#i'm still just working away on my nanowrimo project

[laminy]

“I could drive.”

Ben looks over at Gwil in surprise. “Uh…”

“Well, not legally, obviously,” Gwil says, and Ben snorts.

“That sort of seems like an important bit,” he says. “Considering my education, and all.”

“Oh, that?” Gwil scoffs, and then gives Ben a playful grin. “Silly old thing.”

“Yes, that.” Ben wants to roll his eyes and protest further, but he also looks down at his arm. He’d gone to a kickboxing class with Rami just for fun (why, oh why does Rami have so much energy, it really should have been Gwil that went), but he must’ve hit the bag wrong or something. His doctor wrapped it for him; Ben’s not sure all that is necessary, but it has felt better. 

Rami and Joe have brought the kids over, instead of them usually going over there to hang out. Ben took a couple days off work. But now he’s not sure how to go about getting to the train station. Gwil’s walked down to the train station the last couple days, but Ben’s not doing that.

“I can just put it on auto,” Ben says.

“But really, you should be able to take the wheel if something happens,” Gwil says. “I have two hands.” He waves them both at Ben to prove his point.

“You also don’t know how to drive.”

“How hard could it be? I’ve seen you lot do it. Rami learned. Joe has a license. Joe’s American. If he can drive here, I certainly can.”

“Gwil.” Ben shifts on the sofa, and leans in towards him. “I appreciate you wanting to take care of me. But it would illegal. And frightening, on a personal level.” He smiles and kisses Gwil on the tip of his nose.

“Well, that does it.” Gwil quickly stands up, and Ben has to awkwardly fall back to get out of his way. 

“Does what?”

“I’m going for a spin. That’s what people say, isn’t it?”

“Sure,” Ben says. “Where are you spinning?”

“Up and down the drive,” Gwil says, as he walks out of the living room. “That’s legal, I know. Private property.”

“Ah.” Ben shakes his head, amused, but then he can hear Gwil getting the keys. And getting his shoes on. And— oh, Gwil is going outside. He’s really not joking. “Gwilym!” He hurries out to pull on his trainers, and he steps outside.

Gwil’s leaning against the car, looking amused and smug at the same time. “Come to see me off?”

“What are you doing?” Ben asks. 

“I just want to see if I can do it,” Gwil says. “For a minute.”

“If you want to drive, take lessons,” Ben says. “I can’t teach you.”

“I at least want to see if I can turn it on.” Gwil unlocks the car and climbs into the driver’s seat. “Oh! It’s a bit different on this side.”

“I’ve had my seat just how I like it for years now,” Ben says. “And you’re going to ruin that for me.”

“Are you getting in?” Gwil asks.

“How far are you going?” Ben asks.

“Down the hill.”

“Nope. Too close to the road.”

“Let me see if I can turn it around up here then.”

Ben sighs, and looks around, debating just how stupid this is. On a scale of Rami to Joe, it’s closer to Joe. But… Ben sighs again. How bad could it be? Famous last words? “Fine.”

Gwil cheers, and Ben walks around to the other side of the car. “Knew I’d win you over.”

“I need to save you from yourself.” They buckle in, and Ben looks over. “Alright. Start it up.”

“That part’s easy.” There’s a button to push to start, so even Gwil’s got that. “Ooh, love.” Gwil grins at him. “Look at me go.”

Ben laughs softly. As much as he thinks this is still a stupid idea, at least Gwil is entertained. 

“Now what’s this say?” Gwil pushes his glasses up and leans in towards the screen. “Do I want to be on auto or manual? Manual, obviously.” He hits the button and then grips the steering wheel. “Got my pedals down here.” He hits the gas and Ben jumps at the sound of the engine revving. “Whoops.”

“Other one.”

“Sorry, love.” Gwil looks down and gently presses his foot on the brake, and then he carefully shifts the car into drive. 

“Slowly,” Ben says, nervously curling his fingers into his leg. “Don’t take your foot off all at once.”

“Right.” Gwil slowly lifts his foot, and then he lets out a sound of delight as the car starts to roll forward. “I’m driving!”

“Mm-hmm.”

Gwil hunches forward as they slowly inch forward, and Ben reaches out, tapping him on the arm. “Oh, sit back?”

“Yeah.”

“Right.” Gwil sits back, and tightly grips the steering wheel. “I’m going to hit the gas.”

“Oh god,” Ben murmurs.

“Just a little.”

“Right.” 

Gwil taps on the gas and they surge forward— not much, but enough to make Ben’s stomach twist. They come to the end of the drive, and Gwil is smart enough to know that he should push on the brake before they start driving on the grass. A little too quickly, but they’re not going fast enough to jerk too hard. “Back in park.”

Ben looks around. “Thought you said you were going to turn around.”

“Oh, I don’t think so.”

Ben smiles. “No?”

“Not sure that’s for the best.”

Ben’s smile grows, and he leans over to kiss Gwil on the cheek. “That went better than I was expecting, honestly. You drove! Technically. You didn’t like it?”

“I can feel my heart,” Gwil says, touching his chest. “I’m not sure about that.” He looks at Ben. “Sorry I can’t drive you to work.”

“That’s alright,” Ben says. “I appreciate the effort.”

“It was sort of scary, isn’t it?”

Ben bites down on a smile. Gwil literally went to space, faster than the speed of light. Though, to be fair, Ben knows that Gwil wasn’t the one driving (piloting?) the Mercury. “Can be.”

Gwil unbuckles and moves to open the car door, and Ben’s arm shoots out, hitting Gwil in the chest. “Ow! What?”

“The car’s still on,” Ben says. “You just put it in park.”

“Oh, fuck.” Gwil hits the button to stop the engine, and then he settles back in his seat. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“I’m going to stick my bike.”

“Yeah, probably for the best.”

[tumblydovereviews]

What Failing NaNoWriMo Taught Me

This is a change in subject from the usual media posts, but I wanted to try and broad out the scope of my writing a bit.

If you are even remotely familiar with the online writing community, you will probably know what NaNoWriMo is. Every November, writers from all around the world scramble to start an all-new story and to finish that very story by the last day of the month. And, did I mention that this novel needs to be 50,000 words at the least?

Being the bored person I am, I decided to take a risk and try the challenge out. And thus, half my October was spent forming a new world with new characters and a unique plot. On November 1st, I gathered up my supplies, booted up my laptop and started the grand journey into the wild west that is NaNo season.

Obviously, if you read the title of this article, you would know how that went.

I wrote only approximately 29,000 words for my novel. That's it. Out of the 50,000 words I was planning on writing, I barely made it half-way through.

But yet, despite my technical failure, I don't think competing in NaNoWriMo was a complete waste. I learned quite a few lessons from the journey, both writing and non-writing related, and I'm here to share them with you.

Hydrate, hydrate, HYDRATE: Like many others, I have trouble keeping a consistent amount of water in my daily diet. Somedays, I'll hardly drink any at all and on others, chugging down is all that I'll do. A few years ago, my lack of hydration actually landed me in the ER on an IV. Most of the time, we are taught only to drink water to keep our bodies going. But, I learned that when I was sufficiently hydrated while writing, I could go on for much longer periods of time compared to when I was thirsty. As it turns out, drinking water and fluids can also have a positive impact on our brain function!

Create goals based off your personal style: I'm not too bad of a chronic procrastinator. Like all of us have, occasionally I'll put projects aside towards the last minute, but for the most part, I'm a pretty good worker. My problem is working consistently- I concentrate much better in controlled bursts of time than in a long session, but at the same time, I don't like leaving work unfinished. If I start a chapter, I'm going to finish it no matter what, for better or for worse. For NaNoWriMo, I decided to aim on finishing at least one chapter of my story per day. That way, I would have a manageable amount of work while still staying productive in the process.

At the same time, life is WAY more important than writing: Throughout November, Thanksgiving, school, and the start of the holidays in general impeded my ability to write as much as I could have. And that's okay! Writing is just one part of my life, not my entire well-being. I try to divide the different aspects of my life into certain 'parts,' from my academic part to my author part for tumblydovereviews. This helps me to throw away any worries I mayhave about another 'part,' and instead focus my whole self onto one part at a time.

Grow a closer bond with your characters: I loved my characters. I thought about them throughout the day and as I wrote. I came up with their favorite activities, movies, and foods, and imagined scenarios for them in my head. In a way, this made writing them easier as I knew more about how they would react and why.

And, if no matter what you try, you still fail NaNoWriMo...: That's okay! Remember, the entire point of this challenge is to have fun while also completing a story in the process. No matter what happens, I'm proud of you for trying. You're doing great!

Will I decide to complete NaNoWriMo again next year? It remains to be seen. But one thing remains clear: even through my failure, I still love to write. I still love to read. I still want to create stories and worlds and essays. And, nothing will stop me from doing that.

[griseldabanks]

I've been seriously considering participating in SlowMoWriNo, a variation on NaNoWriMo where, instead of writing 50k of a story in a single month, the goal is to write for approximately 15 minutes a day for a year, starting this November, and hopefully have a novel done in a year's time. It's a challenge for those who are busy and/or burnt out, which perfectly describes me right now. I'm getting pretty close to finishing the first draft of my current WIP, and while I should probably just take a break from any sort of organized writing for the rest of the year to avoid a complete burnout, I also really like the idea of SlowMoWriNo.

So I think I'm going to do it. I can push myself for fifteen minutes a day, right? In order to still be giving myself a break from the hefty fanfic project I've been focusing on for the past four years or so, I'd like to use SlowMoWriNo to work on one of my woefully neglected original stories. Even if all I have to show for my work after a year is an outline or notes rather than 50k of readable story, it will be more than I've got right now!

I've got quite a few story ideas that have been gathering dust in my mind for years now, so which one should I dust off and take a poke at? I'll describe each one below the poll. Basically, you're voting for which story you'd like to hear updates on and potentially get excerpts from, because I'll be doing that for accountability purposes in the year ahead.

The Ambassadors - Sean is scrubbing the floor of his village's chapel when the village is attacked by a rampaging dragon. Before he knows what's happening, the dragon smashes through the chapel and dies. With her last breath, she places a dragon egg at his feet. The egg hatches in his hands, revealing a baby dragon with black scales. Though he has heard all his life about how evil and dangerous dragons are, Sean just can't bring himself to let any harm come to the baby dragon. So, changing his name to Shard, he runs away to find a place where he and his new dragon friend can live in peace. Medieval fantasy, dragon rider story, lots of angst and lots of fluff, no romance but lots of friendship with an emphasis on brotherly love between the main character and his dragon, strong Christian themes (complete with my own barely-disguised fantasy Christian religion :P). The first draft is written, but I need to completely rewrite it because I've reworked and refined a lot of the plot and worldbuilding.

The Arcblade - Aiden Averrod, captain of the airship Robin, is just about broke and looking for work for his crew when a mysterious noblewoman hires him to give her transport on her quest for the fabled Arcblade, a mystical weapon said to bring peace to their war-torn land when it is unsheathed. Reluctantly, because he has no other choice and because the young lady has a fat purse with promise of another one forthcoming when the quest is achieved, Aiden agrees and sets off on a quest that will completely upend his life. Eighteenth century-ish fantasy, steampunk (crystalpunk? is that a thing?), serious laced with humor, swashbuckling, includes a romance between major characters. So far, I've written a grand total of two scenes and then realized I needed to revisit the worldbuilding -_-

bartender story (unnamed) - Bob is the friendly, rotund third-generation owner of the town's tavern. All is going well in his life until a band of heroes comes through and...well, one thing leads to another, and in the end, Bob's tavern is just a pile of ashes. Demanding repayment for damages, Bob tags along with the band of misfits as they continue their quest to save the world from the Dark Lord. Medieval fantasy, satire with a heart, tongue-in-cheek poking fun at fantasy cliches, probably no romance but we'll see. Nothing written for this so far.

broken heart story (unnamed) - Annie has had a crush on [unnamed heartthrob] for years, but would never dare tell him. After all, she's ugly. She's fat. She has terrible acne. She's cripplingly shy, and she's been picked on and bullied her whole life. There's nothing he would ever find attractive about her. But one day she happens to witness [unnamed girl] cast a spell on him that turns his heart into an origami heart made of many separate pieces of paper folded in on each other, which she pulls apart and scatters to the winds. Without his heart, [unnamed heartthrob] has no emotions, no personality, and his so-called friends start avoiding him because he's acting so weird. Taking pity on him, Annie decides to get his heart back. Even if it might break her own heart in the process. Modern-day urban fantasy, probably some kind of magical school setting (maybe university-level?), angsty drama, romance, basically a reverse Beauty and the Beast about true love looking past the surface. Nothing written for this so far.

clone sister story (unnamed) - [Older sister] is struggling to accept the clone of her deceased younger sister, who has just been completed and come home from the lab. The decision to clone [younger sister] was a snap decision her mother made in the throes of her grief after the accident, but since then the whole family has come to grips with the knowledge that [younger sister] is gone forever. But the cloning process was already started, and her mother was unwilling to pull the plug, because she believed that clone was a real person, a real little girl who needed a mommy. Now that little girl is coming home, and they all have to remember that, just because she looks exactly like [younger sister], she is a different person. [Older sister] isn't sure what to think. Near-future sci-fi, family drama, angst and grief, family relationships with a focus on the sisters, strong Christian and pro-life themes. Nothing written for this so far.

The Family - The Shiwaga family is a wealthy, well-respected clan that has been a pillar of the town of Avalanche for generations. What no one realizes is that they're also secretly a mafia-like organization working to sabotage the government, believing it was usurped from the rightful ruler - someone Shiwaga hopes to be able to influence once they have been returned to power. (This story is actually kind of hard to summarize, both because it's currently a mess and because there's at least a dozen main characters who are all supposed to be equally important.) Meiji Japan-inspired epic fantasy, huge cast of characters with opposing motivations, family drama as well as world-threatening crises, romances as well as friendship/familial relationships are front-and-center, currently the ending is more bitter than sweet but I want to reevaluate that. This was the story I worked on the two times I've done NaNoWriMo before, so two of three parts are written, but in a very slapdash fashion that's basically just a fleshed-out outline that will probably have to be completely rewritten anyway. The original thought was to make this a trilogy.

The Four - Timor was found as a small child, abandoned in the forest and somehow managing to eke out an animal-like survival. Since then, he has been raised in the home of Avadris, a one-time counselor to the High King, who has been dead for years. As Timor grows older, Avadris slowly puts two and two together and begins to suspect Timor is actually the High King's son that everyone thought was killed the same night the king and queen were. In the hopes of restoring the order and prosperity they enjoyed under the High King's reign, Avadris announces Timor as the heir to the throne when he turns twelve. Though he asked for none of this, Timor suddenly finds himself running for his life from those who want nothing to do with a new High King, accompanied by strangers who may become friends - or may end up killing him. Medieval epic fantasy, adventure/quest, non-traditional fantasy races/peoples, no romance but various platonic relationships among the impromptu band of companions. This is what I consider to be my first "real" story idea, but even though I came up with it when I was twelve and still believe in its potential, I've never finished a draft and don't really know how it ends anymore ^^' Probably needs to be started over from scratch for the...fourth or fifth time.

four siblings story (unnamed) - Jack, Sophie, Rebecca, and Grace are recently orphaned siblings who know they have to stick together to survive. The good news is, they all have superpowers that have manifested as they struggle with their grief over their parents. As they try to gain control over their powers and figure out how to balance them with the serious side effects those powers bring, they are taken in by the wealthy Dr. Clementine, a jovial old philanthropist who promises to be like a grandfather to them while also giving them opportunities and resources to hone their supernatural skills to the fullest. But it's not long before the four siblings begin to suspect his motives are more sinister than they seemed at first. Modern-day urban fantasy, children's/YA fiction, adventure, no romance but a heck-ton of positive sibling relationships and eventually found family, standalone with possible sequel potential. Meant to evoke some combination of Escape to Witch Mountain, The Girl Who Could Fly, and E. Nesbit (Five Children and It)/Edward Eager (Half Magic) books.

[eurydicees]

current thoughts on nanowrimo while i only vaguely do work from home (<- dont tell my employers but i don't think i should have to work when i could be writing).

***i will not be using the website due to the pedophilia and lack of moderation issues. i don't want to involve myself in anything even remotely related to that. however imo the challenge of nanowrimo is bigger than the website, and so i'll still be attempting it.

current potential project ideas!

go back to the iwaoisuga atla au. i've got a lot of snippets but nothing substantial, so i would feel fine starting over and just working on that through the month. bonus is that i get to finish my rewatch.

do a prompt/request/event speedrun again. i have a lot of projects i committed to that i need to complete but haven't been looking at recently and i could just work on all those miscellaneous pieces. i actually have around 25 requests that've been waiting for attention so tbh writing a ~2k word one shot per day, give or take, could be great pacing for this challenge. unfortunately i'm probably incapable of keeping a oneshot to 2k. but this could also be an exercise in pacing myself. maybe.

write something original for the first time in so so so long. idk what it would be but i've been wanting to work on original writing again for a while now and this could be the opportunity.....i just don't have any plot ideas. which makes this idea hard. for obvious reasons.

re: original writing. i could do original short stories. this could be fun. it would involve coming up with a new idea roughly every day or every few days. which would be hard. but i've done it before and while i'm out of practice with original writing, surely i can do it again? idk it could be a fun exercise. i do love writing fucked up life altering short stories.

return to my roots and finish the poetry collection. i want to finally complete this. i've been chipping away at it for a while but i want to commit to it. but also i don't think i could get to 50k words with just poetry.....so maybe not this month. maybe save for april 2025 with a lower word count goal? idk. much to think abt with this one. or honestly maybe i can make it 50k. like if i try REALLY hard. very hard maybe on this one.

attempt the iwaoi soulmate + MCD au. i've been tossing this idea around for a while but it's looking like a huge undertaking so i haven't really worked on it. maybe this is my chance? but also it's probably the project idea i'm least passionate about so maybe not this one. i need to choose something i'm crazy abt lol.

finally finish the transforming of the skts mental illness study fic to original writing. this was a project i started AGES ago and then never completed. i actually just remembered it exists while scrolling through old drafts lol. it was a neat project to work on for a while but i got a little burnt out on it, which could bode badly for nanowrimo, which is such a passion-and-stamina-necessary challenge lol. but also maybe the commitment and accountability that's also so necessary for nano would inspire me? kind of a toss up.

thoughts on my november goals!

goal is 50k words in 30 days. go big or go home hit it till it breaks etc etc. i am going to work so fucking hard. i am pouring everything into this. i'm not manifesting, i'm DOING.

i'm 26,266 words away from 1mill words written for nanowrimo (all time, incl april/july camps). this could be such a fun milestone. i will get there. i WILL get there.

i'm also 54,800 words exactly away from 1mill published on ao3, which is also a super exciting milestone.....so maybe i do really want to just write a long ass fic for this.

i'm currently at 12 nanowrimo wins to 11 losses all time, and 6 wins to 5 losses in the november 50k challenge specifically. i am on cusp of something great.

i am also at a streak of 4 november wins in a row. i am DETERMINED to keep it up. like there are literally no consequences for not doing this. i know that. i promise i know that. but still. i am DETERMINED.

[homerjacksons]

what are your top 5 fave fanfics you've written?

Oooh thank you for the question! It took me a bit to like...actually decide? I have 120 published works on AO3 and while an awful lot are Not Good, there's also quite a few I am fond of.

Still I See You, Celestial - Law and Order SVU - Rafael Barba/Sonny Carisi

This is the biggest fic I've ever written. It was a nanowrimo project and tbh I haven't reread it in so long and I'm terrified it's actually awful but the fact that I wrote that many words into a cohesive story is something I'm proud of.

Blue Christmas - Law and Order SVU - Sonny Carisi/Peter Stone

idk why but I actually think about this one a lot and I reread it semi-regularly which may be embarrassing to admit but I don't care

That Old Feeling - Law and Order SVU - Rafael Barba/Sonny Carisi

It had been so long since I'd written for Barisi and then I wrote this and it still stands out in my mind as one of my best, if not my actual best, Barisi fics.

sunlight, sunlight, sunlight - Law and Order SVU - Kat Tamin/Amanda Rollins

LOOK. It's rare that I find f/f potential in my dumb shows cos unless I'm specifically seeking out f/f content, I so often find that female characters and female relationships on screen are just so poorly written that I am never inspired (and I'm a big weirdo who almost never feels inspired to write fic for canon ships???). So when these two inspired me???? When I had a canon bi on my fave show??? I had to. And I am still so pleased with how sweet and soft this turned out.

the feeling of audible cracks - Ripper Street - Homer Jackson/Edmund Reid

This is a very very recent one and I probably could have found better. But this one is also just...very personal to me. I've always shied away from sharing fics like this one because people like to attack those who write them and I'm an insecure baby. But this fandom is teeny and I give less fucks than I used to, so I wrote this one for me and shared it for anyone who may wish to read it.

[pb-dot]

Wip Wednesday: Status Rapport

This week, I figured I'd use this slot to talk a little about where I'm at in the project that is The Clockwork Boy. The reason for this is twofold. For one, I'm nearing what I think is a very important threshold in the process and I'm excited to talk about that. For the other this week has been a Bad Brain Week so I haven't been able to come up with anything else to write.

So where am I at with The Clockwork Boy? Put plainly, I'm pretty close to done. Well, done might be an overstatement as I don't plan to consider the thing truly done until I hold a printed copy in my hands, but I'm rapidly approaching the "as done with it as I can get by my lonesome" point. Rewriting has gone slower than I had hoped for several reasons, chiefly some migraine problems that have been keeping me down lately.

Despite being a mite off schedule for this bit, though, I will say I am very happy with the work I've done. In addition to fixing messy grammar and some go-nowhere dialog, I have almost entirely rewritten some scenes that went from being aimless and kind of disposable to some of my favorite moments in the book. I still feel the mild to moderate distress that is recognizing my own writing, and I suspect I will do that as long as I still write, but I've come to the point that I realize it's a better version of the same. It's a start, at least.

Next up, I plan to do something about the "by myself" part of the equation by roping in some fools recruiting someone whose abilities and tastes I trust for a beta read. This is pretty scary to me, but I fully recognize that it is a necessary step in the process. For the duration of the rewrite I've felt like I'm missing something, but considering this darn thing has lived in my head for nigh on a year now, I can't be sure if that's a healthy hunch or just anxiety giving me the business. So, I hope some fresh eyes on the whole thing will help me either sate or quiet that voice.

After getting the beta reads back and doing any changes I feel it needs after that, the next step is, unfortunately, starting to query publishers and/or agents. I'm not looking forward to this bit, but considering how I do want the book actually published and don't feel capable of doing all that indie publishing requires of me, there's just no way around it.

I expect the whole query business will take some time, so I haven't planned much past that point. I plan on doing NaNoWriMo this year, and although I am considering starting work on the first Hearts In Clockwork sequel right away, I recognize that I need a bit of a break right now. Most people would, perhaps, not take a writing break that consists of getting lost in the sauce of another month-long writing sprint, but I rather like doing just that, so do that I shall.

I'm not sure which of my potential projects I'm going to do for NaNo this year, but I am considering one of my horror pitches, possibly The Artists or a hitherto untitled one dealing with a Norse variant of the living dead, the Draugr. Either way, I'm going to write a draft that is probably way too long and entirely too indulgent, and odds are good I'll have a blast.

So, not the most exciting WIP update from ol' Peebs today, but some days one just needs to be one's own project manager and talk dates and estimates and what have you. In the process of writing this, late enough that it felt weird to discard this in favor of it, of course, I came up with an interesting idea for next week's WIP Wednesday, so look forward to that.

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[t-lane-writes]

2024

What do I expect of this year? What do I want to write?

For starters, I decided to give up on two WIPs that I will likely not write, at least not soon. The Ribbon was supposed to be a companion piece to Ananke (both could be around 40k stories, so together they'd make the length of a whole novel), but since Ananke has been shortened, The Ribbon is not necessary. And on its own it doesn't have enough pull for me to finish it.

Untitled Sentira project is... well, the name itself is enough to tell you my feelings about it. I still think the worldbuilding for this story, or rather the one that existed before, is spectacular. I'm not giving up on the Sentira world, but maybe I'll do something completely different with it? The novel idea, the characters I tried to design for it, the plot -- they just didn't really click, so. This particular story will not happen, at least not in the form of a novel.

Hmm... I should update my pinned post... Later.

Now, what will I write?

I'm changing the ending of Ananke. The second half, ten chapters, require a lot of changes and I want to do it, like, now. First half of January, then mabe final re-read right away, or maybe some pro editor? IDEK. Or a re-read in February. And then I want to send it to three sci-fi magazines and see if they bite.

I started to edit The Specters, but now that I'm back at work I don't think I'll be able to work on two things simultanously, so I'm putting it on the backburner until I'm done with Ananke, and then I'll probably continue second draft until the end of February.

I've been having feels about Crystal Spring Valley lately -- it means I miss Priya and Tenney and the gang. I might take March and April to look at this story and maybe get through that Turning Point finally. I don't hope to finish it, but, as usual, make as much progress as I can.

May could be a good moment to work on the spreadsheet and maybe even pre-draft of The Duke and the B Brothers -- so that I could tackle the first draft during NaNoWriMo. Ha! Yes.

Then I should return to Black Wings and its second draft for June and July (or perhaps even longer), and that would more-or-less conclude my current WIPs.

August, September and October would remain "to be decided". I also have Mars Idea in very early stages of development, so I might give it a month here or there. And then do some more work on either on the most advanced WIPs, meaning Crystal Spring, Specters or Black Wings.

November would be the first draft of The Duke, of course, and then December... Maybe rest after NaNo, lol, or finish The Duke, because 50k will likely not be enough.

So that's that. That's the plan. :)

[melodyofthevoid]

Writing Wrap Up 2023

Another weird year, to be sure. Between finishing up school, job hunting, moving out, and all sorts of family things, it's been... a really slow year. It's a feeling I keep coming back to, this feeling like I'm not doing enough. Like there's some invisible deadline that I'm failing to meet. And that failure is what's keeping me from getting any enjoyment out of the works I do finish.

But that's not really... helpful, is it? Loathe as I am to admit it, focusing on what I did accomplish makes me feel better and it is worth celebrating, I think. Darn therapy actually giving me helpful tips and advice.

Now, most of what I wrote this year I shared exclusively with friends. Tbh this is both because it's all been pretty self indulgent OC stuff ngl, but also it's niche content for my DnD characters. But both Lorna and Alexi got some really excellent pieces, and Euripheus' origin/demise piece was another one I enjoyed doing.

Except for the part where I had to write an awkward family discussion/fight. Nearly did me in.

On a different note, Alexi's AU piece clocks in at nearly 10k words, which is the longest one-shot I've ever done. Bonkers. I really just wanted to torment him, huh?

Aside from that, I've been diligently chipping away at my worldbuilding documents, each of which is wildly different in construction/layout. Mostly due to their different reasons for being, and purposes. The OI one is the least developed as of now, but I hope in the next week to really dive into (hah) the nations and make those tangible cultures. My Fading Reflections one only really needs a timeline and some loose details added here and there.

The Sun/Moon game concept expanded to having a separate NPC doc, and I'm testing out how the dialogue could theoretically sound. In Stars and Time really inspired me, and I think it'll be a fun little side project as I side eye other things.

Then my big one, the Crane Wives Analysis. It's the first time I've ever done something like that and it really gave me a deeper appreciation for a band I already adore. 20k words over the course of the year, with half of those coming in November alone when I did NaNoWriMo for the first time! Not the traditional way that event works, but I completed all my goals, so hooray!

I also did nearly half of the Whumptober prompts I picked out, and am still doing those when I feel stuck.

I don't know where this next year will take me in terms of writing. I'm starting my new job, which while extremely exciting, does raise the question of Time. I'm on my own, going to have to do all the Adult Things™, and free time is definitely going to be at a premium. It does worry me, but I'll adjust (I hope).

So yeah! I'll attach links to some of my works below the cut, and wish you all a happy new year! Thanks for sticking around!

The Well Analysis

TCW: Singles

True Reflections (Magnus Archives Fanstatement)

TCW: Foxlore

TCW: Coyote Stories

TCW: The Fool in Her Wedding Gown

TCW: Safe Ship, Harbored

"Captive"

Bodies Are Business

Reassignment

[darekasama]

Blog intro and greetings

Here’s my blog! This is me (hiiii I’m darekasama, mid-20s she/her Italiaaaan) Some post made you curious so you came to sightsee. I’m writing a story, slow burn, LGBTQ I’m having lots of fun… and I hope you will too. I got a fantasy world There is magic around Also geese (actually dinosaurs) running around! The main duo are dudes Both can do wild stuff Drama that makes you go “wooo” That’s my jam!

Aaaaaaan CUT.

Now that I got your attention by singing...

(Updated as of October 2024)

Greetings!

My nickname is darekasama (mid-20s she/her Italian) and I'm a certain someone who mostly enjoys life.

My interests include but are not limited to:

writing and storytelling

drawing and art of many kinds

small crafts and general fuckery

The genre doesn't usually matter if you can pull me in, but I do have a tendency for fantasy and romance. I also think animals are neat and you can always find out something wonderful about the world around you. Big fan of communication and positivity!

I am very passionate about what I do however don't be surprised if I disappear for weeks at a time. Sometimes I'm ruminating, sometimes I'm having a fistfight with life. Metaphorically. And I'd rather keep out the bad vibes from my happy corner.

Feel free to talk to me in any capacity! Dinosaurs may bite but I don't. Questions about characters? Worldbuilding? Plotting? Random pieces of information you never got to tell someone? Come at me!

What can you find on this blog, you ask?

Anything that is tangentially included in the points above and especially stuff about my current WIP. Could be my ramblings on the outline, random bouts of inspiration, some cool sentences and snippets and on very good days I may put up a drawing too because I can do art of my own characters (yeaaaa)! Very slowly and it takes me forever, but it might happen.

I’m still tinkering my tags on tumblr, the main ones for now are:

reblog          Curious what I do in my free time? Go check it out.

my blog        What I post myself. On the tumblr. Do do do dooo

my writing    Look at what I can do with words!

my art          Look at what can I so with pigments!!!

project tl      Look at it!!!!!!!

Try also:

dromaeosaurs A.K.A. the sickle clawed raptors

interesting Stuff that makes you go huh

inspiration Stuff that makes you go wow

resources Stuff useful for art and/or writing

writeblr

artblr

art

What’s the WIP about?

After an unspecified amount of time, HERE will be a masterpost more in detail about it. Check back later and click on that or any mention of the project to jump to it.

You may recognise this WIP from the old NaNoWriMo forums. Yes it’s the same.

Below is a bite-sized appetizer. I proudly present…

Project TL

The story that has monopolised my fantasies. It' is currently a seven books series, comprised of a quadrilogy and a trilogy. All are outlined and book 1 is actively in the works.

Book 1: Runaway Heir (working title)

The main protagonist LIAM is a young noble boy who due to his mentor's untimely departure from life, instead of studying martial arts, spends his summer completely unsupervised getting his nose into the local drama, adventuring, and treasure hunting. Someone please reign him in fast.

Meanwhile, the other protagonist and future love interest TERI is in his last year of apothecary apprenticeship and encounters mostly self inflicted troubles in everyday life that he solves by running away or shapeshifting into a dinosaur, whichever works. Unfortunately, it really doesn’t.

And this is an early spoiler… they become roommates.

Featuring:

Narrators who are older versions of the main couple! Good ending is certain and self-reflections were made. Maybe.

Magic items and creative problem solving/making by using them.

Teenagers and their questionable decision making. Just imagine.

Fantasy biology & society. When parthenogenesis is involved, family trees and relationships get messy…

Mentions of transmigration and philosophy about life’s meaning.

Paleontologically accurate dinosaurs! Mostly members of the Dromaeosauridae family, the raptors with the sickle claw, but also many more prehistoric beasts...

That’s all for now!

Go scamper around and most importantly… have fun!

[inadreamerslibrary]

...guess who's gonna try doing april camp nanowrimo? (no, this isn't an april fool's post, i'm actually gonna be doing it)

nano in november was pretty much a bust because it's the worst time for students, especially college students like myself. it's the end of midterms and the beginning of finals. and as an english creative writing major i'm writing a ton for those midterms and finals, so i'm less motivated to work on my draft. april is a kinda similar time.

but for this month i have something i didn't have before; an almost-completed outline! i'm continuing to work on project garden, which is the novel i started during 2023 july camp nano. i'd say i'm almost half-way through the first draft. what really started holding me back was reaching the middle portion of the novel and not knowing what to write. so after stepping away from the project and thinking a lot, i've pretty much got the entire plot written down! i wasn't able to completely finish it, i'm still trying to work out the ending and the big climax. but i have enough to begin writing once morning hits (and after i've written my poetry midterm that's due on tuesday...).

like last july camp nano, i'm making my goal 40k words, but i'm kinda hoping that i go over that. mainly i just want to finish this first draft, even if it has to carry over into may. i have NEVER finished the first draft of a novel, so it would be a big step for me.

if anyone else is participating in april camp nano, lemme know! my nano user is meguca_ so feel free to send a friend request! :D

[nettlestingsoup]

hi morgan! i hope you're well. i've got a Lot of asks for the end-of-year ask game, but hey, it's the end of the year, we may as well go out with a bang! how about 1, 3, 9, 10, 15, 16 (I know you like to match your songs to your wips), 18, 19, 20, 21 and 30? <3

honey! thank you for this! i've answered 10 and 19 here for spook, but let's tackle the rest of them! i can't really do short answers, so this is going to be monstrous.

1: this year i've definitely tried to write things that are a tiny bit more adult! i still won't do explicit sex scenes, but i've definitely pushed my boundaries in songs from within birdcages, lichtenberg, and the minchan vampire au, and it's been pretty fun to push myself out of my comfort zone with that and figure out how to incorporate those scenes into a story.

3: i think i've learned that i genuinely enjoy writing things closer to horror! with lichtenberg, the vampire au, and my nanowrimo original project (currently on hiatus while i recover from the health issues and nano burnout) i've had the opportunity to write things that are kind of weird and awful and uncanny, and i've found that i absolutely love doing it. here's to getting spookier in 2024!

9: the red thread au has meant so much to me to write; as a queer person, and someone autistic, and someone who frequently experiences the very weird sensation of not being quite as real as everyone around me, it's been a joy to write the story of seungmin slowly being drawn into humanity and all its joys by his soulmate. it's gentle and soft and i've loved exploring things like new sensory experiences and seungmin learning to understand his perception of his gender and sexuality and the idea of feeling like he belongs. it'll be a while before it's finished to a degree i think is satisfactory, but i'm excited to share it eventually.

15: i only posted two fics this year, so i'll rec the one i'm not currently posting! songs from within birdcages is a science fiction adventure romance between a freighter pilot and the high-end prostitute he falls in love with and plans to set free; it's a story of hope, and home, and love enduring despite darkness, and a determined belief in fairytales; it gets dark at times, but there's always a light at the end. i'm genuinely very proud of it, and i'm planning a sort of spin-off next year covering my favourite side ship and how a romance could develop between a man and a machine who's only just learning how to feel.

16: writing songs!!!! hell yes!!! you know i love a writing song!!!! i'll include five, one for each fic i've worked on this year.

songs from within birdcages: constellations, jade lemac

lichtenberg: let this remain, alana henderson

the beekeeper au: true as true can get, kaiyko

the red thread au: you're so fucking pretty, the regrettes

the vampire au: iodine and iron, the veils

18: the red thread au still has no title. i'm 41k into it and i just have no ideas at all! i'm waiting for inspiration to strike as i work on it.

20: my favourite ending line of the year is definitely the last line of songs from within birdcages:

The lights of the Rinan Cluster fade away behind them, electric lilac and artificial green; and by the time Chan and Hyunjin remember to try to watch them go - to witness their past blur into nothing but pinpricks in the far distance, indistinguishable from the stars - they’ve disappeared entirely.

it's a good end to hyunjin and chan's journey, i think, to be so absorbed in one another that they forget to watch the old life that hurt them so badly fade away. they deserve that.

21: my favourite piece of dialogue is this little snippet from the beekeeper au; i think it just really shows off chan's warmth and his enthusiasm for his bees!

“You don’t have to get right up close,” he tells Jisung. “But it’s worth it if you feel comfortable with it. They’re beautiful little creatures, and amazing builders.” He smiles, looking almost giddy with joy. “Every time I look in the hives I fall in love with them a bit, you know? Seeing what they can do.” “I don’t really know a lot about bees,” Jisung admits, and Chan shakes his head animatedly. “That’s ok! I can tell you a few things. Just, uh- let me know if I go on about it too much, yeah? I tend to get carried away.”

30: i have so much i want to write in 2024 on top of finishing current projects! i'd love to finally sit down and write the minchan hanahaki au (hanahaki is next after vampires on the list of 'tropes i've been desperate to write but only once i think i have something unique to bring to it'), as well as the 2min songs from within birdcages spinoff. i think i'd also love to write something for another fandom; i have a small store of wangxian ideas i'd love to write, but i keep getting drawn back into skz.

thank you so much for these asks! i'm sorry my answers were so very long! <3

[meaninglessblah-writes]

☕️🦇🤫📸

Thank you for helping me work towards my Nanowrimo goal 💙

Bruce leans his chin on his fist, looking the picture of refined ease leaned forward in his armchair. "I don't see the appeal."

Tim adjusts the focus, bringing the cape and cowl into clarity. "It's about the artistry," he says. It's not entirely the truth, but it's not entirely a lie. He shuffles through a few settings until he can really bring Bruce's cheekbones into focus. "Capturing you in a light not many people get to see."

Bruce's lips twist like he doesn't believe Tim for a second. But he shifts back into a more comfortable lean, thighs spreading wide to invite the eyeline of Tim's camera.

He follows the slope of Bruce's stomach down, tilting the camera on its tripod and flicking through a few quick snaps. Tim leans into the eyepiece when he instructs, "You can undo the belt now."

Bruce doesn't move, and after a moment Tim pulls back, flushing a little in his sheepishness.

"Can you take the belt off, please," he amends to, and Bruce smirks.

His fingers slip down to flick open the buckle one-handed, in a brilliant show of competence Tim wishes he was fast enough to catch on film. He doesn't mention how it leaves his throat a little dry, seeing a man so intimately in-tune with his own body. It's a little intimidating, and more than a little arousing.

"You really get into a headspace when you do this," Bruce observes, and then clarifies at Tim's blank expression, "Directing."

"Oh." Tim's directed a few home movies, but he more prefers still life photography, trying to encapsulate the perfect split second of a moment eternally. "It's a passion project."

"A passion project," Bruce repeats, like he's tasting the words. The yellow belt falls to either side of his hips, the long curve of his waistline prominent without the belt to intersect it.

Tim buries his embarrassment behind the eyepiece. It's easier to say his next words when there's the distance of glass between them. "When you're ready, start touching yourself."

Bruce doesn't wither under the direction. Maybe it's the benefit of not being able to see his eyes, but Bruce usually exudes calm. Tim doesn't know why he expected any less when it came to the unrufflable Batman.

One large, gloved hand slides up his thigh — tantalisingly slow beneath the gaze of Tim's camera — to grip himself through the front of his suit. He's done away with the jockstrap and cup at Tim's request, and now the thick curve of his hardening member is all too visible through the kevlar.

Tim adjusts his zoom, ensuring the triangle of Bruce's crotch is perfectly framed as he snaps a few photos. "That's perfect. Take your time. The slower you go, the more I have to work with."

"I do have one question," Bruce interjects thoughtfully. His hand doesn't stray from where it's slowly stroking his cock through the kevlar.

It takes Tim a few beats to realise he's spoken, and a few more to remember what was said. "What's that?"

"What do you get out of this?"

Tim chews his lip, memorialising a few shots as he puts together his answer. "It's... arousing. Knowing you're putting on this act for me; knowing I'm the only one who's allowed to see you like this. I'm the only one you'd let photograph you like this. It's trust, I guess? Like I said, it's a passion project."

Bruce is smirking, just the finest curl in the deep corners of his mouth. He's watching Tim intently; he can feel it. It's hard not to squirm under that gaze.

"Anyone could tell it's a bit more than that," he rumbles, gently accusing.

Tim swallows. His pants feel a tad tight in the front, and he shifts his weight surreptitiously. "Can you touch your chest?"

The lack of breastplate had been another request of Tim's, the under armour stowed for the evening's session. The suit still looks tight where it stretches across Bruce's pectorals, that bat emblem doing nothing to hide the peaks of his nipples where they protrude through.

Bruce's thumb circles one of the buds, hips shifting in their seat. It pulls the muscles of his thighs tight, pulls everything tight, and Tim forgets to breathe for a few moments as he collects a few shots.

His voice comes out husky when he directs, "Can you come like this?"

Bruce's breath whistles through his lips, the only break in the otherwise stoic mask of the Batman. "Possibly. How about you touch yourself behind the camera, and I'll get off to the sight of you enjoying this more than you let on."

Tim's cheeks feel hot when he pulls back to meet Bruce's gaze above the camera. But he wastes no time in sliding a hand past his waistband and palming his eager cock. "Deal."

11,582 / 50,000

Help me reach my goal!

[callioope]

What's this? An update?!

Is anyone else experiencing an onslaught of bots following them? Whenever I see that happen I wonder if it's because I've been so inactive lately; sometimes there seems to be a correlation there. So maybe just maybe it will help if I post something.

So here's an update.

Free time is a rarity for me these days -- offline life is busy! When I do have time to myself, I usually spend it stuck in the YouTube vortex (unfortunately, but it's the honest answer. I go there to watch Critical Role and get sucked sideways by the darn algorithm. I need to sign up for Beacon and just stop having a reason to go to YT in the first place). IF I can pull myself away from that blackhole, then I'm probably also avoiding writing by doing the NYT Games. And if by some miracle I dodge both of these digital traps, then I'm actually (gasp) reading or writing. (Or playing DND on the weekend.)

The Writing I signed up for Get Your Words Out this year, and even if I haven't been as productive as I might have dreamed, I'm still loving it because I do feel like it is working to get me writing more than I otherwise would have. And it doesn't feel as daunting as NaNoWriMo. So, here's my progress:

Pledged as a backpacker (honestly the lowest and easiest goal but I'm being practical about my time availability this year)

Wrote 33 days this year so far

Worked on 11 different projects -- this is a big oof for me; I feel a little adrift. I'm trying to console myself by likening it to an artists sketchbook (I think I saw a post about that on tumblr). Any writing is better than no writing! Nine (nein!) of the projects are shadowgast fics and two are original works -- something I might combine into 1 idea, we'll see. 

I've been focusing on the original idea lately, which is exciting!

I got a new laptop, and I'm able to go back to using Scrivener! Sadly had to pay for the upgrade, and still migrating story notes back into it, but excited. Anyone have any good tips for using it? Character templates, etc?

The Reading I have been able to get back into reading this year, which I am super happy about. This year I've read:

Our Bloody Pearl by D.N. Bryn (loved it)

A Power Unbound (The Last Binding #3) by Freya Marske (loved it)

The Magician's Daughter by H.G. Parry (enjoyed it)

Kaikeyi by Vaishnavi Patel (loved it)

The Bird King by G. Willow Wilson (enjoyed it)

Alif the Unseen by G. Willow Wilson (it was fine)

Uprooted by Naomi Novik (enjoyed it)

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke (it's complicated)

Crown Duel by Sherwood Smith (third read; comfort read)

Remalna's Children by Sherwood Smith (it was fine)

Silver in the Wood (The Greenhollow Duology #1) by Emily Tesh (loved it)

Drowned Country (The Greenhollow Duology #2) by Emily Tesh (loved it)

Every Heart a Doorway (Wayward Children #1) by Seanan McGuire (did not like)

Thornhedge by T. Kingfisher (loved it)

Spellbound (Magic in Manhattan #1) by Allie Therin (disappointed)

Upright Women Wanted by Sarah Gailey (loved it)

Edited to add: Currently reading: The Hexologists (The Hexologists #1) by Josiah Bancroft. Healthy, loving, established middle age couple protagonists in a fantasy setting, where have you been?! I've been looking for a book like this forever.

I haven't read more than like 2 books a year ... probably since 2016 (thank you rebelcaptain and shadowgast for all the wonderful fics i read instead)

[acmoorereadsandwrites]

What I learned writing 500k in sixteen months

Writing daily is a lot easier to do if you are kind to yourself and do not set impossible goals. Some people can do NaNoWriMo every month because their lifestyles permit it. Others can't because of work, responsibilities, health, etc. Set a reasonable goal to start and adjust according to your lifestyle and that's the bare minimum to hit. If it's 50 words, it's 50 words. If it's a 1000, it's a 1000. It's subject to change based on your circumstances.

Accept that you are going to have to edit. I see a lot of people who cannot stand editing; some of them even hope that if their outline is perfect, then they won't have to do a developmental edit and can just make a clean first draft and it's good to go. I'm sorry to say, but if you want to be traditionally published, you're going to have to get in there and be willing to kill your darlings. If you are going to self-pub, it's still probably a good idea to be willing to kill your darlings.

This is pretty linked to number 2: the more you write, the more you nurture a gut instinct. You start to be able to see that something isn't working. Listen to your gut. Do not ignore it. If it's telling you 'this is wrong,' either keep going and accept that you might have a huge rewrite ahead of you or go back and figure out what's wrong and either edit it or save it for later.

I love commas and medium length sentences too much. That's one of my biggest hurdles. I have to actively think about sentence length, sentence structures, and sentence starters. The more you do it, the more naturally it will come to you, but, I'll be real, it's really freaking annoying when you used to be able to write 45 words a minute and now you're chugging along at 15 words a minute because you're too busy going 'this is the third long sentence with a semi-colon in a row!!! NOOOO!'

Learn to walk away. This is a very hard lesson for writers to learn, but it's incredibly important. Sometimes you are not ready for this project right now or it's not ready for you. Maybe it needs more time to marinate, maybe you're not actually interested in it and it was just a shiny idea to avoid working on the real WIP that haunts you and is staring at you as you desperately try to do anything besides write it, or maybe it's just not an idea you can write exactly how you want to write it. It's good and crucial to figure out when a project is going to teach you something and push through anyways, but it's also good to learn when that project isn't viable.

Reading is so important, but not just reading to read. I really recommend getting involved in writing communities and offering to be a beta reader or CP (critique partner) and honing your critiquing skills. Reddit has a BetaReaders, DestructiveReaders, and PubTips subs, there's also Critique Circle and Ladies Who Critique. I've heard stories of people finding betas and CPs here on Tumblr and on Twitter.

Write a variety of things. This is not going to work for every single person, but it's going to work for a lot of people. If you hit a wall and you find that you are repeating yourself, set the project aside and work on something else. Fanfic, a short story, move from romance to a horror, instead of that epic fantasy, write a contemporary novel about a lamp salesman with an absurdist bent. Many authors do this. Crop rotation is one of the ways to keep your creative well full and will let you look at the main work with a more objective eye as well as help you keep bringing new ideas to the table. If the MC keeps getting trapped and keeps getting out of it by being clever, there's a good possibility it might feel repetitive and your reader isn't going to be engaged anymore.

Find people who will be honest with you when a work isn't cutting it. As artists, it's so hard to share our work and our friends and family don't want to hurt our feelings, so you might have to go outside of them for good feedback (if they read in your genre and age category and have similar interests, they might be good for feedback). The truth is, we might now what our weaknesses are, but it's hard for us to know if we're successful in combating them without fresh eyes. We all know a lot about our stories whereas someone who isn't us doesn't. That might feel obvious, but there's a lot of authors who try to publish and nobody has ever seen their work so they don't know why they aren't getting requests for fulls. Open yourself up to the experience of being critiqued.

Recognize when you are avoiding writing. Maybe I'm the only person that is struggling with this, but it hit me only a few days ago exactly what things I do when I am avoiding writing. I play 2048 or Othello online. I'm a creature of habit so maybe it's more specific than it is for others, but by seeing that and recognizing it, I now let myself play one round and if I'm still not writing, I go do something else. If the weather is good, I go for a walk. If it's not, I might exercise inside or turn on some Two Steps from Hell and play a few rounds of a game that lets me zone out. I might even turn to YouTube or Netflix and find either a documentary, a testimonial, or a piece of media from a cultural that isn't mine. I do what I can to either put me in the writing headspace or I do research for my writing. Not every hour of the day has to be productive, but my set-aside writing time needs to be productive to my writing. If another project wants to be started, I will give in and write it so at least something has been written.

I don't just write a story to know what a story is, I also write a story to know what it isn't. This results in me rewriting my chapter one five times until I get to chapter two. This does not work for everyone and can be an active hinderance to perfectionists or people who get stuck in revision loops, but it works for me. I might start a story in space and realize it's not working and then set it in Canada 1949 and then realize that isn't working and put it in a secondary world with elves and then cut the elves. To someone who isn't me, it might look like madness, but I learn my characters' backstories, internal wounds, the way they think, about their families, their backgrounds, etc. very quickly and they solidify in a way that makes it easier for me to channel their voice. And it can change as I move pieces about, of course, and I have to be open to that, but if I know that MC has PTSD because of XYZ before I'm too far in, then I can start working with it ASAP. As such, some writers' advice is just not for me and that's OK.

[solipseismic]

i hope you know that every day i wish i could read your book and really enjoyed reading the nanowrimo tidbits you sent, you should infodump about it 👀

CROW ... this is so so sweet i am kissing u gently on the mouth . also this is great timing bc i am just about to compile a vigilante's guide to knowing when to die into a goog file that i can send to my friend (part of our bargain in me convincing him to do nanowrimo w me this year)

snippet from book 2 for u:

The Rift gave a sudden convulsive shudder. Skysteel felt it all the way to her ankles as it threw her out—and away. She was freefalling before she even knew it, pinwheeling through the air like a shitty paper airplane. Sky-ground-sky-ground-BUILDING passed in a dizzy blur right up until she smacked into a billboard with a comedic sound. She would have laughed, except her lungs seemed to have gone on impromptu strike at the time of impact. It really was a hard-knock life, huh? Black spots swarmed her field of vision. An Avian shrieked at the sight of her and dove, the razor talons of its feet extended fully and bladed wings gleaming in the bright sun. Poltergeist and Eidolon were both yelling something over comms but she couldn’t parse anything—all she could see was the golden light of the Avians surrounding her, all she could feel was the agonizing feeling of the Rift splitting open wider far above her. The golden light of the Avians turned blinding. Skysteel’s secondary eyelids dropped down for a split second. But— That was no fucking Avian. A man shining like a blue sun reached down and gently plucked an Avian off Skysteel’s prone body laying in the ruin of the billboard. One moment his hand closed around its shoulder and the next—it was a still-glowing pile of fine, off-white ash on the ground. “That was stupid,” he said. Skysteel took the hand he offered and heaved herself up out of the pieces of billboard she’d fallen to the ground with. “That’s what I want on my headstone,” she told him, wincing and touching a hand to her ribs.

anyways i rarely talk abt a vigilante's guide (which some of u who have been following for a long time may know under the previous title of "demon city" and / or "demon eyes" and so all the stuff i've posted abt it r under those tags) bc it's like That One Big project for me. like u know how brandon sanderson has the stormlight archive that kind of is the hub / culmination of all his works across the brandonsandersonverse (official term is brandon sanderson's "cosmere")? for me that's vigilante's guide. also it's exceedingly self-indulgent is the other reason.

it's gone through like 50 different iterations bc it's existed in my brain for nearly as long as i can remember (i think over a decade at this point) and the Ira Neda i talk about (my supreme blorbo, if you will) is the protagonist! i have ambitions for it spanning five books with the second (formerly "demon eyes") titled a vigilante's guide to destroying the world but right now books 1 and 2 are existing in the same doc (DEMON MEGADRAFT) because i'm trying to see what gets shaken out of it while i play with a non-linear timeline between the two

as a result, there are a lot of ideas that are getting spun into it (and even more ideas that i've had trial runs of before editing or cutting them entirely) but it's got the run of the mill superhero genre setup: we have a recognizable earth set in the near-ish future / a time that's somewhat similar to our own, we have a bunch of vigilantes running around fighting ordinary crime and supervillains (tho these are mainly just called "terrorists" in-world bc, well.), and different people have different powers from different things (but mostly it's because they're alien / part alien lol)

book one (knowing when to die) follows ira neda's arrival in anehaven, a (fictional) city in new york, where she is trying to unravel the circumstances that led to her twin brother's death several years ago. she promises herself, her family, her friends, and a lot of strangers that she isn't in that vigilante business anymore, if she ever really was: she's retired now. she just wants to live a quiet life (lie) and she doesn't intend to instigate anything (lie) and she is never picking up the mantle again (lie). but anehaven, like ira neda herself, has secrets of its own. the city is alive--and it hungers. people have been disappearing from the streets without a trace for over a year now, more and more with each month that passes. she makes some friends (criminal empress and her two partners in crime as well as ... actual partners), she makes some enemies (her fellow vigilantes) there are three questions now that have no answers: what happens to these people? why does the sidewalk have teeth? and who the FUCK is this other guy calling himself a vigilante?

book two is a little more abstract on account of I Still Haven't Figured out Subplots for it, but it's your stock alien invasion with ensemble cast: here we introduce cori sanchez, the (also) (formerly) retired HUSH, a mirek'ar necromancer; alec iakabos, SOLSTICE, and noah harper, EQUINOX, whom you can think of as "gosh, i really was VERY inspired by wildstorm comics when i was fifteen, huh," if you're familiar with apollo and midnighter from them; along with some familiar faces from the first book--alan and blue wilson (POLTERGEIST and EIDOLON, respectively) and ira neda. names capitalized to make it easier for me to keep track of them lol.

[emmanuellececchi]

nano update... or not

So, yesterday I was pretty bummed. Oh yes, I did 50% of my words count and you could think "hey, that's nice! you're happy, right?"

Truth is? I'm not. Not at all satisfied with what I have written. I began researching information about people with trauma and ptsd and, beside truly interesting and heart breaking information I also read things like :

Don't write people with trauma if you're not ready to meet with with mental health speacialist/trauma survivor

A love interest cannot heal a trauma

Love do not heal magically trauma

and so on.

As my project is about a love story between two peoples who have been wounded by life, particularly one who had survived a traumatic car accident, let me tell you, it let me with a taste of ashes in my mouth. I wanted to throw away my work and just delete all.

I didn't. Why? (this is my thought process not a comdamnation of those remarks and articles I read)

First: healing is a long process. Even being healed leaves traces and scar. So, the magical healing? it's BS. I understand what was being said, but it bypasses the principal of healing in the first place.

Second: I am not writing about a people with trauma. Trauma/ptsd (and those two are not the same) is not the main fact in my story. I write about love and the challenges life can throw at us... I will do my research so that I can describe and feel with relative reliability my character.

Third: in fairy tales, a kiss can revive a princess or break a curse. Although I am not going in this direction with my story, I am still thinking that writing a story were someone's love allow someone in trouble to go over his/her pain is still a beautifull message

Fourth: Even before reading Neil Gaiman answers, I took the decision to go on. I will finish this. Even if it's bad, even it's not realistic. I will do it until the end (which means even after nanowrimo).

Conclusion: Last night allow me to think a lot about my story. What I wanted to put in it, why I wanted to write it. Why I had fun thinking about it. Having being shaken allow me to think my story all over again. I am still not sastisfied and I know I have a lot of work to do. But I know better where I want to go.

Don't let people or notes or remarks read or heard dictate you what you are writing. Don't let the impression you have that your writing is bad stop you from advancing. Each story is a reflect of your heart. Write it. In the way you feel is good.

Courage, friend writer, we got this.