#i’m gonna write dad hoon first

[enha-stars]

dad heeseung i am going insane

anon you are so me bcuz same

[fallin-flcwer]

JIWON’S TRUTH BOOTH

GENERAL QUESTIONS

1. Please state your full name: “Moon Ji Won” 2. Does your name(s) have any kind of meaning? If so, what is it? “My name has numerous meanings. “Ji” can either mean ‘wise’ or ‘ambitious’ and “Won” can either mean ‘beautiful woman, as well as ‘first’. My parents never really decided what it meant, but I just take it as “ambitious and beautiful woman.””  3. Do you have any nicknames? “Nope” 4. Where were you born? And in which country? “Seoul, South Korea” 5. What is your date of birth? “I was born on June the 22nd, 1998″  6. Of course, the following question; what is your Zodiac sign? “My star sign is Cancer, I believe.” 7. Do you believe in Zodiac signs? “Not completely, but I still find them interesting to read about sometimes.” 8. Where do you live? “I’ve got a house Lilac Wells, I’m staying in while I’m here. I’ve also got a house in Seoul, as well as in Tokyo but I don’t visit that one often since I’m usually busy in the first two.” 9. What is your home situation like? (ex. do you live with your family? Your partner etc.?) “I live on my own.” 10. Do you have any siblings? “I’m an only child.” 11. Do you have any kind of allergies? “None that I know of” 12. Do you own any pets? If so, what kind of pets are they? “Yes! I’ve got a miniature poodle called Bambi and a bombay cat called Byeol” 13. Why did you apply to St Jude’s? “Honestly I just did it for fun. It wasn’t until I got accepted that I realised how big of an opportunity it was.” 14. Did you had to go through a lot audition rounds? “Not really. I had already debut by the time auditions came. Personally, I think I could’ve done a lot better for my debut, but it still got me by.” 15. What is the current course you’re following? If you can switch courses, which one would you switch to and why? “I am currently doing music and dance. I think acting and fashion would be fun” 17. What is your proudest project you’ve done? “Gotta Go! I think some people my argue that Snapping was the better comeback, but I still see it as a sequel to Gotta Go. It definitely the comeback that started steering my career to where it is now.” 18. What is the proudest project that someone’s else has done? “Singular Act I! I think, especially since Everleigh and I were both opening acts for Ruby, I’ve seen her grow so much as an artist.” 19. Do you like FanCons? “Yes!” 20. What do you like about FanCons? “I like being able to meet fans.” 21. What don’t you like about FanCons? “I don’t really have anything bad to say about them.” 22. A fan memory that always stuck with you? Can be positive or negative. "While I was doing a fansign one fan walked towards me, got on her knees and bowed down. It happened so quickly and caught me completely off guard.” 23. Your favorite event so far? “I love anything halloween, to be honest.” 24. What kind of event would you like to see in the future? “Something in Korea, maybe? We’ve got quite a few K-Pop artists here now so it’d be nice to do something there.” 25. Would you recommend St Jude’s to friends, family. etc? “Yes.”

PERSONALITY QUESTIONS

26. What are your positive traits? “I am very ambitious, approachable, and detail-oriented” 27. What are you negative traits? “Sometimes I don’t know when to rest and I kinda set myself into overdrive until I’m satisfied with everything” 28. What would other people describe you as? “Hard-working, always busy and resourceful” 29. What are your pet peeves? “Does constant, loud yawners count?” 30. What makes you happy? “Seeing a project I’ve been working hard on finished.” 31. What makes you upset? “Seeing people not take me seriously because I’m a woman. It doesn’t get to me as much as it used to, but it’s still gets disheartening from time to time.” 32. What is something you love? “My parents, Byeol and Bambi, and my work.” 33. What is something you dislike? “Having my idol and hotel life interfering with each other. I’ve done a pretty good job keeping them separate, but there have been times where they’ve coincided and it got too overbearing.” 34. What are you strengths? “Singing, Dancing, Working” 35. What are you weaknesses? “I can be overly critical of myself when things don’t go to plan.” 36. A misconception people often think of you? “That everything came easy for me. Yes, I’m privileged, but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t work. In fact, it really meant that people expected more from me. I graduated high school and got my degree early, but I worked myself to the bone making sure I was on top of everything. I chose to become an idol as well as working in the hotels, and people gave me hate for it. That’s died down a bit, but still... Both jobs consist of me having to satisfy people, so I have an ongoing cycle of writing reports, writing songs, recording, choreographing, performing, promoting, the list goes on forever and it’s rare that I ever catch time to set aside for myself.” 37. Do you have any fears? “Mice and rats. I’m fine with mice that are kept as pets and stuff, but if I ever found out that there’s a mouse or a rat living in my house. I just might move out.” 38. What scares you the most? “Not being able to live up to people’s expectations of me as the next CEO of the family business.” 39. What do you do to entertain yourself? “I don’t have time to entertain myself, unless choreographing counts, but it’s still work.” 40. What is your MBTI? “I believe I am ESFJ-A” 41. How do you deal with stress? “I think I handle stress relatively well. I kinda just work through it.” 42. Are you a determined person? Are you a stubborn person? “I’m definitely a determined person” 43. Do you consider yourself selfish? “I think sometimes I can be, but after a bit I scold myself for being selfish.”  44. Would you like to be different? “Nah” 45. Are you more introverted (focused on your inner world) or more extraverted (focused on other people and the outer world)? “I’m definitely more extroverted”

ROMANCE QUESTIONS

46. What is your sexual orientation? “I’m heterosexual”  47. Current relationship status? “Single” 48. When was your first kiss? “I think I was about 17″ 49. Do you remember your first date? If so, with who was it? What did you do? “My first date was set up by my parents. It was with a one of their acquaintance’s sons in Tokyo and he showed me around the city.” 50. Have you ever experienced heart-break? “Yes” 51. Have you ever been in love? (If yes, skip to question 53) “Yes” 53. How do you know when you’re in love? "I think it’s when I realise I want to spend time with them outside of work, and I catch myself trying to make time for them despite always being busy.” 54. What would be your ideal date? “A day out exploring. I’m more of a city person, so that’s my preference, but I’m open to anywhere” 55. What is your perspective on marriage? “I’d love to get married one day, but I don’t think I’ve ever have the time for it at this rate. Maybe if I ever quit becoming an idol I will.” 56. (only for non-virgins) Are you a sub, dom or switch? “Pass” 57. What do you think of relationships? “They’re best when both parties are putting equal amounts of effort into it.”  58. What do you think of one-night stands? “I don’t really have an opinion on them. I’m not gonna lie, I’ve experienced one or two before when I was younger, but it’s not something I plan on doing again.”  59. Are you still a virgin? “No”  60. Most attractive trait in a different person? “A nice personality” 61. What matters most to you when it comes to a relationship? “Honesty and loyalty. I’m also an incredibly busy person, so I hope that they can be a bit patient with me too.” 62. Are you comfortable with PDA? Or would you be comfortable with PDA? “I think so? I’m relatively private when it comes to relationships but I think once I have the confidence to go public I’d be fine with PDA.” 63. Are you more of a type to be asked out or the type to ask the other out? “I’d rather be asked out.” 64. How do you express love to the other? “I change my schedule up to make time for them.” 65. Who is your celebrity crush? “Sung Hoon”

GETTING DEEP QUESTIONS

66. Do you regret anything? “Yes” 67. Is there something you would like to re-do? So, start all over again? “Pass” 68. What is something you would never share with anyone?  “As rewarding as my life is, it can get draining.” 69. When was the last time you cried? Why did you cry? “I definitely had a mental breakdown sometime between after Boxing Day and New Years. I got into a little argument with one of my Dad’s competitors during an event in Seoul and I had a little breakdown when I got home.” 70. Most memorable event that happened in your time in St Judes? This could be anything: “Winning Female Artist of the Year at Spotlight. Since there were so many artists nominated that had a big impact on St. Judes I was 100% certain that I wasn’t going to get it.”  71. One thing you wish you could do all over? “High school. To be honest, I didn’t really make many friends growing up, since I was so determined to rush through my studies.” 72. Someone you miss? “My mother.” 73. Something you wish you could forget? “My past relationship”  74. Who has the biggest impact on you? “My parents” 75. What is your perspective on love? Is it beautiful? Does it scare you? “Love can be risky, but if you play your cards right it can be rewarding.” 76. What has hurt you in the past that you don’t want others to go through? “Pass” 77. What is something you have gained, something you have lost and something you let go of during the past year? “I think I’ve gained a lot of direction as to where I want to go as an Idol in the past year. I haven’t necessarily lost anything, but I’ve let go of a lot of the negativity people usually give me when it come to my role in the family business.” 78. Have you ever lost a friend? do you wish you would still be friends? “I’ve definitely neglected some friendships because of my workload. If I got the chance I’d love to reconnect with them.” 79. Do you have any triggers? What is the history behind these triggers and are they related to any disorders or mental illnesses? “Nope”  80. If you could meet your 16 year old self, what would tell them? “Keep pushing through the same way you do, but don’t be afraid to relax whenever you need to.”

RANDOM QUESTION ROUND

81. Summer or Winter? “Winter” 82. Cats or dogs? “Dogs” 83. Beach or mountains? “Mountains” 84. Phone calls or texting? “Phone calls" 85. Have you ever skipped class? “No”

[australian-desi]

Qurbaan Hua ~ Episode 5-9: Of IVF Being Horrible, Windchimes, Cunning Aunties and Disgusting Husbands

Gonna dive right in

Episode 5

Mans has gone from “me and Meera have been dating for 6 months” to screaming “I LOVE YOU MEERA” at the top of the mountain 

Time for another coincidance - it’s purnima so he’s going to go ask for a mannat and on this day different people from different faiths go to this certain place for their wishes and prayers - and we all know what that means

Also now that I’ve watched a few episodes, I have to say I really like the styling  for Chahat they’ve given her a mix of ethnic and western wear and the fancy clothes she wears are really pretty (so far) and I hope it stays this way

I am a complete slut for mannat scenes and this one was very pure

Why can’t these people say Saraswati, it isn’t that hard

Also it’s 2020, surely it’s time we understand just because a woman is pregnant doesn’t mean she’s disabled and needs to be carried everywhere

Also, Naveli (Anjali2.0 and Neil’s cousin) is superrr suss

SHE TAPED HIS FACE OMG IM MORE IMPRESSED BY HER BY EVERY MINUTE

And she’s given him meds to give to the people he interacts with coz he causes them headaches (and he’s held onto it the whole time coz Pehle Pyaar Ka Pehla Tohfa) 

Awww our OTP has ‘Bhags stamp of approval’ 

They’ve also touched her feet how cute

Episode 6

So Ghazala has ruined Chahat’s mum’s sharara and like this is what I mean they’ve written her horribly, like why would someone go out of their way to hurt a kid like that - her mother’s dead what more does she want

And daddy dearest has another pooja to attend so he’s said no to attending his daughter’s baby shower, something Neil is now salty about

For a doctor, Chahat’s dad is quite daft 

And for a pandit, Neil’s dad is quite mean

Nice touch by Ghazala by turning this whole thing on Chahat, and thankfully her dad believes her

Episode 7

So this Kamini wannabe of a mami has said that Saraswati’s baby is najayaz, and at this point I really have got to ask - how the fuck did she jump to that conclusion?????

Apparently coz she was barren for 8 years, so how can she be pregnant now, so something must be up 

The logic fails me here, IF SHE WAS BARREN/WAS UNABLE TO GET PREGNANT, HOW TF IS THE CHILD ILLEGITIMATE???

OMFLLLLLL SHE’S SAYING THAT COZ THE CHILD WAS CONCEIVED FROM IVF, THAT’S WHY IT’S ILLEGITIMATE 

I CANNOT

I’M SO CLOSE TO QUITTING 

DO THESE DUMBASS PEOPLE NOT REALISE THAT AN IVF BABY IS ALSO A BLESSING IN ITSELF, IT’S NOT 100% GUARANTEED TO GET YOU PREGNANT EITHER BUT IT HELPS 

By this logic they shouldn’t use annnnyyyy modern technology 

I understand Neil now, and why he’s so done with this bullshit

YAAASSS NEIL, GO FUCK THEM UP 

Look Chahat, I love you and all, but like listen to Neil when it comes to his crazy psychotic family

Also do not tell me like the Oberoi family, this whole family cannot have 1 smooth sailing function/party 

We love a sibling duo that had to raise each other because their parents were dead/useless 

I’m so fucking done, now not only does your doctor have to be of the same religion, he/she has to be from the same caste 

YEH DOCTOR DHOOND RAHE HAI KE RISHTA 

Neil’s trying to talk some sense to these people, but as usual, he gets shut down for talking sense 

OMG HE’S COME OUT WITH FACCSSSS AND HAS GIVEN HIS DAD AN ULTIMATUM - His daughter or his dharm 

Also by saying that if he’s so for modern technologies in other areas, why is he against iVF 

Omg daddy pandit finally got some sense - this was an exhausting feat

Poor tacky Kamini, unlike the og, this one’s plans always fall short 

Neil, take Saraswati and just get the fuck out of here, this dumbass mami has come with a plan and is not going to rest until one of these kids gets disowned 

Episode 8

So Vyasji in a twisted turn of events has accepted Neil’s gf, as long as their kundlis meet 

Let’s be real their stars ain’t aligning in this life 

Chahat is talking to her mother through this windchime she made with her mother’s jhumke (I guess its a coping mechanisms) about how she’s gotten a cake ordered and needs to pick it up

The windchime has told her that she needs to learn how to cook to get married 

Basically even if your Indian mother is dead, her ghost will still taunt you on your inability to get married even when you are a doctor 

She has decided she will marry a chef so that she doesnt need to learn how to cook 

The foreshadowing, the cluelessness

Omg Neil’s dad writes with ink and a peacock feather (why did I think this man would write with a pen like a normal person)

He’s literally whipped out a chart and started making Neil’s (ex)gf’s kundli RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS DAUGHTER’S BABY SHOWER BECAUSE #priorities 

Anjali2.0 is literally sitting there praying as if Vyasji is sitting there calculating her Year 12 results and not a kundli

And we’ve got an “asambhav”, but we all knew that - Neil’s literally smirking coz he knew no matter what, the stars won’t align 

Omlll he’s inherited the whole “I write my own destiny” from Arnav 

“Main uss ladko ko kabhi nahi apnaunga” “Toh kya faraq padta hai, main usse apna chuka hoon” Boisss I really like this dude 

I wish I had this confidence but alas, I do not

And Neil has decided to leave the chat, go to Delhi and get married there, while giving everyone a fuck you (except his sister ofcourse)

Little does he know he isn’t even gonna make it to the bloody bus stand before he ends back here 

Anjali2.0 is begging her dad to stop him, but he’s talking about the stars and shit 

And right on cue Chahat and Neil are walking on the same bridge, none of them paying attention, they crash and just like that, the cake has fallen into the deep sea, adding to the pollution 

OMGG THIS MAN TOLD HER HOW ALL DADS ARE USELESS AND SHE GOES “oh hello, tumhe bohot saare childhood issues hai, lekin mere baba aise nahi hai ... woh mere liye taare bhi tod sakte hai” 

THIS IS WHY WE NEEDED A FEMALE LEAD IN THE MEDICAL FIELD - SHE UNDERSTOOD WITHIN 2-3 MEETINGS HOW FUCKED UP OUR DUDE IS 

and now he’s sarcastically congratulating her on her father because “aur ek mere baba hai jo hamesha taaron mein uljhe rehte hai, aur vaise tumhe tumhaare taare todne waale baba, bohot, bohot, bohot hi ziada mubarak” 

LOLLL SHE’S PULLING AND DRAGGING HIM TO GET HER THE SAME CAKE AND HE TRIED TO GIVE HER MONEY TO BUY A NEW ONE, AND SHE’S LIKE NOPE, THE BAKERY I GET THIS FROM IS CLOSED AND SO YOU WILL PROVIDE ME WITH A NEW CAKE 

Lolll I never knew he will be stuck here because of a cake 

AND NOW SHE’S TAKEN HIS BAG AS HOSTAGE AND HE’S LITERALLY SCREAMING THAT SHE’S LOST THE PLOT 

But personally, I feel she gained it 

Turns out the shop that she got the cake from, is his friend’s shop, and now he’s baking the cake himself because my man is also a pastry chef 

And he’s friend has left the chat because he doesnt want to get beaten up 

So it’s time for the kitchen romance.tm

Omg he told her he’s a chef and she’s so turned on 

OMGGGGGGG IM DEDDD 

But should’t she tie her hair #justsaying

Now back to the Neil’s crazy fam, where the only other person with sense, Anjali2.0 has also said to her dad, that Neil was always right about him 

Yesss gurlll, give it back to him

She’s telling him off how he forego his religious beliefs for her, but why can’t he do the same for Neil

I actually like her so much and the way she’s written

She’s also telling him how she tried to make sure that Neil never felt their mother’s absence (a responsibility she didn’t to take up), because her dad never let Neil feel loved 

OMG SIS SAID THAT BY BEING HEAD PRIEST, YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN YOUR DUTY AS A FATHER AND SHE DID NOT STUTTER 

Everyone is shook (including me)

I was not expecting her to give her father an ultimatum

So she said, that if he does not give Neil and Meera his blessing, he will see her dead 

OMGGG WHYYYAYFOIHFBEI THE ANXIETY 

Episode 9

We’ve begun with some cuteness regarding her rubbing flour all over face 

And like the idiot he is, he’s told her that her face is completely clean 

OMGGG HE’S GUIDING HER HANDS 

HOLY SHIT SISSS IS ALREADY IMAGINING HERSELF BEING MARRIED TO HIM 

Like same, but I also cannot 

Also I’m lolling at the fact she’s imagining their Nikaah, like his family won’t kill him for that

OMG THIS DICKHEAD HAS GIVEN THE CAKE HE MADE FOR HER DAD TO THE GAREEB CHILDREN LIKE SHE GAVE HIS SANGORIA TO THE GAREEB CHILDREN 

Awww I spoke too soon, she left the cake at the shop and he was just messing with her 

Guysss I really love their chemistry

He said that he won’t sit behind her, coz he doesn’t sit behind girls *rolls eyes*, but she’s not having it and reminded him that she beat him in a motorcycle race so he should suck it up

And they’ve had their first ‘accidental’ pressed up on each other fall 

A trope I do love with all my heart  

NOW HE’S COVERING HIS CHEST LIKE HIS IZZAT HAS BEEN LOOTED 

I’m hoping that Shyam1.5 isn’t as bad as his predecessors, but I do realise that is wishful thinking coz the couple scene where he talks to Saraswati was quite sweet

OMG THERE’S AN INTRUDER IN THEIR HOUSE AND I REALLY DON’T WANT SARASWATI TO GO CHECK, AND I’M FREAKING OUT 

She’s found Naveli’s earrings on the ground, Shyam1.5 and her are having an affair aren’t they

I FUCKING KNEW THAT NAVELI WAS SUSS AND SO WAS THIS HARAMKHOR SHYAM1.5 

I AM SO GROSSED OUT RN, WHAT IS SHE 10 YEARS OR MORE YOUNGER THAN HIM 

OMG HE’S ACTUALLY YUCK, LIKE SHYAM WAS YUCK BUT AT LEAST KHUSHI WASN’T HIS SAALI

AND WHAT TYPE OF COUSIN DOES THAT 

Saraswati please go fuck him up 

OMG OMG OMG YEH PADA THAPPAD!!!!!!! 

Well that’s another week done

[yeunbins]

till dusk, till dawn

➳ summary: in apocalyptic world, is there a chance for you to find love?

➳ genre: apocalyptic!au

➳ a/n: gif creds goes to @hayoonbin! this was requested by annonue and i got too carried away writing it and uGh i love it so much!! kinda inspired by multiple zombie movies esp. the walking dead!

“mom, what are those?” your voice quivered in fear. You see your mom stagger up the stairs and run towards your room. she grabs a backpack from your closet and stuffs clothes, the first aid kit, and water in it. “mom answer me!” you cried out loud. “run and never look back” her voice boomed. You look at her crying face in confusion. she shows her arm which revealed a bite mark. you run up to her and sobbed. You felt her stroke your hair in a loving manner. “I love you, sweetie” she says truthfully as your mom feels herself turning. the bangs downstairs got louder and louder. “mom please” you sobbed. your mom suddenly grabs a pistol. “mom.. what are you doing?” you asked in panic. “after I fire this gun, promise me you will take this and run” she looks at you dead in the eye “no mom!” you tried to stop her but its too late. she pulled the trigger. “ MOM!!” you screamed in agony.

you woke up from your daydream when you heard a clunk at the other side of the store. In a hurry, you grabbed the canned goods and other necessities you needed and shoved them in your bag. you stealthily paced around the store to check where the sound came from. you peeked over at the shelves to see a zombie. Not wasting any more time, you threw your army knife at his head. you watched the zombie fall to the ground. you look down at the zombie with your knife on its head. “poor guy” you say out loud. you pulled the knife from his head and ran out of the convenience store.

running out the store, you were greeted with the fresh air with the smell of rotting bodies. you were used to this kind of lifestyle by now. killing zombies here and there, finding abandoned houses in the rich subdivisions or in the villages to sleep in. your main “home” as you called it was in the forest. you knew your way in and out of the forest in your town. though there are still some parts of it to be discovered. you are now headed to the front and you see a hoard of zombies ahead of your direction. you didn’t bring attention to yourself by walking cautiously. even if there was a zombie in front of you, you would just stab them on the head.

—

it was just a regular day at the treasure base. asahi, yoshinori, and jaehyuk were getting down from the watch towers from their night shift. byunggon calls everyone to the dining area for their daily meeting. “any news?” byunggon asks everyone who was still in a sleepy state. “nothing from the night before hyung” asahi reports. “hmm. I guess that’s like a daily thing now” seunghun comments.

as everyone was busy reporting the activities from the dag before, byunggon checks the members attendance. “where’s mashiho?” byunggon asks. “in the kitchen hyung!” yedam answers. byunggon noticed the meeting was awfully quiet.

“where’s jihoon, junkyu, and the rookie?” as on cue, the three stumble together at the door. “present.. for duty.. hyung” junkyu tries to hold in his laughter.

keyword: tried.

Byunggon massaged his temples at the three. “So, what are we-“ “hyung we ran out of food!” mashiho runs in. “NO FOOD?!” hajeongwoo exclaim in sync. “WHAT!?” junkyu screams in a high voice. “everybody listen up!” seunghun slams his fist against the metal table. all The boys stopped what they were doing. “thanks bro” byunggon bumps his fist with seunghun seunghun. “no problem” seunghun grins. “anyway, since we’re out of food, jihoon, junkyu, and the rookie here,” byunggon points at the three. “you three will scout for our food” he finishes. “great! we’re gonna go outside again” jihoon laughs, “and we try not to get killed yeehaw!” junkyu adds but ruins the mood. both leaders, byunggon and seunghun facepalm. “just head over to doyoungie and hyunsukie’s station to get your guns.” seunghun sighs. “copy that!”

“we’re in scouting duty again!” junkyu giggles. “ yep. but its our rookie’s first misson” jihoon coos at yoonbin, who just vaguely smiles a bit. “ aw come on, rookie! loosen up a bit” Jihoon throws his hand over yoonbin’s shoulder. “come on, guys. It’s not the time to—what was that?” rustling was heard. the three boys gripped their guns tightly against their chest.

—

you are now walking through the forest. just feeling the cold breeze hit your skin brings you relaxation or peace despite living in a apocalyptic world where the dead wants to eat you alive. your train of thought was cut short when you heard voices nearby. you dropped your bag filled with goods and hid around a tree.

“yo! who would leave this!!” a giddy voice exclaims. “be quiet man! you’re gonna bring us attention!” another voice hushed. “careful, we don’t know if there’s a catch” a deep voice interfers. “please” the other boy scoffs, “like there’s any other—“

he gets cut off by you grabbing a boy and holding a knife against his neck. 2 guns were pointed at you. “drop your weapons” you demanded. they slowly complied and dropped theirs. Even the boy you held hostage dropped his gun.

“who are you and what are you doing here?!” you pointed the knife towards the two boys who were holding their hands up. “i’m jihoon and thats junkyu” jihoon points to the guy beside him. “the one you held hostage is yoonbin” he then points to the boy you’re holding. “we’re scouting for food for our base” he explains.

“what base? there aren’t any bases here!” you raise your brow at the two boys. as you try to get information from them, you didn’t notice yoonbin who took the opportunity to flip you around. so now you’re the one who’s held hostage. “FUCK!” you yelped

“oH MY GOD DUDE DID YOU SEE THAT?! BYUNGGON HYUNG IS GONNA BE SO HAPPY AND SHOCKED” junkyu jumps. “guess we’re taking you hostage, lady” yoonbin whispers in your ear. “we’re gonna take your food if you don’t mind!” jihoon smiles as he grabs your little duffle bag filled with canned goods. “FUCK OFF THAT’S MINE” you trashed around yoonbin’s arms. “not anymore~” junkyu says in a sing song voice. “c’mon rookie. let’s head back now” jihoon commands. yoonbin pushed you harshly and now you four were walking to their base.

–

“you’re back early– whO IS THAT?!” jeongwoo screams over the intercom. “a stranger danger that’s what” jihoon mumbles enough for you to hear. you kicked jihoon’s ass which caused him to yell in pain. “DUDE! control her! she kicked my ass!” jihoon complained. “literally” junkyu joked. you snap your head at him and gave him a glare. “sorry” he says quickly. “you’re quite feisty aren’t you” yoonbin tries to give you a small talk, only for you to give him your best death glare. “cool” he replies.

you were now walking to the front door. their base reminded you of an army base with all the wires and metal doors everywhere. not to mention the watch towers and all that. “hyung! we found another civilian!” junkyu reports. “this time she’s a bit hostile” jihoon whispers over to byunggon. “where is she?” byunggon asked the two. “she’s with the rookie. oh my god hyung like he did a backflip and shit and the girl can’t do anything!” junkyu blabbered.

“it’s a girl?! hyunsuk and seunghun both piped up. “yeah–“ before jihoon could finish his sentence, byunggon, seunghun and hyunsuk ran off to where yoonbin was guarding you.

–

“you know, you could always let go of me right?” you smile fakely at yoonbin who’s still holding your arms together. “no can do. you’re hostile as fuck” he comments. “what the fuck is that supposed to mean?!” you start to raise your voice. “this is exactly why i can’t let you go” he counters. you huff at your place and try to find something to distract him. you spot an ajar door. an idea came into mind.

“oH MY GOD LOOK THERE MIGHT BE A ZOMBIE” you screamed. yoonbin got startled, “WHERE?!” he looks around frantically. taking this as an opportunity that he’s distracted, you ran away from him. “wha– come back here!” he yells. you sprinted faster but he’s catching up.

‘for a rookie they’re talking about, he’s pretty good’ you thought to yourself. you were now running around a goddamn table. you hear yoonbin ‘tsked’ and slid over to your side. “FUCK DUDE IT AINT THAT SERIOUS” you cry out as you ran faster than ever.

he finally catches up and tackles you to the ground. “you aren’t going anywhere” he says coldly. “yeah i am” you argue as you fight against him. “do you ever give up?” he pants as he tries to block your attacks. “nope, never” you smile. suddenly you felt something prick you. “ow!” you pushed yoonbin off of you as you felt yourself getting dizzy. “wha– the” you slurred. the last thing you remember was falling and you feel yourself being lifted and you’re out like a light.

—

you jolt up from the hard bed. hitting your head angst a shelf in the process. “fuCK!” you cursed loudly. “she’s awake!” you hear an unfamiliar voice call out. suddenly, a group of boys scrambled inside the room. “oh wow” one comments. “oh no she has a bruise forming” another comments. “i got the ice” another announces. “damn rookie what did you do to her” one jokes and the whole group broke into laughter.

“who the fuck are you guys” you ask them. “damn, you’re right hoon. she’s feisty as shit!” a blonde boy exclaims. “told ya” jihoon’s familiar voice echoed in the room.

“hello! i’m byunggon. i’m the group’s leader. you’re at our base. you are another civilian we found around the area!” byunggon introduces himself. “here around me are the other civilians me and seunghun found.” he points to a tall boy who’s smiling like a dad.

“this is hyunsuk, yedam, jaehyuk, doyoung, yoshinori and asahi” he points to the boys behind him. “and you already met those three” he then points to jihoon, junkyu and yoonbin who was leaning against the doorframe.

“i know what you feel right now. so we’ll give you time to take in everything.” byunggon puts a hand on your shoulder. “mashiho, make her some food. yedam, give her an ice pack” he looks at mashiho and yedam who were standing outside. “got it hyung!” they say. byunggon stands up and walks over to jihoon, junkyu and yoonbin.

“you three, watch over her incase she plans anything funny” byunggon whispers to the three. “nah hyung, let’s just leave it to the rookie here” jihoon teases yoonbin. “fuck off” yoonbin rolls his eyes. junkyu winked at byunggon hoping he got the idea. byunggon looked like he was about to laugh.

“okay then, rookie, watch over her for tonight” byunggon smirks at yoonbin who groaned and threw death glares at the two idiots. “bye~” they waved as they ran for their lives after leaving the room.

you watched as mashiho placed down a plate filled with food. you looked at him and mouthed a quick ‘thank you’ he shows you a toothy grin and walks off together with yedam who shyly gave you the ice pack. they both ran off and closed the door right after. you were now laying down at the bed with your hand holding an ice pack against your forehead.

“for someone who’s gonna watch over me, you don’t talk much” you comment at yoonbin who’s just standing at the corner with a gun. “just doing what i’m told to” he replies. you scoffed, “yeah right, sure”

“why won’t we start with the basics, like introducing ourselves. hey! that’s a good idea” you open up a conversation. you hear yoonbin sigh, “fine. what’s your name?” he asks. you gasp and put your hand over your chest. “i thought you’d never ask!” you say. he rolls his eyes at you. “anyway i’m y/n” you smile at him.

after hours of just talking about anything, yoonbin hears your breathing go steady. indicating you have already fallen asleep. he quietly tip toes outside where he could leave you asleep in peace. he closed the door quietly as he could. suddenly, a hand grabbed his shoulder. “hey rookie” it was byunggon.

“hey.. uh hyung” yoonbin smiles politely at the leader. “i see that you did something earlier with our new comer huh” he smiles at yoonbin. ‘oh no, is this going somewhere’ yoonbin thinks to himself. “i need you to be with her for a few days. like give her a tour and all that shit. make sure she has something to do. is that okay?” byunggon asks. ‘fuck’ he thought. knowing he can’t say no to gon, he agrees. “okay” byunggon smiles widely, “ey! that’s our rookie! get some rest, you have a long day ahead of you” byunggon pats his chest.

yoonbin walks through the long hallways as he goes to his room. his room was kinda small but it has a bed and that’s all what matters. his neighbors are mashiho and seunghun. who are both busy everyday. he drops his gun on the floor, he opens the small closet and changes into his hoodie and sweats. he crawls to his bed, making himself comfy. once he’s adjusted, yoonbin sighs before being knocked out cold.

[tellywoodtrash]

kasautii zindagii kay 25.09.18 lb

don’t expect these regularly. pehli ep dekh rahi hoon toh kar rahi hoon. first impressions and all. will be watching this show veryyyyy sporadically.

also, i went and watched the first ep of the original before this to revive memories and do an accurate comparison.

lmaoooooo i’d forgotten and kinda missed ekta’s predilection to start every show with SUCHHHHHHH gratuitous shots of bhagwan.

show kolkata mein based hai toh mumbai ka siddhivinayak mandir kyun dikha rahe ho?

but also some durga maa shots and the bengali ululation to reassure us ki haan haan, kolkata mein hi hai.

lol just look at the sizeeeeeeee of that “middle class” house.

watching an ekta show after agessssss and discovering all the little balaji quirks are still intact is a trip and a half.

waah re, exaaact same aarti as the original they’re using. nice.

oh i realllllly appreciate the little captions telling us the name of each character. coz this show has tooo fucking many. and i could never keep track of them in the original.

idhar already attempt to establish anurag as hero. ki dekho dad takkkkk is late to aarti, but bhai apna has already started.

MAN THESE FAMILIES ARE TOO BIG. HOW MANY DAMN KIDS YOU PPL BE HAVING??????????????

oh ho ho shekhar has a cuteeeeeeeee smile.

mohini ji toh abhi bhi 2002 paro waale hangover mein hain.

i really love this actress (shubhavi chouksey) tho. she plays balance of bitchhhhh and weepy bits quite well.

also lol i still remember her “mihirrrrrrrjiiiiiiii” from kyunki.

really relate with her being 1000% done with her husband. excuse me sir, aap bhi late hi aayein hain. you get no moral superiority points.

this chick is still asleep????????

there’s no fucking way you ppl (prerna, and whoever this jogging chick is) can get ready in time before aarti ends. 

oh no. jogger girl does notttttttttttttt look good. waaaaaaaaayyyy too OTT. like not in a fun way like mohini or komolika. in a fire your stylist way.

oh it’s nivedita.

wtfffffffffffff is anupam wearing my god. it’s like one of those silver rescue blankets but in florescent orange. jesus.

anupam still a dgaf cartoon here also. cool. 

tapur’s just rolling innnnnnnnn. also lol at her passive aggressive snark smile.

MY GOD THIS AARTI IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. IT’S CLOCKED IN AT OVER 6 MINUTES ALREADY. MATLAB BHAGWAAN KO AUR BHI KAAM HAI MY DUDES, POORE DIN TUMHARI IS AARTI MEIN HI BAITHE RAHEIN KYA??????

also what kinda fucking upper body strength does anurag have to keep going like this????? need no arm workout for the rest of the week.

um prerna, wearing paayal jhumka and all that is not the priority rn. JUST GET YOUR ASS DOWN THERE SO THIS NEVER-ENDING AARTI CAN FINISHHHHHH.

poooore suit se zyaada kapda iske dupatte mein lagta hai.

yeah these two are just toooooooo bland looking for my taste.

blah blah blah waqt issues.

ok so these guys don’t even have to do any work in writing the show. literallly just taking alllllllllll the dialogues from the original, huh.

anurag is a real stick in the mud, taking the ladoo back from his dad. asshole.

yeah i can already tell shubhavi is gonna act circles around the rest of this cast. multiple times.

this show is just maaaaaaade for the negative characters to shine, over the boring goody-goodies.

ok i’d forgotten how irritating erica’s voice is. she sounds like she’s perpetually phlegmy.

CHEATER PRERNAAAAAAAAAAA. original mein phool apne aap gira tha. chal jhooti. koi khaas dosti nahi hai teri bappa ke saath.

weird how they didn’t bother covering up erica’s cross tattoo. prerna sharma would never have a tattoo.

props to daddy sharma for being progressive papa and not seeing beti as bhoj.

blah blah blah humaari beti kitniiiiii pyaaari hai nonsense.

pft moloy and his dumbassery.

lmao “classes. business management.” who talks like this? who says the name of their degree/major when their mom asks where they’re going?

............ which parent in this day and age would resist their kid going to fucking college????? lol get real. a business family like this would push their kid to get an mba for fucking sure.

ok his voice is just as, if not even more, annoying than erica’s.

i won’t be surprised if mohini spits in moloy’s chai every now and then. he’s kinda asking for it.

bhaaaaaaaaaari cgi on college building. achcha hai, anyway script likhne mein paise ki bachat hui hai, toh ispe hi kharch kardo.

prerna’s friend is a horndog.

lol “JERSEY mein dikhta hai” as if it’s something great. kabhi aarti ke time jao uske ghar pe. tab shirtless hota hai.

ok this is creeeeeepy as fuck how all the girls are peeping into the boys’ locker room. just think how it’d look if it was reversed.

pehchaan waala hai toh why is she looking at him like it’s the first time??? yaa pehli baar “jersey mein” dekha hai?

jeeeeee bhar ke taadne ke baad, bol rahi hai “mujhse nahi hoga” lol, ok.

prerna’s friend has acquired another suitably horndog companion.

oh greatttttttttttttttt, casual homophobic statement. first of many, no doubt.

why is this chick getting SOOOOOOOO hyper about prerna/anurag talking? calm thy tits, madam.

OH GOD THEY’RE EVEN RECREATING THIS NONSENSE SCENE FROM THE ORIGINAL, WHERE THIS RANDOM DUDE PREDICTS THE CONVERSATION. IT’S SOOOOOOOOO DATED AND LAME AS A STORY-TELLING DEVICE. CRINGE!MAXXXX

wow, bothhhhh their annoying voices together is truly mind-numbingly grating.

ALSO MY GOD THIS IS THE MOST BORING CONVERSATION EVER.

prerna has the same oh god kahan phas gaye face that i have rn watching this.

ouff random expository dialogue on aane waala toofaaan.

this random bystander needs to shut up with his commentary and predictions. mostly coz he’s so wrong.

annoying horndog’s name is saloni. and she’s being annoying some more, this time towards prerna.

my god who the fuck is like ‘omg don’t tell me you DIDN’T fuck him’ to a total random stranger, in the very first convo they have with them??????? saloni needs to learn how to interact with ppl in polite society.

prerna like sorry, i don’t like rational men. lol good luck with that. it should reallllllly serve you well in life.

AND NOW SALONI’S LIKE CAN YOU FIND OUT IF ANURAG’S STRAIGHT?????? OMFG THIS CHICK IS REALLY ASKING FOR A JHAPPAD. 

AND PRERNA’S LIKE OK I’LL TRY. JFC.

seems like papa sharma has seen band baaja baarat too many times, ki anushka ki “vyaapaar aur pyaar” waali baat kuch zyaada hi dil pe le li.

15 lakh ka loan for what exactly?

ouff khudddaari dialogue. itniiiiiiii khuddaari hai toh loan bhi mat liya karo?

yeah mohini is srslyyyyyy just taking all her styling inspiration straight from 2002 devdas.

moloy is getting on my last damn nerve. 

the dubbing of this show is really bad. at some points the mouths are just moving completeeeeeeely outta sync with the sound.

i really like prerna’s mom. 

yes yes we got it, sabse bada pandaal yahi hai. you have convinced us.

i don’t get ppl who live in india and have zero patience for random things like roadblocks. like.... this is just how life IS here????? stop being a dick. itni jaldi hai, toh fucking get out and walk the 3 extra steps.

ouff prerna and her manic pixie-ness. i’m so tired of this HAR WAQT PHUDAKTI MACHALTI type heroines, who are unable to keep the ~~~excitement of lifeeeeeeeee~~~~ inside themselves and are constantly squirming.

lol the way mohini’s face instantly changed on having to interact with middle class person.

lmaooooooooo i’ve read a lot about erica and her weird way of saying “auntyji” and i finally get it.

.... why is she interrupting mohini’s conversation with her friends with her random tippani on anurag? unka beta hai, jo chaahe kahe; kissi ne tumse raaiii maangi?

damn, that was cold how she just abruptly walked away tho.

chandrika looks like SHE’s the one who came here in the back of a tempo, instead of prerna, who has not oneeeee hair outta place.

lol prerna’s mom is like hmph my daughter is soooo much better.

some more time waste on establishing just how big pandaal is.

pregnancy ki complications ki wajaah se mummy is STILL babying onuuuu, like 25 years later. waah bhai. jai ho aisi moms ki. inka bas chale toh umbilical cord kaate hi na.

nivideta waali actress’s hair and makeup is really doing nothing for her. esp. the hair. it’s making her forehead look bizarre. like i get she’s supp to be OTT, poonam was too in the original, but it suited her. this here is just not working.

some more casualllllll misogyny from moloy.

foreshadowing regarding prerna being anurag’s own personal toofaan.

mohini cannot stand a middle class girl even being within a 10 ft radius of precious baby boiiii. kahin uske exhalation par middle class waale co2 molecules na pad jaaye mere onuuuuuu pe!

they really need to put a flashing images warning on this show.

lmao tapur’s sheeeeeeer discomfort at being made to do aarti. #relatable

mohini’s not happpppppy ki prerna kahin se ghus aayi hai to do aarti. aadat daal lo AuNTyJiiiiiiiii. ab toh yeh har jagah ghusne waali hai.

ppl pray for peace of mind and this dumbass here is asking for a toofaan in her life. well i hope you’re ready, miss thang. coz this is going to be the last peaceful day of your godforsaken life. good luck.

thank god mohini didn’t see raja beta touching the hand of a mere commoner.

ANJALI IS STILL CAUGHT UP ON THIS BS.

AND OMG PRERNA ARE YOU SRSLY GONNA DO THIS???????

prerna, are you trying to find out if he’s straight, or signal to him ki you’re gay???? coz your opening line on how many cute girls there are here sounds like the latter.

.... i can’t believe she just asked him that. srsly. how the fuckkkkkkk is it any of your business?

god her verbal diarrhea. girl please stop.

yeah i really won’t be able to watch this show because her voice is just.... intolerable.

“haan mujhe ladke pasand hai. i like boys.”

pls. i wish. this would be an infinitely interesting show then. those would be some real kasautiiis. trying to navigate indian society in every way as a non-hetero.

“gooooood choice. baaaad luck.”

lol at least he has a sense of humour.

pffffffffffffffft.

i don’t like these nonsense gay jokes but this kinda felt like a befitting reply to her dumbass intrusive question.

mohini really rude af. but i also kinda admire her attitude of not dealing with ppl she doesn’t want to. i wish i had it.

LE YEH PHIR AA GAYI ISKE PAAS.

at least she’s apologizing.

WHAT IS WITH THESE TWO AND ONLY TALKING ABOUT THE WEATHER. JFC. SO BORING.

some pretty heavyyyyyyyyyyy handed exposition re: mahishasura.

who dis character tho??????

ouff too much dramatics with the sharaab ki bottal phodna and pandit ki commentary and the chunari over those two. it’s alll TOO MUCH.

lo shahrukh bhi aa gaya gyaan dene.

MY GOD WHY IS HE AGING LIKE THIS JFC IT’S LIKE WITNESSING MY CHILDHOOD DECOMPOSE IN FRONT OF MY VERY EYES.

overall impression

production values and all are amazing, as expected. the two actresses playing the moms are the best. the fathers are that special desi dad brand of benevolently annoying. the leads have zeroooooooooooo personality and appeal for me though. they’re just too bland and boring (like, that ~*SPARK*~ shweta tiwari had???? sorely missing.) too early to tell about chemistry right now, but they both really need to work on their dialogue delivery, because my god, it’s truly the worst (esp. erica’s.) the only draw of this show for me personally is mohini and komolika’s bitchery, and that isn’t a good enough reason for me to watch it regularly and put up with the rest of these characters. like i’ve said before, maybe someone who hasn’t watched the original would enjoy this, but i’m mostly meh. i’ll keep up with updates and like, check in and watch an ep or two occasionally but overall, naaah.

[mexicoetc]

'Jack Teacher, is time real or is it an illusion?' - Ji-hoon (8 years old)

I went with the hagwon job - location, energy, and mornings - over the kindergarten job - money, soul, and evenings. What with the director’s slightly cryptic emails I wasn’t 100% sure I’d been officially offered the position, so I emailed the American woman who works there and who’d conducted my Skype interview. She was like, ‘Yeh, you’ve got the job. The director trusts my recommendations, and you were the best candidate.’ I asked how many she’d interviewed. She said eight . . I beat all those cunts to it? Really? . . Oh yeh, that’s right: I am capable of making a good impression, especially if the target’s got a brain in their canister. I’d forgotten that, after three years of having my every social interaction lambasted, being called a sociopath, told to 'be nicer’, smile more, laud the vapid, shun the mercurial, French-kiss sophistry, take reason round back and shoot it in the head etc etc.

So tango classes. I booked two ninety-minute private lessons with this very short bald Irish man called Gerry, whose accent had softened to near nonexistence after 16 years teaching tango here, and what I guess was his wife, a dark-skinned and skeletal Argentinian woman called Lucía, who had an infectious but also lunatic smile, and was incidentally the oldest person I’ve ever seen wearing braces - both more than lovely and utterly recommendable.

I’ve done things where the footwork was important before (boxing, hapkido) so working through wiring steps into my muscle memory wasn’t anything new, but when I was asked to do it to the beat of the music, that was. I don’t even know what it means when people say that. I have zero grasp. The fact that my grandad could play the piano by ear is incomprehensible to me. Gerry said that that’s simply not having the confidence to feel the dance rather than think it. And he might have been right. I knew and said to them that in my case confidence was probably more than half the battle, that if I could just feel comfortable moving around and doing simple steps, that would make me happier than if I was actually good at tango but still loath to do it. Gerry said I could get to that level in a few months if I kept learning in Korea, because I was picking it up much quicker than most, and I thought, Come on mate, lies make baby Jesus cry.

It was obvious from the first ninety minute class that tango is something that would take years of assiduity to get any good at. The way Gerry would say, 'Push her with your hand,’ and then when I did that, add, 'When we say push we don’t mean push.’ Oh fucking hell mate: pick up your socks, don’t pick your nose; treat me like a princess, treat me like a whore; do as I say, don’t be a pushover. It’s fine, I get it. I wouldn’t be able to explain how to put a pass on someone’s toe from twenty-five yards, or score a one-on-one, or pot a difficult black. I’d be like, 'Think but don’t think.’ And how long did it take for me to be able to do those things? Well football was all I did every lunchtime from about age 8 to age 16, and as far as I remember I played pool at least two hours a day all the way through year 8 and 9 under the tutelage of the hilarious and psychotic Andy Hardy, who had a full-sized snooker table in his house and whom I personally saw hit breaks of over 50 at least ten times; who got me so good that we used to hustle the year 11’s.

I did notice a little more fluidity in my movements during the second class, which was cool, and I decided to do a third class with all these other couples, after which we would all go to a Milonga. Last night, watching the couples galumphing around crippling each other’s toes in the dancehall of a rundown terrace whose caretaker looked like a thallium-spiked Jeremy Irons, I thought that maybe Gerry hadn’t been lying when he said I was picking it up quickly. Then again, I’d been dancing with him and Lucía, and they were probably elevating me. For all of the couples it was their first class and I kept being referred to by the teachers as 'the expert’ amongst them. Every time they said it I went rubicund with shame, thinking, Please stop saying ludicrous things that make everyone turn to me. I might die. I might die.

The Milonga was cool (free booze), but watching the ordinary people dancing incredibly on the floor - the commonplace, the lanky, the squat, the potbellied, even the frankly ugly - made sexy by their confidence and grace was quite depressing personally. Whenever I learn something, at whatever stage of learning I’m at, the nice sense of progress is always tainted somewhat by the regret that I didn’t learn it earlier. Boxing and hapkido: 'Why didn’t I learn this when I was eight? That way I wouldn’t have gone through school perpetually terrified that one day everyone might suddenly work out I only looked psychotic.’ Even though, as my dad said, 'But they never did, did they.’ Korean: 'Why didn’t I learn a weird language when I was in my teens busy cursing the waste of time every other subject was apart from literature and history? I’d be bilingual by now.’ Tango: 'Why didn’t I learn to dance as soon as I was aware that dancing was the thing most mortifying to me, i.e. fucking donkey’s years ago?’

It would be quite tempting to end this blog by miserably repeating what the amazingly named Benny Profane says in Thomas Pynchon’s V before he disappears from the chaotic narrative: 'Offhand I’d say I haven’t learned a goddamn thing.’ I mean, outside of my Central American capitals, which I confess were shaky, I haven’t; my Spanish has gotten worse; I’ve had most stereotypes reinforced; I’ve continued to use Tinder even after my first experience showed that after fucking a girl I don’t like or even know, even if she’s hot, I get back home hollow as hollow can be, thinking, God, I wish I was dead. However, I began this blog by saying that time doesn’t exist, but that it’s hard to concur when you’re swamped with regret, and I’m finding it hard to concur again, because time allegedly heals all wounds, and during these last four months a lot of healing has gone on. I’ve slit myself open with razors and wrung out accumulated poisons; I’ve sat quite still and thought myself to madness; I’ve walked and walked; my plantar fasciitis has disappeared; from my writing, the painful cliches and mundane longueurs and strained metaphors and precocious phrases and alliteration for its own sake have all been sniffed out, extracted, and liquidated without trial.

How can healing have gone on if I haven’t learnt anything? It’s possible to do so (I could fix my plantar fasciitis then aggravate it again, or get into another toxic relationship), but in this case I feel the answer is that of course learning has gone on, only it hasn’t been anything to do with the Americas - these places have merely provided the temporal and spatial dislocation that facilitates it … I can’t go back to 1999 and learn to fight and speak Chinese and dance, but I can go back to Korea. And now, having learned a little about myself and how I related to that country, I feel I deserve another crack. It started off so well, and I got as lost as I wanted to, but then I got so lost I lost myself. I got bitter, and rallied too much against things that didn’t matter. I’m not gonna do that anymore. I’ll do the peace sign in photos, I won’t get annoyed when people ask me if I’m cold, if a girl I’m dating wants us to wear identical t-shirts, I’ll just do it. It’ll be a return exactly four years on from when I first arrived - similar job, similar circumstances - and I feel that this time it won’t be John Terry taking the fifth penalty, but Didier Drogba.

[tellywoodtrash]

bepannaah 19.03.18 lb

right. let’s do this. entertain me, ridiculously good looking ppl.

oh fuck what, is this a one hour show? please tell me it’s just for the first ep, coz i’ve already lost interest if this is a one hour daily. i don’t have the strength to keep up with this kinda bs.

god, it’s unfair how pretty this girl is. honestly.

seems like has god has compensated by giving her a real besuraaa voice tho. bb girl, pls stop.

oh god she’s one of those ‘aaaap’ and ‘hum’ ppl.

also weirdly codependent on her husband for weird shit like remembering song lyrics? ok???????

what exactly is this hot mess that she’s making???? somewhere in an alt universe, omkara singh oberoi’s chest hurts from the violation of “art” that’s happening here.

lel “hum aapka jhoot hamesha pakad lete hai” foreshadowingggggggg

hubba hubba who this mancakeeeee. chehra dikhaa jaanemann!

haaaaaaaaaaye his puppy eyes. such cyooot.

hmmmmmm this one’s wife is sick of playing mom to him within 3 minutes of show starting.

… is she not wearing a blouse????

ok no i see flashes of it.

lmao this pettyass child, threatening to go to a different continent, just so he can get chain ki neend.

why is she in such a panicccccc coz she can’t find yash??? aadmi hai, billi toh nahi, jo darwaaza khula chod diya toh kho jaayega.

god what a motley crew of nonsense naukar??

ok fwding this stupid comedy bit about her “art”

lo aa gaaya gareebon ka varun dhawan.

actually he looks like lovechild of varun dhawan and vatsal sheth. and naman shaw. (remember him???) or something.

here this actual man child is still sulking. now over toothpaste or some shit.

wow his mom just sauntered right into the loo. like, do ppl in tellywood just not have any issues with walking into the loo when someone else is there or what? i’d scream the fucking house down.

great he forgot her bday. idiot.

oh he’s arnav singh raizada type - making a habit of forgetting every year. baaad husband! bad!

the dubbing of this ep is realllly off and it’s bothering me.

he filmyyyy. lol. i like.

ooooooh. diaryyyyyyyyy. this is gonna come in play laterrrrrrr.

“bachpan se teri diary dekhta aa raha hoon”

oh ho, they’re bachpan ke saathi and all that. interesting.

damn girl, loook guiltierrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

also, writing your secrets in a diary is the dumbest shit ever? like, why would you leave a paper trail, so easy to access? its 2018, put it on a private blog or some shit.

ok he didn’t read it. but he’s gonna. you just wait, he gonna read that thing before her body goes cold.

pooja is a scorpio forsho. hella relate to her secretive, none-of-your-damn-business ways.

oh greatttttttttt, he’s another omkara singh oberoi with the whole I HATE LIES bs

god, this woman is still hung up on her bhaddaaaa sa sculpture thing.

lol her hubs is like plz, no more. lord give the spouses of “artists” patience, coz honestly, they’re tiresome af.

he’s also an aap hum dude. i think i like aditya’s way of talking better.

yeah that i love you of his rang realllllllllllll hollow.

oh ho ho. zoya here is stealing tricks from the shivaay singh oberoi book of romance, holi chapter.

“zoya mere kapde gande ho jayenge.” “toh phir utaar dijiyega.”

OH SNAAAAAAAAAAAAP I LIKEEEEEEEEEE.

damn, she just insinuated getting dirrrrrty and then cleaning up together later.

YEAH GIRL. BE SEX POSITIVE AND TAP THAT BOOTY.

i mean, i’d rather you tap that other one’s fine booty, but abhi ke liye yeh bhi chalega.

smartphones are a curse upon modern day relationships.

… bro you’re indian. you don’t get dubai visa that easily in spur of moment. you gotta apply for that shit in advance. go to qatar. visa on arrival for indians these days.

oh that was HER mom, not his???? that makes the bathroom intrusion even weirder and creepier. like damn saasumaa, boundaries.

LMAO HE CUTE AF

oh ho, hint of financial issues. he borrows money from her? she’s the richer one? interestinggggg.

she’s an artist too? what exhibition???

god he’s sooooooooo cute. also their little head tilt thing was adorbs. i def like these two as a couple better.

why is she so uncomfortableeeee with him? this is not the face you make when a husband this hot is attempting to feel ya up. girl you shady affff.

yuppppppp she def has some resentment at him not growing tf up.

ooooooooh "mujhse zyaada tumhe koi pyaar nahi karega!!!!" and all. and pooja seems hella uncomfy. which is fair. these kinda statements are really not as romantic as they’re supposed to seem. they’re more a statement of ownership than love.

at this point i gotta say, i relate with pooja the most in this show so far, and i’m hella sad she gonna be dead soon.

zoya, i get your disappointment and all, but you clingy and whinyyyy af girl.

why is he shaving out in the open? do you ppl not have a bathroom?

gareebon ka varun dhawan thinks being a good husband is listening to wife complain about the naukar. cool. cool cool cool. i hate brown dudes.

gift!

damn girl, calm down. it’s a ring. not cash. i always prefer cash.

oh ho wrong size. pooja size? huhuhuhuhu.

LMAO HE’S SO UNCOMFORTABLE. YOU SHADY FUCK.

damn adi-pooja’s house is huuuuge af. like, they’re not oberoi rich, but definitely hellla fucking rich.

omnious kadamon ka sound. tension-inducing elderly male figure is making entry. is he dad or sasur????

oh this guy. shahid kapoor ka ex step-dad.

dad has Opinions™ on the commute issues of younger couple.

ok mr. hooda. HIS dad.

also, wow. another omkara callback. daddy issues and calling father mr. [surname]

wow, i clearly have “a type” when it comes to tellywood dudes, don’t i????

his mom looks just about as young as his wife, the fuck. like, at most she looks 5 years older than him.

aaaand gareebon ka varun dhawan is offffffff. never to be seen alive again, i presume.

god she clingyyyyyyy af. i don’t really like her character so far.

mmmmm hmmmmmm. love me a man in uniform.

ok he seems to be treating the plane’s PA system like some kinda radio station for himself. nope.

yeah, these fake flying scenes are weird and corny af. fwding.

ok he’s gonna go to mussoorie. because Reasons.

love zoya’s mom for promoting healthy body image. you go mom. i like you.

dad has judgy face af.

lol dadddddd hates yash and thinks he stoopid.

“aapki subhaanAllah pottery.” snort.

lol, i like the sister. she’s so fucking done with her dad’s 5 saal puraana dukhda. get over it already, dad.

dad says issue is not communal. meaning he really knows that yash is shadyyyyyyyy af.

LMAO MAN WHY AND HOW ARE DESI DADS SUCH FUCKING EXPERTS AT DESTROYING YOU WITH THE FEWEST WORDS POSSIBLE

hmmmm hint of some financial issues here also.

damn, the dad really hates yash. what does he know about him that we don’t!?!?!?! SPILL ABBU! SPILL!

ok yup the siddiquis are rich af. driver badi gaadi and all.

oooooh serendipitous meeting time.

the push up level on her bra is kinda ridic. her boobs are practically up in her nostrils.

does every art shop in the world have this obligatory 3D buddha thingy or what????

ok what is this 5 minute waste on them wandering this fucking shop fwd fwd fwd 

oh it’s pooja’s favt song too?

aaaaaaand they both picked it up.

damn boy. you married. stop giving random hottie in the local archies’ heart eyes.

lmaoooooo pack kar dijiye plz and resulting apology.

snort us par in janaaab ka bhi moohtod jawab.

lel. beautiful idiots.

lmao i appreciate his efforts.

��yeh bus ki seat hai kya jispe rumaal phenk di toh seat aapki?” “dekhiye, hum bus mein travel hi nahi karte, toh humein kaise pata hoga???”

lolololol. what logic.

arre waaaaaah. valiant effort by aditya, but zoya knows charlie uncle (and whoever jenny is) and has capitalized on that.

LMAO I LOVE HE’S SPEAKING TO CHARLIE UNCLE AS IF HE KNOWS HIM SINCE FOREVER.

damnnnnnnnn the sexual tension.

LOLOLOL WHICH IS NOW JUST REGULAR TENSION COZ HE THREW MONEY AT HER AND TOOK OFF WITH THE THING. CHOR KAHINKA.

they’re legit running all over the damn city. lord above.

what stamina these two have. jfc.

lol urdu lesson in the middle of conflict.

what’s with gulaal phenking?

oh, just distraction technique.

oh no. phone call time. oh no oh no oh no. didn’t think it would come within this ep itself.

oh yikes car ki kaaafi buriiiiiiii haaalat.

ok fuck anything else, look at this man’s cheekbones. they can cut glass. how unfair. i want. both the man and his cheekbones.

also, this guy has zero questions on why she’s being found dead in mussoorie when she said she was going to chennai? two completely different directions my man. thought you were a pilot and supposed to know where the cities are????

oh shit, gareebon ka varun dhawan DEDDDDDDDDDD.

i mean, i knew it was coming, idk why i’m so shocked.

WHY LORD WHY IS POOJA DEAD TOO? I LIKED HER THE BEST SO FARRRRRRRRR.

aaah man, their grief is hard to watch.

aaaaaaaand

lel his instant face change like BITCH WHAT WERE YOU UP TOOOOOOOO

damn aditya, you reaaaaaaaaallll quick. you just went from shock to anger stage of grief in like under 10 seconds.

even zoya be like what this dude’s deal????? at first, and then she noticed the handssssssss.

ah man my heart is breaking for her. she seems so shockeddddd and brokennnn.

notice contrast in emotions and expressions:

ok BIGGEST QUESTION: how are yash/pooja are still holding hands? like, the car fell into the khaaai, and they most probably died on impact. how the fuck did you extract bodies out of the car like THAT? (or were they pulled out alive and then held hands and proceeded to die?) EXPLAIN TO ME, SHOW. 10 points, show your work. 

oh fuck lots happening in the next ep too, from slapping to angsty grabbing to almost killing to life saving. damn. is this really a one hour show daily????? dude imma be fucking exhausted.