#i've been burned with movies too many times to ever let books let me down in that way. you know

[liebgirl]

i mean. what are even the odds that i would accidentally start a book that contains that. i maybe don't need to be using the filter feature at all now that i think of that. maybe EYE was the one being overcautious right... like there's no way a meticulous researcher of every book i'd want to read like me would by accident stumble into something like that. surely

[juliedrawz]

🌼 Big Info/Update on my "Coco" Book 🌼

So it's almost been a year ...

Wow! What a journey so far! I wanted to take my time to talk to you "every dear one of you who loves my art and follows me" for a bit. Now, this will be a long post so keep that in mind!

I cannot remember a year in which I went through so many changes. I grew a lot mentally and I learned a lot. When I first watched Coco, I didn't know at all what kind of impact it will have on me. I know it did for a whole lot many more than just me. It's not just a movie, it's something that moved my heart in depths I cannot explain. Look, the only movie franchise who ever was able to impact me that deeply was Lord of the Rings/Hobbit, but then Coco came along and well ... Héctor! ... and Ernesto.

But talking about Héctor in every little detail possible is planned for another post. There is so much! And Ernesto even more. Ernesto is actually (has actually) been my biggest surprise this year 🤯 And let me tell you why for a little because this is a important part of this whole post!

Villains. We all know what a villain is. When I first saw Ernesto, I was instantly drawn to his charmful personality. I love mexico! I love mexicans, (they happen to be one of the funniest, kindest and most temperamental ones I ever came across and they understand how to celebrate life and death!) At first, we only see what Ernesto can do without knowing anything just yet. I was blown! Let me get this down, he's a musícan with a inrcedible voice (I have an opera education background so I connect to his trained voice), he's a actor, a showman, he's a phenomenal horseback rider and he's handsome! I don't need to tell you about the punch in the guts you end up having later!

Oh, yes! Something I would say! Seriously! I do act like that whenever I am burning for something! *cough* snowflakes quite recently! It was late and my boss only had 1 client left and it started snowing big flakes and I went full child excited mood "think Ernesto and fireworks" until they hit me with their "Augh, snow! Cold, wet, annoying!" And then I literally turned into this cinematic drama queen telling them about nostalgia and the spirit of christmas! *laugh* Their faces 😆 Bah humbug! Truly!

Can you imagine Ernesto in the role of Ebenezer Scrooge? I can! 😆 Héctor, Ceci and Imelda as the 3 spirits of christmas. Yes sir! I want that for christmas! *cough* aaand I'm rambling! I was talking about my book ... yes ... back to that!

Anyway! Moving on! I've told you before that as an INFP personality it's in my nature anyway to think and feel myself deeper into things (whatever they are) and I need about 2 or 3 rows to analyze and solidifying my opinion. That's what happened with Ernesto. Yes, at first I was "heck this guy!" Mildly said, I did not like Ernesto. One. Bit. I was mad and I, for the first few moments, labled him as a villain too! But then I rewatched and rewatched and rewatched Coco and I analyzed Ernesto. And after I went "wait a dang minute!" I realized, no, this man is certainly not your typical "Bad guy!" And after my Dad "an ex-soldier and chef prison guard" confirmed my analysis, I started researching and studying on human behavior, trauma (PTSD) and especially psyche! Now, I wanted to do this anyway because of Héctor and Imelda but it played into my hands with Ernesto. But it also flipped my whole opinion of him. It is a canon fact, that Héctor and Ernesto grew up together and were like brothers to each other and I had the statement, that Ernesto isn't proud of what he's done. Oh boy did that flip tables for me! Because guess what! A true villian is evil, period. You don't go thinking about any redemption because they are that far gone! And a truly rotten, evil soul does not regret their actions or deeds, they are perfectly fine and content with them. I would love to share my whole Sherlock Holmes 🔎 action I did on Ernesto with you but I can't because that would def. spoil everything that is to come!

Ok, this whole Ernesto case has changed and impacted my book! And not only that. The longer I wrote, I got back my grammar and writing skills (after not truly writing for years!) I improved and only after months and then going back to the first half of my book, I realized that many things weren't the way I wanted them anymore. The plot was now solid (wasn't at first) some age/timeline aspects changed! I tweaked some things! Grammar too. And that means I will need to go over my whole first bunch of chapters eventually!

Now I really know where my book is heading! From beginning to end! I now have the silver lining! That also means, the Title of my book has changed! But I will change it in time, not just yet!

The thing with Ceci 👓

Honestly, when I first included Ceci in my book, I, just like with many things, as I mentioned, had no idea what to do with her! I knew I wanted her in, because of that one scene! She instantly had me with her sassy attitude. And since it was pretty clear that she and Héctor knew each other and that she's been helping him not only once, I knew that there had to be a connection. And so I went with it. But that was still raw and not well thought through. That came fairly quickly though! And by now, Ceci is, next to Imelda one of the main characters! She plays a big role and she will be very important for the future!

My Book - Not just any other Fanfic

I know that everyone has their own opinion, view of things and headcanons. This is mine! But while it is my headcanon, I had the goal from the moment I sat down and decided "I'm going to do this!" To make my book feel as canon as possible. I knew I didn't just want to create yet another "great" fanfiction, I wanted to create something that is way more than just that. Something that could give huge Coco fans like me something back. Something that has an impact, something that shares what I have in my heart at least a little! I wanted to do something that hasn't been done before! And for once, I dedicated myself to it, no matter how long it will take, I will finish it! Oof, didn't that sound like something Héctor would say?

This thing has become my baby! 😂

I wanted to stay "true" to each character, stay in line and make readers go "yep, that's how it all happened" I wanted the characters to stay real and authentic. I didn't want to change them or make them do things that would fall out of their character. I knew I wanted my book to circle around Héctor mainly but the longer I worked on it, the more I understood that Ernesto, Ceci and Imelda are just as much of a part of Héctor! And developing their story, they became a huge part.

I wanted and still want to bring emotions across as if you'd feel them! I also knew and now I know even more, that my book is "in no way" for children! It is in everyway for us adults, for teens at least! Because I go deeper and touch on topics that are scary, painful, harsh and dark. You'll see that even more in chapters to come!

Conclusion ❗️

Since it's a real book I am working on, I realized that it is pretty normal that some chapters take weeks, sometimes even months to write. I understood that it's ok to take my time! And if it ends up taking me 2 or 3 years to finish it. I stopped feeling guilty when I cannot post new content fast enough because it just takes a lot of time and effort. And besides my passions, life happens and continues. Work happens to be exhausting sometimes, not all weekends end up being a free-time for me. And there are family gatherings, normal things to do, as plain as grocery shopping. And recently, christmas. But I appreciate every time I get to work on my book and my art!

-

So, yes, I had to get to this conclution on my own. While it is clear for others. And that has everything to do with my personality. I love pleasing people and making people happy. And by all means, I love love love what I do! If I could I would double my arms and work on more tings faster! Sometimes I wish I could stay home and work on my hobbies only but that isn't going to happen for me.

So at that point. I want to say "Thank you!" AGAIN! For all you guys who have been sticking around so far! For all the kind words! I hope you'll stick around for the next year/years to come and keep Coco alive!

🌼 Coco is timeless 🌼

It is so much more than just bringing across a deep important message! It has earned itself a very special place in my heart! It has caused me to pick up writing again, and it made me pick up my guitar and finally learn it! I will finish telling Héctor's story! And Ernesto's along with it! And I am no longer scared if some might end up hating it or calling me crazy for it! Because, like Héctor said, then I am, un poco loco! And I want to be nothing else!

[stupidfatpenguin]

Hm, so I'm currently focusing on my thesis which means I don't really have energy for writing for fun... but I still spend my breaks reading, and I read a decent amount of fic! Like while eating lunch, or before sleep. When I need to make trips out of town I sometimes let my (British accented) Siri read me some of my older favourites.

So I was thinking I could share what I've been reading lately (since I probably won't be writing too much). Since I'm known for rereading a lot, maybe I can recommend you a gem you haven't encountered yet?

So, yeah. Strap in and keep your hands and feet within the space craft at all times, we're going

Salty's Fic Rec Friday (in space)

And these are some fics I read these past couple of weeks.

Sacred Texts by SushiBurrito @sushiburritonoms | E | Din Djarin/Luke Skywalker | 57k+ | Chapters 5/? WIP | Modern, Librarian AU I usually need to have someone hold my hand before I venture into a modern AU, but I read Sushi's tumblr drabbles featuring librarian Luke being a mess and did not hesitate to hit subscribe when the first chapter hit ao3. Basically, Children's Librarian Luke Skywalker has his day turned upside down when a toddler wanders into the library. Somehow, this ends with him procuring a date

Look, it's a dinluke librarian AU written by a librarian who also just brilliantly merges generations of star wars characters and references into, like, Arizona. This fic has had me smiling so hard, actually laughing out loud, the whole lot. Oh, and it's burning slow... in a really really good way. The pining is top notch. Like this is a WIP that could update a year from now and I'd still pull up to read it. The newest chapter is so good. Open the tab, you'll thank me later.

Like the Dawn by ace_din_djarin @ace-din-djarin | T | Din Djarin/Luke Skywalker | 14k+ | One-Shot In-universe, Soulmate AU Okay okay, this one I feel a bit late to the party for, soulmate AUs are really my guilty pleasure trope, I will read anything that includes the universe saying this pair belongs together. In this one, we're going in with a "first words from your soulmate is written on your skin" setting, and the fic is basically following Din and Luke growing up and pining for the soulmate they still haven't met.... tasty.

If you're looking for something not-too-short-but-not-80k to keep you anticipating these idiots finally meeting and realising that they've been written in the starts, this is the fic for you.

Like Sand Through Fingers by Merrinpippy | T | Din Djarin/Luke Skywalker | 4k+ | One-Shot In-universe, established relationship, hurt/comfort This fic is such a gem. Din and Luke are living on Mandalore here, Luke hasn't ever shown Din his prosthetic hand... until one night he can't sleep and it's time for them to have a talk.

I love the writing style in this so much. It's written from Luke's perspective and you just really get sucked into his feelings, his turmoil, and of course, the very, very sweet ending... the author said hurt and comfort, and oh did they deliver. Rec rec rec!!

Apotheosis by Withercrown @withercrown | Not Rated | Din Djarin & Grogu, Din Djarin/Luke Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Maul | 3k+ | Chapter 1/? WIP | In-universe, Adult Grogu, Mystery In a universe where the Force is gone, Grogu, the last living Mandalorian in the Galaxy, traverses dark space to find out what happened 400 years ago when Din Djarin disappeared.

This is probably one of the fics I anticipate the most at the moment. I love a good mystery, and I love the twist of telling the story from an adult Grogu's perspective! The fic reads like a story book to me. It stimulates so many incredible images of the achingly empty, Force-less world in my head, and with Grogu there it sometimes feels like I'm reading what ghibli movie.. feels like? Does that make sense? Anyways, do join me in my anticipation, I can't wait to solve this mystery.

The Ends And The Means by Mariwrongway @mari-wrongway | G | Din Djarin & the Armorer | 1.8k | One-Shot | Part of a series In-universe, Din Djarin-centric This is the first fic in a series that I'm planning to read (apparently a cut off from the main fic?) and I adore it so much. I'm a sucker for fics exploring Din pre-The Mandalorian, since the lack of information lends to a wide variety of interpretations... but this might be my fav yet. Read this to add to your Din & Armorer head canons!

-

Ok, that's it for this week, I hope you have a wonderful weekend (hopefully with some new reading material?) and that you enjoy in immensely while imagining me, at my desk, salting my theory chapter with my tears.

If you've read any of these, I'm curious to know what you think. Oh and if you drop me a rec in return that fits my likes, maybe I'll read it this week. Much love,

Salty ♡

[emwritesstuff]

as the world caves in | ch. 9 | bucky barnes x reader

synopsis: You are a ghost story. A former Air Force pilot who had her plane shot down by Germany in 1945, but here you were in 2023, alive and frozen in your 25-year-old body.

You haven’t seen Bucky since the 1940’s, before his fall, before you went on a suicide mission only to come back alive. You aren’t sure reliving those memories – and being a living memory of everything the man has lost – is the best for him.

But you and Bucky won’t be apart for long.

This will loosely follow the plot of TFATWS - so spoilers ahead, specially regarding episode six (finale). Thread carefully!

masterlist | AO3

notes:  thank you everyone for your patience with this chapter. I'm dropping this lil shortie so we can get the story moving. Let's go! (warnings: lil' fluff, lil' angst) (word count: 3K) nine: records

Bucky knocked on your door a few weeks later.

It was late, and you were snug in your pajamas, winding down after a long day. With your identity no longer a secret, the government was in the midst of transferring you to something more… hands-on, and definitely less diplomatic, you were assuming; so much for retirement, but you figured 30 years of it had been more time than you could’ve anticipated.

You almost didn’t hear the soft rapping on wood over Vera Lynn’s mellow singing.

When you finally opened it, you found him standing there, wearing tired eyes and a dark coat. “I’m sorry, I know it’s late, but I started walking and I—"

“When I said you’re welcome anytime, Bucky Barnes, I meant any time.”

A tiny fraction of a smile was offered your way, and you grasped it tight against your heart at the same time you do his hand, pulling him inside.

His fingers lingered on yours, but before you could start thinking about it he pulled away, taking a seat at the edge of your couch. “I finished it. The book.”

Bucky answered your question before you could ask it. “I just came from there. The last one– the last name.”

“Well. Are you alright?” You sat next to him, your knee knocking against his, and his gaze went from the floor, to the spot where your legs touched, and then to you. He knitted his eyebrows, seeming a little incredulous you were even asking.

“I will be.” His hands intertwined on the space between his knees, and you placed a hand ton his shoulder, getting him to look at you again.

“Yes, you will. Do you want to talk about it?”

One corner of Bucky’s lip raised up, and he shook his head. “Is that Vera Lynn?”

You smiled, turning to look at your record player as if Vera herself was sitting next to it. “It is. Takes me back, I guess.”

“It’s all we’d listen to at the front.”

Nodding, you wondered for a second if Bucky remembered dancing to We’ll Meet Again the night before he was shipped off. Even if you weren’t the only girl he had danced with then, you still asked yourself if that memory was burned on his mind as it was on yours.

We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when. A short-term promise, made back then by hopeful lovers, friends, family members; you had no idea that those lyrics would prove themselves so literal when you and Bucky mouthed them at each other in the middle of a dancefloor.

You let out a breathy chuckle, standing up and beckoning him to where you kept the rest of your vinyl. “Come on. Vera’s starting to feel a little too nostalgic to me.”

Your record collection was pretty extensive, ranging from things of the good ol’ days from the special editions that were still being released nowadays. Bucky joined you on the floor, and together you started to make your way through decades eternized in discs.

“Marvin Gaye.”

You look up from The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust, finding Bucky making a face at the album he was holding. “It’s really good. Do you want to—”

“No. No more Marvin Gaye.”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “You don’t like him?”

“I like Marvin Gaye! Jesus. Marvin is good—Marvin’s jus’ fine,” Bucky rubbed his eyes with his thumb and middle finger, and you finally understood.

“Sam’s been preaching you the word of R&B to you too, huh?”

You giggled at the tired look he gave you and silently took Trouble Man out of his hands, stuffing it back with the rest of the 1970’s.

Years ago, Bucky would be delighted to dive headfirst in the new – your trips to countless science fairs and expositions were enough proof of that – but looking at him now, knowing him as you were starting to once again, you figured that just a dip of the toes was more than enough.

You pulled Frank Sinatra from the 1950’s section.

“I know Sinatra.”

“Do you now?”

You put the record on your player, and Vera Lynn’s longing gave way to Sinatra’s swagger and jazz.

“Do you?” Bucky teased, frowning at the most recent items in your collection. As soon as Frank’s voice filled the silence, he nodded. “Yeah, that’s nice.”

“I do know him! Or did. Met ‘im in 1962.” You plopped next to Bucky, who was shaking his head. “What?”

“Show off.”

“No, just been around. Met people on the way. And, you asked.” Your smirk grew into a grin as Bucky mouthed your words back at you. Then his face fell for a second, and your amusement was quickly replaced by worry. “What is it?”

“Nothing, I guess – I guess I just missed a lot.” The same way one of the corners of his lips tug on his cheek again in his attempt of a smile, melancholy tugs at your heartstrings. “I missed out on everything. And I missed out on you.”

Bucky’s head was low as he spoke and you could see the tremble of his hands, even though he clutched one of your records tightly. Nina Simone, 1960’s.

“M’not going anywhere, you know.”

“You still lived an entire lifetime—”

“I did, yes, thank you for constantly reminding me that I’m over 100 years old.” You shook your head at him, sighing softly when he chuckled.

You couldn’t blame him, for clinging to every bit of past he’d missed while he was in HYDRA’s clutches – you knew that was inevitable, but you wished that such sorrow wasn’t so related to you.

“What are you doin’?” He asked as you summoned a small stool from the side of your shelf and stepped on it.

“I want to show you somethin’.” The thing you were looking for was stored at the very top: a heavy, brown leather suitcase that almost made you lose your balance when you pulled it from the spot it had been sitting in for—honestly, years, many of them.

The contents of the suitcase rattled as you climbed down and sat next to Bucky again. Sinatra still playing, telling his lover I've got you under my skin, I've got you, deep in the heart of me;

You almost laughed from the truth and irony of it.

I'd tried so, not to give in

I said to myself this affair never will go so well

You unlocked the suitcase, revealing the gathered memories inside. Pictures, movie tickets, theater playbooks, receipts, trinkets. All souvenirs of the 80 something years of your life Bucky hadn’t been there to see.

Not organized in the slightest, the keepsakes of your life were tossed together and out of order just as in your memory: photographs of you in uniform, and sometimes in party dresses; of when you bought your house; of the few times you had pets. Posing next to famous people and other important ones whose names weren’t as well known by the world.

As you and Bucky went through each of them, you added a story or an explanation, sometimes both, to fill him in on the details of your life events. He laughed at some, frowned at a lot, stared at you intently for all of them.

“Is this Berlin?”

You hummed, nodding. “1989. That party was great.”

“Party?” Bucky knitted his eyebrows in surprise.

“The city was unified, the wall was being taken down, and everyone was celebrating. I’ve never seen that many bottles of vodka in one place.” You laughed, taking a good look at yourself in the picture.

The 80’s were definitely not your best decade, looks wise. You had tried a perm the year before, and the poodle look was only then starting to dial down. The beginnings of a bruise were starting to creep on your left eye, from the mission you had completed just a few hours before.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been that drunk.”

Bucky’s surprise intensified, his eyes wide. “We can’t get drunk.”

“Yes we can.”

“No, no we can’t.”

“We can, in fact. It’s all a matter of quantity and, well, speed.” You giggled as Bucky’s mouth gaped more.

“And the hangover?”

“Horrible. Like getting shot on the forehead. Comes quickly, too.”

He grimaced, and with one last look – certainly to register your peculiar appearance on his mind – gently put the picture back inside the suitcase. A stack of papers seemed to call out to him and he picked it up, releasing them from the band that held them together carefully.

Postcards of the places you’ve been: a small note to James Barnes and Steve Rogers on the back of each one.

Bucky’s voice faltered. He let out an anguished little sound, probably something that was supposed to be an Oh, or a What, but had no strength to crawl up his throat.

You brought your knees to your chest as you waited for him.

“You—you wrote to us?”

“I did. You can keep those, they’re addressed to you.”

After all this time, you could barely remember the words you wrote in those postcards; all you knew was that some had longer messages, others a simple Wish you were here.

“After we met in Baltimore, I thought that— that you’d have moved on from us.”

From me.

As if that was possible.

“Well, I stopped writing by 2003, give or take. But really,” You sighed. “It’s hard to forget someone when you’ve always been expecting them to come back to you.”

Bucky flipped the postcard from Rome, read the writing and smiled wistfully at it. “And, I did.”

“You did. And staying away was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but—”

“But you’re annoyingly stubborn.” His jaw tightened, then relaxed when he smirked. “I mean, I get it – If the roles were reversed, I’d leave you rebuild your life without me like a self-sacrificing idiot too.”

Alright. That was fair.

Shaking your head, you watched as he slipped the postcards in his pocket, an amused expression on his face.

“That was… a big mistake. Something a self-sacrificing idiot would do,” You screwed your eyes shut in shame, opening them when Bucky chuckled. “but now, I’m right here. And so are you.”

His stubble scratched the soft skin of your palm when you reached for him, and you continued. “We’re a little out of place in this century, that much is true, but if I’m being honest… I’m getting tired of yearning for the past, Buck.”

Good old times – sometimes really good, sometimes bad, every one of them old – tucked away in your heart like your records were tucked in neatly in their shelf, organized by year. As you went through the decades, your enhanced body eternizing you like marble, your heart seemingly stayed at that army camp overseas. Or maybe Sergeant Bucky Barnes had taken it with him, only for them to be frozen together, leaving you with an empty hole in your chest.

You lived your life longing for that missing piece, the one with blue eyes and the dashing smile and the skilled feet.

The one that in many other stories was the one that got away, the one who now believed he was somebody else, but had brought your heart back with him all the same.

The very heart that nearly leapt out of your chest when Bucky rested his forehead against yours.

You’ve never been this close – there isn’t an ounce of past in the gesture. His eyes being tightly closed kept him from seeing the surprise on your eyes and then how they fell to his lips for a millisecond. Then, those lips brushed against yours in a featherlike touch.

I would sacrifice anything, come what might

For the sake of having you near

He pried himself off you when you exhaled, as if your very breath had electrocuted him.

“M’sorry. I—I didn’t—” He said as you stared at the back of his neck, and the shock gives way to disappointment.

I didn’t mean to. Or maybe: I didn’t want to.

“That’s—it’s okay.” You clapped your hands on your knees, still feeling the prickle of his facial hair on them, and got up to change the music.

There was no doubt Bucky was touch starved, and that he probably craved the closeness that comes with a lover. He sought that for a fleeting second in Sam’s sister, and now in you. No point in dwelling on what it might have meant.

Right?

Looking at Bucky, his expression was overcast, furrowed eyebrows as he watched you from his spot on the floor. You offered him a gentle smile, and the crease on his forehead eased up slightly.

Right.

Don't you know little fool, you never can win

The record player made a scratching sound as you replaced Frank Sinatra with your go-to jazz compilation. Instrumental.

No lyrics.

There was one thing you’ve always been good at, regarding the infatuation with Bucky Barnes that has taken over your heart for almost a century now: locking the feelings away and stepping into the shoes of the best friend.

Besides, you’ve said it yourself: no more yearning for the past. Hopefully you and Bucky would be able to do that soon enough.

At that moment, however, you needed to feel the burn of whiskey down your throat and pretend it’ll heal the calcinating rejection spreading through your chest.

The guilt you found in Bucky’s eyes as he watched you sweep around your hardwood floors made you pour a glass for him.

He took it gratefully, frowning when you bottomed the whole thing up.

“There’s a lot in here.” He tapped the edge of the suitcase, skillfully steering the conversation in the direction of the more palatable, calm territory it was in before.

The sight of your autobiographical collection made you smile.

“An entire lifetime,” You said, fishing your dog tags from the bottom. “I suppose that’s where it started. Or at least, where thisstarted.”

Bucky took them reverentially, running his thumb over the imprint of your name and numbers.

He reached for his neck, producing from under his Henley the same type of metal chain he was holding in his hands. The fact that he still wore his like that sent a sharp blow to your lungs, almost knocking the air out of you.

His face softened, a smile so beautiful spreading across his lips, so much that your chest clenched in protest because it was simply not fair, how he still had you entirely.

He deposited both of your dog tags in your hands, and that’s when you saw it, and remembered it.

“Won’t we get in trouble for this?”

“Do you care?”

“Well…No.” You sighed, already resigned. And a little excited.

Bucky knew you well: it had been too long of being a good little soldier when all you were used to was the rush of being a hellion.

“And that is why, sugar, that I’m doing this with you, and not with Steve.”

The words made your heart soar, but you were sure to recapture it before it could fly away too high, still too attached to the sensation of the take-off to clip its wings.

You liked flying.

“And because Steve hasn’t been successful in his enlisting efforts. Yet.”

Bucky looked at you from behind his eyebrows, a reprimand hiding in his eyes, but he decided to shove his uniform hat on your head instead. You grumbled, calling him a jerk under your breath.

It was the night before Bucky was drafted to England. He looked handsome in his uniform, a shining, polished star, brighter than the sun even under the dim streetlight you two stood under.

After bringing his and Steve’s dates home (yours was lost to another boxing match along the way – not that you were crying about that) Bucky had decided he was going to stay up all night, because, in his words, he could sleep when the war was over. Or, more realistically, in the ship on the way to England.

So there you two were, illuminated by street lamps and moonlight, visiting the façades and front windows of your favorite places in Brooklyn like drifters in the night.

Bucky still concentrated on his task, his shoulder hunched slightly to block your sight.

“Let me see! Bucky!”

“ ’Sposed to be a surprise! I’m almost done.”

You huffed, crossing your arms. “It’s not like I haven’t seen ‘em before.”

“You gotta be more patient. Here.”

He dropped your dog tags on your hand. You displayed the small steel plates on your palm, scanning your eyes over the two. One of them, of course, had your name, number, blood type, next of kin – an aunt you’ve never met – and address.

The other had Bucky’s.

James B Barnes. 32557038.

He slipped his own chain over his head, the plate with your name clinking against his.

You brought the tips of your fingers to your lips, feeling a smile begin to form onto them.

“I forgot we did this. I haven’t looked at these in so long.”

You had stopped wearing your dog tags the day the war had ended – Bucky was gone then, Steve too, and the weight of his dog tags slamming against your chest was too much to bear – your heart was already heavy with its own engraving of their memories.

“Steve had a lecture prepared when he gave mine back.” Bucky chuckled when you looked up at him, incredulous.

You shook your head, half exasperated and half amused. “Good grief, Steve.”

“Y’know how he is. Was,” He trailed, lips twitching as they formed a thin line.

You reached for him, your hand hovering in the space between you for a second before Bucky took it, lacing your fingers. Scooting closer, you let your cheek rest on his shoulder.

“He’d be glad we’re reunited.” You said, raising your head to peek at him and the newfound upwards curl of his lip. “And mortified we’re still bickering.”

Bucky smiled and squeezed your hand. “Old people. Old habits.”

Laughter bubbled out of your chest, and you realized a few things.

In that moment, it didn’t matter – the heartache, the unrequited side of your love. It was just a fact, a fact of life, of your life, that you a lot of the times loved him as more than your best friend. You loved him. And that was the core of it, the most important fact.

And you knew he loved you – you had each other – in this big, ever-changing, modern world, you had Bucky and Bucky had you.

You sat in comfortable, familiar silence until your eyelids grew heavy and you felt yourself drifting in and out of consciousness.

“You dozin’ on me, sugar?”

“It’s been a long day.” You said with your eyes still closed, feeling him chuckle beside you.

“Tell me about it. I can go—”

“You know damn well you should stay.” You patted his arm and hoisted yourself up from the floor. “I’ll get the pull-up ready for you.”

As you sauntered towards the office, ignoring his pleads and protests that he’s got it, he doesn’t need sheets or anything, you put your dog tags back on.

They jingled lightly against your heart.

Maybe you didn’t have to leave all of the past behind to start building something good and new, after all.

[sarcastically-defensive17]

Forget me? Forget us. - B. Hargrove

Inspired by ‘Forget me too’ by MGK and Halsey. I love this song and it has been stuck in my head all day and I couldn’t think of anything but a toxic relationship with billy. This isn’t a happy story, but it is a sad reality of some relationships. Some people are so bad for each other yet their love is too intense. “I love you so much that I hate you” describes this perfectly.

Gif is not mine, nor are the lyrics used within the song or Billy Hargrove. Hope you enjoy!

Let me know if you want to join the Billy taglist, or my general tag list!

Original story by sarcastically-defensive17

TW: This story contains an intense description of a very toxic relationship. In no way do I condone this kind of relationship and I recommend seeking help if you are in a relationship like this and you fear for your safety or that of another.

Billy was dangerous. So was Y/N. She was cold, he was burning hot. They were powerful separate, a raging storm together.

They were made to love one another, but not made to be in love with one another. They were furious, passionate, loving, angry, fearful, high on possibility.

They were inseparable, but couldn’t bare to be with one another.

They were purely paradoxical, and they loved every heart aching second of it.

They had broken up once again, their love blowing up in a fury of broken objects and obscenities. One of their distant friends from high school decided to throw a party, despite her status as post-high school adults. Billy was in attendance, obviously.

Y/N had yet to show up. Her absence elated him, and disappointed him. He loved her. He loved her so much that he couldn’t stand to be around her, for he was too scared to lose it.

Their love was temporary, yet the temporary was permanent.

They were always going to fall apart. They were always going to become one again. They would fall apart soon after. It was a viscous cycle of heartbreak and hopeless love.

He waited for her, drink in hand, clad in tight jeans and a white tank top. His staple denim jacket was missing.

Another woman - Bethany, Billy thought her name was - stood awfully close to him, her bony hand resting on his arm as she spoke. He had no idea what she was saying, he had zoned out almost as soon as she approached him. He had little care to listen to her prattle on. His mind was waiting for one person.

Bethany kept chattering and Billy fought the urge to roll his eyes. He was showing zero interest, yet the woman would not shut up.

Well, she hadn’t, until a hand grabbed her hair and yanked her entire body backwards, until she fell flat on her behind.

Y/N stood behind her, Billy’s jacket draped over her shoulders and a look of pure fury in her eyes.

I saw you walk in the room and I tried my best
Not to panic while I'm lookin' for the back door,

I smelled the perfume and it's obvious, i'm gonna stay and put my key in the bag more.

She wasn’t directing it towards Bethany, no. She was locked and loaded right on Billy.

Flight or fight kicked in, and Billy panicked, but only for a minute.

She looked divine. Wearing his jacket, marks on her neck from their last positive encounter on show for everybody to see.

She smelled like perfection, her chocolate scented perfume drawing him in, filling his senses with her.

She drove him crazy, made him more furious than he could comprehend. They would fight, they would love, they would fall apart.

Her hand connected with his face, yet he wasn’t angry. No. He connected his lips with hers, feeling her fingers slide through his hair. All eyes were on them, yet everybody had seen this scene before.

They were possessive, they were horrible to one another and others, but god help anybody who messed with their relationship. Only they could crumble the walls that they build.

She pulled back from him, smirking, watching as he bit his lip with temptation.

“Missed me baby?” She winked at him, allowing his body to pull hers along as he grabbed her hand and started leading her outside.

She may be the reason that his small apartment had a broken window and multiple holes in the wall, but he sure as hell didn’t hesitate to follow her to wherever she led.

The alcohol wore off by the time he woke, his head pounding and his vision spinning.

Her leg was stung over his own, both of them as bare as the day they were born. He rose carefully, moving her body from his as gently as he could.

However, in his efforts to make it out without waking her, he dropped his belt, and the clatter of the buckle on the hardwood floor caused her to snap awake.

It escalated quickly.

You want me to forget you? Okay, forget me too.

You tell me you hate me, baby, yeah, I bet you do

“You’re such a fucking asshole, Hargrove!” She shoved at his shoulder, trying to get past him so she could get to the bathroom. He was blocking her way.

“Oh, of course. I’m the asshole.” He snarled, a smile on his face. You’re the one who starts screaming at me, but I’m the one in the wrong!”

“You’re in the wrong because you ducking broke up with me, then tried to skip out before I woke up.” Her hands were in her hair, grasping at the roots. “You’re so fucking selfish. I’m waiting around constantly for you, but I make you wait one fucking time and you’re throwing a tantrum!”

“You left me waiting for an hour, Y/N! What, were you out with Tommy? What about Stevie? You always had a soft spot for him.” They were malicious. They knew how to hurt one another and they both knew it.

“God, you’re such a joke.” She laughed in his face, shoving her shoulder against his so she could grab her stuff from the bathroom. “Sometimes I wish I could forget I ever fucking met you, Billy.”

“You wouldn’t survive without me holding your hand, princess.” He snarled, perfect lips turning up to show perfect teeth.

They connected once again, pulling at one another, crashing into the wall, the door frame, the bed.

“I hate your fucking guts,” she growled, pulling his shirt over his head.

“I know you do, baby.” He flipped them over so his body was covering her own and connecting his lips to hers once again.

I've wasted so much time waitin' around for your phone calls every night

She would sit by the phone every night, waiting for his call. She would excuse some night, knowing if his terrible home life, but when he got his own place, he rarely called, rarely picked up the phone.

She spent so many days, so many nights, waiting up on him.

She got her own back at him.

He was taking her to see a new movie, planning to meet her at the arcade next to the theatre at 6 o’clock. He had to drop the bratty step-sister off, so he figured two birds.

He waited there until an hour later, the movie already beginning. He was seething. He hated being stood up, and she knew it.

Y/N arrived at the theatre 15 minutes later, but there was no Billy in sight, nor his sleek camaro.

She drove to his apartment, furious yet also proud. She gave him a taste of his own medicine, and she couldn’t wait to see how frustrated he was. She hated hurting him, but he hurt her just as bad.

We'd both be better off alone.

Still think I'd get you on the phone with one last breath in me.

I'd die before I let you leave

He had already downed five beers by the time she got there. It was rare for her to see him sober, and it was rare for him to see her while he was sober.

It escalated as soon as she walked in the door, slamming the heavy wood behind her.

“I was waiting for you and you didn’t bother to fucking show up!” He took a drag of his cigarette, blowing the smoke in her direction. She hated when he smoked, she despised the smell of nicotine on his breath but found the sight of him smoking to be incredibly attractive.

She fell for his bad boy side, and found home in his caring heart and troubled personality. It was a broken home but she couldn’t bare to leave.

The argument grew more and more, she threw a phone book at him, sending it through the window in his living room.

“I’m done. I’m sick of the bullshit, Y/N. We’re fucking better off alone!” He slammed his hand on the table, silencing her shouts of obscenities at him.

She laughed, slumping down onto the beat up couch. They had been saving money every paycheck to get him some new furniture. Y/N had also been putting money away to get her own apartment, despite Billy’s offer for her to live with him.

Such a volatile and temporary relationship couldn’t withstand constantly being in the presence of one another.

“We would die before we ever give up on one another, Billy.”

Tell me why you do the things that make me hate you,

It's an emotional kaleidoscope when I face you,

Permanent calligraphy, I just tattooed your name on me forever, fuck

Y/N and Billy love each other intensely, but they also know exactly how to make the other hate them.

It was a horrible cycle, yet nobody could make them happier than the person they hated the most.

Even if they wanted to forget one another, they could never forget the love they shared.

Tag List: @snookiebrookie (because you’re always so kind)

Let me know if you want to join the billy taglist!

[1a-imagines]

Hey! I have no idea if your requests are open, so if they're not, all I'd like to say is that I've been reading your stuff nonstop for like three days and I'm hooked! Your writing is amazing, thank you for sharing your talents! If requests are open, I'd like to make one, if it's not too much trouble? You wrote a request for: /Could we have some soft bakugou please? (Begs s/o to stop he just to give him attention and kisses)/ and I loved it! Could you do a Todoroki version if it's not too much?

A/n: Some soft todoroki for your souls.

Coming right up!!

I wrote this when sleepy so god knows how it turned out, but i hope you enjoy anyway!

Todoroki:

A larger hand placed itself atop of your own, stopping your pencil from moving against the paper. Your eyes followed the arm until you came face to face with your boyfriend staring down at you.

"Shoto? What's wrong?" You asked. He never interrupted you when you were studying, unless it was something urgent.

You watched his eyes shift away, his lip pursing ever so slightly. The strange and rare expression on his face only made you more curious. "You've been working for hours. You should take a break."

You tilted your head at his strange behaviour. It almost looked like he was pouting, but you figured you were just imagining it. After all, you'd never known Shoto to pout over anything before.

You used your free hand to pull him off of you so you could get back to your work. You made sure to place a kiss on his hand before letting it go. "I'll take a break later, I have a lot that I want to finish right now."

You turned back to your book, the pencil moving against paper again as you went back to your studies.

You were too focused on your notes to notice that Shoto still hadn't moved. He stood besides with an unreadable expression.

He didn't know what was wrong with him, an unfamiliar feeling had started to settle in his stomach about ten minutes ago. It all started when he looked up at you from his book and noticed you were still hard at work. It was like he was suddenly more aware of the fact you had barely paid him any attention all day, having been too busy with studying.

It was currently around 8pm and usually you two would be cuddling on the bed by now. Whether you were watching a movie together or doing your own things, you would always be sat side by side, his arm loosely wrapped around your waist as your head rested on his shoulder. It was how he liked to spend all his evenings, and after months of this ritual he had come to expect your affection.

But this time he wasn’t getting what he wanted.

He was aware it seemed childish, it made him feel like a spoiled brat to be pouting over something so insignificant, but he wasn’t sure how to get the feeling to go away. He was craving your attention and you were too busy studying to notice.

It was all because of that damn book you were studying from.

Now, don't get him wrong. He was more than supportive of your studies. He even went out of his way to test you whenever you needed it, using flashcards to help you retain the knowledge. He would also make food for you and remind you to take breaks as well.

He was always there for you.

Although, for some reason… right now he wanted nothing more than to throw that book across the room and throw you onto the bed.

Of course, he would never actually do that but the thought had crossed his mind a few times.

He huffed through his nose, when he realised he should probably just let it go. He didn't want to upset you, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could wait for you to be finished with work.

His huff had caught your attention and it broke your concentration.

You turned your head and watched as your boyfriend trudged over to the bed. You raised an eyebrow at his odd behaviour, your lip twitching up as you put your elbow over the back of the chair. "Did you seriously just huff?"

"No." He fell onto the bed, keeping his head turned from you. Though that didn't stop you from noticing his left cheek was puffed out a bit.

You couldn't help but giggle when you pieced together why he was being huffy.

You stood up and made your way over to the bed with your hands held behind your back. "Aw~ baby, what's made you so pouty?"

Of course, you already knew why, but you still wanted him to admit to it.

"I'm not pouting.."

"Uh huh." You sang teasingly.

You kneeled onto the bed, reaching over to pet his soft hair. "So you're not pouting because i'm not giving you attention?"

"No."

"So then you don't want to cuddle?"

"...."

You didn't need an answer, his silence said enough. You let out another laugh before laying down on top of him and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

You still had work you wanted to finish tonight but a small break to satisfy your boyfriends need’s wouldn’t kill you. There was no way you could live with yourself if you left your boyfriend alone right now. It was clear he was in some dire need of hugs and kisses.

Luckily for him, you had the cure.

It didn't take a second longer for his arm to encase you in a possessive hug, keeping you warmly pressed against his chest. "Honey, if you want cuddles or kisses you can just ask for them you know? There's no need to pout."

"I told you I wasn't pouting." was he really still denying it?

You giggled again. "Don't be embarrassed, I think it's cute."

His gaze went to the wall, as if to avoid you at all costs. "Are you done trying to tease me?"

"Depends, is it working?" You grinned and tilted your head upwards to be met with his red stained cheeks. You no longer needed him to answer to know that it was.

His expression was so cute, it looked like he was trying to be annoyed but his eyes were giving him away. He was too happy with having you back in his arms to be annoyed.

You leaned up and pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose. "I'd be lying if I said this side of you wasn't sweet though."

"You like seeing me jealous?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Well- when it's over a dumb book? Yes." You snickered.

He stared down at you, his eyes burning into your own. For a moment, you thought he was going to kiss you, but he ended up abruptly turning his head away. These new feelings he had must have really hurt his pride. "I always want your attention.."

"Hmm? What was that?" You leaned in close, your nose brushing against his when you tilted your head so you were back in his field of vision. You didn't want to miss any of these rare expressions. You had to memorise them all while you had the chance!

He pushed your face away from him. "Stop it, I know you heard me." Your playfulness made him smile and for a second you thought your heart had melted.

He had such a nice smile and it always felt more special when you were the cause of it.

He loved how you were able to effortlessly put a smile on his face, something he usually struggled with. You were like the missing piece in his life he had always been looking for. Even hearing your laugh made his lips curl up. It was such a melodic tune to his ears.

Your playfulness had been one of the first things he found so alluring about you. There was just something so endearing about seeing you making everyone around you smile with your cheesy jokes and goofy behaviour. It made you feel like a bright star on a cold dark night.

"I did hear you, but you can't blame me for wanting to indulge in the moment. You're acting like a big softie right now, not that there's anything wrong with that! But don't judge me for taking advantage." You stuck out your tongue only to have your cheeks squished between his two hands.

"Are you sure you want to play this game, love? You know you'll never win."

He was right, you were already blushing at the thought of him teasing you.

Strangely enough, he was pretty good at it. You had been dating for a while now and it seemed as every day passed by shoto was learning more and more about how relationships worked. He was getting comfortable being around you which meant confidence and teasing were following close behind it.

Maybe that was your fault though, maybe he had picked up that habit from you after almost a year of you doing that same thing to him.

He just couldn't seem to get enough of that cute expression you made when he was teasing you about how adorable you are, or the height difference between you two.

He only would ever tease you when the two of you were alone, so it was never too embarrassing.

However, no matter how many times you tried to tell the others about how teasing he could be, they never believed you. Not like you would believe it either. The first time he had done it you had to do a double take, not sure if you had heard him right, so it was understandable everyone else thought you were just joking.

If you were completely honest, you weren’t even sure he knew he was doing it most of the time. He was blunt and sometimes he would say things without giving them a second thought, despite them leaving you a red, hot, mess.

“I don’t need to win, I just need to see you blush.” you replied as you felt his hands grab your own and intertwine your fingers together.

Making him blush was easier said than done.

He wasn't particularly smooth with his words or feelings, but he was still much better at making you blush than you were at making him blush.

In your defense your flirtations usually went over his head. You’d either be met with a blank stare of confusion or he would be correcting you if he had taken what you had said literally. It was actually really cute. Despite him never understanding you'd be a liar if you said you didn't still enjoy his reactions. They just seemed so innocent!

"I don't understand your fascination with making me blush."

"I just think it's cute is all." You kissed his nose before going back to rest on his chest.

You two managed to stay like that for hours, your studying had been temporarily forgotten as you both lay there in a blissful silence.

It was so comfortable, he was warm and you loved being able to rub your face into his chest. Neither of you talked a whole lot, mainly it was just cuddling and relaxing in each other's arms. Which is, honestly, how you preferred it. You didn’t need to fill every silence with conversation, you were able to just relax without things becoming awkward.

After waiting another 30 minutes you realised you should at least try and finish the chapter you were on before passing out for the night.  

You peaked up to see Shoto’s eyes were closed. His steady breathing indicated he was fast asleep and you grinned.

Finally, you could finish that damn work now! It might be late but it would bug you all night if you didn’t finish what you started.

Plus it meant less work to do tomorrow morning.

You slowly and carefully pushed yourself up onto all fours, trying your best not to disturb him as you pulled his arms from around you and placed them down by his sides.

He looked so peaceful.

You couldn’t help but press one last sweet kiss to his cheek before you pushed yourself up.

Though you didn’t make it far. You felt his hand shoot out and grab you by your waist.

You let out a yelp when he pulled you back down onto his chest and rolled over so you were under him with no means of escape.

“Oh! Haha, you’re hilarious!" You groaned sarcastically. "But I still have work to finish.”

You groaned again at the weight on top of you. Trying your best to wiggle out of his tight grip. When you didn’t hear a response you looked up to see his eyes were still closed.

You glared.

“Don’t pretend you didn’t hear me! I know you're awake! I have to finish my work! Get off me you lazy butt!” You began to struggle to push him off of you but he was persistent not to move. His whole weight was leaning down on top of you, keeping you helplessly trapped against the mattress.

After a good few minutes of trying to grab at freedom you eventually sighed and gave up. He was too heavy!

There was just no winning with him today.

“Fine.. I guess I’ll finish my work in the morning.” You muttered, finally giving in.

“Was that so hard?”

“I knew you were awake!! You sneaky little mmph-” You were cut off by the feeling of his lips on yours. “You need sleep anyway, you’ve been working too hard. I promise I’ll help you study in the morning. Just sleep with me right now, I missed you today."

How could you say no to that!? He was just too cute!! Especially when he got sleepy like this. You managed to wiggle out an arm so you could reach up to run your fingers through his locks. You heard him hum in delight, he always did like the feeling of your fingers softly massaging his scalp "Fine. Let's sleep then."

You could see him smile in victory at hearing you had finally given in.

"Goodnight darling, I love you.”

You nuzzled his cheek with your nose and let your eyes flutter shut.

“I love you too.”

[nothingbutfangirlsmut]

The Trials of Emi

Pairing: A little Minho. A sprinkle of Frypan. Gally x Emi(OC)

Summary: Emi, her twin brother Thomas, and a small group of gladers had been rescued and taken to a safe haven. Or so it seemed. It doesn't take long for Thomas to realize something is wrong. What happens next is a true trial for all of them but Emi's trials began the moment she was ripped away from a dying Gally. Watching someone you love die right before your eyes truly takes a toll.

Finally meeting the right arm could have been the end but betrayal leads to even more chaos and loss. A new mission to rescue those taken from them leads them to a city. The last city. After Emi finally comes to terms with everything that's happened something unfolds that changes everything again. She will have to not only deal with helping her brother take down WCKD and save their friend but also deal with all the new problems in her head and her heart.

Rating: As of right now it’s at most PG13. Some strong language that’s about it but it could change.

(This is the 2nd part/book to my other story "The Maze trials: A Gally Fanfiction". This will cover the events of the scorch trails and the death cure.)

Chapter Eighteen

Gally opened the door so we could walk back out to the others. Just as he stepped out the door I grabbed his hand. I saw the smile spread on his face as he walked back out to the group with his hand in mine. My eyes met Fry's immediately. He smiled as he looked down at our hands. To my surprise Gally walked straight over to Fry. Gally extended his hand to the other boy.

"Thank you Fry" he said as they shook hands.

Fry raised a brow at him.

"For taking care of her. For being there for her. For everything." Gally said as he let go of Fry's hand.

Fry nodded. The sound of footsteps had me turning around. Thomas and Newt stepped off the stairs. Thomas had his arm tightly around the blonde boy. Something was wrong. I could see it in both their faces.

"I'm in" Thomas told Gally as the two boys stopped in front of us.

I pulled my hand from Gally so I could step over to Newt. I grabbed his face making him look up at me.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I searched his eyes.

He gave me a small sad smile. He stepped back then slowly pulled the sleeve of his jacket up. What I saw made my heart plummet to the floor. He's infected. He's sick.

"No" I whispered as I grabbed his arm.

"Don't worry about me love. I'm good. It's fine." Newt said softly.

I hugged him tightly. We can find something. Thomas' blood helped Brenda. It can do the same for Newt.

"Are you ready?" Gally asked from behind me.

I turned to see him talking to Thomas. My brother nodded then stepped back over to Newt. He pulled the blonde away from me. He hugged him tightly then placed his hands on both sides of Newt's face.

"We'll get you better I promise." Thomas whispered.

"Tommy, stop making all these promises." Newt whispered with a small smile.

Thomas chuckled softly then pressed his lips to Newt's. I couldn't help but smile at the sight. I had never seen them kiss before but everything both of them felt was clear to everyone.

"Ok, I'm ready." Thomas said as he stepped away from Newt.

"Hey" I said pulling Gally back by his hand.

He turned to face me. I grabbed his shirt to pull him closer.

"You be careful out there and keep an eye on my brother for me please." I told him softly.

"You got it" he smiled down at me.

He placed a soft kissed to my temple then jogged away to catch up with Thomas who was already in the other room.

"You two are getting along great I see." Newt smiled as he came to stand next to me.

"Yea" I smiled.

I grabbed Newt's arm that showed the infection spreading through his veins. I softly ran my fingers over it. Newt sighed then pulled his arm from me. He shoved the sleeve of his jacket back down to hide his arm.

"I'm fine Emi. Seriously, don't worry about it." He said then patted my cheek.

How can I not worry? Newt had been my best friend for years now. Granted we haven't been as close recently due to him and Thomas and everything else going on but that doesn't change a thing. The people in this room and the two idiots that just left are my family. I'd lost and gained family and from this point on I was more than determined not to loose anymore. Now that I've gained so much back I can't loose anything else. I'll burn WCKD and every supporter they have to the ground if I have to. I'll do whatever it takes.

"So, this Gally guy was the one you told us about?" Jorge asked stepping over to me.

"Yea, that's him" I said with a smile.

After a few minutes of sitting the group decided to wait in the room Gally and Thomas had left through. We sat around the table silently waiting for their return. The moment I heard the metal cover shift I knew they were back. Fry and I ran over to the cover to help move it. Thomas was the first one out. Next was Teresa with a bag over her head. Both Gally and Thomas were helping her climb up. As soon as Gally replaced the cover he grabbed Teresa then roughly shoved her down into a chair. Thomas sat in a seat next to the table beside Newt. Gally pulled the bag off of Teresa's head then walked over to the table to lean against it. I stood between my brother and Gally. Teresa took a moment to look around the room at each face that was staring at her until she landed on Gally.

"Gally?" She questioned in surprise.

He sighed as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Here's how this is gonna go. We're gonna ask you some questions, and you're gonna tell us exactly what we need to know. If you don't, Emi is more than happy to make you. We'll start off simple. Where's Minho?" Gally asked as he stared Teresa down.

Teresa immediately turned to Thomas.

"You guys don't seriously think-" She started to say.

Gally grabbed a chair then slammed it down in front of her. He sat down in it blocking her view of Thomas.

"Don't look at him. Why are you looking at him? Look at me. He's not gonna help you. Now, we know you have Minho in the building. Where?" Gally asked radiating the most command I've ever seen from him.

I couldn't lie it was pretty hot to see him like this.

"He's with the others in holding. Sublevel three." Teresa said quietly.

"How many others?" Newt asked.

"28" Teresa said simply.

We all turned to look at Brenda. She was over our transportation to get out of there.

"I can make that work." She said with a shrug.

"No. No, you guys don't understand. The whole level's restricted. You can't get in without a thumbprint ID." Teresa explained.

All we need is a thumbprint? Well, I could handle that quick and easy.

"That's why you're gonna come with us." Thomas said.

"Well, I don't know. We don't necessarily need her." Gally said as he stood from the chair.

"Right?" He asked as he walked over to the table beside me.

"Not all of her." He said as he grabbed the small knife from the table.

I smiled at his action. Oh yes, please, cut that bitch.

"We just need her finger." Gally said as he turned back to face Teresa.

"Gally back off." Thomas said softly but sternly.

I turned to look at Thomas in utter disbelief. Is he seriously still going to protect her?

"What, are you squeamish? I guarantee you she's done a lot worse to Minho." Gally said angrily.

"I agree. I want to see her bleed." I said with a smile as I glared at her.

"That's not the plan. Back off. Both of you." Thomas said as he stood from his seat.

"It won't make a difference. Do whatever you want to me. You still won't get through the front door. The sensors will pick you up." Teresa said harshly.

"We know. We're tagged. Property of WCKD. You're gonna help us with that too." Thomas said as he held the small knife out to her.

Newt was the first to get his tracker cut out. After him was Fry. When he was done I took the seat in front of Teresa for my turn. The boys were sitting around the table several feet away.

"This will sting a bit." She told me quietly.

"Just get it done." I snapped at her.

She was right. It did sting a bit but at this point the pain didn't bother me. I'd had worse.

"So, Gally's alive." She said quietly as she worked on pulling the tracker out.

"We're not doing small talk." I told her.

She sighed.

"I'm sure you probably hate me but I need you and the others to understand why I did what I did." She said.

I chuckled dryly.

"I do hate you. There's no probably about it. You're a pathetic traitorous bitch. If it was up to me I'd take your fingers to use then put your head on a spike right outside the front door of WCKD just to say hello to your best friend Ava. I don't give two shits why you did it. All that matters is you did it. You chose WCKD over your friends. Over your family." I explained darkly.

I wanted to get my point across but keep myself calm at the same time. It was easier said then done.

"You're done" she whispered.

I was immediately on my feet walking back to the table. Gally stood from his seat as I walked over to him. It was his turn now. He handed my a white cloth then walked over to Teresa. I held the cloth against the back of my neck as I sat down.

As soon as Gally was done Thomas took his place. I stood up to give Gally his seat back. When he sat down he pulled me to sit on his lap.

"She enjoyed that." Gally grumbled as he tossed his bloody cloth onto the table.

"You're probably right." Fry chuckled.

—

[act-addict-actors-matchups]

@ne-nene-ne said,

[1/2] Hi~ May I pls have a matchup? I'm a ♏, ISFP, 5'0 fem w/ medium length dark hair & eyes. I like wearing sweaters/sweatpants a lot! I love to draw & sing especially! I'd sing softly to my s/o if we're close & alone together. I often take endless pics of the sunset bc it's so pretty! Tbh I'm a loner. I'm shy, quiet, awkward and I like my alone time. I'm friendly and good-willing towards others nonetheless! I've been told I have a positive aura. I'm more chill, silly & playful w/ family!

[2/2] I can joke around w/ them! I have a short temper but I forgive just as quickly. I can be hard on myself bc I feel it's necessary to improve. I'm an appreciative person so I'll say "thank you" like 1000 times lol! I highly value family & honesty! My ideal s/o is someone family-oriented, devoted, and genuine. Bonus points if they're funny too! I'd like someone who I can slowdance to soft, jazz music w/. My love language is Acts of Service! Tysm! Take your time, stay healthy & stay safe! ❤

✧ Thank you so much for requesting a matchup love. Tumblr is not letting me tag you so hopefully you’ll see this. 😔 I wish you well during this challenging time. Hope you keep safe as well! 😷

I’d match you with: . . .

➜ HOW YOU TWO FIRST MET ; Juza Hyodo is that typical cold guy in school that everyone is lowkey scared of. That’s how he seems from outside anyway. You were asked by your biology teacher to borrow the books for the class’s current lesson from the library on the spot so you took a beeline for the shelves as fast as you could. But for god’s sake all the books were placed at the topmost part of the science shelves. You stood there for a good minute while glaring at the books overhead. You knew you were damned for good since there were no chairs nearby that were available and the librarian was nowhere to be seen. You stomped you feet in annoyance until you felt a looming presence behind you. A tall one. When you turned around, you saw Juza grabbing the books at ease and handing it to you. You thanked him quietly which surprised him because you actually didn’t quiver with fear or panic in his presence??? and you genuinely thanked him?? It was not usual for him to hear someone express their gratitude towards him. Even the cashiers from sweet shops he’d like to visit secretly we’re scared of him for heaven’s sake. After murmuring a little “‘S nothing.” he walked away. And that was the end of it. Or so you thought. The second time you met the purple haired boy was in a cafe. You were patiently waiting in the line for this so called Peanut Butter Pound Cake S'mores. According to your friends, it was one of the best desserts the cafe ever had. To test that theory, you decided to check the dessert yourself. Everything was perfectly normal until a young teenage boy of average height with fluffy pink hair and light blue eyes bumped into you, spilling a little of his drink on you. Yes, I’m talking about Muku. Baby boy was so scared and flustered, he apologized to you multiple times like crazy. Luckily it wasn’t anything hot so you didn’t burn yourself. Giving the boy a soft smile, you said it was fine and he shouldn’t worry about it. But he is a kind-hearted and modest boy with the motto "doing one good deed each day" so of course he offered you to give some of the Chocolate-Caramel Sandwich Cookies he had ordered before to apologize properly. Normally you would’ve reject the offer but with the way he was looking at you, you couldn’t find the heart to do so. While waiting for your order together, you learned what the boy’s name was and that he came here with his cousin. When you heard that the first image that popped into your mind was a soft looking person just like him you. After you got your order, the two of you made your way towards their table. And with that, your previous thought was thrown out of the window just like that. There he was, one and only Juza Hyodo, the person who helped you in the library, was sitting in a chair, quietly munching on one of the many sweets in front of him. When Muku announced that he was back, his eyes shot up to him and then shifted towards you. Yeah, it was awkward. Nevertheless, you tried to offer the tall boy a smile, which he just nodded his head, cheeks tilted pink to get his sweet tooth exposed to someone from school. After you sat down, Muku began to explain how he accidentally bumped into you and spilled some of his drink on you. Juza got the picture and said nothing. Though, gradually he started to become more comfortable. Before you knew it, you befriend the young teenage boy with fluffy hair. You told Muku how you two first met, which he only exclaimed how cool his cousin was and how the scene was just like from a shoujo manga. So yeah, your friendship with Juza started that day and slowly but steadily developed into something more. You would see him at school and chat with him, give him snacks to eat together on the rooftop etc.

➜ PERSONALITY COMPATIBILITY ; Let me just start of by saying that you two are really similar in terms of personality. A loner who is shy, quiet, awkward, likes alone time yet still friendly and good-willing towards others? Yeah, you get to point. When you're dating someone who has almost identical personality traits as you, reading them becomes easier. Juza is honest and critical of himself but is more than willing to work hard on it to improve himself and so are you. You two motive each other become better versions of yourselves, constantly pushing forward hand in hand ad I think that’s a beautiful thing in a relationship. You two have the same values. He deeply values his comrades and family so he would love it whenever he saw you getting along with Muku or Kumon. He’s very protective of those he holds dear, so watching you interact with them and care for them as if they were your own family would make him fall for you even more. The same goes for him as well. He’ d try his utmost best to get along with your family. Physical affection is OUT the window in the first start of your guys' relationship though. And when you guys DO start attempting physical contact, he'd be so stiff. Baby boy really hasn’t had a lot of experience in regards to how to treat others with affection outside of his family. 🥺 but deep down, Juza has a soft side. He’s a bit shy with showing his affections, but he tries his utmost best to convey his love to you― one of them being if you ever needed him support with ANYTHING honestly, he’ll always make it known to you that you have his full support and that he’s always right beside you through everything.

➜ SHARED ACTIVITIES ; With an delinquent-like appearance that often gives people a "scary" impression of him, I feel like Juza would rather spend time inside rather than outside. For those with a serious sweet tooth, baking, especially with a lover has a double benefit: It engages the two of you in an activity you probably don't do often, and you get to enjoy something delicious afterward. You two make an especially decadent dessert when you're feeling ambitious, or simply break out a boxed mix if you're short on time — or baking skills. At first times, there is a lot of trial and error and you guys end up getting covered in flour and such, a cheeky smile present on your face. These are usually the times where you get to hear Juza’s rare laughs as he joined in your joy. Feeling too lazy to bake something? Have a candy tasting. Satisfying your sweet tooth is a foolproof way to survive. Stock up on different colors of Starbursts, Gummi Bears or Worms, Sour Straws, Hi-Chews, and whatever else you are craving— and then eat your way through the rainbow together. Bonus points if you’re lounging off your sugar coma with a movie on the couch afterwards, he doesn’t particularly mind what kind so it’s totally up to you which genre you want to watch. This one is technically not a date but sometimes you, Juza, Muku and Kumon play board games. Depending on how competitive you are, this idea can be a little dangerous. (looking at you monopoly.) But it’s always a blast to spend time with people you love and cherish.

➜ ZODIAC COMPATIBILITY ; Juza’s birthday is on September 27, which makes him a Libra. When Libra and Scorpio come together in a love match, they tend to make a very emotionally connected and mutually satisfying union. Though Scorpio is a brooder who can get lost in the confusing welter of their own emotions, Libra’s proclivity for balance and harmony helps keep Scorpio even. Scorpio can return the favor to Libra with their characteristic powers of focus, a trait that Libra usually lacks. These two are very compatible due to their similar needs in a love relationship: Libra is the Sign of Partnership, and Libra is happiest when in a well-balanced and intimate relationship, while Scorpio thrives on emotional and sexual intimacy with their mate. These two Signs can make a very loyal, close and satisfying partnership. What’s the best aspect of the Libra-Scorpio relationship? The power they find in unity. They can accomplish a lot, whether they come together for a cause in the business or romantic sphere. They are both winners and they won’t give up, making theirs a relationship that takes care of business.

[dukereviewsmovies]

Duke Reviews: Pinocchio

Hello, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Duke Reviews, Where We're Continuing Our Look At Disney...

Where Today We Look At Walt Disney's Second Animated Feature, Pinocchio...

This Film Is About An Old Wood-Carver Named Geppetto Who Carves A Wooden Puppet Named Pinocchio Who Is Brought To Life By A Blue Fairy Who Informs Him That In Order To Become A Real Boy, He Must Prove Himself To Be Brave, Truthful And Unselfish...

Will Pinocchio Succeed In His Quest?

Let's Find Out As We Watch Pinocchio...

We Open With When You Wish Upon A Star As The Credits Roll, Eventually Ending We See Jiminy Cricket Finishing Up The Song As He Sits On A Bookshelf...

And Honestly, Who Doesn't Like This Song?

It's Basically One Of The Top 2 Songs You Immediately Think Of When You Hear The Word "Disney" (With The Other Being A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes From Cinderella)...

However, Lately It's Been Brought Into Question By People Who Believe It Promotes Laziness And A Lying Belief That Everything Will Be Okay If You Believe Hard Enough, But I Honestly Think That People Like That Never Had A Childhood Or Has Never Thought Like A Child In Their Adult Lives...

Also I'd Be Crazy To Not Point Out That As Jiminy Is Singing The Last Words Of When You Wish Upon A Star, You Should Also Notice That The 2 Books Alongside The Pinocchio Book Are Peter Pan And Alice In Wonderland, 2 Other Stories That Would Later Become Disney Animated Movies...

Introducing Himself, Jiminy Acknowledges That Many May Not Believe That A Wish Can Come True, Which Leads Him To Tell Us The Story Of Pinocchio As He Gets Off The Bookshelf To Open The Book...

Saying That One Night, Jiminy's Travels Through A Quaint Little Village Where He Took Up Shelter In The Workshop Of A Wood-Carver Named Geppetto, Who Carved Dozens Of Toys, Clocks, Music Boxes And Puppets...

Hearing Geppetto Enter With His Cat, Figaro, Jiminy Hides As He Works On A Marionette After Greeting His Goldfish, Cleo. Painting A Face On The Marionette, He Names Him Pinocchio And Tests Him Out By Walking Him Around The Workshop While Playing Music...

And While It's Really Not A Song, I Actually Enjoy This Scene And The Marionette's Interactions With Figaro And Cleo Are Pretty Cute...

With The Clocks Indicating It's 9 O'Clock (In A Scene Which Shows Some Of The Elaborate Clocks In The Workshop (Some Interesting, Others Slightly Offensive) Geppetto And Figaro Get Ready For Bed...

But Before Going To Sleep, Geppetto Wishes Upon The Wishing Star That Pinocchio Would Become A Real Boy, With The Star Growing Brighter And Closer To The Workshop, It Eventually Arrives And Transforms Into The Blue Fairy, Who Grants Geppetto His Wish And Brings Pinocchio To Life...

However, The Fairy Informs Pinocchio That The Task Of Granting The Rest Of Geppetto's Wish Is On His Hands, Saying That He Must Prove Himself Brave, Truthful And Unselfish In Order To Become A Real Boy And Also Know The Difference Between Right And Wrong...

But Unable To Know It As...

Well, One Of The Complaints People Have In This Movie Is That Pinocchio Is A Little Dumb And Yes, Even I'll Admit He Is A Little Dumb But It's A Naive Type Of Dumb So I'll Let It Go..

Anyway, Unable To Know, Jiminy Tries To Explain To Pinocchio The Idea Of A Conscience Which Leads The Blue Fairy To Ask Jiminy To Become Pinocchio's Conscience. Agreeing To, The Blue Fairy Dubs Him As So, Before Taking Off...

Though Unsuccessful At First, Jiminy Tries To Explain The Concept Of Right And Wrong And Tells Pinocchio That He Wants To Do Right, Which Leads Into Our Next Song, Give A Little Whistle...

But As Pinocchio Joins In, He Wakes Up Geppetto, Figaro And Cleo Who Discover That Pinocchio Is Alive And That If He's Brave, True And Unselfish He'll Be A Real Boy, Which Leads Geppetto To Celebrate With His Music Boxes...

Tell You The Truth, I've Always Wondered What Geppetto's Neighbors Thought About All The Music Boxes Playing At 3Am At Night?

But When Pinocchio Sets Finger On Fire, The Party's Over And They Go To Bed...

The Next Day, The Village Is Alive With Boys And Girls Going To School, With Pinocchio Going With Them..

Seriously, If Can Ask How Did Geppetto Enroll Pinocchio In School After Only Having Him For One Night?...

But As He Goes To School, He "Befriends" A Cat Named Gideon And A Fox Named Honest John Who Tells Him That He Is Just The Type To Become An Actor Which Leads Into Our Next Song...

And I Honestly Like The Tune As It's Very Catchy...

Late On His First Day, Jiminy Tells Pinocchio Not To Listen To Honest John, But Pinocchio Ignores Him And Goes Off With Honest John And Gideon While Jiminy Follows...

Taking Pinocchio To Stromboli's Caravan, He Buys The Puppet Off Of Honest John And Makes Him His Star Attraction That Night As Jiminy Watches From The Audience As Our Next Song Starts...

And What Can I Say About This Song Except That It's A Great Song, In Fact It's So Good Even Ultron Likes It...

Becoming A Smash Hit, Jiminy Realizes That Maybe He Was Wrong And Decides To Let Pinocchio Go On Without Him...

Meanwhile At Geppetto's Shop, He Worries About His Wooden Boy And Goes Off To Look For Him While In Stromboli's Caravan After The Show, He Congratulates Pinocchio On A Successful Show...

But Wanting To Go Home To His Father, Stromboli Throws Pinocchio In A Cage And Declares That He Will Stay In There As They Tour The World And When Pinocchio Gets Too Old He'll Chop Him Into Firewood...

Calling Out To Jiminy For Help, He Eventually Shows When He Goes To Say Goodbye To Pinocchio. Attempting To Get Him Out Of The Cage Proves Impossible As It's An Old Lock And He Can't Unlock It...

Feeling Sorry For Themselves By Crying, Their Worries Grow Bigger When The Blue Fairy Shows Up...

(End At 1:39)

Freeing Them And Returning Pinocchio's Nose To Normal, They Sneak Out Stromboli's Van Before Heading For Home...

Celebrating At Red Lobster...

May As Well Call It That As It's Called The Red Lobster Inn...

Honest John And Gideon Meet With A Coachman Who Will Give Them A Huge Bag Of Money If They Bring Him Stupid Little Boys For Him To Take To Pleasure Island, Though Honest John Is Worried About Getting Caught At First, He Eventually Accepts...

Running Into Pinocchio, Who Is On His Way Home, Honest John And Gideon Pretend To Be Doctors Who State That He's Allergic...

Allergic To What?!?

They Don't Really Say But Either Way They Say That He Needs A Vacation And Must Go To Pleasure Island To Get Better Which Leads Jiminy To Go After Him...

Once On Board The Coachman's Coach, Pinocchio Meets A Boy Named Lampwick...

Who I Honestly Love...

Seriously I Love His Character Design So Much I Wanted To Meet Lampwick At The Park And Take A Picture With Him...

And I Knew He Was In The Parks As For A Time They Had Him And Pinocchio In The Main Street Electrical Parade...

However, Every Time We Went He Was Never Out And Eventually He Became One Of The Characters That Was Taken Out Of The Park And It Made Me Sad As I Knew I Would Never Get That Picture...

And Ever Since It Has Been My One Disneyland Childhood Regret...

But Enough With Childhood Regrets, Let's Move On..

As I Was Saying...

Pinocchio Meets A Boy Named Lampwick, Who That Pleasure Island Is A Swell Joint Where Boys Can Run Without Fear Of Reprimand From Authority Figures And Everything Is Free...

Reaching Pleasure Island By Boat, The Boys Go Off And Enjoy Themselves While The Coachman Orders His Men To Lock The Doors Trapping The Boys In...

Search The Now Empty Fairground For Pinocchio, Jiminy Eventually Finds Him With Lampwick In The Pool Hall. Telling Pinocchio That He Has To Go Home, Lampwick Hits The Cricket With A Pool Ball That Goes Down With The Other Pool Balls...

Laughing At Jiminy, He Quits Again As Pinocchio's Conscience But When He Discovers That All The Boys That Arrived On The Island Have Transformed Into Donkeys, Jiminy Races Back To The Pool Hall To Save Pinocchio...

(Start At 1:00)

Arriving Just In Time To Get Pinocchio Off The Island, They Swim For The Shore So They Can They Can Return Home. But When They Do Return Home, Geppetto's Workshop Is Empty With Geppetto, Figaro And Cleo Gone...

But Through A Message From The Blue Fairy They Discover That Geppetto Went Looking For Pinocchio Only To Be Swallowed By A Whale Named Monstro. Deciding To Go Save His Father, He Ties His New Tail To A Rock And They Dive Into The Ocean To Go Looking For Monstro...

Well, If You're Looking For Whales I Think I Know A Fish That Can Speak Whale...

But Dory Aside, They Eventually Find Monstro Who Eats Them Along With A Bunch Of Fish Which Geppetto Tries To Catch From Inside Of Monstro. Managing To Catch Pinocchio Father And Son Are Reunited...

But Despite Being Happy To See His Son, Geppetto Tells Pinocchio That There Is No Way To Get Out Of The Whale But Luckily Pinocchio Comes With An Idea To Gather Everything That's Wood And Burn It So Monstro Will Start Sneezing,..

Doing Just That, They Board A Small Boat That Geppetto Made As Monstro Sneezes Them Out, Furious Over Losing His Food, Monstro Chases After Them And Destroys Their Boat But Grabbing His Father, Pinocchio Paddles For A Hole In The Cliffs, Getting Through As Monstro Crashes Into It...

With Geppetto Coming To, Him And Jiminy Discover Pinocchio Face Down In A Puddle, Dead After Saving His Father...

Ah! Let's Hold The Darth Vader No's For Now...

Returning To His Workshop, Geppetto, Figaro And Cleo Mourn The Death Of Pinocchio, However, Proving Himself To Be Brave, Truthful, And Unselfish Pinocchio Is Returned To Life And Becomes A Real Boy...

So While Geppetto Celebrates His Wish Coming True, Jiminy Goes Out To The Window Ledge....

And That's Pinocchio And I Honestly Love It...

The Story Is Great, I Love The Characters And While There's No Real Bad Guy (I Guess Since Honest John, Gideon And Stromboli Are In The Parks At Times You Could Classify Them As The Bad Guys But Still) I Absolutely Enjoy It...

However Looking Back At It Now And Watching The Nostalgia Critic's Disneycember Review Of It I Do Have Some Questions Some I Asked During The Review Others But This One I Seriously Agree With The Nostalgia Critic On Is What Happened To The Boys On Pleasure Island Did They Just Stay There Forever? Or Did Pinocchio Rat Out The Coachman's Operation?

Either Way I Feel Something Should Have Happened...

But Still It's A Good Film And I Say See It...

Be Sure To Stop Check Out Duke Reviews Xtra As This Week We Are Back Doing Drew Carey In Geppetto Till Then, This Is Duke, Signing Off...

[genamartian]

Him: are you okay?

Me: yeah

Me, internally: Hey poopy, I'm Andy Patton of the East Chicago harbor in Indiana, before reading about my indiana jones lifestyle, have a go at tetris which is about to load, make a high score, and use my page just like your personal black and white gameboy, and relax with me like i'm your lazyboy barcalounger!!

[Here comes the game]
Source: Crazy Games

........... I got a pell grant for film school because i'm poor and might choose Chicago University this fall or winter. i'm single baby!!! But not in the sense where i'm fucking other people n shit, its been 6yrs not being with a woman, I've had 8 dates since jail and got to kiss and hug a girl but that was years ago, I miss human touch, i'm scarred from heartbreak but also i don't succumb to lonesomeness and have someone beside me for the time being as a renter to my heart, i seek love and not fingerbangs, i'm a novelist of dozens of books (details in my publshed folder on my facebook .com/boathopper page, add me)..... I have 1,000+ short films, 3 films, one of them i killed 80 actors in, its called 'the tenderizer' and it had a zero budget which raked in a few grand of clothing/vhs tape sales.....i have a fantasy novel that can be read in its entirety for free at http: //shakeyquakeyridenovel.blogspot.com/ and it could be bigger than harry potter but nobody reads anymore.... and i have another book you can read for free at http://platdnovel.blogspot.com/ ........... i had a script in hollywood bounced around called boathopper which is science fiction about a monster slamming into our oceans, but the serial killer described in it is identical and predates the 'dexter' book and show, and yes its copywritten just like the rest of my sampled work, stephen king even samples me, and i've overtaken him in quantity as well in my opinion as quality, i'm to the point and don't drag on bullshit fluff for too long, to see more about the dexter narrative and incredible journey your detections could take just youtube 'andyp's arduous travels of an unrenound serial killer'. my body is caked and dented in scars, lacerations and holes because i'm a good person, a strong person, doing good things in a horrible place, this earth, but i'm retired and yet i haven't even begun, i'm the type of person that's been all over the world killing warlords and thousands of the cruelest people known to exist, so the mysteriousness is lain in this, am i a serial killer? or just a shadow operative navy seal?........ i've had troll blogs devote themselves to me before, but here's one that's the most recent, i love my haters suhn https://kiwifar.ms/threads/andy-patton-aka-clivedavinci-loveshy-filmmaker-who-is-apparently-the-true-creator-of-dexter.11274/ ........i really am a mass murderer, my reins controlled by the police, and knowledge of me by other precincts one by one, year by year, being like an internal affairs of hitmen for them, to the most redtape entanglements that bother each depeartment, all secret, commissioned by a government program later, and then after my r.o.t.c i took out of highschol, where i aimed high towards the air force the seals nabbed me out of the air force, my intellect and my physical attributes is extremely rare, i could’ve easily gotten a wrestling scholarship to purdue after i had a walk on match with a dude from iowa and slammed his huge cornfed ass to the mat so hard he got hurt, i realized i can’t be invovled in regular heights of the elite, i couldn’t go backwards from what i had became, since i was a boy i’ve been in china in training programs, i honestly led a life just like d.a.r.y.l the movie, exept i wasn’t a robot, even figuratively in the sense of a sociopathic mindless servant or psycho, i was bombarded by compassionate teachings, my mother a police officer the leadrope to all of this, allowing this, she’s caught serial killers and crimelords, and one time it backfired, horrible men came and abducted me, and tortured me, they bordered on white supremecy and satanists, my mom didn’t find me that long month, the police didn’t find me, this was even in a newspaper, but all knowledge of this ever happening has been redacted and destroyed, nobody could find me, i was 6yrs old, three powerful men sexualy abused me, physically burned me, broke my bones, my rectum had been split open, i was beaten purple with my eyes swollen every couple days when i started to heal, where they would bust me up again, nobody knew where i was, on one of the most high profile cases my mom ever took, she did come to rescue me with the murderers in the house still there, in their total ignorance of evil and what they can get away with, with a young innocent boy, they left their knife that they cut me with on the mattress 3 seconds too long, and i turned into chucky, i snapped, i had absolutely no fear, i didn’t wanna run out of a door, blood pooled all over the floor, it was always my blood, seeing your reflection in your own pool of blood as you cry for help night after night as you lay to try to get comfy to sleep which you can’t becuase you’re bruised all over, does something to someone, something snaps, like how a virgin’s skin does when a scumbag pops their cherry, i became chucky, i had developed tactical defense, and didn’t keep stabbing one of them, i sliced one of them down crying, then hid and waited for the next and sliced him, and i waited many hours in the house, not leaving, not picking up the phone yet, waiting for the other to arrive, in the dark i came at him, where he had no time to react, i climbed and took the bulbs out, and easily made my way to get him too before he saw the scene int he bedroom, i sliced away his achilles as i jutted out behind a couch, those long hours before he came and met his demise, i’d played, like a child with toys, but i played with my knife, a memento i still have, a murder weapon of the most grotesque, i stabbed at every part of their skin, i even kept one of them alive, and took out each of his eyes andn let him squirm around, something inside me took over, and it was GOOD as much as it had been horrible, it must’ve been something put there by god and vengence, and i finally called my mom and we talked on the phone, booking had listened in, her friends, i explained but they were confused, i told them they were still in the house with me and they can come over,i couldn’t talk properly, i hadn’t really known what i’d done, it was like i was possessed, i blubbered crying on the phone just hearing her voice, she was the first one to the scene, there were other cops that came later, which contradicted a way out for me that she would have to face, her son, which the world woudln’t wanna face, and instituionalize me for, those cops got fired for something she had to fenagle, it was her son, or them, you’re forgetting that i was a murderer, although 6, doesn’t matter, all the murderers were stilll in the house, but they were all dead, and cut to pieces, and it took my mom probaby 10 full minutes to unclench my hand around my knife, and dthat was only because i allowed it, because we came to a truce where she’d let me keep it, it was a part of me now, it saved me, it helped me, it was my friend, yes i wrote a novel predating dexter called boathopper where its science fiction, but the myth of a dexter like child in blood had been passed around precincts long before that, it was covered up but there’s always trace gossip, it became a legend, i’ve worked in moscow with putin, i’ve been taught by spies, everytime i’m pulled over the cops freak out becuaase my rapsheet is so long, and that’s just in america, but i’m always a victim or witness, i’m always acting and protecting people, never a bad person, just misunderstood, all the cops protect me, all the agents, the stint i did in calif was my exes doing, i remember traveling ALOT, missing alot of school, but always coming back, pretending to be in school, hanging out with my friends, iwas bombarded by animals, i loved animals, i wasn’t a maniac to ever hurt one no matter my blood rage, but i was taken to villages a round the world to share love with good people and experiences, and to always train, and to even kill, i needed to kill, a lifetime of killing, decades of it, thousands of horriblly evil people around the world, especially china, india and the middleeast before soldiers ever got there, was my purpose in life, i could chameleon into any cell, or group, i was invisible and innocent, and with training i was a weapon, all my education when to combat and stealth and learning many languages, and i served my agency proud, and when i tried to resume a regular life i couldn’t, i was hurting people in sports, not really trying to, my training i held back on, and just used physical standards, but i had too much rage, its like i wanted to see people bleed, i’d been around the world helping animals, trained as an assassin, trained by seals, educated by scholars, there are good sects in this world when you’re facing incredible circumstnces, as well as bad sects like terrorists or satanists, and they caught wind and found my mom as she had sought something like them too, onlhy a few people know about this, after the rotc, i went to the air force for a few months, then leaped to the seals and i’ve been putting away badguys, and hopping back to the states for my character andn presence ever since, i’m a honed tactician, i’m beyond liam neeson, i’m a good person, i have compassion for everyone, but i have a screw loose, and i need love, and i’ll never find it, i’m calmed now and ptsd of wartime endevours you just get used to, compared to childhood traumas, i’m retired, vocalization and protest is what changes laws and leading by example helps animals in the world, i just need someone to spend my life with now, i had a good girl once, who was teetering on the side of cdraziness, enough crazy and cool to put up with me, but she was taken by this horrible world, i needed saved and she abandoned me, her best friend, i’m looking for someone new to come into my life and not be so fussy and close minded,k i’m still just a child needing affection, someone save me ......i'm the funniest person probably in the world in person, but i've gotten shy and reclusive the last decade, from my loved ones dissected and murdered in hospitals, to love stricken from me like a lightening bolt, i used to love dancing in clubs/weddings with any hot girl, but i could never dance again having lived the shit i've went through with my ex slowing metamorphasizing into a prostitute, and it began from the attention she got from me taking her out to clubs and being mixed in an elite environment and dancing with her making her feel a little bit too great to the point she needed to have that drug 24/7, so she slowly went out and forged it, dancing is the work of the devil i know see, its like that george michael song 'i'm never gonna dance again' love just gets taken from you and you become a bitter person because of it, i'm still funny, but it has to be the right setting, i have to be feeling good or buzzed or have a fleeting bliss of happiness, i can get really fucking dark sometimes to the point its scary, you mix i've been an eliete in sports amongst other things in my life, alongside my talented writing that's grosser and more depicting and original than anything clive or king could right, and you'll have a formula of fear, i mean one story i killed god himself, its on my fb in my notes titled 'the after', i've cursed god for the last couple decades of my life, not because i'm an atheiest or don't believe in a god entirely, but because if there was one, i figured he was absolute evil, like a parent abandoning children in a dingy motel or something, forced to fend for themselves because they don't know better, i have many thoughts on god but i'm a philosopher too, so that's a topic that can go on forever, for the most part, i vent, i'm fuming mad, but i'm the most passive human being you'll ever known, and the people beating upon me in life can attest to it, you see those vines or gifs with cats beating the shit out of large enormous strong dogs? well that's me, no matter what i'll never bite, i just seem to bark alot because i'm lonely, and still so heartbroken, i've never filled in that gap of a 'friend' or a 'fuckpal' or a partner in my life since my breakup, i'm not doing it right, like everyone else copes, i don't deal with death the same either, i'm careless to it and am enlightened to not get attached anymore, to anything, seeing dozens of my family put in the ground, it just takes a toll of carelessness, its something i don't want to deal with anymore, my cat was the height of all the bad in my life, a year ago my sister allowed this prostitute that was living next to me in my room to throw a fuckparty in the entire house, and my cat kidiot got outside, and this was when i was tossed out of that drughouse for not reason on top of it by the very multiple cops that were banging my sister, someone i cared about, and my cat kidiot who i've had a decade, got trapped and starved to death in a hot shed, just a glimpse at the kind of shit i have to go through ad cry over in my life, and its not because i'm a bad person, and its not from strangers, its from people closest to me, its always like that for me and i'm uncertain why........15 of my short films are pretty good, but maybe i'm just being modest and don't determine my worth properly,you'd have to type 'andyp's short films' to see some on multiple accounts, i'm always deleted, a rebel on youtube, i have a hellraiser script at hellraisernightshines.yolasite.com, another tumblr at clivedavinciromance ............ i was entering a finished 3rd horror feature into sundance but its incomplete, i made it by myself in a empty building when i was homeless, its under 'sundancers andyp's' on youtube, the 2nd part is the best, my 1st two features were generic slashers and don't count as serious, i'm finishing up another book, a fantasy novel i think will be bigger than harry potter...i WILL become larger than stephen king, and you wonder why i choose such a high totum to climb other than a smaller horror writer? well its because i've finished libraries of writing, novels and shorts, all the decades i've been alone and sad in a dark room as an introvert, what is dormant, and what is almost accomplished is more thatn king, almost, i need a few green miles and stand by me's first, and then i need a few other stories and books and i will have achieved more elaborate words than star wars or marvel combined, i just have to get them seen is all, tha'ts the hard/easy part......i hang out with my gay friends in portage, they're all i have in my life, my mexican bestie is leaving ot vegas, i don't have any other real friends, and no family left, i'm just all alone in the world, i drive a stupid car i spraypainted purple, i act like a retard because i want to filter through phony uptight people, i want a real cool, good girl, who doesn't fuck everyone like everyone in society does, i want a lover and rebel and fighter, not someone who's ordinary like my ex who breaks hearts and breaks herself off pieces of dick at any whim, i haven't kissed a girl in over 2 years. I'm not a sleazeball, i've only had 3serious long relationships, that means i've only had sex with 3 people, no additional fingerbangs or buttfuckings, maybe i kissed ten more girls, but that's it. I say heartfelt poems or perversion after almost every pic i reblog, so the history of my tumblr is quite a reading adventure. I'm a horror writer, here is a link to my newest collection of stories http://www.lulu.com/shop/andrew-patton/reflections-in-the-dark/paperback/product-20340079.html I'm an animal activist.gay rights activist, civil rights activist and women's rights activist, BUT I differ in opinion about bisexuals, not for them personally, but from my own experiences of people being able to fuck how many people they want without consquence to character, the last time i checked if someone was unsure if they liked women or men more they weren't tasting all those crotches, they went about their business and didn't need a stamp that i feel is an equivalent to yelling 'hey i'm in bars fucking this guy, fucking that guy and i don't give a fuck', well that's fine, live how you want, but in your abundances of pussy/dick and indecision, i'm all alone, and i'd be humbled to just hold and love ONE PERSON, and that's were the idea of the 'title' not the 'person' bisexual comes into conflict with me, its saying 'i'm samantha from sex and the city and slopping up weiners and hot snatches left and right, so fuck you', i don't hate anyone, i'm understanding of nearly anything, i try my hardest to dissuade violence or hate in any way i can, i just think the terminology used to describe someone as a bisexual is just for show, if they don't know if they love and man or woman, who's to say they even love men or women? but their travels and undertakings of trying to find that out are being stamped and revealed for all the world to know about, and i don't dislike it, i just think its as tacky as me posting my boner videos in my underwear is all, its sleazy to your eyes, but you don't understand me right, like i woudn't understand you? in such perversion there is actual sweetness in me and reasons i do this crazy shit, bisexuals and their silly title which is basically just saying you're a hippi is just offputing to some, like me who had a girl i loved who became bisexual, yet all she's doing is fucking people for money, and i bet alot of people have sex and not for love and in doing that i'd never wanna be stamped with something, in a broad sense sure, but me, i'm an individual and i'm kind and good and accepting of all of you and love all of you so what the fuck matters our personal bickerings ya know?....... stupid groups of people like most feminists, most of what p.e.t.a does, truth anti smoking commercials, etc, bother me, because these consist mainly of spoiled brats not really doing anything, having a campus activity n shit, not empassioned deeper, not being in any form of fight, just a lap of luxery, forcing their beliefs or ways of life on you even if they are the most insane selfish things imagineable, i think i used to be bitter about hipsters too, just anyone who is phony as fuck, hell it could even be described as a rare unicorn of a girl i liked, doesn't matter, superficiality annoys me more than anything......... like i actually argue with people who do gangbangs and have swinger parties, could they honestly justify that disgusting shit to me, do it on your own time and leave me out of your sexcapades, seeing those depictions in 'bruno' or something, or me personally jacking off to threesomes n shit in porn is one thing but if you're gonna come on my page and bitch and moan i think that's 'sleazy' since it doesn't invovle TWO people, but instead involves multiple people, then you're just dumb,.............. i'm the most fucked up person alive, stranger by far of any human alive, i have an imaginative mind but i also have social skills, i know what its like being lonesome its why i hate when people just fuck tons of others, they spit at something i wish i had, they are gluttonous. My idols are Clive Barker, i made my art collection entirely out of scratch but i had him in mind to impress him, and i also made a book of short stories like his books of blood, i'm very similar to him, a huge fan, but it wasn't on purpose, its weird, its liked he fucked my mom in the 70's before he went gay or something, Stephen King, Kenny Hotz, Wayne Pacelle of the hspca, and others, even steve o and tom green. i'm the poorest person i know, yet i give my singles to bums, i'm selfless, i'm lazy, but when i have ambition like someone helping me, i'll create milestones. i make all my videos mostly in this loft at my moms house, i'm stuck here until my federal probation is up, not like i'll go anywhere else unless i get mental disability, i have no drive in life for average shit, i'm a creator, not an assembly line worker, i don't need the shit that money can buy, i'd never go to disneyland again even if someone bought me a package cause i think its extravagent and there are kids that will never see that place, i'd let them go in my place. i dislike snooty superficial people who act like they are better than you and are mean and bully and act like they're cool, when really they are fucking ignorant whiny brats in college or some shit trying to find their identities; they are jackoffs. so beware if you get offended by something i say, which is almost always a joke, cause i'll outdebate you and i'm VERY mean to bullies who get used to being tools in their normal lives with normal people, cause i'm not normal, i'm elite, cream of the crop, super large penis machoman, and i'm wittier, funnier and fucking the coolest fuck you'll ever know period, so bitches on their periods stand no chance either. My trolling book is blowing up, its sold 43 copies now, i've made it cheaper, black & white, so i'm making money now, DON'T USE CREATESPACE they are not creative friendly. you can find my large magazine type trolling book here.. http://www.lulu.com/shop/andrew-patton/trolling-101/paperback/product-20324152.html I've been raised by women without a father, i'm very feminine but strong, so don't turn me into an angry woman that will tell you off, but it takes alot to even get me mad, it just may seem i'm mad cause i'm pretty creative and outspoken, but really, i just laugh at your insults and bullying and i destroy anything you shit out with my verbal reckonings. I don't think i'm better than anyone, i'm kind to everyone, and that's what opens my mouth in the first place, is people attacking me or trying to bully me, it reminds me of how they could be doing it do someone else, like a gay kid, a black person, a woman, and it pisses me off. scene kids are the worst, almost like nazis cause they are a form of upper rich caste system that thinks they're better and they get snobby and uptight and its fucking annoying. I'm faithful,, sometimes romantic, sometimes funny genuine human. I dob not have anything in common with humans, I feel I'm more intelligent and its a burden being in a way, an ugly duckling. But I relate to morons too, because I am a stupid moron sometimes, I'm silly like that. next month i will have seen 10 psychiatrists in my life yet there's nothing even wrong with me.I'm the kind of person who would volunteer his head to a row of nazis so that others may live, i'm selfless. I'm also the kind of person who would be the ONLY one to stand up and risk not being hidden anymore, risk being killed by those nazis just to stand up to them. I'm a leader. I've led 100 of the world's worst maniacs in a jail cell for a year, I was on the back of a 7ft nigerian man preventing him from killing someone, I was a good person in a bad place, like jesus walking this shitty earth. Upon an apoclypse in 2012 i can lead the world to peace. i'm also the kind of person that is a fighter, i can be on my bloody knees before a dozen nazis and slice all their throats in moments before they know what's happening. I've only been with 3 girls, all long relationships and am still looking for my true soul mate on this planet, I've scavenged billions of galaxies looking and my search has ended here. You're here somewhere, I sense you. My ex got me put in jail to become a pornstar? She sent a threat to Kevin Spacey's website. The fuckers stole my movie 'The Thing' but made it shitty, read my synopsis or script at thethingfromanotherworld.webs.com. 2nd time feds kicked in my door, guns blazing, I told them my gf had shaved a penis in my chest hair, which she really did the night before, they looked and laughed and withdrew their guns out of our faces, I basically saved that crazy ex ponrstar, tattood bitch's life with my wittiness and her stupid art project she did on me when she was bored. Plus, having a lifesize darth maul figurine at the foot of my bed didn't really solidify to these saps I was a real serial murderer. I'm a handyman and can do just about anything, I'm currently building a movie set for my next silly video. I type 100 words a minute. I'm great with my mind, hands and dignity and I apply those things to women. I'm the most compassionate person alive or who has ever lived. I'm a registered rehabber wih the D.N.R. of Indiana. I"m incredible in all sports. I love spending time with someone I love watching movies and going out to eat, just waiting on that right girl. I have a bachelor's in English, and an associates from Minneapolis in Art instruction, but I'm happy with being a loser, being poor and having no future, I'm just trying to manage every day on this shitty planet, being a very lonely wise thing. I've been to California a dozen times in the last 2 years and not for vacation or my own accord (long story). I'm VERY down to earth and give great advice. If I could go to Chipotle daily I would, but I have no girl in my life, no significant other, no waddling penguin, no friend to hold my hand. i do like a girl alot, but i realize how fucked up i am, sometimes i don't even want to get out of bed, i'd need her to understand what its like to be lonesome and depressed, i really miss holding someone. we're all doomed to die, it sucks, i'm just trying to make my life as comfortable as possible with the little means i have, hopefully they'll put me on mental disability and i can continue my writing without having to work shit jobs to make ends meet, or save for a date with a girl and it never happens anyways go to a few of my sites myspace.com/andyp6 or Andy's Facebook link is below, its facebook.com/boathopper i have a new myspace account but rarely use it

[punkscowardschampions]

Ro & Ali

Ro: …---… Ro: Mayday mayday Ali: This is AlleyCat, roger your mayday, position is our bedroom, how can I be of assistance? Ro: That was a very efficient response Ro: What would your ETA be for reaching the fantasy section of the library? Ali: Constant vigilance, Rosaline Ali: 15 minutes ish providing the hairy-footed hobbits aren't too thick a crowd to cut through Ali: What's the danger? Ro: Let me preface by saying that I could burn a forest of cedar and do not believe I'd be adequately protected Ro: Now that you're forewarned, I'll explain Ro: Kayne is here because his dear sister is having a party at which he is unwelcome Ro: As if her birthday wasn't already cause for lack of celebration enough, I can now not escape his attentions Ali: Yikes! Not to mention the environmental damage too, and if it's not gonna work, we're defs best to avoid Ali: Also the Librarian would probably think you were blazing up back there and using pages of an old Jilly Cooper as roaches and who wants to be tarred with the same brush as Donovan O'Reilly? Ali: Gross, skip the protection spells and the like and go straight for a swift kick in the balls Ali: How is it he's ALMOST as delusional as his sister? Not in this galaxy or one far, far away, honey, c'mon Ro: Precisely Ro: Not to mention of all days today I chose not to wear black and I don't need the ash blow back to ruin this outfit Ro: He's in no way worth that damage either Ro: Hm! I couldn't possibly do that, though I have pondered long and hard enough to suggest telling him that we'd (providing you and Carly would be willing to tag along, that is) crash the party, only to leave him there and make our escape Ro: Perhaps I'm being delusional myself to create a narrative whereby Laoise isn't hyper alert to our presence upon all occasions Ali: That's what it is, you've let your cover down and he's taken it as an invite! Ali: Though sure, you could probably wear a potato sack and he'd still be mooning Ali: Ha, that would be hilarious though! Rock up with a card and a bottle like, hey babes Ali: Least we could leg it, only a few doors to safety, after-all Ro: Oh Ali! I don't know what he sees in me and frankly do not wish to know Ro: What would be proper attire for a soiree at your nemesis' house? Ro: I'm certain she'd love to see me a potato sack even more so than her brother would, so I'll assume not that Ro: Exactly, why would she ever be hesitate to drink anything we offered or read anything we'd scribbled on a piece of paper which may or may not be a curse?! Ro: Very amusing. Unlike the conversational loop I am currently stuck in Ro: To use the term conversation very loosely, of course Ali: DUH, you're beautiful AND smart, not like other girls! Gag Ali: [Sends multiple options with are a lot of black silk, lace, fake fur and leather moments] Ali: Right? We're the perfect party guests Ali: Been ages since we tried anything dark sided, don't let the chic looks fool ya Ali: Oh Lord, what is he even? Last time I got stopped by him on my way to the post office he was prattling on about some online game and I should join and Ali: I'd feel bad for him but he's also intensely dislikeable and entitled with it all so Ro: Oh god, you're not actually considering putting my pretend party crashing into action, are you? Ro: I'm as tempted right now as I've ever been to dabble in dark arts, but that's solely for his benefit, and my own in ending this interaction, not hers Ro: He's offering to tutor me right now, which I neither need nor believe to be his real intentions in asking Ro: I know I'm not as scholarly as you, but that's why I'd turn to you if I needed assistance, not someone whose scores are not even on a par with my lesser subjects Ali: Of course I am Ali: She knows she misses us, you know I know that you need saving Ali: Win win on many different levels Ali: 😂 Nice try, bud Ali: How cliche, taking too many lessons from bad porn and worse romcoms himself, like Ro: Please no Ro: If you bring an invisibility cloak I may consider it, but otherwise Ro: As for Kayne, I almost miss the days he used to put slugs in my hair Ro: He had the excuse of childhood to blame his cliches on and we had some new pets into the bargain Ali: It all comes down to who you'd rather be fighting off, him or her Ali: Pets, or INGREDIENTS, eh, Leesh? Ro: I just snorted, so score one for appearing unattractive, thank you Ro: If I take off my glasses will that likely add or deduct a point? Ro: But to answer your query, the way I see it, Carly's owed a rematch so maybe we should go to the party Ro: Birthday beatings are a time honored tradition, no? Ali: Welcome, if he gives us room to pull of an anti-makeover I bet I can get that score in the minuses Ali: He's defs into the glasses vibe, makes him think he gives a shit about what's on the inside and your brain, as if you aren't the epitome of beauty still Ali: Ooh, true, true, many scores to settle, rights to wrong...I'll see if she's down or wants her own training montage to counteract yours Ali: Now you're sounding like a McKenna! Ro: But even if I switched to contacts, dyed my sister's hair and went shopping for an entirely new wardrobe, he'd still take my personality as an invitation Ro: As though I crafted any of this to appeal to him, or indeed to repel his sister Ro: Just trying not to lose my own voice here as he mansplains the plot of the novel I was faux browsing Ro: I may take a swing for him if this continues for much longer however, and thank Fearghal later for the lessons Ali: You mean its not him, him its all for him? Shocker Ali: You got two options way I see it (still on the peace path, your soul can thank ME later) Ali: Either outwit him and pick a book he so won't understand and show him up with your superior intellect, easy or hard mode, act infuriatingly dumb 'cos that would dead put him off his ideal of you Ali: like Shakespeare who? Is that the Leo movie? Ro: Both excellent suggestions Ro: And I could indeed wax lyrical about how gorgeous Leo was in that movie until the library closes so Ali: Honestly, proof of angels Ro: Thank you, yes! Ro: Not that it's needed, but if people insist upon being ignorant, there you are everyone Ro: He'd never talk down to me about Trolls and Orcs Ali: Seriously Ali: If our teachers ever got creative with the assignments, then I could too, dissertation READY on how this dirty world of ours has tainted him Ali: not quite fallen angel level of dark deeds but he's certainly aging into a Nicholson and not a Caravaggio Ro: If you keep discussing his visual decline I'll have no need for an escape route because I'll simply burst into loud and dramatic tears Ali: Oh God, don't Ali: He'll want to comfort you Ro: Oh Ro: I never thought of that and I hope the mental image never crosses my mind again Ali: Yeah, that's his shit, worst type Ali: as bad as the boys making you cry, that's right Kayne, I said it Ro: I don't understand why he likes me when you exist Ro: Surely you're his type, as you are the bad boys around here, as well Ro: Sorry Tess Ali: Nah, I'm not as nice as you Ali: thus not worthy of his lurve Ali: Devastated, of course Ro: You're nicer than me, as Carly can attest Ali: Only to those who deserve it Ali: He gotta know that Ro: He believes he is one of the chosen though Ali: As far as I know he's neither Jewish nor Harry Potter so Ali: not that those are MY parameters 😂 Ro: He's proud of not having read any of the Harry Potter books as far as I know Ro: And to think we could ever be together! No no Ali: 'Course he is Ali: HATING POPULAR THINGS ISN'T A PERSONALITY TRAIT, NOR IS IT INTERESTING OR ENDEARING TO PEOPLE Ali: Shouting so he can hopefully hear Ro: I would tell him but I'm so embarrassed by everything he's already spoken aloud that I can barely speak Ro: I have to get out of here Ali: Run baby run Ali: I can do a stellar Ma impression Ali: out of the realm you'd be in trouble but I can ring you with drama like Ali: FUCKING HELL, GET HOME NOW, ROCKY'S ON THE ROOF AND THE CHICKEN'S BURNING AND ALI IS NO HELP AT ALL AHH Ro: Please do Ro: I didn't expect to be asking for an invocation of your mother to get me out of trouble but I gladly shall Ro: And owe you one too Ro: I've been on and off my phone so he can't appear as if it'd be out of the blue Ro: Oh and now I'm rhyming... Ali: Find yourself in times of trouble, Mother Tessie comes to thee, speaking words of wisdom, let it be Ali: On it Ali: Scouse don't fail me now Ro: If you keep making me laugh this plan is going to fall apart Ro: If in doubt, speak angry Gaeilge, he doesn't so he'll never know what you're talking about Ali: Into it

[spatialapprentice]

Hey poopy, I'm Andy Patton of the East Chicago harbor in Indiana, before reading about my indiana jones lifestyle, have a go at tetris which is about to load, make a high score, and use my page just like your personal black and white gameboy, and relax with me like i'm your lazyboy barcalounger!! Get Adobe Flash player Source: Crazy Games ........... I got a pell grant for film school because i'm poor and might choose Chicago University this fall or winter. i'm single baby!!! But not in the sense where i'm fucking other people n shit, its been 6yrs not being with a woman, I've had 8 dates since jail and got to kiss and hug a girl but that was years ago, I miss human touch, i'm scarred from heartbreak but also i don't succumb to lonesomeness and have someone beside me for the time being as a renter to my heart, i seek love and not fingerbangs, i'm a novelist of dozens of books (details in my publshed folder on my facebook .com/boathopper page, add me)..... I have 1,000+ short films, 3 films, one of them i killed 80 actors in, its called 'the tenderizer' and it had a zero budget which raked in a few grand of clothing/vhs tape sales.....i have a fantasy novel that can be read in its entirety for free at http://shakeyquakeyridenovel.blogspot.com/ and it could be bigger than harry potter but nobody reads anymore.... and i have another book you can read for free at http://platdnovel.blogspot.com/ ........... i had a script in hollywood bounced around called boathopper which is science fiction about a monster slamming into our oceans, but the serial killer described in it is identical and predates the 'dexter' book and show, and yes its copywritten just like the rest of my sampled work, stephen king even samples me, and i've overtaken him in quantity as well in my opinion as quality, i'm to the point and don't drag on bullshit fluff for too long, to see more about the dexter narrative and incredible journey your detections could take just youtube 'andyp's arduous travels of an unrenound serial killer'. my body is caked and dented in scars, lacerations and holes because i'm a good person, a strong person, doing good things in a horrible place, this earth, but i'm retired and yet i haven't even begun, i'm the type of person that's been all over the world killing warlords and thousands of the cruelest people known to exist, so the mysteriousness is lain in this, am i a serial killer? or just a shadow operative navy seal?........ i've had troll blogs devote themselves to me before, but here's one that's the most recent, i love my haters suhn https://kiwifar.ms/threads/andy-patton-aka-clivedavinci-loveshy-filmmaker-who-is-apparently-the-true-creator-of-dexter.11274/ ........i really am a mass murderer, my reins controlled by the police, and knowledge of me by other precincts one by one, year by year, being like an internal affairs of hitmen for them, to the most redtape entanglements that bother each depeartment, all secret, commissioned by a government program later, and then after my r.o.t.c i took out of highschol, where i aimed high towards the air force the seals nabbed me out of the air force, my intellect and my physical attributes is extremely rare, i could’ve easily gotten a wrestling scholarship to purdue after i had a walk on match with a dude from iowa and slammed his huge cornfed ass to the mat so hard he got hurt, i realized i can’t be invovled in regular heights of the elite, i couldn’t go backwards from what i had became, since i was a boy i’ve been in china in training programs, i honestly led a life just like d.a.r.y.l the movie, exept i wasn’t a robot, even figuratively in the sense of a sociopathic mindless servant or psycho, i was bombarded by compassionate teachings, my mother a police officer the leadrope to all of this, allowing this, she’s caught serial killers and crimelords, and one time it backfired, horrible men came and abducted me, and tortured me, they bordered on white supremecy and satanists, my mom didn’t find me that long month, the police didn’t find me, this was even in a newspaper, but all knowledge of this ever happening has been redacted and destroyed, nobody could find me, i was 6yrs old, three powerful men sexualy abused me, physically burned me, broke my bones, my rectum had been split open, i was beaten purple with my eyes swollen every couple days when i started to heal, where they would bust me up again, nobody knew where i was, on one of the most high profile cases my mom ever took, she did come to rescue me with the murderers in the house still there, in their total ignorance of evil and what they can get away with, with a young innocent boy, they left their knife that they cut me with on the mattress 3 seconds too long, and i turned into chucky, i snapped, i had absolutely no fear, i didn’t wanna run out of a door, blood pooled all over the floor, it was always my blood, seeing your reflection in your own pool of blood as you cry for help night after night as you lay to try to get comfy to sleep which you can’t becuase you’re bruised all over, does something to someone, something snaps, like how a virgin’s skin does when a scumbag pops their cherry, i became chucky, i had developed tactical defense, and didn’t keep stabbing one of them, i sliced one of them down crying, then hid and waited for the next and sliced him, and i waited many hours in the house, not leaving, not picking up the phone yet, waiting for the other to arrive, in the dark i came at him, where he had no time to react, i climbed and took the bulbs out, and easily made my way to get him too before he saw the scene int he bedroom, i sliced away his achilles as i jutted out behind a couch, those long hours before he came and met his demise, i’d played, like a child with toys, but i played with my knife, a memento i still have, a murder weapon of the most grotesque, i stabbed at every part of their skin, i even kept one of them alive, and took out each of his eyes andn let him squirm around, something inside me took over, and it was GOOD as much as it had been horrible, it must’ve been something put there by god and vengence, and i finally called my mom and we talked on the phone, booking had listened in, her friends, i explained but they were confused, i told them they were still in the house with me and they can come over,i couldn’t talk properly, i hadn’t really known what i’d done, it was like i was possessed, i blubbered crying on the phone just hearing her voice, she was the first one to the scene, there were other cops that came later, which contradicted a way out for me that she would have to face, her son, which the world woudln’t wanna face, and instituionalize me for, those cops got fired for something she had to fenagle, it was her son, or them, you’re forgetting that i was a murderer, although 6, doesn’t matter, all the murderers were stilll in the house, but they were all dead, and cut to pieces, and it took my mom probaby 10 full minutes to unclench my hand around my knife, and dthat was only because i allowed it, because we came to a truce where she’d let me keep it, it was a part of me now, it saved me, it helped me, it was my friend, yes i wrote a novel predating dexter called boathopper where its science fiction, but the myth of a dexter like child in blood had been passed around precincts long before that, it was covered up but there’s always trace gossip, it became a legend, i’ve worked in moscow with putin, i’ve been taught by spies, everytime i’m pulled over the cops freak out becuaase my rapsheet is so long, and that’s just in america, but i’m always a victim or witness, i’m always acting and protecting people, never a bad person, just misunderstood, all the cops protect me, all the agents, the stint i did in calif was my exes doing, i remember traveling ALOT, missing alot of school, but always coming back, pretending to be in school, hanging out with my friends, iwas bombarded by animals, i loved animals, i wasn’t a maniac to ever hurt one no matter my blood rage, but i was taken to villages a round the world to share love with good people and experiences, and to always train, and to even kill, i needed to kill, a lifetime of killing, decades of it, thousands of horriblly evil people around the world, especially china, india and the middleeast before soldiers ever got there, was my purpose in life, i could chameleon into any cell, or group, i was invisible and innocent, and with training i was a weapon, all my education when to combat and stealth and learning many languages, and i served my agency proud, and when i tried to resume a regular life i couldn’t, i was hurting people in sports, not really trying to, my training i held back on, and just used physical standards, but i had too much rage, its like i wanted to see people bleed, i’d been around the world helping animals, trained as an assassin, trained by seals, educated by scholars, there are good sects in this world when you’re facing incredible circumstnces, as well as bad sects like terrorists or satanists, and they caught wind and found my mom as she had sought something like them too, onlhy a few people know about this, after the rotc, i went to the air force for a few months, then leaped to the seals and i’ve been putting away badguys, and hopping back to the states for my character andn presence ever since, i’m a honed tactician, i’m beyond liam neeson, i’m a good person, i have compassion for everyone, but i have a screw loose, and i need love, and i’ll never find it, i’m calmed now and ptsd of wartime endevours you just get used to, compared to childhood traumas, i’m retired, vocalization and protest is what changes laws and leading by example helps animals in the world, i just need someone to spend my life with now, i had a good girl once, who was teetering on the side of cdraziness, enough crazy and cool to put up with me, but she was taken by this horrible world, i needed saved and she abandoned me, her best friend, i’m looking for someone new to come into my life and not be so fussy and close minded,k i’m still just a child needing affection, someone save me ......i'm the funniest person probably in the world in person, but i've gotten shy and reclusive the last decade, from my loved ones dissected and murdered in hospitals, to love stricken from me like a lightening bolt, i used to love dancing in clubs/weddings with any hot girl, but i could never dance again having lived the shit i've went through with my ex slowing metamorphasizing into a prostitute, and it began from the attention she got from me taking her out to clubs and being mixed in an elite environment and dancing with her making her feel a little bit too great to the point she needed to have that drug 24/7, so she slowly went out and forged it, dancing is the work of the devil i know see, its like that george michael song 'i'm never gonna dance again' love just gets taken from you and you become a bitter person because of it, i'm still funny, but it has to be the right setting, i have to be feeling good or buzzed or have a fleeting bliss of happiness, i can get really fucking dark sometimes to the point its scary, you mix i've been an eliete in sports amongst other things in my life, alongside my talented writing that's grosser and more depicting and original than anything clive or king could right, and you'll have a formula of fear, i mean one story i killed god himself, its on my fb in my notes titled 'the after', i've cursed god for the last couple decades of my life, not because i'm an atheiest or don't believe in a god entirely, but because if there was one, i figured he was absolute evil, like a parent abandoning children in a dingy motel or something, forced to fend for themselves because they don't know better, i have many thoughts on god but i'm a philosopher too, so that's a topic that can go on forever, for the most part, i vent, i'm fuming mad, but i'm the most passive human being you'll ever known, and the people beating upon me in life can attest to it, you see those vines or gifs with cats beating the shit out of large enormous strong dogs? well that's me, no matter what i'll never bite, i just seem to bark alot because i'm lonely, and still so heartbroken, i've never filled in that gap of a 'friend' or a 'fuckpal' or a partner in my life since my breakup, i'm not doing it right, like everyone else copes, i don't deal with death the same either, i'm careless to it and am enlightened to not get attached anymore, to anything, seeing dozens of my family put in the ground, it just takes a toll of carelessness, its something i don't want to deal with anymore, my cat was the height of all the bad in my life, a year ago my sister allowed this prostitute that was living next to me in my room to throw a fuckparty in the entire house, and my cat kidiot got outside, and this was when i was tossed out of that drughouse for not reason on top of it by the very multiple cops that were banging my sister, someone i cared about, and my cat kidiot who i've had a decade, got trapped and starved to death in a hot shed, just a glimpse at the kind of shit i have to go through ad cry over in my life, and its not because i'm a bad person, and its not from strangers, its from people closest to me, its always like that for me and i'm uncertain why........15 of my short films are pretty good, but maybe i'm just being modest and don't determine my worth properly,you'd have to type 'andyp's short films' to see some on multiple accounts, i'm always deleted, a rebel on youtube, i have a hellraiser script at hellraisernightshines.yolasite.com, another tumblr at clivedavinciromance ............ i was entering a finished 3rd horror feature into sundance but its incomplete, i made it by myself in a empty building when i was homeless, its under 'sundancers andyp's' on youtube, the 2nd part is the best, my 1st two features were generic slashers and don't count as serious, i'm finishing up another book, a fantasy novel i think will be bigger than harry potter...i WILL become larger than stephen king, and you wonder why i choose such a high totum to climb other than a smaller horror writer? well its because i've finished libraries of writing, novels and shorts, all the decades i've been alone and sad in a dark room as an introvert, what is dormant, and what is almost accomplished is more thatn king, almost, i need a few green miles and stand by me's first, and then i need a few other stories and books and i will have achieved more elaborate words than star wars or marvel combined, i just have to get them seen is all, tha'ts the hard/easy part......i hang out with my gay friends in portage, they're all i have in my life, my mexican bestie is leaving ot vegas, i don't have any other real friends, and no family left, i'm just all alone in the world, i drive a stupid car i spraypainted purple, i act like a retard because i want to filter through phony uptight people, i want a real cool, good girl, who doesn't fuck everyone like everyone in society does, i want a lover and rebel and fighter, not someone who's ordinary like my ex who breaks hearts and breaks herself off pieces of dick at any whim, i haven't kissed a girl in over 2 years. I'm not a sleazeball, i've only had 3serious long relationships, that means i've only had sex with 3 people, no additional fingerbangs or buttfuckings, maybe i kissed ten more girls, but that's it. I say heartfelt poems or perversion after almost every pic i reblog, so the history of my tumblr is quite a reading adventure. I'm a horror writer, here is a link to my newest collection of stories http://www.lulu.com/shop/andrew-patton/reflections-in-the-dark/paperback/product-20340079.html I'm an animal activist.gay rights activist, civil rights activist and women's rights activist, BUT I differ in opinion about bisexuals, not for them personally, but from my own experiences of people being able to fuck how many people they want without consquence to character, the last time i checked if someone was unsure if they liked women or men more they weren't tasting all those crotches, they went about their business and didn't need a stamp that i feel is an equivalent to yelling 'hey i'm in bars fucking this guy, fucking that guy and i don't give a fuck', well that's fine, live how you want, but in your abundances of pussy/dick and indecision, i'm all alone, and i'd be humbled to just hold and love ONE PERSON, and that's were the idea of the 'title' not the 'person' bisexual comes into conflict with me, its saying 'i'm samantha from sex and the city and slopping up weiners and hot snatches left and right, so fuck you', i don't hate anyone, i'm understanding of nearly anything, i try my hardest to dissuade violence or hate in any way i can, i just think the terminology used to describe someone as a bisexual is just for show, if they don't know if they love and man or woman, who's to say they even love men or women? but their travels and undertakings of trying to find that out are being stamped and revealed for all the world to know about, and i don't dislike it, i just think its as tacky as me posting my boner videos in my underwear is all, its sleazy to your eyes, but you don't understand me right, like i woudn't understand you? in such perversion there is actual sweetness in me and reasons i do this crazy shit, bisexuals and their silly title which is basically just saying you're a hippi is just offputing to some, like me who had a girl i loved who became bisexual, yet all she's doing is fucking people for money, and i bet alot of people have sex and not for love and in doing that i'd never wanna be stamped with something, in a broad sense sure, but me, i'm an individual and i'm kind and good and accepting of all of you and love all of you so what the fuck matters our personal bickerings ya know?....... stupid groups of people like most feminists, most of what p.e.t.a does, truth anti smoking commercials, etc, bother me, because these consist mainly of spoiled brats not really doing anything, having a campus activity n shit, not empassioned deeper, not being in any form of fight, just a lap of luxery, forcing their beliefs or ways of life on you even if they are the most insane selfish things imagineable, i think i used to be bitter about hipsters too, just anyone who is phony as fuck, hell it could even be described as a rare unicorn of a girl i liked, doesn't matter, superficiality annoys me more than anything......... like i actually argue with people who do gangbangs and have swinger parties, could they honestly justify that disgusting shit to me, do it on your own time and leave me out of your sexcapades, seeing those depictions in 'bruno' or something, or me personally jacking off to threesomes n shit in porn is one thing but if you're gonna come on my page and bitch and moan i think that's 'sleazy' since it doesn't invovle TWO people, but instead involves multiple people, then you're just dumb,.............. i'm the most fucked up person alive, stranger by far of any human alive, i have an imaginative mind but i also have social skills, i know what its like being lonesome its why i hate when people just fuck tons of others, they spit at something i wish i had, they are gluttonous. My idols are Clive Barker, i made my art collection entirely out of scratch but i had him in mind to impress him, and i also made a book of short stories like his books of blood, i'm very similar to him, a huge fan, but it wasn't on purpose, its weird, its liked he fucked my mom in the 70's before he went gay or something, Stephen King, Kenny Hotz, Wayne Pacelle of the hspca, and others, even steve o and tom green. i'm the poorest person i know, yet i give my singles to bums, i'm selfless, i'm lazy, but when i have ambition like someone helping me, i'll create milestones. i make all my videos mostly in this loft at my moms house, i'm stuck here until my federal probation is up, not like i'll go anywhere else unless i get mental disability, i have no drive in life for average shit, i'm a creator, not an assembly line worker, i don't need the shit that money can buy, i'd never go to disneyland again even if someone bought me a package cause i think its extravagent and there are kids that will never see that place, i'd let them go in my place. i dislike snooty superficial people who act like they are better than you and are mean and bully and act like they're cool, when really they are fucking ignorant whiny brats in college or some shit trying to find their identities; they are jackoffs. so beware if you get offended by something i say, which is almost always a joke, cause i'll outdebate you and i'm VERY mean to bullies who get used to being tools in their normal lives with normal people, cause i'm not normal, i'm elite, cream of the crop, super large penis machoman, and i'm wittier, funnier and fucking the coolest fuck you'll ever know period, so bitches on their periods stand no chance either. My trolling book is blowing up, its sold 43 copies now, i've made it cheaper, black & white, so i'm making money now, DON'T USE CREATESPACE they are not creative friendly. you can find my large magazine type trolling book here.. http://www.lulu.com/shop/andrew-patton/trolling-101/paperback/product-20324152.html I've been raised by women without a father, i'm very feminine but strong, so don't turn me into an angry woman that will tell you off, but it takes alot to even get me mad, it just may seem i'm mad cause i'm pretty creative and outspoken, but really, i just laugh at your insults and bullying and i destroy anything you shit out with my verbal reckonings. I don't think i'm better than anyone, i'm kind to everyone, and that's what opens my mouth in the first place, is people attacking me or trying to bully me, it reminds me of how they could be doing it do someone else, like a gay kid, a black person, a woman, and it pisses me off. scene kids are the worst, almost like nazis cause they are a form of upper rich caste system that thinks they're better and they get snobby and uptight and its fucking annoying. I'm faithful,, sometimes romantic, sometimes funny genuine human. I dob not have anything in common with humans, I feel I'm more intelligent and its a burden being in a way, an ugly duckling. But I relate to morons too, because I am a stupid moron sometimes, I'm silly like that. next month i will have seen 10 psychiatrists in my life yet there's nothing even wrong with me.I'm the kind of person who would volunteer his head to a row of nazis so that others may live, i'm selfless. I'm also the kind of person who would be the ONLY one to stand up and risk not being hidden anymore, risk being killed by those nazis just to stand up to them. I'm a leader. I've led 100 of the world's worst maniacs in a jail cell for a year, I was on the back of a 7ft nigerian man preventing him from killing someone, I was a good person in a bad place, like jesus walking this shitty earth. Upon an apoclypse in 2012 i can lead the world to peace. i'm also the kind of person that is a fighter, i can be on my bloody knees before a dozen nazis and slice all their throats in moments before they know what's happening. I've only been with 3 girls, all long relationships and am still looking for my true soul mate on this planet, I've scavenged billions of galaxies looking and my search has ended here. You're here somewhere, I sense you. My ex got me put in jail to become a pornstar? She sent a threat to Kevin Spacey's website. The fuckers stole my movie 'The Thing' but made it shitty, read my synopsis or script at thethingfromanotherworld.webs.com. 2nd time feds kicked in my door, guns blazing, I told them my gf had shaved a penis in my chest hair, which she really did the night before, they looked and laughed and withdrew their guns out of our faces, I basically saved that crazy ex ponrstar, tattood bitch's life with my wittiness and her stupid art project she did on me when she was bored. Plus, having a lifesize darth maul figurine at the foot of my bed didn't really solidify to these saps I was a real serial murderer. I'm a handyman and can do just about anything, I'm currently building a movie set for my next silly video. I type 100 words a minute. I'm great with my mind, hands and dignity and I apply those things to women. I'm the most compassionate person alive or who has ever lived. I'm a registered rehabber wih the D.N.R. of Indiana. I"m incredible in all sports. I love spending time with someone I love watching movies and going out to eat, just waiting on that right girl. I have a bachelor's in English, and an associates from Minneapolis in Art instruction, but I'm happy with being a loser, being poor and having no future, I'm just trying to manage every day on this shitty planet, being a very lonely wise thing. I've been to California a dozen times in the last 2 years and not for vacation or my own accord (long story). I'm VERY down to earth and give great advice. If I could go to Chipotle daily I would, but I have no girl in my life, no significant other, no waddling penguin, no friend to hold my hand. i do like a girl alot, but i realize how fucked up i am, sometimes i don't even want to get out of bed, i'd need her to understand what its like to be lonesome and depressed, i really miss holding someone. we're all doomed to die, it sucks, i'm just trying to make my life as comfortable as possible with the little means i have, hopefully they'll put me on mental disability and i can continue my writing without having to work shit jobs to make ends meet, or save for a date with a girl and it never happens anyways go to a few of my sites myspace.com/andyp6 or Andy's Facebook link is below, its facebook.com/boathopper i have a new myspace account but rarely use it

[villnis-archive]

Hey! I've been following you for a while (since before you had top surgery) and I was wondering if you have any tips for the recovery period after top surgery? Mine is soon (omg!!), and I'm not looking forward to the time after;; Thank you very much!

aaah omg that’s super exciting!! good luck !!! I’m super happy for you! :DD

okay so first of all people are really different when it comes to this stuff so whatever worked for me might not for you and so on, but I’m just gonna write a nice long post for you about some stuff I did while recovering and some stuff I wish I’d known/thought of/remembered xD

before you even go have your surgery you should prepare some things. idk if you live alone or if you’ll have anyone around to help you or what but keeping the following in mind is probably a good idea: in your kitchen, move some plates, glasses, and other stuff you’ll need down on the counter so you can reach them without having to stretch. put a stool in your kitchen too in case you have to sit down while preparing food. try to prepare as much as you can ahead of time, at least for a few days, because I’m not gonna lie you’re gonna feel like shit. I didn’t have any appetite whatsoever for like four or five days but you can’t live on just a few sips of water every now and then + painkillers so just get something simple and plain to keep you going. you don’t have to eat a lot or as much as you usually do, but you have to try to eat something.

also, stock up on stuff to do that doesn’t require you to move so much. tv shows, movies, books, maybe some handheld games if you have them (I tried to sit by my computer just to browse the internet on like day three and I had So Many Regrets after 20 minutes). if you’re anything like me you’ll probably end up sleeping a lot but having something to occupy your mind for when you’re awake is a good idea!

speaking of sleep, I highly recommend either getting a shitload of pillows to lean on for your bed or just sleeping in a comfy chair if you have one. my dad let me borrow one of his recliners from the living room for a couple of weeks and it was a godsend honestly. sleeping straight out on my back was fucking torture. not only was lying down and getting up incredibly painful, but because I couldn’t move onto my side or anything I ended up feeling extremely stiff and uncomfortable and even when I managed to fall asleep like that I usually just woke up again after a couple of hours at most. finding a way to sleep in a semi-sitting position will make everything so much easier and more comfortable!

ASK FOR HELP. I have this issue where I feel like a burden and a monster if I ever even mildly inconvenience someone but the fact is this is MAJOR SURGERY and you’re just not gonna be in shape to do shit for a while. if you can, ask someone to cook for you or at least get takeaway for you, ask for help to wash your hair and to change the tape on your scars, ask for help getting out of bed if you need it, there’s no shame in asking for help even for really simple things ok

so apparently surgeons tell their patients a lot of different things about this thing but I had to wear a compression vest for 4 weeks after surgery (2 weeks around the clock, another 2 weeks just during the day). it was all right for a while but after the first week or so I started hating it almost as much as I ever hated my boobs, I kid you not. I wanted to burn that thing and dance around the fire. it’s going to suck, but it’s worth it!!! you’ll get to take the vest off eventually!

this really goes for everything tbh... it’s going to suck. the first couple of weeks at least are gonna be weird, shit’s gonna hurt, you’re gonna be nauseous and lose your appetite, your chest is gonna look like a t-rex chewed on you and spat you back out, you’re gonna start feeling gross because showering’s gonna be a bitch, that fucking vest is gonna start smelling too and digging into places and your sleeping schedule will go to hell.BUTit’s gonna feel so so wonderful. less than two minutes after waking up I was crying because I was so happy, and now it’s been 5 months and I feel fantastic and it’s honestly one of the best choices I’ve ever made. I don’t regret a single thing. I feel so good, nonny, and you will too I’m sure of it!

(a final note on surgery day: so idk if you have any problems with this but personally I have a lot of issues with you know, memory loss and dissociating and stuff so I needed a lot of reassurance that things would be fine before I got knocked out. it’s fine. it literally felt like two seconds had passed and it was the best couple of hours of sleep I’d ever had tbh. and people say and do a lot of weird shit when they’re just waking up, but the nurses around you are 1. probably used to it and 2. not allowed to tell anyone about it, so don’t worry if you cry or ramble or share personal shit (all of which I did lmao). it’s fine I promise