#i'm just sad about it too lmao?

[kennyyomega]

on the real though if twitter dies i’ll probably lose contact with like 95% of the people i talk to and that uhhhh sucks

[ink--theory]

forbidden love type of beat

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

hot garbage 👇

[markantonys]

While I still don't think the show has done enough to show why the world despises and fears male channelers (since it really should've been embedded into the world building, so far we only know that the Aes Sedai hate and fear them) and it does kinda lessen the impact of the narrative that none of the EF5 had at least an initial gut reaction to Rand being able to channel. I do wonder how they're gonna handle that topic moving forward, cause it kinda has to be addressed now that Rand is actively channeling. I could see it being expanded more deeply as Rand's madness progresses/tie it into his arc.

the show has made it ABUNDANTLY clear that Male Channelers Are Considered Bad News By All. it IS embedded into the worldbuilding. was the king saying that logain's gone mad and trying to kill him not enough for you? was the people of tar valon jeering and throwing fruit at him not enough for you? was rand and mat saying "hey if i'm a male channeler please kill me" not enough for you? was rand's terror the second he realized selene saw him channel not enough for you? was selene's act of how a normal person would react to finding out her boyfriend can channel not enough for you? was his heartbroken yet unsurprised reaction to her rejection not enough for you? was the whole backstory of a male channeler causing the apocalypse not enough for you? do you think that show-onlys are completely incapable of putting all these pieces together along with aes sedai treatment of male channelers and coming to the conclusion that male channelers are probably not very popular with most people and it's going to be very tough for rand that he is one?

literally what else should they have done that would make sense within the very small world and very early story of the first 2 seasons/3 books that they didn't already do? shown emond's fielders sitting around the dinner table talking about how much they hate and fear male channelers when none of them has ever met one and thus it's not relevant to their lives? wasted time doing a whole sidequest for rand in s2 where his abilities are discovered by some Average Citizens and they react badly? shit all over show!mat's characterization and given him a negative reaction to rand in s2 that would not make sense for his current show headspace, just for the sake of furthering rand's randpain? i'm sick of the rand stans who act like rand is the only character who matters and mat's characterization should be sacrificed just so we can go "oh poor rand uwu even his own best friend is mean to him". portraying mat in 2x06 as the sort of person who bullies and kicks his best friend while he's down would've been beneficial because......? what is so wrong with the show making the ef5 feel like mutually loyal friends instead of "rand is the best and most loyal friend in the world but the rest are little shits who abandon him as soon as the going gets tough"? seeing as in the books, mat continues to be an extremely loyal friend to rand throughout the series but most readers are too stupid to see through his unreliable narration and realize he doesn't mean it when he says that rand channeling is like him eating babies, i'm not surprised the show decided to simplify things in order to convey the true heart of mat's character (loyal and caring friend to rand) in a more obvious manner.

and i guarantee you that no show-only is going "oh, it's only aes sedai who have a problem with male channelers, everyone else thinks they're cool". that's not happening. show-onlys are not stupid, and they understand that male channelers are considered bad news by all; or maybe they haven't thought much yet about how male channelers are viewed by the average public, but in future seasons once we see rand getting shit from the average public, they are not going to be surprised or confused or go "but i thought it was only aes sedai who had a problem with them and everyone else thinks they're cool?", they're going to go "oh, well we've seen how much aes sedai hate them, so it makes sense that everyone else does too". stop. think for 2 seconds about "have i actually seen a large number* of show-onlys misunderstanding X and/or do i think it's plausible that a large number of show-onlys would be likely to misunderstand X, or do show-onlys have enough context clues to figure out X for themselves or to be unsurprised when X is expanded on and made more explicit in future seasons and i'm working myself up into a state over a non-issue?"

*there are always going to be a handful of people incapable of critical thinking who willfully misunderstand what the show is showing us, just like there are readers like that with the books, hence unless a LARGE number of general-population show-onlys are misunderstanding X, as opposed to just 20 idiots on twitter, i do not consider it a failure by the show in portraying X.

[shalom-iamcominghome]

Is it too early for me to feel jewish rage because I'm still thinking about the rededication of a shul that two members of my shul are going to. I mentioned this in the tags of a previous post, but know why it's being rededicated to the jewish community? They had to sell the shul to the catholic church. That shul has existed for over a hundred years and a significant portion of its existence has been under ownership of the catholic church. And only now is that jewish community able to buy back their own shul. Maybe it hits harder now because I am in love with my shul, maybe it's because I know how hard it is to find a shul no matter how big the city is. Maybe I just think jewish things deserve to be with jews. Maybe I'm crazy!!

I'm just upset about it. And I know this is, like, 80% of jewish history, but it still makes me feel things.

[reverienco]

Have you thought of N getting his revenge on J for all the years he has been builled by her?

i don't think he ever would. N is a naturally very nice and forgiving person, specially so to a fault. i really don't think he holds/held a grudge against her or V for the way they've treated him prior to his meeting with uzi. the most negative we've gotten was his "J, you're sometimes kinda mean to me and I wish you weren't. Just some constructive criticism!" but even then, it was prompted by uzi and he did say "constructive criticism" lol

other than that, he has THANKED HER when she stepped on him, called him worthless and terrible and she'd kill him if company allowed it; when she LITERALLY almost kills him and never complained about her bullying in the manor. he stopped uzi from throwing (presumably) an insult towards eldritch J's appearance, was completely chill when she came back as a clone????

bottom line is, N doesn't seem like the type to hold grudges or plan revenge against anyone, even if they've actively hurt him for so long. he's always willing to give everyone even a little bit of a benefit of the doubt

[dazais-guardian-angel]

I'm finding it difficult to reconcile the fact that what I've always wanted and envisioned for Nikolai and his relationship with Fyodor based on fanworks and the very very little canon information we've had to go off of so far, will very likely be very different from what we actually get.

While I understand the appeal of Fyodor taking over Nikolai's body via his blood ability, and the inherent, romantic, ironic tragedy of that — for Nikolai, the person who yearned for freedom, to meet an end by having his soul eternally trapped in the body of the person he loved the most, while Fyodor lives on in his body, never truly knowing how much he was adored by him — I would just hate the idea of that happening now? It just feels far, far too soon for Nikolai to be dead, for his character to no longer have a role or a purpose; his mind and behavior is so utterly fascinating in all its bizarre contradictions, there's so much more to explore and discover with him, he's one of BSD's most complex characters, or at least he's set up to be, and I really hope Asagiri wouldn't throw him away this soon without doing anything more with him.

I never really thought that Nikolai would be the one to end Fyodor for good, way down the line (that can only ever be Dazai's job, to me, since he's his foil), but I always imagined he'd at least have some kind of role in attempting to kill him, since that's his ultimate wish. I imagined that it would be ugly, frenzied, unhinged, desperate, Nikolai finally being forced to acknowledge the horrible truth that's always been buried within his subconscious but he's never wanted to accept: that going against all human reason and killing someone he cares so deeply for will not, in fact, simply make those feelings go away, and will instead make them unable to ignore in his despair. The realization that he'll always be chained to human emotions, to love, no matter how much he thinks he can be free of them. And then, the ensuing breakdown from that. Yes, it's extremely fanficky lmao, but that kind of drama makes sense to me for him and them. It's interesting.

There was also the angst angle of Fyodor being immortal, and Nikolai's agenda perhaps stemming from wanting to save him from that, and being able to finally free him from it in the same way he himself wants to be freed. Killing being the ultimate expression of love, not too dissimilar to Mushitarou killing Yokomizo, both putting on an act of being hateful/vengeful/hostile towards the other in order to cope with the fact that deep down they can't bear the thought of them being gone.

But then we got Fyodor's "death" here, and Nikolai's reaction to it was so unbelievably underwhelming and calm that it made me question everything I thought I knew about Asagiri's writing skills him, and what the story is going for with him. And combined with this revelation now that Fyodor is (unsurprisingly!) immortal, but specifically in the way that he can be killed but supposedly resurrects endlessly (which I really like in of itself, don't get me wrong)... it makes me question what exactly Nikolai knows, or will know, and it somewhat destroys the potential angst we could get with them in the end, or at least drastically changes it.

If Nikolai already knows Fyodor can't be killed, that means we'll never get a moment where he tries to kill him and then has to face the fact that he did the deed and it didn't make him feel freed, and he instantly regrets it. It also means we'd never get a moment where he tries to kill him and then discovers he can't truly die, and the ensuing insanity that would occur from that. It also makes me even question the legitimacy of his reaction to Fyodor's "death" here... was it so damn apathetic and lukewarm because he already knows it wasn't permanent? I mean, I'd like an explanation for it feeling so ooc, it would make me feel better about that, but I can't deny that it would be disappointing to have yet another part of this arc that was just an act and not genuine feelings....

Now, that isn't to say that it's impossible to do anything interesting with Nikolai already knowing the truth. He could be wishing to try to attain free will through the illogical pursuit of an impossible task: in this case, killing Fyodor. There's a beautiful, tragic paradox in him wishing to attempt something to gain his freedom that he and we know is impossible, especially if subconsciously he takes solace in the fact that he'd be able to kill Fyodor without actually losing him for good. If Nikolai doesn't already know, assuming he's not dead he's likely going to find out the truth soon when he next sees Fyodor alive and kicking — I can't imagine a way he wouldn't find out. In that case, we wouldn't get the aforementioned scenario where he tries to kill him and discovers it's futile, which is the most juicy to me I won't lie, but I am still fascinated by the idea of how Nikolai will respond just seeing him suddenly alive again and having to process this after having just mourned him. It's interesting to imagine how he might respond to and treat Fyodor after at last knowing how it truly felt to lose him, and realizing how much he didn't want that, and then suddenly having him back. It might cause him to finally understand that his desire for freedom is unobtainable, and cause him to spiral, and fundamentally change their relationship going forward. An eventual tragic end for him such as Fyodor taking over his body would not feel out of place to me in that case, perhaps, but still not until we've had more time to see Nikolai reflect and see his possible change in perspectives.

I don't know, I'm just rambling at this point lmao. I know very well that so much of my expectations and desires for Nikolai and Fyolai are built up from fan content over the years just because there's been nothing else to work with, and that it's unfair to judge what Asagiri decides to do with him/them based on preconceived notions. Whatever he does could still be interesting in the end, even if it's not what I initially wanted or expected, and being open to being surprised is always a good thing. At the end of the day we still know barely anything about Nikolai, so it's not completely fair for me to judge something as ooc for a character we still know so little about.

But... it's because we know so little about him and have gotten so little of him, that at the very least, I'm gonna be really upset if he does die here from being possessed by Fyodor like people are worrying about. I really don't think he will, because I'm pretty confident the helicopter pilot is the one Fyodor swapped with/resurrected in the body of as per soup's theory, and again I'm not saying it wouldn't be fitting eventually... but I really don't want it to happen now. :/ I just think Nikolai still has so much potential as a character and so much more we need to see of him before his likely inevitable and tragic demise (however it happens), so whatever Asagiri decides to do with him I just really, really hope we don't lose him so prematurely; it would honestly be such a tremendous waste imo.

[grocerystoreanxiety]

have seen lots abt when you have had mental illness/trauma from a young age so that's all you know and I don't wanna take away from that at all, like that's actually fucking horrible

But also, the other side of when you have a "before". Like you fully know the person you used to be (and never will be again) and you know this is not you; you're a stranger to yourself now. And maybe you already had a clear picture how your life would play out at least in parts before the mat was pulled out from under you and now it's all wrong. Like you can hear your past self screaming about when/how/why the fuck did it all turn out like this. The grief of what could've been etc.

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

[amber-gimlet]

project moon sucks now and I really don't think there's anyway to pull up from that nosedive at this point but library of ruina will have an eternal deathgrip on me.

which is the big reason I'm doing my no commentary run on youtube, though its probably not the only one, I want to do my own. Both as a sense of closure but also so I have a resource I made myself that I can direct my friends to who can't play the game or don't want to acquire the game in the first place.

.... I maybe should post it to tumblr I guess? idk I feel like most of the people who follow me and are interested in library of ruina either played the game, will play the game, or are in the discords where I already posted the link to the playlist.

where was I going with this. oh right. angela. they could never make me hate her. clap for her right now.

god I wish pm hadn't turned out like this. we're probably not getting distortion detective continuation and even if we did it would still be tainted just like limbus is...

[nugatorysheep]

rebecca can't make pearl bi because that's erasure! wah!!!

Ah yes. The lesbians will suffer so horribly without Pearl. Surely there are no other feminine characters in this show with a cast primarily comprised of alien women that could have the potential to be attracted to each other

Oh wait. Garnet. The one who sang a musical number so proudly gay another fandom stole it and made a shitty rip off. The one who is so gay the two faggots she's made of can coexist within each other indefinitely. Y'know, the one who was so overtly and unapologetically gay with her gay wedding that it got the show ended early??

Anyway pearl x greg semi-canon send tweet

[caimitos]

saw a post about projecting your ethnicity onto a character and started missing vespa ilkay. so so bad

[palladium-poisoned]

tag game: make a poll of your favourite female characters (no limits - as many or as little as you want) and see which your followers like the most!

tagged by @dekarios

tag you're it! @primordialwhale @futureshieldmaiden @queenflorence @seedystreet @thepreciousthing @zheida

and anyone else who feels like it asldkjfgh

[perilegs]

being homesick and changing as a person so much the place you grew up in isn't your home anymore is such a core part of ati and upon further inspection i think i was projecting a little

[frobby]

Hey hey this is kinda random but yall do know how easy it is to get Japanese games(or Chinese or korean) on ur phone right? I saw a bunch of ppl talking about how they're sad they can't play haikyuu touch the dream cuz it's not global but like u totally can and it's super easy

Android: just download qooapp u just gotta look up qooapp and if u want download their app and boom jp games galore! Qooapp is what I use but the caveat is its not for ios

Apple: okay ur getting this info second hand so if someone has more than I do that would be very helpful. From what I've heard u just have to make a Japanese apple ID and I don't have an apple phone so I don't know how it works sorry!

Japanese IP bypass: some Japanese games check if you have a Japanese IP address which makes them harder to download however u can work around it with a VPN. I used tunnelbear when I downloaded magireco and it Def worked. All I did was change my location to Japan and then make a Japanese IP email acc and sign in to the googleplay store. Make sure to set the app to auto update tho so u don't have to deal with it later. Luckily it's only a few games you'll have to do do this for

In conclusion:downloading Asian games is very easy and the only issue is language and u could easily look up translations for story and mission and stuff though I wouldn't recommend story heavy or games where you feel like you would need to be able to read I know some people use like apps that translate in real time but idk how to do that lmao

[high-voltage-rat]

POV: you're a student at GEARS University and the weird 35-year-old who sat next to you in Mecha Piloting 101 and never took off their safety goggles is your neuroscience TA because it turns out she's a literal actual doctor.

As I mentioned in my art of her post-reset self, Ravyn is much more fleshed out as a character in Mechquest. So here's my lore-dump, which may serve as the preface to me posting the fic I'm writing of her (if I can work up the courage to do so, lmao).

As a fun little intro, some trivia:

Always introduces themself as "Ravyn, Ray if you prefer single syllables".

Wears their lab goggles and white coat as part of their piloting gear because they're paranoid about ocular open globe injuries and their coat is fire-resistant. Other medical professionals tease her for being like a med student who wears their first white coat everywhere.

Uses her energy blade for everything: lighting the way to the bathroom, opening packages, making toast, and cutting her hair over the garbage can any time it gets long enough to be in the way.

Lectures everyone who will listen on why acetaminophen and ibuprofen should be taken together for their synergistic mechanisms, the ideal nutrient intake to have energy throughout the day, and the neurochemical reasons why one should maintain good sleep hygiene.

Is also a hypocrite who doesn't eat or sleep right themself.

Considered joining Mystraven, but couldn't bear the jokes about Ravyn and Ravens that were sure to come, so joined Runehawk instead. Still hears bird jokes regularly from Starbuck anyway.

Loves to design new ways to inject mecha into combat. Really enjoys a "fastball special"-esque entry using the momentum of a dropship taking a tight turn to fling her at the enemy. Sys-Zero is the only one brave enough to do it, though.

(Thanks to @cyraen-ae for the character sheet template!!!)

Unlike most students of GEARS, Ravyn isn't a young teen full of fire when she enrolls. In fact, up until the Shadowscythe war, they'd never really piloted a mecha before. Born in Tibattleonia on Loreon, Ravyn discovered early on in their life that they were gifted with a natural affinity for psychic, specifically empathetic, magic. Able to feel the emotions of others, and even manipulate them to a degree, she naturally fell into the path of a doctor- using her abilities to soothe pain, ease fear, and even diagnose issues in the cases where patients found themselves unable to describe their ailments. In cases where anaesthesia wasn't an option, her abilities were highly valued- though using them always left her feeling quite drained.

She was a Neurocritical Care specialist serving with the Soluna Defence Force's Medical Corps, nearly through her fellowship with no thoughts of a career change- when the MASH unit she was stationed at suddenly found itself under constant fire from a threat they'd never seen before. The Shadowscythe hit them hard, the soldiers posted to protect them were going down, and for the first time, the doctors of the camp had to requisition a communal mech to allow them to chip in on defending their patients. Originally very reluctant to pilot, Ravyn was taught how to pilot by the head surgeon of their camp, Col. Henry, and quickly found that they were a natural prodigy- and a bit of an adrenaline junkie, to boot. Their quick thinking, impulsive but tactical, and highly adaptable nature meant that their piloting was full of decisive and strategic moves that made them a very effective pilot- and the precision of a doctor accustomed to neurological procedures is not to be underestimated.

Over the next few months, she began spending less and less time in the O.R., and more and more time at the helm of their Skuld mecha, affectionately nicknamed "the Monster M.A.S.H.". Her coworkers pushed for her to receive formal training at GEARS, believing that she could do a great deal of good if she honed her natural talent. She didn't want to leave her patients and colleagues, but eventually reluctantly agreed, and the camp chipped in to buy a new communal mecha, sending The Monster M.A.S.H. with her as a not-so-regulation parting gift when she left. In the spirit of that mecha, she tries to keep her oath of non-maleficence whenever possible, avoiding fights with non-Shadowscythe at every opportunity, and fighting to subdue and minimize harm when she can't.

As one might expect, this highly atypical background left them pretty alienated from the rest of their GEARS class- being a solid 12 years older than everyone else will do that to you. They ended up being closer to professors like Sys-Zero, external professionals like Helia, and grad students like Starbuck, Jaania, Casca, and Xaria- though they did also form an odd friendship with the Reliant crew (River, Sally, Dooder). As the war progressed, they grew closer with the crew as they ran missions together regularly, and with Sys-Zero, Warlic, Char, the house leaders, and Odessa as the people bearing the burden of leadership in the darkest times their world had ever seen.

The Shadowscythe take a lot from Ravyn- she witnesses the ruins of her hometown firsthand, has to fight twisted creatures in its crumbling rubble. She watches the mecha of friends crumple and burn under their fire. One day, one of her closest friends from the M.A.S.H. camp comes into Specific Hospital on a stretcher, and breaks down as he tells her that everyone else is gone. She sees the horror of the Shadowscythe virus, turning people she cares about into enemies. This all leaves her with significant PTSD, including night terrors. Despite it all, however, she fights hard to hold onto her sense of humour, to love warmly, and to keep hope alive in the hearts of those she protects.

That's something the reset can never change.