#i'm so fucking stupid and weak for never holding onto that resolution not to share that shit with them

[anaalnathrakhs]

it feels like another stupid fucking thing to get pressed about, since it's yknow, a normal thing and i'm the only weirdo in the world who would like to do different, but it doesn't feel great that my parents just go around telling people about my school results and whereabouts and stuff? like my graduation exams went better than the notes i'd been getting during the year, so i was pretty happy with it, but yknow, grandma's congratulating me about specific exams scores even though i didn't tell her anything, my dad's friends and coworkers know, my mom's side of the family knows... one time we attended an event in a city where i briefly went to a boarding school for very specific and complex and personal reasons, and my dad just starts referencing AH YEAH THAT'S WHERE MY KID WENT TO THAT SCHOOL to his (famously nosy) friends right in front of me like. like it's nothing. and god i know it's not MY info i know i can't tell them to not talk about stuff to their friends, i try to act normal about it in the moment, but yknow. thinking back on it. it's not super easy to know that they KNOW they've been told and nothing will ever make them unhear it. that things that happened to ME, in MY life, are public fucking knowledge and tying me a little more to these people.