#i'm still not sur e how to go about it

[cinnamon-stheater]

Not sur eif this is what you mean by requests, but Nene and Rui stumbling into L/n, Tsukasa, and Shizuku as kids and being theater freaks with Tsukasa. Sprinkle in a childhood crush for Ruikasa too for an added flavor

☆Theater Freaks?!!

Aaa this one was a little hard to write because I'm not very familiar with Shizukasa or Ruikasa. Also I saw this request 6 days late (I forgor this blog existed T-T) so sorry about it being later than normal! I also have school for nine hours everyday (except friday) so yayyy Apologies for any ooc stuff or mistakes!! I proofread like.. half of it Despite all that this was really fun to write! Thank you for the request!!☆ (that is what i mean by requests too lol) Onwards with the show~☆

"HA HA HA!"

"R-Rui..? What's that loud noise..?" Nene sidled close to Rui, her lips tugging down in a concerned expression. They were standing under the relieving shade of a tree per Nene's request, sheltered from the sweltering sunlight.

"Hmm.." Rui glanced over in the direction of the sound. A group of kids were gathered together among the scattered flowers of the grassy park field. As he studied them, his guess to what they were doing became more and more plausible. Were they... performing?

"I, Tenma Tsukasa, will save Saki - er, Princess Saki - from you, evil witch!" A golden-haired boy jabbed his finger at a girl across from him, a boisterous voice trailing out of his wide open mouth. "You will not go un.. unpunished!"

"Oh, Tsukasa-kun, your acting is so good!" the girl said cheerfully, her blue eyes sparkling in the sun. The first thing Rui noticed about her was that she was stunning. The second thing he noticed was that she looked oddly familiar, even though he was sure he'd never met her. Maybe he'd seen her on TV somewhere.

"Shizuku!" Tsukasa was pouting. "You're the witch!"

"Oh - sorry!" Shizuku tried her best to look menacing, but she still looked much too smiley. "Um.. abracadabra! Now you're a frog!"

"Aaah! The evil witch got me! Ichika, Honami, save me!" Tsukasa cried out and dramatically flung himself to the floor, causing a loud thump. Rui found himself captivated by the performance - were all actors this committed?

A black-haired girl around Nene's age stammered audibly, frantically waving a flimsy twig around. "U-umm..! H-human! Human!" She flung the twig at the boy.

"Human!" The girl beside her copied her, weakly throwing her twig forward.

"HA HA!" Tsukasa declared, leaping up from where he was squatted on the ground, trying to mimic a frog. "Your evil plan failed! Now give Princess Saki back!"

"No!" Shizuku swished her stick wand through the air. "I need to steal her magic! Shii-chan! Fight him!"

"E-eh..?" A girl with short gray hair clutched a stick in her hand. "Do I have to..? He's kinda loud.."

"It looks like they're putting on a show," Rui observed, watching the boy Tsukasa trying to get the girl to fight him. "Nene, do you want to join?"

"U-uh.." Nene stuttered, her cheeks reddening.

"If you don't, that's fine," Rui reassured her with a smile. He knew just how shy Nene could be. He remembered their first meeting well - she'd barely spoken to him, instead preferring to read a picture book in the corner of his room. But he also knew of her awe and fascination towards theater - a fact that he could understand and relate to perfectly well. It was that fact that had brought them together, and that fact that was now pulling him towards the group.

Nene seemed to be able to see how much Rui wanted to go, too. Summoning her courage, she nodded, following close behind him as he confidently walked over. Well, maybe not too confidently - he was well aware of his past attempts to make friends and do shows. Would these kids be any different?

Surprisingly, Rui found himself desperately hoping they would be.

"Saki! I'm here to save you!" Tsukasa charged forward, brandishing his stick with ferocity. "Begone, evil witch!" He lightly smacked the blue-haired girl on the arm. She gracefully helped herself to the floor before the boy sprinted towards the last girl in the group, the resemblance between her and Tsukasa obvious.

"Yay! You're so cool, Tsukasa!" Saki jumped up and down, smiling brightly. Rui started clapping, praising the performance. Was this really what shows could be? He'd seen a lot of them, yet this one was different - it was performed by a group of kids in the park, but somehow, that made it even more magical.

"Haha! I'm glad you liked it!" Tsukasa approached Rui, his chin raised proudly. He studied Rui and Nene for a moment, then grinned widely. "Do you two want to be in our show?"

Well, that saved asking. Rui nodded. "I'd be happy to." He could feel his heart beat more strongly in his chest. Maybe it didn't make much of a difference to other people, but he'd been asked to join this time. Not the other way around.

"Allow me to introduce myself! I am Tenma Tsukasa, world future star!" The boy puffed out his chest proudly.

"I'm Tenma Saki!" the girl with the yellow-pink twintails said happily. "Tsukasa's younger sister!"

"I'm Hinomori Shizuku!" the blue-haired girl smiled. "This is my cute younger sister, Shii-chan!"

"Shiho," the gray-haired girl mumbled, looking away embarrassed.

"My - my name is Hoshino Ichika!" The girl with dark hair stepped up beside Shiho, with the other human-magic-girl right behind her.

"I-I'm Mochizuki Honami..!" she sttutered in a soft voice. "What's your name?"

"My name's Kamishiro Rui," Rui introduced himself. "You can call me Rui. This is Kusanagi Nene." He gestured to the girl hiding shyly behind him.

" You - you can call me Nene!" she squeaked.

"Nice to meet you, Rui and Nene!" Shizuku greeted. "You can call me Shizuku!"

"Call me Tsukasa! If you're going to be in our show, you need a role," Tsukasa said thoughtfully. "Hm.." His eyes darted over the two of them, and Rui felt himself growing slightly self-conscious. "Aha!" he said after a moment. "Nene can be a mermaid! And Rui... can be an alchemist!"

"A mermaid?" Nene's eyes sparkled.

"An alchemist?" Rui tilted his head to one side. He wasn't against the idea - it was almost similar to what he liked doing - but more confused why Tsukasa had chosen that.

"Yes! Alchemists can do sciencey-magic!" Tsukasa seemed really hyped up about the idea, so Rui agreed.

"Okay. I'll be an alchemist!"

"I'm a prince, Saki is a princess, and Shizuku is the evil witch that has captured Saki," Tsukasa explained. "Ichika and Honami are fairies on my side, and Shiho is a knight protecting Shizuku! Nene can be on my side, and Rui can be on Shizuku's side!"

"Wait, didn't you act this play out already?" Rui asked, a little surprised.

"We actually acted it out five times already!" Shizuku told him. "It was so fun!"

"The plot changed every single time!" Saki added.

"Oh - I see," Rui nodded. So it was like acting out five different shows with the same roles and idea.

"And now that we have two more people, it will be funner!" said Tsukasa. "Let the show begin!" He scurried atop a boulder and brandished his stick in the air.

"W-wait!" Nene cried. "We don't even know what we're doing!"

"Improv, Nene!" Shizuku beamed.

"It was like this every time!" Saki agreed. "Come on, Nene! You have to help Tsukasa save me! Don't you want to beat Rui?"

Rui saw the significance of that last statement sink into his friend.

"O-okay!" she managed, and Saki pulled her over to Ichika and Honami.

"Rui, let's try our best to defeat Tsukasa!" Shizuku encouraged him.

"How many times have you defeated him?"

"Zero," Shiho answered flatly.

"Maybe I can change that." A thoughtful grin spread over Rui's features. He hadn't brought any of his robots or materials to make something big, but maybe he could modify Shizuku's stick somehow...

"Oh! I brought a bubble wand with me today," Rui said. "Perhaps you could use it as a wand, Shizuku."

Shizuku gasped. "That's a great idea!"

"What?!" Tsukasa yelled from the top of the boulder. "Alas, Alchemist Rui, your efforts are in vain! I will save Saki and defeat you!"

A feeling of warmth spread through Rui, and a sort of giddy sensation creeped up into his heart. He hadn't been able to freely associate with people like this before. They weren't calling him different or a genius... had he finally found people he could be himself around? But he hadn't exactly built anything, meaning they didn't know him fully yet...

He pushed the thought out of his head. Even if they didn't know the full him, was that okay? He glanced over and saw Nene smiling with Saki and the others, spotted, Shizuku's grinning face, looked up at Tsukasa atop the boulder, gazing down at him with a determined smile. A ray of sunlight slanted down against him, lighting up his face.

"I'm ready, Tsukasa. Let the show begin."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry this took so long :'<<< sorry it's so long too hehe

I hope you liked it!☆

[nortism]

Nor's Les Mis Fic Recommendations

I've been scouring les mis ao3 for a few months now so here are my fav fics I've found. I've tried my best to tag tumblrs where I can but let me know if you are the author of any of these and I'll tag you!

Three Days (or The One Where Javert and Valjean Take a Road Trip Through France and Raise a Child) by zamwessel

Rating: E

Ships: Javert/Jean Valjean

Summary:

Javert calls what he thinks is Valjean's bluff about needing three days to find the child Cosette and intercede for her. The Inspector comes along for the ride -- and gets much more than he bargained for, in the process.

Notes: First Les Mis fic I ever read and its an absolute banger. It's pretty much exactly what it says on the tin and I'm a sucker for a kid fic so I absolutely adored it.

A Change of Bizarre Kind by M_Moonshade

Rating: E

Ships: Javert/Jean Valjean

Summary:

Six months ago, Doctor Henry Jekyll sought to escape the dramatics of London by coming to M-sur-M. Tonight his murderer pays a visit to the Mayor Madeline. (Being the Curious Case of Inspector Javert and Mister Hyde)

Notes: Criminally underrated. Jekyll and Hyde AU but I went in knowing very little about that book and I could understand what was going on. Each chapter contains bits from the past and present day until the timelines eventually add up which makes the main mystery all the more compelling. Also Fantine is alive and well which is always nice.

Our Souls Still in Fetters by Cinaed

Rating: E

Ships: Javert/Jean Valjean

Summary:

After Javert is assigned to discover a blackmailer within a public-house that caters to men who prefer other men, Valjean is unexpectedly drawn into the case. Together they must stop the blackmailer before any lives can be ruined...including their own.

Notes: This author has so many great Valvert fics but this one is probably my favourite. There's the classic "undercover as a couple" trope as well as old timey gay bars. Also a huge fan of how this author portrays Cosette and Valjean's relationship.

In Defiance of all Geometry by idiopathicsmile

Rating: T

Ships: Combeferre/Enjolras/Grantaire

Summary:

Amis House might not be the biggest student co-op, or the fanciest, but it's got something all its own. Specifically, smoke damage on the kitchen ceiling from that time Courfeyrac lit a political pamphlet on fire. In which there are secrets, pining, pancakes, and revelations, and sometimes the shortest distance between three points is not a triangle but a circle.

Notes: I love a good poly fic and this is one of the best. Also just a generally fun and wholesome friendship fic. Definitely a nice comforting read after all the old man angst I've got on here.

Gimme Gimme Gimme (A Man After Midnight) by Need_To_Comment_Rising (@aromantic-enjolras)

Rating: T

Ships: Courfeyrac/Enjolras, Combeferre/Courfeyrac (Its complicated)

Summary:

Enjolras takes a swig of his drink with everyone else, and then smirks at Courfeyrac over the rim of his glass. "You didn't seem to mind much me being bossy yesterday night when I had you in my bed..." At his side, Grantaire chokes on his drink and starts coughing. But how did we get here, you might ask? Well, let’s rewind. ------- Enjolras and Courfeyrac have had a friends with benefits arrangement for a while. But when Coureyrac starts dating Combeferre, Enjolras is left with the question of where he fits in the new status quo...

Notes: Another poly fic with aromantic!Enjolras. I love fics with unconventional relationship dynamics as well as people actually communciating with each other (though not before there's been some hijinks ofc). Criminally underrated.

How Marius (Painstakingly) Won the Hand of Mlle. Fauchelevent by writingsyrup (@syrupsyche)

Rating: G

Ships: Cosette/Marius

Summary:

When setting out to woo his beloved Cosette, Marius had never imagined that it would bring him to this: sitting at a dining table next to her grim-faced father, and staring at the marble that was Enjolras picking at his peas. Or; Enjolras and Cosette are siblings in 19th century France. Marius has to deal with the consequences of this.

Notes: Probably the best Marius characterisation I've ever read, he's just so awkward and weird bless him. I love a good awkward "meeting the parents" and this filled that hole in my heart. Is part of a wider series but can be read as a standalone.

Omnia mutantur, nihil interit by Apathy and saltedpin

Rating: M

Ships: Javert/Jean Valjean, Cosette/Marius Pontmercy

Summary:

Valjean's panting breath does not belong to him. He scrambles out of the bed and stumbles on too-light feet to the mirror in the corner, although he already knows what he will see. Peering back at him from behind a curtain of dark hair, wide-eyed, is Éponine Thénardier. Jean Valjean awakens one morning from uneasy dreams to find that something quite unexpected has happened during the night.

Notes: Cosette and Javert get bodyswapped and Marius is weirdly into it, if that's not enough to convince you to read this fic then idk how to help you. Not normally a huge body swap fan but this was absolutely hilarious as well as having some genuinely sweet moments. Also Theodule is there which means something to some people.

It's Not the Same Anymore by ShameDumpster (@shamedumpster)

Rating: T

Ships: Enjolras/Grantaire

Summary:

Grantaire is a bookstore clerk in his late twenties, and to everyone’s eternal disbelief, a father. It’s been years since he’s seen anyone from his former group of friends, after a falling out cleaved him from the ABC, but everything changes when Enjolras walks into his bookstore. Can they rekindle their friendship, or something more, while they both come to terms with how their lives have changed over the past decade?

Notes: SO SO GOODDD!! Top tier slowburn kid fic, I could wax poetic about it for days. Had me gripped from start to finish.

Acts of Mercy by cruisedirector and Dementordelta

Rating: M

Ships: Javert/Jean Valjean

Summary:

After witnessing and reporting a murder, Javert is dismissed from the police and takes a job protecting the women in a brothel, where many of his long-held ideas about justice are challenged.

Notes: Breaking, man from the 1800s finds out that life for women is hard. Such a solid redemption arc fic with some really memorable ocs.

Lynx's Claws and Wolf's Mane by Kaleran

Rating: T

Ships: None

Summary:

When he is older, when he is a prison guard, he thinks back to his childhood and realizes he had been considerably fortunate. "Prison is no place for a girl like you," his mother told him often, usually fussing with what rags they could use for clothing. "Forgive me for this, draga mea." And so, instead of a daughter, she pretended to have a son.

Notes: Completely canon compliant except Javert is trans and the impact that has on the story really adds an extra layer to his character that I find really compelling. Warning, it is very depressing bc canon.

[sunken-standard]

So I've been having a Very Bad Week

(as have many of you, I'm sure). Bad enough that I've been considering going to the 24hr mental health crisis center a few towns over (I won't, because I don't want the paper trail; once you sign the intake form it's an automatic 24hr psych hold and I don't want that on any kind of record because Nazis).

So Weds. I decided to switch therapists. I'd only talked to A. like three times I think, and I just wasn't feeling it. My last therapist, J., left the practice in August. Anyway, I called and they were able to get me an appointment with someone new Thursday morning, easy peasy, no grief at all for wanting to switch again so soon.

So I start my intake session with L., everything is normal (giving a very brief synopsis of my history and brain cooties and why I've had 5 therapists in 5 years [3 of them left! I'd still be talking to the very first one if he was still there!], blah blah). Then I say I'm really in crisis, thinking about going to the ER, whatever, and I mention it's because of the election.

I'm not going to lie or bullshit or whatever; my feelings and thoughts are why I'm in therapy in the first place and I shouldn't have to self-censor for anything (except admitting to crimes, but w/e). Anyway, this woman was like "I'm going to assume you voted for Harris?" (uh oh)

"I did."

"Well, mumble mumble, in the spirit of full discolsure, mumble mumble bullshit bullshit--"

"Did you vote for Trump?"

"Mumble mumble blah blah reluctance, yes I did."

"Oh that's all I need to know. Sorry, that's a dealbreaker for me." (I might have been a little clipped or curt, but I'm a blunt person and I don't waste time. I wasn't nasty or demeaning or anything, just completely honest.

"Oh, okay, I'll let the front office know and they'll call you back with a new appointment for someone else."

"Cool, thanks, Take care." All said politely, if a little coolly (compared to my normal customer service warmth; I would call it a baseline for most non-customer service people).

This was at 9:30 am. By 3:30 no one had called, so I figured I would (maybe they got swamped and then forgot, benefit of the doubt, whatever)

So I call. And I find out they decided to have the office manager call me on Monday because of how rude and abusive I was (????!!!!!) and they'd already come out to the reception area to warn all the other therapists of what kind of person I am.

What

The

Fuck

So this woman had lied and twisted everything around, said I told her to shut up, I insisted on knowing who she voted for, I was rude, all this kind of shit. And I can't prove a thing because nothing is recorded or whatever. So it's the professional's word against mine, known crazy person. I was so upset, I was crying on the phone and everything (and even worse, my voice got stupid so it sounded like fake crying, but I couldn't stop it or reign it in).

I made sure to give my side of things. I was very very clear that I never said "shut up" because I just don't talk like that in a professional relationship. I was also clear that she made it political by saying she assumed I voted Harris (which, let's be real, is the same as asking), and that I don't think it's unfair for me to ask the same and make a decision about my treatment based on that answer. Sorry if I don't want to be vulnerable in front of a person who actively voted against my rights as a human being ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So now I have to wait all weekend to see if I'm going to be dismissed from their care, meaning cut off from all my drugs (really don't give a shit about therapy, it doesn't work anyway).

I've mostly calmed down, but I took a lot more drugs than I'm supposed to in combinations I'm really not supposed to just to calm me down enough that I don't think I'm going to have a heart attack, throw up, or violently shit myself from my fight or flight response. (and it only took 27 hours of gross overmedicating to do so!)

Anyway, buckle up kids, this is the future now and this sure as shit ain't going to be an isolated incident.

[youngroyalscatalogue]

Soulmates (part 2)

The Sound of Forever Status: incomplete Rating: M Author: CharlotteFeli Summary: Wille a toujours été en retard. Alors, ce n’est pas une surprise pour lui qu’il n’ait pas ses mots avant ses 17 ans. La plupart, comme son frère Erik, les ont plus jeune. Aux alentours de 12 à 15 ans. Mais, évidement, Wilhelm a un temps de retard. Il se réveille ce matin avec sa tête battant la chamade et son poignet palpitant. Ce dernier est endolorie et légèrement gonflé, comme s’il venait d’avoir un tatouage, ce qu’il venait, en quelque sorte, d’avoir. Puisque, c’est ici que ses mots ont décidé de se former. Directement sur son poignet droit. Un univers alternatif d’âme sœurs où les premiers mots que votre âme sœur vous adresse se forment sur votre corps avant que vous ne la rencontriez.

all of you, all of me Status: complete Rating: T Author: meglimeg Summary: Wille’s been staring at his phone for the better part of ten minutes, wondering how long it will take him to gather the courage to ring his mother. He knows she won’t be happy about the news, and as much as he really, truly doesn’t care about what she has to say about it, it’s still not a conversation he’s looking forward to.

He’s jolted back into the moment when his phone rings, and he looks down to see that Erik’s calling him, and he thinks, ah, okay. Here’s a test run he can do. 

Even if We're Not Meant to Be, I'm Yours Status: completed Rating: T Author: MarvellKya17 Summary: After damaging his family's reputation in a viral video, Wille is forced to go on a reality dating show as damage control. There, he meets Simon, who prompts him to question whether soulmates are real and whether it matters. 

You got a friend in me Status: completed Rating: T Author: NerdGirl07 Summary: They sit next to each other in silence for a while. Or, at least Rosh does. As much as he tries, Ayub can never be completely silent, and now is no exception. He’s humming quietly under his breath, a song Rosh can’t quite make out, but something upbeat and catchy and off key even under his breath, because unlike Simon, Ayub can’t carry a tune in a bucket. She thinks it might be Uptown funk- they’ve all been into Bruno Mars recently, and it is an awful earworm.

The Sound of Forever Status: incomplete Rating: E Author: paspeurpasseul Summary: A Soulmate AU where your soulmates first words spoken to you form on your body before you meet them.

I Swear I Don't Love The Drama, It Loves Me Status: complete Rating: T Author: online_campfire_tales Summary: After causing unfixable damage to his reputation, Wilhelm wants to melt away into Hillerska and never bring shame to his family again. His plan fails when he joins Hillerska's elite fight club and falls in love with his classmate.

Growing Pains Status: completed Rating: T Author: NerdGirl07 Summary: When Erik was ten his baby brother was born. He took one look at his brother’s chubby baby cheeks and promptly decided he’d love him until the end of time.

Wille was one when he said his first word. When he was two his contagious laugh never failed to make Erik smile. Wille was six when he had his first panic attack, nine when Erik left for university, and fourteen when he started public school.

He was sixteen when the sex tape leaked.

Through it all, Erik was there. 

red like the color flowing in our hearts Status: completed Rating: M Author: ASkyOfKai Summary: On his first day of school, Wilhelm came home and told her his string didn't lead to Felice. Kristina had sighed and patted his hair, saying there were still plenty of girls that could be his soulmate. There are a lot of noble European families after all, and plenty more upper-class ones. He'd meet her someday.

His soulmate's name is Simon.

Throw the Script Out the Window (let's start something new) Status: completed Rating: T Author: isnt_that_wizard Summary: In a world where Erik never died but the video still gets released, Wilhelm is doing the interview to address the video and the country's speculations about him and his sexuality. Or, a continuation of my first young royals story

'it's okay, my shoulder was made for your tears' Status: completed Rating: not rated Author: angelwilhelm Summary: No summary

[randominagines]

Hi!! I was wondering if I could request a dbf!bucky x Rogers!reader where they’re secretly dating and no one knows. Then Bucky is dusted (infinity war) and Y/N cries, which she has never done before as she thinks that it’s a sign of weakness. She fights with her Dad and the other avengers and when everyone comes back, and she sees Bucky, she jumps onto him and they kiss. Thanks ❤️

Thanks for the request!

Pairing: dbf!Bucky Barnes X Rogers!Fem!reader

Warning: angst, fluff

P.s. if you find any mistake please correct me, English is not my mother tongue and I want to improve. Reblog, if you can, it helps a lot, thank you💕

P.p.s. gifs belong to the creators.

Second chance

Flashback

This movie is absolutely heart breaking." Bucky said, his finger quickly rubbing his eye. Y/n softly smiled while caressing his cheek. "Baby, are you crying?" She asked and tenderly ran her fingers through his hair. He shrugged. "Well, how can you not being in tears right now?" He asked and pulled her closer, she chuckled. "Crying is a weakness." She simply said, her fingers playing with his dog tag. He looked at his girlfriend, his hand caressing her legs. "Crying is human, doll. You're a very strong woman and allowing yourself to feel emotions won't make you less strong." He explained and she shrugged. "I just can't fully let myself go." She said.

Bucky scanned her, his eyes travelling from her lips to her y/e/c eyes, while thinking about the fact that y/n was the most resolute person he knew. "It's okay, don't force yourself." He said and she chuckled. "Dad always says that too." She explained and Bucky shook his head. "Doll, I keep thinking about Steve: the fact that he doesn't know about us makes me feel guilty. We can't keep telling him that I'm training you." He said, small wrinkles appearing on his forehead while he was thinking about it. Y/n cupped his face and looked at him. "We'll tell him, I promise. He will understand." She said and pressed her lips on his, a soft moan escaping her lips when he pulled her closer and kissed her back. Bucky had a way to kiss her that made her go insane: he was passionate, deep, intense. He caressed her back while licking her lower lip, his tongue demanding access. She slightly pulled his hair while running her fingers through his locks and smiled on his lips. "I love you, Sargent Barnes." She whispered and he curved his lips into a tiny smile while they started lying down on the bed.

He couldn't believe he fell for his best friend's daughter. He didn't even think that he was worthy of love anymore, that he could simply open his heart, but y/n was something else: she slowly walked into his life, her delicate way to understand him and to always respect his timing made him slowly realize that it was possible for him to love someone, to be in a relationship. He still remembered the first time he looked at her and realized that she wasn't Steve's little girl anymore, she had become the woman he was in love with. He stared at her, the deepest love in his eyes.

He traced her lower lip with his thumb. "I love you too, doll, and I'm grateful to have you... but I think that it's more likely to see you crying than to see us telling Steve the truth." He joked before kissing her again, his vibranium hand moving her under his body while he was undressing her with the other.

Y/n thought about this exact moment when she first felt the strange sensation of a tear running down her cheek. She was on her knees, hands still holding her gun while she looked at the ashes on the floor. Between the plants, on the green grass, those ashes were the only thing left of her boyfriend. She touched the tiny grains and started shaking. "Bucky..." She whispered, her voice barely audible. Steve kneeled down next to her and put a hand on her shoulder. "He's gone..." He whispers, as shocked as she was, but he couldn't know how deep was y/n's pain. She looked at her father and he gasped: he had never seen her once crying. He hugged her, not sure about what to say, and she was simply frozen, her eyes fixed on what was left of Bucky.

Later that day, when they finally came back to the facility, Steve saw her crying again. He walked to her and caressed the back of her head. "Hey, sweetheart, I'm here." He whispered and she looked at him, eyes filled with sadness. "Dad, I loved him." She said, her voice shaking.

It took a moment to Steve to actually process such an information, then he widened his eyes. "You loved him? You mean..." He hesitated, his eyebrows frowned while he connected the dots. "He was not training you." He whispered, his hand massaging his forehead. Y/n shake her head. "It actually started like this. He trained me this whole time, it's just that we fell in love in the process. I'm sorry I haven't told you, I was just scared to disappoint you and he--" Steve put a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, hey, slow down, sweetheart. I don't want you to feel like this, I can only imagine what kind of pain you're going through, it's okay. You should have told me, but I can't be angry at you. Love isn't always easy and I've seen it myself, I'm here if you need me." He concluded, his words weighted with such a delicacy while he thought about Peggy. Y/n kept crying, her arms crossing over his shoulders to hug her dad. She closed her eyes, thinking that she had just lost the love his life.

FIVE YEARS LATER

"Dad! Are you okay?!" Y/n shouted while running to him, her hands grabbing his face to look at him. He painfully nodded and looked at his daughter. "I am, I can still fight." He said and slowly stood up. Y/n looked at his shield and gasped: it was broken, the edge of it totally smashed. The girl looked at his father, then her eyes travelled to Thanos. He was standing there, his sword raised while his army was starting to get ready to fight. "We cannot give up." She whispered and painfully moaned, she had a deep cut in her hip but still, she wasn't going to stop fighting. Steve proudly looked at her. "We are going to die." He said, mostly to prepare her to the worst case scenario. She nodded, eyes fixed on Thanos. "At least we'll do it with honour." She whispered and positioned her feet, ready to start and ready to kill the responsible of Bucky's death.

In that precise moment, Steve heard something coming from his earpiece. "On your left" a voice firmly said. Steve slowly turned, his broken shield shining in the light of an opening portal. Y/n widened her eyes when she saw T'Challa, Shuri and Okoye coming out of it.

Slowly, one by one, the blipped Avengers started to come out from the portals, their footsteps noise filling the air. Y/n looked around, her heart beating faster than ever, and then he finally spotted him: Bucky was walking out of a portal, a gun in his hands, his physical appearance exactly the same as she remembered, but his eyes completely different. He looked around, scanning every single person untill he finally laid his eyes on her: he widened them, a soft gasp escaping his lips. "Doll..." He whispered and lowered his gun before definitely letting it fall.

She automatically started running to him, her eyes filling with tears, she forgot about her hip. "Bucky!" She shouted and threw her arms across his shoulders. He wrapped his around her torso, his face hidden in the crook of her neck and his nose filling with her familiar scent. While the whole world around them kept moving, they were both frozen in that moment.

Y/n looked at him, her hands cupping his face. "You're here, you're here..." She whispered, voice shaking and tears running down her cheeks. He parted his mouth. "My love, you're crying..." He said while his finger wiped away her tear before caressing her cheek. She smiled, heart exploding with happiness. "I missed you so much, I love you." She said and rested her forehead against his, he held his breath. "I love you too, doll." He said.

In that moment, Steve's voice made them both turn. "Avengers, assemble." He shouted and everyone started running. Bucky and y/n exchanged a look of complicity before taking their weapons. "Let's kill those bastards." She said and he smirked, his gun clicking. "That's my girl."

THE FOLLOWING DAY

Y/n was sitting on the bed, in the room of the hotel she booked to spend the night, and she looked down at her legs: she loved wearing black, but that day she wished it wasn't required. She took a deep breath, ready to attend Tony's funeral, the she heard knocking at her door. She quickly walked to the door and opened it. "Doll." Bucky's arms immediately wrapped around her, his familiar touch immediately making her feel better. She took a deep breath. "Have you been helping dad and Thor keeping the city safe? I heard that the reappearing of the people who were snapped created quite a mess." She asked and he nodded while steeping into her room. "We just finished, now Fury sent a squad to replaced us," He explained and caressed her hip. "How are you?" He thoughtfully asked and she shrugged. "I stitched myself." She said and he nodded, his fingers gently sliding under her shirt to check on her wound: it was perfectly medicated.

His eyes hesitated, he hadn't seen her in years but it actually felt like a second. His sight travelled to hers. "You've changed your hair." He whispered and brushed a lock of her hair behind her ear. She slightly smiled. "It's been five years, I've grown." She said and he nodded, feeling his heart skipping a beat at the thought of how much he missed. "You still are the most beautiful women I've ever seen." He said, his voice a whisper and his finger tracing her cheekbone. She tilted her head. "A lot of things changed, but the only certainty I still have, is that I love you and I've never once lost hope to meet you again." She said, her eyes watery and her hands tenderly caressing his cheeks.

Bucky looked at her, noticed that she really had grown up: she looked so adult, with new responsibilities, more experience, but also so much more pain, sculpted in her features and in her eyes. He was so in love with her he couldn't even imagine what would he had done five years without her. "I'm sorry I left you, doll," he looked down, at his own hands. "The thought of how much you suffered makes me--" he tried to say but she shook her head. "Baby, look at me," she asked and he slowly raised his sight, eyes filled with agony.

"You have nothing to apologize for, this wasn't your choice. The thought of seeing you again or at least doing something good in this world made me grow up, I became wiser, more pondering, stronger. I'm grateful to have you back and I intend to enjoy every single moment with you, the love of my life," she said, her arms now crossing over his shoulders. "Plus, our age gap is smaller now. I'm five years older." She joked. Bucky finally relaxed under her touch, the corners of his lips curving into a smile. "You are all right, doll. I talked to Steve, by the way." He said and y/n widened her eyes. "What did you tell him?" She asked and he shrugged. "He obviously already knew, but I told him that I'm sorry, I should have told him years ago. He asked me to take care of you and I told him that you mean the world to me, I will always keep you safe, even if you know how to take care of yourself." He said and put his hands on her waist, his touch giving her goosebumps. She smiled. "I missed being in your arms. Please, never leave me again." She said, her fragilities showing in her tears. He smiled, realising how much she had been maturing, to the point that she was now able to embrace her vulnerability. He pulled her closer. "Never, doll." He whispered before pressing his lips on hers.

[windywooshes]

Douma x (F)Reader

~*:beloved short cut guide:*~

(Y/N): Name

(L/N): Last name

(H/C): Hair color [i.e. brunette, blonde, etc ]

(E/C): Eye color

--------------------------------------------------------

A rainbow. That was the first thought which crossed her mind when she peeked between the bodies of her parents and the two cult leaders.

Behind the excited chattering, was a boy, no older her age. He had silver hair and the most sparkly eyes the little girl ever saw in her young life. The boy himself was skimming the room, borred, until he locked eyes with the curious child. (Y/N) quickly hid behind her mother's legs with a slight blush covering her cheeks, when he smiled warmly over to her, waving his tiny hand as a gesture of welcome.

It seemed that the older female felt the curiousity of the (H/C) which was circling around her like a swarm of beez. Buzzing and summing. What would his name be ? Is he another kid whose parents joined ? Will he be her friend ?

Most questions were answered when she and her parents were led into the room. She was confused as to why her mother and father were bowing down deeply infront of the child. Tearing up, she was forced down for a bow as well. Her head colliding with the hard tatami matt, creating a blue spot the next day, probably. The boy's smile didn't vanish.

„Welcome to the cult of entire happiness~. May your stay bring joy and peace into your life. You may raise your head now.“

„Oh thank you, our beloved leader.“

(Y/N) raised both of her eyebrows in confusion. Leader ? Is she a leader as well ? There is no significant difference between the boy and her, after all. If this boy could bring happiness to her parents...would she be able to as well ?

She silently gasped. The girl would definitely make sure to ask the silverette how to do that. Life seemed to be very gloomy, whenever she was home alone with her elders. Loud arguments and ugly fights painted the nights in a muted color. How she longed for those old colorful days, where her father would embrace her mother tightly. Or the summer days where she was helping her mother with the laundry, laughing and enjoying the surring melody of the cicadas.

When the family exited the ceremony room, they were invited for tea to discuss the other details together. (Y/N) wouldn't stop thinking about the boy. Thanks to the mother of the leader, she was allowed to skim through the palace by her own. You wouldn't need so say that twice to her, as she immediately dashed her way out of the room.

To her disadvantage, the mansion felt like a labyrinth. Crossing many different rooms and areas but not the one she wished for. She sinked down on the wooden floor. Sniffles already escaping her nose.

(Y/N) was lost. But before she could even break out into tears, she felt a presence behind her. Turning around, she found the little boy from before. Her face lighted up on the spot as she made her way up to her legs again.

„Are you okay ? Where are your parents ?“

His voice sounded so soft, yet the words felt hollow. On a closer look, she noticed the colorful orbs to be dull. Without any emotion or life in them. How come such beautiful eyes, looked so cold ?

Douma shifted his head to the side. Was the girl deaf ? Could she maybe not speak ? Before he could say anything, he felt a tug on his hand as the girl suddenly grabbed it with both of her own. She was piercing holes into him. That was something he never had happen to him before. What a bold child, she was.

„Please teach me how I can give Mama and Papa happiness !“

Her voice sounded determined. Almost as if she blurted out a promise, she swore to fullfill and he was the only key which would lead to it.

Douma's eyes furrowed upwards. How should he confess to her that happiness is a fraud ? That there is no way to bring or become happy ? That it was all just a ghost of sensation inside someone's mind ? He placed his free hand ontop of one of hers, smiling again.

„I believe that you should find it yourself, as I am only a messenger between god and the humans.“

He couldn't bring himself to tell her the truth he believed in. She seemed to be too pure and innocent to be painted in muddy hues by this harsh reality. The mansion was a place of peace. Of illusions. It was not his job to destroy them. Especially for one of hid future followers.

He watched her eyes drifting off from his own, onto the floor. Her eyebrows knitted together. For a moment Douma expected her to be disappointed but he was met with an excited expression instead. Her lips forming into a toothy grin.

„Right ! I think I can do it even without god's help !“

He was caught off guard for a moment. All the time he was seated on the throne, he only saw people bowing down to him. Praying. Sending messages to god for help, instead of searching for solutions for their problems on their own. Suddenly his heartbeat quickened.

„Oh ! I'm (L/N) (Y/N) ! But please just call me (Y/N) ! We should play a lot when you can~“

Her smile was as bright as the sun. Genuine warmth which he hasn't felt in a while.

„Please call me Douma. It's a pleasure to meet a new follower~“

Before the two of them could chat any further, a female voice could be heard, calling out the name of the (H/C).

„I think you need to leave already. I hope we will meet again.“

With that, Douma disappeared inside the room next to them. Just in time before (Y/N)'s mother arrived to take her daughter to the exit of the mansion.

Maybe, they could become friends after all.

Months passed with her family visiting the cult on a regular basis once a week. Sadly the girl couldn't make much progress with their friendship since Douma was only seen durring the ceremonies or private prayer appointments. It was a very frustrating visit every week but the girl told herself to keep trying.

She found a chance to approach him after hearing about the latest tragedy. Douma's father was found murdered by his wife while she herself took her own life by poisoning herself.

(Y/N) felt sad for the young boy. How would he live without his parents ? How can he live day by day, knowing about such a horrible event in his own home ? After all it seemed to happen inside of his ceremony room too.

She carefully peeked inside of the four walls, hoping not to interrupt him in one of his cleansing ceremonies. He was lying on his pillow, eyes closed. It seemed as if he was fast asleep from all the stress and preasure. Suprisingly, the room didn't contain any sight or smell of the blood bath.

Carefully the (H/C) girl, sneaked in her way infront of the pillow and starred down at the child with her big (E/C) orbs. It didn't take long for Douma to open his own, to gaze right back at the owner of the second pair.

„Do you wish for an audience ? I can squeeze in some extra time for you.“ he smiled brightly but it felt so hollow and cold as always.

Inching her way closer to the male, she carefully glanced around the room, making sure that no adults were close who could scold her for her actions.

The said boy just looked at her, confused by her behaviour but not questioning it any further until he felt small arms wrap around his body and the warmth against him. The colorful orbs blinked, not sure what to do or say in such a situation. It felt warm. It felt save. His chest tightened for a bit, heart beating louder. Something was dwelling up inside of him but he couldn't really catch this intruder. It was unknown for him. It felt just like the first interaction they shared.

Hearing sniffles, his bushy eyebrows arched up. Was she crying on his behalf ? Because of the latest events ? Douma couldn't even understand why she would make herself sad because of something what happened to him. It shouldn't matter to her. It was his life, his tragedy to bear, not hers.

„I'll make sure to come every day and play with you ! Pinky promise !“

Holding out her tiny finger infront of him, after leaving the hug, (Y/N) had a stern yet soft look on her face. The boy shouldn't feel lonely all by himself. She'll make sure to bring some fun and adventure into his life ! Only because he brings happiness doesn't mean that he can't have some of it as well, right ?

Douma on the other hand was just perplexed and totally unsure as to what to do now. He just ended up copying her and held out his own pinky infront of her. As quick as he could blink, she had both of their fingers wrapped up together and gave it one nice shake before letting go. Giving him a bright toothy smile, before waving her hand to say goodbye.

„I'll be back tomorrow !“

With that, the silver haired male was left alone in the room, still holding his pinky up, confused and unsure as to what just happened.

And as tomorrow came, (Y/N) dashed along with it. Somehow both kids managed to sneak out of the stuffy ceremony room into the big garden which was located in the middle of the temple. With paper squares in one hand and entwined fingers in the other, the (H/C) made her way over to the pond with the boy.

„(L/N)-san...I believe we are not allowed to trespass into the garden.“

Actually, Douma couldn't care less about the rules as he was the center of attention in the cult but he just tried to find a way to get back inside, since the bright sun burnt down on them, as it was already the middle of summer.

„Aw...you are no fun, Douma-chan !“ she puffed her cheeks out with her eyebrows knitted together but eased up once she handed him some square papers.

Seating herself on the stoned pavement, she started to fold and bend one of the thin sheets and managed to create a decent looking lotus flower.

„Let's decorate the pond a bit. It looks so bland and the koi seem to like the flowers too !“

Glancing into the reflecting water, he watched as two kois swam underneath the freshly folded lotus, trying to hide from the shining orb in the sky by swimming in the shadow of the paper figure.

Douma looked over to the side, catching the eyes of the girl and smiled a bit. He gently placed his hat down from his head and sat himself close to his companion. Watching her tiny hands gliding over the paper with each new fold. Copying her movements calmly, as if he had done this millions of times before. The girl glimpered her eyes in amazement.

„Woah ! It looks so pretty ! I'm sure the fishes will be happy about it !“

Her smile was just as bright as the afternoon sun, watching happily when he placed the flower gently into the water with a smile gracing his own lips.

Douma caught himself gazing at (Y/N) with his own amazement and curiosity. His chest was fluttering again but he didn't seem to mind it as much as yesterday. He just took her hand in his tiny one and smiled brightly.

„Let's make this pond beautiful together !“

The (H/C)'s face lighted up with his promise. Nodding her head in excitement, she squeezed his hand gently before continuing to fold new flowers to place into the liquid.

Years passed and the garden grew, along with the two kids. The new flora and fauna decorating the center of the mansion proudly.

Both , (Y/N) and Douma continued to care for it and the koi. Meeting up every day just for a bit tranquillity from the cult. The silverette was dreading for the small amount of time he could spend with the girl. After all those years, he grew to enjoy her company and her refreshing nature. Just like a fresh cube of ice durring a hot summer day, she was cooling him off and bringing him the relaxation he secretly hoped for since his early childhood days.

Douma was currently seated on the wooden floor which connected the garden and the house with each other. Gracefully folding a lotus flower from a peachy pink colored origami paper. Even though they planted real lotus in the pond, he still found himself crafting them whenever he was waiting for the (H/C).

Quick taps on the floor brought him out of his daydreaming. He knew exactly who they belonged to as he heard the same rythm for such a long period already. A smile waved upon his face when he caught the (E/Y) orbs and the slightly messy (H/C) locks of (Y/N).

„I told you that you don't need to run~ you might slip and hurt yourself as you did that time...“

(Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows together, cheeks tinting pink. That time, she was running through the hallways to find the devil himself. Well, the females search was successful. She managed to slip and bump right into him, sending them both onto the hard wooden floor, earning an earful afterwards from the cult followers who witnessed the whole fiasco.

„I've been more careful since then though !“

The male laughed at her reaction. It was always interesting to watch her flustered face and her movements along with it. Patting the spot next to him, he invited her over to enjoy the scenery of the garden and the cold breeze of the wind. She quickly sat down, back facing him as he took out a comb from one of his pockets.

It became a daily ritual for him to brush her hair after she arrived, since it always looked all over the place from her running. A time where both of them could have their peace from the loud city or from the other members. A small moment of recharging.

(Y/N) started to humm a small melody while she patiently sat besides the cult leader, while the man himself couldn't help but smile slightly. Admiring the soft touch of her hair against his fingers. He carefully inched closer to her neck and gave it a quick kiss, before leaning back again once he heard her shriek of surprise. Holding up his hands in defence, he couldn't hold back his chuckles at the entertaining ruckus she gives him. He earned some gentle smacks with the fan which the girl brought along with her. Cheeks puffed out and brught red.

Once she stopped she sighed and put her hands down on her lap, looking at the leaves which were swaying with the light wind. Douma followed her gaze but caught himself stealing some looks at the female next to him intead. Wrapping an arm around her shoulder, he pulled her against his chest. Surprisingly enough, he was not poked and shoved back. Feeling his company ease up against him.

.

.

.

„You should move into the mansion.“

„Huh ?“

„You wouldn't need to run here. We could enjoy the view even at night! It looks beautiful with the fireflies. I could comb your hair everyday. We could fold other paper figures~“

„You know that I can't do that...because-„

„Because of your sick mother, I know...“

Douma sighed and rubbed his temple. For a while now, you have been taking care of your ill mother since your father passed away. He knew your hardships and saw your bruised hands and legs from carrying the heavy vegetables everyday to sell them on the market. Just so you could earn some more yen to get both of you through life. And as disgusting and inhumane it sounded, he was wishing for your mother to finally pass away and free you from your slavery. He could offer you more. Anything you would wish for, it would be there in mere seconds. Yet you declined all of his offers up until now. Refusing to live life easy.

It made him frustrated but he respected your decision. Honestly, he couldn't care less as to what you make out of your life...right ? It should be like that but he still seems to grow annoyed by the constant rejection. Don't humans usually go for the easiest way ? Why wouldn't you do the same. Why were you so stubborn. A contrast to his usual followers.

„As you wish, my lotus~“

She sighed before poking him in the side, earning no reaction whatsoever.

„Here, I made this fan for you since you seem to hate the heat so much.“

Pulling away from the embrace, (Y/N) pulled out a beautiful golden fan.

„For our wonder and blessing, Douma-sama~“ copying one of the desperate cult members voice, she held out the item and bowed down deeply.

Douma chuckled and gently picked up the fan, answering in a mocking royal voice.

„I am grateful for your generous offering, my lost lamb. May you find happiness~ you may raise your head now.“

Placing a hand ontop of her head, he could feel the shaking of her body which came from the laughter she tried to hold back.

The wind chimes ringed with the gentle breeze which was traveling through the garden and another day ended with (Y/N) heading back home.

The next day, Douma was surprised to be alone in the garden. As well as the following. And the other.

2 weeks passed and he hasn't heard anything of (Y/N). But when he did, it was not a pretty sight for him to see. Her hands and cheek were swollen with bruises, she was dirty, her once beautiful (H/C) locks looked like a total mess.

Apparently his wish became true.

After (Y/N) arrived at home that night, she was met with the terrible fate of discovering her mother brutally murdered. It was a horrific sight. To her dismay, she met face to face with the attacker and almost got killed herself. Almost. If it wouldn't have been to the swordsman who beheaded the monster inches away from of her face.

The shock from losing her last family member and for almost having her life pulled away from her grasp, let her fall into sadness and fear. She couldn't move or eat for days. This also meant that she couldn't pay for her necessities in time, bringin the owner of the fields and house, home to her and beating her for the refusal of work over the time span. Taking away all left over possessions she was left with. Without a roof over her head or a job to feed her, she didn't know where to go or what to do. Once she snapped out of her trance, she found herself infront of the gates of the cult mansion and broke down into tears when she was met with the face of Douma.

The members helped her clean up and cutting her hair. Sadly it was so messed and clogged up that brushing wouldn't help. Which ended up with her hair becoming a bon cut. The bruises were bandaged and taken care of, in hopes that they won't leave permanent marks on her skin.

Once night arrived, (Y/N) made her way silently to the garden. Plopping down on the spot she usually sat on with the cult leader. Gazing at the small glowing dots which danced through the petals and leaves.

„It really does look beautiful...“ she whispered, not sensing the presence of Douma behind her.

He sat down next to her and looked at her face. It felt empty. Her sparkling eyes completely dull. Her voice drained of joy. Raising up his hand to touch her head, the impact of his touch resulted in a flinch and the girl backing away from him a bit.

„A-ah, I apologize...I was in thoughts...“

She tried to crank up a smile but it looked horrible. It felt as if everything bright and beautiful was taken away from him the second he saw her today. Attempting to show some kind of comfort he wrapped his arms around her smaller frame. Careful not to put pressure on the wounds and blue spots on her flesh.

„You will be well here...I will give you anything you want or need. You won't face any more fear. You will be safe. I will make sure of it.“

He felt her shaking, not from laughter this time though. Her sobs filling the silence of the safe haven they built up together. A beautiful summer night, yet it was so ugly.

The following weeks, Douma tried to fulfill any wish the female had. He would make his followers bring her the sweetest treats, the most beautiful kimono to wear, bringing her a fresh bouquet of flowers to decorate her room. To his frustration, nothing seemed to bring the smile back he was always curious about. The spark which brought him calm. Nothing of it surfaced, remaining shut inside of the shell which created them.

His actions seemed to have brought the dismay of his followers as well. Many females and males complained about his bias towards the (H/C) girl. He brushed them off, assuring them that he was just trying his best to recreate the happiness which the girl lost. But it didn't seem to work. Soon enough, certain members started to push her around, ignoring her or talking behind her back. Spreading rumours and untasteful remarks.

It seemed that it affected the male more than her as she was only sitting outside the garden, watching the scenery with an empty stare.

As days went on, (Y/N) seemed to become ill. Becoming weaker and weaker with every sunrise which followed. Soon, she was not being found outside but laying inside her room with the shoji door open, to bring some fresh summer wind into the square which caged her in.

The silverette made sure to visit her with each day. Bringing her the nutrients she needed along with the medicine which was prepared by his cult members.

„Douma...I'm grateful for the time we spent. Even though my life was not painted in colors...but whenever I saw you and spent time in the garden, it was filled up with them and brought me peace.“

Before he could respond, he was cut off by the female once again.

„I am aware that you cannot feel as I do. Or see as I do. Hate and greed, happiness and love. Those are emotions you do not possess. Maybe you never did. But let me confess you my love, at least now before I pass...“

Her voice was raspy and very quiet. If he didn't lean in closer to her, he would have barely caught what she tried to tell him.

(Y/N) proped herself up shakily, Douma helping her up as good as he could since he was clearly unsure how he could aid her. Once she somewhat sat up, she leaned against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. She was aware of his lack of emotions. Even from the early childhood days, yet she still grew to love him. No matter how empty and cold he was.

Pressing her soft lips against his cheek, she gave him a small peck before succumbing back into his arms.

Her last breaths were decorated with a genuine last smile she gifted the male, on his way through life without her. A talisman.

He burried her in the garden, next to the pond. Where she would remain one of his beloved lotus flowers. She was the reason why he grew to like them. And after the harsh winter and the visit of Kibutsuji, they were the only flowers which survived and stayed in the garden with him through all these years. The first and last memory of his humanity for a good while.

So fleeting. Like a rainbow after a summer rain.

——————

This was one of the two requests I received ! The next one will be another Zenitsu x Reader :) thank you for the love !

[etlunainmorte]

~ 1st May, 1884 ~

Sous le dome epais ou le blanc jasmin,

A la rose s'assemble,

Sur la rive en fleurs riant au matin,

Doucement glissons De son flot charmant,

Suivons le courant fuyant,

Dans l'onde fremissante,

D'une main nonchalante,

Viens, gagnons le bord,

Ou la source dort et,

L'oiseau, l'oiseau chante.

So, this was the song that everyone was talking about. The Flower Duet from Lakme. It does sound enchanting. It calmed your mind and filled your head with happy thoughts. And everyone seemed to think so, as well. You could clearly see the elated expressions on their faces from one of the upper boxes you and your companions were watching the play from. Act One in and you're fully taken in! The grandeur, the bright lights, and the flowers! Yes, the flowers! Everything was so enchantingly beautiful,...

Apparently, focusing hard on Lakme was the only thing you could do that one evening in May. Why?

You carefully peeled your (E/C) eyes off the flowery stage without putting down your Galilean binoculars and gave a sideways glance to the man sitting right next to you on your left. And, surely, for the third time that evening, you caught the man gazing at you, his cold eyes seemingly giving your senses the opposite effect and making your head spin.

You suppressed your little cough, shrugged your shoulders a bit, and pretended to sit up straight as you focused your sight back to the stage. And still, you could feel the man's gaze boring into you.

There was,... something truly different about the Duke and you noticed it the moment he arrived from London to visit you here in Paris. It's as if an intimidating kind of aura surrounded him with the way he carried himself. You swore you even felt smaller than ever before when you stood next to him to greet him. Or maybe it was just your imagination playing tricks on you? After all, you haven't seen the man in ten years. You remembered him telling you that he had some urgent matters to attend to with regards to the land ( far too massive ) and the titles ( far too great ) that his father has left him ( his younger brother inherited the lesser title of Earl from their late uncle, as customary ) and that he needed to go to London for them. 

Of course, your friendship thrived despite the long distance. The two of you continued to exchange letters, lengthy, in fact, about your daily lives, your etiquette lessons, his thriving businesses, your passion in the arts, the expansion of his father's land, your fondness of your family's little garden, and his hobby in music. And in these letters, he promised to bring you to London one day, to see his humble home, to attend both the Season and the Little Season with him, to bask in the rustic countryside, and to wander about the garden he claimed he has built just for you.

Oh, how your heart fluttered when you read those words from the man! And from that point onward, you waited for the day of his return. Everyday, you hoped to see him in your doorstep, smiling at you and sweetly calling your name,...

And after ten long years of waiting, he has finally arrived! But, there was something truly different about him. It seemed that London has morphed him into a different kind of person.

Gone was the boy who always skipped his Latin lessons just to play pirates with you. Gone was the little trouble maker who often has to dress up like his younger twin to escape his duties as the eldest son. Gone was the little man who always read William Blake's poems for you.

For, standing before you that one sunny morning, was none other than the man, himself. The intimidating, the tall one,...

... The Duke of Red Grave, himself.

Vergil Sparda.

As your sight jumped back and forth from Lakme to Millika, your mind went over everything that occurred the moment Vergil returned. During the last fortnight of his stay, he has graciously sent you gifts, taken you to Balls, has sent you flowers every morning, and has sent you poetry every evening.

However, despite all this attention you were receiving from him, you could not help but wonder why he still felt somehow absent. Yes, he has given you gifts. Yes, he has sent you letters. Yes, he has engaged with you but, somehow, it felt as if the Vergil you have known has disappeared. It's as if, suddenly, there was this man who barely actually spent time with you. To actually talk with you, to laugh with you, to exchange stories like how you used to. Simply put, he was always very busy. And now he seemed,... cold. Distant.

The Vergil you came to know,... was gone. That even though he was around, you felt empty.

You were still thinking deeply about it when you came out of the Grecian house of the theatre arts that you barely noticed it when the man took your hand and led you towards his own lacquered carriage bearing his symbol. And when you finally came to your senses, you found yourself sitting comfortably across the long - legged Duke, feeling your bottom sink deliciously amidst the deep blue velvet cushions of his luxurious vehicle.

"Y - your Grace?" You mumbled in confusion as you looked into his unfathomable eyes. "Where are the others?"

The Duke didn't even smile. Instead, he gave you a curt nod and gestured at the window to his left. "Dante and his lady are on their way to Morrison's. It's,... getting quite late. I must keep my word to your father that I would bring you home as early as I could."

"Oh."

Vergil didn't say anything else. Instead, he looked away from you and gazed at the streets of Paris outside the window as the carriage started to move.

As if those same, stoic eyes didn't stare at you for the whole duration of the play.

The thirty - minute ride back home was spent as unimaginably quiet as possible. Not that either of you don't want to speak to the other, no. It just felt like starting a conversation somehow felt awkward between the two of you. The silence even went so far that you could already feel your neck aching with the way you're forcefully focusing on the window to your left.

And, just then, when the carriage finally entered your family's estate, you heard the man clear his throat, making you turn towards him.

"Did you enjoy the play, my lady?" He asked all of a sudden.

Surprised at the question, you answered, "Why, yes! Yes, of course, Your Grace."

Vergil cleared his throat once more as he looked back outside. "Good."

When the Duke's vehicle came to a halt just in front of your house, the man swiftly opened the door, went outside, and opened the door for you. He took your hand and gently helped you step out of the carriage. By this time, the household has already settled down for the evening, with only the Head Butler left awake to open the door for you.

Then, as you were expecting him to lead you straight to the door, he turned to the right, forcing you to quicken your pace due to his wide strides.

Your dainty hand still on the crook of his left arm and the other lifting your long, (F/C) chiffon skirt to prevent yourself from tripping, you looked up at the man and saw,... something strange in his eyes.

Strange, and yet,...

... it felt really familiar, somehow. And exciting.

"Your Grace? I - is there something wrong?"

The man's eyes widened. He looked down at you and gave you a slightly awkward smile.

"Nothing! Nothing, dearest."

"Where are we - ?"

"Do you still remember? I used to escape my Latin tutor to spend time with you on your little garden."

Wha - ? "Y - your Grace?"

"Then we pretended we were pirates. I let you be the Captain for one day and we played and played, until the sun went down and my mother came looking for me."

"I,... ah,... well, yes! Of course. How could I forget?"

"Then, father gave me an earful. And Dante was so jealous when he found out I spent the whole day with you! I remember he sulked all day and didn't talk to me for a week. Did you know he has such a huge crush on you back then?"

You gave out a little laugh at the reminder. "Yes, I remember that huge crush but, I didn't know he ignored you like that for a week!"

Vergil chuckled. What's,... going on? "Then, when I heard you were sick, I borrowed Dante's clothes and knocked on your window."

"Yes, and nobody noticed it was you and not your brother. But, I did."

"My lady, how did you recognize me again?"

"You were carrying around your book of poems. Dante would never do that."

"Why, yes. Indeed, you are right." The man nodded.

"And I let you in because I was scared that someone would see you outside my window." You added. "It was,... such a huge breach of etiquette. Inviting a boy inside a girl’s room."

"It was such an experience."

"Yes. And it was,... actually quite nice. Being read poetry to you when you're sick."

"And I did that a couple of times. Even when you're not sick. The Garden Of Love was your most absolute favorite.”

“Why, yes, it still is.”

“Hmm.”

"You were such a naughty boy, Your Grace."

Vergil's eyes lit up, and when he looked at you, despite his facial features staying a little bit stoic and awkward, you felt something really warm within them.

Could it be,... ?

But, no. You decided to not let your hopes up.

Then again, the way he talked to you just now. It's as if the old Vergil you knew slipped through the very small kink of his intimidating armor and said hello to you once more.

It's as if somehow, deep within the shell of this cold man, lie still the soul of an old friend that you spent most of your childhood with.

And the way he looked at you,...

... it felt as if this old Vergil really wanted to be set free.

"Vergil."

Huh? "Your Grace?"

"I'm just Vergil." The man quietly said when you two finally arrived at the garden. "Please, call me Vergil." He spoke, not taking his eyes off you as he led you towards that old stone bench.

"Isn't it wrong to call you just by your name?" You asked him, the sweet scent of the white roses before you drifting to your nostrils.

The man raised an eyebrow. "Is it?"

"Yes,..." You answered uncertainly, helplessly watching as the man settled next to you and took both of your hands.

"Not in my book, my dearest." He said, raising both of your hands and giving each one a chaste peck.

Just now,...

Did you feel your heart skip a beat just now?

The way he's gazing at you, his eyes not leaving yours. The way he held your hands, his own, big ones gently rubbing them. The way he sat next to you, his closeness giving you more warmth than you could handle on a summer evening,...

What,... is going on?!

"Your Grace - "

"Vergil."

"Vergil." You repeated. "Is there something wrong? Something you wanted to say?"

"Is it wrong to stay like this for a while?"

God! This is getting really uncomfortable,... "W - what I mean is - "

"Come with me to London, (Y/N)."

All of a sudden, your tongue decided not to cooperate with you. Yes, you were excited when the man promised you in those long letters that he would bring you to London one day.

But, now that he's asking you, why did it feel so,... different?

"I'm sorry but - "

"So, you will not go with me?"

"I will! I mean,..."

"Yes, (Y/N)?" The Duke asked, not a hint of amusement in his tone. "I told you in my letters. I promised to take you there with me. You said, yes. And, here I' am, fulfilling that promise to you. So, I will ask once more: will you go to London with me?"

You felt your heart doing flips, and you even had an urge to pry your trembling hands from him but, his grasp was just too tight.

"Is it just - ?" You nervously asked, fearing you might be wrong in your assumption. "Just the two of us?"

"Yes."

Oh, my God,... "T - then, I should tell my parents that - "

"Let me make this clear for the both of us." The man interrupted you. "Marry me, (Y/N)."

Were your ears deceiving you,... ? Just now, did he just ask you,... ? "Y - yes? I mean - !"

"What is it? What's the matter, my dearest?" Vergil asked, closing the gap between the two of you and leaving you no choice but to face him head on. "I couldn't help it. I have loved you ever since I've known you. And my feelings for you only became deeper when I went to London. When I was separated from you. You don’t have a single idea how much I’ve dreamed of this very moment. I want to be with you. Always.”

"Your Grace, I - "

Were your senses deceiving you? Or did he just press his incredibly soft lips against yours? Did your eyeballs just roll up your eyelids at the incredible sensation of his mouth moving gently and yet firmly against yours, urging you to reciprocate? Did that same mouth, which rarely blessed anyone with a smile, render you totally useless right before him? Did those same hands, that held yours a moment ago, and which started to move up and down your back in a soothing rhythm, hypnotize you? Did that deep voice of his, which softly moaned your name, just make you forget everything else as you finally held onto him for dear life? Did the way he uttered those three words finally move you to the point of surrender?

You never knew, and you never wished to find out. For there was only one thing in your mind at that moment,...

You awfully missed this man. This fiercely loving, unbelievably caring, and absolutely adoring man, who was mysteriously hiding behind his cold, cynic, and intimidating shell for some reason you wish to find out. You missed him too much for your own good.

And now that he's holding you, and loving you, and caressing you this way, you wished this sweet moment would last longer. You fervently wished for this contact to not end. Your heart longed for this man to stay with you forevermore.

However, as the popular belief went, all good things must come to an end, for just when the rhythm of his caresses started to change, he decided to stop. And this earned him a little, almost unnoticeable whine from you.

The corner of the man's lips went up in an unmistakable smirk, and just when you felt the heat creep up to your ears, he tipped your chin up to make you look straight into his darkened eyes and said, "I'll take that as a yes."

Once again, your own words failed you as you tried to let out a comprehensible argument. After what happened, how could anyone just say no to this handsome devil, anyway?!

"And now, I must make my preparations." The man said as he gave you a chaste peck on the forehead. "I will go back to London this instant."

"Wait! I thought you said - ?"

"I know." The man interrupted as he cupped your cheeks. "And I will be back before you even know it. As a matter of fact, you will never notice me coming towards you."

You helplessly shook your head as laid your hands on his, feeling the joy and mirth go back to your system after such a long time of this man's absence. "That's so Vergil of you, I guess. You creeping up on me and surprising me like that."

"For your information, my dearest, I don't creep." The man answered, clearly frowning at what you just labeled him as, but still not letting you go. "You should leave the creeping up to Dante, for I would only sweep you off your feet. Ouch! That hurt!"

And how could you not pinch him?! How could any stoic man such as him stay calm and serious and collected as he tell jokes?! It was so,... Vergil of him!

Oh, God! How you missed this side of him!

"You're so unfair, Vergil." You told him as you shamelessly wrapped your arms around his neck. "Leaving me for ten years, then going back just to propose to me out of the blue like that? You know you could've done that before going to London in the first place, and I would say yes. I would always say yes to you, Vergil."

"Forgive this fool for not doing it earlier, then." He answered as he held you, wrapping you in his embrace and pressing your body closer to his.

You hummed in satisfaction as you basked in his embrace. Burying your face in his fragrant shirt, you said, "You're so unfair. And mesmerizing."

"Well! We'll see about that."

"About what?" You asked as you looked up at him. "About you being unfair, or you being mesmerizing?"

Vergil smirked and inched closer to your ear. And with a voice that sent your senses to oblivion, he whispered, "Both. But I'm afraid we'll both have to wait until our wedding night to find out."

Even before his meaning sank, the man swiftly stood up and offered you his hand. "It is really getting late. You must go to bed now, my dearest. I insist."

"And you, My Lord?" You asked in a playful voice, matching the same degree of mischief that he has a while ago.

Vergil gave out a theatrical sigh. A very rare sight, indeed. "I'm your Lord now?" He asked, his eyebrow raised skeptically once more. "Anyway, to answer your question, as I've said, I would immediately go back to London. Probably to wake up the whole household with the good news. And make my preparations."

The little walk back to your house was enjoyable but, the parting proved to be really difficult. The man bid you good night and sweet dreams, and you bade him farewell for now with a forlorn wave of the hand. You don't know how long you'd wait for him this time around, however, he has assured you that he would be back before you even know it. And you trusted him, for he never broke his promises.

Until then, you would eagerly wait for his return. But, right now, you must go to sleep,...

... and dream of this one evening in May,...

... when the man of your dreams, your childhood love, the man you adored and waited for for ten years,...

... has finally declared his love for you.

***

🌸 I hope you still remember this little prize of mine for you, @harlot-of-oblivion . Thank you so much for supporting my work! 🌸

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🌸🌸🌸

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[trans-snart]

So I couldn’t stop thinking about Joe & Nicky and Origin of Love, and that spiraled into a MIKA-specific playlist because that’s just the kind of gay I am. Enjoy!

It can be shuffled, of course, but the song order forms a narrative structure as well. Selected lyrics are under the cut for anyone interested!

Playlist title comes from the live performance of Lollipop where the lyrics were changed to "but now I'm 32 years old / and all that bullshit I was told / I lived my life and love was found / and love never let me down"

*I personally did not do any of the translating for the French or Italian, but please let me know if there’s an error that should be corrected! Click the titles for the full song translations!

Any Other World:

Take a bow, play the part of a lonely, lonely heart / Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in, to the world you thought you lived in

I tried to live alone / But lonely is so lonely, alone / So, human as I am / I had to give up my defenses

Overrated:

Words get broken, cut me open / Love confound me, kill me quickly / Breathe out, breathe in / Throw me living off the deep end while I’m sleeping / I'm a crazy fool, I'm a fool addicted / To the touch of you, to your poison kisses / What you got to lose? / What do you think this is?...

Offered up my wrist, and you thought you hit it / But your arrow missed, couldn’t kill me with it / All I asked of you was to free my pain / So you couldn’t do this to me again

Heroes:

It's your blood on me / And my blood on you / But to make you bleed / The only thing I wouldn't do...

We fight, we yearn / We never learn / And through it all / The hero falls

I wish there was a way / To give you a hand to hold / 'Cause you don't have to die in your glory / Die, to never grow old

Porcelain:

It's a small cry that is screaming inside / It's a paper cut that is bleeding me dry / Porcelain, it's the state that I'm in / Hold me carefully, just one breath could shatter me

'Cause you and I, were one of a kind, unbreakable / How was I supposed to find / Out that I'd crumble

I Went To Hell Last Night:

I went to hell last night / Followed you there, I was standing by your side / The saddest thing I've ever seen / Made me angrier than I've ever been / But in the darkest place, a saving grace / After all we've been through / Though it kills me to say this / There's a little bit of God in you…

And one day you will see / Part of you is part of me / There's a little bit of God in everything

L’amour Fait Ce Qu’il Veut:

Pour ce salaud [For this bastard] / Je fais le tour de la terre [I go all around the world] / Jusqu'au Congo [To Congo] / Je m'enfuis dans le désert du Sahara [I flee into the Sahara Desert] / Tout en haut du sommet de l'Himalaya [Way up high from the Himalayan peak] / Sur la lune, à Cuba [To the moon, to Cuba]

Mais l'amour fait ce qu'il veut, fait ce qu'il veut de moi [But love does what it wants, does what it wants with me] / Mais l'amour, baby blue, fait ce qu'il veut de nous [But love, baby blue, does what it wants with us]

I See You:

I'm sitting across from you / I'm dreaming of the things I'd do / I don't speak, you don't know me at all / For fear of what you might do / I say nothing but stare at you / And I'm dreaming, I'm tripping over you

Truth be told, my problems solved / You mean the world to me but you'll never know / You could be cruel to me / Why go risking the way / That I see you?...

I'm standing across from you / I've dreamt alone, now the dreams won't do

Talk About You:

Walk through the jungle that used to be my town / Everything's different, you've turned it upside down / It happened to me, totally unprepared / Just the beginning, but I'm not even scared / ‘Cause living like this is risking all that I know / And if it kills me, that's the way I want to go

Domani:

Cercherò una scusa per sentirmi fragile [I'll try to find an excuse to feel fragile] / Perché tu mi fai paura e non lo so nascondere [Because you scare me and I can't hide it] / Il cuore ha sempre ciò che vuole [The heart always has what it wants] / Ma io vorrei soltanto i graffi sulla schiena [But I just want the scratches on my back] / Nudi nel retrovisore [Naked in the rear-view mirror] / In macchina io e te con la radio accesa [You and me in the car with the radio on]...

Pensiamo troppo al domani [We think too much about tomorrow] / Ma oggi siamo qui e non ci troviamo più [But today we are here we no longer find ourselves] / Chissà cosa sarà domani [Who knows what tomorrow might bring] / Non vedo il panorama resti solo tu [I don't see the view, just you]

Feels Like Love:

Baby, look at us / Any fool could see / I was made for you / And you were made for me / Okay, tell me no / And we could play that game / Waste a lot of time, but still feel the same

We could walk away / And just like others would / Or we live our lives / Like we know we should / 'Cause it feels like / Yes, it feels like love...

This is how it is, after just one kiss / Do you really think I'm inventing this? / 'Cause it feels like love to me

Tiny Love:

I couldn't train a bunch of doves to spell your name / It's a 'don't-know-what-they're-missing' kind of love

Our kind of love, it gets better every day / Crazy colors in the grey, our love / Tiny love, it's a tiny love...

Oh, tiny love / So small that you can't find us / The world revolves around us / Oh, tiny love / This kind of love, it can't be no other way / One kind of love blows the other ones away

Step With Me:

Is this happening to me? / Have I lost all my defenses? / Should I wait around and see / What it's like to lose my senses? / Always looking for the chase / From the high ground to the ditches / But the chase I'll never miss / Now I know what happiness is...

Sun is shining up ahead / In 30 years we'll still be happy / Making movies in my head / Making Hollywood look tiny / Don't know why but all your words / Sound just like a melody / From the pieces that I've heard / I could build a symphony

Boum Boum Boum:

Pas la peine d'aller cavaler [An escapade isn't needed] / Y’a que ça qui m’fait voyager [This is what makes me travel] / Pas les cocotiers de Tulum [Not the coconut palms of Tulum] / Quand toi et moi on fait boum boum boum [When you and I are making boom boom boom]

Et tous les bourgeois du seizième [And all the sixteenth's bourgeois] / Se demandent pourquoi je t'aime [Wonder why I love you] / Pour le voir pas besoin d'un zoom [To see it, they don't need a zoom] / Quand toi et moi on fait boum boum boum [When you and I are making boom boom boom]

Sanremo:

If I could, I know where I'd be / In a little town in Italy / Close your eyes, come away with me / Tomorrow we will be / Sitting by the seaside / Drinking up the sunshine / You're here, so why don't we go / Dancing in Sanremo? / We could be there in a couple of hours / To the place with the yellow flowers / Somewhere only we know / Sunset in Sanremo

To feel like this / Is one in a million / A suspended moment / Can we seal it with a tender kiss?

Sound Of An Orchestra:

You don’t even know everything I hear / Every move, every note, every time you’re near / If I close my eyes, promise I can see / A hundred people playing and it’s just for me / I can hear it, I can hear it, I can hear it, I swear / All the music you’re provoking, filling up the air

Tiny Love (Reprise):

This tiny love, it might be small / But it's the greatest of them all / This tiny love would disappear / You can't forget that it was here / We are tiny to the world, but in our hearts / We are giants with our tiny, tiny love…

And if it all goes bad / And our love sets like the sun / I'd give up a hundred thousand loves / For just this one

Origin Of Love:

You are the sun and the light / You are the freedom I fight / God will do nothing to stop it / The origin is you / You’re the origin of love...

Like every word that you preach / Like every word that you teach / With every rule that you breach / You know the origin is you

From the air I breathe, to the love I need / Only thing I know, you're the origin of love / From the God above, to the one I love / Only thing that's true, the origin is you...

Your love is air, I breathe it in around me / Don't know it's there, but without it I'm drowning

Love, you're the origin of love / (thank God that you found me)

[dvlwthn]

“  we’re  one  with  the  sea  .  ”

Is that NOAH CENTINEO? No, that’s just ATLAS LAVEAU. They were born on 09/05/96 and are a MERMAID living in Northknot Town. They work as a SWIM INSTRUCTOR at Good Vibrations Gym. Some say they're PROTECTIVE and INTELLIGENT, but I’ve heard others say they're EMOTIONAL and BLUNT. When you think of HIM, don’t you think of SUNSHINE AFTER RAIN, OCEANS SO BLUE YOU CAN’T LOOK AWAY, LOYALTY SO STRONG IT CAN’T BE BROEKN?

A E S T H E T I C

swimming  to  the  bottom  of  the  ocean  .  peace  in  the  silence  .  the  sound  of  clicking  from  a  keyboard  .  mind  always  wondering  .  leaving  words  of  poetry  behind  everywhere  .  carrying  a  notebook  around  for  no  one  to  see  .  stopping  in  the  middle  of  something  to  write  something  down  .  unbreakable  loyalty  .  kind  smiles  ,  forgiving  nature  .

Q U O T E S

“  you  must  always  remember  this  :  have  courage  ,  and  be  kind .  you  have  more  kindness  in  your  little  finger  than  most  people  possess  in  their  whole  body  .  and  it  has  power  .  more  than  you  know  .  ”   –  brittany candau. “  i  see  myself  forever  and  ever  as  the  ridiculous  [ person ]  ,  the  lonely  soul  ,  the  wanderer  ,  the  restless  frustrated  artist  ,  the  person  in  love  [  with  love  ]  ,  always  in  search  of  the  absolute  ,  always  seeking  the  unattainable  .  ”   –  henry miller. “  i’m  with  you  in  rockland  . . .  where  we  are  great  writers  on  the  same  dreadful  typewriter  .  ”   –  allen ginsberg .

M U S I C    P L A Y E R

“   and  i  can't  sleep  .  i'm  up  at  night  ,  you're  in  my  ear  and  i'm  alright  .  i’m  trying  not  to  put  it  on  the  line  .  and  i  am  so  tired  of  losing  sleep  .  i  just  want  to  keep  you  around  .  you  make  me  feel  alright  .  you  make  me  feel  alright  .  you  make  me  feel  like  everything  is  gonna  be  just  fine  .  ”   just fine by spookyghostboy. “   je  veux  de  l'amour  ,  de  la  joie  ,  de  la  bonne  humeur  .  ce  n'est  pas  votre  argent  qui  fera  mon  bonheur  .  moi  je  veux  crever  la  main  sur  le  cœur  .  allons  ensemble  ,  découvrir  ma  liberté  .  oubliez  donc  tous  vos  clichés  bienvenue  dans  ma  réalité  .  ”   je veux by zaz. “   sometimes  there's  bullshit  that  don't  work  now  .  we  all  got  our  stories  but  please  tell  me  what  there  is  to  complain  about  .  when  you're  happy  like  a  fool  ,  let  it  take  you  over  .  when  everything  is  out  ,  you  gotta  take  it  in  .  oh  ,  this  has  gotta  be  the  good  life  .  ”   good life by onerepublic.

P E R S O N A L I T Y

+ intelligent, protective, and kind

- sometimes too optimists, blunt, and emotional

atlas has been through a lot of hurt. however, unlike most people he hasn’t let it change him. people take his kindness as a weakness but he see’s it as a strength... that he won’t let anyone change him no matter how cruel they can be. he wants to believe that people aren’t all bad, sometimes he tries a little too hard to believe that. but he isn’t naive either when it came to what he expected from other people. the man isn’t oblivious, he just likes to try to have hope. to not expect the worst from people until they give him no other choice to. sometimes, he also can’t help himself and is a little blunt. he never does it to be rude or hurt anyone’s feelings... it’s just he is protective and will call someone out on something in order to protect them. also the little pretentious writer in him sometimes makes him unable to stop himself from just saying certain things as they are. 

H E A D C A N O N S

001. atlas henrik laveau never knew his father, not that he ever cared about that. the boy was a huge mama’s boy. his mother was the strongest person he knew. growing up with only his mother, and his two step sisters. . . atlas grew up seeing the strength in women and couldn’t be prouder of his family.  002. however, being the only boy, atlas did always want a little brother. and he found that in a young boy whose family lived near his. it started with him just being asked to watch the young boy (eric) but eventually turned into him adoring the kid like his little brother. his family and friends all know how atlas saw the young boy and welcomed him themselves as well. 003. atlas prided himself on learning as much as he could on anything and everything. about his world under the sea and the world above. human, vampires, werewolves, witches, etc. he wanted to be ready for when he moved to the land above, it was always part of his plan. plus, he wanted to help his hybrid best friend as much as he could. 004. when he was younger, atlas’ favourite thing had always been writing and telling stories. he was always a creative person and enjoyed sharing all of his ideas. due to this, atlas was known for always thinking outside the box. 005. he ended up going through a hard time when eric was killed. it had been a day that he was asked to go watch the young boy, but he couldn’t do it. so eric’s parents moved their day around and stayed with him. atlas had finished his day early was was going to go surprise the boy and maybe offer to help out so the parents could do whatever else they could. however, when he arrived, he found the entire family had been murdered. atlas took it really hard and blamed himself. he even stopped talking for a couple of months. he spoke to NO ONE and the only person who could get some type of reaction out of him had been his best friend. 006. at the right age, atlas wasted no time in getting his ring so he could travel above land. he didn’t make the move just yet, cause he wasn’t fully ready to leave his family. but mars and him traded off on who was visiting who. he loved the land and wishes his family felt the same, but they loved the ocean too much. so he stayed for awhile longer before eventually making the move all together. though he does visit his family still. family is everything to the man. 007. he’s currently working at the gym as a swim  instructor, but he only does that while working on his book. everything is looking well for him, he already has publishers who want to work with him. he just needs to make a choice and small changes to his book that he feels he didn’t write correctly. he’s very excited about what’s to come.

C O N N E C T I O N S

BEST FRIEND. these two grew up together and have always been close. they’ve always seen each other as family and don’t keep secrets from one another. atlas knows he can tell mars anything and never be judged, just like she can do with him.   [ TAKEN ; marcelline ]

CLOSE FRIENDS. these would be the people he goes to that isn’t mars. probably someone who is a little more like him. at least in the sense where they are more kind and forgiving compared to most of the people in town. they could meet when atlas got to town and kind of just hit it off. or just sometime since he’s been around and just grew close kinda quickly. i just want him to have a couple of people he’s really close with.   [ 1/2 (could be down for three) ; tabitha ]

CO-WORKER. ever hear of a work wife/husband? that’s what this person is to atlas. they are very close and are always there to help each other. their other co-workers tease them about acting like a married couple at work, but it really is just a platonic friendship.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

EX GIRLFRIEND. i would really love one of those obvious jealous exes who broke up with their boyfriend due to him being so close to their best (girl) friend. so this person, whom atlas loved so much, really didn’t like how close atlas was to mars and grew tired of people making assumptions about him and mars. it eventually got to the point of them telling atlas to pick between them and his best friend. they didn’t realise how much atlas actually LOVED them. now, however, atlas can’t see them the same and they act very bitter toward each other.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

CRUSH. someone atlas has a bit of a crush on. they don’t need to return the feelings. this is just someone he really admires but never acts on his feelings because he doesn’t want to ruin their friend ship. *bonus points though if they do return his feelings and they are thinking the same way he is. that they are worried about ruining the friendship too.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

EX BOYFRIEND. they were friends first and things kind of just happened. it was one of those relationships that just made sense. however, after a few months, this person decided they just wanted to be friends. while it hurt atlas, he understood and agreed. yet since then, the two are just awkward around each other. atlas still has a soft spot for this person and wishes they could actually be friends again.   [ OPEN ; xx ] 

DISLIKE. atlas tried to get along with everyone, he really does. but this person just DOESN’T like him and atlas isn’t too upset about it. they rub him the wrong way anyways. or maybe it’s vice versa. . . atlas can’t stand them? they rub him the wrong way and he just CAN’T see past it.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

[grubhivemind]

FINN: -speaking of impulsive decisions, finn is now at simula's door with Sofia in her little baby carrier. they had just visited his parents, but when he left, he couldn't stop thinking about how simula lives here and how much he wanted to talk to them about that album they posted. he's nervous and his palms are sweaty, but he knocks with his free hand anyway-

SIMULA: -they already saw him coming, thanks to their wicked security cameras. they aren't quite sure what to make of it... and worst of all, he brought his damn baby along with him. they decide to let him dangle for a little while, and maybe during that time he'll just... leave. but unfortunately, curiosity gets the better of them and they drift over to the door to answer, looking positively unconcerned by his presence.- 

SIMULA: Wow. Finn. What a plea-sant sur-prise.

FINN: -his cheeks get a little red at the insincere greeting, but he makes himself take a deep breath- can we talk 

SOFIA: -drooling and looking up at simula. What an aesthetically attractive individual-

SIMULA: -thank you. I know.- 

SIMULA: We can.

FINN: -god damn it. he looks down- i mean 

FINN: i want to talk to you now

SIMULA: -weary sigh- 

SIMULA: II sup-pose you'd like to come in. -moves aside. they were taught better, at least, than to leave him hanging out there, with a baby no less.-

FINN: -relieved and terrified at the same time that simula lets him in, and he steps inside and glances around.- thanks

SIMULA: -shuts the door telekinetically and drifts on over to the living area.- Please, sit. -they won't offer him anything else, though, and promptly takes a seat themself.-

FINN: -he's grateful for this level of civility between the two of them and takes a seat on the couch, setting Sofia's carrier beside him and idly rocking it with his hand for the sake of something to do- about those 

FINN: screenshots and pictures you posted

SIMULA: What a-bout them? -examines their nails.-

FINN: why

SIMULA: Why what? 

SIMULA: Use your words.

SIMULA: Eng-lish or Span-ish will do.

FINN: why did you post them 

FINN: why did you want to humiliate me at that point in time

FINN: i know i 

FINN: did a lot of things wrong over a period of years but 

FINN: what am i doing now that makes you feel like you need to get back at me

SIMULA: -lips twitch in the slight suggestion of their facade cracking.- May-be II don't need a rea-son. 

SIMULA: May-be II just thought it would be fun-ny. 

SIMULA: And it was. 

SIMULA: May-be that's just the kind of per-son II am.

FINN: well it's not it's just the person you want to be to me 

FINN: i know you care about other people 

FINN: aren't you in a relationship right now 

FINN: i think you have to care 

FINN: so it's not the kind of person you are

SIMULA: -crosses their arms, getting indignant now that he's brought up venras.- II am in a relationship. 

SIMULA: We bask in the misfortune of oth-ers together. 

SIMULA: It's great.

FINN: -he shakes his head- no you don't 

FINN: there's a reason for me 

FINN: i know there is 

FINN: and i know i'll never be able to make up for how much i hurt you 

FINN: maybe i'm asking for some mercy even if I don't deserve it

SIMULA: -their lips purse and their arms tighten across their chest, but otherwise are keeping a relatively straight face. well... save for the sparks occasionally popping around their horns.- 

SIMULA: II don't care a-bout an-y of that. 

SIMULA: Why should II? It was so long a-go. 

SIMULA: None of what hap-pened ev-en mat-ters anymore.

FINN: well something has to be making you want me to feel bad about myself right

SIMULA: -goes quiet as they avoid looking at him, nails digging into their arms. this is stupid and they know it. what's the point in being petty? it only feels easier than confronting the truth.- 

SIMULA: You don't-- 

SIMULA: Get it. 

SIMULA: II-- -covers their face with one hand, exhaling- 

SIMULA: It's stup-id.

FINN: -he watches them, noticing the change of demeanor- it's not stupid 

FINN: especially if it's affecting you so much

SIMULA: II don't need your sentiments, II-- 

SIMULA: It... -sparks a little more, shutting their eyes tight.- 

SIMULA: It real-ly didn't mat-ter. II may as well have... Nev-er come back. From Lauc-tis. 

SIMULA: It would have been bet-ter that way.  

SIMULA: II would-n't have was-ted everyone's time.

FINN: -doesn't take his eyes off of them- what do you mean

SIMULA: ... Emilet. -winces saying it, admitting it.- 

SIMULA: You were al-ways sup-posed to be together. 

SIMULA: II fig-ured that out right away. 

SIMULA: And yet II still deluded my-self in-to think-ing otherwise. 

SIMULA: That II ev-er stood a chance again-st some-one like you. S

IMULA: That II ev-er-- 

SIMULA: Ev-en existed. As a fac-tor. 

SIMULA: II'm hard-ly ev-en a foot note in this fuck-ing fair-y tale. -hisses under their breath- 

SIMULA: But it's stu-pid. That II care. It does-n't mat-ter... 

SIMULA: II don't ev-en want to be with him anymore.

FINN: -it hurts to hear simula say that...just imagining all of the pain simula must be going through because of him. it's not like he can argue against it, because not only would it be ineffective but finn wouldn't be able to validate simula in this regard. someone else, maybe. not him. his expression softens- i'm 

FINN: no standard 

FINN: i'm kind of a fucking mess 

FINN: as you've noticed but -he sighs and rocks sofia's carrier a little more- i'm sure that doesn't really help anything

SIMULA: -hastily tries to rub away some tears prickling at the corner of their eyes. sniff.- Obviously. 

SIMULA: It's not e-ven a-bout competition. 

SIMULA: Not at this point.

SOFIA: AAAAAAA 

FINN: -he feels so bad seeing how hurt simula is- so it's everything else

SIMULA: -JUMPS. the sudden baby yelling is WAY jarring. bad sensory shit.- Hhh-- 

 SIMULA: 私は自分自身を繰り返す必要がありますか？ 

SIMULA: -sighs- It's like II said. 

SIMULA: II may as well have not e-ven been a fac-tor to be-gin with.

SOFIA: -she seems to have gotten over it- 

FINN: right 

FINN: i don't think it was for nothing though 

FINN: - looks down again- but my opinion doesn't really matter because this is how you've been feeling and 

FINN: -looks back up at them- i don't see quinne that way at all 

FINN: even if we aren't together anymore 

FINN: and despite whoever emilet chose to be with after you i know for a fact that you helped him open up more 

FINN: you were never in the way and i'm sorry that i treated you like that

SIMULA: -hearing that makes them fall quiet, the energy quickly draining from them, leaving them with little attempts to wipe away anymore tears that fall. it's hard to decide whether they want to take that as a comfort or not, but the apology is nice.- 

SIMULA: ... II know that we... You and II... 

SIMULA: Were ne-ver as close as you were to my broth-ers. 

SIMULA: But II still thought we... -glances off, embarrassed.- 

SIMULA: Were... in some way... friends. Un-till... 

SIMULA: You know.

FINN: -it hurts to watch them cry, especially when he had so much to do with it, but this conversation is necessary. it has to happen for anything to move forward.- we were and i 

FINN: lost myself to a point where that happened 

FINN: instead of working things out 

FINN: i still want to be even if it's not something that's possible

SIMULA: -looks down at their lap, considering, but speaks with earnest confliction.- II... don't know... 

SIMULA: But II do know... II want to move on from everything. II hate that it still has pow-er ov-er me. -winces-

FINN: -he nods, understanding- i'll do anything you need me to to make sure that happens

SIMULA: -there's another pause as they try to consider everything going on inside their head.- This has been... ver-y help-ful. 

SIMULA: II hate to ad-mit.

FINN: -exhales- yeah FINN: for me too

SIMULA: ... -wipes at their eyes again before folding their hands in their lap.- 

SIMULA: Who has been shar-ing the de-tails of my personal life to you that you know a-bout Ven-ras? -asks indignantly, as if finn isn't a family friend.-

FINN: -looks up and pauses- well 

FINN: ryan kind of

SIMULA: -squints into the distance- Of course.

FINN: you know her 

FINN: she's a talker

SIMULA: A gos-sip. -SAYS, AS IF TALKING ABOUT THIS STUFF ISN'T JUST NORMAL- 

SIMULA: Do you know him?

FINN: not much 

FINN: i know of him 

FINN: i saw him at ryan's homecoming party

SIMULA: Oh. Right. 

SIMULA: II for-got a-bout that. 

SIMULA: -eyeballs him a little. not that he could tell, given they are pupiless and all. but don't mind them, they're just suspicious of people knowing things about their personal life unless they divulge it.- 

SIMULA: ... Anyway. II have some things II need to do to-day.

FINN: -looks at them for a second and then catches on to what they mean- oh right 

FINN: sofia has a thing -if that thing is being a baby-

SIMULA: -stands quickly to escort him to the door- Then by all means, don't let me keep you.

FINN: -stands and takes Sofia's carrier with him- yeah 

FINN: -heads toward the door- i'll see you later

SIMULA: Yes. -opens the door for him telekinetically.- Give Colt my re-gards.

FINN: -turns to smile before leaving- i will

SIMULA: -DOESNT SMILE.- ... O-K  bye.

FINN: bye -they gone-