#i'm just so happy cus it took me YEARS to get it sorted

[dreki-fern]

I also have good news for my MBTI type and enneagram which makes me actually impressed, shocked and I feel like I can know myself better despite all my issues I have within that.

Come to find out, I use Si pretty well or at least its one of my functions and i'm def a sensory which took a long time for me to understand, I do check off some things for intuition (we all have it to some degree) But I check more boxes off for sensor than I do intuition. I might be an ISFJ/ISTJ (or ESTJ/ESFJ) Which shocked me but makes a lot of sense! I'm happy to have finally figured things out!

[coffee-writesthings]

Fuck it, engiespy but it's the Cinderella plotline with my own twist on it.

Spy in place of Cinderella (I'm gonna give him the name of Jean Laurent, and Engineer in place of Prince charming (so he's Prince Conagher/Dell Conagher cus that's his canon name that we know of)

The wicked stepsisters and the wicked mother are Miss Pauling, Maggie (Saxton Hale's ex-wife in the comics) and the Administrator. I hope I characterized them in a way that is nice to read :)

Also this is gonna have more than one part. I think like 7? They'll all be reblogged from this one though so less of an issue on my end

Jean didn't truly know what he was doing when he had heard of the ball being thrown by the Conagher Family. He must've been outside when it happened, if the commotion meant anything to him. All he wanted to do was get the shopping done for his bosses.

A few words could be picked out from the cacophony of voices, "The Conaghers are throwing a ball". It was repeated so many times. Along with "What am I going to wear?"

He just groaned, instead opting to sneak his way back home with what he had. If nothing else, everyone would be happy to hear about an opportunity to throw themselves at the most influential people in the land.

The Conaghers are known, far and wide, for their incredible abilities with machinery. They'd mostly focused on defensive turrets, and many sorts of dispensers for anything from fresh water and some food to magical healing substances. And don't get anyone started on the teleporters. At all the hot spots of every town there are three high-level teleporters at least. Someone could get from town square to the castle and back multiple times before any official guards would be able to get there.

It was a problem which necessitated itself, in Jean's opinion. So when he saw one of these teleporters, he didn't mind a bit of sabotage. With a trusty wrench he got to work, under the shadows cast by mid-morning, the sentries wouldn't work nearly as well. He wouldn't die for his crimes here.

All it took was loosening a few bolts here, taking out a screw or two there... et voila! One teleporter that wouldn't work for several hours.

A smug grin crossed his face as he put the tool back into his pocket and took the food bags from off the ground.

"Well howdy there," came a southern drawl which nearly scared him out of his skin, "what's your business with these here teleporters?"

Quick, find a convincing lie for this guard. "Oh, don't you know? I'm new to the engineering field. I wanted to see how all the experienced people do it."

He gave a tilt of his head and lifted one eyebrow, clearly not convinced. "Alrighty. Tell me about this thing as if I'm... oh, five years old."

"I'm sorry?"

"I can repeat myself, if you want."

"No, I heard you. It's just... isn't this the sort of thing a teacher tells me first?"

"Nah, I don't believe in that crap. Tell me how you think it works, I'm curious." He leaned against a wall, and gestured towards him.

"Well..." he wracked his brain for the English words to describe teleporters, "it takes people from one place to another, much faster than anything else. You would only have to stand on an entrance for a moment to travel to its exit."

He nodded, a small smirk on his otherwise-neutral face.

"And I've seen upgrades take place on exits that will have the same effect on an entrance. I don't know how that happens though, and I don't think you do either."

"Yeah, that's accurate. Those blueprints I dug through never did explain that either."

"Blueprints?" Then the realization dawned on him. This wasn't just some guard patrolling for miscreants and the like, this was Dell Conagher. He was the man who took his grandfather's nonsense ramblings and built things from them. The man could definitely be allowed to do harm without consequences, being first in line for the crown. His eyes widened, just a little.

"Yeah, my granddad passed 'em down to me, one way or another." His expression darkened momentarily, "But that's all history anyway! What's your name?"

"I'm... I don't have a name." That was a stupid, stupid lie. If he so desired, the man in front of him could use one of those teleporters right now, and start listing names of his relatives from a registry.

"Alright, I won't push. Now, do you wanna know my least favorite feature on these things?"

What in the-? What is he doing?? It wouldn't be a bad idea to listen, but why would he even tell him in the first place? He figured it would be best to humor him, lest he decide cruelty is his nature for the day. "What is it?"

"They're all the same damn color. I can never tell which one is which, and I don't know how to make them differentiated. Sure, signs could help but there's not much that'll do if somebody can't read or if it's dark out. And nobody's listened to me or suggested anything that we could do, it's frustratin' as all hell."

He cocked his head to the side, "I never thought about that. I've only been annoyed by how many there are. It's ridiculous."

"Right? I've been meaning to figure out how to make them bigger or something but nothing's worked. It's technically better this way for other reasons, but god it's gotta be annoying to use every day."

He hummed in agreement. The crowding was the main reason he never used them in the first place, after all.

"And I mean that's probably part of why this ball is being thrown for me. Lord knows I'm not planning on getting married to some lady any time soon, long as I have more work to do. It's what I tell them at least."

He squinted, just a little bit. Was he saying what he thought he was saying?

"Ah, sorry, I'm rambling. You don't need to know about any of that." he rubbed the back of his neck, while asking nonchalantly, "Will I see you there? I bet if you had something nice to wear you could have your pick of the crowd, easy."

"Are you encouraging competition at your own ball?"

"That's part of the fun, isn't it?"

"For the record, you won't be seeing me there. As much as it would be nice, I have a laundry list of work to do today."

"That's a shame. Have a nice day now, sir."

He'd called him 'sir'. Why?? If anything, he should be the one referring to the other with respectful words. Once the man was out of his sight, Jean scurried back home on foot, with the bags in hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at home, the complaints began immediately.

"Jean," Pauling asked, "we need warm water for our baths!"

"Jean, I need you to mend my dress and shine my shoes for tonight!" Cried Maggie.

"Jean, I don't want you getting any ideas of possibly having tonight off, just because we are off at the Conagher ball. You're going to clean the whole manor tonight," Helen's voice dripped with venom, "s'il te plaît."

He hadn't even had a chance to set down any of the food he bought. Taking a breath, he noted the requests that he could take care of immediately. When the bags were on the counters, and then sorted into the fridge, cabinets, and bread box, he could then move onto something else.

"Miss Pauling, I am taking care of your water right now. Do you want bath salts, or florals?"

"Florals, please."

"Pauling, you don't need to give any respect to him. 'Pleases' are for people who don't make a living washing our floors."

"I- florals."

"And?" Helen pressed.

She didn't look into his eyes when she said, just loud enough to be heard, "I want florals, you good-for-nothing servant."

"Right away." He clenched his jaw a little. "And, Madame Maggie, I will start on your dress and shoes as soon as I am able."

She huffed in response, "Administrator, why do we only have one servant? Two or three would be much better."

"I've told you why many times, there are rules. For a family of three, there can only be one servant."

"I should be so lucky to get married into a large family like the Conaghers."

"Lucky indeed."

Spy took care of the bath fairly quickly, though still needing to boil some water for it, which Miss Pauling tried to help with. He barred her from it with a stern look.

He closed the bathroom's door quietly, leaving her to her bath. What next? Ah, yes, shining shoes for one of the least pleasant women he knew, then mending the holes she always managed to get into her dresses. He groaned, but moved onto the next task. If there was any hope of a night's rest, he'd have to get through all of it quickly, so he wouldn't scrub the floors until dawn.

"Madame Maggie," he knocked on the door to her chambers, "I need the shoes you want shined, please."

"Such manners!" She exclaimed as she opened the door with momentary glee. Even seeing his face displeased her. That was fine, the feeling was mutual.

He waited with two hands held out, waiting for some ridiculous contraption to be placed in them. For a ball being thrown by the Conagher family, it was hard to expect anything less than seduction by all means necessary and extremely painful.

The shoes plopped into his hands with an eye roll were actually fairly simplistic. Tall, chunky black shoes, made soft by many wears. He gave them a tentative bend in the middle, and found that they were sturdy as rocks where the majority of her foot would be. These were great shoes for her purposes, which seemed to be to dance forever-- maybe to impress the prince, maybe to attract any mate.

"Thank you." He grimaced. "They'll work."

[pretty-house-pretty-garden]

Fam Lovemail For Owen/Mi Papá Henry!! (@confetti-and-confessions)

Today it's been 1 year since I met my Owen canonmate!

Neither of us knew of Outsiders yet then...

We met through fnaf, actually :)

Mi papá, Henry. Who I had been looking for for years. He doesn't even really remember me in his canon there but he still claimed me as his kid gladly.

He took me in. I felt so fuckin lonely. I was coming from a situation where my life felt like it was falling appart- and yet... he made it all better.

For the first time I found someone who wasnt only my father from media but acted like an actual father. He was a real dad. He cared and he held me close when I cried and suffered the aftermaths of probably the worst months of my life.

He didnt have to. But he did. He even said a couple times he wanted to. He said he'd be there for me whenever I needed him. And I never understood how serious he was about that... I- I still dont, not fully..

But I know he means it. He's always been there for me no matter how fucked up I am. He's never turned me down for being "too much" for him.

And I wanna be there for him aswell. I hope I'm doing a good job <:]

Star's one of the best people I have in my life. I never wanna loose dust and I hope we stay together many many years more!!

Star makes me so so happy, so much so that this year I expected fathers day excited. So much so that I made a gift for dust and waited excited to give it to dust that day

I just love you so much dad!! Thank you for being there for me.. really, thank you do much ♡

here's a few sweet memories from our shared medias:

FNaF: times I got in trouble for following Mikey and his friends into stuff. I wasn't scared of talking to you and calling for your help... while the other 4 were scared of their parents finding out I needed to tell you as soon as possible, ask for help. I also remember sometimes after school you'd take Charlie and I to this one little store of sorts.. I'd always get a box of orange juice and we'd get a family package of cookies :D! You would also sometimes buy some gummies without us noticing and hide it in your room, you'd give us some without mom knowing after dinner every once in a while... hehe.. when she found out she'd just ask for her share aswell <3 I know when I was older I did something similar and bought the same brand of juice anytime I found it available.. it reminded me of home, of you <:] ♡

OutsidersSMP: you taught me how to start a fire out of just sticks and stones... how to tie a knot... let me stay in your house whenever I felt lonely or was having a bad time sleeping, remembering stuff about people I lost... you always protected me when I went in the maze even when I didnt listen to you... we cooked together and even baked sometimes... we'd make strawberry "pie"/tart... and mango smoothies! Also!! Just hugging !! Mostly in private at first cus u didnt want people knowing you were a hugging person hehe <3

Empires: I remember the first time I called you dad.... it was an accident and I was super embarassed... BUT! You made me feel less awkward about it.... and I felt better.. eventually it became the norm... it was super nice. I remember when you gave me some beautiful copper earrings shaped like wheat.. the glowberries made me so happy too!! I loved surprise gifts and tried to get you some too sometimes <3 Like sunflowers along with the usual food delivery :) ! I also remember when you visited me after the duels with Xornoth.. you were really worried.. hehe.. oops- oh and when we reunited.. You were the only person who remembered me after so many years.. the only soul that stayed the same.. <33

Hatchetfield: I remember going out for soft serve ice cream with you!! Specially as a kid, and then we went years later with Richie and we both felt like little kids again :)!! We also ate burgers at home and made you watch anime with us... hehehe it was the best day ever!! Thank you so much for being always there for me uncle Paul ♡

FAITH: a specific timeline where you saved me.. I genuinly felt so physically sick and wasn't even sure how I was still even alive. But you took care of me. I remember weeping and letting out howls of pain. And you would feed me, somehow. Sit next to me despite how terrible I looked. I think once you could tell I felt ugly and scary after seeing myself in a mirror, cause soon after you offered to do my hair, brush it and put accessories on it, even got me a new dress... it made me feel like a normal real girl one more time. Thank you, Father. ♡

I could keep going on and on for hours, but I hope you understand at least a bit of how much you mean to me ♡

cause there's not enough words in this world or any other to express it well <3

[my-reality-my-rules]

hii , so

i have a bf in my cr …but, my relationship isnt that great ( he is very toxic sometimes ). im going to get a bit personal, so u can understand (: at the time i discovered reality shifting, which was 2 years ago , it was ALSO the year i got close with my current bf. i was very close to shifting, but i chose to enter in a relationship w him and NOT shift ( nd of course that left me really sad , cus i had a connection and still have with that dr ). but, summimg up , he was very abusive and he kindof cheated on me 3 times . after that, we took a break and i found another person who was also really toxic . then it didnt work out , n i tried shfiting again, with another dr, got really close, and then i decided to leave it to resume my relationship with that person who i took a break and is now my current bf.

i know this is like … im dumb , cus he cheated but i like him REALLY much. n thats the problem , i think that this is making it difficult for me to detach from my cr. i am not happy in my relationship , so i decided to get back AGAIN at shifting. and i pretend to have a s/o in that dr , so i dont know if i should do something about my cr situation ??? cus its blocking me from going to my dr ( im not sure about that and thats why im asking ) and also , i dont know if its considered ""cheating "" ??

i mean , that is very confusing but i do hope u understand and hopefully answer my question ಥ‿ಥ …

[thanks for this ask!]

first things first, I'd like to apologise for taking this long to answer your message. i know the topic you mentioned can be sensitive, and, in a sense, urgent. now, I'm not the best person to ask questions to when it comes to relationships, but i can try giving you some general advice.

- - -

let's divide your message into parts. from what I've read, i can sort it into two topics: the CR S/O issue (and how it affected your progress with shifting), having a DR S/O.

with the CR issue, what i can tell you is this: i hope that you were able to sort things out with him, because what he did simply wasn't right. your own feelings wouldn't matter if he cheated on you anyway. it's a tough truth to learn—but the fact that he did it alone signifies that he isn't trustworthy. of course, you could take all the time you want as a break and refrain from shifting when you dealt with this issue—but just know that it shouldn't hold you back from actually shifting itself.

apologies if this question is a bit sensitive; would you call it a trauma response, pretending to have an S/O in your DR? and in doing so, does it make you feel more fulfilled or content?

you don't have to pretend you have an S/O there, because you can simply script someone in.

as a general rule of thumb—no, shifting to be with another person isn't cheating. it's a bit tricky to discuss, but the gist is that the DR individual is in another reality, and doesn't necessarily count as cheating in the conventional form. in my opinion, though, i don't think of it that way, so long as (if you're still in the relationship in your CR) your partner knows and understands what you're doing.

and my answer is yes; yes, do something about the CR situation. i can't tell you exactly what it is that you can act upon. but if you leave it to fester, you might end up making things worse for yourself. no matter that you have feelings for your boyfriend, he's committed an act of wrong against you, and you're not obligated to remain with him. him being a source of your affections doesn't mean he has the right to it, especially when he's already done something to abuse those affections.

if you feel as if this held you back from shifting, then yes, try to sort it out first.

[miyamoratsumuu]

thankuu for the tags yen & @nnnyxie !! 🙋🏻‍♀️ ALSO OUT OF TOPIC BUT YEN I LOVED UR IWA MINI SMAU SERIES PLS THAT WAS MY GIRL DINNER WHEN I READ IT THE OTHER DAY

started writing-

it was around the time of the pandemic, so 2021! I started writing for mha, then around later I got into haikyuu, and here we are!!

started blogging-

2021 as well! 8/20 to be exact. I had a blog before this one, I took a short break from it, and at the time I didn't really know how to use tumblr yet, so wanted to start a new one

followers-

I currently have 328 lovely followers!! I was actually so surprised when I checked on my tumblr last january this year. I sort of went m.i.a. for a long while since I think july 2023? and back then I only had 100-ish followers so imagine my surprise to come back to more than a hundred more!! I'm honestly so grateful for each of u, ily guys sm 😞

communication-

I LOVEEE interacting with everyone here!! though I am pretty awkward for the first few interactions, it actually makes me so happy to talk to others! ESPECIALLY MOOTS AGHH I LOVE AND ADORE YOU GUYS SM even though I rarely talk to u guys cus I have a tendency to overthink how I'd talk to you or what I should reply ahaha but nonetheless pls pls don't be hesitant to reach out to me!! I'm always welcome to talking to new people and making new friends!!

likes-

I don't really keep track of the likes on my posts, but I really do appreciate those who interact with my posts! whether it's a like, reblog, or comment, I think of it as a sign that u guys like my work!! and that makes me happy:) I don't rlly mind how many likes a post gets either, I'm just glad to share my work on here

requests-

my requests are currently open!! tho I do have a specific set of rules when it comes to sending in one, I am open to reading and doing your requests as long as they go by the guidelines:) I'm not the fastest worker or writer either, so please be patient with me when it comes to finishing your requests!! I hope that they are up to your expectations once I finish them as well:)

writing-

I enjoy it alot!! it excites me how I could almost turn my ideas into a reality through it. it's a hobby I didn't think would bring me here! I'm so glad to have made new friends, and be in this community bcs I started writing

works i'm proud of-

I'm initially proud of all of my works since I procrastinated while working on every single on of them, and I'm just happy to have been able to finish them, though I really like my "and they were roommates" akaashi fic! I come back to it from time to time, and end up thinking that akaashi may be ooc in that fic, but I still have a soft spot for it

no pressure tags!!: @valeriwa @kovu-bunnbunn and go ahead to anyone who'd like to do this as well:)

Behind the scenes of a Tumblr Writer - Tag Game

Hey there, I love behind the scenes and since this is something that's rarely talked about, let me start the chain... if you feel uncomfortable with a question, just skip it. You can add some if you want as well.

Started writing: I wrote my first Harry Potter fanfic at age 10. Started posting around 15,16 years old. I'm now 31, so...

Started blogging: I started on a German fanfiction site around 2010/11 I think. Might have been earlier too, but back then I was mostly reading, no posting. I really started when I got into One Direction (very late, tbh)

Followers: Currently at 961, which is wild to me. I don't even know that many people IRL. I convince myself that half of them are bots tbh, so I don't freak out all the time.

Communication: The people I talk to regularly are: a few writers who answered after I constantly reblogged and commented on their works and a few people who commented and reblogged my work. Writing and blogging on here can be pretty lonely, depending on your personality and the time you're active (I'm from Europe and a lot of my followers seem to be living in Northern America, so there's the Timezone thing) ... And I found that the best way to strike a conversation is to reblog, comment, and to not be shy. I do wish I got more asks, though....

Likes: I actually filter them out. I have 793 original posts up at the moment. It doesn't give me anything to know how many likes a fic has other than to tell me which characters are liked more than others or maybe that one fic does especially well. My activity only shows me comments, asks, reblogs with tags, and answers to my own asks. I live for the tags and the comments.

Requests: I love talking to people about ideas. That's how I started the plotbunny game because I have so many ideas and so little time. And sometimes an idea just doesn't want to be written out fully. Requests are fun because YAY, I get some mail... but then I freak out because I don't really know how to write this NOW and then I freak out because it's been a week already, two weeks, wait, two months? I'd rather have suggestions where people tell me vague things like "I'd love to read something about this side character" or "Have you ever considered this character with a soulmate trope"? because then I don't have the feeling of failing the request when I write it a little bit differently.

Writing: I am a fast writer. I know that's one of my talents. I can churn out a oneshot of 1k words in less than an hour. People read slower than I write. That can suck sometimes because you've just posted this and you want to know what people are thinking but they're not as fast as you are. I do have a lot of ideas. I want to write constantly but my brain doesn't always want to. I am trying to respect that.

There are also certain things that I just feel wrong writing. I cannot write anything suggestive (I also don't like reading it) and everything past that gives me panic attacks. I can hardly write mean characters and jealousy feels so wrong to me that I cannot write it. I've also overdone it with the soulmark trope and now I feel like everything I write about it feels lifeless.

I write best in the mornings before going to work, but I don't have much time there. I don't need special music (but it helps), but I need to have at least some energy left and at best, no distractions. But I have been writing for over 20 years, so I will say experience helps a lot.

Tagging: @revasserium @shoulmate @lemurzsquad @screamin-abt-haikyuu @toomanygoldfish @satorisoup @emmyrosee @reverie-starlight @alienaiver and @writingsofanomnivore and everyone else who wants to join

[admirableadmiranda]

Just a silly rumble of words; I didn't get into any of the works till this very year (first week January), at the loving pushing of a friend who wanted to drag me into the fandom pit. I watched 28 eps of the untamed and couldn't get past that cus of how we were stuck in the past and it was all very depressing and maddening lol. I picked up the novel and had no issues finishing it. To say it was a jarring experience finishing the novel and going into fandom spaces and the overwhelming love and stans of JC, I felt like I had walked into the twilight zone. I kept reading posts on him and thinking I had gotten the name wrong because I was seeing zero link in the slightest(I would even wiki names), then it became undeniable it was definitely 'him'. The fanart was the final nail in the coffin, why was so much of it with wwx and JC speaking after the end; a thing? It was overwhelmingly clear it was a mutual cut off and neither had a desire for the other to be around them. Every form of media I wanted to engage with all had that, I couldn't read fanfics, look at most art, even written analysis posts it was so OOC. I actively went looking for posts on why they liked JC, why they thought this and that, and every time it was just 'but he objectively didnt' 'that didn't happen though' It felt very isolating and confusing because I generally wanted to take an active part in the space. I can't say the JC rewrite was the only issue but rewriting in general was a very big problem in general. I even watched scenes and videos to see if the drama held weight to create this character but even then he was written in a more pitiful and likeable light but I still personally didn't feel it was fully justified. I'm all for liking unlikeable characters but this character wasn't even a shadow of the canon character I knew and I went in wanting and willing to understand and love him. I was (am) beyond excited to find people who did analysis posts and created spaces that follow the novel, I blocked tags, followed blogs, made a little space that was limited content but it was still content. To say I'm just exhausted and frustrated over this whole 'discourse' event, is putting it lightly. I always got push over content that didn't fit my taste but I would just move past it. My friend is even a fan of JC but openly admits to not enjoying the novel so only takes the 'lore' of the drama as real and we've never had any issues, I'll even send those push over posts of JC that come on my tl to them. It feels like we created a home on a mountain, happily existing in peace and then people come storming in saying we're evil and ruining their experience and active haters out to ruin the fandom. It's just bewildering, with all this being said thank you to you and all the other content creators for the content and I'm sorry and sad you're getting harassed for creating it but pls know it's very much appreciated and wanted. (And needed for my sanity lol)

Ah anon, I understand your cql burnout there. I myself had to skip from around the fall of Lotus Pier up to episode 33 in order to actually watch it as the backstory is just too long and really ruins the framing of present day and backstory that the book does so well.

I understand your confusion and frustration there. I had a lot of those same experiences when I joined the fandom, of being confused and bewildered at all this stuff that either vaguely or completely contradicted the book. It took me accidentally stumbling across a blog that actively did not like Jiang Cheng to revive my fandom love and then stumbling into a wonderful friend group that were happy to have me too in order to finally really start enjoying MDZS fandom. Sort of the same thing you did, only with more active pushback against fandom narratives.

Thank you very much for your kind words. It is currently a very frustrating time, but I won’t give in and let them have the tag. I conceded one fight, I won’t give in on this one.

The wheel continues to turn and people move with it. It will not always be this frustrating.

<3

[sheepwasfound]

I think he is/was nervous to show george his face because in that cursed mcc 8 after talk about the face reveal and ily talk dream said to george

'I'm sorry looks matter to you' </3 he took george wanting to see his face in a negative way both of them were upset but george could care less about looks i think it was more about putting a face to your bestfriend and having that association.

when you love someone, you love their face and like to look at it no matter what it looks like, just cus it's them and all you see in it is the person you love. you don't focus on whether something looks bad or whatever. you see them smile and you're happy cus they're happy, and it's that simple. that’s probably how it feels on george’s side of things.

but dream has given me nervous vibes about showing his face to george (though we can't know anything). like when he said he didn't want to show his face to george because he hadn't shaved. how many times had he made some excuse like that in his own head i wonder? george begs him now and again for years, but it's never a good time. he's got a bunch of pimples on his jaw rn. his eyebags are super bad because he hasn't slept well. his hair is dirty because he hasn't washed it today. his outfit is lame. the lighting is bad rn. george's photo looked too good and he couldn't possibly compare.

especially combined with how they met when dream was in high school, the time in everyone's life when they feel the most self conscious about their looks. he'd shown his face to sapnap years ago already, when they were still little kids, so it wouldn't have felt the same. so you're in high school worrying about all kinds of shit in your life, including all the pimples on your face, and then this college guy with his shawn mendes looking ass pretty boy face shows himself to you, what would you do? that would be the moment to show yourself right back, that trust exercise between internet friends, but you'd feel woefully inadequate. what's the point in showing yourself when you don't look that great anyway?

then it just keeps going. even when there's sort of a reason to show yourself maybe, it's never a good time. you never look good enough. you get even closer with him and you see his face all the time, and it's starting to be strange that he hasn't seen yours, but that's exactly why the pressure gets even higher. you lash out about it sometimes and make excuses and try to say looks don't matter when you're actually the one that cares about them and he's the one that looks so good that he couldn't imagine what it's like for you. it's been so long and you've missed so many chances, why would now be the time? it would if you're in an airport about to meet him. that'd be the time. but that's scary too. so you make more excuses to delay that too and it never ends

[barry-j-blupjeans]

For the new prompts list, Taakitz with fluff 15 or other 18?

both both both!!! (prompt list here, tho no longer accepting D:!!)

15. "I think I love you."

18. "I might never get another chance to say this."

--

"Nervous?" Kravitz asked and Taako scoffed. They were walking along the edge of the mountain that lead to the performance area. It was dark and really, Taako should be sleeping. In fact, Kravitz had tried to convince him to go back to bed when he showed up at Kravitz's window earlier in the night. But, as he had learned over the past few months, there was no changing Taako's mind when he was set on something.

Taako was one of the most fascinating people Kravitz has ever known, and probably will ever know. He wasn't from this world, first of all. Kravitz would say he was an alien, except Taako looked like pretty much every other elf he knew. Well, he looked like Taako, and no one looked like Taako, except maybe Lup, but he certainly didn't look alien. He looked... handsome. Beautiful, ever. Wonderful.

And he was funny, gods he was so funny. And smart, even if he didn't admit it because it made him "look like a nerd". He was kind when you looked past the sharp wit and occasionally obtrusive humor. He was dedicated to his mission with a passion that was almost alarming, but Kravitz had a feeling that it just came with the territory. Kravitz would be passionate about stopping the apocalypse if it kept chasing him year after year.

"Taako doesn't do nervous," Taako said. And then, in a grumble, he added, "but I'm nervous for everyone else. It's hard not being as naturally talented as me."

"You're gonna be fine," Kravitz said, squeezing his hand. "So is everyone else."

"Lup won't even let me listen to her practicing," Taako said. "She's being weird. I mean, she's always weird, but you'd think finally kissing your boy after fifty fuckin' years would make you happy, not- not weird."

"They kissed?" Kravitz, who had become way too invested with Lup and Barry's romance despite knowing them for less than a year, said. He tried not to care, for Taako's sake. But being a musician only took up so much of his time, especially since his performance got accepted by the Light earlier this year.

"They should," Taako said. "When I like someone, I just kiss 'em. It's not that hard."

"Oh yeah?" Kravitz challenged. "Wanna back that up?"

Taako rolled his eyes, leaning in to kiss him.

Tomorrow was Taako's performance for the mountain. Performance was sort of a strong word, considering Taako's plan was to go onto the stage, drop his book off, and then walk off the stage. Still, once he got accepted- which Kravitz was certain he would- he would have no reason to stick around. And certainly, at the end of the year, he'd be gone.

When Taako pulled back, Kravitz cleared his throat, chest tight.

"I wanted to take a walk with you 'cus, I, uh-" Kravitz took a deep breath. "I might never get another chance to say this, but. Uhm. I think I love you."

The past few months, Kravitz had slowly been learning how to see Taako's emotions. He wasn't very expressive by himself, but there were little things- the ways his ears twitched, or if he broke eye contact or not. Now, Taako did break eye contact. He let out a little sigh, almost like he had been expecting this. Kravitz's chest was very tight now, anxiety gripping him tightly.

"I know," Taako said. And then, amazingly, unexpectedly, "I'm sorry."

"Why?" Kravitz asked. "I- I don't wanna make you uncomfortable, Taako, I should be the one who's sorry."

"I'm not- I'm not uncomfortable," Taako said, with a little laugh that said otherwise. "Kravitz, look, I- listen. I haven't been... completely honest with everything I've told you about the mission, okay? Well, I have, but I've left out a pretty big part."

"What d'you mean?" Kravitz asked.

"You're not..." Taako started and then stopped himself. He let go of Kravitz's hand, instead rubbing his thumb against the side of his pointer finger nervously. He did that a lot, Kravitz had learned. "You're not the first Kravitz I've met? That's weird to say out loud, uh-"

"I'm not- what?"

"You're like, the sixth or seventh one," Taako said. He rubbed his fingers together a little faster. "And you're not all the same, obviously! You've got- you've got different lives and stuff. But I always end up finding you and- re-falling in love. And it's kinda. Hard, sometimes."

Kravitz blinked. He took a deep breath. And then another. Taako was sort of grimacing at him, looking like he wasn't sure what to say next.

"You didn't tell me this because...?" Kravitz said, trying not to sound too pitiful.

"Didn't wanna upset you?" Taako tried.

"I'm kinda upset," Kravitz said. "For, uh. For many reasons that I've just now discovered. Why- why- if you didn't wanna tell me before, why now? Like, right after I said I love you-"

"Bad timing, yeah," Taako said, little out a breath with a little hiss. "I'm... it's weird, right? Going to all these different planar systems and trying to adapt to them and then eventually leaving again. My go-to strat has always just been, like, not to connect with anyone 'cus then it hurts less, y'know? But it's- it's really hard to not connect with you, Kravitz, and I- half of me hates it, but the other half is kinda just... loving your vibe. And stuff. But it feels bad to be like "oh yeah, love you too" right off the bat because then I'm lying to you and I don't wanna lie to you."

"Taako, I-" Kravitz took a deep breath, reaching back for Taako's hands again. Taako looked uncertain but complied, placing his hands in Kravitz's. "Your life is- it's a little less than insane, Taako, and if I think about it, it's not that surprising that there's more of- of me out there, I guess"

"Not exactly you," Taako put in. "But yeah."

"I just. I wanna think about this. And it doesn't change how I feel if you're wondering. But that's kinda a big thing to drop on me at- fuck, it's probably well past midnight now, isn't it?"

"Probably," Taako said, with a chuckle that still sounded a little too nervous. "I'm uh- I meant to tell you earlier. So that's my bad."

"Can you walk back to my apartment with me?" Kravitz asked, squeezing his hands again. "Not to stay over. Tonight, at least. I need to- to think. But I'll see you for your performance, okay?"

"Yeah," Taako said, staring a little sullenly at their intertwined hands. "Can't wait."

[bartholomewillustrated]

Hello there! Just wanted to say i'm in love with the way you draw Heisenberg, and I'm also really curious to know if you have a headcanon/backstory for Heisenberg as a trans male, how was his life when he was younger and when Miranda took him as a test subject, how he met the other lords and what was his initial relationships with them 🤔

Ohhh thank you!!!! It always makes me so happy to hear people love my Heisenberg!! I draw him very particularly and its good to know other people like it too 😊

Ooooooo yes!!! I do actually.. i don't talk about my headcanons or anything else much these days because that's not really my scene anymore within fandom spaces... (And also this is my art blog so I don't talk much in general lol)

Buuuut since you asked :>c

- I prescribe to the idea that Karl was given to Miranda when he was young; like Donna he was the child of one of the villages prominent families. He was the perfect candidate to become Eva's vessel, close to the right age, the "right gender", showed a strong affinity for Cadou in initial tests.. and so he was inducted into Miranda's Family

-After getting his Cadou he was put into Alcina's care at the castle (she did not have the girls yet, and he was far too young to get the factory)

(-sidenote headcanon that's only slightly related; I imagine Alcinia is somewhat the impetus for Karl's rebellion, when he was first inducted to the family she defended him and protected him from Miranda immediately taking him to become Eva. They were never like Best Buds but once it became clear that lady Dimitrescu stood with Miranda in the long run the hatred really started to boil, Karl felt deeply betrayed and so did Alcina in many ways, and the pairs relationship became strained and complcated)

-he was the last lord brought on after donna (Moreau was the first, then Alci) (i'll admit i haven't thought about his early relationship with them as much..)

- He realised he was trans fairly young as well, still a good few years under Miranda's control, but young none-the-less. Just a quiet, private revaltion after coming back to the castle one night (he used to break out a lot and just wander around the village, or seek out Urias and repair tractors and various machines, always came back Filthy) I imagine it was like.. a pressure building in him over time, just comments from Urias and Alcina, feelings about how he was expected to act and dress as a psuedo-member of house Dimitrescu and a Lord and the dam just kinda broke one night and he was like OH... /OHHHHH/

-It became a sort of quest of reclamation for him, taking back at least a bit of his autonomy, ruining Miranda's plan for him, and starting him down the path to his ultimate plans to eliminate miranda (honestly Karl being trans excites me the most because of what it kinda.. adds to his narrative in this way, I made a post about it on my main i'll link here)

-he came out to the Duke first, I like to imagine they're close (though the duke is close to everyone) and the duke is the one who provides his testosterone, either that or heis has some way to extract it from the bodies he makes his soldats out of lmao.. but probably the duke. (I have the cu t e s t conversation in my head about this.. perhaps some day i'll illustrate it)

-karl is an old family name

-he was still allowed to live in the castle after coming out, he left to reclaim the factory after he fell out with alcina over his first planned rebellion

-he did try to pull the other lords+Villagers into his cause at certain points but they all rejected him, which immediately soured his opinions of them all which only grew worse over time..

Aaaand I think that's about? It? At least for you g Karl... Honestly i have less Headcanons for everything as much as I like.. have thoughts about motivations and feelings and who they are etc etc..

I'm also not great at putting my thoughts into clever short phrases fjdjskfnf sorry this got so long???

[jaedreaminn]

‘Anti Bully Buddy’

Summary

You weren't someone who would take shit from others and a were naturally protective of the ones you loved, but the world just didn't work out in your favour and you always became the bad guy.

Enter Tall, Handsome new guy with too much free time and a goody two shoes complex who's forced to stick by you.

Huh, maybe the world was working in your favour this time...

Pairings: Kun x fem!reader

Theme: Highschool, Bullying, Comical, humour, fluff.

Characters: Kun, Winwin, Ningning, Ten, oc «mentioned» Jisung.

Word Count: 3.7k

It wasn't an uncommon phenomenon for you to find your wrists bruised and, yourself slightly wounded sitting outside the principal's office. There were three other kids sitting opposite you and they were all three years below.

The principal walked out, looked at you and sighed “Bullying these kids again y/n?”

Your head hung low as anger started to boil inside you and you clenched your fists that were on your lap.

“Sorry ma'am” you forced out through gritted teeth.

Here's the thing those three kids belonged to very influential parents in the school so no matter what you said you were always the bad guy. The bully. But you didn't mind it. That reputation helped keep a lot of unwanted people in your life away.

The three boys sat in front of you with smirks and bruises on their faces. You didn't mind the title of bully, but you didn't like when the three devil incarnates always got away with what they did because it was YOU who was deemed bully.

“And that to kids who are your juniors?” The principal scoffed “This is happening way to often, and I don't like it” she said sternly, but you couldn't bother it was the same every time. She'll scold you a bit more and then give you some sort of creative punishment she worked up, and then you go home.

“Well we'll sign you up for the anti bully program I guess” the principal looked at you and sighed while you looked at her, confused.

One of the demons sitting opposite you spoke up asking her your doubt “Anti bullying? Isn't it supposed to help the victim not the bully?”

The principal smiled slightly at the boy “It's a newer approach where we assign someone to keep an eye on the bully, so they don't cause trouble. We could protect one victim, but the bully will just bully someone else” the principle smiled, and you frowned. That means your privacy will be taken away. Not that you do anything secretive, but you just aren't that fond of people.

You groaned and the principal glared at you “We already have volunteers” the principal said sternly her glare still on you “I'll check through whose schedule matches yours the most and tomorrow you're getting your anti bully buddy” the principal said sternly “Or how I like to call it A.B.B” the principal said the last part turning to the three boys giving them a quick smile.

“I'll see you in my office first thing tomorrow y/n” the principal said to you while flashing you a rather strict looking smile. You gave a slight nod and left.

It might be surprising to many how you could take on three boys at once. It had to do with your dad. He was a great fighter and told you that if there ever was a day he couldn't protect you, you should know how to fight. And so you learned, you went for karate classes and learned hand-to-hand combat. But it wasn't something you took very seriously, but then your mom died giving birth and everything went downhill. Your dad wasn't the same anymore, but he had to push through to raise your baby brother, but he was mostly drunk and spiraling while your aunt swooped in and handled the baby, and you were left alone. You needed an escape from that, so you spent more time at your dojo practicing and practicing and using it as a way to let your anger out. Because you knew you would crumble too if your brain didn't focus on something. But slowly everything got better, and you were starting to function normally as a family again. Your dad could smile again. But things changed again and your dad met someone. She made him happy, so you approved of her, so they got married. But they forgot you and your baby brother. Don't get them wrong they were good to both of you providing you with everything you needed and were never harsh or mean but to them, it was as if you weren't part of the family. It was easy for them to forget you. The person who you loved the most forgot you and moved on. And so you did to. You moved on and learned to live with it. And did the best for your brother too. He was the last memory of your happy family with mom and dad. And well know your only family that actually felt like family.

You were so lost in your own thoughts that you didn't realise when you reached class and when it ended. But all you knew was that it was lunchtime now.

“So another fight I see” Ten, one of your closest friends said with a smirk. “They deserved it” you grunted as you sat down next to him.

“I don't doubt that” Ten hummed out and just then two trays were slammed down onto the table in between you and ten. “So another fight and what is your punishment this time?” Ningning who slammed your and Ten's tray of food asked as she grabbed her own tray from Winwin who was behind her and sat down next to you. Winwin took the last seat available on the small circular table, between Ten and Ningning.

“How is jisung?” Winwin asked concerned.

“I got there in time, but he was hurt so he's resting in the infirmary right now” you said grimly.

You the looked at Ningning “Ohhh my punishment might just be the worst one yet because there is going to be someone who will FOLLOW me wherever I go in school to make sure I'm not causing trouble.” she gave a small chuckle at your irritation.

“Not that bad your lonely ass will make one more new friend” Ten said cheekily with an awfully cheeky grin on his stupid face. You punched him lightly and he dramatically fell back and threw his hand over his head and gasped “You wound me y/n” you just rolled your eyes and smiled and then naturally your group fell into conversation.

After you returned home from school and once diner was done (it was just you and jisung for diner) you lay on bed smiling. The day wasn't that bad except for the incident in the morning. You then frowned remembering what was to happen tomorrow.

Tomorrow came in a blink of an eye, and you were now seated in the principal's office next to this...guy. He had blond hair that extended below his eyes, but his eyes weren't covered because his hair was neatly parted showing his dark chocolate brown eyes. He had given you a smile when you entered, and you also saw that he had dimples. The cutest dimples that you had ever seen. But in all fairness you hadn't seen that many dimples because you didn't know that many people- you've mainly just seen pictures of people with dimples. But still his were cuter than the pictures.

“So this is your A.B.B” the principal said pointing at the boy beside you and he gave a small smile, you noticed him slightly cringe at the name.

Your principal started to speak cheerily “His name is Kun! But then her cheer fades and she said darkly "If you attack him too you're getting expelled”

You turned towards Kun and forced a smile. Kun smiled at you, again. He genuinely smiled and his teeth might have actually sparkled by how bright the smile was.

“Now off to class you two have the same schedule except for one class at the end of the week” the principal said and got to the work that was on her desk as you and Kun left.

Your smile dropped, and you turned to Kun “Look” you started, and he looked at you expectantly “You don't have to take this seriously cus I'm not really a bully per se so just mind your own business, and I'll mind mine”

Kun frowned “That's not going to help you get away with it and plus it's my job to stick by you whether you like it or not. I cannot have you bully people. It's sad that you find the need to pick on people and I hope to help you stop”.

You narrowed your eyes “I don't pick on people. You don't even know me”.

Kun sighed “I was already filled in on how you bully the kids from a younger class by the principle. I know your probably going through those teenage angst phases and that's okay I'll help you through it” Kun said not noticing the change in mood and how you were about to snap. “And maybe that is because you don't get along with your brother but beating him and his friends up and sending him to the infirmary isn't goo-” “What would you know” you interrupted him in a low hiss.

“YOU” you yelled stabbing his chest with your finger “DON'T KNOW 𝑨𝑵𝒀𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑵𝑮” you yelled emphasizing the anything as you continued stabbing him in his chest with your finger and then stormed off to your first class.

Kun stood there dumbfounded for a second but then immediately snapped out of his dazed state and realized that you had already left and began to run after you to your shared first class.

The entire day consisted of kun following you around and trying to start conversation with you and you trying to ditch him and ignoring him.

Lunch came and he followed you then too. You turned to him annoyed, but he smiled “Aren't you going to have lunch?” You asked clearly mad “Of course I'm going to have lunch” he said with his seemingly constant smile but didn't move.

“So why are you still here?”

“Like it or not” he said in a sing-song tone “I'm going to be having lunch with you”

“Ugh” you rolled your eyes and stomped towards the cafeteria. You soon saw Ten and Ningning already at the table conversing with each other.

You approached the table with Kun on your tail and Ningning and Ten looked at you confused but only for a few short seconds, soon Ten's eyes lit up knowingly “Oh A.B.B!” Ten exclaimed pointing at Kun who just awkwardly smiled.

“You can call me Kun" Kun smiled.

“But I like A.B.B.” Ten frowned.

“And I prefer Kun” Kun said a bit sternly.

“Kun works too I guess” Ten sighed.

You rolled your eyes at the exchange and sat down. A tray of food was already placed on the table for you and winwin, but you couldn't see your Jisungs tray.

“Where's…”

“Oh ji took his tray and is sitting with his friends in the garden” Ningning said noticing you look for him.

“Kun if I knew you'd be joining us we would have got a tray for you too” Ningning smiled at him apologetically.

“Oh it's alright I'll get my own tray and sorry for just imposing in on you guys but I have to follow y/n around.” he apologized and left to get his tray.

Ningning smiled “He's sweet”

“Not when he's following you around 24/7” you groaned and Ten snickered. Just then Winwin arrived and sat down.

“What misery of y/n's are we laughing at today” Winwin asked, and you glared at him. Ningning just smiled but Ten spoke “oh her A.B.B is here and is going to be following her around throughout the day” Ten snickered.

“Ohh that's nice less trouble for our tiny bully” Winwin said patting your head, and you sneered at him.

“I'm not that short, and I can take you so don't test me”

Winwins eyes widened at the very real threat for a second before he flashed one of his adorable smiles, and you could no longer be mad at him. That's the thing. Everyone loved Winwin. And that's why the brat got away with everything he did.

“Sicheng?” someone called from behind you and everyone turned to see Kun standing there with his tray shocked.

“Kun ge?” Winwin asked his eyes scrunching in confusion before the widened, and he was smiling again.

“Kun ge! What are you doing here” Winwin said immediately getting up and hugging Kun.

“I just transferred to this school three days ago” Kun said one hand wrapped around Winwin and the other holding his tray.

“That's why I haven't seen you before” Ningning muttered under her breath but you and Ten heard it too.

“Oh, and I'm y/n's anti bully buddy to so” Kin said laughing nervously.

“Wait really” Winwin jumped up in happiness and turned towards you “Kun ge was from my old school, and he helped me a lot there” Winwin said beaming at your group. Winwinw was the latest addition to your friend group around two years ago.

Ten had made friends with him first and you and Ningning easily grew fond of him too.

“Yes sicheng and I were really close-”

“Sicheng? Who's that?” Ten asked and you, Winwin and Ningning gave him a deadpanned look.

“Umm Ten.. Winwin's real name?” Ningning said and Ten's jaw dropped and Winwin scoffed in disbelief and threw Ningning's banana at him earning a smal protest from her and a whine from Ten who was hit in the face.

“As Kun ge was saying we were close, but I lost contact when I changed my phone number.” Winwin changed the subject still glaring at Ten while taking a seat, Kun sat next to him. And soon enough your group fell into easy conversation with Kun.

You even decided to finally talk to him and Kun stopped to smile at you in shock, but continued the conversation immediately.

For the first time that day Kun was not unbearable. He was actually really cool guy and talking to him was so easy. You two then talked about everything and anything and suddenly you didn't hate him any more, couldn't hate him any more. You had a class after lunch and then a free period where you continued to talk. You even decided to take him to your favourite spot in the school: the garden.

“Y/n” he suddenly called out and you just hummed in response while continuing walking towards the garden.

“I-” he stared “I had my assumptions about you but their not true and your actually really nice and have friends who are a good influence for you too” Kun said but stopped. You stopped walking and looked at Kun, he wanted to ask you something but was waiting for your permission “go on” you said as you resumed walking.

“How come you're categorized as a bully by the principal and are always in trouble” he finally asked after a long pause.

“Because she doesn't know the truth” you sighed and muttered softly.

“What?” Kun asked not having heard you properly you were going to tell him when you heard a small bang coming from one of the inner school corridors.

You and Kun looked at each other wide-eyed and both ran towards the sound. What you saw made your blood boil.

In front of you were the three boys that you beat up barely two days ago and on the floor agains the lockers was Jisung clutching his stomach. “Yah!” You screamed and that seemed to get their attention.

Kun who was looking at the scene unfolding wide-eyed had now come to his sense but Instead of his usually gental and calm eyes his eyes were in fierce glaring slits.

“Didn't I just teach you three a lesson yesterday” you snarled.

“Yes, and now we're teaching him a lesson. He was being pathetic and showing off in class” one of the three morons you were going to beat up spoke.

You began to charge in their direction only to be held back by a firm grip on your hand.

Kun shook his head, but you didn't care they deserved it, and you shoves his hands off you but he had other plans holding onto you tighter than before.

“Wait” he said struggling to hold you back but failing as you escaped out of his grip again, not that that was really hard to do with your training and skill, but you still waited, impatience clear on your face.

“Let me handle it” Kun said and you thought for a second about it. If anything went wrong you could still take all three of them, so you stood aside your guard up. In all honesty you wouldn't mind a different way to deal with those devils.

“So it's because he” Kun pointed at your brothers figure on the floor “is showing off? How?”

“He's getting all the answers right but refusing to help us.” One of them complained.

“Stuck up. That's what he is” the other added.

“And your solution was...?” Kun asked raising an eyebrow.

“Knock some sense into him” the third one smirked.

“So physically knock some sense into him? As in attack him... physically?” Kun asked the boys, and you were starting to get frustrated you were about to take a step ahead, but Kun held his hand out in front of you stopping you.

“Yes. You got a problem with that ha? What are you gonna do about it beat us up to?” They laughed.

“Oh yes I got a problem, but I won't beat you up. Instead,” Kun pulled his phone that out of his pocket and that's when you realised that he had been recording everything. You didn't know when he started recording or when he carefully placed the phone in his pocket with the back camera facing the boys. All you knew is that this time you got them. You couldn't before because of your school's crapy camera placement a.k.a. it being placed in only a few corridors that were close to important rooms where things could be stolen from and even those cameras were ancient.

“Instead I'll show this to the principle. And life will get easier” Kun said with a smirk on his face. It was kinda attractive but now was not the time to think about it.

Before you could register what was happening one of the boys lurched forward and tried to grab the phone but Kun simply stepped aside, and he went tripping ahead. The other two soon followed, but you had enough time to react and block them.

“So that's what..." Kun muttered still holding his phone in his hand watching you block but not attack the three. Suddenly it made sense to him, after all those conversations he realised you were very close to your brother, and he knew these three boys were also slightly influential in school. Good thing he was more influential than them Kun smirked to himself and made a run for it. He ran towards the principal's office and showed her everything.

What happened next, happened really quickly, the boys and their parents being called, acknowledgement of their bullying and your innocence, because you still used voilence, you were give a lighter and fairer punishment. All three of the boys, to their dismay had an A.B.B now, and you couldn't be happier. Oh and they also got suspended.

“Thank you” you said to Kun, and he smiled.

“Was glad I could help” his gaze then shifted to the floor “I guess I don't need to follow you any more” he said with a soft but dry chuckle.

“Yea…” you trailed off “but you could still join us?” You asked hopefully and Kun's eyes seemed to light up. “I'd like that” he smiled.

“Oh and you have to let me thank you properly” you beamed at Kun.

“You really don't need to”

“But I want to! So tell me how?”

Kun hummed in thought “Give me sometime to think about it, and I'll tell you later” he smiled and patted your head as both of you continued to make your way to class.

Time passed and things got better. You and Kun got closer than ever. You always hung out with him, either in a group or one on one. Furthermore, you found it easy and relaxing to be in his presence.

Maybe along the way you started liking his presence way more than you used to and felt for him in a more than Platonic way. But you kept it in- you aren't going to mistake his kindness for anything else.

One day when the both of you were walking to your house after you friend group parted ways after spending the entire morning and lunch together, with ice cream cones in each of your hands you remembered and asked “I never did get to repay you for how you helped tell me how can I return your favour”

“You know you don't really have to?” Kun smiled at you and immediately you felt your face go warm.

“But you know I want to”

Kun stopped in his tracks and pretend to think, you rolled your eyes at his acting but smiled nonetheless.

He then smiled and bent down leaning in, he was so close that you could see every detail on his face, even the little scar on the right side of his face “How about you take me out?” your breath hitched.

If your face felt warm earlier it was hot now. “O-out? Where do you want to go?” You bit your lip nervously as you kept reciting to your self in your head 'it isn't what you think it is. It isn't what you think it is.'

“I don't know depends on you really” Kun shrugged and then smiled again (it was as if he was trying to kill you with the number of time he gave that smile that caused you to stop breathing) “Which are your favourite dating hotspots?” and whatever defence you built up against him came crumbling down, and your jaw dropped, and you just stood there staring at him.

For a long while- like really long while because now his features fell “I mean y-you don't have to go on a date with me if you don't want to you know...” He trailed off taking a step away.

“YES! YES I'D LOVE TO GO OUT WITH YOU” you yelled and then your eyes widened, and you settled down into a more relaxed position and cleared your throat “yea sure I don't mind” you said making your voice lower and puting on a facade that Kun saw right through (obviously) because he was smiling, and you couldn't help it you smiled too.

“So Saturday's at four?” Kun asked smile still visible, but he was really nervous and you didn't need to know that.

“Yes” you said giving him a big smile.

A/n: To the people that made it to the end....I'm sorry you read that. This is my least favorite fic among all my stuff and I honestly just posted it because I wrote this for a friend who I care for too much to have her idea hidden in my drafts forever. Well more of a demon child but yea she specifically asked for this and my conscience can't keep this hidden.

[wreckofawriter]

Jelly Slugs

Pairing: Harry Potter x reader

Word Count: 2,278

Warnings: Swearing, a little angsty, still plenty of fluff

Song to Set the Vibe: broken ~ lovelytheband

Request: @mcluuvin666 hi could i request a harry potterxreader in which the reader & harry always seem to find each other in the hospital wing at the end of each year because of harry’s adventures & somehow she always ends up hurt in a funny/ironic way even though it wasn’t her intention to get caught in their messes if that makes sense? either way harry & the reader get really close throughout years of ending up in the hospital wing w the reader being frustrated w the trio bc they’re the “reason” why she’s hurt and she’s just kinda like “you lot are going to be the death of me” but harry and reader end up going out anyway. lots of fluff and maybe angst if you can? thank you so much!!

A/n: Once agian so sorry this took so long! It may not be completely edited, excuse typos, I wrote litteratly all of it tonight. I'm trying to burn through my requets, if u sent one I got it I'm just waiting to get to it

    At eleven years old you had already had far too many near-death experiences, for you that meant one. You hadn’t meant to do anything at all, well except grab some snacks from the kitchen after hours, but it wasn’t anything you hadn’t done before. On your way back your ears had picked up a sweet symphony and you had grown curious. 

Turning a few unfamiliar corners you found the room, its heavy door ajar. You pushed it all the way open, a pastry still stuffed in your mouth preventing you from screaming. A large three-headed beast lay in front of you snoring loudly. Before you could turn and run your eyes found a small wooden trap door at its feet. The phrase your mother often scolded you with echoed in your head, Curiosity killed the cat. You about turned on your heel but then the ending of the saying learned from an equally mischievous classmate came to you, But satisfaction brought it back. 

You dropped the food in your hands and walked hesitantly towards the large dog. You then quietly opened the door, cringing as its hinges squeaked and peered inside being met with complete darkness. You were going to close the door retrieve your treats then head back to your dorm but as you turned you met a pair of brilliantly green eyes and you let out a yelp before stumbling backward and plunging into the hole with a scream. You were soon followed by three of your classmates almost as confused as you were. 

You ended up getting your arm broken by a giant chess piece on your way to retrieve something you didn’t fully understand and what you believed to be a curse began. 

You sat up in a cold sweat the image of a white stone queen drawing her sword waking you with a start. You rubbed your eyes only to find your left arm in a sling and aching a bit.

“Oh, good you’re awake.”

You turned to your right to see a little boy in round glasses smiling at you. “What happened last night?” you asked eyes wide.

“It’s a long story, but I suppose we have time.” He shrugged, “Jelly slug?” he offered holding out a colorfully wrapped package. 

“Yes please.”

Second year began as normal as it should have but it was soon strange and dangerous, pearlized classmates and strict rules making the school feel less and less like a home. Of course, your luck being about as bad as it got, you where the last victim of the basilisk. 

You had been polishing trophies to serve detention which you got for supposedly bad-mouthing Snape although it wasn’t your fault Draco was a filthy snitch. You then saw a large pair of yellow eyes in the shining metal and everything went dark.

You woke up four days later body aching eyes feeling extremely dry as you blinked vigorously. You had a strange sense of deja vu as the hospital wing soon came into view. Head once again thumping as you tried to recall your memories. 

“Oh right, you're here.”

You turned your head to the right to see a wide smile, green eyes hidden behind round glasses as cuts riddled the boy’s face. 

“Merlin Harry, what happened to you?” You gasped taking in his battered form. 

He shrugged, “I fought Voldemort.”

You cringed at the name but said nothing of it to him, “Again?” 

He laughed, “Yeah, this time it hurt more though.” 

“I’m glad you’re okay.” You grinned at him.

His cheeks reddened a bit, “Yeah, I’m glad you’re okay too.” 

You fell into an uncomfortable silence before Harry reached to his bedside table and offered you a tissue-wrapped box, “Jelly Slug?” 

You nodded taking it from him

Third-year had been downright dreadful for you. You were finally a teenager which basically meant everything that had been easy and quick now seemed to take hours and far too much thought. Every little thing you did you were sure would be scrutinized, it didn’t help when a close friend of yours spread a nasty rumor about you and you found yourself skipping classes and opting to stay in bed. A serial killer being on the loose certainly didn’t help. 

The only sort of decent thing that happened was your friendship with Harry, after two times of healing in the hospital wing together you decided to be at least acquaintances. You held study sessions with the boy and occasionally his two best friends although all they did was bicker.  

You also happened to be outside reading when a rat lept on you and dove down your shirt leading to you being dragged into a tree by a dog who turned out to be a serial killer who turned out to be Harry’s godfather. But to be honest you didn’t really care.

You were absolutely livid, your leg was torn apart and for the third time in a row you had somehow been shoved into an adventure you most certainly didn’t want to take part in and you were bleeding heavily because of it. 

Oh yes, how could you forget? You were also almost killed by your professor, who had turned into a werewolf just in time to almost kill you again. 

When you woke up in the hospital wing with the golden trio surrounding you, you weren’t so pleasant.

A string of foul curse words, pointing fingers and yelling was shot at the three teens who apologized profusely insisting they did not mean to get you caught up in their business. 

You eventually calmed down and found out it wasn’t all that bad considering you got to see the suddenly very attractive dark-haired boy who made a point to spend all of his free time in the hospital wing with you as your leg healed. You shared a large amount of jelly slugs as you read muggle books and did your best to stay on top of studies.

Fourth year was much better than the last. You and Harry spent more and more time together and you felt a large crush on the boy who lived growing. Hermione knew about it instantly and Ron seemed adamant to tease both of you just for the joy of watching your faces flush. But good things never lasted.

You had a heart attack when Harry’s name came out of the goblet and found yourself taking his side in a sudden war between him and Ron. The bitch of a journalist Rita Skita also plastered you and Harry’s face all over the daily prophet when she caught you hugging him before his first task. You went with Harry to the ball although to both of your disappointment only as friends. And you ended up comforting Hermione in the hallway anyway. 

You also were almost drowned by your sorry excuse for teachers in the second task. Never one to back down from a fight you yelled directly at Dumbledor and Karkaroff saying how if your name wasn’t pulled out of that idiotic goblet than you shouldn’t have to almost die for the even more idiotic tournament. Of course, you did this with a very colorful vocabulary that landed you three weeks of detention. 

When Harry pulled Cedric from the maze you had cheered clapping along with the band until suddenly you heard the boy wail like a wounded animal. You raced down to meet him and helped pull him off of the elder boy’s body.

He was shaking the entire time and when you finally managed to drag him away he buried his head into your neck and sobbed. 

Harry was then dragged away by Mad-Eye and you were quick to follow, bursting in on the two just as Moody no longer became Moody. 

“Harry!” You yelled diving at the quickly transforming man who was holding him at wand point. 

Your body suddenly erupted in such harsh pain you thought you might throw up. 

“Y/n!” Harry’s yells fell on deaf ears as the unforgivable curse took all of your attention. 

By the time Harry was able to disarm the man, you had passed out from the pain. 

You woke up in the hospital wing three days later a disheveled Harry seated in a chair next to you his arms folded on your bed his head resting on them. 

When you tapped his shoulder lightly he jolted awake immediately engulfing you in his embrace sobbing out apologies as you pushed yourself closer into his chest. 

“I’m so so sorry y/n, I never meant for you to be caught up in any of this.” He choked out pulling away from you and cupping your face in his hands. 

“It’s okay Harry, I’m okay.” You spoke smiling weakly feeling extremely exhausted. 

“But he used an unforgivable cu-” 

“I don’t care, I’m just happy you’re okay.” You interrupted leaning into the soft circles his thumb was drawing on your cheek.

Harry’s eyes filled with an unidentifiable emotion and suddenly his lips were on your own. 

The second they connected he backed away blushing so heavily you were sure he was hot to the touch.

“I’m so sorry y/n, I don’t know what I was thinking and I-”

You only shook your head and wrapped your hands around his neck bringing his lips back to yours. His hands ended up on either side of you as you leaned back down on the bed bringing him with you. He hovered over you, your tongue slipping into his mouth as you played with the ends of his hair. He tasted overly sugary with a hint of fruit, just like a jelly slug.

You were interrupted by a cough followed by a low chuckle and Harry immediately pulled away from you and you turned to see not only your headmaster but Professor McGonagal and Madame Pomfrey all staring at you. 

Your eyes went wide and you felt so hot you thought you might catch the sheets on fire. You stole a glance at Harry who had paled dramatically, looking sick. 

“I’m glad you’re feeling better y/n.” Dumbledore chortled. 

You hissed in at the pain that shot through your ankle. Your head had also begun to pound causing you to squeeze your eyes shut and attempt to relieve the pressure by pressing onto your temples. Fuck Umbridge. You hopped that bitch was dead, as your eyes began to adjust to the sudden brightness of your surroundings you saw an all to a familiar sight. The hospital wing had become your home away from home and now in fifth year you, it made sense you ended up there once again. 

When your psychotic headmaster dragged you, your boyfriend and your two best friends out to the forbidden forest as she was attacked by a giant she managed to hit you with some sort of spell which effectively left you in your current state. Harry who was seated beside you wrapped his arms around your waist and placed a kiss on your neck.

“You okay?” He asked he seemed stressed, then again when wasn’t he?

“I’m fine.” You lied with a smile pushing his glasses back up his nose. 

“I think you should stay here y/n/n, I can’t have you getting hurt.”  He frowned. You then took notice of the group of teenagers was behind him. They were clearly about to leave. 

“I think history has proven that kind of unavoidable at this point.” You sighed standing up and drinking whatever was on your nightstand, it turned out to be a pain medicine that tasted the equivalent of dragon piss. 

“Y/n...” Harry spoke hesitantly.

You turned to look at your boyfriend, your face set in stone. “If you don’t take me with you I will find another way to that building.” 

Harry sighed biting down on his lip, “Fine. Alright, guys, let’s go.”

Your lips twitched into a smile just as you were about to leave the room you noticed a small half-empty bag on the table next to your bed, you stuffed it into your pocket and ran after the group you had fallen behind. 

You sat silently eyelids feeling so heavy you thought they might close at any moment. Your entire body ached, your headache coming back stronger than ever, but you didn't let onto your pain. 

Harry had his head buried into your stomach as you combed through his messy hair, his sobs were the only sound in the massive black room. Sand was scattered around you as you clung to your boyfriend your back up against a black glass wall as you stared blankly ahead of you. Dumbledore stood a few feet away, seeming almost as lost as you were. Part of you hated him for putting Harry through everything he had just been through, but you knew it wasn’t his fault. 

Harry adjusted himself so his head was buried into the crook of your neck, his arms wrapped around your waist. The movement caused something in your pocket to crinkle, catching your attention. 

You reached into your robe and removed a half-empty bag of candy. You smiled in spite of yourself. 

You tapped Harry on the shoulder whispering his name. He looked up at you his eyes rimmed in red, his face blotchy, the sight made your heart throb.

“Jelly Slug?” You asked your voice cracking.

The boy let out a mix between a laugh and a sob before lightly placing his lips onto your own. He tastes salty and bitter, like tears and blood. You found yourself wishing you were elven again when everything was simple, wishing that Harry still tasted like jelly slugs. 

Taglist:

(Realizing I forgot this last fic I posted, my bad)

@accio-rogers

@roslea

@k3nz-doodl3

@theseuscmander

Masterlist

[thejoshuaglenn-blog]

You're a Good Boy, Charlie Brown

The key purpose of a Tumblr blog here is really a brain dump: logging thoughts, feelings, narrative and such is easier in long form than via a brief Facebook post that generates half a dozen "oh no, what happened" comments. As I'm writing this, most of it seems like bullet points and organized timelines. If you're looking for a TL;DR or current state of thoughts, it's the last section titled The Day After, and the Day After That.

A few days ago, Niko and I said goodbye to our first dog, Charlie Brown.

I'm not keen to chat about it a lot. There's more to process than I have time to type; most of it centers around being fair to myself and to Niko, taking the time to appreciate his life without beating ourselves up, and avoiding the overwhelming mire that grief can become.

Joining the Family

CB was a rescue, a hapless victim of the 2016 Louisiana floods and a happy-go-lucky participant in a "dog for a day" event hosted by a local shelter. I fully expected to rent him out for a day, give him a few great experiences, and return him. For myriad reasons, we never did bring him back to Pet Rescue by Judy, and he's been with us ever since.

At adoption, he was estimated to be around 4-8 years old. With a kicked-in shoulder that offset his collarbone and ribcage, some assorted dental issues, and other little signs of damage (cigarette burns, what the heck is wrong with people), it was tough to really gauge his age. That means he left this world at the ripe old age of something like 9-13, which isn't terrible considering all he'd been through.

Charlie Brown was the iconic good boy. He seldom barked, he never licked or jumped, and just wanted to be in the same room as his favorite people. He had a few toys that he cherished, never ripping them up, just carrying them with him from room to room and whining a bit, unsure of where he could store them for safekeeping. Apart from some separation anxiety issues and an occasional urge to bolt out the door and book it as far as he could, CB was by all accounts an easy first dog: more like a low-effort cat than anything else.

Slowly Falling Apart

Over time, the health issues increased. Intermittent but predictably regular upset tummy. Bad gums, bad teeth. Random gooey skin lesion. Eye ulcers. Since October, we've been averaging 2-3 unplanned vet visits a month — many incurring some hefty bills. We'd take out another credit card, find another financing plan, but it adds up. So does the emotional toil on the family; so does the anxiety toll on the dog.

You start to think about quality of life for the dog, you know? He'd had a few teeth removed to sew up his gums after they kinda detached and fell apart from his jawbone — so he couldn't chew anything hard. Couldn't even chew a tennis ball, which was the only toy he took interest in anymore. Couldn't have any fun treats like peanut butter or other soft chews, as his tummy would have bad flare-ups that usually ended up with him attached to an IV bag. After finally settling in and learning to play well with Atlas, Charlie Brown started to get pretty irritable whenever Atlas got frisky.

He still loved running around outdoors, and was in otherwise great health.

I can't tell you how guilty that makes me feel, even now.

Moving to Waltham

Before we left Orlando, there were so many crisis moments in emergency vet offices where Niko and I talked about how long he could ride this roller coaster. CB obviously was not a fan of vet visits: loved the staff, but was notably anxious and panicky when separated from us, and he had grown very loathe to the process of poking, prodding, and whatnot.

Shortly after moving to Waltham (he was a champ in the U-Haul), Charlie Brown had a severe colitis flare-up. He was losing so much fluid and was growing very lethargic over the day. Vets are hard to get into these days: with the sweep of "pandemic puppy" adoptions, the vet industry as a whole is saturated with demand, and practices are responding as best they can. There were just no emergency clinics available to us within 20 miles, except one that noted "we have no availability, but you can come and wait, and we might be able to see you in 4 or 5 hours." So we did.

It was a very late night. Charlie Brown came home with us with another round of the same antibiotics he'd been taking almost regularly since December for his assorted ailments, and some probiotics. The next day, CB seemed a bit better and brighter, and Niko and I went into the city for part of the day. We came home to find he'd had an accident, but it was just... blood. So so much. And he looked so in pain, so ashamed, so guilty, so anxious.

So we went back to the vet ER. It was another very late night. I didn't know how many of these late nights we could afford; neither of us knew how many of these late nights it was fair to expect Charlie Brown to endure.

Do you plan on letting a pet go after an extended crisis visit? Do you plan on letting a pet go in a time of relative peace?

Camping Analogy, and a Best Last Day

When you're off on a long hike, and you see daylight start to fade as the sun begins to set, you begin to think about finding a good place to set up camp for the night. It's abysmal to do this after the sun has already gone down: where you could have had preparation and structure, you have chaos by flashlight.

A dog's life is in your hands. You're his whole world: all food, adventure, pampering, challenge, treatment, and care come from you. More than anything, we wanted Charlie Brown to have a peaceful, restful life. Now that we started thinking about it, we wanted to be able to give him a peaceful, restful passing as well: not as the climax of another overnight crisis with injections and yelps and beeps and cowering and anxiety and fear, but in the still quiet of familiar sounds and smells.

His very last day was a great one. Fresh Pond in Cambridge: a massive stroll around a colossal lake with an absurd bounty of new smells, kind people, happy dogs, and a brisk New England breeze. He got to swim in a little side pond — that boy lived for jumping into random lakes. He ran around the broad field that is Kingsley Bowl, chasing a thrown ball the very very farthest his sad pop could throw it — and he brought it back. We bought him a steak. We told him how much he brought to our lives.

And then we waited.

Lap of Love is a sort of home delivery service of dignified passing for pets. There's more to say on that hour than I care to pen, but throughout the procedure, we never left him. Charlie Brown passed enveloped in our arms and laps and sobs and hugs.

The Day After, and the Day After That

The rest is just thoughts. Your head starts to feel like a coffee shop where your grief comes in, sits at a table with you, and unloads. You nod, listen, and wish them well. I hope I can keep processing this way — I find it helpful, and less overwhelming.

I wish he had been able to play with his tennis ball more. Since his jaw surgery — even out on Kingsley Bowl, nearly a month and a half after he should have been fully healed — any kind of chewing would cause renewed bleeding and pain.

I wish we had hugged him more. But truth be told, he didn't like hugs. They made him uncomfortable. So we gave him a hand to lay his head on, or a knee for him to pop his head upon, as often as he liked.

There were so many times I felt inconvenienced by owning a dog at all. They weren't the majority, but... now each remembered time feels like a splinter of selfishness.

I miss how familiar the back of his neck felt under my hand, just behind the ears, where the waves of fur meet and crash and make a long cowlick of foof and fluff.

His happy smile and his stressed smile were very similar, but you could still tell which was which.

I loved being there for him in thunderstorms.

When you think about it, we sort of were hospice care for him. We weren't his original owners; we just wanted the rest of his life to be painless and fulfilling. He had so many trust issues when he first came to us. And in the end, he loved anyone he met.

I miss feeling around with my feet to make sure I don't step on him on my way to bed. I miss setting my feet on the floor as I wake, stooping down, and giving his head a good squishy rub.

He never did get to see Boston snow. I mean... thousands of dogs never get to see snow. But I was really looking forward to sharing that experience with him.

I wanted so badly to bring him to a point of health, and then say goodbye when he was feeling well. Seeing him have his Best Last Day, part of me whispered "murderer" with cold accuracy, and I have a hard time shaking it. He was so happy — but between jaw bleeding after playing with a tennis ball, seeing him scratch his eyes that were starting to ache with ulcers again... I know the unbridled happiness came with the reality of his declining health.

Atlas was the best thing that ever happened to that boy. I know Charlie Brown was at least a little disgruntled that his easy-going day-to-day had been interrupted by a chompy puppy, but Atlas brought out the young pup in CB: ripping palm fronds to shreds, playing tug, playing tag, meeting new dogs with confidence and assurance.

I used to get so mad at my mother-in-law for feeding Charlie Brown cinnamon donuts. I wish I'd given him more. Heck, I wish I'd given him more peanut butter. I'm frankly surprised he hadn't died of peanut butter overdose years ago.

Where Charlie's health had limits, we kept going with Atlas. That might mean taking Atlas out to play with a ball or a tug toy, because CB couldn't. It breaks my heart now to think of Charlie at the glass door just watching it happen, all because he physically couldn't play the same. I know he didn't understand that.

We took him out to Park Ave maybe once or twice. I wish it had been more. Truth be told, it was the same as the dog park, though: he was kind of a loner. Loads of people or dogs made him anxious. So while I might idealize the past and wish he had sat at our legs for lunch after lunch at an outdoor thoroughfare, ... I think he would have been miserable. I think he would have rather just curled up at the base of the couch and dozed while we watched a show.

He was so trusting. I could just drag him onto his back and onto my lap for cuddles and a good tummy rub. No complaints.

He looked so gaunt these past few months. I keep looking at earlier photos, and I really didn't realize just how grizzly and drawn he had become lately.

I miss seeing him randomly waiting for me outside the bathroom door — or curled up on the bath mat while I was in the shower, having sneakily nosed the door open and wanting my company while I was rinsing.

For his first few years with us, he was incredibly playful. I've been going through old videos — it's like going outside just blew his mind, and toys were either for cherishing daintily, or thrashing about and throwing to oneself and gnawing. He lost that after a time. He regained it a bit when Atlas joined the party. But it still faded. I'm sure that's inevitable, but it makes me sad to see the early vibrant puppy in those old recordings, and how different he had been in recent months.