#i'm thinking since there's three of them i'll have vinnie cover the true crime
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The Bridge of the Demonic Goatman (Part 2)
Because this story is way too long to post all in one place, Iāve been forced to post it in parts. Part 1 has already been posted. Here is Part 2, where Gene, Vinnie, and Paul, go into the woods.Ā
Also, I realize how shitty the editing here is. Because Tumblr is being a fucking bitch (so yāknow, the usual for Tumblr), this is how itās gonna have to be. You should be able to figure out whoās speaking, though. Enjoy!
GENE [voiceover]: Perhaps more foreboding than the bridge is the woods that lies beyond it. It is rumored that for nearly a hundred years, people have disappeared near the bridge or in the surrounding woods. Along with the Goatman, people have reported seeing the ghostly figure of a woman and hearing the sounds of a womanās voice or laughter. There have also been sightings of flashing lights.
--
[Paul, Gene, and Vinnie are now walking through the woods. Like on the bridge, the only parts of the forest we see are the parts lit up by their camera flashlights. Everything else is pitch-black]
PAUL: Okay, I will admitā¦ this is pretty creepy.
GENE: I feel like Iām in every damn horror movie Iāve ever seen, and I hate it.
VINNIE: This reminds me of the time I went camping with my Boy Scout troupe.
PAUL: You donāt seem the type to have been in a Boy Scout troupe.
VINNIE: I wasnāt. My dad made me sign up. He let me quit after fifth grade, though.
PAUL: Oh, okay.
GENE: Guys, seriouslyā¦ Iām gettinā pretty nervous now. [shouts into the woods] Is there anyone out there?
PAUL: [shouts] Hello!
[there is no response apart from crickets. They continue walking]
GENE: People usually report being overcome with emotion in here.
VINNIE: Likeā¦
GENE: Like, a violent emotion.
PAUL: Do you feel that way?
GENE: Uh, no. I donāt.
PAUL: Okay, good.
GENE: Not yet, at least.
PAUL: Just give me and Vinnie a heads-up when you start to feelā¦ murder-y.
GENE: Yeah, Iāll do that.
PAUL: Great.
VINNIE: Thanks, Gene.Ā
--
GENE [voiceover]: These woods are rumored to be the sight of Satanic rituals, attempting to conjure demonic entities. One paranormal investigator claimed to have found animal remains, suggesting evidence of sacrificial rituals. In fact, one local police officer told us that local pet stores stopped selling cats due to the amount of sacrificed cats being found in these woods.
Oh my God, they killed the cats? Did any survive?
Uh, no, not that I know of.
Those poor catsā¦
By the way, I forgot to mention, these woods are also dangerous because of the people that may be in there.
I mean, people can be greater threats than demons or ghouls, soā¦ thatās fair.
I just realized we donāt have a way to defend ourselves if we get attacked by a person.
We probably wonāt get attacked, Gene.
I have a keychain knife if that happens.
Oh, well good. If we get attacked, weāll just let Vinnie save us.
I donāt think a keychain knife willā
The nutcases that live in the woods will cower in fear before Vinnie Vincent and his mighty keychain knife.
*wheeze* Ha haā¦
*sigh* Never mind.
Youāre my hero, Vinnie.
Thank you.
--
[cut back to Gene, Paul, and Vinnie walking through the forest]
GENE: Is there anybody out here?
PAUL: Anyā¦ Any cultists? Any Satanists? Anyone up to some crazy cult stuff out here?
VINNIE: Anyone cutting off the head of a defenseless, innocent cat?
PAUL: Still mad about that, huh?
VINNIE: Yes.
[they continue walking, swinging their flashlights around]
GENE: Yāknow, guys, I feel like we might genuinely come to close to dying some episode.
PAUL: You think so?
GENE: Yeahā¦ Who in their right mind would go actively searching for ghosts and demons, and make more than one attempt to contact them?
VINNIE: Ah, but remember, Genie: if weāre doing that, then clearly weāre not in our right mind.
GENE: ā¦ I guess thatās fair. [he stops and points his flashlight off to the side of the path]
PAUL: You hear something?
GENE: Yeah, I thought Iāoh fuck! [camera cuts to looking into the bushes, lit up by Geneās flashlight] I saw something move. I donāt whatās over there, but I saw the bushes move.
[they move closer to the bushes]
PAUL: [shouts] Hello?
VINNIE: Anybody there?
GENE: Hello? [pause in which nothing happens] Christā¦
PAUL: I did see the bush moveā¦
GENE: [swings his flashlight as he looks around] Did you hear that?
VINNIE: Hear what?
GENE: I heard a scream.
PAUL: You sure?
GENE: Iām serious, I heard a scream.
--
FOOTAGE REPLAY: when Gene, Paul, and Vinnie are looking into the bushes.
PAUL: I did see the bush moveā¦
[in the background, amongst the sounds of crickets, there is the sound of a female scream]
[the footage replays over again and the scream is heard again]
--
GENE: Hello?
PAUL: Anyone out there?
[silence]
PAUL: What if we pretend weāre in on it?
VINNIE: Like weāre cultists as well?
PAUL: Yeah.
GENE: I want to tell you to not do thatā¦ but I also know youāre gonna do it anyway.
PAUL: Yep. [shouts aloud] Weāre here for the cult stuff!
VINNIE: We saw the ad on Craigslist!
GENE: Do you seriously think a cult would advertise itself on Craigslist?
VINNIE: Itās Craigslist, Gene. Itās the only place that would let a cult advertise itself.
[there is still silence]
PAUL: Oh well.
GENE: Letās keep walking. I donāt want to stay in the same place for too long.
[they continue walking. Along the way they pass a sign with unreadable graffiti letters spray-painted on it]
PAUL: You nervous, Gene?
GENE: Very nervous.
PAUL: Donāt worry. Remember, Vinnieās got his keychain knife. Heās ready to stab a bitch.
VINNIE: [nods] Yep.
--
FOOTAGE REPLAY: as Gene, Vinnie, and Paul walk past the sign.
Paul: Heās ready to stab a bitch.
[in the background, there is another distant scream, this time sounding male]
[the footage replays again and the scream is heard again]
--
[Gene, Paul, and Vinnie come to a spot where branches stick out, forming something that looks a little like a structure]
PAUL: Hey, check this out. Looks kind of like a houseā¦ Perhaps a house where witches gathered? To make spells and curses? To summon dark spirits?
GENE: [hisses] Shut up, Paul.
[they move to stand in the middle of the structure and look around]
VINNIE: This doesnāt look like a human-made house.
PAUL: Who knows, Vinnie, maybe it wasnāt made by a human at allā¦
GENE: Iām gonna kill you, Paul. [suddenly turns and points his flashlight into the woods] Did you hear that?
--
FOOTAGE REPLAY: Paul, Gene, and Vinnie standing in the middle of the structure.
GENE: Iām gonna kill you, Paul.
[a quiet voice is heard, a male voice yelling āFuck!ā]
GENE: Did you hear that?
[footage replays over again]
--
VINNIE: Hear what?
GENE: A voice, I thought I heard a voice.
PAUL: Whoās out there? Are you a cult member? [Paul moves out of the structure further into the trees. Vinnie follows with Gene behind Vinnie]
PAUL: Cāmon out! Ā
GENE: Paulā
PAUL: Take off your cloak!
VINNIE: Release the cat youāre about to murder.
[they move closer together as they walk. There is complete silence. Gene suddenly stops and startles]
GENE: Ah!
[Paul and Vinnie look. Itās a bush]
VINNIE: [smiling slightly] Just a plant, Gene.
PAUL: [definitely smiling wider than Vinnie] You got scared by a plant?
GENE: Shut up, this forest is messing with my head.
[all three of them suddenly turn around]
--
FOOTAGE REPLAY: right before they turn around.
GENE: Shut up, this forest is messing with my head.
[there is a barely audible sound of a snapping branch. They all turn around]
[footage replays over again]
--
GENE: Did you hear that?
VINNIE: I definitely heard that.
PAUL: Yep, me too.
[they move over to where they heard the sound]
GENE: Oh Godā¦
PAUL: Whoās out there?
VINNIE: Iāve got a knife!
[silence]
PAUL: If there are any cultists out here, I must warn you, we have protection.
GENE: Goddammit, Paul, shut up!
PAUL: [ignoring him] Weāve got a keychain knife, and a water gun!
VINNIE: Itās holy water!
[silence]
PAUL: Well, I was right. Thereās no one out here. Though that branch snapping was suggestive.
GENE: Yeah. Letās leave.
--
GENE [voiceover]: Multiple investigators have picked up on the name āSteveā through EVP and spirit box sessions, perhaps the name that the Goatman or another entity is going by.
Iām sorryā¦ Steve?
Yep. Steve.
ā¦ So youāre saying that if the Goatman truly exists, and itās really the Goatmanās voice investigators pick upā¦ heās using the name Steve?
Thatās pretty much it, yeah.
*snickering* Thatās so fucking stupidā¦
What fucking demon wakes up in the morning and thinks, āYou know what would be a really frightening name? Steve!ā Are you making this up?
I am not making this up.
God, what a fucking copoutā¦
GENE [voiceover]: Overall, this Goatman entity and/or the other possible entities that haunt the bridge and these woods are said to be extremely dangerous and physical with those who encounter them. People have reported being thrown, dragged, and struck, and multiple people have claimed to be scratched three times, a reportedly common occurrence in demonic attacks that is a symbolic mocking of the Holy Trinity. People have also claimed to be overcome with feelings of aggression and violence. In one instance, an investigator had envisioned murdering her entire team of investigators.
--
[back to the woods with Gene, Paul, and Vinnie. Gene has the spirit box in his hands]
PAUL: And weāre breaking out the spirit box again, huh?
VINNIE: Thisāll be interesting, weāve never used it to talk to a demon before.
GENE: Yeah, soā¦ weāll see how this goes. Okay, Iām turning it on. Itās gonna be loud.
[Gene turns on the spirit box. Immediately there is loud white noise]
GENE: So just as a reminder, this spirit box is flipping through radio stations at an incredibly fast rate. Every two-tenths of a second, it switches to a different channel, and it produces white noise. And conceivably, spirits could use this to communicate with us.
PAUL: Or a demon in this case.
GENE: Or a demon, thank you, Paul. If we hear a voice saying more than one word, then the chances are very good that itās a spirit, or a demon, talking to us.
VINNIE: Can I ask first?
GENE: Sure.
VINNIE: Okay. [raises his voice] Is there anyone here with us?
[white noise is the only response]
PAUL: Let me try. [raises voice] Is there a Goatman here with us?
[more white noise. Then there is a sudden, very noticeable noise from the spirit box]
GENE: What the fuck was that?
VINNIE: Ask again!
PAUL: Is there a demon here with us?
[from the spirit box, we hear a voice saying āStopā]
PAUL: Is there a Goatman here? We kicked you off your bridge, Goatman; got anything to say about that?
[white noise. Then a voice says what sounds like āGoatmanā]
GENE: That sounded like āGoatman.ā
PAUL: Say your name.
--
FOOTAGE REPLAY: Gene is holding the spirit box. We see Vinnie listening over his shoulder.
[white noise, then the voice saying āGoatmanā]
[the footage, and the voice, play over again: āGoatmanā]
--
GENE: Is Steve here?
VINNIE: How did you come up with the name āSteveā? You didnāt think any other name was better than that?
[more white noise. Then a voice: āBridgeā]
GENE: I heard ābridge.ā
[more white noise. Then another voice, that sounds like the same voice as before: āSteveā]
VINNIE: I heard āSteve.ā
--
AUDIO REPLAY:
[white noise]
ābridgeā
[white noise]
āSteveā
--
GENE [voiceover]: Based on the response from the spirit box, weāll be ending our investigation by returning to the apparent epicenter of activity: Old Alton Bridge. Once there, we will perform a ritual that we have never performed before on this show, and that I have never done before in my life.
Wait, youāve never used a Ouija board before?
Nope.
Seriously?
Yeah, seriously. I donāt screw with that stuff, man.
Gene, youāre willing to use a spirit box but not a Ouija board? Cāmonā¦
Even IāVE used a Ouija board before.
Okay, listen, spirit boxes are different from Ouija boards. Ouija boardsā¦ they have the potential to unleash an angry spirit.
Cāmon, Gene, people use Ouija boards at parties. They used to sell them at Toys āR Us. Theyāre not that scary.
You would say thatā¦ Can we just get this over with?
--
[Gene, Paul, and Vinnie are sitting in the middle of the bridge around the Ouija board. Candles are lit around them. Gene is standing, holding a large box of salt, while Paul and Vinnie are sitting on the bridge]
GENE: I just want to say for the record that this still seems incredibly stupid. Weāre opening a doorway, and calling a goddamn demon to talk with us. But, luckily, I have protection. [Vinnie snorts] Shut up, Vinnie. For protection, Iām going to do this.
[Gene walks in a circle around the candles, pouring out the salt]
PAUL: A salt circle. Good idea, Gene.
[Gene finishes pouring out the salt and sets the box aside. He steps into the circle and sits down, and all three place their hands on the planchette]
GENE: So we just place our hands on the planchette and relax them. If there are spirits, then the planchette will move, because theyāre moving it. Not because one of us is moving it. Got that, Paul?
PAUL: I wasnāt gonna move it! I wasnāt even thinking of moving it!
GENE: You say, unconvincingly.
PAUL: Whatever, Gene.
VINNIE: I will say, every time Iāve seen a video of someone using a Ouija board, theyāre always going, āWhoa!ā very dramatically. Like, you can clearly tell theyāre playing it up for views.
PAUL: Are they very clearly moving it themselves?
VINNIE: Most of the time, yes. But none of us are going to move it, soā¦ weāll see what happens.
PAUL: So how do we start?
GENE: I guess by saying our names.
PAUL: Okay, you go first.
GENE: Fine. [out loud] This is Gene.
[they move the planchette across the board to spell out Geneās name]
PAUL, GENE, and VINNIE: G, E, N, E.
PAUL: Iām Paul. [they spell out Paulās name]
PAUL, GENE, and VINNIE: P, A, U, L.
GENE: [muttering] Still canāt believe weāre doing thisā¦
VINNIE: And Iām Vinnie. [they spell out Vinnieās name]
PAUL, GENE, and VINNIE: V, I, N, N, I, E.
GENE: Is there anyone out here, who would like to speak with us?
[silence. They all wait, looking down at the board. The planchette does not move]
PAUL: I just thought of something. If you put salt around us, doesnāt that mean Goatman canāt get to the Ouija board?
VINNIE: ā¦ Oh, God, youāre right. Geneā
GENE: But the salt would trap him in here with us. Thatās what we want.
PAUL: Well yeah, but what if he was outside the circle when you did it?
GENE: ā¦ Well, what do you want me to do about it?
PAUL: Give him an entrance.
GENE: [pauses, then sighs heavily] Fine. [he turns his body around, without taking his hands off the planchette, and blows at the salt] Vinnie, you blow by you.
[Vinnie turns and blows at the salt. Paul does the same, and takes one hand off the planchette and brushes some of the salt away]
PAUL: There. Thereās your opening, Steve.
[Vinnie laughs]
[they all turn back around to the Ouija board, and Paul puts his hand back on the planchette]
GENE: If thereās anyone out there that wants to speak with us, nowās the time. Whatās your name?
[for a couple beats of silence, there is nothing. Thenā¦]
VINNIE: Oh my God.
PAUL: Oh shit.
GENE: Oh, fuckā¦
[the planchette is moving, very, very slowly, across the board]
GENE: FuckingāPaul, are you moving it?
PAUL: I swear to God, Iām not moving it. Are you?
GENE: No, Iām not moving it! Vinnie?
VINNIE: I am not moving it.
[they watch the planchette move]
PAUL: Itās going pretty slow.
GENE: If it spells out āSteveāā¦
VINNIE: If it spells out āSteveā I might start going back to church.
[the planchette moves over the letter āSā]
PAUL: Go faster, you demon fuck!
[Gene and Vinnie jump. Then they start to laugh, Vinnie harder than Gene]
VINNIE: Jesus Christ, Paulā¦
GENE: Just dropped all decorum, huh?
PAUL: [laughing] I wanted to see if I could catch it off-guard.
GENE: Okayā¦ Well, we have an āS.ā
PAUL: How about this? If you canāt spell out your name, then this bridge is officially mine!
GENE: Dammit, Paulā¦
VINNIE: Seems fair to me.
PAUL: Yeah, itās perfectly fair.
[the planchette has slowly moved up to the letter āGā]
GENE: I thought it was going for the āE,ā but no, thatās āGā.
VINNIE: āGā for Gene?
PAUL: He does know your name. Maybe itās you he wants, Gene.
GENE: Iām ignoring you two.
[camera circles around Gene, Paul, and Vinnie, looking down at the Ouija board as intense music plays]
GENE: All right, demon, this is your last chance. Tell us your name.
PAUL: Remember the deal.
GENE: [sighs] Okay, yeah, fine. If you canāt spell out your name, itās Paulās bridge.
[silence. They wait. Nothing happens]
VINNIE: Well, I guess that settles it.
PAUL: [loudly] This bridge is mine now!
[they take their hands off the planchette]
GENE: Guess thatās it.
PAUL: Ouija boards are crap.
VINNIE: Guys, we still have to close it.
GENE: Oh right.
PAUL, GENE and VINNIE: [move the planchette across āGOODBYEā] G, O, O, D, B, Y, E. [they take their hands off the planchette]
PAUL: Goodbye!
VINNIE: Goodbye, Goatman!
GENE: All right, letās clean up and get the hell out of here.
[they move to clear away the salt and blow out the candles]
PAUL: Got anything you wanna say, Gene? You were pretty anxious about this all night.
GENE: I mean, I would say Iām feelinā pretty good right now. I conquered it.
VINNIE: Yeah, you did. Weāre proud of you, Genie.
GENE: Iāll just say goodbye, how about that?
PAUL: Yeah, gloat a bit, Gene. This is a win for you.
GENE: [raises his voice] Well, demonsā¦ this has been fun. Itās been realā¦ real weird, but hey. Soā¦ goodbye. See ya.
PAUL: [picks up a candle and holds it up] As we snuff these candles, so too do we snuff you from this mortal world. [blows out the candle] You fucking cowards.
[Vinnie laughs]
GENE: Paul, if you get dragged off this bridge and thrown into the river, I wonāt come and rescue you.
PAUL: He says unconvincingly.
--
[as Geneās voice narrates, we see a montage of footage from the entire night]
GENE [voiceover]: Nobody knows why the Goatman and surrounding entities haunt this area, and even though we never encountered anything, I personally donāt doubt its existence. Either way, we have once again opened the door for a dark entity to enter our lives. There is a small part of my mind that is disappointed we never saw him, but I would be lying if I said I also wasnāt a little relieved. Regardless, whether or not the Goatmanās Bridge is truly infested will remainā¦ UNSOLVED.
--
[as the credits roll, we cut back to the car. Gene is driving, Vinnie is in the passenger seat, and Paul is in the backseat. Through the windshield, we can see dawn slowly breaking]
VINNIE: Iām sorry, I still canāt get over the fact that the Goatman supposedly goes by the name Steve. [Paul laughs] Thatās so fucking lame.
GENE: This experience has taught me nothing, except that you two are fucking weirdos. You know that, right?
PAUL: Ah, you love us.
GENE: I wouldnāt call it ālove.ā
VINNIE: He says unconvincingly.Ā
BUZZFEED UNSOLVED SUPERNATURAL
What unsolved mystery do you want to see next?
#kiss unsolved#kiss unsolved supernatural#paul is a troll#seriously I made him such a troll XD#gene is freaking out even if he'll deny it#vinnie is mad about the cats#honestly I was too#a moment of silence for the cats#also I've been informed that the correct term for vinnie is a reeder#apparently on buzzfeed unsolved that's become their name for the neutral one#shout out to kategwidt for letting me know#so yeah that's kiss unsolved#if you guys want to see a true crime one please feel free to suggest it!#i'm thinking since there's three of them i'll have vinnie cover the true crime#y'know since he's kind of an unsolved mystery himself#kiss au writing#my writing#hope you guys enjoyed this crazy story!#I swear to jesus Christ on a fucking tricycle it shouldn't have been this hard to post this damn thing...#fuck tumblr
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