#i've never really tagged anything but gotta be honest...

[ugliestfawn]

💭

[codacheetah]

5 for the isat ask game!

5 - What's your favorite optional event?

VERY TOUGH ONE TO ANSWER. I'm gonna go right ahead and disqualify twohats bc it's a predictable answer. If I had to choose just one though I think it'd probably be the sus event. It really got my goat on my first playthrough bc I didn't realize you had to do it in ACT 4. If I remember correctly I think sus is the only optional event locked to ACT 4??? Now that I've actually done it though I'm quite fond of it.

Sus event is one that you really have to go out of your way to do. It kind of reminds me of the True Ending in SASASAP but More and I'm sure that's intentional. Like the requirements for sus quest necessitate that you're going to do it, if not the loop before ACT 5, very soon before it. You have to know pretty much everything about Time Craft and Wish Craft already, so whatever you're doing in the loops now is basically taking out any optional stuff before you hit the end. You have to pretty thoroughly remember how the script goes just so you know all the best ways to break it. I feel like if the True Ending route is Loop going through the motions so many times that they can't deal with holding their facade together any longer, the sus route is Siffrin waving a big red flag around for help. There's just no way you're going to stumble into sus without preplanning what to do to rack up your points and make Odile aware of how Wish Craft works.

So I think it's interesting how much Siffrin pushes back against Odile trying to figure him out. It's a pattern of behavior that I am well aware of where you're desperately going "HELP ME" but you're not willing to accept it when it's offered to you.

Siffrin spends an entire loop screwing everything up, to a point that's frankly kind of egregious even by Late Stage Timeloopers standards, and then they can't reckon with the consequences of it. I don't think sus event is as intentional of a cry for help for Siffrin as it is the player, mind you. But I do think it's. Very tragic. Yeah of course "it's too late" in the sense that Siffrin's about to talk to Euphie and the whole journey will end, but moreso it's that by the time that Odile can piece together all the information necessary to figure Siffrin out, Siffrin is just far too deeply entrenched in his self hatred and fear of abandonment to be dug out. I think if Odile could somehow figure it out in, like, early ACT 3, or if Isabeau was just a bit more pushy in getting Siffrin to do a feelings talk, maybe they'd actually be able to reach Siffrin a little. But they're always just a little too late, every single time.

I think the fact that you start really getting a bunch of weird points in ACT 3 gives this event a lot of buildup. For potential dozens of loops you'll see Odile brush against the truth of the situation, and then just barely miss. By the time she figures it out, it's too late. Explodes

Expounded upon slightly more in tags bc I don't like typing in post bodies I feel like a fish on land. eek

[gor3-hound]

are you lonely?

ft. leon kennedy x fem!reader

cw: 18+ content, incest, dad leon, 18+ reader(obviously), p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, dubcon??(just to be safe), a lot of self-loathing and guilt on leon's part

a/n: i apologise wholeheartedly if i tagged anything incorrectly, this is my first time ever posting something i've written(and one of my first times finishing an idea), but i will try my hardest. THIS IS DARK CONTENT, so please be careful reading and scroll if you don't like it!! also genuinely please tell me if i missed any tags! hope you like it :)

word count: 2.4k words

It never gets easier. Every single mission manages to drain Leon more than the last. He almost just gave up on it all a long time ago - he would have if it wasn't for one thing.

You.

As he opens the door from another exhausting mission, he's hit with the smell of home cooked food that has his mouth watering. The house is spotless, as always. Floors completely polished, the sound of music coming from the kitchen has him dragging his feet there on autopilot, eyes settling on you.

His sweet daughter is at the stove, stirring something in a pot. You haven't even noticed he's home yet, humming along to the music coming from your phone softly as you cook. He leans against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest, just gazing at you for a few moments.

God, he missed you.

“Hey, honey.” He hums, the corner of his mouth twitching in a close approximation of a smile, about all he can manage after the shit he's seen this past week. Your movements pause, and then you're tilting your head over your shoulder to look at him.

“Dad! You're home!” You exclaim, shooting him a smile that lights up your whole face. He barely has time to react before your arms are wrapped around his torso, giving him a tight hug. He never feels like he deserves your affection. He's barely even around, but you're always clinging to him like a needy puppy when he is. 

“Mhm. Managed to finish up a little early.” He mumbles, a hand coming to your head to press it against his chest, giving your waist a little squeeze with his other one. Doesn't bother telling you about what he was doing. Doesn't want you worrying. “You miss me?”

“Course I did.” You reply without hesitation, giving him a squeeze in return before pulling away from him. “Gotta keep cooking before it burns, though. You hungry?” You ask softly, returning to the stove.

He hums softly, eyes lingering on you as he walks away. He finds himself looking at you for a little too long, blinking his eyes to snap himself out of it. “Yeah, I could eat.”

His gaze finds you again before long. His eyes flick over your form, hovering on your curves for a moment before he frowns. Jesus. Since when did he look at his daughter like that? Since when did his daughter look like that? Must of been a while, but he's only really noticing it now

He's only been gone for a week, but it feels like a lifetime. You're always so happy to see him, always acting so domestic. You cook for him, clean for him and cuddle up to him after he's had a particularly tough day.

You'd make a good wife for someone one day.

His frown deepens as his brain supplies that thought to him. Is this what's happening to him now? He's so sick that he's attracted to his own damn daughter? Is that really how fucked up his life has got? 

He gets a little weird after that, eating dinner with you in silence when it's done before rushing off to the bedroom. You ask him about 100 times what's wrong, but he always gives you the same ‘it's nothing, honey, just tired.’ You don't believe a word of it, naturally. You know your dad better than that, know when something’s bothering him

And you're a sweet girl. Too sweet for him, if he's being honest. So he shouldn't be surprised when you go to check on him after you clean up the dishes before you go to bed. But he wasn't thinking right, and you walk in on him right as he's pumping his dick to the thought of you.

“Shit…” He breathes out as he sees you in the doorway. He thinks he's going to be sick when the sight of your surprised face is what tips him over the edge, your pretty lips parted in shock as he cums harder than he has in years.

Post-nut clarity hits him like a train, guilt clawing its way up his chest, nausea setting in. “Fuck, baby. I'm so sorry.” He says quickly, too stunned to move. His hand is still gripping his cock, still hard and leaking, his hand coated in his release.

And you're just staring, unable to take your eyes away. Makes your stomach flip and your heart beat faster. You open your mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. He quickly seems to snap out of his daze and yanks the cover over himself, his jaw tightening as he refuses to meet your eyes.

You find yourself disappointed that you can't see him like that anymore, a frown tugging at your face. “It's okay, dad.” You manage to say, voice a little strained. Heat pools in your stomach, and you fidget a little as you stand in the doorway, your common sense warring with what you wanted.

“I just wanted to check on you.” You say after a moment of silence, Leon still not looking at you. “You seemed… weird at dinner. Wanted to make sure you were okay.”

You continue to stand awkwardly in the doorway before you shift further into the room. Against your better judgement, you sit on the edge of his bed, trying to catch his eye.

“It's okay, dad. Really.” You tell him, reaching a hand out to touch his cheek. He lets out a stifled groan, his eyes squeezing shut. You're too good for him. “My fault for not knocking.”

His eyes crack open to meet yours, and he slowly realises he's found you beautiful for a long time - more than what's considered acceptable as a father. Ever since you came back from college during one of your breaks, filling out your clothes in a way you never had before, looking up at him with those pretty eyes…

Fuck. He's sick. He deserves to rot in hell. He'd noticed long ago, pushed the thoughts away so he could be the father you deserved. And you're perfect. So goddamn beautiful, like you were made for him. Your hand is so warm and soft where it cups his cheek, your touch so gentle.

He's been so, so lonely. And you're the prettiest thing he's ever seen, brows furrowed in concern as he refuses to answer you. Knows if he opens his mouth, he's gonna say some shit he regrets.

He ends up doing something he's gonna regret, anyway. Can't help himself when you're giving him those eyes. He's grabbing you by the cheeks, pulling you into a kiss without even thinking about it.

You pull away, and he whimpers. He tugs you back in again, kissing you with more fervour this time. Your body freezes up, then you find yourself kissing back, and he's not sure if that's worse or not. Guilt is eating him alive, but he can't help himself.

“I'm so sorry, baby.” He murmurs between kisses, desperately tugging you closer to him. His tongue slips into your mouth, and he moans softly as your own prods against his. “Can't help it. You're so pretty.”

This time, you're the one deepening the kiss. His hands find your waist, his grip tightening. He didn't realise how badly he needed this. Needed you. He can feel how badly you want him, the way you're pressing up against him as he kisses you.

It's so wrong. He wants to do so many things to you. You want him in a way no one has ever wanted him before, even more than your mom ever did. It's intoxicating, makes him dizzy. He feels so pathetic. What kind of sicko wants to fuck his own daughter? He's your dad. He should be protecting you from creeps like this, not making a move on you.

“Baby…” He breathes out, pulling away from your mouth, his heart hammering in his chest at the disappointed look that spreads across your face. “We can't do this. Y'know that, yeah?”

But his hands move to settle on your hips, tugging you into his lap, the duvet the only thing separating you from sitting on his bare cock that he never had a chance to shiver back into his pants after you caught him. He's not strong enough, needs you to be the one to bring him to his senses. You just needed to say no, and he'd be able to stop. But you don't, and he's too weak to do it himself. Far too weak.

“Daddy…” You breathe out, frown tugging at your lips. “Please? Just this once?”

How is he meant to say no to that? He buries the guilt, buries the self-loathing. He's good at that - pushing away his feelings and pretending that everything's okay. He can't deny his pretty girl of anything, especially not when she asks so sweetly.

So he kisses you again. It's a messy, sloppy kiss, one that has him groaning and rocking his hips up to get some kind of friction on his aching cock. It twitches, already leaking pre-cum. He can't even remember the last time he fucked someone. Can't believe he's about to fuck you. He's tempted to cut his dick off after this. Doesn't deserve it.

It's not long before his hands are pawing desperately at your pants, tugging them off along with your panties. He keeps your shirt on, pretends that makes him better, even if he wants to see how your tits bounce. Hey, he thinks, at least I had some self-control.

You moan so prettily when his thumb brushes your clit, rubbing slow circles into it. You're already so wet, his cock jumping with interest. Even Hell is too good for him.

Your hands slip down to tug at the fabric separating the two of you, your hips only hovering long enough to pull the duvet down and expose him, a low whine spilling from your lips.

“Want it, daddy. Please?” You murmur, dipping your head down to kiss his neck, making him suppress a groan.

“Yeah, baby. Anything you want.” He breathes out, his free hand reaching for the base to make his cock stand tall, offering it up like some kind of treat while his other hand still rubs lazy circles onto your clit.

You both moan in sync as you lower yourself onto his length. His hand slips to your hip, gripping it to guide your movements. His hips buck up into you, his tip brushing your cervix whenever you sink down fully onto him.

You're so wet, and you squeeze him just right. He's going to go insane. There's no way he can help himself now. He's never gonna stop thinking about how good you feel wrapped around him.

“Fuck, honey. Pussy's made just for me,” he groans, cringing as he says the words. He's never been a fan of dirty talk, feels awkward. Worse when he thinks about who he's fucking. But you feel so good, he really can't stop himself. His brain isn't working anymore.

“You're so big.” You whine, grinding your hips down against him more than actually riding him, like you don't want his dick to leave you for even a moment. Cute. He almost cums just at the way your face twists as he fucks up into you.

“S’all yours, baby. C'mon,” he coos, thumb slipping away from your clit and making you whimper, just so he can grab your waist with both hands. “Ride daddy.”

He lifts you up and down, helping you ride him. You rock your hips desperately, moaning as he presses up against your sweet spot with every thrust, picking up the pace as he fucks into you. He's able to manhandle you so easily, which only has you moaning louder, your eyes fluttering shut.

With his hands occupied with gripping your waist as he helps you fuck yourself on his dick, you bring your own hand down to rub at your clit, making the heat in your stomach build rapidly.

The bed creaks as he picks up the pace again, rutting deeper into you than before, your pussy making the most obscene squelching noises. It's downright sinful, Leon has to use all of his focus to stop himself from cumming right then and there. Fuck, if it wasn't for him jerking off right before you came in, he'd have cum as soon as he saw your pretty pussy.

You're close, biting your lip to sniffle your moans as they grow louder, fingers moving faster against your clit. Your dad notices, shifting his hips until he's pounding relentlessly into your sweet spot, making you see stars.

He feels his chest swell with pride when he feels you tense up, pussy clenching around his cock deliciously as your orgasm hits, juices gushing past his cock and coating his balls. He didn't even know he still had it in him, thought his dick game died in his 20s. This was a pleasant surprise.

His balls tighten, and he knows he's about to cum. He grunts and goes to pull you off of him, but you whine and shake your head, pushing yourself down. “S'okay, daddy. I'm on birth control. Wanna feel it, please.”

He frowns a little at that. He doesn't like thinking about other guys fucking you. You're his princess, a sweet girl. Your daddy will take care of you, not these other losers. God, he's fucked up.

“Yeah, baby? Want daddy to fill you up?” He grunts, flipping you over with ease so your back's pressed to the bed, him hovering over you. He pounds into you with renewed vigor, head hanging and bangs covering his eyes.

“Fuck.” He hisses as he buries himself balls deep in you, cock kicking inside your pussy as he cums. He pants a little as he fills you, he's not quite as young as he used to be. Takes it out of him sometimes.

He pulls out and slumps next to you. You cuddle up to him instantly, and that guilt and shame comes to the surface again. He pulls you close to him, pets your hair and kisses your forehead like he always does.

“Love you, baby girl.” He murmurs, his free hand pulling the covers up and over your body, his fingertips scratching your scalp lightly.

“I love you more, dad.”

[karamazovposting]

I've briefly talked about it before (it's somewhere in my bipolar Ivan Karamazov agenda tag) but I genuinely love how Ivan's situation is treated through the story and I really relate to it because it's so realistic and well done.

I mean, Ivan himself openly and casually admits that yeah I might kill myself in less than ten years but it's not a big deal or anything mid conversation with his brother who he hasn't seen in almost a decade like it's a completely normal thing to say and think about (because to him it is) and the narrator is like oh Ivan sees dead people sometimes but it's alright and everyone else is just cool with it.

Yes, Ivan is struggling with his mental health, but it's not treated as an epic descent into madness for the drama or for shock value or a Jekyll and Hyde or extreme situation out of ignorance or, worse, mockery. He's just a mentally ill young man being treated like a person who needs help (I wish the people around me had been as concerned and caring as Alyosha and Katya were, to be honest) and even if it's a story written and set in the 19th century, no one's ever disrespectful towards him: no demeaning language (for the time period), no mockery, everyone takes him seriously and it's even highlighted that he's still capable of rationality (his defining character trait; he has not lost himself!); even after the whole trial fiasco, no one's angry at him, they just acknowledge that he's unwell. There is something particularly delicate about how his character is handled, a particular kind of sensitivity and softness paired with a lack of exaggeration and spectacularization that really positively surprised me when I first read the book because I wasn't expecting Ivan's condition to be an accurate portrayal of what I have been through and live with every day.

Even when Ivan is distressed by it, the story never gets too dramatic with that and it never drags it on for too long and that's what I love about his talk with the devil and the trial: it's all very neutral in the most respectful way possible given the context. I don't really know how to explain this, but (at this point everyone and their mother knows) I have bipolar disorder and that's exactly what living with it (or any mental health condition I guess) is like: it's casual, it's normal, it's not a big deal; that's just your life and you gotta live it. There is a lot of nuance that I didn't think I would find so accurately portrayed in a novel from almost two-hundred years ago.

Ivan is more or less neutral towards and comfortable in his own chaos because what else can he do, really?

[dnalt-d2]

(TW for racism/xenophobia, as well as what's going on with Cellbit right now. For anyone who wants to know about that, I put the documents he put out in the replies for the post, as well as TWs for what it contains)

You know, I gotta say I'm really glad I'm hardly on twitter and BARELY know how to navigate it. Because I never actually SEE any of the drama going on over there, I just hear it from tumblr people coming here from over there, and that's definitely the case here as well as well

And I know I haven't really talked much about QSMP Drama before, but what's going on right now is hitting me a little harder than I would've thought, so I do wanna give my two cents on it

For starters, I read through the entire document that Cellbit put out and I feel absolutely horrible for what he's going through right now, and for what he went through in the past. Especially since I've been through something similar to one of the things he mentioned. Not to mention the fact that I'm also most likely asexual as well. (This is kinda why I wanted to talk about it at all, if I'm being honest) I really hope things get better for him, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart

And as for the apparently rampant xenophobia that's been targeted towards the Brazilian community, I honestly feel absolutely terrible that this has been happening. And I really hope that people can come here and find a better part of the community to interact with, if they choose to stay at all. Which I can certainly understand anyone choosing to leave, however unfortunate that is. Either way, I'm really sorry this has been happening to you guys, and it never should have happened in the first place (And anyone else who's experienced this, you have my sympathy as well, even if I know it isn't really gonna help much)

For anyone that stays, I'm really sorry things have been so shitty. Obviously there's not gonna be any place that's completely safe and tolerant, but I certainly hope things over here are better than on twitter

QSMP has been an amazing experience for me, and the fact that I've learned so much about so many different cultures has been absolutely incredible. I'm not the kind of person who can just learn this kind of stuff by reading up on it, so this has really been a great way to learn about things that I either never thought to look into, or just wasn't able to understand for whatever reason

Anyone that sees this sort of project, which has been connecting so many different communities and cultures, and decides to still be so intolerant and hateful, are just a special kind of awful. And frankly, they're the ones losing out on something incredible

(Btw I'm not sure what all to tag this as, since again, I don't really talk about drama stuff all that often, so if anyone wants me to tag a specific trigger or anything else, please let me know)

[watchyourbuck]

♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧ Seven Sentence Sunday!

tagged by @jesuisici33 @daffi-990 @diazsdimples @wikiangela @fortheloveofbuddie @lover-of-mine @wildlife4life @steadfastsaturnsrings @hippolotamus @thewolvesof1998 @theotherbuckley @evanbegins thank you my loves! go check their works!! 🤍

well a few days ago I started thinking about a new wip, and today I come show you the first snippet. I would usually keep it hidden bc I like suspense but not this time. It’s gonna be 10 letters written by Eddie, sent to Maddie. Each chapter will be a new letter. Kinda tw: Buck’s dead. This is the only thing Eddie and Maddie have to keep the memory of him alive.

────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

"Dear Maddie,

I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to you. After burying the funeral, I felt like I was going to die. I... still kinda do. Everywhere I look, I see him. I guess I don't have to explain it to you. You probably see him, too. He was never just mine. He was ours.

I don't have words of comfort. Chris is in pieces, and frankly, so am I. Somedays I wake up and I absentmindedly reach over to his side. I've had to curl bu back up into my side and cover myself up. The bead is wearing out unevenly.

It's getting harder to carry on. It probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I deleted everyone's number. I don't think I'm strong enough to ever see any of them again. Any of you, really.

I love you, Maddie, I'm sorry.

I should ask how you are, but I think that'd be stupid. Last I heard, Chim had to get you commited against your will. I don't know where you are, but I hope these letters reach you anyway. I think it's the last I have of him, and it's the last I can give of me.

You kindly asked me to tell you how we fell in love. I gotta be honest, Maddie, I didn't couldn't yet, but now... there's a part of me that believes I'll forget if I don't write it down. Kinda like everything else is wasting away.

So, I will. I'm gonna tell you our story. I will be as delicate as I can, because he never deserved anything but gentleness. I only hope I was able to love him the way the universe intended me to love him. I can't fathom thinking that loving him from this far will ever amount to what I could've done had we had our whole lives.

I was too late."

────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

tagging @spagheddiediaz @honestlydarkprincess @jeeyuns @eddiebabygirldiaz @malewifediaz @buckleyobsessed @smilingbuckley @eddie---diaz @princessfbi @eowon @honestlyeddie @monsterrae1 @bucksbirthmark @transbuck @exhuastedpigeon @cal-daisies-and-briars @nmcggg @disasterbuckdiaz @your-catfish-friend @giddyupbuck @try-set-me-on-fire @firemedicdiaz let me know if you wish to be removed from this particular tag💗

[cringefail-hermitry]

I've been wanting to make a post like this for a while now, and well, having just finished a crucial stage of my life, I think this is a good a time as any.

It's gonna be a long one

Like, *LONG* long

Like, I Am Going To Mention Every Single One Of My Mutuals By Name long (if you'd rather not be tagged in the future, do warn me)

First of all, the primary purpose of this post is as a letter of thanks for the wonderful months you Tumblr peeps have provided me this year. I am not hesitant to say joining the hellsite was the single best decision I have made in the last 12 months, heck, I think about 2/3rds of the friends I mantain regular contact with nowadays came from here. But this wouldn't be a long post if it was just a brief "thanks y'all for improving my life". I'm gonna get into detail. And I'm gonna be sappy about it. You can't stop me. You're not my mother. And not even my mother could stop me from posting this.

I would've said "I thought long and hard about who I'd start with", if there was any question about it. There isn't. @tearychildren, where do I even fucking begin. I can't really say anything too specific because if I begin I don't think I'll stop and half this post is gonna be about you, and this is already a very long post, so I'm just going to leave it at this, you already know well enough just how much you matter to me.

Going onwards, another of the early spots goes to who I believe was my first mutual, definitely one of the first people I followed, @chlorohexidine, a long-time mutual and recent good friend, our daily chats, however short, never cease to be highlights of my days, your art is really cute (love me some rounded shapes) and brainstorming ideas for your TTRPG campaigns is always fun (I really like your worldbuilding, too). It's only fair to mention your (and my, just needed to make this segue well) good friend @xsenpi, infodumping touhou to you both genuinely got me through that month, and Undertale 2: Revenge of The Robots with Rei and TC has been a blast so far.

@soundsofastar is another that warrants special mention for actually changing my brain chemistry and making me appreciate the local wildlife even more than usual (if we ever meet in person, WE ARE GOING ON A NICE LONG WALK TO LOOK AT BIRDS TOGETHER, WHEREVER IT IS WE ARE WHEN THAT HAPPENS, MARK MY WORDS). Your art also makes me feel things. Not many things make me feel stuff a lot. That is impressive. I should be in a good spot to finish reading the Illuminae Files within the next few days, so please do pester me about it, otherwise the piece of media that the next person I'll talk about recommended to me will consume all the time I'd read it in.

So, the next person I'll talk about, @northwest-cryptid, thanks for letting me use our DMs as my Mabinotepad, and for getting me into Mabinogi in the first place, you've been both the direct and the indirect cause of many good times, and I gotta be honest I kinda admire you a lil' bit (and if you know anything about how I talk, I am horrible at expressing vulnerability, admiration and these sorts of emotions without a bunch of euphemisms unless I'm doing this sort of tangent where I attempt to talk about myself in a more depersonalized way, so what that sentence there essentially means is "I admire you a lot and you are an inspiration").

Another pivotal figure in how this year shaped out is @ratlesshonret, creator of The Bird Nest, site of many good times, who has exposed me and many others to some wonderful media (I AM GOING TO FINISH POCKET MIRROR SOMETIME, MARK MY WORDS), reading through all the chats in the server is usually a blast, too. Your contributions to my life cannot be understated. Seriously, thanks.

The next great friend I'll mention is @transgender-lea-crosscode, we've started talking more only recently, but have already bonded a fair bit, I reckon, damn you're good at Blazblue. You've dared to make me good at the game and for that, I commend you. You should say words about Zeroranger in my general direction sometime, I'd be happy to hear/read them.

Now for those mutuals that I don't really speak to, but are responsible for like, 75% of my total notes, like, everyone is more than welcome to jump into my DMs and start talking about anything whenever, but y'all specifically are folk I'd have started talking with regularly ages ago if I knew what to talk about. @hoshinoreika2004, @ward-leon, @edenplumreal, @tabnk2, @tapok-eve , @boofbv and @sorcerousbrick, thanks for all the lil' dopamine hits.

Shoutouts to @wretchedbirdthing for being normal about that bird, you're a blast to see on my dash and I wish you luck snapping those collarbones in twain to hear those gay little squawks.

@freiflies and @ottisbuns, alongside Tapok, Vic and Honret, y'all bring life into The Bird Nest, and although I haven't really shown up much there recently, I still read most of everything, the words are cool, keep up the good work!

@genericgirl420 and @mikusays-transrights, you two are the mutuals that suffer the least with The Distances, so let's do this in a more, well, local fashion. É genuinamente bom ver que a comunidade brasileira do tumblr está ativa e saudável, aumenta minhas esperanças de encontrar outras criaturinhas desse site maligno pelas ruas, sua presença, por si só, já melhora meus ânimos, por isso, agradeço profundamente.

Ok back to speaking in simplified Old German. This next section goes out to @lemocoffe and @teacup-of-doom, both of whom I haven't really interacted much, but what little there was was quite great, this is, in fact, an invite to do more of the interact-y thing. Y'all are cool.

Another shoutout to a frequent view on my dash, @lobotomise-me-please, whose "Boobs Girl Music" post still has 10k notes to me, I'll get back to mass reblogging it someday (if y'all wanna help, check out @boobsgirlmusic for the post, that's my Boobs Girl Music sideblog where I reblog Boobs Girl Music)

@aurora-veil, @limbuscompanyyuri and @thevanishedpeople-intothenight are up next, some of my first mutuals, y'all post good. And have been doing so consistently. For the past like, 9 months or so. That's impressive.

@meltingadoration, @holyitsquiverrflynn and @jestressofnihil, my more recent moots, there hasn't been much time to do the friendship-building and knowing each other thing, but all that means is that there's still many opportunities for that, which is cool.

Last but not least, the mutuals who I haven't quite gotten to know as well, but I'm inviting to chat anytime, @readysetgargoyle, @atlasmothss, @meeresengel, @flesh-borne, @b-kut, @aureatecenotaph, @risingdragonblade, @agender-witchery (your posts helped me immensely in figuring out gender, thanks for that) and @lich-of-lcorp. Y'all are cool, we should talk more.

And one last section for all those who I've been in touch with but aren't mutuals with, for any and all reasons (I do tend to reblog very, well, erratically), y'all deserve to be on this list, but I just didn't wanna bother you too much (I do have words of thanks to say though, if you want them, just ask).

This post is still too short to express how thankful I am for y'all existing. I don't think text could ever do it justice.

[moshieee]

Hello! Sorry to bother you, but I'd just like to see if you have a ref sheet for your sona? I'm thinking of making you, Rabid, Dia, and Bun a little animatic. Actually, if I'm gonna be honest, there are a whole lot of ideas for you four in my head rn. Especially when Rabid and Dia posted something about the song "Anything you can do, I can do better." Sorry, I'm rambling. Also, since I think at least Rabid showed something about a mob au for their sona, I've had an idea for more animatics. But anyways, sorry for this ask being really long. Thank you for at least reading this, You make me actually remember to eat, drink, and take my meds when you remind your mutuals, so thx! Also, love your art, very very unique and all I think about when I see your doodles or pieces is ". . . . . smol"

Okie, I'll be taking my leave! Gotta shape-shift back into a rat to go to the vents and continue my endless cycle of ideas and au's. Okay, Bye Bye!!!!!

(Remember to take care of yourself, drink, eat, sleep, [take meds if you need/are prescribed them], and know that you are loved!)

And- *is literally being dragged out bye an Anon* oh! Oki Nighty Night *disappears behind a door and a laundry shoot is heared opening and something is heard being but in* (muffled) Thank you, WEEEEEEEEE-

I thought a little ending that I hope made you laugh would help :]

(I was giggling the whole way though the story, a lovely ending!! Bravo 👏 🌹!!! thank you for the kind words about my style it's something I was insecure about for a long time, and I'm glad I have a positive effect on people's health hehe)

dont ever apologize for asking something, I love getting asks and long asks just means I add the tag #long post

Also oh my goodness that sounds amazing and I would be honored

as for a reference I uhhh I've been trying to make a reference but I keep getting distracted

the only best references I have I have right now is this hair guide I made for Bunsowo that I kept forgetting to share It's a bit out dated now but still close enough

And the l eyes guide I made for Rabid that is now also outdated...

If you just need an image to go off id recommended this one sense it's the most recent

Jeeze I really need to make a reference for my sona. I guess I never expected people to try and draw my stuff so I'm not used to this...

wait what's this?

Those are my lines silly/j

I wish you luck in your creations and make sure to pace yourself so you don't get hurt

Also wait nighty night? Are you supposed to be sleeping? 👁️ 👁️

[castleofclouds]

ᴛᴏ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏʏꜱ ɪ'ᴠᴇ ᴅᴀᴛᴇᴅ ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ.

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅ Nct Dream Alternative Universe OT7.

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅ pairings ; ot7 × reader (yn)

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅ disclaimer ; fiction, cursing, 18+ content, kms joke and many more.

Story are by © castleofclouds, do not copy or repost without watermark!

‧₊˚ ﹏𓊝﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖‧₊˚ ⊹ ࣪ ﹏𓊝﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖‧₊˚ ࣪﹏𓊝﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪sumarry : your life was peaceful until your stupid friends start giving you ideas of making thread about ur exes, stirring a whole new problems for you, suddenly one by one of your past start running back to you and opening old books of you and them, how do you act in this situation?

genre : gotta be fluff! texts (sometimes smau) angsty, slowburn, romance, humor, mention of 18+ content.

tag : @bluedbliss, @luvandletter, @1daily2lele7,

To All The Boys I've Loved Before ; Picture Frame

You knew Chenle is your new neighbor, you knew he gonna texts you soon or later, but you didn't expect him to text you this soon, especially after your encounters with him.

You take a sigh, memories of him still fresh in your minds, like it never leaves.

Tomorrow is gonna be a hard day, you mumbled as lie on your bed yangyang watches you and scoot closer. “What's happening?” he asked worrying about you, karina and winter heard and get closer, you hugged them suddenly.

They jolt in suprise but didn't let go and let you hold them, as they patted your back and head, you feel content on their act of care, the four of you decided to have a sleepover at your and Karina apartment, and of course you glad they do that.

You hugged Karina as you fell deep into your world of Dreamland, imagining today was just another bad day of yours that you wish you can throw to the back of your mind.

The next morning you woke up, founding everybody already went and had classes, a note on your desk already explained everything, you smiled and get ready, your class started at 10, so you still had plenty of time before going to class.

A knock on the door caught you by suprise, you ran to see who's at the door, Chenle standing there with his arms behind his back, and a smile on his face, you smiled awkwardly.

It's still feel weird seeing the guy that you used to share a bedroom, kitchen basically a house with standing in front of you as a new strangers that you just acquainted with. Well not entirely.

“The landlord said I should try to socialize with the neighbors, so I kinda bring you this?” he gave you a jar full of cookies, which were weird. The landlord never really give a shit about his renters, how can Chenle talk to him? “Thanks, I appreciate the kindness Chenle.” you take the cookies from his hands, he stand there awkwardly.

“Do you need anything else?” you asked, he looked around your unit, “You lived alone?” he asked again curious in which answers with shaking your head.

“No, I lived with Karina but she spend most of her times on colleges or at her parents house, kinda alone but not too lonely to be honest.”

“That's basically means alone.” he corrected you, you rolled your eyes, “Then what if it's true I lived alone?” you spat, he laughed clearly enjoying your sassy attitude. “Nothing, just saying If you ever feel alone I'm 2 steps away from your door!” he winked before walking back to his unit like nothing happened, you wanted to scream.

What's with your exes and their obsession of messing with you? You didn't know yourself.

You quickly change into your favorite outfit and called it for the day, you walked passed Chenle unit, it seems he is still busy with moving so many boxes and papers on his front doors, you even saw a list of groceries and some old picture frame, you leaned closer to be suprised by Chenle stand behind you as he poke your shoulder. O, oh. You are caught!

He smiled, seeing his smile make you wanted to just kiss him here and there, you did a great job handling your thoughts though.

“Oh, it seems like someone is still as nosy as she used to.” he chirped, a little to joyous you think.

“I'm just trying to walked past here but there's so many stuff in front of your door, I can't walk!” you tried to cover your act with being angry, he looks at you intensely, genuinely enjoying caught you still being curious about him.

You take the picture frame and showed you the picture, it was a picture, of him and.. A dog? Since when he had a dog, until you heard a bark from inside his house, “Wanna come inside?” he gesture to his door, you contemplating if you should come inside your Ex house or not, it's not like you can't it's just you think it's awkward, but the idea of a cute dog waiting for you at the other side of the door messing with your idea of wrong and right.

You followed him anyway, to found a cute little dog with the softest white fur, and beautiful eyes you get on your knees clearly whipped for the little dog. He smiles at your mannerisms.

“Meet Daegal, she is my baby girl for a while now.” he introduces you to the cute dog, you smiled putting your fingers in front of the little white fur face, she licked your fingers as a sign of welcoming, you awwed.

You followed chenle to inside of his apartment, so many medal and award cup all scattered around his house, so many posters of Stephen Curry all over his walls, you saw a picture of Daegal, his friends, even picture of him and yangyang.

Yes. Yangyang and Chenle were best friends, well not really were, they still are but you knew yangyang never showed it to you because he doesn't want to make things complicated, not like you mind, but you appreciate his kind gesture.

Until you found a picture of him grinning while playing a basketball, he look really cool in that pictures, you remember that pictures vividly.

That's when you first met him, when yangyang first introduced both of you, your favorite counter of all of the counter you had with anybody.

He still have that? After all this time?

“You still had that pictures?” you pointed at the picture, he looked at your direction, and nodded.

“I love that picture it reminds me of old memories.” he smiled, the same smile he always gave you every time he wins a basketball match, he would run to you with the brightest laugh he could give and hug you in the middle of the field.

“Yeah, good memories..” you wondered to yourself, Chenle looked at you, you look back, you want to averted you eyes but you can't, his eyes as if trapping you inside, making sure you can't run away again, making sure he didn't let you go this time as he used to do.

Sound of notification from your phone take you back to reality, disturbed both of you from the long eye contact, “Oh sorry about that.” as you checked your phone to found your friend asked about your whereabouts.

You don't know how to respond, or how to tell Chenle that he just got himself another visitor, he titled his head in confusion, “Why? What are they saying?” he asks looking at you with his twinkling eyes, you want to squish his head.

“My friends said they are leaving the class because they wanted to see your dog.” You admitted, he looks at you and slowly blinking before laughter echoed from his mouth.

“Your friends? They actually left the class just for that?” he wiped the years from his eyes, you nodded, “They whipped for cute dogs you know.” you respond, he agreed he knew yangyang love cuddly things he knew some of your friends love cute stuff so he already guessed it, but you quickly shake your hands, “But don't worry, I'll make sure to not disturb you!” as you bid goodbyes, you can see Chenle smile turn upside down, he really didn't want you to leave if he could he would love to let you just stay with him watching and playing with daegal but he can't do anything about it, he isn't your boyfriend anymore.

“That fast? You can always stay for 5 to 10 minutes more..” he tried to reasoned with you, but you shake your head as a no.

“Nope. This class is important so I'm going now, thanks and bye! And daegal too!” you bid before you run out from his house, you knew if you stayed much longer there's going to be some sort of love in the air and that ain't good for you, you already promised this year gonna be a peaceful and bitchless year, you can't make exception for one person even though you really miss him.

You dialed your friends and tell them you already walk to college, they answered with lots of dissapointed emojis, and crying stickers well not today kids, no visiting cute dog for today.

Previous, Masterlist, Next.

A/N

Not gonna lie, you can clearly see I kinda have a BIG SOFT SPOT for Chenle, cant blame me, he is soo cutee i want to just kiss him all over his face if I could🥺 every time he laughed I'M COMBUST, don't know why he kinds reminds me of confetti and fireworks so cute and so beautiful huhu gosh I miss him please SM make him had his own content please please, I'M BEGGING. btw do any of yall remember the cover of Sorry, Heart by Daegal that was funny as hell but she is so cute 😭

[floralcrematorium]

OKAY WOW THERE WAS A VERY BIG POSITIVE RESPONSE TO THE TELEPHONE GAME, HI

FOLLOW THE TELEPHONE GAME BLOG! @hws-telephone

I thought about making a discord, but to be entirely honest, I really don't want to manage that. In hindsight it might be good for discussions and feedback's sake, but my moderator days are behind me (I used to be a discord and in-game mod for a Minecraft server and I think I would rather eat my hand than do that again.) We will. See.

PLEASE READ MY FOLLOWING THOUGHTS ABOUT THE EVENT! I would love to hear feedback, but I think this kind of event may have to be a trial and error sort of situation. I've never hosted an event before and this is one that will move semi-fast. I will also need to be holding decent communication with people!

• Skill level does not matter. Anyone is allowed to participate regardless of their skill level or materials of choice, so long as those who work traditionally are able to get clear/well lit photos of their submission

• I will need to hold an experimental round capped at 5-7 participants. I do not know how long I should give people to complete their part. Life gets in the way and I know not everyone is fast (I am very much not fast). However, considering there will be a large number of participants, we gotta get moving! I think as of right now, everyone would have 3-5 days to complete their parts, and if they need an extension they get 2 days. If we need more time, that's possible! THE FIRST SIX PEOPLE TO FILL OUT THE GOOGLE FORMS (linked further in the post) WILL BE CONTACTED TO PARTICIPATE IN THE EXPERIMENTAL ROUND.

• Once we get into it, there could be a short-format and long-format group? Short format being people only get 1-3 days to work while long-format gets a week? The different groups differ based on complexity? Unsure. Need community feedback on this. OR we could just have two separate groups co-running so people don't have to wait forever to play.

• GOOGLE FORMS SUBMISSION HERE FOR PARTICIPANTS

• Once I have The Participants, their usernames will be ordered randomly and that'll be the order the drawing is passed around.

• If this is an event with multiple rounds... Maybe each round has a different theme? I know I have different groups of people following me (off the top of my head, FrUK, FACE fam, and Nordic centric blogs in particular). I think the first round will just be using my design for Nyo!Austria because I'm interested to see if we use a character whose clothing isn't able to be referenced by a quick google search, how that will be affected by the telephone. Unsure.

• I will start the experimental round and the very first Big Round. Other people can volunteer to be the starting artist in the future!

• No posting your submission until the end of the round!!! This is very important. The point of a telephone is you only know what the person right before you did!

• When it comes to someone's turn, I will be reaching out via Tumblr DM (or through another contact method if that is preferred). I'm considering asking someone to co-host this event with me for organization's sake, but I don't. Really have someone to do that. So!

If there's anything else we need to talk about, throw it in the replies!!! This is really going to be a trial and error kinda event until we get it down! Ideally, this would be a fun year round project/event!

BELOW THE CUT IS JUST ME TAGGING EVERYONE WHO REPLIED TO/REBLOGGED THE ORIGINAL POST

Hi, you replied to/reblogged the interest check so you get Priority News that there is a telephone game sideblog to follow @hws-telephone and that if you're still interested there is a submissions post pinned to the blog.

THE FIRST SIX RESPONSES WILL BE CONTACTED FOR THE EXPERIMENTAL ROUND.

@doodlin-moons @hws-lceland @ironic-orange @vikingosten @soulsembers @yaqamole @dappy-dappernette @losnordiquitos @tema-makes-art-sometimes @dandelion-coffee-bear @spiritmoon23 @genpaele @astrophilic-soul @batataaurdoodh @the-heaminator @krazys-ass-emporium @sixcatsinajacket @hoasens @wackylittlegal @starsilversword @untitled-kitsune @2p-nyotalia

[alligatorjesie]

Hey that's alright you can block me as much as you like but it wont change anything man. You said some shit things so I'm going to say some shit things to you.

You know what that's fine we can just repost that whole comment so people can see what a shitass you are @blessyouhawkeye

Hey real quick you do realize that reylo is just a really vanilla ass enemies-to-lovers ship if you have a problem with it well good luck man this shit is literally everywhere in media.

Almost like it's a popular trope. Have you never watched a rom com? Woof. I got some news for you brosph.

but you know what since we're on the tangent of 'weird people' in fandoms let's talk about that for a moment.

You wanna know what's weird? There's a lot of finnreys in the reblogs acting positively feral about their ship not being canon

(which idk I watched TRoS that was pretty open ended if your still mad about reylo by the end of that movie that shits on you)

and upset they don't have book deals like the reylos but IDK man maybe the reason finnreys ain't got book deals is because they spend all their time online bitching about how their ship got shafted instead of writing that fucking fanfiction.

You know when the reylos got shafted with the shit show that was EP9 instead of spending the next 3 years complaining they just trucked along in their own fucking sandbox completing their own fucking projects for their own fucking friends.

Fuck Disney we'll make our own reylo with blackjack and hookers and sex scenes.

You mean to tell us you've had more problems with reylos who were just excited to see the story concepts they predicted from The Force Awakens coming true in The Last Jedi and making positive content to reflect that joy compared to the actual nazis on YouTube who flood the platforms with 3 hour long hate videos over how Bree Larson is somehow personally responsible for their dicks falling off?

You remember that one time ethan van sciver said he wanted to kill Chinese people? He's a really popular star wars/comic book YouTuber and he's way more problematic than anyone I've ever met in the reylo fandom.

And guess what he also hates reylo what a shock!

You wanna talk about some unhinged weird behavior allow me to direct you at a rabid finnrey who has told me graphically to kill myself at least 5 times now for the sin of enjoying the wrong part of star wars according to them.

That shits fucking unhinged

Here's some of those death threats these are 100% real by the way:

Obviously Death Threat Warning some of these are quite gnarly.

This user still has an active account.

I've reported them several times but I sometimes feel like the only thing that will get you banned on this hellsite is being trans I swear to fucking god.

This user has spent over 7 years shit posting hate directly into the reylo fandom's tag instead of doing literally anything else to make their own fandom more enjoyable for themselves.

That's weird shit.

What has been hellish is being in this fandom for over 9 years and dealing with the amount of uncalled for vitriol at this very fucking plain flavor baby's first enemies-to-lovers ship.

I only started keeping track of the death threats back in September 2022

It's not even been a full 2 years and I'm nearing 1000.

This is the header for my Tumblr. This is a real number by the way I have every death threat I've gotten since starting this documented on my computer.

It's actually 955 because thepettycunt here just sent me a new death threat so now I gotta update the banner.

fun!

One day I'll make a master post.

Today is not that day.

But let's be very honest here the real number of death threats I've personally gotten are well into multiple thousands across multiple platforms over 9 years.

Just for enjoying reylo.

And I'm a furry and have been since the 90s. I'm use to being told to kill myself from strangers on the internet so color me confused when I join this really basic bitch of a fandom ship only to find the hate towards it somehow fucking worse.

That's some fucking weird unhinged shit.

I know you made this shit post just to be a shit poster so don't take this too personally I'm sure at this point you already think I'm unhinged and rightfully so

maybe I am

but after the 100th death threat I just stopped giving a fuck so you'll just have to forgive me but it's real buck ass wild to be called 'weird' when I've never sent death threats to people over fictional ships and none of my reylo friends have done that shit either but I am almost 99% sure if you look though the history of any single person who reblogged this post bitching about reylo you'll find they have a history of doing that shit.

You can pick any one. Odds are they have anti reylo posts going years back and at worst some of them have straight up told people in this fandom to kill themselves.

I can look through YOUR history OP and see You're a huge pile of shit towards reylos!

Go on pick one out at random and have a go. It's a fun horrible way to spend a afternoon.

And before anyone brings it up because people who hate reylo always do;

'what about that one time reylos harassed John Boye-'

a group of women telling John Boyega the things he's saying are sexist towards his female coworker who had already been harassed off social media a few years prior and asking him to do better isn't the harassment you think it is.

You can find that 'reaction' video John made to the reylos on google and watch it yourself. No one is being racist but they are all asking him to stop making sex jokes on his female coworkers behalf and expressing disappointment in him. In fact he even had to reused quite a few of the quotes because I think about halfway through making the video he realized he just didn't have that much material and the things people were saying were pretty fucking mild.

And I'm not sorry. Asking a adult man to hold himself accountable for the shit he says is not on the same level as the far fucking worse shit the over arching star wars fandom has done well before reylo was even a twinkle in anyone's eye

Lastly one more thing and I'm done I swear and I'm going to apologize in advance because I'm gonna sound really spicy and I guess I kinda am but not in a mean way more in a really fucking confused way

but what the fuck do you mean jenny nicholsons reylo videos are unhinged?

They're the fucking same as the rest of her videos.

Is there something less unhinged about a nearly 4 hour long video about a failed fantasy RPG theme park over a 1 hour long video about how star wars episode 9 was absolute dogshit?

Jenny makes cringe videos about cringe shit. That's her brand.

She's voiced her enjoyment of reylo very early on... I think back in The Force Awakens days? So why are you surprised she would talk about the subject at length in detail? She bought a stuffed porg larger than herself and documented collecting it on video for her channel.

Yeah man she probably likes reylo.

Most people who like TLJ do.

What... what the fuck do you mean her reylo videos specific are unhinged?

I'm sorry but if known racist and sexist YouTuber doomcock can spend 6 hours complaining about TLJ because Rey don't make his dick hard like Luke Skywalker does and he's going to make his refusal to reflect on that issue our fucking problem I don't think Jenny is unhinged for complaining about the inarguably bad movie that was the rise of skywalker for less time than the movie's total runtime.

I'm not even mad I'm just really confused by your statement.

[misc-obeyme]

Ooo human AU? Seems interesting… what is Barb doing in this human au? Y’know once upon a time I went to this little tea shop thing, do you think Barb would wanna work there? I don’t really know lmao-

I really really wanna like Mammon and I get that he’s a little tsun but it’s just kinda hard for me to like him- I need validation and knowing that the work that I put into a relationship is appreciated, and I feel like with Mammon I would feel insecure or like… does he think I’m annoying, does he just not care about that I wanna be friends? So yea-

I have a deep love for Solomon akdjdjs especially in NB?? I value emotional stability and just like. stability and domesticity in general in my relationships, and they fed us so well with that hehe :3

My sister keeps sending me angst </3 so I’m depressed now yay! But I like torturing myself lol (especially if it’s good angst)

I’ve been trying to learn some k-pop dances!! And. uh. I have never danced before (besides just like random flailing that has no choreo at all) so that’s fun! But hey, it’s not going too bad in my opinion!

Anyways sorry for bothering you with my rambling ^w^

- <3

Ahh, yes I have a few posts about my human!au ideas... they even inspired some amazing fanart! But I haven't gotten to Barb yet... I started with the brothers and I haven't finished them yet. And it was just random ideas, I haven't actually written anything out. You can find them under the tag #misc human au! But also here are some links: this is the first one about Beel, then Belphie & Satan, and lastly Asmo & Mammon.

HOWEVER I have been thinking about Barbatos because of course I have. I've actually thought about two different human!au situations for him. In relation to my general AU as linked above, I'm kinda back and forthing about what I think he'd be doing. This is because I'm not sure what Diavolo is doing in that AU and I think that would impact what Barb is doing. I don't really want him to just be Diavolo's butler but human style, you know? So I'm still ruminating on this one.

But aside from that, I've had an idea about human!AU tea shop Barbatos for ages! So yes, exactly what you're suggesting. I was thinking it would be interesting to explore a story where Barbatos is not in command of time and space, where he's just... a regular person. How would that change his dynamic with MC? What would that look like if they fell in love? How would Barbatos react in a situation where he doesn't have any obligations to a prince or magic or the world at large? He's just a man who runs a tea shop.

Because I think if he didn't have all those things and he was just a human, he would definitely run a tea shop. I like to think of it as a tea shop/bakery hybrid. And of course MC is a regular customer. It's a story I've been thinking about for a while... maybe I should write it lol.

ANYWAY I didn't mean to ramble about this, but as you can see I have many thoughts lol.

It's totally valid not to like Mammon. He has a lot of fans, but he's not for everyone! The trick with him, I think, is to remember that no matter what he says, he's definitely down bad for you. All you gotta do is flirt with him and you'll see - he'll blush like crazy. Or maybe you flirt with one of his brothers just to see him protest. But in the end, if you really need him to be honest with you, all you have to do is ask him when he's alone with you. Every time he's open and honest with MC about his feelings it's when they're alone. It's one of my favorite things about him, personally. I like to imagine MC just being really honest with him and asking him how he feels and when he tells them, he might still be blushing, but he's serious and he means it.

I also think the tsundere thing is more about before he's in a relationship with MC. He has a harder time with it until it's official and he's feeling more secure. Then I think he'd get real clingy real fast and you'd find him glued to your hip lol.

But that's just how I interpret his character! And it's okay not to like a character that a lot of other people do! That's just how it goes sometimes!

Ah, Solomon. I love him, too. I wonder what it'd be like if they gave all the characters this treatment - like, if each character lived alone with MC for a season it'd almost be like routes, you know? Because you'd get to have that domestic situation with each one of them separately.

That would be interesting, but you know it's never gonna happen lol.

I have to be in the right mood for angst... I think it's pretty obvious that I tend to lean toward fluff. I do like angst, though, especially when it's all wrapped up in complicated emotion relationships... ugh but it also makes me crazy lol!

Ohhh fun! K-pop dances are so fun to watch! I hope you're enjoying learning them! I don't think you need any prior dancing experience! Especially if you're just doing it for fun. Anyway you gotta start somewhere, right?

No worries, you are not bothering me. As you can see, I am something of a rambler myself so don't be sorry!

[broodybuck]

Shameful Dreams | Series Part 5

Series Summary: Steve and Bucky are each respectfully married to their wives, as any man should be in 1941. And yet, that doesn't stop Steve from having very shameful dreams about his married friend. Unexpectedly, things begin to happen outside of Steve's fantasies.

Series Tags: Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes | Rated E | Tags: 18+ explicit smut, no powers au, pre-serum Steve, top Bucky, bottom Steve, secret relationship, internalized homophobia, consensual infidelity, closeted characters

[Masterpost] // [ao3 link]

[PART 1] [PART 2] [PART 3] [PART 4]

Author's Note // To be honest, I don't have this story mapped out. I'm just updating as I feel like it, mainly thanks to the people who asked for more!

Monday night feels like every other. They're meeting back at the outhouse since Peggy is home. They spent the whole weekend apart. It's crazy how fast Steve walks to the docks now.

When he gets to the dip in the grass he sees Bucky standing there and at first, he doesn't notice anything different. In fact, he smiles wickedly and speeds up even more. But when he reaches him, Bucky doesn't move. His expression is knitted tightly.

"Wha—" Steve begins when his brain finally catches up. The outhouse is gone. There's nothing but tall grass surrounding a rectangular patch pressed into the ground from where the structure used to be.

"Holy shit, where'd it go?" Steve questions.

Bucky laughs darkly. He shakes his head, throws his hands up and it's then Steve realizes how mad he looks.

"Who would do this?" Bucky grits.

"Hey," Steve tries but Bucky cuts him off.

"I can't fucking believe this. No one was even using the damn thing. What good is it gone? Christ, this city always gotta be cleaning shit up! Whoever did this—"

"Hey, hey!" Steve grabs his forearms, stilling him.

A second later, they split apart even though they hadn't seen a single soul around.

"Look, we're just horny. Let's just figure out somewhere else to go," Steve stresses under his breath.

"There's nowhere else, Steve!"

Steve shushes him frantically then runs a nervous hand through his hair.

"There's gotta be," Steve says. "Lemme think."

Their great new hiding place is behind a deserted gas station five blocks away. It hasn't been used in years, but the run-down convenience store and gas pumps are still standing. It seems like enough to conceal their car if they park in the narrow alley behind the store.

Bucky turns the car off and doesn't waste any time. He leans across the seat and grabs Steve's face, pulling it to his. Steve can't move toward him as easily as he'd like to. The car is cramped, but at least it smells alright.

Steve's very game to get on Bucky's lap and ride him, but he doesn't get the chance tonight. Bucky rushes to kiss him, his hands frantically clawing at Steve's shirt. Steve grabs for Bucky's clothes too and they rip each other's shirts off so fast they both lose a few buttons. In the moment, they don't care. Their wives will sew them later.

Bucky moves to Steve's pants and when Steve tries to crawl over him, he can't when Bucky's hand wraps around him while shifting forward. With a hand on his cock and Bucky towering over him, Steve tumbles back knocking his head against the window. But he doesn't care, Bucky's pumping him hard and fast now.

He blindly reaches for Bucky's fly, undoes the zipper and sloppily gets his hand in there. He grabs his cock and jerks him off inside his pants. Bucky kisses him messily. It's so needy and urgent this time like they've never done this before.

Steve can't hold back. A few more seconds like this and he's coming, Bucky following right after.

Steve sits panting against the window and looks down at the mess on his stomach. He needs to remember to store a towel away in here, he thinks. After that thought, he looks up and sees Bucky smiling at him.

"Jesus, I got so mad," he says, sitting back.

"I've never seen you so pissed," Steve smirks.

"I really needed... you," Bucky breathes too genuinely.

Steve reaches across the seat for his hand. Bucky takes it and rubs a thumb across Steve's knuckles.

"It's all I look forward to now and when I saw the damn thing gone — I can't believe I got so upset over a fucking outhouse," Bucky huffs out a laugh.

"It was just a shitty toilet," Steve laughs too even though he knows it was more than that.

"You think we could get away with doing this here?" Bucky asks, trying to peer out through the front windshield.

"Might as well give it a shot."

Bucky sits pensively for a moment.

"We need a plan."

"Plan for what?"

"To get away for a weekend."

"How're we gonna do that?"

"I dunno but we gotta figure something out. I don't wanna be crammed in tight spaces with you anymore. I want you laid out on a bed again," Bucky says. Then he leans forward, still holding Steve's hand. "I wanna wake up next to you and fuck you again in the morning."

Steve shivers at the thought. Of getting all night and morning with him. That's a dream Steve can't even let himself imagine. It feels too impossible right now.

"I don't know how we'd..." Steve trails off, staring into Bucky's eyes since he leaned so close.

Bucky closes the space and kisses him.

"There's gotta be something. I could lie about work... some weekend trip."

"It'd have to be foolproof, in case the girls talk to anyone."

Bucky nods, "We'll figure it out."

The next night, they're just as rushed getting each other off behind the gas station.

Maybe it's intentional since the moment they're done, Bucky suggests they start working on their plan.

"Now that we're done with the dirty, it's down to business," Steve quips.

Bucky lets out a kind laugh. He doesn't seem to mind Steve's corny jokes. Peggy never did either. It's strange, Steve has seemed to find the two people in the world who don't mind them. Everyone else seems to.

They list off some ideas but keep getting stuck on the logistics. They need every excuse to be believable for every person involved. There's also the hotel and money for that hotel to worry about. They don't get very far on a plan when they decide they need to get home.

Bucky drives Steve back to his car. When he parks, he stops Steve before he gets out.

"I almost forgot, I can't meet on Wednesdays anymore."

"Why not?"

Bucky sighs dramatically and shakes his head.

"Gail, she wants to schedule our..."

"Sex?"

"Yeah, apparently I'm turning her down too often."

"Oh," Steve tries to sound normal, "Why Wednesdays?"

"I don't know, she just told me that's the right day," Bucky rolls his eyes. "Middle of the week. Would be a good stress reliever. I tried for the weekend but Saturday she goes out dancing and is too tired and Sunday's the lord's day."

"Okay," Steve accepts. He has to accept it.

Steve can't be mad. He's got no right. They both have wives, they're both in the wrong. But thinking about Bucky at home on Wednesday night, sleeping with his wife at their scheduled time makes Steve boil.

On Thursday, Steve straddles Bucky in the car once it's parked. Bucky leans forward to kiss him, but Steve pushes him back against the seat, not letting him. Bucky looks perplexed but turned on.

Steve's still thinking about Wednesday night. He doesn't want to imagine Bucky coming anywhere except with him. He knows it's greatly unfair, Steve sleeps with his wife too. But now Steve has a day, a specific night, he has to sit at home thinking about Bucky coming and not being there.

"Wish you never told me about Wednesdays," Steve gruffs.

"What?" Bucky blinks. "Then you'd be waiting for me in the parking lot."

"Maybe I'd rather think you stood me up than know about the night you and Gail get it on."

He's being ridiculous and Bucky looks at him incredulously for it.

"We don't get it on, Steve. We just do it."

"How is that any different?"

Bucky sighs, dropping his eyes. Steve sits back, on his lap, not able to make much room since he's straddling him.

"Look, once I met you it was all over. I could barely pretend anymore... unless I imagined I was with you."

"I imagined you too," Steve admits low.

"Yeah?"

"All the time."

"So, why're you angry with me?"

"I'm not. I mean, I know I shouldn't be. Just can't help it, sometimes," Steve shrugs.

"Yeah well, I don't even let myself think about you and Peggy. I'd lose it if I did."

"So, what do you do?" Steve smirks, amused.

"Peggy doesn't exist."

Steve chortles. "What about when we all have dinner together and she's sitting across from you?"

"I mean, yeah she exists as a person. But she's not your wife. She's just Peggy."

Steve's eyes widen.

"That's what I have to tell myself," Bucky explains. "Look, don't make fun of me, alright."

"I'm not."

"You're about to, but I really don't wanna keep talking about our wives. I'm hard as a rock here."

"Yeah, yeah. Me too," Steve grins and smashes their lips together in a breathless kiss.

Their plan is officially underway. They've figured out all the logistics.

Steve will ask his friend Mark for a favor, to lie if anyone asks and say they're going on a fishing trip for the weekend. The reason is, Steve's surprising Peggy with a visit from her niece who he's driving across state with. It's nearly foolproof since Mark is widowed, he'll almost never talk to Peggy or Gail and he could care less about lying. Besides, he's the only friend Steve has that regularly fishes.

Bucky is falsifying a business trip. This should work since Gail has never bothered to call his job before. Of course, it's a risk, but she shouldn't have a reason to doubt Bucky's word. He's going to D.C. for training is the story. He's hoping for a promotion is what he'll tell her which they believe will make her happy enough to not get suspicious.

Bucky's side of the plan will work for the hotel. He needs to pay for the room out of pocket since his job isn't willing to pay for the training. He has to do it on his own time and money.

Tomorrow night, they are both going home to talk to their wives. And if all goes well then the weekend is theirs.

[yallemagne]

This year, I'm not doing Dr*cula D*ily

Or any other substack but DD is the biggest. I have numerous reasons for this decision that none of y'all are gonna particularly care for, but ya know, just so we got our expectations in order: I'm not gonna participate in DD this year (maybe never again), I'm probably not gonna reblog many posts related to it (doing so would be counterintuitive), but I am holding myself to finishing Orice (at LEAST the base fic).

Now, why?

TL;DR: Mental health crisis brought on by internet harassment and overprioritizing social media. It's not fun anymore, folks.

DD just... it completely ruined the novel for me.

It was a nice phenomenon, but it took a wrecking ball to my mental health and self-worth. Now, I'm not saying DD's creator personally did something to spite me (or maybe I am, he knows what he did /j), but this whole thing? It wasn't good for me. It was never good. It was sometimes fun, but most of the time it made me want to end it because of thumblr notes.

That's fucking stupid. My life is not worth internet validation. My art is not worthless just because my numbers are not as big as the biggest big shots in the fandom. I'm not a horrible person when other people handle personal disagreements regarding headcanon with defaming rumours and impersonation. But hell! My view of reality was horribly skewed.

A while back, I unfollowed all the gothlit tags I previously followed because 1) Some people (active and popular members of the fandom, mind you, not bots or trolls) were posting honest-to-god name-dropping harassment in the tag because "it's a popular tag so more people will see my callout post" and 2) I reached a point where seeing anything related to the novel on my dash just set me off. It didn't even need to be drama-related anymore. Mentions of the characters, mentions of popular AUs, just the very content of this book became triggering to me, and I really didn't miss the content when it was gone, as sad as that is.

And the kicker? I've come to realize that I probably dislike more things about the novel than I actually like about it. Not only is it tied to some of my darkest moments in recent memory, but it's also just... a book with many flaws that I could go on and on and on about. Sometimes, it straight-up made me furious, like seething mad, and I think I'd rather just be happy. But even when I would try to channel that energy into being happy, I always felt I had to over-clarify or else I’d get bombarded with anonymous messages. If you’ve seen any of my posts from during that time… chances are there is a passive aggressive “btw people can have opposing opinions from you about an old book and it doesn’t give you leave to stone them” or several tags of “#this is a joke #a jooooooke #for the love of god #if y’all don’t stop”. I bet it was as annoying for y’all as it was for me.

P.S. Mutuals/friends, do not worry. Y'all keep doing y'all. I can and will block tags if seeing your posts triggers me. So, I suppose my only request is to properly tag, but I've been saying that from the very start.

I just want to move on to other things.

I took a break for Lent. I needed it terribly. And... not gonna lie? I almost didn't want to return. I never got an itching to just log on and "check in". I very successfully avoided tumb altogether. I came back because "I gotta come back eventually" and also like, this is my main hub where I update when I've written a fic, and ya know... I'm not gonna let toxic fandom bs rule my shit.

During my break, I got back into gaming. More specifically, I started playing Hades again. And listening to Epic the Musical. Aaaand boyyy did that bring me back to my Greek mythology phase. I have a Greek mythos/Hades sideblog btw: @areopagusimp. It's cringe, if you can't tell by the blog name.

Back when I was into Hades game and general Greek mythos, my expectations were so much smaller, but yet, my goals and will to create seemed so much bigger. I made art that no one gave a single solitary shit about (except for my friend), but I was happy. Maybe I'm wearing rose-tinted glasses, but... even if I wasn't as happy then as I remember being... haha at least I wasn't receiving threats and insults in my inbox back then :))). That was the most fun thing about the gothlit fandom. I hope every single chickenhearted angry anon is proud of their behaviour.

But yeah, whatever I end up doing, I’m striving to not let it run me into the ground.

But... What do I do now?

I have so many WIPs (art and writing) for the novel, and it's very disappointing that I didn't get to finish them before it all turned sour. Hopefully, I can still finish them, it just won't be with the same distress I worked with before. Hopefully, I can post that stuff and fully manage my expectations, not crash and burn when only a few people like it. Because hell! A few people liking my stuff? That's amazing, really. I shouldn't take that for granted. At the same time, I'm setting a boundary for myself. Placing my self-worth into the hands of people who I don't know, who don't know me, and who aren't even paying for the art? I need to stop that. Who the hell is that gonna serve? Absolutely no one.

My number one goal is to finish Orice. It is somehow untouched by my aversion to the novel; it is my safe space. I want to honour it and honour the longtime readers who have stuck with me. It's gonna be hard, but it's gonna be worth it for me.

This feels attention-seeking, and it kinda is. I'm not tagging the main subject and I'm not allowing reblogs because I want this to stay isolated (and hopefully prevent backlash/misunderstandings), but ya know, no matter how much I try to keep this small, I'm still posting it online. But I just feel like I needed to get this off my chest. I don't really owe everyone an explanation, but I want there to be one for my own sake... also it's much easier to generalize and make a post than contact each of my friends/mutuals on here and unload stuff onto them that I'm not sure is too personal or not.

For those of you who are reading: I love y'all. I love the good people I've met through all this mess. I want to keep the good apples, not throw out the whole harvest, alright? Dunno how much you'll care for my art when the subject is different, but... eh. If y'all are willing to try?

[realultimatepower]

my friend @marchperi tagged me in one of those "what's your last X" posts, which is the first time anyone has ever tagged me across two accounts on here, so here we go.

Lockscreen

The Vault-Tec-esque style has always been dependable for me. Shit, I gotta plug this thing in.

Last Song Listened To

I was originally gonna say that I couldn't remember and that it was just some song off Yacht Rock Radio on SiriusXM (don't judge me, I'm white, you may as well ask me to stop breathing before I stop listening to Steely Dan) BUT I actually just finished watching the latest episode of The Penguin, and they played a song by SWANS over the end credits, so I'll put that here.

Last Photo I Took

This picture has a story attached to it that I don't feel comfortable sharing because it ended an argument that I still have some lingering frustrations over. Whatever.

Last Movie I Watched

Rewatched this for family movie night yesterday. First time I've seen it again since I was a kid. I liked it a normal amount back then, and I like it the same amount now even if some of my thoughts about it have changed as a result of being slightly more analytical about the movies I watch. I think my only gripe with it is how the romance between Kim & Edward is a little bit too easy. It's not rushed, it just seems to fall in place just because rather than any actual connection between the two. Maybe there's some commentary about how Edward represents a world unlike either of the ones Kim currently inhabits (the 90s rebellion of her generation against the 50s sensibilities of her neighborhood) and that's tempting to her, but idk. I usually write up these letterboxd reviews for the stuff I watch (no, I won't share my account on here) but since I got up for a few minutes to cook my dinner, I didn't wanna write up my thoughts based on a partial rewatch. I'll probably refer back to this post later, though.

Closest Thing to My Left

The remote to my ceiling fan. Lame, but that's the closest thing to me. I'm being fully honest with this.

Last Meme I Saved/Screenshot

This shitty little squirreljak, because the topic of that republican who adopted a wild squirrel came up in the politics channel of this server I'm in, and there's this other guy in the server who posts this pic so often that it's become an inside joke. My opinion on "Peanut"? I think this is a stupid thing for people to rally around, but that's the point. The right is always playing these dudebro games about not taking anything seriously so when anyone calls them out on it the Leftists trying to treat it that way end up looking even sillier. That said, I saw that tweet from some pundit about Trump "winning 48 states if he [puts on a squirrel suit]" and thought it was some gaga about securing the furry vote because I hadn't heard about the Peanut debacle prior to seeing it, and since I doubt that's what the guy intended when he made the post it makes it so I'm laughing at him instead of him laughing at me. All-in-all, I really hope the next time I hear about Trump after he loses in 2 days is about him dying, and then I'll never hear about him again.

Most Embarrassing Song You Have Saved

I don't have a Spotify because I can listen to music on youtube for free with Ublock (or on SiriusXM through my parents' account), but I do keep a playlist on youtube so I pulled the song for this prompt from on there. It took some searching, because i've got over 800 songs spread out over 3 separate playlists that while others may find me to be embarrassing to have in there, I feel no shame over because that's simply the person I was at the time and most of it is still objectively enjoyable (things like a PSG AMV set to the song Danger Days or a Mother Mother song I liked long before they became hip to dunk on). But, I eventually found a song that I thought was funny at the time, but now I think if people knew I ever liked it they'd think I was an actual fan of his.

Most Problematic Movie You Still Watch for Nostalgia

Originally I was gonna edit this to be the most problematic film I feel nostalgic for, because I don't actually rewatch movies that often when there's so many that I haven't seen yet and time is a precious commodity, BUT there actually is a somewhat problematic feature that I do rewatch at least once a year.

Well, "problematic" in the sense that soooo many fans of the original absolutely despise this remake and Matthew Broderick for "butchering" the role of Harold Hill. I still haven't seen the original to compare it against yet, but I have a feeling I'm still gonna prefer this one simply because I love the hokey mid-2000s acting in it as much as I do the musical performances. If you think this is a copout, just ask any theater major you still have contact with their opinions.

I don't know if there's usually a limit to how many people you can tag for this, so I'll pick 5: @visonoda @emosighcrylaugh @st4rm41d @theinsanewombat @thepleasuregoblin

[alybur635]

Hmmm noticed neji is only ever written with the way other anons have described some hcs being in x reader content more so aiming towards woman readers. Which makes sense. People are writing out their fantasies about fictional men that i can get i get but some hcs... do make me question how people can come to such conclusion about his character,

Like where is the whole mean depraved dad dom energy coming from it's obvious projection. I do mind my business it's not my thing or i go to read something where he's in character but it kinda does annoy me when yeah like the other anon said. Treat the fanon as canon or i've seen people force their headcanons onto to others which is not okay. What i also noticed he is not like this in ships again only x reader sometimes its bizarre for me to see his character being wrapped changed.

And then i read a fic of him and shikamaru or tenten for example and it feels like im actually reading his canon version. Also what the other anon said he would def ask for consent on anything people write him doing things just out of the blue and im like????? Uhhhh yeah its a fic but also assault cause just.. no i personally just curate my space block see the headcanon i want to see only following certain people or write my own that's what i have been doing with an oc i created a while ago with him. Best advice block and do what makes you happy anon works for me so far lol

Blocking and muting tags + fics/authors really just be your best bet with curating your space.... best form of self care with your character indulgence right there! Especially grand way to avoid those mischaracterizations you may come across,,,,, I would know-

But really like I think you said, y/n or x reader fics tend to be more self indulgent types of fics (at least in my own personal opinion) and really are where people write out their fantasies or personal interpretations for how characters may act in certain scenerios. And I don't say that to be condescending or bash on anyone, it's your fic and self indulgence is a good thing! It's how people wanna enjoy themselves and their time and I do appreciate that aspect of it.

Though I do agree with you on the annoyance when it comes to people treating fanon as canon material or go out of their way to shove those headcanons down people's throats. It's a good way to suck the joy out of something for someone or to just simply piss people off, that's never fun for anyone.

The differences between those and canon character ship fics? I think the difference there lies with people maybe more wanting to build upon or explore dynamics between two established characters, so I can see there why characterization would be more in line with canon there (I will say though in the same way not every x reader fic mischaracterizes, not every canon character ship fic is completely in character either. I've read some that seemed self indulgent as well, and quite a few mischaracterizations for my faves have been from these kinds of fics-. Then again I'm also hella picky with fics and don't really read too many beyond ones I've already read, ehehe-)

I really honestly think it depends on the fic/author at this point. Hit or miss sort of deal. Really like you mentioned already though, the fic space I think is just something you gotta curate: avoiding hcs and interpretations you don't like + scrolling past or blocking and muting are really all you can do! Better than harassing anyone. BUT this isn't to dismiss your frustrations with mischaracterizations!!! Believe me, I know all to well of the pain with running into Neji, Naruto, or nejinaru mischaracterizations sm! I will be the first to hold ur hand and tell you I get it,,,,, I hear you sm.

(I will be completely be honest with you anon, I.... am not a multishipper with Neji and don't really like shikaneji or nejiten so I have NO knowledge on how in character those fics are, whoops)