#i worked?? maybe 7 to 8 hours?? hm.

[townslore]

history has its eyes on you.

[yourloyalwatchdog]

CW: hypnotic induction, light confusion induction, obedience triggers, suggestion to share this post

· — ☆ — ·

they say your mind is in its absolute dumbest state while you're scrolling through social media.

it must be so easy to slip subtle messages into these simple strings of words that might sneak past your conscious mind and seep right into your subconscious, because that's the only part of you that needs to understand what i'm saying right now.

it can be so easy to start to zone out and find yourself forgetting everything around you. your eyes can sometimes find themselves so fixated on the screen, on reading each and every word so carefully that everything else you were thinking before becomes simply irrelevant, just pops away like bubbles in a clear blue sky.

and you might think you want to look away, but you'd be wrong. think about it. you haven't yet, have you? that must be because you really want to be here, right? so why would you look away now if you want this?

don't think about it too hard. or let your mind wander, that's okay too. either way, a part of you is clearly interested in what i have to say, so i know you'll come back for more. if you're still reading this, it's because

you want this.

i didn't put you in this state. you chose this, didn't you? i know you've been scrolling and scrolling for minutes, hours, or maybe even days waiting to find that certain someone who would be brave enough to tell you how you're completely docile right now.

that's okay. everybody feels this sometimes, when they scroll for such a long time. it's perfectly normal, so you can just allow yourself to let go and sink into it. everything else can just fade into the background while you focus more and more on my words.

there you go, that's better...

it's much more enjoyable when you let your mind relax and enjoy this feeling, now isn't it?

that's right. it feels good. you want this.

hm... i bet all those pesky thoughts are such hard work, aren't they? it must be exhausting, having to use your brain so much, huh? wouldn't it be so much easier to let me do all the thinking for you instead?

of course it would. so i'm going to do you a favor in a few moments, if you can just focus and follow along for me, ok?

very good. you're doing so well. you're really so good at reading every one of my words and letting them into your empty mind.

i'm going to count from 10, down to 1, and with every number, you may notice that it's becoming harder and harder to think of anything but the numbers. so eager to reach the next one, anticipating it, but staying focused on reading the words between, because that's what i've told you to do, and you probably don't have the mind to disobey me, do you?

or, of course, you might not notice anything at all as you become more and more...

blank.

you want this.

so we start with

10,

your mind drifting in a state of perpetual fuzz, like draping you in a soft, cozy blanket.

9,

relaxing into the warmth, because it's nice and comfortable and safe here.

8,

each number acts like the snap of my fingers, bringing you to attention and keeping your focus.

7,

reading more, thinking less.

6,

and however your body reacts, it's perfectly fine and normal.

5,

it means you're comfortable here with me, and that's very good.

4,

getting so close to where you want to be now, and however deep you want to go, you can go.

3,

it's exciting to realize that my thoughts are becoming your thoughts. you're becoming emptier. and that feels good.

2,

feeling so good now, so much bliss and deep relaxation. you're ready for me to finish counting, waiting so desperately for that last number.

and

1,

just let yourself

DROP.

you want this.

you want to be hypnotized, and it feels so good as you

DROP.

it's okay if you slump over a bit, or your eyes flutter. but you'll keep them open, because you want to keep reading.

you want to

DROP.

you want this.

and because you want this, you will allow it into your mind.

you want my words to be true.

it feels good when my words are true, doesn't it?

you want to nod your head.

and so you nod your head.

you want to

DROP.

every time i tell you to

DROP.

you go so much deeper.

and you want to go deeper.

you want this.

and because you want this, it will become true.

so when i, or anyone you trust to control you, tells you

you want this.

you'll find yourself wanting it. and it feels so natural, because you do want it, don't you? you must, if you feel this strongly about it.

and of course you do, because

you want this to be true.

and just like that, it is. but you've chosen to let it become true, and that is important.

you will only do what you're comfortable doing. wanting something doesn't mean you have to do it. you still have free will, and if you don't feel safe in doing something, you will not have to do it. remember this.

this is for your safety. i need you to be safe, and take care of yourself. good playthings take care of themselves.

now...

you want this.

you want to be hypnotized.

you want to read my words.

you want to obey my words.

you want to

DROP.

even deeper for me.

that's it. you've done so well.

so let's put this to the test, what do you say?

you want to like this post.

you want to reblog this post and share how good it made you feel.

you want to read this again whenever it comes up on your feed.

and when you reread this, the suggestions within will become so much stronger, and control you even deeper.

feel the desire to follow my suggestions grow stronger with each passing moment. but you won't yet. you'll finish reading this, and then you'll obey your orders.

after you've liked and reblogged this post, you'll wake from this trance as slowly or as quickly as you'd like. if you want to take a few minutes to bask in this pleasant relaxation, that's perfectly okay, and if you'd rather come all the way up as soon as you're finished, that's fine too. whenever you choose to wake up, you'll do so feeling refreshed, and ready to take on the rest of your day with a smile.

now go ahead and follow my instructions. i know you want to give in.

i hope you enjoyed this, and that you have a lovely rest of your day :)

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Retrogradation

Warnings: non/dubcon, coercion and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Part of Roo’s Pajama Party (October 7-8)

Prompt: Retrogradation - a backward movement. (List of prompts here) + this look

Note: Please leave some feedback and reblog <3 As always, I love to chat with you all. I hope you enjoy this one and have a lovely weekend.

This isn’t how you saw things going. Nothing ever really goes how you expect. You think you’d be used to it by now. That after all the disappointment, you would give up hope. You tried that too but it still hurts. 

You pull the blanket over the couch. You don’t anticipate a good sleep. The springs are broken and squeaky and the cushions not quite thick enough to pad the jabbing metal. You can’t complain, it’s somewhere to lay your head. That morning, you didn’t have even that. 

You try to fluff up the slightly dingy pillow. You just as sad for your brother as for yourself. This isn’t anyway to live. Thin walls, noisy neighbours, and that constant stale smell that doesn’t go away. Even so, you won’t spurn his kindness. It’s all you have. 

You can at least be grateful for the solitude. He left about an hour ago, said he’d be back in a few hours. You didn’t ask why. He’s an adult and you’re sure he has more to worry about than his errant sister. 

Before you can recline, footsteps make their way steadily down the hall. You stop and listen, watching the crack beneath door. For a moment, you think it’s just your brother but the knock that follows assures you otherwise. He wouldn’t do that. 

Hm. Maybe you should ignore it. If it’s his friend, they might assume that he’s not there. They knock again. It would be rude to not answer. What if it’s an emergency? 

You get up and cross to the door. You pause for just a moment as you think about how short your pajamas are. How the top is a bit too loose so that the top button hangs a bit lower than it should. They won’t think about that. 

You open the door and choke on your voice. You’re so stunned to see Mr. Smith there, you’re certain you’re dreaming. You must have fallen asleep and not even realised. You stare as his lashes flick to mirror your surprise. 

“Eh, think I might have the wrong place,” he says. “Sorry, love.” 

“That’s quite alright. It’s... do you remember me, Mr. Smith?” 

“Oh, yes, I do recall,” his cheek twitches, “you moved on from the kiosk, yes?” 

“I moved to the home store, sir,” you explain. He was a regular down at the south end location when you worked at the small coffee pop-up near the train station. “How are you doing?” 

He looks back and forth evasively and fixes his glasses, “very good, love. As ever.” He turns back to you. “And you...” his eyes wander up the splintering door frame, “suppose serving medium roast to the masses doesn’t pay much.” 

“It’s money. This... I’m...” you’re suddenly very self-conscious. Having to say it aloud is harder than you expect. “My brother’s letting me stay over. Just until I find a new place.” 

“Oi? What happened then?” He asks with a tweaked brow. 

“Evicted. They’re upgrading my flat to let at a higher price.” 

“Hm, I don’t think that’s very legal.” 

“I didn’t either,” you shrug. “Anyhow, I hope you find whoever you’re looking for.” 

“Me too. Say, I know it’s not your neighbourhood but you wouldn’t happen to know where I might find a lad by the name of Alex?” 

“Alex?” You echo and add your last name. “That’s my brother. How do you know him?” 

His blue eyes flicker and he takes a deep breath. His cheek ticks again. He smooths his hand over his slicked back hair. 

“Is he in?” He asks. 

“Not at the moment. Can I help? I can tell him you stopped by.” You offer. 

“Mm, well, it’s rather urgent. Any way you can tell me where he is?” 

You frown, “I can give him a call but I don’t know where he’s off to.” 

“That’ll do then.” 

There’s a solemnness to his agreement. He hardly seems happy about your solution. It is rather late. You suppose he doesn’t want to be waiting around all night. 

“Would you like to wait inside?” You ask. 

His cheek dimples and gives a single nod, “alright then.” 

You step back as he enters. You spin in search of your phone as the door clicks shut gently. You scoop up your phone and filter through for your brother’s number. You tap call and put the phone to your ear. Your keenly aware of Mr. Smith pacing by the door. It must be urgent with how restless he is. 

No pick up. You try a second time to the same end. You leave a voice mail then text for good measure. You shrug as you face Mr. Smith. 

“Sorry, sir, he’s not pickin’ up. Should I tell him you stopped by?” 

“Mm, you think he’ll be back soon?” 

“Well, he left a bit ago. I’m sure he’ll be back soon. If you want to stick around, I guess you can.” 

“Sorry if I'm imposing. I don’t mean to.” 

“No, it’s fine. Not my place,” you go to the couch and fold up the blanket and stack it on the pillow. You turn back to him once more. “Would you like a cuppa? I think Alex’as at least a few bags in the cupboard.” 

“Thank you but I’m alright,” he waves you off. “Your brother... you’re close to him?” 

“Erm, he’s my brother. We’ve not been very chummy since we were kids,” you shrug. You notice how his eyes flit around the room. You squint. “Are you looking for something?” 

His blue eyes meet yours. His jaw ticks and a dire shadow fills his eyes. You squirm. 

“You’ve any idea what business your brother’s mixed up with?” He asks. 

You swallow and shake your head, “he works down at the garage, I think.” 

“Oh, does he? And he lives here? Known some mechanics in my day, they take home a decent pay,” he says. “Yet he’s livin’ in a slum like this.” 

“Well, er, I...” a trickle flows down your spine. “Mr. Smith, why are you looking for me brother?” 

His eyes drop and he tilts his head. He sighs. He tucks his hands into his pockets before he looks at your again. 

“He’s taken something from me.” 

You stare at him. His tone, his posture, his very gaze, you know what he truly means. Alex has stolen from him. But what? 

“Well, why don’t we have a look around and see if we can find it--” you suggest. 

“That won’t do. It isn’t the sort of thing you just give back and call it even,” he says dully. His demeanour shifts with his timbre. He steps closer and you shy away. “And I’m not the sort to let that sort of thing go.” 

You know Alex lies. You know better than to buy into his stories but you wanted to believe. You wanted to hope. Still, even after all is lost, you really, truly wanted it all to turn out. 

“Oh,” you swallow.  

“You see, he’s crossed me. I’m not a man to be crossed and this isn’t it about getting back what he stole. It’s about the principle of it all. About teaching him a lesson,” he comes close until you have nowhere to go. Until he is right in front of you and the couch is against your legs. “I really wish you hadn’t have been here, sweetheart.” 

Your mouth falls open. His words are like a punch in the gut. You expect worse than that by the gleam in his eyes. 

“Mr. Smith, please, you don’t have to--” 

“You don’t get it. It’s not up to me,” he grabs you by the neck and you cry out.  

You bat your lashes at him as your eyes glisten. You don’t fight. You can’t. No matter what you do, you lose. Whether it’s him, your landlord, or life in general.  

He pushes you until you sit. His grip tightens for an instant than eases. He inhales through his nose so it flares out. 

“Will you listen?” He asks. You lower your eyes and nod. He sees right through you. He already knows you’re weak. “Alright then, don’t pull nothing.” 

He rescinds his hand. Your skin tingles where his fingers had dug in. He reaches to your top button, undoing it with both hands. You shudder and let out a squeak. He continues down the shirt and lets go. The fabric opens around your naked torso. 

Your bottom lip quivers as you stare at the tailored weave of his pants. He brushes his fingertips along your hairline and down your cheek. You lock up as his touch continues down your neck and wanders along your chest. He fondles your naked tits as your top slumps down your shoulders. 

“Get up.” 

You stand as he backs up. He grabs your upper arms and turns you with him. He takes your place on the couch. He sits back and braces his thighs. 

“Finish it. Everything off.” 

You nod and keep your head down. You shrug off the shirt and untie your shorts. You shimmy them down and kick them away.  

Your eyes are drawn up by his movement. You waver as you notice his open fly. He strokes himself above the rich brown fabric of his pants. You press your hands to your stomach and shudder. 

“Get on me,” he orders. 

You sway and dare to bring your eyes up to his face. You don’t understand. Mr. Smith was always so polite. He always tipped and wished you a good day. Why would he do this? 

“Bad luck, that’s all it is,” he assures you. “Isn’t my fault, eh? Blame your thief of a brother.” 

You gulp and step up. You bend and grab his shoulders. You feel as if you might collapse at any moment. He latches onto your hip with one hand and guides you down. You ease yourself down and wince as his tip brushes between your folds. You whimper. 

He lines up with your entrance and pushes you down. You stretch around him as you whine. Your voice grows louder and louder with each inch. Your tears leak out and you puff through your teeth. You’re set alight by the shame that underlines your pain. You won’t even resist. Like everything in life, you just let it happen. 

He takes your hand and lifts it to his cheek. He leans his jaw into your palm so his beard tickles you. He holds you like that as he rocks your hips. You roll against him, following his motion as you weep softly. He groans and bites his lip. 

You hang your head as you give yourself over to him. You snivel as your core swirls with heat and your skin speckles hotly. You bring your free hand up to wipe your nose. 

“Sir, does this—will this--” you can barely speak or think, “my brother...” 

He growls and pulls your hand further, hooking your arm around his neck as he forces you closer. 

“I’m still going to break his fucking hands,” he snarls. “But I think I’ll keep you too. Show him what it’s like to lose something.” 

You sob and nod. He runs his hand away from yours and up your arm. He nudges your chin up as he keeps your hips moving. 

He groans and grunts through shallow breaths, “don’t be sad, sweetheart. I’ll take care of you. Better than this heap.” 

[oneforthemunny]

Please Please PLease

Rank your spanking works ;)

oh???? oh!!!!!!

you want me to chose absolute insanity today hm?? ok fine. i will try.

10. curiosity killed the cat - with mafia!eddie and reader (kitten... get it? get the title lmao). i really enjoyed this one, but i feel like it's one of the shorter pieces i did. very fun, shows their dynamic very well.

9. candy caned - a special christmas holiday smut special with dom!eddie. honestly, would be ranked higher but i'm a little jarred at this whole work. not bc of anyone other than myself, i just had big plans to do all 12 before christmas and got so busy i didn't get to. still loved it and it was so fun to me!

8. take as needed - a newer work and one i had been working on forever lol. i like the idea of the emotional release spanking with bouncer!eddie and bartender!reader. that it was something she asked for and he did. very intimate to me i loved it.

7. hard learning - honestly, one of my favorites and longest fics. dom!steddie x sub!reader is not something i usually write for but them??? i loved them. i wrote this while i was in school too, so it was very much so a self indulgent piece.

6. hold your horses - the first (??) cowboy!eddie fic???? and therefore it holds a special place in my heart forever. also self indulgent bc i am a speeder lol.

5. treat me rough - will forever be one of my faves. rockstar!eddie and nb!reader domesticated but yet still horny and kinky??? sorry, it will always be one of my faves. them slutty and fun is a weakness to me, but this??? together, established, in love, and still kinky and fun??

4. switching it up- all the switching talk maybe is why this one has been on my mind, but this was born from a horny hour with dom!eddie that was my renaissance on here. my roman empire. my peak, and this was the product of it <3

3. light my morning sky - another goodie from rockstar!eddie and nb. their (second) wedding night in vegas?? drunk and in love?? horny??? infatuated?? the heart shaped paddle as a wedding gift?? it's so sexy and silly and fun!

2. marish hysteria - by far my pride and joy as far as spanking fics, almost my number one. cowboy!eddie?? and it took so long to finish. i was so proud of it and i love every second of it, enjoyed writing every second of it.

car troubles- the reigning champ tho will always be this one with dom!eddie. from the same horny hours as before, but this one sparked the spanking rage on my page lol. genuinely, was so easy to write bc i feel like we all wrote it together??? i got so many asks, suggestions, my inbox was FULL!!! i love it, feels like a community piece and therefore is number one in my heart.

[odetarifunk]

It was any other regular day in the mansion of Velvet and Veneer's, the assistants working on cleaning or protecting the rich environment. Often, they get yelled at by Velvet, Veneer is no exception. It was as if the twins expected everything to be perfect, despite the fact that they never invited anybody over, besides that interviewer who's often invited by Veneer, but that's it.

The Janitor down the hallway, named Charlie, was mopping up the water on the floor, cleaning it to be as shiny as possible. The walls reflected off of said water, as Charlie saw his own reflection in it through his long bangs. He would often blast techno, or R&B music to help him focus, and not die from boredom of going up and down the stairs pretty much every single day, mopping non stop. You'd think he's paid well to be continuing his job, though that was far from the truth. In reality, his paycheck is only $6.50 in a day. Not horrible, but with Charlie trying to save up money to go to college, all while trying to pay for his apartment's rent, it wasn't helping him at all.

Charlie would complain under his breath, arms swishing back and forth with the mop in his hands, feeling tired. He pauses for a moment to check his phone...

“8:30AM”

Great! Only...8 hours left, lunch break in 5 hours. Charlie told this to himself everyday. In reality? No it wasn't, this isn't great. Velvet and Veneer weren't even up yet! They slept like logs, and as soon as Crimp wakes the two up, they get all pissy and blame her, as if it wasn't her job to basically babysit the twins 24/7. Charlie huffs and shakes his head, about to put his phone away, until he swears that he heard a small voice behind him. Charlie tells himself that he was just hearing things again, until he felt a hand lightly shake his shoulder. He flinched, pulling his headphones down around his neck, turning his head around to see who was disturbing him.

“I don't think you're supposed to be on your phone right now.”

Said Veneer, arms crossed after he rubs his left eye with the back of his hand. He obviously just woke up, still in a white robe with 'V&V' imprinted with a golden color to it on the right side, his hair messy, eyesbags visible. Seeing the twins without makeup was rare, maybe even a bit disturbing to see them bare faced. Charlie falls back to his senses and shakes his head quickly, clearing his throat as he puts his phone away.

“No! No- I was just-”

Charlie tries to explain himself, resulting in Veneer shushing him, putting his hand up as a way to say 'hold the excuses'. Veneer was less strict compared to his sister Velvet, but that doesn't mean he isn't a jerk himself at times too. Veneer tries to speak in an authoritative voice, have some sort of dominance, but that accent of his made it next level impossible.

“Ah-ah-ah, no. Listen here, we're- like- not gonna be doing those little excuses here, got it?”

Veneer shoves a finger into Charlie's chest as he leaned to his height, barely being taller than the janitor at all. Charlie had to hold back a snicker when Veneer put on his "serious guy" act, barely feeling intimated at all. If it was Velvet however...that would be a different story. Though this was Veneer, the one who cried over his favorite rollerskates breaking. Charlie had to make his face look understanding, nodding in response to Veneer. The janitor wasn't in the mood for any scolding today, not this early the morning.

“Understood.”

Charlie had a soft voice this time, about to place his headphones back over his ears again and start cleaning once more, before Veneer speaks up one more time.

“Understood what?”

Veneer questions, still keeping his act up. His shoulders go less tense, arms falling down to his sides. Charlie lets out a loud sigh at that, knowing exactly what the popstar wanted.

“Understood, sir...”

Charlie mumbles, giving Veneer a small, apparent smile on his face. Veneer wanted to seem as intimidating as possible, cool as he could possibly be.

“Hm, thank you.”

Veneer goes back to his regular tone, walking away after their little conversation. Charlie watches the green haired man walk away, turning back to his mop that was slipping out of his hands. Charlie shrugs his shoulders to lift his headphones back in place. How awkward, yet Charlie knew that he won't forget about the incident for today.

(Part 1 of Venitor😣😣 part 2 might be out soon!)

[vinnoa-articles]

Want

[Image by Eiichiro Oda]

Habit Substitute Drabble Series! This will be 7 out of the 8 drabbles I will be writing, because, why not? Some characters like certain things on a daily. But what if you were there?

Here are the links for the others.

[Luffy] [Zoro] [Usopp] [Sanji] [Law] [Smoker] [Crocodile]

Rating: Everyone

Word count: 2,124

Type: Fluff, some angst, flirting

Characters: Crocodile, reader (AFAB)

Trigger warnings/content: Some threatening words, pet names like "doll", swearing, mentioning of death/trauma about the marines

“Hm,” as he sits on his throne, looking down at those pure eyes. Kneeling before his steps, pledging her allegiance to him, her soul, her body, her loyalty, everything to him, it bored him to just watch everyone do the same thing, quietly fearing him, glancing over their shoulder to see if he was there, to take his orders without hesitation. “So…” ah…another one of these, thinking as he gently scratched the armrest with his hook. Same shit, different people, every.single.day. Slipping into the same routine, not wanting to go out of the habit of the ordinary, because what is the reason? There was none. Everything was boring, it was not fun, no point, it didn’t give him a challenge, no goal in sight, no reward at the end, not even gratification.

“Go help out the others, do what you want, just don’t cause issue fo’me  just get out of my sight.”

“Did you want me to pick up some cigars from the village?” Her voice smooth as sand, another futile attempt to kiss his ass, typical of new recruits.

“Do what you want,” avoiding even looking at her. She was merely another pawn within his empire, no one really notable in his mind. Other than his rivals, no one stuck out, it was the same people, interacting with him day in and day out, passing the days as if it was clockwork as days turn into nights, nights turn into weeks, weeks into months, with people coming and going, dying or being taken away. The gentle shuffle of her getting up, bowing as her outfit harmonized with the sound of sand kicking up.

“I see sir,” her voice velvety, soft, gentle like those calm nights. “I shall come back in a few hours to give you a report then.” Typical, just a worthless pawn that won’t be of use to him. Other than a pretty face that can maybe get some money from the village, there was no way she had any potential at Baroque Works. A yawn, and rolling his eyes as he waves his hand before leaning on that same hand, his jaw resting as he stares up at the hole in his ceiling. The blue sky overhead with no clouds in sight, it was bright out, a bird or two flew over, as free as ever. Resting his eyes would only pass by some time before maybe someone brings paperwork, maybe a civilian, treasure, who knows at this point. Rubbing his cheek, the finger running along his scar, breathing in and out, the taste of musk, dust and tobacco flow through his lungs. Slowly ensuring the steady flow of oxygen with the intoxicating taste of bitterness pulsing his veins. 

“Boring…” muttering under his breath, his words breathed out with the exhale of smoke. “Hm…what to do now…” his mind wondered what he could do, it’s been awhile since he had any action, both fighting and just touch. Sure, he could take anyone in the village, but many feared him. Though it turned him on to see people trembling in others arms, it was more so how they ran to their partner for comfort, wiping the tears with their fingers as they soothed their emotions by stroking their hair, and yet it wasn’t enough for him to pursue. If only they would melt in his arms, instead of fearing him, he wanted someone to run into his arms for comfort, inhaling in their scent, kissing the top of their head to show protection, knowing their place as they are useless and they have to rely on him. Yet, not one person ran to him for protection, rather, they always ran to him to warn him or tell him something, quickly running away in fear of his reaction, which was overbearing as he was a warlord, now serving under an emperor that he could easily overthrow.

“Sir?” Fluttering his eyes open, the new recruit was before him, her figure in a tight near black navy blue dress. Thin straps decorating her shoulders, doing nothing to hold up the tight dress that hugged her body, the subtle musk, floral perfume, lips dusted with dark red like wine, hair moving subtly as her head tilted up at him as she kneeled on both knees, those lips so sinful that maybe he didn’t see it earlier when she was bowed down earlier. “I got you a gift from the village,” holding a tan satchel, with a purple string tying the top together. “A gift for letting me join.” Humming, there was a lot of doubt this was a true gift to create a simple connection, instead to butter him up to get a higher status.

“Open it then,” his cigar falling from his lips as it dissipates as it hits the ground. Grabbing another cigar from his coat, a simple box adorned with gold as he places another cigar between his lips, lighting it. That addicting taste of tobacco that he craves every waking moment. The crown of her head moves, as she opens the box so seductively, her fingers gently tugging, pulling, her lips parting to softly gasp as the bag opens up. Grabbing a box, she sets the satchel down on the ground gently, opening it with a black lighter with some silver accents. Lighting up his cigar and holding the lighter palm up to offer it to him. Raising his eyebrow, she places it right on his knee, something so casual, yet different. Another item she pulls out, a simple fabric that she runs through her fingers, finally letting it stop on her palm, a silk pale yellow sash that she folds, paying attention to her fingers with every pinch she does with the silk. Standing up, she leans closely, but he doesn’t falter, staring at her face as she moves, steadily breathing to breathe in the familiar scent of his, but that hint of roses twinged his nose. Her arms wrapped around his neck, feeling the sash go around his neck as she tied it. There was a small mark on her upper arm that he definitely did not see earlier, she was trembling, typical of this fragile thing to fear him. He really thought she was different.

“I think it suits you,” her hand tying it and tucking it into his dress shirt, then moving some loose bangs behind his ear. Making sure he was uniform, yet he didn’t protest, no one dared to touch him without asking. Her smile was soft, but he was done with her kissing his ass.

“A'right, what do you want?” Grabbing her wrist with force as her nails trail his sideburns. Her eyebrows arched in question, it irked him that she was toying with him at this point. “If you fear me, then leave me, no need to do such trivial things.” A chuckle, a laugh, it was brighter than the sun above, it was more refreshing than water, his lips felt dry.

“Me? Fear you?” The trembling in her body was no more, he could feel her steady pulse through his palm. “I am smitten with you, it’s only normal for me to follow you with my heart instead of fear.” His grip softened, looking at that wound on her upper arm, it was fresh. His hand grasping her wrist, trailed up to touch it, it was wet, deep, warm, twitching under his touch, he could see fear flash in her eyes.

“Who?” Silence, her demeanor did a complete 180, her eyes darting around. “Tell me the true reason why you are here,” running his thumb over the wound, smearing the blood, but seeing if it pained her. She didn’t speak, getting up to put his hook under her chin, the sash fluttering to the floor, the lighter clattering and opening on the rocksand, tilting her head up. “Stand,” moving immediately to his calling, making her meet his cold eyes that even marines feared. “I said, who?”

“T-the marines sir. They killed my village.” “So you seek a criminal?” Scoffing, it was like a contract with the sandman, an evil that no one wanted, yet she seeked it. “You do know I can crush you easily, dispose of you where no one could ever find you.” Relaxing into his touch, she leaned forward, letting her body lean against his torso, her breath making his abs feel hot. 

“The marines killed with no purpose, they pillage for money-”

“As do I,” growling to see her weak explanation as to why.

“Sir…” her face didn’t move, her nose pressed against his abs, without realizing his hand wrapped around her shoulder to hold her in place. “Though you seem to have everything, it seems you do some things because you still don’t want to lose some companions. Marines still hire anyone, yet you pick out people you want by your side.” Her skin was soft on her shoulder, he wanted to dig his fingers into her shoulder to see her reaction, but part of it was stopping him. He didn’t want her to fear him, she wanted asylum, something many did not want before. “If the marines are corrupt enough to hire pirates to do their dirty work…” He could see her eyes open, her jaw gently resting on his body, her lips peeking into a smile as her lashes opened and closed to keep her tears from pouring out. “Pirates are just doing things to survive, yet you aren’t a savage, you have your reasons for keeping the people you have.” 

“Okay lil’ doll, but how do you know I won’t get rid of you like the marines did?”

“Because, you looked at me and let me in here. The marines…they didn’t even look at anyone when they were killed, they feared their leader and feared for their own survival.” Those words sent shivers down their spine. Was that how his underlings viewed him? It made him smile unexpectedly, turning quickly into a frown. Crocodile took a deep breath in, letting the cigar taste burn his throat, letting that taste linger as long as he could. “Plus, maybe we can shake things up a little sir.” Her doe eyes got him, hook line and sinker, literally. Only then did he realize, he was inhaling his cigar at this point, that it was almost a nub already.

“And how on earth would a little fragile doll like you do that?” Her finger curled, beckoning him to come closer. There was something odd, taking orders from someone else, but with her, it felt like first nature, instinct as you will. He leaned in, his face past hers, almost resting on those small shoulders of hers. Her voice is a soft whisper.

“Come closer, I don’t want anyone else to hear,” groaning, he could feel the heat radiation off her cheek onto his cold skin. A wet peck on his cheek, as she stole his nub of a cigar from his lips. Turning, she stole a quick kiss, that warm beckoning smile plastered on her face like a wanted poster. “Maybe I can give you a reason to keep me around, maybe a level head to make sure you aren’t bored like you were earlier.” As if she read him like a book, though this small woman could be easily crushed within his grasp, it felt like she knew him for years, reading his body language, his facial expressions, every groan, rolled eyes, shape of his eyebrows, twisting of his torso, to the angle his face, she knew what he felt. No fear in her heart for him, something that wouldn’t run away from his fingers, being finally careful he wouldn’t break this figure of glass. He stood upright, towering over her, looking at the hole in the ceiling with the sun tinting the sky pink.

“Al’right doll face,” turning his face away to avoid her sunny face. “I’ll work you like a dog.”

“Alright alright Sir, loud and clear,” giggling as she buried her face in his chest, her arms around his waist, hopping back to wave at him, then bowing as she left the room. Things wouldn’t be the same, just maybe he could get used to having something to do, just anticipating that woman’s next move was a mystery in itself, and he was ready to dive in head first, stepping out of bounds just to find out. “Well,” his hand went into his coat to grab his cigar box, only to pull it out and look at it, putting it back into his coat pocket. Glancing at the sash on the floor, hooking the sash with his gold hook, while picking up the black lighter, flickering it on. “Things just got interesting.”

[myf00djournal]

A chronological post run post.

Iiiiiii had a hard hard time man. In hindsight, I always knew our race was at 4pm so perhaps doing long runs at 6am was never going to help but I was so optimistic for cool weather in April. Nope 31 degrees. My worst fear. I was on pace and on the game plan up until around 8km which is when the course went from some shade to full sun. Told my running partner to push on without me which I had to say 5 times before he did listen 😛 I hate holding people back. The rest was an absolute slog. I thought about a DNF. I found a second wind around 13km and settled back into consistent trotting. Got through. They told us at the start the course was 20.5 which was a shame as it was advertised as a HM and then I saw a girl who was about a km ahead of me usually (because everyone we snaked past each other we did cute girl high fives) going in an opposite direction and I said don’t we turn left again? And she said nope the course was actually 18km. What the heck. Look my performance was not my best but I would’ve dragged myself another bit. Crossed the line and kept going with some other die hards who were also trying to make up km but I got to 19.8 and called it. The water station people were like oh we have cleared the course how much longer will you be and I was like you know what I’m done.

I’m annoyed because the organizers have a whole calendar of events and yet they were so shambolic. They delayed the start time, changed the course and then cut off a considerable distance for everyone. Also WHO KNOWS why the run was at 4/4:30pm in western Sydney but that’ll do me.

The 10km started an hour after us and then 5km after that so there was people always out on course but for a big event there was seriously maybe 60 people in each. So many DNS because we are legit flooded at the moment so I guess people couldn’t make it. A few people DNF. I saw the 5km fun run and wish I went in that because the first woman was 28:10 🥹 but I know it’s not about that.

My average km was around 7:30 which isn’t too bad considering I did a lot of walk/jog intervals for about 6km all up but Runna had me working at 6:25-6:30 as my goal which I was on but it really did fall away. My running partner did a great job and held around 6:40 which I am so happy for him.

Maybe next time I should do more than an 8 week training block. What am I saying with next time 🤦🏽‍♀️ haha never let me again please!!!! I just want to be a parkrun girly and maybe 10km???

Best of all Josh surprised me at the start line to see me off ❤️❤️❤️

The end. Also yes enjoy my post run glow - day ones will recognize the mirror. @taoistimmortal thank you for telling me to increase my cals by 500 cos yeah it’s going noice 👌🏻

[mephinomaly]

[TL] BIOHAZARD/Chapter 7

[ This post uses Ois~su ♪ ]

Time: A little over an hour later

Location: In the underground livehouse in the shopping district by Yumenosaki

Kaoru: Welcome in~♪

Koga: ...

Kaoru: Oh? It’s a regular.

Back already? You know, I shouldn’t say this as an employee, but if you keep coming to dodgy places like this, your parents will start to worry~.

Well, whatever. It’s your decision, just don’t sue us when something bad happens, ‘kay?

Koga: Shut up, stop talkin’ t’me like we’re friends. You’re just an employee.

Keito: Do you know Hakaze, Oogami?

Koga: Hakaze? No, don’t know him. You two friends or somethin’?

Keito: No, but we are in the same class. He’s a notorious slacker, and everytime I see him I end up lecturing him about the importance of coming to school.

Kaoru: Ugh, glasses guy’s here too.

Keito: That’s not my name.

Kaoru: Sooorryyyy~, I have a policy of not remembering the name of guys since I’m not interested in them ♪

Anyway… I thought you had a unique face but hmm– oh yeah, you guys were on stage the other day.

You’re friends with Sakuma-san. That’s why you were told to come out here, right?

Keito: …I wouldn’t say we’re friends.

Koga: Huh~? We’re friends on paper, ‘cos we’re a part of Deadmanz~♪

Koga: Grraaaa! I’m pissed~!

There’s so much goin’ on but I can’t even open my own mouth t’speak~! I’m gonna lose it!

Kaoru: O-Oiii~ Koga-kun? Hm, you probably can’t hear me, can you?

Koga: ? Was that, is that you Hakaze-senpai? Where are you?

Kaoru: I’m right here in front of you… Wait, Koga-kun, is that your voice?

Koga: Who else would it be.

Kaoru: Fufu. There’s quite a lot of people here, so why don’t we go talk in the back?

This time, the client is me or more like, this livehouse I work in.

Do you think you guys could help me out with something—

Koga: Oi! So you actually can’t hear me? You’re just gonna ignore me ‘n keep talkin’!?

Kaoru: ...Ohhh~, so that’s what’s happening.

Koga-kun, Koga-kun. Calm down. I think I get it now.

Koga: Huh?

Kaoru: I think that maybe… we’re in some ghost-like state.

Koga: We’re ghosts? But I don’t remember dyin’— Ohhh, not like that?

Kaoru: Mhm. You act like a moron that doesn’t think about anything, but you’re surprisingly quick to catch on, Koga-kun.

Koga: ’Cos I’m always surrounded by people I don’t get. I’ve been able t’train my brain to understand ‘em.

Kaoru: I see, that makes sense ♪

Koga: So we’re dreaming like this ‘cos of the experiment.

In my dream, it was about the past. I’ve somehow been able t’stay semi-conscious.

Kaoru: That’s called lucid dreaming. On top of that, it seems we’re able to still talk to each other.

We can’t interfere with these dreams, but we can still talk from the sidelines.

Like I said earlier, we’ve been ‘turned into ghosts’.

Koga: Hn, that’s a pretty easy explanation to understand.

Ghosts ‘n dead people can’t interfere with reality.

We’ve actually become ‘deadmanz’. Ironic, ain’t it?

Kaoru: This is such a weird experience that I’m starting to enjoy myself.

Koga: Damn, you’re bein’ so positive, happy bastard.

Kaoru: You only live once, so I might as well have a little fun ♪

Well, I can’t say for sure if this’ll be any actual fun yet but…

Hey, Koga-kun. Am I misremembering?

At this time I wasn’t really interested in much so I took a step back, so that might be why I don’t remember a lot about this?

Koga: Huuh? Whaddya mean?

Kaoru: We’re supposed to be reminiscing on the past, right?...Unless I’m remembering wrong, I don’t recall anything like this happening.

I mean, this is basically how it went but, there’s things here that didn’t.

Koga: Huh? But this is what happened. I went t’the livehouse with Hasumi-senpai and–

Ah, you’re right. I don’t feel like I met you then.

I found out you was the manager of the livehouse later on–

Kaoru: Uhuh. They're only small, but there’s a lot of disparities.

Hm, I wonder what they’re trying to show us…?

[ ☆ ]

Chapter 6

Chapter 8

[collecting-stories]

GUTS ch. 1 - All-American B*tch

setting: summer after college

summary: Kiara is home for the summer and back to “the Pogue Life” - chilling on the HMS (new and improved), working shifts at The Wreck, surfing, and trying to keep the biggest secret in her life a secret. But with midsummers looming and her best worst decision threatening to be exposed at every turn, can she really just go back to the way things were?

A/N: When I first heard Guts I immediately thought of Kiara and I’ve had this idea cooking for a while so I’m super excited to finally write it out. This is not a reader-insert; this is Kiara x Rafe and Kiara x JJ. And maybe a little bit of you guys helping to pick the ending…

<- Guts Masterlist | Bad Idea Right? ->

banner by @saradika

"Can you believe Midsummers is this weekend?" Sarah's voice brought Kiara's attention away from her phone but it was JJ taking a seat next to her, the warmth of his arm pressing against her shoulders and his knee bumping against hers, that brought her all the way back to reality. She flipped her phone over in her lap, the screen hot against her exposed thigh, and looked up at Sarah, sitting directly across from her in the 'New and Improved H.M.S Pogue' (as John B had christened the vessel three nights ago when he relieved the new boat to his friends). 

"I can because my mom keeps reminding me," Kiara replied, casting a glance to JJ, "you're not still working it are you?"

"Yeah, why?" He seemed a little miffed at the way she asked, as if she was offering up some backhanded comment. As if she was criticizing the odd jobs he picked up between steady work on the docks. 

"I...just asking," Kiara shrugged, not totally apologetic, "I thought if you weren't, we could go?"

He shook his head, "sorry, tips are too good to pass up. Once Pope goes back to school I'll be roommate less again-"

"You should just move into the Chateau, makes more sense anyway," Sarah interjected. This time it was Sarah on the receiving end of JJ's glare and Kiara couldn't deny she was happy about it. 

There was a chasm between them. Ever since she'd stepped off the ferry at the end of May there had been this great canyon of distance etched into the fabric of her relationship with JJ. She couldn't decide if it was something that she was projecting on to him or if it was all in her head but either way, he just felt different. Moodier. He had less time for all of them except Pope, who he saw on a near 24/7 basis. But even the minutes that he managed to carve out between hours of work and little sleep, she felt like they were sick of each other. Everything they said set the other one off. He asked about a class she'd told him she didn't like and she flipped; she talked about that boss that gave him a hard time and he told her to mind her own business. 

When she left last August for Appalachian State they'd left each other open ended. Just a 'talk soon, I'll miss you' but nothing definitive. No breaking up but no staying together either. JJ wouldn't talk about the relationship with her and she didn't want any hard conversations about the future when she had so many other things on her plate (moving into a dorm room, mostly). So, they didn't talk and they kept not talking. Weeks stretched that she didn't hear from him. She'd FaceTime and he'd text 'talk later' but later was three weeks away and then she had homework or homecoming or club meets. They got busy and they put each other off and now they were trying to pretend that they were still the same as they had been last summer but they didn't know all the steps anymore. What jokes made him laugh, what stories hadn't she heard? Kiara felt like she was looking a stranger sometimes and wondered which one of them would mention it first.

"I like my apartment," JJ finally replied after a prolonged drink of beer. The apartment was on Figure 8, some kook mansion had been subdivided into apartments back in November. JJ had rented one with Pope (while he was home over Thanksgiving) and they decided they'd split rent whenever Pope was home. When he wasn't, the apartment only saw JJ when he was sleeping. It was out of his price range, for a kid who was working double-shifts on fishing boats and odd jobs all over the island, but JJ wanted it. Cause it was a kook place and it was on Figure 8 and it felt miles away from where he grew up, even if it was only a 15 minute drive. 

"Okay, god," Sarah held her hands up in surrender, "sorry I mentioned it."

"I think Pope's working Midsummer's too," Kiara mentioned, turning the conversation toward a neutral topic. "He said Heyward's been having some trouble."

JJ nodded, "I took over the grocery deliveries two months ago, he can't drive the boat with his cataracts. Got them done once and the doctor fucked up...it's been hell."

Kiara looked to the front of the boat, where Pope was steering and talking to John B, "I didn't know Heyward had surgery!" 

The mention of his dad caught Pope's attention and he turned away from the steering wheel to look back at the trio, "he wants to sue, I think he's talking to that law firm by the courthouse, the one with the lion statue out front." 

"They do malpractice a lot," Sarah nodded, "Topper's cousin interned there when she was at UNC." 

JJ moved away from Kiara to grab another beer, the weight of his arm disappearing from her shoulder and taking the sour mood with it, leaving her to flip her phone back over. She shielded the screen from the sun, barely able to see even with the brightness all the way up. Three text notifications that she'd felt buzz against her leg as she was talking. Sarah was fully engrossed in a conversation with Pope now and JJ had joined John B up front, leaving Kiara in her own little world. Just her, her phone, and the person on the other end of her texts. 

She hit the plus sign in the corner and opened her camera, taking a quick, discreet, and terribly angled selfie of her tinged red face and her sweaty roots, wisps of baby hair clinging to her forehead. She hit send without caring whether the image was unflattering (she knew it was) and tapped on the selfie she'd gotten first. 

She looked up for a second, checking her friends' levels of distraction before looking back down at her phone. She wasn't trying to be sneaky or omit any truths but she wasn't sure this was a can of worms worth opening yet. Especially not when this was her summer back on the island and she had been so busy with school work that she had skipped coming home over winter break. But there on her phone, shaded from the sun by her hand, was Rafe Cameron's picture. Smiling, sun-kissed, with his buzz-cut bleached for the summer and that stupid K necklace he had jokingly pickpocketed from the gas station off campus (after they hooked up at a frat party and she swore that they were casual). He was 'surfing' with Topper and Kelce, which translated into hanging around the beach and bullying pogues like they were still in high school. 

Sarah had told her, last July when she mentioned Appalachian State, that Rafe was going there too. It had been an off-hand comment during a day much like this one, and Kiara hadn't thought much about it. Back then, she doubted that her path would ever cross Rafe's and if it did, she would  steer clear. There would be no repeats of high school mistakes. 

But then the party happened. Pike had a massive homecoming party and her dorm mate's boyfriend suggested they all go, swearing it would be a good time. And it was, even after she saw Rafe, leaning against the bannister talking to some girl that looked familiar from her Math 110 class. She'd thought about Sarah and the boat day for a split second- 

("There's like 20,000 people on campus, so all I have to do is keep 19,998 of them between me and Rafe and I'll survive. Besides, going to App means I compromise with my dad by still technically going to UNC but I get to away from them. Out of their house. No more 'Kie, where are you going?' or 'Kie, who are you talking to?' fifty times a day. If I have to see Rafe just to get away from my parents...it's a small price to pay.")

-But then Rafe looked her way and he nodded and he grinned that dumb, crooked smile that had made her feel like she was starring in some 90s rom-com back in 9th grade. She raised her cup at him as if he was actually a friend that she was mildly happy to see and not her arch-nemesis, bully to her (maybe) boyfriend and harasser of her friends (not to mention all the shit with the gold). 

"Sarah said you were here," He was in front of her before she realized that he had ditched whoever-she-was on the stairs. 

"Here, specifically or here, generally?" Kiara asked, looking around the room (primarily to avoid eye-contact and that nagging butterfly feeling she was getting in her stomach. She was tipsy, she had to be, that was the only explanation). 

"Here generally." Rafe replied, narrowing his eyes suspiciously as he took a drink from his own cup. As if he could hear the butterflies in her stomach. As if he knew she wasn't tipsy. 

Who got a crush on their best friend's brother and then kept crushing even after that brother turned out to be a douche? A really hot one, but a douche all the same.

"Well, generally, she told me you would be here too," Kiara replied, "so now we've seen each other. We can...report back to Sarah."

Rafe nodded, reaching in his pocket and grabbing his phone out before holding it up and snapping a picture. Too quickly for Kiara to realize what he was doing, or at least to not look like a flushed deer in headlights. 

"What the fuck?" But it sounded more flustered than angry. 

"For proof of life," Rafe shrugged. "You know, in case Sarah asks."

"I don't think she will," Kiara couldn't stop herself from laughing at him as she reached for his phone, aiming to delete the picture. 

Taller and, in this case, faster than her, Rafe easily moved the phone out of her reach. He took another sip of his drink, peering at her over the rim and she could tell just from the way his eyes crinkled that he was smiling. 

"Seriously, I probably look like a troll in the picture Rafe," Kiara laughed, "delete it."

"On two conditions."

"What are they? And nothing gross okay, I know how your twisted mind works."

"My twisted mind, what are you, a Taylor Swift song? Chill out, Kie," he laughed, "I was just gonna suggest we take this party elsewhere."

"Where, elsewhere?" Kiara asked, taking another look around the room. Her dorm mate had disappeared from sight but she wasn't too concerned. The girl was nice but Kiara wasn't sure they were best friend worthy.  Not someone she wanted to hang with on a regular basis. 

"My place?" Rafe offered raising his eyebrows.

"You want me to go back to your dorm with you?" She asked, the skepticism dripping from her voice, "I don't know if you noticed Rafe, we aren't exactly friends."

Kiara couldn't think of a single time in her life that she had ever even categorized them as friends. Even the year she spent at the kook academy, half of it attached to Sarah at the hip, she would never have considered herself friends with Rafe Cameron. Sure, there was that stretch of four or five months after she first became friends with the kook princess, before the fall out and the rekindling, when she felt like she spent every waking minute at TanneyHill, that she had an obsessive crush on Rafe. But that was short-lived and it felt like it was eons ago. 

Rafe's arm fell across her shoulders as he turned them toward the exit, "come on, Kie, how could you say that?" 

"Oh, I don't know, based on past experiences?"

"Water under the bridge," he shrugged.

They were moving. Kiara was very aware that Rafe was walking her toward the exit and she was willing letting him. She did a self-check, running it through in her head to figure out if she was willing walking toward the exit because she wanted to or she felt like she had to and coming to the conclusion that it was the first of the two options. The party was fun, loud, the drinks were good, but there was something she'd been feeling like she was missing. Not just tonight but since she got to Appalachian State, since she set up her side of her dorm room and settled into classes. She couldn't ignore the way she was feeling a little lost, disconnected from her old life and her old self. 

Kiara would've been lying if she said that she hadn't always felt like maybe there was something missing from her life. The most like herself she'd ever felt were those months after she and Sarah rekindled their friendship, when she got could be as kook as she wanted and still feel like a pogue. With everyone else she felt like she was wearing a mask. She had to be pogue enough for JJ, John B, and Pope, had to be kook enough to hack it at school, had to be what her parents wanted and they always wanted different things. Her mom wanted that polished, sweet, society girl that she had been when she was Kiara's age and her dad wanted that fun kid that went surfing with him, loved working at The Wreck and wasn't interested in dating or parties. It was always something else for someone else.

But now, as she walked across the courtyard with Rafe, he seemed like such an outlier.

"What exactly do you want?"

"What do you mean?" He asked. 

"I just mean like, we're not friends, so-" 

"This again?" He almost laughed, "chill Kiara, I thought you pogues were supposed to be easygoing." 

"I am easygoing," she insisted, "I just wanna know why you want to hang out with me."

"We used to hang out."

Kiara shot him a skeptical look, "we," she motioned between the two of them, "have never hung out. And don't list any of the times I hung out with Sarah and you were there cause that doesn't count."

"I definitely think that counts," he replied, pushing the door open to the dorm building. 

Kiara ducked in under his arm, tossing her cup out in the trashcan nearby. "So, what nefarious thing did you get me back here to do?" She joked, following Rafe down the hall to his dorm room.

"I just thought we could hang," he replied, pausing outside his door and turning back to look at her, that cheshire cat grin that made her stomach do somersaults present, "but I'm up for whatever."

"Don't push your luck Cameron."

As it turned out, Kiara's eagerness to blow off steam and her school-girl crush on Rafe was enough. They watched some D-list movie on Netflix and talked shit on their parents and did shots of vodka from the bottle Rafe had under his bed and before she knew it she was kissing him. And maybe, definitely, there should have been some voices in her head telling her that this was not such a good idea (and all of those voices should have belonged to her friends) but she couldn't bring herself to care because kissing Rafe Cameron, (hell, sleeping with Rafe Cameron) felt right. It felt like all the shit that she put up with from everyone else demanding something from her just fell away and she was herself and somebody liked her that way. Liked her not as a perception of who they wanted her to be, not as the hippie-chick, girl-next-door, kook-turned-pogue, but just as Kiara. (But then again, maybe she was just drunk from the vodka and maybe Rafe just felt really good).

"Earth to Kie!" Sarah's voice brought her back down to reality, back to the HMS pogue and she looked up from her phone, from Rafe's text, to see Sarah waving her hand. 

"Sorry, zoned out," Kiara shook her head, "what's up?"

"I was just asking if you had your dress," Sarah replied, "I wanna go to Chapel Hill tomorrow to shop, figured we could go together." 

"Sounds good...I know what my mom wants me to wear but I don't know what I'm actually wearing," Kiara replied. She had mentioned midsummers to Rafe a few days ago when they were talking and he'd told her to wear something blue. It was his favorite color and he always swore she looked good in it, though she was sure he was biased. Still, she'd been window-shopping for something blue ever since, ignoring the floral applicate dress her mom had picked up before she'd even come home for the summer. 

"Ooo, a Chapel Hill trip?" JJ asked, stepping back into the their space and sitting down beside Kiara again. She flipped her phone over, ghost face looking up at her with cartoon pink hearts on his cheeks. 

"You aren't invited," Sarah laughed, "it's a girls' day."

"Lame," he stuck his tongue out at her and tossed her empty beer can at him in response. 

"They'll crash anyway," Kiara pointed out. JJ's mood had picked up substantially since earlier. Whatever had perked him up, it was Kiara but she was thankful for it. 

"We will," he agreed, leaning in close to her. She took a drink of her own beer, avoiding having to meet his eyes. He was undeterred, his attention already on inviting the others as he called Pope and John B's attentions. 

Kiara bit her tongue before she said something that pissed him, or everyone, off. She didn't care so much about going to Chapel Hill with Sarah but everyone else? She knew she should be happy to see her friends, her pogues, but it was every day and maybe that had been fine before, last summer, but this summer...this summer she just wanted to have her time. She didn't want these day after day hangs in the boat or at the Chateau or them hovering around The Wreck. 

"Chapel Hill?" Pope asked, looking between the three. 

"Yeah, haven't you always wanted to help us pick out dresses?" Kiara replied, rolling her eyes.

"It'll be fun!" Sarah replied, waving her off, "Kie's spent too much time in the sun, it's making her cranky."

"She's always a bitch," JJ muttered, taking a drink as he leaned back. Kiara whacked his stomach, making him sputter and jerk forward. "What the fuck?"

"Don't call me a bitch JJ."

"Don't act like one."

"Hey!" Sarah glared at both of them, mom voice on, "chill, both of you. Jesus, I'm trying to have a nice time okay...you guys have both been bitches all fucking day."

Kiara slumped down on the bench, "sorry, my mom was just getting to me this morning and it just...put me in a shitty mood." 

"Well un-shitty mood yourself babe," Sarah replied, "I wanna have a fun fucking day."

[erikiara80]

It intrigues me that, even tho Will is not in the lab with El the day of the massacre, many seem to connect him to that day.

Like his parallels with Brenner opening the RR door, and the parallels between the lab scenes and Rink-o-mania.

He's also been associated with 12 and 6 since S1, and in the Nina scenes there are many mentions of those numbers. Now, thanks to The First Shadow, we know that Henry vanished for twelve hours when he was a kid, that he was a fan of Captain Midnight and used the captain's clock as a code for his journal. So, one could say that 12 is associated with him. But there's the name Williams on the grandfather clock, so 12 is "Will's number" too lol

The only tattoes we see in the flashback of the massacre are Seven's and Five's. 7+5=12. The first kids who "play the circle game" are Two and Six. If you leave your circle- timeline?- you lose

There are also mentions of artists, dogs, working out of sheds and building things (like Castle Byers). And I keep thinking about a specific parallel between Ten and Brenner and Will and El in 4x01.

Lab scene: Dr ELlis, Six, Brenner and Ten, whose favorite toy is the Magic 8 Ball -> Kali, mentioned by Henry, and the only one who can project illusions. That's why I think 10 stands for 01, here.

Moments later, we get these lines: 'Lessons with Six. Six is trying to move a block. A red block'. Six, six. Twelve.

Who was building a tower with red blocks in the RR, and picked up the crayons. Two boxes

School scene: El and Will (and girl in black behind him)

82-> 8+2=10. Also, door clanging, hm

There are also two extras here that, imo, stand for Eddie and Henry. Like, "Edward Creel" and Henry. A hint at different timelines? Maybe this is why in Nina there are two different groups of lab kids and Will is in this parallel, even tho we don't see him in the lab?

As for duffel bag guy, I think he stands for Henry because, white outfit, and because duffel bag guy in S3. This is what Dustin says about how a russian spy should look like: Tall, blonde, not smiling. Basically, Henry (well, sometimes he does smile)

I have too many drafts about the school scenes, lol. About the two girls in pink, the Tesla visual aid as a hint at a tear in time and space in 1976 (connected to another hint in S3, the lifeguard's line about water and getting electrocuted, with Happy Birthday and '76 on the poster behind him). AND the teacher that looks like Mr Clarke. But that's for another post. Or ten.

Anyway, back to the parallels.

Why is Will included in this parallel, and paralleled to Brenner opening the RR door? Not sure, but it's interesting. Maybe Will is associated with opening doors/gates because of the car crash in the past (if my theory is correct, of course) or maybe because, if there's a timeloop, in other timeline he's the one who banished the Brenner we see in Dimension X, in a parallel to El banishing Henry. This is not a theory tho. Just a thought.

Would you be so kind and open the door? Twelve is kind, like Will. Interesting that Brenner doesn't say that to Seventeen, he just asks him to open the door.

And why does Ten say that both Ellis and Six (El and Will) are dead? Well, I think THIS might be a hint at what happened in 1976, because we also hear gunshots. The car chase, the accident, the lake...

Another thing that seems to connect Will to El's past is an extra who looks like him. The kid with the word HELL on the t-shirt. We first see him when El says that she will soon see Mike (One)

Then we see him next to Will and El, and when Angela and her friends step on El's diorama, a parallel with Two bullying her. Hell, chess game, and the kid even looks at Will.

Like, let's make it clear that this extra stands for Will and connects him to things he supposedly shouldn't be connected to.

Hell and Angela. Yeah, Rink-o-mania, another parallel with Nina

The way they used this extra reminds me of a scene in 2x01. @chirpsythismorning noticed a boy with a bowl cut who just looks like Will. When Will hears a noise tho, before the vision, magically, bowl cut boy is gone. Now there's a kid with a buzz cut. But the other extra is the same girl, so I think this is intentional. And in this scene they mention a sister, Mike's sister, in... an interesting way (I won't prostitute my sister!)

Is it you? No, Will, that kid is you. And the one with the buzz cut? Maybe he stands for Henry, or maybe this is a hint, like the article in S1, that when he was a child, Will was in the lab, too, for a week.

One more crazy detail. The Russia storyline is a big parallel to the lab scenes, and during their "last meal" (at Suzie's, Will is in front of Leonardo's Last Supper) one of the prisoners says this, about the Demogorgon, before the other massacre of S4:

I have been in this place for a week. My first night I saw six men enter this room. Six.

Enter this room. Like Brenner entering the RR, or Will opening the door at school. Or maybe, another type of door.

[that-was-anticlimactic]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by my beloved @zukkaoru & @lesmiserablol <333

tagging (with no pressure): @beachytablecloth, @fabro-de-omres, & @milf-harrington (so sorry if you've already been tagged!)

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

69 which... is honestly more than i was expecting? i think it helps that my goal is to post a fic once a month mostly bc that's my motivation to keep writing even when i'm busy/stressed!

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

396,183 - omg i am SO CLOSE to 400k ahhhhhhhhh

3. what fandoms do you write for?

uhhhhhhh many??? right now, it's a lot of bsd/bnha, but it's always a plethora of things, haha! my first was prolly ninjago tbh

4. what are your top five fics by kudos?

hey, little songbird, give me a song

you never quite say (but i hear)

lost in love and lost in feelings

Deeper Than Words

for a new world to begin, the old one must fall

okay the #1 for that is honestly so real that is one of my absolute favorite things i've written EVER lol, same with #2! the rest are... idk #4 is AWFUL - like one of my first atla fics and also my first time writing a ts fic (i have gotten SO MUCH BETTER AT IT NOW)

*note: i started this in like nov or early dec, and #5 changed! it was the zukka goose fic but now it's actually one of my favorites iugytfyhujiko

5. do you respond to comments

i used to be good at it. then i got stressed bc of school. and then i was suddenly like "uhhhh idk How to respond???" i think the thing that got me was i didn't know how to reply to the distressed comments on my sokka falling fic so i just. accidentally stopped.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

oh here in the garden (let's play a game) 100% rip to sokka sorry babes ilysm hate to do it to ya, love the angst tho <333 rip to everyone who missed the major character death tag lol. well... that or a spring and summer song, too brief rip to geto in the +1 oops... oh shoot... it could also be take me where my soul can run... hm...

7. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

this was hard, but imma go with i was a child and she was a child bc it's based on one of my favorite childhood memories! rip to zuko and his ice cream tho :/ but azula is VIBING the whole time oiuygfcgyhuij

8. do you get hate on fics?

not really? i did once have someone try to correct me and say that i wrote sokka with ocd instead of tourette's but it was in the bookmarks and it made me laugh lol. i also got this comment on my kubokai kaidou with ts fic: ".. the self projection is heavy in this one ... -_-" so idk if that counts lol

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

nope :)

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written?

uhhhh not really? i wrote ninjago equestria girls crossover oneshot in middle school but i never finished it and it SUCKED lol

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of?

12. what's the longest you've spent working on a fic? and the shortest?

uhhh i wrote a 7,600 word fic in three hours while i had covid? that's prolly the shortest? i count that as shorter than anything i may have finished faster bc i had covid lol but longest? ummmm over a year? multiple years? idkkkkkk the jay with ts fic i posted was something i wrote in 2019 and i edited it (a lot) and posted it in 2022 so??? that maybe?

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

uhhh i did with friends in middle/high school, but those never left the docs! also grace and i have. very many much so aus lol

14. what's your all-time favorite ship? from all fandoms?

RARIJACK!!! it was one of my first hardcore ships, and also was my introduction to queer ships!!! renga is a close second, but rarijack just is really important and special to me for sentimental reasons that put it above renga and others! i am also on a seroroki kick right now. it's not my all-time favorite, but the brain rot seems never ending right now lol

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

GOD SO MANY i have a folder in gdocs just for ninjago fics and there are folders within the folder for different types of wips i'll never finish - i have That many: "no substance", "baby girls", "drafts"... etc...

16. what are your writing strengths?

uhhhhhhhhhh ngl i'm in a place right now where i feel like the answer is Nothing (writer's block has been Bad recently), but i think something i'm good at in a very specific way is making readers feel the discomfort of characters? like idk i've been told that the way i write ts and tics (specifically tic attacks) makes the readers feel uncomfortable in like a "wow i didn't know it felt this way" kind of way??? i like to think i'm good at characterization??? idkkkk

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

ummm setting and scenery & connecting parts of a story, especially if they're parts that i'm stuck on/transitions are prolly my biggest ones???

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i mean go for it as long as it's respectful and like... you tried making sure it's accurate?

19. first fandom you wrote for?

uhh rainbow fairy/a-z mysteries... but that was like very briefly on paper. first time like... for Realsies was ninjago

20. favorite fic you've written?

oh 100% hey, little songbird, give me a song. it's just really special to me and writing it helped me cope with a new tic i had. but one that i wrote more recently is fantasies i'm not sure that i'm worthy of which is a ritsu-centric fic and is prolly tied as my favorite fic i wrote in 2023. the other one would be sun comes streaming through the window (& i can't sleep anymore) which is my 21k word kenji-centric fic lol but that one is like... i'm more proud of it than anything, which is what puts it up there.

[pebblysand]

hello,

I cannot begin to tell you how much castles meant to me, and what a privilege it has been to follow it these past few years. When I finished chapter 24 I was surprised to find that I was experiencing a small bit of grief that the story is over and I’m only a fan I can’t imagine what it’s like for you!

Now that you wrapped up the story I was wondering if you would like to reveal what your original five chapter outline entailed, how it grew, what surprised you while writing the fic, and what, if any, plot lines or themes you wished to explore but didn’t get the chance to write into the story.

Again thank you so much for writing castles and I’m hoping you’re enjoying a well deserved rest.

aw, thank you so, so much for this message anon. the grief is REAL haha! although, for me, i think i had a bit more time to get used to the idea as i was writing (i also knew when/how i wanted to end, etc.) so that has relieved it a bit. i'm also insanely happy about finishing so it's very complicated, messing feelings haha! that said, i've been getting so many sweet comments and DMs lately, i truly hadn't realised/allowed myself to see how many people were reading this fic and just seeing now how much it meant to everyone is honestly the best gift and reward i could ever have imagined (and the best present for my birthday week haha!). thank you all SO MUCH, really!

so in terms of your questions...

I was wondering if you would like to reveal what your original five chapter outline entailed, how it grew...

at the beginning, i didn't really have a precise "outline" for the five chapters, it was more of a general idea. the first thing that "came" to me was actually two one-shots:

what ended up being chapter one - a directly post-war dreamy blur-like story (a lot of which i already had cause i'd started and stopped writing one a number of times)

the end (aka the four questions from the four kids and lily renovating godric's hollow, with the end scene being harry going in for the first time)

at the very start, they were two independent stories. one was about the post-war era and the other was about generational trauma/the impact of the war on next gen. then, i was sort of thinking about war and the latter, and the next thing that came was the 9/11-Iraq chapter (chapter 19). i was like, 'hm, maybe i could make this a series about war'. so it became this thing of almost "war throughout the ages" where the first instalment would be directly post-war, then 9/11, then next gen. this was what i landed on over the first few hours of thinking about it, in august 2020.

then i had the idea of the "poem" (i.e. the chapter titles). and i realised that if i wanted to make it work, i'd probably have to do 5/6 chapters for the poem to work. so i started thinking maybe i could do a bit more hinny/rebuilding lore, with a lose plan of a hinny break up, then resolution when they finally talked, which is basically where i was when i really started putting together chapter 1 and when i published it.

after that, the story sort of grew out of... boredom. in the first place. i got laid off my job because of covid and was studying for law exams and just... procrastinated lol. that's sort of how you got the first 6/7 chapters, giulia, mia, etc. i just sort of kept growing the universe as i wrote it. then, obviously, chapter 8 happened.

i've talked about it before but chapter 8 wasn't planned. in the way that: did i always have the idea that "this is how wars are fought" and that ginny could have been abused? yes, definitely. but i was initially determined not to go there, ended up changing my mind and going there, and that was obviously a decision that had a massive impact on the story itself. what was going to be basically two chapters of harry and ginny talking and getting back together, became a 200,000 words subplot, almost. i think at the time 1) i was still unemployed and didn't mind adding more to my plate as i had nothing else to do and 2) i didn't quite realise what i was taking on. i don't regret it, don't get me wrong, but it made the story a lot longer than i had planned.

around that time (i think a little later), i finally had the idea of lily going to war. as i said above, i had always known how the fic would end with her renovating godric's hollow as the last "castle" (and i always the question she would be asking: "what was the hardest thing?" "having you") but i had never quite figured out why she was asking that, and why she was renovating the house. and then i will always remember: i was at home in nice, walking pebblydog in the evening, and this song by passenger came up in my spotify. i'd heard it before but didn't know it well but i suddenly got hit by this vision of: lily, in a war, getting into a car accident. and then it was just... there. like, unavoidable. it made so much sense.

i had already read a fic (for the life of me, i can't find it now, if anyone has it, feel free to link it below) of lily joining the british army. it was a very different context/story (and a very short one shot) but it probably had percolated in my head. but after having written chapter 8, it made So Much Sense. the recurrence of war. the thing about the price women specifically pay in wars, ect. i also think that the internet is FILLED with next gen fics about albus and james, but lily is almost always ignored. so i suppose she naturally became the one who interested me the most.

i think once i had that, very little changed throughout the story. it was mostly just writing and adding to the world, building towards what i knew would be the end. i also initially had had the idea for the harry/hermione fight and a lot of the storyline around her life as a politician/minister for the hermione one shot i was writing at the time, and a lot of that actually ended up in castles. i did add the abortion story after roe. but that was pretty much it.

so anyway, in a very condensed way, this is how it grew and became a 400,000 words monster lol.

what surprised you while writing the fic

honestly, the success it got. i've talked about this a thousand times before so i won't reinvent the wheel but i come from very small fandoms were getting 50 kudos makes you top 10 fics of all time lol. i am immensely honoured and baffled and grateful that so many people have read and connected with this story. it's honestly been beyond my wildest dreams. it obviously comes as a pendent of a sometimes very odd and rather conflictual HP fandom, which is also surprising coming from smaller communities, but mostly, it's been an incredibly positive experience!

what, if any, plot lines or themes you wished to explore but didn’t get the chance to write into the story.

and yeah, so i've already talked about this but i really wanted to have a plotline with harry and dudley sort of reconciling (or at least getting on better terms/talking) but i could never quite find a good spot for it. perhaps had roe not happened, it could have worked in chapter 18 but the abortion storyline seemed more important to me. and again, i kind of also like that it didn't get resolved? like some things just don't resolve in life, yk?

anyway, i'll stop here cause it's already a very long post, but thank you for your questions and for your kind words anon, i truly, truly appreciate it!

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #1072: Anime Binging Night (Epithet Erased)

8:45 p.m. at STEM's Headquarters' Living Room.......

Yoomtah: (Smiles Brightly at her Boyfriend Beside Her) Alrightly then, Naven!~ What sort of anime you wanna binge through tonight that isn't One Piece related? Shonen, gorey, slice of life....(Gives Naven a Seductive Look on her Face) Maybe something more explicit to spice up the room if you know what I'm saying~ (Starts Moving her Eyebrows Up and Down)

Naven: (Smiles Sheepishly) H-How about we watch some more light-hearted this evening. Like that lovely Spy x Family show. I never had the chance to watch for myself as of late, but I have heard great things about from peers.

Yoomtah: Oh yeah, that show is a banger. And hella cute to boot, you'll love it!

Naven: I wouldn't deny that possibility. It'll be nice to take my mind off of things for once. Especially everything work related.

Yoomtah: Hell. YES! I am so tired of doing people's paperwork 24/7!!

Naven: You and me both, my dear. But at least we have the night to ourselves. Do you think Mr. Shades will be alright with the girls this evening?

Yoomtah: Oh he'll be fine! Our Ricky-Poo is a very strong wizard boi after all.

Naven: (Starta Snickering a Bit) Ricky-Poo?

Yoomtah: It's a nickname I came up for him. He calla me Yoomy all the time, which I for one adored a lot, so why not give him one of his own, you know?

Naven: I think it sounds lovely.

Yoomtah: Thank you!~ But enough about nicknames! Let's just focus on you, me.....(Hugs Naven While Having a Blanket Covering Around Them) And nthe nightly hours of cuddles you owed me~ (Starts Kissing Up on Naven's Cheeks)

Naven: (Chuckles Ticklishly by Yoomtah's Affectionate Kisses) Yes, yes~ Let's commence anime binging night, shall we?

A Few Episodes of Spy X Family Later.......

TV: LOIDDDYYYYYYYYYYY

Yoomtah: Hey, Naven?

Naven: Hm?

Yoomtah: Are you.....still thinking about that Molly kid in any way? You would always get sad whenever her name get brought up in any conversations. (Gently Pokes at Naven's Cheek) You're even making that cute frowny face every time something's bother you, which is pretty easy to tell if you ask me.

Naven: (Frowns While Sighing) Well....I suppose your observation of me isn't....too far fetched I'm afraid.

Yoomtah: (Softly Snuggles onto Naven) You wanna talk about it? I'm a fairly decent listener.

Naven: (Chuckles Very Lightly) You're a wonderful listener, dear. (Slowly Went Back to Frowning) But to answer your question, I have been thinking about Ms. Bylndeff as of late and thinking if.....not taking here with me was ever the best decision on my part, especially after everything that happened on that day.....

Yoomtah: You mean that whole dream bubble fiasco?

Naven: The very same, yes. I always figured she would trouble in her home life recently, but to witness how problematic it truly was at first hand....('Sigh') Well, I guess I can't say I know how to describe it really......

Yoomtah: Crappy, sucky, guilt-writtenny

Naven: The last one's not even a real compound word and I still find it accurate to my current feelings to the situation. I really wish I could be of more help to her on that day, but I knew I couldn't just....adopt her right off the bat. Especially given the excruciating work hours I have recently and the potential rumors journalists and the paparazzi would spread.....

Yoomtah: (Groans While Rolling her Eyes in Pure Annoyance) Ohhhh God don't even get me STARTED on those......Yesterday, some wise guy from the Sweet Jazz News Daily made a two page article on how you're completely out of the league you are to me and that I'm only dating you for money. Like.....THE HELL DO THEY MEAN YOU'RE OUT OF MY LEAGUE!? You're way more of a man than any of these brain dead morons would even try and DREAM of being! And did they REALLY think I would be that shallow enough to date you only for your riches? BULLSHIT! My limo driving career is paying me enough already, I ain't a shaneless gold digger! I swear, if I see ONE MORE journalist, paparazzi, or who the fucks starts getting into our business again, I am going to find myself a bat and shove it SO FAR UP THEIR-

Naven: Yoomie Dear....remember our anger management sessions and not raising your stress levels high.

Yoomtah: I AM CALM DAMNIT!

Yoomtah starts whimpering like a sick puppy as Naven soothes her anger away with his gently comfort and embrace.

Naven: There, there. It's alright. I agree with every word you said.

Yoomtah: (Looks Up at Naven With Sparkling Eyes) You do?~ Truly?~

Naven: (Chuckles Lightly) Of course. Molly is a timid girl and the last thing I want for her is to deal with these kind of nonsense on a daily basis, among other things.

Yoomtah: Yeah, I hear ya.....You said she was taken away by that Vincent Murder guy before I arrived at the toy store that night?

Naven: That's correct. Despite the name and villainous demeanor, he seems like a nice, passionate fello once you get to know him a little. Molly seems to hold him in high regards due to him being her boss in some capacity.

Yoomtah: Really now? So like what? Is he gonna try and look after her or something?

Naven: Given the care and support he gave her during that time, I'd say the possibility of that is above average. (Grabs his Chin While Thinking) Perhaps I could arrange a lunch date for the three of us sometime in the future....(Turns Back to Yoomtah) You're more than welcome to join us, dear.

Yoomtah: Hmm...Tempting, but I'm probably gonna have pass on that offer. I feel like I would get bored too easily in these kinds of meet ups, ya know?

Naven: Very well. The offer still stands if you ever decide to chance your mind.

Yoomtah: You got it. ('Sigh') But listen, Navey, you can't let what happened that day keep you down forever. That little girl still looks up to you despite everything, right?

Naven: Well, I mean....I suppose so, but-

Yoomtah: And does she feel any sort of malice or resentment towards you in anyway?

Naven: Well, no, not really, bu-

Yoomtah: Then you got nothing to worry about, bug doof!~ You may never be an ideal parental guardian, but that doesn't change the fact that you're still her teacher. And you and i know damn well that a teacher's job is to educate and guide them into being decent citizens of an overly obnoxious society.

Naven: (Smiles Sheepishly) I wouldn't exactly say that they're all obnoxious. But you're right. It won't do me any good if I keep dwelling on the incident any further. I will do better as a teacher and mentor for now on, that, I can promise you.

Yoomtah: (Happily Snuggles onto Naven Some More) That's the spirit, Navey!~ You're making your cute girlfriend proud here!~

Naven: Oh I wouldn't say you're cute exactly. You're more of the line if being beautiful and breath-taking all things considered.

Yoomtah: (Snorts in Laughter) I'm really flattered, babe!~ But I am FAR from being the most beautiful girl out there.

Naven: (Smiles Softly) Perhaps to some, but I beg to differ. (Gives Yoomtah a Kiss on the Forehead) It's one of the many reasons why I love you after all.

Yoomtah's heart flutters like a sound of a roaring car engine being turned on for the first time in minutes, as she begins to kiss all over her boyfriend's face again in a cuddling position. As surprising as the sudden affection was, Naven was more than happy to welcome it given how stressful today truly was for him earlier.

@aprilbrowines

@cyber-wildcat

[impishtubist]

20 QUESTIONS FOR FIC WRITERS

I was tagged by seven of you (!!!) so here are my answers. Consider this an open tag, I have no idea who hasn't done this yet.

---

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

222 if you don't count the hidden ones, 245 if you do.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

1.5 million (this does count the hidden ones because I'm too lazy to go subtract them from the total).

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently HP and Good Omens, but I've written for 16 fandoms over the years, and you never know which one I'll go back to.

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

-Finding Home (no longer available)

-the spaces between

-Da Capo (no longer available)

-Courtship Rituals (no longer available)

-quicken to the new life (no longer available)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Sometimes. I go through fits and spurts of either responding to every single comment, or responding to none. It doesn't mean I don't appreciate comments! But I'm already writing and posting fics for free, and responding to every comment is something that I don't always have the time or mental space for.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Fuck, idk. I don't know what's angst and what isn't. The Fall of Gods, maybe.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I write a lot of fluff, actually! Idk how I got a reputation as an angst writer, smh. The Trouble With Quidditch is pretty fluffy.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Oh, sure. But it gets deleted.

9. Do you write smut?

Begrudgingly. It's extremely demoralizing as a writer to know that the only way a fic is going to get attention is if you put smut in it, so I do it sometimes just for the kudos/comments. But I hate every second of writing it.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Yep. I've done a HP/GO one, and some cracky Sherlock/Star Trek ones, and probably a few others I can't remember.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yep, several of them into different languages.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! @allcanonisrelative is probably the person I've written with the most, but I've written with others as well.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

This changes by the hour so I literally can't answer this question. Maybe Aziraphale/Crowley?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

Hm, I have a few unfinished fics on AO3, but I've already admitted that those won't be finished. I have a Sirius/Bellatrix + Sirius/Remus fic in my drafts folder that it would be nice to finish someday, but that will have to wait until I feel like writing Wolfstar again (which will probably be never, thanks to the Remus apologists).

16. What are your writing strengths?

None.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Everything.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

Well, I know that it used to be standard that you would italicize it, and now you're not supposed to do that, so I no longer do. I also think that you shouldn't translate it! Especially not right there in the same line on the fic. If you're writing dialogue in another language, context clues should tell us enough about what the characters are saying that translation isn't needed.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star Trek: TNG.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I never like anything I write, so idk. Price of Memory, maybe, because that one was at least a lot of fun to write.

[deus-ex-mona]

LIPxLIP and the Filming of the New Year’s Special Programme: Epilogue

this is totally chapter 8 guys

previous part (chapter 7)

A few days later—

Aizo: If we’d been able to race the other day, I’d have won it for sure.

Yujiro: You’re still going on about that? Dragging this out forever only makes you look stupid, no?

Aizo: Hey…!

Yujiro: Maybe it was fortunate that Manager Uchida stopped us, hm? We were able to end things without any tears from a certain idiot.

Aizo: Sh-shut up! Just how are you so damn confident when your body is so flimsy?!

After the livestream that day—

The two of them had tried to embark on their voluntary long-distance race, only to be stopped in their tracks by Manager Uchida.

Yujiro: (Hmm… I’m just as bothered by it as he is, so he really has no need to whine about it to me.)

Aizo: If we get to participate in the special programme again next year, we’ll definitely settle this once and for all!

Aizo: If I’d known that I’d end up feeling this annoyed, I would’ve just left you there and reached the goal on my own.

Yujiro: Well, you’d probably get booed a ton when you reached the studio, no?

Aizo: Yeah, I know! That’s exactly why I hate it so much!

Aizo: What’s with all the jokes about “LIPxLIP’s friendship”, dammit?! I don’t want such a thing at all!

Aizo: I even declared to the Gods back at the shrine that I was gonna win too…

Yujiro: (That’s my line. But…)

Yujiro: (It looks like it’s going to be a solo competition, so of course I’ll have my own share of highlights…)

Yujiro: (But please allow Aizo to show off his best points too.)

Yujiro: (Please let the programme be one that can be enjoyed by…every single one of the viewers from across the country.)

Yujiro: But my other wish came true, so I guess it’s fine…

Yujiro: What we want to see are the smiles on our Julietas’ faces, after all.

Aizo: …Huh? What other wish did you wish for?

Yujiro: (Oh shoot… Did I say that aloud?!)

As Yujiro snapped his mouth shut in a panic, a nasty smile spread across Aizo’s lips.

Aizo: My, oh my? You realised from the start that you were gonna lose to me, and chickened out, didn’t you?

Aizo: You prayed for stuff like the success of the programme, and for there to be smiles on our Julietas’ faces, amirite?

Yujiro: Sh… shut it! It’s only natural for a pro to think about the programme he’s going to participate in, as well as his audience, right?

Aizo: Well, I’m in the same boat, though.

Yujiro: …Eh?

Aizo: Of course I told the Gods “I wanna beat Yujiro!”, but…

Aizo: What I actually wished for was “Please allow the two of us to bring excitement to the programme”. 

Yujiro: Wha…

Yujiro: (That’s… similar to what I wished for.)

Aizo: Well, I already knew that variety shows were my forte, though!

Aizo: But that programme was a job for LIPxLIP, so we had to get you the chance to show your stuff too… right?

Yujiro: …Did you really have to add that last part?

Yujiro: (So it turns out that… both of us were thinking about the same thing after all.)

Yujiro: (The thought that I’m similar to a guy like him is kind of frustrating, but… maybe that’s why the programme turned out the way it did.)

Yujiro recalled feeling a different sense of accomplishment when they had reached the goal at the same time, than the feeling of fulfilment that he would get after a live performance.

Yujiro: …And that’s the end of our idle conversation. Let’s hurry up and resume our independent practice.

Yujiro: We’re going over the choreography for our Valentine’s Day live, aren’t we?

Aizo: Yeah, that goes without say.

Following that, Yujiro resumed his independent dance practice session with Aizo.

Aizo: I heard that the upcoming live will be on a circular stage, so let’s perform a move that’ll allow us to see all 360 degrees around—

Yujiro: How about when we’re standing back to back? And then, when we get to the interlude—

Aizo: Ah, that sounds really good. Let’s suggest it to our dance teacher.

Yujiro: And also, when we get to this song—

Their independent practice session lasted well into the late hours of the day. They worked hard, in continued pursuit of their goals to become the ideal LIPxLIP—

[crazyexdirkfriend]

Hiiii

I was wondering if you had any advice on writing fics? I find myself struggling with structure/timeline(?) the most

Hi! Thanks for asking! Hmm I'm not sure what tips I have for you exactly, but I'll try and explain my process.

I have two approaches myself when I write fic:

I plan meticulously. I know exactly every scene and every chapter that will be in the fic. I do an outline, I explain it, and then I write it-- sometimes in order, generally depending on what bit I want to write when to keep myself motivated. Examples of this approach: Can Town Communication Manual, Okay Cupid!, calvariæ

I come up with a concept, theme, plot premise. And then I write whatever I want, whenever I want to, and when I have a solid chunk written I start figuring out how that's all supposed to flow together and tidy it up, write the intermittent parts etc. Examples of this approach: we were something, perpetuity, eschewal

Two alternatives to those: Now and then I write a fic in one sitting, such as lunar calendar, let it linger, or vote now on your phones. And now and then something theoretically has a chapter plan or structure but I go so loosey goosey off script that it ends up not mattering at all, such as shag emotionally devastate etc. or two short hours etc.

I will admit, most of my approaches use 2. BUT. I can use 2. because I spent about 4-5 years writing only using approach 1 and can generally eyeball what something is supposed to look like. Am I always right? No. But generally I think my pacing works for what I want it for.

BUT you want advice, not me being like eh? I throw darts at a board and sometimes they stick?

Okay! So here are my guides.

One, look at a three act structure. I ganked this one from the internet.

This is how a typical movie or book or, yes, fanfiction is set up. How this works is v easy to explain for multichapters or longfics with numbers in my opinion. Take a ten chapter standard long fic.

Chapters 1-2 should introduce your characters and premise, and involve your inciting incident- ie, what idea is dropped into the narrative that is going to make the rest of this plot roll out.

Chapters 3-4 should get your ball rolling. The plot should be happening, characters should be introduced, your quest should be underway.

Chapter 5 (and maybe one before or after) is where stakes should be getting high, the action is rising, the tension is occuring. Things are starting to get into action.

Chapter 6 or 7 should have a new plot point or a twist in the tale. Something goes very wrong or very right. A battle results in a huge victory and our hero is cocky. Or they lose a football game and it's a huge blow. Some wedge comes between our favourite ship- and they're going to need to confront it. This is often where a couple hook up for the first time in romances- that can be done well, it's often cliche, but hey fanfiction in general is. Here you can also have the calm before the storm too- things can be going wrong, but they can also be going well! Too well.

Chapter 8 is your conflict climax, the culmination of what you've been building up to. This is often where your ship will realise they have a seemingly irreconcilable difference, or they'll have a dispute that leads to a breakdown. An earlier betrayal can be revealed! In non romances, your hero can realise they've been fighting for a lie, they can be taken off the football team for something, their friends can abandon them. You know this part in a movie- it's where the music builds and you start to feel sick with stress. Or at least I do.

Chapter 9 is your resolution, your falling action. If you're going to fix things, this is where you do it. This is your resolution climax-- if your protagonist is going to, hm, chase their love interest through an airport to propose or confess their undying love or apologise for all their misdeeds, this is where they do it.

Chapter 10 is your quiet end, your new beginning: your epilogue if you will. Or, since this is fanfiction, this is often where you stick the sex scene but I often find that can be tonally jarring. Up to you!

Now you may be thinking: JEEZ that's awfully rigid. Well that's for math structure nerds like me who need to get their pacing down. That is to be taken not as gospel, but as a very basic "yes this is proven to work, if needs be" structure guide. It's the structure you'll find in classic films such as Legally Blonde 2001 or Music and Lyrics 2007 (warning: music and lyrics is not a classic film). But structures ARE made to be played with and broken. But to do that you need to understand the basic structure first, and then play with it. If you don't, you'll end up with like 7 climaxes like Outbreak 1995

One shots often don't have this kind of structure. There is no conflict in perpetuity for example. There's no real resolution in shag emotionally devastate etc. That's fine! I am a big big big BIG believer that writing form is a specific skill: not every novel writer can write poetry, not every poet can write plays etc. And fanfiction allows writers to use prose in a way that doesn't work in stand-alone fiction.

Which brings us to point two: meat and candy

Ganking this from Hussie himself because it does genuinely mean something. If we take meat to be plot, form, action, and candy to mean character, relationships, dialogue, then we know that any good story has BOTH. Fanfiction can sometimes get away with being all candy (fluff fic, aus, etc) and movies often get away with being all meat (can you remember the characters in various action films?). But generally speaking? You need that balance. Without candy, I don't care about your characters enough to give a shit if one of them dies in the meat. Without meat, there are no stakes, no tension, just some characters having meaningless banter that goes nowhere.

So with structure, you need both. You need a plot that's engaging and you need enough tension, twists, stakes in that to keep readers interested. But you also need to pad that out with periods of rest for your characters to speak to each other, show us things about themselves, and show their every day lives. We'll care more when we see what's being snatched away from them.

Ideally, you interweave this. Casual conversations will drop little tidbits in that foreshadow something that will happen later in the plot. Action sequences will have little interactions that tell us something about character relationships ie. one character protecting another.

Third point, read more of what you want to write. Look, ideally we'd all broaden our horizons and watch and read loads of things from different forms and genres and we'd all be great at media literacy. But let's face it: maybe you should watch Citizen Kane, but it's probably not going to help you write your fanfiction. What WILL? Reading fanfiction.

But also. You want to write experimental prose fic? Great! Read poetry. Read experimental prose flash fiction. Watch short films at your local LGBT film festival that absolutely bewilder you. You want to write long form ship fic? Great! Read romance chick lit. Watch rom coms. How are these structured? What styles do they use? How do they show love or growing affection? Then GANK IT. I'm stealing the entire "she can't order a sandwich" bit from When Harry Met Sally as we speak.

This also works for my math friends. You love a particular long fic? Want to structure yours that well? Gank it. Copy and past a chapter and see how long it is and aim fo that word count. That fic has 3 scenes per chapter? Aim for 2-4 yourself. 6? Aim for 5-7. How many chapters does it take for the oh oh moment to occur? How many times does the main couple speak per chapter? When does their inciting incident occur? Gank. It. You can't steal a chapter structure so reference it all you want.

And all of that is to say: if you struggle with structure, you need an outline. Check the fic you want to be most like and reference how long it is, how many chapters etc. Then make a bullet point list of each chapter, then fit your plot into it. Then expand it. Expand it some more. Put every detail you need to remember into this outline. Mine are generally 1/8th of the piece's total length. Then sit on it for a week and come back to it. Make sure you're following some act template, or your approximation of it for what you're writing. Make sure each chapter has plot progression and character introspection, meat and candy.

Bonus Round!!! Some random tips

If you struggle with description (LIKE ME) write dialogue first. It's just like rping with yourself and it can help keep your character voices solid.

Try to start and end chapters on engaging notes. One liners, cliff hangers, something to keep people waiting without pissing them off. True cliffhangers (near deaths, accidents etc) are often cliche, but can be done well. But leave a reader something to chew on, something to comment on, something to hypothesise about. Or even just a line you think fucks.

Can't think of a structure? Write now, figure it out later. One shots often don't need a strict structure, like I said-- sometimes you have the luxury of writing off pure vibes if your themes and characterisation are solid.

Refer back to canon. Call back to canon in text if you have to. But it's always good to have notes for what you're trying to do thematically-- would facets of your character's character interfere with your pacing? ie. yeah okay maybe the couple sleeps together at the chapter 7 point in fanfiction a lot, but if you're writing a character who would never do that, or a character who would have done that 5 chapters ago, then consider if that takes precedence over structure or if there's a reason for this point.

Having a solid chapter plan allows for foreshadowing, even for minor things in dialogue. And this is so so so so so so so fun please don't deprive yourself of this. I am literally kicking my legs writing Okay Cupid! right now. I think there are like 7 incidents of foreshadowing in chapter one alone. I love when a plan comes together.

If you want more writing/storycraft tips and theories: Save the Cat- Blake Snyder (Scriptwriting based) The general go to book for film structure, definitely solved major holes in my script-writing Into the Woods- John Yorke (Storycraft) A classic On Writing- Stephen King (Novel) Worth a read, solved a big character quandary for my personal work

Also I follow a number of writing tumblr blogs that frequently put tips on my dash: you might find these useful too, so I recommend having a scour!

x x x x x Research semiotic theory, such as Barthes (Death of the Author, Mythologies) or Chandler (Semiotics: The Basics). Also look at intertextuality and cross-border, cross-media analysis (Such as Henry Jenkins). This is if you're feeling adventurous and want to look at thematic structure in Homestuck and apply this to your work. You can write very good fic without ever considering this, so this is an if you're interested not a you must.

Anyway that was obscenely long because I do NOT know how to structure a neat ask response, but I hope this is all of some use to you! Good luck with your fic writing, and if you've any more questions shoot them my way!