#i've sketched out so many ideas of her with the skull you have no idea

[cowboyskeletons]

flower language rocks. i should do more art with it

[kozachenko]

Zanmu 100% has a very large bone collection. She seems like the type. I can perfectly imagine an interaction with someone, probably Eiki, (idk why but it fits) and she says (for some reason), "You must have a lot of skeletons in your closet" and Zanmu responds with, "Oh, how did you know about my bone collection?" and Eiki just stares for a few seconds and then says, "your what now?" and Zanmu responds by opening up a closet and low and behold, she has a bunch of them. Some human, some not. As Eiki stares in shock, horror, and confusion, Zanmu just starts rambling on about all the facts about bones she knows, where and how she finds them, and even starts sorting them into different piles as she speaks, "Of course, I organize them by species, age, condition, cause of death, and more specific categories," and when Eiki asks how many she has, Zanmu just says, "I kind of lost track after I reached 100" and poor Eiki faints.

{Artists Note}:

So I had a really neat pose idea for Zanmu and I had to draw it. I'm glad that I finally drew her again, because last time I did she looked waaaaaay too tense so this drawing serves to rectify that. Man was the actual process for the first bit of this rough, like, especially the eyes. So last time I drew Zanmu, I gave her some really nice eyeshadow, and I forgot about how big of a difference eyeshadow makes to how the eyes look, so I went through several different variations of them. Also, I'm glad that the expression turned out nicely, it's a nice break from the deadface I've been stuck with for a while now lol. Her one arm that isn't holding the skull kinda gave me some hardship because I had no idea how to show that it was resting on the rock, as the idea for the rest of the piece came to me waaaay after I did the sketch, so hey, just a thing to improve for next time. I played around with some collage elements for the trees, their foliage literally has a paper texture on it. I went for a more simplistic approach to the lighting, letting the colours more or less speak for themselves. The background also gave me a hard time, as I was getting stuck with how to make her pop out from it, and I think I found a good solution using overlay layers.

Clothes and fabrics are now my favourite things to render, it's just so satisfying to do. I also love adding that textured layer overtop of everything, it just makes everything come together y'know?

Also, another headcanon I have for her is that she's taller than Hisami, and Hisami is really tall so that means that Zanmu would be able to tower over literally everyone lol.

[mxrstar]

[ID: the images are two collages/concept art pieces.

the first one has a composite picture of a solar eclipse in the background. you can see the darkened sun, and then the light coming out behind it. the sun is framed by a winding black column that moves snake-like from one side of the frame to the other. the top of the page is painted in blue, grey and black, and the strokes are meant to represent the sea. a stylised lighthouse comes out from the sea upside-down and its light physically floods one side of the painting with a blue-grey ray. the bottom of the piece is also painted in blue, grey and black, but the strokes look more like clouds. in the middle of the sun, a piece of paper says: "callum". above of the collage, on the white corners of the paper, it says: "I think the lighthouse misses you, too", and below the collage: "there are plenty of ghosts who love you".

the second collage has a series of old television on the top half. the televisions are carved out so that through them you can see a hot air balloon shaped like an eye, a blue spiral, the background of a sketched prison, and the name "tim". the bottom part, on a purple-blue-brown background, has a series of darkened pieces of paper glued onto it and is covered in white dots that look like spilt ink. one of them say "shall I be gone for long?" and then right below it "shall I be gone?" "for long", one other goes: "remembrance will be always" but the "always" is almost unreadable and covered by paint. there is a big one that is messily covered in "brother friend son" over and over again. one other says: "death is only by a horizon". at the centre of the piece, there is a written line that says: "you know why you did what you did. you know you would it again." /end ID] 

@titanfalling2 wrote a long, beautiful fic whose main character is a kid I've never thought twice about in canon and now I would die for him. they also wrote an interlude about Tim that is set in the same AU, and I've been quite literally thinking about it non-stop for two days. so, this is what I've done about it. those words really do deserve the time spent making art off of them

under the cut, explanation for Artistic Choices:tm: and some close ups

Callum first:

i'm a big fan of the fact that the background is an actual sun eclipse cause yeah! that's exactly it! just, the idea of darkness literally getting in the way and obscuring a source of light. it's very much part of what callum's story line is about. that realisation that he has So Much potential because (1) he is a kid, and (2) he is a good, caring kid, and he deserves to be put in a situation where he can finally shine and be free

the semi-recognizable lighthouse is there to represent his grandma, sure, but it's also just. the idea of someone guiding you being inaccessible to you sometimes. of having to look up to see it, and figure out where it's pointing. because you aren't used to it, and because there are things that physically get in the way. it stands to reason that the lighthouse and the sea should fall, but they don't, because they exist in a careful balance that by the end isn't yet broken. they are capable of showing callum the light, eventually, because the light has always been there, yes, but also because callum is given enough tools to move freely through his own space

the quote pretty much exemplifies that concept, i think. i also do like the "there's plenty of ghosts who love you" cause the painting kinda looks haunted, but it's okay because there are ghosts who love you

Tim, including close-ups:

the tvs are a way of representing just the concept of Witnessing and they all show something horrific, in one way or another. there's the prison background (i think that's taken from one of piranesi's prisons illustrations- i say i think because i cut the picture from an old school book and lost the inscriptions but i am about 95% sure), then the spiral, which actually had the face of a man lost in it but I went over it with paint because the loss of identity made it more literally spiral to me. there's also the hot air balloon, which is just perfect, because it's basically a skull carried by an eye. talk about witnessing. and then simply "Tim", the signature

i chose "you know why you did what you did. you know why you would do it again" as a quote to put there cause the whole thing is about acceptance. so, it's a reclamation of the mess and the hurt, because you know you would it again. it's the focus through which i was trying to visually depict the fic. it is what it is and it is pretty shitty, but it's mine and i chose it cause it was worth it

this is pretty much a mess but i wanted to sort of just. represent the chaos of it, even in the finality? on a personal level for Tim, all of this means many things. and the white spilled ink is a way to. i don't know, signify that lack of agency in trying to make sense of what's been written, but also total control over the choices he did make (though that's more about the quote above i already talked about)

the "remembrance will be always" is surrounded by that Cloud, sort of, cause Sasha is a dark big spot in Tim's life. her death defined a lot of things and almost burned some bridges. it also has the most white on it cause like, it's one of those places he will want to come back to without ever achieving much because he simply does not remember her

the jon quote is kinder, i think. still complex, but kinder

then there's "brother friend son" which hurts still because of the history there, but it's open

the last "death is only a horizon" is clearer if darker cause it's- a choice but also a part of Tim that is partially defined by his powers

so yeah. that's most of it! i love doing this stuff! too tired to write a conclusion hope the explanation was nice to read <3 i love these fics and ren if you are reading this I'm bowing and throwing you flowers