#i'm still v fine and normal abt this man

[acetier]

"Be a good mongrel and stay. Down."

[hertwood]

dts s4 e6-8

e6: -hearing claire talk abt williams after leaving, i hope she's happy seeing how they're doing now :) -straight up forgot latifi got any screentime aldfkjaskdfljaksld -if there is not a williams episode in the new season i will riot i NEED this kinda focus on my boys -SPEAKING OF logan cameo hi baby!!!!!!!! -all the talk abt strategic risks is making me wanna get back to my f1manager williams save. it rly IS like that -not george getting on the radio to say prioritize nicky cuz hes in front 😭😭😭 hes such a good boy LISTEN -its great just to see how much it meant to everyone working on that team. i'm so glad williams got a dedicated episode and istg if they dont get another one this year -i love george russell so so much btw. overwhelmed w my love for him :')

e7: -YUKI EPISODE -HI LIAM -i adore the liam/yuki dynamic so much btw it is so underrated n special obsessed w them -laurent rossi i hate u btw -the estie/nando pre divorce dynamic is so iconic u just know they were fucking raw -i /do/ not like the way the present estie as a rookie like hes in the same category as yuki. i think they couldve told their stories together without creating false parallels -i cannot WAIT to see this race its so fuckin bonkers -"yuki do you need support?????????" "no 🥰🥰🥰" -nando picking estie up and twirling them around i NEED to know what caused the divorce -i do fucking adore estie please free him from the alpine shitshow toto wolff pls help

e8: -valtteri v george is the vibes of the new mistress trying to replace the long term wife. if i had to describe it alkdfjasklfjadlkf -sorry this scene of him ordering coffee w/ carmen is just too funny to me "normal milk, any milk is fine" ok old man (like i'm not the same) -yall have to admit this was pretty cunty. bro was in a williams and still was like yeah let me make a move on current champions mercedes' car thats a good idea. would he rly be my special bby boy if he didnt go balls to the wall on occasion. love him -max and george are the SAME how doenst everyone see -anyway i hope george and valtteri are cool now. it is a pretty iconic tiff tbf -the whiplash between e6 and e8 george is STAGGERING -"at the end of the season, i want to look in the mirror and say i gave my everything" i love listening to valtteri talk he is so well spoken and such a lovely man. i've never seen anyone who hates him honestly -small brocedes moment and i'm foaming at the mouth. i'm gonna miss them so much 😭😭😭😭 -i will say the non-linearity does bother me more than it did the first watch, i think after you've seen a full f1 season front to back it shifts your perspective and makes the jumping around harder to settle with. it is wierd going back to silverstone 6 episodes later -i need to hear susie wolff's opinion on every f1 issue i'll listen to her blindly -BAN WET RACES IN SPA -that lando crash gives me goosebumps. i knew it was coming and still wasn't prepared

[zarisdonut]

The opinions that literally no one asked for

Alright so yesterday I finished Fate: The Winx Saga and here are all my thoughts.

Disclaimer: These are just my opinions, so it's okay if you don't agree w me.

First off, STELLATRIX.

Can't get them off my mind and I'm a 100% sure Beatrix is gonna come back so it's fine. I absolutely love their dynamic and honestly, I've spent all the eps just waiting for their scenes and I am not ashamed of it. Btw, Stella should've been a lesbian, but it's fine. As long as she's sapphic I don't really care.

Also, I'm pretty sure theyre gonna be canon. Like, all their relationship is so queercoded, with parallels w other ships and everything??? No way they're just gal pals. I refuse. So yeah, in other words, I am clowning hard, which is not surprising cause all I ever do in life is clown over sapphic non-canon ships apparently. (I have a long history abt that)

Musa

Musa, girl, what have they done to you? I didn't hate the haircut as much as I thought I would (even tho its not great) but the clothes???? Hello????? It was hard to watch.

Also, I was kind of surprised w the fact that I liked her "transition" from mind fairy to Specialist, so I'm pretty pleased with her storyline. I will say this: I wish she were sapphic. Not bc of anything specific, but I do remember having a moment where I shipped her w Stella, cause I made a whole fanfic in my head abt them, so yeah.

Also, riven and musa????? Look, I don't normally like m/f ships (specially if they're not in a sitcom). Like, I don't hate them, but they don't give me the buzz, yk. Most times I'm just neutral about them, but I gotta say, man, that Riven and Musa... God, I loved their scenes. I found their dynamic so interesting and the chemistry. THE CHEMISTRY. The slowburn is gonna burn so good.

Terra + Flora

V happy with the fact that Terra is a lesbian cause we need more lgbtq+ people in this show (and in life in general). I will say her storyline w the specialist girl is a bit odd cause they don't really focus much on her (which they obvs should've done that) and isn't she dating someone else when they have their first kiss???? A bit confused abt that.

Other than that, I liked her storyline, and even tho her coming out isn't the best one Ive ever seen, I was pretty pleased. Especially the moment where she tells the whole group and she wants to dismiss it w the rug or smth (I forgot lol) and Stella comes in and hugs her???? Melts my heart.

Moving on, I didn't know how I was gonna feel abt Flora?? And I still don't know lol. I will say that the actress did a good job, but I think they should've added more bonding scenes between Flora and the other girls cause it just didn't feel like they were best friends just like the rest of the group? But maybe it's just me. Still, I don't know how I feel about Flora yet. Like, Im pretty sure I like her, but I think it's more about what she represents, (which is the cartoon character) than what she actually is. I definitely need to see more of her.

Also, the relationship w Terra,, it made sense but also it was too predictable. Like, its not bad but I did find it a tad basic and I wish they made it a bit differently. Like, I know it's hard to innovate but idk, maybe add a little something that makes them stand out? But again, maybe that's just me.

Aisha

Idk what to say abt her tbh, I just like her lol. I will say that it didn't make a lot of sense the way she reacted when she first met Grey (I think that's his name but in case its not, I'm talking abt the guy lol). Like, bro, the lake is not yours, chill. So it was a bit hard for me to get into the relationship but eventually I kinda did, so yeah. V sad that the first boyfriend she has, turns out to be a blood witch. The bestie cannot catch a break lol.

I will say that, (a bit of constructive criticism here) I find Aisha as a character a bit flat. And not only her, I think that in general all the characters except maybe Beatrix and even Riven(?) seem pretty shallow to me. Or maybe like, not shallow but as if they haven't still found their own spark? Idk if this makes sense but I feel like most characters fall into these cliches and tropes, which is totally fine, cause nowadays literally everyone needs to fall into one of these, like it's literally unavoidable. But baby, you need to add a bit of their own spark to make them stand out. To make them memorable, yk? So yeah, I wish they stopped and tried to work on the characters a bit more. Like, Stella, Musa and even Terra are not as bad (even tho imo they a bit of work from the writers wouldn't hurt cause Im pretty sure the actresses make more than half of the work in this aspect) but Aisha, Flora, Sky and especially Bloom... It's bad yall. It's very bad (Will explain the Bloom thing later, don't hate me just yet)

BTW: I say all of this out of all the love in my heart, cause I believe in all the characters and I see the potential, and what they could become. And I hate the fact that I can see it and they're just wasting it so yeah. Don't hate me besties <333

Bloom + Sky

I'm sorry but Bloom is the most basic female main character from a sci-fi tv show you can ever have. Like, bro, just put a little more effort into creating her, please. Like, I'm begging. Maybe it's just me, but the bestie is missing personality (not dragging the actress, just the writers and how they did it), cause yeah, its fine if she wants to sacrifice herself all the time, or if she wants to do everything alone cause she's special n stuff but it's like her whole personality is revolving around her having the Dragon Flame. Which yeah, it is important and it is a v important part of her life but dude. Dont make her one-dimensional.

This also happens w Sky btw. And ofc when you put a bland character w another bland character everything gets... well. Not great. But I won't get into their relationship bc honestly, I do not care. Like I said before, m/f relationships don't give me the buzz so yeah.

To wrap it up...

I did like the second season. I would like to say I liked it more than the first one but I barely remember anything of it, so yeah, lol (Im a horrible fan, I know). I will say that idk what it is, that's making me continue the show, cause I normally only consume sapphic/lgbt media, but here we are. And I did want to leave it a few times cause the heavy straight content is so strong, but Im glad I continued it. And I hope they get renewed for a third season cause I really believe that it has potential and yeah, that's all for now ig. Maybe I'll do another post talking abt other stuff, like plotwise or smth. We'll see. But it'll def be shorter than this cause holy shit, this is long for a person who "isn't v into the show anyways" (that's me lying to myself btw lol)

N e ways idk whos gonna read this, but on the off chance someone has read through all my bullshit and is reading these last sentences, woah, I'm impressed. I cannot believe you've stuck around to know all the thoughts of a random stranger on the internet abt a show abt fairies lol.

N e ways, I love you and have a good day <3333

Kindly,

The random stranger on the internet.

[darkfinch]

Like colors and outfits and haircuts and vibes!!

[Original Ask] Out of curiosity: ideal hell au aesthetics for both Eliot and Moreau?

!!! thank you for clarifying, i made some melodramatic hell au aesthetic collages bc the answer is just "canon but 2 inches from the left" and im gonna say too many words abt it :)

SO. here's too many words abt aesthetics.

i’ve always been of the baseless opinion that eliot started growing his hair out after he left moreau, as a way to be a little less recognizable (also something something bodily autonomy)? so since our hell au eliot has not actually done the leaving, yet, he’s still bound to moreau’s own aesthetic preferences for his people; i think his hair’s a little shorter than it was in rundown job in this au, and it gets longer the longer he stays with the team.

(i also think hell au eliot is a little physically smaller than our canon eliot, because he's hasn't been running jobs solo and he hasn't been his own first and last line of defence for a while? no one's getting close enough to him that he needs to be able to Take Hits etc. i think he probably starts putting on more weight when he joins the team.)

clothes & colours: we know moreau likes his people in black-on-black everything, so eliot starts out v dark v monochromatic. once he starts trying to sell Nate's Eliot TM as a Real Person with Preferences, he goes out and grabs some henleys and some plaid shirts and some jeans (so cheap so so cheap), but I don't think he ever gets to Our eliot's jewel tone situation?

hell au eliot is like regular eliot except washed out and desaturated and a lil empty; he's not going for The Iconic Red Eliot Shirt. he's going for the saddest noncommittal brick red you've ever seen in your life

(i think by the time we get to season 3, eliot looks v much like Our eliot who we know and love, long hair and accessories and all, + warmer richer colours to break away from moreau's cool dark palette)

For Danmien Mornmo, every time I write this man he is drinking wine in a black silk robe, at sunset, like I cannot stop him it’s his life’s true calling and his default state

uhhhh aesthetically he is.....goran visnjic in a variety of suits. theres not much different here. he usually looks well put together unless it’ll benefit him not to; when he’s mad at eliot, he’s in the full suit. further into the au when he’s pressing on eliot's Sense Of Loyalty or Protective Nature Tee Em he’s either got the tie and the jacket off or he’s gone back 2 the robe, hair ungelled. he’s not actually more vulnerable either way but he is Signifying that he is. Stratégique

vibes for the lads: we're taking the dog metaphor and running a marathon with it. for anyone who has read my eliot/moreau fics u know abt my devil+hellhound bullshit for them and i am back on that wholeheartedly with this au. eliot's slamming the Devotion button in his brain like "i would like 2 feel Something. something. Something" and moreaus like "obviously he's doing Fine, very normal and functional, i'm gonna send him to the states to run a grift on sophie fucking devereaux". wise

the VIBES did i say dog metaphor. corrosive loyalty. found family but you're screaming very loudly about it. rediscovering ur personhood via robinhood shenanigans. moreau as a corrupting and consuming force. eliot is about 35% human person and the rest is just static. the vibes they are bad <3

♫ for listenable vibes i've got a chronological eliot playlist here, a moreau playlist here, & a pre-canon eliot/moreau playlist over here ♫

[POMES from the pics: first poem is from i never figured how to get free by donika kelly; second is from hunter's moon by yves olade.

quotes are a modified quote from the zoo job and a moreau line from the show, respectively]

thank u for coming 2 my rambling if u made it this far i hope u have a wonderful day :)

[highgaarden]

ok so bc I'm all like DON'T GIVE UP THE SUPERPOWERS wrt Caro rn I thought why not request a canon-compliant superhero non-AU for Caro where somewhere down the line she decides to ~use her powers for good~ and do the vigilante thing, mask and everything (no stupid impractical costume tho). Extra points if she and Bonnie form a whole Witch/Vampire superhero team. Klaus can read abt it in the paper and figure out it's Caro+Bonnie and be amused and be into it. ♥♥♥

i tried my best. also, i have no clue what’s going on in the originals, but from scraps i get an a very helpful explanation from my friend anne, i sort of got the gist of it, tried to work more of the plot into this, and then decided to just… not. much apologies, please be kind to my v. confused self should you decide to leave a review.

12:51;

or: a superheroes origin story in five parts. 

Klaus/Caroline, Bonnie/Damon | wc. 3705 | ch. 1/5

read on: AO3 / ff.net

.

.

—

PartOne

InWhich Everybody’s Week Must Have Been Pretty Rough

—

 .

.

The weekend after Klaus escaped from his wall, he sat down in his studywith three bottles of liquor and double that amount of fresh blood, a steakcooked medium rare, and five years’ worth of newspapers to catch up with theworld.

Freya regarded him curiously. “You could have done away with the mess.We just ordered those new tablets.”

Rebekah was much ruder about the piles he left. She was probably stillmad she had had to miss four seasons of Supernaturalin order to save his skin.

Klaus didn’t answer them. He continued skimming the pages with aprevailing interest, rubbing ink and paper between his fingers. He soon foundthat he hadn’t missed much in his Marcel-imposed exile; that the mundanities oflife had persevered through the years.

His thoughts started to wonder when he was three-years deep into hiscatching up. Nothing caught his eye, and he was starting to feel the gratitudeof being able to sit in a comfortable armchair as opposed to being shackled toa floor dusted with rubble chip away.

Until he saw it.

He read the little opinion piece, then read it again, and a third timefor good measure.

And then he called Damon Salvatore.

—

At that point, not even Damon knew of their little hijinks despite havingmoved himself into their apartment. He used the pretence of “keeping an eye onthem” to make it past the front door. The living room became his sanctum santorum, and the couch he tookrefuge in constantly smelled like booze and Doritos.

Caroline was not happy with this arrangement, and made sure to be veryvocal about it every chance she got.

Sometimes it ranged from loud, to shrill, towake-your-neighbours-up-at-3am-because-Damon-you-fuck-you-left-your-underwear-in-my-laundry-basket piercing.

Tonight, Damon had the apartment to himself, and was glad for the peaceand quiet. Caroline was out on a date, and Bonnie was at the library borrowinga book. She was always at the library borrowing books, and he liked tellingpeople how bookish she was in a tone that was both patronizing and fond. It hadtaken some time, but he had finally perfected it.

In the middle of his Grey’sAnatomy rerun (“Denny? You chosea dying sack of meat over Alex? Really,Izzie?” he yelled at the tv), his phone rang.

It was Klaus. He hadn’t heard from the fucker in more than a decade, andwas immediately suspicious.

“City Morgue,” he answered cautiously.

“Just to be clear, you’re still second best,” came the familiar gout ofKlaus’s voice. “I only called you because Stefan’s number seems to not beworking, mate.”

“That’s ‘cause it’s not,” Damon said. “How do you still have mine?”

“If I wanted idle chit chat I would’ve resurrected Finn again.”

Damon muted the tv and got to his feet. “And yet here you are, makingidle chit chat.”

“I merely called to enquire about Caroline and Bonnie’s wellbeing.”

“They’re fine,” Damon said shortly.

“You best make sure they’re getting adequate rest for all thecrime-fighting they’re doing,” Klaus said, and killed the line.

Damon spat out his bourbon.

That’s how it all started, really.

—

Caroline was having a crummy night. The sole of her shoe had torn awayas she was chasing her assailant across the rooftops of Midtown, and it nowflapped with every step she took, and slowed her down considerably.

“I’m gonna get you, Raul!” she yelled, to make up for how she was losinghim, fast. “Your album sucked!”

Raul the Eurovision Vampire came to a screeching halt. He was screechingquite literally, because of all the insults Caroline had hurled at him in thepast week of stalking him, this one hurt the most.

“And your win last year?” Caroline continued as she hauled herself overa crumbling ledge. “Total pandering.”

Raul hissed and bared his fangs. “You know nothing of talent, sillygirl. If you did you wouldn’t be spending your nights in cowardice, hiding yourface with a gaudy mask. A poor man’s Catwoman.”

Caroline bristled, because it had taken her and Bonnie splurging on asewing course in Uptown to get their stitching just right.

“And you would’ve gotten more than a deal sponsoring mattresses afteryou won Eurovision,” she retorted, and Raul actually looked pained.

Actual, legit pain.

Caroline sighed. “Look, I’ll cut you a deal. See this stake here? Iwon’t stick it in your heart if you meet my conditions.”

Raul warily eyed the stake she was twirling between her fingers.Normally he would have told her to kiss his ass, but he was cornered, and hedidn’t fancy becoming a splat on the sidewalk.

That, and he was afraid of heights.

“And the conditions are?” he asked finally.

Caroline took a moment to rip the failing sole completely off her shoe.It came off with one clean pull, and when she looked up Raul was still there,which meant there was still hope for a redemption arc for him.

She gave him a winsome smile. “Do you have a pen?”

—

Bonnie slid in through her bedroom window, heady with glory. She hadgotten better at sneaking in and out at odd hours, but evidently not by much,since she managed to wake Damon up.

This was because he was in her bed when she threw herself on it.

“Damon, what the hell?”

Damon awoke with a snort. “A-ha! Proofof your foolhardy life choices!”

Bonnie rolled her eyes and unhooked her cape. She made a mental note to passCaroline twenty dollars. “Took you long enough to realize.”

“I am living with hoodwinks.”Damon pouted. “How could you not have let me in on this secret?”

“Damon, you helped me with laundry last week. You literally foldedpieces of my costume. It had my alter ego name on stitched across the front.”She swung her feet and walked to the paper partition by her dresser, where shewiggled out of her outfit safe from Damon’s prying eyes into a worn Whitmoresweater and blue shorts with lightning patterns on them.

“Are those anti-aging potions you’re brewing finally screwin’ with yourhead?” Damon was still on a roll. “You know how I had to find out? Klaus!”

“Klaus is alive?” Bonnie asked.

“Yes, and even in his state of barely living he ousted you and BlondeDistraction’s sly night crime-kicking.”

Bonnie started to respond, but then got sidetracked. “Blonde Distraction?”

“Uh – yeah.” He fiddled with his phone. “Blonde Distraction and FeistyFire.”

“That is fucking terrible,” Bonnie said mildly. “And not even ournames.”

“That’s what I call you in my blog, which I only update when I’m drunk. I’vebeen following you for years. Checkout the threads!” Damon waved his phone in her face.

“Are you drunk right now?” she asked.

“Yes,” Damon said sulkily, “but only half-stupid. You were never at thelibrary, were you?”

“Well, you were really sweet about it—”

“And you kept missing all those scrabble/pizza nights!” Damon howledinto his hands, betrayal gutting him like a fish.

“Damon,” Bonnie narrowed her eyes. “I’m tired. “The next time you spendthe night in my bed, I’m burning your brains out.”

“Reduced to being treated as one of your petty criminals,” Damonsniffed. “So be it. Our friendship always had an expiry date, huh?”

Damon slinked out of her room. Bonnie considered calling after him, butfigured she’d reason in the morning. For now, she had a huge bruise in her sideto nurse, and sleep was calling.

—

It started with scaring off new vampires from innocent clubgoers, andthen keeping the pasty creep-o’s who lived in the apartment adjacent to theirsin line when bodies started piling up in their shared dumpster.

Caroline hadn’t blown all her cash for an apartment in New York just forit to be crawling with the diseased, depravity and blood, so she took it uponherself to clean it up. An act of charity, if you will.

At night, she donned a mask and put on sensible boots. No stupidimpractical spandex for her, nor did she for a minute entertain midriff-baringleather, no matter how hot she might have looked.

Sipping from her thermos of warmed AB, she kneeled by stone gargoylesand prowled through the night. Afterwards she would either jump from rooftop torooftop, or practice her parkour, feeling invincible and (not gonna lie) reallyfucking cool.

At around 1am she got the read from Bonnie (in other words, Bonnietexted her in their coded-emoji) that their target for the night had arrived.

From five stories above she followed the sound of his footsteps throughthe alleyway, waiting to catch a heartbeat. When none came, she knew that hewas the one. His steps faltered when he heard a noise behind him. Caroline tookthe opportunity to jump down on him.

“Hello,” she smiled sweetly, when he was thrashing and spittingunderneath her. She was sitting on his back, which couldn’t be comfortable.

“Killing. Maiming. Money-laundering.” Bonnie came slowly from the mouthof the alleyway, her cape flowing behind her. “That last one’s kind of random,but the other shit we have on you—yikes.”

Caroline gathered his hair in her gloved hands and yanked hard. Thevampire cried out, enraged, but didn’t look away from her piercing gaze.

“You’ve got a locker full of civilians waiting like lambs forslaughter,” she said slowly, so he might not miss the threat in her voice.“Tell us where they are and you get to live.”

“I’m gonna have to call your bluff,” he rasped. “I’ve cut a pretty gooddeal, and ain’t no stinkin’ blonde and her twitchy sidekick are gonna stop me.”

Bonnie’s face darkened.

“Oooh,” Caroline whistled. “Bad choice of words there, bud. She’s not mysidekick. We’re partners. I kick ass, she takes names. Sometimes I take names,and she kicks ass. Though ‘kick’ might not be the right verb here…”

“I prefer not having to touch you scum,” Bonnie said, and from herfingers erupted flames.

Caroline smiled, eyes shining brightly in the fear that Bonnie hadincited into the now-still vampire.

“What are vampires most afraid of?” Caroline whispered into his fear.

“Werewolf venom.”

Caroline clicks her tongue. “No, the other thing.”

The vampire, cold sweat on his forehead, hesitated. ‘Uh—stakes?”

Caroline knuckled the base of his skull. “Fire, you moron. She’s waving it right in your face!”

It didn’t help that he passed out immediately.

Bonnie sighed and dropped her hands. The alley dimmed once again. “Canwe talk about this whole intimidation tactic thing?”

Caroline refused to look her in the eye.

—

It took about twenty minutes for him to come to, by which time Carolinehad gotten bored of sitting on his back and had decided to chain him to thedumpster instead.

After they heckled and tortured the information out of him, Carolinepulled out the usual contract – stating that no further harm would come to himfrom their hands if he got the hell out of the city and signed along the dottedline – when he started monologueing and posturing in a way that was really, really familiar.

Caroline pulled the pen away from his trembling grasp for it. Shesquinted in the dark alley, trying to make out his eyes.

“Caroline?” Bonnie asked, but Caroline barely heard.

The vampire was still monologueing, and Caroline felt a rising anger.She knew a compelled gaze anywhere.

“Damn it, Bon.”

Her fist swung out of her own accord, knocking the vampire out cold.There was a satisfying crack accompanying the slump of his neck, and Carolinedusted her hands off.

Bonnie eyed his body with distaste. “Harsh, Care. Don’t you usually waitfor them to sign the contract first?”

—

True to his word, Damon had indeed started a blog following the accountsof Blonde Distraction and Feisty Fire (not their actual names, but given thefact that he only ever blogged when he was drunk, he never bothered to learntheir real names) and their vigilante crime-fighting on his blog, WatchOutVillainz.com.

It was a smorgasbord of garish colour, Comic Sans, and badly-wordedheadings.

Klaus would never admit it, but he loved reading it.

He followed it with the same tenacity Caroline had for new episodes ofThe Bachelor, and one night even set up a username for himself to partake inthe lengthy discussions over who Blonde Distraction and Feisty Fire might be.

His username was entirely anonymous, and he enjoyed having a persona toparade as he took down trolls and ventured the tags, verbally maiming anyoneand everyone who dared speak ill of Blonde Distraction or Feisty Fire.

Granted, he didn’t care much for the witch, but thought that Carolinewould like it if he were to stand up for her too, so he did.

Damon showed up at his hotel room one night sullen-faced. “Get off mywebsite.”

“Make me,” Klaus said, typing progressively faster on his keyboard.

Damon failed to make him, and returned home, turning all his loyalfollowers on one hybrid_master_127. Unfortunately, Klaus seemed to have accrueda cluster of minions of his own in his short time of perusingWatchOutVillainz.com, and they threatened to hack into the mainframe of one ofhis life’s most precious work.

Damon, having limited knowledge of IT, highly doubted the existence of amainframe and whether or not it could be hacked.

In the end decided to play it safe, and Klaus stayed.

—

The way Caroline figured out it was Klaus who had been sending thugvamps her way was almost as fast as him discovering their true identities asthe Vigilantes of the Manhattan Bridge Overpass.

A week after Damon had almost thrashed his hotel room, Klaus opens thedoor to his magnificently ransacked quarters. Caroline was sitting on whatappeared to be the cracked granite of his bathtub, in his living room, with herlegs crossed. She was still in her mask and boots.

“What is wrong with you?” sheyelled. “Why can’t you pick up the phone and call like a normal person?”

“That would have ruined the fun,” Klaus replied. “Besides, would youhave answered?”

Caroline hesitated.

“I thought so.”

“You never answered any of mycalls.”

“I was chained up in a wall, love.”

Caroline considered this. “Hm.”

Klaus picked his way towards her, straightening lamps as he went. Minutegoosefeathers floated about his shoulders; the pillows had all been spearedonto the ceiling fan like kebabs. “It was all too easy to suss out it was you.”

Caroline refused to bite. Instead, she stayed silent, watching him comecloser and closer.

“You offered them redemption instead of gutting them alive, in documentform to boot.” Klaus sounded reproachful and he righted an upset table to hidehis exasperation. “Furthermore, Bonnie made no secret of her pyromanicabilities. She was always very artful with that certain power of hers.”

“You compelled yourself a massacre just to draw me out,” she hissed. “Ihappen to take my craft very seriously—”

“I know, love. I’m not laughing.” And indeed he wasn’t. In fact, he sortof admired the spirit in which she undertook her task. In all honesty, he believedthis to be a phase—it took him a while to process the fact that she’d chosen tospend her eternity (or at least, a significant early part of it) doing this.

“So why are you here?” Caroline asked.

“Because.” He paused. Why was hehere? Papa Tunde’s torment had left him withered and raw; Hayley and Freya hadgone to the ends of the earth to release him and when he’d woken up Hope waswell in her teen years. Despite the world staying to same, too much of what hecared about had changed. He needed—he needed to make sure, needed to see forhimself, how she was.

Perhaps she was right. A phone call would have worked better.

“I wanted to offer my services,” is what he decided on at last.

Caroline snorted so loud he thought it was a piece of his ceiling fallingon them.

—

“I know all the criminals in this city,” he insisted, dogging her downthe street. Caroline walked remarkably fast in the night. She had left her maskin the debris of his room, stating she had ‘plenty more’.

“I’d rather go to vampire jail,” she told him sedately.

“Ah, that rather poorly masked vampire rehab you set up,” he said,falling into step with her. “The Elizabeth-Bill Institute for the MorallyBankrupt. I was just short of amused as to what an easy target you madeyourself.”

“And yet the only person who managed to figure it all out was you,” shesaid.

“Well—Kol did, too. We were playing crime-bingo with your exploits.”Klaus grinned. “I was one money-launder away from a win, so I decided to pullthings to my favour.”

“I’ll wall you in myself,” she seethed.

“Oh, where will you possibly find the time in between all thiscrime-fighting?”

Caroline whipped around, fangs bared. “Leave me alone, Klaus.”

“How are the twins?” he asked gently.

“None of your business.”

“They should be around Hope’s age, shouldn’t they?”

“Stop talking about them.”

Caroline took a detour through an alleyway, and with more agility thanKlaus expected, climbed her way up the side of a building, all to get away fromhim.

Klaus weighed his options, then hefted himself up after her.

He found her sitting on a rooftop edge, the city pulsating beneath them.He sat down beside her and was surprised when she offered him a thermos ofblood. It was still warm.

“Where were you keeping that?” he asked admiringly, studying her outfit.

She sent him a look that could kill, and went back to countingheadlights. “Please don’t tell anyone,” she said quietly, after a while.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he said. He cleared his throat and glanced ather. “When did it start?”

Caroline shuts her eyes. “A few years ago. Josie and Lizzie were growingup pretty fast. Alaric—he, well. Didn’t want me to have…” she gestured vaguely,“words were exchanged. I decided that if I could do my part to help in anyother way, I’d do it.”

“You’ll soon be bored with the futility of it, I imagine.”

“I’ve got an end goal in mind,” she said absently.

After a fashion he realized she had stopped counting headlights and wasfocused on a window in the building across the cobweb of streets. Two girls,remarkably alike, were pulling the curtains closed for the night.

“They’re nocturnal creatures,” he said softly. “If I could venture a guess,just like their mother.”

Caroline didn’t answer. Instead, she rested her head on his shoulder. Hestiffened in surprise, but she didn’t comment on it, neither did she move away.“Next time, just call. You can’t base my reactions on the girl you knew tenyears ago.”

“Some things will always remain singular,” he said. He wasn’t speakingabout her. She hoped she saw it in the look he was giving her.

Caroline pulled away slowly. For a long time, she only looked at him.Klaus took a chance and reached for her hand, after which she tangled herfingers in his. They stayed that way for only a short moment, but the feelingof her palm, soft in his, lingered long after she’d slid her thermos back intoits hiding place on her body and left.

—

Damon had taken to fixing them breakfast in the wee hours of the morningwhen they finally returned. He reasoned that it was the least he could do, whatwith all the slander he keeps slinging their way on his website.

“To blindside the scrutinizing eyes of the public!” he insisted,flipping pancakes.

However, when Caroline returned home with an extra guest, his spatulafell onto the island with a smack.

“I refuse to feed him,” he told Bonnie. So offended was he that Carolinehad brought Klaus home that he refused to speak to Caroline too. Looking rightthrough them, he pointed out, “And I only made pancakes for three.”

Damon gestured angrily at the table, where three immaculate plates piledhigh with pancakes and cream had been set.

Klaus scowled. “But there’s four more, burning, by the way, on theskillet.” He tried not to sound too indignant.

“You kidding me? These are all for Bonnie!”

As the two immortal beings squabbled, Caroline speared a triangle ofpancake with her fork. Bonnie sipped her glass of orange juice. It felt strangefor the apartment to be so full, especially with the presence of Damon’s entireliquor cabinet dotting every corner.

Klaus finally wrestled himself a seat next to Caroline, but not beforeflicking off Damon’s shirt that had been slung over the back of the chair with dispassion.

“That’s it! I’m done! You can make breakfast yourselves from now on!” Damon yanked off his apron and was gonewith a huff.

“Does this happen a lot?” Klaus enquired, sniffing around a piece ofbacon.

“More times than you can imagine,” Bonnie said.

—

In the coming days, Klaus visited more often. His hotel room had beenproperly demolished, he took to reminding Caroline, who sighed and held out atowel for him to use her shower.

Bonnie delighted in the fact that she now has leverage against having abroody roommate/parasite, seeing as Caroline had one of her own now, too.

Damon continued to be miserable.

Klaus continued to goad them with his offer.

Caroline and Bonnie continued their crime-fighting.

“Let’s not make this routine,” Bonnie told Caroline as she garrotted avampire who had been hell-bent on chowing down on a family of four. “By nextweek we kick them out.”

“You got it, Bon,” Caroline said, waving the contract in the chokingvampire’s face. “We’re burning the couch. And can we finally talk about that cape of yours?”

Bonnie rolled her eyes, but nodded her agreement as the vampire veryreluctantly signed her name along the dotted line.

—

tbc

9B��`

[kkukkung]

it makes me happy that wonho gets to go to his mums cafe? it seems like he goes there a lot and i wouldn't really expect him to get that much freedom or free time? so i'm really happy ahhh +other idols going there! i hope the other members go sometimes toooo

jdjfienzhd you’re so pretty!!!! I love your hair! 😭me too!!!!!! tbh i’m still so surprised he gets to do that??? feel like generally monsta x has a lot more freedom than they did in 2015 + the first half of 2016, especially bc i’m p sure they have their phones and idk… just generally they seem to be so much more comfortable navigating the industry and it makes me happy :’>

more replies (dated oldest to newest) under the cut~

youre so beautiful i cry

omg… i…. thank you im sry im replying so so late (so late that… i forgot the context for it….) but rly… thank u… idk how to respond adequately to kind anons but rly i think ur all so so lovely for taking the time just to tell someone something nice like this tyvm i hope ur faring well anon and ur… v beautiful too i Know it… 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

Don’t look @ me but minhyuk in the kihyun cooking vlive was S*xy he was a lil dirty and mean and Real Boy™ it was……h*t anyways whns he gonna kick flip me outta this hemisphere

shut up fjfkhsggjk me too he’s like… such a dirty sock sometimes but he’s MY dirty sock u know… my favourite minhyuk is when he peels off his 50000 layers of fake personas and u see a glimmer of chaotic glee flit by in his alien countenance i love him sm sm sm when he’s a bit gross n mean n Filthy…. that’s my boy!!!!!!! that’s my boY!!!

tbh i never really thought Kihyun is perverted so i was a little suprised when it came up, and some people are saying now that they felt it (lol?), u said you also knew it, im sorry this so stupid but im really confused, like i dunno i always knew kihyun had an attitude but a perv ? lmao (not conplaining, just confused and a little lost, love ya) bye

omg lol sorry darling this isn’t stupid at all! i was 50% kidding 50% srs… he’s not… like actually ~perverted~ (none of them rly are??? but mb ck has the most Curiosity and he + mh make the most… dirty jokes… + wonho sometimes but he’s more happy in his softness ANYWAY) idk this is a bit irrelevant but just to explain, language-wise i always associate korean closer w chinese so even if im watching smth in eng sub i translate the subs into… chinese… kind of… to understand it better… and the word 변태 (byuntae) is the equivalent of 变态 (biantai) in chinese and while it means pervert/perverted it’s also just a general term for being strange/abnormal (in fact that’s its correct/real meaning + the former is more slang)… i think minhyuk was playing around with the connotations of it as well as just poking fun at kihyun bc he likes seeing kihyun look indignant! that said my 50% srsness in relation to this is… bc… um… i see kihyun as being… mb… into Some Things skjhfgkj but i won’t elaborate here!

minhyuk called wonho “hoseokie-hyung” once during fighter promotions if you didn’t know already 👀

me: *digging a 165cm long hole in the exact shape of my body* this is fine

Kihyun just wants to take up space .. as much as possible 💦😩

(this was in relation to when i called him out for manspreading…) maximum surface area for more efficient diffusion of his [redacted] [redacted]

Do you check out blogs?? hehe

yes sure jus like…. link me… jkfshg i tend to follow content creators/ppl who write interesting tags and i try not to follow anyone too much younger/older than me, that’s abt all! :>

minhyuk cuddling on jooheon during the no exist prologue was so 👌👌 sapping all of jooheon’s warmth while looking so soft and cute how does minhyuk do it 😩😩

it’s rly his Thing hm hm not to get… sappy but he’s so… full of love and jus wants to be physically close w everyone also when will he stop playing w his bottom lip… official minhyuk emoticon: >:3c

Annie your new mobile theme is so pink and pretty!!!!

tysm!!! sorry this is a late reply so it’s not… entirely relevant anymore jhsgfg but… i think i’m always going to have a pastel colour + bunny theme on this blog it’s my Branding now…. ty ty! 💖

“Reminds me of raw chicken” lmaooooo same 😂😂

(in relation to this post fjdkshg) i lov my uncooked chicken boy

U kno that clip of Michael Scott on the office where he yells “I’m gonna kill myself and it’s your fault” that’s me…. every time monsta x do something….. every time they change their hair colour….. I want death….I’m such a dramatic hoe

me!!!! too!!!! rly a lot more excited for monsta x’s new hair colours than i am… abt Most Things lol… happy w everyone’s hair colours except wonho’s ://// pls go darker

i legit think your tags are the best thing ever 

lov u! my tags are v messy and mostly whatever goes thru my mind in that given moment before i hit the rb tbh but i’m glad u enjoy them! 💖💖

What’s your favorite wonho pic?

currently:

Omg have u seen that mnet ep that had mx on right after their debut and it had hyorin and soyou on too and minhyuk was litrally. Losing his mind like they talked about his ideal type comment I think and soyou called him cute and then later he got put on soyou’s team for some game and he straight up lost his mind he was so excited dlfmgnk can he. Relax for one sec

jkdfshggkjsjdkfh i don’t remember this???? i feel like i probably watched smth like it a long time ago like i rmbr a few very awkward mx/sistar interactions after they just debuted. but this. i have to find this and watch it gjkshkjdfg. minhyuk has… no chill he’s not capable of being a normal human being… but also why is this me i would.. die if soyou looked @ me so umm……………lov my relatable man… my love rival… real talk it’s v cute that he likes her n i think generally lmh has a good people sense/knows what he wants from others

(the anon w the younger brother here!) he .. actually said wonho looked like a wolf???? im so ?????? abt that like where did it come from … also jooheon looks like a friend, changkyun just looks “overwhelmingly fed up” apparently????, and according to him hyungwon just has the （ ͡° _ゝ ͡° ） face ,,v interesting …

(part 1 of this!) omgggg this is still v cute i don’t see the ?? wolfiness of wonho (i am… after all… tumgler user bunnywonho…), but i can see how jooheon is shaped like a friend + ck is… finished… done… a lil bit dead inside-looking but not Really like that, n hyungwon… sjhfg i can… kinda see that too… ty for sharing this btw it’s v wholesome

♥️ sending you good vibes –an admirer

omg PLEASE “an admirer” ur too much… thank u though im sending good vibes back sweetheart 💕💕💕💕 got plenty of Good Feelings lately ily thank u thank u 💕

MINHYUK MAKES YOU THINK HE’S GOOD AND PURE. THEN HE BECOMES THIS EVIL LITTLE THING. LIKE A PUPPY CONSTANTLY BITING YOUR FEET

i feel like minhyuk stans are divided btwn… wanting to Love him intensely n lowkey wanting 2 smack him ??

BYE WHAT TH DOES “Die under kihyun” MEAN

(in relation to the tags on this post jkgfhsjkhf) IDK i think i just meant he isn’t as…. bullied w kihyun as the other members often are?? they operate on the same level… it wasn’t anything dirty if u were thinking it was…👀👀👀 im a pure stan w a bunny themed blog… 

So do you have a link to this sexuality analysis 👀

SORRY for the late reply it’s just here! don’t rly agree w some of it but other parts were insightful!

jdjfienzhd you’re so pretty!!!! I love your hair! 😭

hfddsjfkjsfjk thank u i’m jus…. a bean…. navigating the cosmos at the same time as monsta x…. and u, cutie……….. tysm my ego grows bigger w every nice msg i get… hope smth good happens to u today ily! 💓💓

that video of the guy ripping his pants n his dick flopping out is wonhos nightmare during every performance when he has to wear tight clothes

BE QUIET JKSHGSF I NEVER READ THIS ASK

is wonho turning 25 or 26?? im confused

he was born in 1993 officially (altho there is some speculation abt whether or not he was rly born in 92) but if we’re going by that then technically he’s turned 24, korean age 25 (bc ur 1 when ur born)… but he’s 26 by the lunar calendar… v confusing i know

Wow can’t believe youre a wonhoe anti 😕😕😕😖😖😖😧😧😧🤒🤒🤒🤒🤒

shh sdhjgkf but real talk i love wonho + minhyuk in v different… unquantifiable ways :’00