#i'm not gonna believe it until i get the confirm email

[redhead-reporter]

well that was the HUNGER GAMES and the website is broken af. but i think your girl managed to score the collectors edition of spider-man 2 🥰

[comradeocean]

One Day 2024 Emma Morley headcanon I figured out from a throwaway line in a fic I'm working on but I'm not gonna include bc it's already too long and weird but I just need to put this out there in the world:

after Tilly's wedding they resume their friendship w extreme gusto - emails, many phone calls, back and forth SMSs all day (Dex is hugely relieved he's on a separate contract from Sylvie but chooses not to think about this too much)

Clearly full blown emotional affair level, and with Sylvie switched on to wedding planning mode and buried in logistics and catering and whatever, it's easy for Dex to coast, being supportive and going along with whatever The Fiancée wants while thinking about how he'd word the funny email to Em about this ridiculous wedding activity later that night etc

So it's not hard for Dex and Em to pretend everything is just like it was and revert to their early stage London friendship (where according to the book version they were completely obsessed w each other). Until the wedding. And the honeymoon.

When Dexter goes cold turkey no contact for the entire 3 weeks bc he realized at some point (maybe at the reception when he wanted to immediately go dance w Em? Or Sylvie has like a dress crisis 15 minutes before walking down the aisle and he's not really panicking but preoccupied over some ambivalent email Emma's agent sent her about a possible TV adaptation of her book and whether he should try to hook her up with some contact he has) that this was really fucked up! and he was being an awful shitty person to Sylvie! who he loves! and has gotten married and is having a kid with!!

Em, of course, has also been in full denial about this - he's just my best friend (Tilly: so what am I? chopped liver??), we're just catching up after not being in touch for so long. And she's able to lie to herself about this until he suddenly goes completely off grid during the honeymoon and she has a mini breakdown and realizes:

- she's fallen back in love w him - he's just being regular old charming rooting-for-her-all-the-way #1 cheerleader Dexter - she craves validation, he clearly still has bad impulse control so it's headed straight for a Headmaster Phil sordid affair situation - and she cannot have their friendship degenerate into that

so she has some crisis meetings with Tilly and decides to dial it the fuck back. only casual drop-in hangouts in public with other ppl around. phone calls preferably same. no texting. emails get a pass bc it's like work (it's OK she can still be in denial a little bit, as a treat)

and miracle of miracles! by some unspoken agreement he's also dialing it the fuck back. (Em bitterly tells herself it was the mind blowing honeymoon sex.) (intuition bitterly confirmed by Dex now regularly bringing Sylvie along to their dinner/lunch/coffee dates)

Emma is trying very hard to be a supportive innocuous 100% platonic not secretly pining best friend but it's fucking hard and she ends up cancelling a bunch of things at the last minute bc of migraines or swollen glands or whatever mysterious illness she makes up, because seeing them being lovey-dovey is so fucking painful she's literally constantly on the verge of tears. Eventually, faking it till she makes it works and she's able to ignore it better and it's on a way lower shimmer and everything is mostly fine again.

all this to say! Emma was on super high guard in Paris refusing to believe Dexter had any deeper feelings specifically for her, Emma, as a person, besides someone who is always there for him and low effort etc. So his sudden refusal to have dinner w her and Jean-Pierre is very confusing. She's trying to figure it out - Dex is extroverted, loves meeting ppl and bantering and showing her up, a little too much even, like a competition to prove who's more charismatic. And the swollen glands thing is clearly fake. So what is up?????

She's distracted, picking over it on the walk to the restaurant w Jean-Pierre until she suddenly considers the possibility he is pulling the same trick she did - he is so heartbroken seeing her w someone else it is causing sufficient anguish he can't even fake being friendly and social. Dexter! Mr TV Presenter social butterfly Dexter Mayhew! And so the penny droppeth 😋

[coffee-in-veins]

Hey there,

Sorry to hear about the entire shitfest with the DD contest and I think you argued your case well. It adds insult to injury that you showed your picture beforehand but the disqualification came right at the end of the deadline.

It's also double standards that Dismas' manspread bulge in the CC is fine, so is Amani and Audrey's backstory but someone has a seriously troubling view on what counts as erotica and they kick you out for it.

I saw this picture and thought "this looks familiar" but I couldn't really place why until you showed the For Honor reference (shame on me, I played that game like an addict for a while, even made a Reynauld character) and that is a pretty cool kill move. And you did the reference justice.

I hope that in time you will be able to look at the piece and not think of it as a waste of time. Sometimes it's hard to love a product when the people behind it disappoint us so much.

I for one would like to thank you for sharing your wonderful art with us and wish you all the best!

hello hello o/

thank you for reaching out to me. i really appreciate that. those two days were a mess and a half, not gonna lie. and i'm really happy to hear that you like the picture! the support shown for it definitelly dulled some of the "this is such a waste of my effort, love and care" feel, thank you and everyone else for it

the real salt to injury was that disqualification came *after* the showcase was posted. it's been an hour since all participants were shown in a new channel, and i started to get nervous and had to ask around who should i even talk to to get any info on what happened with my work. i thought that maybe i messed up and sent confirmation to rules from one email and the work itself from another... so the "too violent" (as i understood at the time) disqualification was like a kick to the throat.

when i started posting about the fact that i was disqualified for "violence" and people started wondering, then the mods came into picture. and the first one who contacted me even was on my side, seeing this as some mistake as well. so i had my false hopes.

i didn't include those snapshots because they were basically a couple of words with a promise to look into things. it was Lux, if anyone is wondering.

then the gem who wasted a few hours of my life appeared, trying to gaslight me into believing that incel interpretation of an execution pose is somehow my fault... you know the rest. by that point i wasn't meek or baffled. i was pissed.

now i'm mostly numb. double standards are the way to go, i suppose. when the guy argued that depiction of canonical events is bannable in the Hellsing he brought out of nowhere, i knew it was a lost cause.

heh, glad to hear you faintly recognized the pose and think i did it justice! that's always reassuring to hear. a small part of me wonders if it would've helped if i sent those pictures and video alongside the progress pictures we were required to send. most likely no. maybe i'm just trying to see if there was anything i could do to make things work... a faulty way of thinking, i suppose. the burden of evidence for accusation is on the accusing side, after all, and there was no evidence provided. and again, most of me just hopes for feeling closure in a day or six.

thank you again for your kind words and reassurance! it means a lot to me <3

p.s. also i know what my author's notes for each and every RRR chapter will be from now on ;}

[fizzingwizard]

Well I'm back... I took an unexpected four day Internet break because my router broke down. At least that's what I think happened.

At first I thought I'd used too much wifi (I had a cheap-o plan that always got throttled after watching like one long video on Youtube lol), but the speed was way, waaaaaay slower than any limit I've been hit with in the past. I couldn't load any website without hitting refresh about a hundred times and then it would load in pieces, and if it had video or images (like youtube or tumblr) it was 100% a no go. Couldn't even log into email. If I finally reached the login page, the signal would be lost while sending through my credentials, and then it'd be an hour before the page would load for me to try again... Absolutely nightmarish

Anyway, it couldn't have been the throttling. Then I thought maybe it was some kind of maintenance in my area?? Because I'm never had a problem here before in six years. Or someone who moved in was a real wifi hog...? But even that seemed impossible. Again, never experienced anything like it...

But it just seemed so weird that it could be hardware issue! Because I took my router (which was a portable kind) to work with me twice, and it worked just fine out that way. Only in my apartment it refused to move faster than a snail. I really thought it had to be a signal issue.

Conveniently, I also don't have a working phone right now. I was planning to use the internet to buy a new one on an installment plan... and then lost internet bahahah. So I couldn't call my ISP about the problem either.

So today, day five of no internet, I took the router to a store that sells the same plan, and they had no idea either (even after calling the ISP themselves), but thought it must be the hardware. And although I was a little skeptical, they did confirm that the signal should be fine in my area, and they also told me about new plans that cost the same as my old one but are waaay better. No throttling!!! Of course I was sold on that haha. I love the idea of actually being able to use the internet in the evenings during "peak" hours (still can't quite believe it... this is my first week to test it so fingers crossed!). So even if they'd been able to fix my old router, I guess I'd have bought this new one anyway.

It took three hours to get it though. Partly because I'm a foreigner and the order of my name and my middle name scared them haha. But they were super nice and helpful to me the whole time and took care of everything. I came home, plugged everything in, and voila, perfect internet. I got a non-portable unit this time because it's got a lot more power. I had the portable one originally because my job involved a lot of traveling, but I left that job years ago and just kept the portable router because it still worked, and my habit is to keep things until they literally fall apart on me xP I'm very much hoping to be amazed by what the non-portable one can do...

Dunno how I'm gonna make it through the backlog on my dash but I'm so happy to be online again~

[darlingpwease]

I really didn't mean for it to be longer, that's my bad (╥﹏╥)

..then isn't that some 'you' time??? How I spend some me time is I read, play games, write, or just chill in my bed. What's ur 'me' time if it's considered work then?? 🤨 /neu wait really???

(The good thing is we have peer reviews later. The problem is that this dude is the teachers favorite so idk how that'll go. Me and like 2 other members are gonna try and send an email to our professor and hope that she'll take pity on us lol. I think that due to how blatantly obvious the favoritism is,, they agreed because of it?? Idfk. I think we just all suck at communication in this group.... thank u for ur works tho Dove <333 ur too sweet, I think I feel my cavities acting up again /t /j /pos /affectionate imgonnagocrashnow)

Blegh- it's already slowly in motion... /hj

NOOOO IM SORRY!! I remember quite a bit of things, even some things from when we first started talking,, but I truly don't remember this one I'm sorry!! ( ´༎ຶ□༎ຶ`) ...just... just let me die from afar and leave me there after <//333

Of course those are lovely too. I just have a preference to certain animals and certain tones. All colors are cool tho when they're all a good mix,, those are always really cool to see in artworks <33 oh please, as if I had anyone else. Even if I was tho I wouldn't even put it in an ask lmao /t /hj

WH- I'm so glad I don't meet you face to face, because I know damn well that it'd be a struggle if I were to hear u say that <//333 /pos? /neu?? /idk??? /not good, not bad, but it's not neutral /it's like a weird thingy /not negatively tho /idk how to explain it??? /going into hiding tho <33 ah?

-panna cotta

oh nooo sweet panna cotta wrote me more what a horror suddenly I have to answer more to their words??? noooo I don't like to read what he writes and think how cute he is noooo ://// shush silly :////// I want to bite you sometimes, not just because you're cute, but also so that you stop being so anxious ://///////

of course not. if my brain is working, how can this be resting time?🤨 or what, do you want to say that you are resting while analyzing what happened during the day or your emotions during "you" time??? during "my" time, my brain generates cute things and ideas while I cuddle with my toy, imitating a dream; the rest of the time I work🤨🤨 absolutely. it was also in yesterday's post, where are the ideas (if you haven't forgotten it yet /t /hj); you've just suddenly become a bit too,,,, smooth. it's disturbing, but rather in a good sense i think.

(mmm, that's what they call a "justified advantage," right? hehehe; I don't think others will appreciate it, but then it will surely be very smooth for you — as long as you have at least some foundation, then everything will pass. just try to hold on well and confidently with your pretty quiet nature, don't throw yourself into a tremor and don't make that bunny face, and everything will be great♡ oh, that's bad!!! what if it's caries? you have to take care of your teeth, especially when it's baby teeth!!! try not to be such a sweet thing and eat healthy food<333 /t /hj)

mhm mhm... 🫤 for some reason, I can't believe that a person who confirmed that he plans to stay up at night suddenly says that he has started taking care of himself. do you know why?🫤🫤🫤 /t /hj

... ha. not until you give your consent<3 also, I promised that I would take care of my cute worm<33 so... no❤︎

you're so peaceably flexible with this "yes, but", "of course it is", "I don't argue, but", that I don't even know if I want to tease you or just put you in a box, because I'm sure some law prohibits being so timidly relaxed,,,, I mean, you've said before that you're like that, but I really didn't expect you to be even more like that than it was even said</3333 /ht /hj /neu<3 oh, so there was another belly, right??? I get it, I get it. no more mwahes for you — I'm not kissing cocottas who already have someone!!! 3:<<< puf puf puf 3:<<<<< /t /hj

don't worry, honey, if we were face to face, I wouldn't say that to you — I would bite your lovely cheek right away<33333 hehehe~ AHAHAHHA noooooo cute cutie</33333 maybe you mean "shyly"? "uncomfortable"? "don't do what again"? /ht I mean, where else can you be besides my pocket and my box? very suspicious, I think I'm going to erase the inscription with a pencil, you're reacting very strangely🤨🫤 /t /hj

[angelbaby-fics]

hi chloe!! been a while since i stopped by your asks. if this is possible, may i please request a birthday themed fic? you can decide all you want it can be angsty or fluffy!! I requested this since my birthday is gonna be on monday!! thank u and have a great day <3 💕💕💙

Birthday Cake

bWord Count: 900

Pairing: Daddy!Stucky x Little!Reader

A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONIQUE!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🥳💕🎁🎉🎈 i'm sorry this is a little late but I hope you like it & I hope you had a really amazing birthday!!! 💕

Steve woke up the morning of your birthday, rubbing his eyes sleepily as he turned to look at you, still fast asleep and curled into his side. He always woke up before you and Bucky, loving to get an early breakfast and a run before he started his day. On this special day, however, his run would have to be cut a little short as he still had a few birthday themed errands to run before you woke up.

You stirred slightly as Steve peeled your arm away from his torso, murmuring in your sleep at the loss of his warmth. He paused for a moment, holding his breath until you turned yourself around and repositioned yourself as Bucky’s little spoon. Steve made sure you were tucked back into the comforter before he quietly grabbed some clothes from the closet and stepped out of the room.

He ran until the sun was just barely peeking over the horizon. Knowing you and Bucky would still be asleep for likely a few more hours, Steve came home to take a quick shower before heading out again. He drove downtown to the bakery where he’d placed an order for your custom birthday cake a couple weeks, or so he’d thought. You see, Steve still hadn’t quite gotten the hang of technology, and while he thought he’d placed the order successfully, he’d actually closed the window before the order went through. He didn’t realize this, however, until he walked into the bakery as soon as they opened and asked if they had an order for “Rogers, Steve”.

“I’m sorry sir, we don’t have anything under that name. Is it possible you used a different name?” The employee behind the counter asked. “Uhh maybe Barnes, James? Or Stark, Tony?” Steve replied, wondering if maybe he’d gotten his credit cards confused. “I’m sorry, we don’t have any of those names here, either. Do you have the confirmation email we sent you when you placed the order?” Steve sighed and scratched his head.

“Let me see…” He said, slightly exasperated as he opened his email app and scrolled through hundreds of unread messages to the day he placed the order and beyond, not finding any sort of email from the bakery. “It’s not here.” He replied, finally.

“Okay, then that means that the order didn’t go through so we do not have your cake ready, however your card has not been charged for anything.” “What do I do then?” Steve asked. “Well you could place the order now, but it won’t be ready for at least a week.” Steve sighed. He couldn’t believe his mistake. You hadn’t even woken up yet and already your birthday was ruined! He knew how excited you were fr cake, you always had such a sweet tooth and he was so looking forward to spoiling you with the perfect cake for your special day.

“Is there anything you can do in two hours?” He pleaded with the employee.

“Well, we have some pre-made cakes, they just won’t be decorated yet. But I can send you home with some decorating supplies if you’d like to do it yourself?” The employee replied, genuinely feeling bad for Steve, who contemplated for a moment before deciding that between this, a cake he made himself at home, or no cake at all, this was clearly the best choice.

“Thank you SO so much!” Steve answered, making sure to tip extra as the employee handed him a blank cake in your favorite flavor, and a bag of decorating supplies.

When he got home, he opened the cake box staring at the blank cake for what felt like a century before his attention was drawn to Bucky, who’d quietly and carefully gotten out of your grip as well and decided to help Steve set everything up before you woke up. He’d only been awake for a minute but he could already tell by Steve’s expression that something was wrong.

“What did you do?” Bucky asked with a smirk.

“You know that incredible custom cake I ordered? Well turns out I didn’t.” Bucky laughed, but Steve wasn’t smiling.

“It's not funny! Her birthday is ruined!” “No it isn’t, honey.” Bucky reassured him. “You tried your best and that’s what matters.” “But she won’t have a cake!”

“Sure she will, we’ll just have to decorate it ourselves. And if that’s not enough, we’ll just take her out for ice cream sundaes.”

“When are we goin???” You asked from the kitchen doorway, surprising them both.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HONEY!” Bucky cheered, while Steve stood there looking worried. “Hey bug,” He started as you crept over to him & climbed up into his arms. “I’m so sorry, but we didn’t get –” “YOU GOT A CAKE WE CAN DECORATE TOGETHER!!!” You squealed excitedly. “Can we put kitties on it?” “You- yeah, of course!” Steve stuttered for a moment before realizing that he’d really had nothing to worry about, there was no way he could ruin your birthday as long as he was in your life.

“And then after we eat cake for breakfast we can go get ice cream sundaes, right Baba?” You asked, turning to Bucky with a mischievous grin.

“Well now, I don’t know if I said that-” He started, but Steve cut him off.

“Of course baby. We can do whatever you want, it's your birthday!” He said, and the two of them smothered you with kisses as you dissolved into laughter.

Taglist: @babybatdani @cherryynoir @chiyongberry @simpingbutch @xxxqueenlaufeysonxxxxo @mogaruke @flthyhrts @swfpugh @mariefischer @stuckysgirl27 @stevebuckyplzfuckme @leialittleone @midnight-dreams-23 @mischiefsemimanaged @0witchtrials0 @my-river-lilly @erynnnn @axhilles4time 💕💕💕

[jijimoons]

demon brothers caring for a sick!mc

i am unfortunately not well right now so this is a bit of a coping mechanism 😎

(i don't write for belphegor as i'm only on lesson 15 so i don't have much of an idea of his personality yet)

characters: lucifer, mammon, leviathan, satan, asmodeus, beelzebub

format: headcanons

warnings: mentions of germs & illness, talk of food in beel's one

LUCIFER

we already know this man is far too busy

but does that mean he won't have time to take care of you?

oh hell no. he will MAKE time.

gonna be honest he's a bit emotionally stunted so i feel like he wouldn't be great at comforting you

but he will make you food and drinks, he will fetch you medication and painkillers

he's the one that emails the school to ask for your week off

he is the type of person to carry you out of bed and help you wash your hair & clean your teeth

forget his pledge of allegiance to diavolo, right now his human isn't well and they take priority

MAMMON

he will overreact like it's nobody's business

literally doesn't know a thing about human biology or illnesses and assumes the worst

"MY HUMAN IS DYING" "mammon sweetie it's just a cold" "I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU"

gets the finest human doctor in the devildom to have a look at you

idk if devildom healthcare is free but if not, he will not care how much grimm it costs

after the doctor has confirmed that you are fine he will act like a doting mother around you

he just wants you to be okay and feel comfortable :(

LEVIATHAN

he is a massive germophobe and you cannot change my mind

he is physically too scared to go into your room and feels so bad about it

hourly text updates asking if you need anything

he normally hates video calling but is happy to, just to see your face <3

if you ask him to get anything for you it arrives at your door in under 10 minutes (thank you akuzon prime delivery)

if you're a gamer then he will happily play your fave co-op games with you on voice if you feel up to it

he will not let you play for more than a couple hours at a time though!

"mc it's time to take a break" "but levi-" "no! go to bed"

SATAN

worrying mother pt.2 except he is a bit more chill about it

will research your symptoms for hours despite you telling him that you're fine

he is going to be around you at all times

whether he is in your room or you are in his, you are never getting rid of him

will 100% watch dramas with you to take your mind off it

if you feel particularly bad he will cuddle w you and read to you until you fall asleep satan marry me challenge

ASMODEUS

doesn't particularly like the idea of catching your disease , however has to be touching you at all times

seriously, it is not enough to stop him from clinging on to you 24/7-

he knows how icky you feel so you two have a lot of self care nights

facemasks, manicures, movies, the whole shebang

will encourage you to get a bit of fresh air now and then as it's not good for your mental health or your skinto stay cooped up in your room

(although he knows when not to push it, if you're sick you're sick)

BEELZEBUB

do i even need to say it?

the man is an avid believer that food cures everything

he'll look at special herbal dishes that help relieve symptoms and stuff, if your sinuses are blocked he will give you spices, that sorta thing

he enlists the help of luke and tells him to make your favourite sweet treats

(i'm sure that luke is more than happy to oblige)

when it comes down to it he is a very comforting presence, and just having him next to you is enough to make you feel a little better :')

he also gives great hugs??? this is a universally agreed fact

so yeah, that's it! i hope this helped anyone else having a hard time with various ailments. if you liked it then likes & reblogs are much appreciated!

- jay<3

[airasora]

Ikea can suck a donkey dick.

Pardon the crude first sentence, but I am so unbelievably furious. I'm currently on hold, waiting till someone from ikea answers so I can make an official complaint - or at the very least vent my frustrations to the poor soul who answers my call.

Two months ago, my ikea bed broke. It was old, we were suddenly three people on the bed and it just couldn't hold any longer. Fine, new bed it is, but good lord was I unprepared for the string of bullshit I was about to walk into.

1st bullshit = The ENTIRE assembly team was on vacation at the same time. So I had to wait until August to have my bed delivered and assembled because ikea is the only affordable funirtute company in my country. Fine, I'll sleep on the floor, I'm not the princess from the princess and the pea. So I order delivery 8th of August and assembly 11th of August.

2nd bullshit = I get a new apartment, yay, so I decide to postpone the delivery and assembly of the bed to mid-September. So I call them, ask them to cancel the former dates and push it to delivery September 19th and assembly September 22nd. They can't postpone it more than two weeks so I'm told they'll cancel my first order and simply make a new one. Ok, fine.

3rd bullshit, and this is where it gets really fun = I can see in my bank account that Ikea is planning on pulling money from my account TWICE for the bed. So I call them, ask them what the hell that is about. Firstly the dude I'm talking to says he can't see that I'm about to get charged twice. After some back and forth, he finally sees it and fixes it. Problem solved, right? Nope.

4th bullshit = Monday afternoon, the day I was supposed to have my bed delivered the first time, two ikea men show up at my front door and try to deliver my bed. Confused, I tell them that this order was canceled and pushed to September to a different address, my new address. They have to call their boss and confirm that it WASN'T canceled and it was the only order in my name. They drive off with the bed and I call ikea to discuss what the fuck is going on.

Turns out that the idiot I talked to didn't cancel my first order. No no no they canceled the NEW order. The order I had JUST MADE WITH THEM. So I talk on the phone with them, we cancel EVERYTHING in my name to get a clean slate and we make a new order and new assembly. Same new dates; delivery September 19th and assembly September 22nd. Now, surely it's all cleared, right?

NO.

5th bullshit = I get an email from the assembly department of ikea where they ask if they can assemble my bed tomorrow INSTEAD of this Thursday, again referring to the OLD ORDER. I officially lose my mind and write a really angry reply.

And now I'm on hold to talk to ikea and, frankly, tear them a new one. I can't BELIEVE how much they've managed to fuck up. How is this even possible? How can one of the biggest home depot companies IN THE WORLD be this utterly useless? Have I just been unfortunate and only gotten to talk to all their new employees who don't know what they're doing???

I'm just in shock. I've been on hold for 20 minutes, and I'm not gonna hang up or say yes to that "we'll call you back if you--" no. I'm not hanging up. How the hell does this happen? How is it possible for a company to consistently fuck up THE SAME ORDER over and over again???

Fuck you, ikea. I've been angry crying for the last 30 minutes.

[sayosdreams]

Étude des senses: an incomplete collection of sketches & paintings

Word Count: 984

ACOTAR Masterlist

__________

A/N: A short piece for you guys :) Surprise!

Today was my last official day of class for high school (I still have optional English and chem classes a couple times a week but it's not real class and not everyone will be there). I'm happy and sad and just nostalgic at the same time? 2021 has gone by so fast. I can't believe I'm basically done with high school! I decided to post this to celebrate. It's a piece I wrote a few days ago while trying to cure my writers block. (Yes I have like a million fics that I should be working on, I'm sorry, I'm sorry). It was gonna be a one shot but @perseusannabeth wants it to have a second part. I'm actually thinking of maybe something different but I'm terrible at following up on multi-part fics so we'll see... I'm so sorry this author's note got so long! Without further ado, enjoy!

Her brown hair shimmers like gold when the sunlight hits it and her blue-grey eyes glow.

He sketches her sometimes as he sips his coffee, watching her walk around the store.

Her hands absently caress the spines of the books on the shelves, her touch gentle and tender as a new lover’s. When a new song starts to play through the speakers, she starts to sway gently to the rhythm, never stopping her work.

He’ll never forget her, he thinks. His muse.

__________

He can’t call it love, not when he doesn’t even know her name.

Fascination, curiosity, or intrigue, maybe. Inspiration, beauty, and mystery, wrapped up in one, her long nimble fingers fly across her keyboard. Her brows are pulled together in focus, her eyes intent, mouth set in a hard line as she types away.

Cassian sketches it. His pencil could never quite do justice to the air of intensity and passion that surrounds her, contrasting sharply against the quiet stillness of the shop around them. But it’s better than a photograph. The room is dark and dusty but she is so alive, hunched over her laptop. He doesn’t know what she is writing — an email, a novel, or an essay? For his part, he doesn’t write anything down. He can’t think of an adequate title for the sketch.

__________

Her voice sounds like water. A soft stream or a violent hurricane depending on her mood, but water nonetheless and he laments that he can't capture it on paper. No amount of watercolor sketches of her as a naiad can depict the way her voice flows, how its current sweeps him off his feet, or how it seeps into the cracks of his soul. Perhaps it is fitting that he can’t recreate it on paper — it slips through his fingers like water, always yearning to be free.

Her voice is a whirlpool, drawing him in, closer and closer, until he realizes that he can’t escape. He is addicted to her, the freshwater in his desert, and he can’t even picture a day without seeing her.

__________

It’s accidental when they touch. It’s the briefest of touches, a brush of their fingertips as she passes him the book he requested, but his skin tingles as though she branded him. Her lips sound out the title to confirm before she gives him the book, carefully and reluctantly as though handing over her newborn. Her hands are soft. His calloused brown skin contrasts sharply with her pale smoothness, and he decides to paint it when he gets home. He uses a large canvas he was saving for a rainy day and the oil paints he hasn’t touched in three years. The painting is only their hands and the book between them, and it’s his favorite.

__________

He’s sketching her eyelashes when it happens. She’s at her desk, all the way across the room from where he’s sitting. It’s an unusually busy day for the shop, with three customers strolling around at the same time. She draws a long sip from the steaming mug besides her — he always wonders what it is that she drinks: coffee? Tea? — and looks up.

Her eyes meet his, and he knows she feels it too. The pencil drops from his hand and he stands up half-panicked. His eyes stay glued hers as he walks towards her, resulting in him bumping into many tables, chairs, and shelves. She’s frozen in place. Her face is still, too, but he knows he sees the flickers of shock and recognition in her eyes.

Soulmates.

He knows he looks half-drunk as he stumbles towards her, tripping over the bag someone left on the floor. She finally blinks. Although he’s still caught under her trace, she recovers from her shock enough to open her mouth.  Her lips form the beginning of a word and she starts to speak — make just one sound in that flowing voice of hers — when suddenly arms close in around her. They circle her waist, holding her, and she turns around to face the owner of the arms. His chest hurts as he loses sight of her eyes.

“Tomas?” Her voice is saying, and Cassian feels like it is muffled, as though he is underwater. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to surprise you for our anniversary.” The man’s voice is raspy and deep. Cassian watches as the man picks up her bag and puts it on his shoulder. “I already got your boss to agree to let you off early. C’mon, we’ve got a reservation at our favorite restaurant.” The man takes a step back, emerging from behind her into Cassian’s line of sight. He notices the man’s self-satisfied grin first, then his gelled, dark blond hair, his navy suit, and gold Rolex. She glanced around the shop, checking that everything is in order before she leaves. Her eyes meet his, just for a moment, before flicking away. As though she can’t bear to test the connection between them, not here, not now.

Gucci black leather Oxford shoes tap impatiently against the floor. The man slips an arm around her waist, tugging her towards the door, and Cassian sees her ever-fierce eyes go dead. The energy, the fight, the strength that always seems to line her body leaves as she lets herself be escorted out of the shop. She spares him one final glance before the door swings shut behind her, and he almost wishes she hadn’t. It hurts but he can’t forget it, as much as he tries. It’s seared onto the back of his eyelids and he can’t even try to draw anything else. It haunts him, inspires him and torments him. The image of her staring back at him, just a spark of longing and wistfulness in her eyes, as she steps into the sunset, the man’s arms trapping her, pulling her away from him.

__________

Permanent taglist:

@grandma-noob-lord

@thewayshedreamed

@courtofjurdan

@maastrash

@awesomelena555

@theoverlyenthusiasticwriter

@callmestarky

@cass-nes

@perseusannabeth

@bookstantrash

@stardelia

@b00kworm

@ghostlyrose2

@sjmships

@yeeyeetotheskeeskee

@dancing--devils

@sjm-things

@ireallyshouldsleeprn

@claralady

@illyrianshadowhunter

@my-fan-side

@dreamingofalba

@thatsowlmazing

@that-golden-lyre

@superspiritfestival

@inkedstarlight

@jsprsfhy

@vasudharaghavan

@swankii-art-teacher

@anne-reads

@cookiemonsterwholovesbooks

@laylaameer01

@jungtaekwoonie-is-life

@rowaelinismyotp

@bakingandbooks3

@notmewrongbitch

Nessian Taglist:

@makainight

@nahthanks

@cupcakey00

@nessiantrashh

@frosted-crackers

@nehemikkele

Let me know if you want to be added / removed from a tag list!

[trutimeline]

idislikecispeople, The Most Infamous Dyscourse Blogger: Part 1.0, Rumors

idislikecispeople, also known as many names throughout her time on Tumblr (such as Adele, Kat, Mami, Samantha and Sayaka), was a former Tumblr blogger who became infamous for coining the term "tucute", among many other controversial things she has posted on her blogs. This was supposed to be one, very long masterpost about her, but Tumblr's post editor is a bitch and won't let me do that.

In this post, I'll be debunking or confirming rumors commonly spread about idislikecispeople. The rest of my posts about her will each be dedicated to a specific controversial belief she held or situations she got into. For simplicity's sake, I'll be referring to idislikecispeople as Kat for the rest of this post and future ones.

Rumors

Kat Coined the Terms "Truscum" and "Tucute"

Verdict: Partially True

Kat coined the term tucute, but she did not coin the terms truscum or transmedicalist.

Here's a screenshot of Kat's original definition of a tucute:

Transcript:

What is Tucute?

What does tucute mean?

Tucute is basically just the opposite of truscum, it’s a term and community for trans, nonbinary, and/or non-cis individuals created to separate anti-truscum from truscum and to serve as a safe place from truscum and from cis people, where they believe that being trans requires dysphoria, we do not,where they think that being trans is a medical condition, we do not,and where they deny numerous gender identities on the basis that it “discredits the trans community” we do not.

What are the prerequisites to be a part of the tucute community?

You have to be trans, nonbinary, and/or non-cis in general

You have to accept all pronouns and gender identities

You haveto believe that dysphoria is not necessary to be trans

You have to dislike truscum

You cannot side with truscum or believe in their ideology

You cannot misgender anyone no matter how mad they make you

You cannot be an ableist whatsoever

Did you invent the tucute community? Why?

I indeed did coin the tucute term and community and anyone who says otherwise are creeps who are trying to steal it from me and redefine it for their own nefarious doings. I started this community so anti-truscum could separate themselves from truscum and cis people who are a part of the truscum community, it serves as a safe space from both truscum and cis people.

I’m cis, can I be tucute if I believe in your movement and want to help?

No, you can’t be tucute if you’re cis, you can only be a tucute ally, and you need to be sure to never speak for or over a trans person.

I see a lot of tucuties being just as harmful as truscum, what will you do about it?

There isn’t much I can do to them other than ask them to stop aligning with the tucute community, and of course, that doesn’t mean they will. Also be noted that truscum and cis people will pretend to be tucute just to tarnish the name of the tucute community, so tread lightly, you might be talking to a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

Spread the word, use the tag #tucute and join the army today!

[A digital drawing of Sayaka Miki from Puella Magi Madoka Magica in her magical girl form, with a banner underneath her reading "Tucute 4 U!"]

(source) (source)

Kat Was a Cisgender Woman Who Lied About Being a Transgender Woman

Verdict: False

This rumor primarily comes from a post on Kat's oldest known Tumblr blog, chromaghost, where she claims that she wasn't MTF and only tagged a selfie as such because she thought that transgender people were "cool".

Transcript:

Anonymous asked: are you a mtf? i seen it tagged on one of your photos.

No lol. I wanted to post it to the tag because transgender people are cool :3

(source) (source) (source)

However, Kat addressed this post and made it clear she very much was a transgender woman multiple times on her later blogs. This claim can also be confirmed with nude photos Kat posted online, which I don't feel comfortable spreading, so you'll just have to trust me on that one. I also don't feel comfortable directly encouraging you to go and dig up those nudes, as most of her nude photos were either taken when she was a minor, spread without her consent and/or were uploaded because people pressured her into posting nudes to "prove" she was a transgender woman.

Transcript:

Anonymous asked: you bound with ace bandage in one of your selfies. i don't know what to think about you anymore. according to some people you're a 27 year old cis woman scamming us, but you say you're a 22 year old trans woman. i want to trust you but i don't know if i can. i'm sorry.

Rest assured I’m not 27 years old lol. What you’re referring to is a less than graceful ~art piece~ we did (”Playing a Boy” or something) on deviantART when we were 16/17 (?) and really ill-informed. I ask you to not take that as how I stand currently – as I have learned so much more since, and I have a penis and I was designated male at birth because of it (feel free to purchase a passcode to our nsfw blog to see for yourself). At the time we were developing breast tissue but still had to appear as a ‘boy.’ Don’t bind with Ace bandages, kids, it can damage your rib cage, something we didn’t know at the time.

(source) (source)

Transcript:

[A picture of two prescriptions, estradiol and spironolactone, both prescribed to Adele Sheffield.]

grandtran still gonna think I photoshopped it or what

(source)

Transcript:

Anonymous asked: In other words, you aren't gonna cough up the pics because you know you can't fake that shit because you're actually cis. Cool. BTW why do you keep changing your story about the blog, and if the blog was run by you when you were in denial about being trans because of self hate, why were the pics tagged mtf and you were constantly saying trans people were cool?

Yeah I’m not gonna do something for y’all and get nothing in return except more doubt from you, you see how one sided that kind of request is? Also its technically considered sexual harassment, just because its on the internet, you’re a coward (whats your username btw?), and you think I’m cis and you want me to prove time and time again to you that I’m dmab doesn’t justify sexually soliciting someone when they’re not comfortable in being solicited – for free no less.

At first I genuinely had no memory of that blog, it was only active for all of 2 months and for some reason I moved onto a new email and new tumblr, and I haven’t the foggiest why. As for the whole “me claiming to not be ~mtf~” I don’t have any memories from that time, I can only assume it was a lot of dysphoria fueled self-hatred and wanting to be seen/pass as a cis girl lesbian.

If you’re really gonna solicit nudes from a trans woman (a second time) as they do sex work to try and stay on their feet without offering anything in return just so your transmisogynistic ass can get off to trying to tell me my dick is fake isn’t classy at all. I perish the thought of what you’re parents would think of this behavior from you. But yeah, feel free to send some money to my paypal so I can get the gender markers on my records changed because that’s gonna cost a lot apparently, and I’ll definitely send you the dick pics you want. :)

(source) (source) (source)

Transcript:

[A picture of a a hospital bracelet on Kat's wrist. The patient's name is Adele Sheffield and her sex is labeled as "M".]

(source)

Kat Lied About Having Diabetes To Get Money From Tumblr Users

Verdict: False

This doesn't need much commentary from me, just view the screenshots below.

Transcript:

To the people who keep harping on me buying a $15 video game for my mental health 7 MONTHS ago “with my donation money,” well, here you go, some proof, links and screenshots provided

So for everyone spreading misinformation about me spending $15 on a video game for my mental health, here’s a full list of reasons why there is no way, shape, or form I spent my paypal money on it:

Yes, I spent $15 of my own money after selling one of my possessions, not denying it:

[A screenshot of a Tumblr post by Kat where she shows off a copy of Fall Out: New Vegas, marked with a price of $14.99. The date of the post is marked as July 21, 2014 at 06:28.39 PM.]

Be sure to look at the date, July 21st, 2014 6:28 PM. Now lets look at my first donation post asking for help:

[A screenshot of a Tumblr post by Kat where she asks for donations to be able to afford insulin because she has no insurance. The date of the post is marked as July 20, 2014 at 08:14.00 PM.]

Hmm, one day before the purchase of said game, July 20th 2014 at 8:14 PM. Now, I’ve never heard of a video game store — much less a non-chain video game store accepting payment for video games in the form of virtual Amazon gift cards, have you? Oh, but you’re gonna say, “well you bought the game with your paypal donations anyway!” Well, here’s exhibit C:

[Another screenshot of a separate post made by Kat where she is also asking for donations to be able to afford insulin. The date of the post is marked as July 23, 2014 at 12:27.46 PM.]

Again, looking at the date of this posting which is the original donations post, you can see it was posted on July 23rd, 2014 at 12:27 PM, a full 2 days after I had bought the game. Now, if there’s no way for me to use Amazon gift cards for a real life video game store, then how can I go back in time a minimum of 2 full days to give past me $15 to buy said game, hm? This isn’t even accounting for the fact that I didn’t even have my own bank account associated with it until over a week later, and it surely doesn’t account for the fact that it takes up to 5 days to transfer from paypal to your bank account. All the dates are linked to the original unedited posts so you can see for yourself, and for added measure my first deposit was on August 14th, 2014:

[A screenshot of a deposit made by Kat. The date is marked as 08/14/14.]

Oh but yeah, anti-sjs, truscum, and the like took damniwishidthoughtofabettername’s postthey used to gaslight us with misinformation and you all bought it. Tell me how I could misuse donations that I could not use outside of Amazon and money I didn’t even start receiving until a full two days later, let alone the fact that there’s no way I could have transferred said money and used it two days prior as of the date of the paypal donations post.

I hope some of y’all could reblog this and get the word out, I’m sick and tired of people buying into that misinformation that person did solely to gaslight me as a means to try and disrupt my donations drive.

(source) (source) (source) (source) (source) (source) (source)

Transcript:

[A selfie of Kat holding up a vial of Novolin to the camera.]

Hey anon, I don’t feel comfy giving you my receipts (because doxxing is a thing) but here you go, a selfie with my most recent insulin purchase. 👽

(source) (source) (source) (source) (source) (source) (source)

Transcript:

Anonymous asked: Getting desperate for money again I see. How is your fake diabetes lately. I bet your blood sugar is like 800 this time and you're still able to be alive somehow.

You got me, I’m ~totally faking~

[A selfie of Kat. In the background several items used by diabetics are seen such as insulin syringes, glucose tablets, a blood sugar tester and test strips.]

[A picture that gives us a closer look at the background of the previous selfie.]

[A selfie of Kat holding up two vials, one of Lantus and the other of Humalog.]

Gee, must be one dedicated faker, right? To have hundreds of dollars of insulin equipment and insulin itself. Hmmm… Insulin syringes, glucose tablets, a blood sugar tester and test strips.. oh and insulin, hmmmm….

Oh and because you didn’t learn from last time you don’t die instantly when your blood sugar goes over 600 lol, something anyone who studies endocrinology can tell you, and I would know, being a diabetic, having to be hospitalized numerous times for ketoacidosis where the blood sugar has been too high for too long. Things you clearly do not know and you’re just jumping on the disableist bandwagon. I have an idea of who you are anyway, just doing this for future reference.

(source)

[gukiee]

Also can I just say @ the anon or anons who ATTACKED PEOPLE over the whole headline thing to the point of making them feel so shitty they deleted gif sets they worked hard on: you can LITERALLY go f*ck urself tbh