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eriexplosion · 2 years

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Idk how to copy paste emoji on phone very well but Happy, Angsty, Shippy and Family for Echo Badbatch and Athelstan Vikings bc I am, nothing if not Predictable. Also Crosshair bc ilu 💜

*Rubs my gay little hands together* Hope you're ready to read because I am not joking when I say all this came out to over 1500 words.

Echo first, our beloved sad bby.

🟡 - Happy

99 Always watched over their batch from the very beginning and probably the first real memory they have of an ori'vod paying specific attention to them was 99 stopping what he was doing to check on them after a hard training session. It was right after they got their name, when they still very much did not appreciate it, and the best way they could think of to protest was to go to the opposite end and just completely clam up. Can't be an Echo if you just don't talk. 99 aas the one to check on them all crammed up in a tiny corner and he coaxed them out and got them talking again - when he talked, he made it seem okay to be an Echo, and that was a first step to embracing the name their batch gave them, even if it still took some time to completely accept it.

...This came out more bittersweet than fully happy but. I TRIED.

🔴 - Angsty/Sad

Rex had to be the one to bring Fives up to them after they were rescued. Not because they weren't thinking about him, they were, ever since they came out of the fridge and saw that he wasn't there to greet them. But they knew Fives wouldn't have EVER passed up the chance to save them, so... if he isn't here, they already know why. It'll be painful to find out how he died, they know he's dead, and they're already in so much pain as it is both emotionally and physically that they've been terrified to bring it up. Rex knows what they're doing, so he lets it go for a little while but he can't let them leave with the batch without having this conversation, which is just as painful as they both expected it to be.

🟣 - Romantic/Sexual/Shippy

Echo is SO so shy when it comes to romance, especially coming into the Batch. They're the New person and very much coming in on a highly established team with longstanding relationships between them, and they didn't come in with expectations of ever being anything but the outsider. They are in fact SO resigned to always being the outsider that they do not notice they're being flirted with for several weeks. Tech is the first one to give up on subtlety and just ask them if they're interested in being more than Squadmates.

👪 - Family

Echo, as a reg, has the best relationship with the vode in general. Where the batch is super reluctant to intermingle due to the general tensions that have managed to root in between them and the regs, to Echo they're still very much important Family. And so they take it super personally when things keep erupting into food fight violence. They really thought they'd have more time to try to work on getting everyone to get along.

Unfortunately, instead, Order 66 happened. And now not even their batch family is together anymore. This is just going to make them more desperate though to make everyone get along as they meet up with more vode, though, because goddamnit there are not enough clones left to be fighting like this.

Crosshair next to keep the Batch babes together:

🟡 - Happy

He's actually in a good mood much more often than most people would assume, he just doesn't show it in ways that anyone outside of his batch would notice. Happy Crosshair tends to sit closer to people, sometimes lean his whole weight on them, it's like having a cat really. People that aren't used to it tend to think he's trying to aggressively get in their space to prove a point, which is what Echo thought at first when he started planting himself directly in their way all the time until they actually got to know him more.

🔴 - Angsty/Sad

Do I dare do the Lula headcanon? Do I? I think I do.

Lula wasn't always just the name of a stuffed toy. Once, a few regs got their hands on a tooka that they brought back to Kamino for the cadets to take a look at, since the kids don't get off planet except for the occasional starship tour bringing back small animals is always a huge hit for the children.

Wrecker managed to get his hands on the little tooka and brought it back to their room, named her Lula, and absolutely adored the little creature just as much as he loves his Lula now. It's adorable. But this is a Crosshair headcanon, so where does he come in?

Well, the kaminoans didn't think much of the distraction of a pet, but they let Wrecker keep it for a short while because they saw potential for a test. She turns up missing Wrecker is losing his entire mind, and in the middle of it all Crosshair gets called in for a solo test. There's just one target, and the real test isn't if he can hit her it's if he'll do what he's told even though it will destroy Wrecker. He does, but not because of any real will to follow orders, he just knows it will be worse for them if he doesn't. He makes the replacement Lula to try to make up for it - it's not the same, but it's all he can do. (If this sounds similar to my Twelve Seconds fic it's because I imagine they did this to him multiple times with increasingly brutal targets to make sure he actually would shoot anything he was directed to before putting the batch out in the field.)

🟣 - Romantic/Sexual/Shippy

He probably gets the most hookups outside of the batch and literally no one knows HOW he manages this, because it's not his pleasant demeanor. Hitting on people usually takes the form of antagonizing them and seeing if they smack him or make out with him first and somehow people keep taking the second one.

He also tends to mood drop after them, but still won't recognize that this probably means there's something he's not getting out of it (like actual companionship) and so he comes back upset half the time to lay down with one of them and Radiate Sadness. Usually Wrecker, because he has the most Comforting presence and they've been together the longest by FAR.

👪 - Family

It is pretty much his only priority at all actually. There is a reason he takes it SO hard when he thinks they've abandoned him and it's because he has genuinely not at any point bothered to find anything else to live for. (And the reason he's still going at this point is that he does hope that they'll push back against his attitude and just make him come home so he can save face by not having been the one to give in first.)

Also the softest part of his brain really envies the life Cut and his family have, far away from fighting, but he tries not to listen to that part of himself because he's 1000% sure that kind of life is not for them.

And SOFT BOY ATHELSTAN:

🟡 - Happy

Athelstan keeps all of his journals as they fill up, so that he can look back on them and reflect. This means that he ends up with dozens of these, and he can open any of them to a random page and easily guess when he did it just by what he finds there. Even if it's just a sketch, how he draws the world and people around him changes as he shifts from being afraid to truly feeling like he belongs.

This means he can go back and usually pinpoint right around where he started to fall in love with someone, because he can see it in how his art of them changes.

🔴 - Angsty/Sad

Even years down the line he still has nightmares about his dead brothers. He's tried to move on from it and make peace and in many ways he has, but the nightmares haven't gone anywhere. Sometimes he thinks he's forgotten his brothers faces but then the bad dreams make it very much apparent that he hasn't.

These are also the only dreams that Ragnar can't help much with, which drives him insane because Ragnar HATES to think there's anything he can't fix. But this is one of them.

🟣 - Romantic/Sexual/Shippy

His favorite way to wake up is kisses, so he gets them every morning now from SOMEONE. Usually Ragnar or Floki will get him up this way but if they're not available metamours will do it (Helga especially loves to give him an adorable kiss to the cheek and make him make a SQUEAK of surprise.)

Of course being in a partner's arms just makes it better, please hold him while he wakes up. (This also helps when he's been having bad dreams, which he has OFTEN. As long as they're not the above mentioned brother nightmares that is.)

👪 - Family

So obviously my headcanons and fic go off the rails sometime around season three but I adore Alfred too much to let him go just because of something as small as 'Athelstan isn't fucking Judith in this version' so therefore. Athelstan has baby Alfred with someone else, in this verse Helga. They're not Together as a couple, but they're close and Helga is happy to parent a child with him, once a polycule becomes Complex enough it's all just coparenting anyway.

Also they're precious together so sue me. He loves her, and whether it's romantic or not really doesn't matter to him, she's just important to him.

#Eri Answers #The Bad Batch #cloneshipping #Vikings #My Vikings headcanons become increasingly specific and more unhinged from canon but you know #we're having fun here #headcanon posts

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acourtofthought · 1 year

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for the love of god its like every once in a while when e/riels can't find anything to prove that gwynriel won't happen they bring gwyn's SA like they're actually proving a good point.... SHUT THE F**K UP PLS

nothing makes me more mad than them talking about gwyn's SA like they know how she feels bc if they knew they wouldn't even dare to think about those disgusting things!!!

pls share these comments and ppl experiences so these supposed concern about gwyn's health can see how people of SA feels about sex and gwyn's character: https://www.instagram.com/p/CSh2iFnIbzO/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

they're so disgusting and this is only a fictional character but they forgot sarah also wrote these characters base on the real event. someone like gwyn exist in real life and something similar happened to them!!

and it's not just gwyn also rhysand and lucien!!! bc these two are 1. men 2. they threaten other ships (e/riel and fey/in). i haven't seen anyone saying nesta is lying about her SA bc she's not threatening any other ship or i don't see anyone fault her for drowning herself in sex and alcohol after her SA...

they also ignore what happened to feyre and what tamlin did to her bc they don't even see that as an assault and saying "feyre overreacted" and "tamlin pANiCkEd he didn't mean it" and let me tell you no feyre didn't overreacted and tamlin very much meant it, i've been in feyre's place...

honestly this fandom is degrading everyday and i'm so sorry for them.

TW: Sexual Assault I adore the link you shared, thank you so much. It was very empowering to read someone's experience and what they felt comfortable with. Not all SA survivors are going to be the same. Some may need a year before they're ready, some may need longer, some may need less than that and the link you shared is an example of what worked for them and something I hope we're all really happy to see. So any post where someone claims Gwyn MUST follow a specific timeframe because her SA assault happened over 2 1/2 years ago (by the end of SF), that because she did XYZ since then, it means she won't be ready for a physical relationship for a specific amount of time after, is a post that should not exist. I've noticed in this day and age, people like to toss around that all opinions are valid but that's a misnomer. Not all opinions are equal and valid and this one such example. If you claim you have a degree that makes you qualified to diagnose that Gwyn is not ready, you'd be wrong. A real therapist would understand that unless they had the chance to directly ask Gwyn questions related to her state of mind when it comes to relationships and her assault then no one should ever bring their degree into things. They should not be claiming they are an expert on her character based off the limited information we read about while she had a conversation with her friends under stressful circumstances. And no therapist would EVER place a time frame on when their client is ready to move forward, that is for the client to decide and the therapist to simply guide them to self awareness as to what's right for them. The only person who will be telling us if Gwyn is ready is SJM and if Gwyn is Azriel's love interest then guess what? There is a 99.9% chance that there will be intimacy as these are romance books and she has written sex into every single one of hers. Just as Rhys was ready, just as Lucien will be ready if he gets a book. And if Gwynriel is endgame, of which there are many possible hints for regardless of what some in the fandom claim, the author has said that Az is kinky which means anyone drawing fanart of Gwynriel bondage is completely justified in how they got from point A to point B. Maybe they'll have missed the mark and SJMs version of kink will deviate from that however it does not make those who commission or draw the art wrong for their current interpretation. It does not do a disservice to the character of Gwyn. Claiming it's a disservice is basically someone saying to a survivor "you were assaulted but I don't feel you should be alright with a consensual situation between two fictional people, a real possibility based on the authors writing style and previous works because I feel it's triggering for you and I think it's best if I decide when you're ready for that. You wouldn't be ready in real life therefore she's not ready either". This world seems to be full of people telling other people how they're allowed to feel about their own life experiences and it makes no sense to me. They think they're keeping it to the topic of the books and Gwyn's SA but it affects real survivors because when they claim that since Gwyn suffered SA 2.5 years ago and has trauma related agoraphobia she could not possibly be ready to overcome her trauma within a reasonable timeframe before the next book, they're saying that's the rulebook for all survivors. They're saying that there could never be a situation where someone could finally battle their demons and move forward. And no one, not Peggy from Utah or a therapist with multiple degrees should ever be telling a survivor what they can or cannot accomplish, real or fictional. Until we are in Gwyn's head and have her thoughts on what SHE thinks of Az and sex, no one should be boxing her into anything. At this point, anything is possible until we're told otherwise by the author herself.

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touchtranscendslanguage · 1 year

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would you want to write the like dark au of this fic bc i’d be so down to read it

(or just anything you have to say about it on here i know writing it would be a lot of work but i’d love to hear any rambling about it)

I don't think writing it out will ever happen. I'm already spending a lot of time on TTL and as much as I love it, I have other stories partially written that I want to be able to post at some point. My grandma keeps asking me to post something she can read while she's still around to read it.

But LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT ROMAN AND REMY IN THE JANUS DIES AU!!

At first, things are okay between them after Janus dies. Well, not really but as okay as they can be. Roman's really upset. He wants someone to pay and decides that since they can't fight the unseelie that someone will be the humans that captured Janus in the first place. But those humans are being protected by other humans and it won't be easy to get to them.

King Thomas puts his foot down and says that they can't just invade Earth. That would start a war. They just have to do what they can from where they are.

Slowly, Roman's hatred grows to extend to all humans, not just the ones who captured Janus. He wants to hold them all responsible. He wants war.

That's okay, though, because King Thomas would never let that happen. Remy's upset that Roman's thinking that way but he understands that Roman is grieving in his own way.

Then King Thomas dies. Roman gets his war.

Remy begs him not to do it. He pleads and tries to bargain to no avail. He even tries to stop him from signing the papers and Roman has Remy escorted out of the room by knights.

Their relationship will never be the same.

But Remy still loves Roman (platonically) and he's still his claimed. He knows Roman better than anyone and knows all of this anger is covering up the fact that he's still hurting. He forgives but he doesn't forget.

With the war going on Remy isn't allowed to go to Earth anymore. He sneaks out of faerieland anyway and gets caught. Roman assigns guards to him whenever he leaves the royal quarters. Remy slips away from the guards.

Roman ends up confining Remy to the royal quarters. Remy pitches an absolute bitch fit about it. He doesn't get his way.

He starts inviting his faerie friends to hang out with him in the royal quarters and starts avoiding Roman. Roman gets attached to one of Remy's friends and asks him out. Remy warns him not to say yes. That Roman is unstable right now and it won't end well. They don't listen.

Roman and Remy's friend end up getting married.

As time passes the distance between Roman and Remy grows. Roman took away Remy's freedom and Remy can't not resent him for that. He started a war on humans. He doesn't listen to Remy anymore. Remy is starting to feel more and more like a neglected pet or plaything.

When Remy finds out Roman's cheating on his husband and Remy Remy loses it. He screams at Roman which Roman ignores until Remy tells him that Janus would be so disappointed in him.

Roman punches Remy knocking him to the floor and giving him a black eye. How dare Remy tell him what his brother would think when Remy is just a disgusting human half-breed! He has no right to talk about Roman's family! And he better not tell Roman's husband about him cheating because that would be considered treason and Remy wouldn't like the consequences!

Logan and Patton are there. They see it happen. When Remy looks to them for help they say nothing. (If Remus had been there he would have said something but he's allowed home less and less)

Remy waits. He waits until Roman brings someone else home, then he gets Roman's husband and shows him. The king consort is devastated. Remy talks him out of forgiving Roman and giving him another chance. They both pack their bare necessities and run away together.

The king consort's magic is able to hide them both from Roman finding them magically. On Earth, Remy teaches him to blend in and eventually they go their separate ways.

That's all I feel like writing right now, but I might wright about what happened to Remy after that later.

#bluewic answers #ttl janus dies au #anon

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bl-sensei · 1 year

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Crowley can’t stand loneliness

We all know Aziraphale has religious trauma which makes him go back to Heaven even after everything it did to him, but also because he doesn't know everything it did to him. Crowley knows how important Heaven is to Az and doesn't want to hurt him, therefore he hides things from him, like his death sentence. Crowley, as far as we know, never told Aziraphale what had happened, that he didn't have even a single chance to defend himself, that, unlike Crowley, he hadn't had a trial, that Gabriel had just told him to "shut [his] stupid mouth and die already".

We can see this very clearly when we compare s2 ep2 & 3. I don't think Crowley already loved Aziraphale in 2200 BC and one of the reason is that he is more honest with Aziraphale, directly telling him that God kills children just for a bet with Satan. Meanwhile, in 1827 he tries to explain to Aziraphle that sometimes people don't have a choice but to do the "bad" thing by using a comparison of people living in castles and on the street. That's a huge difference ! Instead, it's Mr. Dalrymple who has to teach him that by hitting him with the harsh reality : if he doesn't do that people will die.

The comparison with Maggie(Crowley)/Nina(Aziraphale) shows this well. Maggie never pointed out the toxic relationship that Nina had with Lindsay even though she knew about it. The relationship completely ended on a break up, but what if Lindsay had come back ? What if they had told Nina they forgave her and that they could try to be better people together ? What if they had asked her to get back together ? Wouldn't have Nina said yes ? Well Aziraphale did. Because nobody had told any of them about the toxicity of their relationship, and when Crowley did it was already too late, Heaven had already asked Aziraphale.

This whole problem comes from the fact that Crowley doesn't want to hurt Arziraphale, but also, more importantly, he doesn’t want to fight with him. He is actually a “people pleaser” with Aziraphale because he's all he has, and he can't loose him because he can’t be alone again (s2 ep2 & Nina). Crowley doesn't dare to be too insistent or openly express his hatred towards Heaven to not be on bad terms with Aziraphale. Therefore Crowley never told Aziraphale how Heaven's behaviour affected him, like the death sentence which, as we can see in s2, really did. So it creates a gap between the two of them : Crowley hates Heaven but Aziraphale doesn't know why, and Aziraphale still clings to Heaven but Crowley doesn't understand why.

What’s worse is that Aziraphale is completely oblivious to this, so he unintentionally hurts Crowley (s2 ep6). They’re love for each other is so intense that it blinds them, making they’re relationship ironically toxic.

PS : I didn't consider the 2nd Armageddon because he hadn't had time to tell him (even though he wouldn't have had anyway I think).

#good omens #crowly x aziraphale #good omens 2 spoilers #good omens 2 #crowley #ineffable husbands #go speculation

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moririki · 3 years

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⤷ MORE THAN YOU'D BARGAIN FOR

DENJI X READER -> 1.7K when it comes to a fool blinded by love, it sure hurts to have the short end of the stick

REQUEST -> ✰ CONTAINS -> angst, friends with benefits‼️, happy ending bc i'm weak like that, denji not knowing how to process emotions, very loose college!au cos i'm lazy, makima being slightly antagonised because fuck her, mentions of sex but nothing super explicit i don't think MORI'S THOUGHTS -> thinking about denji's hands. i want to learn how to animate manga panels now so i can do a csm edit. also the writing style got kinda boring im SORRY

HEARTBREAK WAS ALWAYS BOUND TO HAPPEN IN THESE SORT OF RELATIONSHIPS. anyone with a pair of eyes and ears could give a clear answer to the question "who does denji like?" and no matter how much you wanted that answer to change, it would never be you.

even when the blonde boy had been so insistent on his heart belonging to another, he still had urges. so under the influence of one too many bottles of alcohol, it was a fairly easy decision for both of you to fall into bed together. more than once. more than you'd care to admit.

being with denji was nice. he was funny, sweet at times and vulgar during the others, and you found yourself repeating a mantra of don't catch feelings for your friend during your time together. and truth be told, it was hard not to, even when you and denji had finished your business and the topic of conversation always seemed to make its way back to makima.

it left a bitter taste in your mouth when denji acted like nothing had happened between the pair of you in other settings. the bitterness turned sour when you realised that there was no reason for him to have to either, and you cursed yourself when you realised you had done the worst thing possible and gone and fallen for your friend who so clearly wouldn't like you back.

but there were times where you thought that you just might have a chance.

even though your cursed your heart for fluttering and rearing its head each time so willingly at denji's mercy, you couldn't help but take every offhand action of his as a ray of hope. with the way his hands engulfed yours to anchor himself as he thrusted into you, the way his lips left urgent kisses on your lips as you panted beneath him, the way he whispered sweet nothings into your ear as you cried out in ecstasy.

and even when you were lying next to each other in his bed, catching your breath. you would turn to look at his face sometimes, only to see him staring at you already with a look in his eyes that could only be described as wistful. but you were a fool to think that you could ever upseat makima in denji's eyes.

false hope could only get you so far.

with his breath tickling the back of your neck and his large hand rubbing patterns into your hip, this false hope really had gotten you somewhere. but all good things must come to an end. words that you dreaded to say weighed heavy on your tongue, but you dragged yourself along, lifting them just enough to feel them escape your lips before you could really stop them.

"denji, what are we?"

you felt the hand that rested on you go still, and the arm that was poised as a pillow for you went rigid. hell, the boy that was holding you so close to his chest had practically stopped breathing, and you felt your eyelids slide shut in a bitter defeat before you heard another word. it's not like you needed them to understand how he felt, anyway.

"we're friends, aren't we?" his tone was so controlled, so even and level and unlike the denji that you knew and, dare you say it, loved. it sent another shot tubneling straight through your heart, and you were glad that you were currently facing away from him. you wouldn't be able to handle seeing the look on his face as all of your tentative hopes were crushed under his heel. all you wanted to do was curl in on yourself and maybe try to cry away the numbness that was invading your body from the chest outward.

you raised a shaking hand to push denji's own off of you, and you felt the mattress underneath you creak as the boy shifted in confusion at your behaviour.

"y/n?"

your kept your back turned to him as you got out of his bed, pulling on your own clothed and scowling in frustration when you couldn't find your shirt anywhere. you were seconds away from letting the first droplets fall, and you did not want to let denji see.

you snagged some random material of a shirt off of the bedroom floor, yanking it over your head and turning to face denji with a face that you hoped wasn't too scrunched from holding back your tears.

"we're not just friends and you fucking know it."

you didn't have time to register his wounded facial expression or the pleading calls of your name that he cast towards your retreating figure, but you grabbed your shoes before leaving his dorm, shutting the door behind you a little too forcefully and storming off back to your own room.

you must look insane, padding along the halls with no shoes as angry tears streaked down your face and you tried your best not to audibly sob. by the time you had made it back to your room your eyes were streaming, and you flopped on your bed with little regard for anything else other than crying your eyes out.

truth be told, after that fateful night and the best cry of your life you felt much better. you knew where you stood, you had your feelings sorted out, and you knew that a little distance would really help you to finally move on from your friend.

now, if only denji would stop calling and texting you like nothing had happened.

you felt like you could scream when you saw a notification from him, asking if you wanted to study for the test that you had next week. you bit back the petty urge to ask him if he wanted to study with you as just friends, instead opting to turn your phone off and bury your face in your pillow once again.

matters of the heart take time, after all.

on denji's end, things weren't looking much better. he brushed off his confusion at your actions and words when you had left so abruptly the other day, only to find himself staring at his ceiling trying to decipher his feelings and what the hell you had meant.

he likes makima. and he has, for a while now. he could count on one hand the amount of times he had interacted with the girl who sat in front of him in the lecture hall, and every time had been met with this strange giddy feeling in his chest. though it was rare, he knew that feeling.

but the one he felt right now was so, so, different. when the door clicked shut behind you, it felt like a piece of him had up and left along with you. the very reason that he had accelerated things so far in your relationship was because of how right things felt with you. the slightest graze of your fingertips across his chest didn't light any fireworks in his mind, but it's like warmth perforated his skin and was injected straight into him from you.

truth be told, that feeling was the most addicting he had ever felt. and when he heard that air of finality right after the door shut behind you, it didn't take long for denji to realise just how cold everything felt without you.

but he still liked makima, right?

that giddy feeling in his chest he got from her was enough to fill the you-shaped hole, right?

you not talking to him wasn't what made his heart hurt, right?

he only realised just how wrong he had it when he talked to makima for the fourth time ever. she had turned in her seat, even smiling at him and asking for a pen, and all that came to mind was how much he missed your smile.

hell, he missed everything. the sound of your laugh, the smell of your hair. the way you fit against him and said his name. and that's when he realised this you-related feeling was.

longing.

there was a knock on your door. and another. you groaned, rolling over to check the time to see that it was three in the morning.

by the time you had cracked your door open you saw a flash of blond hair and a face all-too-familiar, you knew it was too late to slam your door shut. denji's face perked up, and you already knew that you were done for.

he lifted his hand, revealing a pretty albeit crumpled bouquet of flowers. you almost giggled to yourself, guessing that the mastermind of that romantic gesture was most likely denji's roommate aki. but it was appreciated, nonetheless.

"what do you want, denji?" you were painfully aware of just how much of a mess you looked right now- eyes still red around the rim from how many self-pitying tears you had shed over this entire situation.

denji's mouth and opened and closed, and you sighed against your barely open door which still had a chain on it.

"i'm not in the mood, denji."

"no, no, it's just that i wanted to say that i've finally figured out what we are." it appears tgat your friend finally found his voice. you looked him in the eye again, trying not to let the hope in your heart build itself too high. "we're way more than friends, y/n."

you felt any resistance crumble at those words, and the sheepish smile on your face grew.

"so, can i come in?" you smiled at denji, shutting your door to undo the latch before opening it again, wide enough to let him back in to your life. consider him a weakness of yours.

the first thing denji did when he crossed the threshold of your door was wrap his arms around you, dried tears and crumpled flowers and all, and bury his face in your hair. the only words he had to offer was a mumbled i miss you into your skin, and you felt your body melt against him like it had so many times before.

when you finally broke apart, you couldn't help but wonder.

"so, what are the flowers for denji?" the boy before you blushed, his eyes flitting off to the side. he raised a hand to the back of his neck, taking a breath to summon some courage.

"i was hoping... that i could take you out on a date. or be your boyfriend. something like that."

"what?" denji was still bright red, though his eyes were locked onto yours.

"you heard me." you smiled once again, taking a step forwards and effectively closing the distance between you two.

"i would love to."

take a look at the menu - ,, ⚖️ ·˚ ༘ ꒱

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btsxmalereaders · 4 years

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Valentine's Special Prompt Game ♡

Pairing: Lee Minho x Male Reader

Prompt: Blind date/ set up by friends

Genre: Fluff

Also expect some harry potter pickup lines bc I love hp

☆ Requested

Word Count: 1,4k

24022021

Masterlist.

"We have to do something," Jeongin says. "Because they're really getting on my nerves, and I'm pretty sure they won't do anything on their own."

It was odd, but your friends were talking to the high school athletes as they nod in agreement, since it was no secret you and Basketball's School Team's Captain had something between hands, but didn't have the guts to properly admit it.

"Well, we have noticed that Minho has tried to get close and talk to him, but right when he's about to do it he chickens out." Changbin admits, to which everyone in their small group nods. "Maybe because he never gets the chance to see him alone in the halls in between classes."

"And in the classes they share, ____ leaves as soon as they're over, so there's no opportunity for them to talk." Chan contributes to the conversation.

A silence sets between them and they take that time to look around, making sure you or Minho aren't near.

"I know Minho hyung really wants to ask him out, but as we said, he gets really nervous and it's probably because he wants to do that privately." Felix sighs and scratches the back of his neck. "I'm thinking of... making them casually bump into each other on an empty room?"

"How is that gonna happen?" Changbin protests, thinking that is a difficult task. "And where? Were you thinking of shoving them inside the janitor's closet?"

Everyone looks at him as if he just had the best idea ever.

"Seriously?"

"Do you have something better in mind, then?"

His silence as an answer makes them be decided about it.

"Alright, let's figure out how are we going to do this!"

The bell rings throughout the institute, causing many students to come in and out of classrooms, walking briskly through the hallways after searching their lockers for their belongings. Fortunately you have a free period, so you quickly find your friends on the first floor, who appear to be waiting for your arrival.

"Cafeteria? I'm starving." Jisung asks, and everyone agreeing with his premise head to the place, exchanging a few words about upcoming classes and confirming your study session on this week.

Just as you take a seat on a free bench, Seungmin gasps, as if he just remembered something.

"Oh no, I just remembered I have to make small corrections to the model of my science project."

You look at him with curiosity. Seungmin wasn't really someone who would forget something so important like that, and he didn't look as worried as you think he'd be.

"____, could you do me a huge favor? I left the model on the janitor's closet since it was big and it wouldn't fit on my locker. Also, I didn't want to carry it all day." He explains as he grabs some books out of his backpack, along with his supplies. "I'll treat you with something from the cafeteria in exchange!"

"Uh, yes, of course. In which one you left it? Second floor?"

Seungmin nods with a smile and thanks you as you stand up and walk back to the hallway, not really thinking about how come that could happen to him.

Putting that aside momentarily, you find yourself walking nonchalantly into the closet and once you're inside, start looking for your friend's assignment on the shelves.

A few seconds later, the door opens unexpectedly, revealing the figure of Minho in the door frame. Changbin behind him, looking anxious.

"Are you sure the basketballs are in here?" He asks to his friend without talking his eyes off you, apparently nervous.

"Yes, the coach said there are behind that-" And before he can finish that sentence, he is pushing Minho inside the closet and closing the door behind him.

He almost bumps into you, but manages to hold on to one of the ledges, almost falling to the ground on the spot.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" You ask as you help him to stand up and quickly making sure he isn't hurt.

"Yeah, don't worry. I'm fine." He answers in embarrassment. His ears and face turning red in a second. "I'm sorry, my friends are jerks."

You chuckle, nervously turning around to continue looking for Seungmin's model and hearing Minho is trying to open the door. But of course it's closed from outside.

Immediately you know it's a set up.

Minho curses under his breath and takes his phone out of his pocket when he receives a text message from the group chat with his friends.

Ask him out and we'll open the door ;)

"You have to be kidding me." He mutters and turns around to see the confused expression on your face. He could lie to his friends and say he did it, right? And then this would be just an awkward experience that eventually you'd forget. Probably.

But he now thinks it's stupid but genius at the same time. His friends knew he was nervous to ask you out or even say a word to you, but now you are alone. It was a closet, yes, maybe not the ideal circumstances, but it was private, by all odds.

"-locked it?" You ask, bringing him back to earth. "Is the door closed? We should call someone."

Minho smiles and eyes his phone screen one more time. "Actually, my friends will open it. Soon. They just want me to- ask you..." He sighs, and you look even more confused than before.

With the nervousness making his hands slightly tremble and hia heartbeat increasing, he manages to build up the courage he needs to keep talking. "Look, they just thought it would be a great idea to shove us inside here so I could, uhm, ask you out."

He says that last part rapidly and, but you understand, making you also get blushed and nervous.

You don't say a word for a moment, so he speaks up again.

"I'm sorry, this was obviously dumb. You don't have to-"

"For real?" You ask, still trying to figure out is this was a terrible prank from them. It's not like he had done something like that before. He was, along with his friends, actually very well-behaved and charismatic, despite the stereotypical things said about athletes in the institute. You wouldn't like him if he were like that.

"Yeah, I've liked you for a while now, actually."

No stutter on his words and his eyes fixed on whatever inside that closet but your eyes; his cheeks red and that subtle biting of his lower lip melting your heart. So those gaze exchanging in your classes and whenever you ran into him in the hallways or on the gym weren't a product of your imagination. Minho was really looking at you the same way you did look at him all this time.

"I'd love to." You answer. "Go out with you, I mean."

His eyes dazzle with happiness, finally daring to look at you and getting closer. Not knowing what else to do or say, he sloppily hands you his phone.

"Let's exchange numbers?"

You smile, taking your phone and handing it to him and grabbing his, saving your number with trembling hands and typing your name with a smiley face next to it. He gives you back the device to see he had registered his name with a heart next to it.

"Great. Thanks, I'll message you soon."

"I'll take your word, then." You smile at him, visibly more relaxed, but still going through a roller-coaster of emotions inside.

Minho sends a quick text and a minute later Changbin comes back to open the door with a huge smile on his face.

"I'll see you around, ____." He says with a smile and before he exits the room, he gets closer to leave a small kiss on your cheek, almost running afterwards and making you laugh. You also hear Changbin's screams to tease him.

Later in that day you receive that long awaited message from him, saying he will be taking you this weekend to a thematic coffee shop of a book saga he knew you liked along with a cute pick up line referring to it.

Did you survive the Avada Kedavra curse? Because you’re drop dead gorgeous ;)

Lol, of course I did look up for Harry Potter pickup lines

But that's okay because

I might as well be under the Imperius curse, because I’d do anything for you.

#kpop x male reader #stray kids x male reader #skz x male reader #lee know x reader #kpop x reader #stray kids x m!reader #fluff #drabbles #kpop imagines #stray kids x reader #lee know

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maysbanks · 4 years

Text

she moves in her own way. (jj maybank)

due to the ASTOUNDING response to my first jj fic which i have to say a huuuge thank you to everyone that liked, commented & reblogged, it honestly means the absolute world !! i couldn't wait much longer to start writing for my boy again, i have so many fic ideas and cannot wait to get them out to y'all. this one is shorter than the last, & the title is inspired from the song 'she moves in her own way' by the kooks (lol) but isn't necessarily based off of it, it's just something that i wrote up quickly bc i was in my feels™️ . also i feel very unoriginal with the whole plot and aspect of this but im gonna post it anyway bc i love jj lmao. anyway hope u enjoy !

warnings: swearing, underage drinking, drug use, violence, jj with a gun™️

summary: reader walks the fine line between either pogue or kook, though technically a kook, she ignores all social standings of the obx and jj maybank cannot stop himself from getting caught up in her whirlwind.

( gif isn’t mine! please let me know if it’s yours so i can credit you. )

Everyone seemed to have a different perspective of you, unsurprisingly. You weren't really much of a social butterfly, you kept yourself to yourself, really. Nobody in the Outer Banks knew much about you at all, other than what they had come up with in their heads. And while you tried your best to stay in the shadows, that only seemed to make you stand out more.

You were known for being the best of both worlds - not really a Pogue, but not really a Kook either. While your social status and family wealth suggested you to be a Kook, your free spirit and reckless behaviour fitted you better towards the Pogue style. If anyone were to ask you, you told them you were neither.

Why should a name define you anyway? You thought it was all bullshit, the stupid territorial arguments and the snide comments from both sides. You thought it was ridiculous, you weren't living in The Outsiders, for fuck sake.

You moved in your own way, simple as that. You wouldn't let anyone tell you what to do, where you can't or shouldn't be, it was a free country you'd say, middle finger salute ready to aim towards anyone who dared cross you. You were an enigma, wild and careless, unforgiving and unforgettable. You didn't necessarily like the attention, but you got it. And you knew it, and you played on it, too.

You had used your irresistible charm more than enough times to bail JJ Maybank out of trouble, despite your parents' protest. They didn't have a problem with the Pogues, persay, how could they when your dad been one half of his life before meeting your mom and marrying into the rich lifestyle; they just had a problem with JJ, as many of the parents on the island did. He was an unstoppable force to be reckoned with, weed smoking, knuckles constantly torn, skin bruised, quick wit, sarcastic humour, daddy issues, you know the type. Kids loved him, parents hated him.

You were friends with JJ, you supposed. You spent your time with him talking about your days and smoking a joint, meaningful conversations turning into joking and general tomfoolery within seconds. With JJ, you were simply unapologetically you, and JJ never judged you. He never made you choose a side, seemingly content with the fact that you were a little bit of everything, though there was times when he teased you relentlessly about the Kook life, but that was just JJ.

And despite the social differences, him being a Pogue through and through, you technically a Kook, you were drawn to each other pretty easily. Not that you hung out all the time, but you loved every second when you did, usually joined by his group of best friends - John B, Pope, and Kiara. With Kiara a Kook herself but drawn more to the lifestyle of the Pogue's, she understood you more than anyone. You'd bonded a lot, and with each of them too.

JJ loved that you fitted in with them, like a missing puzzle piece. So perfectly, it shook him to its core. The pair of you were close, but he had no idea where he stood with you, like most people never when it came to you. You were like a rollercoaster, taking people for the most exciting ride of their lives that lasted a full three or so minutes before they returned back to solid ground. You'd given JJ a ride a number of times on your non-existent metaphorical rollercoaster, and he'd returned for another ride time and time again. You couldn't say no to that damned boy.

It was a blessing and a curse, the unspoken relationship you shared. A blessing because JJ was the best thing that happened to you, and a curse because that was your downfall. You never got attached to people, never given yourself the chance. But then JJ Maybank had come along, blonde hair and blue eyes, split lip and sharpened teeth, words cunning. You saw him as a challenge at first, the name Kook Princess haunting you as he spoke them, stood in front of you at the keg upon your first real meeting. He'd held a drink out towards you, smirk perfect on his pink lips.

You'd attended over a hundred kegger's in your lifetime, the Pogue parties more inviting than those of the Kook's. You danced and talked to anyone that came across your path, whether it be unknowing Tourons, unjudging Pogues, or unforgiving Kooks, you drew them all in. You didn't fit in with any of them, JJ had realised. You really did move in your own way, he thought. He liked that, he'd decided. And hey, you were pretty cute too.

On that particular night, he'd spoken to you directly for the first time in a long time. "Would the Kook Princess like a drink?" He'd asked, holding the red cup out towards you. You'd eyed the offended object, and subsequently him, too. He smirked at the attention. You had rolled your eyes.

"Don't call me that," you'd said simply, but taking the cup from his hands regardless. You took a sip, relieved to discover that he hadn't tampered with it in any way. You were still considered a Kook to most people, after all. You could never be too careful. "Thanks, Maybank."

And he'd blinked at you, lips suddenly raising to a sly smile as he shrugged, dimples winking at you as they appeared in his cheeks. "Anytime," and he'd spoken your name back to you and you couldn't get enough of the way it sounded coming from his mouth, and you realised hey, this guy is pretty cute, and the rest, as they, is history.

You were in the midst of another infamous Pogue kegger at the current, months after your first introduction to JJ Maybank and his friends, and you stood off to the side, listening to JJ intently as he ranted about the events of the day he'd endured. Starting from finding a Grady White sunken in the marsh, "A fucking Grady Marsh, they're like 500 G's man!", to discovering that the boat belonged to Scooter Grubbs, who had coincidentally been found dead that same day, to getting chased by two guys with a gun, to the finding of the motel key from the wreck and breaking in that same motel room, finding a safe full of money and a gun of all things, to their best attempt at laying low which, unsurprisingly, resulted in the kegger in the first place.

JJ was wild in his recite of the events, hands gesturing every which way as you watched him with your lips curled into your mouth, resisting a smile at his antics. When he finished he retelling, you raised an eyebrow and chuckled dryly. "So, complete and utter boring day for you, huh?"

JJ chuckled along with you, shaking his head as if he was still in disbelief from everything that had happened in the past twenty four hours. "Man, it was crazy," he muttered. He looked at you then, eyes sincere. "I wish you were there with us. It was like something straight from a movie, I'm telling you. I feel like such a badass with that gun."

Your secret joy at his confession of that he wished you were was short lived, as the last of his words sunk in and you felt dread build in the pit of your stomach. You stared at him, him so excited that he hadn't even realised your face had dropped, before you reached out and grabbed his arm, effectively halting his movements and stopping the hurried flow of words that were leaving his mouth.

"JJ," you said carefully, eyes trained on his as he stared, clueless. "Please tell me you did not take that gun from the safe."

Your heart dropped as you saw him falter, his lips helplessly moving but no words coming out. He held a hand up, as if to hush you, though you hadn't started to speak again, and then his hand had dropped just as quick as it was raised, his teeth biting down on his chapped lip as the realisation dawned on you.

"JJ Fucking Maybank," you spat, hands slapping gently at his arms, because you could never really hurt him, you just wanted him to know you were pissed. "Do you realise how fucking careless that is? How much trouble you could get into, if anyone knew you had a gun-" your voice trailed off, your eyes closing as you exhaled. "JJ, please tell me you don't have it on you right now."

His lack of reply was the only answer you needed, and your stomach churned as you stepped back from his figure, suddenly feeling sick. He followed you, though, not letting you get too far as he took your arms in his hands and tried to drag you closer to him once more. You shook your head, arms slipping from his hold as you glared at him fiercely.

"That's so fucking stupid, JJ. You could get into serious trouble with this, trouble I won't be able to get you out of." You warned, because you knew it was true. Your charm and looks could get him out of some trouble to its extent, but it was more so your parents wealth and status that got the both of you out of shit when you managed to get into it, and you also knew your parents would literally throw a fit if you got involved in something like this - carrying a gun was no joking matter. You stepped back once more, hand finding its way to your forehead. "And from a crime scene, no less. Fucking hell."

JJ licked his lips, standing back roughly as you watched, his jaw clenching. "Well I'm not asking for your help here, Princess," he taunted, the nickname sending a wave of annoyance through you. JJ knew it would. "It's not like I ask you to help me, you're just there. Thinking I need help, like I'm some fucking charity case, a fucking doll you picked up from the thrift store that was gonna be thrown out the next day."

You tried to protest, but JJ didn't give you the chance. "I don't need your help all the fucking time. I don't need your pity. I get that you won't understand because why would you? You're a Kook, you get everything you want handed to you on a silver platter. And you can argue and fight me about it all you want, but I know you know it's true."

He sighed heavily, hands running down his face in a sign of defeat. You watched him all the while, thankful that you had ventured off the outskirts of the party so that hopefully nobody had heard JJ shouting at you, your heart wrenching as his blue eyes settled on you. "I'm sorry, JJ," you said finally. You refused to cry, though the desire to at the sight of him being so mad at you tore you apart. "I'm just trying to look out for you. With the gun thing, with everything that I help you with. And I know I'm a Kook, and I know that my parents could afford to buy half of this fucking island if they pleased, but that doesn't define me. I care, okay? And I know I care a lot more than a lot of people in your life."

It was probably a low blow, and you knew it. But JJ took it in, let the words sink into his brain where they stayed there, his fists clenching at his sides. You crossed your arms over your chest, defeated.

"I'm gonna go back to the party," you whispered. "I'll see you around, I guess." You eyed his pockets, unsure of where exactly he held the gun. "Be careful, okay."

And even when you were angry with him, you still tried to make sure he was okay, that he stayed safe. There was multiple occasions you'd showed up unannounced, simply asking how his day was, if he okay, if he had eaten that day, stayed hydrated. At first the attention startled him, he'd never really had anyone look out for him in that aspect, and yet there you were, like an angel sent from the gods themselves, smiling down at him.

You cared, he realised. You cared so much that sometimes he couldn't take it, because he didn't know how. The most family he'd ever gotten close to having in his life was the Pogues, after losing his mother and subsequently losing his father too as he turned into the monster that he was, cold and distant, fists always poised ready for an imaginary fight, and he knew that someday the Pogues would even slip through his fingers. He couldn't let that happen with you. He wouldn't.

He'd started off in your direction, truly, he had. But then John B was grabbing him and averting his attention to him, and he focused on his friend, promising only a minute of his time. You were in his sights, stood a bit away, and he recognised the couple you were talking to as Sarah Cameron and Topper Thorton, Kooks through and through. He held his distaste back, and even held a drink out to offer to Sarah as she and Topper made their way past where he and John B were standing. Big fucking mistake, he realised quickly.

It had all happened in a blur of events, each little bit leading to big finale - as he watched his best friend being held down in the water, powerless to Topper who kneeled over him, hands forcing John B to stay put in the sea. Sarah was screaming at Topper, Pope was holding JJ back with all his might, Kie beside them as she screamed along with Sarah to let John B go. And there you were, suddenly beside JJ, gripping his arm tightly as you took in the sight with a horrified glare. JJ didn't even hesitate; the gun had been pulled from his shorts and was directed at Topper's head in the blink of an eye.

The fury in his veins was red hot and ugly, tearing through every part of him like a vice. This was the Pogues land, their side of the island, and yet the Kooks still thought they could get away with anything and everything - including, apparently, attempting to drown his best friend.

"Your move, broski," JJ uttered through clenched teeth. He could hear the screams of the crowd behind him, and he pulled the gun away from Topper's head and into the direction of the sky, firing two shots towards it as the crowd of people quickly dispersed, screeches sounding from all over. "Now everybody needs to get the fuck off our side of the island!"

He was shoved to the side as Sarah rushed to her boyfriend, telling him he was fucking crazy or something like that, he wasn't really listening. The shots rang in his ears, and the adrenaline of the moment soured through him. Kie and Pope were screaming at him, he could hear their voices distantly. His blue eyes were unfocused for a second, before they looked up, and there you were.

Sent from the gods themselves, once again. You looked vibrant, so insanely alive, lips red and cheeks flushed, eyes bright. You let out a shaky breath as you watched him. JJ clenched his jaw.

"He was going to drown John B," he thought he'd said, but he wasn't sure. He didn't really know what to keep track of at that moment, Kie and Pope's obvious disapproval at him literally doing the one thing they swore not to do, Sarah and Topper stumbling away from the scene in the distance, John B getting up and muttering something along the lines of he wasn't going to drown me, or you, simply staring at him.

Before he knew what he was doing, JJ had made his way towards you. The gun was still held in his hands, and you swallowed thickly as you eyed it. "You should put that away," you muttered. JJ seemed confused, before he caught on to what you meant and he shoved the gun back to the spot of in between his shorts and his hip. "You literally did the one thing I said not to, you tool."

JJ cracked a smile, small and uncertain as he gazed at you. You stepped closer to him, eyes glancing over his shoulder. "You really pissed them off," you said, meaning his friends.

JJ shrugged, because he didn't care about their opinion, he cared about yours. And if you hated him now, hated the fact that he was just some dirty Pogue who held guns against people's heads now, apparently. "I don't care about what they think," he spoke softly. You looked at him confused. "I care about what you think."

You smiled softly, shrugging one shoulder. "Topper was going to drown John B," you replied, matter of fact. "If you hadn't stepped in when you did, who knew what could have happened. Nothing could have stopped him." You bit your lip, hand reaching out and touching his face gently, thumb soothing over the worried line between his brows. "You did the right thing, J. A fucking crazy and stupid thing, potientally dangerous, but the right thing nonetheless."

"Yeah, that's kind of my go-to, if you haven't already noticed," JJ smiled, tongue running over his bottom lip. You rolled your eyes, though playful. "Look, I'm sorry about before, okay. I was a dick. I know you care, but sometimes that's what scares me."

Your eyebrows furrowed, a confused expression on your face as your hand dropped from his face to intertwine with his own hand, his gaze suddenly becoming fixed on your linked hands, his other absentmindedly playing with your fingers that held his hand.

"It's like, you're this untouchable thing. I mean, you don't belong to anyone, you refuse to go by anything other than your name, and you're like this perfect mix between Pogue and Kook even if you do hate it and everyone knows who are you and they make these stories up about you, like that's how popular you are," JJ chuckled. "And then you hang out with me, you look past all the dirty Pogue shit, see me for who I am, and you care. And you care so god dammed much that it fucking terrifies me because nobody's ever cared that much before about me, so why should you?"

His hand left yours to remove the hat from sitting atop his hair and then run his hand through the blonde locks. You could see his tongue running along the outsides of his bottom teeth, the action causing a bump beneath his skin. He looked nervous than you had ever seen him before, and you'd both gotten into enough nerve-wracking situations together to compare. You sighed as your hands reached for his face, gripping his cheeks and forcing his eyes to gaze down at yours.

"JJ Maybank," you started, grinning softly. "You listen to me while I tell you that you deserve the fucking world and more. All this shit that you're going through, all the crap you deal with on a daily basis, you carry it so well that nobody would even know. You fight through each day and I don't even know how you manage it half the time. I admire you so much, J. And I can't help but care about you, even if you don't want me to. I care about you so much, that you wanna know a secret? It scares me too."

JJ gazed down at you lovingly, his forehead moving to rest against yours. You welcomed the embrace, his arms wrapping around your waist and squeezing you gently, as if reassuring himself that you were actually there.

"JJ," you whispered as you were stood in silence for a precise minute, neither of you daring to break the silence until you had. His blue eyes stared into yours, awaiting the next part of your speech. You swallowed your nerves down, figuring fuck it. "I'm so in love with you."

He grinned, his head swooping down before you knew it and his lips pressing against yours in a heated embrace that sent a sensation of butterflies to fly wildly in your stomach, bashing against your ribcage and taking your breath away. Shivers flew up your spine, and every hair on your body stood on edge as the kiss grew heavier, tongues brushing and teeth clattering, bodies pressed against each other as much as they could manage.

When JJ's lips left yours, you almost whined. JJ grinned cheekily, hands digging into your hips. "I love you," he breathed against the skin of your neck as he buried his head there, lips tickling the flesh. "I can't believe you just macked on me while I have a gun in my pocket."

You rolled your eyes and tugged gently on his hair, spurring a laugh from him as you shoved him away and grinned despite yourself. "Do not remind me, please," you warned him, allowing him to pull you into his side as you made your way down the beach. "I still can't believe you took that thing."

"I knew it'd come in handy though," he grinned, pulling you closer with the arm thrown over your shoulder. You wrapped yours around his waist, face squished in his chest as you shook your head.

"You're an idiot, Maybank."

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tartagliaxx · 3 years

Note

hm, personally i don't think kaeya's loyalty lie completely within mondstadt? like, it's not to say that he would immediately destroy it once he had the chance, i actually think he'd rather avoid it, but i do think that if his end goal means tearing mondstadt down, i don't think he would hesitate on that? maybe i'm just a sucker for villain characters lololol

i just think that, as you said, if he didn't trust diluc, he wouldn't have told diluc at that time. but he did, and how did that turn out? he lost the trust of arguably his closest friend considering they were sworn brothers. i don't think kaeya trusts anyone? like, not on the level of trust he once had with diluc anyways. that's why he's always so secretive ig, he saw what happened when he told diluc everything, and that ultimately drove the two of them apart. he keeps this secret to himself because he's afraid that if he trusts anyone else and they learn of who he is, they'll leave him.

and doesn't mona have a voiceline about kaeya? it's quite interesting honestly, he's literally one of my favourite characters if not my favourite, based on just lore.

and thank you 🥖 nonnie! i hope i don't get my behind handed back to me is all lololol

— r. anon

all very perfectly great points that make me want to burst out in tears but id rather not see bc my heart cannot take kaeya angst. i mean... he’s my first boy 😭😭 if he goes down, i will go down with him i swear. i say as i nervously glance at my kaeya angst wips

spoilers and ooc stuff utc!

on a deeper note, i don’t think kaeya is loyal to mondstadt. i think kaeya is loyal to the memory of crepus who valued mondstadt more than a lot of things. i know that kaeya had a lot of respect for the man and dare i say, he loved him as a father, more than his biological one that seemed to be absent and irrelevant in his mind. telling diluc abt his origins was not just an act of trust between brothers, its an act of contrition from a man who is burdened by the guilt of his secrets and hidden happiness when mondstadt lost one of its greatest protectors. i think kaeya sought out the part of crepus that was still alive in diluc, hoping that coming clean will relieve him of his guilt, that the man he looked up to will still see him as a son despite everything he could and would have done. but the thing is diluc wasn’t crepus and that ultimately broke them apart. now as you said, kaeya keeps a safe distance away from everyone. sure he has friends and acquaintances but they will never know him like he allowed diluc to. i think subconsciously, diluc turning away made him think he was unworthy of what he dreamt of and is now perfectly content with just playing beneath the shadows.

now how does that apply to the ask you sent aside from being a reason for me to ramble pointlessly about personal hcs? well, in my blind eyes, i see the concept of sin and contrition very fitting for kaeya. he wants to pay back his dues silently bc the only person who would have listened to him was dead and his alternative left him in the dust. the concept is similar to the act of confessing to a priest as an act of penance in some religions. through dubious methodology, he protects mondstadt because that was what crepus wanted (ngl his method of protecting mondstadt was also dubious so... like father like son ig) and he wanted to clear his name by honoring he who took him in without any hint of doubt assumingly.

here’s how mona’s line comes in. mona tells the traveler smth along the lines of ‘he thought he has come clean from his past but eventually, it will come back to bite his ass’. for the most part, he succeeded in clearing his name. he sees himself as a free man who has decided to protect mondstadt that welcomed him with open arms. his loyalty is with them. he chose mondstadt. but sometimes, you’re never given a choice and if smth khaenri’ah related comes back, he might be dragged into the mess all over again and he’ll be as powerless as he was when he was just a kid except this time, no one’s offering him a hand. kaeya’s loyalty lies with mondstadt but loyalty does not equal power and he might not be strong enough to protect it. in fact, he might be the one to destroy it. does he want to? no, i dont think so. i think that’s the last thing on his mind. does he have a choice? against khaenri’ah? no, i don’t think so either.

ugh no wonder i wrote 3k worth of brainrot abt diluc and kaeya. i just cant shut up abt them for the life of me. lowkey became a part two of my fic and also lowkey botched up kaeya but hey! this is how he lived in my head and its what makes me love him so.. 🤡

#lei.answers #withlove.r #im so sorry for this #i typed it while i was delirious #and when i re-read it a big chunk of it sounds like bs

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anothermrvictormoron · 4 years

Text

Hello guys! I just figured out something during quarantine and thought "Why not posting it?". Here is my first headcon about the boys of the anime game play "Mr Love Queen's Choice" . I hope that u're enjoying it as much as I did while writing it! Requests are welcome so please let me know what u want to read at my page in the future ! Stay healthy!!

Their reactions when they find out that MC is smoking

Victor:

+ Oh hell no trouble is incoming

+ Definitely recognise it pretty fast *he recognises the slightest change of your behaviour, movements, gaze and even your smell so don't even try to hide it*

+ Would be very furious bc he wouldn't let u harm ur body in any way

+ Worries about u althought he wouldn't admit it

+ "How can you be so dumb and risk your life like that? I won't accept that."

+ Lecturing u all day and night about what you're doing to your body *he's doing it bc he really cares for you and loves you so don't be too mad*

+ Begging for him to stop his lectures won't help u

+ Will find all cigarettes you're trying to hide from him

+ Will find even the hardest hideouts

+ Seeing the doctor will be part of ur day

+ He'll make sure that u're going to that appointment

+ But may god be with you when he finds u smoking a cigarette

+ Would probably slap the cigarette out of your hand and crush it under his feet

+ Run.

+ He wouldn't give u any cash for cigarettes

+ "I'm not funding ur addiction, moron."

+ Would even change his pin if u're even thinking of stealing his black card

+ Would force u to go to one of the best and most expensive detoxification clinic he can find *if necessary*

+ When he's at work he would call u more often to make sure that u're not smoking

+ Would even force Goldman to spy on u when u have ur break *he doesn't get paid enough for this*

+ U would recognise it pretty fast bc Goldman isn't the type for such things *still doesn't get enough paid for this*

+ "Victor why was Goldman's car quickly driving off when I got out of the building to have my break?"

+ "Dummy, otherwise i would worry. I can't always be by our side to stop ur shenanigans."

Gavin:

+ He would recognise it from the start

+ It's hopeless to hide or deny it *birdcop knows everything*

+"You know what you're doing to you body, right?"

+ Would try really hard to convince u to stop smoking

+ Getting upset and nervous when he sees u smoking one of this health destroying things

+"What was the trigger that led u to smoking? U wanna tell me?"

+ He wouldn't have even thought for a second that a person like u could start smoking

+ "How long have you planned to keep this a secret from me?"

+ Would definitely talk with u a lot about it all day

+ Hardly trying to understand why u're smoking

+ If necessary he would force u to hand him out all your cigarettes to prevent u from any damages u could get from smoking

*beeing overprotective*

+ Trying to search something you could replace smoking with

+ He would tell Minor to keep an eye on u when he's not around *althought Minor isn't the best choice for him*

+ Minor: "Uhh okay so...what should I do when she's smoking a cigarette?"

+ "I don't know just do something."

+ When he's at work he pays a bit more attention to his phone

+ If Minor is sending him a message prepare urself for a looooonnngggg conversation when he's home

+ "Then stop her immediately! I don't care how just do something!"

+ Minor while freaking out "Okokok I'll do my best bro!"

+ Relieved a bit when Minor was successful

+ At home pulling u onto his lap while having a looonnnggg conversation

+ Confessing to u that he told Minor to keep an eye on u

+ "Pumpkin don't be mad. I just want u to be healthy."

Lucien:

+ He knows it right from the start

+ Isn't really pleased about it

+ "U wanna tell me why u've decided to smoke? Maybe I can help u."

+ Worries about your health

+ Would explain u every detail about what one cigarette could actually do to ur body while drinking a cup of ur favorite tea with you

+ Hoping that u think about quitting to smoke by telling u everything that could happen to ur body when u don't quit it *when i say EVERYTHING, I mean EVERYTHING*

+ Even scares u by telling u all these scary things he knows *if necessary*

+ Keeping an eye on u when he's around u

+ "U don't smoke a cigarette, do u?"

+ Taking it out of ur hand to crush it in an ashtray

+ Would find any hideouts with cigarettes *U're an open book to him so no chance to hide them*

+ Scary but he knows when u're smoking at work and sends u a message when u do so

+ "U're enjoying ur break?"

+ U're wondering if he did hire someone to spy on u but u couldn't figure out someone *actually he's the one observing u *

+ Feeling a bit weird by that thought

+ "Would he do something like that?"

+ U couldn't manage to hide it by ur visits at the orphanage

+ "Miss why are u smelling like smoke every time u come here? Are u smoking?"

+ "Uh...uh uhm y-yeah but please don't tell Lucien about it! He would get angry if u would tell him!"

+ The kids would at first shut their mouth about it but u think Lucien would be that naive and dumbfounded? *Haha guess what*

+ The kids are telling him what u're doing when u come here because they're royal to him and love him so much *also because he promised them to bring some candies the next time he comes to the orphanage *

+ "Silly, u think u could have hide it from me?"

Kiro:

+ Wouldn't even dare thinking of u smoking a cigarette

+ Not his beloved Miss Chips!! *protecting mode activated*

+ As he's actually seeing u smoking he can't believe his eyes *blinking several times**Kiro.exe stopped working for a moment*

+ "Miss Chips you're smoking?"

+ Would be worried sick of u and our health

+ Would do anything to provide u from smoking

+ Would even write a song about it if he feels like it

+ Asking u every day how you feel

+ Panicking a bit bc he doesn't know what he could/should do

+ "You should definitely quit smoking MC. It would be best for you."

+ You actually think about stopping to smoke just for him but it costs a lot of discipline

+ He would love to help and support you by quitting to smoke

+ Being very moody

+ Secretly throwing them into the trash can or hiding them so u're not able to smoke even a single one

+ Even hiding the ashtray and the lighters if necessary

+ "Kiro where are my cigarettes?? And even my ashtray and my lighters are gone?!!"

+ "I won't tell u! U should care about your health more!"

+ Missing ur sweet smell when he buries his face onto ur shoulder when u're hugging each other

+ Does even hate u a bit for starting to smoke *pout pout pout*

+ Would sneak off of work to surprise u at ur lunch breaks if he manages that Savin won't notice it

+ "Come on MC u don't need cigarettes in ur life...You just need me!"

+ "I just need them to calm down Kiro! They aren't as important as u!"

+ Taking u into a big embrace and actually kinda happy u said that into his face

+ Making sure u're alone as he places some ass sweet kisses onto ur lips *being a bit overwhelmed but very happy*

+ " U're also very important to me and that's why I'm doing this things...u understand that?"

100 notes · View notes

writemywaytoyourheart · 5 years

Text

Requested: no, not at all

a/n: this has been such an emotional rollercoaster for me y'all. the only reason I made this was bc I want you all to know what can happen when you leave someone behind. So if you're struggling, please talk to someone, talk to me, my asks and dms are always open. Ily

*Listen to Clouds by Before You Exit, either before or after reading this*

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x reader

Genre: angst, bits of fluff scattered about, but just pure angst if we're being honest here.

Warnings: Language, suicidal death, panic attacks, depression, lots of hurt and depressed Kookoo I'm so sorry.

Word Count: 5.7k hoo

Read at your own emotional risk. If this is triggering for you do not read it please. Go find happy fluff on my Masterlist

The smile on your face could fool anyone. It sure did fool him.

The way you danced to the music no matter where you were or who was watching, made his heart skip a beat in his chest.

You would belt out whatever song was playing, even if you didn't know all the lyrics. A ton of 'la la la's' would ensue and he couldn't control his giggles while watching you. His heart pounded in his chest everytime he heard you sing, even though you weren't the best singer in the world.

The way you would subtly tell him that you were hungry–dramatically grabbing your stomach and groaning about how your belly button was surely sucking your spine because of how empty it was down there.

Your eyes would light up when he suggested getting lunch, and 'oh yeah sure, if you're hungry' would be your nonchalant reply, although the brightness in your eyes and the skip in your step as you hurried ahead of him gave you away. His heart fluttering as he was tripping over himself to catch up to you.

The way your eyes would get bigger as you looked at the food choices, whether he took you to a restaurant or a random food stand on the sidewalk. You were so excited every time.

The day Jungkook asked you to be his girlfriend would be etched into your memory forever. You'd been friends for about a year, he trusted you with everything and would always turn to you, and he knew that you were the person that he wanted to spend his life with, maybe have a family with someday. He actually knew it the day he first laid eyes on you–you were introducing yourself to them all, and reached Jungkook last stretching your hand out to shake his and the second you touched him–a bell went off. It startled Jungkook and he whirled around trying to find where it came from. He found that it was Jimin's alarm as the older boy quickly turned it off. He never told anyone until you two were dating, you were both hopeless romantics and you squealed in delight when he told you the story. He knew then that you were his soulmate.

The day he asked you to be his was in the spring, you two were walking along a path of cherry blossom trees. It was cliché but his cute stutter and pink cheeks made it a thousand times better.

Of course you also had your bad days, everyone does. But you always tried your best to keep a smile on your face. He admired you a lot for that. But he loved you just as much when you cried for hours, lying in his arms, feeling like you wanted to give up, when you didn't know what to do anymore, though he always helped you come down from that. On the less serious days, you would rant for a bit about what had you down, then suggest a dance party, and he would happily oblige.

You two would spin around dancing and singing along to the songs until your lungs inevitably gave out or your head got too dizzy, then you'd plop on the ground in a fit of giggles. Troubles long forgotten.

At least that's what you made him believe.

Yeah, you definitely fooled him.

Now you were gone.

And he would never get the chance to ask you why.

"Hello?"

"....Kookie?" Your voice on the other line sounded weak, it was late and he was worried you might be sick.

"Hey baby, what are you doing?"

"...Kookie, I'm sorry." Your voice broke at the end, Jungkook didn't think he'd ever heard you sound so sad and tired.

"What do you mean baby? It's okay, what's going on? Talk to me."

"Jungkook, I...I lo-" Were you crying? He tried to stay calm, "Y/n? Baby, what is it?" You didn't answer so he spoke again, a little louder this time, "Y/n, please answer me love."

...

'Hyung, I think I need to go to Y/n.'

All he can remember is pale.....pale walls, pale tiled floors, your body lying limp on them, pale pills dumped on the floor next to you.

Confusion and panic.

That's all he can remember. No matter how hard he tries to forget it.

Voices shouting around him. Someone grabbing his arms when he started to fade. Jin hyung picking you up in his arms, cradling your lifeless body and hurrying out of the bathroom. Where had the light in your eyes gone? Why did they look so empty?

'She's tired...she needs to sleep.'

He kept repeating the words to Hoseok who was holding him up now. Hoseok just nodded silently and held the youngest up the best he could.

'Hyung, she's sick. She needs medicine. She needs to sleep.'

Why was no one listening to him? Why was Jimin crying? Where did Y/n and Jin hyung go? What was going on? Why was Yoongi hyung shouting into a phone?

Hoseok practically carried Jungkook to the car, pushing him in and slamming the door shut behind them.

Why wouldn't Jimin stop crying? Why was Tae pale as a ghost as he sped down the road? Why was Namjoon trying to calm everyone down? Where were Y/n, Jin, and Yoongi?

What the hell is going on??

There you were, someone was wheeling you into a white room, on a white bed, your hair splayed haphazardly around your face.

That was the night he lost you.

That night.....It will haunt him for the rest of his life.

"Shut up Kookoo!" You laugh and hit him playfully, he couldn't help but reach out and tickle your sides to get you to stop smacking his chest–causing you to shriek and flail away from him. He loved that nickname that you always called him, and he wouldn't dare let anyone else call him that.

"Why should I?" He laughed as you kept trying to get away from his tickle attack. He had just beaten you at yet another round of 'Sorry', that stupid passive-agressive board game, and he wouldn't stop teasing you for making that one dumb move.

"It was a stupid accident Kook! Just shuddup already!" You couldn't stop laughing and kicking at him, trying to knock him off of you.

Eventually he pins your arms to your sides, and lays on top of you. You try not to let a smile break as he grins down at you, then he leans down and kisses your nose softly, then both your cheeks, he rubs his nose against yours before kissing your lips, "sorry baby, I'll stop teasing you now." He leans down and starts kissing all over your face again, giggles leaving your lips at the ticklish feeling...Then he takes your hand and looks at the little silver ring on your pointer finger–he had a matching one on his–he traces it and looks for the little engraving on it, then reads it aloud, " 'forever and always', remember when you didn't want that on it?" He makes a face at you and you laugh, "it's not that I didn't want it, it just sounded cheesy at the time. But I love it." He kisses you again,

"I love you Y/n."

"Love you too Kookoo."

"What are you saying?" The confusion and fear shook Jungkook's voice as he looked back and forth between Jin and the doctor he met only hours ago. None of the other members around could meet his eyes.

"What are you s-saying?" He repeated the question when no one answered him. The sound of Tae's voice cracking and his sobs starting didn't even register in Jungkook's brain. He didn't see Jimin trying to figure out who to go to, then settling on hugging Tae as if his life depended on it, seeing as Jungkook wasn't in the state to be touched.

"Please answer me." His voice was steadier than he expected. The doctor was the only one willing to look him in the eyes, "I'm sorry...but she's gone."

"Gone where?"

"What?"

"You're confusing me, please, just." Jungkook was obviously struggling, his eyes started to burn, from confusion and the frustration of not being understood.

"Jungkook-" Jin's eyes were red as he stepped forward to take his young friend's arm, but Jungkook moved back, away from Jin's reach.

"Can I please just go see her now? She needs me." Jungkook's voice broke again and he just wanted to scream, what was the matter with everyone? Why couldn't he go to you? "She needs me...."

"Jungkook, your girlfriend, she's-"

"...what?"

"She's dead, Jungkook. I'm sorr-"

"Stop it."

"Jungkook please-" Yoongi stepped up to him now, trying to take his arm, tears streaming steadily down the usually composed elder hyung's cheeks.

"Don't lie to me."

Namjoon and Hoseok were turned away, they couldn't watch anymore, their own faces were damp with tears, their eyes red and swollen.

"Jungkook, I wouldn't do that, I wish I could say it isn't true." The doctor himself was close to breaking down in tears, even though he'd seen many deaths, "I don't think it's a good idea for you to back there right no-"

Jungkook ignored him and pushed past everyone, heading straight to the room you were wheeled into a few hours ago.

The second he saw you lying on the bed, cold and motionless; his mind shut down. That wasn't you. That isn't you. It can't be. He saw you yesterday, you were in his arms yesterday. That wasn't you. He didn't know who that was, but his Y/n was fine, she was at home sleeping, she had work tomorrow. They were going to hang out tomorrow when she was done. Get ice cream and walk in the park.

You were alive. You were fine. They were all pranking him and trying to make him cry. He should call you, call you and tell on them. They were pranking him and it wasn't funny. You would scold the other members and cuddle him to make it okay again.

The sound of Hoseok sucking in a deep breath brought Jungkook back, he turned and saw the other members staring at the person in the bed. They looked sick, like they were going to cry or throw up, Jimin looked close to passing out. Jungkook shoved past them, "you're all assholes, I'm telling Y/n on you and you'll be sorry when she scolds you." Taehyung reached out for Jungkook, tears flowing freely down his face, "J-Jungkook, where are going?"

"I'm going to call Y/n, leave me alone." The boys stared after him in horror. They couldn't process everything that was happening too quickly.

Jungkook's hands shake as he dials your number, listening to the ringing. It rings again and again and again. He hangs up and tries again, after more ringing he gets sent to your voicemail; 'Hello this is Y/n, I'm sorry but I can't answer the phone right now, please leave a message. Unless you're Jungkook, in that case please call again, Kookoo! I'll answer for you.' your laugh bubbles out and then there's a beep, his voice gets caught in his throat, "Y-Y/n, it's Jungkook, please answer your phone, the boys did something horrible and I need to hear you." He tries to keep a steady voice, calling once more and getting the same message that says if it's him, to call again. So he does, again and again and again.

"JEON JUNGKOOK!"

Jungkook leapt up from your bed and sprinted to the living room after hearing your shout come from the bathroom, no way was he letting you get ahold of him now. He couldn't stop his giggles as he jumped on the couch and waited for you to get your revenge. Sure enough a few seconds later you stormed out of the hallway, eyes ablaze with fury.

"Jeon Jungkook what the hell is the matter with you??" Your hands are on your hips as you glare at the boy playing innocent in front of you.

"What do you mean Y/n?" His eyes are big and brown causing you to hesitate getting angry, curse his beautiful doe eyes.

"I'm gonna get you back Jeon." You harshly point an accusing finger at him and turn to stalk back to your room. At the sight of your wet shorts he bursts into a fit of laughter. You swing back around and glare at him again.

"Something funny?" There's no hint of amusement in your voice and he chokes back another laugh, biting his lip and shaking his head. You turn and go back down the hallway to change, "very unoriginal prank Jungkookie, very unoriginal. Just you wait. I'll get you worse than that." Yeah, plastic wrap on the toilet seat when you really had to pee was very unfunny.

"Love you babe!" He calls after you, smiling to himself, and chuckles when he hears you shout back,

"Shuddup, Kookoo."

"Shut up, you're a liar!!"

"Jungkookie, please, just listen to me." Tears streamed down Jimin's face as he held his hands out to his best friend, completely helpless.

"Get out!" Jungkook's voice broke despite the volume he was using.

"I'm not gonna leave you." Jimin's voice trembled and he sat down on the couch inside their dorm.

Jungkook clenched his fists, trying not to lash out at Jimin. He just wanted to be left alone.

"Jungkook, you need to go to the funeral. It's the least you can do." Jimin speaks up again after a few minutes. Jungkook turned on him instantly, "the least I can do? The least I can do? Who the fuck do you think you are telling me what to do?!" Jimin flinched at the words Jungkook was shouting down at him.

"Do it for her."

"Shut up."

"She loved you Jungkook."

"Stop saying that."

"I won't, because it's true."

"IT'S NOT TRUE!" Jungkook hadn't meant to scream that loud, Yoongi ran into the living room from the back when he heard the shouting.

"What's going on?" Yoongi looked back and forth between the two boys, confusion that turned into sadness written all over his face when he saw Jungkook tearing up. Jimin was the one to speak up, "he won't go to her funeral next week. He says she didn't love him." Yoongi looked back at Jungkook and saw tears spilling down the boy's face. The thoughts running around in his head were going to swallow him up.

You were selfish. How could you leave him like that? He hated you. No he didn't. He couldn't hate you no matter how hard he tried. No, he hated himself for loving you.

"Jungkook, I think you should go. At least for some closure." Yoongi said quietly and cautiously. After a minute Jungkook finally nodded, he would go. If it meant it would help him forget you.

Whenever he had a bad day, your face would pop into his mind and he'd immediately text you, asking if he could come over. You would always reply right away, and he'd smile down at the words 'of course love, please come over.' So he would.

You would end up holding him in your arms, it didn't matter that he was bigger than you, your arms would wrap around as much of him as they could hold, gently rocking him back and forth. His tears hitting your chest and bringing tears to your own eyes, when he was in pain, so were you.

You'd sit there for as long as it took, a few times you two had been in that position all night long. Sometimes you would sing to him, his favorite songs, lyrics tumbling from your lips, voice cracking beautifully in his ears. His sobs would turn to shaky breaths as he listened to the imperfectly perfect sound of your voice. Your hand stroking his hair, letting him know that you were there, you'd always be there.

You lied to me.

Those are the only thoughts that pass through his head as he stands among all the people dressed in black. A picture of you smiling is sat on top of a closed casket, your eyes seemed to be looking straight into his.

Why did you lie?

Jungkook feels someone's arm touch his, he turns and sees your mother holding onto him. Her eyes are red and swollen from all the tears she's cried in the past week, and they don't seem to be stopping anytime soon. He turns and hugs her tightly, his throat closing up at her weeping. Once she collects herself she looks up at him, "thank you Jungkook," he looks at her in confusion, "what for?" His voice is barely above a whisper and he feels his throat closing up again at her next words, "for loving my beautiful daughter. You made her happy. I don't think we'll ever know why she did it, but you're the reason she was here for so long, I do know that. She wanted to marry you." A sob escapes Jungkook's throat, "I w-was going to ask her." Your mother cries harder and holds his arm tighter, "I know, I know sweetie, thank you Jungkook, she loved you so much. Thank you."

A little while into the funeral, Jungkook starts to feel himself panic; his breaths getting shorter and shallower. You weren't here to talk him out of this panic attack. You would never be here again. The other members are all sitting stone faced, their eyes are red and a few have tears welling up again. You're never going to make Yoongi laugh again, or make Jimin blush, or tease Namjoon for being clumsy, or compliment Jin on how handsome he is, you'd never dance with Hoseok again, and who would listen to Tae talk about the most random things, with a look of pure awe and interest in what he was wanting to say? Jungkook starts to hyperventilate and when people turn and look at him he rushes out of the room and into the hallway, trying to find someplace to be alone.

The hallway is dark and he sits on the floor a ways away from where the funeral is being held. That's when the tears come; flooding down his face instantly, and his sobs wrack his entire body, he can't get a deep enough breath in to calm himself down. So he sits there and sobs helplessly for a few minutes, each breath after the next getting caught in his throat.

"God," he finally chokes out after a while, "w-why did you take her away? There was so much we were going to do together. I never even got to say goodbye," then he clasps his hands and starts crying again, "I-I'll do anything, please just give her back to me. P-please let me have her back....God, please." Jungkook sits and cries for another few minutes, saying anything he can possibly think of that he would do to have you back. For you to be alive again. So many words he wanted to say and never would. He wanted to at least know if you were doing alright, up in the sky where he knew you were. He wanted you to be alive again.

But it was too late.

The fight you two were having had been going on for a while now, and frankly you were over it. You couldn't even remember why it started. But Jungkook was clearly still angry and wanted to get the last word, "maybe you should stop being so whiny and annoying Y/n, and then I'd listen to you!" That stung. You've fought before but you never called each other anything, your eyes start to water and you grab your bag, throwing it over your shoulder and heading for the door. Jungkook rolls his eyes, "where are you going now? Why do you think running away all the time is gonna solve everything?" He sounds exasperated and like he doesn't even want to keep fighting now.

You turn back to face him, "I'm getting some fresh air, thank you very much, and I don't see why you should care since I'm so annoying and whiny." You go to open the door and he stands up, coming over to you. You can see the regret at his words in his eyes, but you can't find it in you to get over it just yet. You needed a break. He puts a hand on the door to keep you from opening it, "Y/n, you know I didn't mean that." You scoff and reach for the door handle again before he grabs your hand, "then why did you say it, Jungkook?" He just looks down and stays silent, yeah that's what you thought. You yank your hand away and open the door, "fuck you Jungkook. Leave me alone."

A few hours later you had mostly calmed down and you were at home reading a book in bed, when your doorbell rings. You get up and walk over to it reluctantly, you already know who it is before you look through the peephole, but you do so anyway and see Jungkook standing there biting his lip, just like you knew he would be.

You open the door and he looks at you hopefully, so you open the door wider to let him in. He immediately wraps his arms around you in a tight hug and you can't help but to hug him back, you knew he was sorry and you were tired of being angry. You talk it out and he apologizes for everything he said, you apologise for the things you said too. Eventually you end up watching a movie and cuddling after talking through it all. He kisses the top of your head and you smile, grateful that you two could always work things out. You mess with the little silver ring on your finger, smiling and remembering how he won the matching pair for you both.

"Jungkook, maybe you should take a break." Jimin wipes the sweat off his forehead and walks to his bent over friend slowly, putting his hand on his back and rubbing it, "look, we have a while to learn it, please just rest Kook-" Jungkook jerks away roughly, "please don't call me that." His voice was different, heavier and without a lot of feeling, it had been like this for almost a year now. Jimin looks hurt but says nothing more. They all saw a difference in Jungkook since you passed away, they would hear him crying in his room every night, they wouldn't miss the tears that choked him during certain songs they performed. There was an emptiness around them all, and they weren't sure it would ever be filled again.

Tae walks over when he sees the scene unfolding, he looks at Jungkook and tries not to look upset for his best friend, knowing it would just make things worse, "alright guys, we're all going to take a ten minute break...Jungkook can we talk please?" Jungkook huffed but agreed, moving over to sit on the couch on the side of the dance room. The other members walked out of the room to give them some privacy.

"Look, Jungkook. I'm not going to try to say anything much, but I do want to say this. Y/n loved you, she was hurt and couldn't tell anyone. It isn't your fault, Jungkook. No one saw it coming."

"I should have."

"Don't say that."

"It's true though, what kind of boyfriend was I that I didn't even see the signs? That she felt like she had to hide it from me? I-it's all my fault." Jungkook's eyes start to water and his breathing starts to get quicker and shaky, a panic attack was coming on. Tae swallows his tears and reaches over to put a hand on Jungkook's leg, bringing him back. Tae swallows hard and trudges on,

"It wasn't your fault. But, I think you need to seriously think it all through, and then let go."

"I don't want to let go."

"Why not?"

"Because no matter how hard I try and say I want to, I don't want to forget about her."

"You don't have to forget about her Ko-...Jungkook...But I think she wants you to keep living without her now, she would be sad to see you like this."

"Then maybe she shouldn't have been so selfish and decide to leave me alone."

"You don't mean that." Tae can't keep his shaky tear stained voice under control and he turns away to wipe his eyes.

Of course he didn't mean it, but being angry seemed to make it hurt less. Maybe he should try, like Tae said, maybe he could try to keep you in his heart while continuing to live.

Like you would want, and he always wanted to make you happy.

"Hey, Y/n. What about this one?" Jungkook tugs you over to the huge ride, the kind that swoops around in a giant loop. Your stomach drops to your feet but he looks so excited; bouncing up and down with his big doe eyes shining brightly.

Well, at least you hadn't eaten anything yet. Maybe you could do it once before lunch and get it over with. He lets out a shout of excitement when you nod and then he pulls you over to the line of people waiting to get on the ride. As you wait for your turn you tap your foot anxiously, Jungkook notices and wraps his arms around your waist. You smile and he lays his chin on your shoulder, "love you baby~" you tsk and bring your hand up to pat his cheek gently, "love you too, I hope you know that since I'm doing this for you." He chuckles and holds you tighter.

After the ride, which wasn't as bad as you thought–having held Jungkook's hand tightly the entire time–you two find a table to get some lunch. You order and try to ignore Jungkook's teasing about how hard you held his hand and how he thought it would fall off. He keeps laughing as you roll your eyes playfully and avoid looking at him.

When the food comes, you both start to eat, then you notice a little girl and her older brother ordering some ice cream at one of the many food stalls in the fair, a few feet away. Jungkook turns to see what you're smiling at and smiles widely himself as he turns back to you. "I bet that's what our kids will do someday, Y/n...We should take them here, right?" You look at Jungkook happily and nod, you couldn't wait for that day to come.

Later that day, you and Jungkook stopped at the claw machines, Jungkook insisted on trying to get you a stuffed animal. After about ten tries he frustratedly walked away, you tried not to laugh at him walking away only for him to see another machine and say he actually wanted to get you that; which was a little egg with two silver rings in it. One for you and one for him, he said.

Miraculously he was able to get the little egg and he cheered loudly in triumph, reaching down to get it out of the machine and quickly telling you to put the smaller one on. It was cute, and Jungkook's matched.

Later you ended up getting the engraving, 'forever and always' on it.

Jungkook's eyes open slowly, the sun shining in through the window, signalling to him that it was time to get up now. He closes his eyes again and turns onto his side, pulling the covers up to his chin and taking a shaky breath. He tries his best to conjure up the dream he just woke up from, he didn't want to leave. Please come back. His eyes start to burn and tiny tears pour over his lashes when he blinks.

His alarm goes off a minute later but he just ignores it, the insistent beeping drowned out in his thoughts, he can't escape. When he opens his eyes again he sees you lying beside him. He blinks but you're still there.

"Hi Kookoo."

"Y/n?" His voice shakes uncontrollably as he tries to make sure he isn't dreaming.

Your eyes fill with tears and you nod, "yes Kookie, it's me."

"H-how...are you still alive? Y/n are you actually alive?" His voice starts to raise in hopes that maybe this had all been a nightmare. A horrible horrible nightmare. He starts to sit up on his arms but his face falls and his heart crumples when you shake your head, tears slipping out and rolling down your soft cheeks. Your face looks so soft and healthy, not at all what it looked like the last time he saw you.

"I'm sorry Kook, I'm so sorry." Your voice cracks and wavers as you start to cry. He reaches out and touches your wet cheeks, slowly rubbing the tears away and at the same time doing the one thing that he knew always calmed you down.

"Shhh, it's okay love. Don't cry please." He didn't care if this was a dream, you were here. His beautiful Y/n had finally come back to him. He wipes your tears gently, after he wipes them all away he keeps his hand on your cheek, softly rubbing with his thumb.

"Jungkook, I need to say something."

He looks at you and feels his tears returning, he nods and says slowly as if just realizing something, "that's why you're here isn't it? That's why you came back." You close your eyes and take a deep breath, then nod while you bite your lip, trying your very hardest not to throw yourself into his arms and cry.

"Y-yes, Kookie I need you to-"

"Don't."

"What?" You open your eyes again and see the desperation in his face as he seems to be having a battle with himself, "don't tell me, please. Y/n please don't leave me again." He starts to cry and your heart is torn to pieces, he reaches out to you and you push yourself into his arms.

Jungkook's mind is racing a mile a minute. You were in his arms, you were alive and in his arms. He hadn't felt your warmth for over a year and a half now. Jungkook buries his face into your hair and inhales deeply, memories flooding back into his mind. "Y/n, are you okay? Please tell me you're doing okay." He feels your tears wetting his t-shirt and he holds you tighter, listening carefully when you start talking again–voice muffled by his shoulder, "I'm alright Kookie I promise, but I miss you...I'm sorry baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't realize the effect it would have until it was too late." Jungkook's breath catches in his throat at your words. He leans back and brushes your damp hair out of your face, "how long do I have?" He whispers sadly, tears threatening to choke him once again.

The walk. The walk in between the cherry blossom trees all that time ago when he confessed, that's where you went.

You walk side by side, holding hands, eventually you stop and turn to Jungkook. He focuses on you even though all he wants to do is turn away and cry. You smile at him and squeeze his hand, "Jungkook," he blinks hard and nods in affirmation that he's listening. "Jungkook, I don't have a lot of time. But I need you to promise me something." He nods again and you continue, "w-when I leave, I'm not coming back," you ignore the tears streaming down your face, "I need you to promise me that when I let go of your hand, you won't look back." Jungkook takes in a shuddery breath, "I'm sorry Y/n, that I didn't see, I couldn't save you. I don't know if I ca-" you cut him off before he can finish. "You can, and none of it was your fault Kookie, it isn't your fault. If I could take back what I did," he shakes his head tears already slipping out again, but you continue, "I would take it all back. I made the biggest mistake of my life, and I hurt you in the process. I ruined the future we were going to have one day." You're full on crying now as he cries next to you, his shoulders shaking, "and I want you to know how sorry I am." He pulls you into a hug and cries into your shoulder, his breath comes out in heavy gasps, "I forgive you Y/n, I forgive you, I love you so much." He keeps repeating those words while you hold each other for another minute, just crying. Tears of sadness and relief that he forgave you spill out of your eyes and you clutch onto him.

You two go to a ton of different spots that you had dates, stopping to get ice cream, to fulfill the promise you broke the day you died. Eventually you end up at the fair, standing in front of a claw machine that was full of random items, one of them being a small egg that contained two rings. You stare at the machine for a minute before turning to the young man that you loved. He was staring at you, one hand in his pocket fiddling with something, you look at him curiously and he looks down, pulling his hand out and opening it, to reveal a small ring with a chain around it, your ring.

"Jungkook, you still have that?" You refuse to cry again, but you see his eyes well up with tears. You hated that he cried so much nowadays, and hated more the fact that it was you who caused it.

"Of course, we made a promise Y/n, 'forever and always', remember?" You nod tearfully not caring about your stupid 'no crying' rule anymore, and he wipes your eyes gently.

"I'm scared Y/n, I don't want you to leave me again." His voice trembles and he doesn't try to stop the tears. You hug him tightly, letting your own tears escape for the last time, "I'll be with you Kookoo, forever and always. But I have to go know, please keep your promise?" He nods as he hugs you against him, then he pulls back and kisses you quickly before he starts to cry harder. Jungkook hugs you one last time, enveloping you in his big strong arms, the last time either of you would feel each other.

The regret and anger with yourself is overwhelming you, but Jungkook hugs it all away. In a tight warm promise that he's forgiven you and he will keep his last promise to you.

You both pull away and that's when you turn, giving his hand one last squeeze before you walk a few feet, "goodbye Jungkook," you whisper your last words to him, he swallows hard, "goodbye Y/n, I love you." With those words in your ears you walk away and disappear.

Jungkook lets out one last sob and puts the necklace with your ring on it around his neck. He got to say his goodbye. He would never forget you, he didn't want to. But, he forgave you and he would live on with your memory in him. He kept in his heart what he knew; that someday, he would see you again. When you meet in the clouds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a/n 2.0: I can't stop sobbing rn. Somebody help me. I'm so sorry for this, but I hope this shows you that there is always another way, but when it's over, it's over. You can't come back. More people than you know will miss you. The future is unknown. So please stay.

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clericbyers · 5 years

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my last logical braincell: give it up buddy the production team wouldn't put two of the main characters in a gay relationship, be smart and realistic / all my other brain cells, completely unhinged, studied in honk honk university: bylerbylerbyler it's the most valid ending They have to bring this developing relationship to its climax which means Byler

okay me…i flip flop between complete utter confidence in them being the endgame couple and complete utter resignation that it won’t happen. but god I just…watching st1 and momentarily ignoring the fact that other seasons exist has me so hooked on endgame byler bc, god its so obvious Mike loves Will. I rewatched 1x03 yesterday and at the end when Mike yells at El, Lucas says, “Mike, please don’t do this.” and he’s crying and Dustin is too but Mike physically cannot handle being there. He is torn up in a way no one else is, he was shouting, “what is wrong with you” at El, because he can’t handle his own emotions and takes it out on other people (as we see in st1 still when he fights Lucas and shoves Troy and he yells at El) and he can’t handle the utter pain at having his hopes dashed because he was tied to El in order to find Will and in his mind she broke that promise even though he hadn’t broken his promise of keeping her safe.

And Lucas and Dustin probably knew Will was something different for Mike; hell, Dustin called Lucas Mike’s best friend which discounted himself and Will, and while it’s later implied he didn’t include himself because ‘you can’t have more than one best friend’ which Mike cutely called bs on because they are all his best friend, Will wasn’t included in that despite Mike being the most torn up about Will’s disappearance. And Dustin is the most observant about relationships, how he points out that Lucas is mad Mike is putting El over the Party (a theme that carries into ST3 at that), yet he didn’t call Will Mike’s best friend and that’s…that could be said to be because he knows Will and Mike are something different but he can’t say what because what is more than a best friend anyway?? Lucas and Dustin both didn’t go after Mike when he biked away from the lake despite then both protesting his emotional breakdown, much as we see in ST3 when Lucas didn’t go after Mike or Will after Will stormed out.

And just throughout the whole first season, even in the very next episode (1x04), Ted and Karen are watching the news about the body being fished out and Ted says something like, “Should I go down and talk to Michael?” and Karen says, “No, he’ll come to us when he’s ready.” and yes they are talking about Mike dealing with Will’s death, but after 1x02 where Karen talked with Mike about opening up to her about how he’s dealing with Will’s disappearance and how coded that is, the 1x04 conversation has another layer to it. Especially when the very next shot is Mike in the basement longingly looking through his binder of Will’s drawings before he snaps at El for hurting him. It’s not just about Will’s “death”, it’s about Mike’s feelings for Will, too, that become more apparent once Will isn’t in his life anymore.

And that story, that underlying story of Mike struggling to come to terms with Will’s death, his feelings for Will, and consequently projecting them onto someone who is repeatedly mistaken to be a boy (even Will himself), is always gonna be there and dropping it makes no sense at all when it’s a core of the reason why this show even happens. Mike’s love for Will brings him back as much as Joyce and Jonathan’s love (and dedication) for him did. Mike’s love made him disobey Hopper and gather his friends and consequently find El, who does indeed help find Will. That cannot be ignored, it’s in the story, it’s been written and it cannot be erased because this story cannot be told without the integral fact that Mike loves Will. Mike is the most distraught of the kids; we constantly see his reaction to everything unfolding when it comes to Will. He has Will’s drawings on the basement walls and the fact that, when bringing the other seasons into the fold, he still has Will’s drawings on the wall despite having a girlfriend and having Will physically back for the past 8 months and trying to grow out of his childhood interests…that’s very telling.

wow I’m ranting but uhhhhhh…I just, cannot imagine completely derailing from the story of ST so much to discard the obvious path toward Mike and Will coming to terms with their feelings for each other. But despite all the evidence and even what I just talked about here, I hate that I still feel like there’s a chance the side story of this gay romance won’t be resolved by the show’s end. And that’s sad…it’s sad that I have to convince myself this won’t happen despite the contrary evidence because too many times it doesn’t happen but goddamn it’s just, it’s weaved so much into the plot!! Even the fact that ST mirrors the D&D campaigns (esp in ST1) and D&D is the in show analogy for Mike and Will’s relationship proves that their relationship is deeply essential to the show, it cannot be dismissed, and it will be addressed in full.

ST3 does give us minimal byler in comparison to ST2 but I dare to say…ST3 was explicitly showing us Will loves Mike back because ST1 and ST2 already showed us that Mike loves Will. ST3 gave us jealous and pining Will and gave us that argument that reveals Will’s feelings toward Mike. Mike’s trying to get over it by being with El, who he does love and care for but as Lucas said in 1x05, “You’re blind…blind because you like that a girl’s not grossed out by you”. Mike likes the idea of liking El, he likes that El likes him as he’s kept her safe so he pursues her and clings to her, but he’s trying to force something that doesn’t work. Lucas (in 1x05) said “Wake up man! Wake the hell up,” but Mike couldn’t do that. He couldn’t “wake up” and come to terms with the full truth so he merely yelled at Lucas to ‘shut up’ (similar to how in ST3 Mike couldn’t retort against anything Will said until he came at Mike’s relationship with El) and then physically fought him.

In ST3, Mike wouldn’t allow himself to believe in spending the rest of his life with Will; funnily, he was telling Will to wake up in that 3x03 argument as much as Lucas told him to back in ST1, but when Will said, “I guess I did. I really did.” he was, in a way, saying he is already awake. His nightmare was the UD, his nightmare was the MF and the now-memories, but when he woke up from all of that, he was with Mike. He was in the basement playing games with Mike and Mike is still the one who hasn’t woken up, who is still living under some delusion. And that’s when Mike really realizes his feelings were returned and he quite possibly fucked it up. He chases after Will and apologizes but again, the argument was unlike any argument he had with anyone else on the show. Mike yelled at El and Lucas in ST1, he yelled at Hopper in ST2 and ST3, he yelled at Max in ST3, but he never yelled at Will during that argument until he said “It’s not my fault you don’t like girls,” and even then it’s not yelling to the extent he did with others. This was different, this meant something entirely different for him and he wanted to fix it ASAP, asking if Will was okay as he always once he found him at Castle Byers, checking in as he cannot help but do.

And Yeah, Mike spent the rest of the season trying to mend things with El (why not go all out for her then since he feels he ruined what he could have had with Will during that argument, but going all out for her only reveals further his lack of trust in her—sauna scene when he found out she spied, cabin scenes where he argued with Max about her powers, claimed he loved her but couldn’t say it to her face, and then was hesitant to even say yes to her asking him to trust her, supermarket scene where he couldn’t say love to her face) but at the end!! they are still awkward !! He still lied to her by saying he didn’t know what he said in the cabin!! Their friendship is safe but their romance is gone !! but Mike and Will? Using D&D to establish the change in their relationship, to confess and show that Mike has to make a move because Mike has always made the first move with Will, but Will is gonna be receptive because he knows it’s reciprocated now.

oh my god I just….there’s too much evidence I cannot imagine this all gets tossed to the side. I guess I’m in one of my “I have high hopes” moods while answering this ask haha

#anon #yams answers #meta #i totally didnt mean to just go so long with this but my god i am!! i am in a mood #sorry anon this probably isnt what you expected ahaha

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