#i'm honestly still pretty feminine presenting overall but

[thethirdromana]

Yes femininity on men in The Woman In White is a whole thing.

Fosco “with all his look of unmistakable mental firmness and power, he is as nervously sensitive as the weakest of [women]. He starts at chance noises as inveterately as Laura herself”. Fosco’s got “effeminate tastes and amusements” and looks like “a fat St. Cecilia masquerading in male attire”.

Fairlie’s feminine traits are the most obvious. His hands are “delicate”, he is beardless and his feet “effeminately small” and clad in “little womanish bronze-leather slippers”. To Walter, Fairlie’s “frail, languidly-fretful, over-refined look” appears “unpleasantly delicate in its association with a man”. Pykett notes that most of these traits would be normally attractive in a woman and yet they are repulsive in a man. His overall appearance and delicacy is the trait he shares with Laura and Anne. He is prone like them to a mysterious illness about which everyone says that “it’s on the nerves”. His nervous state is directly linked to his lack of masculinity. Fairlie admits himself that he is “nothing but a bundle of nerves dressed up to look like a man”.

Yep - it's something I find really interesting about the Woman in White. It's a feminist novel, and often in unexpectedly sophisticated ways (showing how the problem doesn't come back to individual bad man, but the system as a whole) and unexpectedly insightful ones (in the 21st century you still get male writers who think you can snap the heels of stilettos and then run in them, but Wilkie Collins gets how restrictive Marian's clothing is).

But it's also a novel that hates femininity. It hates it above all in men (as you've shown, anon) but it's not exactly positive about femininity in women. Fairlie's traits might normally be attractive in a woman but I'd argue that Collins doesn't really present them that way. Laura is described as beautiful, and Marian mannish and ugly, but once that bit of description is out of the way, I'd argue that Marian's masculine-coded determination is shown as much more admirable than Laura's delicate feminine submission to the will of the men around her.

All of this is pretty consistent with contemporary feminist thought, at least as far as I'm familiar with it. When I first read 'A Vindication of the Rights of Women', from half a century earlier, it shocked me how much time Wollstonecraft spends criticising the failings of women. So maybe this shouldn't be surprising to me, but it is.

I wrote somewhere before how this all reminds me of reading about Old Norse literature, in which in the absence of brave men, a woman will rise up to take on a masculine role, which shames the men but does honour to the woman. There are two typical outcomes from this: either the woman dies amidst the violence she's unleashed (although typically not before she gets her vengeance), or she wins, and is rewarded with marriage to a man who is worthy of her.

I've never read the Woman in White so I don't know what happens at the end (NO SPOILERS PLEASE), and I'm fascinated to find out whether the plot will continue to follow either of those routes. With Marian currently out of the picture, I guess not? But I honestly have no idea where the plot is going, beyond the obvious creeping doom, or how it's all going to be resolved.

I'm looking forward to finding out, and seeing what further takes on Victorian gender roles Wilkie Collins has in store for us.

[atinyladybug-daydreams]

for the if they had a kid ask thingy , glass and kondraki

Ooooh one of my never thought of Rarepair!!!

Name: I'm not sure exactly what first name they would have but I think they would have a very gender neutral first name like Riley or Ash but I can also see them having a name from a classic literature or a good novel courtesy of Kondraki.

As for last names, I feel like they would take Glass as the last name, and Kondraki as a middle name. Kondraki insisted because he already has Draven and wanted Simon to have a turn this time? If that makes sense?

Gender: A girl! Can be cis or transfem but they're definitely not very feminine.

General Appearance: Very tomboy-ish and masculine clothing. I think overalls are pretty fitting. And also light up sneakers.

In terms of physical appearance, their hair are definitely curly. Like. VERY VERY curly. I also think that they look like a messy-tidy kinda person. Like, their clothes are ironed and well-coordinated and very very fitting and looks nice but there's also this kind of mess to it because they're very out and about so it's not 100% aligned.

They're also like. Pretty built. Not like big beefy but like. Definitely someone that looks like they work out and can fight.

Great posture, chipped tooth, kind eyes and hearty grin.

Personality:

I feel like they're going to be very loud and expressive. Also very, very chaotic as the Kondraki family are but in a more like, subtle way due to Glass' influence. I also think they're extremely extroverted and social which is surprising considering both Simon and Kondraki are more on the introverted spectrums.

They have a good heart and are VERY, very sympathetic towards people. Really tries their best to help people. A very headstrong and determined person which can be her downfall because it gets to the point she stops listening to other people thinking she knows best.

Special Talents:

Oh man. This kid is wayyy too talented with a blade. Whether it be a knife, dagger, switchblade, sword or even a butter knife, this kid understands and can use it really well. I mean, look at her parents.

Also has incredible cooking abilities. Kondraki is a great cook and Simon's a great baker so she ends up knowing a lot about cooking and baking, is very familiar with a lot of flavours, textures and spices. Also knows a wide variety of dishes. Honestly, she's a really good person to turn to for food feedback.

Who they like better:

Kondraki! He's the cool dad who taught her fencing and yes even though Simon does teaches her how to use knives, they still think swords are cooler so Kondraki it is!

Who they take after more:

On a surface level personality wise, you think they'd take after Glass more because of how they appear level-headed and kind but man, this kid is pure CHAOS in the Kondraki way.

Personally I think they take after Kondraki more because Kondraki is very very very present in their life (he very regrets him being emotionally unavailable to Draven so he tries his goddamned hardest with this one)

She reacts a lot like Glass, but thinks and feels a lot like Kondraki.

Personal Head canon:

I think when she grows up, she does become an agent much to Glass and Kondraki's absolute horror. Glass is horrified because he was an agent once and man was it rough being on so like he has absolutely no idea why she wants to be an agent and Kondraki is horrified because like, "Draven already gives me a heart attack every month from the shit he deals with and now you're going to add to that too".

Star and planet girly. Would've become an astrophysicist but can't stand the idea of sitting and researching inside all day. They prefer getting hands on and yes astronaut is an option but the idea of kinda sorta being that far from home makes them sad. They like visiting their parents frequently whenever they have time (and get free food while at it).

Face Claim:

Honestly the closest thing I can associate her with is Cassie from FNAF SB Ruin

[hammerhead-jpg]

Ok so @bi-polar-geminii already made a post about this and had fruitful discussions about it but I feel like what I have to say might be too long to fit in their asks but

I definitely agree that SOME redacted artists seem to be unable of drawing diverse characters, keyword SOME because this fandom is one that definitely has a majority of lovely designs

And before I continue I want to point out that I am a snow cockroach myself so maybe I shouldn't be the one discussing this but obviously diversity is not just about race, it's about everything on a person like sexuality, ethnicity, nationality, body type, facial features and structures, hair textures and overall small features and accessories that differentiate the person

Honestly this is something that I've been thinking about for a long while and I won't name drop anyone because this isn't a call out post and I'm not looking to start drama (even though there is a certain someone that comes to mind but we won't talk about that) but I was scared that people would get really pissy.

I know that diversity is something that could be classified under artistic skill and I believe that not every artist who posts on social media can't just draw for fun and as a hobby without having the goal of improving but I do also think that diversity is not only a type of skill in character design but also a small gift to anyone that doesn't fit the the perfect beauty standards and when you seemingly refuse to draw anyone that doesn't fit that standard and like, only draw tank, Milo n Alexis as brownskin then that just kinda seems icky

And btw I'm not saying that it's bad to draw those three as poc (hell my tank is darkskin) but there's a difference between drawing a good chunk of the characters as brownskin/darkskin (obv including characters that don't fit/go against the racist stereotypes) and and those three just kinda end up being part of that group and then like all of your characters being crackers and only them being poc

I'm just saying it wouldn't kill you not to make all of your listener designs the same pretty faced preppy saltine sister and every male character the same dorito back webtoon guy but just with different hairstyles, clothing styles and maybe sometimes body types (but never even slightly chubby cuz god forbid)

And also, can we get some listeners that are male/masc?

This is something that I was kinda scared to talk about because like 90% of the fandom will draw like 90% of their listener ocs as women or very fem presenting and I definitely have quite a few listener designs that are very feminine or could be assumed women on first glances and again, the listener characters are gender neutral for a reason and they are at the end of the day supposed to be self inserts so the redacted fandom being majority fem/women it makes sense that they would make majorly fem/women listener ocs but like... If you're already making ocs would it kill you to make at least ONE of them masc/male? Like at least one you don't care about?

And I know saying that people should make more masc/male listener sounds kinda???? misogynistic???? But I'm not saying that because I think that male representation is a thing but because I think queer representation is a thing

I just think that maybe just maybe a little gay people wouldn't hurt??? Pretty please???with a cherry on top????

And damihux doesn't count!!! You don't get to draw them once and be the ultimate gay ally but ofc only on gay month because any other and you might get sent to hell!!! /hj

Just saying when naive little may 2022 me just finished watching freelancer and Gavin team tag Lasko (but not really because I'm literally a mineral and don't have the Patreon) and then went on social media just to see that the fandom was full of STRAGGOTS my jaw hit the submarine

And just, as we close off I know I'm not the ultimate master of diversity, my designs still fall under the pretty face fluffy hair m shaped bangs that definitely look too young for their age but I'm still working on making my character designs look distinct and diverse, and I will be actively working on it for like forever but I definitely won't lie to myself and say that I haven't improved from my dolphin smooth same face syndrome anime boy faze when I only ever wanted to put facial hair on a character when they were past the age of 27 but only put it on the jaw so they just ended up looking like Abraham Lincoln- so I know that I will get better at it eventually

I too look at more talented who are way better at making distinct designs and making designs for characters who don't have to rely on beauty standards to be absolutely gorgeous and feel bad, especially when basically the whole fandom simultaneously descides that a character is poc, a decision that I missed out on and then the fact that my design is seemingly the only one that is white makes me feel like those people that turn objects into people but just end up making them the same breed of sexy anime boy that nobody likes

So if you're insecure about your designs not being distinct enough the best advice I can give is to step out of your comfort zone and actively look for little details that might make a character unique and you'll get there

In conclusion, people who descide to be a conformist (/j) and draw Gavin with a human skin tone but then make him as pale as an uncooked chicken breast when he's specifically described as tan are kinda weird<3333

Also UNPOPULAR OPINION ‼️‼️

People who make their Lovely oc fem/a woman are DELUSIONAL ‼️ and are LYING TO THEMSELVES and are going to miss out on all the sexy fanfiction I'm going to write about Vincent riding their girthy monster cock ‼️( SLASH J EVERYBODY!!!!!!)

At the end of the day, people can draw whatever they want, but people can also say whatever they want in response to it, so you can't be mad if someone that's not even talking about you directly says that they find it strange that some people act like drawing a person that's not completely cis, white, straight, able bodied and a super model without it being some sort of subconscious stereotype will give them the plague

[a-quiet-borderline-diary]

I haven't made an entry in a while. I have a second partner now, and we are in love. We started dating about 4 months ago but it feels like we have been together for a long time.

He is so affectionate and helpful. He gets along well with my husband (primary/nesting partner) quite well. We even play dnd in a group together and that is more fun than I thought it would be! It is my first campaign ever.

My bf is in college still, but he is set to graduate within a year or so. My husband and I are staying in this area for about 2 more years. I already have hopes and dreams about moving somewhere (possibly new), and bringing my partner with us. I wish my husband found another partner like that as well. He does have a current partner, but he told me that when he talked to her about the future it didn't sound like she wanted the same things as we do. They are still together and enjoying their time for now, but I wish she was on board with planning to live together someday.

I know for most couples 4 months or so isn't long enough to decide if you want to move to another state with someone though so maybe in time she will change her mind. If not, I'm sure there are plenty more fish in the sea (especially moving to a more urban area, we are currently in a rural area with few polyamorous or queer folks).

My husband and I have a dream that one day we will own a decent sized house that can accommodate 2 additional partners. We will live life all 4 of us together, helping eachother.

My husband and I already decided that only he and I will have shared bank accounts (we have always chosen to share finances completely since marriage), but it would be a more comfortable life with 2 more household incomes with no kids. (sorry to say, but he and I refuse to date anyone who has children).

I think we both just really yearn for a communal life, even if we wouldn't want to do anything like go off grid. We really like the idea of having our own chosen family.

As a bisexual, it isn't what I had in mind to end up with another male presenting partner, but I simply fell in love with him. I think a lot of what attracts me to my other partner is that even though he identifies as male, he is very feminine. He is smaller than me, and when I hold him it feels similar to holding a woman. I really like that tbh, he has a very androgynous appearance and way of carrying himself.

My husband identifies as nonbinary, more so than I do (although I consider myself probably gender fluid if I had to describe it.) He presents pretty masculinely, but he has feminine qualities in his personality and takes on some more "feminine" gender roles in the house (like cooking, which I do not do.)

My husband's current partner is really cool, I like her a lot. In my opinion, they have more space between them than I do with my bf but it doesn't seem to bother either of them. Maybe this is because they know it may not last beyond the 2 years we are living in this area. It would be so nice if she grew to consider moving with us when we leave, but even if she decides not to stay with my husband it is nice to spend time with her as a "polycule" now.

Since my husband's partner does not seem to cling to him as much as my bf does to me, it feels like I need to work on spending more time with him. Over the next couple of years I definitely need to work on my dynamics juggling my time with both of my partners. Sometimes I still think it would be nice to have a gf as well, but I honestly don't think I could easily juggle my time for a true relationship with another added person. Maybe when I feel I have the dynamics of the 2 I have now down pat, it would be possible... But I would be satisfied to just have a platonic relationship with my husband's partner. I just feel overall I'm lacking in close relationships with women and I would at least like a close female friend again.

I am friends with my husband's current gf, and I enjoy spending time with her but she has always operated as sort of a lone wolf even in her romantic relationship with him. That makes it hard to get close to her tbh, but I know she has reasons why she is the way she is. It's not anything personal.

All in all, I have just found myself daydreaming about the future a lot. I really have faith that my partner is serious about joining our life in a couple of years and it feels nice, but still we have quite a bit of waiting and time here before we enter the next step of our lives.

I have a positive outlook and I'm really happy to have 2 wonderful and loving partners. I can't wait to see what our futures have in store

[roseenindigo-blog]

Doing some of these with Lotus b/c I'm in the mood to rant and I will never pass up an opportunity to info dump about my bbg:

Apperance:

Honestly, I can't see him having one. Lotus suffers from pretty low self-esteem, and I feel like he would probably see himself as ugly (even tho he's drop-dead gorgeous)

In my head (mainly due to me being a huge platonic simp for him), I love to imagine him wearing a black dress, particularly a strapless floor-length dress with a slit, but realistically, I think he would opt for smth more masculine, like a long sleeve black dress shirt, black dress pants, and black dress shoes

Absolutely (for reasons explained in question 1). I think he would most likely opt to make himself taller and overall bigger looking, considering the fact that him being so short and small makes him more of a target in Underfell

While I don't think he would wear it out a whole lot cause he feels they don't make him look super presentable, I think he really loves wearing fuzzy things, like fuzzy hoodies or garments lined with faux fur

It depends on who's scars you're referring to. If you're talking about HIS scars, he definitely thinks they're super ugly and is rather insecure about them. If you're asking about OTHER PPLS scars, however, I think he would think they're fine, even kind of attractive (cough cough, Rurik, cough cough)

Not a lot, mainly b/c a) he's an alt, so most trends to fit his style, b) he usually doesn't care that much about how strangers perceive him, and c) he's too depressed to keep up with them

Less so physically, but I definitely think Lotus would want to be more like Goth. After seeing the trend 'what would your character look like without trauma', I thought about what Lotus would look without trauma, and I came to the conclusion that he would basically just be Goth. This revelation sparked a whole idea where Lotus is extremely jealous of Goth, and essentially views him as what HE'S supposed to be.

He has 3. 1) His singular red eye light, 2) his razorblade shark teeth, and 3) (my own personal headcannon) his hips that just don't quit

Since he's a skeleton and thus doesn't really sweat/produce odors the same way humans do, I'm not really sure he'd have any natural smell, but if I had to give him a sent, I think he would smell smth like oak wood and sweet apples; smth dark and sophisticated

BOOTS. LOTUS IS ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED WITH BOOTS, AND NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE. He probably has at LEAST 30 and phsyically CANNOT pass up a sale on them

His favorite colors (black and red) are pretty much the only colors he wears. The only other colors I think he would wear is maybe green on occasion, or maybe smth with white accents

Kind of. While living with his parents, they really only provided him with the most basic of clothing, and it's not like he had the funds or freedom to get anything. Once he finally got away from them and started buying his own clothes, I think he would start really leaning into alt fashion, particularly grunge (probably b/c I'm grunge lol)

Lingerie for sure. He's way to self conscious and insecure to wear stuff like that

Probably more feminine/cutesy stuff. I think he'd have a lot more of a desire to wear more feminine clothes than cutesy clothes, but he probably would still feel like he couldn't really pull off either

It really just depends on what it is. If you picked smth that matched his style, he'd probably be willing to try it out, but if it doesn't, he would immediately toss it right back into your face. I also imagine one of his pet peeves is ppl giving unsolicited advice/criticism to his outfits

It depends on what you notice about him. If you see him as a small, tiny, physically weak person, you'll probably be in for a bit of a shock when he attacks you with his quick wit, snarky remarks, and magical prowess. However, If you pick up on his sharp teeth, resting bitchface, and defensive posture, you probably won't be surprised to find out that he's rather feisty and hotheaded.

I think his favorite holiday is probably Halloween and he'd definitely find cosplaying to be cool, but I don't think he'd really enjoy just wearing costumes himself. That being said, he gives absolutely no shits about what other ppl do, so as long as it doesn't negatively effect him or his loved ones, so if you want to, he has 0 opinion

I think he really digs his usual outfit, but he also really like wearing oversized band tee-shirts with baggy ripped jeans that reveal fishnets underneath, paired with a belt chain, spiked leather bracelets, and combat boots

Since he's a skeleton, he physically can't get tattoos, but I headcannon that his human counterpart would have a bunch of them. Some of them included the hunter's mark and the vile bloods' sigil (both from Bloodborne - his favorite video game) on his upper arms, wings on his shoulder blades, and a Lotus flower on his wrist (his first tattoo)

Objects:

His scarf. He usually will find some sort of way to incorporate it into all of his outfits. He also doesn't really like not wearing a hood, but he's more willing to go without that

Money. I imagine he'd just give them a basic bitch card with $20 in it or smth of a similar vain. He probably wouldn't really ever have to do this tho since he doesn't really talk to ppl that much and he's usually not too shy about letting ppl know he doesn't like them

Plants. I definitely love following idea that Lotus has a green thumb despite being a the literal demigod of death, and often admires and buys them. He would also probably admire different types of food, considering I also like to follow the headcannon that he enjoys cooking. And ofc, him being the little nerd he is, books. Man is obsessed with reading, and probably has a whole library atp. He wonders around book stores like a kid in a candy shop for hours until some (usually Rurik) pulls him out

I don't really think there's an *item* Lotus lost that he can't get back, considering that I don't take him for the materialistic type and he probably took all the objects that do hold sentimental value with him when he left his parents house

Maybe if it was smth he really needed but was stupidly overpriced. He probably wouldn't usually tho

Coming back to his love of plants, I think he would be really proud of his garden and houseplants. He's spent a lot of time and money tending to them, and he definitely takes pride in how nice and well cared for they are. He would also be devastated if anything bad happened to them. Another good, but repeating answer is his book collection. I do imagine it would end up getting pretty massive as time goes on, probably covering a whole wall, if not more, in his and Rurik's house.

No. Like previously stated, he's not a super materialistic person, and he extremely responsible and mature in general, so naturally he is also financially responsible

It would probably have to be if one/multiple/all of his loved ones' lives/livelihoods was/were on the line (i.e. Rurik, his children, his siblings, or his friends). Maybe if his life/livelihood was on the line, but considering his depression and struggle with suicidal thoughts, it depends on what stage of his life its happening at, and how he's feeling mental that day (as upsetting as that is)

Most likely give. I imagine he feels a bit awkward receiving gifts, both due not being used to getting them and having low self-esteem, but would find enjoyment in getting ppl thoughtful items that shows he cares and pays attention to them

Knifes. I'm pretty sure its cannon that both Lotus and Goth have a fear of knifes. I don't necessarily have a definite reason for why Lotus has this fear (I certainly don't have any explanation for Goth), it probably has smth to do with past abuse he's suffered, like from his parents, or maybe even Rurik

Edgy shit, like black clothing, spiked jewelry, or satanic items

Not usually. Maybe sometimes his plants tho. I like to think he would have some sort of plant that would remind him of Rurik, like a cactus with an orange flower on it or some tiger lilies. Following that train of thought, he'd probably get plants that symbolize/remind him of his loved

I know I've already given these answers several times, but plants and books. Lotus has his hobbies and he sticks to them

I feel he would be slightly embarrassed about how much he wants weapons replicas/character figures from his favorite games/shows. Maybe less so the fact the he wants/has them and more so how much money he's willing to/has spent on them

Probably handmade, but it honestly just depends on what it is. Like, if you gave him a handmade crochet bikini and a store-bought bouquet of flower, he'd definitely like and appreciate the flowers more, but overall he would appreciate the time, energy, and thought that would go into making him smth

Not usually. Once again, he's not super materialistic and doesn't have great self esteem, so not only does he not really have a whole lot of things he wants at a given time, but he also feels bad having his loved ones spend money on him. He prefers/feels the need just to do/get things himself

The quality of whatever he's buying. While he is definitely financially responsible, I think he'd rather buy smth that's more expensive but of higher quality than smth cheaper that's of a lower quality

I'm definitely gonna do more of these later, I've just already done over 35 of them and I'm too tired to continue rn lol

🌸My Super Long Hopefully Fun Character Ask Game:

👕Appearance

What is your character's favorite physical trait they possess?

What would your character wear if they were told they had to gussy up?

Is there something about your character's appearance that they would change if possible?

Does your character have a favorite material they like to wear?

What are your character's opinion on scars?

How much interest does your character take in trends?

Is there someone your character tries to look similar to?

Does your character have a physical trait that they're known for?

What does your character smell like?

If your character could splurge on a particular garment, what would it be?

Is your character's favorite color a color they wear often?

Has your character gone through major stylistic or physical changes?

What is something your character would refuse to wear?

Is there a style your character is afraid they can’t pull off?

Would your character wear something someone else picked out for them?

Is your character's appearance more telling or deceiving?

What are your character's thoughts on wearing costumes?

Does your character have a favorite outfit?

If your character had to get a tattoo what would it be?

📦Objects

Is there an item your character doesn't like to leave without?

What gift would your character give to someone they didn't like but felt obligated to?

What type of object is likely to catch your character's attention?

Is there an item your character liked that they can’t get back? 

Would your character ever try to haggle?

What is something your character is proud to own?

Does your character ever spend more than they have?

What would it take for your character to give up an item they really like?

Does your character prefer to give or receive gifts?

Is there a type of object your character doesn’t like?

What might an acquaintance think is a good gift for your character?

Does your character personify objects?

What does your character most enjoy shopping for?

Is there an item your character is embarrassed they own or want?

Would your character prefer something bought or made personally?

Is your character willing to ask for things?

What is most important to your character when shopping?

🍽️Food and Drink

What flavor would your character say their personality is?

Would your character prefer baking, cooking or mixing drinks?

Is there a food or drink your character is unwilling to try?

How big is your character's appetite?

Does your character consider eating fun?

Would your character eat or drink something they didn't like to appease someone?

Is there food that has made your character sick?

What is your character's favorite food group?

Does your character like to try new foods?

What is a childhood meal your character cherishes?

Is your character food motivated?

Which mealtime is your character's favorite?

How much does your character care about wasting food?

Does your character prefer restaurant food or home cooked food?

What food or drink does your character consider a treat?

Is there a food texture your character doesn't like?

What kind of drinks does your character prefer?

🌤️Weather and Nature

What would your character do if they were suddenly caught in the rain?

Has your character had a meaningful encounter with an animal?

What season would your character say they're most similar to?

Is there a natural phenomenon that scares your character?

Has your character ever had an animal phase?

Would your character enjoy sky gazing?

Does your character have a good sense of direction?

What type of environment does your character like best?

Is your character good with animals?

How would your character react to snow?

What part of nature would your character most resonate with?

Could your character survive in the wilderness on their own for a week or more?

What element best represents your character?

Does your character prefer hot or cold weather?

Is there a creature that scares your character?

What celestial body would interest your character the most?

Is your character good with plants?

How willing would your character be to nap outside?

What animal would your character say best represents them?

🤝Community and Relationships

Does your character prefer company or solitude when sick?

What is your character's favorite kind of social event?

How comfortable would your character be singing and dancing in front of others?

Is your character upfront about their feelings?

Who would your character first seek if they needed medical help?

How willing would your character be to go to a party with people they don't know?

Who is your character most honest with?

How likely is it for your character to initiate a friendship?

Where is your character's comfort place?

Is there a habit your character has that they learned from someone else?

Does your character have people they think would worry about them if they got injured?

How would your character react to being put in a position of leadership?

Would your character be good at providing medical assistance?

Who would your character say knows them best?

Is there a person your character would turn to for backup in a fight?

Who would your character most want to sign their cast if they got one?

How well does your character work with others?

What is your character's favorite form of affection?

Does your character enjoy celebrating holidays?

What would it take for your character to get into a fight?

💓Mind, Body and Soul

What is a habit your character has that others might find cute?

Are there particular sounds your character is fond of?

Is your character more prone to fight or flight?

Does your character believe in myths and fairy tales?

What words could tear your character down?

How well does your character act under pressure?

Is your character good at practicing self-care?

What scents does your character find comforting?

Does your character have any allergies?

Is your character a light, medium or heavy sleeper?

Does your character have strong willpower?

Is your character more likely to give advice or seek it?

How does your character relax?

Is there a secret thing your character longs to hear?

Does your character have a sleep routine?

Would your character feel confident in a fight?

Is your character more energized in the morning, afternoon or at night?

How often does your character have nightmares?

Are there scents your character dislikes?

Is there a fear your character wants to learn to overcome?

If your character had to act in a play what role would they think they’d best perform?

Does your character have a high pain tolerance?

🎲 Hobbies and Activities

What kind of games does your character most enjoy playing?

Does your character have a secret hobby?

What is a talent your character wishes they had?

Is there an activity your character used to enjoy that they now dislike?

Which does your character try to prioritize more, work or hobbies?

Does your character work better with creative or technical endeavors?

What is a talent that your character is proud of?

Is your character more outdoorsy or indoorsy?

What is a topic your character would be excited to talk about? 

Is there a skill your character doesn’t know they’re bad at?

Does your character have any injury stories?

What kind of music does your character enjoy?

Has your character ever made something for themselves or someone else?

What is your character’s opinion on cheating in games?

How good is your character at following through on projects?

What’s an activity that reminds your character of someone else?

Does your character prefer music or silence?

What is a topic your character wouldn't want to talk about?

[dreamyfreakout]

If this is too personal feel free to ignore. I'm trans and have been trying to transition, but its very difficult in a rural area. Evey year I don't is a year of second guessing myself. It doesn't help that transphobes play with statistics and try to tell horror stories about people regretting their transition. You used to think you were a trans woman, but then realized you were non-binary and missed some of the masculine traits. Do you regret it heavily? Like does it feel like the end of the world, or are you overall more happy with the choices you made? I get the feeling I'm probably more nonbinary, but I want to be fem, however I worry that might be simply because I'be never had that side to explore.

transition regret, etc... is largely just misinformation!

i transitioned for 8 years, i'm still on estrogen/t-blockers. i probably will be for-ever? i don't regret transitioning and being on hormones, cus it's made me a lot happier & i've gotten to explore my relationship to my body. a lot of my reasons for exploring more nonbinary - ungendered - masc gender feelings is tbh trauma.. and i don't want surgery and i don't believe in gendering bodies, don't care about passing as a woman to others, etc.. so i didn't have a roadmap to follow and binary trans woman narratives did not resonate with me.

basically, i'm just very genderqueer/genderpunk/agender and binary transition isn't fruitful for me. it's very limited and painful in my experience. i don't mask being neurodivergent anymore && i sure don't try to mask being trans/queer/gendery.

actually, the more thoughts and energy i put into passing and being accepted as a woman, i realized... it's like asking society to validate my existence and make me happy, and for me.. it did not feel empowering.

i think allowing myself to explore trans masc feelings has been great, but the narrative of regret/detransition being placed on me/presumed kinda sucks tbh (actually, really!). it's not a thing where i thought i was a trans woman and was wrong lol.. i had lots of nonbinary feelings throughout and i still really resonate with being trans fem in some way, just not in a binary way.

i'm still exploring those trans masc feelings. i shaved my mustache last week (lol) and was very depressed this weekend. it's such a weird feeling to not find comfort in looking feminine. i guess i am happiest being in a grey trans masc area, where i am clearly pretty fem and queer and gendery, but also putting some effort into some masc presentation.

imo, you can't really live life by regret, it's just a toxic emotion and way of framing your life in a negative way. sure, i have regrets (mainly people i've dated, jobs i've taken..) but you have to live your life and try to be happy and do what's best in the moment. You really do not know how you will feel 10 years from now, but if you try your best today to be happy, i don't think future you will be mad at present you for trying.

note: i honestly stopped sharing photos, etc. a lot last year cus of these narratives of detransition/regret and like.. i'll just add that noone has to have a narrative that makes sense to others.. i have a lot of respect and love for people who are okay exploring the spectrum of gender and going against binary gender norms.

i hope that helps, but it's very much your own personal journey and your own internal process of dismantling internalized transphobia/transmisogyny which is where i think a lot of those regrets/detransition narratives stem from, imho.

[morethanaloveinterest]

A Leather-Clad Review of Natasha Romanoff's Costumes in the Avengers

Let's talk about what Natasha wears while she's working for SHIELD (under the cut)

This is the outfit Nat is wearing when we first see her. The General seems to be in a dress uniform (maybe?), so it is likely that they came from a party. Her dress is good for blending into such an environment (contrast to her dress from IM2 that she wears to Tony's party - it was definitely meant to catch the eye). Making me wonder if she was intentionally caught by this guy or if her initial plan was just to sneak around his house/place of business, where the party took place. Someone read those prelude comics and let me know if it says anything.

Female representation: 7/10 It's above-average for the genre, honestly (and for 2012). But the excuse of her being undercover and wanting to catch Tony's notice in IM2 doesn't really work here, so I don't think it's as good as the outfits in that movie.

Practicality: 6/10 She makes it work, obviously, but the hose is already ripped and would easily become more so. Not much in the way of protection, making me think these circumstances weren't the plan (she ALWAYS dresses for the occasion). Her hair length is more practical than in IM2, though it still gets in her face. And no shoes (or the heels) aren't ideal. Good thing there aren't any stray nails in this warehouse.

This is what she wears to go get Bruce out of Calcutta. It matches her intention of being non-threatening and is very soft-feminine. Probably the softest thing we ever see her wear (?), with the skirt and the shawl and everything. It's very different from what she wears normally, which makes sense, even if she's not really undercover here - she is still on a mission and wants to present herself a certain way.

Female representation: 8/10 I'm not sure how to rate this one, though it shows less skin (and feet...) than the previous dress, so is probably better? Both are fine, neither are amazing.

Practicality: 8/10 Very practical for her to wear in this situation, where keeping Bruce calm is paramount. And, as we see later, wearing her tac suit doesn't really help if he loses control. The skirt isn't very practical for running or getting away, though, if the situation arose.

This is the first glimpse into what becomes Natasha's civilian clothes. A tight shirt/tank top, leather jacket, skinny jeans. The top here (and at the end) is brighter in color than most of her other outfits, which makes sense with the aesthetic of this movie. It, combined with the other civilian clothes, tell us some things about her - she's very practical, doesn't like loose-fitting clothes, and has an endless amount of leather jackets.

Female representation: 9/10 It's a great outfit, nothing jumps out as male-gazey. And it makes sense for her to wear mostly tight-fitting clothes, matching her tac suit.

Practicality: 9/10 Very practical - she can move easily, she has a holster on her thigh, she's pretty prepared for whatever might come her way.

I'm going to do a separate post outlining all her Black Widow costumes throughout the years, which I'll link here when it's done. But, overall, I'd say this is an improvement over the previous one. I like that it's all black and has two thigh holsters (yeah, the location can be sexualized, but it makes sense from the perspective of being easy to reach).

Female representation: 9/10 As I said on the last one, this is a great translation of her skin-tight suit in the comics to being something a real human woman would wear.

Practicality: 10/10 I'm just going to give all her suits the highest rating on practicality because I don't think Nat would put up with having an impractical suit, you know? Despite the angles used in some of the posters for this movie, it's a very practical piece of clothing.

This is the second civilian outfit that Nat wears, giving us a peek at another of her endless leather jackets. Same as above, with a tight shirt/tank top and skinny jeans. Again, lighter colors than we see later. I wonder if there is any significance to the top being black and orange when the previous one was red and orange - red and black being her colors, after all.

Female representation: 9/10 Same as the previous iteration of this outfit - it's nice that she wears tight clothes without that fact being emphasized.

Practicality: 8/10 No thigh holster, so obviously less practical

Check out my other costume ratings here

Please come listen to me talk about Natasha's character arc in each movie on Youtube - the whole 6-part series out now!

[themaveriqueagenda]

honestly, masculinity and femininity are already highly subjective, and so is maverinity and everything else. for example, i'm always presenting maverine, no matter if i'm wearing a dress and dangly earrings or a big hoodie, no matter if people look at me from the outside and think something about me is "feminine" or "masculine". i refuse to ever call myself or my presentation masculine or feminine no matter what some norms say.

but i also know that how people see us is important, and that's the hard part. anything that's not either conventionally feminine or masculine is highly subjective, even for outside observers. even when i dress in a way that most people wouldn't see as overly masculine or overly feminine, most people would still put me in one box or another because they've been taught to put everyone in a binary. it can literally be as simple as "everyone i know who wears those kind of trousers is a man, so this person must be a man" or "most people i know who wear rings are women, so this person is probably a woman". even if lots of people couldn't place us, it's pretty much impossible to nail it with everyone.

and then there's also the problem what you said, that there's no "look" associated with maveriques (which is probably for the better, tbh). in terms of presentation, people only really know (or think they do) what masculinity, femininity, androgyny & maybe neutrality/ungenderedness look like.

most people couldn't even tell apart androgyny (a blend of masculinity & femininity) from neutrality/ungenderedness (the absence of anything that could be easily gendered as masculine or feminine), so either of those would be a good bet (and you can call it maverine, because again, subjective.

if what's considered androgyny has too many masculine or feminine elements for your liking, there are two options: if you don't want to be bold, incorporate as many elements that can't easily be put into masculine or feminine categories because they are quite literally neutral. clothes that don't fit too tight but not too loose, hair that's not too short and not too long etc. and if you do want to be bold about it, present in a way that's so out there that it's essentially almost too alien to be gendered. for me personally, my name and neopronouns are part of that, as well as some of the space themed clothing i have. it's convenient that i'm a trekkie because in certain trek related clothing i feel like people primarily see me as "geek" than anything gendered.

(and i want to be gendered, gendered as maverique, but let's be honest, that's unfortunately not gonna happen. unfortunately when it comes to outside perspective, we have to settle for androgyny or neutrality and being overall confusing.)

if you're not primarily worried about outside perspectives, just fuck around and find out what gives you maverine gender euphoria, what affirms your maverinity, what makes you look at yourself and go "this is so gender". i've also found that because maverinity doesn't really exist in mainstream society at all that this feeling is more subtle, like "this is so me".

maverinity doesn't have a look, but at the same time it's useful to remind yourself that masculinity and femininity also don't really have looks: more often than not those terms are just imposed on certain objects or people because binaries are normalised. but i have seen lots of people who consider skirts and dresses and nail varnish part of their masculine gender presentation and people who consider ties and suits part of their feminine gender presentation, so maverinity can look like anything.

at the end of the day, maverine presentation is what makes you feel like you.

Question For Maveriques (And Others)

So I find that when my gender is maverique, or leaning towards that direction, I have the urge to present that way, but I have a very difficult time imagining what a maverine gender presentation would even look like. It would be a presentation that's not masculine or feminine, but its own thing entirely (and also not genderless or neutral) but I'm not sure what that would look like (and how it would differ from genderless presentation since I'm also genderless.) My question is, what ideas do you have about what a maverine presentation might look like? Cause I'm struggling here.

[gothichorrorshow]

1, Genderfae specifically, or just the umbrella terms of genderfluid or nonbinary.

2, Too many to list here but my top 2 are sky/skyr and fae/faer!

3, Nonbinary was a bit ago (like a yearish I think) but I just started using genderfae- (not saying specific ages as that would reveal my age)

4, Just be yourself and stop caring what others will think.

5, That all nonbinary people are agender, annoys me a lot-

6, Not really but props to all celebrities that were brave enough to come out!

7, I'm only out to tumblr and friends but with coming out to my friends I almost always used a joke or a pun-

8, The genderfae will steal your name and pronouns!

9, If my sibling counts then yeah, but otherwise no at least not irl (I think)

10, Yes, probably Luz from The Owl House-

11, I usually use lgbtq+

12, Not being a girl or a boy, but something else entirely.

13, I occasionally still get gender dysphoria even when I feel mostly like a girl, no clue how it works-

14, I was just thinking about different things I could name myself since my previous name wasn't really fitting anymore, and I came up with Syd!

15, I have a girlfriend and she's pretty cool about my identity but constantly forgets and continues to use she/her no matter how much I correct her-

16, I actually usually go with girlfriend, but when that makes me dysphoric I go with partner.

17, It's ok if you don't exactly fit the dictionary definition of whatever identity you want to go by, if it feels like it fits you're allowed to use it! Also it's fine to be wrong about your identity and cycle through a lot, there were so many different things I identified as before this!

18, All of them (half joking) The overall nonbinary one, maybe the genderfluid one sometimes, the genderfae one, and the transgender one! That's it when it comes to gender, but with sexuality I have a lot more-

19, Honestly idk-

20, All of them.

21, It changes between feminine and androgynous in my gender but my presentation is either really feminine or really masculine with no in between. (usually more feminine (sadly))

22, My hair, my style, and my talent for art!

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

Since over 400 of you agreed that it’s Nonbinary November, I decided to do something fun for my nonbinary kids and came up with this: 

22 Questions for Nonbinary November! 

1.Which labels do you use?

2.What are your pronouns?

3.How old were you when you came out to yourself as nonbinary?

4.What’s one thing you’d like to tell your younger self?

5.Is there a myth about nonbinary people that annoys you the most?

6.Is there a nonbinary celebrity you look up to?

7.If you’re out, how did you come out?

8.Is there a gender-related pun you like? 

9.Do you have friends who identify as nonbinary, too?

10.Do you have a favorite lgbt+ character?

11. Lgbt, lgbt+, lgbtqa+… which one do you usually use?

12. How do you explain the term “nonbinary” to people who have no idea what it means?

13.Tell us a fun fact about yourself (gender-related or random!) 

14.How did you find your name? 

15.If you’re in a relationship, how did your partner react to your coming-out?

16.Do you prefer partner, datemate, significant other or something else?

17.A piece of advice for questioning kids?

18.Which flag(s) do you use?

19.Any tips for bad days?

20.Do you have a favorite nonbinary blog on tumblr?

21.Feminine, masculine, androgynous - or none of those things?

22. What are your three favorite things about yourself?

If you’re on the nonbinary spectrum, you can copy those and answer them on your blog (and tag me!).You can do all at once or one a day. Feel free to skip any questions you don’t want to answer. 

I hope this will be a fun way for nonbinary people to share their stories and a way for others to learn more about the nonbinary community! <3 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad