#i wrote a bunch of angsty osomatsu san fics back in the day

[pets-will-play-ask-blog]

Author! You've mentioned other stories you've written in the past not being as dark as this one. Did you just recently get into dark fics then?

I'm gonna say yes. I've never really been a dark fic writer. I suffer from intrusive thoughts brought on by OCD so I've always had ideas involving darker themes but I didn't start actually putting them on paper until now. And frankly, I'm glad I waited until I was an adult. I cannot imagine how badly teenage me would have handled the themes I write about now.

And it's not that my other stories are less dark. It's just that they're...less grounded? I suppose They're more surreal. The situations of tragedy and drama within them are still related to real world trauma- abuse, parental loss, PTSD, grief...but the worlds and the characters within them are way less realistic. More fantasy. With worlds that are purposefully meant to be fantastical and whimsical and very obviously not real. So it's easier for myself and the readers to distance themselves from the icky feelings that reading about those themes normally bring.

Not that PWP isn't whimsical and fantasy, but the characters and world are a LOT more similar to our actual reality. Yes, some people have animal features. But also- there's sex trafficking, and late stage capitalism, and uncomfortably realistic abusive relationships with uncomfortably realistic characters. Also, relationship and sexual trauma is something that I have been through. So it's a lot closer to home than anything else I've ever written about.

Let me put it this way: Those other stories are escapism for me. Pets Will Play is a way for me to actually deal with my own trauma without going to therapy because I can't afford it and talking about my feelings is hard.