#i'm not rewarding that behaviour
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honestly? my life improved SO much when I started using "I'm not rewarding that behaviour" with adults instead of just small children and animals (especially adult men)
#rambles#honestly#this was a life changer#you don't have to reward bad behaviour#even if they are an ���adult”#and should therefore “know better”#we need to start calling adults out on their bs more#just cause they're grown doesn't mean they're right#the amount of people that this has upset#only for them to be unable to explain why#cause they know full well what they're doing is wrong or immoral or just plain rude#men who manspread especially#“how dare you try to take up more space than you need instead of making yourself smaller to accommodate me and my ego”#“hey bro why you mad?”#but he just sits there in furious silence#because he knows that he can't give out to me for doing something#that he did first#i'm not rewarding that behaviour#the same with rude people (service workers this one's for you)#you don't have to reward the behaviour of the person screaming at you over something you had no control over#you can just#move on with your life#without arguing back or giving them the satisfaction of a reaction#don't reward their behaviour by giving into the drama#they get very upset#but sometimes#they actually#stop#and think about what they're doing#i've had a grown ass man apologise to me for the manspreading issue before
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I'm gonna spoil an idea I have for a fic, because it may never actually be written.
This idea works from the theory that Skully is actually from the past and might even be a spirit (or ghost) himself that somehow was sucked into the book either when he was alive and 16, and the contents and world as well as time of the book are anamolous. Or that Skully had died years prior, his soul tied itself to the book, and his conciousness was "awakened" with new visitors being sucked into the book that his soul is presumably trapped in.
I re-watched Anohana recently and have recieved visions of Skully acting in the place of Menma. Skully himself is unaware of how much time as actually passed since his arrival in the world ov TNBC, and upon meeting the others assumes they're all from the same time, namely, his time. It would explain why he uses "wagahai" as a self-refferential pronoun (it is unused in modern day and is considered an archaic way of speaking), why he doesn't recognize Malleus' name or who he is, why he doesn't know of the magic stones that mages use now (since it's been said that magic stones weren't always around and had been introduced fairly late into Twisted Wonderland's history) and why his ideas of Halloween are very survival-based, and less leisurely like it is in modern times. Jack Skellington could very well have existed in Twisted Wonderland, but has been forgotten and lost to time. (Probably because his story and very existence deals with alternate worlds)
Anyway. Yuu and co. eventually realize that Skully is not from the same time that they are. This is where my direection for the fic gets a little wonky:
When completing the story of TNBC and the event is over, Skully still lingers. So now it's up to Yuu to grant his wish so he can go to the afterlife and reincarnate.
It is still during the event that Yuu tries to grant Skully's wish, hoping to placate him out of his plans in the process. So now Yuu, Grim, and Jack (essentially the kidnapped trio) attempt to get him to move on from his plans, celebrate Halloween, and get his soul to leave the book.
#twisted wonderland#twst#disney twisted wonderland#twst spoilers#twst skully#skully j graves#man my blog tags are hard to remember#I think this post fits under the category of?#A King's Contemplation#Phantom's Lapidary#AHAHAHA IF YOU'VE MADE IT THIS FAR IN THE TAGS YOU GET TO READ:#skully angst haha i'm making him sad and pathetic#Skully thinks his wish is to celebrate Halloween the “proper way” and share (force) it with others#See! His Halloween is the correct one! Jack agrees! Now come here and celebrate with him. Forever#but his ACTUAL wish is to have friends#Friends to celebrate Halloween with. Friends who will listen to him. Friends that don't ostracize him. Friends like Yuu and Grim#Sure. Celebrating Halloween with Jack would be a close second wish but I don't want to reward his obsessive behaviour#so friendless loser who craves acceptance but deceives himself with delusions of “proper” happiness and loses himself in the process it is
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I don't want a shiny-new series every other year if it means the currently running ones get axed. Just settle on longer-running storylines, already.
I can't wait for the Streaming Bubble to explode because this currently method is ruining a lot of things.
#star trek prodigy#star trek#I've come to the decision that I won't be getting Paramount ever again - I don't want to reward them for this behaviour#I'm sure the new shows will be fine but I don't plan on getting attached
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I haven't really been able to get anything meaningful done during my sick leave (which is pretty much the whole of last month) but! today I did! I worked on an essay for 30min and then also worked on an art piece for ~1h! And I could've gone for more but I need to go see a cardiologist early tomorrow so I'm trying to get to bed early!! I'm trying to take more care of myself and succeeding so I am celebrating that :3
#my brain is also being a hater and screaming at me that I've ruined things when I probably actually haven't#so this is also me redirecting my thoughts from that to the positives. cognitive behaviouring myself or smth#I'm going to go makemyself some starfast (evening equivalent of breakfast that english has no word for) and play some genshin as a reward#and then I'll hopefully sleep well and for multiple hours continuously! and then I'll have a nicer day tomorrow and life will be more yippe
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Julian inventing clicker training specifically for Avra
Avra would be more upset about it if he didn't get treats out of it
#Julian thinking to himself 'is this ethical? is it right to train him to do behaviours subconsciously using rewards?'#Avra to himself 'i'm gonna get a good grade in clicker training#a thing both normal to want and possible to achieve'#It's only ever gonna have limited success anyway it's Avra#avra helvaci#brother julian#running close to the wind
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Listen, I may be an effing idiot but I just wasted your time.
#A whole second of it#I'm so evil#You probably shouldn't reward this behaviour#random nonsense#random#dank memes#best memes#meme#lol memes#humor#Haha#I suck#i suck at tags#byeeeee#im screaming
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max domi - rangers @ leafs oct 19 2024
#toronto maple leafs#max domi#rick's gifs#i'm here for my girl and my girl only#cross checking tr**ba is behaviour that should be rewarded actually
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I combined two of my loves and did a thing 👉🏻👈🏻
So..
I knit, and embroidered, Kasper's 2018 WC jersey 👉🏻👈🏻
It ain't much, but it's honest work ✌🏻😗
#no i really don't know what got into me#i would like to also blame my best friend for being an enabler#i finished this just last week#which is good because i've been sick as hell#i'm kinda proud of it??? it was A LOT and I felt really desperate a lot of the time 🤣#adventures in crafting with Sunny#adventures in clinical behaviour with Sunny#where's my sauna pic as a reward Kaspy? 👉🏻👈🏻
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Hi this is a vent post! Continue scrolling if you'd rather not see that
#Giving time...#Still more time...#Wouldn't want to plague any previews#Maybe another filler. Just for some fun#Is this enough?#It certainly is now#Alright start:#I'm so bored. I am so incredibly; intrinsically; entirely bored. I have been taught the same thing for four years straight#'It's only four years!' that's literally a quarter of my lifetime right there. My formative years are being spent stressed and in a state /#/of constant self-loathing#I was watching a YT video and the phrase 'attention-starved STEM major' came up and I was like. Yea#What am I even working towards? The hope that my version of capitalist hell isn't as bad as everyone else's? I'm just so sick of not /#/having a stable future what with politics and normal working people becoming more and more oppressed#I don't want to work and that's not because I'm lazy. It's because my brain is recognising that there is no reward anymore#I used to have such a little spark in Yr7. I remember having things to say and wanting to share everything I've done#I still do that now; sure I do. I don't enjoy it though#I thought I liked drawing but I'm realising that all I really like is the attention. I COULD draw things I like drawing... but then I /#/ don't get attention which my mind then classifies as zero reward#I'm very tired of doing things for no credit; reward; or validation. This is becoming a theme#Then I wonder what I'm doing wrong. What part of the algorithm am I not hitting. Then I realise that I'm just not marketable in a way#God. I'm seriously breaking rn. It's not even only because of GCSEs#It's just a culmination of doing all these things to be told that I am unworthy of Having as a result. It doesn't matter if I'm smart; my /#/ parents still don't own their house and can't afford to pay for heating most days#Literally what am I doing this for#And then I realise that all of this is ALSO attention-seeking behaviour! I'm my own worst problem; I recognise exactly what's wrong with /#/ myself but the body wants what it wants. And what it wants is validation that I'm not going to get in this life#Hi guys! Maybe don't interact. That could fix me#Wean me off of needing virtual numbers just to feel something. Jesus#I can't even be happy with the things that I make for myself. Because I make nothing for myself anymore#It's just a whole sad existence of an expected 12hr+ of school every day until I get a job I guess. Then it's 12hr+ of job every day until
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if you join collaborative games and do fuck all just so you can get the reward with 0 effort whilst everyone else around you does everything for you, i wish you a very Go Fuck Yourself.
#goosey rambles#animal jam#<- this is about both pack runs and the forgotten desert#I'm so fucking pissed rn i should stop rewarding this behaviour i should've just left#anyways. fuck i need to calm down because I'm horribly pissed rn#btw yes i know neither were afk#the tfd guy left after it was done and the pack run guy who didn't move all pack run joined the new one#immediately after#fucking.#::[
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@mcg-127
wing preening is something that can be so intimate actually
#Maybe Dream wasn't meant to be the one preening my wings but he was the only family I had#I don't think I would've let other hybrids near my wings though- they could hurt me... But my big brother would never- unless I deserved it#Not to mention that preening was a reward for an exceptionally good behaviour...#If I stayed still and behaved it was nearly a pleasant bonding activity#eternal entanglement :)#hybrids au#(Tagging you because I'm Literally Your Tommy hehe)
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Omg Imagine fucking your sons teacher so he won’t fail his classes🫣
Best dad ever reward,,MINORS DNI!! Top male reader,, Dilfy reader woah,, Degradation,, over desk,,
Your son was a hassle,, you wouldn't say he was a disappointed nor was he a burden but getting calls from the principal of his school multiple times a term was not something you enjoyed!!
He would always come up with bullshit excuses that he was only messing or that he didn't mean to!! But you knew better,,he was your own son!! You could obviously tell when he was lying,,
Getting called in by his teacher to have a one on one meeting,,showing up in your best clothing to show your sons teacher that you weren't some deadbeat dad that was condoning this kind of behaviour!!
What you didn't expect was that his teacher was cute,, his soft brown hair and clothing that seemed more suitable to a librarian then anything!! No wonder your son calls him a nerd,,
"Sir! I'm so sorry to call you here today!" The teachers voice was soft as he apologised,,motioning you to take a seat infront of him as he sipped at his learning themed cup,,
He waited patiently for you to take a seat and once you did,,he seemed almost too grateful for it,, "I called you in for..this" His tone was apologetic as he handed you your sons report card,,which was almost all Fs the whole way around!!
The teacher wasn't ready for how you'd react,,most parents would scream and shout while others would frown and seem close to tears but you,, you didn't do anything of the sort!! >□<
He was bent over your desk,, his ass up as he gripped onto the paperwork!! Your cock moving in and out of him with provision!! It was like you knew exactly where to hit eachtime!!
"Fine! Fine, I'll change everything to an A! Please just, Let me cum please..!" His whines were pathetic as they reverberated around the room, his eyes trembling as he tried to not focus on the pleasure your dick gave him!!
Forcing him to change your sons card while you were still inside!! Watching his shaky hands type in the computer and spanking his ass for every misspelled word!! >□<
#{anon asks}#{h4rny ask}#top male reader#{top male reader}#sub male character#x bottom male character#bottom male character#x top male reader#dom male reader#x dom male reader
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How to actually train a submissive, a how to guide
+Thoughts on the pervasive misinformation surrounding punishments and their usefulness.
Step 1. Make sure your submissive actually want to be trained. I'm into dom breaking, I'm into kidnapping, I'm into all types of situations where you forcibly change a person into the perfect submissive. But that's all fantasy, and they're fun fantasies to play out with willing participants. (Yeah i know this is pretty obvious stuff, everyone should know this already, but it is an important first step and it cant hurt to repeat)
Step 2. Pick a goal. The perfect example is getting them to take their pills at the same time each day. Its something they already want to do, its something that will benefit them greatly, its something that's very obviously pass/ fail, and its simple. Those are the criteria for a good behaviour to modify (with "want to do" flipped to "don't want to do" if its a behaviour you're trying to stop). The fewer of those things are true the more difficult its going to be to get the desired result, not impossible mind you but more difficult. As you and your submissive gain experience and become more comfortable with this process you can begin to modify more complex behaviours, but keep it simple to start.
Step 3. DO reward success, DO NOT punish failure. I'm gonna let myself rant about this at the end of this guide but for the moment just believe me when i say punishments are not a useful tool in training. So reward them every time the succeed. The best rewards are small things that stimulate the pleasure centre of their brain. Praise is a great place to start, stickers, snacks, tiny animal erasers, maybe shiny treasures if they have corvid like proclivities. Whatever it is make sure you give it to them personally, make sure you show you're genuinely happy with them, and make sure its something they cant get or aren't allowed to have otherwise. If the do fail (and they will sometimes) don't reward them, don't punish them, and don't let them punish themself. They want to be good for you, they will take failure hard. You need to make sure they know failure isn't a bad thing, everyone fails sometimes especially when starting to learn something. You need to reassure them that you're not angry or sad or upset and especially not disappointed.
Step 4. Be consistent. Reward them every time until they have a perfect record for a significant period of time. The specifics of this depend too much on the specifics of the behaviour and the reward so i wont try to give guidelines. Once they have that perfect track record start reducing the frequency of the rewards, stress to them that this isn't a punishment this is a really good thing. It means the training is working and they should be proud of themself and you are proud of them. Once you've weaned them off of the reward all together give them a big reward as a congratulations. And then sporadically reward them as a reminder that you're proud of them and to keep the habit strong. If the behaviour begins to drift you might need to go back and start rewarding them again, this shouldn't be seen as failure, its a normal part of training.
Step 5. Start again. Do they still want to be trained or are they happy with where they are? Is there another behaviour you want to modify? Is it time to try a more difficult modification? Do you need to switch up the reward to keep them motivated? Do you have the bandwidth to be consistent?
A note on brats. Specifically type 3 brats as described in THIS post. None of my advice changes. They still want to be good for you they just also want to play a fun game with you. Enjoy the fun game and train them to improve their lives. Just, don't try to train them out of being a brat, they're enjoying their game don't take away something that they enjoy, if you don't want a brat don't get with a brat.
Finally here is the as promised rant about punishment.
To the submissive reading this. You don't deserve to be punished, you never deserved to be punished. Even if you were a "problem" child you didn't deserve to be hurt for it. You still don't deserve to be hurt in ways you don't want to be. To the dominant reading this, yes you can rule through fear it is possible, but gods why?! If your ultimate goal isn't for your sub to be as happy and self fulfilled as possible, whatever that looks like for them, then what the fuck are you doing. And aside from that punishment isn't even an effective method of training. A dog kicked whenever it barks will learn to fear you and wont bark around you. A child spanked whenever you feel they've done something wrong will learn to resent you and will hide everything from you. An adult punished for stealing will learn to steal more effectively. Your submissive is no different from any of those examples. Kill the cop in your head, stop thinking of punishment as a legitimate means of control.
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I Have Become a Crow Friend.
It started because I commute to work on an e-scooter, and a couple of crows had started to fly along side me. I mean close, maybe two feet from from my face. I know this isn't unusual behaviour for a crow, but for me it's magical. I am flying with crows! I presume they're gliding in my wake and it's fun for them, because they started to do it every morning. I wanted them to know that I admire them and want good things for them, so I started to travel with a bag of unsalted, unshelled peanuts. When I got to the end of the road where they glide with me, I stop and leave some peanuts on the grass for them, and then I continue on my journey.
Well, they certainly know who I am now, and so does their extended family. They get my attention in a number of ways. Sometimes they will fly directly in front of my scooter, and I fear I'm going to hit them, but I don't, because they know what they're doing. They will fly in my eye line and land in a place where I can't miss them. There is one set of cousins down the road who thought shouting at me and waiting for me to come out of a building would be a good idea, but I did not reward that, and it hasn't happened since. They don't normally shout at me, they just flirt with me by flying with me, being beautiful in my presence, and giving me the eye. Then I give them treats.
One day I couldn't ride my e-scooter because of the weather so I walked my route. I traded my usual blue coat for a warmer red one with the hood up, and no orange helmet. I figured my crow friends would ignore me, since I am no longer a wheeled creature with blue feathers and an orange head. But no: they know who I am. They know the scooter is a vehicle that I ride, they know the coat and the helmet are things I'm wearing. My crow friends recognize my face. I know this totally normal behaviour for crows, but I am honoured by it nonetheless.
I always talk them. I greet them. I warn them about weather that's coming. I ask them how they're doing. My ultimate goal is to have them talk back to me, which I know they are fully capable of doing. And one day maybe the crows in this area will spot people walking alone in the woods and will shout out, "Hello, friend!" and freak them the fuck out. That's the kind of legacy I'm after. My quest continues.
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I created fanfics and fanart, and now I create original works. And comments hit so much harder on original work, but also 90% of the time they're just people's opinion on characters, the plot, their inner thoughts etc. but they're not doing it to talk with the author. They're doing it to talk with other readers. (In fandom it's directed kind of at both since we're all part of a group and even in our standing.)
And I think this might be another reason why AO3 comments are dropping. Because the readers aren't talking among themselves anymore (there's a sense of "don't talk to me unless I know you" on the internet in general now. Including Tumblr which I find devastating.). Plus, unlike Webtoon, Youtube, Insta etc. you can't leave a like on a comment on AO3 to show you're agreeing with someone, so people get 0 feedback on their plot theories and end up just not commenting. They probably still think about it they just don't bother sharing those thoughts in the open when no one's there to hear them out.
Is it just me, or are there less comments being written on fics nowadays? I get to a fic on AO3 that was posted weeks ago, and it has like 30 kudos but no comments yet. It happens more and more now. Why is that?
I don't like it.
#also Twitter is a cesspool that rewards bad behaviour so I'm not surprised authors are blasting commenters#when that gets more engagement than posting nice stuff
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So many TTRPG people, like yourself, seem to exist in a world where players don't actually enjoy the campaigns they're in, and don't actually like playing with the people they play with, and your whole approach to game mechanics seems like it's about trying to bribe these people to continue playing at a given table.
i have no idea where you get this idea from, I play a bunch of different games - including freeform text rp, fest larps, parlour larps, regular tabletop campaigns, longform play-by-post games and narrative wargames - and I have a lot of fun doing it. I wouldn't be a game designer if I didn't actually enjoy games. The thing is, if you study game design and ttrpg theory seriously, you think about the intent behind design decisions. Game design doesn't just happen by accident, the designer put a given rule in for a reason. So, you ask yourself why the designer made the game the way it did, and what they were trying to achieve.
A significant tool for game design is considering the feedback the game provides; what behaviours that ruleset rewards and what it discourages. (You can apply this analysis to other games, too, like video games). When I'm talking about a bribe, it's in that context; how does the game reward you for doing things, and what things does it reward. (For example, 'scrabble' rewards you for playing words with weird letters in them by making those letters worth more points.)
The thing is, ultimately, every game relies on a simple proposition; that if you volunterily use its rules, you will have fun. You don't need to follow the rules, and you can have fun without them, but the idea is that using the rules will let you have more fun, or a different type of fun, than if you didn't. (For example, throwing a ball around is a bit fun, but if everybody agrees to follow the rules of basketball, you get a different experience that a lot of people prefer). So, the only bribe you're making on the interpersonal, out-out-of-game level (unless something weird is going on) is "if we play this game it will be fun". When I talk about bribes and incentives, it's *inside* the game, after we've all agreed to the game's proposition of "if you use the rules, you will have fun".
Now, what counts as an incentive varies by game. Some, like Warhammer 40k, are challenge-based, and have ways to keep score of success and victory; here, things that signify overcoming the challenge are your incentives; how you get a high score, how you win, etc. Others, like most ttrpgs, are creative-based. What constitutes an incentive within the game's structure is less precisely defined. By and large, though, these incentives tend to be things like increased agency within the game fiction, space for creative expression, and experiencing and learning about more of the game fiction. (In this structure, 'being more mechanically powerful' can be thought of as a way of granting a player more agency, because their actions are more likely to succeed and result in the outcomes that they want. If the mechanical growth is lateral as well as vertical, then how to get more powerful is - itself - a venue for creative expression in what to prioritise, which is also a reward).
In the same way that you have the adage that 'restrictions breed creativity', the same goes for Fun. Limiting your scope from anything-goes freeform by voluntarily agreeing to use a set of game rules can produce similar results. Voluntarily limiting your agency in the fiction according to a set of game rules produces a friction that players of roleplaying games find enjoyable to push against. In this context, a reward structure within a game serves the useful purpose of signposting which direction you should push to get the fun kind of friction. A game which limits your options, and then gives you more options when you engage with certain behaviours, is telling you that those are the intended behaviours. Likewise, a game that limits your options even further when you do something is encouraging you not to do that. This is because game designs are not neutral and universal, they exist to create specific experiences. A game that rewards you by giving you more space for creative expression when you get in a fight - and gives you less space for creative expression when you avoid violence - is one that wants you to engage in violence, because it's designed to be a game where you have fun by fighting. This isn't bribing the players to sit down at the table and play the game; that has already happened outside the context of the game. They have already agreed to the game's offer of 'if you use these rules, you will have fun'. Rather, this bribing is within the game-space, the games mechanics encouraging the players to engage with it as intended, in the way that will be most fun. IE: these incentive structures are a tool the game uses to achieve the promise it makes; they guide the players towards the fun that they volunteered to have. Hope that makes sense. * * * Now, your initial ask is a weird take that's entirely unrelated to anything I've posted, and - particularly from an anon account- oddly antagonistic. I don't know if you're genuinely confused about game design, or arguing in bad faith. Either way, this probably doesn't merit the small essay I've produced, but have one anyway, it's always fun to clarify my ideas in written form.
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