. No sense in trying to explain the nuances of Celtic folklore to him or anyone else that listened to him, the complex nature of spirits and deities. I tried, believe me, but nobody wanted to listen. It's all most complicated than that, you know?"

The door of the pub swung open and though Hamish had his back to it he could immediately tell who had walked through it. He nodded distractedly at TV John, making a vague sound to signal he was engrossed in the conversation even as his eyes and most of his attention, focused on her.

"Well, hags are complicated figures in lore. Some say kind, guardian spirits and vengeful hags are but two sides of the same coin. There are tales of deities turned into hags to wander amongst mankind, ignored and ill-treated. A test of worthiness, sometimes said to be passed by men in possession of a kind heart and a noble spirit, who'll prove worthy. This later became a very common figure in medieval literature, that of the loathly lady, made famous by Chaucer in his tale..."

"Belle."

She was dressed very differently than usual, a royal blue short dress paired with sky-high heels and not a cardigan or a coat in sight, though she appeared not to feel the cold. Her glasses were gone too and her hair shone just like he remembered it doing under the light of the bonfires in the forest. Her eyes, however, looked the same as they'd always been. Bright blue and overly curious, as if the world and everything in it was new to her.

"Hamish."

Suddenly he felt like a sodding pre-teen with his first crush, completely clueless. Thankfully the librarian seemed not to suffer from the same problem, looping her arms loosely about his neck and planting her lips firmly on his, a gentle kiss with a playful hint of tongue, that, embarrassingly, turned the tips of his ears red. Around him everyone was suddenly deadly quiet, not even the sound of clinking glass to be heard. Briefly glancing around he noticed the wide-eyed stares of everyone in the pub, including a rather delighted Esme and Flora, the town's main source of gossip (and knitted scarves). The Lachies were both gaping at him, their mouths almost comically open. Beside them Reverend Snow crossed himself, which Hamish thought was a bit much.

"Miss Caill... there's something different about you. New haircut?"

The librarian smiled, and for a second there was something faintly dangerous about her, not altogether human. A moment later it was gone. The constable blinked and took a swig of his ale, cursing himself for letting the craziness of the town get to him for a second. Gnomes and fairies and Scottish deities, what a load of rubbish.

"So kind of you to notice, John. How's that book on the Opium Wars going for you? I thought it was a fascinating read."

Soon both the older Scotsman and Belle were engrossed in a discussion. Too tired still to contribute Hamish contented himself with letting Belle lean on him, his arm around her waist and her hands toying with his shorn hair. When her fingers grazed the bite-mark she'd made he shivered, feeling heat pull on his lower stomach.

May Day hadn't turned out so bad after all.

[abnormalbox]

Choose One

I was tagged by @sleepcountmedown (Thank you lovely!! <3) 

CHOOSE ONE! Then tag 10 of your followers!

1: hugs or kisses? Hugs

2: night or day? Night

3: internet or TV? Internet

4: sweet or sour? Sour

5: red, white, or blue? Red

6: 1800s or 1900s? 1900s

7: space or the ocean? Space

8: ice-cream or frozen? Ice Cream

9: reading or writing? Writing

10: raining or sunny? Raining

11: winter or summer? Summer

12: spring or autumn/fall? Spring

13: too cold or too warm? Too Cold cause you can snuggle

14: elevators or escalators? Escalators

15: apples or oranges? Oranges

16: fire or ice? Fire

17: plane crash or car crash? I don’t like this question v.v Neither.

18: planes or boats? Planes

19: the sea or a pool? The pool 

20: singing or dancing? Singing!!!

21: long hair or short hair? Idk depends on your definition of short hair. Like my hair is pretty short rn compared to how I normally have it and I prefer it at this length... but it’s not actually that short

22: january or december? JANUARY THATS MY BIRTHDAY

23: your first child - boy or girl? idk man it stresses me out to think that far in advance

24: chocolate sauce or strawberry sauce? Chocolate sauce

25: coffee or tea? Tea

26: in your coffee/tea - sugar or no sugar? No Sugar

27: gif or jif? Jif. Sorry.

28: science or religion? Science

29: tornado or hurricane? Hurricane

30: black or white? Black

31: laptop or desktop? Laptop

32: cat or dog? Cats are cute but dogs are the embodiment of pure happiness. So dogs 

33: chicken or turkey? Turkey?

34: shower or bath? Shower

35: disneyland or universal studios? Universal Studios 

36: potatoes - mashed or baked? Mashed

37: eggs - fried, boiled, scrambled or poached? I can’t stomach eggs

38: cake or pie? Cake

39: Ben and Jerry’s or häagen-dazs? Ben and Jerry’s Cherry Garcia 

40: christmas or halloween? Halloween

41: books or magazines? Books

42: inside or outside? Outside

43: movies or tv shows? TV shows

44: McDonald’s or burger king? Neither

45: the past or the future? Future

46: superpowers - fly or read minds? Read minds all the way

47: piercings or tattoos? Tattoos

48: end of the world - zombie apocalypse or world war 3? Zombie apocalypse. 

49: Starbucks or subway? Starbucks

50: love or lust? Love

51: kitten, puppy or micropig? Puppy 

52: if you could, which would you stop - 9/11 or the holocaust? The holocaust

53: mermaids/mermen or unicorns? Unicorns. 

54: America or Britain? What kind of question is this??? 

55: dumbledore or gandalf? Gandalf

56: ninjas or pirates? Pirates

57: Firefox, safari or chrome? Firefox

58: marvel or dc? Marvel

59: pepsi or coke? Pepsi

60: circus or amusement park? Amusement park

61: eBook or physical book? Physical book

62: Greek or roman? Roman

63: Thor or Loki? Loki

64: Sam or dean winchester? Again- Why is this a question??? 

65: stefan or damon Salvatore? I vote to take these questions out. 

66: brown or white bread? I don’t eat bread lmao

67: sunrise or sunset? Sunset

68: drought or flood? Drought

69: trains or bus? Bus

70: kids or pets? Pets

71: poetry or song lyrics? Poetry

72: horror movie or chick flick? Chick Flick. 

73: play video games on - pc or console (Xbox/playstation)? PC

74: cookies or donuts? Cookies

75: saturday or sunday? Saturday

76: lord of the rings or harry potter? Lord of the Rings

77: bands or solo artists? Bands

78: art or music? Music

79: get lost in - london or paris? Paris

80: new year’s eve or christmas eve? Christmas Eve

81: museums or nature parks? This is a terrible question, they’re both great for different reasons so I can’t chose. 

82: lightning or thunder? Thunder

83: lions, tigers or bears? Tigers

84: popcorn or candy floss/cotton candy? Popcorn

85: be stuck in a room with - clowns or insects? Can I pick butterflies? 

86: soup or salad? Soup

87: asks or fanmail? Asks

88: scottish accent or irish accent? I genuinely don’t understand some of these questions. No preference? 

89: ‘friends or ‘the big bang theory’? Friends

90: ‘supernatural’ or ‘the vampire diaries’? YIKES

91: ‘the simpsons’ or ‘family guy’? The Simpsons

92: toothache or earache? Toothache

93: 'x-men’ or 'guardians of the galaxy’? Guardians of the Galaxy

94: be stranded in antarctica or sahara desert? Antarctica

95: penguins or polar bears? Polar Bears

96: 'frozen’ or 'tangled’? Tangled

97: snowmen or icebergs? Icebergs (I just love ice?)

98: hand written letter or email? Handwritten letters are so cute

99: apple or android? Apple

100: the end or the beggining? The Beginning 

I’ll tag @sarcastichormones @daughterlexas @dadinof @jurassicsuburbia @romanesque-moon @vita-savant @nica-sun @amenowarutsu @madammidna and @chainsawhime You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to lol 

[reitasderpface]

i was tagged by @diealo thank you!!!

CHOOSE ONE! Then tag 10 of your followers!

1: hugs or kisses?

Hugs

2: night or day?

Night

3: internet or tv?

Internet

4: sweet or sour?

Sweet

5: red, white or blue?

Blue

6: 1800s or 1900s?

1800s

7: space or the ocean?

Ocean

8: ice-cream or frozen yogurt?

Ice cream

9: reading or writing?

Reading

10: raining or sunny?

Raining

11: winter or summer?

Winter

12: spring or autumn/fall?

Autumn

13: too cold or too warm?

Too cold

14: elevators or escalators?

Escalators

15: apples or oranges?

Apples

16: fire or ice?

Ice

17: plane crash or car crash?

Car crash

18: planes or boats?

Planes

19: the sea or a pool?

The sea

20: singing or dancing?

Singing

21: long hair or short hair?

Long hair

22: january or december?

December

23: your first child - boy or girl?

Neither. i hate kids. if i had to choose, girl.

24: chocolate sauce or strawberry sauce?

Chocolate

25: coffee or tea?

Tea

26: in your coffee/tea - sugar or no sugar?

Sugar

27: gif or jif?

Gif

28: science or religion?

Science

29: tornado or hurricane?

Tornado

30: black or white?

Black

31: laptop or desktop?

Laptop

32: cat or dog?

Cat

33: chicken or turkey?

Neither (vegetarian)

34: shower or bath?

Shower

35: disneyland or universal studios?

Disneyland

36: potatoes - mashed or baked?

Mashed

37: eggs - fried, boiled, scrambled or poached?

Scrambled, but it has to has extra sharp cheddar cheese if I'm going to eat it.

38: cake or pie?

Cake

39: ben & jerry’s or häagen-dazs?

Ben and Jerry’s

40: christmas or halloween?

Halloween

41: books or magazines?

Books

42: inside or outside?

Inside

43: movies or tv shows?

Movies

44: McDonald’s or burger king?

never been to burger king and haven't eaten at mcdonalds since i was 5...

45: the past or the future?

The past

46: superpowers - fly or read minds?

Fly

47: piercings or tattoos?

BPiercings

48: end of the world - zombie apocalypse or world war 3?

WW3

49: starbucks or subway?

Starbucks

50: love or lust?

Love

51: kitten, puppy or micropig?

Kitten

52: if you could, which would you stop - 9/11 or the holocaust?

Holocaust

53: mermaids/mermen or unicorns?

Unicorns

54: america or britain?

America

55: dumbledore or gandalf?

Dumbledore

56: ninjas or pirates?

Pirates

57: Firefox, safari or chrome?

Chrome or safari

58: marvel or dc?

idk

59: pepsi or coke?

Both

60: circus or amusement park?

amusement park

61: ebook or physical book?

Physical book

62: greek or roman?

Roman

63: thor or loki?

Loki

64: sam or dean winchester?

idk

65: stefan or damon salvatore?

Who?

66: brown or white bread?

Brown

67: sunrise or sunset?

Sunset

68: drought or flood?

Flood

69: train or bus?

Train

70: kids or pets?

Pets

71: poetry or song lyrics?

Song lyrics

72: horror movie or chick flick?

Horror movie

73: play video games on - pc or console (xbox/playstation)?

Playstation

74: cookies or donuts?

Cookies

75: saturday or sunday?

Saturday

76: lord of the rings or harry potter?

Lord of the Rings

77: bands or solo artists?

Both

78: art or music?

Both

79: get lost in - london or paris?

Paris

80: new year’s eve or christmas eve?

Christmas eve

81: museums or nature parks?

Museum

82: lightning or thunder?

Lightning

83: lions, tigers or bears?

Tigers

84: popcorn or candy floss/cotton candy?

Cotton candy

85: be stuck in a room with - clowns or insects?

Clown

86: soup or salad?

soup

87: asks or fanmail?

bothhh

88: scottish accent or irish accent?

idk both?

89: ‘friends’ or ‘the big bang theory’?

never watched them

90: ‘supernatural’ or ‘the vampire diaries’?

never watched them

91: ‘the simpsons’ or ‘family guy’?

never watched them

92: toothache or earache?

Toothache

93: ‘x-men’ or ‘guardians of the galaxy’?

never watched them

94: be stranded in antarctica or the sahara desert?

antarctica

95: penguins or polar bears?

Penguins

96: ‘frozen’ or 'tangled’?

Tangled

97: snowmen or icebergs?

Snowmen

98: handwritten letter or email?

Handwritten

99: apple or android?

Apple

100: the end or the beginning?

End

i tag @monologueatgarnetintheeden @ribica-mb @malicemizer @innocent-bullet @akuma-no-sixthgun @thegazetto13 @filthinthefangirl @socially-awkward-user @this-beautiful-madness @ephemeral-moonglow (sorry if you’ve already done it)

[brewed-pangolin]

Dropping this quickie Soap since I can't stop thinking about the freshly showered, Butterscotch Ice Cream King.

(Please ignore the ice cream scoop that resembles a roasted turkey somehow)

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

This is the greatest thing I've ever seen! This is amazing! I wanna kiss you and hug you!

Butterscotch Ice Cream Scottish King

[just-another-nerds-little-world]

» CHOOSE ONE!

CHOOSE ONE! Then tag 10 of your followers! 

1: hugs or kisses?

hugs

 2: night or day? 

night

3: internet or tv? 

internet

4: sweet or sour? 

sour

5: red, white or blue? 

blue

6: 1800s or 1900s? 

1900s

7: space or the ocean? 

ocean

8: ice-cream or frozen yogurt? 

both are delicious, but I’ll go with frozen yogurt

9: reading or writing? 

both

10: raining or sunny? 

raining

11: winter or summer? 

winter

12: spring or autumn/fall? 

spring ♥

13: too cold or too warm? 

too cold 

14: elevators or escalators? 

escalators

15: apples or oranges? 

oranges

16: fire or ice? 

ice

17: plane crash or car crash? 

none; both are horrible

18: planes or boats? 

none xwx

19: the sea or a pool? 

pool

20: singing or dancing? 

Both are fun xDD (even though I can’t sing or dance)

21: long hair or short hair? 

long hair

22: january or december? 

both ♥

23: your first child - boy or girl? 

I’d prefer a boy

24: chocolate sauce or strawberry sauce? 

chocolate sauce

25: coffee or tea? 

Tea! ♥

26: in your coffee/tea - sugar or no sugar? 

No sugar, exception: black tea with some sugar 

27: gif or jif? 

gif!

28: science or religion? 

None. It’s hard for me to believe in one or many gods without having witnessed it myself and even though science has proven many things, there are still incidents which can’t even be explained by science.

29: tornado or hurricane? 

both can be pretty awful

30: black or white? 

both

31: laptop or desktop? 

laptop

32: cat or dog? 

both :3

33: chicken or turkey? 

Neither chicken nor turkey. I’m a vegetarian after all. ^-^

34: shower or bath? 

bath

35: disneyland or universal studios?

Universal Studios

36: potatoes - mashed or baked? 

mashed

37: eggs - fried, boiled, scrambled or poached? 

boiled and scrambled

38: cake or pie? 

cake

39: ben & jerry’s or häagen-dazs?

Häagen-Dazs

40: christmas or halloween? 

Christmas

41: books or magazines? 

both

42: inside or outside? 

inside

43: movies or tv shows? 

movies

44: mcdonald’s or burger king?

I liked to go Burger King when I was eating flesh

45: the past or the future? 

the past

46: superpowers - fly or read minds? 

fly; why should I would like to read minds, I know mostly what people think of me

47: piercings or tattoos? 

tattoos

48: end of the world - zombie apocalypse or world war 3? 

none; both are horrible

49: starbucks or subway?

Subway

50: love or lust? 

love

51: kitten, puppy or micropig? 

All of them! ♥

52: if you could, which would you stop - 9/11 or the holocaust? 

Holocaust

53: mermaids/mermen or unicorns? 

Unicorns!

54: america or britain? 

America

55: dumbledore or gandalf? 

None 

56: ninjas or pirates?

Ninjas

57: firefox, safari or chrome? 

Chrome

58: marvel or dc? 

Marvel

59: pepsi or coke? 

both are equal to me

60: circus or amusement park?

none

61: ebook or physical book? 

physical books

62: greek or roman? 

Greek

63: thor or loki? 

Thor

64: sam or dean winchester? 

no idea who these guys are

65: stefan or damon salvatore? 

same as above

66: brown or white bread? 

brown

67: sunrise or sunset? 

both 

68: drought or flood?

again none ‘cause both are horrible

69: train or bus?

train

70: kids or pets?

pets

71: poetry or song lyrics? 

song lyrics

72: horror movie or chick flick?

horror movie

73: play video games on - pc or console (xbox/playstation)? 

Consoles of course! ^o^

74: cookies or donuts?

donuts

75: saturday or sunday? 

Sunday I guess...

76: lord of the rings or harry potter? 

None ^-^

77: bands or solo artists? 

both

78: art or music? 

both

79: get lost in - london or paris? 

London

80: new year’s eve or christmas eve? 

Christmas Eve

81: museums or nature parks? 

Nature Parks

82: lightning or thunder? 

lightning

83: lions, tigers or bears? 

bears :3

84: popcorn or candy floss/cotton candy?

cotton candy

85: be stuck in a room with - clowns or insects? 

insects

86: soup or salad? 

salad

87: asks or fanmail? 

asks 

88: scottish accent or irish accent? 

I like both somehow

89: ‘friends’ or ‘the big bang theory’? 

TBBT

90: ‘supernatural’ or ‘the vampire diaries’? 

None

91: 'the simpsons’ or 'family guy’? 

None, both have this idiotic humor I don’t like

92: toothache or earache? 

both are awful

93: 'x-men’ or 'guardians of the galaxy’? 

none

94: be stranded in antarctica or the sahara desert? 

Antarctica

95: penguins or polar bears? 

both 

96: 'frozen’ or 'tangled’? 

Both are funny ^w^

97: snowmen or icebergs? 

Snowmen?

98: handwritten letter or email?

A handwritten letter has something more personal ♥

99: apple or android? 

Android

100: the end or the beginning?

the beginning

Tagged by: sweetheart @withered-rose-unbreakable-lotus, thank you (/^3^)/♥

I’m tagging: 

@music-is-a-painkiller

@sago-san

@dizzycherrytea

@makowashimai

@sigoshawk

@fancy-fandoms-crew

@jrockmama

@rovsworld

@chachatmaru

@snakedisorder

[damnedifivoodoo]

Choose one!

CHOOSE ONE! Then tag 10 of your followers!

1: hugs or kisses? hugs

2: night or day? night

3: internet or tv? internet lmao

4: sweet or sour? sour

5: red, white or blue? blue

6: 1800s or 1900s? 1900s

7: space or the ocean? neither plz (but space probs)

8: ice-cream or frozen yogurt? both, gimme bothhhh

9: reading or writing? writing

10: raining or sunny? raining

11: winter or summer? anything but summer

12: spring or autumn/fall? spring

13: too cold or too warm? too cold

14: elevators or escalators? escalators

15: apples or oranges? apples

16: fire or ice? ice

17: plane crash or car crash? car i guess

18: planes or boats? planesss fuck boats

19: the sea or a pool? pool fersher

20: singing or dancing? world needs more of both

21: long hair or short hair? long hair

22: january or december? december

23: your first child - boy or girl? plz no kids (girl tho) 

24: chocolate sauce or strawberry sauce? chocolate sauce

25: coffee or tea? tea

26: in your coffee/tea - sugar or no sugar? no sugar

27: gif or jif? gif

28: science or religion? probs science idk

29: tornado or hurricane? tornado

30: black or white? black

31: laptop or desktop? i miss my desktop

32: cat or dog? cat (unless its wrigley)

33: chicken or turkey? animal? chicken. food? neither.

34: shower or bath? bath omg i would kill for a bath tub

35: disneyland or universal studios? bitch idk 

36: potatoes - mashed or baked? masheeeeed

37: eggs - fried, boiled, scrambled or poached? scrambled if i have to eat em

38: cake or pie? theres so many variables here um um um cake

39: ben & jerry’s or häagen-dazs? neither, i like soft serve owo;

40: christmas or halloween? uhhh christmas. halloween is a joke anymore tbh

41: books or magazines? books 

42: inside or outside? outside

43: movies or tv shows? movies i guess 

44: mcdonald’s or burger king? mcdonalds

45: the past or the future? past i guess early death sounds gr8

46: superpowers - fly or read minds? fly

47: piercings or tattoos? piercings 

48: end of the world - zombie apocalypse or world war 3? zombies i guess

49: starbucks or subway? subway

50: love or lust? lust

51: kitten, puppy or micropig? kitten

52: if you could, which would you stop - 9/11 or the holocaust? probs holocaust 

53: mermaids/mermen or unicorns? merfolk probs 

54: america or britain? neither?

55: dumbledore or gandalf? dumbledore cuz idk anything bout gandalf

56: ninjas or pirates? pirates

57: firefox, safari or chrome? chrome

58: marvel or dc? marvel

59: pepsi or coke? pepsi if plain. cherry coke if flavored. 

60: circus or amusement park? amusement park

61: ebook or physical book? physical book

62: greek or roman? greek i guess

63: thor or loki? thor!

64: sam or dean winchester? uhhhh fuck idk enough to pick

65: stefan or damon salvatore? damon. im weak for those eyes 

66: brown or white bread? i just like bread in general fam

67: sunrise or sunset? sunrise b/c no mosquitoes

68: drought or flood? flood

69: train or bus? train

70: kids or pets? pets omg 

71: poetry or song lyrics? i’ma go with poetry

72: horror movie or chick flick? horror plz

73: play video games on - pc or console (xbox/playstation)? pc

74: cookies or donuts? uhhh cookies 

75: saturday or sunday? saturday

76: lord of the rings or harry potter? harry potter

77: bands or solo artists? bands bands bands!!!

78: art or music? bothhhh smush ‘em together for best effect 

79: get lost in - london or paris? paris b/c aesthetic

80: new year’s eve or christmas eve? christmas eve

81: museums or nature parks? i like both tho :c

82: lightning or thunder? thunder

83: lions, tigers or bears? burrs

84: popcorn or candy floss/cotton candy? cotton candy!

85: be stuck in a room with - clowns or insects? clowns

86: soup or salad? salad

87: asks or fanmail? asks 

88: scottish accent or irish accent? uhhhhh scottish maybe?

89: ‘friends’ or ‘the big bang theory’? friends

90: ‘supernatural’ or 'the vampire diaries’? vampire diaries is a guilty pleasure

91: 'the simpsons’ or 'family guy’? neither

92: toothache or earache? ?! neither plz (tooth i guess)

93: 'x-men’ or 'guardians of the galaxy’? not really into either

94: be stranded in antarctica or the sahara desert? antartica

95: penguins or polar bears? penguins are less murdery

96: 'frozen’ or 'tangled’? tangled

97: snowmen or icebergs? snowmen #leavetitanicalone

98: handwritten letter or email? handwritten

99: apple or andriod? currently have an iphone but i’ma go with android

100: the end or the beginning? enddddddddd

I was tagged by @the-damnedest-creature (thank you! ^^)

I’m tagging @powerofpinsol @prussianmoose @techqueen @death-metal-becomes-her @uruha-lips @nihiluru @pikkuinen @kaipuppet-of-the-skirt-fort @katnerd20 @diegusta

[techqueen]

Choose one!

CHOOSE ONE! Then tag 10 of your followers!

1: hugs or kisses? both

2: night or day? night

3: internet or tv? internet ayyyy

4: sweet or sour? sweet

5: red, white or blue? red

6: 1800s or 1900s? 1900s

7: space or the ocean? ocean???

8: ice-cream or frozen yogurt? both

9: reading or writing? writing

10: raining or sunny? raining

11: winter or summer? winter

12: spring or autumn/fall? both

13: too cold or too warm? too cold

14: elevators or escalators? escalators

15: apples or oranges? apples

16: fire or ice? fire

17: plane crash or car crash? car i guess

18: planes or boats? planes

19: the sea or a pool? pool bc fuck sand

20: singing or dancing? singing

21: long hair or short hair? shortttttttt

22: january or december? december

23: your first child - boy or girl? no fuckin kids 

24: chocolate sauce or strawberry sauce? chocolate sauce

25: coffee or tea? tea

26: in your coffee/tea - sugar or no sugar? splenda

27: gif or jif? gif

28: science or religion? science

29: tornado or hurricane? tornado

30: black or white? black

31: laptop or desktop? i want a desktop but laptop :’)

32: cat or dog? DOGE

33: chicken or turkey? chicken

34: shower or bath? both

35: disneyland or universal studios? didney

36: potatoes - mashed or baked? mashed potate

37: eggs - fried, boiled, scrambled or poached? uhhh eggs in a basket if i gotta eat them....

38: cake or pie? chocolate cake or pumpkin pie

39: ben & jerry’s or häagen-dazs? haagen-dazs

40: christmas or halloween? both

41: books or magazines? books

42: inside or outside? both?

43: movies or tv shows? movies 

44: mcdonald’s or burger king? mcdonalds

45: the past or the future? neither 

46: superpowers - fly or read minds? fly

47: piercings or tattoos? piercings

48: end of the world - zombie apocalypse or world war 3? neither plz

49: starbucks or subway? starbucks

50: love or lust? love

51: kitten, puppy or micropig? puppy

52: if you could, which would you stop - 9/11 or the holocaust? holocaust

53: mermaids/mermen or unicorns? merfolk

54: america or britain? uhh neither?

55: dumbledore or gandalf? gandalf i guess?

56: ninjas or pirates? pirates

57: firefox, safari or chrome? chrome

58: marvel or dc? marvel

59: pepsi or coke? DR.PEPPER BC PEPSI AND COKE SUCK

60: circus or amusement park? amusement park

61: ebook or physical book? physical book bc i can keep track of where im at easier

62: greek or roman? greek????

63: thor or loki? loki

64: sam or dean winchester? neither

65: stefan or damon salvatore? neither? they’re ‘meh’ 

66: brown or white bread? white bread is best but all bread is good

67: sunrise or sunset? sunset bc i can sleep in

68: drought or flood? flood

69: train or bus? train

70: kids or pets? pets

71: poetry or song lyrics? uhhh song lyrics

72: horror movie or chick flick? uhhh horror???

73: play video games on - pc or console (xbox/playstation)? pc bc i cant afford consoles, unless its handheld

74: cookies or donuts? both

75: saturday or sunday? saturday

76: lord of the rings or harry potter? both?

77: bands or solo artists? bands

78: art or music? both

79: get lost in - london or paris? either?

80: new year’s eve or christmas eve? xmas eve

81: museums or nature parks? both

82: lightning or thunder? lightening

83: lions, tigers or bears? tigers

84: popcorn or candy floss/cotton candy? neither

85: be stuck in a room with - clowns or insects? clowns

86: soup or salad? soup

87: asks or fanmail? asks

88: scottish accent or irish accent? irish?

89: ‘friends’ or ‘the big bang theory’? neither

90: ‘supernatural’ or ‘the vampire diaries’? uhh vampire diaries?? idk

91: 'the simpsons’ or 'family guy’? neither

92: toothache or earache? uhh neither but toothache i guess?

93: 'x-men’ or 'guardians of the galaxy’? guardians

94: be stranded in antarctica or the sahara desert? antartica

95: penguins or polar bears? penguins

96: 'frozen’ or 'tangled’? with how many times i had to watch frozen with the girls, tangled

97: snowmen or icebergs? snowmen

98: handwritten letter or email? email

99: apple or andriod? android

100: the end or the beginning? end

got tagged by @damnedifivoodoo

[elevenhoursinfront-blog]

February 23rd 2017

Steve’s alarm went off at 0500. Not that I heard. In fact, I didn’t even hear him get down from his bed or getting ready for work. I must’ve been dead to the world. My alarm was on for 0900 but I was woken up at 0800. The German girls got in at 0400 and their alarm went off for 13 WHOLE MINUTES before they even realised it was going off. That doesn’t sound too long but an alarm ring is roughly 3 seconds long before it repeats itself. I wanted to cry. When one of the girls turned it off, Josh shouted “FINALLY!” from his bed. That’s how bad it was. I’m glad it wasn’t just me who was annoyed with it.

I said hello to our new roommates from yesterday - I’m fairly sure they’re British but they were just leaving as I got up so there was no introduction as such. The German girls were packing up their stuff and Josh just got back from breakfast, he had to check out by 1000 also. I went down to breakfast. It felt weird going down on my own. I did leave the room singing “One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do” - Josh laughed. I only had Weetabix. I wasn’t feeling particularly hungry. I will add that their Weetabix here is pretty nasty. Good job I borrowed those sweeteners from Starbucks.

It was roughly 0930 when I finished my breakfast. I had an interview at 1100 but I still didn’t know the address. The guy was meant to text the address over to me yesterday but he didn’t. I did text for it last night but still no reply. I rang him and he answered straight away (he was really grumpy, definitely in a bad mood). I apologised straight away for bothering him again and asked for the location for the interview. He just kept on saying “Hello? Hello? HELLO?”. He could definitely hear me. He hung up on me after the third hello, so I got the hint. No interview. I went back to bed. I said goodbye to Josh although it wasn’t goodbye. He was only going across the street and hopefully he’ll be back to Mad Monkey as soon as possible. When he got to his room, he text me to say he could see our window. I went to the window and waved - he waved back. I received my first texts from Steve around 1200. He got to work at 0600 when he was meant to start at 0700. He wanted to leave earlier to make sure he found the right location but his timings were still very wrong. It was only 2 train stops and 1 bus stop until he got to the right place. A coffee shop was opening as he jumped off the bus so he sat there and had a drink. He started to look around for the construction site. He asked a few people who didn’t know where he needed to be. Eventually, someone told him to go into an office where he was working. He was told he would be finishing around 1530. An 8 hour day is good. Sometimes construction work can be for 4-5 hours only. This means for one day’s work, he will be bringing home $200. He got a half an hour break for lunch at 1200. Steve still managed to forget to fill up his bottle of water and take a fork with him. Both of which were on the list I made him. Typical Steven.

I spoke to a couple of my friends before they went to sleep. It was roughly midnight back at home. It was 1130 before I realised that I had to do something with my day. I showered and got ready. I got ready for… Nothing. I had no idea what to do. I knew I had to get a job but I was actually feeling pretty sorry for myself. I hated being on my own. Steve and I had spent every day together since January 4th. It was weird not having him around. Don’t get me wrong - I love having space from each other especially on the days I want to ring his neck, but it was just odd. The worst part was being in a new country that I didn’t know so well.

Two new roommates walked through the door. Two girls… From Canada. Jess and Steph. They’re really nice. They’ve just been travelling Southeast Asia. I’m so jealous. Steve and I want to do that so badly. They’re in Australia for one month but have only booked two nights at Mad Monkey. They may extend if they like it and if there’s space. They’re gorgeous and so petite. Complex coming…   I went to the travel agency that allows us free internet use and paid for printing. It’s 50c a sheet to print which is really expensive. I was going to find a library but the one in Kings Cross is shut so I would’ve had to pay the price in travel anyway. I printed a few of my CV’s off and put them into my folder. This actually took almost two hours. It would’ve taken a hell of a lot longer if it wasn’t for Steve’s Uncle Sean. He changed my CV into a PDF form so I can now print using the computers here. Savior Sean!

It was 1400 and I started to feel peckish. I went back to the hostel and made some lunch. The famous turkey mince and salad, of course! It was nice having lunch in the afternoon. There wasn’t many people around either which is always a bonus when it comes to the kitchen. There were two new people in the kitchen that seemed nice enough. I spoke to them whilst I cooked, both from England. The girl would not shut up though so I was secretly hoping she wasn’t put into our room. There was one empty bed left.

I went back to my room to apply for more jobs. Applying online was better and more economical… I could also do this properly now thanks to Uncle Sean and his PDF file. I had a massive headache for an unknown reason. I had drank water with my lunch and I wasn’t in the sun for more than 10 minutes. Strange. I put my hoody on and got into the covers. Not because I was tired, but because the aircon works too well. I’m not moaning, I’m just explaining…

Steve woke me up at 1630 when he got in from work. It appears, I may have fallen asleep whilst applying for jobs. Exciting stuff and all that… His first words were “Busy day?”. Sarcastic much! I was so excited to hear about his day but the first thing he did was eat his lunch. He’ll definitely remember his fork tomorrow! He received a text before he got in asking him to work again tomorrow which is brilliant. He spent the day working with 4 other labourers - 3 with the agency Steve is with. One English, one Irish, one Scottish and one from New Zealand. 3 are staying in Kings Cross also but different hostels across the road. He was based underground making a new car park (I think, I’ve probably got this wrong. He always tells me I don’t listen to him). The car park is going to be beneath shops which will be beneath flats. Today was a hot day roughly 30 degrees but underground it’s even hotter. Steve said they were all dripping wet from sweat. He was constantly bending down which meant the sweat was falling onto his glasses and he couldn’t see. He should get contacts but I don’t know whether he will be able to put them in and take them out. Something to try when we get home I guess. He had to mix cement and put the cement onto the wall with his hands… Weird right? He didn’t understand either but just got on with it. He was using Cango which is a Jackhammer to break up the concrete. General bits and bobs too like sweeping up and filling the skips with rubbish. He said it was good and he wasn’t really moaning which is a first. A good first day if you ask me. He jumped into the shower and got changed.

I was really jealous that Steve was working. I love to work. I love to be busy and have things to do. I felt like a spare part today. I knew Steve would find work first doing construction but I also thought I might’ve had friends by now, too. Steve fancied chocolate and asked if we could go to the shops… This was only going to end one way - an argument. And it did. It was my fault to be honest but I only mean well. Steve got a basket and filled it up with two massive bars of Dairy Milk, Ice Cream and Jelly Babies. I asked him to put the Ice Cream and one chocolate bar back. We had no freezer for the ice cream and he had to have his dinner first so there was no point. It would just melt. Steve began to sulk like a 3 year old down the isle. Literally, even his feet and bottom lip were going! I’m trying ever so hard to eat healthy and to get Steve to eat healthy but he has no will power. It’s difficult for me to stay on track when he’s eating like that. His metabolism is very different to mine. Dairy Milk is stupidly expensive here so that was another reason I asked him to put it back. He only wanted one chocolate bar and it turned into a basket full of snacks. Steve spends his life with champagne taste with cider money. He got his own way of course because he is an adult and he can do what he likes. He will be the first to come running to me when his bank balance is 50c and he has put on another stone! I’m only trying to look out for him.

I had dinner on my own - not because of the “argument”, but because Steve had ice cream for dinner. That’s all he wanted. I made pesto pasta with salad. I was feeling pretty low. Homesick most likely. I made Steve bolognese to take to work for lunch and put it in the fridge. I came upstairs and chilled out for a little while. I spoke to Steph and Johnny about their days whilst Steve was flicking through his phone. Just to add, Steve didn’t even manage his Dairy Milk bars or Jelly Babies… He is famous for the ‘eyes bigger than your belly’ situation. I ended the night in tears. A lot of tears in fact. And it appears I’m crying again whilst typing this… Bugger. This is where my Dad would call me a tart. I think I’m a little home sick. It didn’t help being on my own for the whole day and knowing I have to do the same again tomorrow. I’m not even able to speak to friends or family during the day when I am alone because it’s the middle of the night. Stupid time difference. Anyway, I need to man up. I’m just tired and it doesn’t help that I’m not losing any weight either. This really affects me, a lot more than it should do.

Tomorrow is another day though, another page in the book, another blog. I plan on waking up (without a 13 minute alarm), handing out my CV’s and going to the gym. We’ll see what happens.