#i wrote some last night but i wanna finish the mini fic i got the ask for tonight and keep working on other stuff tmrrw….

[yandereshingeki]

work was. interesting today

[nothoughtsonlynat]

Human (Natasha Romanoff)

Human: Chapter 1

A/N: Troyes, France is 6 hours ahead of NYC so 7pm there is 1pm in NYC. For the sake of this fic we’re going to pretend that the Battle of New York lasted quite a few hours.

*This is my first ever fic and I wrote it at 3am so bear with me

WARNINGS: swearing; mentions of weapons; violence; panic attack; anxiety; my crappy writing; and I think that’s it (lmk if there’s anything I should add)

Barcelona, Spain; January, 2012:

The repetitive ticking of the clock registered in my brain before my eyes even opened. I didn’t need that clock to know what time it was, of course. It was 4:30 am— the same time I've woken up everyday for the past twenty-five years of my life. I no longer need to wake up this early, yet it’s a habit so deeply engrained in my framework that it’s seemingly unbreakable. I roll out of bed and make my way into the dingy kitchen with light footsteps. With some quick math I figured that I got barely two hours of sleep last night, but that’s more than usual. I started the coffee machine and asked with a sigh, “Would you like some coffee or are you just going to lurk in the corner?”

The leather-clad stranger with an eyepatch stepped up to the kitchen island opposite of me and responded, “I wouldn’t mind a cup. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that you knew I was here.”

“Well, you know what they say about old habits. You got a name?”

“You can call me Fury. We have a lot to talk about, Eight.” I slid him a mug of cheap coffee and gestured for him to take a seat. 

“Then we’d better get started so you can get the hell out of my apartment.” He simply chuckled in response and I could already feel my patience wavering.

Two Hours Later:

“Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division? Really, dude?”

“Yeah, it’s a mouthful. Trust me I know.”

“I’m sorry that you came all this way for nothing, Fury, but there’s no way in hell I'm working for some government spy circus.”

“It’s technically an extra-governmental spy agency-“

“Doesn’t matter. I’m not joining,” I said, cutting him off.

“So, you’re just gonna hop from one shitty apartment to the next until you die? That doesn’t seem like a great life.”

“Better than the one I lived before.”

“You aren’t the person to live in hiding. You’re the person who thrives in the action and lives to kick ass, and we both know it.” When I didn’t respond he continued, “I’ll leave you my card. When you change your mind, which you will, you’ll know where to find me. You don’t have to be the bad guy anymore, Eight.” With that he slid off the stool and left my apartment, leaving me with nothing but my rapidly spiraling thoughts and a black business card.

Troyes, France; May, 2012:

It had been four months since Director Fury came to my apartment in Barcelona. We’d kept in contact and he hasn’t given up on me joining S.H.I.E.L.D.. I'm living in my third apartment since then. Wow…those landlords must really hate me. I was watching the seven o’clock news when I saw something that made me choke on my Cheerios. “An alien invasion?! What the fu-” My Cheerio-muffled exclamation was interrupted by the ring of my burner phone. “Hello?”

“Eight, you watched the news recently?”

“Uh yeah, I'm watching it now. You fighting aliens now, Nicky?”

“Okay first of all, I told you to stop calling me that. Second, yes… aliens. I’m forming a team of…extraordinary people to help protect against these threats and they could really use a hand to finish off this fight.”

“I may be weird as hell but I ain't ‘extraordinary’, Fury. I don’t wanna join your band of misfits.”

“Alright, how about a compromise? You fly your fancy jet here right now and help them out and if you still don’t wanna join once the battle is over, you can go right back to France and I’ll stop bothering you about joining.” After a few seconds of silence I agreed. 

“Fine, but I’m not gonna change my mind. Wait, how do you know about my jet?”

He gave a hearty laugh and said “I know everything, Eight. You should know that by now.”

New York, New York; 96 Minutes Later: 

I flew my jet into the city, making sure to take out a few flying Chitauri in the process. We don’t need to talk about how I got my hands on a German jet that can fly 2100mph. I saw a few interesting characters standing in a circle fighting off an endless sea of aliens. I maneuvered the jet and— wait…is that guy wearing blue tights? Is this what Fury meant by extraordinary? Whatever. I landed in the street about 20 yards away and killed the engines. I hopped out and started jogging towards the group. A couple of them turned around, probably wondering who the hell the chick in the black uniform is and— whoa that’s a beautiful woman. After realizing my steps had literally faltered in a mini gay panic, I slowed to a walk and said “Y’all need a hand?”

“Depends on whose hand it is,” replied the redheaded source of my panic.

“I’m a friend of Fury’s. He practically begged me to come save your asses.”

“Fury doesn’t beg,” she said in a doubtful tone.

“Not typically, but I'm just that awesome. If you don’t believe me then call him up but I’m gonna go kill some aliens.” With that I took off down another street where there was a group of the repulsive bastards. After unloading all of my magazines into Chitauri bodies, I switched to my swords and daggers. After another hour or so of fighting, there were no more aliens in sight. I started jogging toward the rich dude’s tower when I saw said rich dude falling through the rapidly-closing portal. I stopped next to Mr. Blue Tights and the buff blonde guy with the hammer when the big green dude grabbed Mr. Rich Dude from the sky and landed next to us. The green guy yelled, waking Mr. Rich Dude up with a start. “What the hell? What happened? Please tell me nobody kissed me. Except for her, she’s pretty hot,” he said nodding toward me. Just then the redhead jogged over to us and eyed my blood-soaked form from head to toe. 

“See something you like, Red?”

“No. I’m pretty sure I'd be classified as a sadist if I liked the sight of that much blood,” she said with a raise of her eyebrow.

“Yeah that’s fair.” She shook her head at me with a small smirk. There was barely a second of silence when Mr. Rich Dude spoke up. 

“Anybody want shawarma?”

Three Hours Later:

I had gone to the Triskelion after the band of misfits apprehended Loki. Agent Hill showed me where to park my jet and directed me to a room so I could shower and stay the night if I wanted to. I had put on black jeans, a white tee, and a black jean jacket, all of which had been in a to-go bag in my jet. I was toweling off my hair when someone knocked on the door. I opened the door to see none other than the one-eyed-wonder standing there. “What can I do for you, Nicky?”

“The Avengers are being debriefed in Conference Room 6B in ten minutes. You should come.”

“The Avengers? Is that what you’re calling them? That’s cute. But I'm not an Avenger and I don’t want to be an Avenger, so no thanks.”

“You should come anyway.”

“I don’t actually have a choice, do I?”

“You know me so well, Eight,” he said with an amused grin.

I walked into the conference room and the Avengers were already there. Steve Rogers, Clint Barton, Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Thor, and Natasha Romanoff—whose names I learned from Hill— were scattered around a large table, along with Fury. Romanoff eyed me from where she was standing and arched a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at me. I squinted my eyes and wiggled my eyebrows in response, and I could see her stifle a laugh. “What’s your name?” She accompanied the question with a blank expression, which made me feel oh-so-special. 

“That’s a very personal question, Miss Romanoff. Let’s slow the pace, please.”

“You know my name but I can’t know yours? That doesn’t seem fair.”

“The world isn’t fair, Miss Romanoff, and I love a good mystery.”

“If you two are done flirting, we have business to attend to,” interjected Fury.

“Right, my apologies, Nicky.”

“Don’t call me that, Eight.”

After an excruciating 43 minutes and 27 seconds, Fury finally let us leave. I was so close to freedom when that unbelievably sexy voice called to me. “Eight!” Romanoff hastily walked towards me in an effort to catch up.

“Yeah?”

“Is your name actually Eight?”

“If you want it to be.”

“Why are you so damn stubborn?”

“It amuses me, Red.” There was a brief silence during which both of us were trying to figure out if the conversation was over. 

I was about to leave when she continued, “So that’s it? You’re just gonna leave?”

“Well, no. I’m going to stay the night, steal some really expensive jet fuel, and then leave in the morning before Fury can get up my ass about joining his little team.”

She rolled her eyes and responded, “Why won’t you join the Avengers? And why won’t you tell me your real name?”

“It’s just not my style. I’d rather fly solo.”

“You ignored my second question.”

“Then maybe you should take the hint and stop asking.” With that I turned around and started walking away, but a hand on my arm stopped me dead in my tracks. Alarms started going off in my head, and I'm pretty sure Romanoff was saying something to me but I was too caught up in the memories of beatings, punishments, and psychological conditioning to register it. After a few of the longest seconds of my life, the white of my vision cleared up and the voice telling me ‘physical contact is strictly forbidden’ faded into the background. My heart was still hammering in my chest and I was trying to keep my breathing steady despite the inevitable panic attack trying to drag me under, I regained my neutral expression and said. “Sorry, did you say something?”

“Are you okay?” She had a concerned expression and if I wasn’t so blinded with anxiety, I would’ve appreciated how cute the furrow of her eyebrows was.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just gonna turn in. It’s been a long day.” I turned around and walked back to my temporary room at a brutal pace. As soon as the door closed behind me, hot tears raced down my cheeks and I lost the ability to breathe. It was gonna be a long night.

3:21 am:

I finally managed to calm myself down and stop the panic attack after almost four hours. Well, I passed out because I couldn’t breathe but it did calm me down. Trying to sleep would be pointless, so I decided to leave before anyone woke up. I didn’t really have much to pack so I grabbed my duffel bag and left the room. I made it to the corridor attached to the landing pads and ran into the one person I really didn’t want to see. “What are you doing out and about, Red?”

“I’ve got places to be and things to do. Were you just going to sneak out in the middle of the night like a teenager with a rebellious streak?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing, actually. Do you need a ride? Where are you going?”

“Madrid. Fury said I could hitch a ride on another plane that’s headed for Germany.”

“Well I’m going to France if you wanna ride with me. My jet will get you there a lot faster.” She studied me for what felt like way too long, probably debating if I would try to kill her or not. You know how spies are with their trust issues.

“What the hell, why not?”

And that is how I ended up in a jet with “Candy Shop” playing over the speakers and Natasha Romanoff in the copilot seat yelling at me to, and I quote, ‘slow the fuck down.’ “Why would I slow down, you psycho?! That’s the whole damn point of this thing!”

“Where did you even get a German jet this fast?”

“Germany.”

“No shit Sherlock. How did you get it?”

“I went to Germany, stopped in at the local speedy-jet dealership, and walked out with this beauty.”

“Sarcasm is a defense mechanism, you know? You’re only being like this to keep me from seeing the real you. You built walls. You want everyone to think you’re fine when in reality, you’re falling apart.”

“Okay…um…there was no need for that, Dr. Romanoff. I can find my own therapist, thank you very much. And don’t go pretending you’re all healthy in the head, Miss Assassin.” It was quiet for all of five seconds before we both burst into laughter.

Madrid, Spain:

I landed the jet at the local S.H.I.E.L.D. base and killed the engines. Romanoff and I removed our headsets and I stood to help her get her bags. “Welp, I’ll see you around I guess.” I really wasn’t good at this type of thing. Or any social interactions, really. Twenty-four years in a cell will do that to you.

“Will I? See you around, I mean?”

“Um, I don’t really know, honestly. I’m not part of S.H.I.E.L.D. so we won’t just run into each other or anything but…”

“Why won’t you join S.H.I.E.L.D.? I mean what else are you doing?”

“Ohhh, I see. You just love me so much that you don’t want me to leave. You’re gonna miss me so much-” I was cut off when she threw her backpack at my head. “Hey! You’re lucky I caught that! Freaking crazy woman.”

When our laughter died down she said, “Well I should probably go. Thank you for the ride.”

“Of course. Hitchhikers are always welcome aboard my beloved jet.” A small smile appeared on her face and she stepped forward to give me a hug but she must’ve seen my body go rigid because she stepped back. She might’ve said something but the voice in my head was too loud for me to understand her. I don’t know how long it was before I unfroze but when I did, she was gone. I walked to the front of the jet and started the journey to France.

[some-kindofgnome]

august slipped away

i. ii.

Otherwise known as the Thanksgiving fic.

characters: mirio x f!reader

wc: 2.6k

warnings: smut (18+ please!), quirkless AU, angst, Thanksgiving long-distance woes, mirio’s very ugly little subaru

notes: Happy Birthday @drapetomaniac​! I’m so glad I was able to get this finished on time. I’m so grateful to have met you on this lil site, so consider this my birthday gift to you! 💖  This serves as a part ii to my Kinktober fic “with autumn closing in.” It got ANGSTY. I hope you love it.

on the prompt: “It’s November – the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines.” This beautiful line was written by Lucy Maud Montgomery, a wonderful Canadian writer, in her novel Anne of the Island, published in 1915.

MASTERLIST

Mini Prompt Event!

It’s November – the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines.

Despite the traffic, the drive into your hometown’s been remarkably quiet. You’ve hitched a ride with a friend, and with Starbucks in your cupholders and weeks worth of laundry piled into her trunk, you ride back in near-silence.

She knows what’s on your mind as she pulls off the exit, the all-too-familiar sign that marks your hometown sending a rush of anxiety straight to your gut.

You’re not looking forward to this weekend as much as you should be. You miss your family- your parents, your dog, your bedroom- but there’s another gaping question mark that fills the rest of the weekend, too harrowing to ignore.

Mirio.

After a very tearful goodbye at the end of the summer, things were good between you. You texted all the time and called him whenever you could. You even wrote letters back and forth in the first month of the semester. Mirio’s were never decked out in stickers or lavish penmanship like yours were, but they teared you up all the same.

But college is difficult. And you’re both starting this year, so it’s been a lot for both of you to adjust to. You and Mirio always kind of sailed through high school without too much extra studying, so the amount of work it takes to do well in college has been a massive wake-up call.

It’s putting a strain on your relationship with him. Slowly, at first.

You were too busy with papers and assignments to call during the week, but he was too busy with practices and games and training to call on the weekends. The letters dwindled in frequency and then ceased altogether. Now you’ll go days without hearing from each other at all.

There’s never been a doubt in your mind that long-distance was going to be difficult. But you’re pretty sure it’s not supposed to feel like this.

Your friend drops you off in the driveway and squeezes your tight shoulder. She promises you that it’s going to work out, one way or the other. Then she pulls away to continue to her own city and you climb up the front steps with two garbage bags of laundry in your hands.

You’re attacked by your ecstatic dog at the door, and your mother doesn’t follow far behind. The house is already fragrant with the spiced aroma of baking pumpkin pies, and your mother cries as she hugs you tightly. So do you.

A few minutes later, with your first load of laundry spinning away, you flop onto the couch. To your delight, there’s a text from Mirio. You’re kind of hoping to see him tonight, but you’re not sure what time he was planning on getting into town. Still, a text from him seems promising.

Home yet? It reads.

You’re trying not to let it show that you’re brimming with happiness.

Just got in, you text breezily, curling your knees to your chest with a little smile tugging at your lips. It feels so good to talk to him again here, knowing you’ve got nothing but time to spend with him this weekend.

You text back and forth a little bit, soft little messages about how good it feels to be home and how glad you are that he got home safe. The last message you type out feels indulgent but so good, and you send it with every expectation of an immediate response.

Wanna come over?

Read 7:12 pm

Dull silence persists from your phone. One hour goes by. Two hours. The temptation to send him another message is overwhelming. You’ve been well past the point of avoiding double texts for as long as you can remember.

But this feels… different. Like you shouldn’t bother him. Like, somehow, that’ll only make the silence worse.

So you don’t. Fair enough.

The next day, you’re up to your elbows helping your family get ready for dinner. Your mom has an unfortunate habit of pulling out the stops, but the meal turns out fantastic. Dealing with your extended family is as draining as always, but you’re texting Mirio every so often under the table and he seems happy enough to respond.

You think about bringing up his sudden disappearance last night, but figure he’d been preoccupied with his family. Tonight, his texts are in good spirits.

It’s not until you’re curled up in bed with a belly full of turkey that you try again.

Wanna do something tomorrow? I have brunch in the morning, but I could meet you after.

Read 10:36 pm

Nothing.

Fool me once, you don’t want to let yourself think. But Mirio’s pretty good at putting his phone down when it’s time for bed, so you tell yourself he’s just gone to sleep. He’s gone to sleep and in the morning you’re going to wake up to a sweet little text from him with fresh plans from the afternoon.

Unfortunately, the trend continues. You catch and hold his attention for a few messages a time every day, but every time you mention meeting up in person, you get radio silence. It’s gotten to the point where you know it’s on purpose, and yet every time you fail to confront him, your embarrassment deepens.

Mirio doesn’t play games with you. It feels wrong, to have him jerking your heart around like this. But you give him the benefit of the doubt all weekend.

Finally, it’s Sunday. Your washed, folded laundry is packed neatly in the hallway. You’re finishing up dinner and your family knows, at this point, to keep quiet about Mirio.

You’ve given up on seeing him entirely.

As your family cleans up, you try one more time. You know you shouldn’t. You have every expectation of being treated the same way you have all weekend- why should this time work out any differently?

But you do it anyway.

Hey… I know you might be busy with family stuff, but we’re both going back tomorrow so tonight’s kinda the last chance I can see you…

To your surprise, just a few minutes later, you get a reply,

Want me to pick you up?

Within half an hour, his familiar little Subaru is waiting for you in the dark. Your heart clenches tightly, watching him parked in the driveway. You haven’t seen him in months.

You’d expected a happier reunion.

Still, there’s a sort of lightness that tugs at your heart as you pick your way down the front steps. You tug open the passenger’s side door- the inside of the car is toasty from the rattling little heater that’s always smelled just a little bit burnt.

Mirio has a sad sort of tired smile on his lips, but you can see the relief in his gaze. You’ve almost forgotten what he looks like in real-time like this.

“Hi,” you gasp, almost shyly. You tug the door shut and he shifts the car into gear. You can’t help the little clench of anticipation you get when he puts a hand on the back of your seat to glance over his shoulder.

When he looks back at you, he looks a little brighter.

“Wanna get some coffee?”

He takes you through the Starbucks drive-thru and buys you both iced coffees. The ice rattles cold and sweet inside the cups as he drives you out of town, taking you up the winding road to the point. Neither of you says a thing. You haven’t planned a thing, but you don’t need to.

As you draw closer to the familiar little lookout, your stomach tightens.

Something feels very wrong about the way he’s treating you. By the time he pulls off the road and rolls along the battered gravel path, you’re almost in tears.

You should’ve seen this coming the first time he left you on read. Mirio’s never left you on read before.

“Well,” you mumble, your heart pounding in your throat. You know you’re going to regret this, but it’s killing you to sit in silence. You reach into the centre console and grab your coffee, shaking it weakly in front of him.

“At least you bought me a coffee before breaking up with me.”

Mirio reacts visibly in the dark next to you.

“What?” He looks over, dark eyes shining with betrayal. His blonde brow is firm and set, but there’s genuine surprise in his expression.

“Break up with you?” His voice is trembling. “W-why would I-“

Now you feel even stupider. The tears come, hot and fast and unrelenting. Your next words come in a pinched sob.

“Why wouldn’t you?” You’ve cried like this in front of him before, but this is the first time it’s ever seemed embarrassing.

“I tried to see you all weekend, all I wanted was to see you.” You’re sniffling wildly, and you knee open the glove box because you know he always keeps tissues there. “I missed you so much and-and you wouldn’t even talk to me.”

He whimpers your name, quiet as a prayer. He’s tearing up, too, gripping the steering wheel tightly with his face screwed up in pain.

“I’m sorry,” he croaks. “I was… I thought…”

He’s pausing like you’re going to interrupt him, but you don’t. He bows his head, continuing.

“I was afraid to see you,” he confesses, “because I thought you wanted to break up with me.”

The relief you expect doesn’t come. Instead, a deeper, sicker pain wraps itself around your heart.

“Why would you think that?”

“Because you don’t talk to me anymore,” he ejects. “Not in the same way. I… I know you’re busy, and I know I’m busy, but… things just felt different. Ever since Homecoming, I-I just…”

Homecoming was the one weekend that Mirio had been to visit you since the summer. That was a reunion that felt as good as it was supposed to. You’ll never forget bounding out of your residence hall to find him there, leaning against the edge of his little car like it was a souped-up Harley Davidsen. You’ll never forget the way he laughed when you launched yourself into his arms.

But that was where the bliss had stopped.

Homecoming was a bad weekend for him to visit. You should have seen that coming. You were busy with your brand new friendships, hopping from party to party. And though you were both all smiles when he was climbing into his car again on Sunday night, you’d known he left feeling a little neglected.

“Mirio,” you sob, reaching for him. You pull his eyes to yours with a hand under his jaw- a little unshaven, scratchy- and his cheeks are wet with fresh tears of his own. “I missed you like hell. I love you. I mean that every single time I say it. And I-“

You hate this kind of thing with him. Neither of you takes conflict very well. And though there have always been fights, this is the largest reckoning you’ve ever had.

“I had so many plans for us this weekend,” you admit, and the hurt takes over. Because no matter how you resolve this, that’s time that you can never get back. “And now I have to go back tomorrow and so do you and this is all we’re gonna have.”

“I know,” he sniffles right back. His voice is weak. Trembling. You haven’t seen him like this since his dog died, right after you graduated high school. “God, I-I… I’m so sorry.”

He’s reaching for you now, winding his arms awkwardly over the centre console to pull you close. You have to lean way over but you do, burying your face into the chest of his jacket.

You both sob openly, for nobody but yourselves.

“I don’t want it to be like this,” you plead. “I don’t want to be fighting for things to feel right. I can’t take four more years of this, Mirio, I can’t.”

He’s stroking a palm down the back of your head now, burying his nose into your hair.

“It won’t be,” he promises. “I’m gonna try harder. I’m gonna- I promise.”

“It’s both of us,” you reply. Your voice drops as you start to, slowly, regain control. “It’s me too. I need to try harder, too. I don’t want it to end like this.”

You nose your way to the surface, peering up at him. You both look ridiculous, faces pinched and teary. But none of that matters when you’re leaning up and he’s leaning down and he’s kissing you, all soft and loving in that way that used to make you melt.

It still does.

You let it grow heated, let yourself grab him by the cheeks and pour all of the desperate longing you’ve been doing into this kiss. It becomes very clear to you that you’re not going to be getting out of this car a single woman. And relief spreads warm and gooey through your gut.

“I wanna,” you whisper, pulling back with your eyelashes fluttering. Mirio cups your cheeks and warmly swipes the last of your drying tears away. He leans in and nuzzles the chilled tip of your nose with his.

“You sure?”

You bite your lower lip and shoot him a quiet, sly little nod.

This time, when you climb into the backseat together, no blankets or pillows are waiting for you. But you don’t care. You let him splay you across the narrow back seat, hitching one knee up over the backrest and stretching the other one out alongside him.

It’s a good deal colder this time around. And you can’t wait to get to each other. Your clothes are barely shoved out of the way by the time he’s nudging his stiff tip against your folds. You’re pushing the long hem of his sweatshirt out of the way for him, and he looks down at you with such determined adoration that you wonder why you ever doubted his love in the first place.

He eases into you slow and gentle, just like the first time. Very unlike the second time, harried and rushed under the covers of your rickety dorm bed.

You drag his lips to yours while he bottoms out inside you, wrapping that free leg around his hips and keeping him buried tight.

He fucks you just like that, in deep, tiny little strokes that nudge the tenderest parts of your belly and send pleasure trickling right down your spine each time. He kisses every part of your skin that he can reach, whispering his devotion to you over and over and over again until his voice breaks. Until all he can do is grunt and sigh and shake above you as he pours his climax into you, bringing you to a quiet little peak beneath him.

You stay tangled for a long time, despite the cramps quickly developing in your forcibly angled limbs. He lays between your thighs, listening to your heartbeat as your lazy fingers drift through the sweat-damped strands of his golden hair.

“Hey,” he murmurs warmly, lifting his chin to find your eyes. “I wanna drive you back to school tomorrow, okay?”

“What?” You frown. “Mirio, that’s two hours in the opposite direction for you. Don’t-“

“Please,” he insists, and something in his tone makes you stop. He slides his hands up your sides. “I want to. I didn’t… I should’ve seen you more this weekend. Let me. Please?”

You give a breathy little laugh, laying your head back against the edge of the seat. Your heart throbs with that all-too-familiar warmth.

“My mom’ll be pissed,” you tease, and you feel him grin against your chest.

You’re going to be okay.

[watchmegetobsessed]

“I shouldn’t have let you go.” (Adam Driver)

by now, yall already know about my obsession with adam driver, so i decided to write a fic about him, what a surprise! it’s been a while since i last wrote anything off my drabble list, so i thought i would do this one for that. also thank you @softboyshawn​ for motivating me to write it, you always know when to give me a push!!

word count: 3.2K

drabble list masterlist

Walking into the building Adam pushes his shades up to the top of his head, keeping his hair out of his forehead. He intended to get a haircut weeks ago, but he wasn’t sure what’s gonna be needed for this role, so he decided to keep it long just for a little longer. He is welcomed by a nice receptionist who helps him out with where he has to head for the reading and he takes the elevator with a delightful smile on his lips.

He feels thankful to be back in the drill, working is exactly what he needs right now, something to keep him busy and focused on what’s important. Starting a new movie is always exciting and powering for him, meeting new people, challenging himself with new scenes, this is what he loves the most.

As he steps into the small auditorium that was turned into the location for the reading he looks around, searching for familiar faces around the long table that has a labelled seat for every role in the movie. His eyes meet a well-known face and he can’t help but chuckle as he approaches the director, Shawn Levy holding his arms out for a brotherly hug.

“It’s so nice to see you again!” Shawn pats his back.

“You too, man.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be at your audition, but to be honest, I knew you would be the perfect for the role,” Shawn lets him in on this little secret.

The two of them has worked together in 2014 and Shawn didn’t doubt Adam would be the perfect fit for his new movie’s leading role. He told his assistant to reach out to Adam and ask him to audition. It was kind of an informal meet up with the movie’s producer with a short screen test and they were entirely sure Adam is the one to cast for the role of Derek Lahey, the big city guy moving back to his mother following a split from his long-term girlfriend after he finds out she’s been cheating on him for quite a while.

“It’s alright,” Adam smiles as they let go of each other.

“You got the new script, right?” he asks pointing at the table where Adam sees a rack of scripts in the middle.

“Yeah, got it yesterday, I gave it a few reads last night.”

“Amazing. We had to make a few changes last minute, sorry about it. But we had a change in the cast as well.”

“The cast?” Adam furrows his eyebrows as Shawn looks around and his eyes lighten up when he sees someone he was looking for.

“Yeah, you remember Y/N?”

As Adam turns to the side and his eyes meet hers, he can’t even figure what to do or say. It’s been about four years he last saw Y/N, but time has definitely changed her and it’s kind of taking his breath away. The shy, baby-faced girl has turned into a very mature, eye-catching young woman, but there are some things that stayed the same. Like her freckles all over her nose, her dimples when she smiles and those amazingly dark eyes that just pop out thanks to her reddish-blonde hair she refuses to dye for any role.

“Hi, Adam,” Y/N smiles, feeling just as startled by his presence as he is at hers, but snapping out of his awe he finally goes for a friendly hug.

“Y/N, you’re the change in the cast?”

“The girl we originally casted broke her leg, so we needed to make a quick decision in order to start filming in time. Luckily, Y/N was able to take the job!” Shawn taps her arm smiling at her happily and she tugs her hair behind her ears. Adam finds himself staring at her longer than he should be, so he forces himself to look over at his director friend.

“It’s like a mini reunion,” Adam chuckles. All three of them worked on This Is Where I Leave You in 2014, a time Adam definitely hasn’t forgotten about.

“Take your seats, guys, we’ll start soon,” Shawn says before drifting off to another cast member, welcoming everyone.

“I’m sorry if working with me is uncomfortable for you,” Y/N starts when they are alone. “I thought about saying no, but… this is a great opportunity for me.”

“It’s not uncomfortable! I’m very glad to see you. Honestly.”

Their history is a little longer than the other cast members’. Five years ago, when filming started they hit it off pretty quick on set, even though Y/N was just an extra back then, while Adam was one of the main actors. He was freshly wedded at that time, only one year into his marriage and Y/N was… a realization for him. A realization that hit too late, definitely not at the right time. As a 22 year-old ambitious actress at the start of her career, meeting Adam and somehow forming a bond with him was confusing for the both of them. Adam first questioned his marriage and tried to deal with his confusing feelings for this girl who also seemed just too young for him at the time, while Y/N feared she might ruin an entire marriage and became the blame for the divorce of an up-and-coming, popular actor, which could also ruin her career.

Nothing ever happened between them, they refused to let it go too far. Besides stolen glances and touches, deep conversations and shared secrets, they never crossed the line from where they could have never returned. Once filming and the premier was over, they forced to lose touch thinking this is what’s best for everyone. They went their own ways until their paths crossed again in this room, forcing them to face each other again.

“Well, that’s good to hear, because we’ll spend a lot of time together,” she chuckles nervously.

“Yeah, I guess,” he nods smiling down at him.

All through the reading Adam can’t help but sneak glances at Y/N, sitting right across him, whenever he could, slowly listing everything that changed about her and things that stayed just the same. Their eyes meet a couple of times, Y/N blushes whenever it happens, focusing her gaze down at her script.

“Great job! Thank you for everyone, I can’t wait to see this on the screen!” Shawn cheers once the reading is finished and a round of applause follows his words. “See you on set in three days!”

Everyone starts packing and Adam makes sure he finishes quickly so he can walk over to Y/N.

“Hey, wanna grab lunch with me? We could catch up a little.”

He hopes his offer didn’t come out as anxious as he feels, waiting for her answer. She hesitates for a moment, sliding her script into her bag before nodding her head.

“Okay. Why not?”

They are perfectly hidden in their booth in the nearby diner they chose to eat in. Adam is anxiously scanning through the menu even though he knows what he wants, but is just too afraid to look into her eyes.

“So, how have you been?” she breaks the silence putting her menu down and their eyes finally meet again.

“Um… busy, mostly.”

“Congrats on the Star Wars movies. You were great in all of them.”

“You saw them?” He is genuinely surprised, he never thought she would be the kind of girl to watch them.

“Yeah. Wanted to see what the hype is about,” she smirks leaning back in her seat. “Turned out I like watching dudes in uniform, fighting with some more dudes, without uniform.”

Adam laughs shaking his head, happy that her humor hasn’t changed.

“That’s exactly what Star Wars is about.”

“Alright, so what’s up with you outside work?”

Before he could answer their waitress arrives. She takes their order and collecting the menus she disappears leaving them alone again.

“Outside work?” Adam inhales rubbing his hands to his thighs. “Um, not much. I’ve been hitting up the gym daily, I’m learning to cook and…” He pauses for a moment, debating whether if it’s the best time to admit it or not, but he decides it’s something that should be cleared. “You know, I have a lot of time since I got divorced last year.”

Y/N’s eyes go wide as this wasn’t something she expected to hear.

“What? Oh God, I didn’t know… I’m so sorry, Adam.”

“Don’t be, it was for the best,” he sighs with a sad smile. Even though it really was the best choice, it took a toll on both of them, letting go of something that was supposed to last forever.

“How are you holding up?”

“Fine, I’m trying to focus on work, most of the time.”

Y/N nods in agreement.

“Yeah, that’s a great technique. I… I did the same when my boyfriend broke up with me after two years.”

“Oh. I didn’t… I didn’t know you had a boyfriend.”

“Have you been keeping an eye on me?” she smirks, making him realize it sounded like he has been following her ever since they stopped talking.

“I wasn’t—That’s not how I meant it…”

“I know, relax,” she chuckles. “I kept it as low-key as possible. Turns out it was the best choice since the asshole left me for some high school senior,” she grimaces.

“Ouch, that sounds… illegal?”

“Kind of, but that’s not my problem anymore,” she shrugs. “So, I guess we both had our ups and downs lately.”

“Seems like.”

Adam feels like this is the moment when he is supposed to say that he is sorry for the way they parted. Things were getting out of hands and he knew it was time to make a decision. Work on things with his wife or end it and give it a try with Y/N. He made the wrong choice, but regardless of this, he also chose the wrong way to let her know they can’t do it any longer.

“Y/N, listen. I—“

“Don’t,” she shakes her head. “I totally get it. Let’s just… move on. Okay?”

Looking into her eyes he sees how much she doesn’t want to talk about it and forgetting about the past is exactly what he wants to do. So nodding they come to a silent agreement. The past is left behind, they have started a new, empty page.

 ***

 Heading to her trailer Adam runs his fingers through his hair and fixes the shirt that’s already his outfit for the filming. Knocking on the door he waits for her to call out, but instead she opens it for him.

“Hey! Got your text, everything alright?” Standing at the bottom of the stairs he is finally shorter than her so he has to look up at her.

“Come in,” she nods and he follows her inside.

She is still in her robe, but her makeup and hair is done, ready to take up on the role of Leah, the next door girl Derek falls for upon coming home.

“I’m a little freaked out,” she admits, fear filling her dark irises as she stares at him, arms hugging herself.

“Hey, relax, it’s fine.” He immediately figures what the problem is, the first day of filming coming at her a little more intense than she thought.

Taking her hands he pulls her to the small couch at the back of the trailer and they sit down next to each other.

“Talk to me, okay? Tell me how you feel.”

“I-I’m… I’m just afraid I will blow this. This is my first big role, like a main role and I’m so afraid I’ll disappoint Shawn,” she sighs in despair.

“You can’t disappoint him, he wouldn’t have casted you if you weren’t good. Believe me.”

“I just don’t want to embarrass myself, forgetting my line or something.” “I’ll do that all the time, don’t worry.”

“Oh please, I bet you already know even my lines!” she rolls her eyes chuckling.

“I definitely don’t. Don’t you remember how much I messed up back then? I think half the gag roll is about me.”

“I loved it when you started laughing at your own line,” she chuckles recalling the memory.

“See? Don’t worry about messing up, I’ll do the same, though I’m sure you’ll be great. Just don’t stress okay?”

She nods taking a few deep breaths. Adam feels a sense of intimacy in how they shared this moment, something he missed so much ever since they stopped talking. They had so many moments before, in between takes, after filming, early before filming, they were seeking all these little sparks since they didn’t have more. They couldn’t have more.

“You’ll be fine?” Adam asks squeezing her hand.

“Yes. Thank you for coming by,” she nods smiling as they stand up and head to the door. “See you in a bit.”

He just nods smiling and leaves so she can get dressed and ready for the start.

Filming together is now a different experience for the both of us. While they had no interaction on the screen before, now they had to bring a whole romance alive and though Y/N has seen Adam work his magic, it’s the first time he see her in real action. And his mind is blown away. Seeing her change into a whole different character amazes him on a different level and in between takes he thinks about how he has never felt like this with another cast member he worked with on a movie. She is just… different.

Once filming is over Adam is in his trailer, taking his time to get ready to leave when there’s a knock on the door.

“Come in!”

Glancing up from his phone he turns to the door and see Y/N sticking her head inside with a warm smile on her lips.

“Hey.”

“Hi, come on in!” he invites her inside and she walks in closing the door behind her. “So, how did you feel on your first day?”

Without even answering the question Y/N strides over to him and hugs him. It takes him by surprise but after a second of hesitation he wraps his arms around her.

“Thanks for being so patient and nice with me all day. And messing your lines up on purpose.”

A deep chuckle shakes his chest as he holds her close.

“It wasn’t on purpose,” he lies, but she just smiles to herself before letting him go.

“Do you have somewhere to be?”

“Not really.”

“Then what do you say, staying a little, celebrating the first day? I have some wine in my trailer.”

“Sounds great,” he smiles.

Twenty minutes later they are sitting on the floor in her trailer, drinking white wine out of plastic cups and laughing about anything and everything.

“I remember that day!” he chuckles holding his cup up.

“Yeah, it’s not hard remembering me spilling three cups of coffees on myself,” she snorts taking a sup from her drink.

“Fuck, I missed having you around,” Adam sighs closing his eyes. If he weren’t four drinks into the evening, he probably wouldn’t have said that, but now it’s already out there.

“You did?” Y/N tilts her head smiling at him, watching him lean his head against the wall behind him.

“I did,” he nods, eyes still closed.

“I missed having you around too. I missed our talks.”

“I’m sorry for the way it ended.”

“Hey, we agreed on not talking about that!”

“I know, but… I really wanted to tell you that,” he sighs looking down at his cup, stirring the wine around before chugging it down and pouring some more from the bottle.

“I don’t blame you. You were married and we were… dancing on a dangerous line.”

Glancing up at her he watches her just sit there, busy with her own drink and he admires this moment, something he has been waiting for years to have again. He regrets making the wrong choice back then, thought he understands his own reasoning behind it. People don’t just give up on a marriage, he couldn’t have known it wasn’t gonna work out. But he also lost so much time with her and that’s his biggest regret.

“I shouldn’t have let you go,” he breathes out.

Lifting her gaze up her eyes meet his as they stare at each other, feeling the change in the conversation, obviously. An absent-minded smile appears on her light pink lips as she tugs her hair behind her ear.

“I always thought that you found me too young, outside all the other circumstances we had.”

“I did think about being an old man compared to you,” he chuckles. “But I feel like it was bridged pretty fast.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes! I mean, it’s not even ten years, the world has seen way worse,” he chuckles making her laugh as well.

“You’re right.”

Putting his drink down to the floor he climbs over to her and sits next to her, resting his back against the couch just like she is doing and they sit there in silence for a couple of moments before Y/N rests her head on his shoulder.

“Adam?” she breaks the silence.

“Yes?”

“I think we are at the line again.”

“Yeah. We are.”

Another short silence while Adam turns to the side a bit, just enough to brush his lips against the crown of her head.

“Are we gonna cross it this time?” Lifting her head she looks at him with doubtful eyes as she puts her drink aside too.

Instead of answering his hands find their way to her waist and somehow he pulls her to his lap, her knees on each of his sides, hands resting on his broad shoulders.

“I don’t know what we are going to do, but I’m gonna cross the line.”

And without hesitation he presses his lips to hers. She doesn’t think twice before returning the kiss since she’s been waiting for this moment from the day she met him. He digs his fingers into her hair at the back of her head while she combs through his messy strands too, kissing like it’s their last moment on Earth. His hands slide under her shirt and soon it lands on the floor somewhere next to them.

As much as she wants to continue this, she still doesn’t want to do it lying on the floor of her trailer, that’s not what they deserve. So pushing away she tries to catch her breath while she admires his swollen lips and messy hair, running her fingers along his cheeks.

“We shouldn’t be doing this here. Not like this.”

“You’re right,” he nods realizing he got a little carried away.

Leaning down she softly kisses him again before sliding off his lap, landing on the floor again.

“We should head home, we have work tomorrow,” she advises as they slowly get up from the floor and gather their stuff, getting ready to leave.

Walking out to the parking lot they stand midway between their cars, staring up at each other, neither of them wanting to leave.

“See you tomorrow?” She bites into her bottom lip and it’s enough to drive him crazy. Pulling her closer he kisses her again.

“Yeah. How about dinner after filming?”

“Sure,” she smiles.

“It’s a date,” he raises his eyebrows as they start backing towards their cars.

“Surely is,” she chuckles. Right as she is about to turn around Adam leaps in her direction and running back to her he kisses her once more before sprinting back to his car.

Giggling to herself she gets into the car and heads home, knowing he would be here in the morning, ready to continue everything from where they left it off.

[hallie-fics]

author spotlight - still_i_fall

He wants to forget how it felt to be hers for just one second.

- remember it’s all pretend @in-my-head-i-do-everything-right

one of the most prolific writers in the hallie fandom, @in-my-head-i-do-everything-right (still_i_fall) has graced us with classic after classic. i had an absolute blast talking with her, and hope you all enjoy the interview!

q&a

Hey! Thanks again for including me in this! Very excited to answer the questions. I love talking about myself. 

Favorite of your stories (and why)

I almost got stuck on this question. I really want to say remember it’s all pretend because I am so incredibly proud of that one. It was the first multi chapter fic that I ever properly finished and I feel like that really means something to me. I also really love that concept, and how it was able to fit in slowburn and enemies to friends to lovers and mutual pining plus a million other little tropes. And, most of all, it was really fun to write. It happened really easily. It’s something I’ll go back to sometimes if I’m ever in the mood to reread my own work. 

But I also love this new thing that I just wrote called i just wanna dance with you. I think if I can pull it off, it could be something really amazing. I was able to write the first chapter in about a week and had a ton of fun doing it. And I really love writing Harry’s pov and just switching things up a little. Ugh, I really love the idea of hallie meeting/knowing each other as little kids and I think that’s pretty apparent in these two fics. 

Easiest story to write

I’ll stop the world (and melt with you) happened really quickly which I guess qualifies it as easy to write. I thought it’d be more difficult just because so much of it is dependent on canon which is something I’m not entirely used to, but it ended up going to fast. I think somewhere I still have a page of notes on that Prom episode and everything that happens to Allie and Harry. I really wanted to include pieces of dialogue from the show. 

I also think it was because I used to do this thing when I was bored where I’d think about who I’d want to be trapped in a Groundhog day like loop with and what’d I’d do. It was just this recurring thought/ daydream I had when I was younger so it’s definitely a situation that I’ve thought through a little. 

Hardest story to write

The taste, the touch, the way we love has been a pain in the ass to write right from the start. Sometimes it’s really fun, but I think I’ve been sticking way too close to the outline I drew at the very start and have been avoiding writing it for too long. Sometimes I absolutely love to write it and have the time of my life, and other times I hate it. There’s not much of an in between. Still definitely want to finish it. Just waiting on that final bit of inspiration. 

Pre-writing process

I’m all about doing a full outline. Usually. With most longer fics (anything I think will be over 6,000 words), I do a full outline where I plan out the progression of the fic and specific scenes and pieces of dialogue. Usually, the plot hits me all at once and is usually the easiest part of the writing process for me. From that original outline, I usually have at least a few specific scenes fully planned out with pieces of dialogue and/or exposition. For example, for i’ll stop the world I started out the planning process with the introduction piece of the fic. That first paragraph is straight out of the note apps on my phone. A lot of the time it’ll end up being a bullet point list of main bits. I’ll use parentheses to specify the tone of a scene or little details and then use brackets for things that I want verbatim in the fic. 

But sometimes I end up with very little pre-planning. The skating au is kinda the only good example of this. I only had the roughest of outlines for that one (how i wanted the first chapter to start and end) and everything else just came together as I tried to get from point A to point B. 

What drew you to Hallie

The potential. They could have a really great story and I think that’s fun. There’s a lot of chemistry there and their dynamic is fun and, yeah, I think I’m a little too far in to get out now.

Favorite line (or lines)/ section you’re proud of

God, I have so many. Hope you don’t mind me going through them. It’s incredibly self indulgent but also gives me an excuse to go through my old works.

From the very first hallie fic I ever wrote, how you wish it would be all the time:

“And Harry's not perfect. He's not what she wanted before this all started or even really after, but everything's different now.”

Sometimes I forget about this fic, but I really shouldn’t cause there is a solid chance that this was my peak. And this line is really fun. 

From we kiss and we keep busy:

“The stars may have moved a little bit, but they’re still there, and they still look the same, and that’s good enough for her.”

I promise I’m not going through every hallie fic I’ve ever written but god I love this line. 

From i saved a picture where your hair was braided:

“It’s late nights and long talks and video games and cookie dough. It’s almost kisses, then definite kisses, and then not wanting to wake up anywhere but his bed. That’s how she starts to fall in love with Harry Bingham.”

Just that last part. That last line. The rest is just there for some fun context. Fun fact: this entire little mini fic was a desperate attempt to stave off writer's block and is based entirely around that single line in the song Donna by the lumineers. Still had a lot of fun with it, though.

From remember it’s all pretend:

“He wonders when she’ll realise that this hasn’t been pretend for him in years.    Probably never.    (He’d still run away with her.)”

“In the back of her mind, Allie wonders why she didn’t try harder to stay with Harry, why now she can only seem to fall in love in front of a camera where there’s the promise of pretend.”

“She likes to think that they’re still friends, that they’re just friends who don’t talk anymore, two people who drifted because one couldn’t handle the idea of change.”

This fic has a million little bits that I love. I could literally go on forever. It’s just full of that mutual pining angst that I live for. 

From but i close my eyes and i’m somewhere else:

“She did not mention this earlier because she was trying desperately hard to ignore it, but fuck, she’s really missed him calling her Pressman.”

“She wonders if Cassandra has any travel sized neck pillows.”

This fic is surprisingly good seeing as I don’t remember writing it at all. I was very much high on some sort of flu medication while writing this and I think that explains a lot about this fic. It’s fun, though. I really love the tone.

From the taste, the touch, the way we love:

“She starts to feel like she couldn’t avoid Harry if she wanted to (and somehow, as the days turn into weeks, she finds herself not wanting to more and more).”

“There’s saltwater in her eyes, hair, and mouth. Harry’s leaning back in it, floating. She is too. The water is blue, and warm, and the sky is clear. Sometimes his hand will grab hers just to pull her closer. When she thinks of calm, of happiness, and vacation, she’ll think of this moment.”

“They’re quiet for a moment. Maggie Rogers can be heard in the background, faded and slow. Harry’s tapping his fingers along to it on the wheel, eyes staring straight ahead. The road is lined with trees, and it all feels like home.”

“For a half a second, she thinks she loves him. She pushes that away and watches him throw wrapping paper behind him dramatically. She pushes it away and she smiles and she laughs and she tries not to think too hard about what all of this means.”

This fic definitely has its moments. I’m really excited to get the last part done and out, though. I just feel like I’ve spent too long on this fic. I want it done.

From i just wanna dance with you:

“Allie met Harry the same day Cassandra did. It was early in the morning and she was four and now, when she looks back, all she can remember from the moment is the vague outline of wild hair and a smile so bright and wide and carefree that it really can’t be anyone else’s.”

“She tries to remember that she likes skating with Will, that there’s no point in wondering what it’d be like if things were just a little bit different.”

“She lied earlier; gold, silver, bronze, doesn’t matter. Harry always looks good.”

“The first time he ever placed first in a competition, she was skating with him. He wonders how long he’ll associate the feeling of a gold medal around his neck with her hand in his. He hopes it’s not long. “

I’m so excited to finish this fic like you guys don’t even understand. It’s really fun and it feels easy to write (so far; knock on wood) and I love the concept. 

What type of Hallie stories do you like to write/read?

I only write au’s just because I think the rules are little different, everything’s just a little bit more relaxed. You’re allowed so much freedom when it’s a completely different universe and I really love that. I went through a phase recently where I was obsessed with canon divergence and this whole idea of a history of contingency. Just there being these points or moments where if one thing was just a little different, everything would’ve changed. I love that and I think that’s really apparent in my drafts/ unreleased wips. 

I’ll read anything, though. Especially with the Hallie ao3 page being so small. I do definitely have a preference still towards au’s, though.

How long have you been writing

For forever. As a kid, I’d fill up entire notebooks with story ideas. It was my favorite thing to do. When I was twelve, a teacher complimented my writing, and I think that really stuck with me. It’s just something I’ve always enjoyed doing. 

Do you ever worry about how your stories are received

Not really. A little bit with multi chapter stories just because I really want every chapter to be better than the last. I just really don’t want to disappoint anyone. 

What’s the hardest part of writing for you

The middle bits. I usually have a very clear idea of the beginning and end so it’s everything in between that I have trouble with. I think that’s why I’m so big on outlining.

Do you ever get writer's block and how do you deal with it

Oh my god all the fucking time! Right now, for example. Usually, I just try to work through it, especially if I have a project in progress. I also do a lot of reading to try to force some sort of inspiration. A lot of what I write is based on what I’m reading. I’ll also listen to music. And, recently, I’ve been making mood boards for my fics which has been so much fun. I really like looking at pretty pictures.

Biggest risk you’ve taken as a writer

Lol I don’t really take risks. I think the riskiest thing I do is post the first chapter of a story with none of the second chapter started. I do that a lot. 

Favorite Hallie trope

Reluctant friends to very good friends to lovers. Also, living together without establishing a clear relationship. I write that a lot. Mutual pining is always fun too. 

Favorite Hallie headcanon

That Harry calls Allie ‘Pressman’ which forces Allie to call him ‘Bingham’. I just think there’s something so fun about calling someone by their last name. Plus, then you get that moment when the first name is used and that gets to be significant. Oh, also that they both swear like sailors, but that’s mostly self-insert on my part.

This felt very self indulgent, but I hope it was at least somewhat enjoyable for someone. 

I am forever waiting to read whatever @in-my-head-i-do-everything-right writes next. It was great to see some of the behind the scenes and I would definitely recommend her latest release cities you’ll never see on screen.

[this-is-freeridge]

The Air Between Us

Chapter Seven: Mari turns eighteen and Oscar finally lets her in.

Warning: this fic deals with dark themes, including but not limited to teen pregnancy, rape, drug abuse, murder, abortion, underage drinking and underage sex.

Read the other chapters here

I wrote 90% of this when I was sick and by the time I finished I couldn’t be bothered going back to proofread so I apologise if parts of it don’t make sense.

The Martinez house was full - Mari didn’t know this many people could fit in this tiny four-bedroom. That was part of the problem though. It was Saturday night, Mari’s birthday. Abuelita had made her a gorgeous dress - deep red, crushed velour with spaghetti straps and a hem that fell just above the floor - though Ruby took part of the credit as he bragged about how he snaked Mari’s phone and scrolled her Pinterest boards for inspiration. She felt beautiful, like a star, she was far from the centre of attention.

Most everyone here was extended Martinez family and Ruby’s friends and while she appreciated the effort Ruby had made, she really didn’t know what to do with herself. When people would come to speak to her, it was usually a friend or family member of Geny’s who only wanted to get the scoop on Ruben’s long lost daughter.

She felt suffocated and overwhelmed, but at the same time she felt alone. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she had eyes on her everywhere she went, yet no one seemed to be taking the time to get to know her. She never thought she’d miss the birthdays she spent alone at her mother’s house, but at least there, she didn’t feel like a sideshow act.

She hadn’t heard from her mother since the other day, though she also had made a point of not answering private numbers. She blocked her mother’s number and she didn’t mention to anyone because she didn’t want to make a big deal of it. She was fine here, at least that’s what she kept telling herself.

“Fuck,” she muttered to herself as she glanced around the room, desperate for a distraction, something to keep her mind occupied, her hands busy and her nerves down.

Just as the thought crossed her mind, Jasmine - one of Ruby’s classmates that she had met earlier tonight - walked past with a plate of what looked like mini fajitas.

‘Food, perfect!’ She thought, reaching out an arm to stop Jasmine.

“Girl,” she said, taking the plate from Jasmine’s hands, “gimme that food,”

Without hesitation, Mari bit the fajita off the toothpick in one clean bite. And then the second, and the third. And the fourth. And the-

“Damn, girl!” Jasmin said with a smile. “I gotta admit, you looked like another one of them skinny bitches but shit, you can eat! Oh, but girl, don’t worry; I’m into it, I’m into it,”

“Jasmine, these are so good!” Mari said, eating a few more. She liked Jasmine, the girl seemed genuinely interested in knowing Mari - when she wasn’t trying to get the goss, anyway.

“I know right!” Jasmine replied, popping one in her mouth, “my mom made them a couple weeks ago and she was just going to throw them out but I was like damn, what a waste! So I just reheated ‘em girl, no big deal,”

Mari stopped eating immediately. “Wait, weeks? Jasmine, this is chicken - how old are these?”

Jasmine shrugged, “like two, three weeks? Don’t worry though, I heated them up for lunch yesterday, they’re fine!”

“Yesterday? How many times have they been reheated?” Mari shook her head, “actually, no. I don’t wanna know,”

Resigning herself to the fact that she probably just contracted salmonella or something,  Mari headed for the bathroom.

“Mari!”

Ruby. She really didn’t know if she could deal with his right now - there were too many people she didn’t know staring and whispering about her and she just ate three-week-old chicken.

“Ruby, I’m pretty sure I just got food poisoning from Jasmine’s chicken fajitas so I really need to go and vomit now,” she said, exasperated. She didn’t mean to be rude, but she was over it. “Is this important?”

“No, that’s perfect!” Ruby said, eyes lighting up. He grabbed a nearby chair and climbed onto it, standing so that he could yell above the crowd, “Yo, everyone! Mari ain’t feeling well so she’s gonna go throw up! I’d avoid the bathroom until she comes out!”

Mari gaped at him until he clambered back down.

“Ruby, what the hell?”

“It’s fine,” he said as he opened the bathroom door and shoved her inside, “have fun!”

The door closed behind her and she stood for a moment, unsure what the hell just happened, and then she noticed something.

To the side of the window that was opposite the door, there was a piece of lined notebook paper stuck to the wall. Written in colourful markers, that paper read “EXIT THIS WAY”, complete with hand-drawn arrows pointing to the window. Beneath that was a chair with another note atop it. She made her way over to the chair and picked up the sticky note.

The note read: I know it’s small, but it’s the only window without bars on it. Sorry! :(

Mari giggled and curiosity got the best of her. She dragged the chair to the window and, though it took a bit of contortion, she shimmied her way out. When she was finally outside (and breathing fresh air for what felt like the first time in years) she looked around and couldn’t help the laugh that escaped when she saw what was waiting for her.

Standing near the gate was Oscar, clad in his usual shorts and white socks, complete with a black wife-beater, but in his hands was a small cake with a handful of candles on top.

“Ruby thought you would be feeling a bit out of place,” Spooky said plainly, as though just the sight of him wasn’t making her heart beat so hard it could break her ribcage.

What was he doing here? After everything that had happened between them that week, the last thing she was expecting was Spooky to turn up.

“So he arranged me a...you? With a cake?” She asked with a laugh as she walked over to him.

“The cake was my idea,” he said and handed it to her, “it’s red velvet; the red colour comes from beetroot, sounds weird but it tastes good,”

She smiled down at the cake, too embarrassed to face him with her bright red face. He made her a cake? What was he doing to her?

“Well, Ruby knows me well,” Mari said, “I couldn’t wait to get out of there,”

Spooky gave a half shrug and offered a simple solution. “So, lets get out of here,”

From the moment he said it, Mari knew she shouldn’t leave with him. It would be rude - to Ruby, who planned this, and Geny, who was letting all these people trash her house, and Ruben who would be so worried - but the idea of going back in there made her throat close up. 

The answer was simple; she wasn’t about to pass up some time with Oscar.

“Let’s go,” she said with a nod and a smile. It was a bad idea, she was only going to cause herself more embarrassment and heartache, but he had this power over her and she couldn’t stay away.

“You look good in that dress, mami,” he said. He was taking care to stay about a foot away from her, but she didn’t miss the way he eyed her up and down, “real good,”

“Thanks, Abuelita made it for me,”

He cleared his throat and said, “it, uh, fits real well,”

“You didn’t have to do this,” she said.

“I wanted to,”

The line gave her all kinds of contradicting feelings; a deep heat in her stomach and a cold, icy hand that wrapped around her heart and squeezed.

She couldn’t keep this up, she needed to get over him and he wasn’t helping.

Mari stopped walking and turned to him. “Then what I mean is you can’t keep doing this,”

He paused and asked: “and why is that?”

And then he continued walking. With a sigh, Mari walked with him. Maybe this conversation would be easier if they weren’t facing each other.

“Surprising me,” she said, “the cake, telling me you aren’t involved, letting me know I look good. You know I’m into you and you’ve made it clear you aren’t into me. Doing all of this shit isn’t helping me get over you,”

At some point as she spoke they had reached Oscar’s house. The lights were on but the place was quiet; Mari suspected that this was a rare occasion no one was home. Spooky didn’t say anything as he unlocked the door. Neither did Mari.

Did she want to know what he was thinking? Yes. He looked so deep in thought though, cute frown on his face and a small pout, and Mari didn’t want to push him in case she pushed too hard and he put those walls up.

He led her inside and locked the door behind him. Oscar took the cake from Mari’s hands and set it on the kitchen bench on their way through. His hand was pressed against her lower back as they walked through the vaguely familiar hall to his room. His hand was warm and Mari was loving the feeling of his hands on her. The tingles were back.

“When did I say I wasn’t into you?” He asked as Mari sat on the edge of his bed, making herself comfortable.

“At the party, when I kissed you,” she answered.

He made his way over to her and sat beside her. This situation was all too familiar and she was starting to get antsy. Why did this feel so intimate?

Spooky looked at her, he was so close she could feel his warm breath on her face as he spoke. “I said it wasn’t a good idea; I never said I didn’t want it,”

“So...what are you saying now?”

“That,” Spooky shrugged and looked away, “maybe you triggered my chemical reaction too,”

It suddenly became too hot and Mari’s hands were getting clammy, her heart racing. What is he saying? She shut up as he continued.

“I didn’t know for sure at first, that I was into you. I knew you were fine,” he raked his eyes down her body, “and I knew I wanted a piece, but it wasn’t until I saw you at the store the other day. I was with you, and then she walked in and it just sorta clicked in my brain. I wasn’t interested in her. Not when you were around,”

Mari’s world was spinning. Her feelings were returned - she wasn’t crazy! She wanted to kiss him again, but she wouldn’t risk it yet. He had to make the first move this time.

Instead, she asked: “and what does that mean for us now?”

His answer broke her heart all over again.

“It means I still don’t think it’s a good idea,”

“Why?” She snapped. She couldn’t keep doing this. She wanted to leave, and she was definitely going to, but she needed answers to get closure, “Is it my age? My family? What is it?”

“It’s my life!” He yelled back, “You can’t be safe with me, Mari. The Prophet$...they’re unpredictable. Yeah, most of the time they won’t shoot when your woman is around, but that don’t mean they won’t use you to get to me. I won’t risk you,”

Mari wanted to argue, but she couldn’t. He had good reasons and she had to respect his decision.

But she couldn’t deny she still wanted him.

Maybe they couldn’t be together long-term, or in any sort of serious capacity, but did that mean they couldn’t be together at all? She wanted him, that much was simple, and he wanted her back.

“One night,” she said, turning to him and letting her hands rest on his knees, “just give me one night. I like you, you like me. Sex has never been presented to me as a positive thing and I want to change that. I want my first time to be with someone I trust. It doesn’t have to be a thing, no strings and...no feelings. Tomorrow we can act like nothing happened and go back to being just friends,”

“I don’t know, Mari,” he said, “Aren’t there already feelings,”

“So,” she said as she scooted closer, “call it closure,”

Oscar paused and glanced at her lips, covered in a thin layer of gloss all plump and shimmering. He knew it was a bad idea, but he wanted her. One night wouldn’t hurt, right? Closure. Right. One night with her and then he would know what it was like to be with her and he could finally get it out of his head.

Right?

The devil on his shoulder won out once again as he cupped her cheek and captured her lips with his. The gloss tasted like strawberry and her lips were softer than he had imagined. She let out a small whimper as she melted into the kiss. The sound urged Spooky on and he took it as an invitation to swipe his tongue across her lower lip and slide it into her mouth.

She fumbled a little but picked it up quickly as she returned the kiss with fervour. She pressed her body closer to his and he let his hand fall to her hips. He grabbed her tight and pulled her onto his lap as they kissed. She knelt across him, knees on either side of his legs and dress pushed up to her thighs.

Spooky’s hands found their way to her ass and slid under her dress, pushing the dress up further and grabbing handfuls of her thick backside as she started to slowly grind against him. Oscar’s hands fumbled with the zipper on her dress as he relished in the friction she was creating.

“Look at me, mami,” Oscar’s gravelly voice ordered, sending shivers down her spine. She obeyed, meeting his hooded eyes with her own.

He stood from the bed with her in his arms and kissed her once more before he set her down gently. The spaghetti straps slid over her shoulders and the dress fell to the floor in a cascade of crushed velour. In only a pair of peach, nylon-seamfree panties, she would’ve felt embarrassed were it not for the way Spooky’s eyes darkened with lust at the sight of her. Instinctually, she brought her arm up to cover her chest.

“Your turn,” she ordered, feeling brave despite her pounding heart.

Mari enjoyed the show as Oscar removed his own clothing. She noticed the way each of his muscles moved as he pulled the wife-beater over his head, revealing his tan skin. The sight sent heat pooling to her core, she could already feel the wetness between her legs. Once he was clad in only his briefs, he bridged the distance between them. His arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her body into his. Mari felt his erection press against her and she wondered briefly if he is going to be gentle with her. He took her face in his hands and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, that alone was enough to dispel any doubt.

Oscar’s blood boiled as he felt her breasts press against his chest. Her black hair was still perfectly curled, but her cheeks were rosy, her lipgloss was smeared and her lips were kiss-swollen. She was truly beautiful and for just a moment, he wondered what the hell she was doing here with him. He brushed the thought aside quickly. He couldn’t think of a time he had wanted anyone else this badly. He wanted to rip off that dress, turn her around and take her. If it were up to him he would have, but this wasn’t up to him. This was Mari’s night and he wanted to make sure he took his time worshipping her.

Feeling bold, she slid her hand down his chest, past his stomach to his growing bulge. She touched him gently at first, but the way he began to press into her hand urged her on. Mari closed her eyes and let her head drop to his shoulder so he couldn’t see her blush as her instincts took over and she moved her hand up and down. He moaned softly into her ear and she could feel his thick length pulse.

With a growl, he threw her back onto the bed, as she landed she let out a small giggle. The sound was music to his ears and he smiled as he climbed over her, propping himself up on his elbow. His free hand tangled in her hair and he pulled her back for another kiss. She tasted like cheap champagne and cherry lip gloss and it was addictive. He kissed her hard, with confidence, but she could feel the hesitation on his tongue as it glided over her own.

“Don’t do that,” she whispered against his lips. “Don’t hold back. Kiss me like you mean it,”

He didn’t need to be told twice. All hesitation gone, he kissed her like it might be the last chance he got. His hand left her hair and found its way to her knee. His fingertips tickled the skin of her inner thigh as it trailed higher, higher, until he found the elastic of her panties. Pushing them aside, he let his fingers slide over her wet heat.

Mari’s hips bucked into his hand, begging for more friction. She had never felt anything like this, her body was on fire in the best way. Oscar sucked and nipped at the skin of Mari’s neck, then slid his tongue over her skin to soothe it. He repeated this as his fingers entered her, doing his best to distract her from the unfamiliar sensation. She cried out, a little in pain but mostly in pleasure.

“Want me to stop?” Oscar mumbled against her ear.

Mari shook her head.

“No, I want it,” she said. He continued pumping in and out of her, slowly at first but picking up speed as her hesitant whines turned to needy cries. Her back arched off the bed, her eyes closed and her mouth slightly open. He couldn’t help but think about what it would be like to hear dirty words coming from that pretty mouth of hers. As much as he’d love it, he didn’t dwell on it. He wanted her to be comfortable, not pressured or pushed outside of her comfort zone.

A needy whimper escaped her lips when his fingers left her. She had never felt anything like that in her life, so euphoric and intimate and she never wanted it to end. Still, she couldn’t wait for what was still to come. When she glanced down, between her knees she could see the outline of his length straining against his briefs. From what she could make out it wasn’t too long, not that she had much to compare to, but he was thick and she wanted to feel him.

Oscar started to move off the bed and within a second Mari had grabbed his arm to stop him.

Where was he going? Was he having regrets? Did he not like it?

Mari’s mind, the part that is so afraid of rejection and being alone that she usually hides so well, was on overdrive.

“Where are you going?”

She hated the way her voice shook as she asked but then he looked at her with a soft smile, as though he was reading her mind. Warm, chapped lips met her forehead with a small kiss, something that felt both too innocent and too intimate in the moment.

“I’m getting a condom, baby,”

Mari tried to ignore the butterflies she got when he called her baby as she replied. “I’m on the pill, it’s okay,”

She wasn’t sure where the courage to say that came from, but she didn’t care when a cheeky smile spread across his face.

“You sure?” He asked, cocking an eyebrow in that way that makes Mari melt because she doesn’t understand how a single person can be that attractive. She could only nod, pulling him back to his position between her thighs.

She hooked her fingers around the band of his underwear, tugging them down as far as she could in his kneeled position. His cock sprang out of the cotton confines; he was bigger than she had thought and it excited her, but it also scared her. She bit her lip a little too hard to get rid of any hesitation and grabbed the base of his length, stroking him with a steady confidence, reminding herself it’s okay she has no skills because he already wants her.

Oscar hissed a “fuck” under his breath and, curious, Mari looked up at him to gauge his reaction. His brow was furrowed, but his mouth was slightly open and his deep brown eyes were staring at her with an intense hunger. Oscar made a low, guttural sound and grabbed Mari’s thighs hard. She almost hoped he’d leave bruises in the shape of his fingerprints so that when she wakes up tomorrow she has some tangible proof that this actually happened, for just one night she had him.

“Take off your panties,” he ordered and she was quick to obey, watching with a wanting gaze as he removed his own briefs. “Lie down,”

He hovered over her, forearm by her head to hold himself up.

“Is this okay?” He asked.

“Yeah,” she said, “this is good. I-Is this good for you? Don’t guys like-”

He cut her off with a kiss and she could feel him aligning himself with her entrance.

“I like this,” he said, “I want you to be comfortable,”

“Oh, okay,” she exhaled into a smile and wrapped her legs around Spooky, locking her ankles behind his back and pressing him into her. “I’d like you to fuck me now, Oscar,”

And then he kissed her again, though it wasn’t enough to completely distract from the sting of pain she felt as he presses into her. He filled her up completely and though it was a foreign feeling, she loved it.

“You good, mami?” He asked.

“Yeah, I- Oscar, I need more,” she whined, using her legs to pull him closer to her.

The pain persisted but Mari focused her attention on the feeling of Oscar’s tongue on her neck and the smell of cigars and Corona on his breath until she barely noticed the sting. She pressed a kiss to the Santos cross on his neck, tasting the sweat on his skin as she traced the ink with her tongue.

Oscar touched every inch of skin he could reach until he settled between her legs once more. He rubbed her with practiced movements while he thrusted into her, steadily losing the pace he had built up.

Mari’s orgasm crashed over her like a wave. She cried out, almost worried that the neighbours would hear but not caring enough to do anything about it. Her legs shook and her back arched off the bed as her nails raked down Oscar’s arms.

“Shit, Mari, I’m gonna fucking come,” he warned, and the sound that Mari made in response tipped him over the edge as he reached his climax, spilling into her.

Once he’d come down, he looked at her and brushed a stray curl from her face.

“How do you feel?” He asked, his eyes searching her face for an answer before she spoke.

Mari met his gaze and felt her face burn. “I feel good. I feel really good,”

He smiled and kissed her gently. She could still feel him inside her; was a strange feeling, stranger still when he pulled out of her - she felt disconnected, like the intimacy between them was gone and the curtain had been pulled back to expose the reality that they were still no more than friends. But that was her idea, so she has no right to feel so hurt about it. This was what she wanted, what she asked for, and he had been perfect.

Oscar took some time to clean her up with an old t-shirt that had been draped over a chair by his bed by a bookshelf (full of books that Mari wanted to ask about, but felt that wasn’t the time) before he went to his dresser and handed her a large tee. She felt a funny sense of deja vu - the last time he did that was right before he rejected her advances and now here they were.

“Thank you,” she said as she slipped it over her head.

He nodded and grabbed a half-smoked cigar from the ashtray atop the dresser. He had already put it between his lips and had started to light it when he spoke.

“The bathroom is just across the hall,” he said, and then, “you should probably go,”

Mari felt like a bucket of ice had just been poured over her as the words hit her.

Only friends. Just sex. She reminded herself.

“Okay, yeah, uh, I should get home,” she agreed, trying to act cool as she sat up in the bed and scanned the room to find her clothes, “everyone is probably wondering where I am,”

Spooky laughed. He sat on the side of the bed and pulled her to him. She hit his solid shoulder with a soft thud and let out a small “oof”.

He tilted her chin so that she was looking at him and scooped down to capture her lips in a languid kiss. It was different to all the others they had shared that night, somehow. It wasn’t as hasty, as needy, as desperate. It was slow, all plump lips and warm tongues, like a beautiful dance instead of the battle it had been before. She liked it and she couldn’t help but think that it didn’t feel like a one-last-time.

“Mariana,” he breathed her name as he broke the kiss, “I meant you should go to the bathroom, not go. I want you to stay tonight,”

And she wanted to stay too. So that’s just what she did. She ran to the bathroom and rushed back to him, not wanting to waste any of the time she had convinced him to allow her. That night, as she lay in his arms, she felt warm and safe and so very not alone. She couldn’t help but hope that, just for this perfect night, the nightmares wouldn’t come.

.

Taglist: @grayberrydolan @lostgirl219 @kseniainneverland @ravengreystone @weediskindabad @moistdollerbills @javoqetal @kenzie44469 @goddessate @blackdepressoexpresso @classyputa @babygirl-htx @wonderlandlovelove @agent-femmefatale @elliesshitofablog @daydreamer0307 @lucyfuh @harduy @elizabeth-santana-98 @lonelyyblues

Message me if you’d like to be added to the list - if you have already done so and haven’t been tagged it’s because Tumblr won’t let me, sorry!

Also, I just want to remind everyone that this is a side blog so if you have any questions about the story/plot/characters please send me an ask so I can reply xxx

[sansy-fresh]

halp

It’s time for the Semi-Annual “Fresh is Never Leaving This Fandom!” fic idea tour! In which under the cut I’m going to talk about fics I’m currently working on and how much longer I expect them to be, as well as long fics I have ideas for and how lengthy I expect them to be in the long run. There’s gonna be probably spoilers so look away if you don’t wanna see them! Also this is really long so be prepared for that.

I’m also going to be discussing some of the mini series that people have funded recently, so there’s that lol

Anyways, ranting and rambling under the cut!! This is more or less a way to keep excited about some of my ideas and get some of you hyped as well ^^ (And also a way to assure anyone wondering “hey, fresh has been here for a while, are they ever leaving?” that the answer is no, apparently not)

Current Fics

Okay so I have around 5 long fics, 1 series, and 1 mini series I’m currently working on. They are as follows:

A Silver Chain: A fic about vampire Honey and polyruses with the other Paps being hunters. Is well on its way but needs re-done in a few places so its currently on hiatus.

Little Fangs: A fic about Dadby and older bro Papyrus with babybones and Badster. Is not even close to halfway done, depending on how far I end up going with the narrative. Might end up being one of the longest fics I write.

Moral Compass: A fic about assumed bad brothers and possible Blackcherry goodness. Is basically 3/4ths done at this point, isn’t meant to be a super long one. Was pretty much completely funded by @1readervb so shout out to them for being a super cool peep.

Hold Myself Together: A fic about Bad Bro Red and how Fell gets a better life. Just started, but based on how long the first iteration of this story was, I’d say this one will be a little longer than C&S ended up being. 

Garish: A fic about a Reader who ends up with the Swell bros as roommates. Might end up being both Reader/Swell bros and Reader/Fell bros, but I haven’t decided. Just started, might be a long one.

Bitter White Memory: A series about how Fell and Stretch get together based on an attempt to keep the Edgelord feeling safe. Only has two parts so far so nowhere near done. I’ve just been too busy to write the next part lol whoopsies

Cherries in Snow: A funded mini series about abused Red falling into Undertale, with Kustard and a little tiny helping of Cherryblossom. One chapter so far, but there should only be about five so it won’t take super long.

There’s also two more mini series that have been funded, but one I only have part of the info on and the other I have no info on, so they haven’t been started yet. (One of them is about Omega Paps in a A/B/O world so that’ll be fun ;;;))

Fics I want to Continue/Rewrite

This is a list I didn’t know I was adding until I was in the middle of making this post. There are a few fics I’ve started and then pretty much abandoned, or that I left behind because I no longer wanted to write them. They are:

The Reset Conundrum: A fic that I wrote a long time ago and never finished about Papyrus and Sans going through the Resets and various endings together, with a happy ending of course. It was a popular one, but I never finished it because I got bored with the idea. I was thinking about it recently and kind of wanted to revisit the idea. Its on this list because I might just do it.

The Ole Razzle Dazzle: A fic I started and then revamped as a fic about Razz and Slim and how they react to a pacifist Chara moving through the Underground. Kinda looking forward to this one, not going to lie.

Sparks and Wires: A fic that I started because of my love for the game D:BH and its androids. About Android Honey and his owner Fell, and how they fall in love. Basically self indulgent Spicyhoney lol

Long Fic Ideas

So just about once every other week I get a new fic idea, and if I like them enough (and can actually imagine myself writing them) I write them down in a doc. Now I’m going to talk about them all in as much detail as I have so ya’ll get comfy this is gonna be a long’n. (These are not up for adoption they are things I plan to write myself.)

The Great: A fic idea @badgertablet came up with and I helped round out. Ambassador Paps with a side of Polyruses and lots of angsty pining and hurt/comfort. Is going to be a longer fic, since there’s a lot of background stuff and quite a bit to set up. I’m really really looking forward to this one though, is going to be a gift for Badg (but shoosh no one tell them).

Family Portrait: A fic idea for Middle Bro Gaster with Paps and Sans. Basically going from Sans’ birth to Gaster falling into the Core to the kid saving everyone and Sans pulling Gaster back out of the Void. Is going to be super long, so probably won’t get to this one for a while lol

Scattered Pieces: A fic idea for a character getting bitties that helps their life out. Lots of angst and hurt/comfort, as each bitty has its own backstory of woe. One I’ve had planned for a while but haven’t been able to sit down a write.

A Concerted Effort: A fic idea where Fell and Stretch have a one night stand and Fell ends up pregnant. The two of them don’t get along super well most of the time so its not like he can tell him, right?? Another old idea I just haven’t started yet lol.

Itty Bitty Teenie Weenie: A fic idea where a different character gets some specialty bitties, ones that need a bit more help than others. In the same universe as Scattered Pieces, probably going to be written after that one.

Segregation: A fic idea that @nurse-gaster came up with that I adopted. Bledgeup in a world where Fell monsters and Tale monsters live on different sides of the fence, a literal fence in this case. Going to be a gift for Nurse when I start writing it lol.

Recovery: A fic idea where a personal character of mine fosters special needs bitties and ends up with one for himself. Is part of a two fic series. 

Caramelized Apples: A fic idea where my Caramel version of Slim ends up pregnant. I haven’t decided how yet, but its hurt/comfort and fluff, so no hard angst here!

Edgy but Smiling: A fic idea where an anxious Reader ends up with a Sansy and an Edgy who just want a good home. 

You Got Me All Fired Up: A fic idea with Sans/Dante (my UF Grillby). I don’t know I just really like Sans and Fellby together and I want to write a slowburn.

Harried and Torn: A fic idea about Spicykustardpuff with lots of angst and hurt/comfort and maybe some fluff along the way. A slowburn because I’m a masochist.

Nice To Eat’cha: A fic idea based on the Asian side of the fandom’s art of Farmer Sans/HT Sans. Won’t be farmer Sans, but it will be a slowburn of Sans and Butch learning how to not judge each other for their own sins.

Seen in Glorious Splendor: A fic idea I had earlier today actually. King Fell, with possible Edgepuff or Polyruses, I haven’t decided yet. My own take on how Fell takes over as King of the Underground from Asgore.

There are a lot of iterations of Skelebros/Reader I want to write, so I’m just throwing a blanket over them called “Eventually”. Them being namely Swap Bros/Reader, Tale Bros/Reader, a reverse harem in my style, HT Bros/Reader, and something just Papyrus/Reader (which Papyrus you ask? all.)

And my Magnum Opus, Safe House, will be the last fic I write for this fandom. So when I start posting that, you’ll know we’re nearing the end.

[explosively-psycho-a]

((Last Fic in the house hunt. It took way longer than I wanted. I crashed creatively halfway through this whole project. But it’s done, this is their place. This is where they will spend their weekends, where I’ll be hosting some threads, and where they can go as a couple. 

I wanna thank @crxckedxce and @moonsmultimuse for allowing me to write their muses during this project and event. Here’s one easter egg, I wrote myself as their landlady. I didn’t lie about myself at all. I think I gave myself a rather cool quirk.

Enjoy!))

Toshi turned the car off at the next place, he needed a break. This was the fifth place of the evening and he wasn’t the best shape anymore to go on these long drives. The last house had been rather taxing for them all and the back seat had fallen eerily silent for the last bit of distance. The outrage the pair felt most likely gone and faded away like a bad headache. Sunken in eyes cast back over the seat to check, finding the pair in silence for sure.

Blonde hair tucked under the chin of the other man as fingers sat laced together in the middle of them. Toshi cleared his throat, causing crimson eyes as well as mismatched eyes to look up. Both pairs looked a little red and puffy. The old retired man smile, “We’re here...last place. Looks…”

He looked out the car window, seeing a small glowing window aside a newly painted front door with a small step in. Aside the door was small flowering pots of soft pink-white flowers with crinkled petals. The small mailbox at the front of the door opened at the top with a roll of paper sticking out, the local paper.

“Sweet. Sweet and peaceful.” He finished at last as he glanced back once again. The two in the back moved to look out as well, seeing the small flowers and silent door. Whispers came and went from them. Toshi couldn’t help but know the feeling of the knot in their guts from the last place.

Doors opened and the two filed out, hands laced together tightly with a new resolve. Don’t go in if the landlords didn’t like this fact first. There was no point going in with the wrong idea, get it out in the open right off the bat. Toshi took in a breath seeing them, Shoto stepping in front and taking a lead...walking with shoulders set, a protective stance to the blonde behind him. He’d really come into his own lately as a hero, looking to put himself out there for others...to take the brunt of the world’s force, for good or ill.

And here’s where things seemed strange to the older man, the blonde...Bakugo, normally so headstrong, so full of fire, and so willing to charge right in palms blazing...was taking the back seat to the young man in front of him leading him softly by the hand. His bottom lip caught between his teeth as he was tugged along, brows knitted up and shoulders stiff. His free hand balled into a fist at his side.

Long legs didn’t take long to catch up once the button was pressed and the car beeped. He caught up just as Sho raised a hand to tap knuckles against the door and wait, Katsuki still at his back and chewing on that bottom lip. He was done for the day after this...even if this place didn’t work out.

“Second!!” A voice filtered from behind the closed door and someone seemed to stumble and curse till the door was yanked open. “Hi there, hahaha. Sorry sorry, please come in, come in.”

At the door was a short little chubby woman with wavy brown hair...who was very out of breath. She motioned them in all the same, nearly tripping over the step inside the place as well. She cursed again, glaring at the little step before smiling at the three that came inside. “Forgive the little mess, I wanted to make the place a little...more comforting? I was almost late really and  just…”

“Is that Soba?”

He paused looking to where the mismatched man pointed. Indeed on the table was a small bowl of store bought ready to eat soba along with a few other containers. The woman smiled and leaned back on her feet to breath in deep. “YUP! Why, want some? You can have it. I know it would make you feel better.”

“That’s rather kind of you, miss. But that wouldn’t be all that becomin’ of my stud--”

“It’s okay, it’s okay. He can have it. It will make him feel better. I bought it for that.”

“Bought it...for...that?”

“My quirk told me to get it. You see, I can see the mood auras of people that are coming to visit me. You three are rather...umm, pissed? Or Melancholy, that the damn word for it. Fuck if I know.”

Three sets of eyes met and look at each other. “That’s rather...interesting.”

“You think so, I hate people normally. Refuse to work with the public. Nothing like trying to help people and seeing the exact second someone is done with your shit. ANYWAY, who’s hungry or do you wanna see the place?”

Bakugo couldn’t really hold it in, he snorted. She was blunt. He was bringing a hand up to his face to cover the growing smile as he tapped his hand against his hip...Sho’s hand still wrapped in his own. He snorted again watching the woman wave her hands in at them, fingers fanned out as if to draw an answer from them. “...Yeah, uhh, let’s see the place first unless this mess can’t be reheated.”

“It can be reheated! It’ll just taste like rubber.” But she was game to let them see the little apartment first. Motioning to the room they were standing in. “This is the main living space that’s NOT a bedroom. Small entrance way with a shoe cabinet, shelf and doorbell with a screen. I installed that myself…”

He motioned with one arm to the door just to the left along the wall, “Toilet, next door is the shower room with sink and washer. No tub, sorry. And along the wall behind you...if you look with your eyes is the kitchen. Not a full kitchen, there’s no fish stove. Three burners and full sink. Enough counter space for rice cooker and mini oven. There is a full-size fridge, it’s about a year old.”

With that explained she turned, waving a hand again for the three to follow as she pulled open the only door left in the place. “Bedroom, enough room for a decent size bed for a couple. Window facing the back street and it does open...but I don’t have a screen on it yet. Use it like a fire escape or something.”

Inside was a desk with a single wooden chair, a wardrobe and a small wall mounted AC unit. “Warning, the AC is rather loud. I kicked it once and it stopped for like...an hour but…”

Again the blonde as Sho’s side had to hold back something. The small woman could only sigh, “Glad I’m amusing. Well, that’s all of it. The whole place, it’s not big at all but perfect for a couple kids and a…uhh…”

“Teacher. It’s complicated. These are a pair of my students, yes, but they are different.”

“They are dating, I get that.”

All three men froze on the spot. All three waiting for the worst, waiting for the ‘get out, you’re not welcome’ after the last place. But they got nothing, nothing they were expecting. Just for the small chubby woman to push politely past the old retired hero and start unpacking shopping bags on the table. The table that was to come with the place. Each item set between four table settings.

“Best friends don’t hold hands like that or have connected mood auras like that. You might see a small bit of bleed between people like that, or even twins but...lovers? They are like a set, two colors mixing in the middle to create one smooth circle. I knew the second I opened the door.”

Sho let his guard down, feeling his shoulder slack and the grip he held on the other man’s hand going looser. The hold becoming more casual than protective. It felt like the ball of worry and ready anger just passed...like he’d finally swallowed a weighted lump in his throat. At last, he wanted that soba on the table for real...and not for politeness sake.

It was a little strange, sharing a store-bought dinner with some stranger that you were looking at the house of to rent. But the longer they hung out, the longer they talked and asked questions the more they felt at home. At some point, Toshi had excused himself to check out the toilet and shower room. He came back with a small thumbs up and a smile. The new landlady had pulled out a small tube like object connected to a box...a vape, and started to blow sweet smelling mist after their smell meal.

“Seems you three are happy enough with the place. I wanna talk price for this rental agreement. I know I listed one on the site but that was a little high just to run away the riff-raff. Call me picky or whatever, I don’t want just anyone living under my roof.”

“Completely understandable. So the price too low or?”

“Too high, for high school kids, I’m willing to come down some just to give them some room to grow. Even if they have part-time jobs or something, they are gonna be living on pocket change.”

The idea of a discount without real cause made Sho sit forward, nearly opening his mouth to protest. But a large hand came up to hush any protest as the old man smiled and nodded. “You’re a reasonable woman, they are just kids even at this age. I’m sure we can all work something out that works.”

“Ha..ha...you call me reasonable now, you just wait. That might change, I’m no hero. Never had the mind to be one...We’ll work something out. Just keep in mind one thing, don’t lie to me. I can see it, literally.”

***

Toshi had tried to talk the pair out of signing anything before they had a chance to sleep on it, but Bakugo wasn’t having it. He’d liked the place, had sat silently during dinner and thought it over. All the while holding Sho’s hand still under the table. He wanted the place, he wanted to move in that night, he swore he was ready.

It didn’t help that the new landlady seemed really good at ruffling the right feathers here and there on all three to get pen to paper. The old mind gave out after seeing the smile that came to the younger pair’s faces after things were set in stone. Nor could he fight his own set of butterflies as one of the pair let out an almost inhuman noise the moment they were out the door. Watching as arm circled each other and both men were pressing faces together in contained joy.

They did it, their first steps out. Their first place, their first real home. Something they had, just them. The drive home was filled with chatter and warm giggles. Full of ‘what if’s and ‘can we do’ this or that questions.

“I can’t say what you can and can’t do, young men. This is your place. You make all those choices now.”

“Holy fuck....it...it really is!”

“Gorgeous.”

“IT’S OURS, SHO! OURS!!”

[carisi-dreams]

let’s talk about sonny in 19.15

going to get back to asks/prompts tomorrow, but I’m super tired all of a sudden. to tide y’all over I thought I’d share this mini fic I wrote last night based on the events of 19.15  //

FINALLY watched this week’s episode & I have some Thoughts™  re Sonny x reader:

-you know something is seriously wrong when Sonny shows up at your apartment late on Wednesday with a tense, distraught look on his face & none of the characteristic peppy energy.

-‘can I come in?’ is the first thing he says when you open the door, with a harshness in his voice you’ve never heard aimed in your direction before

-you nod, already gesturing him in because aside from the body language & the tone he’s never hesitated to come in before. ‘sonny, of course. come in. is everything okay? it’s 11pm.’

-you shut & lock the door behind him, assuming he’s spending the night. he’s shaking his head no, hands roughly running through his hair as he begins to pace

-‘no, it’s not. I found out today that my niece was raped. three months ago. the school had some, some kinda tribunal or whatever the hell and found him guilty today. but the scumbag is only suspended for a year. suspended!’

-you’re completely shocked by the news & go to make your way over to him before he cuts you off with a flung out hand. ‘and the best part? my sister is just now telling me. today! months after the fact! I don’t know what the hell she was thinking keeping this from me! I’m going to kill this guy-suspended?! he deserves to go to prison!’ he continues, gesturing largely with his hands as he loosens his tie.

-‘I’m so sorry, sonny. I’m so sorry. this isn’t your fault, not at all babe. sonny, come on. let’s get you out of this suit. let’s get some food in you, okay? we can sit & talk some more. I’ll call out of work tomorrow if I need to, alright? I’m going to make you some tea. come here, let me—‘ ‘I don’t want any tea, (y/n)! I don’t wanna-I don’t wanna eat thai food & pretend like this is okay & just—just-listen. I’m thinking rationally, alright? you don’t need to try to talk me off the ledge like I’m some kinda loose cannon, ‘ he interrupts.

-you make your way over to him, despite how tightly wound he is & how his gestures get more agitated as he speaks.’hey, hey-hey! I’m on your side, sonny. I’m on your team. I’m here for you. you came to me tonight. you came here & I just want to-‘ ‘maybe I shouldn’t have come. I can go back to my apartment. I’m upsetting you. I apologize,’ he interrupts again, going to brush by you to leave.

-‘stop, dominick,’ you grab his arm before he can take two steps, ‘I want you here. I’m glad you came here,’ you say, tugging at his arm to force him to look at you. ‘but you didn’t come here to self-destruct-you would have gone home alone if you wanted to do that. you came here because you trust me, & I trust you, and you know I’m going to look after you.’ ‘I can take care of myself. it was wrong of me to come here when I’m as angry as I am,’ he replies firmly.

-‘if you want to walk out of that door you can. I won’t stop you again. but if you want to stay, you can. I’m not afraid of your anger, but I am afraid of you being alone right now and I’d like you to stay. please,’ you beseech him.

-he studies your face & must see something in his eyes because all of a sudden the fire that was brimming over goes right out. his body goes limp & he brings a hand up to his face, dropping your gaze. you go to him and he wraps his arms around you. with his mouth muffled against the side of your head he murmurs, ‘I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do. I’m so—angry. I feel so helpless. I feel like I let my family down. I didn’t know where else to go.’

-‘you can always come here, sonny. always. will you sit down for me?’ you ask. he nods & you lead him to the couch. he begins to loosen his tie with one hand, the other arm still around you, before you gently knock his fingers away from his neck. ‘I got this. you just sit there, amore mio.* hmm? I got you,’ you murmur as you continue to loosen it. he takes his gun & badge off and sets them on the coffee table. shoes are absentmindedly toed off. you unbutton his vest next, shifting to give him room to shrug off the jacket before shedding the layer underneath.

-he leans back again with a strong exhale, the hand not around you is tapping erratically on his knee. he won’t hold eye contact with you, but his grip around your waist is firm.

-‘I just feel like I gotta do something, y’know? like I’m just wasting time sitting here not doing a single thing,’ he slashes the air with his other hand, voice lower but still full of pain. you reach a hand out to turn his face so that he looks at you instead of across the room. ‘you’re doing something right now. you believe her. you support her. you’re advocating for her. and now you’re going to recharge & rest so that when you go back to work you can be helpful, not rundown. you’re going to let me take care of you and you’re going to take a shower and you’re going to sleep right next to me and know that I believe you. I support you. I know you’ll figure out what to do because you’re a smart man & you’re exactly the detective I would want on my case if I was in that position.’

-‘please, don’t even put that image in my head. not if you want me to come down off the ceiling sometime tonight. I’m going to take a shower,’ he goes to stand, turning to look back at you still sitting on the couch. his face softens, ‘that offer for tea still stand? I’ll make the shower quick & meet you in bed?’

-you quirk up the corner of your lips slightly & nod. ‘I’ll meet you in bed, detective.’

-you sit a little longer as he heads to the bathroom. it’s only after you hear the water running for a couple of moments that you go to make tea for you both.

-he comes out of the shower in boxer briefs, still damp around the ears with hair all over his head. he crawls into the bed in the side closest to the door. you’re reading & glance up quickly before finishing your sentence & placing the bookmark in its place on the page you were reading, ‘made you the bedtime tea,’ you tell him as you stretch to put your book on the nightstand and grab your own tea.

-you turn back to him & he’s looking at you intensely. he gently takes your mug from your hands & places it on the bedside table next to him, not even needing to turn to know exactly where it was without spilling tea. ‘doll, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I didn’t even greet you or ask how your day was or if I was interrupting your evening. you just let me come in & I acted like an asshole. I did this wrong,’ he tells you, cupping your face in one of his hands. he tucks hair behind your ear while studying your face.

-‘you don’t need to apologize, sonny. I know how much you love your family. I can only imagine how upset you feel. I don’t expect you to be perfect, I’m here for you,’ you reply. ‘yeah, I love my family. but I love you, too and you don’t deserve how I came in here. thank you for being here for me, it means the world,’ he murmurs, leaning in to kiss you. one of your hands reaches up to grasp his forearm as you kiss him back. ‘cuore mio,’ ** you murmur, ‘Sei l’uomo dei miei sogni.’

-‘fuck, you know how much it kills me to hear you speak in Italian,’ he manages to get out between kisses. ‘well I mean it. in Italian & English. you’re the love of my life. my heart. my sunshine. hmm? I’ve got you, I’ve got y-‘ he cuts you off with more kisses, deepening the kiss as he draws you down into the bed with him over you. ‘you’re mine. Mi hai cambiato la vita.*** I promise I’ll always keep you safe. I promise. Ti voglio sempre al mio fianco,’ ****he insists. ‘I’m not going anywhere, Dominick. I’m right here. I’m safe. come on, let’s drink some tea. you need to get some rest.’

-he reluctantly rolls off of you & sits up. handing you back your tea and wrapping you up in one arm, holding you tightly against his chest. he grabs his tea once your hands are securely around your own cup. he nuzzles into your temple, alternating between pressing kisses to it in between sips of tea. he begins to tell you some stories of mia when she was a baby as he calms down even more.

-he finishes his tea & sets the mug down again before saying, ‘I’m going to get this guy, (y/n). I have to.’ ‘I believe you. but at the end of the day, no matter what happens, this is not your fault. you’re a great uncle, an incredible brother & a wonderful boyfriend,’ you reply quietly. he lets a beat go by, ‘yeah. I guess.’ another beat, ‘I don’t know how long this investigation is going to last or what state of mind I’ll be in, & I’ll understand if you say ‘no’ so there’s no pressure, doll. none whatsoever. but if you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to be able to come back here everyday. just while this investigation is going on-I swear I’m not trying to move in. I’d be much smoother about that-I /will/ be one day. I just, I need to not be alone with my thoughts at the end of the night.’

-you turn your head slightly so you can look up at him again. he looks a little nervous & you lean up to kiss the side of his chin. ‘you can stay here as long as you need to. I’ll even give you my spare keys.’

-he exhales loudly, closing his eyes briefly in relief. ‘thank you, doll’ he says as he gently tilts your chin up for a kiss. ‘let’s go to sleep. I know you’ve got work tomorrow-or rather later on today. don’t want to keep you up any longer.’

-you both shift slightly, turning the lamps out on your respective sides. you lay your head on his chest as he wraps his arm back around you. his hand traces patterns on your back. ‘close your eyes, babe. let your brain rest for a couple of hours, hmm? let me recite some poetry to you until you fall asleep,’ you tell him, sensing that his eyes were still open. he hums in response & relaxes slightly.

-you close your eyes before beginning in a steady, quiet voice, ‘

S'un casto amor, s'una pietà superna,***** S'una fortuna infra dua amanti equale, S'un'aspra sorte all'un dell'altro cale, S'un spirto, s'un voler duo cor governa; S'un'anima in duo corpi è fatta etterna, Ambo levando al cielo e con pari ale; S'amor c'un colpo e d'un dorato strale Le viscer di duo petti arda e discerna; S'amar l'un l'altro, e nessun se medesmo, D'un gusto e d'un diletto, a tal mercede, C'a un fin voglia l'uno e l'altro porre; Se mille e mille non sarien centesmo A tal nodo d'amore, a tanta fede; E sol l'isdegno il può rompere e sciorre…’ *

--🌸

*my love

**my heart // you’re the man of my dreams

***You changed my life

****I want you always by my side

****If there is a chaste love, a heavenly pity, an equal fortune between two lovers, a bitter fate shared by both, and if a single spirit and one will governs two hearts; if one soul in two bodies is made eternal, raising both to heaven on the same wings; if love with one blow and one golden arrow can burn and pierce two hearts to the core; if each loves the other rather than himself, with a pleasure and delight so rewarding, that to the same end they both strive; if thousands upon thousands are not worth a hundredth part of such a loving bond of such a faith; then shall anger alone break and dissolve it?