#i've no idea how the toilet started running nor what's causing it

[safyresky]

it was indeed the simple fix but my dad

well. he can be a little chaotic at times

and this was one of those times

it was coffee o'clock and he was at the sink to fill the percolator when it happened

so we do that whole. thing

and we're standing there looking the empty wet cupboard

my dad's on he's knees staring at it

i say "cool so what do we need to get. what do we do to fix this"

he looks at me with this stare he does

i'm gonna do my best to describe it

he kinda inhales. and stares up at you, squinting a bit

you can tell he's thinking and 9/10 times this is his "chaos is going to happen" kind of face

he does a slow blink

then he says "well, i'm going to make a cup of coffee on the one cup, since it's far too late now to use the percolator, and i am going to sit and enjoy my coffee"

but dad. the pipe

we'll take care of it after i have my coffee

so is it the simple fix, i ask?

could be simple, could be three days, he says, getting up with a shrug

and plugging in the keurig

remember when those were all the rage?

SURE ENOUGH. HE MAKES HIS COFFEE

MAKES MY MOM'S COFFEE

SITS DOWN AND STARTS GOING THROUGH HIS COIN COLLECTION

AND THE KITCHEN, NEED I REMIND YOU, IS STILL COVERED IN SOPPING WET TOWELS

THE CUPBOARD OPEN AND DRYING

AND MY DAD'S SITTING DOWN DOING HIS COINS

so you can IMAGINE the confusion on my brother's face

who has been in his room with viddy games this whole time

when he walks downstairs, turns into the kitchen to get himself a percolated cup of coffee

only to walk into THAT

"hey dad where's the coffee"

"pipe burst, so we used the one cup"

"huh. okay"

I'm sitting on the couch like.

why the fuck is everyone so chill about this

they are NEVER chill

ANYWAY

while the cups were brewing he asked me to turn the water to the house back on

since. you know.

he has the shut off valve by the sink FOR the sink

"hindsight's 2020," i say to my Dad as I go down to turn the water back on

WHICH, BTW, WAS AN ORDEAL BC FOR SOME REASON THE TAP THAT TURNS THE WATER ON

TO THE WHOLE ENTIRE HOUSE

SPINS AND SPINS AND SPINS

and then the toilet upstairs starts running

which it had been doing for a while

but then one day just fixed itself ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

well. when you shut the water to the house off

and turn it back on

this particular toilet seems to take it as a reset

and remember it had been running

so it's running and running

BUT GOOD NEWS GUYS

THE TOILET WAS REPLACED LIKE 10 YEARS AGO

IT HAS IT'S OWN SHUT OFF VALVE

so we shut it off and continue with coffee o'clock

Sometimes when I come home for a holiday, it's absolutely RANK vibes and SUCKS and I'm ready to yeet myself into the car and head back home. Other times it's heavily chaotic. This weekend is 100% the latter:

i got in Saturday afternoon

went up to my childhood bedroom

smelt like weed

why weed

YO SIBLINGS, SOMEONE DOING WEED IN MY ROOM?

My Dad pipes up cheerily.

NO IT'S JUST SKUNKS :)

I'm sorry...what?

Oh! We have skunks living under the back deck :)

(my room faces the backyard)

We have. what now?

My Mom pipes up: oh yeah it's BAD. one night we had all the windows open and they sprayed and we almost DIED

okay, cool

so I get in get settled some time passes

My Dad's tidying the kitchen when suddenly there's a deep thunk and he YELLS

SHUT OFF THE WATER TO THE HOUSE!!

man runs like his ass is on fire downstairs to shut off the water

my sister books it upstairs

I go into the kitchen to ask where the shut off valve is

THE KITCHEN CUPBOARD UNDER THE SINK IS A WATERFALL, I SHIT YOU NOT

A PIPE BURST?!?!?!?

I run up to gather towels with my sister, we do our best to cover the floor as the cupboard fills with water and it starts to seep out through the cracks

dad is downstairs shutting the valve, is yelling upstairs FLUSH THE TOILETS, WE NEED TO RELIEVE THE WATER PRESSURE

finally the flow stops, my dad comes upstairs, we open the cupboard

FWOOOSH as a small pond comes out onto the towels

Dad looks at the towel mess

looks at the sink

looks at my sister and i

"that was great response time" he says

"i know, right?" my sister says

"i had a shut off valve up here" he continues

"you had a what now??" i ask

"A shut off valve up here under the sink"

he's been adding valves when we replace water related things

the sink was replaced 4 years ago

we could've had less of a flood

"Well. fight or flight," i say with a shrug

"WHAT'S GOING ON WHAT'S HAPPENING" my mom asks from the living room

PIPE BURST my dad says

"Okay, do I need to go to the hardware store?" i ask

"eh," says my dad, "it could be a 3 minute fix, could be a 3 day fix"

THREE DAY? I exclaim

"yeah, you gotta make it sound good," he says, dragging everything out of the cupboard

i have been home for about an hour and a half at this point