#i'm finally catching up on tsitp

[fangirlingdweeb]

Me whenever I see belly and jeremiah on screen:

(i'm a petty conrad girly, what can i say 🤷)

[nqctar]

εϊз salt air, and the rust on your door ; anton lee

pairing. bf!anton lee x f!reader. genre. fluff, childhood friends to lovers. inspired by tsitp. synopsis. (the summer house pt. 1) breathing in the salty air during a hot august night spent at anton's summer house alters your brain somehow. you gather the courage to tell anton that you love him. warnings. kissing/make out, physical touch. wc. 883 words. author’s note. sorry that i disappeared for so long, i was on trial for fraud :/ i’m back now though !!

( 🐚 ) ONE SUMMER CAN CHANGE EVERYTHING.

you awake from your nap sometime late into the evening. in the distance you hear something orchestral, it’s soft and melodic and surrounds you like a chorus of angels welcoming you into your new forever. “must be anton’s cello,” you think.

of course it was. you step out of his bedroom, the floorboards creak one by one as you tip toe out into the living room. you’re greeted by his silhouette, the point of his shoulders broad as ever as he sits up tall, hands moving the bow as he plays. you hear him mutter a few frustrations.

he pauses, and then halfway turns to you.

“finally, you’re up. please sit down and tell me what the hell i’m doing wrong.” you smile as you sit crisscrossed on the shag carpet in front of him, somewhat reminiscent of the first kindergarten day you’d ever met him.

anton begins again, his eyes focused on the sheet music in front of him. you admire how handsome and focused he looks, his movements sophisticated to a standard you’d never seen before. he proceeds to play something that makes you feel as if you’re floating in the clouds. every note rings out thick through your ears, you’re practically surrounded by music notes by the time he’s done. whatever he’d just played had changed your life in only three minutes.

“fuck you forever,” he mutters. it catches you off guard and you look at him like a deer caught in headlights. anton notices your expression and quickly follows up. “oh my god, not you. the cello. i didn’t mean you.”

“why do i suck at playing today?” you shake your head at him. suck at playing? anton?? there's no way. "that's impossible," you retort. "i think i literally ascended just now. you're fine, anton. actually— you're perfect." he flashes that wide grin at you and woah, you are so glad you were already sitting down because you would've collapsed otherwise.

"thanks, baby. i hope you aren't just saying that because you're my girlfriend." you shake your head at him again. you could never lie to anton. to you, he was the greatest cello player on earth. you'd spend an entire lifetime proving it to the world if you could.

"anton, i'm saying that because it's the truth. and also because i love you." his head jerks back at your words, eyes going wide as ever. your face goes red and you question what overcame you to finally admit the quiet part out loud. was it the salty cape cod air altering your brain chemicals? had you been possessed by cupid himself?

anton puts his bow down and steps away from his instrument. you're curious as to what he's going to do. he walks over to you and then somewhat crouches onto his knees, caressing the back of your head with his hand. you're face to face and closer than you'd been all day. the air must be doing something to the both of you, because any of your usual shyness is gone. far, far gone. anton gives you a soft smile. you admire how pretty he is up this close, lucky that you're the only one who gets to see him in such an intimate way.

the silence between you two is more than comfortable. it feels like it was your destiny to be here, in this moment. the sound of waves crashing against the nearby shore fills the space around you. in a way, it's harmonious. it's just as comforting as waking up to the sound of anton practicing. perfect doesn't even begin to describe your summer.

he leans in and kisses you. first softly, and then with more intensity. his hands run through your hair, they caress your skin and light little fires all over your body. the both of you end up laying on the floor as you're on top of him, with your hands in his hair this time, sending shivers down his spine as he tries to find the meaning of love within your lips. by the time you both pull away for air, your lips are red and faces flushed with nervousness. "there's that familiar shyness creeping back," you think.

"i love you too, y/n. i love you so much." anton whispers as you hover above him. you two move so that you're sitting next to each other, backs against the couch. you lean your head on his shoulder and take his soft hand in yours. "you're so sweet," you say. "how did i get so lucky?" if the intensity of your feelings are only temporary, damn, you never want the honeymoon phase to end. you savor this moment. you savor every moment as if anton would disappear right before your eyes.

"i still don't believe you. tell me i suck at playing the cello and then we can do that again." anton says, disturbing the silence.

"oh my god, shut up."

"fine, you suck." you obviously lie to him.

anton smiles as he leans in once again.

[lansangprincess]

I hope they don't use this book quote to guilt Belly into ending up with Conrad. Using his mom's death as an excuse even though it affected his brother too.

https://youtube.com/shorts/5EmD-DvbxO8?si=wHsazBcblT2JHKFh

i can understand how this can be heartwrenching for a lot of people and how it shows that Conrad's true nature is just buried underneath his grief and poor communication skills and I have so much sympathy and empathy for that. But this is also just another thing that makes me sigh in exasperation.

He talks about the situation like he was doing this selfless act when in actuality he talks about Belly like she has no agency, that she was just manipulated into making the choices that she did, that Jere wasn't a real choice, that if Conrad played the situation the other way then Jere wouldn't have even had a fighting chance and this is making me so tired. I have dealt with so many men like this. The men with the "good heart" that I have to be patient with, waiting for their actions to finally be able to catch up with their intentions and I am all for growth and personal development no matter how slow it is but I'm too tired of having my own mental health dragged down, doing my best to "teach" them when I don't have to be in a relationship in the first place if I don't want to be and if it doesn't actually make life more meaningful and enjoyable.

People don't have to be perfect to be loved but people can be loved without being in a relationship and people can love each other in a relationship and it still be bad for both of them. All these things can be true