#i'm emotionally compromised!

[magefeathers]

My full video of the Tampa Ritual \o/ Yes, I'm insane for recording the whole thing, but also I couldn't really see through the head of the guy in front of me so I'm glad I held my phone over my head for an hour and a half. Audio quality is better than the video quality as I was quite zoomed in, but it sure is the whole show.

Show highlights, in my opinion:

it's very silly, but Vessel, iii, and iv all standing with their backs to the crowd at the end of TNDNBTG was just very cool, to me. cool guys don't look back at the explosions etc etc

also silly, but watching Adam run around stage taking pictures was fun

just. the way the crowd screams when iii and iv (but especially iii) come out onto the stage, and every time they come back out. iii sure is the master of crowd control and the crowd adores him for it

Vessel's barking during The Offering, because me too bestie it's a fun verbal stim (also all I can think of is the Letterkenny bit about DMX barking)

Vessel's screams in general, I'm not typically a fan of harsh vocals but he sounds soooo fucking good live

ii raising/holding out his arms, gesturing at the audience, making what looked like prayer hands, etc. I've seen videos of him doing that but never realized how much he did it, he's so interactive back there and I feel like a lot of the time he isn't paid attention to and/or can't be seen behind the kit

I feel like iv was doing a lot of spinning!! again it might just be bc people usually seem to focus their videoing on Vessel and iii but I wasn't expecting iv to spin as much as he did, and it was fun to watch!

iv was also hanging out on the little stand the keyboard was on for a lot of the time, it was very cute when him and Vessel were playing together up there

Atlantic. Jesus Christ. I was tearing up not only from the song but from the amount of blue lights in the audience, which the video does NOT do justice (I realize in hindsight, it's because I was so zoomed in, I wasn't capturing the full view of the stands)

watching the Espera grooving, especially during the beginning of Hypnosis and the breakdown in The Summoning, they looked like they were loving it as much as the crowd was

The beginning of Alkaline, good god. The camera drifts because I was so entranced by Vessel's stage presence that I wasn't looking at my phone for a while. The way he pulls the mic away from his face and kinda hisses on the end of desire.... I am unwell. I can't tell if you can actually see his fucking grin in this video or if it's just the lights on his face, but if you haven't seen the closeup vid someone else posted of this moment, please track it down. I've been compromised.

Missing Limbs. Fuck. I was crying. Everyone was crying. The way he sings the "without you lying next to me" and "like I've got missing limbs" broke my fucking heart. I adore this man. (bonus: you can hear me saying hell yeah at the beginning bc my bestie @/vacationbiblestudy came back from the merch booth with a shirt for me! he's the one that says "it's pretty" lol)

I'm not gonna lie, I kinda rolled my eyes at the INSANELY noticeable increase in crowd response at the beginning of Chokehold, and then again at the beginning of every TMBTE song, but honestly? The TMBTE portion of the show was genuinely my favorite. All of the songs went so fucking hard. Vessel's voice just got better and better as the show went on, idk how the hell he does it. He started the show amazing and ended the show phenomenal. Witchcraft.

The Summoning. Everything about the Summoning. It wasn't my favorite when I first heard it, but it grew on me, and god it fucks SO severely live. It's incredible. Vessel's voice, his screaming, the Espera dancing, Vessel squatting down to examine iii's playing (and the way he stands up stock straight afterward?? lmao), the DRUM SOLO!!!! and the way everyone waits for Vessel to do the damn Will Smith pose by ii and just screams for him on command, the way Vessel carried the "bad" in "make a good girl bad" god damn, everything.

iii got a mosh pit during Granite, maybe one day he'll get a real wall of death, but at least he got something lmao

the rain sound effects during Rain are really amped up live, and combined with the lights it's just so atmospheric and beautiful

Ascensionism live ALSO fucks severely. I'm surprised the camera wasn't a lot more shaky with how much I was straight up throwing ass. And the lights looking like stars against the ceiling of the stadium was so pretty, even though it didn't translate well in video. And I know I already mentioned ii's hand motions, but especially during Ascensionism, from "my redemption, eternal ascension" until the drums kick back in, ii was FEELING IT back there and I was having so much fun watching him

The bucket hat situation during TMBTE lmao I need to get a clip of just that bit and post it separately. Someone threw the hat on iii's side of the stage while the lights were down and iii was over on iv's side of the stage, and when iii came back he just picked the hat up and immediately put it on. He wore it for a while, then put it on Vessel, who also wore it for a while before just. throwing it on the fucking ground LMAO and then he proceeded to, essentially, dance around it until the song ended and a crew member threw it back out into the crowd

EUCLID!!!!!!!! GOD. GOD. I was getting teary eyed and then the way Vessel sang "do you remember me" just broke the dam and had me sobbing. iii getting the crowd clapping and then stopping them because they weren't on rhythm, and making them start again, iii wearing Sleep Token Mickey ears???? THE NIGHT BELONGS TO YOU!!!! and Vessel literally on his fucking knees for the whole end of the song 😭😭😭😭 and again, Adam in the bg taking pictures (god I hope they get posted at some point)

THIS GOT A LOT LONGER THAN EXPECTED............... THE WHOLE SHOW WAS A HIGHLIGHT. The fact that you can't hear me singing along, or screaming, is a highlight, because I absolutely fucking was. The whole show was fucking incredible, 100000/10, would recommend until I'm blue in the face, worth every goddamn penny I spent and ounce of financial stress the trip put me in. I will never fucking forget it. Especially since I have video evidence lmao

[sandalinbohemia]

When you return to Antiva, I will ask you, on the steps of the estate, if you will do me a great honor. And I dream you will say yes.

[thekittyokat]

you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah

[justfangirlstuffs]

Heart of Glass

A friend of mine finally talked me into reading LDR and this was the result. Takes place after chapter 13. LDR belongs to @spadillelicious

At your wit's end, you decide to try and have a normal time with Sun before opening hours.

cw: suggestive

You x Sun

wordcount: 2040

You came into work feeling a little more rested than you have been in the past few days. You chanced taking a quick glance around for Moon but the janitor was doing a good job of making himself discreet, and you couldn't exactly blame him given recent events. A knot formed in the pit of your stomach and you rubbed at your temples. 

You missed the days when your greatest concern at work was customer service, or not making a total fool of yourself while skating, or… confessing to your crush. It was beyond agonizing how your world had gone from bright and sure to being filled with shadows of uncertainty at every corner overnight. And each day the shadows seemed to grow bigger and more numerous. It almost made you wish you could go back to the days of blissful ignorance before you knew the horrible, horrible truth.

“Good morning, sunshine!” Sun chirped from behind you, causing you to jump nearly a foot in the air. He placed both hands on your shoulders to steady you before you could fall over. “Careful there. You don't even have your skates on and already you're unbalanced.” He gave a soft, playful chuckle in your ear that made your heart squeeze in your chest and your breath catch in your lungs. 

“M-Morning, Sun,” you forced out, trying to simulate even a sliver of the cheer he was radiating..

“You're here early  again  I see, perfect. That means we can get more practice in. I'll make an expert skater out of you yet,” Sun declared, giving a spin and winking at you. 

You gave a soft snort in answer, doubting his claims. Your clumsiness on wheels aside… A dark thought pervaded your mind… would you even live long enough for that to happen? You stared up at Sun, seeing the eagerness in his body language, the way he was practically bouncing in his roller skates, the way his eyes were lit up with excitement and anticipation. He was eager to get you on the roller rink. His dance floor. 

You considered him, and you considered one of your more recent conversations. His confession about the mixtape, how it meant everything to him, how he’d kissed it and handled it like the most precious of treasures. A part of you desperately wanted to believe his words, that he would never hurt you, that he wanted to keep you safe and protect you. But your mind was still swirling in a fog of doubt and fear. 

After what you saw him do you didn't know what to believe anymore. You didn't want to think that all those months of you and him had been a lie. But if they had been… would he really be trying so hard? And then another thought occurred to you, a crazy and possibly insane thought. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to keep Sun endeared to you. If his feelings were really as true as he claimed, then perhaps keeping him on your side might be the smart thing to do. You felt like such a scuzz for even thinking that but it wasn't just about self-preservation on your part. You really did miss your friend. Your Sun. 

“Not this time,” you said, straightening your back and puffing out your chest a little bit. “This time we're going on to MY dance floor.” 

Sun stared down at you, his eyes widening in surprise as he blinked at you. Clearly, you had caught him off guard. “Oh?” The sound was drawn out, laced with intrigue, and his rays gave a little spin. “Do tell. Where is this said dance floor?” 

Swallowing down all of your nerves -and they went down as smoothly as a thick wad of dried bread, with no water to wash it down- you took Sun by the hand and pulled him towards the DJ booth. He gave a soft giggle clearly intrigued as he let you tug him along, his roller skates gliding easily along the floor. When you got to the DJ booth you began flipping through the vinyls looking for the record you had in mind. 

“Skates off," you told him. 

Once again Sun was taken aback by your request. “Sunshine, this is a skating rink,” he reminded you. 

“Oh, what's the matter?” You asked, throwing him a raised eyebrow and the hint of a smirk. “Afraid I'll show you up?” 

Sun laughed and it was the first genuine laugh you heard since... you shook your head. No you couldn't let those thoughts frazzle you now. Not when you had a good flow going. “Someone is feeling daring today,” Sun remarked, and he sounded pleased as punch about it. “All right, then. We’ll play by your rules.” 

While Sun changed out of his skates and into his casual footwear, you searched for a particular vinyl. It didn’t take you long to find what you were looking for, and once you got it set up, the music started and Heart of Glass by Blondie began blaring over speakers. You turned to face Sun and then you begin to move your hips to the music, doing a shuffle as your elbows and knees popped to the beat. 

Sun gazed at you in utter awe. “I didn't know you could dance, sunshine. You've been holding back on me!” 

Normally you didn't, normally you were too embarrassed and self-conscious to dance in front of others. But if this helped you to mend some kind of bridge… 

“Once I had a love, and it was a gas,” you sang as you swayed your hips. 

“Soon turned out, had a heart of glass,” Sun continued as he joined you, shuffling his feet, his limbs moving with a flawless elegance that was so enviable.

As it turned out Sun was just as graceful off the roller rink as he was on it. He matched you move for move and even had the cheek to embellish on some of them. Clearly trying to impress you, and probably also show off a little. Halfway through the song, Sun caught one of your hands and spun you around before pulling you into a dance of his own. With one hand holding yours and the other on your hip, he rocked and swayed your bodies together in time with the music. Your heart surged in your chest a mix of fear and something else. Excitement? Giddy? You decided not to look at it too closely and just enjoy the music and the rhythm that your bodies were making. 

The two of you spun and danced around the small space and you felt a little bit more in control without the skates to put you off balance. Sun did a good enough job of that to you as it was all on his own. At one point Sun had spun you around so that you were face away from him, and you were acutely aware of his hips gently grinding against yours as your back pressed against his chest. It was only for a moment, maybe two, but it caused you to fluster enough that you nearly had a misstep as Sun spun you back around to face him, his smile perfectly bright and innocent.

Despite your nerves, you felt yourself actually having fun. “Lost inside, adorable illusion and I cannot hide,” you sing softly. 

Sun continued the next lyric. “I'm the one you're using, please don't push me aside.” You heard his voice quiver a little at those last few words, his voice becoming almost pleading.  

He pulled you a little closer in the dancing and once again you felt your heart being clenched in your chest. A thought occurred to you just then. (You’d been having a lot of those lately.) What if Moon wasn't the only victim here? You saw how Sun acted around Afton, how whenever the owner came by Sun distanced himself from you. Maybe… maybe Sun acted the way he did because he had to. 

Was that stupid of you to think? Was that naive of you to wish that that was the case? At any rate, you couldn't allow yourself to fully believe it as much as you wanted to. There was too much doubt, too many holes in this gruesome picture that you found yourself a part of unwittingly. But in your heart of hearts you wanted to hold on to that hope that the Sun that you knew, the friend who had always been there to brighten your day and bring a smile to your face, you wanted to believe that that was the real Sun. 

The two of you finished out the song, Sun slowing down the dance as the outro played until he was just gently swaying you with him. Holding you close so that your heart was practically hammering against his chest plate. 

“I missed this,” he murmured against your hair. “I missed us.” 

“Me too,” you said, allowing yourself to be honest. 

Sun began humming, but not to the tune that was playing. It was a different song entirely. A much older one. “You Are My Sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray~. You'll never know dear how much I…” His whole body shuddered, his sun rays twitching and his words seemed to hitch. 

You stared up at him, your mouth agape. “S-Sun?” It was a question, and you still weren't sure you wanted to know the answer. 

Sun slowed the both of you to a halt, staring down at you with those pale eyes that seemed so… vulnerable at the moment. His hands reached up to cradle your face and your cheeks were hot against his cool silicone and metal digits. 

“I know you're still… uncertain. But unlike you, there is no doubt in my mind about how I feel.” 

He leaned down and in a panic, you closed your eyes too scared to back away or to move forward. But instead of a touch on your lips, you felt his smile press against your forehead in a sweet and affectionate gesture. 

“Not to worry, sunshine,” he said softly. “If… when that happens, it will be because you wanted it.” 

Your heart swelled and you almost wanted to cry. So many emotions and thoughts and feelings were swirling around in your head, distorting your reality and making you dizzy. Were you a terrible person for leading him on like this? Were you an even worse person for still loving him as much as you did? You opened your eyes to look at him but before you could say or think to say anything, you heard a distant banging on a door breaking the mood. 

Sun glanced over to the front doors, an unamused laugh emitting from him. “Looks like we have some eager beavers this morning. It's still ten minutes til opening.” 

Sun parted from you and you had to fight the urge to reach out and grab his windbreaker to stop him. He slipped his roller skates back on and flashed you his trademark grin. “I'll take care of things, sunshine. Why don't you go grab yourself a cup of coffee real quick? I made you a fresh pot.” 

“Thank you,” you said, giving him a smile. And for the first time in a while, it didn't feel forced. 

“No, thank you, sunshine.” He lingered in the doorway, gripping the door frame tightly. “I really needed this. More than I think you'll ever know.” 

With that, he skated off to help the customers, all while singing the song that was playing “The tide is high but I'm holding on, I'm gonna be your number one~.”

You collapsed down into one of the swivel chairs, needing to catch your breath from the whirlwind of the last several minutes. For just a short while things had felt normal again. It felt like you had your friend and crush back. The hope in your heart, once a little seedling, was starting to grow, and you were wondering if it was too late to root it out. You just prayed that Sun would keep his promise. Because the hurt at his betrayal would kill you long before a bullet from his gun.

[cryptid-crusader]

Look. Larian made Halsin too powerful. Every word that man says, every time he looks at my tav with his shiny soulful eyes, I hoot and holler and melt and my brain short circuits. He's too much and I love him SO MUCH.

[reactionimagesdaily]

[dandp]

The face of a man who DEFINITELY hates when Phil starts on his bus shower rant

[myinky-cloak]

I have seen All Of Us Strangers today. It is not ok to do this to people. That was completely uncalled for.

I am starting a support group for everyone who has been emotionally devastated by Andrew Scott. You'll be hearing from our lawyers, Andrew.

[blindmagdalena]

Dadlander but his daughter is nicknamed Carebear because of him

NOOOOOOO i felt myself physically MELT when i heard him say "hey carebear" in my head 😭😭😭

is it because she has her very own carebear stare. tell me that's why. i'm crying.

[mrbluesummers-moved]

Millions Knives + Apples

[yourdailyjormy]

yesterday i watched half a season of arcane back to back with my partner while having a breakdown

today i had a different kind of breakdown and attempted (with mixed results) to draw my partner in arcane style bc it's Real Pretty

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

.

[aflockofravens]

He wrapped his scarf around Miri like he did with the kitten in the first episode 😭😭😭

[masterwords]

11x16 - Derek

[20dollarlolita]

brb watching the people in charge of my local egl community continue to ask for more than two weeks to handle the loss of a loved one before they can go up to someone and say "we banned you for x", after forcing a 19-year-old to deal with these people creating the situation and specifically targeting her, less than an hour after said community member came down from a health episode that almost ended her life.

When someone demands a concession from you that they did not grant you, take note.

[kemendin]

Always cherished Never forgotten