#i wrote one sentence and boom: a whole fucken paragraph

[chilei-writes-weewoo]

apparently i got possessed by some dead author or something and wrote. yes for honkai star rail fight me. yanqing this time because i love the little man

every time he smiles - oh that warm and soft smile, like spring sunlight filtering through the canopy overhead - i feel something shift inside of my body. it’s almost like leaves unfurling after a particularly cruel winter, or flowers blooming from a refreshing spring rain in my chest. it’s like worms unearthing during heavy rain in autumn, or the lone plum blossoms enduring a heavy snow storm. it makes no sense to me, but i dont mind.

his smile is captivating in a way a child’s smile is captivating: there is no self-consciousness, no hidden secrets. when i see him smile, i get the urge to smile with him, despite the fact that my smile could never even hope to achieve the radiance of his. i’ve seen him smile at the seemingly ever stoic Master Diviner and get her to smile, slightly, but a smile is a smile. i swear to the Aeons, wherever they are, his smile could soften anyone’s heart.

he’s frequently busy, constantly training with his swords, but he never complains. when i sometimes manage to find him, he actually looks like he’s enjoying it. these times he always spots me, no matter how hard i try to blend in with the bushes, and gives me one of the warmest smiles i’ve seen; his cheeks are slightly flushed from exerting himself during training; his eyes reflect the sunlight, making them look like little ponds of liquid gold; a few small, glistening drops of sweat sliding down his chin and forehead; and his lips curl into a sweet smile that even rivals the sun’s radiance and warmth. i never bring a camera with me when i go looking for him, but i’m starting to think i should. not that i expect the camera to be able to capture the moment as well as my eyes see it happening, but i have to try. at least once.

his smile is the best after i ruffle his hair. his face scrunches up slightly as a small giggle escapes his lips. he always tries to act disgruntled afterwards as he turns away from me to smooth his hair back into place, grumbling about how i messed up his hair, but i manage to catch a glimpse of a small smile. i dont know why he’s deemed it necessary to hide it from me, but i dont find it necessary to think too hard about these things.

if his smile is already radiant, then i’m afraid i’m out of words to describe his laugh. it’s like a dewdrop at the break of dawn, when the sunlight is the colour of harvest-ready barley fields, and the air smells of a cold night meeting the warm morning sun. it’s like a small stream rippling down a mountainside as the oncoming spring melts the heaps of snow gathered on tree branches. it’s like walking on the beach while holding your shoes in your hand as the sea laps at your ankles, watching the sun set below the horizon and painting the waves with a golden path to an endless journey.

his laugh is energizing, like taking a dive into the half frozen lake in the middle of the winter. it’s like taking a stroll in autumn while it’s storming like the end of the world is approaching. when i hear his laugh i want to take his smaller hand into mine and run through the town. his laugh makes me want to have a sparring match with him, or even the general himself. i would fight the Aeons themselves to hear him laugh.

his smile, and laugh for that matter, wouldnt be complete without his eyes. his eyes, wide and accepting, curious in their own way, reflecting the colour of the sun as if it was their own. his eyes are the most beautiful in the mornings when the sun rises, golden rays peeking just above the foggy horizon. a close second would be when the sun sets, warmth of a long day slowly giving way to the cool of night, as the moon rises as a pale mirror for the sun to shine upon the streets even at night. during these fleeting moments, his eyes are the most beautiful. maybe just because it’s so fleeting and momentary. maybe because i only get to see one of these moments in a day, sometimes neither.

without the warmth in his eyes, his smile wouldnt be nearly as lovely as it is. i remember once as he was taking a break from training and taking a stroll with me through the streets, someone flew a kite into my face. as i struggled to untangle the toy from my hair, i could only hear him laugh. i managed to lift the kite slightly, to see the bottom half of his face. as radiant as his smile was, and as bright as his laugh sounded, i felt that it was missing something crucial. lifting the kite a little more (and probably tearing out a few strands of my hair), i see his eyes, scrunched up in laughter, small teardrops gathering at the corners of his eyes. instantly, i feel that the picture is complete in my head.

it’s not only his smile that’s radiant; it’s him as a whole: personality, mannerisms, actions, speech patterns, and - of course - his smile. he’s still a child, but i can see him growing up to a wonderful adult with many fawning over him, young and old. ah, that reminds me, i should probably check in with the conductor, see if i can manage to convince them to come back in a few years. i’d love to watch him grow up, but duty calls. i really should take a picture before we leave.