#i'll be travelling back to my city. grabbing my passport. then going the long way to the airport.

[octarineblues]

.

[asunsetgrace16]

⌜ ｉｎｓｔａｇｒａｍ ｅｄｉｔｓ ｐｒｏｍｐｔｓ ⌝

⌜ ｐｏｓｔ ｐｒｏｍｐｔｓ ⌝

Birthday

Soft Launch

Hard Launch

Valentines Day

Engagement Announcement

Pregnancy Announcement

Wedding Post

Vacation

Life Lately

Friends Appreciation

Night Out

New Years Eve

Christmas

Outed by the Media

⌜ ｃａｐｔｉｏｎｓ ⌝

Soft Launch

oh, i'm falling in love again

so i guess all the rumors are true 🥂❤️

call it what you want to 💌

all i know is that we said hello 💕🎀

at every table, i'll save you a seat 🍷🌹

we found wonderland 🤍

deep blue but you painted me golden 💛💫

is it chill that you're in my head 🌷💞

i met a boy, cute as can be

Valentines Day

you are the best thing that's ever been mine

your eyes look like coming home 💕☁️

this love is ours 💞🎀💌

swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover ❤️

love's a game, wanna play? 🌹💋

have i known you for 20 seconds, or 20 years? 💌 🌹

shining just for you ✨💕🪩

but it's golden ✨ 🤍

i've loved you three summers now, honey, but i want them all 💌❤️

one single thread of gold tied me to you 💫 🤍

i don't know how it gets better than this ❤️ 💫

at every table, i'll save you a seat 💕🥂

i'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home 🤍💕

can i go where you go? ❤️💌

can we always be this close? 🌹💋

all's well that ends well to end up with you r🩷🎀

king of my heart 🤍✨🏹

we never go out of style 💋☁️

'cuz i like you 💕🎀💌

you are the one i have been waiting for ✨💕

my one and only, my lifeline 🤍💫

uh, oh, i'm falling in love 💘 🌷

oh, i'm falling in love again ❤️ 💋

i'd like to hang out with you for my whole life ☁️💕

you beling with me

here's to my baby

i love you more

i wanna be your endgame

you are the one i've been waiting for

Travel

we found wonderland ✨🪽

grab your passport and my hand 🎫 💕

slowly lurching towards your favourite city 🌃

i know place we won't be found 🫧

lost in the memories 📸☁️

voted most likely to run away with you 🎫 🌃

capture it, remember it 🎞️🌇

worlds away

let's run away now

back beneath the sun

i don't know how it gets better than this

the right place at the right time

i remember how we felt sitting by the water

this big, wide city all to ourselves

all the beautiful times

drinking on a beach

welcome to new york

General

confetti falls to the ground

life in pictures

remember this moment

when it was hot & it was summer

I had the time of my life with you

so magnetic is was almost obnoxious

we never go out of style

shared dinners, long weekends

mismatched star signs

blue dress on a boat

taking your time in the tangerine neon light

midnights like this

my aura's moonstone

make the friendship barcelets

it's me, hi

meet me at midnight

how evergreen our group of friends

the best people in life are free

remember this moment

we're young and we're reckless

their parties were taseful, if a little loud

born to be national treasures

waves crash on the shore

red lip classic

standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset

Summer/Spring

summer lovin', had me a blast

summer lovin', happened so fast

Night Out/Birthday

confetti falls to the ground 💫 🪩

this night is sparkling ✨🪩

3am edition 🖤🌙

and btw, i'm going out tonight 🥂

we were too busy dancing to get knocked off our feet 💌🍷

meet me at midnight 🌃🌙

dancing with our hands tied

sequin smile, black lipstick 💄🖤

midnights become my afternoons 🌙

how'd we end up on the floor anyway? 🥂

late in the night, the city's asleep ✨🪩

i'm not even sorry, the nights are so starry ✨

dancin' in your levi's, drunk under a streetlight 🍷

glitter on the floor after the party

champange problems 🥂

i want your midnights

the one we danced to all night long

i have this thing where i get older ✨🕯️

it was the end of a decade, but the start of an age 💫🤍

with a big cake, happy birthday 🎂

older but just never wiser 🕯️🎀

take the moment and taste it 🍰💌

Winter/Christmas/Holiday

winter nights

back to december

it gets colder and colder when the sun goes down

under the mistletoe 🎄

'tis the damn season

in from the snow

Wedding/Engagement

voted most likely to run away with you 💍

i don't know how it gets better than this

let's run away now

would you run away with me?

all the beautiful times

remember this moment

[wastelandcth]

ghost of you - cth

summary: dovey’s been dancing around with the memories of calum and what their relationship used to be. 

author’s notes: here’s the part two of best years! inspired by this tik tok. 

warnings: angst, more sad feelings. 

masterlist || request || more doves

Here I am waking up, dreamt you were by my side.

The weeks seemed to blend together. Days passed much like the seasons and Dovey found herself back in LA with the small dog sleeping in the backseat of her car as she drove through the crowded streets she'd become so used to. It was dark by the time the city lights had come into view, but that never stopped people from being out and celebrating life. Dovey's first few days back in the city were spent in a haze, trying to distract herself from the fact that she'd be seeing Calum again in a matter of days. The first morning back in LA, Dovey woke up to the sunshine on her face, her brain still trying to process the dream that had played through her mind while she slept. 

"Do you think we'll always be like this?" Calum had whispered, his hair a mess from Dovey's fingers that had been tugging and running through it just minutes before. "Do you think it will always feel like we're on our honeymoon?"

He looked ethereal, the way the sunlight hit his skin and made him glow in that hotel room. Dovey could feel his touch on her skin, could feel the way his fingertips traced shapes onto her shoulder, and Dovey could most definitely feel the kisses her pressed onto her skin. 

"I hope so." she whispered back, looking up into the brown eyes she'd fallen in love with all those years ago, "Don't know what I would do if we lost this." 

Left my coffee cup at your place, almost cried. 

Dropping Duke off had seemed like a good idea when she had texted Calum and told him she needed to run some errands before their big meeting. She was almost positive that the old dog missed his house and the dog bed Dovey had forgotten to take with her months ago. The drive, one she had done a thousand times before, felt strange. The streets all looked the same and the neighborhood had changed since the last time she had been there. The lawns were littered with leaves that had fallen and the usual holiday decorations were gone. 

Calum had promised that he'd be out in the studio during the day, that he wasn't going to show up at home while Dovey dropped Duke off. If there was one thing she still believed about Calum, it was his ability to keep a promise, and so she found herself grabbing the hidden key near the front door and walking into the house she'd once called home. 

It was strange, being in the one place she had felt safe and comfortable in and now feeling empty. The AC was on and the windows were shut, making the once lively house silent and cold. Duke would have cared less about the way Dovey's hand shook as she looked around the kitchen and living room, he was on a mission to find the most comfortable spot in the house again. Once she knew that the dog would be comfortable on his own, until Calum came back and he was finally reunited with his owner after months apart, she made her way back to the entrance, her body tensing as she saw the mug on the counter. 

It had been a stupid idea. But Dovey had just been excited to spend some time outside of arenas and radio stations to explore whatever city the tour had brought them to. It had been their first tour together, Calum had practically begged Dovey to join him for at least a few weeks so that he could show her the world. They had snuck out early in the morning, hand in hand through the chilly weather in search of adventure. Calum had made a list of places he'd been wanting to check out and Dovey was not going to say no to spending all the time she could with Cal before they were shoved onto a cramped tour bus again. 

"Do you think they'll let me keep the mug? I'm pretty sure I could convince the waiter to let me take the mug." Calum had mumbled quietly as they sat in a cafe somewhere in the middle of the city, watching the crowds of people walk past them. "I'm pretty good at talking people into things."

"Oh yeah?" Dovey had asked with a chuckle, taking a sip of her own warm drink and examining the matching mug in her hands, "Think you could convince him to let us take both?" 

The mug, evidently, had made its way from a café in Europe all the way back to sunny California without a scratch and now it was staring Dovey in the face. The memories of the tour and just how happy she had been to see Calum in his element on stage and then taking city tours the next day brought a pang to her heart. But the mug had meant just as much to Calum as it did to her and she wasn't going to be the one to steal it from another shelf just for her to be sad again. 

'cause I dreamed long enough, without you I'll never be fine. I won't be just fine. 

Her dreams came in waves most nights. Some were like watching a montage of her life. Sometimes it would be memories of growing up and going to school and other times, it would be of Calum. If she was being honest, most nights ever since she'd gotten to LA, she'd dreamt of Calum. She'd dream of moments she had forgotten about, like their third date when she had made Calum laugh so hard that soda spilled out from his nose or when they pranked Luke while on tour by hiding his passport. 

Some nights, Dovey found herself tossing and turning as she tried to clear her mind of whatever dreams Calum had managed to infiltrate himself into. But the harder she tried the more he showed up and even after their talk, Dovey realized she couldn't ever get him out of her mind. 

I can't drown this out like I always do. 

She found herself walking out of the hotel room in the middle of the night, wrapped up in a hoodie and fuzzy socks. In her mind, the plan was to call him an idiot and tell him he was never allowed to stop talking to her again, which seemed fair considering he hadn't stopped talking the day before when they had been face to face for the first time in months. Then she was going to take the ring back, making sure he knew that if he ever fucked up like this again and she took it off, there was no way in hell she'd ever put it back on. The third step of her plan, the part she was blaming mostly on the dream she'd been having before she shuffled out of bed at two in the morning, was to grab his stupid face and kiss him. 

Dovey had ran over her brilliant plan a few times in her head as the elevator travelled down to the lobby, her mind racing as she began to doubt the genius of it all. Because what if Calum hadn't meant what he said the day before? What if he hadn't wanted to get back together and he was just asking for closure? Surely he would've made it clear, right? Was Dovey just going to drive to their- to his- house and make demands? She had surely lost her mind due to the lack of sleep and now she was going to embarrass her-

"Dovey?" Calum's voice brought her back to the elevator, whose doors were wide open and a very disheveled looking Calum stared back at her in confusion. 

"Calum."

When I close my eyes, I see the ghost of you.

The sun was coming up by the time Calum and Dovey found themselves tangled up in each other's arms, chest rising and falling in unison. The soft light of the sun was peeking in through the blinds of the hotel room and Dovey found herself looking up at the man who she had thought she'd lost. The man who she had given her best years to. But as he laid next to her, with flushed cheeks and curls stuck to his forehead, Dovey realized that he'd given his best years to her. From the ring he'd never taken off since the day she had slid it onto his finger to the way his body fit against hers so perfectly, Calum had been there for all of her best years and they were both going to be there for the rest of them too. 

They might've missed out on a few months, both of them too stubborn to be the first one to cave in and admit the truth, but as Dovey's dreams melded with her reality and Calum's fingertips found their way across her skin, there was no one else she would rather have next to her than Calum. The ghost of pain and loneliness had been next to her for too long and she wasn't going to let them stay any longer. Calum was real and he was holding her like no one else could. For the first time in what seemed like months, both of them found themselves drifting off to sleep with promises made of love and more of their best years to come. 

taglist:  @hoodhoran​ @finelliine​ @moonlightcriess​ @dinosaursandsocks @mxgyver​ @calpops​ @karajaynetoday​ @notlukehemmo​ @calumrose​ @devilatmydoor​ @lyss-xo​ @lowkeyflop​

[hugee0715]

"I'll look back on this and smile because it was life and I decided to live it."

I read that quote on the wall of a trampoline park while standing next to the restroom, totally covered in sweat. I was waiting for my girlfriend to finish after our 1 hour of jumping around ended.

I was standing there, waiting for her. My girlfriend. The girl I mentioned so many times. I was there with her. In Manila.

On the 10th of April I went to the airport for the first time in my life. I had a ticket and a passport in one hand, a suitcase handle in the other. My brother wasn't believing that I was doing this. The sister he used to have would never do this. For fucks sake, she wouldn't even travel 2 hours to spend a weekend at his place for years.

But now, I was going on a 22 hour trip. 12k kilometers, spending 3 weeks in a place I knew almost nothing about.

10 hours later I was in Beijing. I went through all the checkings and I still had about 7 hours of waiting for my next flight. So I went to an information desk to get access to the wifi. I got a code, I logged in, it was all going very smoothly up until I opened Messenger and nothing happened. I guess all my excitement made me forget that I will be in China for 7 hours, where all kinds of social media that I am using in my everyday life is blocked. So I wasn't prepared and I couldn't do anything. No Facebook, no Instagram, not even Chrome and of course the app store wasn't working either. I managed to send out a few quick emails saying that I am safe and sound, but after a few minutes my gmail wasn't working either. I found myself completely cut off.

I tried not to worry, hoping that everyone would just go with everything as planned even though they haven't really heard from me ever since I boarded in Hungary.

So at 8pm local time I got on my flight to Manila, starting to hear more and more people talk in tagalog around me.

1 am came around and we landed. Stepping out, I felt hot and humid air suddenly hitting me, which compared to the cold and dry air of the plane was a bit shocking, especially because I was still wearing two jumpers and jeans.

I walked down the long, carpeted isles, pulling my little carry on case after me, holding the immigration paper I got on the plane tightly. I already filled it out and soon I was standing in a line, waiting for my passport to be stamped. I was prepared to be asked the usual "What's the purpose of your trip?" question, but the guy really did not stop there. He had tons of follow up questions, about who am I visiting, why, where did I meet them, where am I staying, where I'll be going. But in the end, I got my first stamp in my passport and I was one baggage collecting away from leaving the airport.

I made my way out, with my love on the phone, trying to figure out where I needed to go. My heart was beating fast, I was sweaty, struggling with the two suitcases and the phone. She was full of nervs as well, I could hear it in her voice. It was her mum who I spotted first, she was frantically waving at me from the upper level. I stopped, I was scanning around trying to spot her, she was saying she can see me, but even though I was looking, I didn't really see anything around me. It was all just noise and movement, nothing recognizable. When she was only a few meters away, that's why I laid my eyes on her for the first time. Phone against her ear, a big smile. The black turtle neck I love with jeans. It felt so surreal, I didn't even have the opportunity to freak out. I ended the call and waited till she came closer, her mum arriving shortly as well. There wasn't any of the dramatic things you see on the internet. No running and collapsing in each other's arms. To be honest that seems too cliché. As much as I knew this person better than anyone else, it was still the first time we were physically in the same place.

We went to the car where I met the rest of the family, her dad, brother and sister. I was stunned, speechless at first. I saw them so many times, I heard so many stories and now it was reality.

I sat next to the window on the left side, she was in the middle. Our shoulders were touching. I intentionally moved even closer, I wanted to feel as much of her as possible. The warmth, her smell. Driving through dark streets I never thought I'd see. I looked down and her hand was extended, her palm facing up, waiting for mine to grab it. I took it and soon her fingers wrapped tightly around it. A scene at the airport with running and crying and screaming? No, thank you. This was the best welcome I could ever imagine. So much better than any of that could have been.

Days went by fast after that. Soon her graduation came, on the 16th of April. On the day that marked us being together for a year and a half. We went to the Philippine Arena, the biggest indoor one in the world apparently, but you need that when close to 3000 students are graduating. It was long so so long, but seeing her in her toga, with the make up I put on her earlier made me too proud to notice that I was tired untill it ended at around 11 at night. We stopped to eat at a Jollibee again and then I fell asleep on her shoulder on the way home.

Our days together were full of comfort. No feeling of anxiety, no feeling of having to be a certain way. It was natural, we clicked like nothing else. We had our unspoken roles, working together, managing daily tasks. We cooked, cleaned, did our grocery. We were responsible for ourselves. And we loved every second of it.

I also learned many new things about her. She's taller than she claims for example. And also a lot more thoughtful than she ever made herself seem. The little acts of giving me a glass of water whenever she drinks or leaving me mouthwash in the cup after she used it. Getting me just the right amount of food on my plate and always knowing what to get me at places so I would like them. Waiting for me to get ready and helping me choose clothes. Being concerned about me getting burnt. Maybe half of those things are involuntary, but I don't mind that. It might even make it a little better.

She's the reason I never got scared for a single moment while I was there, no matter what places we went to, how late or crowded it was. I got to experience life like a local, all the filipinos might have been looking at me and seeing a tourist, a foreigner, but I wasn't feeling like one. It was home and now I feel homesick for a city I spent 3 weeks in. Coming back to Budapest was devastating, I don't know if I'll ever feel the same way about it. I used to think it's the best city, my happy place and now? It feels foreign. Like it was never really my home.

On the day I left my brother said that he's going to get a completely different sister back after the trip. I shrugged him off, but he was right. There's nothing I feel the same way about. Especially Ileana, my love for her changed tremendously. I used to be in love with the idea of what we would be like. I remember that almost a year ago, on April 16, 2018, I made her a video as a gift for us being together for half a year. I remember talking about how lucky I am in it. Lucky, because I'll get to fall in love with her twice. And I was right, I did fall in love with her once again. The core parts of her were there, her voice, her mind, her ideas and the amazing conversations. But they all got upgraded. They all showed how there's so much more to her than what a video call can show. The angles I've never seen before, all the habits that she has. And it swept my feet right out of under me.

Malls, lemonade, Inasal, basketball, rice, nuggets, AC, sunburn, late night car rides, flamingos, donuts, happiness. Those words will forever be connected to our days in Tandang Sora. Or at least till we can be together again. Because our relationship is not about being on the phone anymore, that's not us. Us is when we are together. And we'll be together again soon, I promise.

"I'll look back on this and smile because it was life and I decided to live it."

That quote from that bathroom still crosses my head multiple times a day. I decided to live when I met Ileana. I decided to live when I realized that I'll have to do things in order to keep her. I decided to live when I left on this trip.

This is life. And I'll keep deciding to live it.