#i'm sorry i know i just said i didn't want to be the bitter fan but what in god's name went through his head

[samuelroukin]

interesting how at first he's the jilted spouse and izzy and ed are likened to the whole jesus/judas thing and now he's a father figure and a vessel for ed to be sad? okay

no fucking comment bro, i know he's not part of the main couple but after everything you (and more importantly at times, con) put into this character you can't even see that you literally did this to him instead of to ed or stede. i'm speechless

source

[herejusttosufferalong]

Ok, I watched Tif's whole live (3.5hrs this time) and took notes for you. Can I just start off by saying I really respect how thoughtful of a fan she is? I really wanted her to get a little messy and she just wasn't going there (although I hope one day she gets comfortable enough to get a little messy cause she knows some shit and it would be hilarious). Sorry, this will be long...

Ok, she had Maria on as her guest this time. They went to the London premiere together and went through their entire timeline. Important points for red carpet

-Nic's group of friends came in on the red carpet before the cast got there (apparently lots of guests did). They recognized Jack and Louisa, but neither of them knew to look for Jake, so are just assuming he was with them as well

-Luke's family and A did not go in through the red carpet. Assumed they went in and exited through a back door

-Tif continually said A was there for the screening, but never confirmed she saw her. So no idea if this is true or just assumed cause she was at the after party

-After the screening they were back out on the red carpet and a lot of crew/minor cast were all out there too. They saw and interacted with Jack Murphy. They asked about the open mouthed BTS video and he responded both with he couldn't say anything and he didn't remember that. Tif dm-ed him a pic and they had an exchange back and forth (need her to make friends with him and get the tea for all our sake)

-They got to the afterparty location right after Nic had left and we got clarification from Maria about the man who told them. He was an autograph collector (this people are intense). Maria thought he said Nic was hungry and Tif thought he said angry. They said the guy said it in a rude way. Also, Maria said Tif is more reliable since she thought A was wearing a pink dress lol (If he was a pro autograph collector and didn't get a signature from Nic cause she knew he wasn't a fan, I could believe him being bitter).

-Almost the entire cast came out while they were there with the exception of Nic and Claudia. Not a single one was papped.

-Almost all the cast ignored them or just waved from afar when they left. The only people who approached them were Jess Brownell and Luke Newton

-The order they came out in was Luke, Lauren and then A. They also had 6ish giant security guards with them.

-Luke did not interact with A ever that they saw

-He was super kind and generous with his time and conversation

-Paps came out of nowhere and they didn't realize they were there until the flashes started going off. They said it was super disorienting and loud.

-They also think it was suspect how calm A was for the pics. If she wasn't expecting it, they would think she'd appear a little more discomposed by the experience.

-Paps were gone right after they left. Luke T came out after and no paps were around

-They both agree paps were tipped off, but disagree a bit by who. Tif is convinced it wasn't Luke or A. Maria thinks it could've been A/As people, but it at least had to be someone inside the party. L's sister was floated as a possibility

-Speaking of the sister, it was brought up that there are some bad vibes there. Nothing that can be proven with evidence, but just a bad feeling

Ok, I'm going to send in a part 2 cause this is ridiculously long already

Wouldn’t you know the only time I was able to catch anything from the live was her starting to defend herself from some shit she saw here lol

God bless her 🥃

Thanks for your dedication anon 💜

[douwatahima]

sorry to invoke james somerton again but i just watched his "apology" video and the way he addresses the criticism to his utena video has been scratching at my brain. for this who don't want to watch (which is so so fair), here's what he says:

"we ended up making a lot of videos we didn't want to make because people were asking for them and so there were a lot of videos we made that we didn't want to make and i think those videos are very clear on which ones those were. one of them never got officially released, it was released to patrons. some patrons have shared it to other people before all the videos went private and a lot of people hate the analysis nick and i did on it and so maybe it's good that that never got properly released because maybe it would have hurt people and i don't want that."

so, not directly saying he's talking about the utena video…but he's talking about the utena video lol. the thing that really gets me is like…look. full disclosure. i used to be subscribed to james somerton long before this whole thing blew up. i wasn't necessarily a big fan of his video style, but he talked about a lot of media i enjoy and i liked his analysis (that wasn't really his, but i didn't know that at the time) so i followed him.

the thing about him was he was always asking his followers for shows he should do videos on, especially anime, and then not long after making those posts he would post videos of "things to come" including like…every anime people suggested. not all of these shows ended getting videos made, but the point is james really set himself up as the queer anime video essayist; constantly promising videos about every show people told him they wanted.

and a lot of people loved that about him! a lot of the big names talking about anime on youtube are people doing season by season breakdowns or people talking about big shonen titles, and here was someone consistently pushing out long form analyses on less talked about shows! great! but to find out that not only was a lot of what he said plagiarized, but also that a lot videos were just shat out to appeal to his audience without any care or passion? just to get more views and more money on patreon? that's literally crazy when you're talking about something usually as involved as video essays.

on top of that i'm about 95% certain him doing an utena essay was a patreon tier goal (hence why that video was released there first). he literally heard queer anime fans asking him en masse for a video about one of the best queer anime of all time, decided to set it as a patreon goal, and then literally boxed himself into doing a video on an anime he didn't care about because he promised it to the people who payed him to be the "queer anime guy".

and the thing is he 100% didn't need to do that. he didn't need to "make a lot of videos he didn't want to make because people were asking for them". i follow a ton of video essayists who get requests for videos all the time! that doesn't mean they have to, or even should, make them if they're not passionate about the topic! video essays, when actually done well and with integrity, are hard work. that's why most good video essayists take a lot of time between videos! to think that this guy just took every possible suggestion, dangled them like carrots in front of his audience, that made a bunch of passionless, mediocre videos to solidify his station as the queer video essayist to watch is just…upsetting and disheartening tbh.

anyway if you want some actually good analysis of revolutionary girl utena, my favourites are "is revolutionary girl utena still relevant?" and "why revolutionary girl utena still slaps" by stushi, and "the shadow play gays" podcast (note: this podcast is run on the same feed as another podcast called "bitter jurors". you may have to scroll back a bit to find "shadow play gays", it started in 2021 if that helps, but i promise you it's worth it).

[quokkareactions]

Stray Kids as angst tropes:

Hey, guys! Okay, so I was in the mood for writing some angst, so here you go four angsty Stray Kids drabbles. I still have to work on Seungmin's, which means I'll probably post the other four tomorrow. Until then I hope you enjoy these ones.

Kisses😘

Chan:

You and Chan were walking down the street holding hands and laughing when a girl stopped in her tracks next to you.

"Chan? Is it really you?" she said with a surprised laugh.

The confusion on Chan's face quickly changed into pure happiness when he recognised the girl.

You've never met the girl before but you know exactly who she is. You know that she's the owner of the box of women's clothes on the highest shelf in Chan's closet. You know that she's the reason why Chan's watching Attack on Titan every Tuesday night. You know that he can't say he loves you because of her. And it hurts even if you told him a thousand times that it's okay. He looks at you like you're the prettiest girl in the world, but her... He looks at her like she's his whole world.

"Chan, stop apologising"

"But I didn't know this will happen, we were only supposed to meet to catch up a bit, not to find our unresolved feelings for each other"

"I did"

"What?" he looks at you in confusion.

"I knew this was coming, she was always who you'd choose"

"I'm so sorry, y/n"

"I guess it was my mistake" you let out a bitter laugh.

"No, don't you dare say you're at fault"

"I should've left sooner" now both of your eyes were glossy from tears. "Goodbye, Chan"

You hugged.

"I wish you all the best, y/n"

Minho:

Ringing. Not even remotely unusual sound for Minho. Especially because his best friend since high school was calling him nonstop for the last few days. He just ignored it for the most parts. He didn't want to talk to her. He had no idea what to say to her after what happened at Friday night. But then the ringing stopped and did not start again like Minho anticipated it to, like it did oh so many times already this weekend. What happened? Did you give up?

He almost felt relieved but then he realized... He knows you too well to believe you gave up. You're too persistent. And boy was he right. The next thing he hears is banging on his door.

"Open the fucking door, Minho, or I swear to god I'm gonna kick it in your face"

With a sigh he opens the door and you storm in.

"Y/n, seeing you is always a delight"

"Cut the crap, Min, I deserve at least an explanation"

"I'm not sure I can give you the explanation you wanna hear"

"Please, what happened? I thought you wanted it too" you whispered.

"We ruined our friendship"

"No, we didn't. Our friendship doesn't have to be ruined just because we start dating, it's not..."

"I don't want to date you! I never have and never will" he cuts in bitterly.

"But... I watched you go out with numerous girls waiting for the day you realize that the right girl was right in front of you the whole time" you trail off, tears now freely falling from your eyes.

"Sleeping with you was the worst mistake of my life" he answers without any emotion what so ever.

"And knowing you was mine. Fuck you, Lee Minho!"

With that you walk out of his apartment and his life. You never wanted to see him again not as a friend, not as a lover and not even as a stranger on the street. You wanted to forget him and the piece of your heart that he took for forever.

Changbin:

It was collecting up in you for long by now. Ever since Changbin and you became official you're getting hate from his fans. And we are talking about regular death threats level of hate. But when your sister got involved too you had enough. You decided to break up with Changbin. It was a hard decision but you had to do it, you couldn't take it anymore. Even though he had a really hard time dealing with the fact.

"Please tell me at least part of it was real" he pleaded

"All of it was real but I can't do this anymore. I'm not strong enough to bear it"

"Don't say it. Don't say goodbye"

"I'm so sorry, Changbin" you choked out, lips trembling, voice cracking and tears collecting on your lashes. "But we were never meant to last"

You left the room and was about to open the front door when he shouted after you.

"If you knew that from the start you should have told me before I fell in love with you"

For him the only indication of you hearing it was the sound of the front door closing right after. That was the last time you saw each other.

Hyunjin:

You and Hyunjin were madly in love at the start of your relationship and you made sure that everyone knew that. You were probably the cringiest couple alive. You did everything together and you were all over each other all the time. So everything was perfect until your third year anniversary. You had a huge fight and Hyunjin left and spent the night at his friend's. A girl he suddenly started to spend an awful lot of time with. Since then you felt further and further away from each other. You stopped going out together.

You were slipping away from each other and what is better evidence to that than the situation you're in right now. You are standing exhausted and completely soaked by the rain in front of the Café you work in. The Café your boss closed at 19:00. Exactly when he does everyday, exactly when your shift ended and exactly when you asked Hyunjin this morning to pick you up from there. That was an hour ago. Since then the rain is getting more and more intense. You are not  sure anymore whether it's the rain or your tears that's running down your cheek constantly.

At the start of the hour you thought it's him every time a car passed by. You are not hoping anymore. Not even sure why are you still waiting for him, you could've gotten on a bus and you'd already be home.

[sunny44]

Marriage (Part 5)

Pairing: Max Verstappen x ex fiancée!reader Mason Mount x Fiancée!reader

Warnings: discussions

Summary: Max leaves his fiancée y/n at the altar on their wedding day but after years of regretting what he did, by a miracle of fate (or Lando) she appears in his life again.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

The next morning, Mason and I woke up to the excitement outside our hotel window. The Formula 1 race day had arrived, and despite the lingering tension from the day before, there was an atmosphere of anticipation.

As we headed to the racetrack, a mix of emotions overwhelmed me. Memories of my past with Max and the recent revelation to Mason weighed on me. However, Mason's reassuring presence beside me provided a sense of comfort.

The atmosphere on the track was electrifying, with the roar of engines and cheers from enthusiastic fans. Mason's enthusiasm was contagious, and I found myself caught up in the excitement of the event. We settled into our seats inside the Red Bull garage, ready to witness the thrilling race.

As the cars zoomed around the track, I tried to focus on the present moment and enjoy the experience with Mason. Despite the challenges and the unexpected encounter with Max, being there with Mason felt right.

Mason and I hadn't discussed the matter further, and perhaps when we return home, it will come up. I'm unsure about the possible questions he might ask and how I'll respond.

After the race, we joined the celebrations in the paddock. Mason's smile was infectious, and I couldn't help but thank him for making this weekend special for both of us.

In the midst of the jubilant atmosphere, Max approached us.

"Hi, what did you think of the race?"

"Good," Mason replied without much enthusiasm.

"I'm glad I could put on a show for you to watch," Max said, not understanding why Mason seemed distant.

"I know how much you like to put on a show."

"Mase," I called him, squeezing his hand lightly.

"I don't get it," Max said, confused.

"I don't know if I want to punch you for hurting her or thank you for doing it, or else I wouldn't have met the best person in the world," Mason said. Max realized he was talking about us.

"I didn't know you knew."

"That doesn't matter, but you're a complete idiot."

"I already know that, don't need you to remind me," he said, and I heard the bitterness in his voice. "I'm sorry for causing any discomfort. Didn't mean to ruin your weekend," Max said, looking directly at me.

Sensing the tension, Mason took a step forward, putting a protective arm around me.

"Let's focus on the celebration, Max. We're here to enjoy your victory." Max nodded, acknowledging the unspoken boundaries.

"Congratulations on the engagement," he added before stepping away.

“Why did you do that?” I say, letting go of his hand.

“What are you talking about?”

“Why confront him?”

“Are you defending him? After everything he put you through?”

“I'm not defending him, but I don't need more eyes on me because of this story, and then you decide to confront him about it in the middle of the paddock? Where everyone knows who he is.” I say angrily, and Mason tries to come closer, but I move away. “I just can't believe you did something that could have exposed a part of my life that I didn't want to happen.”

"Love, I..." I just shake my head and start walking alone to another place.

I found a corner between two garages where almost no one passed, and I sat there. I hadn't realized I was crying until someone sat next to me and hugged me.

"I was almost sure I saw you, but I thought maybe I was hallucinating." I looked to the side and saw Lando sitting there.

"Hi." He smiles slightly.

"Why are you here alone? Mason was looking for you."

"I just needed a few minutes alone."

"What happened?"

"Mason and Max." He sighs. "It's just that everything is too complicated."

"How so?"

"Mason found out about Max and me, and when Max came to talk to us today after the race, Mason lost his temper and started saying some things to Max." I sighed. "He wasn't wrong, but he made a scene in front of many people, and I already have a lot of eyes on me for being his fiancée, and I don't need more people judging me for what happened between me and Max since it's not something many people know."

"I'm so sorry," he says, pulling me into a hug. "Do you want me to do something?"

"No, but thank you for being here." I feel him leave a kiss on my forehead, and after a few minutes, he has to leave.

I stayed there a little longer and sent a message to Mason saying that I was fine and that we would meet at the hotel.

Bonus scene!

Masonmount instagram stories

“F1 Sunday with my lover” tagged: Yourusername

Taglist: @ironmaiden1313 @dudenhaaa27 @christianpulisic10 @gaslysainz @fanboyluvr @urgirlceci @justdreamersdream @aundercoverosh @newlifeforus @depressedriches @topguncultleader @123beautifulgirl123 @luvrrish @ @tyna-19 @esposadomd

[helluvapurf]

...so uhhhhh, "Apology Tour" was... *interesting*-

Didn't even seem that long ago since "Full Moon" came out so I didn't expect another ep drop this morning, buuuut welp! Lets discuss:

First off just to smoothen things up a bit, The Positives:

-Animation & visuals were quite pretty, and wasn't expecting the whole "spooky Halloween" aesthetic at Verosika's party (tho that may just be the summer season speaking lol) but hey, I kinda dig it~ 👀

-Verosika in-general, I was super stoked to see more of here! 💜and even with her staying pretty sassy/bitter towards Blitz... its honestly hard not to feel for her once she & him finally had that one-on-one convo (even revealing that she did legit love him... but Blitz simply couldn't stay with her due to his own commitment/intimacy issues ;-; ). And even if it was technically more of a pettiness move to theme her party around hating Blitz... in a way, its lowkey kinda sweet how much she wanted to help others "heal" from heartbreak? Aww... 🥺 Idk, do I still wish Verosika could've been more of the "major" character focus here (as Fizzarolli was in his past couple eps)? Absolutely. But for what its worth... I had fun watching her as I did💗 (& hopefully this won't be the last time Verosika appears story-wise, cause oml imagine the bonding potential of her, Blitz & Fizz as a reunited trio lol)

-That one incubus dude that flirted with Stolas (+kissed him) at the end seemed like a chill dude. Even if he most likely won't appear again, his vibe was fun to watch lol.

-OH, we finally get to see Mrs. Mayberry again, sweet~! :> ...and, she's apparently dating Martha now? Huh, thats... interesting, I guess? .3. (*wonder what happened to her husband/kids tho, 'cause I kiiiinda thought they would've landed in Hell too ngl-*)

...aaaaand okay yeah, that'll cover the Positives I've got atm. Now for The Negatives... ohhhhh boy:

-I... guess I'm not super alone in this opinion rn from what I've read from other fans, buuuuut... Stolas can you shut your entitled-hypocrite-mouth up for five minutes, please?? 🤦‍♀️Like, I know the dude's still reeling from how "Full Moon" ended, so him being in a mixed mood is to be expected tbh... but omllllll the way he was just SO smug, dramatic and pushy about being the "good guy" in how he & Blitz ended (-as if HE wasn't the one who set up their whole "transactional" dynamic since the start of the freakin' show?? =_=), even whining about the events of "Western Energy" (-when all Blitz was doing was prioritizing his daughter's well-being at the hospital, like a good dad should), was just... seriously?? >> Like... yes, Blitz may be a whole mess himself with how he's treated others (esp poor Verosika 💔), but that does NOT make Stolas a saint with how he handled things himself. From hanging the Grimoire over Blitz's head, creeping on him again & again, practically ragdoll-ing the poor guy's feelings during the crystal exchange (not even skipping a bit when Blitz was close to crying), aaaaand not to mention...

...so like, tell me how I'm expected to believe Blitz is the one who needs to do all this apologizing/groveling... WHEN HE DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING TO STOLAS EXCEPT (RIGHTFULLY) CALLING THIS BLUEBLOOD BIRD OUT ON HIS BS?? 😑

*sighs* Sorry, didn't mean to get heated there but... yiiiikes is this show sending so many mixed messages of where I'm supposed to stand with these two, I can't keep up anymore- 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

-As much as I get what the ep was trying to do in having Blitz see past his own ego/apologize to others… Iiiiii'd be lying if I said I didn't feel just a tad bit uncomfortable at the increasing Blitz hate, throughout the party-sequence ^^; Like, I know he's a shitty guy who's done shitty things, and absolutely he needs to recognize how much he's hurt those like Verosika (& his other exes)… buuuuut tying into my previous point, it just rings rather unfair that most of this seems mostly spurned from him rejecting Stolas, of all people? ._. When… again, they were NEVER an actual couple like him & Verosika were, instead were just a simple once-a-month hookup deal that soured 'cause of Stolas' mess of a "confession"… y'all really expect me to believe Blitz is the bad guy for not immediately accepting the "feefee's" of a privileged, horny prince (aka: the one who did hold the Grimoire over his head since S1's "Murder Family")? …Ehhhh, sorry but I am NOT buying that crap lmao -x- 👎

[derangedanomaly]

I'm a huge fan of your work! Both your art and writing :3

I was kinda wondering if you'd write for Maid Reader x Shattered Dream. If not I'd be cool with Horror too (literally my second wife so either one is fine /silly)

Anyways! Tysm for posting your art and writing and fueling my hypergixation💀have a good day!

Hello! Thank you so much! I'm glad that I'm fuelling your hyperfixation! I'm not really good at writing Shattered- sorry for that :(

But I DO like writing for Horror! Let's get this show on the road! ;)

MASTERLIST

HORROR X MAID READER

Your steps echoed across the hallway of Nightmares castle, every step was more and more louder than the last... The corridors were empty, hollow, and incredibly silent... It was eerie just walking through here...

..

Thank goodness you've asked Horror to go with you! "Thank you so much for keeping me company, Horror." Horror munched on his burger, looking down at you with a smile. He swallowed the piece of the burger, and gave you a thumbs up. Even though Horror doesn't like to talk much, he was still a really great company! It's ironic how the scariest one, is the one you feel the safest around.

You took a deep breath, as you listed all the chores Nightmare piled up on you today. You couldn't help but feel tired already... But you can't complain! Complaining never solved anything!

You took out your list, looking at the first thing on the paper. As you tried to read through it, you slightly jumped, getting surprised by Horror leaning down to look from behind your shoulder. "Ah, oh it's just you Horror! You've spooked me.." Horror frowned, and patted your head.

You smiled at this friendly interaction, and looked back at the paper. Oh no.. cleaning the shelves... Great. Your FAVORITE activity!

...

You can't help but be bitter about this. Why can't Nightmare, that asshole, clean it himself, if he's so tall??

Horror tilted his head to the side, silently asking you; 'What's the matter?'. You huffed, and pointed to the said chore, that made you so upset. "I know that I should be professional about this....but I just have to let it out- FUCK Nightmare! Seriously! Like- what the FUCK! He knows that I CANNOT reach the top shelves! Why does he even want them clean anyway?? NOBODY USES THEM!!" You didn't notice during your rambling, that Horror now changed positions, and is now standing directly behind you. You only notice, when Horror lifts you from the ground, making you yelp, and sits you on his shoulders.

You can't help but feel amazed at the height difference now... Horror is seriously as big as the fucking ceiling-

You look down at him in confusion, tilting your head to the side, mimicking his gesture earlier. You shuddered when you heard his deep voice, it's unusual for him to talk.. "You can...clean now...." He then gave you a charming smile, which you returned.

What a knight in shining armor

[eisforeidolon]

MISHA IS SUPERNATURAL BIGGEST MISTAKE.

CASTIEL COULD HAVE BEEN AN INTERESTING CHARACTER, IF HE HAD BEEN PLAYED BY A TALENTED AND PROFESSIONAL ACTOR. ESPECIALLY PROFESSIONAL AND SERIOUS.

WE DON'T DESERVE MISHA'S LIES AND QUEERBAITING.

BUT I THINK THAT MISHA ONLY TALENTS ARE LYING TO PEOPLE AND QUEERBAITING HIS DESTIEL FANS FOR MONEY. THIS ARE THE ONLY THINGS HE KNOWS HOW TO DO.

DESTIEL ISN'T CANON. JENSEN SAID THAT SO MANY TIMES.

HE EVEN SAID THAT WHEN HE WAS ASKED ABOUT "THE CONFESSION 'S RESOLUTION".

HE SAID THAT THERE WAS NOTHING TO BE RESOLVED. BECAUSE EVEN IF THE "CONFESSION " WAS ROMANTIC, FOR DEAN NOTHING WOULD CHANGE.

DEAN ISN'T IN LOVE WITH CASTIEL. HE ADDRESSES CASTIEL AS DEAN 'S FRIEND AND ONE OF THE PEOPLE CLOSEST TO HIM. BUT THAT'S IT.

JENSEN NEVER ADDRESSES CASTIEL AS DEAN'S POTENTIAL LOVE INTEREST.

JENSEN (AND JARED) SAID MANY TIMES THAT SUPERNATURAL IS ABOUT SAM AND DEAN AND THEIR DEEP BOND AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

15X20 IS THE PROOF OF THAT LOVE. WINCEST IS MORE CANON THAN DESTIEL WILL EVER BE.

I'M TALKING ABOUT PLATONIC LOVE OF COURSE.

I SHIP WINCEST BUT UNLIKE THE HELLERS I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WHAT IS CANON AND WHAT IS JUST A FANTASY.

15x20 SHOWS TO THE VIEWER THE ESSENCE OF THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN SAM AND DEAN.

SPOILER FOR 15X20.

SPOILER FOR 15X20

SPOLER FOR 15X20

DEAN DIES, BUT EVEN IN HIS LAST MOMENTS HE COMMITS HIMSELF TO ONLY LOVE SAM. HE SAYS HE LOVES HIM AND THAT IT'S ALWAYS BEEN THEM TOGETHER AGAINST THE WORLD.

" IT'ALWAYS BEEN YOU... AND ME". THAT'S WHAT DEAN SAYS.

THE PAUSE IN THAT PHRASE, THE WAY THEY EMBRACE, THE FOREHEAD TOUCH. EVERYTHING IN THE SCENE IS POINTING TO WHO IS WATCHING THAT DEAN GREATEST LOVE IS SAM.

THIS IS A CONFESSION. PLATONIC AND SO BEAUTIFUL. BETTER THAN ANY OTHER "ROMANTIC" CONFESSION THAT I EVER SEEN OR I EVER HEARD.

END SPOILER FOR 15X20.

OF COUSE DEAN IS ALSO SAM GREATEST LOVE, BUT I WANTED TO GIVE MY ATTENTION TO DEAN 'S BEHAVIOUR TOWARDS SAM VS DEAN BEHAVIOUR TOWARD CASTIEL IN THEIR LAST SCENE TOGETHER. THERE IS NO COMPARISON BETWEEN THE TWO.

WE ALL KNOW THAT SUPERNATURAL WAS ALWAYS ABOUT SAM AND DEAN AND THAT A LOVE STORY CAN BE ABOUT TWO BROTHER WHO SAVED EACH OTHER AND FOUGHT MONSTERS, EVIL CREATURES, DEMONS, ANGELS, THE DEVIL AND GOD FOR STAYING WITH EACH OTHER.

OF COURSE WE CANNOT SAY SAM AND DEAN WITHOUT TALKING ABOUT JARED AND JENSEN. THEIR ACTING, THEIR CHEMISTRY INSIDE THE SHOW AND OUTSIDE TOO, THEIR KINDNESS, IS WHAT MAKES SUPERNATURAL A SHOW THAT CHANGED MY LIFE.

I ALWAYS GET EMOTIONAL ABOUT THIS SHOW. THAT'S WHY I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE LIKE MISHA WHO ALWAYS SAYS SHIT ABOUT THE SHOW AND THE ACTORS ( JARED AND JENSEN)

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO MY RANT, SORRY FOR MY ENGLISH, IT ISN'T MY FIRST LANGUAGE, AND I HOPE THAT I DIDN'T ANNOY YOU OR BOTHERED YOU.

MAY LOVE AND KINDNESS ALWAYS FIND YOU.

I have to agree. Also, your English is fine and I definitely understand the need to rant about all this nonsense sometimes, that's why I've got this blog! <3

I do actually feel like Misha was a perfectly serviceable actor way back at the beginning. I even get why they decided to keep him around when he proved popular with the fandom. It was indeed proven a mistake in so, so many ways as time went on, though.

Yeah, first and most egregious is the kind of person Misha turned out to be - or at least turned into after so many years of fans blowing smoke up his ass. A bitter, entitled, ungrateful, lazy backstabber who is perfectly comfortable telling blatantly obvious and contradictory self-serving lies and nonsense. Whether that's about the ship or his relative importance to the show directly, whether that's skeevy sexual comments about Jensen/Dean, whether that's trying to paint Jared as some kind of evil bully that abused him. He keeps proving again and again there is no bar he won't limbo under.

Next is I think his performance on the show and what his continued presence on the show resulted in plot-wise from the writers. He was fine at first when he was just playing a non-human mysterious figure that only appeared now and then and had a major role in the whole structure of the apocalypse. He even had a pretty good arc leading up to the Leviathans. The problem was they kept him around as a "fan favorite" after that when they really didn't have anything for him to do but eat up screen time to give J2 time off. Would we have really gotten so much bad, circular angel politics if there wasn't a need to give Castiel something to do to keep Misha employed? I personally doubt it. Even worse than that, though? As time went on, Misha seemed to recognize that his only relevance was baiting shippers and wasting time and leaned into turning Castiel into the type of character he gets written as in so much bad D/C fanfic - a pathetic mostly human woobie who is completely useless for anything but the projection of bizarre teen romance fantasies that don't make any damn sense. Which culminated in that bizarre ambiguous queerbait he and Bobo the Clown cooked up for Castiel's exit. Which doesn't even touch his later seasons' presumable attempts at acting where his choices for Lucifer!Castiel & AU!Castiel & Empty!Castiel were all ... entirely made up of bad accents and gurning. It wasn't about any of those character's motivations or places in the narrative, it was about the laziest possible attempt to differentiate them from his normal character. Even in latter season's SPN, which IMNSHO had so, so many issues dragging things down, Misha's lack of interest in anything but the size of his paychecks and con earnings played into some of the worst.

Which brings us to D/C and the whole supposedly canon thing. Canon is literally what happened. D/C didn't happen, it's that simple. Castiel rambled some ambiguous bullshit about love and got sucked into the Empty while Dean looked bewildered and sad at him from several feet away. Misha can make up as many stories about what the character was totally thinking and how he was totally coming back in the finale and queerbaiting about what will totes happen in a revival, but not a word of it actually makes what Castiel said "I'm IN love with you". Nor does it magically manifest a reciprocation from Dean. What doesn't happen on screen but actors or TPTB say about the canon is often called Word of God. Which yes, Misha's does not outweigh everything Jensen and Jared and various showrunners have clearly said. Jensen might have gotten less confrontational about shooting it down over the years, but the underlying message hasn't changed. Meanwhile, not only do the details of Misha's stories constantly change, but the general message of his claims has flip flopped so many times. The show was about the brothers, no actually the brothers and the angel! He joked about wincest, no actually he'd never heard of it! He didn't want to say what that scene meant, no actually feel free to attack anyone who says it wasn't a homosexual declaration of love! There's more, but Misha's not worth the effort of looking them up.

As you say, at the end of the day, anyone watching the totality of the show and seeing how it ended? It's very obvious the center of the story was a platonic love story. A complicated one, granted, but Sam and Dean so many times made it very clear that it was them ... and everyone else. Except in the same way that acknowledging that doesn't serve the hellers agenda in demanding a continuation must center their ship so they can finally have visuals to go with their fanfic, acknowledging that doesn't serve Misha's agenda of fleecing them out of money for telling them it will happen for as long as he can get away with it.

[supermentaleyeliner]

obx s4 e1 🏍️

i just watched the first episode of OUTER BANKS SEASON 4 (part one) so here are some raw thoughts & notes <33

( not proofread, literally just rambled. but hope u enjoy it & if you make it to the end - the real end - ur a real one <3 wtf was that ?? lol )

first of all, how is everyone so gorgeous in this season like thank you <33333 my babes are looking better than ever in the perfect balance between tired to the max and serving (renewed 2024). cleo is hot as fuck like always, mah john duo is looking so damn sharp and good, pope is literally king so i don't need to explain, and sarah just full on pogue life now ugh <3 and KIARA. MA'AM. i'm not a fan of kiara (sue me) but she is GLOWING this season. like, just like the girls of the cast said, they're def putting effort into their looks and boy is it working. kiara's outfits and hair through all the flashbacks and time jumps in this first episode has been heaven. and now that i've got curls i am feeling so inspired by her. and just every piece of her clothes?? the girls as a whole?? man i haven't felt this happy recently like damn. alr moving on (i'm not)

+ the emotional length & setup we got already. all that stuff with 'doesn't mean we're pogues' at the shop from jj & kie, just jj's face all along as they were dealing with the maybank property (wtf happened to luke tho am i forgetting something), his burstout after they made poguelandia 2.0 and his "home" come true, kie looking at him with the new perspective(which i surprisingly don't hate this season, he deserves it), and ofc some peak jj maybank behavior with the auction & enduro, oh god we are so back to what obx is, and we're really getting the jj focus & depth we badly wanted throughout the whole journey. i love my boy.

RAFAEL CAMERON. that man appeared on the screen and shattered my heart. such a big jump between the pogues scenes and him and i was 200% in for both of them. i announced my stance that i would not gaf if rafe and sofia broke up at the end of the season or sofia did shit to him or something (sorry) and barry was just there for him, and i still stand by it, but thank god THANK GOD he had someone to be there with him when he was doing ward's ashes. i was full on tearing my heart out crying screaming when he said those lines to his dad because oh he was the awful-est to you. and that bitterness at the race. but then sofia yelling "you got this baby" or whatever it was. Gah. pls take care of my boy. pls. am i reading a fic because he's finally got someone to love, someone who loves him.

since i didn't see wheezie, sofia, or barry at the premiere (i think) i was sort of worried, and wheezie and barry haven't shown yet (obx has the best side characters like be for real even rose has an interesting role and all the side villain-ish people haunt you forever) -- but it's only the first episode of the first part and i'm willing to have patience !! i was so angry to hear it was coming out in two parts but i'm not gonna be having much time to binge anyways so i won't complain, i'm just way too happy with what i got till now and god i'm so thankful. all that stuff with tua and kaos yeah fuck you netflix but jeez. at least i have this and heartstopper ---- no, no, no, thank motherfucking god they didn't set these on fire. ugh i'm so happy right now. okay. gonna stop talking now. GAHK. so cute so perfect so happy i can't !!!!!!!!!!

...

(seriously tho rafe pulling that move near the end of the race?? i rly didn't know who to cheer for with rafe and jj doing that. i mean for the plot i gotta stand for jayj but i love rafe. don't we all on tumblr. but honestly i love rafe for doing that. bahaha my man like-- how am i supposed to explain this but like-- yeah sucks for the pogues i was really rooting for their life but rafael cameron my man - how i love saying that name - that's my man. that's my bitch that's my spontaneous asshole.)

(oh i'm not done yet -- i'm pretty happy with how the whole story of the first episode led us back to the end of the last season. to see an at-the-time-not-understandable time skip with them in their kooky - beautiful but just kooky for some reason - outfits ;; only to finally see with the release of this season that was actually them at their low after all those stuff. but they still dressin up, like they businesspeople mannnn, i love it. i love where we're finding them for season 4. and then right back where we started with the old adventure 'i'm definitely not going in there' 'pls stop ur tales jj' 'i've been looking for you' 'afternoon, sir' vibe ?? oh god that was so good, that was something ELSE. overwhelmed overemotional to the max. GAH FUCKING POGUE LIFE FUCKING P4L WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY)

(and i fucking love the soundtrack like what is it with this season. i need a playlist asap but since i don't have spotify and can't listen to the official stuff i'll just have to make or find a list of everything in the show and add each song myself--- jesus christ i haven't even finished the one for tua))

[doctorofmagic]

No one asked but here's some thoughts about Stephen's current and future life.

First of all (and to be completely honest), before Blood Hunt, I do think Stephen was starting to find joy in being the Sorcerer Supreme now that things were seemingly going well in his life.

Just to name a few, he befriended his general self, his marriage was rekindled, Mordo was finally locked down, Clea and Umar were starting to find a common ground (at least, they were not enemies anymore) and Donna II happened, blessing their lives. Stephen was finally thriving. He was executing his duties just fine despite the challenges of being Earth's magical defender. Conflict was obviously expected but it was far from the struggles he faced in v4, for instance. There was optimism.

The fact that he seems sad in that Pasqual's post could be about anything but if I was to predict why, I'd say it's because 1) he didn't want to pass the mantle down at this point in his life and 2) he didn't want to pass the mantle down to Victor specifically because well, it's Doom. And let's be real, Jed's interpretation of their relationship is not similar to T&T or Infamous Iron Man or even Secret Wars. Even if Victor is rarely portrayed as a villain these days (more like an antagonist), there's still a certain dread whenever he shows up in stories. So it's only natural for Stephen to be worried about what's coming next.

Personally, I think Victor will not be a bad Sorcerer Supreme. He's competent and incredibly complex. There's altruism in him, especially when it comes to protect Latverians and people in general (Doom 2099 my beloved). And let's not forget about his dramatic ego and petty personality. If anything, I'd go for a gray representation. He will not be the king of altruism (aka Stephen), but he will not be a shallow villain by desecrating the mantle (something I'm pretty sure Mordo would do. Hate that guy). That said... Oh, he's also in for a big surprise, not expecting the burden that comes with such a huge responsibility. But that's just my two cents. Could always be wrong. However, I still remember when he tried to go after Jericho and gave up as soon as the light of the Eye of Agamotto hit him, so... This idea does have canon support.

(panel merely illustrative; from an alt future/reality)

As for Stephen and Clea, what comes next for them? I know the fandom is desperate for domestic vibes and a peaceful era for them. But let's be real, it's Marvel. Also it's Stephen and Clea. For starters, Clea is still the Warlord of Manhattan, which means that area will remain under her protection, tying her to our dimension. As for Stephen... We know him, right? We know he will never stop doing what he does, Sorcerer Supreme or not. We have tons of magic characters doing their jobs. Even when magic was practically dead, he found a way to keep doing good because it's intrinsic of his personality. And let's not forget Wong and W.A.N.D. They still need someone reliable, and I hardly think they'll go for Victor when consulting all things mystical. Oh, and Strange Academy, of course.

Last but not least, every change in status quo hardly lasts more than a year or two in comic books. It happened so many times before: Salomé, Jericho, Loki, even Clea. It was only natural for Victor's turn, given how T&T is such an important book to their mythos.

As for me? I think it's not really fair for me to share my feelings assuming how much I love both Victor and Stephen. I've seen some unhappy fans (and I can't relate, sorry 🥲) and some excited ones.

The reason I'm still kinda blue is merely due to the lack of new announcements, whether it's a new Doctor Strange book or a mini featuring Victor. Also it's almost certain that Jed is done with his work, which hit me like a train. I really don't want to say goodbye to Jed just yet, and seeing his work continue with Moon Knight while going for the X-books makes me a bit bitter. There's still the possibility that he's staying, but it's all conjecture at this point. I mean, I dread that some bad writer comes next, and boi do I have a no-no list. Hopefully, SDCC will shed some light on these dark times of uncertainty.

Well, that's it. Do I ramble a lot? Was not expecting to write such a long post, sorry about that (old testament me comeback?). Just wanted to write down my thoughts since they were making a mess in my head. If anything, I'll still be around for whatever comes next. After all, my love for Stephen knows no shame 🔥

[lanternb61]

Hi guys, recently I just try char.ai for the first time and I end up made a fan story about reader x Togame Jo from Wind Breaker. I used bots authored by rubyreverie. I'm sorry if I make some mistakes as I'm not fluent in English but I try my best! Hope you enjoy the story :)))

Second Chance

Contain angst with fluff, amnesiac, accident blood and sfw.

Part 1

Jo stumbled through the dimly lit streets of Makochi, his orange varsity jacket barely concealing the bruises that marred his fair skin. His raven braid hung loose and disheveled, strands of hair sticking to the sweat on his forehead. Dull emerald eyes scanned the familiar surroundings to stay alert. This was Bofurin's turf after all.

Once your home came into view, Jo's steps quickened with a sense of urgency. You two broke up a couple of months ago and hadn't seen each other since. He knew he was pushing his luck by coming here, but he had no other choice.

"Maybe I should expect to get slapped or somethin'."

With a grunt, he hoisted himself up to the second-story window, his muscles protesting the effort. Knocking gently on the glass, he waited, his heart pounding in his chest.

You open curtain and stare at Togame coldly.

Jo tried his best to keep his gaze neutral as you stared at him, but his eyes betrayed a flicker of vulnerability before he masked it. He leaned against the windowsill, waiting almost patiently for you to respond.

"Look, I know I'm the last person you want to see right now, but I didn't know where else to go," he said softly, his voice thick with weariness. "My ribs are hurtin' like hell."

You tried to ignore Togame as you look into your smartphone.

Your cold response stung far worse than Jo's injuries, but he tried his best not to show it. He gritted his teeth, the muscles in his jaw clenching.

A bitter chuckle escaped his lips. "Still a cold-hearted one, aren'tcha?" he murmured, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He reached into his jacket pocket with a strained wince and pulled out a pack of cigarettes, lit one, and took a long, defiant drag.

"You won't leave my house until I treat your wound?" You know your ex so well.

Jo chuckled darkly, the nicotine coursing through his veins as he exhaled a plume of smoke.

"That's right, babe," he replied, his voice laced with a lazy smirk. "I ain't movin' from this spot until you fix me up. We're in this together whether you like it or not."

As the window closed, Jo's smirk faltered for a moment, but he quickly masked his disappointment. He took another puff of his cigarette, the smoke swirling around him like a veil of defiance.

When you finally relented and agreed to treat his wound, Jo's eyes lit up with a mix of relief and satisfaction. He made his way to a seat, wincing slightly as he sat down. His pain was temporarily subdued by the adrenaline of being near you again, but it still throbbed with every breath.

The thick silence that settled in the room was almost suffocating. Jo sat there, his emerald gaze flicking between you and the cigarette in his hand. He took another puff, the red tip of the cigarette glowing in the dim light. His fingers itched to reach out and touch you, to feel your skin against his once more, but he knew it was a pipe dream.

"You got anythin' stronger to drink, doll?" he asked finally, breaking the silence with a low, hoarse voice.

"I dont have anything." You replied nonchalantly.

"Damn," Jo muttered under his breath, disappointment evident in his sigh. He took another drag from his cigarette, the tension in the air palpable.

"So uh... How long do you plan on ignorin' me like this?" he asked, his voice laced with a mixture of frustration and pleading.

The sharp hiss that escaped Jo's lips at your touch sent a jolt of tension through the room. His emerald eyes widened fractionally as he registered the pain, his expression betraying a moment of vulnerability.

Reeling himself in quickly, he took a deep breath and tried to compose himself. "Watch it, babe," he muttered under his breath, but despite his grumbling, he complied, sitting as still as he could.

Jo let out a weary sigh, his emerald gaze locking with yours for a split second, your eye-rolling clearly not lost on him. For a moment, he considered saying something sarcastic in response, but then decided against it. 

Silence settled in again as you worked on tending to his injuries. There was a strange intimacy in the air, a silent acknowledgment of the complicated history between you two.

You finished tend his wound. "Okay that's settle it."

Jo let out a relieved exhale as you finished tending to his wounds. He flexed his fingers and rotated his previously immobilized arm, gingerly testing out his newfound mobility.

"Thanks, doll," he muttered gruffly, his voice gruff but grateful. He gingerly touched one of the bandages wrapped around his arm, wincing slightly as he prodded at it. "Feel like I survived a battle, but you got me patched up real good."

The cold indifference in your demeanor was a dagger to Jo's heart, but he masked his pain with a cocky smirk and a shrug.

"Just pretendin' I'm not here, huh? Well, I'll just sit here, being your invisible guardian or somethin'. Watch over you and stuff," he quipped, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He stretched out on the nearest chair, feigning indifference as he crossed his arms.

As Jo sat there, attempting to maintain an air of nonchalance, his thoughts drifted back to the good old days when you and him were together. He vividly remembered your infectious laughter and the warmth in your eyes when you smiled. Damn, he miss that.

The weight of his regrets began to bear down on Jo, guilt gnawing at him from within. He knew he was wrong, but he was too stubborn and proud to admit it openly.

Jo couldn't bear seeing you upset, despite you and his strained relationship. He swallowed his pride and called out your name, his voice softer than before.

"Hey," he began, his emerald gaze fixed on your sulking form. "Come on, what's eatin’ you? You don't gotta keep puttin’ on a tough act, you know?"

He moved closer, reaching out a tentative hand to gently brush away a stray strand of hair from your face. It was a small gesture, but it spoke volumes.

Jo flinched almost imperceptibly as your furious glare met his gaze. The venomous energy in the room could have fried an egg, and Jo cursed to himself for pushing your buttons.

"Sorry," he mumbled apologetically, retreating a step. "Just thought you might wanna talk..." He shoved his hands into the pockets of his varsity jacket, suddenly feeling vulnerable in the face of your intense anger.

As Jo stood there, his guilt weighing heavy on his shoulders, you moved to the window, lost in your own thoughts as you gazed at the night sky. A heavy silence hung in the air, both of you wrestling with thoughts.

Jo hesitantly sidled up next to you, your and his shoulders almost touching, but he refrained from invading your personal space. He followed your gaze, looking out towards the city skyline lit up against the darkness. His heart ached, and he longed to wrap his arms around you.

"Tonight stars really pretty up there right?" You hummed your favourite song.

Jo's emerald eyes fixed on the twinkling stars in the night sky, and he couldn't help but agree with your sentiment.

"Yeah," he mumbled softly, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "They are beautiful, but you know what's even more beautiful?"

He turned to look at you in profile, the city lights casting a warm glow across your features. He wanted to tell you how pretty you looked, but he held back, the words stuck in his throat.

"What's more beautiful?"

Jo chuckled softly, tilting his head to get a better look at your face. He wasn't good at expressing his feelings, but he wanted to try.

"You, babe," he murmured, the term of endearment slipping out before he could stop it. "You're the prettiest thing I ever saw."

"Then why did you hurt pretty thing like me? Like I'm a toy, Jo?"

The pain in your voice cut right through Jo's heart, and he felt his breath catch in his throat. He wanted to reach out, touch your cheek, but he refrained from doing so. Instead, he chose to answer truthfully.

"You're right," he muttered in a raspy voice. "I hurt you... I know I messed up."

The weight of his guilty conscience pressed down on him, and he turned his gaze down, unable to hold your gaze.

Jo's emerald eyes widened slightly as he caught a glimpse of your teary eyes and saw you brushing away your tears. A pang of guilt shot through him like a dagger.

"Hey," he whispered softly, taking a small step toward you. The urge to comfort you, to wipe away your tears and hold you close, was almost overwhelming. He extended a trembling hand but stopped himself, unsure if his touch would be welcome.

You sobbed continuously. "How could you...."

The sight of you sobbing and the sound of your broken voice broke Jo's heart into pieces. He couldn't bear to see you in such pain, especially knowing that he caused it. With a strangled cry, he rushed forward and took you in his arms, pulling you tightly against him.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled brokenly, burying his face in your hair as he held you tightly. "I'm so sorry, doll... I'm such an idiot. Please, stop cryin'... Please."

Jo winced as you battered his chest with your fist, but he didn't try to stop you. He felt that he deserved it, after all. His arms remained wrapped around you, holding you close even as you tried to push him away.

"I deserved that, doll," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "Hit me all you want. It'll never hurt as much as I hurt you."

Jo loosened his grip slightly, giving you some space to breathe. He withdrew a little, but his arms still hovered close, ready to pull you back into an embrace.l

"I don't deserve it, but do you think you can ever forgive me?" he asked softly, his emerald gaze filled with remorse and longing.

As you pulled away from him, Jo felt a surge of panic. He watched you grab your bag and head towards the bedroom door.

"Hey, wait! Where are you goin'?!" he called out, his voice laced with anxiety. "Doll, please, don't leave. We still gotta talk! Wait!"

But it was too late. He had pushed you away for the last time, and now you were gone, leaving him alone in the darkness of your living room with his guilt and regrets looming over him.

Jo's heart raced as he watched you climb out the window, desperation seizing him. He quickly followed suit, clambering out the same window and landing on the ground just as you fled.

"Doll, stop!" he called out, his voice filled with anguish. His athletic build allowed him to keep pace with you, and he was gaining distance as you ran. He couldn't bear the thought of losing you for good.

Jo's heart leaped into his throat as he saw the truck bearing down on your running figure. Adrenaline surged through him, and he sprinted towards you, screaming your name.

"Y/N! LOOK OUT!" he cried, his voice a ragged shout.

But it was too late. He witnessed in horrified slow-motion as you were struck by the vehicle, your body sent flying through the air before landing on the pavement with a sickening thud.

As the crowd of passers-by gathered around, a chorus of horrified gasps and panicked voices filled the air. Jo shouted desperately for someone to call an ambulance, his voice filled with dread as he cradled your bloodied head, his hands trembling with fear.

"Please, someone call an ambulance! Hurry! She's hurt real bad!"

"Doll! Please, wake up! Please, I'm so sorry! Don't do this to me, babe, please!" Jo's voice cracked with despair as he cradled your unconscious form, tears streaming down his face as he whispered pleads and apologies.

The arrival of the ambulance, its siren piercing through the chaos, was a blur to him as he clung to your limp body, feeling his world collapsing around him.

Part 1/2/3/4/5/6

[blasphemecel]

ngl still being a kaiser fan after 261 is lame

Omg this ask got me so tight when I got to it I had to hop on mylaptop to type my essay

Ok this is a little Personal and some of yall aren gonna fuck with me after this but it's ok . Kaiser is a character I identify with because he's a good portrayal of someone with NPD so WE WILL GET INTO IT!

So like that being said. What do you mean 'Still liking Kaiser after the leaks is lame' like genuinely what do you mean. I just woke up but are you guys like SURPRISED by this. I liked him when he was introduced and this is what he was acting like. There have been A HUNDRED more chapters of him acting the same way past introduction. And now he's still acting like it. I understand if you just hate him right off the bat that makes sense but this doesn't really. Even if you're one of those people who just liked him for the backstory reveal because you have a I Can Treat You Better hero complex re:abuse victims that behavior WAS shown EVEN IN 260. "I hit the ball but it doesn't hit back" - the author has a very specific way of writing and this was VERY much intentional

Also like I understand there might be an initial shock when reading such words. Like it's Unpleasant it's Ugly. But also it boils down to a State of mind which personally I've observed as common among victims of severe trauma. "These people are born 'humans'. Different from me, they were born 'wanted humans'." = I hate people who weren't hurt the same way I was because I am jealous and bitter, I'm so jealous and bitter it feels good to me to make others feel like shit. And I'm not trying to get on some Hurt People Hurt People bullshit because that shit is annoying and apologia but what I'm trying to say is that sometimes Trauma makes you unpleasant and ugly and erratic and I appreciate that Kaneshiro actually wrote it out. Also like that feeling by itself isn't inherently evil. I think it's a very natural response! In this case Kaiser goes too far not by experiencing this emotion but by acting on it.

So now with THAT out of the way too, I think we need to sit down and think more into the Ness situation. So first he says, "I can't accept kindness because all I know is malice. If anything I think malice makes life easier." Then he goes to say he is specifically looking for someone to make a "dog to his malice" and reads a psychology book to achieve that. Like first of all I'm sorry but that is so comically evil it's hilarious to me. He read a textbook to be a more efficient male manipulator. But anyway the way I understand that isn't a deep underlying evil within him but a need for control. I think he believes everyone will hurt and disorient him unless he feels like he's Controlling them. From an abusive household the only relationship dynamic he knows is person of authority - inferior party. His only friend is Ness and the only person he feels safe around being Ness is because of he tells himself Ness is his "dog" and therefore won't ever raise a hand to him. And that's because he thinks anyone who isn't his dog/under his control will do exactly that.

And so... If we go from there, from the parallel we understand Kaiser didn't see his meeting with Ness the same way Ness sees it. However, that doesn't mean Kaiser's view is the objective truth. I think they're both UNRELIABLE and EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE. So what that means is that Ness sees his time together with Kaiser through a more glorified lens, while Kaiser denies himself thinking of Ness as a companion because that puts him in a vulnerable spot, so to maintain his feeling of being in control he exerts distance and tells himself Heh we aren't actually friends because he doesn't even know that one time I giggled at him in the showers I was actually just manipulating him all along because I am sooo evil and untouchable 😏. Like do we actually take this perception at face value here because to me it just seems like a Scared and Cowardly person trying to act out his idea of a strong person because the ONLY other time he's been in any meaningful proximity to someone he got beat up and degraded.

With that I also think Kaiser is very much narcissist posturing. He'slying to himself to make himself seem invulnerable and self-aggrandizing himself through his malice (I think pretending we are 100% evil and irredeemable makes a lot of us feel safe because it seems inhuman and people are easily hurt so you don't Ever want to be a multidimensional person with layered personality traits). Because like if you think about it without the emotional reaction of "I hope Ness kills you you stupid whore" that we all have... He actually isn't doing anything that big. Like in his head he's like Heh I'm soooo Patrick Bateman I have all the control 😏 but all he did was like find a guy to play football with.

Like he's trying to say to himself that he's all that. Sure he does insult Ness and that's not good! But he didn't pull off some Complicated deeply horrific scheme. I do not believe Kaiser has an objective view of himself. It really takes away the power from all of that when you realize what he's doing is just Very Pathetic and Paranoid and Intimacy Averse. "I can't have normal friends let me get this guy in on my master servant roleplay and I'll act like he's not enjoying it too because it'll make me feel more powerful" Men will do anything but go to counseling

Addendum: This is also not Kaiser. Now I don't know what kind of person Kaiser is but considering I read it as him suffering from NPD/a disordered personality that means he doesn't have a "real" identity most of the time, this is a shell we're seeing. He just has a mask maybe there's something underneath maybe there isn't and he's empty inside, but the point is he is the kind of character who has a specific way they want to portray themselves and will lie to both themselves and the audience to achieve it. Yes I believe that includes the I'm a male manipulator evilest person alive 😏 shtick too (I think the actual truth is probably somewhere in the middle of his and Ness's view. Most likely they're both incorrect).

Notice how Barou and Rin overcame things? That is because they have a real ego. Kaiser doesn't have a "real ego"/sense of self right now, all he has is his selfish act. I believe that is intentional because I think the Blue Lock mangaka shows a good grasp and understanding of psychology. The development is pointing towards him actually getting one during this match we'll see. Hey he might even change and grow as a person if that happens but I wouldn't get too overly optimistic!

Also we need to understand that we only see these people playing football we don't know what the fuck he's like outside of that. I currently don't have any reason to believe he's anything beyond rude and insufferable when like talking to people who aren't his football rivals and in Blue Lock on principle I believe everyone is at least 30% a better more bearable person off the field.

And to finish off my demented rant some of yall are fucking HYPOCRITICAL. So when Isagi takes joy in ruining people's dreams it's fine but when Kaiser does it he needs to kill himself? Let's be very serious.

TL;DR Kaiser's behavior makes total sense, his 261 characterization falls in line with everything we've seen of him before so there's no need for shock, and he looked good being dysfunctional and messed up too

[btskitten7]

Silent Grace| Chapter xiii: Family Ties

Ship: Min Yoongi x Fem reader

au/genre: Mafia!au

rating: M

wc: 3.2k

Chapter warnings: Just a lot of uncomfortable conversations.

summary: The biggest bombshell has been dropped on Yoongi. He just learned that his best friend will now the run family that was promised to him, and all the while, shit is hitting the fan. Part two of two (or three) before the finale

tagss: @shadowyjellyfishfest @baechugff @maunosorioh @shelylamc @princess-sunshyn @scuzmunkie @wanceu @coldcoffee2121 @maunosorioh @massivelyfullenthusiast @bangtan-famiglia-net

Jungkook was still bitter, even after Seokjin called him the next day to talk to him and Yoongi about what happened. He didn't even go to sleep last night. He was just that pissed off. He didn't have years and years of friendship with Namjoon but he did trust him. He cherished his friendship with him.

He loves the talks and the advice. Jungkook loved the little world that they allowed him in.

But that wasn't the worst part for him.

It was the part where Namjoon brought up his past.

Jungkook knew what he did and what he used to do. It was nothing different from what they do.

Or at least what Namjoon wanted them to do.

Jungkook sat in Yoongi's office. His leg bounced with both anxiety and anger wrapped into a bundle of emotions.

He hoped he didn't disrespect Yoongi in any way by fighting someone he considered a brother or even disrespecting his parents by acting that way in front of them. Jungkook couldn't help it. He couldn't believe the shit that was coming from his mouth.

Seokjin and Yoongi walked into the office. Jungkook stood to his feet and turned to Yoongi, lowering himself into a bow before beginning his apology.

"Hyung, I'm sorry about how I acted in front of your parents. I should have never acted that way in front o-"

Yoongi waved him off.

"I don't need an apology at least not for my father. You could have whooped his ass and I probably wouldn't have cared. But my mother is a different story. I know you wouldn't have done it without good reason. Just tell me what happened." Yoongi said sitting on his desk while Seokjin sat in the chair next to Jungkook.

Jungkook sighed as he sat down and explained just how the fight happened.

"I had no intention of talking to him let alone argue with him. But the shit he was saying drove me over the edge. I didn't do shit to him."

Yoongi chuckled and shook his head before rubbing his face.

"Namjoon is all over the place. He doesn't work well under pressure clearly. My father can do that to you. I'm not upset with it in any way. I understand how you're feeling. I think it's laughable because you didn't take from him in the first place but that's neither here nor there. Just keep up your work at the hospital until it's time for you to leave." Yoongi said pushing himself from his desk and walking to his chair.

"I wanted to ask you about that, is there something else I need to be looking for? I mean Yn isn't there anymore. Hoseok hasn't come around either." Jungkook asked standing as well.

"It'll look odd if you left so soon after Yn. You did just pop up out of nowhere and got a high-level position. You need to wait just a few more months and you'll be out of there. Unless you'd rather stay there?" Seokjin started, "What do you think Yoongi?"

Yoongi hummed and nodded.

"I think that's a good idea. It might even be a good idea for you to stay there. Just in case. Yn probably would never go back but something about that Mingi guy you told me about. It's probably nothing but it was a little odd that he was hired on your floor and you didn't even know about it." Yoongi said tapping his chin before sitting.

Jungkook hummed in agreement, "He said that his mother comes to that floor often when she's in the hospital but now that I'm thinking about it. Yn was working ED...so of course that'll be the floor she comes to. Everyone goes through the emergency department before getting admitted.."

The wheels began to turn in the three men's heads.

"I would keep an eye on him. Hoseok has many connections that we don't even know about. We weren't the most popular guys in school for nothing. If we can find new people to take on, it would be the same for him." Seokjin said. Yoongi nodded.

"One thing in this world, you could never trust anyone. Sometimes, even the ones closest to you." Yoongi sighed shaking his head thinking about Nmajoon.

"Hyung..." Jungkook sighed, "You guys must be really hurt because of this...I'm really sorry." he finished.

Yoongi shrugged while Seokjin averted his eyes to the window.

"There's nothing for you to be sorry about. Just don't do it. Keep the trust we have for you while we still have it." Seokjin mumbled before heading to the door.

"I'm going to check on our assets and make sure to remove Namjoon from everything," Seokjin said turning to Yoongi.

Yoongi's eyes softened.

"Jin..you don't have to worry about that right now. We have time to do those things later."

"No..." Seokjin started, "I need to do this. Not for yours, but," he sighed softly, "For my sanity."

With that, Yoongi nodded.

The men watched Seokjin walk away. Yoongi was full of worry for Seokjin. Never did he ever think things would be like this.

~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~

"So you wouldn't want to take over your family business, hyung?" Jimin asked lying next to Yoongi. He was lying on his side as Yoongi was lying on his back with his arms resting behind his head. His eyes were closed as slowly bit surly his friends began to crowd the room.

Hoseok was lying on the end of the bed half asleep as he chuckled.

"Can you actually imagine Yoongi as a Mob boss? People would be scared to even breathe around him" Taehyung said sitting up on the window bed, adjusting his pillow. Hoseok snorted. "People are like that at school. I bet most of our peers probably think he is one."

Seokjin strolled into the room, finally returning from the store with Namjoon trailing behind him. The boys sat up and began to eagerly dig into the bags Namjoon and Seokjin had brought in. Excitement filled the air as they searched through the treats.

Once they had their snacks in hand, the room fell silent as the boys began to stuff their faces. Jimin, his eyes still sparkling with delight, lifted his head from his devouring snack and turned to Yoongi.

"You never answered my question, Hyung," Jimin said.

Yoongi shrugged nonchalantly.

"I don't think so," he replied, taking a sip of his coke. "There are other things I want in life." Yoongi paused, contemplating his words. "I see how my father is, and I don't want to be like that. He has no friends that he can trust besides Namjoon's dad, and I don't think he trusts him either. I want to keep my friends and maybe start a career in music or something."

Yoongi's words hung in the air, and the room seemed to hold its breath as the boys absorbed his statement. The desire for something more, something different, was evident in Yoongi's eyes, and it sparked a flame of contemplation within each of them.

"Why music?" Taehyung asked.

"Because it's the one thing I have full control over. I make it exactly how I want to. There are no limits to what I can create." Yoongi's eyes sparkled with passion as he spoke about his music. Taehyung listened intently, nodding in understanding. Hoseok beamed and agreed enthusiastically.

"Maybe even fall in love with that one girl that caught your eye?" Namjoon teased, a mischievous glint in his eyes. Yoongi groaned, a faint blush dusting his cheeks. The room erupted with laughter and lighthearted banter, filling the air with warmth and camaraderie.

"I just said she was cute. I didn't say I was going to marry her on sight." Yoongi chuckled, trying to hide his embarrassment. The others continued to tease him playfully, but it was clear that they were all fond of him and his shy demeanor.

"I mean, she's kind of hot, Hyung," Hoseok spoke up, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

"If you don't. I will." Taehyung challenged, winking at Yoongi.

After the boys cleaned up the room and settled back into their spots, drifting off to sleep, Jimin and Yoongi remained awake, engaged in hushed conversations. They shared their dreams and aspirations, their hopes and fears, connecting on a deeper level than they had before.

In the midst of their deep conversation, Jimin gazed at Yoongi with admiration and conviction, seeing the potential within him. "Yoongi, you have a natural ability to lead and inspire others," Jimin said, his voice carrying a mix of reverence and encouragement. "I genuinely believe that if you were in charge, you'd bring about positive changes for the better in your family. You are nothing like your dad."

Yoongi couldn't help but chuckle softly at Jimin's words. Turning to face his friend, he wore a gentle smile that spoke volumes. "Jimin, I appreciate your faith in me, but it's just not the path I want," Yoongi began, his tone sincere and thoughtful. "My heart yearns for a life free from the weight of responsibility and the constant fear of losing those I hold dear. I don't want to risk damaging our bond."

Jimin's expression shifted as he pouted playfully, sitting up straight to meet Yoongi's gaze. "Yoongi, you could never lose us," Jimin assured him, his words carrying a conviction that warmed Yoongi's heart. "We are brothers, connected for life. No matter what path you choose, our bond will remain unbreakable."

Hoseok groaned as he lifted his body to face the two other boys who were now also sitting up.

"Shut up already. You love each other, we get it" Hoseok laughed tiredly scooting in between Jimin and Yoongi stealing a spot in between them.

Jimin rolled his eyes and chuckled, "Fuck you, man."

Yoongi chuckled and laid back down on the plush bed, his eyes crinkling at the corners in amusement. However, Hoseok's expression turned more serious as he spoke.

"But Jimin's right," he said, his voice carrying a weight that commanded attention. Yoongi's gaze shifted to Hoseok, and Jimin also turned to face him.

Hoseok's eyes held a determined glint as he continued, "Nothing can break our bond. Not even you being a mob boss."

Yoongi's amusement faded as he looked at Hoseok and then at Jimin. A flicker of doubt crossed his features, but he couldn't deny the sincerity in their eyes.

"You promise?" Yoongi asked, his voice laced with a hint of vulnerability. He glanced back and forth between Jimin and Hoseok, seeking reassurance.

"We promise," they said in unison, their voices resounding with unwavering conviction.

Yoongi's heart swelled with a warmth he hadn't felt in a long time. Their words enveloped him like a comforting embrace, reminding him that despite his past and present actions, their friendship remained unbreakable.

A gentle smile spread across Yoongi's face, and he nodded slowly. "Thank you," he whispered, his voice barely above a murmur as the two boys fell into a deep slumber.

~~~~~~~

"What do we do now? She doesn't work here anymore." Mingi said walking his rounds on one of the 3 floors he was assigned.

Felix sighed as he walked alongside Mingi, posing as a patient asking for directions.

"I am not sure. I wouldn't even know the next step. Hoseok told us to meet him here so, we should just wait for him." Felix said propping his body on the wall while Mingi stretched.

Hoseok, Jimin, and Taehyung were walking down the hallways of the hospital, heading to meet up with Felix and Mingi when one of your coworkers stopped Hoseok with a smile.

"Hello sir, are you looking for Yn?" she said sweetly.

Hoseok chuckled and placed his hands into his pockets, shaking his head.

"I heard she left. I'm a little disappointed. She was my favorite nurse. My friends and I feel like we haven't shown her our full... appreciation." Hoseok said with a smile. Jimin and Taehyung followed up with a nod and smile.

"She helped save my life. I would really like to repay her." Jimin said. "I would love nothing more."

Your coworker smiled and nodded.

"She's amazing. So many people love her. Actually, some of us got her a few parting gifts. She's been gone for a while now but we plan on honoring her one last time with a party. If you want to bring her a gift, you most certainly can." She said with a bright smile.

Boy, that piqued Hoseok's interest.

"Thank you so much for that. We will be back up here to contribute. If you guys need anything for the party itself...please give us a call." Hoseok smiled nodding to Taehyung.

Taehyung stepped closer to the young woman and leaned down as he reached into her pocket, taking her pen and paper. Writing his number down, he smirked and handed it back to her with a wink.

"Call me," Taehyung smirked as he followed behind the two chuckling men. Leaving the woman stuck in the same place. 

The five men finally met up and Hoseok wasted no time.

"Mingi, you're going to continue to work here. I know she isn't here but, I know Yoongi has to have someone here working for him. It'll look weird if you leave so soon, especially right after Yn leaves. Felix," He trailed on, "They are throwing a party for our nurse. I need you to do two things. First, find out whatever you can about where it's going to be. I think we should be in attendance for our lifesaver" He said walking to the exit with Jimin and Taehyung.

"Yes sir," they said in unison before Felix turned to Hoseok "W-wait sir?"

Hoseok turned and with a hum.

"What was the other thing you needed me to do?" he asked.

Hoseok smirked,

"Make sure the woman of the hour knows how...loved she is." he chuckled before leaving.

~~~~~~~~

Namjoon was furious after the fight. Namjoon knew that he said a lot of things to piss Jungkook off, so he had a good reason for fighting, but he still couldn't understand why he had to be so disrespectful. He had always tried to teach Jungkook to be respectful of others, and he was disappointed that Jungkook had not listened to him.

If anything, he was the one that vouched for him to stick around.

Yoongi didn't care to keep him around or get rid of him but it was Namjoon who convinced Yoongi of his usefulness.

Namjoon was also worried about the future of their friendship. With all of his brothers. He didn't know if they would ever be able to go back to the way things were before any of this. He hoped that they could work things out, but he didn't know if it was possible.

His mind was all over the place.

He was never meant to be the boss of anything. Namjoon was comfortable with being under Yoongi. It was his best friend after all. They did everything together. He wanted to keep doing this together. 

Namjoon also felt the comment about Yoongi's potential firstborn was overboard. 

"Namjoon get your head out of your ass. You better not fuck this up" His father snapped at him.

Kim would love nothing more than for his son to run the Min family.

He didn't hate Min. He is his best friend after all, but he loves power.

Having his son call the shots would be everything he could ever need.

He'd have it all and everyone would have to answer to him and he loved the thought of that.

"I don't want to fucking do this. Yoongi is my fucking friend, my fucking brother. I already fought Jungkook and lost the two people who know me better than anyone what fucking more could you want!?" Namjoon said defeated. "They are my best friends. I've told them everything. They've told me everything. Now they won't even sit in a room with me longer than five fucking minutes."

Kim looked at his son with the most disappointed look.

Kim and Min may be best friends but he was nowhere near like Min.

Min might be an asshole to his children but he truly, deep down, wants what's best for his sons. If his wife were to get pregnant again, Min would drop everything for her.

Kim, a man driven by ambition and power, did not share the same sentiments as his son, Namjoon. While he loved Namjoon and his wife, there were other priorities that held greater significance to him. Ruthlessly, he would abandon his family without hesitation if it meant securing his position of authority.

This fundamental difference in values led to a lack of understanding between Kim and his son. Namjoon's perspective and priorities often bewildered Kim, who couldn't fathom why his son would not prioritize power and control above all else. Kim's unwavering pursuit of power blinded him to the emotional depth and complexities of relationships, leading to a widening rift between him and his son.

As Namjoon grew older, he witnessed firsthand the sacrifices his father made in the name of power. He saw how Kim's ambition consumed him, leaving little room for empathy or compassion. This realization filled Namjoon with a mix of disappointment and pity. He yearned for a deeper connection with his father, one that went beyond the superficial trappings of wealth and status.

If Min told him today, that he didn't want anything to do with him, he wouldn't give a fuck tomorrow.

He would probably lose everything but he could also build himself back up, just based on his connections from Min.

Kim would never cross Min though.

He knew that he wouldn't make it far unless he were to move out of Korea.

"Namjoon, I truthfully don't give a fuck about what you want to do. This can put our family on the map. This would give us the recognition we deserve Namjoon." Kim started before walking closer to his son. 

"Listen," Kim started, "I've always told you never to make too many friends, especially after Hoseok.  It would be best if you wanted more for yourself Namjoon. You are way too smart to be someone's lap dog. Now me and Kim are always on the same page. What he thinks, I think. What I think, he thinks. You let Yoongi and Seokjin think for you. That's not how I raised you to be." 

Min had a hard time, more than he would like to admit. 

He'd be the first to say that he's truly an asshole but that didn't mean that he wanted nothing to do with his son. 

"You pushed him to act this way, what did you expect Min?" Yoongi's mother cried. 

Another son has gone because of the sick and childish games played by her husband in this sick world. She felt helpless as she watched her sons walk out those doors. She felt pathetic because she didn't do a thing to stop them. 

She had no one to blame but herself. 

Any other mother in her shoes would have chosen their kids over their husband.  No matter how much they loved their husband, there would have been no question regarding their children. 

But that's the one thing that's holding her back. Her loyalty to Min has proven to be unhealthy and incredibly toxic. 

"I KNOW-" Min said before taking a deep breath, "I know...I know."

[shara-dee]

Absolutely controversial review on 'Heatwaves' freshly out of the oven

okay, so this book is FUCKING INSANE.

and I don't mean it necessarily good.

I told someone in my comment section that I'm more or less positive about this book, but at the time I only reached the middle of the book and, well...

Let me lay out the facts first.

This book features:

• Pathological Altruism and God's Complex of Alex Chen

• Steph carrying the only brain cell

• Sapphic Drama™

• Many many flashbacks of Chen Family trauma

• Shit load of political drama

• And the equal amount of Daddy Issues

• A couple references both to Steph's Story and True Colors

• Immaculate voice acting from Erika Mori (this woman has range)

• Me, feeling sorry for Steph every chapter

Ahem. Now more in-depth and, as I hope, more coherent thoughts about Heatwaves. As was agreed between me and @areyouintogirlsorwhat, who listened to me yelling about it, I would describe this book as:

Shit happened. And also unhappened.

Let me just tell that, coming from me, as Alex and Steph are my dearest, I had a REALLY hard time with Alex in this book. A huge chunk of book is just Alex trying to understand that she doesn't need to overuse her powers to help people and- Well. It took her many pages to understand that even though all the events happen within only 2 days. It was really intense.

As for the setting, we enter Barbazal, a small town in Colorado, where we are just mashed into a big ass election drama. Yeah, election. Big Sigh. Actually super boring exposition and I didn't care much about most of the characters there, except some and pretty much in the end.

God knows, I was busy internally screaming at Alex.

Alex is. A lot in this book. And the worst thing, I can believe that canonically she would became a person from this book. I try to avoid spoilers as much as I can. But let's just say. SHE NEEDED TO STOP AND THINK FOR LITERALLY A SECOND AND THEN THIS BOOK WOULDN'T HAVE HALF OF ITS DRAMA.

Steph though? Is absolutely great. When I said she carries the only braincell out of the two of them I meant it. I was really feeling for her the whole book with how patient she was with Alez and how much she allowed her to do, still being at her side the whole time. And I mean it when I say that sometimes Alex could use Steph's angrier side.

Okay, I'm feeling like I'm too bitter about this book.

Actually it has so much potential. It makes a great job exploring Alex's character, her flaws, her thoughts, her powers, her overall feelings towards things. And I love how many flashbacks of her we have in book. Erika's voice breaking each time she says 'Dad', Alex always wondering how things could've been for her... She actually has character growth going on in this book. And it fills in some empty spaces the game has left. So even if I have a strong opinion about her certain choices, I really like how controversial she was there, because in the end it still makes her a really deep imperfect protagonist.

I didn't really care for the plot until it became super intense and insane. I thought I was going to explode reading the 16-18 chapters, because it had so much going on.

But, well, it still was an enjoyable experience nonetheless, BIG THANKS to Erika Mori who voiced it, I don't think I would've enjoyed it as much if it wasn't for her mad acting skills. Her acting as Steph is actually the cutest thing.

So yeah. My honest opinion? A solid 7/10 for me, but again, Erika makes me biased.

The plot is not really interesting, I suggest buying the audiobook specifically to hear Alex expressing all her emotions in character, really compensates for all the dubious shit she does.

I still would've bought it, even if I knew how much I would scream.

However, if you're not a big fan of Alex, I don't think you would like this book. If you want to read this book purely for Chenrich, I also think you will disappointed because even though they are still there, being cuties, their relationship is only a 25% of the book. And yes, again, there're many controversial things going on, so if you have hard time reading your fav making shitty decisions, maybe you should spare yourself.

Thank you for reading this review, will be happy to hear your thoughts if you read the book or if you have any questions and don't mind spoilers.

[ojamayellow]

Earthspark spoilers. It's time for my opinions and theories.

Before I start, I am aware of the writers changing. I will put that into consideration in this. And for the record, I did enjoy Season 2 so far, but I admit it has nothing on S1 for now.

First two episodes were really good, I loved the Breakdad moments, I love Aftermath and we get a glimpse on how the Decepticons have been operating. 2nd episode with the Quintesson gave us some lore and suspense, and I always love a Mo and Thrash tag team. These episodes felt... right for Earthspark, but not as Season 2 starters? If that makes sense.

Hashtag's alt mode is neat, but I miss her chunkiness in robot mode. Made her feel more distinct you know? But I'm with the others saying VAL being an AI in Hashtag's mind is really weird considering what Mandroid did. Maybe she's coping? I have a theory that this VAL might be manipulated in a future episode to control Hashtag, but for the sake of Hashtag's well-being, I HOPE this doesn't happen. (Also, hi Shockwave).

Carnival episode. Is Schloder reduced to an incidental now? I hope not and that he becomes important as well. But also, I figure its a traveling carnival/circus, which makes sense to why we haven't seen this Fairemaestro before, and the little interaction with Swindle shows up 'oh yeah he's a bad guy' already. But you can't just tease a GIANT COSMOS-LOOKING RIDE AND THEN 'OH BTW ITS COSMOS' LAST FEW MINUTES. If Cosmos doesn't show up in later episodes I'll be so disappointed, like...it's freakin' Cosmos! <-Perfect design though. *chef kiss*

I do think the Robby crush on Izzy was cute, but it being involved with the plot felt....eh? It was like, nothingburger to me.

JBAM episode. I LOVED THEM. Jawbreaker has clearly gotten more comfortable with himself and such since Grimlock, but him not taking a hint from Aftermath (who was being direct) reminds me of my younger self. <-Was an insane chatterbox and would not shut up no matter what was said to me.

But the contaminated energon stuff like, yeah callback to that weird bear. Sorry if I forgot, but back in S1, was there a reason GHOST was just leaving it around? I don't remember. And what's with the horrific energon mushrooms, and those poor animals? I know people who are going to be turned off from this show just from that alone, but at least it's 'off screen'? But also Aftermath betraying Jawbreaker hurts, I was hoping he'd like, impress Breakdown with the stolen water BUT NOPE, NO MORE AFTERMATH AND BREAKDAD STUFF. (I know Aftermath was like, not 'what did you just call me' when he was called Son but, cmon!!)

Spitfire episode. I personally think this episode went hard. Gave me Sonic VS Metal Sonic vibes. The fight scenes were really done well, and the tension was so good! To me, Spitfire wanted to be superior but felt inferior when not chosen for the mission, so that desire to be the best consumed her. I'm personally a big fan of this episode, and Alex is awesome. And so was Spitfire, I'm kinda obsessed with her.

Bodyswap episode. Always love a good bodyswap scenario, but somehow this felt... weak. It's plausible for the others to believe Spitfire (as Twitch) had a scrambled processor from the previous episode BUT the fact Wheeljack was the first to catch on? Before a Malto? I'm SO GLAD they referred to Dad2 again but, IDK, feels... strange to me.

Trailer episode. Was kinda nothingburger again? It felt like they needed to add SOMETHING before the horrors of the final two episodes, but maybe I just need to re-watch it because I didn't feel much from it. Optimus was clearly getting aggravated and uncomfortable, which was making me uncomfortable. But also, OPLITA? COMPLICATED? If they don't ever bring this up again I might be a bit...bitter.

And finally, the Witwicky 2-Parter. My anxiety was through the roof here, but I also kinda figured it out early that a Titan was involved. Was still surprised though, and her design is awesome?! But what was making me panic more than anything was Hashtag was going to see Starscream. Yes I know, a one-episode bond may not mean much, but we all had hopes, yeah? Anyway, I love nasty bitch Starscream. It's what makes him Starscream. And I do think what he did was in-character. But it would feel off if Earthspark was someone's introduction to Starscream, you know? This specific one, who's attitude told the audience 'I hate Megatron he abused me so I'd be a better leader than him'. But also...

The scene with him killing the Chaos Terrans was a fucking horror movie. It does a lot when I am SCARED OF STARSCREAM. I wish he didn't do it, but he also needed the shards. If the Autobots/Maltos needed the shards from the Terrans, how would they do it? Would they hesitate to find a safer way to keep the Chaos Terrans alive? Or would there be some sort of urgency? It really makes me think, but Starscream wanted those shards ASAP, he does what he need to do to get what he wants, he's Starscream. A manipulative, traitorous bitch who almost never gets his way in the end.

But you might be wondering, "Kit did you feel like the character development was thrown away for Starscream?" Well, yes and no.

It's really upsetting how Starscream twisted his advice to Hashtag. Truly upsetting. But it also does feel like something a Starscream would do. I keep flip-flopping between "yeah this makes sense" and "um what the FUCK writers". See what I mean by "yes and no?" And Hashtag calling Starscream worse than Megatron AND Screamer taking it as a compliment? Again, very Starscream thing to do, but I think ES! Starscream should've been at least a bit offended?! And out of all bots to call him the worst... Why did it have to be Hashtag? I guess it has more 'meaning', but still...

My theory (or moreso, hopeful thinking) is that Starscream re-invented his advice to Hashtag so he could get detached from her. Starscream had a mission, a personal selfish goal, and he needed to take care of HIMSELF, no friendship. Only comrades willing to follow him, and the Maltos were not those comrades.

My other theory (which I gained from seeing someone on twitter saying this) is that the Chaos Terrans DIDN'T GREY OUT FROM DEATH. Therefore, there is a chance they can return. Maybe something from the Allspark or Matrix or some kinda macguffin will help?! And I sure hope they come back, because they could learn to be good (but still cheeky) and we can bring back the messages and theming from Season 1! Right, right?

As for 'Starscream the child killer'...look, it's upsetting I know. But like I said, selfish goals. And while I am not familiar with every Starscream from different canons, I've met enough versions. Other Starscreams have have committed war crimes, blew up a human hospital, threatened to kill innocents, committed war crimes, wanted to kill everyone to end a war, squished humans in his servos... (yes I know Skybound is more for an adult audience than kids but I'm just saying). War crimes. I am not excusing Starscream's actions here, but when he needs something, he'll do what it takes to get it, for his own selfish goals. It makes sense but I also feel its wrong and I agree with other fans who were quite upset with this scenario. If the Chaos Terrans don't come back I'll be really sad.

Again, I've considered the fact this show has new writers, which is unfortunate. I saw someone on here say that Season 2 (so far) feels like a bootlegged version of S1, which is how I feel about it. I did enjoy the episodes, but they were a bit messy. Also, the lack of Nightshade and honorary family member Bumblebee really made me sad. Was it a script decision, or could they not afford Danny Pudi enough because they used the money on the new cast like Flea? (Don't quote me on like, celebrity net worth here). The lack of Nightshade though is very suspicious though, considering how big of a deal it was for them to exist as a non-binary character.

Side note, Shockwave. I'm glad he finds Cybertron itself more important than creating a New Cybertron, it feels right for him to not care about Earth. But if he going to attempt to lead now? Or something?

If you read this, thanks! If you have any responses feel free to reply or reblog. Feel free to reblog in general, I love hearing opinions and such.

[whumpsday]

Kane & Jim BBU AU #3: Erased

Previous / Kane & Jim AUs Masterlist

content: bbu, pet whump, rescue, recovery, caretaking, amnesia, whumper turned whumpee, starvation

takes place 10 years after Liz rescues 913/Jim. don't forget to read ⭐ this drabble ⭐ taking place between #2 and #3 first!!

@bbu-on-the-side BBU Community Days #13: Safety

-

Jim was a person. He'd been a person for almost ten years, now. It was hard at first, but he was used to it by now.

He couldn't legally work, but he'd been helping out where he could. In a way, he was still doing the same things he did as a domestic, just by choice this time, for his family. He was good at it, and even if he wasn't a fan of all of it, he liked cooking. Liz told him he'd always liked cooking, even before. He had no problem believing that. He even did some odd jobs around the neighborhood that worked in cash, babysitting and mowing lawns and shoveling snow.

He wasn't as involved in the pet lib stuff as she was. It scared him, even after he'd started being able to stand up to the voice in the back of his head that repeated everything his handlers told him. Too risky.

Life wasn't a constant walk on eggshells anymore. He still got scared sometimes, or fell into his old conditioning, but he was safe. He was free.

So when Jim was out grocery shopping, he almost dropped his basket when he saw him.

There, right down the aisle. He'd know that face anywhere. Practically the only face he saw for the first five years of his memorable life.

He almost bolted right away, but something was... off. Master didn't look like how he usually did. Gone were the expensive suits and bitter scowl, replaced with plain clothing and an anxious frown.

He was wearing a collar.

Jim ducked into the next aisle, watching him through the gaps in the shelves. There was no way, right? Master- Kane was wildly rich. He'd have no need to sell himself to WRU.

But Kane went missing years ago. No one knew where he was, or what had happened to him.

He watched Kane further, looking down at a list and plucking items off the shelves, eyebrows bunched together with nerves. Jim had never seen Kane look this... unsure of himself.

There was a barcode on his wrist too, sure enough. It wasn't clear enough to make out from this far, but he could see the number, something with a 4 in it.

He wondered if Kane's owner gave him a name.

It was stupid, Jim knew. But he had to. He couldn't just leave, not after seeing this.

Jim hesitantly approached, ready to run at any time. "Master?" he asked, voice coming out smaller than he'd have liked.

Kane turned, eyeing him up and down, only growing more tense. "My master sent me to do his shopping, sir." He shrunk away slightly, as if afraid Jim would hurt him after finding out he was alone.

"Do you remember me?" Jim blurted out, despite already knowing the answer.

"I'm sorry, sir." Kane's hands gripped the cart's handle tight, like it would protect him. "I'm- I'm bad at- at everything. I'm so sorry."

Of course Kane thought Jim was a person. He had taken care to remove every last trace of his tattoo, though the marks on his neck from the collar wouldn't go away, even after a decade. But Kane wouldn't be able to see that under his turtleneck.

"It's alright," he said softly. The words 913 had wanted to hear so, so badly. "I'm Jim. I knew you before."

That certainly got Kane's attention. "I'm- my designation is 110146. Do you mean... before I was a pet, sir?"

"Yeah." Jim could fully take stock of Kane's state, now that he was standing close. Dark circles ringed his eyes, bruises poked out from under his sleeve. He looked thinner than Jim had ever seen him, to the point it was obvious he wasn't being allowed enough food. And-

Something that looked like a knife mark, barely visible above his neckline.

"Yours hurts you?" Jim asked.

Kane seemed to study him, searching for a shred of mocking for a moment. He found none. "Master can do as he likes with his pet," he settled on.

Jim stepped closer, lowering his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "Mine did, too." His heart raced at the revelation. He hadn't told anyone outside of pet lib about his past, ever. And here he was telling Kane, of all people.

Kane glanced at his wrist again, but of course he found nothing. "Yours, sir?" he asked.

Jim tugged his collar down for a moment, revealing the faint outline of a collar that had scarred itself permanently into his skin. "Mine."

Kane's eyes widened. "Oh."

"You wanna get out of here?" Jim extended a hand toward Kane, even as every logical bone in his body screamed at him that he was being a careless idiot, throwing his life away for someone who never cared.

Kane looked around wildly. "I can't just- Master would be furious."

"Life can be better than this. I promise." Jim kept his arm extended. "No more hurting. And I can get you a good meal."

Kane stood there frozen for a long moment, just staring at him, before he broke down in quiet tears. He forced himself to nod. "I- I- Thank you."

He reached forward and took Jim's hand uncertainly, bony fingers wrapping around Jim's own.

"You're doing great," Jim encouraged. Despite a lifetime of resentment, all he could see was the terrified boxie in front of him now. Kane couldn't even remember how cruel he used to be. He couldn't even remember his own name. "Just try and calm down a little. You're gonna be okay."

Kane clung to Jim's forearm like a lifeline. "Yes, s-sir."

Jim tried to calm himself down, too. Having Kane on him like this flipped a switch in his brain that told him to cower and placate, that he was about to be hurt. But he managed to repress it, with some effort. He'd had a lot of practice over the years.

When Kane got himself to stop crying and wiped the tears from his eyes, he nodded. "Thank you for- for being patient with me. I'm ready."

"Good," Jim said approvingly. "I'm just gonna check out what I've got in my basket, and you can follow behind me and pretend to be... you know. We'll get outta here without a second look from anyone. Just follow my lead."

Kane did spare a glance for his nearly-full shopping cart, but nodded agreeably anyway. "Yes, sir."

God, that was still so weird.

Jim eyed the meat section they'd met in. Kane always loved steak. He couldn't afford the fancy stuff he used to make as Kane's pet, but he grabbed a cheap, on-sale cut and threw it in his basket.

"By the way, your name's Kane. Kane de Sang."

-

There was no issue getting out of the supermarket, and Six- Kane, now, or maybe again- followed behind Jim like his life depended on it. Jim from before. He wanted to offer to carry the bags, but he didn't. He didn't want to do anything to disrupt what was happening, this miraculous whisking-away.

He was being so bad. Master would be beyond furious. Master would punish him worse than he'd ever been punished before. But Six was so tired. He had no idea what was in store for him here, but it had to be better than back home.

Jim led him to an apartment building, opening the door and ushering him inside. "I'm home!" he called, setting the groceries down on the kitchen counter. He turned to Six and gestured toward the couch. "Have a seat there," he ordered, his voice gentle.

"Yes, sir. Thank you." Six sat, grateful for the simple, easy-to-follow order.

"We don't have a lot of extra space, so you're gonna be sleeping on the couch, sorry. I'm just gonna go explain what's going on to my sister. Don't worry, she's with us-"

"What the fuck!" a woman shouted as she came out from one of the rooms. She glared at Six, bolting protectively in front of Jim.

Six pressed himself back against the couch, putting his arms up in surrender. "I'm s-sorry, ma'am, I'm so sorry, I thought- he said-" He cut himself off with a sob. He was so stupid to go along with this, breaking the rules. He didn't even know why this woman was angry with him, but at least with Master he knew what to expect. He didn't know how to please these new people. How could he have thought this would work? "I'm sorry!"

Jim placed a hand on her shoulder. "Liz, it's okay."

"You can't have him!" the woman called Liz shouted at Six with a glare, only confusing him further.

"I don't- Ma'am, I'm so sorry, I don't understand!" Six cried.

"Liz." Jim stepped out from behind her and, to Six's great relief, got between the two of them. "Look at him for two seconds. Like actually look."

Liz listened, even though Jim was sort-of-a-pet. Her eyes lingered on Six's collar.

"He doesn't even remember," Jim continued.

Liz eyed him warily. "You're a boxie? You?"

"Yes, ma'am," Six answered, still pressed back into the couch. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize that- that my presence here would be a detriment. I could go back?" He could still make it back to the grocery store and home with the shopping. Master would punish his lateness, but it would be far better than a punishment for an attempted escape.

"You're not going back," Jim said so firmly that Six couldn't possibly argue with him. He turned to the woman. "He's just another rescue. Could we host him? I just- I gotta make sure myself. That he's taken care of."

Another? he wondered.

"You sure? You don't have to deal with him again if you don't wanna. There's plenty of people who'd be willing to safehouse. He's put you through enough."

Six's stomach dropped. When Jim said he knew him before, Six had thought he meant they were friendly. Why would someone he's been enemies with help him?

"I'm sure." Jim stepped forward and gestured toward Six. "Liz, this is Kane. Kane, this is my sister, Liz. Neither of us are gonna hurt you. You're safe now."

Six- Kane, he was Kane now, he had to remember- bowed his head. "It's nice to meet you, ma'am."

Liz wouldn't stop looking at Kane like he was a bomb that could go off at any moment. "We've met," she said coldly.

"C'mon, be nice. He can't even remember," Jim pointed out.

Liz sighed. "Yeah, sorry, you're right." Her gaze softened. "It's good to meet you too, Kane." She headed to the kitchen. "I'll put the groceries away before I head to work."

"Thanks. I'll save you leftovers." Jim sat next to him. "So, you got any questions? I know this is a lot, believe me. I've been through it, too."

"What will be expected of me here, sir?" Kane asked. That was the most important thing. He couldn't do what he was supposed to without knowing what it was first. "What will my duties be?"

"First, you can just rest and recover. It's been a while since you've had a break, I bet, and you look like a strong gust of wind could blow you over. Take a breather. Once you're better, we can split work around the house and some odd jobs I do in the neighborhood, which is mostly just stuff you know how to do anyway. Domestic stuff. If there's anything I want you to do, I'll let you know, so don't worry about trying to guess."

Kane nodded, a bit nervous about not having duties to fulfill. He wanted to make a good impression.

"I mean, I assume you're a domestic, 'cause you were doing the shopping. Unless I'm wrong...?" Jim asked cautiously.

"I am, sir," Kane assured him.

Jim gave him a wry smile. "I was, too."

Liz bopped Jim on the head as she passed by. "See you later. Uh, have fun." She stopped for a moment, looking at Kane quizzically. "Can I see your shoulder for a sec?" she asked, pointing at his right.

"Liz-"

"Yes, ma'am." Kane pulled the neck of his shirt down, exposing the scar there.

She brushed her fingertips against it, gentler than he'd thought she would be. "Does it hurt?"

"Only sometimes, ma'am, when I strain my shoulder too much. But usually not. I've always had it," he reported.

Liz tapped the scar. "I did that." She stepped back.

"Oh." Kane had been told it was a bullet wound. This woman had shot him? Why? Was she going to do it again? His mind raced with fear.

"I don't regret doing it. But I'm sorry it still hurts." Liz nodded at him before leaving the apartment.

Jim shook his head. "She's too much." He stood up. "Let's go to the kitchen. I'll make your favorite. 'Cept I can't get the fancy stuff like you used to get, but I hope you like it anyway."

Food. Kane was going to be allowed a meal, that was what Jim had said, instead of just the scraps. "Thank you so much, sir."

"No problem." Jim led him to the kitchen and indicated for Kane to sit as he started preparing food. It felt wrong. Kane was the pet, he was supposed to be doing the chores. But Jim said he wasn't supposed to yet, so he didn't.

"Any other questions?" Jim asked as he worked.

"What are the rules?" Kane ventured, trying to suppress a shudder as Jim picked up the knife. But he didn't come at Kane with it, he just started peeling a potato.

"Don't hurt anyone or destroy other people's stuff on purpose. Don't go tattling to WRU, obviously. Pretty much as long as you're not hurting anyone, no one's gonna have an issue with you. No discipline. You don't have to be scared of messing up. And you're allowed to want stuff."

It sounded far too good to be true. "Okay," he said, a bit choked up with emotion. "Please let me know if it's rude to ask, but when- when you first got away, was it easy for you, sir?"

Jim paused for a moment, then continued. Kane tensed, worried he'd offended his... new master? But Jim just kept talking. "It wasn't. I was all messed up. I was happy to be out, but I had no idea how to be my own person. And shit was... complicated with Liz. She kept expecting me to be someone I wasn't anymore. And I missed- my master, sometimes. He wasn't good to me, but he was everything I knew. And there were good times too, mixed in with the bad. So it made everything real complicated. But it all worked out eventually. I'm... actually happy now. I'm not the guy I was before, but I'm better." He smiled at Kane.

Kane didn't think he would ever miss his master. There weren't good times too. It was just pain and fear. "I'm glad you're happy now, sir."

"Me, too."

As Jim cooked, it was hard for Kane to restrain himself. When he cooked, he made use of everything he had. Potato peels that he would have eaten raw as he worked were dumped in the trash. He wondered if he would get in trouble for digging those out later. It wasn't against the rules, as far as Jim's description of them went.

At last, dinner was ready. Jim brought over two plates, piled high with food, and set one in front of Kane. He could hardly believe it.

"This is all for me?" he asked, just to make sure.

Jim's eyes fixated on him, watching intently for his reaction. "Yep, dig in."

Kane cut off a bite of meat, practically melting at its delicious taste. It was more than that- it tasted... familiar, somehow.

"Do you like it?" Jim prompted, an anxious look in his eyes that Kane knew all too well in his own. Seeking approval.

"It's the best thing I've ever tasted," he said emphatically.

Jim beamed, picking up his own fork. "I'm glad."

Kane had never eaten this much at once in his life. Everything was so good, better than anything he'd ever been able to make. When he'd finished his plat, he felt full for once, full with food he was allowed to have. It was the best feeling in the world.

"I- I'm sorry if I've wronged you," Kane said. "I didn't know. Thank you for helping me anyway."

Jim stared at him with an unreadable expression. "Oh." He shook his head. "Yeah, I mean, yeah. 'Course. You're pretty much not even the same guy."

A sneaking suspicion had been creeping up on Kane, and he was growing more and more certain of it by the minute, no matter how much he hoped it wasn't true. "Was I...?" He touched his own collar.

Jim glanced away. "Yeah."

Mine did, too. Jim said his master hit him, too. Had Kane been just like Master, but to Jim? Was that why Jim was so anxious for his approval? That's who he was before, that was Kane de Sang?

"I'm sorry," he said again, now feeling the weight of what he'd done. "You didn't deserve that. You're so kind."

Jim wiped at the tears starting to form in his eyes. "Thanks. I never thought I'd- thanks."

"Sir?" he asked, since this seemed to be going well. "You said I was... allowed to want things?"

"Yeah. You're allowed," Jim confirmed.

"I don't think I want to be Kane de Sang anymore."

-

in canon, liz has a good-sized 3-bedroom house, because housing by the vampire territory border is dirt cheap since no one wants to live there. in a world without vampires, i am whisking their comfortable house away. apartment be upon ye

and that's the final part of this AU miniseries! hope you enjoyed!

taglist in reblog!