#i'm not tagging god of war or twilight i'm not gonna inflict 1d6 psychic damage on innocent victims | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nebulousfishgills · 16 days ago

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I wish Stephenie Meyer had the sense to make Caius originally from Sparta since that makes the most sense in my head (but no, god forbid she give any of the Volturi a time period in history that's well documented to allow for character building), even if it would make him chronologically the youngest of the three kings rather than the oldest. He just reads like a hot headed Spartan general to me, and it'd better explain his behaviors in the books.

That and I want to somewhat feasably be able to say I want to semi-seriously crack-ship him with Kratos. I wanna say that those two had something going on in the Spartan barracks with my full chest and just watch the world burn behind me.

These are the thoughts that can only possibly come from my own stupid brain. You only get premium brainrot content from me.

#although I don't think smeyer would have even considered it #because spartans respected women to an unheard of degree for the time #and you know the only example of physical abuse towards a woman in the books is caius slapping irina #which sends me into a rage whenever i remember it #like if you're gonna be blatantly obvious that you hate one character more than any other #at least have the guts to say it to my face because it's so obvious he's the punching bag for everyone else #and the sadism is mindless like girl be fr way to put so much effort into making the only sensible character the least likeable #you can pry spartan general caius who's a wife guy that respects women more than the other volturi out of my cold dead hands #maybe that's fundamentally altering the character but who cares #stephenie meyer sure as fuck does not #you know what now shipping caius and kratos is out of sheer spite #twink spartan general and his beefy spartan general fellow soldier slash intimate bunk mate #i'm not tagging god of war or twilight i'm not gonna inflict 1d6 psychic damage on innocent victims #if this is meant to break containment then the gods will provide it's not up to me #fishgills speaks

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