#i've been saying i'll read anna karenina for like a year but this year i genuinely will read it. i promise

[river-gale]

tagged by @archmotif to share some of the books i want to read in 2025!!

tagging @bluejay-07, @so-much-purple, @evenaturtleduck, @aki-chan2014, and @carovert!! no pressure, of course!!

[athenasdaydreams]

pairing: jess mariano x fem!reader

summary: jess does not want to, and would never dance. except this one time

chapter warnings: none to my knowledge!!

A/N: Guess what dumbass pressed ctrl z and deleted all her work so she had to type it out again. OKAY IT'S BEEN A WHOLE YEAR SINCE I POSTED OR SOMETHING BUT I GOT TIRED OF STUDYING AND DECIDED TO FINISH THIS UP TO TIE UP SOME LOOSE ENDS

You had your legs on a table of Luke's diner, and you could not fathom how anyone could ever be more bored than this. You had to sit through Liz Danes' bachelorette party. You could imagine anything that would have been better than this. Being out with Rory and Paris, talking to Lorelai, or even letting Michel show you pictures of his chow chows. Letting out a sigh, you went back to reading Anna Karenina while the middle-aged women were talking about women not being monogamous creatures. "Is this how turkey legs are supposed to look?" Luke asked with a pained expression on his face. Carrie, one of the louder ones, said something about him taking his pants off so they could see for themselves. As much as you hated it, their conversations were kind of interesting. "Get your legs off my table I've got customers eating on 'em," Luke scolded as he looked at the turkey leg in his hand, as if he hoped that it would tell him whether it was cooked or not. You put your legs down and continued reading.

"I need to get some batteries, I'll be back," Jess said as he walked down the stairs. He noticed you were at the diner and stopped in his tracks. "Didn't know that you liked spending your afternoons with middle aged women." That comment made Carrie and the other women gasp. "The old ladies I wanted to knit with were busy, so I had to find company."

"Good book though," He said while you hummed in response. "Jess, Jess! Come over here and meet my oldest friends!" Liz said as she beckoned him over. Jess looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there. "Girls, this is Jess," Liz said proudly. A chorus of 'hellos' sounded. "Hello, handsome," Carrie said as she winked. You had to stifle a laugh for the sake of Jess. "He's going to walk me down the aisle! Is that cool or what?" Liz said to her group.

"It's no big deal," Jess said, trying to draw away attention from him. You found this funny. "It's a very big deal," you said with a dramatic look on your face. Jess gave an unimpressed look. At that time, a deliveryman walked through the door.

"Can I help you?" Luke asked with the confusion written across his face. "Got a package here." "From who? I'm not expecting anything?"

"It's a very important package," the deliveryman said with a serious look on his face. Luke stepped closer. "But there's no address on it?"

Jess smirked as he looked over to you. "I was going to go to the bookstore after getting batteries. Care to join?" he said, extending his hand to you. Looking for any way to escape this situation, you obliged. "Bye Luke, see you later."

"Have fun," Jess said with a laugh as you left the diner and heard a muffled "Have fun with what?!" as music started blaring from the inside.

-

"I was already having a bad day and then some guy had to spill his coffee all over my new blouse and my copy of crime and punishment," you lamented to Jess while you walked towards the bookstore which you frequented. "I didn't have enough money to get myself a new copy and a new blouse, so I decided to get the blouse because of my internship." Jess smiled at that. You were hardworking and diligent, while he was... less of that. You just got the coveted internship at one of the most competitive law firms in Connecticut, and you needed to make a good impression; a shiny copy of crime and punishment accompanied by a coffee stained lavender blouse wouldn't exactly do that.

The jingle of the door chime woke you from your thoughts about your precious copy of crime and punishment. Jess bent his head and didn't say anything to Kirk, the acting cashier, while you smiled and greeted him. You knew he wasn't one for politeness, so you tried to compensate.

"There's something I think you'll like." Jess meandered towards a shelf hidden at the back. You cluelessly trailed, wondering what book it could be. Knowing Jess, it could be a 2000 page book about a whale or a 20 page romance novel; the man read anything and everything with words on it. When he pulled a book off a shelf, your jaw dropped.

The blood-red lettering reading "crime and punishment" contrasted starkly to the obsidian binding that you ran your fingertips across.

"wow, this must cost a fortune, maybe i'll get it once my paycheck can get me more than one cup of instant ramen."

"let's go, i need to see what the guy at the diner did to luke,"

-

"does this dress look like too much?" you ask while twirling around in front of Lorelai. "no, this one is perfect. It makes you look like you'd be sitting in a tower waiting for your prince to save you from a dragon." You looked at her while she lounged on the couch in the house you had graciously invited yourself into. Well, she wasn't wrong. The dress was a light blue, silky fabric billowing around your ankles. The sleeves added to the whimsicalness of the dress. "only if the prince was Jesse Bradford,"

"you know what would make Prince Bradford fall in love with you even more? this flower crown," Lorelai said as she got up and pulled out a pretty-looking headband from a shelf. She put it on you and turned you towards a mirror.

"rory never let me dress her up like a princess; i should adopt you."

-

"hear ye, hear ye! announcing the arrival of her Royal Highness, the Princess, finally gracing us with her presence!"

"shut up, i was five minutes late; being a princess is hard work, you should know," you joked to Jess. You two met up near the gazebo, his reasoning being that he needed to make fun of you all dressed up as long as he could before he had to walk his mom down the aisle. "do you want to go get a seat? you're gonna be here for a long time. or maybe not, i've only been to three of my mom's weddings. "aren't you gonna sit down too?" you asked. "my mom wants me there to give her "emotional support" whatever that means," he joked as he led you to a seat next to lorelai and luke. Carrie from the diner yesterday was talking to them. lorelai looked concerned and luke just looked uncomfortable.

"hey, is everything alright?"

"no, there's gonna be a delay since liz ripped her dress and it's gonna take some time to fix it," carrie explained. "she told me to spread the message,"

"well, spread it car." luke got a suggestive look from carrie. "the message, the message." When carrie walked away, luke looked like he hadn't gotten oxygen in a good five minutes. "that woman makes me uncomfortable."

"poor liz, does she know how to fix something like that?" you asked jess and luke. "she was never one for household skills-" "i used to stitch up her renaissance fair costumes. trust me, she can't" jess interrupted luke. "i'll go see if she needs some help. where did you say she was?"

"she's at miss patty's,

-

You could hear Liz's laments from outside miss patty's. "my dress is ruined! how am i going to get married in a torn dress?" you pushed open the doors to Miss Patty's and gave Liz a concerned look. "I heard you needed some help? can i do anything for you Liz?" you asked, moving over to take a look at her dress. "I'm such a klutz, i tripped standing up and now its torn," she held up the side of her dress where there was an obvious tear. You grimaced and picked up the Doose's brand sewing kit from the table next to her, attempting to fix her dress.

"There you go! as good as new," you finished up the last stitch on her dress. "Oh, you're such a darling," Liz fixed up her hair. "you'd make a great daughter in law to a lucky lady someday. Could you tell jess to get ready for my grand entrance?"

The implied message didn't go past you. With cheeks redder than what your dollar store blush could get you, you thanked her and went down to the gazebo.

-

The ceremony passed by quickly, with you and Jess trying to think of sad and miserable things to make you stop laughing at the proceedings. "Oh man, i swear to you my wedding's gonna be better than whatever that was," you said, wiping the tears of laughter from your eyes as everyone went to the buffet line to get some food. "We'll see that," jess said as he inspected a turkey leg before putting it on his plate. You gave him an offended look. "Do you not think my wedding would be so much better than this 1500s medieval thing going on out here? I'd totally pick out a better theme," you said as you piled some mysterious looking food onto your plate. "I highly doubt that, and I hope you know that what you're putting on your plate is minced liver."

Your hand froze right right before you almost dumped another spoonful food onto your plate. You promptly pushed off the whole serving of minced liver back into the serving bowl. "That was so uncouth of you, private school girl. Did they not teach you manners at your finishing school?" You elbowed jess in the side as you chose a much more appetising looking burger prepared specially, from luke's. "one, i'm in college now; two let's sit down. I don't think they taught you table manners either city boy,"

-

After finishing up your dinner, you two decided to walk around to socialise. If socialise meant to make fun of every person in renaissance attire.

"the guy in the pantaloons probably thinks energy drinks count as water," jess pressed his lips to your ear, narrowly missing your cheek because of how much you were laughing. Everyone must have thought you two were drunk or high, from how hard you two were laughing. That was when you heard medieval sounding music playing where everyone had gathered.

"jess. you have to dance to this. i physically need to see it," you clung onto his arm, bringing him to the area near the gazebo, where Liz and TJ were dancing. They were doing some complicated looking dance straight out of the middle ages. "no way am i doing that. i'd rather slam my tongue in a car door." "please...?" "no." "...pretty please?" "fine, but you're coming out there with me." and before you could say no, he'd already dragged you to the dancefloor.

you'd be lying if you said you didn't have fun embarrassing yourselves. you'd only been dragged out of the dancefloor because TJ wanted to seranade Liz with a special dance just for her, and boy, were you glad you didn't have to see that.

-

Jess was walking you over to the gilmore house, where you'd been crashing with lorelai since your exams had been over. You, being a rich international student who's parents knew Richard and Emily Gilmore, had been asked to stay with them when you went to Chilton, and to Yale subsequently. Of course you could always tell them that your exams hadn't ended yet, and you were still staying at Yale, but where's the fun in that? You, lorelai, and rory, were planning on having a weekend of binging old movies and junking on the most unhealthy food you could find, so being a few days early wasn't a problem.

"after this is back to new york?" you asked him while approaching the door of lorelai's house. "maybe not, this time. might stay here for a bit; it's not that bad," he responded, leaning on the door. "any plans for summer?" you looked up at him. "you know, i've always wanted a summer romance. you know the type you read in the books, the notebook and stuff like that," you played with the straps of your purse. "maybe that'll be one of my plans," he said as he grabbed your waist and held you right up to him. "want it to be longer than just summer though." he pressed his lips to yours as he ran his fingers through your hair. you took a second to react, but you were kissing him back too. when you pulled apart for air, breathing heavy, you smiled.

"can't wait"

wc: 2.1k

[elizabeth-karenina]

They Got Me Yet Again

I got tagged by long-time mutual, @midnightinjapan! Thank you so much, my dear.

This one's gonna be a doozy, so strap yourselves in! *cracks knuckles*

1. why did you choose your url?

My first name is Elizabeth, and I was reading the novel Anna Karenina when I first started this tumblr.

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.week.

LMAO, MY GUYS! I honestly don't know how other people keep up sideblogs. Having to manage one is already enough! I've never really felt the need to have another one.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

....I'm like, 98% certain that I first came here in May 2013. So, I wasn't here at the very beginning where all the True Madness of Tumblr was taking place, but I came in near the tail-end of it all, LOL.

4. do you have a queue tag?

I don't queue at all! Again, I've never felt the need to do so. I'mma show up when I show up; I'm gonna reblog whenever I want and whatever makes me happy; and then I'mma leave, LOL.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

I was talked into it by my core group of friends who I've been close with since high school and college. And the irony of it all? I'm the one who still uses Tumblr regularly! The rest of them either deleted their Tumblrs or just simply abandoned them and have left them alone for years, LOL.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

It's a painting by the Russian artist Vasily Surikov called The Siberian Woman. I love his style of painting, and I've always been surprised how me and the woman in the painting look alike! Another one that I use frequently is Portrait of a Lady by Franz Xaver Winterhalter, for the same reason--she looks quite a bit like me!

I've tried having other icons on and off, but I always come back to the Siberian woman and Portrait of a Lady. What can I say? They fit me.

7. why did you choose your header?

It's an image I nicked from Twitter. It must've been from a historical textiles or blue motifs post that someone made, and I immediately was drawn to it. Blue is my favorite color, especially darker blues. The gold flowers made it even prettier, so I've kept it.

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

I honestly have no idea! I don't often make my own posts, as it were. Any commentary I make is usually within the confines of my tags (which is also very frequent and often!), which are many! I've got a lot of things to say, and I'm gonna say 'em somwhere, LOL!

9. how many mutuals do you have?

I truly do not know, if you can believe it. Probably around 20; I don't make it a point to make so-called "famous" blogs follow me, but if we've talked more than 4 or 5 times, I'll probably follow you back.

Many of my mutuals are ladies I've known for years, so that probably is a factor as well.

10. how many followers do you have?

Eight hundred seventy-something people? But are they all active Tumblrs? Or are a good portion of them bots, LOL? Sometimes I'm able to catch them and block them, but other times I miss them.

11. how many people do you follow?

146 people.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

I'm sure I have in the past, especially in my early days.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

Quite a bit, LOL, especially during the summer time when I'm on school vacation. Cringe as it is to admit, it's been a huge part of my life for years.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

Yes, particularly in my early days when I was exclusively a history blog. But it was over something silly, like a Historical AU me and a friend had created, not about anything factual.

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts

Not reblogging anything I don't want to. Guilt tripping isn't cool. -> Keeping Norrie's answer, because same.

16. do you like tag games?

I do! I love talking about myself and sharing my interests with people. I could answer questions for hours tbh!

17. do you like ask games?

It can depend on what the theme of the questions are. But like I said above, yes, usually I enjoy answering ask games.

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

I honestly couldn't say! Maybe Virginia, I suppose.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

I crush on all my mutuals🥰 -> Also keeping this answer from Norrie, because ABSOLUTELY FREAKING SAME! If we're mutuals, just know I sincerely love you. So grateful for the friendships I've made with all of you!

20. tags

@becauseismellgood, @shvkespearc, @1980s-jean-ralphio, and honestly anyone else who wants to do this!

[cogentranting]

My 2023 Reads

See below for the full list of the books I read and a 1-2 sentence review of each.

Fiction, non-fiction, poetry

Italicized- reread

Cloud Cuckoo Land (Anthony Doerr) - It's like a combination of All the Light We Cannot See, Cloud Atlas and The Book Thief, except not quite as good as any of those. Good, just not as good.

The Stolen Heir (Holly Black) - Highly recommend if YA fantasy romance is your thing

On the Incarnation (Athanasius of Alexander) - one of the foundational works of early Christian theology

Klara and the Sun (Kazuo Ishiguro) - Beautiful, and lovely, and thoughtful and bittersweet

Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, Pearl and Sir Orfeo (Tolkien translation) - technically this is poetry but its also narrative so I grouped it with fiction. Green Knight is very fun. Pearl is quite boring.

The Case Against the Sexual Revolution (Louise Perry) - I highly recommend this, just be cautious because it has some very frank discussions of some very hard topics so there's a whole bunch of language and trigger warnings attached to this recommendation

Justification Reconsidered: Rethinking a Pauline Theme (Stephen Westerholm) - I'm going to be honest-- I don't remember what I thought of this book. It was for school and I also did a bunch of research on the topic and I don't remember what part of that research this constituted.

A Quest for Godliness: The Puritan Vision of the Christian Life (J.I. Packer) - I read a few chapters of this for a research project last year and liked it enough to buy myself a copy and read the whole thing for fun

The Warden and the Wolf King (Andrew Peterson) - Book 3 of this series (this is 4) remains my favorite but this one is really good and is a beautiful culmination of the themes

The Elements of Eloquence (Mark Forsyth) - About as good as a book that is just explaining various rhetorical figures can be.

The Theology of the Book of Revelation (Richard Bauckham) -THIS book right here I want to read again. This book made me fall in love with Revelation.

King of Scars (Leigh Bardugo) -It's the reason why I'm very upset over the cancellation of the Shadow and Bone tv series (because I won't get to see more of my boy Nikolai) but it's fine

The Secular Creed: Engaging Five Contemporary Claims (Rebecca McLaughlin) - A very useful book, very accessible

Rule of Wolves (Leigh Bardugo) - But seriously I love Nikolai and I mostly really enjoyed this duology.

The Waste Land and Other Early Poems (T.S. Eliot) - So many words saying so many things and maybe I'll know what they mean if I read this another 30 or 40 times.

Notes From Underground (Fyodor Dostoevsky) - Very different from other Dostoevsky but fascinating in its own way

The Scarlet Pimpernel (Emmuska Orczy) - It's a romp

Calvinism: A Southern Baptist Dialogue - genuinely very very helpful to me and just randomly was emailed to me as a pdf by some site that I ended up on the email list for

The Great Hunt (Robert Jordan) - I do not have faith in this series being good over time but at book 2 they're fun

Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen) -It really is that good.

Original Sin: A Cultural History (Alan Jacobs) - a really interesting exploration of the idea

Out of the Silent Planet (C.S. Lewis) - The Space Trilogy is great because it just has such a different feel from most of the other sci fi I've read

Gay Girl, Good God: The Story of Who I Was and Who God Has Always Been (Jackie Hill Perry) - Perry has such a lovely poetic way of telling her story

Booked: Literature in the Soul of Me (Karen Swallow Prior) - This book is really lovely and peaceful and reflective

A Wizard of Earthsea (Ursula K. Le Guin) -honestly was not very impressed by this. It was fine.

Anna Karenina (Leo Tolstoy) - If you're really into the Russian classics, I would recommend this, but there's like 6 others I would recommend first.

Firefly: Big Damn Hero (James Lovegrove, Nancy Holder) -If you want the book equivalent of a solid but not stand-out filler episode of Firefly

The Hidden Girl and Other Stories (Ken Liu) -I ranked all of the short stories in this on my blog if you search for it. Some are great. Some are not.

All the Light We Cannot See (Anthony Doerr) - It's really really good. A book you just want to sit with.

The Chalice of the Gods (Rick Riordan) - Kinda the same vibe as the Firefly one. It's good to see Percy again, it's a fun time, it's not taking any big swings or doing anything particularly new. But I did really enjoy the thematic linking of which gods were chosen to be a part of the story.

Dracula (Bram Stoker) - It's Tumblr, I don't need to review this here.

Biblical Critical Theory: How The Bible's Unfolding Story Makes Sense of Modern Life and Culture (Christopher Watkin) - This book is really big but it has so much good stuff in it. Well worth the read.

An Experiment in Criticism (C.S. Lewis) - There was quite I while through this one where I was not really jiving with it, but then at the end he pulls it together and I really like where he ends up, as evidenced by quoting half of it on posts here.

Poems (C.S. Lewis) - I'm not good enough at reading poetry to review it. There's a few in here that I quite liked though.

For teaching-

1. The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald)- it's still great. After reading it who knows how many times, it's just so good.

2. The Crucible (Arthur Miller)- The character work in here is fantastic, and I really do like it a lot, but if Miller understood grace a bit better? the ending could be phenomenal.

3. Long Way Gone (Ishmael Beah)- It's not my favorite but it is really powerful and worth reading and the kids were really invested in it

[ferociousconscience]

#1, #4, #25 character meme for Javert?

Original ask game post is here - Please do send me more! LM characters greatly preferred, but I'll take Anna Karenina and other such lit characters, try me!

All for Javert! children_shouting_yay.wav

Why do you like or dislike this character?

Everything? No? Too easy of an answer? Puts hands on my cheeks… Man… I just… I think Javert's so cool. Pathetic in his own way, purposefully ignorant, sad, but cool and confident nonetheless. I looooove characters who are incredibly confident and faithful to something that isn't good for them. I love characters who are misguided but nonetheless noble in their own right. I love characters that double down on the worst versions of themselves, only to have a big crushing crisis later. I could go on. I also just really like detective stories, not only cop dramas but all sorts of mysteries. I think they make for compelling storytelling... I also just really like how he looks, 40-50 years old, masculine, tall, stern, well-dressed, BIIIIG SIDEBURNS (favorite bit tbh), top hat… I really like that sort of thing… Characters with lots of clothes. Big facial hair, collars, hats, and sleeves especially. Pointing at Javert. This is my hole it was made for me

If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

Hmmm… I do think about this a lot, but the answer I have for you is perhaps a bit odd. I've been reading a lot of books lately, and I often think about throwing all the book characters of a general time period into a big crossover hangout. LM, Hugo's other works, Anna Karenina, Phantom of the Opera, all those sorts of books. Putting them all in a box and shaking them around. In particular, I think Javert would be fond of (or perhaps just suck up to) Minister Karenin from AK. "A magistrate is never wrong" etc. I also have a Blade Runner au where Javert is a replicant Blade Runner himself. Maybe one day I'll do art of that!

What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

There are certain characters that have floated into my life through one channel or another that IMMEDIATELY leave a strong impression on me. I will hear a character speak, read a character's intro, or see their design, and it's like a lightbulb of "Oh I am going to fall in love with them, aren't I?" … I say this because Javert was one of those characters. I was very, very young when I saw a production of the LM musical (mom took to me a lot of musicals when i was a baby) and because of my burgeoning uniform appreciation (due to Barbie and the Nutcracker viewing at a critical moment) I saw the Javert come in and was like… Ooooo. I tried to read Les Mis when I was about 10 and simply lost interest somewhere in the MsurM chapters because of how awkward the translation was (it was that godforsaken purple paperback. you know the one). Still, Javert remained in my heart for all this time, albeit in the shadows until the surge of 2012 fandom... let's not talk about that time... and then, now. He's one of the foundational characters in my collection of blorbos. Now, I feel even "closer" to him, insofar as one can get close to a fictional character. The previous bouts of Javert Appreciation have been naught but fleeting things… Now. I am fully obssessed. This is my final form. Etc.

[neiptune]

ok so, sry for answering in the comments and continuing the conversation here, but the character limits in the comment section had me walking in circles (also sorry for the long text ahead, talking about books always has me rambling)

admittedly i had to google who ferrante is, but now that will definitely be a name i'll look out for the next time i'll go the library- do you have any recommendations? :))

i started regularly reading classics only about three (?) years ago bcs the ones that were written in english i wanted to read in their original language and it took me some time to grow confident enough in my english level to attempt to get through them (as you probably noticed english is not my native language😂) so I have a lot to catch up on!

what i read from dostoevsky i rlly liked (made the mistake to read anna karenina as my first russian novel when i was fifteen - took me some time to get back to russian literature after that)

as cliché as it is, i actually really enjoyed what i read of austen's novels as of now, i just started reading my first murakami so i'm excited to see what that will be like. not (exclusively) but in general i also really enjoy oscar wilde and ocean vuong's works, i have to read a lot for university so during the semester i started reading more short stories and poetry or just light romance or sometimes fantasy novels that don't need my full concentration. or i just reread some of my favourite novels when i was like 15/16 as comfort- what are your comfort books?

sorry againf for the loong text, i hope you have/ had a good day! :)

Please never ever apologize, I love getting messages in my inbox <3 Bonus points if related to books, I've been so excited to reply to this!!!

Yes I absolutely do have one suggestion: please read the my brilliant friend series. I know they're 4 books but after you finish the first one you're not gonna be able to stop: the writing is phenomenal and they have pretty much changed my life. The books tackle female friendship, childhood, competition, adulthood, the post-war stultifying culture of naples, class struggle and so much more in a way that will leave you gasping for air. If you decide to give them a go please let me know, I'd be so happy to hear your opinions! (not going into more detail otherwise this post is going to be 5 pages long lol)

I 100% couldn't tell you're not a native!!! Found myself being a lil jealous of how well spoken you are instead (obviously not a native either here haha) and I must say, I've always read a lot of classics, mostly english literature and mostly bc of school assignments! Lately I've been slacking, there are so many books I bought bc I wanted to enjoy them in their original language but eh, never really touched them again :( I miss being an avid reader and I hope to get back on track this year! I looooove murakami like I know he's problematic but his books have changed my life, especially norwegian wood! I must admit I only read pride and prejudice by austen and didn't like it, also never watched the movie, but I'm willing to give her another go through sense and sensibility eventually :) I'm also trying to step out of my comfort zone and read more fantasy, I really liked the priory of the orange tree and the ninth house! Anddd I also love horror so I should really explore it more, I absolutely love shirley jackson! NOW ONTO COMFORT BOOKS. I'm so sorry but harry potter will always bring comfort to me. JKR can absolutely get fucked but those books shall be held close to my heart forever, they just feel like home. I also non ironically loved the twilight books lmao I'd be absolutely willing to reread! I'm gonna add a few more to the list: little women, the pollyanna series, the hunger games, wuthering heights, the secret history, alice in wonderland, the secret garden and literally any goosebump!!! My turn to apologize for the long ass reply but books are a topic I love too much so I can hardly shut up 🥰

[goodfully]

long time no post.. life updates? grad school really is kicking my butt</3 i finished up my first year tho and am currently taking classes over the summer semester as well. i'm trying to pick myself back up and be more alive again, but it has been difficult honestly hahaha

it's funny bc halfway through last semester, i thought i had to drop out of grad school or else i was going to kms, but here i am still in school and still alive! also ofc with all the protests more recently (free palestine!), i think i was just so drained of everything. on the other hand, i'm happy with the papers i had written in my classes and i just submitted one of them to a philosophy and education conference, i really hope it gets accepted... i also just paid my overdue housing fees and tuition for the summer semester.. LOL help

readings updates? i read milton's "paradise lost" over last semester for a class and it was absolutely brilliant honestly. genuinely i need to read the bible LOL anyway i had started reading iris murdoch's "the black prince" but i haven't been able to continue reading past the nussbaum's intro since my classes started again. i also really desperately want to read steinbeck's "east of eden" hahaha but i only have time to read stuff i have to read for classes. i imagine that i wont be able to finish reading dostoyevsky's "the idiot" and tolstoy's "anna karenina" either until after i graduate... it makes me a little bit sad, i wish i had more time. i guess that's why i haven't posted anything here either, since the reason i made a tumblr account in the first place last year was to ramble about "the brothers karamazov" and "my brilliant friend" and i havent read a single book for fun this year so far</3

admittedly, i've been feeling sooo alone..! one of the things on my summer bucket list is to start seeing a therapist but i still cant get myself to do it hahaha i dont think theres anything a therapist could say to me that i havent already thought about to myself. i think what i actually need is get diagnosed, is it autism or personality issues or ocd..? but what do i know, right! regardless.. i'm also just so busy with my jobs and with my classes and with resting by self isolating in all the times between.

hmm i've gotten five more piercings since the start of the year and i've been somewhat keeping track of time based on when i got my piercings and when i'll get my next one... i don't know what this means but it's just been a little concern of mine that i can't seem to ground myself unless i can feel a part of my body "healing"...

also.. happy pride! global queer liberation! ahh, happy pride to fellow aroace ppl! haha thats another thing ive come to terms with recently. as far as my "summer bucket list" goes besides potentially seeing a therapist, i'd like to kiss somebody, get my hair dyed, get more piercings haha, go to a club wearing just a binder and a mini skirt, get back into learning calc and sketching..! alright, i think that's all for life updates here... tbh this is probably more for me to vent hahaha all the best wishes

[lizziestudieshistory]

Books of 2021 - August

I had a decent reading month in August! Not only did I FINALLY conquer Anna Karenina but I also managed to knock a fair few books of my long term TBR.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by That Woman - a reread that completed my entire series reread. I enjoyed it, found a new love for Severus Snape, and rediscovered a love that had suffered from Rowling herself. I don't want to say too much because Harry Potter isn't exactly under praised!

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone - Okay I KNOW I just finished a reread but I was playing the Harry Potter games from when I was a kid and wanted something to stick on in the background I didn't need to fix my entire attention on... I also wanted to revisit some scenes from this book to follow up some thoughts I'd had in the later novels.

If We Were Villains by M.L. Rio - I ADORED this book! It took me a little while to get into it but once I was hooked it was intense. The drama was intense, the relationships between the main character were beautiful (if a bit twisted), and the love of Shakespeare permeated every page. It was a suspenseful read that came to me exactly at the right time!

I would highly recommend if you love Shakespeare and, for some reason, haven't read this yet, or if you're into dark academia as a literary genre (I actually think it's better than The Secret History!!!) If you don’t love Shakespeare I would recommend familiarising yourself with Julius Caesar, Romeo and Juliet, and King Lear before you resd this one as an awareness of these plays will really help you enjoyment. However, this is definitely one of the best books I've read all year - I absolutely adored it!

The Warden by Anthony Trollop - This was an unexpected boom for me to pick up. It's been sitting on my shelf for a couple of years at this point and I've never felt the urge to pick it up. I knew I wanted to try Trollope and I thought I'd enjoy this because I am a bit too into church politics but I'd never felt particularly motivated to read it - turns out I did really enjoy it!

It's probably not Trollope's best work (although I have nothing to compare it to) and I definitely wouldn't recommend it as a starting place for Trollope unless you do really love church politics. However, I had a great time and really enjoyed the discussion around church abuses, personal responsibility, and the effect unthinking busybodies can have on otherwise content individuals. It was a promising start from Trollope and I'll definitely be reading more in the future!

Agnes Grey by Anne Brontë - Another unexpected read for this month, however, like The Warden I picked this up to help with my momentum through the 1kpagesaug21 readathon. I liked Agnes Grey, it was an interesting little book that I enjoyed reading. The exploration of a governess' life was powerful and eye opening - although it was probably moreso for a Victorian audience than it is today.

However, I felt there was something lacking in Agnes Grey that was present in The Tenant of Wildfell Hall. The characters didn't feel as vivid - even Agnes herself felt flat to me - and her life didn't draw me into the book. I do think the relationships, particularly between Agnes and the children she taught, were very well developed. Children, especially teenaged girls, really are THAT horrible and cruel. But most of Agnes' life didn't interest me that much, her relationship with Mr Weston felt a bit forced (and predictable!) while her happily ever after left me underwhelmed.

The emotionality and passionate heart that's so iconic in the Brontë's work didn't come across in Agnes Grey and I felt a little bit disappointed. It was a good book and I'm glad I read it but The Tenant of Wildfell Hall is definitely the superior Anne Brontë work in my opinion. In Tenant I really feel Anne's passion and anger, which is more in line with my taste.

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy - Okay I literally cannot review Anna Karenina here... It's too much in the space I allow myself, so I'll try to do a full review at some point in the future (don't hold your breath I have a backlog!)

Let's just say I struggled with Anna Karenina. I loved parts and loathed others. It's truly a novel about life and life is not always enjoyable to read about... I think Tolstoy gets lost in the scope of his novels! He does too much, encompasses too many plots, and Anna Karenina really should have been two books, not one.

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke - I'm STILL processing Piranesi, I've been putting off my monthly reviews to try and decide how I feel about it but I just don't know! It's a beautifully written book, the prose is to DIE FOR. Clarke could write about anything and I'd think it was beautifully written.

Yet the book itself is weird, not in a bad way though. It's slow and whimsical - nothing really makes sense until you've uncovered the whole mystery of the House and Piranesi. It was enchanting to read, I really was spellbound, but I'm not sure if it was enjoyable? I found it hard going in places, especially at the beginning where Piranesi was doing nothing for 70 pages! I do think it's worth reading, and I did love the plot (when it actually happened) I just wished it was slightly more to the point in the opening part.