#i've got four essays due by the end of this week

[nightdivinity]

Drink Responsibly: Chapter 1

ABO!Vampire!Batfam x reader

Minors! Do! Not! Engage! +18 only!

Platonic!Alfred, Bruce x reader, Possessive! Batboys x reader

Warnings: Bad life choices, possessive behavior, a/b/o, they're vampires, loooong age gaps, no proofreading, reverse harem.

Writer's Note: I am so tired. I exist only because of caffeine and spite. So here you go, Chapter 2 is done as well. It will come out Friday hopefully.

Grey eyes stare into yours as you try your hardest to not squirm under the intensity. How did you get to be where you are? You have no clue. Honestly, there shouldn’t have been a callback. You should not have landed this opportunity for the second interview. The initial screening process should have weened you out in the first place.

From what you had gathered from the chatty chauffeur in the town car, (the town car! They knew you had no car to get to Wayne Manor, let alone to your job. Yet they still sent you someone to go pick you up from your ratty apartment.) This was all ordained by someone much higher than Mr. Pennyworth in front of you. The talk with the chauffeur had almost put you at ease until you looked out the window and saw the heavy iron gate open to Wayne Manor’s winding driveway. There’s no doubt in your mind. You shouldn’t be here. In more ways than one.

It made your bandages itch the more you thought about it. You couldn't scratch them like the feral animal you were deep down inside. At least, not when you're being as heavily scrutinized as you are now.

“I’m not sure you know what you’re getting yourself into my dear.”, the butler says.

“I want this job.”

He sighs then and reaches for the cup of tea sitting on the table next to him. When you got to the Manor, Mr. Pennyworth had met you at the front step. He still ushered you through a side entrance and a winding set of narrow hallways until you reached the sitting room you were now in. Not that you were complaining about being treated like a servant when you were trying to like hell to land the job.

If ever there was an excellent place to kill someone, this was it. You find yourself thinking as you look away from him and study the art on the walls. The manor itself was far removed from society and the small windowless study with the ornate crackling fireplace was oppressive as much as it was impressive. No one would ever hear you scream.

“The issue is not a matter of want. The issue is a matter of need.”, he says.

You watch him take a sip as a bead of sweat collects at the back of your neck. It was getting too hot in here, and the bandage around your wrist was itching.

“I need it. No one wants to hire me”, You reply.

You’re not sure what you expect after you say that. Half of you were expecting him to start grilling you like he did during your interview two days ago. That one had taken place in daylight, in an ostentatious conference room at Wayne Enterprise's.

You were still waiting for him to pick you to the bone and say, “Why is that?”. The other half feels like the admittance makes you guilty. Guilty of going out that night. Guilty of getting caught in a crowd surge while blackout drunk. Guilty of the infected thralls that were unleashed by the Scarecrow goons. Guilty of killing the infected that had started ripping you to pieces. Not that you remember any of it, frustratingly enough. No one, not even the news, gave enough information on that night. Why was I there?

“How are you doing dear?” Pennyworth asks.

You blink. No one has asked that yet. Not by anyone that you feel genuinely wants to know the answer.

“Good. Sore, and I believe honesty is the best policy. I can’t dance like I used to.”, you joke.

It falls flat in the cramped space as you give him a tight grin. His grey eyes dart momentarily to the crutch that was resting next to the chair, and to the cast going slightly above your knee.

“Yes, honesty is such an important quality nowadays. Might I say, it is fortunate that you survived.”

“No one else thinks that. I’m just thankful that Duke was there. I was told he was the one that got me to the hospital. Now he’s gone and got me this interview.”

It’s funny. Time from that night seems disjointed. While you were black-out drunk, you do feel as though you were only in the club for five minutes. The attack happened at 12:45 am. You remember waking up in the hospital and finding your chart on your way to the bathroom. It said you were admitted at 2 am. The next time you managed to grab it, it had said 12:59 am. Not to mention your wounds were healing at a faster rate than most Omegas. Something was picking deep inside your skull.  

 “Luckily this job is not strenuous if you are up to the task.”

You nod at him. You need this.

“Well, there are rather strict rules. Breaking them is a breach of contract that will be handled severely. This isn’t like a regular job out there. Any problems that arise will not result in a simple firing.”, he pauses before continuing, “For example, personal electronic devices are prohibited in the Manor. Your bags will be thoroughly checked by me upon arrival. You will be allowed devices that are monitored by security.”

“I can’t just be cut off from my family”, you protest.

“We don’t want you to. You may make phone calls during your allotted time off. They will happen here, or in Master Bruce’s office with either him or me in the room. Your predecessor was fond of skirting her duties and we have found the need for such restrictions.”

“While excursions are discouraged, they are not prohibited. We will go over those security measures at a later time. You are to be readily available when called upon at any time they require something. While day workers are employed here, at no point are you allowed to interact with them.”

You can’t help the way your brows furrow. This was going to be a long year if you were to take this opportunity. With each rule, you wondered if this was why the position was empty for so long.

“I tend to the bedrooms, and at no point should you enter them unless invited by the occupant. You will be given a room as well, and I would appreciate cleanliness. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner are all served at the same time, tardiness is prohibited.”

“Will I be helping in the kitchen?”, you ask.

“No. Not unless you want to, if you are going to cook, please notify me accordingly.”

“So, wait. I’m confused. Just what is my job here?”

Alfred sighs and for the first time since you’ve met the prim and proper gentleman, he seems a bit haggard. Which did not make you feel good.

“It gets awful lonely here in the manor. As I’m sure you are aware, Alphas live for a long time. Particularly ones infected such as those in Wayne Manor. Now and then it is refreshing to have something that brings more life into such a place. The children have taken an interest in you, and that is enough for Master Bruce.”

“I’m not a toy.”

“No. You’re fortunately not. What you are being offered is room and board, all you have to do is adhere to the rules. In exchange, you have to be a friend. Surely you know how to do that”?

If he had asked your friend, he’d have been met with a resounding no. After that night you had found yourself crippled in the hospital with no friends to speak of. Your friend had been peeved, rightfully so, that you had just packed their wasted butt into a car with a stranger. You had been miffed because hello?? They weren’t the ones chomped on by a deranged rabid Beta. They had made it home in one piece, even getting past the front door and into their bed. Both of you had been wasted, so why act like it was all your fault? You were getting tired of the world treating you like you were the root cause of life’s issues.

“I won’t be doing any of that”, you ask.

Now he just looked downright uncomfortable. You were almost embarrassed, but the question needed to be asked. Being hired to be a friend to Alphas that were at least a century old likely resulted in you waking up in a bed that’s not yours.

“Only if you consent to it. You won’t be reprimanded for not doing it, or if you do find yourself in that position.”, he clears his throat, “Healthcare and dental is provided. Due to your circumstances as an Omega, blockers will be provided along with your daily vitamins. Your health and safety is paramount to us.”

You had nothing more to say. Silently you sat there, running through any alternative options, and yet you kept hitting a wall. There was no denying it, this was the best option you could be given. All you had to do was smile and nod and make it a year. By then you should be able to get your feet back underneath you and be able to reassess your situation. Who knows? You might just like it.

“I’m going to say, you have a deal”, you smile at him.

“Then please, call me Alfred.”

He gets up then and holds a hand out to you to help you out of your chair. His smile back is warm, creases folding up from his eyes, a drastic change from the cold persona that you had started becoming accustomed to.

“Shall I call for the town car Ms. (L/N)?”

This was the start of a beautiful friendship, you decided. You nod your head as he pulls you up and gives you a brisk but friendly pat on the shoulder.

“Duke, you don’t have to do this”, you protest.

It was the thirteen-hundredth time you’ve said it. When Alfred closed the interview, he had taken the time to walk you to the front door, pointing out so many rooms that it all went over your head. You almost made it to the front. Then Duke saw you and took over from there.

“No, no, and for the last time, stop. I want to do it”, Duke grins up at you.

He was on the floor, taping up the last of your boxes. You hate to admit it, but you’re not sorry in the slightest as he does all the heavy lifting. The best part about it was getting to see all the muscles in his back when he turned around. Yum. Hey, you were a red-blooded Omega. There were just some things you couldn’t fight.

“Be careful not to break that”, you warn.

“Right, because what will the world do without these little tchotchkes?”, Duke laughs.

Somehow, not surprisingly, he dodges the stray crutch that you toss half-heartedly in his direction. At this point, he was used to you trying to weaponize your “mobility aide”.

It all started when he helped you get back to your apartment, in a wheelchair that he bought. Then he abandoned said wheelchair and carried you bridal style up several flights of stairs. Citing that the elevator was too dangerous because it hadn’t been inspected in the past decade. Even ignoring you when you told him that it would be far more likely for both of you to fall to your death in the stairwell. This was all two weeks ago, and he still refuses to use the elevator.

He was on the floor now, humming and throwing your shit in boxes. You weren’t sure how he did it. When you agreed to the move, you had been internally wincing and panicking. Thinking it was just going to be you, hopping pitifully around the room. Probably taking breaks and reminiscing over the stray artifacts of your life. You would’ve needed at least three days max to get packed. Duke cut it down to two hours.

“Sooooooooo”, you draw out, “Tell me about the others.”

 “There’s not much to say, not a lot that I can either way. What do you want to know?”

Your eyes narrow as he turns weirdly evasive. He always got a little cagey when you brought up his adoptive family. Never quite answering the question.

“What are they like? Are they nice?”, you ask.

He pauses and stands, turning his back to you so he can put a box on the trolley. We’re going to take the elevator. You thought with a smug sort of glee at the realization. That means you’ll be in your wheelchair. See, you’re slowly reclaiming your independence. Sort of.

“Um. Cass is really nice, but you won’t see her often. Same with Steph. They both kind of do their own thing and no one lives at home besides Alfred, Bruce, and me. Though that might change.”

He pauses again. You stick your tongue out at his back only for him to whirl around to face you. Quickly you snap it back in and try to appear innocent as you stare up. Ew. Popcorn ceiling. You wonder for a second if you could have asbestos in your lungs from that.

“Dick, I mean Grayson, he oversees the training of the Alpha taskforce in Bludhaven. Jason avoids Bruce like the plague while doing the most to get his attention, and I can't really get into what he does for a living. You don't want to know. Tim lives and breathes at Wayne Enterprise’s various global sectors, some of the time, he’s the hardest to track. Damian has been somewhere in Pakistan. Where? I don’t know. I would avoid him and Jason if at all possible. Not that you'll likely see them."

You had to smother your cry of relief. This was going to be a lot easier than you thought. There were only going to be three people that you had to worry about. Maybe you were going to finally complete a New Year’s resolution now that you had time. The world was looking up for you.

“I think that’s it, are you ready?”

His question breaks off your train of thought. You can’t help but groan when he gets near you, arms outstretched, ready for a hug and humiliating you. To make matters worse, he says the worst thing possible.

“Up you go!”, Duke crows.

“No! To the chair! Put me down you overgrown bat!”, you say.

Thankfully he does, gently plopping you down in the cushy seat and stooping to ruffle your hair. You were hissing mad. Not that he cared. Just to goad you further, he reached over to the handles behind your back and rang the obnoxious little bike bell he attached to it.

“Run”, you warn him.

He laughs while sprinting with the dolly all the way to the elevator as you try like hell to mow him down. Both of you completely missed the way his phone kept blowing up with notifications, the small dings being mistaken for a bike bell.

[thehorrortree]

Deadline: August 1st, 2024 Payment: $25.00 - $50.00 for fiction, $5.00 - $10.00 for poetry Theme: Story must begin with: "When she was eight, Alice Henderson briefly held the world record for filling her mouth with marbles." Fall: When she was eight, Alice Henderson briefly held the world record for filling her mouth with marbles. Due date: August 1, 2024 We love that writers around the world are inspired by our first lines, and we know that not every story will be sent to us. However, we ask that you do not submit stories starting with our first lines to other journals (or post them online on public sites) until we've notified you as to our decision (usually four weeks after the deadline). When the entire premise of the publication revolves around one sentence, we don't want it to look as if we stole that sentence from another writer. If you have questions, feel free to drop us a line. Also, we understand that writers may add our first line to a story they are currently working on or have already completed, and that's cool. But please do not add our first line to a previously published story and submit it to us. We do not accept previously published stories, even if they have been repurposed for our first lines. And, just to be clear, we do not accept simultaneous submissions. One more thing while I've got you here: Writers compete against one another for magazine space, so, technically, every literary magazine is running a contest. There are, however, literary magazines that run traditional contests, where they charge entry fees and rank the winners. We do not - nor will we ever - charge a submission fee, nor do we rank our stories in order of importance. Occasionally, we run contests to help come up with new first lines, or we run fun, gimmicky competitions for free stuff, but the actual journal is not a contest in the traditional sense. Fiction: All stories must be written with the first line provided. The line cannot be altered in any way, unless otherwise noted by the editors. The story should be between 300 and 5,000 words (this is more like a guideline and not a hard-and-fast rule; going over or under the word count won't get your story tossed from the slush pile). The sentences can be found on the home page of The First Line's website, as well as in the prior issue. Note: We are open to all genres. We try to make TFL as eclectic as possible. Poetry: We do accept poetry, though rarely. We have no restrictions on form or line count, but all poems must begin with the first line provided. The line cannot be altered in any way. Non-Fiction: 500-800 word critical essays about your favorite first line from a literary work. All Submissions: Writers should include a two- to three-sentence biography of themselves that we can use in the journal should your story, poem, or essay be accepted. Multiple Submissions: We don't mind if you want to submit multiple submissions for the same issue. However, it is unlikely we will use more than one of your stories or poems in the same issue. Four-Part Stories: If you think you are up to the challenge, you can write a four-part story that uses the spring, summer, fall, and winter sentences (five parts, if you are brave enough to include a fifth story that ends with the last line). However, all parts must be submitted at once (a single e-mail or snail mail) before the February 1st deadline. (If selected, each part will be published in its respective issue.) Submissions: We prefer you send manuscripts via email to submission (@) thefirstline (dot) com. We accept stories in MS Word or Word Perfect format (we prefer attachments). Please do not send pdf versions of your story or links to Google docs. Make sure your name and contact information, as well as your bio, are part of the attachment. Stories also can be sent to The First Line's post office box. No manuscripts will be returned without an accompanying SASE with sufficient return postage. Notification: We don't make decisions about submissions until after each issue closes.

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[hitchhikerwithoutguide]

Good News (about me) Tuesday or something idk. Then it gets Bad News

on Friday last week I met my bff, we had a good long chat as we always do, it's always so comforting to talk with her

even tho we're completely different people, we have taught each other so much about the world we live in

on Saturday I was pretty exhausted, I don't do a lot of socializing these days, but I had evening plans and was gonna change my tires

First was changing tires, so I drove to my parents' place and my dad helped me. It somehow gave me energy. I find changing tires to be... tiring, often, but this time I felt really good, just hanging out with my dad and I could do it almost completely on my own. My dad is really just there because I'm so anxious about doing it wrong, and because I don't know where he keeps all the tools and the winter tires, so he has to gather those for me.

It just completely changed the anxiety and exhaustion to a lighthearted, feel good kinda mood.

When we went to our evening plans, to my other closest friend, I was tired but content. We watched all four Ice Age movies and talked the night away.

Sunday I was exhausted when me and my partner got back home, and even more anxious about my studies.

I have an essay due Sunday and I haven't started yet. I've been reading the material several times over and am finding new articles to read about the subject, but I just don't seem to get it.

This is my last assignment before the semester ends, and I've passed all the other assignments, so it feels like I should get it. But I dont. It stresses me out so much.

If I don't finish it this week I will be able to send it in at a later date and my grade will just be postponed, but that will take a toll on my stupid pride. I haven't been behind on my studies since high school. But since high school I've only been reading single semester courses, and only one before the one I'm reading now.

My previous studies were history, a subject I'm already passionate about, and even though I just barely passed, I did pass all assignments on time. But I was 19, I still had the discipline and knew how to make a structured day.

My studies have been... sort of structured. But not in the same way.

I'm also reading a subject I thought would be easy and fun, philosophy, but so far it's mostly been annoying and stressful. It has of course been fun at times! I enjoy the subject, but not as much as I thought I would.

I would do anything for my brain to just. Get it.

Sometimes I think I get it, and I think I'm ready to start writing, but while I sit there I just go completely blank. I think I understand, but when I try to explain it I realize that I actually.... don't understand, at all.

And it's so frustrating.

[ms-demeanor]

Professors who use Canvas or any other canvas/blackboard/whatever online tool to post assignment sheets and accept work come to rely on the tool instead of writing a syllabus.

"Well it's in the modules"

Cool do you have visibility on for all of the modules from the start of the semester? That is definitely worse than just having one schedule to write things down from but I can work with it.

Or do you only reveal the modules a few days before they start, so the first week you have week one and two available? Because that means that I can only plan out one week in advance, which is not enough time for me to know whether I'll be okay to go to my hobby meetup on the first friday of next month or if I'll have a major assignment due at midnight that day. Was I planning on using a weekend six weeks into the semester to go visit my sister? Too bad because after I've paid for plane tickets I found out that you scheduled a project that I need specific equipment for to be due on that Sunday.

Also: you are a college professor. You shouldn't keep your modules hidden because you should allow your students to work ahead.

"But they might do things poorly, or in a way that I don't want them to." Well warn them about that and then let them fall on their face if they have to. They ARE adults and they can figure out whether they'll be able to work ahead successfully or will cope with the results if they fuck up. But if you hide the assignments and they just experience your class as something that happens to them, not something they can plan for and anticipate and prepare for, everyone is going to have a bad time.

When I was getting my bachelor's degree there was some kind of administrative screwup and I ended up not taking a 200-level critical theory class until my last semester of undergrad. It was a prereq for a lot of classes and mandatory to graduate but it just slipped under the radar.

The professor assigned us a $300 literary theory textbook and said "you're going to need this for the rest of your time in college, so it's important to invest in this book" (for the record, it was not - I almost never referenced foundational literary theory papers in my college career, and after 200 level was never instructed to write any paper through a specific critical lens) but the rest of my time in college was the ten weeks of that class. I did not need to buy a $300 ($200 used) book on literary theory.

But the professor had given us a syllabus. And the syllabus included a VERY complete assignment schedule, including the page numbers of all the readings for the semester, which included lots of standalone essays that we had institutional access to AND the 70 or so pages assigned from the $300 textbook.

So I packed up my nice camera and I reserved a room in the library and I took the reference copy of the book that the library had and I took photos of every page that was assigned; when I got home I assembled the readings into PDFs that I labelled with the date that the reading was due.

That quarter I was taking five classes and planning my wedding. I got married a week after graduation. Five classes on a quarter system schedule meant that I was taking 21 units. I was working full time, and I had recently fractured two vertebrae and occasionally missed class because I couldn't stand upright and walk on campus.

The ONLY way I survived that quarter was by sitting down after the first week of classes and taking four hours to write out every single assignment, reading, group project, and exam date in a schedule that I carried with me constantly and referenced obsessively.

If I had had just one professor that quarter who hadn't provided me with a schedule of assignments it could have very well tanked my performance in all of my classes and delayed graduation.

I hear plenty of professors complaining online about students these days, but I can hardly blame students these days being checked out when so many professors these days are checked out as well.

Sometimes college professors like to hop on my posts lamenting the sorry state of syllabi these days and joke about how they haven't thought that far ahead in the course themselves, or talk about how they struggle to complete a schedule for their students.

With all due respect, that's your job. If you can't do your job, you should have a different job. If you need help, ask your colleagues or your department chair or *someone* because I know that professors aren't given a hell of a lot of education on how to educate, so you probably *need* help.

But every single time I make one of those posts I get anywhere from ten to thirty messages, replies, reblogs, and asks say "oh man, that's exactly why I had to drop out of school; I couldn't keep up with the assignments because I didn't know when they were due until the week they were due."

I have been a college student in three separate decades, and "not having a schedule of assignments in the syllabus" is new to my experience. That shit didn't fly in the 2000s or 2010s and I think it likely has to do with professors being overly reliant on apps.

AT A MINIMUM your syllabus should have:

Contact information (including preferred method of contact) for the professor

Office Hours

Grading Policy

Assignment schedule.

Your assignment schedule doesn't necessarily need to have the exact page numbers of every reading or a full assignment sheet for each project, but it should have things like:

December 1st - Major Project 3 second draft due December 9th - Quiz 10 December 12th - Major Project 3 final draft due December 15th - Final Exam

If you end up presenting a more thorough schedule with readings and homework later, that is acceptable to present a week or two into the semester but it is absolutely insane to me that students these days don't know what homework they're going to have to get done over Thanksgiving break during the first couple weeks of class.

If I had three professors at once who didn't give me a schedule, how on earth would I know if I was going to have to read three chapters of a novel, take a midterm and turn in two stats homework assignments, and complete a history research paper the same week that I'm planning to travel to see family? If I'm aware of this from the beginning of the semester I can make sure not to pick up extra shifts, or I can plan to leave a day later to accommodate the midterm, or I can start working on the paper early to complete it before the due date but if I don't know what's going to be due when, I'm going to have a big problem.

If you don't give your students a schedule you are communicating that you don't care about their schedule, and that you think it's their responsibility to contort their life (and their job, and their other classes) around your class, and honestly my advice to students in that situation is "drop in the first week and pick up another class". That's actually part of why I recommend signing up for one more class than you can really manage - if you get a professor whose class looks like it's going to be a disaster because they don't have a schedule, you can bail before the withdrawal period and get a refund for the class.

I'm only in one class this semester but the professor's response has fully dropped me into "Fuck it, I guess I'll fail" mode and I don't even know if I can pull myself out of my current D grade because I don't know how many assignments we have left in the semester.

This is a shitty way to run a class. If you can't do better than this, you shouldn't be running a class.

[kpostedsum]

high | d.m

summary: you find an unhealthy way of coping after draco cheats on you

warnings: drug use (marijuana) angsty¿, cheating, illusions to sex

song: habits - tove lo

a/n: this fic isn’t meant to romanticize drug use in any way. i also know nothing abt weed so LOL and very rushed & not edited

masterlist | taglist

I eat my dinner in my bathtub

Then I go to sexclubs

Watching freaky people gettin' it on

It doesn't make me nervous

If anything I'm restless

Yeah, I've been around and I've seen it all

you had a few minutes left of your charms class which was your last class before the weekend. you wanted nothing more than to get out of here and cuddle up with your boyfriend— who was enjoying his free period right now.

draco was one of the best boyfriends you could ask for, the frequent dates, gifts, and attention— it was more than you could wish for.

“you’re excused. you essays are due at the beginning of next week” snapes monotone voice dragged on as you quickly packed up your things and made your way to the slytherin common room.

I get home, I got the munchies

Binge on all my Twinkies

Throw up in the tub

Then I go to sleep

And I drank up all my money

Days get kinda lonely

entering the slytherin common room your eyes immediately searched for a certain blond boy, yet he was nowhere to be found. you made your way to the boys dorms in hopes of finding him there but you’re quickly interrupted by two familiar voices.

“why hello y/n, marvellous weather we’re having today aren’t we?” theo asked looking towards the ceiling and smiling as if he were outside, blaise blocking your path as he did so.

“i’m not sure what weather you’re talking about since we’re inside but i am okay thank you” you responded with a chuckle, trying to make your way past blaise.

“wait y/n” he stopped you. “can i borrow the astronomy notes? i would ask luna but i can’t find her anywhere” blaise continued.

they both seemed awfully on edge and anxious, you figured it was just quidditch nerves getting to them since there was an upcoming game this week.

“i have yet to finish my astronomy notes, but i did see luna in the great hall if you want her notes. now if you’d excuse me i’d like to see draco” you said trying to push past the two boys who still wouldn’t let you through.

“forget malfoy! let’s do something instead, we’re so much more fun than him, right blaise?” theo said giving blaise a pointed look as he threw his arm around your shoulder.

“right you are nott, let’s go!” blaise continued also throwing his arm around your shoulder and leading you away from the boys dorm.

“what? no, i have plans with draco. now excuse me” you said pushing them both off and heading towards dracos door.

as you get closer to his door you can hear heavy breathing, pants and skin slapping on skin. you’re confused, you figured draco would be taking a nap or running over drills for quidditch practice. the closer you get, the louder the noises become.

“pans, you feel so good”

you recognize that voice anywhere.

You're gone and I gotta stay

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

quickly you turned your head towards blaise and theo who had their heads lowered in shame, refusing to meet your gaze. “is this some kind of sick joke, are you guys pulling a prank or something because this isn’t funny” you said seriously not wanting to believe what you’re hearing from inside of your boyfriends dorm.

“we’re sorry, we tried to convince him not too but he wouldn’t listen” theo muttered silently.

it felt like your world was breaking apart slowly. just not too long ago you were excited to spend a weekend with your boyfriend who you loved so dearly, the same boyfriend who you’ve been dating for years, the same boyfriend who gets jealous about how much time you spend with his mum rather than him.

with shaky fingers you put your hand on the door knob and quickly pushed the door open, already preparing for the worst.

there he was, wrapped up with parkinson in the same bed you two shared not even twenty-four hours ago. her body straddling his naked, just like yours was doing the night before. you stood there frozen, mouth agape— not even knowing what to do with yourself.

“baby, i can explain, just please— y/n please don’t leave” draco said pushing pansy off of him, shuffling on his pants and reaching out towards you.

“dont touch me, malfoy!” you yelled and everyone froze. “you lost the right to touch me the minute you even thought of touching her” you continued sending both him and pansy a glare with tears threatening to slip from your eyes.

“darling please, i can explain—”

“no draco, we’re done just leave me alone, please” your voice cracking at the end as you pushed past blaise and theo rushing towards the girls dormitory.

Spend my days locked in a haze

Trying to forget you babe

I fall back down

Gotta stay high all my life

To forget I'm missing you

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

it’s been days since you last left your room, days since you last saw draco. daphne would come by and check on you but you’d always dismiss her, wanting to be alone. regret is one word to describe how you’ve been feeling— you gave him everything and he threw it away so carelessly for a quick hook up.

you missed waking up against his smooth skin in his embrace, tracing the lines and scars across his porcelain skin as you waited for him to wake up, the way he’d try to kiss you in the morning without brushing his teeth and you wouldn’t let him because of morning breath— but he’d still do it anyways.

you missed him, but he didn’t want you anymore.

maybe it was something you’ve done, you’ve been quite busy with work recently so you haven’t been spending as much time with him as normal. he was probably lonely and trying to seek the attention you lacked to give him.

getting up, you stared at yourself in the mirror picking yourself apart. you were pretty, it was a well known fact around hogwarts, maybe he thought she was prettier. she was the life of the party and always up for some mischief whereas you preferred to do stuff in silence and would rather be with a small group of people. maybe he liked how exciting she was in comparison to you, she probably brought a spark of excitement to his life that you couldn’t.

dreading to feel something you quickly showered and got ready to leave your room hoping to run into a specific set of twins.

Pick up daddies at the playground

How I spend my daytime

Loosen up the frown,

Make them feel alive

I'll make it fast and greasy

I'm on my way to easy

“well what can we do for you today” fred said to you with a cheeky smile plastered across his face.

“do you have any muggle herb left?” you asked in a low voice making sure no one heard you.

“maybe we do, maybe we don’t” george said. “how much are you offering in exchange though” he continued.

“ten galleons for three ounces, is that enough” you said pulling the galleons out of your pockets and placing them in george’s palm.

“it was a pleasure doing business with you” they said in unison as fred placed the tiny baggie in your pocket so no one would see.

once you returned to your dormitory you quickly pulled out the pre-rolled muggle herb, lit it and let yourself forget.

You're gone and I gotta stay

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

Spend my days locked in a haze

Trying to forget you babe

I fall back down

Gotta stay high all my life

To forget I'm missing you

you started showing up to class late with red tired eyes, not caring about the looks you got. at this point every one knew what had happened but you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

the muggle herb brought you a sense of bliss and freedom, a new feeling you haven’t felt before but something that you now craved.

“are you high right now?” draco said as he sat himself in the seat beside you.

“since when do you care about what i’m doing” you said sharply, not wanting to talk with him.

“love, you don’t smoke. who gave that stuff to you, i’ll kill them—”

“no you won’t.” you said turning towards him. “you won’t do any of that because you don’t own me and i’m not your girlfriend anymore. so mind your business malfoy, i’m sure parkinson’s waiting for you”

the rest of the class you both sat in silence working on potions that draco did most of since you weren’t in the correct mind state and he wasn’t willing to let his mark falter over your slip up.

you find it amazing how even when you’re on drugs he still looks amazing. the way his nose curves perfectly with a slight bump, and the way his hands move with caution as he pours the potion into the waste bucket.

“look, i’m sorry for what happened with pansy. it didn’t mean anything i swear, i don’t know why i did it but i regret it with my life” draco said breaking your thoughts, he looked older than normal and had dark circles underneath his under eyes. you wondered why he looked so distraught when he wasn’t the one who got cheated on.

“a sorry isn’t going to fix this draco” you told him. he knew you were right but he didn’t want to admit it. he hadn’t talked to pansy since the day you walked in on them, the guilt has been eating him up inside. he stayed silent and didn’t bother respond to you, he knew anything he said would have made the situation worst than it already is— but how he wished you were still his sweet y/n.

“now if you excuse me, i have some fun to attend too” you said leaving him alone as you made your way back to your dorm.

Staying in my play pretend

Where the fun, it got no end

Can't go home alone again

Need someone to numb the pain

You're gone and I gotta stay

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

over the last few weeks, you couldn’t remember the last time you were sober. you started skipping classes to smoke and avoiding your friends so they’d stop questioning your habits.

you were forgetting and that’s all that mattered, you didn’t care how it was affecting your health— it made you feel better. sometimes you wished there was another way, another way to forget how he held you at night pressing soft kisses to your skin, another way to forget the way he took pansy the same way he took you. you wonder if he feels as sorry as he looks, he’s the one who cheated so he can’t possibly care that much.

you hear two knocks at your door which quickly break you from your state making you more attentive, cleaning yourself up and opening the door. there stood draco— his eyes red as well, like hes been crying.

“y/n listen, i know what i did was wrong and that i tried to pretend it wasn’t me but please. i didn’t mean too, you mean the world to me. i miss you so much love.” he pleaded with you.

“y’know draco, i miss you too” you admitted. “but i’ve found a way to forget about you, maybe you should do the same”.

Gotta stay high all my life

To forget I'm missing you

-

taglist: @mauvea @teenwolfbitches28 @ilygw @nic0lodean @s1ater @henqtic @justreadingficsdontmindme @i-love-scott-mccall @harmqnia @gwlvr @alishahpotter

[ipaaciir]

How do I get good grades?

[ID: A banner that reads "Study tips" in all caps in pale green color, with pale yellow background and a geometric pattern in pale green in the corners. End ID].

If there's something I've learned from getting straight A's at school and university is that it's less about what you know and more about what your habits and skills are.

Look, I have this classmate who is always reading advanced books, listening to podcasts, and watching conferences. She knows A LOT. But this adorable person doesn't do homework, when she does, it's late or poorly done. Her comments in class are lacking coherence and her essays are badly referenced. All of this just lower her grades.

So what can she do? How do I get good grades?

[Disclaimer: these tips are based on my own experiences and observations as I study a social science and some of the things that worked for my in high school, I've also helped my classmate but these tips might not apply to you].

1. Strengthen your language four basic skills.

If you study languages you know we have to practice four skills: reading, writing, listening and speaking. Well, it's not very different for your native language. After all, is with language that we're able to communicate, share ideas and knowledge. You know... like, everything we learn at school (and more).

a. Reading: If you don't know a word, underline it, search the meaning and write it at the margin of the text, on a post it, or in your notebook. Underline main ideas and take notes or write a summary. This will help you not only for better understanding or studying, but also to participate during class. If you need to, read out loud and/or try to explain each paragraph. This is helpful for very complex text. Doing a diagram works too!

b. Writing: Learning how to express our ideas in the written form is... weird. I seriously don't understand why on earth we can't write just like we speak. Why do we must write differently? Is it such a crime? (I mean, I know why, I just find it so interesting and funny). Anyway, must teachers' corrections are like "uSe sYnOnYmS", "bReAk YoUr PaRaGrApHs", "cOnNeCt YoUr IdEaS", "aRgUmEnT mOrE", "UsE aPa CiTaTiOn". So, yeah, follow those comments... I'll try to make a post on how to improve your writing.

c. Listening: Pay. Attention. To. Your. Teacher. I know it's hard, I know some people have a lot of difficulties because of ADHD or other learning disabilities. I can't speak for that, but what works for me is to doodle or embroider, sometimes being on Pinterest works too. Just doing something that requires low cognitive effort while I listen to the teacher keeps me on the class without getting lost in my mind. Even if you didn't do the reading, if you listen to your teacher (and classmates) you'll be able to participate.

d. Speaking. I think many people can imagine how frustrating it is to watch a presentation by your classmates and that they just... don't know how to present?? (it's even more frustrating when you know this people want to become teachers). Practice in the mirror, practice with your pet, practice in the shower, practice everyday. Remember the "explain each paragraph from the reading"? Yeah. When you can explain something it means you understand it. So try to explain everything you learn, everything you understand. Even just chatting with your friends, family, about it. This will also help you to participate in class. The other day a friend of mine just randomly shared her screen and started explaining the bacteria that causes tuberculosis to me... I don't know anything about medicine but I still learned a lot because she knows how to lower her knowledge. Practice. Practice 40hrs a day.

2. Organization.

a. Have a schedule. Set alarms for everything if you must. Look, I forget to eat, literally. I focus so much on what I'm doing that I tell my stomach to stop being annoying and he just... listens to me?? He's like "oh, okay, finish what you're doing and when you're done just tell me and we can go to grab some food". So, I set an alarm to eat, to shower, to have dinner, etc.

b. Color code!! Color coding is my best friend since I was in preschool. Assign a color to each subject. My notebooks or folders are classified by color. My schedule has the corresponding colors. My Trello has tags by color. My folders on the cloud and on my computer have colors. This way I don't mess up things.

c. Agenda. Write all of your assignments (with color code if you can) and everything on an agenda, to-do list, calendar, etc. Whatever works for you, but be conscious of all of your assignments. There was a point when I was in high school that I no longer used the agenda. I would write the homework and never look at it again, I just memorized (by accident) all of my assignments. I seriously don't get how no one noticed I had a big problem called anxiety. Before the modern plague I used a regular week by week agenda and it's what best works for me. I switched to a day by day agenda for a while... A nightmare. Fortnight by fortnight... Anxiety trigger. Now I use Trello since I have to do almost everything on digital.

d. Digital files. You must have well organized digital files on the cloud. I use my color code and my folders go like "university -> semester -> subject". I add a folder for each unit when I have many files. So inside "subject" or inside each "unit" folder I have "readings" and "homework". File names go like "1. Author - Title" for readings and "1. Type of homework (aka essay, diagram, synthesis, etc.) - Author/Title".

3. Discipline

If you don't do what you must when you must... It doesn't work, no matter how organized you are or how smart you are. As I said, my classmate learns a lot outside of school but she doesn't do her homework. I read just the absolute necessary (which I know is not ideal) but I have straight A's. To build habits is complicated, it will be hard but not impossible. Doing a bit is better than nothing. But keep doing stuff.

I have this friend who's very smart but procrastinates a lot, and she still gets straight A's. How? She does things when she needs to. Even 4 hours before the due date but she gets things done because she knows don't completing an assignment will lower her grades.

4. I don't want to do this specific assignment

When I don't find the energy or just want to avoid to do a specific assignment or advance on my projects, I... you're gonna call me nerd and you'll be on the right... I do other homework. Specially on finals. I just don't want to do a certain project and I go "well, what else do I have to do... Okay, this seems easy". And there you got me three days before the important due date with all of my homework for the day after done and the important thing just laying there... BUT, it does help!

That's it for now, I hope they help!

[victorianpining]

I wanted you to know that I haven't stopped thinking about From A Drop of Water since I found and read it last week. It is a masterpiece. I've also devoured your Great Heart essay and the first four episodes of Better Story. Thank you for writing and making them. I was a fan on the outskirts when everything went down, and context is everything.

Thanks to all that, my brain sent me a dream last night of a slightly reworked version of the final confrontation in FADOW... the dream had it occurring at the Roland Kerr college of S1E01. Hope you don't mind but um, here's what the dream had... (oh btw, all the dream said of the earlier parts of the series was the birth of baby Watson, followed by Mary disappearing (back to Moriarty.)) Warning, very... stream of conscious writing ahead.

Moriarty has been baiting Sherlock with texts and other things, but Sherlock has ignored them because he knows Moriarty wants John dead and Sherlock as his prize.

But the strain is wearing on him, and John notices, worries. Though he grapples with his feelings and doesn’t say anything, thinking Sherlock would dismiss his concerns as fussing.

Then Moriarty gets Mary to text John in a calculated move. After some back and forth (possibly over the phone, instead of text?), Mary baits the trap, suggesting John offer himself in Sherlock’s place (or rather, leads John to suggest it).

“There is another option, you know…”

Perhaps she suggests taking Moriarty down together, and tries to sweet-talk him…

But in the end, that’s not what causes John to decide (though the audience might think so at first).

John hands himself over and Mary says: “I knew you’d see sense eventually” with a smile, then leads him to Moriarty (she hopes she’ll get to keep him, after).

Meanwhile, John’s written Sherlock a letter, asking him to take care of little Watson… and revealed his mental state, and a vague outline of his plan.

Some sort of confessional thing. Though it stops short of saying the final confession (love).

It’s enough for Sherlock to realise things are Dire, and he wants to rush off and find John (ooh, perhaps Mary sent a timed text, some sort of ‘save John Watson’ thing?).

Yet there is baby Watson to consider, and John’s entrusting her to Sherlock’s care… he tries to leave and hail a cab to take them to Molly’s, but the streets are eerily quiet.

Then Mrs H arrives back from bridge earlier than expected, having had to walk the last part due to traffic blockages… entrances to Baker St have been cordoned off, and she feared the worst.

(Mycroft, being “helpful” – to John. Prioritising Sherlock’s safety.)

Sherlock summarises the situation to Mrs Hudson, then gives her baby W in exchange for the keys to Mrs H’s car.

“Get inside and stay there, stay away from windows. … if I’m not back with John in an hour, call Lestrade and tell him to make with all haste to Roland-Kerr Further Education College!”

Sherlock goes to be the hero and save John for a third time… back where it all began, at the old college where John shot Jeff Hope for Sherlock.

John nearly sacrifices himself to blow up a Semtex-clad Moriarty or something (a la Drop of Water)… shooting Moriarty with his gun would do it.

But he hesitates too long, and then Moriarty stops him by telling him Sherlock’s arrived and Mary’s got her sights on him

A role reversal scene of The Fall … and Moriarty’s first mistake is reminding John of that

This helps John start putting the pieces together, and he makes a speech of his own… the reason John decided to walk into the apparent trap wasn’t because of Mary, he couldn’t care less about her now.

No, it was his thoughts on Sherlock sacrificing himself for John countless times over the years – most notably The Fall and Magnussen’s shooting – that did it. He did it for Sherlock… just like at The Pool, five years ago.

Moriarty laughs, and makes his second mistake, reminding John that if John had been faster, and Sherlock had run off and left John that night, all of this could have been avoided by John and JM’s deaths. “But he never seems to be able to leave you alone for long, does he, Johnny? And tonight, you’ve signed his death warrant.”

Sherlock is led in by Mary during this speech and he and John stand together against Moriarty… the confrontation forcing John to put the growing revelation on hold.

But still, it’s impossible for anyone not to notice that John and Sherlock are able to communicate with just a handful of glances… “you okay?” “yes… baby okay?” “safe” “why’d you come here, I was trying to stop you having to”

“we’re stronger together” Sherlock says aloud.

Soon, Mary realises that Moriarty was never going to let her have John, and Moriarty kills her with a bullet through her forehead before she can become a liability.

The whole ‘burning heart’ thing happens – Moriarty cuts John’s chest with a knife/ dagger that’s been “sterilised” (as JM puts it) in fire (it’s still white-hot)…

Sherlock screams John’s name when this happens, and John looks over and finally starts observing.

Then John realises… he wants to live. (Not just because of the potential of Sherlock, not just for baby W, but for himself.) He finally stops blaming himself for things that weren’t his fault and decides to live.

Of course, that means getting rid of Moriarty first…

idk how, because he’s wearing Semtex, so how do John and Sherlock escape when there's no water to absorb an explosion?

After, there’s the “John? Say you’re not hurt!” moment.

The final confirmation… and John knows.

Which would, of course, lead to a love confession… back in Baker Street.

Thank you so much for sharing this with me! I hope you don't mind me posting it too. I'm so fascinated by the bits of my version your dream kept AND the ways you took those details as a springboard for a new scenario. Great job to your subconscious, very symbolically resonate detailing here, all very in character, I love it.

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

COSMIC - S1:E1; Chapter One, The Vanishing of Will Byers - [Pt. 3 - FINAL]

A Will Byers x Male!Reader Series

𝘖𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥'𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘧𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘏𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘢 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥.

|| 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕 ||

The bell rang, signaling the end of class. The guys and I were quick to pack up our belongings before making a beeline for Mr. Clarke's desk, eager to see if the Heathkit came. All the while Mr. Clarke was reminding the already fleeting class of our homework assignment.

"Remember, finish chapter 12 and answer 12.3 on the difference between an experiment and other forms of science investigation. This will be on the test, which will cover chapters 10 through 12. It will be multiple choice with an essay section." His voice faltered towards the end of his sentence as he realized no one had been paying attention.

His head turned to us and he didn't seem too surprised to see us so eager. Mike couldn't take the wait any longer and spoke up on the behalf of all of us.

"So, did it come?"

Mr. Clarke looked solemn. "Sorry, guys," Our heads began to hang in disappointment at his words. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but... It came!"

My face lit up with relief. We followed Mr. Clarke down the halls in anticipation. Mike got to the door first and eagerly threw it open, the rest of us close on his tail.

"Yes!"

Since Mike was the first through the door, naturally he dove for the desk chair as the rest of us scuttled over each other, each of trying to get a close look at it. Lucas and I seemed to have the same idea as we fiddled with the knobs on the Heathkit as Mr. Clarke addressed the new device we were all so eager to see.

"The Heathkit ham shack," The boys and I were in awe.

"Ain't she a beaut?" Mr. Clarke sighed. Dustin then spoke up. "I bet you could talk to New York on this thing."

"Think bigger." Said Mr. Clarke. I rose my eyebrow and looked to my teacher as I questioned, "California?"

"Bigger." 'No way.'

"Australia?" Mike pressed. We all turned out heads hopefully to Mr. Clarke as he responded with a smile and the shake of his head. We all exclaimed.

"Oh man," Lucas chuckled in excitement. "When Will sees this, he's totally gonna blow his shit." My smile faltered at the mention of Will, as Mr. Clarke scolds Lucas for his foul language. Lucas apologized turning back to the Heathkit, and I shake my head slightly trying to get my mind off of Will.

Lucas seems to have found the right settings on the dials based on the high pitch frequencies coming out of the Heathkit. Mike has the headphones on and begins to speak into the mic in an Australian accent.

"'Ello, this is Mike Wheela', president of Hawkins Middle AV Club."

Dustin then practically ripped the headphones off of Mike's head, a big goofy grin on his face as he placed them on his head. Mike was in a fit of giggles as he spoke. "What are you doing?" Dustin proceeded to do the exact same thing as Mike just moments ago.

"'Ello, this is Dustin, and this is the secretary and treasurer of Hawkins Middle AV Club. Do you eat kangaroos for breakfast?" I giggle, shaking my head thinking about the poor confused soul who is stuck listening to the boys ramble on. As Lucas grabs for the headphones, I turn around so I'm facing Mr. Clarke, and I give a polite, yet warm smile. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome Mr. Henderson," He returned the smile, seeming appreciative of the fact that at least one of us said 'Thank you'. He has always been a great teacher, and I don't think anybody ever really appreciates or even thanks him very much. I can't imagine how frustrating it can be as a teacher. I laugh to myself at the sight of my friends playfully fighting over who gets to use it next, when our fun gets cut short at the sound of a knock on the door. We all turn our heads to see the Principle walk in, a couple of men behind him.

"Sorry to interrupt, but, uh, may I borrow Y/N, Michael, Lucas, and Dustin?" To say my stomach dropped would be an understatement as I got a better look at the men out in the hallway and realized it was the Chief and one of his officers.

My mouth ran dry.

'Will.'

The four of were seated on the couch in the Principal's office, Chief Hopper, and officer Callahan - I believe his name was - seated in chairs opposite us. I was seated between Mike and Dustin, I kept my mouth shut unless told otherwise, and my hands have woven together in my lap, much too afraid to do otherwise. The boys, on the other hand, were freaking out and all trying to speak at once. I tried nudging them warningly with my elbows but they just ignored me. It seemed I had made the right choice in being quiet, as Hopper seemed to have gotten impatient almost immediately.

"Okay, okay, okay. One at a time all right? You." He points Mike. Mike shakes his head. "You said he takes what?"

"Mirkwood."

"Mirkwood." His face scrunched up in confusion.

"Yes," I croaked involuntarily, wanting to explain to him that it is just our name for road.

"Have you ever heard of Mirkwood?" He turned to the officer.

"I have not. That sounds made up to me." The officer replied. This timid, awkward man gave me the impression he was more of a 'Yes-man' and knew nothing about what he was doing.

"No, it's from Lord of the Rings."

'Oh, here we go.' I think to myself, sighing.

"Well, The Hobbit."

Mike and I look at each other, knowing what's happening.

"It doesn't matter." Lucas retorted.

"Knock it off!" I warn, trying my best to throw my whisper across the couch without drawing attention to myself.

"He asked!" Dustin nearly shouted.

"Guys!" I hissed.

"'He asked'" Lucas mimicking Dustin, not even listening to me.

I looked over at Mike for help but he is already checked out.

They continue talking over each other in a childish manner and the chief leans forward trying to silence them.

"Hey, hey, hey!" They quieted down finally. "What'd I just say? One at a damn time. You." He nodded to me. He seemed to tolerate just Mike and me.

"Mirkwood, as Mike was saying. It is a real road. It's just the name that's made up, it's what we call it. It's where Cornwallis and Kerley meet." I finish.

He seems satisfied, finally having a straightforward answer. He leans back in his chair, talking now to Callahan.

"Yeah, all right, I think I know that—"

"We can show you, if you want." Mike offered hopefully, cutting the chief off mid-sentence.

"I said that I know it!"

"We can help look."

"Yeah" Dustin added hopefully.

"No."

And just like that, the boys begin to talk over each other once again. Knowing better than to waste my breath trying to shut them up, I sit back once again, hands in my lap waiting for the Chief to continue.

"No," He says loud enough to quiet the boys. "After school, you are to all go home. Immediately. That means no biking around looking for your friend, no investigating, no nonsense. This isn't some Lord of the Rings book."

"The Hobbit."

"Shut up!" Lucas gave Dustin a swat on the arm.

Dustin reached over and hit Lucas back, knocking me and Mike back in the process. I roll my eyes in annoyance, and fight every urge I have not to shout at them.

"Hey!"

Mike finally snaps. "Stop it!"

They continue hitting each other and Hopper finally leans over and says quietly, in an irritated tone. "Do I make myself clear?"

I was the only one paying attention so based on his tired, lowered voice and his eyes on me, I could tell he was just talking to me at this point.

I shook my head. "Yes," I mutter.

He nodded his head at me in thanks. All the while, the boys were still bickering. Hopper's gaze landed on the boys, and he stood up and walked forward towards us. The way his tall frame towered over us was overwhelming, and enough to shut the boys up. In a deep, intimidating voice, he repeated his words, slowly.

"Do I make myself... clear?" The boys nod their heads in fear, their necks craning up to meet his eyes.

"Yes, sir."

"Yeah."

"Yes."

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

I've been laying in my bed, staring at the ceiling for about thirty minutes, give or take a few. I had managed to do all of my school work, including my project that wasn't due for another week and a half, read three books — granted, they were fairly short — and I was still left with nothing to do but worry about Will. The fact that I'm not allowed to help is driving me crazy, even though I keep trying to tell myself the adults are better equipped to deal with this stuff. My thoughts are interrupted by the crackling of the walkie-talkie that was sitting on my dresser. Since our mom couldn't afford two walkie-talkies, Dustin and I share one. I usually have it though so I can talk to Will.

The voice coming through sounded like Mike. Rather than getting my hopes up I just decided to stay put, staring at my ceiling, listening in.

"Lucas, do you copy? It's Mike. Lucas? Over."

"Hey, it's Lucas."

"I know it's you. And say 'over' when you're done talking so I know when you're done. Over." I roll my eyes and smile.

"I'm done. Over." I chuckle at this.

"I'm worried about Will. Over." My smile quickly falls.

I can hear Lucas sigh. "Yeah. This is crazy. Over."

"I was thinking..." Now I was really paying attention. "Will could've cast Protection last night, but he didn't. He cast fireball. Over." I sat up slowly, my eyebrows furrowed at the walkie.

"What's your point? Over."

"My point is... he could've played it safe, but he didn't. He put himself in danger to help the party. Over." A bittersweet smile flutters across my face briefly at this.

"Meet me in ten. Over and out."

'To hell with adults.' I tell myself. I leap off my bed and grab the walkie, knowing they'll still be able to hear me.

"Forgetting someone? Over."

"Y/n? Over." It was Mike.

"Don't worry, I'll let Dustin know. Over and out."

I retract the walkie before shoving it into my bag and heading for Dustin's room.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

Once I had caught Dustin up on everything, the four of us had met up and we are now currently riding down Mirkwood. The thought of my best friend disappearing right here, exactly 24 hours ago was enough to give me chills.

"Ah, man. This is it." Lucas broke the silence as we approached the barrier closing off the path where his bike was supposedly found. We all came to a stop.

For a brief moment, the woods were lit up by lighting in the distance as thunder bellowed across the sky. Dustin looked up at the blanket of clouds above the trees, his voice shaking.

"Hey, guys. You feel that?" He was obviously referring to the rain that fell on his face. I roll my eyes. "I think maybe we should go back."

"No!" Mike and I said simultaneously.

"We're not going back. Just stay close." Mike and Lucas continued on into woods. I was eager to follow them but not without trying to reassure my brother.

"Dustin, he's right. Look, I know you're scared right now, okay? I'm scared too, but can you even imagine how scared Will must be? We have to do this. For Will." I didn't wait for a reply and ran to catch up with Mike and Lucas.

Knowing my brother, he would rather stay in a group than split up. Sure enough, he gave in.

"Hey, guys, wait up!" He said, dropping his bike. "Wait up!"

We started walking again, and as we did it I could feel the rain start to soak my neck and shoulders. I pulled my hood up over my head, turning on my flashlight and set off into the night, eager to find my friend.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

The thunder rumbled, and as we ventured deeper into the forest I could feel the light drizzle of rain evolving into a steady downpour.

"WILL!"

"WILL!" I cried.

"Byers!" Lucas yelled.

Dustin tried a different approach. "I've got your X-Men 134!"

Our flashlights were hardly making a difference at this point. Dustin spoke up again. "Guys, I really think we should turn back."

"Seriously, Dustin?" Lucas exclaimed. "You wanna be a baby, then go home already!"

"I'm just being realistic Lucas!"

"No, you're just being a big sissy."

"Did you ever think Will went missing because he ran into something bad? And we're going to the exact same spot where he was last seen? And we have no weapons or anything?"

I start to slow down once I heard something in the bushes.

"Dustin, shut up." Mike spoke up.

'Okay, thankfully, Mike must have heard it too.'

"I'm just saying, does that seem smart to you?"

"Dustin!" I snap. "Zip it!"

Now the rustling was loud and clear.

"Did you guys hear that?" Mike asks.

I just shake my head, looking around for the source of the noise. The rustling is louder than ever and we all turn in the direction it came from. All our flashlights pointed in that direction. Then we heard it again. It was right behind us. We whipped around to find a girl, with a buzz cut, wearing nothing but 'Benny's Burgers' tee t-shirt. We all stood there, mouths agape at this girl, shivering and cowering in fear.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

❥ Let me know if you would like to be added to or removed from the taglist! ❥

[starlit-serenade]

Blanket Pile

💜 Summary: Your assignments have been weighing you down and stressing you out, but thankfully, your friends know exactly how to cheer you up.

💜 Word Count: 1,364 words

💜 Pairing: No Pairing / Characters: GenderNeutral!Reader; Bang Chan; Lee Minho (Lee Know); Seo Changbin (Changbin); Hwang Hyunjin (Hyunjin); Han Jisung (Han); Lee Felix (Felix); Kim Seungmin (Seungmin); Yang Jeongin (I.N);

💜 Rated: E / Warnings: Some school anxiety / Genre: GenderNeutral!Reader; Fluff;

💜 A/N: I did a Oneshot bc I've been much more in a Oneshot mood, rather than a reaction mood recently I hope that's ok! 💗

You've been sitting in this chair all day, staring at your computer screen and doing nothing for what feels like hours. A list of all of your assignments due sits nearby, and you can't bear to look at it again, else you'll just be reminded of just how overwhelmed you've been feeling and why.

You have two windows open on your computer. One is a half-written essay due tomorrow, and the other contains a thirty-something page document you have to read and annotate for a seminar the day after. That's just two of the many assignments you have to do this week, and you don't have the energy to complete these two assignments, much less the several other ones.

You have several assignments to do. And you know you have to do them. But when you even think about them, you feel the world crashing down on you. You're so overwhelmed and feel so stuck. Your back is killing you from the stress. Or maybe it's because you've been sitting in this chair, hunched over the table for possibly much longer than what's good for your posture. But what else can you do?

You put your head in your hands and groan. You're grateful your friends let you come over here to their dorm to work on your studies. You had mentioned that their dorm is easier to focus in than your own bedroom. And their chairs are much comfortable for your back. But nothing can help the pain and stress from feeling overwhelmed.

Just as you feel you're about to burst into tears, you hear the front door of the dorm open, followed by laughter and lots of footsteps. You recognize the voices immediately as your friends, the members of Stray Kids, and smile. They must be done with practice for the day. That's perfect, they always know how to cheer you up and make you feel better.

"Y/Nie," you hear Jisung say from the doorway. He comes over and wraps his arms around you in a comforting hug. "Hi Y/Nie, how's schoolwork goin'?"

You let out the heaviest sigh, relaxing the slightest bit into Jisung's hug, and hear footsteps as someone else enters the room.

"That bad, huh?" Bang Chan asks, and you nod. You can see him out of the corner of your eye, looking at your to-do list of assignments. "Looks like you already got through four of them! That's half already!"

You shake your head. "I'll just get two more tomorrow. Won't make that much of a difference."

"But you don't have them now. Have you been able to take a break yet?" Bang Chan asks. You shake your head.

"No. I feel like I haven't done enough. But I can't do anymore right now. Brain won't let me."

"Y/Nie, you should take a break," Jisung says.

You wiggle out of his grasp and place your forehead on the desk.

"I still have a couple assignments left to do," you grumble, and you can feel tears coming to your eyes. "I need to finish them."

You hear Jisung sigh.

"Y/Nie." You lift your head at the new voice, and see that Changbin is kneeling next to you, looking at you with worried eyes. "You've been at this for hours. And you can't even focus anymore. Look at you, Y/Nie, you're exhausted. Give it a half an hour break, ok?"

You sigh heavily. You want to continue work, but you know that there's nothing left to force out of your brain right now. You can feel the tears brimming your eyes, and squeeze your eyes shut, shaking your head. You don't want to cry over some schoolwork . . . some schoolwork that's been causing you stress all week.

And you turn around to break down and cry into Jisung's chest. He rubs your back gently, murmuring comfortingly to you, something about how it's okay, you have time, something about the rest of the boys in the living room, so you nod and let him help you out of your chair.

You follow Jisung, Chan and Changbin out to the living room, and your eyes light up at the sight. The other five boys Minho, Hyunjin, Felix, Seungmin and Jeongin, had moved the table against the wall opposite the couch, and in its place, had gathered all of the pillows and blankets of the whole dorm to make a giant pile or nest of coziness. That's at least eight blankets and maybe more than ten pillows that the boys are arranging or sitting on.

"Y/Nie!" Jeongin says, grinning from ear to ear, sinking into the blankets. He sees how tired you are, and that you're all teary, and his entire expression changes as he pushes himself to his feet and walks over. "Y/Nie, are you okay?" he asks, voice filled with worry as he cups your cheeks between his hands. His thumbs brush over your tear-stained cheeks as he looks at you.

"I'm okay," you mumble. You can feel Jisumg squeeze your hand next to you, encouraging you to continue. "I'm just stressed. From all of my homework and studying. It's been weighing me down a lot."

"Has it? I'm sorry Y/Nie. Are you taking a break?" Jeongin asks, one of his hands moving down to your free hand to squeeze it reassuringly.

You nod. "Yeah. For maybe half an hour to an hour."

"Y/Nie!" Felix calls out, and you squint to see him in the nest of blankets and pillows. He's buried under some of them, his head poking out from between two pillows. "Y/Nie, you should come and snuggle in the blanket pile!"

He reaches out for your hand, and you walk over to him, letting go of Jisung and Jeongin's hands to take Felix's. As soon as his hand touches yours, he grabs your hand and pulls you into the blanket pile.

You fall on your side in the pillows, eyes squeezed shut as you expect to fall through and hit the floor. Instead, you find that eight layers of blankets is so much cushion that it feels like you've fallen into a cloud.

You let out a laugh, amused at the thought that you can't feel the floor through the layers and layers of blankets. You close your eyes and let yourself sink into the blankets, allowing them to swallow you whole. You feel like, instead of being at the dorm with a week's worth of homework on your shoulders, you're in the sky, in the clouds.

Someone pokes your cheek and you open your eyes and look at Hyunjin, who still has his hand outstretched.

"You smiled!" Hyunjin says, poking your cheek again, causing you to let out another laugh. "And you laughed!"

You smile. "I did! I just thought it was funny how fluffy all these covers are."

Hyunjin throws a pillow at you. "Cutie."

Jisung jumps onto the covers next to you. "You're right! This is fluffy," he says, giggling and smiling.

You laugh and throw the pillow back at Hyunjin. Jisung lifts the end of one of the blankets and throws it over you and starts rolling you up and bundling you in the covers, which makes you burst into laughter.

"Cutie," Jisung says. "How're you feeling, Y/Nie?"

You breathe out a laugh, content in the blankets swallowing you. "I'm feeling good! Cozy!"

Jisung grins widely. "That's good! Feeling better?"

You nod. "Mmhmm! Much much better."

After a bit of lying down in the blankets and pillows, someone turns on the Korean drama you guys had been watching a while ago. Someone brings you a bowl of ice cream, and you all snuggle together in the blanket pile while watching the drama. You feel relaxed, and it feels like the homework and back pain has dissolved into nothingness.

You know that this bliss isn't permanent, but you also know that the stress of the work isn't permanent either. And right now, you get to bask in the comfort of lying in these blankets, surrounded by your closest friends. And you're content with this distraction and comforted knowing that they'll always be here for you.

[ancient-mystical-features]

the busy series (e-journal, again)

February 5, 2022

Busy Ep. 1

This probably won't be my last time of using that as a title, so I put an Ep. 1 so I can use it as an excuse to resuse the title. I'm not a fan of adding a title to these entries, but oh well. We're pretty busy with filling out the content plans with student's names for our class project. The project proposal is due on Monday. RIP us.

🚀

February 22, 2022

✉️

BU is so much work. Like why do I even bother going through all this process? Why do I even bother applying? I'm not even planning to go? As a lot of my friends say: "For clout lang." 🤡

🚀

March 11, 2022

7 days before my funeral

Due on March 18:

JECS Essay Exam

JECS Spoken Word PC

HMSS116 Poster (DONE)

HMSS116 Reaction Paper

🚀

March 12, 2022

Busy Ep. 2

I surprisingly did well with spontaneously interviewing someone for our project, especially that it had been my first time. It wasn't necessarily a comfortable experience but I mostly felt well. I am currently in another meeting and really busy with a lot.

Do not be deceived with the title. This is not just my second time being busy. I just use the title when I can't think of anything else and too busy to write a bunch.

🚀

March 13, 2022

5000 characters in one sitting

I got to write an entire essay in one sitting on a SUNDAY. I don't do stuff on Sundays intentionally. I dedicate Sundays and after-dinners for myself with no school nor org-related stuff to do unless if it's urgent. Since a lot are due next week on Friday, I figured I'd compromise last night and use that time to do one of the major stuff I needed to do. I uhh wasn't able to do that. But hey don't bite my ear off, I compromised Sunday anyways instead and I was able to finish my draft in one afternoon.

🚀

March 14, 2022

Busy Ep. 3

I can't write a lot right now but I'm working on something good!!

🚀

March 16, 2022

Busy Ep. 4

I finished all four major stuff to be submitted on Friday. Seems like I don't have to bury myself six feet below the ground after all.

🚀

March 25, 2022

Busy Ep. 5

I wrote another letter to myself last night, to be opened two years from now. I'm a little busy today prepping for tomorrow and finishing stuff and also attending a meeting and another after this one.

🚀

April 6, 2022

Busy Ep. 6

I remember typing that title yesterday, but something might have came up that got me distracted and I was unable to continue writing. Yesterday (or, well, the date in this entry) was quite a lot. We had to finish our project proposal and brainstorm on specifics so we could submit the proposal for approval in the morning so it wouldn't be pending until the end of the holy week. I was drained out yesterday but our late night call to brainstorm the rest of the stuff was fun and you could hear us either crying or laughing, we weren't sure. We even got to invite really great speakers (ONE OF THEM WHO I'M A FAN OF AND I CAN'T SPILL DETAILS BUT SINCE I BET THERE'S A GOOD CHANCE THAT NOBODY'S GONNA SEE THIS BUT HE WAS IN AHEB THE MUSICAL WOO). This event is a big one. And I hope we'll be able to keep our sanity by the end of it.

🚀

April 21, 2022

lots on my plate

One more move and I'll be experiencing another major burnout. I still have a PT due tomorrow and ALD and our culminating activity on my plate. I'm gonna take an hour break with an episode of OITNB before I fall apart.

🚀

April 23, 2022

work

We went to the vet this afternoon so work starts a little later than usual. I knew ALD was gonna be heavy but you never really realize just how heavy it is until a few days before the event when you're all in shambles.

🚀

April 24, 2022

prep

I am currently preparing the stuff to be donated for our Community Engagement Outreach.

🚀

April 26, 2022

Busy Ep. 7

It's been a while since I've watched OITNB. I don't even have a minute these days. It's reasonable though, and I kind of expected that. I just didn't expect myself to be mentally all over the place and not as organized as I was in my first project.

[smileystudies]

I'd be super interested to hear your thoughts & experience with homeschooling! (based on the tags from that post haha not just randomly asking)

hey anon, thanks for asking me about this! sorry it took me so long to reply but I wanted to do this some sort of justice. my answer has turned into a bit of an informal essay, so add a cut here.

my experience

first, a little background. I was homeschooled with my siblings from preschool to the end of eighth grade (fourteen years old) in a moderately wealthy and predominantly "white" (largely Anglo American) county in the US. this was not the typical "homeschooling" where kids are left to their own devices a la Island of the Flies. instead, I was "enrolled" in a program that provided some in-person classes, textbooks, and teacher-advisors who made sure I was on track with my education.

there were a lot of things I liked about being homeschooled. after I finished my math exercises and some science or history chapters from the textbook, which was usually around noon, I was free to do whatever I wanted. for me, this usually consisted of minecraft (our play time limited to thirty minutes), playing in the mud, creative writing, and rereading the same books. we also had lots of opportunities to pursue arts--for instance, I took acting classes and had piano lessons from the time I was four. I also got to go as fast or as slow as I had to, which was great for subjects I loved like literature and also subjects I struggled with like math.

there were also a lot of things I disliked. for instance, when I was in seventh grade, I started feeling cloistered, trapped. it wasn't that I wasn't allowed to leave--I visited friends and had classes a couple times a week--or that I lived in an abusive home, but more that I felt like everything big and important was happening outside. part of the problem, I think, was that, due to various types of cultural dyspohoria and intergenerational trauma, I grew up without a sense of real community outside my home.

spending every day around my parents and siblings probably compounded whatever gifted child syndrome I had going on, which made it difficult to transition out into the world. when I started at in-person high school, I was playing catch-up in terms of not only social skills, but also pop culture. on one hand, that insulated me from racism, ableism, and the toxicity that american culture can be sometimes, which allowed my parents to transmit more of their values to me. one the other hand, I was unable to connect with a wider Latino community outside my household, which left me feeling like a bit of an imposter.

in some ways, I legitimately feel like I've only just finally got up to speed. now, while I still feel a disconnect with mainstream american culture, I understand it and can engage with my peers in a healthy and rewarding way.

that's not to say I don't love my family. I really can't say whether I'd have the same close relationship with them if I'd attended traditional school in the US. there's also a lot to be said for assimilative and colonizing pressures that affected my family, and I appreciate how homeschooling shielded me somewhat from them. at the same time, the experience deepened a perceived divide between my home culture and the world outside--a constructed reality that has many pros and cons.

generally speaking

once upon a time, I thought that if/when I had kids, they would definitely be homeschooled, too. I used to think that it was the reason why I maintained a love of reading and learning.

I don't think that's true anymore.

maybe being fully used to school would have set me up to be even more proactive with my studies in college. maybe I would have grown up with a healthier relationship to failure and being "gifted" and finding my passion in the world. these are imponderables, though.

there are still reason I think well of homeschooling. I think it allows kids to have more experiences in their childhoods, maybe as an actor or traveling with their parents (though these situations are usually reserved for the wealthy). from what I've seen, it's also been helpful for students who are struggling with school (from bullying, learning disorders, self-esteem, etc) to have a breather.

on a more ideological level, I would argue that, by centering learning in family and community, homeschooling can be a truly anticolonial practice. it's the inverse of boarding schools. done properly, it could be the future of our pre-university educational systems.

then of course I'd have to define "done properly", but I think that's beyond the scope of this post.

seeing what schools are like in my city in spain has also helped transform my opinions. there are students with strong social connections (to peers, teachers, their neighborhoods, their families, and beyond), an interest in learning, something that seems more difficult in the US. the community connection seems to be stronger for my students, though that could also be a more general divide between the social realities of urban and suburban spaces.

once, I had felt outraged about laws requiring children to attend school. now I know so much more about abuse and religious cults, and so much more that I firmly believe that homeschooling should be regulated. for this reason, I sometimes really worry about US american homeschooled kids I meet these days. the question, then, is: how do we regulate it? how do we provide freedom and flexibility while also preventing extremists from brainwashing and abusing children?

for me, the bottom line is that education MUST be centered in community, whether it's at a formal school or in homeschool system. that, I think, is where you gain a lot of power. where there is no community, there is a dangerous vacuum that can be filled with all kinds of toxicity--ideologically, psychologically, physically, etc. we can still use homeschooling to reimagine the way we teach our kids; it's simply not enough on its own.

now I know I haven't captured everything and I know I'm just starting to unpack my own experiences. if you're reading this and have a different perspective, I invite you to chime in as long as you're being civil. education reform is a dialogue!

xo

isabel

[peachhyychenle]

Hi, I’ve returned from the hole that is final projects🥲I’m so ready for this semester to be over with.

But that still sounds nice! I hope you all have a great time and hopefully eat lots of yummy food☺️I’m the same way, I don’t really have any traditions with my parents. Other than we watch these specific Hallmark Christmas movies (they’re actually quite funny and not all that cheesy) but that’s it😂

I got into kpop in 2016 as well! And I found Nct 127 specifically when they had their cherry bomb comeback (it’s a long weird story) but same as you, I didn’t really stan them till 2018. But Touch was such a great concept, I loved the soft look for the boys, I hope the do that again because it was so cute🥺💕

Do you have a favorite Nct era? It can be any unit☺️

-Secret Santa❄️

hello, welcome back, i hope finals went well! haha same, i have four essays due in by the end of the week then i can chill

you know, i don't think i've ever seen a hallmark christmas film before lmao,, you'll have to recommend me a few!

yeah, like i remember seeing the dreamies debut but then thinking they looked too young and i would never get into them,, now look where we are 😅 ahh same it was such a soft era, i really wish for them to do it again too!

ooo i think my favourite era must be superhuman. i loved the concept and the mini album, plus it always reminds me of the world tour and when i went to go see them at the London stop!! i think besides that, my other favourite eras are moonwalk and we go up!

[teomuchtohandle]

Me, up at 5:30 AM instead of my usual 7:30 AM, eating half of pomegranate and waiting for my tea to cool down to an acceptable level of temperature: ~Self-Care~

Nah. I'm just having a Bad Time in general.

I've been off my anti-depressants for...I think two weeks? Time isn't real. Anyway, I felt really good off them originally. But now I'm learning to self-regulate my emotions again and that isn't fun.

And then there's the day I had yesterday.

"Oh no Drea! Tell us more!"

If you insist.

So it started with breakfast yesterday. Milk, Water, Sugar, Salt. Long ago the four elements lived in harmony- Anyway. They went into my pot on the stovetop for some Yummy Oatmeal, yeah? And then my brain just. Forgets it exists until I smell caramel.

My pot had overflowed and burned until it looked like A Literal Portal To Hell. So I cleaned that mess up. I had used the last of my milk to make it too, don't get more until my CSA box on Wednesday, so the oatmeal I made to replace it wasn't nearly as good.

So that was straw one. Next came my work. I'm mentoring a new person for the next two weeks. But!!! Someone messed up the schedules. My old schedule was 9:50 AM to 6:20 PM. I got switched to a supervisor schedule for October and November since I was helping that team, 8:30 AM to 5 PM. Guess which one they had on the mentoring sheet?

Yeah, that was partially on me. I should have double-checked it before The First Day. Anyway, I message people and let them know. They tell me they'll handle it. So I send a 3 paragraph long message to my mentee to let them know about the scheduling mistake and to let them know I'll keep them posted on what management wants us to do about it. I deal with customers all morning, not my favorite activity. 9:50 AM rolls around. It turns to 10. I never get a message back. I reach out to management again. Oh no! My mentee called in sick! I hope she's okay, I really do, but now I have to take calls all morning. I end up having 4 escalations (my grand total so far is 7). One was a man who was HEATED about me not being able to find his dishwasher. It wasn't even my company's dishwasher. It was a competitor. So that's fun.

So I get off work and decide to be a good bean and work on my school stuff. I was supposed to submit an essay on Sunday but, because we changed the times of the world (Daylight Savings ended or whatever), I ended up not doing the essay because I slept in and just wasn't having a good time.

I'm supposed to have 2 days after the due date, with -10 points being taken off every day I'm late. I accept that. I shouldn't get an A if it's late. Except for my professor, who I already didn't like, closed the essay portal at 10 AM and gave me a 0. ((I didn't like him because when I sent a 5 paragraph long email about my disability and how it would affect my school work he literally replied back with two sentences. Thanks for letting him know, and nice to meet me.))

So I now have a 25 in the class. A 5 week class, where getting even one 0 fucks you for the rest of the class.

I do my Wednesday homework and 2/3rds of my assigned reading. Note, while I can write okay, I'm Dyslexic As Shit when it comes to reading. I've got the zoom on 200% to try and read the text and, while that makes it easier, it does nothing for the words and letters using the paragraphs as their personal swimming pool. The point is, pretty sure I retained only 25% of what I was reading.

Now for the Fun Part. I have chocolate in my house for the first time in months. I Splurged and decided to get something nice. I've been mixing it with my oatmeal so that I reward myself for eating breakfast. It's for Breakfast Only, because I only have a little of it.

I decide, you know what? I've had a mad day. I deserve a treat. I'm going to make some chocolate and peanut butter oatmeal at 9:30 PM and stay up until 11 PM so I can watch a video on the Omegaverse Lawsuits. ((I loved learning about them, love the YouTuber, and had a good time. Warning if you're going to watch, there's a LOT of sexual stuff. Click on the link if you want to learn more.))

So, to recap before the ending, I burned the shit out of my breakfast, had to do what I hate the most about my job because my mentee didn't show, and Had A Problem with my professor.

Okay. So. I have two culinary degrees. I should be able to handle *oatmeal*. I get ready to make it. I turn my burner a little higher than normal so it'll cook faster.

And it catches fire.

Apparently, I did not clean off all of the caramel from yesterday morning's adventure and it caught fire. A little flame at first, so I try to blow it out like a Smart Woman, then it engulfed the whole burner and my eyebrows thank me for remembering to use salt to put out kitchen fires.

((Little things that didn't deserve their own paragraphs. My cats knocked down and snapped one of my favorite plants because they're monsters who steal as much joy as they give. I also didn't get to write for my NaNoWriMo prompts, take my walk, or do my workout because I chose to do my school work instead.)

So that was my day!

[autisticandroids]

ok so. start with self promo. here's the two amv rec things i've done already, and here's my own amv tag. like my fic rec list it's a permanent work in progress.

cas/deancas vids that make you peel your skin off

mr perfectly fine - this one is insane. very upsetting just how i like it.

godstiel - oh ana - there are no words for how obsessed i am with this video. when i first saw it i just watched it over and over feeling nauseous for like. a week.

the end - shh my dog is sleeping - technically this is like. a full retelling of 5x04 but it is very clearly cas pov. i'm obsessed with it. it singlehandedly rekindled my obsessed with 5x04. everyboy watch it. also i wrote an essay and a half about it.

grace kelly

strawberry blond - yeah yeah yeah yeah. whatever. we've all been there (kneeling on the ground at four in the afternoon in the middle of our neighborhoods openly weeping due to the supernatural emotion).

godstiel dr. horrible

hindsight - this one is. oh boy. this one is rough. massive trigger warning, i really really don't recommend this one if you're feeling at all fragile.

i'll be good

cas/deancas vids that don't make you peel your skin off

cas & ruby - gennifer flowers - this is probably the amv i have watched the most times in my life, any year, any fandom. i am obsessed with it i think about it every day. i kind of wrote an essay about it. singlehandedly made me reevaluate my stance on ruby. the way it genders cas makes electricity shoot through my body. please watch it.

godstiel - hereditary soundtrack - this shit is bananas everyone look at it

share your address - this one is SO sweet and SO well edited and i think about it all the time.

mr. hopalong heartbreak - OBSESSED with this one. so long from your dedicated, dominated pal!

don't blame me

out of touch angel of thursday

body

god, it's brutal out here

i love how you love me

pink trenchcoat bubblegum bitch

cool for the summer

9x09 aescam - not exactly a cas vid but very much a cas vid also i'm obsessed with it

deancas + violence

and i knew he loved me - this one makes me so insane. i cajoled leo into posting it because they were concerned about the dark nature of the Themes but it's literally like. foundational. i think about it every day.

one step forward three steps back

you can watch me corrode like a beast in repose

videos that cause one to experience an Emotion about jack

tell me everything is wonderful now

the gambler

wife

reforming the afterlife sitcom - this one even makes me experience a POSITIVE emotion

other characters/ships

sam - no hell - insane amv experience. op is so talented and also i'm obsessed w the song.

milflord inclinations - KETCH FANCAM KETCH FANCAM KETCH FANCAM.

deanvictor - this vid is SOOOOO sexy

megstiel - love at first sight

alienate my friends - dean

nobody - dean

siblings - angel tfw

get along - deancasbenny

vienna - dean

a walking study in demonology - ruby. obsessed specifically with the fact that op has also used this song to make a deancas amv.

DONTTRUSTME - ruby

rufus fancam

crowley's mom has got it goin on

drowley - girlfriend

linda tran - milf $

ambriel fancam - VERY weird i'm a huge fan

spn in general

spn angels - runs in the family - the man the myth the legend. it's as good as everybody says.

eleanor rigby angels

dear god

they're killing children over there

deaths amv - EDIT: op somehow obliterated that one but here's a youtube link.

supernatural - me! - ERIC KRIPKE SHOT DEAD IN THE STREET.

meet me tonight in atlantic city

videos that are not amvs but are nonetheless fascinating video edits

stackednatural - obsessed with this one. a new artform.

then he kissed me - i am obsessed with this one to an unhealthy degree. i wrote two thousand words about it.

well respected man

look what you made me do

soulfisting

dean is on the pole

deanketch drinking montage clip

two trucks

i should do amv recs also

[actuallyadhd]

Let me preface this with saying that this isn't aimed at anyone in particular. You've had a lot of people sending in asks that talks about their symptoms not harming their school work and such. I test above average intelligence and (I have combined type and) I've struggled with school, would you mind sharing how your diagnosis did affect your lives negatively, but not your school work or grades? Because that's been a hard one for me to wrap my head around. Greatly appreciate it!

This turned into A Very Long Post in which Becca and J Both Wrote Essays, so I put in a Read More.

It’s been over a year now since I got my diagnosis, and to be honest I’m still not sure how much of my life has been affected by having ADHD. It’s a debate of “is this because of my ADHD or is it just how I am? But am I the way I am because of my ADHD? Is there a difference?” I get confused a lot, until I decide to just let it go. There are some things I can think of that are pretty obviously connected to my ADHD.

A huge thing for me is missing deadlines. There are so many things I never even got the chance to try because I missed the deadline for applying, just because I always procrastinate until the very last minute. It’s impacted me pretty negatively, and I’m still working on dealing with knowing I missed so many opportunities just because I couldn’t get started, even though I had more than enough time. 

ADHD has also had some not-so-fun consequences for me socially. As a kid I had a hard time filtering things and I tended to be a little bossy and pushy. A lot of the time I said things without thinking or because I impulsively thought it was funny, which often ended up hurting others, which lead to most of my classmates not quite liking me so much. It makes sense now, but it still kind of messed me up. 

I also run into some difficulties at home. My room has never not been messy; at this point I consider being able to see 30% of the floor a good thing. I’m always losing things I was just holding (yesterday I spent over 20 minutes looking for my water bottle, only to find it in my wardrobe). I’m terrible at grocery shopping and keeping a somewhat healthy eating schedule. My friends often ask me how I even survive, and to be honest I wonder the same thing. 

I could probably write a book about all the ways ADHD has affected all parts of life without even getting into school. Exactly what each ADHDer struggles with is unique to them, and even if many of us deal with similar things, it’s different because everyone’s life is different. 

-Becca

I have Combined type and test above average IQ. Specifically regarding school:

I regularly wrote papers/essays the night before the were due.

In-class essays were rarely actually on-topic... actually, same goes for the longer-term assignments.

I would start the year with all As on my report card and drop at least half a letter grade each reporting period, because INTERESTING! at the start and boring by the end. Even in classes I really liked, like band and English and French.

I regularly missed the point of things we talked about in class, assuming I registered what the topic even was.

Basically, I did quite well in elementary school because I hyperfocused on reading and read all the textbooks in the first week of class, retained it, and could regurgitate it in testing situations. It was similar in high school, but it was harder to perform as well then because you need more executive functioning for that level of schooling. I graduated university with my BMus in Composition with a GPA of 2.67 or something. It should have been higher, but all of the things that caused issues in high school were issues in university. Studying wasn’t something I knew how to do. My auditory attention problems did me zero favours in music history class. I couldn’t get through the dense text books we were supposed to read for seminars and stuff. I did well with my composition classes and my senior project because we had to write things every week and I had to show progress to my advisor every week, plus I really liked writing music so I would get into it (I could also compose on the computer and that’s a Thing for me) and do my work early.

I later completed the coursework for a psych degree, and that went well because I was careful about what courses I took. I stuck to things I was really really interested in. But I flunked out of my music therapy degree after one semester because by then I was also dealing with undiagnosed depression (my ADHD wasn’t diagnosed for another four years after I quit the music therapy degree). I wasn’t able to get things done, I was having to do things---like play the piano---that I simply wasn’t able to do well at all, I had a lot of other stressors (like money problems and being very isolated in a new city), I kept misunderstanding assignments... it was a disaster.

I’m now doing a publishing certificate through distance education. I am doing one course at a time. I note all assignment due dates at the start of the course. I add course readings and so on to my to-do list. I’m doing really well because I’m working within my abilities and while it’s stretching me because I’m learning new things, it’s not impossible because I am careful to check in about what assignments really are supposed to be and because I have figured out what I need and make sure I get it.

In the rest of my life? Well.

Socially, I am introverted and I am also shy. I have some social anxiety because of my impulsive symptoms, so I tend to clam up because I’m scared I’ll say the wrong thing. (This happens a lot actually.) It’s hard for me to make friends because of this kind of thing, but also I miss social cues and I don’t always understand what’s going on because I fade in and out without meaning to (because inattentive symptoms).

As for my home life, my house is a disaster. It is really really messy and disorganized and I cannot for the life of me figure out how to fix it. I have read all the books. I have tried all the systems. It just does not compute. A housekeeper is the one thing I wish we could afford to have, because it is just not something I am good at. At all.

Career? I was always late when I worked outside the home. I miss deadlines often. I was bad at expressing myself so people would think I was being condescending when I was trying to be understanding. If I didn’t write stuff down I would forget instructions.

That’s not everything, it’s just what I can think of right now. But hopefully that sheds some light.

-J

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

COSMIC - S1:E1; Chapter One, The Vanishing of Will Byers - [Pt. 3 - FINAL]

A Will Byers x Gender Neutral!Reader Series

𝘖𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥'𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘧𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘏𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘢 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥.

||𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐕||

The bell rang, signaling the end of class. The boys and I were quick to pack up our belongings before making a beeline for Mr. Clarke's desk, eager to see if the Heathkit came. All the while Mr. Clarke was reminding the already fleeting class of our homework assignment.

"Remember, finish chapter 12 and answer 12.3 on the difference between an experiment and other forms of science investigation. This will be on the test, which will cover chapters 10 through 12. It will be multiple choice with an essay section." His voice faltered towards the end of his sentence as he realized no one had been paying attention.

His head turned to us and he didn't seem too surprised to see us so eager. Mike couldn't take the wait any longer and spoke up on the behalf of all of us.

"So, did it come?"

Mr. Clarke looked solemn. "Sorry, guys," Our heads began to hang in disappointment at his words. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but... It came!"

My face lit up with relief. We followed Mr. Clarke down the halls in anticipation. Mike got to the door first and eagerly threw it open, the rest of us close on his tail.

"Yes!"

Since Mike was the first through the door, naturally he dove for the desk chair as the rest of us scuttled over each other, each of trying to get a close look at it. Lucas and I seemed to have the same idea as we fiddled with the knobs on the Heathkit as Mr. Clarke addressed the new device we were all so eager to see.

"The Heathkit ham shack," The boys and I were in awe.

"Ain't she a beaut?" Mr. Clarke sighed. Dustin then spoke up. "I bet you could talk to New York on this thing."

"Think bigger." Said Mr. Clarke. I rose my eyebrow and looked to my teacher as I questioned, "California?"

"Bigger." 'No way.'

"Australia?" Mike pressed. We all turned out heads hopefully to Mr. Clarke as he responded with a smile and the shake of his head. We all exclaimed.

"Oh man," Lucas chuckled in excitement. "When Will sees this, he's totally gonna blow his shit." My smile faltered at the mention of Will, as Mr. Clarke scolds Lucas for his foul language. Lucas apologized turning back to the Heathkit, and I shake my head slightly trying to get my mind off of Will.

Lucas seems to have found the right settings on the dials based on the high pitch frequencies coming out of the Heathkit. Mike has the headphones on and begins to speak into the mic in an Australian accent.

"'Ello, this is Mike Wheela', president of Hawkins Middle AV Club."

Dustin then practically ripped the headphones off of Mike's head, a big goofy grin on his face as he placed them on his head. Mike was in a fit of giggles as he spoke. "What are you doing?" Dustin proceeded to do the exact same thing as Mike just moments ago.

"'Ello, this is Dustin, and this is the secretary and treasurer of Hawkins Middle AV Club. Do you eat kangaroos for breakfast?" I giggle, shaking my head thinking about the poor confused soul who is stuck listening to the boys ramble on. As Lucas grabs for the headphones, I turn around so I'm facing Mr. Clarke, and I give a polite, yet warm smile. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome, Y/n," He returned the smile, seeming appreciative of the fact that at least one of us said 'Thank you'. He has always been a great teacher, and I don't think anybody ever really appreciates or even thanks him very much. I can't imagine how frustrating it can be as a teacher. I laugh to myself at the sight of my friends playfully fighting over who gets to use it next, when our fun gets cut short at the sound of a knock on the door. We all turn our heads to see the Principle walk in, a couple of men behind him.

"Sorry to interrupt, but, uh, may I borrow Y/n, Michael, Lucas, and Dustin?" To say my stomach dropped would be an understatement as I got a better look at the men out in the hallway and realized it was the Chief and one of his officers.

My mouth ran dry.

'Will.'

The four of were seated on the couch in the Principal's office, Chief Hopper, and officer Callahan - I believe his name was - seated in chairs opposite us. I was seated between Mike and Dustin, I kept my mouth shut unless told otherwise, and my hands have woven together in my lap, much too afraid to do otherwise. The boys, on the other hand, were freaking out and all trying to speak at once. I tried nudging them warningly with my elbows but they just ignored me. It seemed I had made the right choice in being quiet, as Hopper seemed to have gotten impatient almost immediately.

"Okay, okay, okay. One at a time all right? You." He points Mike. Mike shakes his head. "You said he takes what?"

"Mirkwood."

"Mirkwood." His face scrunched up in confusion.

"Yes," I croaked involuntarily, wanting to explain to him that it is just our name for road.

"Have you ever heard of Mirkwood?" He turned to the officer.

"I have not. That sounds made up to me." The officer replied. This timid, awkward man gave me the impression he was more of a 'Yes-man' and knew nothing about what he was doing.

"No, it's from Lord of the Rings."

'Oh, here we go.' I think to myself, sighing.

"Well, The Hobbit."

Mike and I look at each other, knowing what's happening.

"It doesn't matter." Lucas retorted.

"Knock it off!" I warn, trying my best to throw my whisper across the couch without drawing attention to myself.

"He asked!" Dustin nearly shouted.

"Guys!" I hissed.

"'He asked'" Lucas mimicking Dustin, not even listening to me.

I looked over at Mike for help but he is already checked out.

They continue talking over each other in a childish manner and the chief leans forward trying to silence them.

"Hey, hey, hey!" They quieted down finally. "What'd I just say? One at a damn time. You." He nodded to me. He seemed to tolerate just Mike and me.

"Mirkwood, as Mike was saying. It is a real road. It's just the name that's made up, it's what we call it. It's where Cornwallis and Kerley meet." I finish.

He seems satisfied, finally having a straightforward answer. He leans back in his chair, talking now to Callahan.

"Yeah, all right, I think I know that—"

"We can show you, if you want." Mike offered hopefully, cutting the chief off mid-sentence.

"I said that I know it!"

"We can help look."

"Yeah" Dustin added hopefully.

"No."

And just like that, the boys begin to talk over each other once again. Knowing better than to waste my breath trying to shut them up, I sit back once again, hands in my lap waiting for the Chief to continue.

"No," He says loud enough to quiet the boys. "After school, you are to all go home. Immediately. That means no biking around looking for your friend, no investigating, no nonsense. This isn't some Lord of the Rings book."

"The Hobbit."

"Shut up!" Lucas gave Dustin a swat on the arm.

Dustin reached over and hit Lucas back, knocking me and Mike back in the process. I roll my eyes in annoyance, and fight every urge I have not to shout at them.

"Hey!"

Mike finally snaps. "Stop it!"

They continue hitting each other and Hopper finally leans over and says quietly, in an irritated tone. "Do I make myself clear?"

I was the only one paying attention so based on his tired, lowered voice and his eyes on me, I could tell he was just talking to me at this point.

I shook my head. "Yes," I mutter.

He nodded his head at me in thanks. All the while, the boys were still bickering. Hopper's gaze landed on the boys, and he stood up and walked forward towards us. The way his tall frame towered over us was overwhelming, and enough to shut the boys up. In a deep, intimidating voice, he repeated his words, slowly.

"Do I make myself... clear?" The boys nod their heads in fear, their necks craning up to meet his eyes.

"Yes, sir."

"Yeah."

"Yes."

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

I've been laying in my bed, staring at the ceiling for about thirty minutes, give or take a few. I had managed to do all of my school work, including my project that wasn't due for another week and a half, read three books — granted, they were fairly short — and I was still left with nothing to do but worry about Will. The fact that I'm not allowed to help is driving me crazy, even though I keep trying to tell myself the adults are better equipped to deal with this stuff. My thoughts are interrupted by the crackling of the walkie-talkie that was sitting on my dresser. Since our mom couldn't afford two walkie-talkies, Dustin and I share one. I usually have it though so I can talk to Will.

The voice coming through sounded like Mike. Rather than getting my hopes up I just decided to stay put, staring at my ceiling, listening in.

"Lucas, do you copy? It's Mike. Lucas? Over."

"Hey, it's Lucas."

"I know it's you. And say 'over' when you're done talking so I know when you're done. Over." I roll my eyes and smile.

"I'm done. Over." I chuckle at this.

"I'm worried about Will. Over." My smile quickly falls.

I can hear Lucas sigh. "Yeah. This is crazy. Over."

"I was thinking..." Now I was really paying attention. "Will could've cast Protection last night, but he didn't. He cast fireball. Over." I sat up slowly, my eyebrows furrowed at the walkie.

"What's your point? Over."

"My point is... he could've played it safe, but he didn't. He put himself in danger to help the party. Over." A bittersweet smile flutters across my face briefly at this.

"Meet me in ten. Over and out."

'To hell with adults.' I tell myself. I leap off my bed and grab the walkie, knowing they'll still be able to hear me.

"Forgetting someone? Over."

"Y/n? Over." It was Mike.

"Don't worry, I'll let Dustin know. Over and out."

I retract the walkie before shoving it into my bag and heading for Dustin's room.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

Once I had caught Dustin up on everything, the four of us had met up and we are now currently riding down Mirkwood. The thought of my best friend disappearing right here, exactly 24 hours ago was enough to give me chills.

"Ah, man. This is it." Lucas broke the silence as we approached the barrier closing off the path where his bike was supposedly found. We all came to a stop.

For a brief moment, the woods were lit up by lightning in the distance as thunder bellowed across the sky. Dustin looked up at the blanket of clouds above the trees, his voice shaking.

"Hey, guys. You feel that?" He was obviously referring to the rain that fell on his face. I roll my eyes. "I think maybe we should go back."

"No!" Mike and I said simultaneously.

"We're not going back. Just stay close." Mike and Lucas continued on into woods. I was eager to follow them but not without trying to reassure my brother.

"Dustin, he's right. Look, I know you're scared right now, okay? I'm scared too, but can you even imagine how scared Will must be? We have to do this. For Will." I didn't wait for a reply and ran to catch up with Mike and Lucas.

Knowing my brother, he would rather stay in a group than split up. Sure enough, he gave in.

"Hey, guys, wait up!" He said, dropping his bike. "Wait up!"

We started walking again, and as we did it I could feel the rain start to soak my neck and shoulders. I pulled my hood up over my head, turning on my flashlight and set off into the night, eager to find my friend.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

The thunder rumbled, and as we ventured deeper into the forest I could feel the light drizzle of rain evolving into a steady downpour.

"WILL!"

"WILL!" I cried.

"Byers!" Lucas yelled.

Dustin tried a different approach. "I've got your X-Men 134!"

Our flashlights were hardly making a difference at this point. Dustin spoke up again. "Guys, I really think we should turn back."

"Seriously, Dustin?" Lucas exclaimed. "You wanna be a baby, then go home already!"

"I'm just being realistic Lucas!"

"No, you're just being a big sissy."

"Did you ever think Will went missing because he ran into something bad? And we're going to the exact same spot where he was last seen? And we have no weapons or anything?"

I start to slow down once I heard something in the bushes.

"Dustin, shut up." Mike spoke up.

'Okay, thankfully, Mike must have heard it too.'

"I'm just saying, does that seem smart to you?"

"Dustin!" I snap. "Zip it!"

Now the rustling was loud and clear.

"Did you guys hear that?" Mike asks.

I just shake my head, looking around for the source of the noise. The rustling is louder than ever and we all turn in the direction it came from. All our flashlights pointed in that direction. Then we heard it again. It was right behind us. We whipped around to find a girl, with a buzz cut, wearing nothing but 'Benny's Burgers' T-shirt. We all stood there, mouths agape at this girl, shivering and cowering in fear.

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