#i'm not well-versed in the novels myself

[murdockparker]

Of the Same Mind

Benedict Bridgerton x Reader

Summary: A mutual distaste in a certain author—should he even have the grace to be called that—leads to an unexpected meeting.

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: mentions of drinking/alcohol, pregnancy, fluff, time skip

A/N: a cute lil request! made me actually read a little Byron myself to get the gist! and it wasn't that terrible I'm so sorry to disappoint

Dull. 

Everything was dull. What was supposed to be the social event of the season was shortened due to poor weather—an outdoors event of sorts, it seemed, Benedict really didn’t pay his mother much attention when she explained the whole ordeal. Thus, half of the ton was crammed into Lord Whitehill’s home instead of his luscious grounds, all due to the pouring rain. Most conversation was boring, most of the ladies were whining about the rain, the men whining about their whining wives and daughters. 

At least the drinks were good. 

“…seriously think that fodder is worth your breath?”

Benedict’s ears perked up, focusing on a conversation that was decidedly not about the current weather. A breath of fresh air. 

“I-I did not mean to insult you, miss,” a young gentleman sputtered, his face rosy red. “I only meant to indulge you in poetry of the highest regard—” 

“If that was your intention, you would have chosen from a finer list of poets. Byron?” The lady nearly laughed out loud. “Byron is the bottom of the barrel, as it were, so your intention was ill-placed.”

“Byron is a well-regarded poet—”

“By who? Chamber pots?” 

Benedict nearly spat out his drink. The action alone brought the attention of the arguing couple to him—both sets of eyes trained on the tall Bridgerton at once. “Oh,” he fake coughed, “it seems the drink went down the wrong way, please, forgive me.”

The man—who Benedict now recognized as Lord Whitehill’s son—scoffed. “Bridgerton. You are well versed in the arts, are you not?”

Benedict nodded. “I dabble.”

“Would you please explain to Miss (Y/L/N) that Byron is a novel poet,” Mr. Whitehill asked, “and that she should be flattered I recited poetry for her, regardless of the poet?”

Miss (Y/L/N). So that was the lady’s name. 

“But that would be lying, Whitehill,” Benedict gasped, pressing a hand to his chest. “And I am ever a gentleman, raised to never lie, especially to a fine lady such as Miss (Y/L/N).”

She smiled at that. 

“You do not agree?”

“Oh I certainly agree with Miss (Y/L/N),” Benedict said quickly, setting his glass down. “Byron is a mockery to the art—meaningless words and jaunty titles, why, I tried to read his latest and it put me right to sleep.”

“I fear I had the same reaction,” Miss (Y/L/N) said, turning to Benedict in earnest. “Right before I decided to throw it to the flames.”

They both laughed.

“Imbeciles, the both of you,” Mr. Whitehill said, pushing past the newly acquainted pair. “Keep insulting me like that and I’ll have my father throw the both of you out into the storm.”

“Mr. Whitehill,” Miss (Y/L/N) said softly, her eyes melting into puddles of apology. “I fear we were not insulting you, but rather your taste in poets. I also fear there is a stark difference in that, for if I were to insult you, I’d make a more fitting jab, more educated in that regard.”

The shorter gentleman stormed off, steam nearly pouring from his ears. Benedict laughed.

“I must say, Miss (Y/L/N),” Benedict leaned down. “You have quite the sharp tongue.”

“I am known to be rather well spoken,” she beamed, standing a little straighter. “Perhaps it is my taste in literature?”

“For that, I believe we are in agreement,” Benedict said, grabbing a fresh glass from the table beside him. “May I offer the lady a beverage?”

“Only if you decide to share whatever’s in that pocket of yours,” she pointed to his chest. Benedict’s ears went pink. “Do not think I did not see you pour an added flavoring into the lemonade—it seems impolite that you would neglect to share.”

“It would be impolite,” Benedict said, carefully pulling his flask out of his coat. “I am surprised you saw that, though, given the crowded room.”

“You are a tall man, Mr. Bridgerton,” she said, taking the glass from his hand. Benedict poured a healthy amount of clear liquor into her cup before adding the rest to his own. “I would have found it hard to ignore you.”

“Your first season? I presume?”

“Technically,” she said, looking up into his blue eyes. “My family, we just moved to Mayfair. My father came into some money and relocated us here this year, my brother is set to study at Eton in the fall.”

“And you?”

“I am now expected to marry a rich and eligible bachelor,” she laughed into her glass. “Which I really have no problem doing, save for the fact that gentleman is nothing like Mr. Whitehill.”

“Mr. Whitehill is rather rich,” Benedict smirked. “Would that not placate you?”

“And listen to him dribble about Byron? Perish that thought,” she said. “When I do marry, I expect my husband to be of the same mind, a similar taste in the arts.”

“You know,” Benedict nearly whispered, “that is an admirable thought. But how will you find this man?”

She looked him up and down, quickly and all at once, returning to drink from her glass.

“I suppose I will know when I find him,” she smirked.

Benedict smiled back. “Well, please let me know when you do, I feel rather invested in your prospects.”

“You will be the first to know, I assure you,” Miss (Y/L/N) said, nodding her head. “But, if I may be so bold, if you are not currently preoccupied, would you care to further our discussion on Byron? It is hard to find someone who agrees with such a… contrasting opinion of the poet.”

“Why, Miss (Y/L/N),” Benedict finished his glass, offering his arm, “I was afraid you’d never ask.”

—

The gardens on the property were lovely, so lush and full of life. She made good on her promise to keep them well maintained, only keeping the finest blooms and plants in their care. It was always the perfect place to spend time on days like today, sunny, a gentle breeze. 

They had given the governess a day off, her mother had fallen ill, it was the least the Bridgertons could do for her.

“Mother!” 

The lady looked up from her book, eyes meeting with her eldest daughter. Blue eyes, just like her father.

“Yes, darling?”

“Might I go inside to grab other books? Aunt Eloise recently sent some to Father and I want to read them.”

The lady gave her daughter a trying look. “Do you not think they may be above your comprehension level, my love? They were intended for your father, after all.”

“No need,” a looming voice bellowed. “I have them right here.” 

She didn’t need to look up to know who it belonged to. “Benedict, I thought you were spending time in the studio this afternoon.”

“And miss spending time with my darling wife and children?” Benedict grinned, the crooked way she fell in love with. “That seems foolish on my part.”

“Father!” Their eldest exclaimed, running over to the tallest Bridgerton. “You brought the books?”

“Indeed,” Benedict nodded, handing the parcel off to his daughter. “Aunt Eloise thought we may have better use of these than her and Phillip do.”

Their daughter lit up with excitement—ever the reader, she was. It took a village to keep their library stocked with appropriate books for her age, but she was quickly out-reading her entire family’s collection. “Thank you, Father!”

“Well,” Benedict said modestly, “you must write to your Aunt Eloise and thank her, I had little to do with such a gift.”

“What about me, papa?” 

Their son, only a few years younger than their daughter came bounding up past his escaping sister, clearly having been playing in the mud. “Do I have any gifts from auntie?”

(Y/N) opened her arms. “Not this time, sweetheart, but come here, let mama wipe that dirt off of your nose—” 

“No!” He exclaimed, turning from his mother. “Dirt makes me ruggable—like Uncle Colin!”

“Rugged,” Benedict corrected gently. “And, no, dirt makes you dirty. You need to stop spending so much time with Colin…”

“Once baby brother is here I will,” their son nodded, putting both hands on his hips, looking down at his sitting mother.

“Oh darling,” (Y/N) said, trying to raise to her feet. Benedict quickly offered his hands, pulling her up. “Baby will not be here for a few more months.”

“Then more time with Uncle Colin!”

Benedict and (Y/N) sighed, watching their adventurous son run back to the mud. “We must write Colin, tell him of the monster he has created.”

“Our eldest is such an easygoing flower,” Benedict said, noting how she was carefully skimming through the various books on her lap. “Our son tests our patience.”

“And how do you think this one will be?” (Y/N) asked, placing his hand on her swelling stomach. She only had two or so more months until the delivery, if she had been correct on the conception. The latest Bridgerton wedding seemed to be the culprit, stolen kisses and a romantic rendezvous to the greenhouse away from the party—it was a perfect recipe for baby number three. “Calm and collected? Devilish and adventurous?”

“I pray they are just like their mother,” Benedict rubbed her belly affectionately. “And perhaps a bit more behaved than their brother… I suppose I should also write my mother an apology.”

“Whatever for?”

“I reckon my brothers and I acted much like our son,” Benedict said sheepishly. “Acting like Bridgerton boys, I am afraid.”

“As if that is the only explanation,” she giggled, leaning into his side. “But I am sure your mother would appreciate such a gesture. Perhaps you should send her a bouquet from our garden, too?”

“An excellent idea, my love,” Benedict said, pressing a kiss to her temple. “What a brilliant mind you have.”

“Father, Mother!” Their daughter called out, waving them towards her. “Aunt Eloise sent a book by an author I have never heard of before.”

“Oh?” Benedict quirked his brow, walking with his wife over to her. “And what author may that be?”

“A Lord Byron,” she said, showing the book with a deep brown cover to her parents. Benedict scooped the tome quickly from his daughter’s grasp, holding it close to his chest.

“And you shall never read such filth,” Benedict said seriously.

“Oh Benedict,” (Y/N) laughed. “Perhaps we should allow our daughter to expand her mind—come to her own conclusions on the matter? Surely Aunt Eloise meant the gift in kind.”

“Aunt Eloise clearly meant to send it as a cruel prank,” Benedict corrected.

“What is so wrong with that author, Father?”

“A shorter conversation would be what is not wrong with this author,” Benedict said, turning to call his son. The little boy ran over to his father’s side, ever eager. “Take this and bury it, preferably far away from here.” His wife could not stop her laughter, watching their son hurriedly run over to the new rose bushes, making good work at digging a deep enough hole for the book. “You,” Benedict pointed at the girl, “are forbidden to read anything written by that lowly man.”

“Oh Benedict,” (Y/N) admonished, trying hard to stop her laughter, “forbidding her from reading seems silly—”

“Are we not of the same mind on Byron?” Benedict asked. “I rather think that is how we met, is it not, dearest wife?”

She pursed her lips, fighting a smile. “We are.”

“Besides,” Benedict stood a little straighter, “the roses could use a bit more sustenance.”

She could only roll her eyes.

[fictionadventurer]

Top ten fairytale retelling novels/novellas you've read.

I've already answered my top 10, so here's my shot at listing 11-20.

11. A Long, Long Sleep by Anna Sheehan: Would probably be higher on the list if I'd remembered it in time. Sci-fi story that's a very loose retelling of "Sleeping Beauty", but so rich and emotionally devastating.

12. Maid and Minstrel and The Beggar Prince by Kate Stradling: Putting both of her short "King Thrushbeard" retellings in one entry. The first is more of a "Beauty and the Beast" tale that makes both leads decent people caught up in a misunderstanding, but I appreciated how it (probably accidentally) made me see the Christ-imagery inherent in the original. The second gives King Thrushbeard some character flaws and a good arc, and has an excellent explanation for why the princess didn't want to marry any of her suitors.

13. Fairest by Gail Carson Levine: Snow White retelling set in the world of Ella Enchanted, and retains that book's creativity in adapting the fairy tale elements. Has an excellent full-cast audiobook.

14. The Stepsister and the Slipper by Nina Clare: Georgette-Heyer-esque Cinderella retelling. Very rushed ending, and not the kind of romance I'd advise anyone to pursue in real life, but very fun.

15. Soot and Slipper by Kate Stradling: Cinderella retelling with an excellent twist, adorable characters, and a convoluted ending.

16. Before Midnight by Cameron Dokey: Short and basic Cinderella retelling that gets on the list because I have extremely fond autumnal associations with this book.

17. Unseen Beauty by Amity Thompson: A "Beauty and the Beast" retelling from the point-of-view of one of the invisible servants. Since I'd had that idea for years before finding this, I was thrilled to find that this story does a pretty good job with it.

18. Exile by Loren G. Warnemuende: The first book in a trilogy that retells "Maid Maleen". I haven't finished the series yet, so maybe it's unfair to put it on here, but I loved the section of the story that takes place in the tower, so I couldn't leave it off the list.

19. The Seventh Raven by David Elliot: A retelling of "The Seven Ravens" that does a decent job of retelling the fairy tale, but I mostly love it as a very well-structured novel-in-verse that structures each POV character's poems with their own poetic form.

20. The Tales of Ambia by Allison Tebo: Fun, slightly Wodehouse-ish retellings that are a breath of fresh air in the romantasy-dominated world of indie retellings

Honorable Mentions:

The Lunar Chronicles by Marissa Meyer: Objectively as stories, these should be pretty high up on the list. It had great characters and adapted the fairy tale elements in some amazing ways. But I'm not a fan of a lot of the worldbuilding elements here, so I couldn't bring myself to rank it above some of my beloved, but more-flawed indie retellings.

With Blossoms Gold by Hayden Wand and Sweet Remembrance by Emily Ann Putzke: Both contained in Once: Six Historical Fairy Tale Retellings. The first is "Rapunzel" set in Renaissance Italy with an agoraphobic Rapunzel, and the second is a beautifully devastating retelling of "The Little Match Girl" set during WWII. I haven't read these in a long time, but I remember them both being very good.

Masque by W.R. Gingell: An excellent "Beauty and the Beast" retelling with a very lively Beauty, a Beast who works as a police detective instead of brooding in a castle, and some clever adaptations of the fairy tale elements. Unfortunately, I've decided a couple elements of the magic go beyond what I'm comfortable with, so I couldn't put it on the list, but I had to give it credit.

[stjohnstarling]

Hello! Love 'What Manner of Man'! It inspired me to make my own vintage gay story myself!

But I'm having an issue with outlining, since outlining a novel feels more close-ended than a longer-form serial novel is.

Do you have any advice? Or resources, etc?

So you have no way of knowing this, but I am actually obsessed with story structure. It’s maybe the part of storytelling I’ve spent the most time consciously working with, so sorry in advance because I’m about to go on a dubiously helpful monologue. It’s a bit tricky for me to answer about resources, since the things I used when I was learning have been lost to the sands of time. That being said I have a couple pieces of advice:

If you don’t know what you’re doing, don’t be afraid to find a template. I wish I could link you a good one but I don’t have any on hand. When I was first learning to write novels, I actually found a few different standard novel structure templates and used them to outline a bunch of novels I never intended to write, as practice. Bad and silly ones that were just fun to play with, where there was no pressure to write anything I’d ever want anyone to see. My background is in music, so my instinct when I don’t know how to do something is to isolate that element and practice it on its own, and it’s never steered me wrong.*

But more than that - what you’re feeling as closed-ended is that you’re trying to write a story with structure, as opposed to one that is mostly improvised. I remember feeling this too, when I first started exploring writing novels, but this is one of those cases where limitations are actually what gives you freedom.

Structure is part of the artistry of storytelling - just like poetry has forms like sonnets and sestinas, and songs have verses, bridges, and choruses. You know intuitively the structure of a pop song, and that heightens the pleasure of listening to one as you anticipate the build up to the chorus. Stories are like this too. The structure is an important part of the audience’s enjoyment of the final piece, whether they know it or not.

I’ll give an example. Season one of AMC’s The Terror is a piece of fiction that is structured with some serious artistry, above and beyond just good craftsmanship, its structure is a crucial part of how it creates meaning. As a result a lot of what its fans do is analyze it for parallels in its storytelling. I don’t think many of them would articulate what they enjoy about it as “this is a well structured story,” but the structure is actually one of the main things the fandom engages with.

More than any writing resource, the best way to learn is to study and analyze stories you admire - why things are put in a certain order and why events fall at the points in the story that they do. When are you anticipating, when are you experiencing catharsis, where in the story do those things happen? Explore widely! You don’t have to limit yourself to novels! Movies are great for getting a basic understanding of how you can structure a story because the time and space requirements they’re subject to mean movies tend to be very rigidly structured. There’s no time to mess around like there is in long forms of fiction like novels.

I encourage you to embrace structure as a part of the art and a potential tool for expression and beauty! I can’t tell you how rewarding it is.

*I am aware that this advice does not work for a lot of people, so if it doesn’t work for you that is also perfectly fine! Everyone is different.

[theyungihven]

The Demon's Infatuation • Sex Demon Yunho

CHAPTER 2

↬ pairing: dom demon yunho x sub female reader

↬ genre: smut, romance

↬ warnings: breeding kink, cream pie, pain kink, unprotected sex, hip bruises, biting kink, slut-shaming, choking kink, hard core dom yunho, yunho is OBSSESSED,

↬ word count: 1.2K+

↬ author’s note: this full novel length fic is a dedication to my boyfriend alex and the demon that visited me at night two years ago every full moon night

Summary : She's just an innocent heartbroken girl who just wants to be loved for once despite her flaws and imperfections and he's a wicked demon who wants nothing but to corrupt her soul to till all she can think of him. What can go wrong if he takes a little interest in her? Heaven along with Hell are not going to collide with the Earth, or will they?

MASTERLIST

TAGLIST : @yunhogrippers @haram-monbebe @atinism @yvnhoos @st4rhwa @lomons

“So I teleported near the old city. And then, I got this strong whiff of blood.” I tell San.

We sit under the neon lights on the barstools as we rest our hands on the bar counter. The brown wood creaks under my weight, a reminder of its ancientness

I feel the bartender’s eyes widen with every word I say, as if he’s a columnist and writes the infamous gossip column catered to making the most scandalous secrets known to hell’s residents.

However, I don’t care enough and continue about my latest endeavour to a very uninterested San. The fellow demon looks like he will jump into the holy water any moment, if given the chance to cease his existence.

“I saw a girl on her knees begging someone to love her.” I say and a small smile greets his lips. “She looked delicious and I’m telling you, she smelled sweeter than an elixr.” I continue and the bartender bends down to access the lower cabinets of the counter, all while his eyes stay hooked in my direction.

“And what’s better than trapping a human in distress? So I thought, why not make my presence known? And then, mate,” I chuckle as I remember the moment she ran inside and the look that crowned her face when she noticed my shadow form, “she has the audacity to recite verses, but she couldn’t even do that right.”

“Humans are pathetic, I'm telling you." Dante agrees with me as he smiles a little, his lips thinning but not even curling a degree up whatsoever for some reason unknown to me. My heart skips a beat as my smile drops.

The clitter clatter of the glass and the chatter of the demons inside the infamous club Hell’s Inferno is constant, with fights erupting every now and then, like an active volcano.

However, today, it is eerily quiet in the dead of a full moon night.

It is unusual, but I enjoy the bourbon in my hands.

I swirl it around while taking a little peek at my dear friend, San who is playing with the end of his tail. He looks very odd today, as if he has fucked up real bad and is now going to be banished from hell. His skin looks pale as if he’s losing his colour from malnutrition.

However, as from the latest gossip and news about the duo’s latest adventures also according to the not so quiet whispers, celibacy isn’t the case.

“Mate, you look like you prevented a sin.” I say, as I place my bourbon glass on the counter and stare at him. Nothing but worry fills my heart.

“Nothing.” he replies lifelessly as if he has given up on reality and accepted defeat.

“Then, the fuck is wrong with you?” I scream.

Everyone in the club looks at me as if I tempted a human to commit a good deed.

I take a deep breath in order to calm myself down and then say,

“How’s your girl, San?”

“urm…she’s doing…umm…well!” Dante shutters. He then gulps his drink all the way and stares at the glass.

My suspicions and the word of mouth which had travelled to me earlier this week were indeed true.

Dante did associate with an angel, committed treason and is next on line to getting banished from hell.

“You fucked up big time, mate.” I chuckle as I say, swallowing the bitterness on my tongue which attempts to slip but I don't want to hurt Dante anymore.

“I know, I know…” Dante sighs. He then takes a deep breath as he corrects his posture.

“I FUCKING KNOW OKAY!” He slams the glass on the table as he stares at me dead in the eye.

“What are you going to do with this girl though?” Wow, now I am the main focus of the conversation. I look up at Dante as I lick my lips, refreshing my memory at all things I’ve been thinking to do with her.

“Tempt her, seduce her, get so deep into her mind” I say as I swirl the drink which the bartender refilled in order to infiltrate our privacy.

I gulp down the whole thing in one go and slam it on the table.

“That she’d desperately crave me like a drug.” I finished, and Dante’s reaction to my words is magnificent. He looks like a human when they see me in my demon form for a split second in the corner of their room as I give them my charismatic smile.

“But how?” Dante asks as he looks at me all confused.

I get up from the barstool and walk closer towards Dante.

“Good things take time, my dear.” I pat Dante's shoulder as I continue, “but wonderful things…” I lean in as I whisper into his ear, “takes a good strategy and patience.” I say, then lean back, flashing him my trademark smile as I turn around and make a dramatic exit which leaves everyone gasping.

[wyrmyblog]

Hey everyone! I thought I would share the love a little by making a post reccing some of my favourite GO fics. In no particular order:

The Other Arrangement; or How the Angel Got so Hungry by burnttongueontea

This is a canon-verse fic in which Aziraphale has had an eating disorder for thousands of years, and moving in with Crowley after the events of s1 makes it worse. The fic tells the story of his struggles over time, as well as how Crowley helps him to recover in the present day. it's very psychologically realistic, sweet and satisfying.

Blood of the Lamb (and other sacrifices) by PeniG

I am really weak for human AU's and I love a good outsider POV. This amazing fic alternates between both! one half of the fic is a lovely historical human AU set in the early 20th century, and the other half is a murder mystery told in the style of a golden age detective novel (specifically as fanfic of the Miss Silver novels by Patricia Wentworth).

Resurgam by HolRose

This fic has all the set-dressings I normally love, being a historical human AU, but more importantly it has wonderful characterization for Aziraphale. As our POV character, it is a pleasure to live inside his head for a little while. His gentle dignity, warmth, and slightly world-weary, self-deprecating humour make him a top-tier Aziraphale, in my professional opinion.

The End of an Era by Balder12

the Cold War spy subtext was incredibly strong in the book, and it's something i missed in the TV show adaptation. Though many authors (including myself) have had a go at a spy AU, this one, with its pervasive sense of gloom and meditation upon how spying wastes a person's life, has always been my favourite.

Shifting Heaven and Earth by BuggreAlleThis

This is, in my opinion, the best fic in the fandom. I mean, I haven't read them all. but I'm deeply skeptical that anyone else has managed to write something this good. Not only is the fic filled to the brim with the level of historical, material, and philosophical detail that truly makes the characters believable as angels, not only is the plot tight, compelling, and satisfying, not only is the premise extremely interesting, not only is the prose consistently gorgeous, but the characterization is absolutely phenomenal. BuggreAlleThis manages to write an AU Crowley who is extremely different from canon and who undergoes a massive character arc, all while seeming to still be "him". And Aziraphale in this fic is everything that an Aziraphale should be. He is sweet and excitable, yet worn-down by his long, difficult life. Riven with inner conflicts, warmly loving of all God's creatures, incisively intelligent, passionately spiritual, well-read and knowledgeable, and at his core, deeply human.

[qiutls]

TNGDH 021

After doing it a few times during the festival, it was now easy to avoid Kyle's eyes and turn into a person. In the first place, except for that day when I met with Sen, I've been spending hours together with him, so I had no time to worry about getting caught.

"You're a magician?"

"Yes, but I'm not that talented, I just do this and that..."

"I see."

I drank the tea and ate the scones he prepared while I lied nonchalantly.

I'm sorry for lying but it's better this way, just in case I need a cover-up in the future.

If Kyle goes on an expedition, there would be a good excuse to accompany him. If he goes on to subjugate demonic beasts as written in the novel, as a magician, I can go with him.

"Rather than that, can you really spend time with me like this? Don't you have any work to do?"

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No....."

I'm not making you leave ah. I'm just wondering if you're really this free. It seems like the grand duke has a suspicion disease after I disappeared unexpectedly twice.

I turned my head, slightly guilty at the situation. Then his hand reached out and turned my face back to look at him.

"It's polite to look at each other's face while talking."

"I'm sorry I'm a man who isn't well versed in aristocratic manners."

"You should learn from now on."

"Why should I?"

He came closer and whispered.

"Aren't you my companion?"

A sin committed once lasts a lifetime. I looked at him miserably.

'How many times has it been now?'

Even beef bones won't be used as much as Kyle uses this companion comment. He has been using it to blackmail me whenever I tried to avoid answering his questions or to leave early.

You're someone who died without a companion in the original novel. Is that why you're obsessed with companions? To be honest, it's not that you didn't want to date anyone, it's that you couldn't right?

My mouth was itching to shoot back the comment at him but I forced myself to hold it in. Kyle who has been staring at me suddenly let out an airless laugh. He had a strange yet comforting smile plastered on his face. His bright expression pulled me in and before I knew it I had been staring at him as well.

"I feel comfortable with you."

"....."

"I know it probably sounds strange, don't think too much about it."

I have nothing to say if you tell me those words with such a soft smile.

Are you doing this on purpose?

I couldn't do anything except stare at him, I only came to my senses when he offered another scone to me.

"Since you're a magician, can you take a look at my magical beast? You can take a look at it whenever you're free."

I was about to bite into the scone then stopped after hearing Kyle's unexpected words.....That's strange. Did you just ask me, to take a look after.....ME?

I put down the scone and asked him again, this time listening with full attention.

"...What?"

"I asked if you could take a look at the magical beast I'm raising in the study."

I guess I didn't hear it wrong.

Looking alternately at the scone in my hand and at Kyle, my appetite dropped. Even though the desert looked delicious, I felt like I would get an upset stomach if I ate it now.

But Kyle didn't seem to mind my actions and continued pensively.

"I'm worried because he doesn't seem to have any appetite recently. And he's been lazy as well. He used to be a very active guy..."

Don't edit your memories ah! When have I been active? Apart from running on the wheel in order to get the skill, I was always lying down! You don't even know your own hamster.

"I think it's because, it's already in the growing stage, yet there's no signs of a mana stone forming inside him. I decided to periodically inject magic power (mana) as advised by the doctor but..."

".....Magic power?"

What's this? Who told you to do that?

"Since it's inevitable that it will suffer from the mana injected, I thought it would be a good idea to let you meet it and see if you can help."

"What...."

What? What's this situation?!

I can't even say no to his requests..... I closed my mouth and urgently called the system.

Hey! HEY! Hurry up and come here!

[ ……(*￣０￣)ノ ]

Why do you look like you've just woken up? I clenched my fist and looked at the blue system window in front of me.

'Hurry up and navigate to the Fruit Store or whatever it's called!'

[ ……. ] [ ……. ] [ ☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆ ] [ The Nut Store! ]

After a bit of loading, the shiny emoji came into my vision. I clicked my tongue upon seeing the decorated sign below it. Don't you get tired doing all of this?

I ignored the small letters that said renewal open and quickly scanned the store.

[ Mini mini Brazil Nut Madeleine, consumes 2% miracle value, in turn your body gets smaller for 30 minutes. It's even smaller than a hamster! ]

[ Hurried Almond Financier, consumes 3% miracle value, in turn you're able to run faster than usual. ]

Give me something useful please, what's the point of these items ah? If I wanted to be small, I'll just turn back into a hamster.

I finished reading page 1 and was about to turn into page 2 when I heard Kyle sigh.

"A magician, you say..."

"What are you thinking about, Your Highness?"

"I just thought, it's quite a relief."

"Why?"

"There has always been a shortage of magicians in the Blake estate. It hasn't been long since I became the leader, and I've had a lot of accidents at the Wyvern nest survey last year."

He looked at me expectantly.

No, I can't think of an excuse. Stop looking at me with such a face. How am I supposed to hold my ground, my expression turned to guilt. 

I moved my hand to cover his eyes, but of course my feeble efforts were rendered useless in just three seconds as Kyle held my wrist in place.

"The work at the estate is hard. I'm really so busy these days."

I made a vague excuse first, just in case he asks for another favor.

Even though the "Summon" skill was upgraded, it was only up to two hours. I can't do much with the time I'm given, and it's not like I can lie everyday that I need to go to the bathroom before I disappear again.

"....Is that so?"

Kyle's face was tinted with disappointment. I felt apologetic seeing this unfamiliar expression on him.

Why are you so disappointed ah? I'm a fake magician who can't even do basic spells. The only spell I know is how to turn into your hamster, Cashew Nut.

'Can you even consider that as a magic spell?'

The system just transforms me back and forth.

In any case, it's better to find a magician who's actually knowledgeable, rather than choosing me. But still... If you're this disappointed.

I added gently, as if teeming with good intentions.

"There's still enough time to look for magicians before the demonic beasts' subjugation expedition happens."

There was something that came to mind after I said that sentence.

The Northern festival was held during the coldest and darkest days of winter. After this tumultuous atmosphere, the Blake estate started preparing for a massive reconnaissance.

There are many reasons for this reconnaissance, the main purpose was to bring back the vigilance that was loosened during the festival. It was a reminder that no matter how good the life in the North is, it is still a dangerous place full of demonic beasts.

Another reason is probably the training of the newly inaugurated knights. At this time of the year, knights who were apprentices in the past will get to experience combat since their inauguration.

"The ceremony for the new knights....."

Kyle replied slowly,

"We did it during the festival, I remember it was pretty big this year since there was a lot of new recruits."

"Haha... I think I was pretty busy back then."

Kyle glanced at me suspiciously. I know I didn't have anything to be busy about, but just forget about it, let's move on! I ignored his piercing gaze as I recounted the events.

A knight's inauguration that was larger than usual.

The chandelier dropping in the middle of the banquet.

And then, a large scale reconnaissance.

I'm pretty sure at this time, Kyle...

[ The Duke of Blake is attacked during the reconnaissance and suffers a heavy injury on his right arm. ]

The system narrated the content from the original novel.

I asked a question quietly. 

'Will this injury, affect how he dies?'

After a moment of silence, the system answered succinctly.

[ That's right. ]

The sentence shone brightly in blue and it gave me chills. His fated death struck me with renewed vividness.

'Right...'

Kyle's death is now just 15 days away.

According to the original story, he started to confront Belial through the chandelier incident, and was attacked at the reconnaissance. Then he was stabbed to death by a strong man at his own castle.

Just because I changed a small part of the plot, doesn't mean I changed his fate entirely. Miracles don't happen that easily.

What now... What should I do?

"Hey."

"....."

"Shu."

"....."

"Shu!"

Kyle put his palms around my cheeks and I came to my senses when his cold hands touched my skin.

"Ah."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

I took a quick breath and tried to move my stiff fingertips.

"I'm alright."

He didn't seem to believe my words, but he didn't pressure me into confessing.

"I was just thinking about something for a moment."

Kyle frowned at my words.

"What were you thinking about that made you so pale?"

I couldn't answer honestly so I just shut my mouth.

Come to think of it, I always avoided his questions this way. Either I start talking fast, saying random excuses or I just shut up entirely. It must look suspicious.

But it can't be helped. Anyways, I changed the subject as naturally as I could and leaked the plan I had in mind in advance.

"Your Highness, may I follow you on this large-scaled reconnaissance?"

He answered straight away, as if it was not a difficult decision.

"Sure, but have you ever been outside the territory?"

"No."

"The north is much more dangerous than you think. At the snowfield, humans are the first learn how weak they are."

"....."

The outside, is entirely different from the Blake estate, as the grand duke described.

I gulped down and looked him in the eye.

"It will all be alright if Your Highness is there to protect me."

Protect me, Kyle, and I'll protect you. You might not know, but our fates are linked. Our survival depends on each other.

Kyle whispered back.

"Do you trust me?"

"Isn't it natural that the people of this land trusts you?"

"I know."

He said with a mischievous smile on his face.

"But I was asking you."

Acting like a hooligan. You already know the answer.

I squinted at him, pretending to look hateful.

"Of course."

"All right, I'll be responsible in protecting you, but, how are your horseback riding skills?"

"Ah."

Well how should I explain this... During our school trip, they went to Jeju Island and everyone rode a pony, but I was left behind doing homework at school.

Before I could answer anything, he added.

"Actually, it would be difficult to ride alone with your injury."

Fortunately, he didn't seem to think of leaving me behind.

But wait, what? Don't tell me? You're thinking of giving me a ride?! In front of all the new recruits??? Wait, no!

'.....Should I not have told him that I wanted to join?'

I bit my lips in order to calm down the goosebumps on my arms.

"....Thank you for being considerate, Your Highness."

When he leaves, I must learn horseback riding immediately!

t/n : longest chapter yet! thank u for all the ko-fis~ also posting twice today since I might not be able to do so tomorrow!

[fabbyf1]

Regarding that consent reblog: I appreciate the way you handle consent, education and kink in your fics so much! I love kink in fics, I love fics that are deep dead dove territory, but nothing makes me nope out more quickly than a story that has dubious consent or rape, but doesn't address it narratively or even downplays it. I read a published erotica novel recently that a friend recommended and I was close to tears by how upsetting I found the way it dealt with consent. I have no issue with reading rape, and do read it occasionally, but I find it fucked up when non-consensual situations are downplayed to something just slightly toxic, but acceptable. After that, I had even more appreciation for how you write. Specifically the warming verse made me re-evaluate how I would approach certain kink conversations with a partner. So, thank you!

tl;dr kate's rambling again but this time about consent

😭😭😭 thank you for writing all this out, bestie. this was very well said and i'm so glad that you enjoy the way i handle consent/kink in my fics!

i know not everybody likes talking about it, and clearly some people don't want it in fics at all (though i don't think they're readers of mine. i've received a lot of weird anon hate and "constructive criticism" over the years and never once has it been like "ew you write too much consent" lmfao) but it's always nice to know that people are enjoying the way i write it.

believe it or not, i never set out to be a smut writer 😂 if you go back to the very beginning of my ao3 history, i reallllllly struggled with smut at first. my first dabble into smut was in my 1D fic (which has little to no smut) and it took me ACTUAL MONTHS to write one scene. it just wasn't something i ever saw myself doing. but even though this is fanfiction and not all that serious, i still feel responsible to make it as realistic as possible.

mostly because that's what i like to read, but partly because... i think it's important people read it.

it's easy to get sort of... lost in ao3 kink/smut/dead dove stuff when you're consuming SO much of it (or too much of it) which sort of goes in line with what you were saying about non-consensual situations being downplayed to something just slightly toxic.

i feel (personally. this is different for everyone, but i'm sure some people can relate) you can easily get into a bad place where the lines of reality start to blur and you can almost... forget? that there's a difference between fanfic smut and real life sexual encounters. and i never want any of my readers to forget that they should ALWAYS advocate for their safety, for their consent, and for any other thing my characters talk about.

i never want any of my readers to go out looking for a kinky relationship (especially if they only realized they might be into that from reading my fics) and forget to protect themselves. because their safety is more important to me than views. it is more important to me than pleasing random anons who are just looking to get off and not reading the full story. and it is definitely more important to me than ao3 kudos.

i'm 33 years old, and i've found myself in too many situations in my life where i haven't always felt heard or safe in my surroundings. and if i can gentle-parent my readers into always remembering that consent is sexy and that their safety is valid and important and not worth leaving out of a silly fanfiction, than i can sleep soundly at night.

thank you.

[jamtlandsarkiv]

I think it's so interesting that you headcanon Linnea to represent science. Myself, I'm really convinced that Björn has always been a natural science guy. He would have definitely had a lab at various points, or at least have owned a lot of scientific instruments, which works well with the apparently canonical thing that glass-blowing is one of his hobbies.

In my 19th-century-verse, he would have been really into inorganic chemistry at first. Once he came to accept the existence of organic chemistry, like how the European scientific community took a bit of time to do so, that's what he would research about instead. It goes hand-in-hand with how much of the Second (?) Industrial Revolution was inspired by advances in Ochem.

I can still see how Linnea can represent The Liberal Arts™! These are just some of my ideas on Björn's interests :) I'd like to hear more about his involvement in industry as well.

I love your vision of them so much! The way I think is that their interests aren't split nicely into "arts" and "sciences", because let's be honest here, Sweden was not known for its artistic or scientific contributions until very recently. The continental European countries ran circles around us.

When I wrote about music and literature, I was actually thinking about Sweden's disproportionately large footprint in the world of modern pop music and crime literature. For the natural sciences, I was thinking of Linnea's namesake, the guy who invented that system of biological classification and is probably the most internationally famous Swede in history. What I meant was "Linnea is a fan of music contests, reads lots of crime novels and has outdoorsy hobbies like hiking, forestry studies and birdwatching".

Same with my Björn: his hobbies are electronics, computers, weightlifting and woodworking which are nice references to Sweden's largest industries today being tech, iron mining and timber. My Björn is a very non-academic kind of person who prefers to do things, not produce research papers and engage in long debates with other academics. I imagine that he ran his own construction and engineering business for most of history, while complaining about those "good for nothing scholars" who "sat in their labs all day pondering things that don't matter". In fact, I think this was one of the disagreements that contributed to his and Mathias' rivalry too, because Mathias is an academic person...

I didn't know about that canon tidbit about glassblowing, but it makes sense with my Björn being a very hands-on person, even if the material he likes to work with most is wood. I think he would be familiar with blacksmithing as well. The thought of academic Björn is something I never considered, but I think it's very interesting to hear about everyone's different interpretations!

[corvidgames]

#18 A Date With Death

A Date With Death, especially for being a free title, is a really smooth visual novel with great art and a fun story that never felt like it was dragging. I'm not massively well versed in the genre of Visual Novels, but after seeing ads for the game whilst it was in development and seeing that it was free I didn't see any issue in trying it out for myself :)

The seven-day setting of the plot was a little quick at times, I will admit, though with the game itself being a dating sim, I really can't judge it for that. The build up of the Grim Reaper from a begrudged "friend" to a lover in the route I ended up playing was cute and the dialogue options felt unique and fun.

Getting to make my own character with preferences in compliments, and an almost entirely customisable gender vs presentation system felt like a really neat feature for making the game appealing to a wider audience. It was nice to get to have a customised experience that best fit me, y'know.

I've heard that there's DLC in the works, which I'm excited to see if/when it releases, adding a bunch more days and interactions with Grim and seeing how the plot progresses after the ending.

Altogether I can't help but massively respect the dev for producing a fully fledged game with multiple endings and so many dialogue options all for free. There's very few complaints I can have other than the pacing because of that. It was short and sweet and I had a really good time with it.

Date of completion: 24/07/2024

Genre: Visual Novel/Dating Sim

Time to beat: 2hr 18mins

Level of completion: Main plot, 1 ending path reached

Trophies/Gamerscore: 11/17

1-100 rating: 70

Platform: PC/Steam

[ouroborealis-charnivore]

Crowley dying in s3

I wasn't sure how to start this meta. I've had this theory with possible (big possible) evidence sitting around for ages and I just didn't know what to do with the information.

After I'd already had this information, I only seen a hand full of others talk about it, but none have touched on it in the same way as the things I've found in my research.

So let's get on with it. For reference I'm going to tag @nightingalecottage and their lovely post here. I really recommend reading it. This theory only saw the light of day because of their post and I told them I would tag them with my meta since it lends a lot to it. And I promised myself that I would finish this for them.

Now for the meat and potatoes. I'll break it all down about how I found this information and how it might lend some theory about possible plot to s3.

This got really long so I put a cut.

-Silly narrator voice-

The facts were these.

To start I was doing research for a fic I'm working on and the details don't matter much but I'd planned to make my 'human' crowley a barrister. I was googling famous barristers for inspiration.

This lead me to wikipedia naturally as you do. And as I was looking over the list I saw this.

After seeing this name on the list of barristers in popular culture I had a mini freakout. Mainly because two things NG is a huge fan of Charles Dickens and A Tale of Two Cities is on the bookclub reading list. And I kept thinking why did this seem familiar and this is why.

A Tale of Two Cities is on the list of books that they recommend we read or were found in s2. So after I stopped freaking out I immediately went to the wiki page for this character. I wasn't too familiar with this book so I wanted to know more. As I was now super invested and intrigued. And found this.

Sydney Carton

I couldn't help be blown away by the similarities here between Sydney Carton and a certain depressed snake demon from s2. Morosely asking Shax on a bench in the first episode "What's the point of it all?"

For some context, in the novel Sydney Carton and his later best friend Charles Darnay share a striking semblance and are easily mistaken for each other. This is how Sydney is then able to make the switch with Darnay in the end saving his life.

This brings to mind of the lore that we know that Crowley and Aziraphale were once long ago one character and split into two. Also with the ideal casting choice that Terry Pratchett wanted one actor to play both roles. That would have been really interesting and funny. Also this plays into our favorite duo MS and DT having not worked together before because they were up for the same roles.

Let's move on to

Charles Darnay

Darnay resents his uncle's views much how Aziraphale resents certain aspects of heaven, but is never able to act on very much.

The note about Darnay being tutor of French made me chuckle considering what we know about Aziraphale being terrible at French. With that whole scene centered around it in s2.

Ok so we all are well versed and familiar with the famous Bastille scene. We all know the one and its clear the inspiration here for it comes from A Tale of Two Cities possibly.

Side note Darnay and Carton are both in love with Lucie here, but I posit that in the case of Good omens, Aziraphale is possibly both Darnay and Lucie. Making him the best friend and love intrest.

Lucie Manette

And finally why does any of this matter and what does this have to do with Crowley maybe dying in s3 you ask?

The one important detail in all of this is that at the end of the novel Carton heroically sacrificed himself to save his best friend and for the women he loves. He feels it gave him purpose and felt as if his life finally had meaning.

Two things here. The scene in which Carton swaps places with Darnay being able to pass as him well enough to save his life. Is very reminiscent of our Body Swap from s1. As well as the idea that in s3 this could also happen, but in the sense that Crowley does it to save Aziraphale's life. I clearly have no idea how s3 will play out.

Now I'm not saying that s3 will be as dramatic as all of this. It is still a comedy at its core. As others have touched on in meta and in nightingalecottage's post there are many little hints that point to the similarities and the idea that Crowley maybe doomed by the narrative. In a way, I personally don't think that Crowley's hypothetical death will be permanent. I just do not see that happening at all. A temporary death I could definitely see and it could also serve to show how much Crowley truly means to Aziraphale. The shock of it would maybe be similar to how Crowley thought he lost Aziraphale in s1 and could be a parallel.

In the end this is all speculation and theory. Either way the idea of it all makes me vibrate and I needed to finally share this with someone else. They wouldn't have recommended this book if there wasn't some sort of meaning here right? And its entirely possible I'm looking in the wrong direction.

Overall there are many parallels and similarities here between A Tale of Two Cities and certain parts of Good Omens, I'm sure I may have missed some and I just wanted to end this now before it gets too long. If you made it this far and have any other theories or something you want to add on to this please feel free to tag me. I release this into the void.

[silawastaken]

I love seeing people compare music to their favourite characters and go like 'oh yeah this verse might be this character... and then this one is the other one... and then this little bit here is them both honestly. Or something like that' because I HAVE gone through every taylor swift song on evermore and folklore and compared it to skk. Sorry to be autistic on the writing account, but this is a fanfic writing account and I'm writing my second novel length fic about them so what did you expect.

folklore/evermore are very canon skk, and verge into fanon and some songs are the reason for very specific head canons, or some of the ways I write the way they perceive each other. 1989... DON'T GET ME STARTED OMFG HAVE YOU EVER LISTENED TO BLANK SPACE? I THINK IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO NOT HAVE AND OMG IT'S SO SKK CODED LIKE WTF. I HAVE VERY FIRM OPINIONS ABOUT WHICH LYRICS ARE THEIRS. Also the vault tracks literally exist what more do you want from me. 'i think about jumping off of very tall somethings just to see you come running and say the one thing I've been wanting' okay dazai pack it up you did that already, beast exists. 'i call my mom sister she said that it was for the best remind myself the more i gave you'd want me less' yeah yeah chuuya we know he left you get over it, it wasn't personal(think that line could go for either of them but the other line 'the way you faded till i left' feels more Dazai personally). Plus suburban legends. For personal reasons I struggle to listen to song without SPIRALING FUCK YOU THAT ONE PERSON SEHDHSSJNS but very skk as well 'we were born to be national treasures' is very soulmates of them. And out of the woods screams them in fanfic when they try to get better. Red, straight away all too well. They both remember it all too well. All too well skk cover with switching vocals anyone? The last time. The one with gary lightbody. Underrated song, is my favourite on that album, and SO THEM. 'this is the last time you tell me ive got it wrong, this is the last time i wont hurt you anymore' because they're fated to be together and are constantly drawn to each other and yet keep HURTING EACH OTHER RAGH. also 'we are never getting back together' is pretty funny and nice when applied to them. also state of grace. any taylor song with a mild drop of religious imagery is them cause yeah. but 'i never saw you coming, and I'll never be the same'... okay pack it up, we don't have time for your yearning. 'you were never a saint' (dazai abt chuuya) 'and i loved in shades of wrong' (bc hes toxic and doesnt know how to healthily like people) 'we learned to live with the pain, mosaic broken hearts' (bc they continue anyway and stick it out, living with the pain of being bad for each other because of how deeply they care). I almost do. Dazai after leaving. moving on to more religion, holy ground. 'for the first time i had something to lose' 'and i guess we fell apart in the usual way, and the storys got dust on every page' AAAAAA IT'S THEM. Can't really speak on debut- but I've listened to our song and picture to burn and if picture to burn isn't a vengeful chuuya idk what is. BOY OH BOY SPEAK NOW.

excuse me. one moment.

Mine- literally a skk au

Sparks fly- 'the way you move is like a rainstorm and im a house full of cards, you're the kind of reckless that should send me running' that entire verse screams dazai's fascination with corrupted chuuya, and the whole song is well yeah

back to december- dazai when they reunite just trust me on it just trust me on it. the repetition was intentional, that's how serious i am. 'i go back to december all the time' 'I got back to december to make it all right'

speak now- might just be me but it really makes me think of teen skk in fanfic harbouring urges to ruin the others relationship for 'some reason. I don't know, seeing him with her just... irks me'.

the story of us- first verse is chuuya, second verse is dazai, and the third is them both because they're LOSERS and they LOVE EACH OTHER and FUCK I'm CRYING NOW. 'id tell you i miss you but i don't know how' EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED BASTARD.

enchanted- self explanatory. for more context, i really think it's from dazai's pov in this case, could probably be both, but dazai fell first and harder so it's really like god he's been in love ever since he got kicked into that wall he wants him around forever. He held Chuuya's hand in the fight with rimbaud and then had all those close moments in the manga and went home to lie on his bed kicking his feet and giggling don't lie. (god im still crying this isn't helping)

better than revenge- they're both pretty vengeful idk it makes me think of iwsynttr for some reason

haunted- chuuya pov. 'i thought i had you figured out, something's gone terribly wrong' 'stood there and watched you walk away from everything we had' they're so sad, but the general idea of chuuya thinking he has figured out dazai and knowing how he thinks and then dazai just leaves suddenly and he's like 'Wow! I thought i knew you. How do i forget this'. 'wont finish what you started' bringing chuuya into the mafia then leaving it.

last kiss- 'you told me you love me so why did you go away' chuuya pov again oh god it hurts why am i doing this to myself? 'never imagined we'd end like this, your name, forever the name on my lips' yep yep ow.

LONG LIVE.- LISTEN. TO. THE. SONG. AND TELL ME IT'S NOT DAZAI AND CHUUYA. I COULD DO A WHOLE ANALYSIS ON JUST THIS SONG. 'promise me this, that you'll stand by me forever, but if god forbid fate should step in, and force us into a goodbye...please tell them my name, tell them how the crowds went wild, tell them how i hope they shine, long live the walls we crashed through, i had the time of my life with you' FUCK IT'S DAZAI AN HE'S IN LOVE WITH CHUUYA AND DOESNT KNOW ODAS GONNA DIE YET, JUST THINKS HE DOESNT GET TO KEEP ANYTHING HE WANTS. FUUUUUCK. THEY'RE IN LOVE AND DAZAI WANTS IT REMEMBERED PLEASE I'M SO SAD.

anyway, i can't pretend I'm normal about skk anymore i haven't even covered fearless, reputation, lover or midnights please somebody encourage me to actually write full things dedicated to each album and the most fitting songs from said albums please i'll do it and plus i need to actually gather proof for my autism diagnosis appointment so this would be a good way to to that probably. anyway yeah this'll never make it out my drafts lol

[androgynealienfemme]

"The main justification for invalidating butch-femme is that its an imitation of heterosexual roles and, therefore, not a genuine lesbian model. One is tempted to react by saying "So what?" but the charge encompasses more than betrayal of an assumed fixed and "true" lesbian culture. Implicit in the accusation is the denial of cultural agency to lesbians, of the ability to shape and reshape symbols into new meanings of identification. Plagiarism, as the adage goes, is basic to all culture.

In the real of cultural identity, that some of the markers of a minority culture's boundaries originate in an oppressing culture is neither unusual nor particularly significant. For instance, in the United States certain kind of bead- and ribbon work are immediately recogniziable as specific to Native American cultures, wherein they serve artistic and ceremonial functions. Yet beads, trinkets, ribbons, and even certain "indian" blanket patterns were brought by Europeans, who traded them as cheap goods for land. No one argues that Indians out to give up beadwork or blanket weaving, thus ridding themselves of the oppressors symbols, because those things took on a radically different cultural meaning in the hands of Native Americans. Or consider Yiddish, one of the jewish languages. Although Yiddish is written in Hebrew characters and has its own idioms and nuances, its vocabulary is predominantly German. Those who speak German can understand Yiddish. Genocidal Germanic anti-Semitism dates back to at least the eleventh century. Yet East European Jews spoke "the oppressors language," developing in it a distinctive literary and theatrical tradition. Why is it so inconceivable that lesbians could take elements of heterosexual sex roles and remake them?

*

It is June 1987, and I am sitting in a workshop on "Lesbians and Gender Roles" at the annual National Women's Studies Conference. It is one of surprisingly few workshops on lesbian issues, particularly since, at a plenary session two mornings later, two thirds of the conference attendees will stand up as lesbians. Meanwhile, in this workshop the first speaker is spending half an hour on what she calls "Feminism 101," a description of heterosexual sex roles. Her point in doing this, she says, is to remind us of the origin of roles, "which are called butch and femme when lesbians engage in them." She tells us the purpose of her talk will be to prove, from her own experience, that "these roles are not fulfilling" for lesbians. She tells us that the second speaker will use lesbian novels from the 1950s to demonstrate the same thesis. And, indeed, the second speaker has a small stack of 1950s "pulp paperbacks" with her, many of them the titles that, when I discovered them in the mind-1970s, resonated for me in a way that the feminist books published by Daughters and Diana Press did not.

I consider for several minutes. I'm well versed in lesbian literature, particularly in the fifties novels, and don't doubt my ability to adequately argue an opposing view with the second presenter. I am curious to see if she will use the publisher-imposed "unhappy ending" to prove that roles make for misery. I also decide I'm willing to offer my own experience to challenge the first presenters conclusions- though I'd much rather sit with her over coffee and talk. She is in her midforties and, although she claims to have renounced it, still looks butch. Even if she speaks of roles negatively, she has been there and I want to hear her story. Then I look around me. Everyone is under thirty. There are a few vaguely butch-looking women present who'd very likely consider themselves to be as androgynous as everyone else, and not a single, even remotely femme-looking women besides myself. I recall Alice Walker's advice to "never be the only one in the room." Quietly, I get up and walk out. I go to no other lesbian presentations at the conference."

“Recollecting History, Renaming Lives: Femme Stigma and the feminist seventies and eighties" by Lyndall MacCowan, The Persistent Desire, (edited by Joan Nestle) (1992)

[mendimore]

Cdrama Reviews/Reccs Series 01: Mysterious Lotus Casebook (莲花楼)

SPOILER WARNING!!!! PROCEED WITH CAUTION ( will be talking about the plot and the ending so if you are spoiled that if not my problem in any way)

Mysterious Lotus Casebook, led by Chengyi, Zeng Shunxi(Joseph), and Xiao Shunyao, directed by Guohu and Ren Haitao, aired through summer 2023 and was one of the most popular cdramas to come out that summer.

Unfortunately I was a bit preoccupied falling down the Boy's Planet rabbit hole after being peer pressured to watch it to serve as moral support for a friend of mine and thus, being unintentionally dragged back into my kpop phase.

It was also because I had a hellish 14-hour work/study schedule 5-6 days a week during most of that summer meaning I could only have one hyperfixtation and watching five three-minute fancams was still a lot less time than rewatching a word of honor episode for the literal 14th time.

However, I am back and despite still being busy as hell, I have pulled three all-nighters (not in a row thank god) to finish this drama because it was heavily reccomended.

And needless to say, since I was able to sacrifice another decade of my life for it, it was pretty good.

I have not read the novel it was based on, I am only going off of what is in the actual drama.

For costume dramas, out of the big three platforms in the land of cdramas, youku, tencent, and iqiyi, I would say production quality-wise I prefer iqiyi, so that was one of the reasons I agreed to watch this drama. When it comes to Iqiyi, most of the time I don't feel taken out of the story by the production quality. Usually, I'm removed from from the illusion of the story by the story itself but that is another issue, particularly prevalent in productions with script with no source material or very low-quality source material.

The skin smoothing wasn't super excessive and the general look was pretty harmonious. No props that stood out strangely and few consistently or particularly awkward camera angles messed with the storytelling elements that I can remember. Pretty good for a Cdrama. The bar is a bit low, yes, but in the grand scheme of things it's not a badly produced drama, and it's pretty evident, that the people working on it cared at least a passing amount about those storytelling elements which I can wholly appreciate. And obviously, it's nowhere near a cinematic masterpiece, it did not lack the quick cuts of slow-mo, or the wide-face shots that are a certain pet peeve of mine in dramas, though I will say, it didn't bother me as much as it usually does. It had a certain martial arts film charm to it and generally sidestepped the tacky look that kind of editing or shots usually have, but nonetheless, the production has certain things to be desired. I would say the overall look/production quality definitely doesn't hinder the watching experience.

However, there was something that did set me off a bit. I am a Mandarin speaker myself. Listening to this drama was a bit awkward at times. Of course, If I can find them I will put on both Chinese and English subtitles, if not I will at least have one language of subtitles on so I don't have too much problem understanding what is going on, and this was no exception. but frankly, spending late nights in front of my computer screen trying to read subtitles has never been my favorite way to enjoy cdramas.

The line delivery in costume dramas has certain standards that contrast with contemporary dramas making it that much more difficult and important to the scene. My first victim is Zeng Shunxi, the actor for Tianji Manor's young master Fang Duobing. From what I understand Mandarin is not Joseph Zeng's first language, perfectly fine, but the problem is, in this drama, I can tell. There are plenty of instances where his delivery is majorly awkward, particularly for a Minister's son, he's supposed to be well-versed in literature and an eloquent young master but sometimes talks like the words don't fit his mouth and other times the words come out in form fitted lines of monotony that also feel strange to native speakers and particularly costume drama viewers. It's not the worst thing and if you only read subtitles you will probably not even notice because his emotions generally still translate pretty well and it's not like he is speaking noticeably slower than other actors or like a robot. there is just a lot of be desired in that standards of voice acting. I am not here to attack this man, the fact that he could play in his own voice through the whole drama as someone whose first language is not Mandarin is impressive, particularly because it is a costume drama so there is a whole other level of difficulty, plus his line delivery was not bad enough to prevent me from finishing this drama so do with that what you will. However, for the purposes of the story, I think getting a dubbing actor could have been a reasonable investment. Our other leading actor, Chengyi also has certain issues with line delivery, though arguably not as noticeable. His character is a reserved, tired person, secretive so it's generally in character for him to be quieter, calmer, and his cadence is mostly natural, but sometimes I really couldn't quite catch what he was saying. He likes to gloss over certain words, his ending sounds such as those with ng like jing or neng get ommited some of the time, and his overall delivery borders mumbly several times. Mumbly words said under your breath are acceptable as long as the words are heard clearly, but that is the problem, they aren't. Again, it likely will not be noticeable if you are only reading subtitles and it is not bad enough to ruin the moment or scene in most instanced but there are things to work on, definitely. These two actors have the most lines in the entire show which is why I'm making such a big deal about it, but for people that don't know mandarin, that don't hear the awkward cadence or can't understand whatever is being mumbled, it wouldn't be noticeable, however it was definitely a criticism I had.

However, breaking away from the complaints I would like to point out that I generally really liked the fighting choreography. Fighting choreos can be the highlight of wuxia dramas. Many martial arts cdramas nowadays bypass having to train their expensive idol actors and actresses in fighting choreo with stuff like special effects and camerawork, but the fighting sequences and swordsmanship sequences were all pretty well done. Special mention to Chengyi's performance for the Li xianyi/Li lianhua's swordplay sequences was very nicely done. His movements are fluid and generally crisp, fitting his character and are nice to watch and capture the scene. I think my favorite was the last time he practiced his sword, in front of a fire, in the moonlight but here were quite a few pretty breathtaking moments.

Did this drama make me sob my eyes out? Yes, several times. I do tend to cry at every little thing but I did have a long bawl about Li lianhua after I finished, and a couple of sore, dry-eye days after a long night of quietly crying in my bedroom. However, making me cry is only a facet of storytelling that I evaluate. Personally, for the story itself, I found it generally pretty easy to get roped and invested in. The case breaking stuff is usually interesting to me and this one certainly was, though I do think that the cases themselves were sometimes overly convoluted with quite a couple of logic holes because their line of reasoning was so long and complicated. The amount of hints that are thrown at you in small moments are pretty hard to keep track of, but I think that it the characters and their dynamic is charming and the resolutions to the cases and the characters' agency was still satisfying enough for me to follow them on their little detective cases, and obviously the conflict caused by Li Lianhua's identity was the main backbone of the story. Li Lianhua's attitude, his disillusionment, all very heartbreaking, I loved it. I have seen some people argue that Li Lianhua has no character development. He still pushes the people who love him away, he is still walking away from his problems, and hurts them which is true in some ways but I disagree with the fact that he has no development. He had this sudden and painful disillusionment, before the story that changed his worldview entirely and really before Fang Duobing comes along, he is hypercritical of himself, the ruthlessly unyielding, unforgiving part of Li Xiangyi is something he still carries with him. However, after meeting Fang Duobing who admired Li Xiangyi in a way that wasn't just putting him on this untouchable pedestal or making him an ideal kind of helped him remember and allowed him to go back to Sigu sect, put on those red robes and save Yun Biqiu with Fang Duobing supporting him the whole way. He ends up giving his old acquaintances and friends some closure even though he originally intended to leave it all exactly where it was ten years ago and, though, I think it was unfair the lack of closure that Fang Duobing got, in the end, Li Xiangyi resolved his story in a different way than he was going to. Of course, he still leaves everyone behind but he isn't exactly just walking away from all his problems anymore, he's helping them accept his inevitable outcome, wishing them a bright future and the life he won't get to have and that, though albiet subtle is still development.

Overall I think the cases were draggy and complicated, but not uninteresting and the real plot with digging up the main male lead's past was a pretty good point of intrigue. These episodes are like almost 50 minutes long though so to each their own. Acting, other than line delivery gets a pass for me. They were consistent believable characters with motives and consequences that made me care about them. The chemistry between the three leads was pleasant and harmonious. Their dynamic was clear, humourous, and entertaining, nothing to gawk at but seeing them fight together and interact definitely brought a smile to my face more than once.

As for the soundtrack, it was, as most of the rest of the drama, pleasant and fitting, but, nothing mindblowing. However, I am still listening to that soundtrack while I'm writing this and it has definitely grown on me.

One last thing, I did not get to the the entirety of the ending because I do not pay for iqiyi, however, I know the general idea of what it was. Personally, I am kind of glad I did not because I think the ending in the 40th video was more than enough. I know that they don't want to incur the wrath of all the emotional fans crying after the last video and believe me I was one of them, but giving him an ambiguous ending with a hint about him returning just doesn't sit right. Li Lianhua was a dead person, he spent ten years accepting his death. This story is about the freeing of Li Xiangyi from the cycles of vengeance and the death of the idle, wandering physician Li Lianhua. If Li Lianhua does not die, entanglement in the affairs of the world is inevitable and since Li Lianhua is now recognized as Li Xiangyi, they can no longer exist separately as they had been doing for ten years, because if they do, Li Xiangyi will be forced once again into the entanglements of vengeance, attachments, and worldly affairs which undermines his selflessness, self-loathing, righteousness, and bittersweet apathy. Even though this is not Di Feisheng's happy ending, and definitely not Fang Duobing's happy ending, this is Li Lianhua's happy ending, to die quietly, all his attachments to the world settled and left behind, in a small boat where he can rest peacefully and die where he was supposed to all those years ago, rocked by the current and forcing the people he has left behind to let go of him, as they should have done. He gave everyone as much closure as he could, and he gave himself control over his own death. As much as I want him to be alive, I don't think, for the purpose of the story that he should be or would be.

Anyways, I have grown way too attached to Li Lianhua, and keep rewatching the series to cope. Overall, I liked Mysterious Lotus casebook a lot, ti is definitely I would say worth the watch and even though it is not the most amazing or greatest thing in the world it has a special place in my heard and as kind of some closure for me, that is my review of the show, hope you liked it.

[shiroimoyashi]

Just have to post before I start loathing my own work. 4th attempt at digital art, so the coloring is still meh. Gotta find my own style first.

My OC Sumiya & Lars, going to the cinema together. I like to imagine them going to this type of sneak peek event that I tried myself, watching a movie that hasn't been released yet without even knowing what film it will be.

The air is filled with the smell of popcorn and excited whispers of moviegoers. Sumiya stumbled upon the sneak preview by chance, and he knew Lars would definitely be intrigued, given Lars' curious nature. As they settle down in their seat, their excitement is palpable. They don't know what they are in for, and that is part of the thrill.

"I bet it's an action film. Multi-verse has been all over the place lately." Sumiya says, leaning back in his seat and letting out a slightly exasperated sigh. "There's gotta be like, at least 10 more superhero movies with that trend waiting to be dropped."

"Multi-verse, huh?" Lars chuckles, turning to Sumiya with a grin. "You don’t seem too excited about that."

"Well, it was a novel idea at first. Just... overdone. I was hoping for something new."

"Hey, what about a romance movie? I haven't seen any decent one in a while. Maybe we'll stumble on a hidden gem." Lars rubs his chin, recalling some of the latest movies that he had seen.

Then, he nudges Sumiya lightly with his elbow, his aquamarine eyes sparkling with mischief. "Wanna bet? Loser has to buy the winner an ice cream."

The black-haired turns to his friend, his lips curled into a smile."Sure. Don't regret it when I'm the one getting that ice cream."

Lars raises an eyebrow, matching Sumiya’s competitive energy. "We'll see. Just be ready when I pick out the flavor."

The light starts to dim and they settle in, their mind still racing with the thought about the movie's genre.

Turns out that they both lose the bet, as it's a horror movie. It's comical how the two men flinch in their seat with each jumpscare. Lars tries to appear unfazed, but Sumiya knows full well how the blond is just as much of a scardy-cat as he is. They magically survive until the end of the movie and treat themselves to ice creams for that. And sure enough, they still attend the next preview to see who might win.

The end.

[revasserium]

the unofficial ultimate bungo stray dogs reading list

this is mainly for myself bc i rly do want to read most if not all of these and i'm sure it's already been done by someone somewhere. but, i thought why not post it lmao; most if not all of these can be found on anna's archive, z-library, or project gutenberg! (also, consider buying from your local bookstore!) for those that are a bit harder to find, i've included links, though some are from j-stor and would require login to access.

detective agency:

osamu dazai:

no longer human (novel)

the setting sun (novel)

nakajima atsushi:

the moon over the mountain: stories (short story collection)

light, wind and dreams (short story)

fukuzawa yukichi:

an encouragement of learning (17 volume collections of writings)

all the countries of the world, for children written in verse (textbook)

yosano akiko:

kimi shinitamou koto nakare (poem)

midaregami (poetry collection)

edogawa ranpo:

the boy detectives club (book series)

japanese tales of mystery and imagination (short story collection)

the early cases of akechi kogoro (novel)

kunikida doppo:

river mist and other stories (short story collection)

izumi kyouka:

demon lake (play)

spirits of another sort: the plays of izumi kyoka (play collection)

tanizaki junichirou:

the makioka sisters (novel)

the red roof and other stories (short story collection)

miyazawa kenji:

ame ni mo makezu; be not defeated by the rain (poem)

night on the galactic railroad (novel)

strong in the rain (poetry collection)

port mafia:

mori ougai:

vita sexualis (novel)

the dancing girl (novel)

nakahara chuuya:

poems of nakahara chuya (poetry collection)

akutagawa ryuunosuke:

rashoumon (short story)

the spider's thread (short story)

rashoumon and other stories (short story collection)

ozaki kyouyou:

the gold demon (novel)

higuchi ichiyou:

in the shade of spring leaves (biography and short stories)

hirotsu ryuurou:

falling camellia (novel)

tachihara michizou:

in mourning for the summer (poem)

midwinter momento (poem)

from the country of eight islands: an anthology of japanese poetry (poetry collection)

kajii motojirou:

lemon (short story)

yumeno kyuusaku:

dogra magra (novel)

oda sakunosuke:

flawless/immaculate (short story)

sakaguchi ango:

darakuron (essay)

the guild:

f. scott fitzgerald:

the great gatsby (novel)

the beautiful and the damned (novel)

edgar allen poe:

the raven (poem)

the black cat (short story)

the murders in the rue morgue (short story)

herman melville:

moby dick (novel)

h.p. lovecraft:

the call of cthulhu (short story)

the shadow out of time (novella)

john steinbeck:

the grapes of wrath (novel)

of mice and men (novel)

lucy maud montgomery:

anne of green gables (novel)

the blue castle (novel)

chronicles of avonlea (short story collection)

louisa may alcott:

little women (novel)

the brownie and the princess (short story collection)

margaret mitchell:

gone with the wind (novel)

mark twain:

the adventures of tom sawyer (novel)

adventures of huckleberry finn (novel)

nathaniel hawthorn:

the scarlet letter (novel)

rats in the house of the dead:

fyodor dostoevsky:

crime and punishment (novel)

the brothers karamozov (novel)

notes from the underground (short story collection)

alexander pushkin:

eugene onegin (novel)

a feast in time of plague (play)

ivan goncharov:

the precipice (novel)

oguri mushitarou:

the perfect crime (novel)

decay of the angel:

fukuchi ouchi:

the mirror lion, a spring diversion (kabuki play)

bram stoker:

dracula (novel)

dracula's guest and other weird stories (short story collection)

nikolai gogol:

the overcoat (short story)

dead souls (novel)

hunting dogs: (i must caveat here that the hunting dogs are named after much more comparatively obscure jpn writers/playwrights so i was unable to find a lot of the specific pieces actually mentioned; but i still wanted to include them on the list because well -- it wouldn't be a bsd list without them)

okura teruko:

gasp of the soul (short story; i wasn't able to find an english translation)

devil woman (short story)

jouno saigiku:

priceless tears (kabuki play; no translation but at least we have a summary)

suehiro tetchou:

setchuubai/a political novel: plum blossoms in snow (novel)

division for unusual powers:

taneda santouka:

the santoka: versions by scott watson (poetry collection)

tsujimura mizuki:

lonely castle in the mirror (novel)

yesterday's shadow tag (short story collection; i was unable to find a translation)

order of the clock tower:

agatha christie:

and then there were none (novel)

murder on the orient express (novel)

she is the best selling fiction writer of all time there's too much to list here

mimic:

andre gide:

strait is the gate (novel)

trascendents:

arthur rimbaud:

illuminations (poetry collection)

the drunken boat (poem)

a season in hell (prose poem)

johann von goethe:

faust

the sorrows of young werther

paul verlaine:

clair de lune (poem, yes it did inspire the debussy piece, yes)

poems under saturn (poetry collection)

victor hugo:

the hunchback of notre-dame (novel)

les miserables (novel)

william shakespeare:

romeo and juliet (play)

a midsummer nights' dream (play)

sonnets (poetry collection)

the seven traitors:

jules verne:

around the world in 80 days (novel)

journey to the center of the earth (novel)

twenty thousand leagues under the seas (novel)

other:

natsume souseki:

i am a cat (novel)

kokoro (novel)

botchan (novel)

h.g. wells:

the time machine (novella)

the invisible man (novel)

the war of the worlds (novel)

shibusawa tatsuhiko:

the travels of prince takaoka (novel; unable to find translation)

dr. mary wollstonecraft godwin shelley

frankenstein (novel)

[spin-linn]

A Small Snippet from a story I'm writing

Heroes United [Working Title]: a Rise of the Brave Tangled Dragons novel

Hiccup’s POV:

The trail we followed to Old Corona was littered with a few too many tree roots and chuck holes for my taste. It was like a war zone, and the battle was being waged against my lack of agility. I tripped and teetered over so many times I lost count. I would have smashed my face against a sunken boulder had it not been for Jack, who quickly yanked me upright by the shirt collar just as I began to topple over a huge crack in the obliterated cobblestone road.

“Jings, you're as wobbly as a newborn foal,” Merida chortled after watching my clumsiness take over for the umpteenth time.

I gave her an irritated glare. “Yeah, yeah,” I muttered, shrugging her delightful personality off. “I get it, I'm a klutz. Tell me a new one.”

“As you wish,” she took my sarcasm as a challenge. “You're also as stubborn as a buckin’ cuddy.”

“Whoa! Watch your mouth, Mer!” Jack cackled, taking her words to be off-color.

“She wasn't cursing,” I chuckled, realizing Jack wasn't as well-versed in Scottish lingo as I was. As much as the Vikings hated them, my dad and a lot of the other adults sure enjoyed borrowing a lot of their slang and vernacular. I grew up hearing it a lot, so one could say I was fluent. I knew what a cuddy was. “She just called me a horse,” I explained. “Like, a wild one that someone's trying to ride for the first time. That's why she said I was like a bucking cuddy.”

“Oh, okay,” he seemed to understand, “like a bucking bronco, then? I know rodeos.”

“What the heck's a bronco?” I gave him a confused glance. “Or a rodeo?”

“Seriously? It's another word for a horse.”

“Innae no horse I've ever heard of,” Merida scoffed.

“Jeez Louise! It's an unbroken horse!” Jack enunciated, holding back laughter. He seemed to be reaping as much fun out of the strange conversation as he could. “And a rodeo is like a big show where people do horseback tricks and try to ride broncos or bulls.”

“Show riding, huh?” That got my attention. “We do that with our dragons from time to time back on Berk! Toothless and I have gotten pretty good at air tricks.”

“I can hit a bullseye from 50 paces on horseback,” Merida interjected, bragging to herself. “Been practicing for months.”

“That's impressive, Mer, but I would say barrel racing and lassoing cattle isn't exactly like that,” Jack chuckled, shaking his head. “You've clearly never seen a cowboy movie.”

“Now we're talking about cows?” My confusion only grew. “What even is this conversation?” I threw my hands up in defeat, beginning to laugh in spite of myself. “Now I'm lost.”

“I guess you could also call him a ‘brumby’, Mer,” mused Jack, still preoccupied with the whole “cuddy” confusion. “Picked that one up from a friend 'down undah',” he said with a funny accent.

“I have absolutely no idea what's going on back there,” Rapunzel called back to us as she led the path, studying Cassandra's notebook. “But I am enjoying the chaos.”

“Join the club, Punz!” I started to laugh.

_______________

If you've stuck around this long, thanks for reading! The story this is from has been a passion project for almost 10 years. I'm writing it as a form of therapy, and I'm not planning to post the finished product anywhere as of now.

I've been working on this story for several months now, and I'm just really proud of this dialogue exchange. I wanted to share it, even though I don't intend to share the whole story. Thanks for bearing with me, and I hope you enjoyed it!