#i will say since i draw him a lot. i do prefer bottom leaning satan

[odysseys-blood]

just curious where other people fall on this

*if you have multiple answer, based on just one of them. or dont do what u want

[realcube]

soft haikyuu!! boys with a baddie* s/o  😈

characters:  yamaguchi, hinata, suga, akaashi, nishinoya & tendou

tw// swearing

*(a/n): anon requested a kinda sassy, sarcastic reader and verbatim ‘she is basically a salt bag, but she also has like some sugar’  so i simplified that down to baddie :) so the reader isn’t really a delinquent but they are a bit rough around the edges uffabvrslbv 

Tadashi Yamaguchi

he definitely thinks you’re really cool and he wants to be just like you :O

bc you give off ‘bad bitch who doesn’t care about what other ppl think about them’ energy and what he would give tO HAVE THAT!!

so that’s when he knew he needed to be your friend >:) 

so he was like ‘tsukki, go talk to (y/n) for me >:)’ thinking that was his first step to becoming confident pfft

luckily, god was on his side though bc the teacher rearranged the seats and you and him were sitting next to each other 

hence, he got the opportunity to talk to you without it seeming too forced

you both fell for each other so hard

like he would act tough to try impress you but you preferred his natural softness while you tried to act uncharacteristically docile so you wouldn’t scare him off but he liked you for your boldness 

it was a match made in heaven 💞

he eventually worked up the courage to ask you out one day and y’all have just been falling more ever since

although, that doesn’t mean yamaguchi’s forgotten one of the main reasons he wanted to be with you in the first place

‘please teach me your ways, (y/n)!’ he pleaded, his head resting on your lap so you had to cover his puppy-eyes with your phone

‘no, tadashi. firstly, you’re sweet and gentle- you’re just built like that. secondly, i don’t have any ‘ways’ to teach you!’

yamaguchi continued to pry, ‘then how are you just so effortlessly self-assured?’

‘who told you that, tadashi?’

‘no one.’ yamaguchi poked the back of your hand to get you to move it, ‘but remember that time one of the guys in our class tried to make fun of the size of your head and you told him to shut up?’

you rolled your eyes, setting your phone aside before placing a brief kiss on yamaguchi’s forehead, ‘he said he couldn’t see the board because of my ‘big head’, tadashi; that’s hardly an insult. also, what else could i have possibly said other than that?’

but then you remembered this is yamaguchi you’re talking to; if that was him, he’d probably apologise, move his head aside then cry in the bathroom or sumn.

‘i should be the one asking you why you’re so insecure. i mean, i know everyone is a little bit insecure about something but you just take it to a whole other level.’ you mused, absentmindedly massaging his scalp

yamaguchi frowned, ‘exactly! teach me how to stop being insecure.’

‘no please, no thank you?’ you inquired with a snicker, realising that your habits might of accidentally rubbed off on him

bc just a few weeks ago, he’d be thanking you for breathing the same air as him but now he didn’t even say ‘please’ when asking for a favour 

gasp

‘please teach me how to be resilient, (y/n).’

you chuckled, leaning down to whisper in his ear, ‘okay, since you’re so polite, i’ll tell you my secret - but promise not to tell anybody else!.’

‘i promise.’ yamaguchi replied without hesitation

‘okay, first thing you need to do is go to the depths of hell and find satan hims--’ 

yamaguchi let out a sigh as he realised that you weren’t being serious then playfully flicked your forehead away, ‘rude.’

you beamed, pressing another kiss upon his forehead, ‘i know~’

Shōyō Hinata

let’s not pretend hinata wasn’t shitting his pants when he first heard about you from kageyama

‘they called me a shitty setter the other day.’

but kageyama failed to mention the part where he cut you in line for lunch 🙄 mans had it coming

like hinata genuinely thought that if he came within a 5 foot radius of you, you’d literally come for volleyball career

plus, hinata knew he had a lot of things to be insults on (mostly, his height) so he decided to keep his distance at first 

but when he actually saw you - rather than a vague description that kageyama conjured - he kinda fell head over heels

well, not only bc of your looks - he isn’t that shallow

but the same day, you dropped your purse/wallet on the walk home and ,mhsince hinata was walking behind you, he acted as any good Samaritan would; picked it up then handed it to you 

then you said something along the lines of ‘thanks, shorty.’

not shawty. lord- shorty as in short with a y at the end

and whether you meant that as a dig or not was beyond him - but either way, he fkn adored it 

also it doesn’t matter whether you are taller or shorter than hinata- he is still short-stuff >:)

by some miracle he managed to ask you out successfully and he’s kinda been glued to you ever since

like he wants to spend every second that he’s not at volleyball club/school with you 

and if you tell him he’s being clingy, he’s going to cry-

nonono jk jk

he’d probably be a bit offended but then give you your space

also, you noticed how he was really endeared by the tad mean nicknames you gave him like ‘shorty’, ‘short stuff’ and ‘ginger’

the only ones he didn’t like was ‘boke’ or ‘dumbass’ bc it reminded him too much of kageyama + tsukishima

so you started calling him these things - teasingly - more frequently 

and he loves it ngl

as long as you aren’t truly mean to him, he enjoys being called these things by you for some reason

so, his first mistake was assuming that you’d like being called these joking nicknames just as much as he does

you were helping him with english once and it’s definitely not his strong suit

same, hinata

‘look at that! you spelt all your vocabs correctly, for a change.’ you commented, peering over the desk at the paper sitting in front of him

his eyes widened and his lips curled into a hopeful smile, ‘really?!’

‘no.’ you snickered, pointing to the first word on the list. ‘your word was taxis - you wrote ‘texas’, dumbass.’

hinata let out an exasperated sigh, propping his elbow onto the table to rest his cheek on his palm

then, he had an idea ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

‘alright, stupidface, should i rewrite them?’

you gasped, furrowing your brows at what he just called you 

for a moment, you thought you might’ve misheard him but upon observing his smug expression, you realised that he really did just call you a ‘stupidface’ 

so you burst out laughing 

obviously, hinata was rather shocked at your reaction

‘hey! what’s so funny?’

‘di- di- did you just call me a ‘stupidface’?!’ you panted in-between cackles, clutching your stomach to soothe the butterflies

hinata jutted out his bottom lip and folding his arms over his chest, ‘yeah, what about it?’

‘that is so cute!- do it again!’ you demanded, enthusiastically slamming your fist against the desk

‘IT’S NOT CUTE!’ hinata barked, playfully flicking your forehead 

once you caught your breath, you took hinata’s hands and looked him dead in the eyes, ‘you’re fucking adorable, shōyō.’

the hoarseness of your voice making it sound like somewhat of a threat 

‘you’re adorable-er, (y/n).’

‘i know.’

Kōshi Sugawara 

he admires how strong and independent you are/seem 😍

and the fact you don’t go out of your way to suck-up to ppl 

he kinda wants to be like you in that sense but unlike yamaguchi, he accepts that he’s way too much of a people pleaser for that lol

so he sticks to admiring you from afar

then he musters up the courage to ask you out with some chocolate cupcakes; the same kind that you accidentally got on his blazer on the first day of second year :))

and you say yes (╯▽╰ )

also a big part of your relationship is aggressive positivity ✨😡

like if he makes a joke about looking crusty, you’ll promptly respond, ‘shut up, kōshi - you look so hot.’

or if you berate yourself for getting a poor mark on a test, suga will interrupt with no hesitation, ‘fuck off, (y/n), you’re literally so smart and hard working - you’ll probably get 100% on the next test.’

also when he’s around you he switches between canon and fanon suga rapidly 

one second he’s like ‘aww, are you stressed bc of school? i’ll bake you some cookies, baby--’ then you’ll jokingly make a comment about his post-practise B.O and he’ll literally get so defensive

‘WOW I OFFER YOU SOMETHING NICE AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?! STOP BEING SO MEAN TO ME, COMING FOR MY INSECURITES LIKE THAT  - I WAS JUST ABOUT TO GO FOR A SHOWER ANYWAY GEEZ’ ┗|｀O′|┛

ISVBFELIAEA plz he is too much ✋

he just prides himself in smelling like ocean breeze 99% of the time so you really didn’t need to hurt his feelings like that when you caught him lackin c’mon LMAO

‘wait so are we making cookies or not?’ you inquired, stifling a snicker at his little diva moment

‘ofc we are 🥺’  

he’ll probably use red icing on one of the cookies to draw a ‘>:(’ face then hand it to you, saying that he drew you

he’ll also break of bits of his own cookie and feed it to you’re doing something that requires both hands like typing, homework, dishes etc

whether you eat it from his hand happily, decline his offer or bite his fingers off is really up to you 

and over time, he probably picks up on some of your traits too

especially being more straight-forward 

the team will never forget the first time he was chatting about something with the vice principle and ‘sorry, but i don’t remember asking’  fell from his lips 

everyone was shocked :o

tsukishima, tanaka & noya were so impressed tho

and so were you IVBEAOGVRN

‘wow, suga. you wanna be me so bad.’ you gloated, pressing your hand against your chest 

‘GAEIVBSLR leave me alone.’ he growled, toiling over the apology letter he was currently writing to the vice principal

Keiji Akaashi 

he wanted you to be the dark academia to his light academia pfft

it was very much love at first sight btw 

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ soulmates  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

the embodiment of opposites attract

he’d write you a poem/love letter to ask you out lol

‘you’re so sappy and lame, akaashi’ you scoffed in attempt to hide the smile that was tugging at the corners of your lips as your eyes finally parted from the letter to meet his 

he couldn’t help but chuckle, ‘so is that a no?’

‘-nonono!’ you shook your head rapidly, hastily correcting him, ‘it’s a yes.’

phew 

honestly, he acted all nonchalant on the outside, but akaashi would’ve been devastated if you rejected him

like he constantly tried to remind himself that you would probably say no, i mean he thought you were way out of his league. plus, it didn’t seem as though you were as much of a romantic as him

but fortunately, apart of him stayed hopeful 

now he was cuddled up beside you on a cold winters’ evening, casually drinking is hot cocoa as you both watched a disney movie (❤´艸｀❤)

he’s the type to not even care or retort if you call him stupid or whatever

as long as your context makes it clear that you’re joking 

he’d never call you those names back though ✋

to him, you’re always gonna be ‘love’ or ‘sweetheart’

also, he’s probably equally as sarcastic as you so that’s not an issue 

ngl he probably gets really insecure when you’re hesitant about PDA tho

like he just wants to hold your hand but he doesn’t want to force it upon you and make you uncomfortable 🥺

but also, perhaps you’re too embarrassed by him to kiss him in public 

so please occasionally reassure him that you love him (；′⌒`) that always washes all his worries away 

Yū Nishinoya

it’s literally canon that he likes ppl who show 0 interest in him (kiyoko, tsukki etc)

so it shouldn’t be surprising that he’s all over you after that one time you called him a midget 

to be fair, he had it coming - he stepped on your fkn toe >:(( 

he does everything in his power to impress you and get you to take back what you said 

‘hey, (y/n)!’ he calls out to you in the middle of the bustling lunch hall, ‘could a midget do this?!’ *backflips off the table*

or when he demanded that you come to one of his volleyball games so you could see what he’s capable of and whenever he makes a good receive, he turns to look at you in the stands and winks/ points

or when he actually studies for a test just so he can flaunt his slightly above average grade to you 

‘look, (y/n), i got a 49%!’ he waves a paper in front of your face, which you stare at before lowering your gaze onto your 95%.

but ngl..he really brings out that lil’ bit of sugar in you 

‘well done, noya.’ you choked out feeling your dignity slowly fade in your chest

he’s just so enthusiastic and charming how can you be mean to him 🥺

to his face, at least

as soon as he leaves you beef about him to your friends

‘he is so annoyingly bodacious - audacious! why does he feel the need to show me all of his achievements like i care??? and why does he have to be so cute while doing it???’

‘do you think you maybe have a teeny-tiny crush on him?--’

‘never.’

nishinoya probably asks you out pretty casually like ‘lemme take you bowling this saturday and i can show how good i am at that too!’ he offered with a bright, bold smile

‘sure, whatever.’

‘kay! it’s a date!’

‘wut-’ but before you could question him further, he sped off

nishinoya really likes to fluster and tease you 

you’ll be sitting waiting for him at the park or whatever and he’ll swagger in and shout something like ‘how’s my gorgeous s/o doing today?! i hope you weren’t waiting for me too long!--’

then you’ll have to quickly shush him before everyone with a 7 feet radius is looking at you judgementally 

he also likes to call you the most extra nicknames just to see you blush

‘good morning, my beautiful, divine, radiant god(dess) who i worship every morning of my life!~’ he sung as he waltzed into your classroom to spend lunch with you 

but he only does that bc you are so dismissive of his advances lol

like if you openly adored his kisses and nicknames, he’d probably do them sparingly  

oh and he calls you ‘my hunny bunny’ too - don’t ask why 

Satori Tendō

you gave him your number/snap for a project and he’s one of those ppl that just assumes that y’all are friend now lol

but that wasn’t nessicarily a bad thing bc you thought he was really cool and you were happy that you still got to talk to him even after the project was over 

not that you’d ever admit it tho (╹ڡ╹ )

he’d send you cursed memes at 3AM and you’d reply like ‘mood’  then he’d fall for you 

you’d also have random, deep convos in the middle of the night 

hence he fell for you even harder 

especially bc he basically just shared his whole life story with you 

he’d spill out all his insecurities to you then you’d reply like ‘ok’ then he knew he had to ask you out bc you’re the first person not to have left him on read

so he asked you to meet him in the park and you’d reply ‘no lol  🖕 ‘ 

then he’d just smile at his phone like ‘wow, they’re so in love with me’

he’s just so used to his friends being mean to him jokingly that he can’t even tell if you’re being serious or not

so he goes to the park at the time he put forward, and ofc you’re there even though you said no bc you didn’t want tendō to show up for nothing 🥺

he was ecstatic that you were there and he probably brought you an energy drink or lollipop then asked you out

and ofc you said yes

i mean- you had kinda developed a soft spot for the poor guy 

you’d let him get away with certain things that others couldn’t around you 

for instance, you’d let him borrow your pencils/pens despite usually not allowing others to get ahold of your stuff

but that was just coz like- he’s your trustworthy bf- not some random classmate who had no reason or motive to be kind enough to return your pencils 

also, you’d let him cut in front of you in the lunch line and he did the same for you

oh and please bully anyone who makes fun of him 🙏

[skepticaloccultist]

Bibliotheca Occultorum - Carl Abrahamsson

At some point in this endeavor I began thinking about the incredible private book collections and occult libraries throughout the world. In all ages those who have sought the discovery of occult knowledge have collected books. John Dee himself once amassed the largest private library (occult or otherwise) in Britain. Yet with a handful of exceptions most contemporary collectors are rather private about their collections, hoarding them like Smaug over his gold pile. But there exists out in the world many contemporary private occult libraries filled with incredible volumes and fantastic stories.

So I thought why not a series about occultist's libraries? Thus the "Bibliotheca Occultorum" series has begun. We will have a look at the private libraries of various occultists, authors and publishers and see what we can discover hidden among their stacks.

We begin our series with an interview with Carl Abrahamsson. Based in Stockholm, Sweden Carl is a composer, publisher, filmmaker and author. As part of the musical groups White Stains and Cotton Ferox, Carl has been long active in the world of experimental and industrial music and as the cofounder of Edda Publishing and owner of Trapart he has long been a proponent of the esoteric and occult. Carl's inauguration of the series comes just as the most recent volume of his annual Fenris Wolf collection series is released. Something I will be reviewing in the near future.

++++++++++

Carl Abrahamsson interviewed by Eldred Wormwood

Tell me about your library. How many books would you say you have in total? How much of that is occult specific literature? Do you keep your library in a specific room dedicated or spread throughout your home?

My library can seem chaotic, both in terms of contents and order (or lack of it). For me, an ideal, perfectly organised library is an elevated pipe dream and one I would not like to manifest. Paradoxical as it may sound, for me a perfectly organised library is a stagnant thing, like death. My library needs to be filled with life: additions, subtractions and re-shapings, changes of direction and renewed interest. There is no motion of association in perfection. I would estimate that I have 4000 books in my home and I have some stashed away too. Of these, I’d say 500 cover topics such as occultism, religion, mythology and similar things. The walls are covered with shelves from top to bottom in two rooms, and the rest are in piles, wardrobes and windows in other rooms. The fact that I also run a publishing company doesn’t help.

Do you collect any specific type of book? My library tends to lean toward folklore/ethnographic oriented work and non fiction. Is there something you go for more than the rest?

I’m happy to say that I suffer from bibliomania rather than bibliophilia. I love beautiful books and if there is a choice I will buy the more lavish edition. But I don’t collect anything in particular. I’m more of a general devourer. When it comes to the occult stuff, I have moved through phases in life. Thelema has been there all along, as has LaVeyan Satanism and TOPY-related material. Daoism is also something that’s interested me all along, and that I actually keep buying. When it comes to the new generation of occult publishers, I buy selected titles that speak to me. As I grow older, I seem to like older texts and books. Alchemical and cosmic illustrations and illuminations inspire me – and iconography in general – but I don’t feel I specifically have to own the old editions.

Who is your favorite occult author? Any first editions or particularly lovely bindings by said author?

The above mentioned thematic examples would/could mean Crowley (intelligent, but so narcissistic it quickly becomes boring for me now), LaVey (who grew from a cut and paste provocateur to a genuinely real and vital thinker/writer) and material by Genesis Breyer P-Orridge (whose genius has existed in applying art talk to magic and vice versa). Spare was quickly outshone by Nietzsche but once upon a time he was important to me. I don’t think I have any super-rarities. I have Crowley’s autograph from a torn collection of Lord Byron’s poetry he used to own. And a copy of "Equinox of the Gods" that used to belong to Sybil Leek. Most of the LaVey stuff I have signed by him for me, which is great. And the TOPY stuff with Genesis too – and that’s still a continuing and inspirational saga. The magic of books and especially personalised books transcend the occult, as we know. People obsessed with different areas and authors can draw magical power via signed copies of books and items. It’s interesting that it seems to become a “double whammy” (at least unconsciously) among occult book collectors, as it actually seems possible to tap in via the talismanic, signed editions. It isn’t as far-fetched and hocus pocus as it may sound. Consider the difference between a memory of a person and a photograph of that person. And then a signature on that photo. The physicality of that documentation becomes a very tangible gateway. Ditto with not just the book but specifically the signed book.

How much of your book buying comes from in bookstore purchases versus online? What percentage of the books you buy are new versus used?

This varies. Under normal circumstances I’m very busy and hardly have the time to look for things online. So when I go into actual stores in different places I have an ecstatic blast and I do most of my buying there. I have no preference in re: new vs old. If the book interests me, I’ll get it.

Any good occult bookshop stories? Do you have favorite shops you frequent in your travels?

As they’re dwindling, I’ll have to look to memory lane first. Stockholm had two that were totally seminal for me as a youngster: East & West and Vattumannen. That’s really where it all began for me, early 1980s. The latter still exists, but has gone down the new age drain. I had the opportunity to chat with Herman Slater at Magickal Childe in New York way back when, which was fun. The Bodhi Tree in LA was good in the early 90s. I still frequent Watkins, Treadwell’s and Atlantis when in London, and they’re all good. I usually have my UK book events at Atlantis. I’ve been at Catland in New York, and I admire their fighting spirit. Nekropolis in Copenhagen is similarly small but nice. I guess there’s one little watering hole in every civilised city. At least I hope so.

What are you currently reading?

I usually read many books at the same time. Right now I’m churning through Werner Herzog’s “Conquest of the useless”, Ryan & Jetha's “Sex at dawn", Ray Bradbury’s “The Illustrated Man”, the essays of Osip Mandelstam, the collected stories of Ben Hecht, Houellebecq’s book on Lovecraft, and Lacan’s “Feminine Sexuality”. That quite accurately describes my focus in life right now, which is as it should be and what books should do.

As the publisher and editor of the Fenris Wolf, what is your perspective on the wider world of occult books, bookbinding and collecting?

I have written about how the current fine book-making is a very integrated part of the occult revival. The books not only contain interesting and inspirational ideas but will continue to do so in the future (when they will also be well needed). It’s not just an indulgent enjoyment to make fine and lasting books but also a very smart strategy for survival. Crowley wanted his system to live on and the Equinox has certainly fulfilled that wish. My own reasons for publishing The Fenris Wolf are similar but decidedly non-sectarian. It seems the focus of most of the publishers is an active transcendence between old and new, in which both are essential parts (for instance, the reverence for old grimoires in combination with social media strategies). There’s also a focus on neo-exoticism in many of them, which is a meta-pragmatic reaction to the "chaotic stasis" of the world in general, and as such a healthy thing. It seems to me that the well-made and beautiful occult books chronicling these teachings and groups have been instrumental in their development and success.

There is rather a renaissance in occult publishing, particularly in terms of fine bindings, happening at the moment. The independents have done so well with it we are even seeing old mainstream stalwarts like Llewellyn putting out slip-cased leather volumes. Any publishers in particular or contemporary volumes you own that you feel are exemplars of this current revival?

The obvious example would be Scarlet Imprint, who produce such beautiful books with such loving determination. It was kind of flabbergasting to see the deluxe of my book Reasonances bound in salmon! Their strata are also intelligent, meaning catering to each kind of purse. The deluxes are super-nice but expensive, and then there’s a sliding scale price wise, although not really sliding in quality. And there are many others too. At Edda Publishing we tried to always make snazzy editions and succeeded quite well. I carry on that mind frame into Trapart Books, but not for its own sake. I want to publish good books, period. But I certainly don’t mind catering to the hardcore collectors at the same time.

With the Fenris Wolf you have been putting that out sporadically since 1989. There are a range of important writers that have contributed to Fenris Wolf over the years, how has the content you are publishing changed or evolved over that time?

Now that it’s an annual venture, I can see it getting more and more eclectic. It’s not meant to be a back-to-back read but rather an accumulation of surprising and inspiring stuff. I want to record and document certain things, people and phenomena, and at the same time discover new writers and new perspectives. You can fit a lot under the magico-anthropological umbrella! The most recent issue, for instance, collects the papers (and more) from a conference that my wife, Vanessa Sinclair, and I organised in London last year: "Psychoanalysis, Art & the Occult". That was a really nice event. So this particular Fenris is pretty focused on that trio of subjects, whereas the normal mix would contain magics new and old, occulture and psychedelics. I can see it going in many different directions. Number ten will of course be spectacular, as it’s a celebratory issue. Issue number 11 will be slimmer but helpful – it will be an index volume for issues 1-10.

How involved are you in the production of the volumes?

I always work with the same printers, so we have gotten to know each other well, and know what can be done. I’m currently drifting more into art books and that means harder quality control. But the way things are going, I’m very happy. California Infernal: Anton LaVey & Jayne Mansfield as portrayed by Walter Fischer sold out quickly and we will very soon see an expanded edition of that. I’m involved on/in all levels of production, from beginning to end. Sometimes I work with outside people. The LaVey-Mansfield project was one such occasion. There I worked together with the owner of the images so that we were both pleased with the result. But on the whole it’s a pretty solitary affair. The most recent issue of Fenris Wolf was edited together with my wife, and we will definitely make more books together. So I guess I’m branching out. And I’m very fortunate to be married to someone who loves books just as much as I do!

  Find out more about Carl's work and publishing here:

www.trapart.net www.carlabrahamsson.com

Watch Carl's films here: https://vimeo.com/user3979080/vod_pages