#i'm not a great writer but i greatly appreciate everyone who has ever taken the time to play with her :')

[balsamina]

ah, we have fun here on balsamina dot tumblr dot com...

[wonderofasunrise]

Hello, I'm M! I'm an Indonesian bisexual woman in my late 20s and I'm the Chief of Emergency Medicine in the ER Fic and Fandom Discord server. It's a fun and inclusive space run by six queer women who met through the ER fandom - for all things ER and for everyone in the community.

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What drew you to being a part of the server? Zoë came up with the idea of a Discord server for ER fanfic writers last year, and I was immediately sold on the concept of a space where fic writers could discuss writing stuff including different AUs and headcanons. Over time the server has evolved into a space for all things ER where people can share other types of content (fanart, gifs, memes etc) and talk about various aspects of the show and the fandom in general. I enjoy having good discussions with other ER fans, and while our favourite characters/ships/headcanons may differ we always discuss things in a civil (and often humorous) manner without attacking those with different opinions. In addition, as someone whose background is grossly under-represented in (Western) media I love being able to offer different perspectives on things related to the show like medicine, education, and healthcare to people who may not be constantly exposed to them outside the server.

Who is your favourite ER character? Kerry Weaver - no doubt. LGBTQ representation in Western media has grown so much since her groundbreaking storyline on the show, yet she remains the only queer TV character I can fully relate to. She's a queen, what can I say?

In addition, I always have a soft spot for Susan Lewis, whom I ship with Kerry greatly, as her level-headedness quite often offers balance to some of the show's storylines. Then there's Abby Lockhart, whose character development impresses me so much, and Carol Hathaway who was the reason I started watching the show in the first place (can you tell I'm a simp for Julianna Margulies?).

Which lesser-used channel on the server do you particularly appreciate? Being a non-native English speaking fic writer for an American show can be...well, challenging, so "translation-localisation" is great to ensure accuracy when it comes to vocabulary and other related stuff, especially as I'm not accustomed to using American spelling, terms, and slang words in my writing lol

Favourite scene, episode, season? Gosh, this is hard... One scene that I can always replay is, unsurprisingly, Kerry's coming out speech (which I have memorised lol). Another one is Robert Romano signing, "Take care of your dad." to Peter Benton's deaf son Reese which is just heartwarming in so many ways. I also have a soft spot for one particular underrated scene—from "Just as I Am", when Kerry is telling Susan about meeting her biological mother. Susan is genuinely happy to hear it, and her reaction shows how far they've come along as colleagues and wives. As for favourite episodes, "Love's Labor Lost" is a masterpiece though not one that I can watch over and over again, and I have a special place in my heart for "Secrets & Lies" for shits and giggles. Tbh I'm not sure what my favourite season is, but I usually say season 3 because it's the first season featuring both my ladies Sherry Stringfield and Laura Innes as main cast members 😂

Have you ever taken an IRL trip to the ER? Exactly three times. Once when I got dengue fever (#tropicalcountrythingz) at 14 and had to spend a couple of hours in the ER while waiting for an available bed, once when I was travelling to my mum's hometown and had an annoying allergic reaction to something I ate, and most recently about a couple of years ago I was on my way to a work event and very suddenly fell and sprained my ankle which landed me in the ER and caused me to use a crutch for a few weeks. Every now and then my affected leg bothers me (as I have a history of injuries in the same leg) and on worse days I use a crutch or a cane—hand me a lab coat and I'd do the perfect Asian!Kerry cosplay, basically.

If you’d like to join the server you can do so using the link below - everyone is welcome!

Join Link: https://discord.gg/9wnkspZvaJ

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INCLUSIVE

We at County do not tolerate discrimination against other members for any reason.

Please be mindful that this server is open to anyone who agrees to the rules. This means members may be from any background, ethnicity, faith, gender, nationality, sexuality, and time zone! Across the mods we don’t actually have a single person from the USA or Canada! (Minors are welcome, however, only in accordance with Discord and their host country’s rules. Please ensure you check the “Safe” section of rules - posting tomorrow.)

We have received complaints that some individuals speak over others’ experiences living outside of a white, western experience. Therefore, please be mindful of how you speak about your experiences, ensuring that you do not use any positions of privilege to speak over others.

We have “physicians-of-color”, “girls-club”, and "ada-compliance" channels which are safe spaces for, respectively, POC, women and women-aligned non-binary people, and those who identify as disabled (inclusive of all disabilities.).

We are open to creating new channels for other groups’ identities, please just ask.

When posting any content that may be harmful or triggering to others, please use Content Warnings (CWs). Where a CW is required, please create a Thread by hovering over a message and pressing the '#' with a speech bubble.

If a content warning is not being used, anyone can say the word 'sharps' to trigger a bot response that will remind people in the conversation to create a new thread with the CW as the thread title. (The person who has said 'sharps' is under no obligation to explain themselves, however, they may suggest a reason if they choose to do so.)

Inside threads, any sensitive language or content that is shared under a CW should be suffixed and with '##################################' at the end of each post so that this content does not appear on the main channel chat.

Any further questions should be addressed in a message to a mod, or alternatively tag @Admin. If you have an issue with something that’s being discussed, or with another member, DM one of us.

[witch-hazels-musings]

tw// nsfw mention

hi hazel, i know i can't say much that hasn't already been said, but i just want to apologize for ever making you feel unappreciated/used for your talents. you are an incredible writer and you bring life to the characters in such a beautiful way, but much, much more than that, you are so sweet and caring to everyone. i truly love the community here that you've given to us, talking to you and to other anons on here, sharing ideas and advice just venting and listening to everyone else vent, and it's unfortunate that some of us have taken all that you do for us for granted. this is a safe space in the truest form and i'm so sad that we haven't done enough to help you see how important you are to us.

on top of what everyone has said, i also want to add how much your work has helped me personally. after a terrible relationship, i find myself unable to see myself in romantic and intimate situations anymore, but your writings have really helped me re-acclimate myself with the thought of romantic and physical affection, and i know your works aren't substitutions for actual therapy, but they have helped greatly and i'd hate for myself or anyone else who loves your writings to lose such an unequivocally bright gift as yours due to our own negligence. you are so loved and appreciated, and i hope we can do better to make you truly feel how beloved you are in this community. thank you for all that you do. if it ever becomes too much, pls do not hesitate to take a step back and take time for yourself. i'm sorry if this message doesn't seem genuine or if it feels like it derailed from the original purpose of my apology. i hope you have a great rest of your night and a great week!

- 🧸anon

hey friend, I appreciate the time it took to write this message. I hate that I caused you any worry and to make you apologize. My intention was not to force a single person to take the responsibility of the weight I was feeling. I cannot ask you to bear that. 

having each of you reach out to offer support for another literally makes me so happy. I’ve seen the knowledge you’ve shared and advice you’ve given - we are a big community here and I hope my weakness hasn’t hindered others want to be a part of what we all built

from the start, being able to write things that made people feel valued, worthy, loved, was always what I wanted - it’s still what I want. My biggest barrier is making sure they are really helping rather than hurting, and while I wish I could write all your pains away, that honestly isn’t possible - i can empathize with all my heart at the pain anyone has experienced and it takes time to write those types of fics ( it seems people are constantly reassuring me that I can take that time - so thank you for that reminder ) 

Your message is invaluable to me because you shared your voice. I cannot thank you enough for being with me so long and supporting me the way you do <3 so bless you kind human for your time