#i would like to keep these a little shorter and more succinct lmao

[lapismaid]

Tonight I finished Vol. 1 of the JK Haru is a Sex Worker in Another World manga adaptation.

For context, I have no knowledge of this series beyond this adaptation. So whether or not it's a "good adaptation" of the light novel, I'm not able to say. Maybe it sucks actually! I wouldn't know! What I can say though, is that I enjoyed this quite a lot. It's an isekai focused on, well, Haru, as she gets by in her new life as a sex worker at a brothel in a very standard isekai world that just has a liiittle problem with being incredibly and exhaustingly misogynistic.

I really like Haru. She's got a bit of gremlin energy that I always appreciate, and her conversations with the other girls at the brothel are very cute. She's a bit competitive too, wanting to climb the ranks and get among the top-sellers. She's great.

I... can not say the same for majority of the men here. There's two recurring male characters who pay for Haru's services and several one-offs. The one-offs largely suck and are terrible people. One of the recurring characters is thankfully relatively innocent and kind to her. The other... blegh. He sucks so fucking much lmao. But that's also kind of the point.

...okay so let me get this out of the way. Yeah, as you might expect from the title, there's sex in here. She works at a brothel, not a huge surprise. But the sex scenes, are very much not sexy. They're generally uncomfortable at best, and at worst, incredibly disturbing, which is very much the intention. As I said, the setting here is systematically cruel to women, and the work is incredibly blunt about it. I would say if you're sensitive to uncomfortable topics around sex, this is something to very much keep in mind. There's some nasty and demeaning stuff that gets said and done to Haru.

It's not all a bummer though. The humor, when it does come in, is a lot of fun. The picture above is just one example of some of the very fun writing in here. Haru's inner monologue is a consistent highlight and it makes her very endearing.

I'll definitely be reading more in the future, but I think I want something a liiiittle more wholesome for my next read lmao

[aeroknot]

k so some ns headcanon as requested by @spaceygayroses​

i pulled them from my long-as-fuck (like 700 chapters long) google doc but almost every one of those is like..... paragraphs long!! so i chose shorter ones!!

.....surprising to absolutely no one, i have no self-control when it comes to these two

a ) When naruto met sakura

b ) A mere few, fast weeks into dating, they have a discussion in the early evening about telling friends and family, and they agree to do it the next day. After finally coming up for air during their celebratory makeout session, she tries to shove him out the door to get on with their evening plans, she having to go to work. Deep down she’s amused that as she keeps ending kisses and pulling away, he keeps dazedly following after her with his mouth, not even opening his eyes. She gets persuaded back into it a few times. when a neighbor’s door slams she’s knocked out of their reverie and tells him to stop being a giddy schmuck and go! and laughs as he exaggeratedly swoons down the hallway of her apartment complex (well, she thinks he’s purposefully exaggerating, but he’s not, he’s authentically that mushy / dramatic) At like 1am she wakes up to boisterous noise outside and goes to her balcony to find naruto and kiba and shikamaru, all pretty inebriated tho actually the latter two more so than the former (he’s just using inebriation as a cover), and naruto’s standing on the gate at the edge of the little apartment yards singing songs he’s making up as he goes about how happy he is, crowing about dating his precious sakura-chan. She leans over the edge of the balcony and starts shaking her fist at him and scolding them and he just does the will smith pose and motions to her and shouts at kiba and shikamaru “DO YOU SEE HER!! HAVE YOU EVER MET MY GIRLFRIEND!!!” and they are just guffawing. Sakura hisses “naruto!! My neighbors!!” and he slurs, “awwww fuck ‘em!! One of ‘em slamming their door’s why i’m down here instead of up there loving you! I saved their asses, so they can just deal with me appreciating yours!!” and she just goes “YOU ARE.. SUCH A DUMB. ASS.” “yeah, but i get to be YOUR dumbass!!” “......I’m coming down to get you before Kakashi sics ANBU on you” and they all fully expect he’s done for as they watch her march out the stairwell resolutely, her speed increasing, but then she smiles while she jumps the gate even tho it’s not that tall and hops onto him, her legs around his waist, his hands supporting her under her thighs, and they alternate between laughing giddily and kissing

c ) they get married a month or so after his inauguration, which means HE’S the hokage that legalizes the marriage papers with his signature. and i just like to think… perhaps naruto is still his usual emotional self during the ceremony and does cry in happiness a bit during their vows… but he gets super sappy / sobby when alone in his office and signing the marriage papers as hokage. that’s…. that’s embodying both of his oldest dreams IN ONE MOMENT.

d ) they adopt twice, their first and last kids (of five): first is Arashi, last is Namika -- both names that reference Minato. Arashi asked them to rename him; he was six-ish when they adopted him. Namika’s name referencing Minato actually happens to be coincidence. she’s Shinachiku’s classmate and her parents are killed shortly after they graduate the academy :’( they give her a place to stay and it turns into adoption.

Arashi was shy and quiet with most people. he makes Naruto think of both Minato and Sasuke. Arashi was intimidated by Sasuke at first, but they become real close. Kurama loves Arashi bc he’s clever as fuck and adores studying history. Arashi has insecure attachments and is distrustful/distant for a while but when he’s older becomes a natural leader of his peers (tho sometimes even then can still seem distant). he has a very strong sense of justice like his parents. 

Namika is the perfect blend of chill and motivated. she’s so chill she gets along with all of the siblings. in fact she’s the only one without problems with anybody: shinachiku and sakuya butt heads, and arashi and konohana go at it all the time. while those four are shoved into get-along shirts naruto and sakura cuddle namika really exaggeratedly and joke about the exhausting nature of her siblings

e ) the kiddos kiss kurama good morning (naruto’s tummy)

f ) predictably, he takes every chance he gets to kiss sakura’s forehead, particularly right on her seal (he likes to kid around about her seal and say “sakura-chan, geez, you went through all that trouble training just for this tiny little target for my kiss”). she’s a little bashful, or kinda harumphs when he does it in public or when she’s miffed at him. then their kids notice, first realized by one of the youngest ones, and start copying him, as kids do: learning by imitating their parents. from there on out she’s often in tears or very near tears when they do this.

g ) it’s affection like this that grips her heart with gratefulness to be with him. he is continuously providing all she needs for her insecurities to be soothed and her dreams to be encouraged. these expressions of love are so deeply tailored to how he can best adore all that makes her, her. she sometimes can't believe how every expression of his love is permeated with his intense understanding of who she is, what she wants, often in ways so breathtakingly simple, honest and ingenuous that she wonders if he even consciously realizes the perfect appropriateness of his gestures.

h ) They are constantly hiding ink & brushes & markers from their youngest children bc in addition to mimicking forehead kisses, they’re constantly drawing on each other’s faces to give each other mommy’s “sparkle beauty sticker” and daddy’s “fox-marks” … which…. Unfortunately sometimes they pronounce as “fucks-marks” and naruto kinda…. Shrugs and makes a face like he’s conceding they might have a point (as in marks that once “fucked over” village approval of him)…. sakura’s horrified But she still laughs really hard when he starts calling any scratches he receives from their lovemaking “fucks-marks”

i ) if anyone makes the mistake of saying something particularly negative or abhorrent about naruto in front of her, especially if they’re insulting his suitability as hokage, she’s so incensed she can’t guarantee they’re gonna live to regret it. ...ok, sooo… she can’t and doesn’t actually maim or kill a fellow konoha citizen or any stuck-up diplomats... but damn is the confrontation and reprimand so scary; it’s like she flays their soul so deeply they have no shreds with which to hide their worst sins, guaranteeing no god would ever allow them into any heaven.

j ) naruto has to excuse himself every time sakura takes her gloves off with her teeth

k ) she loves to wash and pamper him. she doesn’t have an explanation for it, really. it can be but doesn’t always become sexual, but of course it’s always intimate. it’s not like a critique on him, finding him too dirty or something (he’s dirty, but usually in the ways she likes), she just really enjoys this avenue for expressing her affection. she likes preparing relaxing baths for him, or shampooing and rinsing his hair. she likes running her hands along his muscles, rubbing oils and lotions into his skin. she even likes to give him gentle little facial treatments if he’s in the mood to let her. (spoiler alert: he’s practically always in the mood to let her.)

l )  this vision came to me on a drive home form work: sakura on her period and being pretty damn miserable as far as cramping went. And she like…  has her arm over her eyes as she’s laying on her back on the bed and bemoaning her situation; she laments that she left her heat pack somewhere or let someone borrow it or something. So naruto just… takes his shirt off and gingerly lays across her, so they’re perpendicular with his stomach resting on hers. And she’s just like “what on earth are you doing” and he nonchalantly replies, “eh… I run hot. I’ll be your heating pad, Sakura-chan ♥”-- .. is… is there like, evidence the kyuubi chakra can make his temperature warm even if he’s not using it to fight?? Idk. either that or he just really does run hot, which makes sense because he is made of sunshine after all. “holy hell it actually helps. The heat along with the pressure” “yep I’m good for hot pressure” he winks at her and she rolls her eyes but is blushing. and so he just… provides his services pretty regularly from that point on. When this popped into my head I laughed for a full three minutes

m ) they both look young for a very long time, much to sooooo many people’s jealous chagrin. this is not bc I don’t like older features on them or want them to be ~~ooh~~~awww~~always the typical version of hotness~~~ it’s bc I legitimately think they both would appear youthful for longer than others bc of their chakra stores, etc. sakura’s would not be as intentional as tsunade’s, but it would still be an obvious side effect, and naruto is, well, naruto: I bet his uzumaki longevity is boosted by the demon chakra… plus his entire soul is youthful tbh

n ) they regularly visit orphanages together, bearing gifts and stories and their kind companionship. it amazes villagers-- how much their hokage and their head medic-nin, love their people. later in life they foster kids. (oh-- they had fostered two before immediately afterward fostering then adopting arashi)

o ) their first kiss is at Ichiraku’s (this hc is one’o those written in paragraphs but this is... the succinct version lmao)

p ) sakura finds the ring. she proposes. he’s so relieved and elated when she does especially because she isn’t mad he delayed (she actually is never harping him about it or lamenting/venting to her friends that they’re not engaged). she goes the grand scale public route. it’s a little unlike her, but she wants to reinforce in his mind and heart that she absolutely wants him, and wants the world to know it

q ) one of their really big fights happens when sakura is nominated as a hokage candidate. (this is also long paragraphs in the doc but i’ll try to summarize askjdlkj; -- update: i DID shorten it even tho it doesn’t seem it alskfjlaks)

she surpasses tsunade in every way: she fucking attains sage mode via wood style because why the hell wouldn’t she kishimoto??? (and i don’t CARE if people are poking holes in this, I will patch them up! let her be amazing--in other words let her be HER and the HEROINE she’s always been evolving into! why be a wet blanket when you can love women in manga? Tim Gunn voice: MAKE IT WORK!) (alsooo you know what I went and re-read this and it dawned on me this person wrote “should have,” not necessarily that she could one day develop this ability post-actual-canon. So I guess the headcanon is that Kishimoto liked women / her and gave her this arc from the beginning and all the details required to necessitate this development were actually present in the story). everyone admires the skills she’s exhibited running the hospital, and because she’s a war hero who is constantly at a major hospital and cures/saves people on the daily -- basically communicating that saving and protecting others is her life’s work -- a lot of citizens know her and really like and respect her... other reasons, etc., moving along tho-- 

naruto never thought his dream could ever be threatened or usurped by one of his most fierce and steadfast supporters. but…. He really loves her. And he’s so proud of her. And so he seriously considers refusing it if they choose him, so it would likely fall to her, or just flat-out taking his name out of the running so it’s not even a choice. It is in part self-sacrifice, but not merely; he respects her; reveres her strength and leadership; agrees she’s been indispensable and reliable for so long, and has worked so hard...  and, geez, he often thought HE was an underdog?? His life’s been no picnic, he’s worked incredibly fucking hard to get through things and evolve to his current station... but, well… his future wife has overcome so much to gain her status and prove herself, too, with as much effort as him, and while she did have teachers on the same level as him, she performed all her heroism with signiiiificantlllyyy less prophetic/demon/bloodline inertia to get her here (and by less we facetiously mean: none).

she’s pissed he’d even consider walking away from this goal. he tries to explain, “sakura. you��ve been my dream, too, for just as long.” it takes an emotional night -- mostly with her pleading for him to understand that she doesn’t want him to and is so sorry she’s ever made him feel like martyring himself is the only way to get her to acknowledge his devotion -- to settle it all. but yeah. he becomes hokage. a GOOD hokage.

r ) i love the idea of kurama just one day smugly bringing to their attention their shared connection to mito (i hc that mito developed the seal technique tsunade and sakura have) “naruto? what’s he saying? what does he mean?” “well, uh… y’know how baachan’s uzumaki mito’s granddaughter? and mito was kurama’s jinchuuriki before my mom? uh… what he’s saying is… mito developed the byakugou by accessing some of his chakra. so… that means…” and she finishes: “we’re both… kind of mito’s disciples?” “thanks ultimately to kurama’s chakra.. and.. being uzumaki...” he says somewhat blankly. and her brows shoot up as a sort of wry smile twitches on her lips, which then turns into a genuine grin. she looks at him with love in her eyes and repeats tenderly, “being uzumaki…” kurama immediately kinda regrets his decision to share this fact when they’re gonna be such sappy nerds about it

s) from my 1sentence challenge but it doubles as a hc: When he opened the door to their cozy apartment he saw her on the living room rug -- knees at a silly angle with fabric draped over her thighs, repeating the motion of her hand moving toward it, then away -- and when he got closer the red thread seemed to glimmer a greeting, her engagement ring winking in tandem, while she lovingly stitched the characters of his destiny onto the new haori.

..........i thought about stopping at n.... and then i decided i needed to get from n to s ;) (i’m embarrassing, i know, it’s ok, i’ve come to terms with it)