#i've been watching heist movies again

[frommybookbook]

Heist Movies and the Hays Code

The other night, some friends and I watched the incredible Star Trek: Deep Space Nine episode "Badda Bing, Badda Bang", which is a loving pastiche of the heist film. As we were watching, we all noticed how old the actor playing the character of Mr. Zeemo was and I knew there had to be an Easter egg reason for it. After looking him up, I realized he was Marc Lawrence, who appeared in The Asphalt Jungle (1950), largely considered to be the first true heist film (though there are a couple from the 40s, that I've also seen, that are sort of proto-heists).

I decided to watch Asphalt this weekend, since I'd never seen it and it'd been sitting in my queue for ages. It was fine, definitely a first pancake situation, but now I can't stop thinking about the evolution of the heist film and the way the Hays Code shaped its early days and how it was allowed to shift and evolved after the code was lifted.

The earliest heist films were made under the Code. And not only under the Code, but at the Code's peak in the late '40s/early '50s. You watch these movies and you know from the very beginning that no one in our gang of misfits is going to succeed. The rules of the Code and its insistence that crime and depravity and bad morals can't pay means all of them will either be dead or in jail by the time the closing credits role. It doesn't matter how much we love our protagonists, it doesn't matter what their motivations are for participating in the heist, they are criminals and they must pay. They'll never see a dime of their money and all their efforts will be in vain.

Contrast this with the modern heist movie: the lovable rogues always beat the house. George Clooney and Brad Pitt and their buddies walk away with their millions. Sisko and his crew trick Frankie Eyes and save Vic's. Jason Statham in every Jason Statham movie gets his cash and lives to steal another day.

A lot of what I've read about the evolution of the heist movie and the role the Code plays in it focuses on the fact that once the code was lifted, these movies became more violent and graphic and leaned hard into that. And I'm sure that's true, but that was true of all movies. The 70s and the 80s in particular really exemplify the shock value of violence and sex in a post-Code Hollywood. But nothing I've seen talks about how the dissolution of the Code changed how audiences are allowed to see the thieves in a heist movie. Without the draconian constraints of the Code, we're allowed to root for the thieves, to be on their side, and to see them "win" in the end and make off with their bounty.

Even in the rare modern heist where the hero protagonist doesn't win—he (because it's almost always a he) doesn't get the money or he does get caught and goes to jail—it's always inferred that this is just a temporary setback. Next time, he'll be smarter and better and he'll win. He's alive and prison is just a small blip on the timeline, he'll be back (probably in 17 sequels) and the next time he'll do the job to beat all jobs. Heist movies of the Code era rarely see the thieves end the movie alive and when they do, they're behind bars with no hope of release or escape. The message that crime doesn't pay is never in question.

Yes, violence and sex have become more prevalent in heist movies in the post-Code era, but I think the greatest change the freedom of production without the Code brought to heist movies is that now, the house can lose.

[forthegothicheroine]

I've made a post about great lesser-known noirs, but it occurs to me that some of you might not be familiar with the classics, and might want to know where to start. This is a ridiculously short list- I have a million more to talk about- but here are some of the big stars of the genre.

The Maltese Falcon: Sam Spade, a clever but callous private detective, gets wrapped up in intrigue relating to an artifact that is functionally cursed. If he's an unscrupulous character, just wait until you meet everyone else. The whole damn cast is electrifying, lending charm and cruelty in equal measure.

The Big Sleep: Philip Marlowe, a kinder and more poetic detective for Humphrey Bogart to play than Spade, is called upon to deal with a wealthy, dysfunctional family, and it keeps on getting weirder from there. Is the sharp-tongued Vivian Sternwood the femme fatale she seems, or is she just another person trying to find the right thing to do in desperate circumstances? And will she and Marlowe keep their hands off each other until the plot has had its last twist?

Double Indemnity: Rich housewife Phyllis Dietrichson and sleazy insurance agent Walter Neff are, by their own admission, rotten people. It's only natural that they should plot a murder together, and that they should turn on each other the very second things go wrong. Every single domestic murder movie since 1944 has ripped this off.

Kiss Me Deadly: This is nominally an adaptation of a Mike Hammer story. Screenwriter Bezzerides hated Mike Hammer. As depicted here, he is one of the worst people in the world. Depending on the cut of the film you see, he may inadvertently cause the nuclear apocalypse. (For once, the theatrical cut is darker.)

Sweet Smell of Success: Cruel, all-powerful columnist JJ Hunsecker wants his sister's boyfriend out of the way (for reasons that are, um, ambiguous.) To accomplish this, he enlists the biggest weasel in New York, Sidney Falco, and the two completely deserve each other as they spend the rest of the movie trading elaborate insults. Popular on tumblr for its dialogue and chemistry between the leads.

Sunset Boulevard: Broke screenwriter Joe Gillis thinks he can con a has-been into hiring him as a script doctor, and that's the last free decision he ever gets to make. From then on, his life is in the hands of Norma Desmond, silent film starlet turned crazed recluse, terrifying yet intensely pitiable. This is as much gothic horror as noir.

Ace in the Hole: The story of a man trapped in a cave is turning out to be a big hit in the newspaper, and if the publicity will make a reporter's career, then what's the harm in delaying rescue just for a little while? This is as vicious as noir gets, but damn it, you've just got to see what happens next. (Watch Jacob Geller's video Fear of the Depths after this.)

Sorry Wrong Number: Of all the films on this list, this is the one that really scared me. In the days of switchboards, a rich hypocondriac woman is connected to the wrong phone line and overhears a murder being planned. It doesn't take her long to figure out she's the intended victim, and each call she makes or recieves makes the situation darker. But how can she escape her fate if she can't- or won't leave her bed?

The Asphalt Jungle: The heist movie. Maybe the only heist movie ever made. Every line is quotable. Every member of the team is an unforgettable personality. When things go wrong, they go horribly wrong. One minute you're laughing, and the next minute you think you'll never laugh again.

Gun Crazy: Laurie and Bart, two practiced sharpshooters, are perhaps the most perfect match in all of noir- and that's a bad thing. When one half of the duo gets a criminal idea in their head, the other can't say no. When the opportunity to ditch her man like a sap comes up, the femme fatale throws it away to be doomed at his side. He fell in love with her when she first aimed a gun at him. Quentin Tarantino kissed star Peggy Cummins's feet at a showing of the film, and I hope she kicked him in the head.

Laura: Everyone was in love with Laura Hunt, and somebody killed her- or did they? Did they get the right person? Is the cop on the case in love with a dead woman? Was her columnist mentor just her gay best friend, or was there something darker beneath that facade? And what would Laura think of all this? A big inspiration on Twin Peaks.

In a Lonely Place: Bogart isn't at all heroic here, as a screenwriter with a drinking habit and a violent temper. He's obviously a bad idea to date, but just how bad an idea? He's not the type of guy who'd kill a woman, is he? Bogart and Gloria Holden give perhaps their best performances here, and they'll wound your soul.

Touch of Evil: A Mexican cop (played, unfortunately, by Charlton Heston) finds out a nasty secret about the big hero cop Hank Quinlan: he's framed the culprit in most of his cases. Not because he's crooked, but because his intuition tells him they're guilty. Director Orson Welles as Quinlan is frightening, grotesque, and a little bit tragic in what some consider the last classic noir.

The Killers: The first twenty minutes or so are an adaptation of a Hemingway story, where out of town hitmen gun down a man so depressed he won't even bother to run from them. The rest of the film is an investigation into how he got that way. It had something to do with a radiant gangster's girl, and something to do with a few botched crimes. Sometimes a man can die before the bullets even touch him.

The Third Man: Everybody is lying about the whereabouts of an American expatriate named Harry when his friend comes looking. Did they do something to him? Or, more frightening still, is he the one who's been doing things to other people? Orson Welles is a more charming monster than he was in Touch of Evil; the light and shadows on his face cast him as a vampire, while his fingers sticking up through the sewer grate look like something terrifying emerging from the earth.

[vaperarmand]

Could you spare me some yuri horror/thriller films or shows? Bonus points if there's a dom butch. I've already seen Mulholland drive, The Handmaiden and Killing Eve, I want more 🥺

oh absolutely i can ���

love lies bleeding (2024): boxing gym. crime family. bodybuilding. their form of foreplay is injecting each other with steroids. a little bit surreal also? save me dom butch katy o’brien. SAVE MEEEEEE.

drive away dolls (2024): this one is firmly in the comedy genre more than it is anything else, but it’s still a great action/adventure movie imo. a little bit of coming of age, a little bit road trip, a little bit heist. so fucking funny. listened to linda rondstat’s version of blue bayou a lot because of this movie.

kajillionaire (2020): also not quite a thriller in the traditional sense, but heist all the way. it’s been a long time since i’ve seen this one, but it’s really cinematically beautiful and the family themes are like. woof. great performances all around + i love you old dolio.

bound (1996): you HAVE to see bound. HAVE TO. classic butch4femme. classic crime movie. so hot it’s unreal. PLEASE WATCH BOUND. also corky save me.

dead ringers miniseries (2023): probably my personal favorite thing on this list actually. truly some freak shit happening over there. takes the original film and expands on the horrors of pregnancy and motherhood in a way that makes you go. fuuuuuck. rachel weisz plays terminally codependent twins and theres hot girl on girl action with an actress as well. i will say again that there is some freak shit happening over there. and it’s really awesome.

the favourite (2018): also been a long time since i’ve seen this one but i liked it a lot. dark in the way yorgos lanthimos movies are dark (though not as dark as some of his others), good in the way yorgos lanthimos movies are good. two women fight for the affection and adoration of their queen. and rachel weisz is gay again!

i will lastly link this letterboxd list which has a bunch more movies about gay crime that i haven’t seen but now want to check out!!!

[karinamay]

Holiday shout outs - KarinaMay's fic recs of 2024

The year is almost out, and with the holidays coming up I hope we can all find some time to cozy up with a hot drink and a good fic. In case you're unsure what to read next, I've compiled a list of my absolute favourites of the year. (Sorted by fandom for your convenience.)

Baldur's Gate 3

Magistrate's Advocate by @cinnamontails-ff

An Astarion/female OC fic that absolutely blew me away. The romance between Astarion and Zoroya is a beautiful, delicate tale of two people growing up together, growing apart, and finding each other again. Beyond that, the fic takes magistrate!Astarion to court for some delicious intrigue that left me on the edge of my seat. Not to mention that Zoraya is just one of my favourite OC's in fiction. 11/10, I kicked my feet, I cried, I was cackling by the time someone did actually yell "objection!".

Portrait of the pale elf by @larvasmoon

Another Astarion/female OC fic - with a twist. Set post the game narrative, tailor!Astarion meets a painter Selene and they get twisted up in a very complicated dark romance. I'm always enchanted by larvasmoon's writing. This fic is an absolute must-read for anyone who loves the romantics and gothic horror/romance stories. Vibes range from "Desperate Romantics" to "Crimson Peak". I'm absolutely obsessed with this one.

A Tale of Fools and Tricksters by @obsessedwhyyes

Continuing on the Astarion/female OC trend, this fic by obsessedwhyyes is, in her own words, a "mystic circus AU", which I didn't know was something I needed until I read it. Slightly spooky vibes as well, and very whimsical, featuring Astarion as the ringmaster of a travelling circus that makes wishes come true. Reminds me of "Alice in Wonderland" as well as "Labyrinth".

Rings of Power

In which we explore my unwavering love for modern AUs

ode to a nightingale by SephySpector

Galadriel/Halbrand. As of writing this, I haven't yet caught up with the final few chapters, but I have been *screaming* about this one on the inside. Modern/kind of college AU that happens to actually be set around Christmas, so it's perfect for this time of year. "The sluttiest thing a man can do is read poetry" made into a fic and let me tell you. Yes. Yes it is.

This is hell, and he is the devil by @lisenberry

Galadriel/Halbrand. Modern AU, Gal is a student/waitress, Halbrand a chef in the restaurant she works at. Now this one is very spicy. I think I read the entire thing in two days, I absolutely loved it. Especially recommend for anyone who's worked in a restaurant before. Definitely one for the dom/sub enjoyers out there.

The Venus of Valinor by @thecoziestbean

Galadriel/Halbrand. Modern AU, Gal gets fired from an art auction house, Hal is a thief breaking into her family home. Due to some complicated circumstances in Gal's family history, she and Hal end up a somewhat reluctant art heist team. The way this fic combines an intriguing, fast-paced heist story with a hot-as-heck romance is masterful, honestly. It reads like watching a movie.

Dragon Age: The Veilguard

How to Steal a Crow in Ten Weeks by queenofseventeen

Lucanis/Rook. Low stakes AU in which things in Veilguard aren't as bad. Focusses on the Crows as a whole, with the Lucanis romance, but also centered around the relationship between Rook and Viago. As of me writing this, just the first chapter is up, but I know this author, and I promise their work is worth the read and the wait. Their writing is fast-paced, innovative and overall just a delicious read.

[mncxbe]

Could you please write a Poe x f!reader x ranpo? Can be all together or separate, can it be either with a insecure reader or just them cuddling together?

This was so cute istg I decided to write both the separate and together ^^ Hope you like it. Sidenote the story I referred to in Poe's part is "The Murders in the Rue Morgue". y'all should read it it's really cool♡

Sun and moon ☽𖤓

𝑹𝒂𝒏𝒑𝒐, 𝑷𝒐𝒆 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: fluff♡/ light angst to set the scene

°☆○

𝑹𝒂𝒏𝒑𝒐

It's been a few months since you started going out with the world's greatest detective. You got acquainted with him through Poe, a common friend, and instantly hit it off. And how could you not like him? He was fun to be around, highly intelligent and above all, a good person.

You felt such great pride whenever you saw his smiling face on one of the billboards that adorned the streets of Yokohama; which announced that once again he had helped prevent a bombing, the kidnapping of an important political figure or a heist.

Although he was usually busy with cases until late in the evening, when he came home he was energetic and cheerful. Your boyfriend always inquired about your day and actively listened to what you were telling him, showering you with sweet kisses and hugs whenever you were upset or stressed.

And yet, you failed to see what he saw in you. What could possibly be there to like about a wannabe writer who couldn't even find a part time job at a café? With each week that passed the feeling of doubt was growing stronger and you were becoming increasingly insecure about your relationship.

Of course, your observant boyfriend could tell something was wrong but he couldn't figure out what exactly it was. So one day he simply decided to ask you.

"Hey, Y/N. Can I ask you something?"

You were currently watching a sappy movie with him and lounging on your cushioned couch; his head rested in your lap as you gently ran his fingers through his coffee-coloured hair.

"Yes of course, dear. What is it?" you replied without averting your eyes from the TV.

"I was wondering if there's anything bothering you lately. You seem a bit tense and distracted."

His sudden question took you by surprise and you instinctively squeezed your thighs together.

"No, not at all. I'm good" you lied, but your attemps to conceal the truth were futile. Ranpo could tell that you were hiding something from him.

"Sugar" he spoke again as he straightened himself "Please talk to me. I don't like seeing you like this." There was nothing you could say so you remained quiet, gaze fixated on the glowing screen.

As a response to your avoidance, Ranpo's shoulders slouched "Did I do something to upset you, love? If I did I'm sorry please talk to me."

That was all it took to make you face him. Hurriedly taking his hands in yours, you finally looked him in the eyes. "No, dear. You didn't do anything wrong, I promise."

"Then why don't you spend as much time with me anymore? I just can't figure out why you're so distant all of a sudden. Do I not make you happy anymore?"

Your heart shattered at the sound of his words. His voice, although calm, was laced with frustration and doubt and you felt your eyes and neck burning.

"Baby no wait don't say that. I love you a lot and you make me very happy." you babbled out, cupping his cheek with a trembling hand.

"Then what is it?"

"I guess I'm a bit insecure" you finally confessed in a cracking voice "I don't understand why you like me so much. You're so amazing and I'm just, well... me."

"Oh sugar. How could you say something like that?" Ranpo's gaze softened as he pulled you into a tight hug. His hands caressed your back as he continued speaking. "You're the most caring and creative person I've ever met. I love your kindness and how supportive you are and I'm so lucky to have you in my life so please, don't say such things about yourself, okay? I love you."

You began sobbing, crystal tears damping the front of his shirt. "I'm sorry, Ranpo." you mumbled as you returned the hug.

"It's alright love. No need to apologize." he chuckled, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead. He used his index finger to raise your chin, making you meet his gaze as his thumb gently brushed over your tear stained cheeks. "Hush now don't cry. I don't want to see my pretty girl sad."

You choked back your sobs and pulled him into a kiss, which he gladly returned.

"That's more like it" he smiled lightly as he pulled away, gaining a chuckled from you.

"Thanks for reassuring me, dear. I needed it.". You nesteled against him, placing your head atop of his chest as his lithe fingers lazily interlocked with yours.

"Anytime, sugar cube"

𝑷𝒐𝒆

The silvery glow of the moon glazed the room in a soothing, ethereal light. You gazed at the empty spot next to you, delicate fingers ghosting over the cold bedsheets; from the room next door a soft, scratching sound echoed faintly as Poe's fountain pen's nib scribbled the paper.

You were accustomed to your partner's habit of staying up late at night, working on his novels until the break of dawn, but you still longed for his presence.

"Edgar?" you called out in a sleepy voice "Could you come to bed, please?"

"As soon as I finish this page, my love. I have a few more lines."

You mumbled a quick "a'ight" before closing your eyes; no matter how hard you tried to stay awake, your eyelids felt heavy. One of your arms reached to the other side of the bed and grasped Poe's pillow. You snuggled the soft cushion, relishing your partner's scent.

It seemed like an eternity has passed before your boyfriend finally entered the room. Upon laying his eyes on your sleeping form, a smile rose to his lips.

"My love" he hummed, seating himself on the mattress. "Could I have my pillow back?"

His voice half awakened you from your slumber and you flashed him a warm smile.

"Edgar you're here" you said as you snaked an arm around his waist. Poe took the hint and laid down on his side next to you. You quickly discarded the pillow and pressed your whole body to your partner's, head nesteled in the crook of his neck.

"Don't get too comfortable now. I still have to go take a shower." he said in a silvery voice, trying to push you away but you wouldn't buy it.

Your lips brushed over his sweet spot as you left a trail of feathery kisses along his neck "Please don't go. I missed you love"

Poe sighed loudly and wrapped his arms around your waist, earning a smile from you. "You do know how to get what you want, don't you?" he chuckled, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.

After a couple of minutes he turned to his back and gazed at the ceiling. His face was illuminated by moonlight and the halo of dark curls framing his head made him look like a fallen angel.

"What are you thinking about, love?" you inquired, leaning your head on his chest as your arm lazily wrapped around his torso.

"Just the novel I'm working on. I'm a bit stuck on a part."

"If you want to you can tell me about it. Maybe it helps you organize your ideas better."

"You know what, that could actually help, Y/N"

He started telling you about the protagonists and summed up the novel's plot: it was about a detective who decided to solve a strange case, the gruesome murder of two women in their apartment.

Due to your sleepy state you weren't really paying attention to the narrative; his voice was slowly but surely lulling you to sleep. The steady sound of his heartbeat was the only thing that kept you grounded. But not for too long...

"You still listening, love?" he eventually asked, noticing how you haven't said anything in a while. You gave a small nod, cuddling closer to his side and he immediately knew you were almost asleep.

Poe's heart was literally melting like wax next to a burning flame. He gently caressed your cheek with one hand, tucking a strand of hair behing your ear.

"Goodnight, my darling" he whispered softly as he pulled the blanket over your bodies. "I love you"

𝑹𝒂𝒏𝒑𝒐𝒆

Ranpo and Poe were "rivals", a term the latter liked to use instead of "partners". It was true that at first there had been some tensions between them, but now they worked together on almost every case.

The only thing they still competed for was the title of best boyfriend. Almost each day you returned home from work one of them had a surprise for you; a handwritten love poem from Poe, a glazed chocolate donut or a bouquet of flowers from Ranpo.

"Hey, Y/N. Aren't I the best boyfriend in the world?" asked Ranpo one afternoon as you were lounging about on the sofa. He was leaning against you, head resting on your chest.

"You're good, Ranpo" you replied playfully, deliberately not indulging him.

"I know I'm good" he pressed "But don't you think I'm the best?"

You chuckled lightly, the tips of your fingers gently caressing his arm. "I love you both equally, Ranpo. I can't compare you".

From the other side of the couch Poe groaned: "Hear that, Mr. detective? She loves me as much as she loves you. I consider this a win."

"I still think she likes me better tho" replied Ranpo as he cuddled closer to your chest.

You gave Poe an understanding smile. The novelist was often the one who backed down during these little arguments hence Ranpo was acting so childish.

With a playful curl of your finger you motioned Edgar to come closer to you and he meekly obeyed, a deep shade of pink tinting his cheeks. He carefully wrapped his arm around your shoulders as not to disturb Ranpo and smiled lightly.

"How about we go to dinner tonight. Just us" he proposed, his voice a mere whisper "My treat"

Before you could reply Ranpo's head snapped towards Poe, a smirk dancing on his lips "This attempt to win Y/N heart is futile. I've already foreseen your plan and ordered food at home. It should arrive in half an hour or so."

The novelist grit his teeth but you could see the glimmer of adoration in his silvery eyes. No matter how many times Ranpo intervened with his plans, he still admired his ability to predict his actions.

You burst into a mirthful laughter at the sight of Poe's expression. "God you look like you saw a ghost, love". You swiftly hooked your arms around your partners' necks and pulled them into a tight hug, causing them to yelp.

"You two are something else, you know?" you giggled as you smooched their cheeks, earning a different reaction from each of them: Ranpo smirked, his gaze lingering on your plump lips while Edgar blushed heavily and covered his face with the back of his hand.

Just as the detective was about to initiate another kiss, the sharp buzz of the intercom caught your attention.

"That must be dinner" you chimed, briskly slipping from their embrace. "Be right back, darlings"

After paying the delivery guy you returned to the living room carrying the two plastic bags. A savoury smell came from the unopened boxes, making your mouth water as you carefully placed them all on the wooden table next to the sofa. Ranpo had ordered bonito sushi and pork gyoza for you, some noodles for Poe and sweet curry and donuts for himself.

You ate dinner in silence before going to bed; as usual, Poe was sleeping on his side facing you, his slender fingers lazily interlocked with yours while Ranpo spooned you. You soon fell into a dreamless sleep as the detective chanted sweet nothings in your ear and caressed your waist. You haven't slept this well in a while.

[alessiathepirate]

Ocean's Eleven

CONFIDENCE BOOST: Linus Caldwell x fem!reader

Summary: Rusty left the last advice unfinished, seemingly making Linus both nervous and annoyed. Luckily she's there to help.

Notes: English isn't my first language. I apologize for any mistake I made while I wrote this short story.

After a message reminded me how obsessed I've been with the Ocean's men, I started to rewatch the movies - and it once again gave me some inspiration, ending my writers block. By the time I'm done with the rewatch, hopefully more stories will come :)

Warnings: only a few swear words, but other than that nothing at all

•••

"Where do you put your hands?" both her and Rusty followed Linus' movements with their eyes as he tried to hold the briefcase with both hands. "No good."

She leaned back on the sofa she was sitting on, realizing this won't be a short conversation. She might as well get herself comfortable and watch as Linus learns - it's as entertaining for her as it is annoying and stressful for him. She might as well lean back and enjoy it as long as it's not her turn to move.

"Don't touch your tie. Look at me." Linus did as he was told so. "Okay, I ask you a question 'you have to think of an answer, where do you look?"

Linus looked down. It wasn't the right move.

"No good." Rusty said and for a moment their eyes met - she tilted her head, trying to silently communicate with him like they learned to do so. Don't be that hard on him - her eyes said. "You look down, they know you're lying..." Linus looked up and she smiled - that wasn't right either. "...and up, they know you don't know the truth."

Linus' eyes settled on Rusty once again as he sighed both from the nerves and slight annoyance.

"Don't use seven words when four'll do. Don't shift your weight," Rusty pointed out after Linus did that. "look always at your mark, but don't stare. Be specific but not memorable, be funny but don't make him laugh. He's gotta like you and then forget you the moment you left his side." Rusty's expression changed as he continued: "And for God's sake, whatever you do, don't - under any circumstances-"

"Russ!" Livingston's voice came suddenly from the other room, making all three of them look that way.

"Yeah?" Rusty shouted back.

"Can you take a look at this?"

"Sure!" and just like that he got up and left the room, leaving the unfinished sentence hanging.

Linus looked after him, not being able to decide if he should speak up or not and seemingly he couldn't decide what to say if he speaks up either. His mind was full of the instructions Rusty told him, trying to process them in the remaining minutes and then also remember all of them.

"Don't do what?" the question finally came out in a mixture of confusion, stress and annoyance.

Linus finally fully turned to look at her and she gave him a reassuring smile.

"Don't worry, he went through that with me on my first heist as well."

"And how did it go?" he sounded hopeful.

"It was Danny's plan, how do you think it went?" she looked up at him, testing, seeing what he'll say, seeing where his trust lies.

"Good?" it sounded more as a question than an answer.

She chuckled as she stood up, walking up to him, seeing if everything about his clothes are alright.

"Great." she answered as she adjusted his tie, straightening it. "I even got a necklace on the way out."

Finally, through the mixture of emotions what fell on him after Danny was put in a corner, Linus gave her a weak smile. She returned it, doing her best to boost his confidence.

He didn't really have a reason to worry or have fears about failure. He was good at what he was doing. He could pickpocket anyone easily, without anyone noticing. She saw it with her own eyes, she was there with Danny when he recruited him. And that last pull with the wallet was fantastic - unnoticeable even by her.

"You have nothing to worry about, really. You've got this." she put hands on his shoulders and his eyes followed her movements through the glasses he wore. "You were doing just fine without Rusty's speech. He gives it to everyone, believe me. This is your first heist with them, they'll give you a speech and test how good you are."

"Test?" he questioned.

"Yeah. Don't be surprised when they suddenly pop up somewhere when you're supposed to be alone. At least that's what they did with me."

She let go of him and took a step back, looking at him once again - he looked good and not just as a rookie who worked for the Nevada Gaming Commision, but as Linus himself. He looked cute, especially with those glasses and that tie. She got used to the striped shirts and jackets, but this was something new altogether. And he made it work.

"Alright, 'you want my advice?" she asked, hoping that he does.

He nodded - maybe a bit too quickly. The glasses almost fell off, he had to straighten them.

"Just don't stress it. I know you're good, I saw it with my own eyes and believe me, you wouldn't be here if Danny thought you weren't skilled." he was very close to blushing at the compliment and she almost grinned at that. "All Rusty tried to help you with was your acting, but the only thing that matters is for you to stay calm and in character. And your character has to be pitiful, someone Benedict could walk over, someone who's young and forgettable. You can't be smarter than him, funnier than him or even braver than him. 'You understand?"

He nodded - she continued. "You've got this, I believe in you."

That seemed to do the trick - or a trick at least. What she said made him blush, it was noticeable this time around and even his glasses couldn't hide it.

She took a step toward him again to adjust his glasses even if they couldn't have been any straighter. She felt like she needed that excuse to be closer to him than she was and to save that image of Linus in those clothes, blushing the best she could.

"And what shouldn't I do?" he asked after he swallowed.

"Oh, just don't leave without an excuse and don't leave unfinished sentences hang in the air. If it's a joke it's fine, it'd fit the guy you're playing, but otherwise it's a no." she let her arms fall beside her body, but she didn't take a step back this time. "So, 'everything clear now?"

"Yeah, thanks." it wasn't more than a whisper, but she heard it.

"No problem. You can come to me anytime."

The conversation died down after that, but neither of them moved. She took those short moments to really take a good look at him, at his expressions - at every corner of his face, no matter how small. She couldn't find a single mistake there, not a scar, not a wrinkle she wouldn't like. Nothing was there what could've made him worried. She found him flawless - she found him a sweetheart and a very cute one.

"You're a sweetheart, you know?" she said, saying what she thought out loud - as she noticed Saul on the hallway behind Linus, probably on his way out. They don't have much time left. "The others aren't. They're either assholes sometimes for jokes or they get sloppy - but you're neither of those."

"You're not like them either."

"Hell no, I'm much younger thank you very much." she said jokingly, making him chuckle and with that his nervousness disappeared.

"Yeah, that too."

"See? You have nothing to worry about. You're too loveable to run into any sorts of trouble." she explained with a loving smile. "And I'll be around too."

The clock was ticking - Linus should get going and she should get ready, but the conversation was too interesting to leave it hanging.

"Yeah, you'll be the best thing around."

"Better than those millions underground?" she asked with a giggle, saying it as a joke and nothing more, but at his answer it was her turn to blush.

"Definitely."

She swallowed - all the before-heist confidence disappeared from her and she was back on square one, where Linus was.

"We'll talk after, right?"

She tilted her head at the question, finding it cute - it still kept the blush on her face.

"Of course. You can buy me a coffee from those millions if you want to."

And he wanted to. She could see it on his face, in his eyes and that thought made her heart flutter.

"Right, you should get going." her voice was weaker than usual.

"Yeah."

"I believe in you, Linus."

They didn't kiss - it wasn't the right moment and it would've been too soon for that. But she kissed his cheek for good luck - making him blush once more - before he left.

It was quick, but meaningful and she looked him in the eyes as she pulled back. See you after the heist.

Right as she was on her way to her room to put on the dress she needed for her role, her heart almost jumped out of her chest when she saw Rusty on the small hallway. She looked at him for a second, and after his expression told her everything she had to know, she continued to move.

But as she walked past him she said: "You had a bet going, didn't you?"

"Forty bucks said you'd make the first move."

She stopped and turned to look at him, she smiled even if she was annoyed a little. But then again who could've expected them to not gamble when they're about to rob a casino?

"Fifty-fifty, right?"

"No, you'll only get thirty percent. It was way too cheesy to listen to."

She took the money and pocketed it quickly.

"What do you think?" she asked.

"Danny knew since the beginning." Rusty aswered, leaving her as he walked away.

She stood there, trying to figure out what gave it away to Danny before she even realised that she found Linus cute.

"It was the wallet." she whispered to herself, nodding. "Yeah, it was definitely the pull with the wallet."

[usmsgutterson]

I want a love like the movies- give me a trope/character dynamic from this list, a song (or a specific lyric from a song that you want me to base it off of, or even a poem, anything that is seen as art is acceptable here) and a time of day. I’ll use that to write a fic with a minimum of 1k words. 

kaz brekker with 29 (from the list) anddddd almost by hozier?? idk first song to pop into my head haha

Love- K.B x gn! reader

okay, this is the last of your requests and it's coming out on my official two year fic-iversary! I posted my first ever fic on maliciousbrekker two years ago to the day, and it's been a wonderfully wild ride in things ever since! No regrets with anything I've done here, honestly!

As for requests generally speaking, the goal is to have at least one more coming out over the weekend! My two year anniversary requests are taking precedent right now because I've been demotivated and haven't posted many of them, but after the two year anniversary requests are done, I'll go through my inbox and decide what I want to write vs what I don't and then I'll proceed and hopefully my requests will be open again by the date in my bio!

The prompt you chose was: reader/writer

Fic type- this is fluff!

Warnings-Kaz is probably a little ooc

"You and your books," Kaz observed as he came into your place. You lived in a flat not too far from the Barrel, one that was simultaneously within walking distance of the Crow Club and the Slat as well as Wylan and Jespers place.

You'd bought it to own it with a portion of your money from the ice court, spruced it up to your liking and saved a room to turn into a library. Bookshelves lined the walls, covered in every book you owned and organized to your preference.

You'd bought a desk for Kaz to use, and within it were countless heist plans, countless letters to Nina, Matthias, and Inej, and even a couple of the journals that Kaz had bought two years before but had only begun using in the weeks after the Ice Court job had been completed.

"I have my books and you have your heists, love," you said, shrugging as Kaz sat at the opposite end of the velvety couch you'd kept in the sitting room. "Everyone has their vices."

"How is it?" Kaz asked. You jabbed at each other for your hobbies occasionally, poked fun and delighted in the sounds of scoffs that eventually turned into barely amused laughter, but in the end, you cared about the other persons hobbies, too.

No matter how much you may have poked fun at Kaz and his love for unlined leatherback journals, for the expensive ink he purchased from a Fabrikator near the heart of the city, you always bought him the ink when you noticed he was running low before he did.

You bought him new leather journals when you saw one that he might've liked in a windowsil and bought him ones engraved as a gift on his birthday or during the holidays.

And, in turn, Kaz did the same. He bought you books from the authors you loved whenever he'd heard that a new one was releasing, took your most beloved books to a book binder when the covers were wearing out and the spines needed re-gluing.

He asked how you liked the books you were reading when he noticed you were reading a different one, bought you the books that your eyes lingered on whenever you'd see something in a bookshop window.

"It's good," you said. "How're the heist plans coming?"

"Decently enough," he responded. "A hundred thousand kruge per person on a seven person crew, if you're in?"

You grinned as you closed your book, looking at the cover for a moment.

"How convenient it is that you ask me to join you on a heist when the book I'm reading involves one."

"Is that your way of saying yes?"

You shot him a look, and he nodded. "Yeah. It's your way of saying yes."

You watched him stand, heading for your office, a pen, and one of his journals.

"Love you!" You called after him. You heard Kaz's amused laughter in response and smiled to yourself.

He didn't need to say it back for you to know he loved you in turn. If anything, he'd likely be the one to turn down the lamps and blow out the low-burning candles when he was done planning the heist he'd asked you in on.

He'd be the one to find you with a book in your lap, having told yourself "just one more chapter" even as your eyes were drooping and sleep was on its way

[sagurus]

Sure! When you have time I would love it if you any interactions between Saguru and any of the Gosho girls. It doesn't have to be shipped or whatever, but it's just because I've read so many of his interactions with the Gosho boys and I feel like the girls are underrated in that sense. I love crack and I love Saguru and I adore your writing and edits :)

Hey anon from 2018, lmao. You're right, there really do need to be more interactions between Saguru and the girls. I have a WIP I started recently that I feel really shows Aoko's acuity. It's not crack, but instead a tense interaction between two friends.

Eventually this'll make its way to AO3, but for now, here it is:

--

“So, Saguru-kun…”

Saguru finds himself bracing. Aoko has seemed to be in a strange mood the entire evening. He’d almost wondered if she was irritated with him at first, or maybe just more disappointed about Kuroba’s last-minute cancellation than she wanted to let on. But their plans had gone as expected otherwise; they studied, watched a show Aoko had been excited to show him over some reheated leftovers, all without incident. Now they’d settled in the living room, occupying themselves with their own activities.

But now, as casual as she was trying to seem, Saguru detected an underlying tension.

“Yes, Aoko-san?” He kept his eyes on his book.

“Did you know that Aoko’s dad thought Kaito was KID once?”

Saguru’s entire train of thought stuttered to a halt. Every thought vanished — and then his mind raced with questions. For what reason was she bringing this up? What kind of reaction was she expecting?

Her gaze was drilling into him, he could tell. She hadn’t turned away from her video game, but she had to be concentrating on him in her periphery. The sensation of it raised the hair on the back of his neck..

He turned the page, but wasn’t reading anymore.

“Did he? I’ve never heard anything about that,” Saguru said mildly. His heart rate was elevated. He focused on breathing normally.

“Yeah!” Aoko said, and she said it with a giggle. A feint. “He told me that and I thought it was so strange. Sure, he’s obnoxious, but he’s not stupid Kaitou KID.”

It was best to leave space in the conversation. He didn’t say anything, waiting for Aoko to continue.

“Anyway, Dad got a look at him at one heist, and he was sure he looked like Kaito. So to prove him wrong, I asked Kaito on a date!”

“A date?”

“Yep! I mean, thinking back that was pretty silly, but it got him to come. But isn’t that so weird? That he’d even think for a second that Kaito was KID?”

She sounded so cheery. The version of herself she put on in class when she was getting along with everybody. Masking away her acute intelligence and calculations. He used to think she wore her feelings on her sleeve - and to an extent she did. But these days he knew that there was plenty she kept under wraps. She and Kuroba were truly quite the pair.

“It does seem like a strange conclusion for the inspector to come to.” He tried to keep his voice neutral as he could. “How did the date go?”

Aoko stuck her tongue out, and for the moment turned her eyes back toward the screen, organizing her character’s inventory. “Oh, you know. Bakaito. He was his normal annoying self, but he showed up on time. We met up at Tropical Land and had a lot of fun! We saw a 3D movie and everything.” She paused, then added, “Actually, I even handcuffed us together. Which was probably overkill, honestly.”

Great minds think alike.

“And the heist?” Saguru asked.

“Oh, the heist still happened. And Kaito was with me the whole time.”

“Well, I imagine that remedied the inspector’s suspicions?”

“Yeah. Dad never said anything about it again.”

The conversation lulled into silence, but the tension in the room was palpable.

“It’s just weird. That’s the only time Dad has ever had a suspect. Honestly, I don’t get why he’d even entertain the idea.”

Saguru hmmed, hoping it sounded like agreement.

“I mean, Kaito is way too young to be KID. Everyone knows Kaitou KID has to be in at least his forties.”

“That does seem to be the most prominent theory,” Saguru said neutrally. It wasn’t the most satisfactory response, he knew. But he could toe this line, if he focused on the commonly-held beliefs and not his own hypotheses and opinions.

“I wonder who Kaitou KID actually is. Whoever it is, I really can’t stand him. I’d like to give him a piece of my mind for all the trouble he’s causing everybody.”

“That’s fair of you.” Saguru wouldn’t condemn KID himself. But he’s already made clear to her that he doesn’t share the same hostility. “What with KID’s talent, I wouldn’t be surprised if the public never comes to know his identity.” After a moment, he amended, “Not to imply the task force is lacking in talent or capability. Your father has prevented many thefts from coming to fruition.” Never mind the fact KID so far still hadn’t truly stolen anything regardless. “But no matter how successful plans are on this side, KID has still proven successful as an escape artist, if nothing else. We’ll just have to see if ever he’s caught, or we get a hint.”

“It would be nice, though,” Aoko said, and Saguru had a hard time reading her tone. “To know who it is.”

What was she trying to accomplish here? It felt like she was fishing. Like she wanted a specific response from him. She might want him to agree that it was a ridiculous idea, confirm that the suspicions were completely unfounded. But he couldn’t imagine lying to her outright. But on the other hand…

“Have you ever suspected anyone of being KID, Saguru-kun?”

Ah.

“Well,” he said.

He couldn’t bring himself to lie to her, but he certainly couldn’t tell the truth. Saguru wouldn’t betray Kuroba like that; Kuroba may not trust him, but Saguru wasn’t going to confirm Kuroba’s own impressions.

And it wouldn’t just be betraying Kuroba. It would be a betrayal of one of Aoko’s closest friends.

No winning. Catch-22.

He forced himself to turn the question over in his mind, as slowly as he could allow without seeming as if he took too long. It wasn’t like he’d obtained any real proof. Other than observable evidence that Kaito wasn’t KID. And the DNA proof he’d destroyed. Of course, Saguru knew, but technically he’d proved the opposite.

“You’ll laugh, but I actually suspected Kuroba once myself.”

Aoko paused her game. “You did?”

And now the tension amplified exponentially. Did she know? He’d suspected before that she might. With how perceptive she was, how could she not have at least considered it?

Even then, that didn’t mean he could confirm it. Kuroba was the only person who could do that.

Steady. “Yes, well. I did test the theory, and my suspicions were proven false.” Based on the happenings, anyway.

“How did you test it?”

Saguru crooked a slight smile now. Casual. Easy. Amused. “Much like you, I handcuffed myself to him just before the heist began.”

She still didn’t say anything.

“So, in both of our cases, the heist still went on. So that would appear to clear Kuroba’s name on two different accounts,” he said lightly.

“Yeah, I guess it does.”

She’d slipped a little, seemed more pensive than casually amused. She recovered quickly. “It’s so funny that both of you thought it was Kaito.”

The way she continued circling, the way she persisted… on some level, she must know.

Aoko asked, “What made you think it was him, anyway?”

At least the capacity of the labs was something he wasn’t at liberty to discuss. “Probably proximity bias,” Saguru said. It wasn’t entirely untrue. “KID has a tendency for elaborate magic tricks, and Kuroba is certainly the most talented magician I’d ever met.” And then, after a beat: “But there’s plenty of talented magicians out there.”

Aoko hmmed, and fell silent again. Saguru imagined her putting him under a microscope, considering everything he said. Everything he didn’t say.

She unpaused her game and resumed playing. “Yeah, Bakaito could never be KID,” she said.

But all Saguru could think was that there was no way she didn’t know how false that was.

[a-ginger-from]

Tagged by @steeple-sinderby-belles thank for tagging me!! Super excited to do this

Last song i listened to: I'm still your boy by Luke Hemmings

I feel like my music taste is so basic lol and I find that I just listen to the same artists over and over again rather than branching out. I also feel like I listen to more podcasts than music these days.

Favorite color: dark green!!

Currently watching: not really anything, I'm not a huge tv person, again I just like to rewatch my favorites over and over again lmao but the last tv series I watched was the artful dodger which I absolutely loved and highly recommend it's 1850s doctors and heists and a really cute love story and it's getting a season 2!!

Last movie I watched: captain America the first avenger

I was huge into marvel in the 2010s when it was at its peak and lately I've found myself getting back into it. I know it's military propaganda but dammit I love Steve rodgers

Currently reading: I'm about to start A Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes!

I didn't want to read it when it came out because I have a thing with authors writing prequels when the original work didn't call for it but I should have trusted Suzanne Collins more. I'm excited to get into it!

Sweet/ savory/ spicy: SAVORY!!

Give me all the salt lmao which is funny because I love baking but oh well

Last thing I googled: weather in Glasgow lol

Spurs were posting that it was cold and I was curious to see how cold. It's twenty degrees colder where I'm at so I would love to be there at the moment

Currently obsessed with: making soups probably!

I love making soups and I've been trying to make a bunch this winter. I make my own veggie stock then make soups with that. I think the last one I made was a creamy sausage one but now I have too much soup taking up space in my freezer lol

Currently working on: nothing really??

Just wrapping my Christmas presents and finishing up shopping I guess. Maybe planning what cookies to make this year for Christmas.

This was super fun! Tagging @tenthdocter @todareistodo and @audereestfuckery don't know if you've been tagged already but want to see what you say!!

[sarah-sandwich]

Rules: Answer and tag 9 people you want to get to know better and/or catch up with.

Thanks for tagging me @monaisme!

Favorite color: green 🍏🌿🌵

Last song listened to: Our Love from Arcane and now Take a Chance on Me by ABBA is playing 🌈

Currently reading: oh boy. I've been hopping between books again. I'm about halfway through Lords and Ladies by Terry Pratchett and am a few chapters into Clytemnestra by Costanza Casati, but I've been craving (spoiler alert!) a really good romance so I think I put both aside for a bit and see about getting into the bridgerton books

Currently watching: I'm like 4 episodes into dungeon meshi 👍 I am slow and inconsistent at TV shows though. Also about halfway through a movie I'm watching with my husband. I think it's called Army of Thieves? It's about a German safe cracker hobbyist that gets brought into a heist and everything in Europe is like normal modern Europe but in America there is a zombie?? apocalypse?? just happening????? as a background plot???????? I'm incredibly charmed.

Currently craving: a good!!! fucking!!!!!! romance!!!!!!! I'm so tired of attraction at first sight that never goes any deeper than wanting to bone but being anxious and awkward about it 😮‍💨 I need to FEEL it! Why this one?? SHOW ME!! He was a boy she was a girl just isn't enough for me Avril!!! Am accepting recs. Save me tumblrinas. Please.

Coffee or tea: A cup of coffee at the start of every day makes Sarah a happy girl. But it has to be my shitty store brand hazelnut stuff with an entire tablespoon of sugar and a splash of hazelnut creamer or it's just no good.

No pressure tagging: @myarmsaretoolong @fieldsofview @incognetomisquito

Side note my cat was attacking me while I tried to finish this. Photographic evidence:

[greenerteacups]

GT!

What’s on your letterboxd four favourite films?

Don't use letterboxd, but my fave four would be, in no particular order (bear in mind that I have Not Seen that many movies, and when I do watch movies, I usually go for action/adventure blockbusters that make dramatic use of the widescreen format):

Mad Max: Fury Road (the only film I love this much that I've never considered writing fanfic for, because it's so astonishingly Good I don't even want to touch it)

Inception (king among heist movies, a gorgeous high-voltane mindfuck starring all of the prettiest men alive, including a pre-transition Elliot Page — lives rent-free in my brain as a fusion of two of my favorite genres, low fantasy and heist films, hence the 80k Six of Crows AU. Considered giving this slot to Skyfall, which scratches the same itch in my brain, but I rewatch this a lot more than Skyfall and if I'm honest the writing is a smidgen tighter. For years I have been trying to psychically assail Christopher Nolan with my treatment for a sequel about Arthur and Eames working for the British secret service while Cobb goes playfully and ominously un-mentioned)

Challengers (insanely good writing / cinematography / direction / acting / editing / costuming. everything. jesus god. everyone working on this project Gets what it's about on such a high level the coordination is exceptional. the cinematography is extra to the point of being goofy sometimes but I've always fucked with a little melodrama when the situation calls for it)

The Sound of Music (one of the first movies I ever watched, my favorite musical of all time, includes some of my favorite songs of all time, and one of my favorite love stories of all time. maria's struggle between her love of the family/the Captain and her duty to god is [chefs kiss]. the dance scene where he's wearing the white gloves remains unmatched in terms of conveying sexual tension through dance. the COSTUMES!! insane. insanely good. actually I'm going to go watch it again right now

[gxbbyhoneybadger]

Richer than Gold

Pairing: !HH!Arthur Morgan x !F!Reader

Summary: Dutch has done it again, finding the jackpot for more money. He tells his gang about a rich man who spoils and loves his only child, hatching the perfect plan to kidnap the child for ransom. He sent his best men out to catch the victim, but what they got in return was something Arthur did not expect to meet, or better yet, fall for. But no one knew yet, just how dark the truth was behind the perfect dollhouse.

Warnings: adult language, guns, angst, tension, over-controlling parents, deception, abuse if you squint, forced arranged marriage, mutual pining, flirting.

This was just a drabble I thought of after I watched one of my favorite Pixar movies (Brave), I also added a twist to it, this was a winner at the polls!

The picture was edited by me.

Part 2, Part 3

Minors DNI 🔞 18 below the cut

--

Dutch had called everyone over, Tilly, Susan, Bill, Sean, Micah, Javier, Charles, John, Sadie, Mary-Beth, Molly, Lenny, Karen, Abigail, and the rest. Arthur approached after getting off his horse and listened to what Dutch was saying. "I've got a plan, this'll be our biggest and greatest heist there'll ever be!" Dutch said with a sly grin, "Just over in Saint Denis, a man named Richardson Jones, has just paid a visit to one of his many homes. And what's better than that! He has decided to bring along his greatest possession."

"Money?" Karen suggested. "Nope, his own youth." Dutch said. "A kid?" Bill chuckled. "Now, I know it sounds rather odd, but trust me when I tell you this. His child is his only weak spot, he'd do anything for his young'un to be happy! Spoiled to no end! We get our hands on his child and take it, he'll give us whatever we want! And trust me, Richardson is Richer than Gold itself." Dutch said.

"You want us to kidnap a child for ransom?" John questioned. "You won't even have to force the kid to follow, just use some damn candy." Micah snickered. John rolled his eyes as Jack wandered up to his mom's legs. "Arthur, John, Bill, Javier, Charles, Hosea, and I will leave to find Richardson's heir and bring it here for a day or two, afterwards, we get the money and book it to Tahiti!" Dutch said.

"But a child, Dutch?" Arthur finally said. "Yes, Arthur, a kid. It ain't going to be so terrible, we're not gonna hurt 'em." Hosea rubbed the back of his head as he listened, "It'll be a quick babysitting gig before we return the child, right, Dutch?" Charles questioned. "Yes, my boy." Dutch confirmed.

"He should be arriving pretty soon, we needa go and find out what our target'll look like. C'mon!" Micah yelled as he ran to his horse.

~~~

John, Arthur, Charles, and Javier, were set on catching the child as Dutch, Hosea, and Bill were gonna distract Richardson and his friends. "So he's the one richer than gold?" Javier asked as he looked through the binoculars at a handsome wealthy dressed man with a trimmed beard and silver eyes. The four men were hiding near the building which was close to the docks where the ship had been stationary for a while.

"Guess so." Charles said before looking himself. "You got candy, right?" John whispered to Arthur. "I got the damn candy, now I owe Jack." Arthur muttered. "Look! Look! Someone's coming out!" Javier warned the men. Richardson was speaking to a well dressed Dutch and Hosea.

"Gentleman, please meet my beautiful daughter, Y/n Jones L/n, she has her mother's last name." Richardson introduced as he raised his arm to point to a beautiful lady walking down the plank set on the dock. She had to be in her youthful years, beautiful jewelry, gorgeous dress, her hair done up in a stunning braid.

"Oh shit." Bill muttered, "I don't think he has a child, that has to be his wife."

"Hello, Gentlemen. It's an honor to meet my father's dearest companions." She smiled while bowing her head out of respect. Arthur held his face with on hand as he tried to contemplate a different way to get the girl. "Dammit, what are we gonna do now?" Javier asked. "Y'all keep an eye on her, I'll run to Dutch and Hosea, see what they think and I'll come back to you. Follow her." Bill said before running off.

John and Javier made their way towards an alley in the town while Arthur made his way closer to the docks to listen in on any conversation. "Oh. . . My." Hosea muttered when he and Dutch saw the young girl. "Mr. Matthews." Y/n smiled as she shook his hand, "Pleasure to meet you."

Arthur shook his head as he started to watch the girl, making sure she didn't take off. "Y/N!" A woman screamed as she ran towards her with excitement, holding her dress so she didn't fall and into Y/n's open embrace. "It's been so long!" The woman with red hair said.

"It has indeed, Kimberly! My goodness, look at you!" Y/n gasped as Kimberly spun around to show off her new purple dress. "It's beautiful, ain't it? Just got it yesterday from my daddy!", "Kimberly, my girl, you've grown up!" Richardson greeted as he hugged her. "I have, indeed, Mr!"

The two girls walked towards a small shop and sat down by a table, Arthur had quietly and discreetly made his way towards the corner and hid behind it to listen to the girls. "So! How old are ya, now?" Kimberly asked Y/n. "Can't you guess?", "Twenty-one!", "Nuh uh!", "Twenty-two?", "No.", "I don't know!"

Y/n let out a sigh and shook her head, "I'm twenty-four, Kim. It's only been five years since we last saw each other!" Y/n giggled, "It's strange to be here again, I forgot if it was nice here in Saint Denis?"

"Oh, absolutely! Except for the random robberies and such." Kimberly sighed. ". . . Robberies?" Y/n muttered with am inquisitive tone. Arthur rolled his eyes, already knowing what was going to come. The spoiled daddy's girl was about to complain and whine about the dirty old outlaws who take what they want.

"Where they really outlaws?!" Y/n gasped. Kimberly scoffed and crossed her arms, "I forgot you're a total freak when outlaws come up in a conversation. You don't even act like a lady!" Y/n laughed and pulled off her white gloves, "You know I hate wearing these dumb dresses, wearing this annoyin' heels, having my hair done in this tight and uncomfortable way! I despise it, Kimberly!" She whined.

That's a new one. Thought Arthur as he listened, Kimberly giggled and held Y/n's hands. "Thinking about sneakin' out tonight with me?" Kimberly asked. Y/n gasped and shook her head, "My daddy'll kill me!" Kimberly snickered and slapped Y/n's hand. "Ow-!", "Like you cared if he did. All you gotta do is cry and say that it was a mistake, then he'll just let you go as always. C'mon, I know you wanna. Maybe finally you'll find a man."

Y/n groaned and stood, "C'mon, my daddy already told me where our manor is. Let's go and have some fun before I roll my eyes outta my own skull." Arthur watched where they went and followed along. Soon, he and the two other men found Y/n at the large manor. This time she was wearing an entirely different attire.

She wore jeans with a button up red shirt, a cowgirl hat with some boots and a belt, her hair was down and hung beautifully down her back, and she was riding a large Shire Horse. All black with white cuffs around it's hooves and shins, it's mane was a beautiful raven color that shined off the sun. Y/n looked so small compared to the beast she was on top of. "Oh my goodness! Y/n's he's a big monster!" Kimberly gasped, still wearing her blue dress.

"He ain't no monster. He's big but really he's a big soft boy, ain't you Buckley!" Y/n cooed as she brushed Buckley's mane, his tail swished as he huffed out a thank you. "He likes it when you compliment him! Ugh! I've been waiting to get somewhere big and open for him to run in!" Y/n laughed.

"That a horse or a giant?" Javier asked with wide eyes. "My momma got 'em for me when I was just nine years old! Big boy here was still just a colt!" Y/n smiled as she clicked her tongue, Buckley's ears twitched before he started to walk forward slowly, each step he took, Y/n slightly bounced. "He's beautiful, ain't he?" She asked her friend. "A-Absolutely!", "Mother knows best! I've always wanted a horse and she got me the biggest one, daddy always said I'd never be able to handle one, but look at me now. She'd be proud. . ." Her smile faded as she held onto Buckley's reins.

"What's wrong, Y/n?" Kimberly asked. Y/n covered her eyes with one hand as she started to tear up. "Y/n!", "No, no. . . It's just my mother. . . I miss her. . . Ever since my uncle and my mother's death, daddy has been so different. . . He seems more cold to me, not in front of guests like you of course, but. . . With me, it's like he doesn't care. He sends me to all these classes, fencing, Spanish, French, Dutch, Italian and more but. . . He's never there for me, y'know. He doesn't like it when I take Buckley out, or even wear clothes like this. . . My mother always supported me, and so did Daddy, until she. . ." Y/n let out a stuttering sigh as she relaxed.

"Buckley and my bow are the only things my mother left me before she was taken away. . ." She whispered.

". . . Wait here." Kimberly said before running into the manor and coming out ten minutes later, dressed in a skirt and a shirt before jumping onto her own horse, a brown Thoroughbred with a black mane. "Kimberly!" Y/n said with a small smile. "I wanna see those talents put to work, here!" She said before tossing Y/n her signature bow and a quiver of arrows. She attached the quiver to her saddle and held onto her bow, "You really wanna see?" Y/n giggled while cleaning her tears.

"Course I do, I may be a Lady. But I always wanna see a good time." Kimberly smiled.

The girls laughed before their horses took off running down the large land of grass and towards the trees. "Keep an eye on them both." Javier warned the two before sneaking off to spy on any incoming guests. Arthur and John both found their horses and began to trail after the girls.

That was when the men saw the hidden talent that Y/n was hiding. Buckley ran and jumped over a fallen tree—Y/n had her bowstring pulled back before she released an arrow straight into an apple hanging from a tree. Buckley landed and kept running as Y/n reloaded another shot, she whistled and a flock of birds flew from the trees before she shot two with one arrow.

Buckley was quicker than the men's horses as he continued to pick up his speed. Kimberly was smiling at Y/n's joy as she leapt through the air with Buckley. Her hair flowed as she rode on through the woods, "Throw something!" Y/n shouted to Kimberly. Kim grabbed her old hat and threw it in the air, no longer than two seconds had passed before it was nailed straight into a tree by a sudden arrow.

"You're amazing at this Y/n!" Kimberly laughed. "Thank my momma!" Y/n smiled.

The men remained hidden til the girls rode him. They stayed hiding when a carriage came, carrying Richardson, another man and a woman, Dutch, Hosea, and even Bill who looked more cleaned up. "Gentlemen, let me bring you into our lovely home for a drink!" Y/n and Kimberly saw their parents exit the carriages.

"Oh no." Kimberly muttered before looking at Y/n, "Your dad doesn't like you wearing those clothes, don't he?" Kimberly whispered. ". . . No, no, he doesn't." Y/n hopped off Buckley and tapped his rear, "Go to the barn, boy. Put this back where you found it please, Kim?", "Okay. . ." She whispered.

She approached her father and looked at the men who finally saw her without the beautiful jewelry or the dazzling feminity she once carried in the morning. When Richard laid his eyes on his daughter, he practically gasped. "What do you think you're wearing?" He questioned her. "Daddy, don't get mad. It's just clothing-", "Excuse us, gentlemen, Antonio, please escort these men to the manor. Apparently, I must have a talk with my daughter about mannerisms and proper attire for a young lady." Richardson held her back before leading her to the side of the manor.

Arthur watched and listened nearby as Richard sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "What did I say to you the moment we got on that ship?" Richardson asked her. "Daddy, I-", "Don't you "daddy" me, young lady! You are not to be wearing such demeaning outfits such as this! You look like a street rat or worse, one of them outlaws! I send you to the best of schools, just like you need, I get you your own personal trainer in fencing, a degree, money, everything a woman would want!" He said.

"B-But daddy, I don't want-", "Enough!"

"I am not going to kid around with this. Get those clothes off and put on a proper dress. You look ridiculous. I shouldn't have let you keep that damn horse, he's the reason why you're acting up like this." He snarled to her, she grew tears as she looked down at the ground in shame. Arthur felt sorry for the girl, her fists were clenched as she steadied her breathing.

"I ain't a little girl no more, daddy." She whispered. "What?" Richard scoffed. "You can't control me and tell me what I want or need anymore." Richardson laughed and brushed his hair back. "You ain't gonna leave any time soon. I'm selling Buckley-"

"Daddy!"

"I don't want that damn horse around anymore. Your witch of a mother bought that thing in spite of me." He growled. "Buckley didn't do nothing to deserve this! Mother got him for me as a gift-!" Arthur's eyes grew big when Richard slapped her. His hand slowly snaking down towards his holster as he glared at the rich man

"I am your damn father. If I say I'm going to sell a damn horse, I'm selling it. I'll buy you a pony instead, now, you are going to walk up those steps, change out of your clothes and into a proper outfit. Mr. Jameson is coming over later with his son, Damon, who'll be your fiancee."

Y/n looked straight at her father with wide eyes while she held the side of her face from the pain. "Daddy-", "He has asked for your hand in marriage, and I had agreed. It's about time I find you a husband, we'll receive more money and land afterwards. Don't worry, Damon will treat you well."

Y/n shook her head as she started to back away from her father. "Get up those steps, right now. I'm right behind you." He growled, ". . . You know what." He grabbed her arm and started to pull her into the manor, she didn't fight back but obeyed his directions.

He made her go up the steps and had the maids help her get dressed. She wore a dark teal cotton dress, with white tights then a tight corset underneath it, her hair was braided back into a French braid. She was then sent downstairs, and stood by her father who was laughing with Dutch and Hosea.

"Yes, yes, exactly!" Hosea chuckled, "Your daughter looks lovely, you must adore her." Richardson laughed and covered his mouth. "She's too much to handle, that's why I'm going to marry her off." Hosea was taken by surprise as he looked to Dutch who arched his brow. Y/n simply looked away before breaking out into a run, getting away from the room.

"Y/n!" Richardson shouted.

"Y/n?" Kimberly said when she ran past her. Y/n didn't stop when she ran through the door and towards the barn, unlocking the stall, quickly slipping on the reins, snatching her quiver and bow, before jumping onto Buckley's wide body. She kicked her feet and he took off running. Richardson made it outside only for Buckley to brush past him with such speed—the wind knocked him backwards onto his back. "Y/n!!" He shouted.

Y/n didn't listen, she kept running. Tears falling from her face as she started to cry, holding onto Buckley's mane as he charged forward. Unwilling to stop or rest, even being a horse, he understood her emotions better than any person could. He was indeed a special gift from her mother. He ran and continued to go wherever he intended to go, and he knew just the place.

But what they didn't know was that Arthur was chasing them close behind.

~~~

When Dutch and Hosea ran out after Richard, Y/n had blown by them. Arthur came running with John and Dutch spoke: "Don't worry, Mr. Jones, I'll send my best men to go and fetch your daughter. Callaghan, go and get his daughter! Right now!"

Arthur tipped his head and called his horse before jumping on and chasing after the girl. One hand, after to catch her, and on the other, to comfort the poor thing. He listened to the heavy running from Buckley, he saw her soon enough as the horse zoomed through the trees and branches. For a giant beast, he sure was agile.

~~~

Buckley whined when he approached stone pillars that were placed around in a large circle, grass was everywhere as the forest provided a large open space. Y/n opened her eyes and wiped her tears to see clearly. When she did, she saw the tall stones. "Buckley. . . You. . . You remember this place?" She muttered, slowly she got off her horse, sliding off her shoes and letting her feet touch the bare grass—entering the large circle. Looking at the stones.

She sniffled and stood in the grass, beside one of the pillars, a heavy puff of air was blown into her hair as Buckley slowly and gently knelt down on his knees before slumping against the pillar and lying down. Y/n knew that position he always made, she knelt and sat down. Leaning her back against his hefty shoulders before he rested his large head in her lap. Letting her brush his mane.

Her tears fell as she kissed his head, "He doesn't want me to have you. . ." She whispered with closed eyes, "I want to love him, Buckley, I really do. . . But he just makes things so much more difficult. . . First, he takes away my dreams to become an archer. Then my goal to become a seamstress, now the only two things my mother left me."

Buckley huffed and nudged his face closer into her chest, she hugged his neck and rested her head on his. Before hearing a crunch from afar, she stood and pulled out her bow. Aiming the arrow straight as Arthur who raised his hands.

"Hey now, easy there." He said while slowly walking towards her. Buckley stood and protectively walked up besides Y/n as he watched the strange man approaching. "I'm just here to bring you back home." He said. Y/n shook her head as she pulled the bowstring even tighter, "I'm not going back. . . Not without my horse." She muttered.

"I understand. What if we went somewhere, jus' for a day or two. You and me?" Arthur asked. "Why would I trust a stranger like yourself? You're just gonna be paid off by my father to drag me back!" She accused him, he kept his hands up and reached up for his hat before it was shot clean off his head and pinned into one of the stone pillars.

Arthur looked at her with shock as she instantly grabbed another arrow, "Don't move." She warned him. He simply nodded his head. "Want me to tell you somethin'?" He questioned, "I heard you chattin' with your friend, Kimberly her name? Said you was interested in outlaws robbin' Saint Denis. Lemme show you somethin'." Quicker than a blink of an eye, Arthur shot Y/n's quiver off her hip and placed his gun back in his holster.

She gasped and almost tripped as she jumped to the side. Still holding her bow as arrows spilled on the grass, she looked back at him and growled. "You owe me for that!" She hissed. "You come with me, and I'll pay you back. Buy a whole new case for yer." He offered.

"How do I know that you won't drag me back?" She questioned. "Lady, I'm not the type to force a woman to do what she doesn't want to do, but I am one to listen. And you can trust me when I tell you, I ain't takin' you back to your daddy." Arthur said.

Y/n was hesitant, but she glanced at Buckley who let out a soft huff from his large nostrils. She eased the tension on her bowstring and lowered her weapon, removing the arrow from the string as she let it drop onto the fallen pile of arrows. ". . . You swear?" She asked. "I swear, ma'am."

Y/n rolled her shoulder before strapping her bow into her chest then grabbing the quiver which now had a broken strap. ". . . Where to?" She muttered. "I know a place. Just, take your time getting on that horse." Arthur backed away and let her have alone time with Buckley.

Out of sight for a moment, he walked towards the tree and spotted Javier and John walking towards him. He stopped them before telling them his plan, saying to tell Dutch where he was going to be. "Yer goin' to Horseshoe Overlook?" John muttered. "Hosea said it was a good place to lie low, I'll be there with the girl. Holding her there for 'bout a day or two before I come back-", "About that, Arthur. . ." Javier cut in, "Dutch said we might need to keep her for a week instead."

"What?" Arthur mumbled. "Dutch said that he and Hosea could possibly raise the price to whoever finds her, from money to solid gold bars!" Javier whispered. "Where'd you go, Mr?" Y/n asked. John and Javier both ran off quickly as Arthur turned around, "Just about to grab my horse." He said. Y/n arched her brow and looked at his horse.

". . . She's beautiful." She muttered, Buckley following right behind her. "Thank you." Arthur said as he walked to his ride, he grabbed his hat first before setting it on his head. "Ma'am." He added before jumping into the saddle. Y/n climbed onto Buckley bareback and looked at Arthur. "I never got your name." She said.

"Arthur Callaghan." He replied, "Now, Y/n, follow me."

~~~

"Little brat just ups and decides to run off!" Richardson cursed, Dutch approached him and held his shoulder. "Callaghan is an amazing hunter, although he ain't exactly cheap for his type of service. He expects payment from me, which I can only get from someone else paying me." Dutch sighed.

Richardson groaned as he looked back at Hosea, "How much are you asking for?" Dutch just smirked.

~~~

Y/n rode close beside Arthur, he gave her a small cloak for her to wear and cover her head just in case it started to rain. "May I ask why you ran off so suddenly?" Arthur questioned. ". . . My father was plannin' on marrying me off to some random man I've never met. Selling my horse, and who knows what else." She said, "I wanted an out. . . So I left. I didn't expect this to happen."

Arthur shook his head and looked at Buckley, "What's his name?", "Buckley. . . Sometimes I call him Buck for short." Y/n answered. Buckley bowed his head and kept walking, "I taught him that trick." Y/n smirked.

Arthur chuckled at the small gesture. "C'mon, we needa speed up and get there before dark."

~Y/n pov~

The breeze was gentle, and the crickets chirping from the distance was calming to hear. I set Buckley by a tree and let him eat the grass, I looked over my shoulder and saw Arthur Callaghan fixing up a tent. I don't know where he got it from, but it's something. I've never slept in a tent before, or a cot.

I'm used to a large king sized bed, multiple blankets. Now it was just a small cot, a blanket, and probably campfire, one side of me was excited that I was camping, but another was terrified that I left my home with a stranger and I'm also staying with him. "So what's your plan?" I said. "What plan?" Arthur replied.

"When my father sends his men after me? He's going to send the entire town to find me.", "Trust me, ma'am, I don't plan on bein' caught." His southern drawl sounded rough but also sexy at the same time. I turned away from Buckley and slowly stepped closer as he tied something up, "You've done this before, I see?"

"Plenty of times, ma'am. Sometimes I travel with a group." He said. "Is it always this quiet?" I asked. "Rarely if I'm with a group." I sat on a log and sighed when my dress snagged on a twig, "Dammit." I scowled as I tugged it off. "You alright, there, Ma'am?"

"I'm okay, it's just, excuse my language but, it's my damn dress. It gets stuck on everything!" I sighed. I was looking at the sky when I heard Arthur approaching me, I turned my head and finally saw just how handsome he looked up close. "Do ya wanna buy somethin' else to wear?" He asked me. "I. . . Um, if you don't mind. I don't really care." I stuttered before looking away.

Were men's eyes always that blue? They look like pools of the ocean! "I can stop by a shop." He knelt down and started to stack a few sticks together for a fire later tonight, "I just needa know yer size and I'll be back, y'know, so people won't catch you sneakin' around." I just nodded my head while clenching my dress, I felt something tingling in my stomach but I didn't know what it was.

"Y-Yes, that'll be wonderful, Mr. Callaghan." I muttered, "I'd very much appreciate it." He set a small fire and wrote down my size for shirts and pants. "Thank you, really, Mr. Callaghan."

"No problem, ma'am. All you need to do is stay here. I'll be back." He said, he left soon after and I looked back at Buckley. "You like it here buddy?" I asked him. He flapped his ears and continued to graze the grass as he slowly found his way towards me.

The sun was close to setting, I could see the darkness coming as the crickets started to grow louder. It was beautiful outside, I stood and walked towards the cot and saw the lamps inside the tent. He has done this many times.

It was odd being outside after dark like this. I was used to a curfew; I reached up and undid my hair and let it down, undoing the braids completely as I sighed with relief. The tension was undone. I believe thirty minutes or so had passed before Arthur came back, I looked and saw that he carried a few boxes and set them on a table he left behind. "I don't have much of a fashion sense but. . ." I approached the boxes and lifted the tops off each one, seeing a different outfit in each of them.

Red flannel with jeans, another set with a blue shirt and a beautiful belt, another with a black shirt and two different hats, each one had a spare white shirt to wear underneath, different set of undergarments. "I didn't know which one you'd like, so I bought the best three they had-", "Thank you so much, Mr. Callaghan!" I smiled while hugging him. Never has a man or even a boy bought me clothing that I always wanted to wear and feel comfortable in. "You don't needa thank me, ma'am. Oh, and here. . . Thought you might needa few pairs." He grabbed one more box and placed it in my hands.

When I opened it, I felt my eyes shimmer with joy as I overlooked a beautiful pair of boots. ". . . Arthur. . ." I mumbled as I let my finger trace over the delicate pattern of golden roses that blended beautifully with the rich tan and black color. "I sorta measured your shoe size when I was fixin' the fire." My smile was bigger than ever before when I grabbed the clothing. "Thank you!" I said again before running into the tent with two boxes.

~3rd pov~

Arthur didn't know how to react when she hugged him, or even thanked him for simply buying a few outfits. Never had he had a woman almost tear up over some clothes, even though he had Sadie and Tilly help him with the clothing choices at the shop. He brushed his hair and slipped his hat back on, he kept thinking how he was going to keep a woman inside a camp for an entire week without scaring her off.

He tended to the fire and walked to his horse which carried two hares that he had hunted down on his way back. "You won't last long." He muttered. "Mr. Callaghan?" Y/n said. "Yes?", "Can you help me with something?"

Arthur approached the tent and stood by the flaps, "Anything, ma'am." He replied. Y/n exited the tent and was only wearing her corset with her undergarments covering her legs. "Do you mind undoing this corset for me? I can't reach it, those maids tied it up in a way I couldn't undo it without someone's help." She awkwardly said.

"Oh. . . Of course, here. Turn around." He said, when she did, he felt a small smile tug at the corner of his lips. Her bashful face and her sweet voice made him smile. He pulled the strings loose and undid the different knots and ties before it came undone. "There you go.", "Thank you." She said before entering the tent once more.

"Was your daddy always this. . . Demanding?" Arthur asked her. "Uhm, no actually. When I was nine he wasn't like this at all. He liked it when I wore jeans and boots, supported me about my talents with my bow, but. . . Then his twin brother, or my uncle, and my mother were killed. That's when he changed. Ever since, he's never wanted me to shoot another arrow, dress the same, or even ride Buckley anymore." Y/n answered.

"Wait, how do you know that he was demanding? I never told you all of that." Arthur chuckled and let his thumbs hook onto his belt, "I sorta overheard your conversation by the side of your mansion, I heard him hit you. I was tempted to shoot him right there and then." He confessed.

Y/n was silent, Arthur thought he made her uncomfortable but inside of the tent. She was grinning as she slid the belt into the loops of her jeans. "Well, I appreciate the thought, Mr. Callaghan. Your wife must be lucky to have found such a good man like yourself." She complimented him.

"Nah, I ain't married. I was, but it didn't work out." He said. "Oh, I'm sorry.", "It's alright."

Y/n slid on her boots and sighed when she stretched her arms, she opened the flaps of the tent and walked out. "What do you think?" She asked. Arthur could feel his heart leap out of his chest when he saw her dressed. The jeans brought out her hips, the shirt fitted around her waist and chest so well. The hat on her head and her boots tied it all together along with two regular braids hanging off both her shoulders as she leaned on her leg and crossed her arms.

"Beautiful. . ."

"What was that?" Y/n smiled as she looked at Arthur's dumbfounded expression. "I. . . You look good." He said. Bringing a brighter smile to her lips as she spun around in her new attire, "This feels amazing! It's all brand new! I love these boots, the hat, everything!" She said.

"What do you think we can do tomorrow?" She asked him while looking at the sky. "Whatever you wanna do." He answered. Y/n giggled and took in a deep breath, "I think I like it here." She sighed, "Let's go hunting tomorrow! We can find a deer—oh! Or a bear!"

"A bear?" Arthur said. "I've always wanted to hunt a bear. Especially Mor'du." She muttered. "Who the hell is Mor'du?" Arthur questioned. "You never heard the legend of Mor'du?"

Arthur shook his head and Y/n grinned, "I'll tell you if you take me hunting." She said. Arthur hung his head and sighed, "Sure, we can go hunting tomorrow." He replied

"Yes!" She smiled before hugging him again, "This is going to be the best few days of my life!"

_____________________________________

Part 2 coming soon!

[allthefoolishdreams]

hello!! sorry i know it's been ages since you reblogged that ask game, but 3, 4, 19 and 25 for spidey minlix please? <3

hii!! okay had to scroll back to find it but thanks for the asks <333

3. Did the idea change at all by the time the fic was complete?

obviously the fic is not yet complete but the general idea and overarching plot at its core is more or less the same. however once I actually started writing I decided to flesh it out more which of course changed some things, because there's definitely scenes that I did not originally plan out

4. If the fic required it, what did you research in order to write it?

i did look up different museums in nyc and what art/artifacts they have, but im pretty sure i have kept it somewhat vague within the story. also watched a show about art heists that happened to get ideas but i do rely on movie heist logic since it's a superhero fic anyways. another thing i've done research was spider-man lore to get inspiration on the plot and what the villains would be up to, and storylines that had spider-man and black cat team ups, again for some plot inspo (also to find quotes for the chapter titles)

19. While editing, did you kill any darlings? What were they?

honestly no, i did not actually kill any darlings i definitely reworked stuff but it lead to me writing scenes i liked a bit better, there are ideas that i have but since i havent written those in yet i dont think they count as being killed if i dont include them. (i do have the final scenes written so those darlings might die depending on how the rest of the middle goes)

25. Share your favorite line

oooh ngl i dont think i can choose a favorite line!!

fic writer asks!

[thenationaltreasuregazette]

Book of Secrets Fails as a Sequel on Every Conceivable Level, a Treatise:

Part 1/? : Introduction

Hello treasure hunters, nerds, and fellow weirdos still obsessed with a movie from 2004,

The time has come.

We will begin a long-awaited/threatened deep dive into Book of Secrets and why it just isn't as satisfying as the original.

I've been putting off starting this series in order to 1) spare us all and 2) to avoid this swallowing all other topics. I've decided to solve problem number 2 by having this be a separate series. You can recognize it by the extra blue banner up top, and it will be posted Thursdays (ish, maybe kinda. That's the goal.)

If ripping BoS to shreds doesn't sound like your idea of a good time, all of these posts will be tagged as #a treatise on book of secrets. I'm not here to yuck on anyone yums or sour your fandom experience. But I will be yucking on my own yuck for sport.

With that said,

The Thesis

Listen. Listen. I want to like National Treasure: Book of Secrets. My fan experience would be so much easier if I did. The trouble is, every time I see it I like it less.

On the surface it's a perfectly serviceable movie. It brings back all the main heroes from the original for more history, more heists, and another action-packed treasure hunt. Sounds great, right?

And it is! Kind of. It might not have quite the same earnestness or off-beat charm of its predecessor, but it's fun enough to watch.

Except.

⛏️

⛏️

⛏️

I just can't turn my brain off enough with this movie any more. The same interest that makes every watch of National Treasure fresh and engaging makes BoS seem worse and more frustrating.

And I will now subject you all to it!

My premise is this: Book of Secrets is a middling movie—fine, adequate, I-had-a-decent-time-at-the-theater-and-never-thought -about-it-again, alright—but it fails to be a satisfying sequel to National Treasure on just about every conceivable level.

We'll begin with what I see as the most egregious problem: the characters. Specifically, let's begin with the funky little guy driving everything:

Next time, Ben's character arc →

[theseventhoffrostfall]

i saw the conan movie for the first time last night. It might be one of my new favorite examples of a B movie that had no right to put in as much work as it did. Definitely strays from the original stories and I'd almost prefer if Arnold had even fewer lines than he did. But the cinematography has the scope of a 70mm old epic, the set design and worldbuilding in a weird migration era world was a breath of fresh air from generic high fantasy, and I have been listening to the soundtrack since.

then I saw conan the destroyer and comparatively it sucked but honestly as a pulp b movie, it was exactly what it needed to be albeit a bit too pg13 and light.

have you seen any of the conan movies? i love how the stories range from pulp heists, to orientalist "evil chinese warlord" to stuff that almost feels like the non-viking bro viking myths like Frost Giant's Daughter, doomed romances like Queen of the Black Coast, to outright Westerns. I want Netflix to die 1000 deaths before they get their hands on it, but a good 40-60 minute serial adaptation of the best 5-10 of his stories like what the BBC does with detective series might turn out good in theory because again modern tv is hell.

I've only seen the first two, because I think a negative number of people ever bothered watching the Jason Mamoa one, but yeah the first one especially had some real passion and attention to detail behind it. As that famous thread pointed out, there's an entire complete character arc hidden in like five shots featuring a character with no lines.

The anthology of short films is definitely the way to go for Conan, yeah. They're episodic and often self-contained and wouldn't work trying to fit the "8-32-hour continuous story" format that every show follows now.

The main fear I'd have for that is that, like we've discussed before, sword and sorcery is a genre that absolutely needs to take itself seriously. The instant it slips into some self-aware, wink-and-nod meta-joke even for a second, the whole thing collapses like a house of cards. It's no longer the Age of Whedon and high-budget genre films can survive outside of an all-irony atmosphere again, but I still have little faith in most creators to have that kind of trust in audience buy-in, especially if they were riding off of the campy elements of the adaptations like the Frazetta-inspired outfits and Conan having a thick accent

[myloveforhergoeson]

20

20: she's got a boyfriend now by boys like girls

(send me a number 1-100!!!)

augh... tasw namesake song. at first it started as a jealous james song in my mind when dak and roxy were together, but now it think it fits mag and brand new day pretty well...

this follows the scene in chapter 31 after mag invites roxy to the bnd album release party

-

Slipping back into apartment 5-A, Mag pocketed his keys as he strode into the near empty living room.

The beige walls and suspiciously stained shag carpet were already such an eyesore, and he and Dani had been in LA for months at this point, but neither of them could bring themselves to use their precious free time to decorate. Their manager was working them hard, day in and day out, leaving making the space their own pretty low on the priority list.

For now, the two, old lawn chairs in the middle of the room did, while their small portable TV was sat atop of one of the moving boxes on the longest wall they had. Dani was sitting there, not moving at all at the sound of Mag's arrival, watching an old heist movie Mag thought was vaguely familiar.

It took Dani a second, they were always so invested in the plot of these stories despite watching them over and over, but eventually, when there was a pause in the dialogue, they asked, "How'd it go?"

From their tone, Mag knew they were only being polite when they asked. Inviting Roxy to their album release party had been his idea; Dani didn't seem interested if she came in the slightest. Which the singer felt pretty strange, considering how close the three of them used to be.

"She's got a boyfriend now." Joining Dani on the free lawn chair, Mag practically fell into the uncomfortable seat. "Isn't that weird?"

The chattering on the TV continued in the background.

"That's not what I meant." His friend replied, eyes still glued to the screen. Nonchalant as ever. "Is she coming or not?"

A heavy feeling set in Mag's chest, one he couldn't explain, and while it was annoying, the boy did his best to ignore it. "Only if her boyfriend can come... Like they're connected at the hip or something"

The singer fiddled with one of the zippers on his battle jacket, waiting for a reply that never came. Chest still constricting, he sighed once more.

"It's sad what this town's doing to her." Mag blurted out, unprompted. His palms were slick with sweat, sticking to the plastic armrests. A slight metallic taste from his lip ring settled on his tongue. "Letting her put her feelings over a good networking opportunity..."

Now, Dani finally looked Mag's way, giving him a quick once-over with furrowed brows before turning back to the movie. "If you want her there that bad, invite him."

"He'd stick out like a sore thumb."

"So don't invite him."

"But Roxy needs to see what she's missing out on!" Mag was still fighting back, voice slightly raising. "Leaving us behind only to run off to Hollywood with some stupid boyband? What a sellout..."

"So invite him!" Dani was beginning to push back as well, turning up the volume on the TV with the remote in their hand. "I literally couldn't care less about this... jealousy thing you've got going on."

"I am not jealous." He bit, realizing that only made him sound more jealous. "Just doesn't seem like her is all. Writing for a pop band, dating some airhead prep, playing by someone else's rules... It's like she's a whole different person."

"Are you still the same person you were a year ago?" Dani asked and Mag was quick to nod his head.

"Aside from a fat record contract and a couple new tattoos? I'm the same guy I've always been."

Huffing again, now signaling the conversation was over, Mag stood up and stocked off to his room.

If that's the case, he asked himself as he slammed the door and flopped down on the edge of the bed, reaching for his baby blue electric guitar, why did seeing her make me feel so different?