#i'm curious though how does The Sign link back to Not Me

[proverbsss]

eating you right (father paul hill/john pruitt x reader) -nsfw

(pt. 2 of "reading you right" linked here)

Father Paul Hill, Midnight Mass

reader(s): I am not responsible for how you see your own headboard following the consumption of this fic <3

notifs: paul hill wants to worship you!! ; reader turns the tables for a subby paul; reader's still down HORRENDOUS ; cunnilingus, hierophilia

Your legs are unsteady as John leads you to his bedroom by your hand.

"Haha, look at Wobbles try and make their way down my hall," Paul teases.

"You edged me on your boot," you complain sharply, though this of course is tinged with pleasure and the hope that his treatment will continue. The muscles in your pelvic floor are on fire and your hips burn.

"Mmm, technically you edged you on my boot," he quibbles, pleased with himself, "Can you make it to the bed yourself?"

Rather than answer verbally, you turn back to look at him. It's a tart, cursing look that John meets with yet another grin. Even so, it's now you begin to notice the usual signs of how wrecked he is. You were so caught up in your own delicious torment that you failed to clock Paul mirroring it. You might some of your get your own back yet.

He's comfortable with your routine of the last few days, starting to strip out of his jeans when you say, "Wait." His doe eyes flick over to you, questioning.

"I don't know…" you pick your words carefully, the neediness of earlier converting itself into a sadistic little impulse to tease. "I don't know if we want your pants off yet, right?"

Paul stops a minute. Makes his positively adorable thinking face. There's a reset somewhere in his eyes as he works out why you might have said what you said.

"We don't..?" he repeats, uncertain.

"Nah," you throw out, dragging the tips of your fingers along the foot of the bed. If this duvet could talk, it would already have plenty dirty to say. "I think we probably want you to keep them on and sit first."

Paul clears his throat. His chin dips to his chest a little. Gears recalibrated toward submitting and taking orders fire fast behind those pretty eyes. "Okay, yes." He sits, trembling a bit, on the edge of the bed.

"I'm gonna sit next to you, Father, and you don't move for a little bit. Okay?"

He nods. Good enough for now. Your underwear clings wetly to you under the sleepshirt you were just hiking up for him in the living room. You pull the hem of the shirt down, a bit demurely over your thighs. Paul watches every move.

"Still don't move, baby." You purr at him. He preens silently at the pet name. "Close your eyes." When his eyes are closed, you take his face into both your hands, fingers grazing his ears, the peach fuzz of his tapered sideburns. In a decisive, hushed moment you bring Paul's face to yours and kiss him. Deeply. First-time tier kisses, slow and curious and just beginning to use your tongue.

Paul half-laughs, shyly against your mouth. "Still no moving," you remind into his lips, and he nods "good boy. Good Father." Oh, he likes that very much.

You lick his bottom lip and enthusiastically he opens his mouth to invite you closer, hands scrunching at his sides in desperation to follow your instruction and not not not touch you.

You withdraw from the kiss after another moment, riled yourself and needing to catch your breath. Still you have enough command of yourself to make this all about him, about how pathetic and needy and perfect he is. You bat your eyes at Paul and smile.

"You probably want to make it up to me. How badly you made me need you before,"

Paul tilts his head uncertainly from side to side. A smirk flickers at the corner of his mouth.

"You wanna know how to make me feel good after that, Paul? You wanna know what I need from you?"

He nods again, thoughts boyishly absent from his eyes, his demeanor relaxed and yet so, so ready to do what he's told.

"Can we make that a yes?" you prompt gently.

"Yes." The huskiness in his voice is like a refresher to your thirst for him. You tingle all over with anticipation.

"Good. I'm going to lay back, and I want you on top of me." As you lay down on the soft bedcovers, you realize all the tension your muscles held kneeling on the ground and fucking yourself onto him, even now some melts away and you sigh contentedly. Paul crawls over you, tenderness and want in his eyes and it calls up a smile to your lips.

"What are you smiling at?"

"My little pet priest. Bet he'd do anything I'd ask him."

Paul lays his head down on your belly, happiness going a little fuzzy because of the attention you show him. His curls call out to your hands and you play with his hair. He's radiant. And for now he's yours. He's kissing your neck now, giggling in the crook of your shoulder, lips tickling your chin, your cheek, your ears. You luxuriate in all this for a moment, then tell him, "Give me your ear please, I'm gonna whisper what I want."

His back muscles ripple like a cat's under his shirt as he makes the necessary adjustment to put his ear up to your mouth. But he's too close, too fucking perfect, so you have to bite his earlobe with such exquisite access.

He groans, tenses in his upper body, and rolls his hips over yours. "That's. Not whispering," he complains.

"Shh, shh." you tell him, "You wanna know? Really?" He cocks his head enough for you to see him nod, his length getting easier to feel against your thigh. You reach a hand up in his and gently bring his ear to your lips, "I need you to eat me out like your life depends on it."

He moans, low in his throat, at just the thought of that.

"You want to do that for me?" That serious attention is in his expression again as he nods at you, starting to kiss his way down your chest. "Can you tell me using your words that's something you want?"

In addition to teasing the everloving fuck out of him, getting his consent turns you on more than anything. The thought of Crockett Island's well-mannered, mildly twitchy new priest so eager to touch you, taste you, have you that he'd kept you in his quarters for the last two days reminds you in a heady rush.

"I…" he lifts his head from your chest and blinks, not reluctant, but so fucking needy, "I want to eat you out." He nods quickly, lashes dropping over his eyelids. "Like my life depends on it."

"Good boy. Do it then, please."

His beautiful, hot mouth begins an eager assault of kisses across your chest, migrating down your belly. You arch your back. Usually you two take a little more time here, but there isn't any to spare. So quickly, so deliberately, Paul finds your clothed sex. He wants to touch you, and he wants you telling him that he can.

"Can I take these off you? Please."

You have nothing smart to say. You're no less eager to feel his tongue, his kisses, the vibrations of his voice where you're most sensitive. You nod, and he holds his gaze to your eyes for a beat before pulling your useless underwear off your legs, discarding them on the floor.

You think without meaning to of the word 'devotion,' used in religious terms to describe a supplication, an adoring, faithful, upturned look. It applies equally to the naked need written on Paul's face with his hands carefully spreading your thighs apart.

"Please let m--" he swallows, begins again, "Please may I worship you?"

"Fuck, Paul, yes, please."

And he may have dedicated years to seminary study, he may have pored with his hands wrapped around old books of his faith and volunteered his body in the service of a Christian God, but that tongue of his was made for sinning.

He starts by kissing gently around your cunt, soft, spellbinding little pecks that make your body jerk to close your legs. You still open up for him, gasping and squeezing your eyes shut with how good, how good, how earth-shatteringly good he feels. His tongue starts to lap at your clit and you do feel yourself drip a bit as he deepens the kiss of his mouth on you. Your mind pleasantly lets go of so much residual tension, of today, of every day before this moment with Paul kitten-licking between your wet lips.

Your hips buck as he sucks a little more intently at your clit and your hands lift up and knot themselves up in his hair. He lives for it as you start to fuck his face.

"Yes, yes, salvation is your fucking cunt, thank you--" he sputters out, certainly only half aware of what he's saying but so, so pleased to look up at you and find your face entirely lost in what he's making you feel.

"Here, here," he takes one hand that's left a few fingernail marks in your thigh and hurriedly covers the knuckles of your hand that's controlling his head, "Put me where you want me. Use me, please."

His mouth and your cunt make an obscene symphony together as you moan and arch toward him, trying to win back enough self-control to direct him the way he needs. He's doing pretty goddamn well on his own, you think and laugh to yourself, your calves shaking and heels digging into the bed. His nose bumps an especially sensitive square inch toward the hood over your clit, and his tongue grazes the inside of you. You see stars, the way the old expression goes, you literally see stars. You have to fight to keep your eyes open to how beautifully looks, you'll need this memory of your pleasure, his pleasure, you and he together, for all time.

Your hips are bouncing off his face rather quick and desperately and Paul is drunk with chasing your cum. He sees you biting your fist and between kisses and sucks he has to ask, "You need more? What do you need? Tell me. I worship you. I deify you. I need this," And like a madman he shakes his head to deepen the stimulation of his tongue hitting, soothing, exciting your clit.

"Oh, Paul!" you cry out and reach for his bedframe. "Oh fuck," you're curling into him and keening and he's humping his mattress outright. "Finger me. Fuck please, give me something to-"

Something to cum around, of course. You feel slicker and sluttier than you've ever felt as Paul obediently probes a finger inside your cunt. You fuck his hand, unabashed, so far gone, so trembly. And even the trembling is helping you get more contact out of his tongue, and he's not tired, his thirst is unmatched, the hand not fingering you finds that little arch where his nose bumped up against you before and spreads you the littlest bit open to lap at your clit.

You make a sound that's kind of a shriek and kind of a delighted giggle, and words something like "Ha-fuck, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum on you--" fall out of your mouth. Paul moans, the pitch of his voice increasing in a way that sort of matches yours, nearly as desperate for your orgasm as you are. Nobody could be as desperate for this as you, however. No one in the history of fucking cumming has ever felt like this.

"Please," he sucks attentively at your clit and shakes his head again, a black curl plastered across his forehead, his gorgeous brown-green eyes searching you and seeing all of you, then closing again, a holy sight. "Please cum. That's it, please I want to drink you in, please--"

And your upper body accomodates for how powerfully you need to let go, the need for release screams out of your body and you almost hit the headboard, but Paul stops you, adjusts the hand that kept you exposed to him to grip your hip and pull you down to his mouth. Your body thrusts and bucks and arches of its own volition, you're just here, in this tear-you-apart pleasure of cumming on his tongue like no one's ever made you cum before. You're panting, your heart is racing, your blood is on fire.

"Enough-enough-enough fuck please---" you shake and beg and tug a little at his hair as he licks hungrily at you, but he's going to let you go when he's fully satisfied. Your voice continues to climb in whispers and shuddering gasps.

"Like my life," he makes a disgusting, gorgeous slurping noise over your wet needy hole, "depends on it." Like a man starved. Like a man crazed. How will you ever function again. You cry out as he drags his tongue up and down your slit, one last long articulation, before his hand finally relaxes on your hip.

Your eyes flutter as you remember suddenly to breathe, and Paul's hands glide up your leg as you sink them down back onto the bed.

"What did you just do to me?" You utter, mystifed, not fully with the thought as it escapes.

"You have no idea how intoxicating you are." He says, dead serious, if breathless and soaked in you. He sucks his middle finger clean. "None at all."

x

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[uconnposter01]

Warnings: Cursing

3.2K words

Me and You

Chapter 2

 February 2022  3rd person’s POV    

The last four months have been a blur for Aniyah.Between gymnastics and classes and friends, she truly loves college life.Currently Aniyah is getting ready to go to lunch with Nuveah, Paige and Azzi and she's running a bit behind.

“Mo-Mo are you ready yet?” Nuveah yells questions while walking in the Dorm apartment.

“What the fuck, you don't knock now? I could've been naked,”Jazmine says.

 The girl is sitting on the couch fully dressed so Nuveah isn't sure how she's in the wrong.

 “Don’t start with your bullshit, you know I have a key,and it would be weird for you to be butt ass naked in the living room ” Nuveah says walking up the steps before Jazmine responds.

“Mo-Mo are you ready?” Nuveah questions walking into Aniyah’s room. 

“No, I gotta finish my makeup” Aniyah says while doing her makeup.

“We’re going to AppleBees,” Nuveah says blankly.

“And?” Aniyah questions.

“Hurry up so I can go eat,I got the munchies”  Nuveah says, rubbing her stomach. 

“Imma be ready when I am, don't rush me” Aniyah says, rolling her eyes.

Nuveah doesn't respond, she just pulls out her phone to scroll through Tik Tok. She's excited, it's been a while since she’s hung out with Aniyah without Jazmine there and she couldn't wait. 

“Niyah can I borrow your tight black dress, I wanna make my sneaky link drool” Jazmine asks, opening the door and walking in.

“Sure” Aniyah responds without even looking up.

“Thanks girlie” Jazmine says, already going through Aniyah's closet.

“You got plans with your sneaky link?” Aniyah questions. 

“Supposed to,but she hasn't texted me back yet” Jazmine says frowning.

“Then why are you still looking for a dress?” Nuveah questions looking up.

“Because I want to, is that a fucking problem?” Jazmine asks, looking over Nuveah.

Aniyah frowns, not liking how Jazmine replies back to Nuveah. Jazmine may not like Nuveah but she is going to respect her sister.

“Jazmine chill out, you know how Nu talks, she didn't mean it that way” Aniyah says, cutting her eyes over at Jazmine.

“Yes she did, she's making fun of me Aniyah, why don't you ever say anything to Nu-Nu” Jazmine whines. 

It pisses Jazmine off so bad that Aniyah never says anything about Nuveah's tone or what she says. She doesn't care if Nuveah's tone is naturally monotone and she says things bluntly,Jazmine feels as though Nuveah hides behind that and uses it as a lame excuse.

“No I'm not, I'm genuinely curious” Nuveah says her tone laced with slight confusion.

“So I can look ready for her just in case she texts me back” Jazmine mumbles.

“But that's foolish,”Nuveah says.

“How?” Jazmine questions, rolling her eyes.

“You are getting all ready for this girl and she hasn't even texted you back yet” Nuveah says.

“I don't see your point” Jazmine says, her eyes narrowing.

“Imma keep it real with you ion think that girl likes you Jaz, you've been sleeping with her for almost two years and you haven't even met her team yet, shit you haven’t even met her friends it's like she's hiding you, and no one deserves that, you should drop that girl and find the right person for you” Nuveah says softly looking at Jazmine.

As much as Nuveah doesn't like Jazmine she sympathized with her situation, she's been in the same situation and it hurts and it's embarrassing. Nuveah just wants to save Jazmine before she has to experience the same type of hurt she did.

“No offense Nuveah but you don't know our dynamic, her team is just weird about meeting new people,and she gets super busy,my situation isn't anything like yours was”Jazmine says in a smug tone.

Nuveah doesn't respond but she does sigh. Maybe this would be the best for Jazmine since she's ignoring all warnings and signs. Her situation has nothing to do with Aniyah so Nuveah has no problem washing her hands of this.

“What shirt do you think I should put on?” Aniyah says holding up black and white baby tees.

“What bottoms are you choosing?” Nuveah asks.

“Probably these tan ones” Aniyah answers.

“White, it'll match with your Forces” Nuveah says, eyeing the options.

“Thanks Pook,” Aniyah says.

“Well shit” Jazmine says her once happy mood disappearing.

 “What's wrong?” Aniyah questions noticing Jazmine's mood change.

“My sneaky link said that we won't be meeting up” Jazmine says frowning.

“I’m sorry boo” Aniyah says sympathetically.

“Damn that's crazy” Nuveah says trying to hide her smile.

“It's fine” Jazmine says huffing and leaving her room.

“You ready yet Mo?” Nuveah questions starting to feel impatient.

“Yeah,I'm ready,” Aniyah says.

“Finally, I'm starving,” Nuveah complains.

“Stop bitching,” Aniyah says, sucking her teeth.

The duo both make their way out of the dorm and into Nuveah’s 2022 black Honda Civic.

“Hoe don't slam my car door, do that with your shit” Nuveah complains.

“Are you gonna be bitching all day?” Aniyah asks, rolling her eyes.

“We still here you can get out,” Nuveah says, raising her eyebrow.

Aniyah doesn't respond, she just grabs Nuveah's phone so she can turn on music.

“That's what I thought” Nuveah says smirking.

Nuveah reverses out of the parking lot and begins the 30 min drive to Applebees with a huge smile on her face. She's so excited to see Azzi, her crush on the girl has increased tenfold,and she really likes being around her. Nuveah isn't sure if she'll ever tell Azzi of her feelings but she won't ever pass up an opportunity to be near her.

“It’s so fucking cold in here” Aniyah shivers.

“Oh shit my bad” Nuveah said, turning on the heat.

“ Girl you are insane,” Aniyah said, pulling out her phone.

DaddyP💜🤤: I got a feeling u and Nu late cause of u

Read: 12:45 PM

                         Aniyah💚: ntm on me,I had to make sure I looked good

         Read: 12:46 pnlm

DaddyP💜🤤:  Im sure u do

                             Read: 12:47 pm

                                    Wya tho 

                                    Read: 12:48 pm

             

                          Aniyah 💚: like 10 mins away

                                                  Read: 12:49 pm

DaddyP💜🤤: bet

                          Read: 12:50 pm

Nuveah pulls into the Applebee's parking lot and quickly jumps out of her car. She couldn't hide her excitement,and she has the munchies and she gets to see Azzi  so she anxiously wants to get inside of the restaurant.

“Damn Pook slow down” Aniyah says trying to keep up with the soccer player.

“Can't I wanna see Azzi” Nuveah says, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Bye girl” Aniyah laughs.

The pair make it inside of the restaurant and out of the frigid Connecticut weather. The pair  both excitedly look around for the two basketball stars.

“Hello, can I help you two?” the hostess said as the pair approached.

“Hi yes, the other half of the Bueckers or Fudd party” Aniyah says.

“Okay, you two can follow me,” the hostess says, leading the duo to the two basketball players.

“Aye finally” Paige said with a goofy smile gracing her features.

It had been at least a week and a half since Paige saw Aniyah and seeing the girl after so long made Paige’s heartbeat fast and butterflies erupt in her stomach. It's a constant battle for her to not expose her true feelings for the girl, knowing that Aniyah doesn’t want anything serious. Paige admires her for being so upfront and honest with her about her situation with her ex. But sometimes Paige wishes they could be more.

“Nu sit next to me” Azzi requests softly.

Azzi hopes Nuveah realizes how much she likes soon.She’s dying to spoil and love on the girl.

 “Blame Aniyah, you know I don't like to be late” Nuveah says, slipping into the seat next to Azzi.

“Stop being a hater Pook, it's not cute” Aniyah says, rolling her eyes and sitting next to Paige.

Paige immediately places her hand on Aniyah's thigh like her hand belonged there.

“I missed you,” Paige softly says, glancing over at Aniyah.

“I missed you too,” Aniyah said, trying to hide her smile.

Paige smiles to herself as she sees how flustered she made Aniyah.Paige can't wait for the day she can call Aniyah hers. She's not sure when it'll or even if it will happen but for a chance at Aniyah's love she would wait for an eternity.

“Did y'all order yet?” Nuveah questions her eyes fixed on Azzi.

“No, we were trying to wait on you guys” Azzi replies.  

Nuveah doesn't respond though, she gets distracted by playing with Azzi’s fingers.Smiling Azzi intertwines their fingers winking at Nuveah in the process. Nuveah felt her heartbeat increase and her palms start to become sweaty. Licking her dry lips Nuveah studies Azzi’s side profile for a few seconds. Azzi’s beauty could rival Aphrodite’s in her humble opinion. She wishes she knew how Azzi felt about her; the Shooting Guard is naturally flirty, so she genuinely cannot tell if the girl is actually flirting with her or just being playful.

“Az” Nuveah says softly 

“Yeah pretty girl”? Azzi asks just as softly.

“Can you let my hand go?” Nuveah mumbles. 

“Oh my god, I'm so sorry ” Azzi says quickly, letting go of Nuveah’s hand. 

Azzi’s cheeks turned a light pink as embarrassment flowed throughout her body. Aniyah constantly tells her Nuveah likes her but Azzi genuinely can't tell. She constantly does things to show Nuveah that she likes her and the girl always subtly turns down her advances. Azzi knows she's oblivious but Nuveah isn't that unaware right?

                                   3 Musketeers

Azakins👹🩷 : are you sure nu likes me? 

                                          Read:1:20 pm

Buckets👱🏻‍♀️: nah fr she said gimme my hand back🤣🤣🤣

Read: 1:21 pm

Azakins👹🩷: do you wanna be blocked 🤨

                                          Read: 1:22 pm

Buckets👱🏻‍♀️: chill and u kno how Nu is she prolly don't realize u gotta just tell her that shit she wont know how u feel til u make that first move

                                          Read: 1:24 pm

Azakins👹🩷: I just made the first move

                                                Read: 1:26 PM

Buckets👱🏻‍♀️: u didnt tell her tho

                                        Read: 1:26 PM

                       Nu is slow as hell too she prolly aint   know what u was doing fr fr

           Read: 1:27 pm

                                        

                       Puerto Rican Princess 🇵🇷: imma have  to stop you right there at least Nu can read 💅🏾  

                                                Read: 1:28 pm

 but yes boo she likes you so much her hand probably got sweaty we know how Nu is about her  hands being sweaty        

           Read: 1:29 pm

Buckets👱🏻‍♀️:  dont start wit me Niyah I will blow ya back out after we leave here                          

             Read: 1:31 pm

                  Puerto Rican Princess 🇵🇷: prove it 😁

                                                              Read: 1:32 pm

Buckets 👱🏻‍♀️: Bet 

                    Read: 1:33 pm

Azakins👹🩷: take this freaky ass shit somewhere else my virgin eyes cannot handle this

                          Read: 1:34 pm

Nuveah steals quick glances at Azzi hoping she didn't make the girl upset, Azzi's been looking at her phone since Nuveah asked for her to let go of her hand,and she's really worried she upset her in some way. Which wasn't her intention, her hand was getting extremely sweaty and she was anxious Azzi would feel how gross it was getting. Nuveah then glances at Aniyah hoping she could give her some type of cue like she usually does but she's also on her phone smiling.Nuveah can feel the anxiety creeping into her brain. Not wanting to kill the vibe for everyone else, Nuveah decides it's best that she deals with this anxiety by herself.

“Imma be right back” Nuveah says slipping out of the booth.

“You okay?” Azzi questions softly, concern etched on her face.

“Yeah, I just left something in my car” Nuveah mumbles while walking out of the restaurant.

Slamming her car door, Nuveah sighed. Opening her glove box she pulled out her weed pen and took a couple of hits. Nuveah felt her anxiety melt away, she wishes she had the confidence to tell Azzi she likes her,but she knows she never will say anything about her feelings.Maybe she should just let the idea of being with Azzi go.

                         20 minutes later

“How long has Nu been outside?” Azzi questions.

“I don't know, but it's been a minute though” Paige replies not looking up from her phone.

“The food is gonna be here soon” Aniyah says, glancing at the door.

Azzi eyes shoot up from her phone to look over at the pair. Between conversations and ordering her’s  and Nuveah's food, she didn't realize how much time had actually passed by.

“Imma go check on her” Aniyah announces standing up 

“Wait Niyah, let me do it,” Azzi says, also standing up.

“Okay” Aniyah says, winking at Azzi.

Azzi smiles at Aniyah and then makes the walk to Nuveah's car. She is determined to get to the bottom of what had upset Nuveah.

“You okay ma?” Paige questions looking over at Aniyah. 

“I’m good, you good P?”Aniyah asks.

“ I’m chilling,” Paige says, her voice low and husky.

“You tryna chill after this?” Aniyah inquires.

“Of course, I wanna blow ya back out” Paige states her eyes tracing Aniyah's body hungrily.

“You will baby, I promise” Aniyah says, booping Paige’s nose.

“Gimme kiss,” Paige demands softly.

Aniyah quickly looked around the area of the restaurant seeing that it was pretty empty in the area. Leaving over Aniyah presses a soft short peck to Paige's lips.

“Ma that was not a kiss, stop playing and gimme a real one” Paige whines.

Aniyah leans over once more and presses her lips firmly on Paige’s lips. The point guard's hands immediately grip Aniyah’s waist trying to subtly pull her closer. Breaking the kiss Aniyah rests her forehead on Paige's, placing a gentle peck on her lips.

“You so pretty ma” Paige mumbles, her lips ghosting over Aniyah’s.

“Not prettier than you” Aniyah says 

“Thank you” Paige says, smiling a blush rapidly spreading across her cheeks.

“Before I forget,Lou is coming up for my birthday, I want you to meet her,” Aniyah says softly.

Paige couldn’t stop her smile from fading ever so slightly. She really  doesn’t want to meet Lou. She actually was hoping that this day would never come. Paige sees Lou as a rival, the biggest hurdle in her way.She’s slowly but assuredly falling for Aniyah and Lou still being as constant as she is in Aniyah's life puts her plans on a permanent hiatus. 

“Okay, I got no problem with that ma,” Paige says, a fake smile gracing her features.

“Thank you P, you both are very important to me, so I just want y'all to be able to finally meet and not just hear me talking about the both of you to each other” Aniyah rambles.

“I’ll do whatever makes you happy,” Paige admits.

Aniyah looks over at Paige to find the blond already looking at her, her eyes filled with desire and admiration.

“So I have the Blackened Cajun Salmon, Bourbon Street Steak, Chicken Alfredo and finally the Chicken Fajita Rollup” Their waitress Stephanie says breaking the intense eye contact between the pair. 

 “Thank you” Aniyah says, smiling at the waitress.

“Imma text Azzi” Paige mutters softly.

 “Okay” Aniyah responds, pulling out her phone.

LouLou🤗: have fun IG 🙄

                     Read:1:00 pm

                      You still wit white girl 

                      Read: 2:10 pm

                                Favorite ex 🫶🏽: Yeah

                                                             Read: 2:15 pm

LouLou🤗: why u being so dry

                               Read: 2:16 pm

                                 

                   Favorite ex 🫶🏽: cause I'm out to dinner don't start Lou 

Read: 2:17 pm

LouLou🤗: Im not I just asked why I were being dry

                                                Read: 2:18 pm

                     Did u tell white girl i wanna meet her

                                                Read: 2:19 PM

        Favorite ex 🫶🏽:yeah she cool with it 

                                           Read:2:20 PM

“Sorry, we were talking,” Azzi says, slipping into the booth.

Aniyah looks over at Nuveah seeing her eyes slightly glazed over and red. 

“Did you save us some weed?” Aniyah questions teasing the pair.

“Yeah” Nuveah replies while eating her Salmon.

“Girl quit lying” Aniyah says playfully, rolling her eyes.

“Can I have some of your wrap things?” Nuveah questions softly. 

“Of course, pretty girl,” Azzi says, letting Nuveah take a piece of her food.

“Damn Pook, you hungry” Aniyah teases.

Nuveah doesn’t respond, she just eyes Aniyah’s food wondering if she would be able to steal some of the Chicken Alfredo from the girl. Quickly noticing how her sister is eyeing her food Aniyah rolls her eyes and puts a little on her sister's plate. 

“Here girl” Aniyah says, sucking her teeth.

“Thanks Mo-Mo, how'd you know I wanted some?” Nuveah questions.

“Your greedy ass was eyeing my plate” Aniyah replies, rolling her eyes.

Laughter and conversation filled the table as the Quartet enjoyed their time together. Being with Azzi makes Nuveah crave more from the girl and she hates it. Her hand is itching to be able to rest on Azzi's thigh, or to just lean over and whisper sweet nothings in the girl's ear. 

“You okay?” Azzi questions softly quickly, noticing Nuveah’s mood change slightly.

“Yeah, I'm low-key ready to go,” Nuveah says.

“Not gonna lie me too, I'm ready for my dessert”  Paige says while eyeing Aniyah hungrily.

“Y'all are nasty” Nuveah says, her nose scrunching in disgust.

“Stop hating Pook” Aniyah says with a smile gracing her features.

Azzi glances over at Nuveah wondering if the girl would come back to her dorm with her. The Shooting Guard is enjoying her time with the Soccer player and she really doesn't want it to end so soon.

“Nu, are you doing anything else today?” Azzi asks 

“Nah, I was probably just gonna play Far Cry 5 and eat a edible” Nuveah says.

“Do you want to do that in my dorm?” Azzi asks.

“Not really” Nuveah bluntly says.

Hearing Nuveah's response made Azzi feel rejected. The thought of no longer pursuing the girl crosses Azzi’s mind, Nuveah is clearly showing that she doesn't see Azzi that way and it hurts so much.

“I'm a bit overstimulated, so I really just want to be in my dorm, you can come over to my place if that's cool with you”Nuveah says after a brief second.

“I would love to,” Azzi says, smiling widely.

“Is it cool if I come to your dorm?” Paige mutters to Aniyah. 

“Lemme text my roommate” Aniyah says

NiyahTheBestRoomie: do u mind if I bring someone home

Read: 3:02 pm

                           Jazzypoo:yeah, that's fine I won't be home for a couple of hours anyway, I'm trying to make my sneaky link jealous

                  Read: 3:04 pm

NiyahTheBestRoomie: how you gonna do that

Read: 3:05 pm

          Jazzypoo: I'm gonna go fuck this girl and send it to her 

         Read: 3:06 pm

NiyahTheBestRoomie: good luck

                                         Read: 3:07 pm

“Yeah you can come over, she’s gonna be out for a while” Aniyah responds looking over at the blond.

“Bet” Paige says smirking.

Paige pays for the lunch before anyone else could even attempt to. Feeling proud of herself Paige loks over at Aniyah subtly letting the girl know she's ready to leave. 

“You ready ma” Paige questions looking over at Aniyah 

“Yeah” Aniyah says standing up.

“Aight, we heading out see you” Paige says, leading Aniyah to her Jeep.

----------------------------------------------------------

An: Thank you for reading I hope ya'll have a good day ❤️

Criticism and feedback welcomed

[oskidontle]

holy heifer I have so many questions about your hungry smilers au, I love it so much. Do some of the properties or effects last even after the hunt is over (like how Alan gets back/neck pains)? Do the others know of Pim’s mild resistance to The Hunger? When in the hunt are they aiming to eat or just kill the victim? What about the boss? Is he aware of what’s going on? Is it affecting him? Is he ever curious as to why the smiling friends are acting different or does he ignore it? You said Pim is fully aware of what goes down but what about the others? Is it more awareness for some of them and less for others? How do Pim’s claws work? Ohhhh there is just so much to ponder about with your au it’s soooo goooood

OG AU Post for those confused

I'm glad you're enjoying my lil AU so far! You got a lotta questions and I got a lot of answers let's go!

1:

The hunger is a stubborn and impulsive state. It tends to "leak" out when not on a hunt. Particularly if they've gone without eating for awhile. If hungry it can be difficult to keep from showing signs that something is amiss. Subtle stuff out first: twitchiness, trouble focusing, mood swings... But as time goes on it becomes harder to hide: Constant smiling, extreme impulsivity(lashing out), urges to eat being nearly impossible to resist. If they can't keep it together enough to do their job without being noticed they usually stay back at the office while one of the others takes their place for that hunt.

If they are fed though they remain in proper control of themselves but cannot control of they change forms or not. Little bits of their other forms are still a constant though.

Allan, as stated goes through a lot of neck and back pain, his proportions are never quite right. It's very subtle but his neck still stretches instinctively.

Charlie gets pounding headaches and his tounge is still two. If he coughs hard enough he could accidentally spit a couple drops of acid.

Glep still has small fangs when he opens his mouth.

Pim usually gets sore all throughout his chest and back. A physical giveaway is the permanent black splotches that line his back from below the neck to the base of the spine.

2:

Yes they are aware. It almost costs them hunts sometimes. The only reason he can even begin to fight it is because he starves himself of flesh often and it has trained him to resist The Hunger. Granted it's not much but that moment of resistance he can give could mean life or death for the victim.

3:

When on a hunt the overall goal is to feed. Depending on how ravenous The Hunger is that day, they'll eat till satisfied and that's when they regain control or they will be able to regain control long enough to bring the body back for the whole office to share.

4:

Ohohoho see I've thought long and hard about this since the beginning. Excuse me being a little cryptic up ahead here because I think leaving things up for others to theorize is fun.

What I WILL reveal is Mr.Boss knows more than he lets on. In fact he is the reason The Hunger is such a thing. He's not afflicted by it himself but he has his own motives for causing it. As I told one of my friends before metaphorically Mr.Boss is playing chess and the Smiling Friends are just his pawns in a bigger picture.

Now I'll add to the answer with more questions for you to think about. Why have they never been caught by authorities nor even questioned when the killings so clearly all link to the Smiling Friends company. Why does the media never seem to report on these killings? Why are there never any police records kept accurate? (Files mislabeled as perpetrator unknown or missing persons)

5:

Pim has a slightly higher level of awareness as the others. What makes him notable the fact he can use that awareness to, like previously stated, hesitate against The Hungers will somewhat. Either way to all of them it's like looking through foggy glass mentally. It can be a bit hard for them to tell what's going on and they have to make an active effort to clear the brain fog. Sometimes it's easier to let the mental fog do it's thing though, at least they won't have to think about the life they just took.

6:

Pims extra limbs form from a thick substance that oozes out of patches on his back. This substance shapes itself and rematerializes to match his true arms as much as possible. This is highly imperfect though. As you've probably noticed, the extra arms all bend in unusual ways. Too many joints, imperfect joints.

Because of the substance they were made out of they can stretch or rematerialize partially on the fingers. This is the premise for his claws. All that needs to happen is some reorganizing on a molecular level and suddenly those claws are harder than and sharper than a razor. The claws can rematerialize back into normal looking hands as well depending on the nessisary situation. It is of note though his true limbs cannot do any of that.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Do drow have an equivalent of elven communion? I know they've got the chad-zak during pregnancy, but I was curious if there was anything outside that.

Ah, the question that plagues me. I personally know of no equivalent, and they certainly don't do regular communion. What I do wonder is if it's that they can't or don't. I don't have an answer for that, but I can babble and quote things to consider, I guess. First the 'short' answer:

I swear I've seen a High Magic ritual that can lift the banishment on a drow, though I can't seem to find it flipping through the sourcebooks (maybe I'm looking in the wrong one?) and turning an elf into a drow via high magic has been done three times since as a form of exile, which suggests the Descent locked them out. On the other hand, some drow can reverie, which suggests that the capability for communion is in there still.

On the topic of equivalents: drow apparently have a form of High Magic, although I don't really know anything about it so I'm not sure it utilises a form of communion the way regular High Magic does. It's also not an indication that drow normally experience an equivalent. If the chad-zak exists in realmslore then it might be a sign of some kind of twisted communion made by Lolth (it has been said that Corellon tied the dark elves' fate to her by making her the dark elven goddess of destiny back when she was called Araushnee, perhaps that formed a bond to her the way elves are normally tied to him). On the other hand it might just be unique exception like a half-elf being able to commune with a human child; a connection normally impossible but present due to the physical symbiosis.

And then me babbling about what communion and the bindings of the elven spirit is for anybody who doesn't know the details, with a side about how generic DnD lore isn't 100% reflective of what realmslore is:

Elves seem to have some sort of mental link between them [... allowing] another elf to project his mind into another's and the two share thoughts on some level. The closeness of elven communities comes from this habitual sharings of minds, and the elves do not understand other races without this ability, for they cannot conceive of being totally alone in one's own head. Apparently, elves look forward to sharing their thoughts with others and do it either directly or in "reverie" - Cormanthyr: Empire of the Elves

Communion's a tricky thing, considering it was introduced in the Complete Book of Elves which is... uh, infamous for being the Complete Book of Elves. Still, communion made it into published Realms canon so it is canon and the stuff it says somewhat relevant. Worth noting that the former states half-elves can't enter communion, but then Ed Greenwood goes 'nope, they can.' Technically dnd rules do kind of support that since a half-elf counts as an elf for magical conditions that specify elves. Then, again, dnd canon has said that half-elves will only ever produce half-elven or human offspring and realmslore canonically said, multiple times, 'nah, a half-elf and an elf make an elf, actually.' Plus the thing with child names where an elf isn't named and picks a name as an adult (this custom fell out of use with the Tel'Quessir long ago, it was antiquated back in the times of Myth Drannor when Khelben Arunsun's dad pulled it out and decided he could name himself. Nowadays your parent gives you a name at birth).

As usual, what generic DnD might say about things doesn't necessarily apply to a specific DnD setting. As such I'm not sure the foetal murder orgasms exist in realmslore either, but who knows.

Negative feelings and isolation damage an elf's ability to commune, as Araushnee herself discovered when Malar had to tell her there were elves on a particular world because she was slowly poisoning her own spirit and couldn't feel her own people anymore. Not that murder and scheming and hating has stopped surface elves from being capable of it, but the deliberate attack on the dark elven mental health and sense of community ingrained on them from birth by Lolth is built to cut them off like her.

Corruptive forces also cut elves off from their elfiness. Such as Shadow Magic did to the elf Galaeron Nihmedu, taking his ability to reverie or sense the bonds between himself and his family. I suspect the Faerzress, Lolth's divine magic, fucking around with demons and such, plus the fact that Vhaeraunites utilise shadow magic can have a similar effect, and in total the dark elves feel like this to other elves (and probably each other):

“I want only to be certain this one is who he claims. There is a darkness in him I do not trust, and I would know if you will vouchsafe his conduct, and that of his friends.” The light faded from Morgwais’s face. “A darkness, you say?” She took Galaeron’s hand, then looked past his shoulder. Her gaze grew unfocused, as it would during the Reverie, and a single furrow appeared in her unblemished brow. She remained that way for several moments, then finally opened her eyes and nodded. “It’s true. You seem lost to me, child. It is as though you are…” She started to look away as though embarrassed, then hesitated and forced herself to look back. “It feels as though you are asleep.” 'The comment struck Galaeron like a blow, and he realized with a start that he did not feel the other elves either. The absence had seemed normal enough during his travels with the humans, especially given his trouble falling into the Reverie, but he should have sensed other elves as they traveled deeper into the High Forest. Instead, there had been nothing - no sense of welcome, no warmth, no safety. He had felt nothing - nothing but the anger and jealousy he had experienced upon seeing his mother on Elminster’s lap.' - The Summoning

Green elven polyamory aside, taking it personally when your mother is banging Elminster instead of your father isn't worthwhile. Just Elminster doing Elminster things.

(Slightly off topic, but this is also why I'm sceptical Astarion can still commune, since undeath almost certainly qualifies as corruptive dark magics.)

Off the bat, most drow are not going to be able to pull this off. It has benefits that would be useful (enough communing forges a bond between elves, allowing them such an unspoken understanding of each other to fight in perfect synch, and while communing elves are difficult to discover if you're looking for them). But they're too stressed to accomplish reverie they're certainly not going to accomplish this:

'All elves have the inborn ability to share their experiences, their feelings, and their lives with those elves they love or trust implicitly. This sharing, called communion, can only be undertaken by fully willing elves.' [Even the slightest hint of reluctance makes communion impossible.] 'Communion requires all elves involved (to a maximum of four) to be in a state of total relaxation. They must be in a place of peace, preferably where the world is not likely to intrude with its troubles and its cares. A natural surrounding works best for this operation. 'Communion requires the participating elves to be totally serene, thinking only of the others in this most intimate bond. (Thus, communion is not an effective method of relaying messages of any urgency.) All the elves must free themselves of judgments and prejudices about the others, which may take some time. Indeed, some communions have been known to take a fortnight or more merely in preparation for the bonding. 'When the participants have sufficiently calmed and retreated from the rigors of the world, they lightly touch palm to palm, finger to finger. They open their minds to the others, freely and completely joining together; if even a tiny reservation remains, the bond fails. During communion, the elves explore all the facets of the others' personality—the loves, hatreds, hopes, and fears. 'While in this trance, communing elves are totally vulnerable to anything that might happen to them physically for they cannot defend themselves against any attacks while communing. Mentally they are even more vulnerable to attack, saving at -4 against most mental attacks, for their minds are totally unguarded.' - The Complete Book of Elves

Lolth works hard at beating this wishy-washy stuff out of you.

I like to think they're capable of communing when they're safe and healthy, personally.

[hellhound5925]

One shot (that isn’t really a one shot) - Sargent Hunter

Warnings:

18+, It’s filth so enjoy accordingly. Dark smut? Mentions of being a victim.

Masquerade (Part Three)

Summary:

Wrapping up the night of her dreams Circe rides into night her knight in shining armor. Not much else to say about this one.

Thank you to my girlies for their help as usual 💖 Part Two linked here and Part One is linked in the second one.

Reminder: Dance Macabre by Ghost was the original inspo but now I’m feeling a little Hunters Moon and you’ll see why.

After being dragged out onto the street, Hunter stops for a moment and looks around.

"Whats the matter? Get a little lost?" I tease. He gives me a sided eye glare and huffs a sigh. An idea hits and I start to take me heels off.

"What are you doing?" confusion laced in his words.

"I can move faster without them and besides...." I grunt struggling to pull off the second one. "They aren't that comfortable" the shoe finally frees itself from my foot almost sending me tumbling over. Two strong arms catch me before I can actually fall. Hunters face is only inches from mine, his breath fans over my face.

"Thanks" I say under my breath. My eyes wonder his face, tracing the skull tattoo before stopping at his lips. At this distance it wouldn't take much to reach...

He lets go and we both collect ourselves for a moment. Taking the mask off my face, I gather my things into one hand before grabbing my dress with the other. I start walking off in one direction and realize he isn't following me.

"Are you coming?" I sass not really meaning to. Hunter hesitates for a moment before joining me.

Feeling bad for him I decide to make conversation "This must be a lot for you. All the noise...your senses are probably working overtime."

He signs and looks down at his feet before responding, "Sometimes it can be, yeah."

Letting go of my dress, I take his hand. "Well don't worry. Where we are going, it'll be quiet. Promise."

When he looks at me his eyes seem to sparkle under the walkway lighting. He gives my hand a light squeeze and my heart skips a beat.

We stroll for a while and make small talk to get to know each other more. I've interacted with him a few times before but solely on a professional level, things never got personal. The one thing I notice is he only seems to talk about his brothers...the other members of Clone Force 99.

"What about you though? You talk about your brothers so much. What about you?" I prod him a little hoping he will give me more.

"What do you mean?"

The clones have done so much for this galaxy whether they wanted to or not, the Sargent...a man...deserves at to want. I sigh trying to figure out how to word it, "I mean what does Sargent Hunter want?"

He thinks for a moment, "I've never really thought about that. We were bred for war and my job is to protect my men. That's all I know."

We walk in silence until we reach my apartment building. I take him up to the roof where its nice and quiet as promised. He follows me over to a small table with two chairs.

"I put this up here when I moved in. I like how quiet it is." I explain, setting my things on the table before sitting down. Hunter sits in the chair across from me, staring at the ground deep in thought.

"Everything okay Sargent?" I try to lighten the mood. "If it's something I've said, I'm sorry. I mean no offense but just curious is all."

He still doesn't look at me which worries me more, the war between his feelings - one he probably never thought existed - was written all over his face. Feeling like I ruined everything, I get down on ground in front of him and rest my hands on his knee, looking up at him. At this point he's forced to look at me and his expression changes back to the unwavering confidence of a Sargent. 

"You" he says like he's giving his men an order.

I'm even more confused, "Me, what?"

"I want you" the words fall from his lips and hit me square in the face. My heart begins to race and heat pooling in my core, as a smile spreads across his face. His words ring in my ears as I process the fact that this is really happening.

The moonlight bathing us in its bewitching glow, this moment is too perfect. It's everything a girl could have ever dreamed. The two of us sitting on the roof top staring into one another eyes and in this moment thats the only thing the matters. I reach for his face, the stubble a welcomed sensation under my palm.

"Then you'll have me."

Before I can even process whats happening his lips are crashing into mine, they are softer than I'd imagined. His tongue begs for entrance to my mouth and I welcome it with my own. The taste of him like a divine revelation, a start of a new chapter for both of us. Pulling me onto his lap, the warmth of his arms sending a rush of excitement through my veins. I make myself comfortable pressed completely against him, forcing him to lean back in the chair. His arousal makes itself known between my legs, creating a new desperation. I deepen the kiss to prevent a sound from escaping.

We break, foreheads pressed together and both panting from the lack of oxygen. My eyes flick down to his lips, they are stained with my lip stick. Huffing a small laugh, I lean back. Confusion plastered all over Hunters face, until I notice him look at my lips. Reaching up he gently, runs a thumb around the edge of my lips - probably from smeared lip stick. His hands return to their place on my hips. I take the time to delicately return the favor and watch as his facial expression turns to one of a starved man.

Leaning in, I kiss his neck which causes his chest to rumble with a low growl. I make my way back up to his ear and whisper,

"Make me yours."

His breath hitches in this throat, he's a complete mess like I was earlier in the night. "Are you sure?" He asks between heavy breaths.

Dragging my nose across his cheek - making sure to take my time - both hands firmly on his chest. Slowly I trail both hands down his torso, he inhales sharply and I can't help the lusty chuckle that graces us with its presence.

"I'm sure"

My hands find their way down to his waist, undoing his belt and carefully undoing his dress pants. The entire time neither of us dares break eye contact. He takes care, to adjust my dress in a such a way to not ruin it but allow him access to my center. One of his hands makes it was up to my shoulder gently tracing over my collarbone in such a way that I close my eyes in anguish. His other hand, tails up one of my tights before his fingers skillfully make themselves at home in my core.

Suddenly having removed his hand, I whimper at the cold. He adjusts himself before grabbing my hips and burying himself as far as he can inside me. I let out a sharp gasp and reach behind me squeezing what I can grab of his thighs, throwing my head back. Hunter lets out a deep lusty grunt that sends a wave of vibrations through him into me. Never in a million rotations could I have imagined the rapturous delight that flowed through my body at the hands of a man.

I’m so close to the edge, his slow and steady movements are almost painful. Throwing my arms around his shoulders pressing myself back into him and taking over. His hands slide down my hips to my thighs, grip tightening as he takes back control.

"Easy Meshl'a...I'm going to....m-make you mine" he grunts pulling me closer kissing and nipping at my collar bone. As he makes his way up my neck, to the spot behind my ear I can feel the marks starting to form.

Both of us so caught up in the moment that seems to end too soon. The two of us sit in silence, unmoving for a moment. I look up at the sky and notice the stars and moon are willing themselves to peer through the foggy sky. Hunter doesn't take his eyes off me, I can practically feel it.

The feeling of finally giving in and having had a sweet taste of intimacy with one another lingers. Covered in a thin layer of sweat and arousal, I’m left panting and heart beating so fast that it feels as though it might leap from my chest. Peaking together in our shared extract felt like a drug. I craved more… no I needed more. More touch, more kissing, more lust… It was the reward of my longing.

I meet his greedy gaze, greedy for me. Not being able to hold back any longer, the kissing and touching begin once again. Our cloths from the evening hurriedly piled on the ground. It all happened to fast, the cool night air was quite a surprise to my bare skin.

He effortlessly, stands from the chair with me still in his lap and places me on the table. I wrap my legs around his waist, trapping him there. Without much warning, he once again buries himself in my center, his thrusts into me hard and fast. I feel every inch of this mammoth size, making every part of me his. This time was different…this time it was selfish, greedy, and feral.

"You smell so incredibly mouth-watering when you're aroused" he grunts between pants and moans.

For a moment I find myself unable to speak, a response is on the tip of my tongue, yet I swallow it, far too engrossed in pure pleasure he sends burning through my veins. Hunters gaze glides over my body, hot and demanding, his hand grips my chin before his tongue again dominates your mouth, each velvety collision sends explosive fireworks racing through your body. He lets go of me for a brief moment taking a deep breath expelling it as his eyes meet mine, his pupils dilated to the point they resemble an animal with its prey in sight.

"Hu... oh Hunter" I cry out like the hopeless victim.

My whole abdomen trembles as his pace becomes more brutal, the intense feeling of being so close to our peaks is almost too much. Hunter rails into my dripping wet opening greedily my lust filled cries only encourage him. Inhailing our scents deeply, he closes his eyes briefly and lets out an animalistic groan.

“Fuck mesh'la, You feel so good around me."

I feel his pelvis slap harshly against me again and again, naked skin against naked skin, a glistening layer of salty sweat coats our skin.  The speed he fucks me at, his regal voice send my body over the edge, I come undone for him, coating this throbbing cock in my juices. Pure white hot liquid pleasure surges through my veins, my vision clouded with all the stars in the galaxy. I shake and shudder underneath him moaning and cursing in my native tongue.

"Hunter!...Osi’kyr (Oh shit)!"

I feel the force of his blaster calloused hands grip down onto my hips once again, knowing I will be bruised from this encounter. He half swallows a moan as his pace now becoming irregular, the base of his cock swelling inside of me smacking against my cervix. Every nerve ending in my body feels on fire. My sounds are not my own as he finally spills his warm seed inside of me, we grip onto each other as he fucks me savagely through our highs. Seeing the Sargent fall apart like that for me was completely exquisite.

Hunter rasped a breathy moan as he softened inside me pulling out slowly, once more he presses his forehead to mine nuzzling my face and kissed me sweetly on my temple.

“Now you’re mine” he whispers between panted breaths.

Taglist: @cloneloverrrrr @lune-de-miel-au-paradis @idoubleswearimawriter

@savebytheodore @savebytheodoresnonjosestuff @jediknightjana @techs-goggles9902 @clonethirstingisreal

[iviarellereads]

The Eye of the World, Prologue - Dragonmount

(THIS PROJECT IS SPOILER FREE! No spoilers past the chapter you click on. Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For the link index and a primer on The Wheel of Time, read this one! Like what you see? Send me a Ko-Fi.)

(Wheel icon)(1) In which you're right to be confused.

Sit down, relax, have a sip of tea, open the book: everyone is dead, and the architecture distorted from the flawed magic that killed them in myriad unpleasant ways.(2)

And then Lews Therin Telamon calls out for his wife. He's quite oblivious to the destruction around him, unable to see the woman laying dead, her final expression one of disbelief,(3) at his feet as he calls her name.

For a moment he fingered the symbol on his cloak, a circle half white and half black, the colors separated by a sinuous line. It meant something, that symbol.(4)

But he's easily distracted, here, now, until an old acquaintance comes calling, appearing out of the air in thigh high boots with silver trim the fandom still makes fun of when we reread this and remember. LTT doesn't remember him, though, only asks if he'd like to help with the Singing that will happen soon.(5)

"Shai'tan take you, does the taint already have you so far in its grip?"(6)

The stranger's name was once Elan Morin Tedronai, we don't get his current one, only a nickname: the Betrayer of Hope. LTT is known as the Dragon, and now Kinslayer. He's so far gone, he barely remembers that Shai'tan is a name that should never be spoken. It would seem that he, in his tainted madness, killed his own castle. His own home. His own wife. The Betrayer of Hope names a bunch of titles LTT once held, and is frustrated that now he's so much more powerful than LTT, and LTT has forgotten it all, forgotten him, all but forgotten reality itself.

The BOH says he won't let LTT die without recognizing how far he's fallen, and it's unfortunate that one of the Sisters isn't here, for he never had much skill with Healing,(7) and he uses a different power now.(8) And then, using some kind of magic that darkens the room, he heals LTT's mind.

Pain blazed in Lews Therin, and he screamed, a scream that came from his depths, a scream he could not stop. […] Slowly, ever so slowly, the pain receded. […] His eyes fell on the golden-haired woman, and the scream that was ripped out of him dwarfed every sound he had made before.

He crawls to her, screaming and weeping. BOH promises, he could have her back if he turned to the dark, even now. But, LTT remembers, now, that BOH's "foul master" has racked the world for ten years.

"This war has not lasted ten years, but since the beginning of time. You and I have fought a thousand battles with the turning of the Wheel, a thousand times a thousand, and we will fight until time dies and the Shadow is triumphant!"(9)

LTT swears vengeance for Ilyena, but BOH reminds him who led a futile attack that tainted male magic and drove all male channelers mad, and who killed everyone in this castle. LTT howls again, and in his grief, can't bear to stay in his home.

Desperately he reached out to the True Source, to tainted saidin, and he Traveled.(10)

He lands in a vast plain, near a river, and can sense that there are no people for hundreds of leagues.

He was still touching saidin, the male half of the power that drove the universe, that turned the Wheel of Time, and he could feel the oily taint fouling its surface, the taint of the Shadow's counterstroke, the taint that doomed the world. Because of him. Because in his pride he had believed that men could match the Creator[.](11)

He channels more than any one person can bear, begging the Light's forgiveness, and creates a massive volcano that just keeps growing.

At last the wind died, the earth stilled to trembling mutters. Of Lews Therin Telamon, no sign remained. Where he had stood a mountain now rose miles into the sky, molten lava still gushing from its broken peak. The broad, straight river had been pushed into a curve away from the mountain, and there it split to form a long island in its midst. The shadow of the mountain almost reached the island; it lay dark across the land like the ominous hand of prophecy.(12)

BOH watches from some distance, saying LTT can't escape that easily, then disappears. Then two fragments of in-world texts, prophecies about the Dragon being reborn.

And the Shadow fell upon the Land, and the World was riven stone from stone. The oceans fled, and the mountains were swallowed up, and the nations were scattered to the eight corners of the World. The moon was as blood, and the sun was as ashes. The seas boiled, and the living envied the dead. All was shattered, and all but memory lost, and one memory above all others, of him who brought the Shadow and the Breaking of the World. And him they named Dragon.(13) (From Aleth nin Taerin alta Camora, The Breaking of the World. Author unknown, the Fourth Age) And it came to pass in those days, as it had come before and would come again, that the Dark lay heavy on the land and weighed down the hearts of men, and the green things failed, and hope died. And men cried out to the Creator, saying, O Light of the Heavens, Light of the World, let the Promised One be born of the mountain,(14) according to the prophecies, as he was in ages past and will be in ages to come. Let the Prince of the Morning sing to the land that green things will grow and the valleys give forth lambs. Let the arm of the Lord of the Dawn shelter us from the Dark, and the great sword of justice defend us.(15) Let the Dragon ride again on the winds of time. (From Charal Drianaan te Calamon, The Cycle of the Dragon. Author unknown, the Fourth Age)(16)

=====

(1) Yep, this is the titular wheel itself. I will list the icons on all chapters, particularly because the audiobook readers don't get any indication they exist, but I'm not going to try to post an image of each one every time it comes up. If you don't mind a list that gives away a few concepts that come up through the series, this page has all the images and a one or two word descriptor for each, without giving away where or how many times they're used going forward. I think they're a really interesting little game: what does each chapter icon mean, who or what does it refer to in the world, what might you be able to learn about the meaning of a chapter from the icon? Not necessarily for this one, but keep it in mind, and I might give it away for each one when it becomes clear what it's meant to be. (2) I believe it's fair to tell you it was magic, considering the detail in the introductory paragraph. Lightning down corridors, flames that chase, and stones that flow like liquid. Certainly no natural force we know of. (3) And as the text says she's his wife, wouldn't you be surprised to be magic-murdered by your husband? (4) It sure does. A circle in two halves, the sinuous line… it could almost be a yin-yang, except no mention of an eye or dot exchanged. Still, might be worth keeping this one in mind. (5) Always fun to try and interpret Very Important Capitalized Words in the context of a new world, isn't it? What could the Voice and the Singing be, that we're not used to? (6) Shai'tan, Satan, fairly straightforward. Also, get used to seeing taint because it comes up a LOT and we all like to giggle at it despite its horrifying nature. (7) Another two odd capitals in succession. (8) So, multiple powers are available. (9) Part of the setup, or perhaps conceit, of this world is that time is utterly cyclical. Exact events may not repeat, but the broad strokes will. We don't know how long the cycle is, but this guy seems convinced that it's been cycling a very, very long time. (10) A lot of information and word-dropping here. I think it's safe to say, the True Source is one of many names given to the magic in this world, along with others we'll see along the way. Traveling is fairly self-explanatory, going from one place to another with magic. Saidin is the name for the male half of the source, which was tainted when…

(11) OK, contextualizing what information is here: LTT led the Hundred Companions against the Lord of the Dark (whoever or whatever that is) trying to win the long and wretched war that lay behind them. Instead, they failed, and the DO tainted the male half of the power so that anyone who channels it will go mad, and do little things like kill their loved ones. This isn't your typical "mental illness" sort of mad, but a literal corruption of sanity and body by magical influence directly from the antithesis of literal God. (12) The chapter-namer, Dragonmount, the Dragon's mountain. Born of his shame. Surely not a symbol of anything, nor will it ever come up in conversation again. (13) Funny, we were just told by someone who knew the Dragon that he earned that name before all that happened, since that's what was just beginning in this little prologue. Isn't it interesting how history can lose details in the twisting of time? (14) Hey look, a saying about being born on a mountain, when a very convenient one was just boomed into existence. (15) The other excerpt seemed to indicate that the Dragon was a bringer of death and chaos, but this one, if it's referring to the same man (which seems likely as they're both attached to the same prologue chapter), seems to frame him as an object of hope and protection. Both are given equal weight here. Again I say, it's funny how history, translation, time, and interpretation can shift our understanding. So, is the Dragon a man of destruction and chaos, or of protection and salvation? We have 15 books ahead of us, do you think it will be as simple as one or the other? (16) Also interesting (I'm gonna overuse that word a lot) that both these books are said to be from the Fourth Age. You'll see why literally in the first paragraph of chapter 1 so I don't feel bad saying it here.

[bengiyo]

Never Let Me Go Ep 1 Stray Thoughts

I can't believe we have new shows from Jojo two days in a row. Who ever thought we'd be here?? (I did, in 2012) Very excited about this one, but desperately hoping that Pond comes through for us this time.

I do like a slow-moving shot to open a show. I am prepared to feel moody.

Don't know if Neung is queer yet, but if he already is then I will have thoughts about gay boys and their moms.

Glad the father isn't actually negligent. Neung wasn't giving off a long-suffering air. It's nice to know that he feels like a beloved son.

This feels like a lot of weight to put on a young person, but Neung is coming of age and so I respect the dad trying to prepare his son for coming duties.

This rainy alleyway scene is giving Batman.

As others have pointed out already, this pendant is so huge. We get the metaphor, but goddamn.

Phuwin gives a strong performance here. I'm glad the sound editors toned down the sonic presence of his scream, though. I felt it was too loud in the trailer.

Every time I see Perth I'm like, "Welcome back, baby boy."

I've been complaining about the use of Dutch angles in GAP, but I think they're appropriate here. Neung's world is tilted by the loss of his dad, who clearly loved him (he literally named his son "Only One").

Love the use of this red outfit to announce that Tanya will take over as CEO.

I'm so glad Nat is in this show and linked with Perth. They're going to be fun to watch.

Glad this show is using Phuwin's multilingual talent.

Pond looks good in this so far. The school uniforms did not serve his frame well.

I like how workmanlike Jojo can be about exposition. Sometimes it's more efficient to have a character detail their limitations and worldview quickly so the audience knows their starting line. We can figure out the reasons as we go along.

Love that conversation with the bodyguard/chamberlain outside school. The shifts in your relationships as you come of age is always hard.

We never had anyone this famously wealthy at any school I went to.

Chimon remains excellent at building onscreen chemistry with literally anyone so well.

I will be very disappointed when we learn that Chanon was somehow involved in Pipop's death. Both Neungdia and Tanya assert that they feel like he's family. For Chanon, though, it probably isn't his reality. This is going to get messy and I'm here for it.

Almost gagged when I saw Apo and Mile in a product ad at the start of part 2.

Not to be too distracted by the gun, but what is in this notebook that Neung keeps in the same drawer as the gun?

Also noticed the retro style speaker, and the painting of a piano full of butterflies.

At least Neung has some trigger safety.

I'm so proud of the hair and makeup team so far. They have not missed once. Phuwin looks amazing sitting in the pool.

Fantastic choice to show Palm's commute. After seeing the wealth of Neung's life, the signs of poverty and frustrated hit hard.

Ball is life (and apparently a gambling opportunity to cause problems later).

I will never, ever tire of boys pulling each other into hiding spaces and getting too close to each other's faces. Mutuals, feel free to do this to me.

Nat is so good. I am so invested in this beef between Tanya and Kit, and am so curious about the family history that led to the exclusion of Pipong's brother.

The Gifted has forever ruined the arm grab for me in these dramas. It only ever reads as hugely manipulative.

What does Neung know about these family troubles? He didn't seem surprised about the tension when he walked in, and looked to Tanya for guidance on whether to hug Kit back.

Is Palm choosing to not wear a tie, or does he not have one? I'm not surprised he wears the uniform loosely after working as a fisherman.

I don't blame Neung for bailing on a father's day event.

Chanon definitely assigned Palm as a bodyguard. I think Tanya is aware of it.

Who is this taxi driver and why is he willingly contributing to truancy?

So we finally know what building these windows have been in. I have seen them in The Gifted and War of Y.

Neung isn't dumb, and I'm glad he's aware of what's going on.

Every time they say they trust Chanon, he gets uncomfortable. Is that guilt?

Oh ho, we're going to start seeing more of Perth next week.

I had a great time with this first episode, and like that both of Jojo's shows feel so distinct from each other right now. I completely forgot that Phuwin is playing Ice in The Warp Effect. Hoping to see Pond blossom as this character comes out of his reserve.

[umbracirrus]

what made you settle on balgruuf of any character? just curious

OOOH

Okay okay okay, so like, bare with me on this because this is a very good question!!!! It is in part my own judgement of his character but alskfhsajdfhasdj I'm not normal about him

He is one of the first characters that become a 'constant' in the Dragonborn's main quest. You meet him early on, you go back to him time and time again, and he is always willing to listen to you even if what you are telling/asking him is downright madness (i.e. asking him to trap a dragon).

And that is even bearing in mind that you can downright tell him that you were being executed in Helgen, he sees the bigger picture than the fact that there is a soot-ridden possible criminal on his literal doorstep, because this one person has brought him news which set into action things which in the end likely saved the lives of many of his people in Whiterun hold.

He doesn't panic when the news of the dragons reaches him, he instead takes time to think and chooses to be practical by planning and preparing and remaining vigilant until the time comes that they can be pushed back and/or killed.

Whilst Proventus and Hrongar bicker about the importance of the Dragonborn and whether you are or not, he keeps a level head and advises you on what to do (go and see the greybeards because it was them who summoned you as that was what the thunderous noise when you reentered the city was) as opposed to showering you with admiration (or being highly suspicious of you)

The Dragonborn, as part of the main quest, becomes a Thane of Whiterun. That means that you have contributed significantly to the hold of Whiterun and that he trusts you.

And speaking of trust, he gives you his axe when you become thane and giving axes is a huge sign of trust in Skyrim (and I have written a mini essay on this before, so I won't go into that all again. that post is my pride and joy lol)

And speaking of Balgruuf trusting you, his voice if you join the Stormcloaks and says that he thought better of you breaks my heard ashjkasdablkjsdhjkh- (again, see linked post about axes above because you can only do battle for whiterun after you become thane of whiterun)

Even if you ask him the most nonsensical things, he thinks rationally about it. Yes, ending the dragon menace is a good thing even if the insane has to happen to do so (aka trapping Odahviing), but if the cost of stopping it is his hold and his people, it is out of the question. His priority is keeping his people and hold safe, and by the looks of things if things were to go to shit, when weighing up the options, it being the result of dragons is preferrable over it being a result of brother against brother, friend against friend. It is also likely preferrable because of my earlier point that he is trying to be practical about the dragons and come up with plans to handle them. He does not wish to partake in the war whilst he has the option to keep clear of it.

You don't often see him interact with them, but he has his family around him! His brother and children! And even though there is a lack of interaction, there are a few little ways in which he can be seen as looking out for them. For example, Frothar likes to go around saying 'Father says I'm too young to train with a sword' and that he wants to fight in the civil war. He's trying to keep his child as far away from the danger as he can.

Admittedly, Dagny is a bit of a selfish and spoiled child... and Balgruuf contributes to that. She argues with Frothar about how Balgruuf promised her a new dress and doesn't like it when her brother calls her out on the selfishness. It's almost like he can't say no to her when his little girl wants something (and adds an extra layer to his character that you don't really see otherwise in-game!)

And Nelkir, he does worry about the boy. He knows that he is typically a quiet child, but is incredibly worried about him once he starts falling under the influence of Mephala (though obviously doesn't know that), and is worried that he is the cause of him no longer talking to him and ending up all brooding, which unwittingly he kind of is, because of the secrets he holds... such as Nelkir having a different mother to his siblings (leading to a whole other thing about their identities because you have no idea who their mothers are, were they a string of tragic romances? a result of affairs and such? there are so many unexplored opportunities there, of which I quite like the concept of two consecutive tragedies explaining why he doesn't appear to have a significant other at the time of Skyrim because of what if it happened again, no, he needs to put what he has of a family and Whiterun first), that he doesn't want to be forced out of Whiterun, that he doesn't like the Thalmor, and...

He still worships Talos! In theory against rules, something which could potentially get him into trouble or killed, but he still does it, he still gets away with it, and may be a contributing factor to the fact that there is still numerous statues of Talos in his hold, including the city of Whiterun itself, and that Heimskr is still about preaching and not in jail.

Just quickly going back to Mephala, he knows (presumably first-hand if the book found during that quest is anything to go by) about the dangers of the Ebony Blade. He and Farengar did what they could to destroy it to protect everyone in the long run, but couldn't - so they did the next best thing and tried to lock it away in a hidden/difficult to get to room and limit access to it by being the only ones to have keys. I don't think he ever anticipated one of his own children finding said door though and getting the Dragonborn involved...

Going back to the worship of Talos, that is one of (but not the only) justifications for the civil war. In the end, he sides with the Imperials which is quite interesting, given that he seems to have a rapport with Ulfric Stormcloak. Though he does mention at times that he sees good reasons for both sides. His reasoning is not completely clear(from what I can recall without loading up the game) but based on the fact that he seems to look out for his people and hold over other things (and would have preferred to remain out of the war completely), he must have deemed that siding with the Empire was less bad of an option than siding with the Stormcloaks. Perhaps he felt that would lead to more stability in the long run.

Basically, he's a loyal man who looks out for those nearest and dearest to him (even if his way of doing so is unhealthy *cough* Dagny *cough*), holds his position with pride and does what he can for his people, and there are many little nuances of his character which I really just like and makes him much more of a multi-dimensional character than quite a few others in the game. Probably could've just said that from the start hehe.

As I have said though, this is my own interpretation of his character.

Sorry if this list is very ramble-y - I've been awake for like an hour or so at this point and still haven't sufficiently caffeinated myself lol...

[transskywardsword]

Oh hey!! I've finished sksw so I was really curious and wanted to hear your thoughts about Ghirahim and Demise :DD only if you wanna of course!! I had no idea that Ghirahim's and Link's last confrontation was gonna be THAT dramatic lmao. Though there is one thing I'm curious about!! I've seen a handful of Ghirahim enjoyers saying that Ghirahim resented Demise for throwing him aside? When if anything Ghirahim looked more than happy to serve Demise even if I meant being back into a sword?

Really I'd just love to hear your thoughts cause there's So Much going on there that I don't have the slightest idea where to start sjsjsjs

okay im an totally out of it rn (gotta love heat exhaustion, i work outside and it was 105 degrees today and i got very heat sick) but i could talk about ghirahim for hourssss so THANK YOU

so, i think people so often simplify ghira to just 'minion', but that does both him and demise a huge disservice. so we know ghira is a sword spirit like fi-- she is the master sword and he is demise's blade. so just as fi was 'programmed' (for lack of a better word) to serve link and then grew attached regardless, i see the exact same happening with ghira. pre imprisonment, he served demise out of expectation, but throughout the battles and demise's temporary defeat, that grew into actual emotional attachment. the sheer amount of emotional outbursts he has in skyward sword is proof enough to me of his connection w demise, but i think hyrule warriors REALLY shows how he has grown past simple duty into genuine dedication. ghirahim serves hw ganondorf bc ganon is tied to demise, but his fight dialogue shows a very fast, very intense devotion. ghira isn't the type to jump to serving someone so quickly; i think his connection with hw ganon is a sign of his dedication to demise, even after demise is sealed permanently. he is desperate for any connection to demise, and hw ganon is a means to an end to get that.

i don't see ghirahim as tossed aside by demise right before the last battle as much as i see him be a little frightened of loosing the agency he had developed. he'd been given rule of the surface, and obviously enjoyed that, and demise returning him to the sword rips that away from him, which i don't think he enjoyed very much lol. BUT i also think he got over that reaaaal quick, bc to him, he means nothing in comparison to demise. demise is his master, almost godlike in ghirahim's dedication to him. if demise asked him to walk of a cliff, ghira would skydive off it. demise placing him back into the sword was a little upsetting to ghira, but ultimately was minuscule emotionally in comparison to the pleasure of serving his master.

ultimately, while ghirahim is a sword spirit, i see him taking the spot of demise's champion/hero, just like the first hero did for hylia. he seems too valued (based on him being made ruler of the surface) to be 'just' some spirit, and demise obviously trusts him to resurrect him, which ghirahim ends up successfully doing! they are not equals in any means, but i do think ghirahim is seen more as a companion to demise than hylia saw fi. (i could take for hours abt hylia and fi but thats for another time) After all, if he was just some spirit, why would demise give him a personality, especially such a big one? demise made him like that instead of a calculating robot, and that makes me think he did so with the intention of ghirahim being in a role of power, fighting beside him, more than he intended ghira to be 'just' the sword, ya know?

and a note on ghirahim and fate: i think demise goes after the triforce not bc he's ~evil~ demon king, but bc he's been forced to take up the mantle of a god of darkness by the golden goddesses and fate. hylia is a goddess of light, of purity, and in loz it is made explicitly clear in multiple games that light needs a dark. i see din/nayru/farore as creating demise to be that dark. he is fated to be evil, and wouldn't that piss you off? wouldn't that make your furious? to be born just with the intent to be horrible? to be fated to be evil? so i think demise accepted fate and went 'fuck it ill be evil'. seeing his master do so really convinced ghirahim that fate is real, and that things happen for a reason, though he still very much feels he has control and free will.

anyways, this is mostly word voimit bc im sick and can't think straight but ahhhhh ghirahim is my fav villain in the whole franchise i love him so much!!! thank youuuuuu

[dwoality2123]

Flash frowns internally—or maybe he does it externally, too—as he stares down a guy who has obvious interest in his baby sister. The man in front of him—Graydon or something—returns his gaze with no sign of backing down. "May I ask...what's your relationship with Jesse?"

Flash raises a brow, "are you that curious?"

"I am, yes."

"Well, I've been curious myself. What do you think of Jessica?"

"....She's my friend."

"Is that it?"

"Are you looking for a different answer?" they challenge.

"Yes. A manlier one."

"A...manlier one?"

"Yeah, you know, direct to the point, leaving nothing for you to guess, that sorta answer."

They blink and lean back, having leaned forward during their daring conversation. "I..." they mull it over, looking for the proper words, "I want to be the one she loves."

Flash stays silent, searching their face for deceit. Slowly, he nods, and looks away, arms crossed as Jesse returns with their ordered beverages. She looks between the two of them, noting the tells of displeasure in her brother. She smiles and starts up a conversation with Graydon, not caring for her brother's lack of input for now.

She smiles as Graydon looks at his watch and excuses himself, having errands to run. She waves him goodbye and watches him drive away. Only then does she look at her brother who's already staring at her, knowing that she'll want to speak with him. "...You don't like him?"

He sighs and sips on his coffee, watered-down with melted ice, "not satisfied with him, no."

She purses her lips and nods, sullen at the admission. "What is it about him?"

He peers up at her, "just...suspicious of him. Plus, I didn't like his answer."

"Well, what do you want him to do..?" she inquires, hopeful but clearly upset.

Flash shrugs, "treat you well."

"He does, though."

"Then date him."

"But—" she exhales loudly.

He sighs after a beat of silence, "do you like him?"

"Yes," she says, resolutely.

"Then date him, even if it might hurt in the future."

She frowns deeper, "it's like you want me to be hurt."

"If I wanted you to be hurt, you wouldn't be asking what your boyfriend or whatever can do to make me like him. You wouldn't even ask me."

She exhales, her brother has a point.

"It's not that I want you to be hurt, I don't. I'm your older brother, I want to protect you from harm, it's basically my duty."

She glances at him.

"But, I can't protect you from every harm without doing the damage. It happens, we all get hurt, no matter how careful we are. If I try to protect you from every thing that might hurt you, you'd be hurt. If I didn't, you'd be hurt. Doesn't matter what you do, you can't live a painless life. What matters is how you overcome those painful times. That's what I'm here for, I'll always be here for you."

She smiles tearfully.

"Date him if you like him, maybe it'll be the greatest choice you make. Some things are worth the pain, in the end. And if he ends up being an ass, then I'll be here for you. Point is, you'll get hurt no matter what, maybe you two would argue, maybe he'd treat you badly. You'll make mistakes and you'll learn from them, you'll get hurt and you'll be stronger. As long as you get out of there when it's getting...toxic, then be with him. It's the happy memories that matters, in the end, right?"

She nods, "yeah."

"Promise me you'll leave if it gets toxic, though."

She holds out her pinkie, linking it with his, "promise. And I know that you'll be there to pull me out."

He smiles, "make good friends, yeah? Good ones, the ones that'll stick with you no matter what."

"I will, I do....Thanks, Flash."

He smiles, "anything for my sister."

[lanternmice]

you clearly love them a lot and i am So curious what ur thoughts on seven red suns as a character are. theyre.. kinda mean from what uve seen, but you probably have some great insights!! if this means gushing about your f/o instead of serious analysis i am also in 100% support of that gbjhf

WUAGHHHHH I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN I LIKE THEM SOOOO MUCH i really really want to talk about General interpretations but it's hard because of how obviously biased i am. but. Augh. this is so nothing but it got long and i'm embarrassed so woe read more be upon ye

i gotta start by mentioning that faelings original design & concept for suns (and spearmaster by extension) is sooo important to me and a lot of my personal interp comes from that, comics like this (link to the official discord btw) that they made for example! and though it has arguably less to do with suns, the 1.5 drought mod also has a special place in my heart but if i get too into that i'll start screaming and crying about it. just know that wanderer is so special to me and suns has two kitty cats that they love so much ok?🫶

anyways. i think because of the fact they aren't fleshed out much in canon aside from the spearmaster broadcasts there's a lot left up for the player to decide, which honestly is really fun to me and i genuinely love seeing other peoples interpretations!! but personally because you mentioned it and because i feel kinda strongly about this in particular, i wanna say that i don't think suns is mean, i think they definitely have the potential to be overprotective and intimidating, but it'd almost always be out of love. one thing the broadcasts ARE good at showing is just how much they care about basically everybody around them, even if they're a little.. dense about some things. they way they talk in the chat logs with nsh, about their guilt over pebbles' situation and trying to make up for it even though pebbles clearly doesn't want their help, about dooming not only pebbles but moon as well (who as far as canon text goes, they don't seem to have ever personally talked to moon at all imo). and when nsh stops messaging them, or becomes increasingly worried about moon, they get visibly concerned about his wellbeing as well and does their best to console him. my favourite broadcasts are the ones about their gradual realization that maaaaybe they care about spearmaster a little more than they originally intended to. they raised spearmaster, going as far as to teach it a personally modified sign language rather than a quick and easy one-way mark of communication like most iterators would do. the chat logs after spearmaster encounters pebbles and how worried suns was for it, about how they regret ever sending them to pebbles in the first place, and that they just wished it'd return home to them safely. there's also the fact that they kept an eye on spearmaster with their overseer basically 24/7, to the point that even pebbles knew that suns was watching. overseers can act on their own, we know that from what we see in canon, but pebbles knew that suns was actively watching when spearmaster entered his can. which. god this wasn't supposed to be about pebbles but pebbles not killing spearmaster is something that's so important to me because he so easily could have killed them and there was no reason for him not to. but despite how hurt he was and how wronged he felt, he knew that it would have ruined suns so he held himself back and it's so AAUUGHHHHHH!!!!!!! i love them all so much. this is barely even about suns anymore sorry i didn't mean to type so much about spearmaster i just love their campaign so much. don't even get me started on the thought of ascending as spearmaster that shit will make me start killing people i actually was going to talk about headcanon stuff too (mostly stuff from before the global ascension/after riv) but. i started thinking too hard about suns and pebbles and spearmaster and wanderer and and and. Well sorry but i fear that if i think about rain world any more today i may end up on national television. so maybe another day

[2manyfandoms2count]

Hi, can I ask you what the hypothesis you have about Adrien's connection to the rings is? I loved that take because I'm tired of all the Sentiadrien takes, so I'm curious what you have in mind. The Rings/ Family secret really has me stumped so far, especially because Adrien seems so far removed from all of it. Have a lovely night!

Hi Anon!

Yes of course! I didn't add this take in my Gabriel Agreste theory post because it was already pretty long and also it's a bit dark, so I'm not entirely sure how it could be pictured in a way that's not too explicit for a kids' show, but here goes:

Gabriel is an abusive father, whatever angle you look at it from - he's at least psychologically abusing Adrien by keeping him isolated, but there are also signs of physical abuse, too, the most obvious one being when Chat Noir was whacked upwards and then into the Eiffel Tower by his father in Chat Blanc. Chat almost Cataclysmed Hawkmoth in that episode, but he stopped, and there was a pause between him stopping and Hawkmoth hitting him, during which Hawkmoth got his cane back - so it wasn't self-defense for Hawkmoth (and anyway, the fact that Adrien is wearing a magical suit that protects him doesn't justify him getting hit with such force). He's also known for having violent reactions when angry, as shown in the Collector, where he destroyed his office in "a fit of anger" (which can't have been that ooc, otherwise Adrien might have known something was up).

So, how does that tie in with the ring(s)? Well, for one, in terms of body language, fidgeting with a ring can reflect many things, including someone wanting to keep their hands occupied if they feels like hitting something (or someone). Season 4 has shown that Gabriel does take out his frustration and anger by hitting things, notably in Sentibubbler, where he punches a wall as Shadowmoth (I seem to recall there was another instance in another episode, but I can't remember which one it was; there's another one coming if we trust the Gloob spoiler image of Gabriel's fist and the crack on Emilie's coffin we got recently, though). There's a big focus on him fidgeting his ring at the end of Megaleech, in a scene where he most definitely was frustrated with Adrien for not obediently complying and standing up to him, which could be an alternative to him contemplating whether he should take control of SentiAdrien.

Now, let's look at hitting someone directly - I took self-defense classes a while ago, but one of the things that really stuck with me was the instructor saying that wearing a ring is a plus when defending yourself against someone, for multiple reasons:

firstly, it might hurt more to slap/punch someone with a metal band than with your bare knuckles

secondly, it's more likely to leave a mark, which can come in useful when you want to report the attack.

That's the defense aspect - if you were on the attacker's side, you'd probably keep your ring on if it was supposed to be a one time thing for example, to cause maximum damage and prevent whatever triggered you hitting the victim from happening again; if it's something more regular, or something you wouldn't want to be seen, you'd take off your ring. In both cases, there's trauma associated with the ring on the victim's side, and toying with it could lead to them standing down and complying.

The time we saw Adrien do the latter, which really poured oil on the Sentimonster Adrien flame, was in Ephemeral; but the only time the ring and Adrien were hinted to have a link was in Megaleech, which isn't clear enough evidence that Adrien is a Sentimonster, especially since Gabriel Agreste didn't shine that much light on the situation in the end. We are however missing an episode between Megaleech and Ephemeral - Qilin. It's possible that Adrien stands up to Gabriel again then, and Gabriel slaps him, having just toyed with his ring before doing so, or having taken it off completely, making that body language a trigger for Adrien. Also, let's not forget that his dream, even if he doesn't remember it in this timeline, is to be what his parents wanted him to be... It's something that's anchored in his subconscious, and if he was indeed hit by his father at some point to get him to act more like Gabriel wants him to, then that would be reinforcement of "I need to act like my father wants me to".

TL;DR: Gabriel has been flirting with actual physical abuse since the beginning of the show, and he seems to hit/destroy things when he's angry. Rings are something that make a hit hurt more, and therefore seeing the abuser toying with it in a situation where they could be hit again is a gesture that could trigger the victim to stand down. It's an alternative to the SentiAdrien theory when explaining why Adrien complied in Ephemeral.

(Oops I knew this was going to be long, but I didn't think it would be this long... Thanks for asking Anon, I hope you have a lovely night/day/afternoon depending on where you are!)

[phobetonei]

Why do you think Aya is a timelocked teenager? Like I say this in the most neutral way possible, I'm genuinely just curious how you came to that conclusion.

to preface, i think any and all headcanons or thoughts about Aya's age is speculation (others, and my own included) we can draw from what info we have available to us.

so what do we have? that i can remember off the top of my head anyways

"After it was sealed, a young boy that resembled the original demon was left behind."

based on this, people are likely to draw the conclusion the demon was sealed away at a younger age. along with it apparently being sealed away as a prank for half of the reason, its strength as a demon is also subjective, which i personally think to be the signs of a younger demon.

as for how i think Aya never aged in the tome... it's just things i gather from other media that plays up the gimmick of characters that have been frozen, sealed, in stasis, etc... other examples i draw from being Aang from The Last Airbender, Link from Breath of the Wild, and even another Sega IP, being Shadow the Hedgehog from the Sonic series.

how the Tome affects its occupants has never been explicitly stated either, so people are free to draw their own conclusions.

considering the Tome ripped away Aya's soul and left it without available physical form to return to (the young boy that remained after sealing i assume to be Sig. how he exists as he does is also never discussed in detail, but i have other theories on that maybe) that needs to manifest again through possession, i come to an assumption currently that Aya has been unable to experience the effects of maturing properly in body and mind (that being a brain to store additional memory proper and mature from experience with) and is simply soul that occasionally is seen out of the Tome.

of course, does not explain how Aya can still act limited outside of the Tome at times (protecting Klug in PPT2) so i like to imagine it's some kind of dream-like semi-consciousness where Aya is still somewhat aware of its surroundings to an extent. but due to circumstances cannot mature and develop as an individual while sealed. not to mention i can't imagine being stuck in a musty old book on a shelf with nothing else to do would do much for a person anyways lol

also, the way Aya talks strikes me a lot like a theater kid or a sheltered kid to only had books to go off of. which might be accurate considering Aya was, before being sealed, a book-loving demon living alone in its castle, and never bothered with humans, and assumedly anyone else for that matter. how it ended up at a castle, who knows. mysterious means? bequeathed? just found it while bumbling about? beats me. i kinda would like to see Aya's castle though

of course though!! i need to stress the conclusions i come to are again, merely speculation and headcanon i develop based on what information is available to me via translations and whatever all else we manage to uncover from those translations. so i do not take what i think to be canon, as much as anyone who also insists Aya is some old guy is also not canon and simply just another's own headcanon conclusions. which is fine. i just personally don't see it myself, and that is okay. i think different ideas of a character can co-exist as long as we are mindful of what we choose to do with our own developed contexts!

also i am sorry if you felt like you might've had this ask ignored because tumblr app has failed on many occasions, including this one, to ever notify me of any ask i get (and i haven't logged back in on desktop yet) so if this has been in my inbox for a while then uhhh. woops (as well any typos. i am a disaster on my phone sometimes)

[ultimate-cinephile]

Can I PLEASE request some Viktor Licht fluff!! I'm completely obsessed with this little weirdo and cannot get enough 💕 I loved your kissing headcanon's btw

You 100% can! I've been wanting someone to request for a month now. Tysm Nonnie!!

And I'm glad you enjoyed them! Also, I had no idea what to do for a plot, so I decided to do this again seeing as how I had a lot of fun with Joker's.

VIKTOR LICHT FLUFF ALPHABET

A- Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

He definitely admires that you don't judge him for anything. You completely understand that he's devoted to his mission (and you of course, but you didn't hear that from me) and you understand why he does what he does, and he absolutely adores it.

B- Baby (Do they want a family? Why or why not?)

In truth, I don't think he thinks about having a family much. He most definitely wouldn't mind having one in the long run (especially with you), but you'd have to be the one to bring it up.

C- Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

Viktor loves spooning. By the time he goes to bed, you're usually asleep, so he crashes into bed next to you and pulls your back to his chest and he just sort of curling you because he's that tall. It's quite comfortable for the both of you.

D- Dates (What are dates with them like?)

It takes Viktor awhile to get used to the idea of dates. His idea of a date was just two people spending time together. So for awhile, you two just sat in his office while he worked. Then he did some research (watched some romance movies with maki and iris; he r e a l l y liked The Proposal) and decided to take you out on a proper date.

This being said, dates with Viktor are usually a spur of the moment thing and happen when you both have time, but they almost always open you up to a new experience and they're always fun. Sometimes you do something crazy like going to a casino for no reason and sometimes you do something peaceful like just walking around the city and sight-seeing and window shopping and all that cool jazz.

E- Everything (You are my ___; e.g. my life, my world)

"You are my reason for everything. You remind me everyday why I do what I do. Thank you."

F- Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

It was just after Company 8 finished an Infernal. You had slipped away from the rest of the group and Viktor, being the curious boi he is, went after you. He found you comforting a crying child.

It turns out that the kid's parent had been the one to turn Infernal, and you refused to leave their side until they we laughing and smiling again.

Something about that made his heart melt.

He had no idea what was going on and later googled his symptoms (after consulting any sort of reliable medical book/website he could find) and nearly had a heart attack when he found out what it was.

G- Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how so?)

Viktor isn't really a rough man. It's just his nature (I want to make fun of him for being a pacifist, but I can't because I'm one D:<).

Anyways, he isn't overly gentle with you either. He knows that you're more than capable of handling certain things by yourself and he's happy to let you do those things, but if he sees you struggling, he won't hesitate to help you out.

H- Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

He's very fond of linking pinkies. He's not a fan of PDA, but that doesn't make him uncomfortable and he likes holding you in some way. Though if he gets jealous, he wraps an arm around your waist (more on that later though).

I- Impression (What was their first impression?)

Well, since you are a part of the Fire Force (sorry to just assign you a role like this) he naturally thought you were a bit reckless, running into fires like that, but he can't really judge since he kinda did the same thing.

J- Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Oh, he does. He's much better at hiding it than Joker. Licht is very rarely intimidating, and the man cannot glare to save his life. A telltale sign that he's jealous is that he gets more affectionate in front of others. He'll wrap his arm around your waist and pull your back into his chest while resting his chin on the top of your head.

K- Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

Even though they're an expression of friendship, he adores eskimo kisses (when he can bend down to your height) or he likes gently kissing the top of your forehead.

Even though kisses with Licht are usually short-lived, they always communicate how much you mean to him and the words that he so often can't find to say himself.

You 100% had to initiate the first kiss. He was staying up late to work on something and you had to go to sleep or else you'd pass out on the floor so in your tired stupor you gave him a quick good-night peck to the lips.

He did not get any work done the rest of the night.

L- Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

Surprisingly??? Viktor.

Just before he goes to the Haijima lab with Shinra (i'm waiting on the dub, but i sWEAR IF THEY KILL HIM-), you run up to him and kiss him.

"I swear to Sol, Licht, if you die there, I'm gonna kill you. I love you too much to loose you."

Shinra probably had to slap him cause Viktor.exe had crashed.

M- Memory (What’s their favorite memory together?)

You and him were watching the Sound of Music, and you, being a dork, pulled him to his feet and started dancing around the room with him. Both of you fell back on your bed, laughing like a couple of idiots.

N- Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

Sometimes. He buys you stuff a lot, and sometimes if he's out in town and he sees something he knows that you'd like, he'll 100% get it for you. He loves seeing you happy and he's more than willing to spare a dollar or two to see you smile.

O- Orange (What color reminds them of their other half?)

Red. The first time you two had a proper conversation, you had accidentally cut your finger while cutting up something for dinner. He offered to help you after he saw you cursing yourself and wrapping your injured finger in a bandage.

P- Pet Names (What pet names do they use?)

I feel like Viktor isn't big on pet names but he sometimes calls you 'love'.

Q- Quaint (What is their favorite non-modern thing?)

Okay so, this is gonna sound weird, but he has a genuine fountain pen that belonged to some famous writer. He's quite proud of it.

R- Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

He loves to work on rainy days. He loves it if you sit there and watch him or if you sit in his lap. If you manage to drag him away, he'll do anything with you. Sometimes, just for the heck of it, he takes you outside and you two just walk around with an umbrella shielding you from becoming drenched.

S- Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Viktor just stirs his problems into coffee. He has no idea how to solve his own problems, so he has no idea what he's doing if he comforts you. He usually just lets you cry and rant and scream until you feel better. He'll hold you in his lap if you want. He has no idea what to do, please help him.

T- Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

Viktor will gladly talk about his research or if you manage to get him to watch something with you, he'll geek out about that with you. It's so cute watching him freak out about the ending to Rogue One, it isn't even funny.

U- Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

A nice, hot cup of coffee or tea and you

V- Vaunt (What do they like to show off?)

His fountain pen, you, sometimes his research

W- Wedding (Where, when, and how do they propose?)

It takes him awhile to even consider marriage. Honestly? It takes him long enough that you propose!

It was on a leap day, since that's traditionally the day a woman can propose, you had a nice ring in your back pocket. You tried seven times in one day to propose, but every time you got ready to pop the question, something would come along and you had to wait a minute.

Eventually you just got fed up with going through reports so you asked Licht then. He thought you were kidding when he said yes, but then you chucked a box and his head and he'd never been more happy for a mix-up in his life.

X- Xylophone (What’s their song?)

I know it doesn't ask for a relationship song, but the only song coming to mind right now is The Reason by Hoobastank.

Y- Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

As I said before, he doesn't really think about it until after you get engaged. After that though, he admires the ring with a smile as he counts down the days until you're married.

Z- Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

Well, animals are uncommon, but once Vulcan showed him a picture of a gerbil. He has no idea what it is, but he wants one.

okay! that's it! i hope you enjoy it Nonnie!

[iviarellereads]

System Collapse, Chapter 5

(Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For the link index and a primer on The Murderbot Diaries, read this one! Like what you see? Send me a Ko-Fi.)

In which Murderbot does the most relatable thing of all: stalls for time when it doesn't want to do something.

They finally make it down to the hangar, so Murderbot lets the drones scout a little further out. There's a piece cut out of the hatch in the ceiling, and Drone1 finds the exit to the pre-CR installation. There's no sign of recent traffic anywhere, just heavy dust that would obscure any tracks fairly quickly.

MB suggests that Iris and Tarik go up through the broken hatch, with Art-drone's help, and guide Ratthi in for a landing. Iris asks if MB will be alright, and reminds it that pulling out to regroup and strategize is always an option. MB says it's fine, and it will notify them if it finds "any not-dead humans." Ratthi tries too hard to make the joke land, and Tarik almost claps MB on the shoulder, but settles for a shrug instead. Art-drone is just happy to have its humans safer again.

MB thinks about why humans might have taken shelter here. It considers its theory about advance warning of the hostile takeover. It wonders how much they might have found here, and how much more they could have built in, especially tapping into whatever was still powering it all.

It thinks about this as it stalls for time because it doesn't want to do the next bit. Especially not without armour. After the redacted incident, Three offered MB the use of its armour, but Three still doesn't quite have the whole "personal possessions" thing down, and MB didn't really want to use it.(1) Three offered it some drones, as well, but it turned those down too. It wonders why it's like this.

Ratthi, watching MB's camera feed, asks why round hatches are scarier than square ones. Tarik is very confused at this, but Ratthi says it's a fact. Tarik asks why any hatches are scary. MB, trying to make the job work with too few drones, runs a quick query on its media database for hatch shapes associated with various monsters, sending the results to the others. Art-drone is snide about wasting processor cycles on it, but Ratthi is surprised at the numbers: 80% of scary hatches are round. He really thought he was just making a joke. Iris says it's not the hatch shape, it's the columns to each side of the hatches. MB stands its ground and says it's not running the query again, even though Art-drone agrees with Iris.(2)

Iris and Tarik are back on the shuttle now, and Art-drone returns to MB. Just as Iris is asking if MB has a plan for next steps, Drone1 finds lighting in a corridor. MB flubs informing the team, and is embarrassed when Ratthi nudges it to share the details, but does so. To cover, Ratthi tells the others to always assume MB has to focus on a drone doing something. Art-drone helps with this cover.

Drone1 keeps exploring, and MB keeps feeling like a failure. Still, it goes in, alone, leaving Art-drone at the entrance to, as MB puts it, slow down anything that chases it outward, so the shuttle has time to launch.

As it goes through the corridors, it has a very rough map from the drones' sensor data, enough to not run into the walls. There are signs that Adamantine, or the splinter colonists. explored here as well. Well, Ratthi notices, and MB kicks itself again for not noticing. At the end of what seems to be a foyer, there's a ramp that stretches down three storeys, cutting back and forth on the wall.

MB lets Drone2 go ahead and bump into the edges to map out a route, and follows. At the bottom, things feel less creepy.(3) Art-drone picks up a transmission, and MB freezes, and tells us the redacted bit of the story.(4)

About twelve hours after the new B-E ship arrived, as the humans were strategizing, MB blacked out for no reason it can recall, and woke up in Art's medbay. Art poked into MB's archive and found that it had a memory flashback of the events near the end of Network Effect, but with anomalies, like the corpse catching and gnawing on MB, even though it still has the original memory intact for comparison. There's no indication of a hack in MB, Art, Preservation's Responder, or the feeds, and none of MB's other memories or media storage are corrupt.

MB had a trauma response and shut down, literally. It and Mensah both lied to Amena and said it was issues related to the alien contamination, and they agree they did a crap job of selling the lie. But it happened in front of enough humans (and Art, and Three) that they couldn't hide entirely the fact that MB broke itself with a memory it apparently made up.

(They were all so nice about it. The whole thing made me understand the human expression “it made me want to vomit.” Why would you ever want to do something that was so objectively disgusting and looked so painful. Oh, this was why, I get it now.)(5)

MB unfreezes to one of its favourite episodes of Sanctuary Moon, obviously started by Art in their media feed. It was only offline for 0.06 seconds, enough that hostiles would have overtaken it but thankfully there were none present.

In the comms, Art-drone and Iris are arguing over contamination hazards, and nobody seems to have noticed that MB lapsed at all except Art.(6) Privately, Art-drone asks if MB is back, and when that's confirmed, says the same performance drop and error codes occurred, but the duration was shorter, so it's at least a related issue.

The transmission, it turns out, is a greeting. Iris believes it's an active, thinking system trying to initiate with Art or MB. Tarik asks if they think it's like the other pre-CR central system, and MB finds its voice function and says yes. The transmission tries more protocols, and Art-drone says it's looking for one they'll accept. MB recalls how the other pre-CR system wasn't what infected it, it's what saved MB's ass. It doesn't want to answer this one, out of fear, but it also doesn't want its stupid organic neural tissue to win.

MB asks Iris if it has go to respond. The humans all look nervous, but Iris gives permission. Art cuts the comms coming from the ship as a precaution, but stays connected to MB with a firewall between them as it acknowledges the system.

There was no pause, like it had no concerns about contact with foreign systems. It sent, Connection: ID: AdaCol2. Query: ID? Okay, this is going to be tricky. ID: SecUnit. Function: query? Registration/organization: query?

So, this system has been slightly altered to work with the Adamantine colonists (AdaCol), but this one hasn't been updated to know things like what a SecUnit is, where the other one had some idea. MB offers that its function is survey, and its organization is PSUMNT.(7)

MB asks AdaCol2 to contact AdaCol1. there's a brief delay before it sends that AdaCol1 isn't responding. MB asks for AdaCol1's location, and AC2 provides a string of numbers MB eventually decodes and compares to the Adamantine map data. It reports to AC2 that AC1 is offline to contamination incident, since MB isn't sure how to convey its gratitude in this machine's language.

Knowing it should be asking if AC2 is here alone, MB thinks how it's sure it isn't. AC1 felt alone, but AC2 is active, not cut off. MB also knows that AC2 is probably smarter than it sounds. It assembles a report as it might for a SecSystem, and then hesitates. AC2 might try to kill it, or might be stalling while the humans drag out their SecUnit killing weapons. But, it asks if AC2 will accept a data file. AC2 sends a hard address, probably an isolated box like what Art used to decontaminate MB. MB thinks how 2.0 could have gotten out of such a box, and sends the file, and waits.

Not wanting to watch media and potentially be distracted at a critical moment, MB sends the whole conversation to Art-drone. It drops the firewall, just as AC2 asks why they're here, and observes that AC2 is behaving like it has something to protect.

ART in any format is absolute shit at talking to other bots, but in this case I knew it was right. I needed to reply in a way that would make sense to a Pre-CR central system jury-rigged to network with Corporate-era tech. The Targets, ART’s crew being captured, Barish-Estranza, the hopefully dormant alien contamination site now lurking under the collapsed ruin of the Pre-CR colony site. But I kept seeing the memory of that last moment before AdaCol1 shut down.

MB sends a sequence of tags that essentially means, Barish-Estranza is dangerous, and can your and my humans talk? AC2 accepts immediately, after clarifying what "client" means to them, and sends an immediate access to a camera feed. Art cusses. MB takes in and describes a room with at least 22 humans in old, patched up Adamantine environmental suits… and the source of the cuss: 5 B-E humans and a SecUnit.(8)

Yeah, we were too late. ART-drone had already ended our containment protocol and opened comm and feed to the shuttle. It said, Iris, we have a problem.

=====

(1) My assumption/projection/thought about this is multipart. Murderbot doesn't want to take advantage of what it sees as Three's naivete while it doesn't understand personal possessions. I don't actually think Three is misunderstanding personal possessions, it just sees the armour as gear and wants to share to keep [the only other person who can properly use it, and who needs it more right now] alive. (Recall, Murderbot has a habit of just staring at humans making poor decisions when they refuse to do the smart thing. This is exactly what Three is described doing.) This post is a great supplement to my feelings about that. But also, MB also doesn't want to accept kindness unless it has no other choice, because transactions still make it more comfortable and kindness freely given is still unfamiliar. And, a part of me thinks that maybe MB doesn't really want the armour, because that would make it more SecUnit-like again, and it's just getting used to not being a SecUnit. Rather, I think it just whines about the armour because it makes a convenient sticking point, and it does long for the comfort of anonymity and lowered human expectations that the armour represents, even though those come at too high a tradeoff of individuality and free choice for it to actually accept. It's just good at finding convenient excuses for all this like "oh no I can't possibly trust the OTHER MURDERBOT to know itself like I do".

(2) I adore everything about this scene? Like, first MB is actually engaging with the humans, right. But also, it's supporting its buddy, and it's contributing relevant information thanks to the skills only it really has here. And, Ratthi's like, oh shit, it was just vibes but the vibes was REAL?! And Iris continuing the banter. Just, love love love. Chef's kiss, no notes. (3) Pre-CR digs and architecture are truly alien enough to inspire unsettlement even in SecUnits. A nice bit of lorebuilding. (4) Fucking FINALLY. (5) So, I was wrong about my guess, but very close. I feel okay about that. And, it breaks my heart that MB is so resistant to treating itself with the kindness the humans offer. Like, it's very realistic, don't get me wrong. But, sweetie, they're right. You've been through so much and you've never really given yourself the time to sit down and work through it. Of course you're going to have the SecUnit equivalent of PTSD from your entire life. And, the humans don't expect you to be anything more than you are or can be right now. That's why they keep pretending with you, and helping you quietly when you're distracted. Honey, they love you, and want the best for you. (6) Of course not, you sweet dumb robot, human reaction time is a quarter second, you were out for a quarter of that. The only one fast enough to notice anything was Art, who had time to pick and start playing your favourite scene so you'd awaken to comfort, not fear. (7) I find it interesting that MB aligns itself with Art's University, not Preservation. It's on Art's mission, so it IS aligned with the University for the purposes of this trip, but… interesting. (8) Ruh roh.

[ren-c-leyn]

After yesterday I'm super curious My Enemy, My Ancestor. Can you tell me more about this wip? How did it came to be? What are the main themes and characters? @writingonesdreams

Hey, thanks for stopping in ^^ This is going to be a bit of a ramble, so I hope your seat is comfy.

My Ancestor, My Enemy was a nano project. I didn't reach my word count with it, life got in the way that year, but the story was so interesting that I decided to keep it, much like The Firewalker and now Orion's Oblivion.

I don't entirely remember where my inspiration for the project came from, I know some of it was dungeon crawler rpgs, but that came later after I had settled on the concept itself. I do remember why I settled on writing it the way I did, though. Every nano I try something different with my writing. Sometimes it's a technique, like The Firewalker and My Ancestor, My Enemy, and sometimes it's an entire genre, like Orion's Oblivion. My Ancestor, My Enemy was me playing with a format I had recently learned about where a story is told from the point of view of like letters or journal entries. It sounded like fun, and then I decided to up the challenge by making it a primarily one woman cast instead of the giant casts of colorful characters I normally work with.

I'm going to preface the explanation of the story itself with: this is 100% a dark fantasy, borderline horror story, and some of what follows in this explanation is going to be a little gory. I was allowed to open my mental drawer of literal and metaphorical monsters and it got a little out of hand, but dear goodness was the result a striking tale.

My Ancestor, My Enemy is told from the mandatory field journal* of Lierin, a high ranking elven hunter, as she's sent on a mission to a human village that's under siege by her ancestors' monsters to find out the fate of one of her colleagues and, if she can, finish the mission he did not complete, which would be exterminating all of the monsters.

She finds out that it is sooo much worse than anyone had even dared to fear. It's not just a pack of monsters, it's an entire ecosystem of them living in the nearby caverns, the cavern systems her colleague disappeared in, according to the locals.

So, she goes into the darkness alone. A several month ride away from backup, she doesn't have a choice. The people are dying, being murdered in the night by these things, and she needs to either retrieve her ally, proof of his death, or proof of his abandonment of his duties. However, I'd be lying if I said that was her main interest when she first dove in. No, her main interest was butchering as many of the monsters as she can, and every time she succeeds, she dissects them, looking at what their organs are, where potential weak points she didn't find could be, and then writes about their anatomies, behaviors, environments, and how they fought in her journal.

But her missing colleague's mystery quickly starts filling her mind as she tracks him between hunts. The signs are... strange, and she can't make heads or tails of it. The deeper into the caverns she gets, the more confusing the clues he left behind get as well. It haunts her as much as the monsters themselves do, and she spends many dark nights in the caverns pondering the mystery of this place, while it ponders how to kill her.

* So, the mandatory journals link back to what I was talking about last night with the elves evolving entirely to fight their ancestors' creations. Every hunter has to carry a journal with them while on a mission, and has to record every day of that mission down in said journal. They are also expected to do what Lierin does and dissect the monsters and record every detail about them in that journal. Some of them even go so far as to draw anatomical drawings of the monster.

These journals are read through by the higher ups after the mission's completion and then stored in a giant library of these things. Young elves who are going to be trained to hunt are forced to obsessively read them for the first several years of their training to stuff their brains with the knowledge of the kinds of 'abominations' they may find themselves hunting. More experienced hunters also obsessively read these things, willingly and without a master hunter standing over their shoulders, as 1, they are pretty much the only books allowed and 2, there's a lot of different monsters and hunting techniques that could be helpful.

~

While I absolutely adore this project, as dark and intense as it is, I, unfortunately, ran into a bit of a problem half way into the first draft. I couldn't pick an ending for this story. It's not that I didn't have an interesting ending in mind. No, I had far too many and they all fit and they were all amazing, and my brain just kind of melted when I tried to decide. XD I put it off as long as I could, hoping something would come up that would help me decide, but I finally reached the point where I absolutely have to pick an ending and drive the narrative towards it. If I wait any longer I won't be able to properly foreshadow and lay down the ground work for it all to make sense. It's been sitting for awhile, so I was thinking of going back to it after I finish the first draft of Forgotten Gods, rereading it, and seeing if time and a fresh perspective might help me work out where this tale ends.

So, yeah, that's My Ancestor, My Enemy. It is definitely one of my darker projects.

I hope you have a lovely day/evening.